Trumpets

Chapter 18

   The 5 (because Fluttershy is a scared cunt. You know, that seems mean. All she is is shy. She ain't no cunt, but she sure as hell could grow a pair of female balls.) led me around the town with little conversation. Not even from Pinkie. Not like a cared. Most of what they say are questions anyways.

   We ended up at the carnival ride themed Carousel Boutique. I was forced into a conversation by the rich bitch (who probably wasn't very rich) Rarity. "Darling, the clothes you are wearing are simply hideous."

   "Yea, sleeping by trash cans for 2 years and never getting them washed or fixed can do that," was reply.

   "So that's the bad smell!" piped in Rainbow Dash.

   Look out! We have a fucking rocket scientist in the house!

   "Indeed."

   "Well, I think I should make you some new ones." Rarity said.

   "Well, miss. They're two problems with that. One, I ain't got no money, and the rule that applies everywhere is 'nuttin' in this worlds for free. Now, the second reason and getting into my normal, white guy voice, is the fact I do not wish to wear any clothes you ponies design. I'd end up in a jockeys uniform, probably."

   "Don't be silly! You wouldn't have to pay a thing! Letting me work on such a unique creature is payment enough!"

   Yay. Help my feeling some more, you bitch. "Be that as it may, I do not wish to wear pony designed clothes."

   "I have the perfect design for you, though."

   I gotta see this shit. "Ight, whatever."

   She let out a squee. "Ok! Let's take some measurements! Take off those hideous clothes!"

   I did. I don't really care about my nudity. Hell, I'd go night stripping for fun on a hot night. Plus, these ponies never wear clothes.

   Ah, the life of a ghetto kid.

   She and the others took one look at my body. "Hunter, are you healthy?"

   And my answer to that was: "Nope! Now measure away!"

   She complied. She measured my top and did my bottom, but stopped at my boys. "What is this?" she touched it with a cold hoof.

   I fell just from that touch I will be shunned from heaven and hell.

   "Something that if you touch any longer I'd sue you for molestation."

   She quickly pulled it away. I noticed a blush. 'Yes, any decent person would do that.' "I'm terribly sorry!"

   The other girls were laughing. 'Thanks for the self esteem boost, guys!'

   When that was over, I was told to come back tomorrow. She stayed back to work and the others, excluding Twilight, left. Me and her were just walking to the tree, alone.

   "You seem to have a lot of emotional problems." She upright says.

   "Ouch, my feelings."

   "I'm serious! You are extremely pessimistic and don't want to talk about anything!"

   "And how long did it take you to come up with that, Einstein?"

   "What's 'Einstein?'"

   "A genius from my world. And no, it wasn't a compliment."

   "You see! That's what I'm talking about!"

   I've just about had enough of this. I sighed. "You only known me for what? A day of me not trying to pretend to be a pony? Don't judge me. Well, you can judge me. Everyone judges people. I guess all you can hope for is not to be judged."

   Like I judge you, reader. FUCKING STOP READING.

   "But you need help!"

   "Listen, I pray to god you know what respect is. You can think all you want about me. As long as you respect me and my wishes, I'll be fine. Because when I die, I won't have money anywhere, my clothes and belongings won't matter. What people think of me doesn't matter. But when I die, whether it be suicide, homicide, or natural causes, the only thing I can be judged by and have is my respect, ya got that?"

   It took her a minute to shake her head.

   "Good. Now let's go. I'm tired and hungry."

   Oh shit, that reminds me. I gotta hunt for meat. Not even this dragon eats. He is forced on an all vegetarian diet.

   'Well, hopefully that's someone that shares my pain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   I was up in the room, reading on some history books when Twilight barges in. "I need you to answer something," she says.

  "Ok, shoot."

   "Why do you do this? Not talk about anything?" she asks all emotional like.

   'God, out of all the worlds, I get sent to the loony pony run one where they keep pressuring you to let it all out in a non-sexual way?'

   I start to read the book as I answer her with a question. "Why do you read when you know how the story ends."

   With an angry sounding grunt she left.

   'Great. This world is definitely  going to piss me the hell off.'