Chapter Two: Chats with a Magical Unicorn(Rewritten)
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Two: Chats with a Magical Unicorn(Rewritten)

*warning, semi clop ahead. Proceed if you dare....*

"If you tell the truth, you dont have to remember anything."
-Mark Twain

Trixie and I are making our way toward her carriage, exhaustion settling in after the emotional roller coaster we both just rode and the effort it took to get me out of the car. It wasn’t easy—definitely a few more blunders than I’d like to admit.

First, Trixie had grabbed one of her fake knives from her magic acts, the kind that bends on impact. She laughed it off, albeit sheepishly, and ran back to grab a real knife from her soot-covered home. When she returned, the knife floated in her blue aura as she concentrated, moving it carefully toward me. But just as the blade touched my seatbelt, the magic aura fizzled out, and the knife dropped, clattering onto the floor.

Trixie blinked, her ears twitching as she frowned. “What...?” She hesitated before trying again, her magic gripping the knife firmly. This time, she seemed more focused, and the aura brightened as she brought it toward me. But once again, the moment the knife made contact with me, the blue glow vanished, and the knife fell.

She stepped back, her eyes narrowing. “Hey, what are you doing?” she demanded, her tone suspicious. “Are you messing with my magic?”

“What? No!” I raised my hands defensively. “I swear, I’m not doing anything. I have no idea why it’s not working.”

Trixie’s eyes flicked between me and the knife, her brow furrowed in confusion. She looked like she was trying to figure out if I was pulling some kind of trick. “This doesn’t make any sense...” she muttered, clearly unsettled.

After a moment of silence, she huffed and rolled her eyes. “Fine. We’ll do this the old-fashioned way.” She leaned down, grabbed the knife with her teeth, and positioned herself beside me. “Hold shtill,” she mumbled through the handle.

I tensed as she sawed through the strap, the knife’s edge grazing my chest a couple of times. It was nerve-wracking, to say the least, but after a few moments, she managed to slice through the fabric, freeing me from the seatbelt.

“Thanks,” I said, rubbing my shoulder where the strap had dug in.

She stepped back, wiping her mouth with the back of her hoof, and gave me a curious look. “Just... don’t do anything weird, okay?”

I nodded, but as we walked toward her carriage, my thoughts raced. Was that because of me? Am I immune to magic? I’d read plenty of fanfics where humans either couldn’t be affected by magic or were hypersensitive to it. If that was the case here, it could either be a blessing or a serious problem down the road.

After finally getting me out of the car, Trixie and I walk in silence, heading toward her carriage. The atmosphere is tense—Trixie keeps glancing over her shoulder at me like she’s expecting me to pull another “trick.” Meanwhile, I’m trying to process everything that just happened. The crash, the dragon, the bizarre immunity to magic...MAGIC! All of it feels surreal, but at least I’m out of that seatbelt.

When we reach her carriage, she casts a spell from her horn, causing small, multi-colored lights to float around her like glowing fireflies. They illuminate the sides of the carriage in a mesmerizing display of flares, casting long shadows on the ground.

Trixie turns back to me, offering a small smile as she lifts her hat off and reaches inside, rummaging around. “Just one moment. I have to find my keys again.” She fumbles for a bit as I wait, looking over the exterior of the carriage. It’s just like the one I remember from the show, down to the small details—the burn marks, the color scheme. The door reaches about eye level for me, so I have to duck a bit to peek in. From outside, it looks cramped, but I can tell it’s still bigger than what the cartoon suggested. It was like...half a studio apartment, or a full-sized New York apartment.

As Trixie opens the door and steps inside, I follow behind, taking a careful look around. Inside, it’s a mess—books scattered across the floor, miniature props hanging from hooks, and a jumble of personal belongings strewn everywhere. Her bed at the end of the carriage is a disaster, with candy wrappers and a few empty wine bottles piled on top. There’s even a picture of a familiar mare with a plum-colored coat on one of the bottles—Berry Punch,. I hesitate, unsure of where to step without crushing something.

“Ed-grrrr...” Trixie tries, her tongue tripping over the unfamiliar sounds before she huffs, clearly annoyed. “Ed-gar.” She gets it right this time and looks at me standing in the doorway, hesitation on my face. “You coming inside, or are you just planning on sleeping outside? I really don’t mind either way, but the dragon might come baaaack~,” she says with a smirk, trying to play it cool.

I raise an eyebrow. “Alright, fine. But don’t come crying to me if I step on your first editions.” I try to match her nonchalance, but honestly, I don’t want to break anything. Books are valuable, even here.

I take a cautious step inside, but as soon as I do, my foot lands on something hard, and I nearly lose my balance. Trixie watches with a bemused expression as I pull my foot back and take a leap over to a relatively clear spot, catching myself against the wall. The place is even messier than I thought.

Books scattered everywhere, props dangling haphazardly from nails in the walls, and an unmade bed littered with bonbon wrappers and empty wine bottles—it’s like a tornado of depression tore through her home. It’s more than a mess; it feels... heavy. Like a snapshot of a life in disarray.

"Jesus, Trixie, how long have you lived like this?” I ask, my voice soft, half-wondering if I’m stepping into something deeper.

Maybe it’s been like this ever since the Amulet Incident. I remember that story—how she was corrupted by power, humiliated, and ultimately defeated. Maybe she never really recovered. Could she have been living out here for years, hidden away in the Everfree, a self-imposed exile out of shame? The thought sends a shiver down my spine. The idea of her isolating herself like this, of being a hermit in her own broken world... It’s too real, and I suddenly feel guilty for intruding.

Trixie raises an eyebrow, studying my face before giving a casual shrug. “About twenty minutes ago, actually. It was pretty clean until the dragon attacked.”

I blinked. “Oh.”

She smirks, enjoying my bewilderment. “What, you thought my butler was on holiday or something?”

I laugh, feeling like an idiot. “No, no. I just... thought maybe...” I trail off, cringing inwardly. I thought she might be living out here alone, struggling. Glad to see she's alright, I guess.

Trixie rolls her eyes, letting out a sigh. "Well, since you seem so concerned about the state of my humble home, let’s make it more... presentable. Count to ten in your head for me, Ed-gar.”

I give her a quizzical look but nod. “Uh, okay.”

“Start... now,” she instructs as her horn begins to glow. The soft, blue light intensifies, enveloping the entire room. Objects start to float off the ground, suspended mid-air like they’re caught in a magical breeze. Books rise from their haphazard stacks, slowly sorting themselves by size and color before slotting back into the miniature bookshelf. The empty wine bottles gather themselves into a neat row on a nearby counter, while wrappers and other small debris float toward a wastebasket that’s practically overflowing.

Props and tools whirl around like they’re part of some bizarre, magical tornado before they neatly attach themselves back to their designated hooks on the wall. The bed at the far end of the carriage transforms from a chaotic tangle of sheets into a neatly folded arrangement, the star-patterned comforter smoothed out with precision.

I watch, genuinely impressed. The mess is disappearing in a matter of seconds. By the time I get to seven in my head, the room is nearly spotless, the only sound being the gentle hum of Trixie’s magic as it continues its work. At nine, she’s sweating a little, but she’s clearly determined to finish.

By the time I mentally hit ten, she’s still going, giving one final flick of her horn as she lifts a stray feather duster into place. She takes a deep breath and lets the magic fade, the blue glow vanishing as everything settles. It’s an impressive sight—she’s managed to organize her entire living space in record time. I glance down at my watch, noting that it actually took her twelve seconds, but... well, close enough.

"Wow," I say, offering an enthusiastic nod. "That was ten seconds flat."

Trixie beams, her chest puffing up a little as she accepts the compliment. "Well, they don’t call me the Great and Powerful Trixie for nothing. I can do more than just household spells, you know."

“Seriously, that was amazing. You cleaned this place faster than it’d take four Consuelas.” I grin, taking in the now-organized room. The interior looks almost cozy now, with its warm, magical lighting and the neatly arranged trinkets giving it a quaint, homey feel.

Trixie tips her hat with a smug grin. “Naturally.” She trots over to a cupboard and pulls out a bottle of wine, holding it up with her magic. The label reads Exquisite Berry™, Year 1 A.L.R., and the elegant design catches the light, making it look even more luxurious.

“Do you mind if I have a drink?” she asks, raising an eyebrow. “It’s been... quite the day.”

I shake my head. “Go ahead.”

She smirks, pouring herself a glass. The wine’s rich, deep red color catches the glow of the nearby lanterns. As she pours another glass, she floats it over to me, but then she pauses, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. “Wait a second... are you even old enough to drink? I’ve seen minotaurs bigger than you who were still practically calves.”

I blink, caught off guard. “Uh... I’m eighteen.”

Trixie raises an eyebrow. “Eighteen? And that’s old enough for your kind?”

I hesitate, rubbing the back of my neck. “Well, technically... not yet back home. I'm an adult, but drinking is for twenty-one and up. Other countries don't care, but if this place is the same, I’ll take water or something.”

She rolls her eyes, her smirk returning. “Oh, please. Eighteen’s perfectly fine in Equestria. Besides,” she continues, her tone playful as she swirls her glass, “We just survived a dragon encounter together. What happens in the Everfree will stay in the Everfree.” She levitates the glass the rest of the way toward me, her smirk daring me to take it.

I can’t help but grin a little as I take the glass from her magic before it gets too close. “Fair enough.”

Trixie nods approvingly and takes a sip of her own glass. “Mmm, it’s not the best age, but it’ll do.” She settles down on a cushion, letting out a sigh as she relaxes.

I follow her lead, taking a sip. The wine has a smooth, slightly tangy taste, with a pleasant berry kick. It’s better than I expected. “Not bad. Haven't had much except on trips to Wisconsin. You can drink there if a parent is watching you.” I glance around the Clean and Sanitary wagon, noticing things I hadn’t before. With the clutter gone, the small details stand out—the purple bedspread adorned with star patterns and the neatly organized magical trinkets on the shelves.

The place feels cozy now, with the soft glow from the lanterns and the fireplace casting warm shadows across the room. Despite the craziness of the day, for the first time in a while, I feel myself relax.

Wait, fireplace???

“Uh, Trixie? Is that... a fireplace?”

She follows my gaze and gives a nonchalant nod.

“Yep. Something wrong?" Trixie asks as she pours herself other glass of wine.

I stare at it, getting more and more concerned. "But... this is a wooden carriage!?! Fire BURNS wood!"

Trixie looks at me with a perfectly straight face. “Do you really want to know?”

I nod, curiosity getting the better of me.

She leans in close, her muzzle right next to my ear. “Magic,” she whispers, her voice dripping with mock seriousness. Then she waves her hooves dramatically, like she’s casting a spell. “Oooooh~”

I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Yeah, okay, I walked into that one.”

As we sip our wine, I glance around the cozy, lantern-lit interior, and that’s when I notice the small fireplace flickering away in the corner. “Hey, Trixie,” I say, genuinely curious. “Is the fire enchanted or... is it the carriage itself?”

Trixie raises an eyebrow, looking at me with mild suspicion. “Why do you ask?”

