Captain's Travels

The airship dropped anchor just outside of Ponyville's hospital. Neither Captain nor Rainbow rested during the trip to the medical center, the two of them just looked out of the window chatting idly about the weather, or whatever else caught the pair's attention.

"So then fwoosh, I dived down and caught Rarity, and three of the Wonderbolts just before they hit the ground," said Rainbow Dash smugly as the two sat opposite one another.

"I still call bullshit, there's no way you could fly fast enough to break the sound barrier, let alone cause a magical rainbow explosion."

"I guess I'll just have to show you some time. Anyways, it look like were here."

"Come on lets go get checked in so that we can leave," Captain said as he held onto his shoulder.

The man lay strapped to a gurney, thrashing about, attempting to free himself from the restraints that bound him.

"Calm down Captain," said Twilight softly, "it'll all be over soon."

"I swear to God I'm gonna-" *hmph*

  "Please... uh sir, if you had just sat still, we wouldn't have had to strap you down for the x-ray," said a white earth pony mare, with a red cross cutiemark and a light pink mane, as she placed a rubber stopper into his mouth.

"Come on Cap, just sit still for a few minutes."

Giving a resigned snort, the man went limp. Quickly, the two mares ducked behind a lead screen, and a large metallic camera swung out, positioning itself just above Captain's chest. A slow cycling began to build within the machine's casing followed by a small click. Another, and another. The clicks continued until the contraption passed across his feet.

"Aaand done," said the white mare from behind the screen.

"See Captain, that wasn't so bad."

Captain, who was now struggling against his restraints, grunted angrily in response, before Twilight tugged the stopper from his mouth with her magic.

"Now get these damned things off of me before I gnaw my own writs off."

The earth pony undid the straps, which left red marks on the man's writs. As soon as he was free, Captain hopped off of the gurney, and headed for the door.

"The x-rays should be ready in about a day miss," the white mare said to Twilight before the unicorn caught up with the man.

"Come on, lets go check up on everyone else," Captain said as he stifled a yawn.

The man and mare walked side by side, peering into identical rooms, looking for their friends. Wandering around the bleached halls, sparsely decorated with the odd butterfly or woodland creature which failed to relieve the sense of dread the hospital gave off.

"Ugh this stuff's one step above prison food," said a raspy voice in the distance.

"Rainbow," the pair said in unison before heading in the direction of the complaint.

A twist a turn, and a few complaints later, the duo found themselves standing before Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Pinkie Pie, sitting in the cafeteria, each with a tray of wobbly, mushy stuff.

"The hell is that?" asked Captain.

"Food, I think," Pinkie said as she prodded the gelatinous mass with a bandaged hoof.

All of them, in fact, had been covered in bandages. Pinkie had a thick layer around her injured leg, Applejack had srveral small bandages along her hind legs and back, and Rainbow had her wings wrapped in gauze. Twilight too had a few cotton pads held firmly in place across her back, and even Captain had had his bindings changed.

"You want some?" asked the pink mare enthusiastically.

The man grimaced, but took the blob in his hand, gave it an experimental lick, and found that it was indeed food. Maybe.

"So uh, where's Rarity and Fluttershy?" Captain asked the group.

"Ah think they're still sleepin'," replied AJ, "we kin go check up on 'em if ya want."

"Let's wait until they wake up, then we can give them the bad news."

An hour, and several piles of food later, a nurse informed the group that Rarity appeared to be waking up. The five of them raced up stairs, Pinkie and Rainbow jostling for first place. Just as a pink hoof neared the door to tap on the wooden surface, an ear-splitting shriek rang out. Pinkie threw the door open, and began to growl at the unforseen threat.

"Rarity, what's wrong?" shouted Rainbow.

"My-my-my," was all that the white mare could stutter as she looked at her abdomen.

As the group approached, Rarity finally took note of them, and pulled the crisp, white sheets up over her head, and buried her face into her pillow.

"Don't look at me, I'm hideous," she wailled as she sniffed repeatedly.

