The Battle for Pinkie

Shadowfang walked blindly into the darkness. He searched for the light switch, he wanted to try it even though he knew it wouldn’t work. he found his hunch was true. He still wasn’t afraid though, because he didn’t need light to see. he was the spawn of the darkness, he could see through the veil of darkness like his eyes were lighthouses cutting through fog. He searched for any traps, tripwires, timers pressure plates, anything Pinkie could come up with in this short of a time. Satisfied that there were not traps in his immediate vicinity, Shadowfang continued on his search for the mentally ‘unsound’ person that could or could not be in his house. He rounded the corner into the kitchen to see a plate of cupcakes on the counter, with a note on it. Shadow walked up to it cautiously, checking his surroundings, he grabbed the note and read it aloud.

“Send me a postcard from hell would ya? Signed Pinkamena Pie? Aww how nice.” He said just before the explosion ripped any other words from his mouth.

He woke up, tied to a chair, in his own interrogation room.

“Oh this is cute.” He said, still not feeling any fear for what was about to come.

He quickly started working on weakening the bonds, he stopped as he heard someone start to enter the room.

“Hi Pinkie! How are you?” He asked.

“My name isn’t Pinkie! It's Pinkamena!” She yelled at him.

“Oh ok, how are you, Pinkamena?”

“I’m good.” She replied flatly.

“Good, good...now about those cupcakes...” He started.

“They were supposed to kill you...why didn’t they kill you? They would have killed any normal pony, but I guess you aren’t a normal pony are you?” She asked, looking him over and tilting her head to each side at unnatural angles.

“Why whatever do you mean?”Shadowfang asked, buying time for his escape.

“Not only do you look different, you act different, you think different. Over all you are more like me than anypony else on this earth!” She said maniacally.

“Of course I am...” Shadowfang said sarcastically, barely holding back his joy at hearing his bonds snap off.

“You are! You’re a mental basket case! Your bat-shit crazy! You take those green n’ yellow, purple pills! We are the exact same!” She said walking around in circles.

She turned around to see a chair enveloped in a aura, blacker than luna’s night, come flying at her from the corner of the room. She ducked, just in time.

“Ha! you think thats enough to kill me? Well you were-” THWACK! The chair flipped around in mid-air, and broke over her head.

“I’m not anything like you!” Shadow shouted in defiance.

“Oh but you are! We are both unloved and unwanted. We both need to hide who we really are to be accepted by these silly pony fools. We can do so much better than them. They deserve to cower beneath us, they deserve to have fear struck in their heart when we simply walk by.”

Shadowfang straightened up and flared out his wings, “No, i'm better than that. I’m here to make sure ponies like you won't ever hurt anyone again.”

“Now I’m going to give you a chance, to walk out of here with no more pain involved, and I really hope you say no to this, but: If you leave Ponyville and don’t come back until you are normal, then I will let you go, if not...then I’m going to have a lot of fun for the rest of the evening!”

“FUCK YOU! I’M NOT LEAVING MY FRIENDS TO YOU!” Pinkamena shouted from her position on the ground.

“Good, now I have a show to go with my dinner!” Shadow said as he picked her up with one hoof and threw her at the door.

A COUPLE HOURS LATER

Shadowfang was walking to the oh-so-famous hidden bar. This was the only place to get a proper drink in this town, and Celestia knew he needed one from all of the beatings he had to give Pinkamena to get her to submit to Pinkie’s control. Something was off, the bouncer wasn’t at the front entrance.

“Hmm thats strange, it's not closing time yet...in fact I think that this should be their most popular hour.” Her thought aloud while he walked to the door.

The bar was cleverly hidden, inside of what looked like an abandoned building, there was a very high quality, and very popular bar. It was the first and most likely last place in Equestria to publicly serve alcohol. As he reached the door, Shadowfang heard a loud crash, and Vinyl yelling something about a paycheck.

“Oh the bouncer is probably quelling a fight.” He said.

When he entered, he heard a loud demonic voice yelling, “I'm getting bored... TIME TO GET GRUESOME!!”

