Crimson clouds rolled around me, and with a gesture, they parted like a curtain granting me a view of the capital city that had so foolishly refused my demands of tribute. With a thought, a bolt of red lightning struck the tallest tower of the castle in the center of town. An explosion bloomed from the point of contact, and flaming motes went spiraling out, catching thatched roofs on fire. A cry of terror rang out and the populace scattered like ants in fear of me.

"I see you!" I bellowed as my flying mount circled above the smoldering city. I jabbed a finger at one of the fleeing townsfolk below. "ZAP!" A bolt of lightning flew from my fingertip and turned the hapless peasant to ash. I cackled and stood up in the stirrups of my saddle.

"Cower, you fools!" I roared, thrusting my hands out. "Victor Fremont has come! Bow before me or be destroyed!" The peasants froze and looked up at me in fear before sharing a look and slowly crawling to their knees and bowing in unison. I smirked and shook my fist.

"Perfect! Once more!"

Beep beep beep beep.

I blinked and snorted, scanning the ceiling above my bed and then looking over at the screeching and blinking clock on the little table beside my head. Slowly, my mind caught up with my waking body, and with it came memory of reality.

Especially the fact that I wasn't an evil wizard.

"Aw, man," I sighed. With a grunt, I threw my legs over and sat up. I smacked my clock to shut it up and rubbed my eyes before slipping on my glasses. As I blinked and adjusted to the waking world, I glanced at my clock again. Still two hours before I needed to head to work. I could sleep in a little more.

Or.

I looked across my bedroom at my TV stand, where my DVD player sat unplugged, and my copy of Fellowship of the Ring lay. I might not be able to hurl magic in real life, but for a little while, I could indulge in the next best thing.

Yeah, I'm going with 'or' this morning. I slid to my feet and grabbed the remote off my nightstand. Clicking the TV on as I approached I paused at what came on.

The pony show.

The magic purple unicorn and her friends were scurrying up to some kind of hedge maze before a weird lanky mishmash.. thing popped up.

I scowled and quickly changed the channel to AV. Never would I ever spend thirty minutes on that program. My bud Jeremy had told me the show was fine, and I certainly believed him.

But this was personal, and some wounds never heal. Grunting, I unwound the cords from my DVD player and hooked it up.

The way was barred, and my adversaries were nearly upon me. Glancing back over my robed shoulder, I sneered at the line of foes rolling my way. Their armored shells rattled and poisonous fumes followed them in thin streaks. Returning my attention to the glowing red arcane ward blocking my exodus, I thrust a hand towards it.

"Change!" I hissed, reaching out with my will and summoning up but a fraction of my vast, eldritch power. Nothing happened for a moment, but then, to my immense satisfaction, the glassy device shifted green, permitting me to escape. I smirked and relaxed in my seat. Until I glanced to the side and saw the cop sitting in the lane next to me watching me make an ass of myself.

I felt blood rush to my face and then jumped as the first car in the line behind me caught up and laid into its horn. The cop visibly laughed as I drove off. Thank God the sheer number of people on this planet meant I'd never see him again.

Just a few minutes later, I pulled into the university employee parking lot. I checked my watch and saw that I was still fifteen minutes early. I snapped my fingers. God, I was good. Reaching over and grabbing my lunch bag, I swept my car door open and made my way inside.

The lot was unusually quiet this morning, but that just meant the chances of nothing urgent happening inside were higher than average. I reached into my back pants pocket and pulled out my ID just as I reached the door. I swept it over the scanner which beeped in response and unlocked the door.

As I pushed inside and scanned the hall within, I spotted a familiar balding figure in an argyle sweater vest standing with an annoyed look while studying his clipboard and leaning into the earpiece by which he received calls from all across campus.

"Mornin' Mr. Crane," I said as I approached. He jolted and whirled around, nearly dropping his clipboard as he did. His expression softened as soon as he saw me.

"Ah, Vic! Great timing," he desperately replied in his sharp nasal voice. He pointed with his clipboard down the hall. "There's a big spill in lab fifteen. Nothing toxic, just staining. And the night cleaners didn't bother changing the trash in the third auditorium." I huffed and nodded.

"Straight into it today, huh? On my way," I replied and hurried to the supply room.

I pushed the door open with my back and peered over my shoulder, spotting both the spill in question and the two who'd probably called it in. Will and Jake, a chemistry team who.. Funny, I wasn't sure what they really did here. I also wasn't really sure if Jake was qualified to be working with the kinds of chemicals they had on that table. He was dressed in the same ratty hoodie and loose jeans he always wore and still had that dopey, anxious look on his face.

