Demon Bonds

The weeping princess. That's what the recruits in the royal guard called me. It was a nickname and a challenge simultaneously, both among the night guard and the day guard. After Shining won Cadance's affection with the grand gesture to overshadow everypony else, I gave up on my crush and 'moved on.' I didn't go to the ball. I didn't even attend the graduation ceremony. I didn't even collect my high school diploma. I just... concentrated on my princess duties, excelling in my military training, and learning everything Arcane Sigil and Aunt Celestia taught Cadance and me without complaint.

I followed through with my promise of reforming the political structure in the following years until I was officially 'twenty' again. My pony visage looked the part of a young adult—and more importantly—fertile mare that turned the heads of those around her because she knew how sexy she was.

And yet, I felt hollow, watching Cadance and Shining go on dates. He treated her right, not how I always imagined he would, letting his dick control him. And Cadance liked him, even though she had yet to kiss him as far as I was aware. Among other, more mature stuff. Unlike me. I was taking my frustrations out on the guard, letting one recruit after another get intimate with their princess.

It was of no surprise to anypony that I became known as the slutty one while Cadance was the sweet, innocent girl too prudish to even kiss the guy she was dating. It infuriated her to no end, but I made no effort to change the public's opinion of me. Why would I? I was a slut, I didn't do love. I did pleasure, and I wasn't afraid to become the wet dream of every straight stallion and lesbian mare out there. And everything in between—I very much liked sucking off a pretty trans mare whenever I went out for a night of fun in the city. Those that were comfortable enough with their anatomy, at least.

Eight Bit joined the guard with Shining Armor despite always wanting to become a software developer. It was kind of pathetic of him to try and stay close to me, but what did I expect? That we would go our separate ways after school, and he would forget me? He was the only pony I refused to let enter my bed chambers. He and Shining Armor—not that Shiny would ever think of cheating on Cadance (and not just because of the threat I made to him).

Cadance became even more beautiful, looking exactly like how I remembered she looked in the mirror. The only difference was she didn't look at me the same way. We didn't even hang out anymore. All her free time was taken up by her 'special somepony.' I felt sick just thinking about it.

A small part of me felt like Shining Armor was doing it intentionally, but that couldn't be true. Betrayal put aside, we were friends; why would he purposely keep her away from me? I was imagining things.

So... the reason for my nickname? Every guard I had sex with only made that gaping hole in my heart hurt worse. I cried tears of agony and despair, of heartbreak, of anguish, during and after the climax of orgasm. Nopony knew why, and I preferred to keep it that way. Hence, I was called the weeping princess; nopony could make me happy with their performance. No stallion, no mare, no intersex or transgender pony. No one. I suspected even a tentacle monster wouldn't have made me happy right now.

The sound of a throat being cleared made my ears twitch. "Princess."

I glanced at Kibitz and wondered, not for the first time, if I should broaden my spectrum to include older ponies in my pursuits. Maybe a milf or gentlestallion with more experience could finally do the impossible and get me to cry out their name in joy instead of loathing. I doubted it.

"Yes?" I asked, voice monotone.

"You have been staring at that document for an awfully long time," the elderly butler slash royal scheduling advisor remarked, adjusting his reading glasses with a professional flair. "Is something the matter?"

"No," I responded, sighing in lament. "Say, Kibitz..?"

"Yes, Princess?" the pale gamboge unicorn pony said curtly. Ugh. I rolled my eyes at his behavior. He never got that stick up his ass unstuck, seriously.

"Am I beautiful?" I asked him without any ulterior motives. I knew the old guy wouldn't even look at me that way; he was just that professional. He was married to his job, through and through. Besides, he was the next best thing to an actual grandfather to me, it felt wrong to think of him as anything other than that.

"Your Highness, it isn't my place to judge the aesthetics of a pony such as yourself," he reminded me. I propped up my head on my foreleg, giving him an unimpressed and bored look.

"Uh-huh," I drawled out, going back to reading the document before me. "Is that your way of telling me, 'I can't answer that, or I'll lose my job'?"

"Princess," Kibitz admonished me. I merely grumbled back at him. Killjoy. "Is there a reason for the sudden interest in my opinion? It is to my understanding that many ponies enjoy your company; would that not suffice?"