"Rar-"

"Ple-"

"Sto-"

"Jus-"

Everyone who tried to speak, got cut off by Rarity's ever escalating wails of pain. This continued until Captain stepped up to the bed, grabbed the sheets above the mare's head, and with a swift yank, pulled them free of her vice-like grip. The man looked into the pony's eyes, and flicked her in the forehead with a finger.

"Ow, what was that for?" she asked, visibly hurt.

"Stop," he said sternly, "I have plenty of experience with these things, and I can assure you that you are going to be fine. Look," the man said as he thrusted his forearm in front of her muzzle. There Rarity saw dozens of tiny scratches littering his arm, and a few larger ones centered around his hand. "These look fairly shallow," Captain pointed at the bright red lines on her stomach, "with any luck they'll fade with time, or hell you guys might already have some sort of crazy scar removal magic thing. Quit worrying about it so much, I've gotten worse, on my way to work."

"But look at me, I won't be able to show my face around Ponyville without being gawked at."

"Well this seems like an excellent opportunity to promote your boutique by wearing outfits more often." Pointed out Twilight.

"Hm, well I suppose I could on some slightly less revealing clothing. Oh perhaps I could make a clothing line especially for ponies who would like to divert attention from certain areas." Rarity continued pondering as she floated a stick of charcoal and a sketch pad to herself, and began to furiously scribble on the paper. "Now all of you shoo, the creative process takes time." With that, her visitors departed.

An hour of wandering later, Captain took his leave, and left the mares to chat in the hospital's courtyard. A few minutes later, and the man was standing in his room, immaculate and sterile, plain white sheets laying crisply on the bed. With a resigned sigh and a yawn, the sailor slipped beneath the sheets, and into a deep sleep.

Captain sat on a blanket, under the shade of a gnarled old tree, with a small ice chest at his side, as he watched the world pass by. Birds chirped softly in the distance, and a brisk breeze blew past. On the horizon, moutains scrapped the sky, and broke fat, rain filled clouds. A small concrete village made its home between the peaks.

"A happy locale is see," Luna said as she stepped out from behind a tree.

"Believe it or not, this is the place where my dad grew up. Still kind of a prick though," Captain replied with a chuckle. "Coke?" he asked as he stuck his hand into the ice chest.

"What is it?" The lunar princess acked hesitantly.

"A soft drink, don't worry it won't bite, unless you want it to of course."

"I'd prefer it didn't." The man tossed her a plastic bottle, filled with a bubbling brown liquid, and sporting a bright red lable.

"How's life?" the man asked as he opened his own bottle, and took a swig.

"If you mean the current state of affairs across the whole of Equestria, then the situation is poor," Luna said as she struggled with the bottlecap. "If you were wondering about me in particular, then the outlook is even worse."

"Why is that?" Captain asked as he took another draft.

"Between having to calm everypony who knows about the storm, and then helping them face their nightmares, there is only so much one mare can do even if she is a princess, and my guards can only do so much in quelling the nightmares spawned from negative emotions of the populace." The princess of the night grunted as she attempted to bite the cap of the bottle. "I fear that if this keeps up, we may have another 'incident'."

"But that's not going to happen because..."

"Because," the mare began as she thrust the bottle back at the man, "this time around, I have friends around to help me deal with these things. So fear not about having to do battle with Nightmare Moon."

"It's a twist top," Captain mumbled softly as he handed the bottle back to Luna. "Well that's good, I don't think I'd be able to live through that fight."

"Now tell me, have you made any progress in your quest for the jewel?" the princess asked as she took a drink, and smiled pleasantly.

"About that," the man said as he rubbed the back of his head, "we're sort of, maybe, kind of in the hospital," he finished quickly.

The lunar princess choked on the soda in her mouth, as she tried her best to avoid spitting it back out. A few coughing gasps later, and she was good again.

"What happened exactly?" she asked slowly.

*CREAK*

"What the hell was that?" Captain asked.

"A door, most likely. I do wish to hear this tale, would you consent to me casting a sleep spell on you."