Will at least looked ready, dressed in a yellow jumpsuit with a gas mask resting on his shaven head. He turned from Jake to leer at me annoyedly before jutting an open hand at the spill across the room.

"Thank you. Victor," he said curtly before shaking his head and whispering something to Jake, who scratched his chin and nodded.

"What'cha cooking today, boys?" I chirped as I rolled my cart into position. Jake glanced up and smirked.
"A real game changer, that's what," he said with a low chuckle.

"Just- just stay over there, Victor. Thanks," Will demanded with a raised hand. I shrugged and went about my work, taking my mop and bucket off the cart before spraying the thick puddle of blue whatever it was. Mr. Crane had said the stuff wasn't toxic, so my multipurpose cleaner shouldn't have had any wacky interactions.

Noticing there were pieces of a broken beaker in the puddle, I donned gloves, crouched, and carefully picked the larger bits out before-

"Psst! Hey!" I stood up and looked over at Will and Jake who were carefully measuring some reddish powder in a small dish.

"What's up?" I called. They both glanced up at me. We stared at each other for a moment before Will shook his head expectantly. I furrowed my brow, at which he rolled his eyes and they returned to their work. I followed suit and collected the last of the glass.

"Hey!" I shot up again and glared at the two chemists. Neither paid me any mind as Will glanced at his partner before snatching a bottle out of his hand and quietly reprimanding him. "Over here, you idiot!" I blinked and turned. The rest of the lab was empty.

"Down here! In the puddle!" I blinked again and looked down at the puddle. Slowly, I crouched again and stared at the fluid. All I saw was my reflection. Same brown hair and faint stubble, glasses, and weird jumbled dragon tattoo.

Oh. That's new.

"Hello," the tattoo greeted before slithering around and off of my face.

"What?" I quietly replied, watching the figure stroke its beard and stare back at me.

"Hm, a bit scrawnier than usual, but you'll do, all things considered," it muttered before bowing. "Allow me to introduce myself! I am Discord, Spirit of Chaos, and if you will allow, your humble patron." I stared blankly at the figure in the puddle. My brain finally caught up and gave me the realization that the figure was a completely different color from the fluid it appeared in. While my reflection was a dark blue like the puddle, this thing was more natural.

Well, about as natural as it could be. But, something about this thing was familiar. Very familiar. Where had I seen- WAIT.

"You're from that pony show," I quietly hissed, jabbing my finger at the puddle. Without a doubt, he was the same mishmashed thing I'd seen on the TV today. He recoiled and blinked before smirking.

"I believe so, yes. Ain't interdimensional overlap fun? Leads to creative types coming up with all kinds of wild-"

"Fuck you, man! Your show killed 'Dan Vs.'!" I snarled. He recoiled again and frowned.

"Pardon?"

"Fuckin' loved that show," I huffed. The snake thing rolled his eyes before grunting.

"Will you just listen? I have limited-"

"Course that just confirms I'm hallucinating," I added, scanning the glossy image. "And the stuff I'm cleaning here really is toxic." He paused and glared at me for a moment.

"No one calls Discord a mere trick of the mind. Not when he's actually gracing them with his presence, anyhow," he spat with a sinister look in his eyes, just before his expression shifted to smug. "I might not be there physically, but your world has enough uncertainty running through it that I can work my magic. Like this." His eyes flashed briefly, and I raised an eyebrow.

"Huh," I heard off to the side. "Never seen it turn that color before." I looked up to see Will and Jake recoiling from one of the beakers at their station. Will scowled and snatched a bottle from Jake's hand. He scanned it for a moment before rolling his head with exasperation.

"You added two and a half milliliters, not two, you idiot," he spat, jabbing the bottle at Jake, who blinked and turned to him.

"S'at bad?" He murmured. Then, the beaker exploded, unleashing a pure white cloud of smoke that quickly began filling the room.

I quietly sat, munching on the sandwich I'd prepared for lunch and staring at the 'Spirit of Chaos' leering back at me in the glass window across from where I sat. Just passed him, I could see the firefighters, police cruisers, and fucking unmarked black vans that had the building surrounded. I looked to the side and down the hall to the main foyer where teams of guys in suits were stomping about.

Suddenly, Mr. Crane passed into the hall and approached with an exasperated look. I swallowed my mouthful as he plopped onto the bench next to me.

"That gas must've been pretty serious for them to get the feds in here," I huffed. "Any sign of Will or Jake?"

"None. They're going to be sending an officer over in a minute for a statement from me," he huffed before dragging his hand over his face and head. "Apparently, those two were preparing drugs."

"You serious?" I huffed, shaking my head in bewilderment. "How the heck did they even get in here?"

"You got me!" Mr. Crane squawked. "Three whole months they were using our equipment!" He leaned forward onto his knees and pointed at me.

