I told you to go right

Already knowing what was going to happen is fun. My friends and I had already foretold a few things that day/night, like Nightmare Moon's return, and where the Elements were, so I was quite reluctant to stand near the cliff edge, especially when Solar and Twilight had locked my wings to my side in order to prevent me from flying off ahead and getting lost or whatever. But either way, I suppose, the cliff was going to fall: I go on it or not. Rainbow Dash was already telling her 'scary' story, to which Fire had responded by explaining The Rake. Rainbow shut up for a few moments, so I had the air to myself. For effect, I crouched incredibly low, raising a hoof for the others to stop.
"What are you doing, Thunder?" Twilight asked. Despite not even facing her, I could already detect an expression of worry on her face. "Are you having another of your attacks?"
"No," I replied in a stereotypical British accent, which came out sounding like the guy from Elementary's voice. "I am merely detecting the future that is to occur within 20 seconds. I believe that this cliff is due to collapse, mainly because of the cracks coming from the edg-"
"You're losing it again." Rainbow groaned to interupt, rolling her magenta eyes.
"Don't cut me off, I am armed with many more brain cells than you."
"Mine still work." Rainbow sneered.
"You have brain cells?"
"More than you."
"I'm sorry, but I have more than ten. You'll have trouble counting them."
"More than TEN? Ooh, intimidating." The both of us were now in each other's faces, glaring angrily as we both traded insults.
"More intimidating than making a rainbow-coloured explosion."
"Don't start."
"I'll fucking 'start' whenever I want. You won't be able to 'stop' being an irritating bi-"
A stone crackling suddenly stopped our exchange in its tracks. All twelve of us stopped, raised our snouts in the air, and looked for the source. Half of us, my friends and I, were feigning confusion; we knew what was to happen next. Suddenly, Sky, Inferno, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy took to the air as the ground beneath gave way and sent 8 of us tumbling. I couldn't really tell what was going on those next few moments; I was too busy rolling head over hooves down the rocky slope. At one point, I even thought I heard the sound of Halo's noise that comes up when your shields break. Except it probably wasn't shields. More likely my left foreleg twisting out of place. I yelled in pain loudly, before I felt the ground go beneath me. I instinctively shot up a hoof to grasp the ledge that would save my life, and thankfully my hoof caught into a gap in the rocks. To my right, I could see Twilight in a much better position than I: both forelegs on the ledge with a firm grip, with hind legs waggling to find purchase on another platform. Applejack appeared above her, they performed the monologue. Only half was all I heard: stone was cracking under my hoof that was holding me up.
"No..." I groaned as the stone began to loosen. "ARE YOU SHITTIN' M-" The masonry completely crumbled, destroying the only surface I could grab onto before I began my rapid descent down the 50 metre drop. The world and it's colours melded together in an upwards blur as the ground became increasingly close. In one final attempt to open my wings and save myself, I closed my eyes and used as much energy as possible to break the lock spell.
20 metres...
10 metres...
0 metres.
That's odd. How come I didn't die in a big bloody splatter of...blood? I waited about 3 seconds before opening one eye. The whole world was sideways; my right forehoof lay in front of my field of vision, and every sound was muffled. In my mouth I tasted copper, and my eyes were dulled.
One thing that wasn't dulled, however, was the excessive pain in my left foreleg. Grunting loudly in pain, I picked myself up with my right foreleg and hind legs, before resting on my haunches and checking my leg. The front of the hoof was facing backwards, and vice-versa, causing an exceedingly painful jolt of pain whenever I attempted to move it. My hearing suddenly returned, and hooves cantering towards my location caused me to panic slightly. I grunted in pain once again, enduring the havoc my injury wrought in my body. The hooves finally stopped in front of me.
"Oh dear sweet Celestia!" Rarity cried, stepping forward and looking at the leg with an incredibly shocked expression. "Are you OK?"
"Yep," I replied, wincing as she poked it. "Never -nnnfff!-...better." Twilight remained unconvinced.
"Your leg is dislocated." she groaned. "We'll need to snap it back into place. I'll do it for you, if you want." she smiled.
"Nope, let me." Solar said, stepping forward. "However, I might 'accidentally' snap it the wrong way..." he sniggerex, igniting his horn.

