Garry's Mod Vs. Equestria

"WWWWHHHHHEEEEEEERRHRRRHRHWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!! I get to kill a dragon!" I saw Celestia cringe away from my voice, but I didn't care. "A real live, fire breathing, people eating, town smashing, treasure hording, fucking dragon! This is so fucking cool!"

Celestia cleared her throat.

"Aw, I'm gonna have to tell Viking and Serpent about this! I'm a fucking dragon slayer!"

Celestia cleared her throat loudly.

"Once I cut his head off I can get all the gold! It'll be so fucking rad, dude!

"I know, it's awesome! I can't wait to go!

"I'm going to need some supplies, but- Ah, fuck it! I'm a mighty knight, I need no supplies!

"Yeah, who needs supplies?! We'll go in all badass with our coat blowing in the wind and the Sun at our back silhouetting us in "darkness- Oh, fucking rad dude!

"I know!"

I looked at Celestia with an excited smile on my face. "When do I leave?!"

She looked confused. "Were you just talking with... yourself?" she asked me.

I shook my head. "No, I was talking to some of the aliases I made for myself. Why would I talk to myself when I could talk with them?"

She was quiet for a few seconds before she spoke. "Once your friends are ready to go, you'll all be given directions for getting there."

I smiled.

I put on my Knight Playermodel- the really badass one from the Game of Thrones Knights add-on, gotknight4- and spawned myself a large arsenal of back-in-the-day weapons. A gigantic sword that was as long as my body and half as wide, a mace that was bigger than me covered in spikes, a crossbow with dozens of bolts, a dozen small knives across my chest, and two large cleavers on either hip.

I took to a kneeling pose in front of Celestia. "Your Highness, I shall not fail you in this mission. If you will me to fight the terrible dragon, I shall. Though I may perish in this task you set forth for me, I will do my utmost to ensure that the great beast is slain dead."

I raised her hoof gently up to my face and pulled my visor up, giving the dainty hoof a small kiss before releasing it. "Though we may be of different worlds, I will prove to you that I am worthy of your love."

Celestia drew back uncertainly. "Uh, that is... good. But we must wait for your friends before we can proceed."

The world in which I was in faded slightly, but kept going.

I smiled at her fondly as I rose, adoring her beauty in a way no other could. I felt my heart swell as the light of the hearth danced in her eyes. Both alluring and forbidding at the same time, her frame against the open window of her quarters amazed me.

As the flurries of snow and ice blew by, I could not help but imagine that I was bringing wrong into this world by loving her. But as my gaze once again met with hers, those poisonous thoughts fled my mind. Instead, thoughts of us filled their spots. Thoughts of our future together in the kingdom.

I smiled. "Do you remember the time we first met? Under that enormous oak in the grounds?"

Her eyes were uncertain, but after a few seconds they lit up with recognition. "Oh yes, a Tuesday, was it not?" she said.

I nodded. "Yes, it was indeed a Tuesday. Tell me, do you remember what happened after you saw me for the very first time? What you said?" I asked, a laugh in my voice.

She giggled musically. "Oh yes, I remember. How could I forget?"

We both laughed.

"I called the guards," she said.

"Even though I told you not to," I said.

"And they came and tried to restrain you..."

"But I fought them off..."

"And I was terrified."

"And I told you that I never meant to cause you any harm, but that I was from another world and was seeking aid."

"Then I asked you your name."

"Then I told it to you and you laughed."

"It is a strange name," she said with a giggle.

"It's not where I come from."

She smiled at me. "Maybe it was how I said it. You say it and I'll try not to laugh."

I smiled at her. "M'lady, I am Kurt, son of Allan, brother of Gregory, Knight of the First, Second, Third, and Fourth realm of Regius, heir to the legacy of the line of Bolaird, recognized sheriff and legal diplomat of the Kingdom of Main Star. It is a pleasure to meet you, under any circumstances."

She giggled again. "Kurt," she said. "It really is a strange name for Equestria."

"I hope that does no dissuade you from accepting me as your husband one day. Hopefully in the near future?" I ventured.

She smiled serenely and caressed my jaw line with her hoof. "Maybe, my knight. Maybe if my sister woul-"

"To Tartarus with your sister!" I growled, shocking her.

"K- Kurt!" she gasped.

"I am sorry M'lady, but your sister has done nothing but cause you heartache and grief since the death of your alchemist. It pains me to see you suffer, and I wish that I could do something to help you."

She smiled at me sadly. "There is, I'm afraid. The dragon. Perhaps if you slay the beast, we can be together. Perhaps my sister will see that you are no mere fool in armor."

I smiled at her, leaning in closely. "M'lady, for you, I am a fool in armor. I am your fool in armor."

"Oh Kurt, you know we can't..." she said, trailing off. "If anyp-" but she was cut off as our lips met.

