Just Another 'Phantom'

After finally managing to calm down for a second, I glanced back up to see Orange scowling with annoyance.

"What's wrong, Orange? Never seen a human before?" I asked with a sly grin.

Purple looked shocked for a second. "You're a human? But.... You're nothing like the other!" She stamped her hoof in frustration.

I slowly leaned my head back down, rolling my eyes at her typical stereotyping.

Of course I'm not like any other humans. I mean, come on, I'm like-

How does she know about other humans?

Austin. Piss off. I'm in the zone here.

I can't piss off! I'm you! You have dissociative identity disorder, remember? After therapy you managed to keep me in your head, and you only let me out when I really need to take control of the situation.

Oh yeah....... Well, at least Shane isn't here. You may be my logic, but now is really not the time for emotions.

Hey, guys, did someone call me?

Shit.

Shane, piss off. Me and Austin are in the zone here.

I glanced up again with a slow shake of my head to see that Purple's horn was glowing. A sudden jolt of my knife and I was literally pulled to my feet.

"What the hell?" I whispered as I noticed that my knife was surrounded in the same aura that her horn was. And she was pulling with enough force to make any lesser human give up.

Riley... Wait. There's a flaw in her plan. She's trying to take the knife by pulling it towards her... If you let go of the knife, it should fly directly into her and at the very least give you some time to escape.

I flashed a shit-eating grin as I continued to pull on the knife for a second longer, before letting go of it and watching it fly into.... the tree right behind her.

We're screwed.

You still have your desert eagle, and there's no way this place has any legitimate weaponry.

You're right but.... Wait.... Where did Orange go?

I felt a sudden pressure around my waist as a rope was pulled tight and I fell to the ground, arms tied to my side.

"Not cool, Orange!" I shouted as she started to drag me across the ground.

She went on a winding path through the orchard, and I was desperately trying to wriggle my way out of the lasso. But, it was to no avail, as I continued to be dragged on paths that sent me careening into trees and knocking the apples off them. I swear I could hear some of my ribs break on one of the harder collisions.

As we neared the original location where Purple seemed to be studying my knife, the red from the earlier guard's blood long since gone, from the tree bark and the teleportation if nothing else.

I could feel my brain pounding against the inside of my skull, and I knew that I probably had a concussion. I slowly turned my head to where Orange was now standing over me with a smirk on her face.

"Well?" she asked. "Ready to go again?"

I coughed up some blood once before fixing her with a glance. "No, I'm good." I replied.

I flashed a small smile. "That was, by far, the most badass form of torture that anybody has ever done to me. I'm glad to know I'm among professionals." I sighed, before laying my head down on the cool grass.

She just snorted and walked back over to Purple, and they started conversing just out of my audio range.

How am I holding up in there?

We're fucked, just saying. You just had to go and make fun of an alien race of ponies. didn't you?

Not my fault she's into bondage.

Oh, shut up!

I let out a quiet groan as the headache returned with a vengeance, and I glanced down at my body. Dirt and blood stained every inch of my clothes, and I could only see the few black spots that were left untouched. My Deagle was still safely strapped to my waist, though I felt it crash into me when I hit some of the trees. I slowly raised my eyes as Purple and Orange came back towards me.

"Well, since I never got the chance earlier, I'm afraid we haven't introduced ourselves. My name is Twilight and this Is Applejack." Purple calmly stated, but with a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

I opened my mouth to reply, but Austin stopped me.

Let me handle this, I don't want you fucking everything up again.

Fine.

"I'm Phantom. I wish I could say that it's nice to meet you, but, I'm kind of dying here." Austin stated through me, and I could vaguely feel that I was still in control of my body.

Actually, It's pretty smart you kicked in there, or I might have gone on another run.

What would you have done without me?

Dying on almost every mission comes to mind.

Purple- er, Twilight shot me a confused glance for a second. "Are you alright? Your voice seemed to change while you talked." She pointed out.

I rolled my eyes. "I suffer from D.I.D." I told her.

The two mares glanced at each other before Applejack sighed.

As long as nothing major happens, we should be good,. Pray for the best.

I'm atheist, remember?

You still may need something other than me for comfort.

Yeah, let's go with that.

"We're taking you to meet our Princess, and she'll decide your punishment for nearly killing me. However, as we don't trust you at all, we're going to leave you in ropes for the time being." Twilight told me before I felt myself being dragged again, albeit this time more gently.

Nope, we're fucked. Good luck bud.