I shrug, taking another sip of my wine. “Well, your magic kind of... fizzled out when you tried to cut me loose earlier. But now, it’s working fine here. I’m sitting inside your carriage, so why isn’t it happening again?”

She freezes, her eyes darting to the fireplace as the glow reflects off her face. For a moment, the soft light feels almost ominous. “Hold on a second...” she mutters. She leans in to inspect the flames, squinting as if trying to see something hidden within them. Her eyes widen as the flames appeared to slowly grow. “Oh, horseapples!”

She started pouring her wine into the fireplace to douse the small fire before it started to spread too much. Luckily it was contained to the wooden fireplace, but as the wine extinguishes the flames with a loud hiss, the interior of the wagon filled with a thin cloud of smoke, making it hard to breathe.

Trixie immediately jumps into action, using her magic to fling open a small window and grabbing a nearby rag to fan the smoke out. We both cough as the fumes swirl around the confined space.

“Trixie turns to me, her eyes accusing. “You just had to come inside, didn’t you?!” she snaps, waving the rag with one hoof while trying to air out the smoke. “I bet it’s you messing with my magic again!”

“It's not like I'm trying! You invited me in!” I shoot back, holding up my hands. I cough into my sleeve, squinting through the haze. I pause, glancing around the carriage. “Where was the smoke going in the first place? I didn’t see a chimney or anything.”

***Meanwhile, on a Looney-tunes level caricature of an Indigenous Zebra Island***

“Beanie beanie wama ticka haha!” a zebra tribesmare shouts, pointing her hoof at the nearby volcano as smoke billows from its top. “(Oh no, the great juju of the mountain has awoken!)”

The village’s witch doctor nods solemnly, his hooves clinking with the bones of his ceremonial attire. “Ooh Eeh Ooh Ah Aah Ting Tang, Walla Walla Bing Bang~♬Whoa-OH, Black BETTY! Bam-ba-lam♬” He declares, shaking his staff. “(It is time to find a virgin to sacrifice. Go find Betty. If she isn’t one, then no pony on the Black Archipelago is.)”

“Boom-Shakaka aloha bow-chica-wow wow, durka durka Obla-Di Obla-Da Ramma Lamma Ding Ding,” the tribesmare agrees, nodding. “(Okay.)”

***Back at Trixie’s Carriage***

Trixie shrugs as she continues fanning, the smoke finally starting to thin out. “You know what? It’s probably best not to think about it.” She gives me a sheepish grin.

After the smoke finally clears, Trixie looks relieved, and we both settle down again. She takes off her hat and hangs it on a hook by the door before lounging on a cushion near a small bookshelf, casually levitating a new bottle of wine from a small wooden crate tucked under her bed. I notice that the crate is half-full, with a few other identical bottles neatly lined up.

She pops the cork with her magic and pours herself another glass, then glances at the crate with a sigh. “Ugh, I really need to make a stop soon to restock.” She takes a sip, swirling the wine lazily. “It’s a pain when you live out here. Finding a good seller who doesn’t charge you a hoof and a horn is practically impossible.”

I watch as she relaxes, her movements smoother and more controlled now that she’s had a moment to recover. "Sounds like you’ve got this all figured out,” I comment, trying to lighten the mood.

Trixie snorts softly. “You have no idea.” She pauses for a moment, her gaze turning thoughtful as she glances at the remaining bottles. “Gotta keep the essentials on hoof. You never know when you’ll need a good drink to wind down.” She raises her glass in a mock toast before taking another sip.

I nod, raising my own glass in response. Yay. Sophistication.

Trixie leans back, settling into her cushion as she swirls the wine, clearly more at ease now. She glances at me over the rim of her glass, a faint smirk playing on her lips. “Now, let’s get one thing straight.” Her tone shifts, becoming slightly more serious. “About that little stunt with the dragon—pretty impressive. I didn’t think you’d actually pull it off.”

I shrug, trying to play it cool. “Just thinking on my feet—or wheels, I guess.” I chuckle awkwardly. “It was either that or get fried. Figured I had nothing to lose.”

Trixie nods thoughtfully, setting her glass down. “Well, it worked. The Great and Powerful Trixie is not easily impressed, you know.” She gives me a wink, but her expression quickly sobers. “But... now that we’ve had a moment to relax, there’s something I want to know.”

The atmosphere shifts, and I can feel her eyes on me, studying my reaction. I tilt my head, feigning ignorance. “Oh? And what’s that?”

Trixie narrows her eyes, her ears twitching slightly. “You called me by my name before I ever said it.” Her voice is calm but firm, the suspicion creeping back in. “How do you know who I am?”

I hesitate, searching for the right words. “I mean... you introduced yourself back there, right? In the car?” I say, trying to sound casual. “The whole third-person thing... kinda hard to miss.”

Trixie’s eyes stay narrowed, but she doesn’t interrupt, waiting for me to continue.

I force a smile, shrugging like it’s no big deal. “Honestly, I thought it was kinda cute. Your voice... it’s got that confident, assertive vibe.” Her ears twitch, but she stays silent, so I keep going. “It actually reminded me of this girl I knew back when I was younger...Marie... Kanker! We grew up in the same Cul-De-Sac.”

Trixie raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “"Marie Kanker?”

I feel my face heat up as I realize I’m caught. But instead of backing down, I double down. “Okay, fine. We didn’t exactly grow up together in the Cul-De-Sac. I grew up there, and Marie and her two sisters lived in a trailer park just outside the neighborhood.” I pause, gauging her reaction before quickly adding, “A trailer’s like a mobile home, kinda like your wagon here.”

Trixie’s ears twitch again, and she tilts her head, her expression still guarded but with a flicker of interest. “Trixie knows what a trailer is.”

I nod, trying to look as genuine as possible. “Yeah, it's exactly like that. She was... very assertive. Kinda like you, but too much so. And her voice was just sooo scratchy. Your voice is much more pleasant to listen to.” I chuckle awkwardly, hoping it comes off as sincere.

For a moment, she looks taken aback. A small blush creeps onto her cheeks, barely noticeable under the dim glow of her lanterns. I catch it, and it throws me off a bit. I clear my throat, trying to shake the awkwardness.

Trixie eyes me for a moment, her gaze shifting between skepticism and curiosity. “Hmm... if you say so.” She still doesn’t look entirely convinced, and there’s that same flicker of suspicion in her eyes.

I’m about to change the subject when Trixie’s expression suddenly shifts, her eyes narrowing as she furrows her brow. “Wait a minute!” She points a hoof at me, her voice rising. “I saw what you just did! That still doesn’t explain how you called me into your contraption by name before I even said my name!”

Well shit...she's right.

Alright, THINK! She’s already suspicious of me, and if I bring up her past, it’ll just make things worse. Like it or not, she’s my best shot at getting out of the Everfree in one piece. And before you start thinking, ‘Edgar, you handsome genius, you know everything—why not just tell her the truth?’ well, I’ll tell you why: it’s insane. I can’t just walk up to her and say, ‘Hey, I know everything about you and your world because you’re all fictional characters from a kids' show back where I’m from.’ She’d probably think I’m a lunatic or a stalker—or worse. And don’t even get me started on trying to explain clop. Yeah, no thanks. That’s a disaster waiting to happen.

I glance around the cozy carriage, the warm light from the lanterns casting long shadows on the walls. The silence feels heavier as I think about how to respond. Just as I open my mouth, I hear it again—faint, but distinct. A slow, haunting melody with a piano and deep, resonant notes. It’s almost familiar, like something you’d hear in a detective movie—a slow, deliberate tune that sounds like it’s unraveling some deep mystery.

I blink and shake my head, trying to focus. What the hell? The melody grew louder, and it’s as if it’s right in the room with us. “Hey, do you hear that?” I ask, my eyes darting around the small space. The music seems to seep into the air, each note just barely there. There wasn't even an echo...it was just there.

Trixie’s eyes narrow even further, and she lets out an annoyed huff. “Oh, nice try, Mister! You’re not changing the subject again."

“No, seriously!” I insist, feeling a mix of confusion and unease. “It sounds like... like music. A piano, and—”

Trixie waves a hoof dismissively. “You must think I’m an idiot. Trixie doesn’t hear anything.” Her tone sharpens as she glares at me. “If this is another one of your tricks, then you’re going to find yourself outside with the timberwolves.”

I open my mouth to protest, but I know it’s pointless. Trixie’s expression makes it clear she’s had enough of my evasions. The music fades, and I force myself to refocus. Okay, okay, she doesn’t hear it. Fine, just go with something she’ll buy.

Ok, think Eddy! What would Jack Sparrow do? Drink? I've been doing that and it hasn't been helping. Lie? I already established that I'm going to do that. I just don't know how I'm going to lie good enough to fool her. Engage in a sword fight?

...maybe.

Suddenly, an idea hits me. Maybe I can use her pride to my advantage. I force a grin, leaning forward. “Well, of course I know you! I mean, who hasn’t heard of the Great and Powerful Trixie?”

Trixie blinks, her suspicion momentarily giving way to a spark of interest. “Go on...” she says, her tone cautious but intrigued.

I nod enthusiastically, trying to keep up the act and leaning into the rumors and stories I remember. “Oh, you know, all over!” I say with a grin dripping with charm. “I heard about that time with the Ursa Minor—how you faced it down! You're the bravest Unicorn in the Everfree.”

Trixie’s ears perk up, but her eyes remain guarded. She doesn’t confirm or deny it, though her face does flush slightly. It’s hard to tell if it’s a blush of pride or embarrassment, but I press on, pretending not to notice.

You're a genius Edgar. No woman can resist your corny flattery. All you gotta do is be the wandering idiot who hasn't heard about the Alicorn Amulet or the fact that it was Twilight that took it down. She's too prideful to try and correct me!

“Then there’s that story about the fireworks you managed to set off in front of the Saddle Arabian diplomats.” I give her my best look of admiration. “You're not just great or powerful—you’re amazing! I mean, pulling off something like that takes skill.”

Her expression softens as her eyes widen a little. For a moment, she looks genuinely flattered, her chest puffing out and a smile creeping onto her lips. Her blush deepens, and for a second, I think I’ve managed to pull it off.

But then her eyes narrow again, suspicion returning. “Wait... I never took down an Ursa. In fact, I've never even talked about or bragged about an Ursa minor. Only an Ursa Major. The only ponies who would know it was actually an Ursa Minor..."

"Uhh, maybe I should go outside and grab some things from my car? I got a solar battery pack that I might want to plug my phone into before really hit the hay." I tried deflecting, but Trixie was on a mission.

"...Are ponies that know the truth and the ones I almost enslaved using a cursed magical amulet!" She says, her voice taking on a sharper edge.

"...Wow Trixie, you enslaved a town? I am so appalled at you that the only way I can forgive you is if we drop the subject."

“And nopony else knows about those fireworks... I did that for one pony!" She narrowed her eyes.

I miscalculated. She's not a typical woman who would fall for corny flattery. She's a mare.

My heart sinks. “[Speech 50/65]Uh... well, maybe it’s a small world after all?” I offer, feeling my confidence waver.