"I don't know, me and magic aren't exactly best friends here," the man looked onto the eyes of the lunar princess, now watering at the edges, "how can I say no to that face. Alright, hit me with your best shot."

Luna flared her horn, and a thin strand of magic wormed its way into Captain's head, after which he felt his body go a bit numb, and the outside sounds stop.

"So anyways, timberwolves."

"Please explain from the beginning."

(One explination later.)

"... and then I decided to take a nap."

"So everypony else is also in the hospital?" the princess asked, worry thick in her voice.

"Yeah, but I think that they're okay... mostly, Fluttershy hasn't woken up yet. I'm worried about her."

"Worry not, the venom of a manticore is designed for maximum effectiveness against timberwolves, so I believe that Fluttershy will make a full recovery."

"That's good. Have you heard any news about the gun situation?"

"I have not, but I have noticed a few extra researchers hanging around the castle grounds, as well as a few blacksmiths. Whenever I ask Celestia about it, she always gives me a half-answer, deflects, or ignores me completly, but I shall keep trying."

"We really need to get this taken care of, and quick. I'd hate to see what all that shit could do here."

"As do I."

"Any who, how long's this sleep spell supposed to last?"

"A few hours at most, if you wish to speed things up then I suggest that you sleep in this world as well. That always works."

"I'll catch you later then," Captain said with a yawn as he laid down on the blanket.

"I shall take my leave then, and do not worry, I am sure that Celestia will come to her senses in due time."

"That's what I'm worried about," the man mumbled imperceptibly as the princess took her leave.

Captain awoke to a dull throb in his cheek.

"Don't poke me with that you pervert," he said sleepily, as he  swatted the object of his discomfort.

"He's awake!" Came a shrill shriek from beside him.

"Huh wha?" Was all he managed before a chorus of voices joined in.

"Thank Celestia you're awake," cried Twilight.

"God damn, can't a guy take a nap in peace without everybody losing it?"

"Dude, you've been out for a week. We've all been worried sick about you," said Rainbow quickly.

"What? No I took a nap this afternoon, you all are just fucking with me, aren't you?" Captain said skeptically.

"No, tis true. It appears the spell that I had cast on you in your dream had some unfortunate side effects," Luna explained morosely, "I am sorry, please forgive me. I believed that the magic, minor as it was, would simply lull you into a deep sleep, but not this deep."

"Its cool, I needed my beauty sleep," the man said with a chuckle, "but let's not try that again shall we."

As Captain looked around, he saw Luna, Twilight, Rainbow, and even Nightshade, all standing around him, watching him sleep. As the man stood he felt a sudden stirring in his loins as the urge to relieve himself took hold, furiously.

"Now if you all will excuse me, I have to piss like a racehorse." A hop up, and he was racing on his way to the bathroom.

"What does that saying mean?" Luna inquired.

"Human slang, I wouldn't worry too much about it," replied Twilight before turnig to the door,  "now let's go, apparently humans are modest."

As Captain stood in the bathroom, he noticed that the wound he had gotten from the wolf was mostly gone, and it no longer caused him discomfort. A half-hour, a shower, and several cracked joints later, and he was outside, looking for the rest of his party. A short walk to the cafeteria prooved fruitful as most everyone was there, sitting at a table, a pile of food sitting in the middle, untouched.

"Hey look, what's his face is back," shouted Nightshade from behind Luna.

"So what's the game plan?" Captain asked as he waltzed up to the table and took a seat.

"The plan is to find the rest of these keys," Twilight said as she levitated the ancient tome, which now held the emerald.

"Any idea where it is?"

"Actually, yes. While you were takin a nap, I managed to track down the approximate location of the next jewel." A scroll enveloped in lavender magic unfurled itself on the table. "Here," Twilight said with a hoof on the map, "is about where the next key should be."

"Should be?" Captain asked skeptically.

"Yes, the locator spell is only so accurate, which means that even this close was a lot of work. Don't worry though, the closer we get, the more I'll be able to pinpoint its location."

"Seems simple enough," the man said as he slid his hand across the map. "So, it looks like our next destination is... Horseshoe Bay."