...and opened up impossibly wide, getting almost all the whipped cream in a single mouthful, humming a song all the while. The cherry on the end of my penis just hit the back of her throat, and she swallowed. The feeling of all the whipped cream rushing past my penis and down her throat was an unusual, but not unpleasant, one. Now that her tongue was touching me directly, her powerful vocal chords were able to deliver pleasurable vibrations through it. She pushed herself forward, until my dick just skimmed her throat, and her teeth touched my skin. It's funny how I never fully appreciated how huge their heads were until one of them tried to deep-throat me.

Her tongue wandered out of her mouth, and lapped up some of the whipped cream that was currently running down my balls.

"Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..." She murmured, my head still halfway down her throat. I had always thought Pinkie's voice sounded a little annoying, but I have just learned that it feels really, really, good. She pulled away, mouth lined with whipped cream, and a strand of drool still connecting her lips to my penis.

She climbed up a little higher, and squirted chocolate syrup all over my chest, before bending down to lick it. I couldn't help but notice that a certain blue pegasus was shifting uncomfortably at the sight of that, wings at full extension; Pinkie was essentially lapping up what remained of Dashie's cum from my body.

Then, suddenly, chocolate syrup found itself all over my face. I was able to shut my eyes just in time, but it seemed as though nothing would save me from Pinkie's big, warm tongue relentlessly scraping across my nose, eyes, and mouth. A little gross, a little itchy, a little slimy; she pretty much felt like a big, slobbery, dog. Pinkie apparently seemed to be under the impression that every part of my body was an erogenous zone, including my eyelids, which were — unfortunately — stubborn chocolate-traps.

While she molested my face, the lack of eyesight made me a little more sensitive to the way her body felt on top of me. She was ever-so-slightly thicker than Rarity and AJ had been, but much much more bouncy and rubbery, compared to Applejack's chiseled frame and Rarity's rather average-feeling curves. Finally, she decided she was finished with my face. I opened one eye, to make sure all was well, and found her face to be very close to mine, smiling intently with wide eyes.

"Hi!" She shouted, a little too loud.

I thought we were past basic greetings at this point, but I responded in kind. "Um... Hello?"

"You haven't had any treats yet! Would you like to try my muffin?"

Muffin? Yup. Pretty sure I know what that means. "Definitely!"

And then there was a muffin in my mouth. An actual muffin. As in, baked goods.

"I thot yoo ment yer fahjinuh."

"No, silly, I call that my cupcake! Muffins don't have frosting."

I looked down, and sure enough, it was frosted. White icing with little pink swirls decorating the surface. In retrospect, what else could I have possibly expected?

"It's buttercream! Do you want some?"

You know what, that actually looked pretty damn good. I spat out the muffin and nodded in agreement. She climbed over me, threw her hooves on the wall over my head, and thrust her groin into my face, allowing me to go to town on her in more ways than one. Every once in a while, as I licked away at the icing, slowly uncovering her vagina, I heard the can of whipped cream spray again, apparently directly into her mouth. Damn, she really loves sugar.

"All done?" She asked, glancing down to examine my work.

"Yup," I replied, licking my lips.

"Yipee!" She shouted as she pushed herself off the wall with full force, her ass crash-landing on my balls.

"GAHHH JESUS CHRIST!"

"Haha, what?"

"Ergh..." I groaned, "I mean... ponyfeathers?"

"Oh..." She replied, looking back behind herself to see what went wrong. "OH! Sorry, I missed. Lemme try again!"

What?

Before I could object, she was up against the wall, and launched herself backwards once more. Again, my balls weren't happy. She scooted back to investigate the situation, and prodded at my drooping penis.

"It's not hard anymore..."

Oh, gee, you think? I bet that happened when you crushed my balls the first time. Just wild speculation on my part.

She bent down and took her tongue to it, trying to get it erect. After a little while, the pain in my nuts subsided and she was successful.

"Okie dokie! I think I figured out what the problem is!"

"Probably the height you're starting from. If you'd just—"

"Yup! Definitely not high enough."

"Wait, what? No!"

She was already climbing up onto a bookshelf that was towering over the bed.

"Don't—"

"GERONIMO!!!" she shouted with a giggle, as she cannonballed her way to my crotch. Somehow, she managed to hit it dead on, penetrating herself, and she fortunately didn't break it off. For the first ten milliseconds I thought maybe she had pulled the move off flawlessly. And then her elastic flank-cheek caught up with the rest of her, whipped down rapidly, and slapped me in the nuts again. Twice.

"MOTHERFUCKER!"

"I know, right!"

What?

My conflicted penis put up with the abuse, somehow. That ten-minute break, combined with however long Pinkie had been using me as a food dish, actually did me a world of good; sex was actually totally pleasurable again. She bounced up and down on top of me chaotically for what seemed like forever, giggling like an idiot the entire time, her round-but-perky ass perpetually springing into my thighs and launching her back upwards. After a while, I laid my head down against the pillow, just trying to rest my neck. Before I knew it, her groin was in my face again, and I just kind of reflexively started suckling her clitoris.