[Speech check failed]

She shakes her head, her eyes sharp and unyielding. “Nice try, but Trixie isn’t easily fooled. In fact, she has even more questions.” She steps closer, her eyes locked onto mine, searching for any hint of deception. “How do you really know all this?” Her voice carries a weight, the suspicion evident as she narrows her eyes. “You knew about Ponyville, fine, but how do you know about the fireworks incident? Nopony should know about that—nopony except one unicorn. This is your last chance, Edgar. I want The Truth!”

My mind races, and before I can think it through, I shout, “You can’t handle the truth!” The words burst out, loud and forceful. As soon as they leave my mouth, I feel a wave of embarrassment crash over me. Seriously? Why did I have to quote that movie now? My face heats up, and I cringe, rubbing my neck awkwardly. Fucking Theatre instincts!

Trixie’s eyes widen, and she takes a cautious step back, grabbing a knife from a nearby shelf. She holds it out in front of her with both hooves, extending it straight at me as if to keep me at a distance. The blade points directly at me, and for a moment, I freeze, my eyes locked onto it. I can’t tell if it’s real or not, and the tension in the air feels sharp.

“Hey, whoa, wait a sec,” I stammer, raising my hands in a calming gesture. My heart skips a beat, and my voice drops a notch. “I didn’t mean anything by it. I swear.”

Trixie’s ears twitch, and her gaze shifts between me and the knife, her posture tense. “What are you—what’s that supposed to mean?” she demands, her voice steady but edged with uncertainty. She’s studying me closely, trying to figure out if I’m a threat.

I swallow hard, my mind scrambling for an explanation. “Uh, okay, that... that didn’t come out right.” I force an awkward smile, still keeping my hands up. “It’s... it’s a quote from back home, from a courtroom drama movie. People back on Earth use it as a joke when someone says they want the truth.” I chuckle nervously, trying to defuse the tension. “Didn’t think it’d come off so... intense. I’m really sorry. I was being really REALLY stupid. I was just acting like a theatre kid.”

Trixie’s eyes flick between me and the knife, her breathing steady but her expression still guarded. Slowly, her eyes drop to the knife, and she frowns, giving the blade a little wiggle. Her horn lit, and the knife tip bent in an almost comical arc. “Oh, great... this thing again.” Trixie sighs, her shoulders slowly relaxing as she sets the knife down on the counter. Her ears droop, and she mutters, “I really need to stop grabbing this. It’s just a prop from my acts, but it does look real at first glance.” She gives the knife a small, half-hearted nudge, as if irritated with herself. “Not exactly intimidating, huh?”

I let out a slow breath, realizing I’ve been holding it. When she puts the knife down, a wave of embarrassment hits me, but I also feel a bit of relief. Nice going, Edgar. First day here, and you’re already making yourself look like a lunatic. I rub the back of my neck, feeling the tension drain as I meet her eyes. “I really didn’t mean to freak you out, and I’m sorry for making you grab it in the first place. I should’ve thought before speaking.”

Her eyes soften slightly, and she offers a small, hesitant smile. “Well, maybe just... don’t do things like that with somepony you just met. Especially when you’re tall and have that kind of voice,” she mutters, her tone a mix of annoyance and lingering curiosity. “And apparently immune to magic too, which makes things even weirder.”

I manage a sheepish grin. “Yeah, fair point... and common sense. It was almost reflex, honest. I'm just glad you didn't give me a heart attack and actually try to stab me.”

Trixie chuckles awkwardly. “I'm glad I didn't either... I'd be having one as well when it doesn't work.”

I laugh, relieved.

Trixie’s ears flick back, and she gives me a long, scrutinizing look. Her eyes narrow again, but there’s a flicker of something else—curiosity mixed with disbelief. “Wait, hold on... from your world?” She does a double-take, her eyes widening slightly. “What do you mean, your world?”

I feel a chill run down my spine as the moment hangs in the air. "You are really good at catching that stuff..." She’s put the pieces together faster than I’d like, and I've seen what dodging does. “Yeah,” I admit, the word coming out like a sigh. “I'm not from around these parts.”

Trixie’s eyes widen further, and she pulls back slightly, as if needing to process what she’s hearing. “Another... you're from another world?” Her tone is caught between amazement and skepticism. “And you know about little old me?” she asks, her voice dropping in pitch as she leans forward. “You know about Equestria?”

I swallow, feeling the weight of the situation pressing down on me. “I do,” I say slowly, meeting her gaze. “I know about you, and... I know about this place—Equestria.” The words hang in the air between us, and I feel the tension build, like the moment before a curtain rises on a stage. “There’s a lot I could explain, but...” I trail off, seeing the mix of emotions cross her face. “Trixie, I know it sounds crazy, but—”

“Wait,” Trixie interrupts, lifting a hoof to silence me, her eyes locked onto mine. She’s not scared, just... processing. There’s confusion, skepticism, and maybe even a touch of curiosity in her expression. She lets out a slow breath, and her gaze shifts from me to the crate she pulled out earlier.

Without another word, she grabs the glass she had filled earlier and downs it in one go, her eyes briefly shutting as if she’s trying to swallow more than just the wine. She sets the empty glass down with a soft clink on the small table off to the side, then she focuses on the crate. The lantern light catches the sheen of the bottles as she takes one out, pops the cork, and takes a long swig directly from it, keeping the bottle close this time.

“This is... a lot to take in,” she says bluntly, her tone flat but her eyes still brimming with skepticism. “First, a dragon. Then you knowing things—A lot of things...and now you’re telling me you’re from another world.” She takes another swig, then rests the bottle beside her as she looks into the middle distance, her voice softening. “The weirdest thing is that my magic doesn’t work on you... That just doesn’t happen.” She shakes her head, almost like she’s arguing with herself. “Everything in Equestria can be affected by magic in one way or another. Everything. It's weird. You're weird. A big weirdo...”

I sit back on the cushion. I’ve got no good explanation for it. “Yeah, I... noticed that too. It’s surprising.”

Trixie glances over at me, then pulls another bottle from the crate. She floats it over, the blue aura flickering as it nears me. I catch it before the magic fades completely, and she gives me a determined look. “If we’re doing this, we’re gonna be on equal ground.” She smirks, the expression half-joking but with a serious undertone. “Here. It’s grape-flavored,” she says dryly. “That's a joke. It's wine.”

I can’t help but snort a little at the blunt reveal. “Thanks for the heads-up,” I reply, tugging at the cork and managing to pop it off with a small pop as the scent of grape fills the air. “You sure you want to hear this?”

“Yes.” She holds her bottle close, resting her forehooves on it as she leans forward. “No more dodging. No more jokes. Tell me everything, Edgar.”

I nod, taking a deep breath before lifting the bottle to my lips. “Alright... here goes nothing.”

After four hours of explanations, two and a half more wine bottles, and two cheese sandwiches (hey, even magical ponies get hungry), I’ve finally managed to give Trixie the rundown on everything I know. It really shouldn’t have taken this long, but every explanation spiraled into more questions. Then there was the panic attack—apparently, finding out that you’re being watched by thousands of hairless monkeys from another dimension is a lot to handle. Who knew?

It took half a bottle of wine to calm her down and stop her from trying to stuff every napkin she had into a crevice where "the monkeys" could have been watching from, and another half to get her curious enough to start asking about my world. Judging by Trixie's prior complaint of thinking she was being watched during "private moments", I made sure to make sure that I left out the mention of the "art". It still seemed like a good idea.

By the time we both settled down, we realized we might be the first beings to make interdimensional contact.

Trixie was no longer sitting across from me. Instead, she's laying beside me, now sprawled out on her cushion while she waves her hooves dramatically. her eyes half-lidded as she stares at me with an alcohol h flushed face. “S-So, you’re telling Trixie that... thousands—no, Billions—of hairless monkeys have been watching her? Watching us? All this time?”

I bite my lip, holding back a laugh. “We've already established that. Maybe not billions, since the numbers were probably between a few thousand to one million. But it’s not just you—they watched everypony, and we've only ever seen the super kid—er, foal-friendly content."

Trixie squints, her eyes struggling to focus through the haze. “And... and what about the... other embarrassing schtuff?” she slurs, waving her hoof in a circle. “Did they see every time Trixie... fell off her wagon? Or...” She hesitates, frowning as her ears flick back. “Or when I tripped over my cape in the middle of my very first magic show—ugh!” She shudders, clearly mortified. “Or... that time I shoved all the napkins in the dispenser into my hat before leaving Hayburger in Manehatten?”

I hold back a chuckle, seeing how self-conscious she’s getting. “Well, they probably missed some things. It’s not like they see everything. Mostly, it’s the big events, but you are the favorite of a lot of the fandom. I'm sure you got a few of your own fan-clubs, where they make up stories and adventures you go on. They really like your personality.” I try to sound reassuring, though her concern is genuinely kind of endearing. "Even if they saw the napkin thing, they'd probably think you're thrifty. "

She narrows her eyes, her expression now a blend of suspicion and tipsy amusement. “Hmph. Then they have good taste... at least somepony appreciates the talent that is Moi.” She puffs up slightly, then her bravado softens before she lowers her head… onto my lap.

"Uh...Trixie?" I blinked, caught off-guard by the sudden move, but she just sighed contentedly, as if this is completely normal.

"Mmmm?" She hummed.

"N-nothing." I said. I guess ponies don't mind being close?

On instinct, I reach out to gently pat her head. It felt natural to do, like petting a cat, or the Boxer I had as a kid. Her mane is soft under my fingers, and on another impulse, I give her a light scratch behind the ears.

Trixie tensed, her ears flicking, and I brace myself, worried I might have overstepped.

Then, her expression softens, and a surprised smile spreads across her face. She lets out a slow groan, then relaxes, melting further into me as she nuzzled into her my legs as her eyes flutter shut. “Ooooh… Trixie… likesh that,” she murmurs, her voice almost dreamy. “That… that's nice.”

My hand moves to scratch behind her ear and then trails down to the back of her jaw. Her breath hitches slightly, and she leans into my touch, practically purring.

“You know,” she says, her voice a little drowsy and dreamy, “I may need to keep you around… for all these scritches… and massages.”

I chuckle softly, feeling the warmth of her head on my lap. “Oh yeah? Sure you’re not just saying that because of the wine?” I try to keep my tone light, though I can’t ignore the cozy warmth of the moment.

She shakes her head, her mane brushing against my hand. “No, I'm serious.” She grins up at me, eyes glinting with tipsy mischief. “You’re so good at it. Maybe you can get a job as a massage monkey. A Masseuse!” she giggles, her laugh carrying that same lightness that only slightly tipsy people have. "~A Mare-Seuess..."

“Oh, really? A ‘Mare-Seuess’?” I can’t help but laugh, her infectious humor getting the best of me. “I think that’s a fair trade,” I say, my fingers moving from her ear to the back of her jaw. She tilts her head again, practically purring as I scratch, her mane falling softly across her face. I roll my eyes. “It'd be nice to get paid for this. It'd be easy to make money while I think of a way back home...” I say, the weight of it settling in my voice as the reality sinks in again.

