Twelve Ounces of Absurdity

Sweetie Belle cheerfully trotted into the room. “Hiya Rarity! Guess what—”

“Shut up.”

“But I—”

Rarity turned away from her. “No. I despise you. You’re a little nothing, a speck.”

“Something cool—”

“A speck.”

“I got legs—”

“Do you know what I do to specks messing up my clean boutique?”

The filly scratched her head. “Um...you give them ice cream and a new toy?”

“No.” Waving her forelegs, Rarity chanted, “Alegba oggway shan-go!”

Sweetie tilted her head. “...What does that mean?”

“Voodoo.”

“Oh.”

The older unicorn smirked, rubbing her hooves together deviously. “It’s the dark arts. Over the course of this week, you will very slowly and painfully mutate into a repulsive jellyfish creature, doomed to live out the rest of your pitiful existence in exile.”

“Oh. Can jellyfish eat ice cream?”

“No, and if you try, I will lock you in the shed again.” The mare scowled.

“...I think I’m gonna go play with my friends again.”

Rarity perked up at that, all smiles. “Bye then, darling! Don’t forget to tell Scootaloo she’s next!”