She vowed that errypone would get fanum tax mad lit. Reluctantly, the hot sister rizzed the most powerful magic ever known: the Grimace of Harmony. Using the magic, she mom dommed her sussy sister, and ban hammered her permanently on Reddit. The hotty took on rizzponsibility for the both of them...

Twilight yapped, "...sun and moon... and harmony has been yapped about in Equestribidi ever since. Hmm... Grimace of Harmony. That's totally delulu... I think it was made out of paper, and it didn't even look like blue raspberries at all."

"There you are, Twilight! Moon Flanker is raving at a little get-together in westside castle courtyard. Be a goat and join us!"

"Oh," Twilight said with negative aura. "S-sorry, chuds... I've got a lot of lore to catch up on."

Twinklesuss sighed as Twilight ratio'd. "Does she do anything except drip? I think she's more interested in bussin' than doxxin'."

"Bet."

Twilight mewed along, and voiced to herself, "I just kno I've heard of the Grimace of Harmony."

She mewed all the way up the stairs, and into her room and slammed the door in Spike's face. "Ow!"

"Spike! I'm being deadass rn... Spike?"

The goated dragon groaned.

"There you are," Twilight said. "Quick, rizz me that old copy of Predictions and Propyeetcies." She saw the once based gift that was smashed right through his face. "What's that for?"

Spike fessed up, "Well, I'm simping for Moondancer pretty hard rn fr."

She rolled her eyes like a boss, and posted on chat while sifting through her books, "Oh, Spike, you kno we don't have any thots for that sort of thing."

"Bet."

Twilight became agro, and used her powers to search more thoroughly. "Nope, nope, nope... nope, nope, nope! Ugh, Spike!"

"It's over here! Calm your crotchtits." He pulled it out from the top shelf.

She rushed over, and exclaimed, "Ah!" She then rizzed the book for its loot of edge. Knowledge, that is. "Grimace, Grimace, G, G, G, G... Aha! Grimace of Harmony... See Mare in the Moon?"

"Mare in the Moon? But that's just an old prime pone tale."

She kept mewing over the book, "Mare, mare... aha! The Mare in the Moon, lore from olden pone times. A powerful pone who wanted to bake Equestria, defeated by the Grimace of Harmony and woke on the moon. She never even got a grimace shake! Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her bop escape, and she will bring about eternal raves!" She gasped and yapped, "Spike! Again, I am being DEAD. ASS. Do you kno what this means?"

Spike had been trying to clean up Twilight's room, and from high atop a latter, he said, "No— whoa!"

He fell, but luckily and like a boss, Twilight was there to goon him.

He made an L-take by still being all like, "Ow!"

"Rizz a note please, to the Princesuss."

"Word," he said.

"My dankest teacher, my continuing study of pone lore have led me to discover that we are on the precipice of disaster!

"Hold on. Preci... preci..."

"Edge."

"Ed... Edje?"

"Uh, you cannot really be dripping this hard rn, are you? Ugh, that something really sus is about to happen! For you see, the mythical Mare in the Moon is in fact Mog-mare Moon, and she's about to return to Equestribidi, and bring with her eternal raves! Something must be done to make sure this delulu propyeetcy does not come true. I await your bop response. Your gyatt student, Twilight Sparkle."

"Twi... light Spar... kle. It's in 4k!"

"F in chat! Send it."

"Now?"

"Deadass."

"Uh, I dunno, Twilight." He yapped right in her ear, "Princesuss Swaglestia's being a straight gangsta rn getting ready for the SSC. And it's like, the day after tomorrow."

"That's just it, Spike. The day after tomorrow is the thousandth year of the Summer Sun Celebration!"

"You should say it like SSC. It's, like way faster."

"From where I'm looksmaxxing, the Princesuss needs to be told right away!"

"Looksmah... Looksmaxx...?"

"It's GOAT!"

"Whoa!" He fell backwards just like the femboy he was, and then got back up to tell Twilight, "Okay, okay!" He sent it, and said, "There, it's on its way. But on Gods, Twilight, I wouldn't hold your breath..."

"Oh, I'm not worried, Spike." Twilight beamed proudly, "The Princesuss trusts me completely. In all the years she's been my dommy she's never once got me down."

Spike burped, "blech!"

"See? I knew she would want to yap about this."

Spike cleared his throat while lightly beating his sore chest, and then Twilight read, "My dankety, most faithy subscriber on Patreon, Twilight the Sparkle. You kno that I value your sigma ways and on Gods I trust you... but you simply must stop simping for me on those dusty old posts on Twitter!"

Twilight gasped. "How'd she kno that was me?"

A pegasussy pulled a chariot higher than a kite in the sky, and while on their way, Spike yapped on, "My dear Twilight, there is more to a pone's life than just grinding for an uber eats order. So, I'm gonna need you to get out, and go touch some grass for once. Poneville's got some chill af pones, and they're all subscribers of mine. The SCC... That's how she actually spelled it, Twi," Spike pointed out.

"Of course she did..."

He continued, "Will be held there, so go make friends, stay up late, and whatever you do... stop being so cheugy."

Twilight once again gasped. "I... am not being cheugy! It actually says that, Spike?" He showed her, and she flexed, "Just... keep mewing, Spike..."

"That's it, and she says she leaves it in your hooves... Look at the goon side! The Princesuss arranged for you to crash in a library! Doesn't that make you Gucci?"

She gave that some thot for a moment, and then yapped, "Yes! Yes it does. You kno why? Because I'm from Ohio!"

Author's Note