...How the hell do I get back?

It’s only now, with Trixie curled up and sighing against me, that I feel it: this nagging, feeling. I don’t even know how I got here. The drive home, the car crash, the light… it all feels too surreal. I must have somehow crossed into a completely different dimension—a different world. And for the first time, I feel a chill at the thought. What if I’m stuck here? Really stuck?

My whole life back home just flashes in front of me: my friends, my family… all of it on the other side of some unseen barrier. The possibility of never going back settles into my mind, sending a strange numbness through me.

She gives me a half-lidded smile, but it starts to fade.

“Y-you're worried...about your home?” she asks, her voice tinged with curiosity and something else—something softer. “What if you’re shtuck here... forever?”

I hesitate, looking away for a moment. “I dunno... I hope I can get home. But... if I’m stuck here... I guess I’ll have to figure something out.”

Trixie blinked up at me, her eyes gleaming under the low lights, her expression flickering to something more serious and determined. She let out a huff and shook her head, squeezing her eyes closed as she started to mutter to herself, “Think, think, think...” She tapped her hoof on her temple in rhythm with her chant, then suddenly, she opened her eyes, grinning widely.

“A-ha! Trixie has a genius, ingenious... shmart idea!” She giggled, waving a hoof with a flourish as if she’d just solved everything. “Ah-ha! There’sh thish purple pony in Ponyville... I was headed there anyway, so you’ll just come with me! It’s about a day’sh travel from here, but she knows Princess Shhellestia-... Princess Cssssss-... Princess Shunbutt! And... if anypony can get you home, it’sh her. She knows everything.”

I laugh at her nickname for Celestia. “Princess Sunbutt, huh? That’s... brilliant.” I can’t help but grin. “You’re a genius, Trixie.”

She beams, clearly pleased with herself. “Of COURSE I am! I'm the greatest.” she declares, her chest puffing out. “It’s... it’s the only logical plan.” She hiccups, then giggles. “Sunbutt will help. Hehe... Shunbutt.”

I laugh with her, the absurdity of the situation settling in. But then, a thought I’ve been pushing aside surfaces, and my smile fades a little. “I really hope she can help... I don’t know how I’m going to get home.” My voice drops, and I feel the weight of the reality pressing down. “I don’t wanna be stuck here forever, you know? I have... things back home.”

Trixie’s expression softens, and she squeezes my arm gently. “You’ll get back... Trixie promises.” Her voice is a little more serious now. “But... you know...” She hesitates, her eyes meeting mine. “If... if you have to shtay... it might not be so bad anyway.” She says, her words slow and sincere. “Trixie thought she was going to go... bonkers, hearing about all these magical, unmagical monkeys. But... you made it... not so bad.” Her eyes lock onto mine, the sincerity there evident. “I’m... serious.”

The words catch me off guard, and for a moment, I feel my chest tighten. “I’m glad, Trixie.” I murmur, feeling her warm weight against me. “I’m really glad.”

She lifts her head to look at me, her eyes a little more focused. “You’re...” she whispers, her hoof tracing circles over my arm, lingering longer than before...before moving my hand back to the top of her head and giving me a squinty-eyed pout. "You're stopping. Trixie didn't say stop."

I chuckled, understanding the message completely as I continue scratching her, my fingers moving through her mane and down to the base of her ears. Trixie’s breaths grow softer, and her body relaxes completely against mine. “Mmm, Ed-gar... your claws... they’re magic.” She whispers, her voice tinged with contentment as scooched closer and pressed herself against my midsection now. “I could get used to this.”

I smile down at her, watching her eyelids drooping with contentment. “Trixie, you’re drunk and adorable.”

Trixie looks up at me with a sleepy smile, her eyes half-closed. “Nuh-uh. You’re just that good...if only you went a bit lower...” she mumbles, her words softening as sleep starts to pull at her. I went ahead and obliged, kneading the neck muscle on her back with one hand. She lets out a low, soft groan. “That's the stuff...I could fall asleep right here..."

For a moment, she stays like this, her head resting against my lap, her breaths soft and steady as she relaxes completely against me. My fingers drift through her mane and down to the base of her ear, her body shifting closer as she practically purrs, eyes shut in contentment as she let out a shiver.

After a long moment, I shift, and she opens her eyes again, lifting her head to look up at me. “Oh!” she says suddenly, as if realizing something. “Where… where are you gonna to sleep?” She blinks up at me, as if only just processing it.

I glance around, feeling a bit more self-conscious under her gaze. “I... hadn’t actually thought that far ahead,” I admit. “But if you don't have a spot, maybe I can sleep in my car if you don't have a spot—”

Trixie cuts me off, her eyes widening. “Oh, no, no, no!” she exclaims, standing up abruptly. The sudden movement makes her wobble, and she steadies herself, her eyes still on me. “Trixie cannot have you sleeping in your car, or outside, or... somewhere else. No. You’re... you’re a guest. A guest of Trixie's..." she says with a bright, mischievous smile, her voice softening to a playful lilt. “And guests get the bed.”

I blink, half-stunned by her boldness. “W-wait, what? Your bed?”

She gives me a knowing look, inching closer, her hoof brushing against my hand. “Yes,” she says, drawing out the word. “Get up!"

Before I know it, Trixie leaned in and took my hand in her teeth, causing me to yelp in anticipation of the pain. Her bite... is surprisingly gentle but firm as she tugs me up from where I’m sitting, her eyes glinting with amusement. “C'mon, Ed-gar,” she mumbles around my hand. She lets out a soft, muffled laugh against my hand, her breath warm against my skin as she pulled backward, guiding me toward the bed. Her cheeks are flushed, her gaze playful as she leads me along with that little nip, guiding me closer with each step.

The bed is twin-sized for me, and its light purple sheets are adorned with star patterns that shimmer faintly in the dim light. It’s surprisingly tidy, even after the cluttered state of the rest of the carriage. There’s just enough room for one person to stretch out, maybe two if they’re close. The mattress feels firm yet soft enough to sink into, and I spot the same star-covered comforter neatly folded at the end. The pillow is plump, almost inviting, and I note the faint scent of lavender clinging to the sheets, mingling with the cozy warmth of the fireplace.

Trixie gives me a nudge, breaking my thoughts. “Lay down... muzzle up. Not gonna lay on your back.” she instructs, her tone both casual and mischievous.

"What was that?"

She gently pushes me with her hoof and I comply, laying back on the bed. The mattress dips slightly under my weight, and I adjust myself, trying to get comfortable.

“There... you’ll be my... big pillow tonight,” she declares with a grin, her eyes bright with the glow of the lanterns. “We sh-saved each other... so thish is how can pay each other back.” She giggles, and the warmth in her voice is almost contagious. “Only got one blanket for me, so I'll cuddle with you for warmth.”

As I settle in, her words seem strangely convincing, like a fuzzy logic that feels too comfortable to argue against. “Well, I guess I can’t find any flaw in that plan.”

She beams, grabbing her blanket and climbing onto the bed beside me and snuggling close, having all of her legs straddling me on either side in a hug.

I continue to scratch her head and ears as she leans further into me, her mane brushing against my chest. She lets out a soft sigh, her body pressing into mine as she makes herself comfortable. “Mmm... Ed-gar.” Her breath is warm against my neck, and the smell of wine and berries fills the air.

As I adjust to get comfortable, she moves, her body pressing closer until, accidentally, I shift against her and her breath suddenly hitched in a gasp. Her hips press against mine and her pelvis accidentally rubbed against me. I could feel her even through the fabric of our clothes.

Her breath hitches, and she pauses, her eyes flicking up to meet mine with a startled but curious look. “Edgar...” she whispers, her voice barely a breath, caught between surprise and intrigue.

"S-Sorry!" I panicked a bit, but...she didn't look mad.

She tilts her head, her eyes trailing down our bodies where we’re pressed together. “You know... even though you’re taller... we fit just right like this.” Her voice is soft, almost thoughtful, as if she’s realizing something for the first time.

“Uh... Trixie?” I ask, feeling my heart start to race as the implications hang in the air.

She shifts again, her body pressing into mine deliberately, her hips finding that spot against my own, and a small smile plays at the corners of her mouth. “It's just funny...” she whispers, her breath a soft murmur against my chest. “We barely know each other... and you're a giant...You saved me... a-and I saved you...”

A warm, musky scent fills my senses. It’s sweet, different from the grape of the wine. It’s like berries—raspberries or... Trix cereal? The aroma is intoxicating, and it’s coming from her, mixing and mingling with the lavender, wine, and warmth of the sheets.

Her hoof gently touches my cheek, her eyes meeting mine with a soft, curious gaze. “Now we're drunk. And now...” she murmurs, her words slurring but her eyes shining with an intensity that seems to cut through the haze. “And now... we’re here.” She presses into me, the warmth between us growing. “In my bed.”

I swallow, feeling a rush of heat in my face. “Trixie, I...” My voice trails off, the words fading into the warm silence that hangs between us.

She smiles, a soft, almost dreamlike expression. “It's weird, right? Having a stallion in my bed, and not doing anything but sleeping?” She sighs, her breath warm and soft against my chest. “It’s nice though...”

I'm not sure if it's the wine or the moment, but I can't help but agree. “Yeah... it is nice,” I mumble, feeling the warmth of her against me.

Her tail flicks, and her gaze drops to where we’re joined, her eyes half-lidded in the dim light. “But I can't sleep...thinking it could be even better with us.” she whispers, her breath warm and soft.

Her hips rock again, and I can feel her moving, the friction between us sending a jolt through me, and her breath catches in a gasp, her eyes widening as she feels the same.

“O-oh...” she murmurs, her gaze locking onto mine, and there’s a flicker of something deep and unspoken in her eyes, a mix of curiosity and uncertainty. Her ears flick, her cheeks flush. “That was... unexpected...”

“Trixie...what are you doing?” I whisper, her name falling softly from my lips, and her breath hitches...I think I knew exactly what she was doing.

“Edgar...we saved each other. We watched each other's back, but this feels...like it's not enough” she whispers back, her voice low and hushed. She shifts, and I feel her against me again, the sensation sending a ripple of warmth through me.

“Maybe...” she starts, her words a quiet murmur, her body moving slowly and deliberately against mine, “...this is the wine talking, but I want you to... to touch me... like you did earlier.” Her gaze is steady but her words are hesitant. “Shouldn't a gallant should reward his heroine.” Her voice drops to a teasing murmur. “...and shouldn't a damsel reward her—her-... her heroi-*HIC*... her brave protector?”

My mind races, a jumble of thoughts and desires, but all I can manage is a simple, honest response. “I...wait, we're drunk...” I say, my voice strained and low, “this is...I think this is wrong."

"But....If this is wrong..." She shifts again, her body moving against mine, and her eyes widen slightly, her ears perking at the feeling. As she puts more pressure into her hips, she leans in close to my ear and then speaks in a soft and gentle voice. "Then I don't ever want to be right." Immediately after she finishes her sentence, she nips at my ear, making me shudder.