"You're lucky you were crouched so low when their concoction blew up!" He declared.

"You're telling me," I responded, shaking my head. A whistle split the air down the hall. One of the feds was waving down at us. Mr. Crane sighed and stood up, patting me on the shoulder before he turned and left. I turned my attention forward to the window, where the so-called spirit was leering at me, occasionally checking an oversized sundial on his wrist. I finished my sandwich before standing up and approaching the window.

"So," I began after a moment.

"So," he replied, resting his chin on his lion paw. "You ready to listen? I am still on limited time here." I smacked my lips and sighed.

"Shoot," I replied and waved my hand. He snorted but stood up straight.

"Mr. Fremont, I've chosen you to offer a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity," he began, bowing with a sweep of his arm. He glanced up at me with a curious look in his eye. "Something I know for a fact you'll love." I smirked and rolled my eyes before folding my arms.

"Oh yeah? And what-"

"Magic, of course." I paused before rolling my eyes again.

"Damn, you're good," I leaned against the glass. "So what? You offering?"

"But of course!" He replied with another bow.

"In exchange for what?" I pressed, inspecting my nails. He laughed in response.

"Oh-hoh! I do so enjoy when mortals know they're being manipulated," he pressed against the glass with his paw and claw spread out. "It's simple. I grant you the magic you desire, and you let me bring you through to my world." He looked me up and down with one eye and a manic gleam.

"Why?"

"Does it matter?"

"Kinda does." He withdrew and gave a thoughtful hum.

"Well, in that case, let's just say it's for my amusement, hm?" He gave a hopeful smile. I nodded with pursed lips.

"Let's just say I'm not interested unless you talk straight." His face sagged and he groaned.

"Oh, come on, now," he groused. I backed up and shook my head before looking off down the hall.

"Nah, I-" My jaw hung slack and my breath hitched.

"What?" Discord asked, leaning against the glass to try and see.

Can't be.

Ain't no way.

There, at the end of the hall, talking with Mr. Crane, was the cop from earlier. While he was writing down Mr. Crane's account, he slowly looked up and saw me. He smirked at Mr. Crane and pointed my way, asking him something. Mr. Crane looked my way as well and nodded before gesturing back to the whole space they were in. The cop's smile widened and he slowly nodded before saying something else.

Mr. Crane nodded back and turned to me. "Vic! Come over here!" My jaw clenched and I glanced at the cop, who was watching me with an expectant smirk.

I turned back to the glass and leaned against it with both hands. "I accept. Get me out of here. Now."

Discord blinked and looked off to the side where Mr. Crane and the cop were before shrugging. "Works for me. Hang on!" He raised one claw and snapped his talons. I was blinded as a dazzling light erupted from the point his talons touched each other. When my sight returned, I noticed several things had changed.

First off, I was in a small clearing in a dense, humid forest.

Second, I noticed some birds and black butterflies frozen in the air around me.

Third, I noticed Discord, in the flesh, and looming over me.

"Welcome to Equus, Mr. Fremont," he said with a grin.

"Uh-"

"Hold that thought," he said swiping his claws across my head. He grabbed my hands and placed a limp noodle with the words I was about to say written on it. "We need to get you acclimated to your new environment first."

I glanced at the end of the noddle, which read 'What?' As I did, he pressed the tip of his talon into my forehead. With a twist of his wrist, he snapped back and smirked. Before I could say anything, I was nailed by a whole mess of sensations.
I groaned hard and screwed my eyes shut before folding over and falling to my hands and knees. My skin was tingling like my entire body had fallen asleep all at once and my stomach was doing backflips. To make matters worse, my head was throbbing and my teeth were all aching. I curled into a tight ball and moaned in misery as the sensation rolled all over me.

"Don't worry, Mr. Fremont. It'll be over in a moment, and what you'll be left with will surely make up for it," Discord declared, firmly patting me on the back which only intensified the discomfort. Despite how desperately I wanted to tell him off, sure enough, the pain subsided after a few seconds.

In fact, it vanished so suddenly, I barely remembered how bad it had felt. I panted and mumbled as relief filled my being in its wake, and slowly I flopped onto my side.

"Holy shit," I huffed.

"Indeed, but wait till you see this," Discord replied. I opened my eyes to glare at him but was instead stunned by the change that had taken over the glade around us. Everything was suddenly more vibrant and colorful. The air was also cleaner and had a pleasant, almost sweet smell to it. I slowly sat up and scanned the forest around us.

"What the hell happened?" I asked.

