Dreams: Humanity

Chapter 3: Welcome Party (Part Two)

I stared at my chest, expecting it to flash at any moment, to feel the force of the explosion as it tore me apart. But nothing happened, and as I stared at it I determined that it was not, in fact, an explosive. It was some sort of transmitter, with a blank screen and speakers along the shiny silver edges. Basically, I had a thick Ipad strapped to my chest, although something deep inside told me it wasn’t a normal ipad. I felt the plugs in my ears and, after some rigorous testing I noticed I couldn’t hear shit, so I pulled them out.

I had climbed out of the dumpster to find it was the middle of the night, and as such there was next to no one on the street, but I left the gun anyways. No reason to draw attention to myself, right? I walked out of the dark alleyway I inhabited to find the building the dumpster was backing was none other than the building in the picture. I can’t read Chinese for shit, but from the armed men in the windows staring at me, I had a feeling it was a fairly important building. Behind the soldiers though, I saw kids, at least a dozen of them.

“Go fuck yourselves.” I said as loud as I dared, hoping the thing on my chest had a microphone on it. “It’s one thing to make me kill people. It’s another to ask me to blow myself up for you, but to blow up a bunch of little kids? What the hell is wrong with you people?” The street was silent, save for the noise from the building I was standing in front of. Something was wrong; the people I could see were in a panic… Some of those people being armed guards; I had a reason to believe there was something important in there.

Suddenly, the chest pad came buzzed to life, and a familiar voice sounded from it. “Just go into the building, you’ll understand. Consider this a… Welcome party of sorts.” I had never been more terrified to go to a party. Well, there was every birthday after my thirteenth, but that was only because of—“Hurry the fuck up and get into the building, or we’ll kill you and get someone else to do it.”

I couldn’t argue with their logic, and the next guy they found might have been even worse. I was hoping this wasn’t what it looked like. I was hoping… I was hoping this was some dream I had to wake up from. But it wasn’t a dream. It was still the same shitty place. I felt the pad on my chest begin to whir as the voice quickly said, “Put in your earplugs, quick.”

Like the mindless drone I was slowly becoming, I did so. As I did, I noticed the men in the windows acting… Funny is probably the best word for it, because bleeding from the ears while having a seizure really doesn’t have a description. (Although, now that I think about it, it wasn’t all that funny to watch.) I put two and two together, and I felt a little sick.

“I’m sorry.” I breathed, taking my first steps towards hell.

*--^--*

I was tied to a chair, surrounded by multicolored horses, in a tree house. I came because the voice in my head told me to after I shot lightning from my arms to defend myself from the giant dog people, after waking up in my house, finding I was in the middle of fucking nowhere.

If I wasn’t already tied up, I would have strongly recommended that it was done quickly.

There were six of them in the plain room, two unicorns, two pegasi, and two normal horses. (Mirror kept correcting me; apparently they’re “ponies”) The purple unicorn from earlier was the only one who I could see. She was levitating a quill, taking notes I figured, occasionally tossing a glance my way. I caught each one and threw back a stare of my own, and so the game of catch continued. It went that way for at least an hour without a word spoken, until finally she set down the quill and turned towards me.

“So, I’m not sure who you are, or why you’re here, but I hope to figure it out. So, let’s start with something simple: What’s your name?” She spoke in a kind tone, it almost sounded sincere. I pondered the question for a moment, wondering if I should hide it.

No, they’ll trust you if you’re honest. I told myself, and I was usually sensible. “Cian.” I decided to play it neutral, hoping to talk my way out of it. “What’s yours?”

She smiled, and if I weren’t smarter I would have thought it was a true smile. “My name is Twilight Sparkle… I would have thought you would know that, if you had been sent to kill me.” Oh, right. “Speaking of which, who did send you? Was it the cats, because I already said I was sorry about the joke! Actually, it was probably the changelings, now that I think about it.”

I thought back to Mirror. “Causing the extinction of an entire race tends to make them mad. But no, I wasn’t sent by either of them.” I would have to hear that joke later, if it was bad enough to kill over.

She didn’t know how to respond, opting to stammer and scribble something down on the paper instead. And so it continued, the silence from before. After a few minutes, she turned to me again.

“So nopony sent you? Why are you here then?”

“Nobody sent me, no.” I didn’t comment on her odd wording. “I was told where to find you, but I came of my own accord.” I noticed something just as I was about to tell her why I was even there. “Did you notice anything strange about me while I was out?”

She pondered that for a moment, “Is that a trick question?” She smirked, before nodding. “I noticed signs of extreme magical overload on your arms, and no signs of magic use in any part of your body other than your arms, despite you being full of it. I hope you’ve been maintaining a healthy amount of magic use, and I’m just wrong, right? Because by the looks of it, you shouldn’t even have arms.” Foreboding, no?

I turned away from her. “No.” I coughed, and then I quickly asked. “What happens if I haven’t used magic my entire life because I didn’t have it?”

Twilight looked at me like I was insane, and then looked at the others behind me. “I need to try something; all of you need to leave the room.” She sounds serious, I hope that isn’t bad. Hey, the floor suddenly got really interesting. I stared at the beautiful wood floor as the others shuffled out without a word. Holy fucking creepy.

