MLP: Ponies taste like magic

I drive my tail into the changelings head, dropping his body on the cold, hard ground with a thud. I hear clapping from behind as Chrysalis walks up from the wall she was leaning on. She reaches me and stops to look down at me.

"Very good, Ex. I can see how you could of caused Celestia's guards trouble...not that they're much of a threat. But your skill is great." She says. I just hiss at her. She smiles and sends in another changeling. The changelings being sent in are 'rebels'. They, apparently, have broken certain rules of the hive. I'm not sure what the rules were, and frankly I don't care, but it must of been pretty bad for Chrysalis to just send them in without a care.

"This the last one?" I ask. The changeling is naked and armed with his fists. He doesn't stand a chance against me.

"No, we have more. But, this is the last one for today..." Chrysalis says. I smile as I walk up towards him. He's naked remember, so I know he's a male. Anyway, I'm not going to kill him...I'm going to turn him into a face hugger. Just like I've been doing to a few others.

The changeling charges me, trying to use brute strength. I leap to the side just as he reaches me. Before he can turn to me, I pounce on him and pin him to the ground. I then look up at Chrysalis.

"I'm going to turn this one into one of my own." I say. I don't care if this bitch doesn't want me to, I will. Chrysalis just nods. I won't explain the next bit...it's...just no.

I finish my cocoon, it's kinda like the changelings but without the green tint. In but a few hours, he'll become a face hugger. If I play my cards right, I can get a small group of drones, possibly warriors, to help me. Of course I'll have to show my dominance... but considering how I've got the mind of a human and body of a Xenomorph, that won't be to hard.

I leap down from the wall and stand up on two legs as Queen of the whores walk over to me.

"You know, we do a similar thing to ponies. We wrap them in cocoons and change them into changelings." She says.

"Must be ironic, for me to change a changeling." I hiss out. I really hate this bitch. She keeps treating me like a pet and is constantly trying to get me in bed. I already told her I'm genderless...and she just said I still got a tongue. Even thinking about that makes me shiver. But soon I won't need her...

We both walk down the cave, saying nothing...god it's boring.

"...So, what do think about Discord?" I ask. She's clearly made out what she thinks of me...but she hasn't mentioned Discord much.

"Oh, around six-seven inches. He has a lot of enthusiasm, so-"

"No! God! No! I meant, do you find him as useful or something, fucking, sick whore." I say. Chrysalis bursts out into laughter.

"You really need to lighting up and relax. I can take the stress away you know..." She trails of, stroking my head. I feel as she peels some of my head of. She looks surprised.

"Don't worry, my skin is just shedding. I'm 'growing up' I suppose. My skin will come of and my smooth body will become ruff and even more harder. If I'm lucky, my elbows might get sharper, so I can stab with them. I'm becoming a warrior," I say.

"So, what your saying is...I make you harder?" I don't even give her a retort, she crosses her arms at this. I give a ghost of a smile.

'Least I found out how to annoy her.' I think to myself.

We walk into the throne room and see Discord playing poker...with his limbs. I can hear Chrysalis chuckle beside me.

"Discord! Grab your fucking ass, we're doing something for Chrysalis." I say. Discord literally grabs his ass and walks over to us. One of the reasons we're doing 'jobs' for Chrysalis is to prove our 'loyalty'. As if we're actually loyal to her.

"Aw, but I was having so much fun. I even got a few bits." He says, lifting up a bag of bits. I swat the bits out of his hand.

"Discord, we're fucking evil! If we want something, we get it." I say. Discord frowns.

"So, my mission is simple. Theirs a town called Ponyville a little bit away. Bring me some ponies to extract the love from...and I might just 'show' you how happy I am..." She says, putting her hand on her package. Discord goes rock hard but I don't even bat an eye. I can tell this is annoying Chrysalis. She obviously wants to get on my nerves...but it appears to be the other way around.

I wrap my tail around Discord and stand up on my two legs.

" Ponyville. Now," I say. Discord grunts but snaps his fingers anyway. In a flash of light me and Discord are gone. But not before Chrysalis blows us a kiss. Fucking whore.

We appear at the edge of a village, Ponyville most likely. I turn to Discord and he turns to me.

"Alright. Discord, you're a master of chaos. Restrain some ponies, bring them back and we'll leave, "I say. Discord looks at me confused.

"Why didn't we just do that to the changelings?" I sigh.

"Because I need them. They're a perfect specimen for my race to evolve from. They have magic and can change their appearance. The only reason I want Chrysalis dead, is because I just hate her. Besides, I smelt her...she's not all that special. Hell, the other changelings I've sensed show a lot more potential than her. I'm surprised she's still Queen," I explain.

Discord snaps his fingers and teleports away without a word. Just then I sense something land behind me.

"No were to run, no one to help thee." I hear. I turn around and see the whore of the night a few meters from me. Now, I would probably be panicking... but I just so happen to have a face hugger on me. Don't start asking how. I've been changing the changelings to face huggers for a while now, just in case something like this happens. Chrysalis is either too stupid to notice or just didn't comment on me having one on my chest.

I grab it with my tail and slowly walk towards Luna. I can see the arrogance on her face. She also walks forwards, charging a spell in her hands. Remember how Chrysalis said magic won't work one me? That's only part true. Someone as strong as Luna can. That's also how Discord manages to teleport me, he's stronger than Luna and Celestia together.

" Thou should just give up, thou can't win." She says. I snarl and continue walking. She smirks and releases her spell on me. I doge to the side and fling the face hugger at her...she catches it in her magic.

"Ha! Did thou actually think that would work? We know all thy tricks." She says, crushing the face hugger. Before I can blink, she teleports on me and pins me to the ground. She then delivers blow after blow on my face. She's strong enough for it to actually hurt a bit. I can feel my acid blood run from my mouth as she keeps hitting. If this continues...I'll die.

"Move, bitch! Get off my pal!" I hear. Suddenly Luna is flung of me by a gray ball of magic. I get up and see Discord with a bunch of ponies in a bag. I smirk and turn to Luna, her snout is bleeding. She yells in rage and teleports away. I sigh and turn to Discord.

"..."

"So, are you going to say thanks?" He asks taping his foot. I walk up to him and wrap my tail around his waste.

"You can have my reward from Chrysalis when we get back," I say. He smirks and we vanish in a flash of light.