Deep was the kiss. Deep, loving, lustful, wanting, needing, all these things and more could describe it. But I used only one word. Our. It was our kiss. Forever, it would be our kiss. Until the next one, and the one after that, and so on until the end of my short life here.

I pulled away, not wanting, but needing to.

Celestia's eyes widened as she looked around her. "Where are we?" she whispered.

I chuckled. "We're in my imagination," I said. And just like that, the world around us collapsed. I was no longer a noble, devoted knight, and she was no longer a beautiful princess who I wanted to marry one day. I was me, and she was her.

"By the way, my name's not really Kurt. I just thought that would be a good name for a knight," I told her.

She looked at me in confusion. "How did you do that? The snow storm, the candles, the... everything? How was that possible?"

I chuckled to myself. "When you're RPing, the world around you is nothing but your imagination. From there, you can do whatever you want to."

"You're RPing and you didn't invite me?! You... bastard!" a familiar voice said from behind me.

I smiled.

I turned, trowing my arms high in the air to welcome my companions. "Brian, O'Hare, it is good to see you again!" I said loudly.

The two of them stood there.

The world shifted and flickered a bit before settling.

"Are you here for the quest, my friends?" I asked them.

Brian stepped forward, his armor freshly polished. "Yes, I am!" he said in his thick Northern accent. "I am here for talk vith pony princess for dragon problem."

I raised an eyebrow. "She has told you then?" I asked.

He nodded, his armor clanking loudly. "Yes, pony princess tell us about mission! Big dragon, at big mountains! Ve go kill big dragon und make big dragon armor for protect us! Good protect, few flaw."

I nodded. "Very good Brian, I could use all the help I can get." I turned to O'Hare, my oldest friend. "So, old friend. Are you up for another adventure? Can your bones take it?" I asked with a laugh.

Serpent shrugged. "I guess. Let's just go throw a nuke in the mountain and blow it up. After that we can just loot his house."

The world around us shattered, the real Equestria forming again.

I scowled at Serpent. I even saw Viking and Celestia give him dirty looks. "No Serpent, we need to do this right," I said angrily. "No nukes, no flying, no powers, no nothing! You need to be a knight and use a sword!"

He gave me a dirty look. "No I don't! I can use a freaking minigun if I want to!"

"No, you can't!" I yelled.

"Why?!" he yelled back.

"It's in the rules! You can't use any guns unless you design them yourself, gather the materials, make the parts, and craft them! You didn't do any of that, so you're not allowed to use a gun!"

"What rules are you talking about?!"

"The rules that tell us how to do this!"

"There are no rules!"

"You can't come with us if you're not in character! You can't do this while OOC!"

"I'm not RPing!"

"You need to! It's in the rules!"

"No! I'm not RPing!"

I growled and waved my hand at him. Using the !freeze, !mute, and !gag commands I immobilized him and disabled his ability to argue. After that I quickly went through console and stripped his powers, leaving him absolutely nothing. No commands, no spawning powers, no thinking abilities, no nothing.

I scowled at him. "You aren't allowed to come with us Serpent. You don't have any fucking idea how to RP right."

I looked back to Celestia.

"M'lady, I am sorry for my friend's rashness. He will not be accompanying us on this quest. I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive us," I said, bowing my head.

She smiled at me, putting me at ease instantly. "You are forgiven, my knight."

I bowed deeply before her, spreading my arms out wide. "Then with your permission, my companion and I will be on our way to slay the dragon plaguing these lands."

She put her hoof on my shoulder. "Be safe, my knight."

I raised, smirking at her. "Your fool."

She smirked right back. "My noble fool."

The two of us shared a look of understanding before I left her, taking my companion and leaving her chambers.

As we walked down the torch-lit halls of the keep, I smiled to myself as I pulled down my visor. "Brian, my friend. This could be dangerous. Are you sure you are up for it?"

He pulled his massive battle ax off his back and gave it an experimental swing. It was like it weighed nothing in his hands, even though it was nearly twice as big as he was, and probably just as heavy. "Yes," he said with a nod. "Ve go to mountain und kill big dragon. I am hoping for find much treasure in lair! Vith that, ve vill buy very big home, high up on hill! Then, I vill make many vimen be loving me! All night!" he laughed, slapping me on the back.

I nodded slowly. "Well, I am happy for you, my friend. That sounds like a grand idea indeed! Let us just hope that we live to make use of that loot!" I told him, joking.

He smiled at me knowingly. "Vut vill you use loot for getting, my friend? Perhaps... room at keep? Near to princess, maybe...?"

It was a good thing my visor was down, because he would have seen my eyes go wide otherwise. "N- no! Of course not! I'll use my share to... to... t- to buy a grand house- a mansion! I will host only the grandest of parties, with only the finest of wines and best chefs in the realm! I will put this keep to shame!"

Brian laughed his deep, booming laugh. "I am being sure, my friend! Ven you are getting room, be telling princess I am saying hello!"

I scowled. "Be quiet Brian, nobody likes you."