‘Did I miss something?’ I heard Mirror’s voice for the first time since I woke up, surprising me when I was actually relieved. ‘Please, who are you kidding? You love me! Anyways, my question?’ I filled her in on the situation. What do we do? ‘Sounds like she’s going to search your ‘magic history’ for any signs of magic use by you or anyone around you, and then she’ll probably check your power level.’ Must… Resist… The Joke…

Once everyone was gone, Twilight said, “Hold on, I need to go over the scouter spell.” What. She pulled a book to her with her magic and gave it a once over, before nodding and looking at me. Her horn began to glow a lilac color as she approached, and in seconds she tapped it to my head. Seconds passed without sound, without feeling, then she was flung backwards, though she managed to stay on her feet (hooves?).

She looked at me for a moment before breathing, “Impossible…”

I held back a giggle as I asked, “What’s the scouter say about my power level?”

She continued to stare at me, her breathing quickening as her eyes looked me over. I was suppressing my laughter as she began to speak. “It’s… It’s…” Just say it.

“It’s zero. You shouldn’t even exist.” She said matter of factly, her eyes scanning my body as though to make sure I was truly there.

"What." I said flatly, anger creeping into my voice. "What the fuck does not having magic have to do with existing or not? Those Diamond Dogs didn't have magic, but they sure existed! Hell, my back still hurts because of that." I neglected to mention that I killed them before they could use any of the magic they may have had.

She shook her head. "Diamond Dogs have a magical energy, an aura. Every living creature in Equestria--"

"Well there you go! I'm not a living creature from Equestria, am I?" I cut her off before she could finish the statement, visibly irritating her.

"You are in Equestria though, and you have clearly performed magic. If the magical energy threshold, or your ability to perform certain magical acts, wasn't Equestrian then I wouldn't be able to detect the magical overload. Therefore, it means that you performed magic native to Equestria, meaning you should have a detectable magical threshold. You don't, despite every creature that can perform magic, every creature that has ever existed in Equestria save one has one, and every member of that race save one died, the only remaining one is insane!" She finished her speech with a deep breath, nodding to herself for whatever reason.

So I did what every sane person would do: I argued with the nuts chick who had me tied up. "So what you're saying is... I shouldn't be able to do magic, or I can do it all I want?"

She shook her head, staring at the floor. "I don't know. My spell could have been wrong I guess, or maybe you just aren't properly adjusted to Equestria yet, or... I don't know."

And that was the end of that. I sat on the chair until she got a letter from her teacher telling her that “she trusted her to make the right choice.”

So I expected to die. That’s what I would have done in the situation, but maybe I’m just a cruel person.

What actually happened was something even worse.

‘Love is a very powerful force. Even more so when it is focused into a coherent beam of destruction.’ Mirror seemed to find the statement funny, so I had to ask. Why is that so funny? ‘Dunno, it was in your head and it makes so much sense.’

*--^--*

It wasn’t too long after Twilight got the letter that I was untied and given free roam of the library.

“If you take any books, put them back where you found them, and if I see a single book harmed while I’m still alive, I’ll… You’ll be sorry!” Twilight tried to sound stern but only made herself giggle like a schoolgirl. I told her I would be careful, and browsed the selection.

The library was fairly large, every wall was lined with books on any subject I could think of asking about. The second floor looked similar, and the few doors I saw up there led to bedrooms with even more books in them. I was taking the guest bedroom until permanent accommodations could be made, and to be honest I was fine with staying in the library.

Then Twilight told me to put on a blindfold and follow her.

“Why am I doing this again?” I asked the unicorn, hoping I was still following her. The blindfold did make that a bit of a pain to do, but I managed.

“Because I asked you to, and it’ll show that you’re not a bad stallion.”

“I’m not a stallion at all, but I certainly am bad. Just not to the people I like.”

She seemed to find that funny, “You? Bad? So far, you’re one of the nicest ponies I’ve ever met, except Fluttershy and maybe Big Mac.” I decided to not point out the attempted murder, realizing that was best forgotten.

“I’m not a pony. So, where are we going again?” I had to ask questions, or the quiet would annoy me.

“Consider this a… Welcome party, of sorts.” Twilight laughed, then said, “You can take off the blindfold now.”

Just as I did I was hit by a multicolored cloud of confetti, and the sight of at least a hundred ponies somehow crammed into a bakery, which was decorated quite appropriately… For a six year old’s birthday party, maybe. I didn’t want to be rude though, so I just thanked everyone and slipped away once the party started. Thankfully, despite them not running away in fear like last time, they didn’t try to stop me from leaving if they even noticed.

I was just outside when I ran into the cream yellow Pegasus from before, one of Twilight’s friends. Her pink mane obscured most of her face, but I caught a glimpse of the entrancing blue stare of her eyes as they connected with mine. Then she bumped into me, squealed, and jumped away.

“Oh, I’m so sorry Mr. Cian!” She squeaked quickly, hiding her face behind her hooves. She came to her senses a few moments later though, and peeked at me from behind her yellow bulwark. “Why are you leaving the party so soon? I thought it was just starting?”

