Introducing the Main Character!
author note: i hope u guiz injoy! dis storee iz nawt 4 prepz! if ur a prep den gtfo! ((This is the actual author. I hope you enjoy this tale of terribleness. I can already feel my brain cells dying.))
mai naem iz Black Sun n im a red n blak alicorn. dis iz da stori of hao i bcame da 7th element uf harmoni n saevd equetra.
i am da secrt dahter uf Celestia n Luna. i wuz born durng a soler iclise n nither Celesta or Loona new i wuz born. i wuz sent 2 da dungon 4 mai childhood wer i lernd that i wuz a vampony. i kild evri1 in da dungen n i wuz den exild 2 poni ville. i her uf 6 gurlz in town ho saevd equestra mani timez n i wnt 2 go meet dem.
i wnt 2 dem n i sed "hi" n dey sed "hi" n i sed "hru" and dey sed "gud n u?" n i sed i wuz gud. i den pounced on da rainbw 1 cuz she wuz meen n i sukd her blud. da othr gurlz did nuthin but watched with aw. i den stopd suking. da rainbw 1 wuz stil aliv. dey taught i wuz kewl n dey praised mi. i wuz der nu friend.
((Oh my GOD! I can't even bring myself to write this! That's it, end of Chapter 1. I'm going to do something intelligent now...))
author note: dis iz a gud stori iznt it? itz guna b better. ((UGGGGGGGH! I'm not even 2 chapters in this and I want to stop!))
it wuz a fu mnths sins i bit da ranbw poni n shi grew fngz n a hrn. o her naem iz rainbow dash btw. she bcme a vamponi n shi dyd hr ranbw mane red n black ovr hr ranbow mane n shi chngd hr nema 2 deadly dash.
shi bcme cyoot nao n i wntd 2 hav sx with hr. but dat purpl 1 kept kising her. i dcided 2 bite hr 2 n shi bcme a vamponi 2, groing wigs n her fr chngd 2 blck n hr man chnged 2 red n lite red. shi also bcame cyoot n i wanted 2 hav sex wit her 2. n so i had a 3sum were i gru a rely big ting n i fukd dem n i got dem pregnat n dey hd mai babiz. da purpl 1 bcame nolight sparkless
den i gt 2 no da other gurlz n i bit dem 2. dey all chgnd 2 n i bcame friendz wit a buch of alicrn vamponys. da onli 1 dident chng moar. dat wuz flootershai. i wuz ok wit dis cuz shi wuz kute nyway as shi wuz so i was ok wit dis. shi wuz stil an alicrn but her mane bcme barly drkr n her body becme a drkr yello. shi became flutternotshy.
i wnt up 2 her "flutternotshy ur cute" i sed. "no im not" shi sed. "yes u r" i sed. "ok i am" shi sed. we den bgan 2 maek out n wi had sex. it wuz gud n i got hr pregnet. i had anothr kid n i lovd her moar den da others. "oh ur so cute babi" i sed. "goo da babi sed. "i no rite" i sed. flooternotshy den kisd mi n hld mi close. "i luv u" shi sed. "i luv u 2" shi sed.
wi began 2 have sex agen n den wi wre stopd by our frends, "wut da fuk r u doin u cheetin hore?" dey called.