Ugh. "You know what? Forget that I asked," I grumbled, levitating the quill over to sign the approval of funds for the royal guard to upgrade their gear as well as recruitment efforts.

I've been handling the military aspect of being a princess more and more lately. Maybe because I seemed more approachable to the majority of the ponies serving in the military than Cadance or Aunt Celestia. And Sunset. She hated my guts, so the majority of the guards hated her guts, in turn. It was as simple as that. Not that they would ever admit it to her face. Only the ultra-conservative generals seemed to prefer Sunset for reasons that boiled entirely down to racism.

Speaking of the adopted daughter of my aunt, she took the bait and started to secretly investigate me of being a changeling, not that she could prove it 'yet.' I was sure she was plotting something behind her mother's back to oust me as a soulless, emotion-devouring monster.

Suffice it to say, she wasn't an alicorn 'yet,' much to her chagrin and my eternal suffering. It showed in her attitude whenever she was forced to speak to Cadance, Aunt Celestia, or me. I received the brunt of her condescension and anger since I deserved my position 'the least,' according to her. I think Aunty gave up on that front, as well. Sunnybitch Junior refused to listen to her, so my aunt focused more on Twilight Sparkle's education instead. No amount of mother-daughter counseling could fix what Sunset had gotten into her head.

Twilight, on the other hoof, had her own 'ticks,' so to speak. She developed an almost fanatical zeal trying to please my aunt. So much so that she often neglected her own health in favor of studying. And that was the only thing anypony could motivate her into doing; everything else was a tug of war between her and her books. Sometimes literally.

The little filly was barely ten, yet she didn't even attempt to socialize or speak with anyone who wasn't a princess or her family. I doubted she even noticed that her brother started dating Cadance. I was honestly starting to get worried. What worried me far more, though, were her neurotic anxiety attacks at the mere thought of disappointing Princess Celestia.

I swear, Aunty Celestia and foals were a terrible mix. I had no idea what she did to them, but it couldn't be a coincidence that they all ended up with psychological problems in one form or another. I already spoke to her, but aside from being the princess, she had no idea what could be causing it. Thankfully, she brought up the idea of a therapist with her parents, and they agreed that it would be for the best if their daughter regularly spoke with one to at least help her deal with it healthily and constructively.

Speaking of seeing a therapist, I still kept avoiding it. Aunt Celestia even recommended that I also see Doctor Tender Care, who she reassured me wouldn't scream in terror and would keep my true nature a secret (or so she claimed). I couldn't bring myself to approach the pinto unicorn mare by myself, though. Yes, I knew I should get around to doing it. I more than needed it, what with my obvious problem of crippling jealousy, but it was just too hard to get over my stupid hang-ups. I might have given up on getting Cadance to notice me that way, but my heart couldn't lie. Not to me, anyway.

And let's be honest here, I would screw my own therapist. I would screw my own therapist because I was too goddamn fucking afraid to admit I loved Cadance to anyone aside from myself, patient confidentiality or not.

I sighed. I hated Shining Armor. Why did he have to have the guts to do what he did? I underestimated him. And now, here I was, unable to enjoy the one thing that landed me in Hell in the first place: spreading my legs. He took everything from me. Asshole.

Ah, who was I kidding when I pretended I didn't know why I was sentenced to Hell? It didn't take a genius to figure out why Michael sent me downstairs. I knew the reason perfectly well. I might have been coerced into doing it at first, but it didn't change the fact I loved doing it. I was the perfect fit for becoming a succubus, not only because I had an insatiable hunger for dicks but also because I cared about making it the most enjoyable experience for anyone having sex with me (whether or not I did it for entirely selfish reasons, notwithstanding).

But now, I lost my spark. I couldn't bring myself to care; I only did it out of habit and as a coping mechanism, hoping that somepony would take my mind off of Cadance. So far, nopony did, and I doubted anypony ever would. I was cursed to lament my inability to get over my love for her.

"Kibitz?" I hummed listlessly, slumping down in my chair in a very unprincess-like fashion. The stallion in question raised a bushy eyebrow in response. It was weird at first, but I was getting used to ponies with 'facial hair.' It kind of humanized ponies in a way that wasn't even that uncanny (seeing him without his eyebrows would have been weirder... I think). "Is there anything else on the schedule aside from this crap?" I motioned toward the stack of papers, and Kibitz fished out a little notebook from his uniform's pocket.