I smiled, “Loud places just aren’t my style anymore, you know? I was gonna go for a walk… Something tells me you don’t like loud places either, if you want to come I wouldn’t mind the company.” I don’t know why I invited her, as if I expected her to go for a walk with what she probably considered a monster—

“Oh, um, sure, that sounds wonderful. I mean, if it isn’t too much of a bother to you!” She smiled briefly at my invitation, getting to her hooves.

“Not at all, Miss… Sorry, I never got your name.”

“Fluttershy.” She managed to say just loud enough for me to hear, and much to her namesake, she could barely hold eye contact with me.

No wonder she’s so… Shy. So we went walking, not talking, just enjoying the quiet of the town.

It really is a beautiful place, Ponyville. We walked for at least an hour, and only when I had a question about something did either of us speak, and we did this until we got to the park, where we sat beneath a tree by a small creek. I occasionally caught her sneaking looks at me when I was pretending to focus on something else, though she looked away when she realized she was caught. All in all, it was fun.

“If you want to ask me something, you can.” I finally said after the tenth or so time I caught her staring, to her surprise.

She looked away again, and I thought she would just shrug it off. Instead, she asked me, “You seem so confident. Why aren’t you trying to make friends at the party, why are you with… Me…” She whispered the last word.

I didn’t know how to answer with my own words, so I used others. “Whether it be better to be loved than feared or feared than loved? It may be answered that one should wish to be both, but, because it is difficult to unite them in one person, is much safer to be feared than loved, when, of the two, either must be dispensed with. Because this is to be asserted in general of men, that they are ungrateful, fickle, false, cowardly, covetous, and as long as you succeed they are yours entirely; they will offer you their blood, property, life and children, as is said above, when the need is far distant; but when it approaches they turn against you. And that prince who, relying entirely on their promises, has neglected other precautions, is ruined; because friendships that are obtained by payments, and not by greatness or nobility of mind, may indeed be earned, but they are not secured, and in time of need cannot be relied upon; and men have less scruple in offending one who is beloved than one who is feared, for love is preserved by the link of obligation which, owing to the baseness of men, is broken at every opportunity for their advantage; but fear preserves you by a dread of punishment which never fails.

"Nevertheless a prince ought to inspire fear in such a way that, if he does not win love, he avoids hatred; because he can endure very well being feared whilst he is not hated.”

She only looked more confused after that, so I explained. “They’re afraid of me. You all are, I can tell. If I try to find the love of your friends and fail, I am more likely to come away hated and feared. It would be better for me to be feared because I am unknown, than feared and hated because I am known. Trust me, Fluttershy, I wouldn’t make any friends around here if I tried.”

She shook her head, “That isn’t true. I know you can make friends, and no matter what you do you couldn’t make anyone in Ponyville hate you.” She looked at me from behind the pink curtain that masked her face and smiled kindly. “You say you can’t make friends, but you already have. I’m your friend.” Her hoof found my hand, and she wasted no time in wrapping me up in a hug.

And that’s how it went. Too bad it doesn’t work on the girls back home, right?

*--^--*

July 19th, 2010. Woodbury, Minnesota.

I sat on my bed, reading The Prince as I waited for my mom to get home. It was my birthday, so as usual I expected her to have to work late, and then my sister would have to drive us there to pick her up, but “Oh shucks, I think I’m lost,” and suddenly we’d be at a water park, or a restaurant, or something. Really, it was funny to watch them go to so much effort to surprise me that it was obvious. So I waited in my white walled room, until I heard a knock at my door.

My sister, Mary, walked in wearing a tank top and jeans and was carrying a piece of black cloth in her hand. I smiled and set the book aside as she approached the bed.

“So, Mom’s gonna be working late tonight, so I thought I’d give you your present early.” That’s weird. She held the black cloth out to me, and laughed. “Put this on while I go get your present.”

I did so, just because I was curious as to what it was. I heard movement as my sister left and entered the room several times, until I felt one of her hands grab my wrists, and I felt a rope tighten around it.

“Mary, what are you doing?” I asked, worry creeping into my voice as she moved to the other side of the bed and repeated the action.

“Don’t worry, just trust me. You’ll like the present, and this’ll all be worth it.” She tied my ankles to the bed too, and I thought for sure she was going to shout ‘surprise!’ and people would be in the room, and we’d laugh and there would be a party.

I wasn’t expecting lips to meet mine, and a hand to land lower on my body than I wanted it to. I tried to pull away, but I could do little as the other hand held my head in place. I was ready to scream when the mouth pulled away.

“Mary, what the fuck!?” I questioned, pulling at the ropes as hard as I could manage but failing to break free.

“Don’t worry little brother, you’ll like the present. Mom said you would, she told me to save it for you.” I felt a weight on my chest as hands fumbled lower on my body. “You can have me, little brother.”

… I was thirteen years old at the time. My mother came home later that night without saying a word to me, and ignored my pleas. There was no party, and that day was never mentioned by my mother.

Mary would come at least once a week.

What could I have done?

I pretended it was all a dream. I got pretty good at doing that after awhile.