My heart pounds in my chest, the desire in the air thick and heavy, mixed with the scent of wine and the warmth from the fireplace. "I don't you to do anything you'd regret..." I had to stay strong.

Trixie's...she's...

She nods, her lips brushing against my jaw, the touch like a feather, light and teasing. “I won't regret this...” she whispers, her voice low and inviting. I can feel my resolve slipping, the heat of the moment and her closeness making it hard to think clearly. Her hips move again, a deliberate, sensual grind that sends a shiver down my spine and a surge of heat through my body. It almost didn't matter if much of it was mitigated by my jeans...feeling light dampness on my pants while she does this...it's erotic.

“I-I...” I am interrupted from my excuse as a soft hoof presses against my lips.

Trixie pressed herself closer—harder, as her eyes gleaming in the dim light as she gazes at me, her eyes hooded and dark with lust as she leaned past my face and right up to my ear.

"..Please Edgar..." she says, her voice low and urgent. "𝓕𝓾𝓬𝓴 𝓶𝓮...Fucking 𝓑𝓡𝓔𝓔𝓓 me, and help the Great and Powerful Trixie give the monkeys watching a real show!"

Wow, just...—Holy shit. This is fucking hot. I have a soft spot for dirty talk(with an internet history to prove it), and I'm amazed I didn't blow right there. This was...surreal. Trixie's dirty-talking to me...she wants this.

I took my hands and ran down her sides to grab her hips, the sudden feeling of her skin on mine was like a spark. My fingers brushed against the soft fur on her hips, and I felt her shiver, her breath hot and urgent against my neck, and she pressed even harder against my clothed erection, grinding and rubbing with a desperation that made me dizzy with arousal.

"O-o-oh Celestia..." she gasped. She leaned closer and whispered into my ear. "I'm so close..."

I gripped her hips and I guided her, helping her to grind against me, the sensation building between us. She moaned, a soft, needy sound that echoed in the quiet room, and I couldn’t help but moan with her. As she sits on top of me, grinding faster and faster, she lets out a some low moans, and leans forward to kiss me. Lips pursed and lewd thoughts stirring in her head. She is about an inch away at this point. With my head in the clouds, I decided to resign to the carnal ecstasy I was currently in. I was ready to start stripping off my jeans until I—

"AAAAHHHHhhhhh."

All of a sudden, Trixie moaned loudly at the ceiling, arching her back and spasming as I feel my jeans get soaked. She spasmed in this position for a couple of seconds, and when the spasming stops, she fell on top of me, her head on the other side of mine. I looked at her, a little confused why she stopped until I heard a gentle snoring sound comes from her.

"Trixe...Trixie? You're...asleep?" I ask to no one in particular. "You're asleep."

I looked away from her and straight up into the ceiling in a daze. Now I definitely can't do anything, I'm not sure what to do about it. I'm just kinda here, staring at the ceiling with a hard-on that could pierce the Great Wall of China right now and... wait, she's a pony!

Put your dick away and get some sleep, you freak!

I take one last look at the head on my side, at the mare currently snoozing with a hint of drool coming out of her tired, happy smile.

Of all the ways I could get Blue-balled, this isn't the worst…I mean, I did make a friend today in Equestria, of all places. That alone should keep you up at night, but...

She's still so warm... and the day is exhausting enough. I should just get some sleep and hope she doesn't regret it in the morning.

Yeah...some sleep would be good.

Author's Note

Rewritten 11/1/2024

Please point out any errors you see or ideas you have. I have to edit this myself for now, and I am notoriously bad at it.

Again, thank you all so much for the support you guys are giving me. Now that I know I have a good chance at doing this, I have a bunch more story ideas. But I want to focus on finishing this one first. Don't worry, this story isn't anywhere near close to done.

Chapter Three: We're going on an ADVENTURE!!!
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Three: We're going on an ADVENTURE!!!

Author's Note

Edit 11/12/2024

From here until a little later, it might be a little messy in terms of writing/dialogue. This is because this was made in 2014 when I had no idea what my writing was going to be like. I'll slowly update these older chapters while working on newer ones.

Chapter Three: We're going on an ADVENTURE!!!

''Magic exists. Who can doubt it, when there are rainbows and wildflowers, the music in the wind and the silence of the stars. Anyone who has loved has been touched by magic. It is such a simple and extrordinary part of the lives we live."

***Edgar's POV***
**Tower of Terrible Omens**

Me, Donald duck and Napoleon Bonaparte finally reached the master's sanctum. After fighting Daleks, Stormtroopers, and my old high school Oakwater football team, our bodies were on the verge of collapsing. We could not give up, however. Our friends, our family, and our future children were all counting on us. We had to stop the master here and now, or else we would be running the rest of our lives.

I snap my fingers in a z-formation, and then I point at the door. Napoleon, understanding my hand signals, realized that the door I was referring to had a very ugly looking mahogany finish and needed to be taught a lesson. Riding a dark colored horse with a ethereal mane, he screams his signature battle cry and starts to ram the door.

"I SURRENDER!!!" The Frenchman screams as he urges the horse to trample the door. As it comes off its hinges, we rush inside.

We thought we were prepared for everything. We fought demons, devils, and forgotten evils. We thought our victory was assured...

...but even if we were at full strength, we could not be prepared for this.

Sitting on a bloodstained alabaster throne, was the king of carnage. The God of death. The very whisper of doom itself...

...Rocky Balboa

"I'm gonna knock your block off!" The Italian stallion yells as he rushes toward Donald Duck. As soon as Donald was in range, Rocky knocked him out with a Haymaker. This prompted Napoleon to rush and avenge his fallen comrade. Rocky was expecting this from the French General. As soon as Napoleon slashed at him with his saber, Rocky ducked and weaved and he...he...

Oh no...he used the Dempsey roll..

Napoleon never stood a chance.

Rocky then turns to me, walking slowly towards me as he chuckles. I was shivering in fear, and I dropped my keyblade in order to beg for my life.

"Puny non-muscular man" Rocky laughed in an evil tone, "You brought this upon yourself. Do you have any last words? Actually, nevermind. You're not worth my time!!!" He roared as he reared his fist back. "For Adriaaaaan!!!!"

Swallowing my fear, I brace myself for a warrior's death. He then launched a hook right into my jaw, launching me into the air as a girly voice screamed in the background.

OUUUUCH. Wait, I'm Dreaming...right?

So why did that hurt more then it should have?

My world faded around me.

***Trixie's carriage***

As I begin to awaken, I momentarily feel a falling sensation as my face pulsed in pain. This pain increased as my face met the hard, wooden floor. I panic slightly as the pain wakes me up more and I become more aware of everything that is going on right now. I reach to feel my chin and wince as I touch it.

Uggg, that dream felt more real then I would have preferred. Seriously, what the fuck happened?

Not a moment after I have that thought, I hear a rather upset voice scolding me from a few feet away.

"Hummph, serves you right!" The voice barks. I lift my head up and I look at the source of the voice. Standing in front of me is a very irate Trixie. The mare with a bedhead seems rather upset, but I have no Idea why. I mean I just woke up, so cut me some slack.

"What happened?" I groan towards her.

"What happened? YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED???" Trixie asks incredulously. "I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED! YOU SOILED YOURSELF ON MY BED!!!" She practically screamed.

I look toward my pants, and a dryer, but still noticeable spot of Mare cum still stains my pants.

~Eeeewwwww. It feels like I pulled my pants out of the dryer too soon.

Suddenly, all the events of last night come back to me. The drunkenness, the grinding, her breath across my cheeks. Why would she get mad at me for something she did?

"You're lucky your... urine... didn't reach my bedsheets. Do you usually go into other pony's homes and try to ruin their things?" She continued to berate me. She picked up a brush with her magic, and started to brush her hair in a very irate manner as she continued to glare at me. "Aren't you a little too old to be a bed wetter?"

She must think I wet my pants. Does she really not remember what happened last night? Now that I think about it, she was pretty hammered last night. Heck, had to be to do what she did. She probably has a hangover, and had forgotten what she did. I guess that is why she has a bitchy attitude this morning. When she woke up, all she probably saw was the hairless monkey who peed his pants right on her bed. Not to mention right under her.

I slowly get up and I look toward the mirror on her wall to take a good look at myself. Brown bed-hair? Check. Green eyes? Check. Muscular and attractive jawline? Double check. Red hoof-shaped mark on the left side of my chin, between my jaw and my cheek?

..That wasn't there when I went to sleep. Trixie must have done it when she woke up and discovered the mess she thought I made.

Well, that explains the punch and the girly scream I heard.

I was a tad bit pissed off at Trixie for doing that, and I had half a mind to tell her that she did it. I did not want to because I doubt she would believe me. Besides, would I really want to embarrass her like that? I just started being friends with her, and I don't wanna make things more awkward then they already are for the trip to Ponyville. I know what you are thinking. "Edgar, you are the best actor in the world and a sexy man. But weren't we right about telling the truth last time?" Well you were, but this is different in my opinion. Last time if I told the truth, I might have loss a potential ally.

This time, we are talking about either embarrassing my only friend on this world, or having her think I am a liar an losing more of her trust.

"Well, what do you have to say for yourself?" Trixie interrogated in a way an angry mother would scold a child. Unfortunately, it looks like I am going to have to swallow my pride as I tell myself to own up to something I didn't do.

"I'm sorry Trixie. I... I had a nightmare about the Dragon from yesterday." I quickly lied looking away and speaking in an ashamed tone.

Hearing this, Trixie's hardened expression softened as some of her anger seemed to fade.

"You had a nightmare about the Dragon?" She questioned softly. I nodded, head facing away as she slowly walked closer. She swiveled her ears to my direction and stayed quiet, presumably to listen more intently to me.

Three years of drama improv, don't fail me now!

Contrary to popular belief, you don't make a good lie just by making it sound convincing. That might fool any stupid person. But if the person or pony you are trying to fool is smarter then a 5th grader, then you won't have much luck. In order to fool them, you have you actually believe your lie, and weave some truth into it.

"I keep thinking back to what would have happened if we didn't scare him off. Like any other person, I'm scared of death, and that was the closest to dying I have ever gotten in my life. I... tried my best to lie to myself. I thought I could hide that I was, and still am, actually horrified at what could have happened back there, but I guess I can act for so long." I take a deep breath as I look over to Trixie, and look away real quick to see her facial expression. She seemed to almost pity me, much to my humiliation. On the plus side, that probably means she is believing me. "I honestly haven't wet my bed since I was a child." I continue with a sorrowful chuckle. "Fitting since that's exactly what I felt like ever since I got here. I'm sorry for doing that to your bed Trixie, and I promise it won't happen agai-" I was interrupted from my apology when Trixie hopped on her hind legs and wrapped her forelegs around me me in a embrace, surprising me as she stroked the hair behind my head.

"No, no. I should be sorry, I shouldn't have been so harsh on you. I just thought that you would have been in these situations before, given how calm and quick-thinking you were when we were stuck in your car." Trixie tries to explain in a comforting manner.

"No, I wasn't. Humans don't get into situations like that unless they are in the military, or they are just downright unlucky." I explain with a slight, forced crack in my voice. "I just wanted to go home and graduate High School."