"Language, Princess," he admonished me before squinting closely at his writing. "Aside from your usual hours of office work, there's also a scheduled meeting with the military officers in an hour, a short break for lunch, filling in two hours of court for your aunt until Princess Cadance switches with you, and—"

He was interrupted by a knock on the door, and as eager as I was to keep doing my paperwork, I immediately called out with an, "Enter!"

Eight Bit nudged the door open, looking as awkward as ever in his enchanted armor. He saluted me. "Princess."

"Recruit Eight Bit," I responded, frowning. He tried to not let it show, but Eight Bit still winced and deflated slightly at my cold greeting. "Report."

The brownish-gray stallion glanced at Kibitz for a moment before turning back to me, saying, "General Bulwark requests your presence, Ma'am."

Ugh, I hated that guy. Well, it seemed I would be getting out of doing paperwork for the day, at least. Woe is me. "Alright, let's see what this is about," I said, hopping out of my plush chair behind the sturdy desk Aunt Celestia gifted me after the last one unexpectedly gave out on me. On the other hoof, this one was really sturdy (wink wink).

Kibitz looked disgruntled at having his meticulously planned schedule messed with, but he took it in stride. Despite having a stick shoved up his bum, he was adaptable to all kinds of unforeseen circumstances. Kinda had to be, what with the usual hectic day-to-day life in the castle.

I let Eight Bit accompany me as I went to the military barracks on the castle grounds, ignoring the glances he gave me. He was a persistent pony; I had to give it to him. I would find it annoying if I still didn't consider him my friend (for some reason). As it stood, it was only a 'minor' inconvenience, pathetic as it was.

What did he even try to accomplish by wasting his future on a job he didn't like or want? It pissed me off that he did it because of me. I ruined his life by unintentionally making him fall in love with me. He could have revolutionized the gaming industry if only he kept at it. What a fucking idiot. I hated him, too.

We entered the royal guard headquarters and were immediately greeted by the Captain of the Guard, and much to my surprise, Agent Furlong and Junior Agent Sweetie Drops.

"Princess," General Bulwark said gruffly, saluting. I nodded back at him, telling him to be at ease while the two agents of the Secret Monster Intelligence League of Equestria fidgeted anxiously next to the stern stallion (or S.M.I.L.E. for short—Aunty had a twisted sense of humor). Agent Furlong had an easier time trying to hide it, but the pale, apple-yellow mare next to him looked like she wished the ground would swallow her up any moment now. The general continued, "As of oh-five-hundred hours, we have a situation on our hooves that requires your attention."

I hummed, mildly curious. "I'm guessing it has something to do with a rogue monster on the loose?" Agent Sweetie Drops winced while Agent Furlong nodded succinctly. "Has my Aunt been informed?"

"Ma'am, Princess Celestia has already left en route for Fillydelphia in preparation for the Summer Sun Celebration," General Bulwark informed me, and I groaned silently. Of course, she did. Fuck me.

"What is it we're dealing with?" I asked, disgruntled about being left alone to deal with this. Don't screw it up, me. It was just the fate of the entire nation on the table. No biggy.

Ugh, what a joyful delight this day was turning out to be. What were the odds of me not utterly ruining the nation by the end of this? No sooner did Aunty Celestia decide to let us handle our responsibilities alone without constant guidance, and things immediately went horribly wrong. Great.

"All information on the target is written down in there," Agent Furlong told me, handing over a manilla folder with 'Top Secret' stamped on it in red ink. I took it from him in my vibrant red magic aura and opened it, uncaring whether or not Eight Bit could see every detail of the files within. The director of the secret intelligence agency made a strangled noise, but I continued reading on, uncaring. "P-Princess! That should be handled with utmost confidentiality!"

I raised a brow, glancing at my bodyguard slash stalker slash only male friend I kinda willingly put up with that I still hated. Said stallion averted his gaze hastily. "If you have an issue with Eight Bit, I trust him," I stated nonchalantly. Eight Bit gave me another one of those hopeful looks while Agent Furlong hesitated at showing him the same trust. "The bugbear escaped Tartarus?" I asked, surprised. "How?"

