Deadpool and Cable had just entered Canterlot to see AppleFuck, Pinkie Pie, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash turn the corner down the street.

{THERE!!! They're over there!}

[They must be heading towards the palace.]

"Not if we can help it!" Yelled Deadpool as he took off down the street after them.

"Stop right there criminal scum!" Yelled a royal guard as he ran in from outside the blow open gate. "Nobody breaks the law in this county!"

{HA!}

[It's funny because it's true.]

"Fuck da police!" Yelled Deadpool as he shot randomly behind him.

Cable ducked allowing the bullets to go over his head. "Damnit Wade! Watch where you're shooting!"

"One, no! Two, meet me at the palace!" Yelled Deadpool as he jumped through a window of a white and golden house. He landed on a table face first. "*Sniff sniff* What the fuck am I laying on!?" He picked himself up to see what looked like a sandwich... full of hay? "Now that is what I call horse food!"

{HAHAHA!!! When will the puns end!?}

[They most likely won't so let's just laugh at them until the author runs out and tries to reuse them.]

(HEY!!! I find that offensive!)

[Why are you speaking in red?]

(Because... You can both shut up!)

{Maybe I don't want to!}

"Are you three done yet?" Deadpool asked confusing the ponies who were already scared half to death from him landing on their lunch.

(Yeah...)

{We're...}

[Done.]

"Thank you!" Deadpool said. He then stood up and jumped down off the table. "Oh, and by the way. You should stop eating hay. If you're smart enough to talk, then you're smart enough to make chimichangas." He then went into the next room and jumped out the window into an ally way.

[Well that was stupid and pointless.]

(Made some people laugh didn't it?)

{Not all of it did.}

"NO! I'm not letting you guys start that again!" Deadpool said.

[Why are we even doing this? Going after those ponies just seems so pointless...]

"*angry sigh* Because they tried to put us in jail for killing a dragon which was trying to kill us!" Deadpool yelled angrily.

[I completely forgot about that.]

{We all did!}

Deadpool face palmed and began to walk down the ally way. "Damn this place is colorful!" Deadpool said as he reached the end of the ally and looked at the big city. When he look towards the palace, which wasn't to far away now, he saw what he knew he would see. Royal guards with spears. "Spears again? These pony things should really upgrade their armory."

[Well, there's no point in standing around and looking at them.]

{Kill them! KILL THEM ALL!!!}

"I'll shoot to that!" Deadpool yelled as he pulled out his SMGs and ran at the royal guard.

"I'm dual wielding my SMGs, and I'm gonna go on a killing spree!"

"You better not try to mess with me, 'cuz I'm dual wielding my SMGs!" Deadpool sang as he blew holes all over every guards body. "Fools! You can't mess with me! I'm dual wielding MY SMGs!!!"

One guard charged at Deadpool only to get a foot in the face and a bullet in the dick. "OOOOOOOOHHHH!!!!! Damn, that's gotta hurt!" Deadpool said as he watched the guard bleed out.

Another guard threw a spear at Deadpool who at the last second side stepped to avoid it. The spear hit the guard who was bleeding out and killed him on impact, due to stabbing him threw the eye and into his brains. "WELL!!! Good thing I ain't him! Because that looked like a butt load of PAIN!!!" Deadpool said as he shot another guard to his right in the ribs with out looking.

By this point a lot of guards were losing hope. They stared at this... thing who just wouldn't shut up. He was strange, dangerous, and invincible. And the thing that they all new and yes, feared most of all, was that it had completely lost it's mind... a long time ago.

"Halt! Stay where you are or you will suffer the consequences!" Yelled a booming, yet majestic, voice.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwww SHIT!!!" Yelled one of the royal guards from the side. "You done FUCKED UP, NIGGA!!!!!!!"

"..."

[...]

{...}

(...)

{HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!}

[They actually DO have bad things in this world!]

Before our anti-hero could pitch in with his fair share of shitty puns, Princess Luna and Celestia (Celestia points gun at author's head) Princess Celestia and Luna made their way through the crowd of guards and to the front of Deadpool.