"You're still a student?" Trixie asks in disbelief.

"I wouldn't be in four days from now, when I would graduate and take my first steps to adulthood." I sniff and rub by eyes, giving a small chuckle as I do so. "Heh, look at me. Here I am, rambling on about becoming an adult when I'm so close to breaking down like a child."

"You think that's bad?" Trixie rebuttals with a teary eyed smile. "I repay the pony who saved my life by slapping him and yelling at him for something that wasn't even his fault. Is there anything I can do to make up for it?"

"You already did last night." I reply with a smile.

Trixie's eyes widened at this, and she paused for a second.

"How?" She questions with a sudden curiosity.

"Well that's easy. You invited me into your home, you fed me, and you gave me warm bed to sleep in." I begin as I smile at the mare." You gave me your friendship."

That must have scored me some major or brownie points or something, cause when I said that she squeezed me a lot tighter, and then she hoped away from me and got started with her morning activities, a blush prevalent on her face.

"Actually, there is probably something you can do." I say with a sheepish grin.

"Ooohhh?" She questioned.

"...Do you know any cleaning spells for clothing?"

***Trixie's pov***

It was a very beautiful morning in the Everfree forest. Celestia's sun was rising above the horizon, but because a thick canopy of trees cover the top of the forest, only small rays of light poke through it. All it succeeded in doing in the causing the morning dew to slowly evaporate back to the fog vapors that blanketed the forest. As foreboding and dangerous as the forest was, an eerie peace that very few places have known resonated throughout the forest.

"You want to do WHAT to my Mustang?!?!?"

...An eerie peace indeed. It was currently after a breakfast of canned peaches and bread, and we were currently discussing the best mode of transportation in this forest. I want to use his car, since it was really fast, and stronger then my carriage if the dragon could barely put a dent in it. Plus, I have a little Trixie trick that I want to show him.

...I should probably just stick to magic. Comedy is not my forte.

"Would you like me to use small words this time, Edgar?" I say, growing slightly agitated. I didn't think he would get so defensive about this. All I wanted to do was take his car completely apart, find out what I have to do to make it work again, and fix it...and maybe change that foreboding jet black color to something more inviting. Maybe a light blue with my cutie Mark emblazoned all over it.

"I know what you said, I just don't wanna believe it." Edgar stubbornly says. "It's already ruined to all hell. I don't wanna risk it becoming completely unusable since you don't even know how this thing works."

"Do you?" I counter.

"... well I'm not an expert, per say. I do know how to fix common problems with the car, like a popped tire or a dead battery. So before you take the whole thing apart, how about you just do what I say and let me help you with that." Edgar says with confidence. As much as he can while stuttering that answer, that is. Well it's better then just standing around arguing with him.

"Okay, what's the first step, Professor?" I say in a mocking but playful tone.

"Ok, well the first thing we need to do is see what the damage is.. Now from what I see, we have some popped tires, a couple of dents, and the engine sounded like something is compressing the pistons, not to mention..." Edgar's voice slowly tunes out as I go into autopilot. I don't really care about what he's saying right now. I'm just going to do what he says and nod when he looks my direction.

I know I am probably sounding bitchy right now, but this hangover is not helping, and that's not even mentioning all of what happened this morning.

***an hour and a half ago.***

I was just beginning wake up from a wonderful dream. I gave a happy sigh as crane my neck, relishing the feeling of utter relaxation and tranquility. You know how when you first wake up and you just don't want to get out of bed from how comfy it is. I am currently having that feeling multiplied by three. I am not usually a morning person, but by Star Swirl's beard that was probably the best sleep I had in years. That is, until I started to feel my hangover.

The hangover wasn't really the bad part. I get them all the time when I'm either trying to drown my sorrows and regrets, or simply wanna have fun. No, the worst part was when I opened my eyes. At first, it was dark in my wagon, which is how I prefer it in the mornings. Then I began to hear sounds of snoring beneath me. Curious as to what that was, looked down as my eyes slowly adjusted. When the room brightens up a little, I see the face of a very familiar creature. While I was confused for second, suddenly I started to get flashbacks from last night. The Dragon, the human...the way the human made me blush, Like when I cleaned my entire carriage in ten seconds. Ohhh I don't know why, but when he gave me praise it felt ten times better to me then having twenty people say the same thing. Then there was the drinking, the explanations... The way he called my beautiful when he tried to lie to me. Yes, While he did try to lie, I can see in his face that he meant it when he said I was beautiful. I also remembered me leading him to the bed and...

Noooo...

"...and shouldn't the damsel reward her her-... her heroi-... her brave protector?"

"If this is wrong... then I don't ever want to be right."

No no no...

I immediately wake up more at that realization. When I look at him, I see I am straddling him in a very provocative position. Swallowing very worryingly, I look back at my hindquarters and slowly lift my hips. Surely enough, there was a dark spot right where my vagina had been, as well as a certain stallion thing that's probably my fault.

This is bad. This is very, very bad. What if he wakes up?

"mmgmgmhhm... Donald, where's the blacksmitmhmm..."Edgar mumbles as he shifts his body, scaring me into thinking he was going to wake up. When he settled back down however, I started to get up.

Ugh... I swear I bring this stuff upon myself. Not only do I get my newest house guest drunk and borderline ra... raaa... raaap... damn it, I can't even think that vile word. I took advantage of him in his drunken state. I went full animalistic on him like I was in heat, and I..."splooged" on his jeans. Immediately after, like any bit-a-dozen whorse, I decided to just leave him high and dry by taking a nap right on top of him. Seriously, what the buck Trixie?

Come to think of it, I don't know how I climaxed so early... and so hard. Usually, a mare could go for about seven or nine minutes before she climaxes, yet I only lasted three when I was with him, and it wasn't even real sex! It wasn't like I wasn't experienced either. I tried out for a herd or two, and maybe had a night with that shy earth pony mare back at that Rock farm, so I know my way around the sack. That being said, even though I was tipsy I should have lasted way longer than that.

My thoughts were interrupted when Edgar moaned a little, and then started to murmur in his sleep.

"nooooooh, stay away frm meh..."

He might wake up any second now. I have to think of a way to make this less awkward.

Okay Trixie, think! Well, even though he's slightly bigger then me, I doubt he can drink as much as me without getting wasted. I had more practice then him. He drank only a bottle's worth of wine, but that looked like it was enough to get him drunk. It could have been enough for him to not to remember what happened last night.

Edgar shifted little, and his covered erection brushed against my marehood. It caught me off guard, and had I not caught myself in time I would have whimpered like a college filly in heat. Because of that though, I reminded myself of the spot that was obvious on his lower clothing.

Uggg, why did he have to wear clothing? He's gonna notice the spot and ask about it. It honestly looks like in he wet himself...

No Trixie, Bad Pony! I can't make him think he did that. It would embarrass him so much! Then again, if I don't he will think I am a perverted little whorse.

Weighing the options, I decided what I was going to do. Prepping my best shocked face, I slowly climb off the bed and rear my hoof back.

Well, here goes nothing. Please don't get too angry.

***Trixie POV***
**present time**

Okay, you caught me. I figured him wetting the bed would be less awkward for us then him finding out I rubbed my vagina all over him, but who wouldn't? What happened next however, I did not expect.

"We are almost done, Trixie. I just think we need to give the battery an electrical charge." He says with a smile.

"Alright. Let me see what the Great and Powerful Trixie can do." I say with confidence, masking my true feelings right now as I begin to channel electricity into the big box in the car.

He looked so fragile back when he talked about the dragon in his nightmare. At first, I thought from the way he handled that Dragon, he was not afraid of anything, that he could stare Nightmare Moon in the face and laugh at her silly helmet. It's only after he admitted his fear that I realize he was more scared and vulnerable about then I was when the Ursa Minor came into Ponyville. I felt horrible for making him feel that way. If there is one thing my mother taught me to do, it's to never make the stallion you set your eye on feel like he is the weak one of the group. That is just verbal domestic abuse.

When he was apologizing I couldn't help but hug him. I just felt so disgusted by myself that I couldn't tell him the truth, but if he found out that I did that stuff to him last night and pinned the blame on him, he would be furious. Any normal stallion would be. I ended up finding out two things about him. The first being that he was not as old as I though he was, and the second was that he viewed me as a friend.

Foal steps, Trixie. Atleast you are getting somewhere.

***Edgar's Pov.***

All in all, I say we did very fine job with the car. If we can get the battery up and running, we should be good to head to Ponyville. I still don't see how Trixie thinks we can move her carriage too. We already spent an hour on the car and other carriage looks like it would fall apart if I were to pull it at the speed my "Roy" Mustang would give.

After Trixie gives the signal, I turn my keys and hope it would start. Sure enough, I hear the familiar rumble of V8 engine. As I mentally fist-bump myself, I turn back to Trixie who has her signature cocky grin.

"Never doubt the Great and Powerful Trixie!" She booms in a showman like fashion.

"That was impressive and all, but you never said how we were going to move your carriage."

"Remember when I said that the cleaning spell I did was not the most amazing household thing that can do?"

I nod my head as Trixie's confident smirk grew.

"Well then prepare to be amazed!" She said as she pranced toward her carriage until she was about a few yards in front of door. Turning toward me and giving one last smile, she took off her hat and pulled out a... that looks a lot like the wand from her cutie mark. She then turned her hat upside down in front of her and tapped her hat with the wand.

As she waves her wand, I start to hear...

Are you fucking kidding me right now?

Sure enough, I start to hear music in the background. Only this time, Trixie is moving her head to the music. Can she hear it now?

♪Higitus Figitus zum-ba-bazing♪

Is she really singing along to the lyrics of the song this time? That's it, she must definitely know something's going on.

♪ I want your attention everything!♪

As soon as she finished that particular phrase, her carriage doors swung open, and peeking their heads out were a bunch of different objects that were found throughout the inside of her home. From pillows to books to bottles, they all had an almost living curiosity, and they seemed to be listening to what Trixie had to say.

"We're packing to leave," Trixie addressed the magical menagerie in a commanding tone. "so come on, let's go!"

The pillows and blankets started to move first, eager to please their mistress, but Trixie halted their advance with a hoof.

"No no, not you. My booze is always first you know." She corrected them. She started to wave her wand like a conductor's baton, and the music started to play again. As soon as it started, many different bottles carrying different years started to float in a line toward her hat.

♪Hockety pockety wockety wack♪
♪abra-cabra da-bra nack♪
♪Shrink in size very small♪
♪we've got to save enough room for all♪
♪Higitus Figitus migitus mum♪
♪pres-ti-dig-i-ton-i-um!♪

As she blatantly copied a Disney song from an old movie of my childhood, the many different objects shrink as they get closer to her hat, shaking to the rhythm of the music as they float inside it. This was a very organized chaos, as certain objects butted heads with each other with an almost living personality, mainly a teddy bear version of an Ursa Major and a banana.