It took a little longer than it should have before I realized something kind of important. Her cunt was still wrapped around my dick, and she was still bouncing up and down over my crotch. It was definitely her. Not only did she never get off, but I could feel her unique flank and curly tail brushing up against me all the way on the other end of my body. I tried bringing my head back up to look, but she wouldn't have any of that, she just pushed my head down with one hoof and brought the other to her mouth.

"Shhhhhhhh..."

Her tail brushed to one side, and I was sure I felt the bed shift as more weight bore down on it. Someone was licking my balls. I glanced to the left, and all five of the other ponies were standing there, continuing to watch as though nothing was out of the ordinary. Nopony else came into the room... I feel like I would have noticed ponies hiding... No, this was just Pinkie. This is just something Pinkie does. I'm not even going to try to understand it.

When it was finally time for me to come, the Pinkies handling my lower half just seemed to vanish, and the one riding my face leapt off of me and worked it for the last couple of seconds with her hooves.

I came confetti. I'm not even kidding. Colorful streamers and ribbons shot out of my dick. I'm not even going to ask; it's Pinkie Pie, after all. But if that symptom persists, I'll definitely definitely need both a doctor and a lawyer.

"You hardly smiled the whole time..." She complained, clambering back on top of me and taking me inside herself once more. "We're gonna have to fix that!"

She took a feather to my belly, gently running it along my skin. "Pfft... heh... Hahaha."

I started to squirm, but I didn't get too far, as I was tied to the bed. She mercilessly tickled me, running the feather up along my chest, on my neck, and under my chin. I was capable of doing little more than spasming underneath her and laughing like a psychopath, and she was apparently enjoying my chaotic motions, squeaking and moaning pleasurably. After about twenty seconds, Pinkie gave off an ear-shattering laugh, which I can only assume meant she finished, and bounced off of the bed, happy as always.

"Now that's how Pinkie Pie parties."

...That was weird. Okay. Now it's Twilight's turn. She's got a lot of magic education, so I don't even want to let myself try to figure out all the ways this could go terribly wrong. If I do, I'll probably chicken out and ask to go home.

Wait, she was so into Rainbow... Is she a full-blown lesbian? Is she going to blast me with some kind of rule-63 ray or something? I don't... Hmm... That might actually be kind of interesting. As long as she could change me back at the end...

Oh god, what if she summons a bunch of tentacles to rape me or something?

Damnit. No. Stop thinking about it. You can do this. It can't possibly be any worse than anything the others did.

...Right?

I'm not gonna think about it anymore. ... Why does she want to go last? What is it she's planning to do to me? Does it make me unsex-able? Should I—

"Ready?" She asked. At some point she had put on some reading glasses. Definitely had the hot librarian look going. Man, what is it about librarians?

I laughed anxiously. "So, uh... What's the plan?"

"We're gonna take this upstairs. You look like you could use a bath."

She was quite right. I was soaked through to the core with food products and the feminine excretions of at least three ponies. "Sounds good."

I expected her to untie me and let me walk up the stairs, but that wasn't the way things were going to go. My stomach turned upside down, I very nearly lost my lunch, and I developed extreme vertigo. All I knew was that I was submerged in water, and I panicked, flailing around like an idiot. Once my brain settled, I realized I had just been teleported upstairs, directly into the tub. She just told me that was exactly what she was going to do. I'm a moron.

The pleasantly warm water eased my tense, overworked body. I'd never been much for frilly stuff like bath salts, but whatever was in the water was really helping me relax. I allowed myself to sink into the sublime water, and dunked my head back until only my nostrils projected from the surface. My god. This was amazing. Even being able to spend two minutes in this tub between ponies would have made all the difference in the world.

As I re-emerged from the water, Twilight dipped her hoof into the tub, sampling the temperature, though she must have already known it was perfect. I noticed a couple of mints set on the side of the tub. Okay, sure, my breath probably smells like sugar and Pinkie-vagina. I use my now-unbound hand to grab a mint and toss it into my mouth.

"I didn't know you were a user," Twilight added shyly.

... User? Dafuq did I just put in my mouth? It just tasted like mint.

Twilight climbed into the tub on the opposite side from me. She magically popped the other mint into her mouth, and tilted her head back, taking a deep breath through her nostrils as she did so. When she opened her eyes and looked at me, I couldn't help but notice her pupils were a bit dilated. Ponies do drugs? Twilight does drugs? Oh man, this is weird.

Am I tripping yet?

I glance around the room. Everything still looks normal. Okay, well, I'm in a cartoon world and surrounded by magic ponies, but I saw that already.

Oh, oh, wait, wait, wait, I feel itchy. Is that it? Am I high? Damnit, I don't know about these crazy pony drugs. Oh... Wait. Of course. My dick feels kind of funny. It must be some kind of sex-enhancing drug.

It feels really funny. That can't be right. Is it still there? I shifted my legs to check, and sure enough, there was still something... Correction. There were still things between my legs. Okay. Seriously. I don't want to look, but I need to look. I have to find out what she's done...

Author's Note

Credit for the title of this chapter goes to AnonponyDASHIE.

I seriously had no clue what to call this chapter.