"Your body has adapted to the sudden influx of magic, is all," he replied, pinching the back of my shirt collar and hoisting me to my feet. "And thanks to me, you also have the ability to channel that magic." I looked at him for a moment before realizing what he was saying. I looked down at my hands and blinked as there was definitely some kind of faint light moving along my veins. And as I focused on that light, I could feel the power it carried with it.

"You mean," I quietly pressed. He nodded.

"That's right, Mr. Fremont. Genuine magical power, right at the tips of your-" I cut him off with a triumphant laugh.

"Awesome! How I do?" I demanded, eagerly wiggling my fingers and scanning the glade for something to explode. He raised an eyebrow and held up a thin booklet that he studied for a moment.

"It looks like you just need to memorize one of these, which includes the means for releasing the spell itself," he replied before handing the booklet to me. I snatched it up and scanned the page which was full of weird shapes and letters that almost seemed to shift around the page. Before I could complain though, a few of them lined up and I was able to make sense of it all.

"Oh my God, magic missile," I huffed.

"Good choice," Discord quietly chortled. I narrowed my eyes and focused on the line of symbols, but couldn't help but notice some of the others were still blurry and mobile.

"Why can't I read all of these?" I asked, flipping a few pages to find more illegible script.

"Your simple mortal brain isn't accustomed to the arcane enough yet," he replied, reclining in the air and checking his wrist-mounted sundial with a mildly anxious look. "As you improve, the rest should be clear. But will you just pick one and-"

"Yeah, yeah, got it. Alright!" I clamped the book shut and scanned the woods around us. Spying a single tree out of the rest, I grinned and raised my hand. I focused on the spell I had in mind and watched the symbols associated with it faintly appear and float around my hand. Then, all at once and with a little mental nudge, they leaped into my palm, and an arrow of silvery-blue light appeared. The magic missile shot out and nailed the tree with a squeal like a firework followed by a bang.

I cackled with delight as a chunk of the tree was blown clean off. "Hell yeah!"

"Good show," Discord declared, clapping his talons.

"I'mma do it again!" I thrust my hand forward and focused, only for nothing to happen. I paused and blinked before trying again. Again, nothing happened.

"Ah! Apologies, I forgot," Discord snorted, snatching up the booklet from my hands. He flipped through it before nodding and returning it to me, tapping one paragraph in particular. I furrowed my brow and read the passage before blanching.

"I have to memorize them as many times as I want to cast them?"

"Bingo. Keep reading," he snickered. Doing as he instructed, I felt my blood chill and I couldn't help but slowly look up at the tree I'd blasted.

"Only one per day?" I squeaked.

"At your level, yes."

"Buh?"

"So, be sure to practice! Next is two spells per day, you lucky dog!" Discord said before falling into a series of wheezing cackles. I was faintly aware as he slid the booklet and a few others into my arms.

"Buh?"

"Anyhow, the rest of the details are in these. I recommend you read them all," he declared, patting me on the back. "Or don't. I'm not your dad." I slowly looked up at him. He looked back at me with a cool, self-satisfied grin.

"Hwa?"

"What I would also encourage you to do is consider relocating," he firmly grabbed my head and turned it before cupping behind my ear. "Hear that?" I froze as I could now hear faint howling in the distance.

"What's that?" I murmured. I was nearly toppled over as he pressed his face into the side of my head.

"Local wildlife. I'm all out of time you see, so my spell for slowing down time is running out, and they have picked up your scent," he chortled. My eyes widened as he withdrew. "Not mine though, since I'm not really here. I'm in the process of being turned to stone. Again." I frowned and looked at him in bewilderment only for him to nod sagely.

"Yes, sadly, this is the end for yours truly," he draped his arm over his eyes. "Once again, the brilliant artist is stifled by the cruel acts of the willfully ignorant and tasteless!"

"I-"

"No no!" He silenced me, clapping his paw against my face and clenching his claws against his chest. "Do not weep for me! But remember me, always, and create in my stead!" He withdrew his paw and slithered into the air. I slowly reached after him, accidentally dropping my booklets as I did.

"Wait-"

"Farewell, my beloved apprentice! And good luck," he blew a kiss at me as he slowly broke apart into flower petals. "Know that I am with you always." And with that, he was gone. The petals he turned into fluttered on the wind and vanished into the trees. My jaw hung slack and I scanned the air he had just been in.

Slowly, my eyes fell to the ground and I retrieved my booklets. There were seven of them in total, and while they once had titles, those had been crudely marked out with heavy black ink. The art on each cover was still intact, but that was of absolutely no comfort to me.

"Fuck," I finally gasped. Just then, something snapped in the bushes nearby and I jumped. Scanning the woodland around me, I saw nothing. However, the howling I'd heard previously had grown louder. Closer. "Fuck."

I tightly gripped the booklets and took off as fast as my legs could carry me.

Author's Note