♪Cicero you belong to the "C's"♪
♪alphabethical order please♪
♪Ali-i-ca-fez bal-a-ca-zez♪
♪malacamez meripides♪
♪Hockety pockety wockety wack♪
♪that's the way we have to pack.♪
♪Higitus Figitus migitus mum♪
♪pres-ti-dig-i-ton-i-um!♪

As the line slowly starts to shrink, it seems as if her hat was bottomless. I remember that the song lasted for a tad bit longer then this however, and she was going to finish way before then.

"Be with you in just a minute, Edgar," Trixie says as she breaks out of her trance-like state, if only for a moment. "My packing almost done."

I look back to her carriage to check and see if I missed anything, but there is nothing else coming out. What else could she possibly need to pack? I got my answer when I noticed the carriage adopt a bluish tint and start to float.

No way... the Trixie from the show was nowhere near as powerful as this, if she's doing what I think she's doing. This was Twilight-level magic.

Trixie noticed my mouth wide open and smirked, sweat visible as this feat taxes her. She tries not to let this show, as a look of a sort of excited determination takes over.

"This is the best part, now!" Trixie says with a cocky air in her tone. She then swishes her tail and hair, and adopts a steadfast stance, and hoists her carriage into the air.

♪Hockety Pockety Wockety Wack♪
♪Odds and ends and Bric-a-Brac♪
♪Higitus Figitus migitus mum,♪
♪pres-ti-dig-i-ton-i-um♪

As the carriage begins to shrink, Trixie begins to look very drained, but still determined as ever when she almost screams the last couple of lines.

♪HIGITUS FIGITUS MIGITUS MUM,♪
♪PRES-TI-DIG-I-TON-I-UM!♪

UM!!♪

As the last phrase finishes, the carriage shrinking almost instantaneously into the size of a model car. I would have chuckled a tad bit if Trixie had not collapsed right there. Worried that she might have overdone herself, I ran to her side.

"Trixie, you alright?"

"My bucking horn is killing me!'" She said with an annoyed yet pained groan.

Must have been the hangover plus her doing all that magic.

"Just put my carriage inside your car. We can take it with us like that." Trixie requested between inhales and exhales.

Shaking my head, I move to wrap my arms around Trixie.

"I'll take care of that in a minute," I tell her as I hoist her up and start to walk to the passenger seat of the mustang. "Right now, I'm more worried about getting you inside so you can rest."

Trixie didn't seem to mind as she gave a sigh and leaned in closer as I walked closer and closer to my car. I didn't mind that she was still sweating. True, it was kinda gross, but she honestly didn't smell as bad as I thought she would with that sweat. Oddly enough, She actually smelled fruity, like the Trix breakfast cereal.

The humor in that is not lost on me.

As I put her in the seat and recline it for her, she whispers a small thank you and shifts her cape over herself like blanket and gives a very high pitched yawn. It was so adorable that on the way to get her mini-carriage to I had to kick a tree stump to feel manly again. As I pick up her carriage and hat lying on the ground, I open the trunk with my car keys. They weighed about the same as their size would suggest, which was surprising since the hat pretty much swallowed the entirety of the home's inside. I had to shift a couple things in the trunk to make them fit. I had to move my Jo staff and my Bokken over a tad to make sure they were undamaged. I usually kept them in the trunk in case we had a weapons class in my old dojo, but right now they had very little use. I placed the carriage inside the trunk, and took Trixie's hat inside the car, placing in on the back seat.

"So what did you think of spell?" I hear a tired voice ask. Looking over to Trixie, I see she hasn't quite fallen asleep yet and is looking to me with an inquisitive look. "Did you think that I did good back there?"

"Well, for starters I think that Walt Disney is going to rise from the grave to sue the hell outta someone," Trixie gave a confused and slightly hurt look at this. " But to be honest, that was amazing."

"Heh, well... Ta-daaaa" Trixie tried to say in a showman-like fashion. She gave a happy sigh and smile as I started the ignition. The car didn't sound too bad and I had about three quarters of the tank full of gas. The car was currently on a wide dirt path going two ways. One side of the path was very dark, while another was brighter then the other. At least with the brighter path, you can see what's in front of you. I look a look in the bushes in there and I thought I saw... nevermind. My eyes were probably playing tricks on me.

"So where is Ponyville?"

"Go that way, through the darker path." Trixie said.

"Wait, you want me to go deeper in the dark and spooky forest?" I ask with a certain amount of scepticism.

"No, you'll actually be getting out." Trixie said as she massaged her head. " This forest... it's pure evil. It's almost like it's alive, and it's trying to get you lost and kill you at every turn. It would trick you with hope, brightening a certain path to make you want to follow it, only to lead you into a creature lurking in the fog. We have to go through the most dangerous looking path to come out safely. Just trust me, I lived here long enough to know my way around."

Trying to Ignore how horrifying she just made the Everfree sound, I shift into drive and go down the darker path. I'm still scared shitless, so I put on some music to try and ease the atmosphere into something more cheerful. I turned on the radio, and I heard nothing but static.

Damn, no satellites mean no radio.

Determined not to let the doldrums of the car get the best of me, I turn it to CD while I look for a disc to play. Trixie seemed curious at what I was doing, as she followed every movement of my hands.

"Edgar, what are you doing?" She asked

"Looking for music to put on." I casually reply as I skimmed through Aerosmith, GNR, Best of the 90's volume 1 out of 10, and my own funk mix. I usually wouldn't skip such good bands, but Trixie seemed tired, so I wanted to play something to help both me and her relax.

"That doesn't look like much of an instrument? It's just a circle." Trixie stated in a disbelieving tone.

"You'd be amazed at what something so small can do." I say with a knowing smile on my face.

Finally, after looking through 20+ discs, I found my mother's old Disney CD, I put it inside the disc and wait for it to begin playing. She used to play it all the time on road trips when I was a kid. As the music starts, Trixie looks around in amazement. The music was coming from the speakers around the car, but to her, it probably seemed like it was coming from everywhere. I smiled at the sight. These ponies may have real magic, but we humans have the spark of imagination that drives us not only to make ways to hurt each other, but ways to create incredible beauty. It's our own little magic.

♪when you wish upon a star, it makes no difference who you are♪

As the original "When you wish upon a star" plays while I'm driving, Trixie slowly comes down from her high and turns to me.

"It's a record player, but it is SO CLEAR!!! This is amazing, it's like the Royal Canterlot symphony is playing all around us, yet they are nowhere at the same time." She marveled, her violet eyes still full of wonder. "Is this music common from where you are from?"

"There are all sorts of music where I am from, but this music is one of my favorite types. No one can dislike a Disney song, or at the very least, the older ones" I say with a smile and a sigh. "My family and I used to listen to this type of music time when we went on road trips. I probably memorized these songs by heart now." And that's not counting all the times I sang them for auditions. It was common enough for students to pick a song to sing that was popular, as these songs typically have a "musical" sort of vibe. Way easier to show vocal range for a musical with a Disney song or a Broadway song than Rob Zombie's music.

"You mentioned the "Disney" person twice now. Just who is he?" Trixie asked with genuine interest. "Is he like a wizard?"

"Eh, In a way he kinda was. Instead of normal magic though, he inspires imagination and belief into the hearts of children with the different movies, shows, stories, you name it. This song is actually a part of a story that he used to help teach children morals." I explain.

"...I'm not going lie, that bit about inspiring imagination was cheesy, but that sounds like a noble goal." Trixie admits.

"Laugh at the cheesiness all you want, it doesn't change the fact that you were singing of his songs a while ago." I say to the tired showmare. Trixie took on a very confused expression as she stared at me.

"You have an obsession with music, don't you? You seem to be the only person here that hears anything, cause I definitely wasn't singing." Trixie stated as-a-matter-of-factly.

I swear to God, I will eat the next person who says they didn't hear any music. I know I heard it. I should probably just record it with my phone next time. Now I am reminded of my phone, I should probably plug it into my car charger. I'll never know when I might need it.

As I continue driving, I listen as the song ends and switches to "Two worlds" from Tarzan. I think back to my family road trips.

Family...I hope I can see them again.

Trixie, almost like she can sense my distress, comforted me.

"This is very beautiful music, and I really loved the first song." Trixie said as she leaned forward with a blush on her face and...kissed me on the cheek. "Thank you for sharing it with me." She spoke she turned away from me, probably resting from her excessive use of magic. I'm glad she turned away, otherwise she would have seen my obvious blush.

what's this feeling I have? My stomach and chest feel very weird. I feel like I am going to puke, but I am still feeling of...joy? Yea, it's joy.

I look back to Trixie, then look back to the road.

This is too cliche to be what I think it might be, so it probably isn't. I'm sure any guy would react like I just did right now… still, I liked that feeling.

***Unknown Pov 3 minutes ago.***

I look at the creature as he moved further and further away in his metal contraption. I gave up on trying to get into it while they slept since its lock was unlike any I have seen before. It seems that the creature is the only master it would accept. I give a small chuckle and walk started to walk back and celebrate my long-awaited homecoming with a plan already birthing itself in my head. Still, I couldn't help but wonder about this new creature. While it was easy to read the magician's delicious budding love, the biped's feelings eluded what little magic I had at that point. Still, that should be irrelevant soon. I will arrive back into my home in about a day or so, and be welcome with open hooves and new goal.

This being is most interesting. Not one day in this forest and he claims the heart of a lonely pony, even if she doesn't know it yet.

What a ladykiller...

***Edgar's POV***

I've been driving at a decent speed for about eight minutes, and I swear this forest is going to be the death of me. Trixie, feeling better after a little rest, has been guiding me until we reached the outskirts of the forest.

"...And that's the tree that the Ursa Minor knocked over when those two idiots brought it into town. Seriously, who would think that was in any way a smart idea???"

"Yea, that sounds like a dick move on their part."

"Well if there was one thing it taught me, it was that I was not as powerful as I though I was. I can't be too cocky all the time." Trixie said with an accepting tone. It seems that the mane six were not the only ones who have lived and learned in Equestria. "If none of those horrible things happened, I would probably be a lot meaner then I am now. Oh, Speaking of Ponyville we should see it any second now. It's just over this hill."

"Hey, when life gives you lemons..." I started the phrase, but halted when I saw Ponyville.

"You make lemonade, I know. Hey, are you okay? What, cat got your toun-..." Trixie serioused the fuck up when she saw what I was looking at.

Like Trixie's carriage, ponyville was just like it was in the show, but with much more detail. From the top of the hill, we could see many Apple orchards to the left. We could see carousel boutique, and Sugarcube corner. The most breathtaking building was twilight's castle. When I first saw it on the cartoon, I thought it looked kinda cool, I guess. Now that I am seeing the glorified treehouse in real life, with multicolored magic runes floating around it and the crystalline structure shimmering in the distance, I almost shed a tear. It's almost like what Dorothy probably felt when she first saw the Emerald City. While it was certainly beautiful and breathtaking, that wasn't the most interesting part.

No, the interesting part was the large amount of bug-like creatures trying to swarm the town, as they are engaged in a battle with the royal guards at the bottom.

Murphy's law is fucking Bullshit.