"FUCK NO." I yelled, scrambling back slightly. "I've been smacked in the face by a Manticore, I'll do it! Christ on a fucking bike..." Grasping the injured limb with my free hoof, not even stopping to consider HOW I'm grasping it, I closed my eyes and wrenched the limb away from me. I yelled so loudly, Fluttershy staggered back. I gave a weak smile, before speaking again. "Y'know? I'm just going to pass out now. Ebony catch me." That comment made, I fell forwards, eyes closing, and silently beat the crap out of my luck for spending the opportunity of a Brony's lifetime by being unconcious.

My friends already knew what was about to happen. I didn't; I was too tired, forgetful, and I really couldn't give a shit if Chuck Norris came up and pissed on me at that point. My head was hung low, my eyes were half open, and I was trudging along just behind the group. And almost as if on cue, Nightmare returned to my head.

Oh, are you tired?
Not now...maybe later...
How about a lullaby? Would that help?
Don't even...fucking go there...
Hush now, quiet now...
SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU.
Wow, calm down.
Sorry, just the tiredness speaking. Well, after that outburst I feel more alert.
...what?
Luna, if you're confused about my mind, leave now.
Stop calling me Luna.
Fine. I still think it's sexier than Nightmare Moon, though.
Oh, stop it, you. You're making me blush.
Wow. Just realized who I'm flirting with.
Seriously? The amount of mental imprints of my plot I've transmitted to your mind, and you just realized?
No, it's just I'm engaged in constant innuendo filled conversations with the ruler of Equestria, 's'all.
How do you kno-
Don't ask.
I might go and get your next trap ready. See you soon, handsome.
You too, gorgeous.
Oh, and Mustang? Watch out.
Wait, wha-
A sudden splash of cold water awoke me from my stupor. I shook my head quickly, all the tiredness gone, and looked quickly in front of me. A raging river had some weird purple ginger splashing about in it, just in front of me stood the girls: sopping wet. I didn't care I was sopping wet, though. I stepped to the side; one piece of the storyline has to stay intact. Suddenly, a hoof fell on my shoulder. Looking quickly behind me, the rather imposing figure of Ebony Chopper towered over me.
"I know what you're thinking about." he smirked.
"What? What then? Hmm? What am I thinking of, hermano?" I replied, my inner Vaas taking over for several seconds, before being beaten down by Jason Brody.
"Dat flank." he grunted, biting his lower lip and conjuring some sunglasses as we both gazed upon the beautiful wet asses. After a moment of silence between us, Sky came in.
"We do NOT fit in here." he laughed. All 6 humans-turned-pony grunted a simultaneous "Yeah." to approve. Suddenly, a rather gay scream split through the air, causing 11 of us, save Rarity, to gasp. She had pulled one of his scales out, clutching it in her prepostorously white teeth, before slicing her tail off and fastening it to the serpent's moustachey stump.. The rest of us breathed a sigh of relief, as Fire Trail spoke up.
"Christ, though she'd killed him!" he snorted, as we all laughed at that idea.
"Aah, the blood would have gone fucking EVERYWHERE!" Sky Wheel replied, wiping a hoof to remove a tear. Suddenly, I realized that Twilight had realized something due to the expression she pulls when confused.
"How are we going to get across the river, guys?" she asked. A sudden 'ahem' from the purple gay thing drifting in the river.
"Allow me!" he politely said, creating a bridge with his body. We all smiled, as the twelve of us began to leap over the lumps. I hadn't done much jumping in my new body, so literally the moment I landed on the first segment all four of my hooves lost all grip. I scrambled my legs about to find purchase, but to no avail: I slipped and tumbled into the water. Thankfully, it wasn't deep, and I landed on a small mound of sand under the water. Spitting out a mouthful of water and wiping the wet mane from my eyes, I heard nothing but laughter coming from the other side of the lake.

"Yep," I sighed, "Fuck you, too. Fuck you."

You're wet.
Oh for god's sake...
I'm wet too.
Will you please just stop it?
Why? I know you're from a different dimension.
...
Yes, the metaphorical sunglasses are removed. I had no hoof in bringing you here, though. That was just out of chance that you ended up here. I don't know if you're here for a reason or not, but either way you won't beat me. To recycle one of your lines, there's no way that somepony that sexy can defeat me.
Seriously? The 'mother of god' meme exists here? Wow.
THAT'S all you're amazed about? I worry about you.
I worry about YOU, too.
Aww, thank you.
Wanna know why I worry?
Because you desire revenge for my electrocution of you?
Yes, that and the fact we are practically outside your hideout.
Come in, darling. It will be wonderful to meet you again.
Same. It'll be an honour to help turn you back into your former, sexy self.
Aw, really? Shame: you won't.
Tough shit.