"That's... my fault, Your Highness," Junior Agent Sweetie Drops answered, ears splayed back in shame. "I was careless, bringing in a dangerous beast. It overwhelmed me and stung the cerberus guarding the gate."

Right. Aunt Celestia's giant three-headed pet dog. "Is the mutt okay?" I asked, frowning with disdain at the thought of having to check up on the stupid behemoth. I really was not a dog person, seriously. It was no wonder after repeatedly getting raped by fucking hellhounds.

Cats were undoubtedly superior. They were cozy little fluff balls that didn't give a shit. And they didn't slobber all over you the first chance they got.

"Cerberus is fine if a bit worse for wear," Agent Furlong responded. "Agent Sweetie Drops acted swiftly and prevented further harm from coming to the dog, but the bugbear managed to get away amidst the chaos."

"I see," I muttered. "So... what now?"

"We are unsure of the current whereabouts of the beast since the tracking chip has been ripped out by it," Agent Furlong admitted while General Bulwark scoffed.

"It can't have gotten far. No nearby city has reported a sighting of the monster. If we act now, we can apprehend the beast and send it back where it belongs," he proposed, glaring sternly at Agent Furlong. "I can prepare the guard for a swift and decisive strike, Your Highness. Give me the word, and I'll have the bugbear back in custody by the end of the day."

"I—" I started, opening my mouth at the same time Agent Furlong rebutted General Bulwark's advice.

"I caution you heavily against sending out troops untrained in dealing with a monster of this scale," he said, frowning at his counterpart in the military. "The bugbear is a cunning opponent; it would be foolish to underestimate it."

"Hah!" Bulwark laughed, scowling humorlessly back. "It was the fault of S.M.I.L.E. that it escaped in the first place! Your carelessness in training your agents shows how incompetent you truly are. The princess should disband your whole organization because it is a joke."

"You can take your grievances with the intelligence agency up to my aunt, but I will do no such thing," I told him with a piercing stare, shutting up any further arguments between them. "Agent Sweetie Drops? You have experience with the beast, don't you?"

"Yes, Your Highness," she responded, standing up straighter. "I was on the team that brought the bugbear in initially, although I only observed that time..."

"That's more experience than I have," I said, alleviating her concerns. "How many ponies would we need with sufficient training?"

"I, uhm..." she hesitated, glancing at her superior before facing me again, uncertain. "I would say about six? A pair of fliers to distract it, an earthpony or two to keep it grounded, preferably with enchanted ropes. Those would have to be maintained by a unicorn."

"So, if I were to come with you, you could keep it in place while I distract it and maintain the spell?" I asked, prompting her to gape at me in surprise.

"Pleasure—I mean, Princess, Ma'am!" Eight Bit exclaimed. "You can't—"

"You're coming with me, Bit," I said, interrupting him. Said stallion paled in fright.

"...w-what?" he squeaked out, and I smiled. "B-but, b-but..!"

"You. Are. Coming. With. Me," I repeated myself, poking him with each word. "Congrats, Eight Bit. You've been promoted to Special Agent Monster Bait."

"Y-you're trying to get rid of me, aren't you?" my friend whispered, whimpering in terror.

"No, what gave you that idea?" I sneered. "I need someone to lure it out and help me distract it. I can't do everything by myself."

"But... don't we need training?"

"What? How to be annoying? I'm sure you can manage that much," I said, shrugging carelessly. "And I am trained. There's nopony more agile in the air than me, and I can shield the whole city of Canterlot during orgasm. I think I can manage a rope." Eight Bit blushed heavily, visibly struggling from popping a boner. "You joined the military, Buster. Own up to it and help me fucking save this country from a bugbear."

"I, uh..." he gulped. "C-can I still quit?"

"That's called desertion, coward," I pointed out, making him flinch. "You can either stallion the fuck up and do this or spend the rest of your life on latrine-cleaning duty out in the Frozen North, asshole."

He shrank in on himself. "That's a bit extreme, isn't it?"

I snorted, amused. "That's me being the generous and kind princess that I am." My eyes glowed sinisterly as I leaned in close to him, sneering at him, "You don't want to know what I do with traitors."