"Sup, Bitches." Deadpool greeted them.

Celestia looked back at Twilight who was standing behind her with her friends. "Yo, Twily. Dis the guy who's givin' you niggas problems?" Twilight nodded. Celestia looked back at Deadpool. "Yo, bitch! You givin' my prized pupil problems!?"

"Nigga, whatchya think!?" Deadpool yelled.

"NIGGA!"

"NIGGA!"

"NIGGA!" They went back and forth for a long time before Luna butted in.

"Sister! What does thou think they are doing!?" She asked right after she finished sending a text to her bottom bitch (Luna's a pimp.)

Celestia looked over at Luna and whispered harshly. "Can't you see I'm trying to speak it's language!?" Now with this knew information, Luna looked over at our anti-hero who was still screaming at the sisters.

"NIGGA!!!"

"NIGGA!" Celestia started back up.

"NIGGA!"

"NIGGA!"

"NIGGA!"

"Urm... Uh..." Luna thought of what to say. "NIGGER!" The entire place fell quite.

"..." Deadpool was speechless. "N-Nigga..." He said as he covered his eyes. "That was uncalled for..."

"Damnit Luna!" Celestia yelled at Luna. "Go back to the palace and get the whip out!"

"B-But sister I-"

"NO BUTTS!" Celestia pointed at Deadpool who had turned around and bent over. "BE SURE TO CLEAN OFF YOUR GAG AS WELL!"

"Y-Yuz sister..." Luna walked away, looking like a beaten child... which she was...

Celestia turned back to our ant-hero and looked him up and down. "I'm sorry you had to see that..." She then recomposed herself. "Let us start over. My name is Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria." She said. "As far as I have heard from my faithful student, you have committed crimes against everything we believe in. Speak now!"

"Don't worry about it." Deadpool said. "It wasn't my fault... it..."

"WADE!" Yelled Cable as he ran up into the area. "YOU STUPID PIECE OF-"

"It was him." Our Hero said as he pointed a finger at Cable. Not a second later, Princess Celestia shot a beam of magic at Cable.

"GOOOOOD DAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMNNNN IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Cable screamed as he was slowly sucked into a portal of magic that had surrounded him.

"There we go! Everything's back to normal!" Our Hero yelled as he began to walk away.

"W-Wait!" Yelled Twilight. "That robot guy didn't do anything wrong! It was D-" Before the librarian could finish her sentence, Deadpool pulled out a TV controller and hit the 'mute' button while pointing it at her.

"It was who, Twilight?" Celestia asked.

Twilight moved her lips but nothing escaped.

"It was Dead-" Rainbow Dash started before Deadpool appeared next to her and cut her off.

"Hey! Rainbow Splash! How's about I erase your internet history!" Deadpool blurted out, causing her to shut her mouth and smile (despite the misuse of her name). "And you! AppleFuck! How's about I tie your older brother (who he's never even met) up and leave him in your room tonight!?" AppleJack showed the excitement in her eyes as she pretended to zip her lips.

"Pink One!" Our Hero yelled at Pinkie Pie. "Pineapples!"

"French toast!" She yelled back with a salute.

"Now then!" Deadpool yelled as he looked at Celestia. "According to ever other fanfiction! I should go to Ponyville where me and these bunch of bitches go on adventures!"

(You need to slow the fuck down!)

{You need to hurry the fuck up!}

(Shit!)

"I assume you are right, thing I do not even know of yet I am still acting like I do not know that you are the bad guy here." Celestia said with all the sarcasm in the known universe. "Now go back to Ponyville with these little shits while I go smoke some crystal meth!" Celestia then pulled a cellphone out of her vagina and dialed a number in. She walked away with the phone up to her ear and the last words Our Hero heard were: "Yo, Walter White! My man!"

Our Hero then looked down at his new found hoes who all stared up at him with different expressions. He thought for a long time before he pulled out a stick and threw it at a near by bar. "Follow the stick!" Deadpool screamed as he ran toward the bar, hoping they had vodka.

Author's Note

LOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT'S A FUCKING UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!