Humanitys Last Stand Against Harmony

Previously. "Why, we are here to put this poor race out it's misery." said Princess Celestia. Oh why the fuck me?

Chapter three: 0.5 Hours after ponies arrived.

I stared at her in disbelief. The kindest, most wise and graceful pony to ever trot the cartoon world, was on earth to kill everyone. And she sounded like it was just another chore. "Y-You can be serious! You... But... well... Why?" She looked at me like I was a simpleton for not understanding.

"Your race has been suffering because of wars you rage at each other, simply because of skin colour and money, You poor creatures have done nothing for your planet but ruined it with smoke and plastic. The human race will just kill it self eventually, so instead so a slow death for every soul, I will give them all a quick, merciful death instead." When she finished my face must have been pretty epic, because she took a step back away from me when she looked down.

It was about then they noticed my T-shirt, because Fluttershy took an interest in it. "U-umm, excuse me m-Mr deadly alien, why do you have a picture of me on your shirt?" At the time I had complete forgotten about the shirt. Maybe I could use it to save my ass again, and maybe save the world at the same time!

"I wear your face, Fluttershy, because you are symbol of peace and happiness through out the human world. That, and your the cutest thing to ever exist." I couldn't stop there. I had to drive it home that we weren't as bad as they say we were.

"We also use it to learn, hoping that your kindness will rub off one us so we can better ourselves. The same goes for the other elements. We hope that if we bring them close to your hearts we can become happy. You see, humanity may be somewhat evil and kills everything but we also try to better ourselves so that doesn't happen. After each war we learn from the mistakes the people who started those wars made, thus making a better humanity." Happy I had proven my point I looked at each of the ponies, smiling at myself for a job well done.

All they did was laugh. "That *giggle* is the most *snort* ridiculous thing I have ever heard! Learning from war? Yea right!" snorted twilight. I couldn't believe it. Even the smartest pony in all of Equestria thought I was bullshit. I knew then that talking these pony's out the slaughter wasn't going to happen. "Humans are also very clever and evil it seems. A better reason to kill them all as quickly as possible. My bottom jaw was hitting my ankles, swinging in the breeze.

"Now princess, let me begin the cleansing." A smile appeared on her face as her horn started to spark, her hooves slowly making her way towards me. I knew that if I didn't fight for my world, no one would.

I picked up the cake from the table, which pinkie gave an annoyed "Hey!' to, and threw it right in Twilights face; knocking out her magic. I leaped  over her and went right out the flaps. I wasted no time finding the nearest house and making a beeline for it. The Princess stepped out, shouting "Stop him!" to her guards, beginning the great chase.

Chapter 4: 1 Hour since ponies arrived.

I shouldered the door down to the house and ran through a few rooms with the pegasi guards hot on my heels. Luckily, humans houses didn't have doors that wide, giving a huge advantage. After messing around through the rooms a broke out into the back. I ran right through the back yard and jumped the fence into the next backyard and into the next house.

The unicorns were now also giving chase and they teleported to the front door of the house, blocking my way. Turning I saw the pegasi were now covering the back door. With no other choice I dived through the door to my right, which happened to be the cellar. Taking a tumble down the stairs, I quickly got back up the stairs and shut the door in the ponies faces. I locked all the locks I could and placed a few heavy boxes in the way. The ponies on the other side started the thud the door. Since the unicorns didn't know what the other side looked like they couldn't teleport in here.

I began searching for a window or a door I could escape by, but no luck. I went through the draws, hoping to find a carrot or something to bribe them with. What I found... was a shotgun. A M1014, with a strap to put the bullets in that I could hang over my arm. Whoever's  house this was, they were ready for a zombie invasion. I didn't have choice so I grabbed it and swung the strap over my shoulder.

I took a stance looking at the door, which was close to breaking and gave them a warning. "Don't come in here! You will die if you do and I don't want to kill you!" They just sniggered before slamming into the door one more time, knocking it down. A cocky pegasus walked right in, sure that this was going to be a breeze. Instead he got a breeze full of pellets. His entire face was gone in an instance, spraying anything behind him with bits of skull, blood, and brains.

The poor guys body slumped and rolled down the stairs, stopping at my feet. A unicorn then peeked around the door, his horn ready to blast something my way. I fired another shot, blowing his head on the wall as well. All sounds after that were of those of panic, lots of thumping, then silence.

I had just killed ponies! And there was no doubt more coming.