He entered to see what looked like a robot, fighting a bunch of ponies. Shadowfang noticed his number of KOs, looking at the pile of bodies on the floor. He was amazed by the pony’s strength and speed.

He was about to intervene when, the pony stopped his pummeling and out popped two pairs of cylinders from his back, a pair on his left and a pair on his right. They started emitting a high-pitched screeching sound.

Shadow went to leave when he heard the pony say, “Now, anyone that would like to die, please keep fighting, or we can continue our nights like nothing happened, and we can still have fun! Wadda ya say?”

“Sounds good to me.” Shadowfang mumbled to himself as he went to sit at his spot at the bar.

He watched as the fighting pony walked over to Vinyl, Octavia and Rainbow who were slightly huddled in the corner, obviously terrified of the large stallion. The machinery retracted into his back with the sound of clanking metal. He saw the pony begin talking to the three mares, and they seemed to calm down. They kept talking and laughing until Vinyl spotted him sitting down.

“Hey guys, its Shadowfang! Wassup Shadow, ya need a drink? Ya want the usual?”

If it's the usual, then what do you think? He thought angrily.

“Yeah, the usual will be fine.” He said as he noticed the fighter pony glaring at him.

Vinyl went to work making the drink as Shadow and the fighter had a contest to see who could make their heat vision work fastest. They were interrupted by Vinyl slamming the drink right in front of them. Shadow threw some bits on the bar, and expertly, chugged the drink.

After a moment the fighter said, “Hey boss!”

Oh great he is probably a new bouncer or something. This is going to be an interesting next couple of days. Shadowfang thought with venom in his words.

“Yeah?’ Vinyl repsonded.

“I’ll have what he’s having!” He said, never taking his eyes off of me.

"Are you sure? Its pretty strong." Vinyl warned.

"Yeah, I'm sure." He said.

He received the drink and downed it like Shadow had just done, but not after offering a toast to him. He ordered three more, and chugged them all. After about ten minutes, all four of them were drunk, and they shooed everyone out except for Shadow. Shadow sat there for about thirty minutes, waiting for the feeling of alcohol in his system to set in. Once it had , he took three bottles of Jack, payed for them, and walked out. He drank them all before getting home. Once he had gotten home, he stumbled to the basement, to where Pinkie Pie was, and he broke down crying.

“Why do there have to be people like you here? Your kind don’t deserve to live!” He yelled at the unconscious body of Pinkie.

He walked over to where he kept his tools, and brought out his favourite knife.

“We have been through so much together, knife. We’ve been through good times and bad. You were always there for me when no one else was- wait why am I talking to my knife?” Shadow asked.

“Oh well I came here to do this and so I will!” He shouted, more to hear his own confidence than anger.

Shadow walked over to the pink, purple and blue mass, raised his dagger up high, and plunged it down into her now lifeless body.

Or he would have if he didn’t have some conscience. Instead he drove it into her restraints and unlocked her. He picked her up and walked up the stairs, out the door, and to the Cake’s residence. He set her down and rang the doorbell.

Mr. Cake opened the door and just about fainted, “Oh Celestia! What happened?”

“I dunno, I saw her at the b-*hick*-ottom of a small c-cliff in the Everfree. So I brought her here, she is still alive, I think, and she doesn’t s-seem to have taken any bad hits to the head, so she should be f-fine*hick*.” Shadowfang slurred.

“Oh um ok I’ll get her up to her room,” Mr. Cake said, “and Shadow?”

“Y-yeah?”

“Why were you drinking in the Everfree?” Mr. Cake asked.

“I had a parrrttay! It was fun!” He replied, almost falling over when he said ‘party’.

“Oh ok...you go sleep off that booze now! We might need you in the morning if Pinkie can’t do it!” He yelled to Shadow as he walked away.

“Gotit!” Shadow yelled back.

Shadow arrived at his house, stumbled up the stairs, and fell into his bed, face first. As he was falling asleep, he heard somepony say, “You shouldn’t have left me alive.”