Chapters "Yo, David, you done yet?" Jake said.
"F*CKING STRAPS!" David called back through the door. Jake facepalmed just before the doorbell rang.
"I'll get it." He said. Jake made his way to the door. He found a package addressed to his roommate David. It was Probably that replica cutlass he ordered. certainly looked like it.
"Sword's here." Jake called.
"Aw, sweet!" David said as he charged out of the bathroom. He was clad in replica leather armor from Oblivion and he was wearing a Gray Cowl replica also from Oblivion. David tore into the package with an almost creepy level of gusto. He gave his new potentially dangerous weapon a few test swings. Now that he thought about it, Jake could have sworn the sword look just like the cutlass from the game. The only difference was there was some kind of bird etched on the blade.
"Ni~hi~hice." David said. Then he noticed the bird.
"Hey what's with this bird?" He said as he inspected the carving
"I don't know dude. lets just head for the convention center." Jake said.
At the site of that year's Comic-con, two men showed up one as the Gray Fox, the other as a generic wizard.
"You ready?" David asked.
"Hell yeah!"
END OF EXCERPT
Dagoth Ur recalled his past... How he came to be in Equestria... It all began in another universe...
He remembered buying a mask for a costume he created from a shifty merchant. It look so real. He turned the mask around to try it on...
Dagoth paused the flashback. Dagoth zoomed in on the inside of the forehead, above the third eye-hole. Dagoth saw there was a marking which read: 'Made in Red Mountain'.
"Well played universe." Dagoth said in note.
...The shop keeper was wearing a black, hooded robe but little else he could see.
END OF EXCERPT
Rakdos glared at the Elements of Harmony, more specifically, the "Seventh Element".
"Seventh Element? More like..." Rakdos put on sunglasses. "Seventh Columnist. YEAH~!"
"Laugh it up, Anarchy! I will slay you with the power of-"
"Mind rape? Not gonna happen, brothah. And by the way, it's Rakdos." Rakdos interrupted.
"My name is Anon! I am the long lost Seventh Element of Harmony!" Anon retorted. Rakdos burst out laughing.
"Anon? Really? Oh my god! That's hilarious! HA! What a loser!" Rakdos laughed.
"You won't be laughing when I you my element on you!"
"You're a god damn liability kid. There is no seventh Element of Harmony." Rakdos spat.
"You didn't know it existed, because it's even older than you, and it could only be awakened by a human!"
"Do you even logic, bro? It didn't exist until you came and bent the entire universe over like a free whore. If it did to be honest, the bitch and bastard Nightmare Moon and Discord would still be here." Rakdos said.
"You're just-"
"Preachin' the truth, brothah." Rakdos interrupted.
END OF EXCEPT
Twilight stared at the... Thing before her. It was a symbol resembling a four-leaf clover.
"Wat the fuck r u looking at?" It said in Microsoft Sam Text-To-Speech voice synthesizer.
"Um... What are you?"
"I AM ADOLF HITLER! " It screamed in a new voice.
"Well, um. Mister hit-" Twilight began. She was cut of by 4-Chan's original voice.
"Eugenicists! U r Hitler!" It said to Twilight's confusion.
"But I'm Twilight-" She was cut off again by 4-Chan.
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitlerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"
"My name is-"
"Hitler."
"Twilight Sparkle! My name is Twilight Sparkle!" Twilight said. The entity began to spin idly, processing this new information. Suddenly 4-Chan stopped spinning and said:
"U r a faggot." Twilight facehoofed.
"No. I am a pony. A unicorn to be more specific." 4-Chan began to spin again. This time though, Twilight could faintly see unspeakable horrors of war in the reflected light on it's surface. 4-Chan stopped again, Twilight began to see a pattern. If it was thinking: it spun slowly. Otherwise it just floated there. A new voice:
"HA! GAAAAAAAAY!" Twilight's eye twitched. This thing dared to mock her in her own home. 4-Chan dissolved into a matrix of white 1s and 0s on a black back ground. Said matrix assumed a new form and dissolved away again. A face of some kind, smiling in a ridiculous fashion.
"U mad?" 4-Chan's normal, monotone voice interrupted her thoughts. Her blood began to boil. This thing had insulted her, called her names, charged her for horrible things she didn't do because she tried to speak, just to entertain itself when she got mad. Apparently, it had shifted back to it's normal form while she was lost in thought.
"4-Chan wins! Yay! Yay! Yay!" The robotic voice said.
END OF EXCERPT