Now, he looked paler than white. "I-I'll do it. Princess. M-Ma'am."

Oh. My. Fucking. God. He almost pissed himself in fear. I rubbed my muzzle tiredly, ignoring the peanut gallery as they stared at us, trying to understand what the fuck was going on. I could tell the General wanted to lay into Eight Bit for being such an embarrassment to the royal guard. He wisely stayed silent lest he invoked my wrath.

I decided to take pity on Eight Bit and, well... probably did the dumbest thing my brain could come up with to entice him into not running away the first chance he got with his tail tucked in between his legs: I gave him hope. "You know what? If you save Equestria with me, you can have sex with me."

That caused him to become instantly hard, much to his embarrassment and the scandalized gasp of everypony else. "W-what? Pleasure, that's not—I don't—T-that's not what I want!"

"You would do what?!" Bulwark exclaimed, popping a blood vessel. Agent Furlong lost his sunglasses as he openly gaped at me, and Agent Sweetie Drops outright fainted.

Wow, you would think none of them knew what I got up to each night. What a shocker.

"Your Highness, you can't—"

"Finish that sentence, and you will find out whether or not I was serious about threatening to send ponies on latrine duty in the Frozen North for the rest of their life, General."

General Bulwark snapped his muzzle shut, looking like he swallowed a sour lemon. That was what I thought.

"Princess, I don't want you to—" Eight Bit opened his muzzle instead, so I shut him up with my glare next.

"You don't want to have sex with me?" I asked him, snorting both in anger and because I hated being lied to by my friends. "Tell that to your fleshy meat pole, Eight Bit. Do you think I'm blind? You've tried getting under my tail for years! And now you're lying to me?!"

"I wanted to date you!" he shot back, indignant (and, much to my surprise, completely honest). "But you kept being weird about it, and Shining agreed to let me try to ask you out first if we helped him with Cadance! I'm sorry if I ruined your chances with him, okay?!"

I felt my chest go numb as I stood there dumbfounded. Shining would have asked me out if the nerd gang hadn't agreed to his stupid idea of wooing Cadance instead? And Eight Bit selfishly agreed to it? I could have shot down Shiny and asked Cadance out myself?!

"I..." I mumbled, trailing off. Fuck. I was an idiot. And I even helped him by making him sound nice, playing right into his hooves. I made him popular practically overnight. Cadance fell for him because I set him up for success.

"I didn't know you were that into him, Pleasure—P-Princess, I mean," Eight Bit continued, oblivious to my inner turmoil. "You always pushed back and outright denied wanting to have a special somepony, so... we just assumed you were lesbian or something. Then Shining Armor finds out you were talking about dating and stuff, but you clearly must've had a different type than nerdy stallions—which, by the way, are the most considerate guys a girl can date. At least we have a personality worth loving and the smarts most 'cool' guys lack."

I looked away, unable to meet his eyes as he laid his feelings bare to me. It was interesting to note, though, that his ears flicked at the mention of nerdy 'guys' while he referred to himself. Odd. It wasn't the first time it happened, but now it stood out to me. "Eight Bit, I..." I began, frustrated not only with him but also with myself. "I'm not that kind of gal. I don't do romantic shit. I like having fun, that's it."

"If that were the case, then why do you keep rejecting me?" he challenged me, and I flinched. "I'm no Shining Armor, I get it. But... if we're going to do this... let's go on a date—a single date—and if you don't want to repeat it, that's fine. At least I know I tried."

"Fine," I muttered, sagging. "One date. If you manage to impress me,"—I swallowed thickly—" you may court me."

"I promise I won't disappoint you, Princess," Eight Bit said, mistaking my numb expression as skepticism. Perhaps it was; I couldn't tell myself. I didn't feel anything, to be honest. I wasn't sad, I wasn't angry, I wasn't hurt. I didn't feel despair, remorse, or regret. I was just numb, watching myself move as if being marionetted by somepony else.

I had to move on from Cadance eventually, right? I could do it now. I didn't care with whom it was; I just wanted to fill this stupid void in my heart. Eight Bit was a nice enough guy; I could settle for him.

Everything was fine. I was fine.

A single, lone tear rolled down my cheek, unnoticed by everyone as I turned away.