Chapter Four: Dramatic Entries and Expositions - 1/2
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Four: Dramatic Entries and Expositions - 1/2

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Chapter Five: Dramatic Entry and Expositions - 2/2
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Five: Dramatic Entry and Expositions - 2/2

"To fight and conquer in all our battles is not supreme excellence; supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy's resistance without fighting."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War

I step outside of my Mustang, surrounded by both a cloud of dust that was kicked up by my car and a mob of Changelings. The bug-ponies glared at my every movement, setting me on edge as they looked like they were going to pounce at any minute. To my left, Applebloom was shaking with her eyes clenched, waiting for something to happen. When nothing happened, she peeked one eye open, and looked to where the queen had been launched. The dust around the building settled, leaving a large hole inside that one building that sold quills and sofas. Noticing the scary queen was nowhere in sight, she looked up to see me. I must have looked like a hero to her, but that might not matter now. After all, we are still stuck in the middle of the equivalent of a bunch of soldier ants, and I just attacked their queen.

Murphy is not a glorious bastard.

Edgar's POV four minutes ago

Oh...

my...

GAWD!!!

I fangasmed all over the inside of my car when I looked up toward the castle balcony and saw the Mane Six. I mean holy shit, it's the real life Mane Six! I almost couldn't hold in my excitement from how awesome this is. It's like looking at Superman in the flesh, or Mickey Mothafuckin' Mouse. I know I shouldn't be this psyched up since I already met The Great and Powerful Trixie, but when I first met her I was still a little dizzy from the impact. Even after, I suppose that almost getting eaten by a dragon together, sharing a couple glasses (ok, bottles) of wine together, and her orgasming all over your pants is a wonderful icebreaker. I still can't believe that she was drunk enough to do that. Back to the point, that's different from actually seeing a real life main character from a movie or television show. Honestly, how would you react to seeing your favorite comic book or movie hero?

That didn't last long when I noticed the looks on their faces. Gone were the normal proud and lively looks they usually had, and in their place, just the look of defeat. They seemed argue back and forth for a minute or so, until suddenly the Queen turned... I don't know what exactly to call that. She got mixed emotions her face and then she... oh...

Oh my god.

She just killed that guard...

And I just watched it happen.

This isn't anything like the normal plotline I have seen during the show I've come to know and love. Sure, My Little Pony had its sad and exciting moments, and it even has some questionable moments like the perverted stuff that most the bronies saw during the season four premier. Sure, Sombra enslaved his ponies. Sure, Chrysalis went all "Little mermaid" on the Canterlot wedding episode. But there was never anything as horrifying as what is happening right now. It was meant to be suspenseful, but nobody died.

That was some terrorist shit that you'd see online on like liveleak or something. That was awful.

The reality that life could be taken so easily, even in what used to be such an innocent place caught me off guard like a ton of bricks. The fact that I just sat here and watched it happen weighed down on my conscience. Trixie told me to stay put and stay safe, but will it matter if everyone finds out I just sat here in my mobile suit of armor? I'd never be able to look anyone in the eye after that.

My contemplation was cut short when the Queen pointed at some changelings and said something that I would expect to not bode well for the other captives. As she started walking a couple steps away from the spot where she murdered the soldier, sheathing her weapon, the changelings she just commanded started walking toward the crowd of prisoners. They stopped by the Cutiemark crusaders and picked up a familiar banana-yellow filly with a red bow.

No... that's gotta be...not Applebloom!

Big Macintosh probably had the same thought since he tried to get up and bullrush the changelings to get to Applebloom. There was only so much he could do when he was being hindered by the green goop and the five other changelings that piled on top of him. He was pleading with the changelings to leave her alone, but they paid no mind as they placed her right where the guard was killed. Applebloom clenched her eyes as a can of clear, brownish liquid was being poured on her. The queen changeling turned over to face Applebloom and the balcony where the Mane Six were. She then said something to the girls, which sounded like muffled yelling to me due to being in the car, and then a small flame appeared at the top of her horn. As soon as I saw it, her intentions became very clear. She was planning on burning Applebloom alive.

With my heart beating frantically, I look over to Twilight, waiting for something to happen. Any last minute idea that she might have that could help save the endangered filly, but there seems to be some turmoil going on up on the balcony as Applejack is being dogpiled by everybody but Twilight.

"ONE!"

A refined, aggressive voice boomed. I look back over to the changeling queen who is currently fixated on the trembling filly right in the front. She's counting , that much is for certain. Im just going to assume that she's counting to three, since five and ten would be too generous for a villain type. I glance up to Twilight, my heart frantically beating as the drama unfolds.

What the hell is she doing just standing there? Ponyville is in danger and she is just gawking at the scene before her... and looking around frantically... and on the verge of tears. What is wrong with her? She's acting like she's never been in a situation like this bef-...This feels oddly familiar.

I mean sure, she and her friends have been in dangerous situations before, but there was always a happy ending. What this Queen is threatening to do however was not something they might have been used to either. Maybe if I could do something about that intimidating leader right there, then it might convince all the others to go and help. I can't be sure that they won't just sit there and watch while I get murderized out there, but I can't just watch this happen.

"TWO!"

came the posh, sinister voice that interrupted my thoughts.

Fuck, I got wrapped up in my thoughts. I look over to the changelings and I look back to the balcony. Not only does Applejack look about as fragile as Fluttershy right now, but both Trixie and Twilight, with tears in their eyes, look like they are about to just let this happen. Looking back to Applebloom, I start to give myself a pep talk.

"♪TWO AND A HALF~♪!"

Fuck, no time.

"OK Edgar, this is it. Any famous last words?" A moment passes in the car. Suddenly, I turn my keys and rev up my mustang's engine, giving myself a nervous nod. Upon hearing the roar of my engine, the changelings and the queen appeared to be momentarily distracted as they looked toward my direction still unable to see me.

"...Yea, I really wish I had a better idea then this!!!" I say as I floored the gas pedal, speeding up toward my intended target.

***Edgar's P.O.V***
**present time**

Come to think of it, it was impressive how close I just cut it with saving Applebloom. That might not matter as these changelings are staring at me. I look over to Applebloom, who is still looking at me. My car pretty much blocked her from everyone's line of sight, so I decided to try and get her out of whatever is covering her. Given that she's pretty much in arm's reach if I were to kneel, I do exactly that. She seemed scared at first, leaning away from me while she mewled in uncertainty. I put my hands up in a disarming manner, and I speak in a soft, hushed tone.

"Hey shh shh shh, its going to be okay." I say in a comforting tone. It was more to comfort myself then her to be honest, but she needs it a whole lot more. "I'm going to help you get out of this. Is that alright?" I asked as I placed my hand on her bindings. They had a really sticky, rough texture, almost like bunch of smooth rocks mixed with Elmer's glue and rubber gloves.

Applebloom still looked at me a with fear on her features, but softened considerably when she saw that I was not hurting her. She looked into my eyes and gave me a nod, wonder still prevalent in her eyes.

"Thank you for trusting me. Now just hold still for a moment Applebloom, and I'll get you out of this" I say in a quiet tone.

"Are you an angel?"

"What?" I asked as I fiddled with her bindings, a subtle smell of a gasoline-like substance permeating the air around Applebloom. Her bindings were strong, but there wasn't as much used on her as I've seen on other captives. I guess it was probably due to her size. After about a second of messing with them, I pretty much said fuck it and opt to tear it off her. It felt like tearing a small but thick stack of papers apart.

"An angel. I heard from Granny that they go to ponies and save'em when they're in trouble." She explained in a hushed tone, stretching her limbs after being freed from the goop. That was one of the cheesiest things I have ever heard.

Okaaaay. Another blatant Star Wars reference. Getting a little weird now, but got bigger things to worry about...like not becoming an angel.

As flattered as I felt by the adorable filly, that's going to have to wait. We are still in the middle of the road, many eyes of both captives and changelings were focused on me. The dust was still high enough to conceal Applebloom though, but it was fading fast.

"Applebloom, you're being such a brave filly, but I'm going to need you to be brave one more time." I begin in an encouraging tone. "Ok, I'm going to make a distraction, and when I do I want you to run as fast as possible to the side of that building right over there. The dust is high enough and the dust is small enough to hide you while you run. " I pointed to a house with a ruined flower garden and a purple roof. Applebloom looked towards the house, focusing it intently. Due to my panic, I probably butchered what I was trying to say, but Applebloom seemed to get the idea when she nodded and turned back to me. "Atta girl. Now get ready."

"But what about you?" She asked me with concern.

"Hey, I'm an angel, remember?" I say with convincing confidence as I leaned into the car. I knew there was a very big chance of me dying, but if I'm lucky, maybe the Mane Six will come to the rescue. At least there was a chance of going out with a blaze of glory while maybe saving a life. I went through my glove compartment, finding a CD. Any would do, since I just want a distraction. I stumble across one that says "Good music fo' dancin", and decided that that would do. I put in the disc in the slot and motion for her to get ready. She gives me a nod, and I raise the volume and press play.

As I walked over to the trunk of my car, I thought that I must be making a pretty good distraction since as soon as the music started, Applebloom bolted to the building without a single changeling going after her. The music actually seemed to reverberate across the entire town, which was surprising since I know my speakers are not that loud. I don't even think it's even being loud, it's like everyone could hear it clearly. That's the good news. The bad news was that they were still focused on me. As the part where the singer spells out the word "saftey" echoes across the deathly silent town, I take my black bokken out my trunk and place it inside of one of my belt loops. I then take out my White oak Jo staff and walk to the front of my mustang, hoping that the changeings and I just stay in a staring contest.

I know what you're thinking. "Golly gee Edgar, I know that you're the best around, and nothings gonna ever keep you down, but this seems very dangerous. so why aren't you going to hide in your car like a normal person? Or better yet, why don't you drive off?" Well, now that I think about it, that might have been smarter. But i didn't want to get stuck in the middle of a bunch of changelings punching through my windows and divebombing my car. If that happens, I'm practically canned food.

I looked at the changelings who are now slowly advancing on me, heads bobbing to the beat of the song. Atleast they have good taste in music. Gaining a combat stance as relaxed as I possibly can with my jo staff, I sing to myself some of the lyrics of the song in attempt to calm my nerves in the face of impending doom.

"We can dance if we want to." I say in a shaky breath. I take one last look over to the balcony where the Mane Six and Trixie was, but they were nowhere to be seen. As my last hope of possibly surviving this left me, I say the last line in a fearful tone while very un-manly tears threaten to spill. "We can leave your friends behind..."

"...cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance-" A voice from the back calls out in... in a pitch perfect imitation of the lead singer's voice. That shocked me to say the least. All of a sudden, every voice, both changeling and pony called out in unison. "-Then they're no friends of mine." How did they know that song, and why are they singing? I took an experimental step to the left then to the right. To my surprise, the bug-ponies mirrored motion in unison.

All of a sudden the changeling mob start to shuffle back and forth, in a sort of rhythmic motion and smiling in a trance-like state. Looking more closely at them, I noticed that they added seemingly rehearsed footsteps to their...dance? Oh my God, they ARE dancing. They are not the only ones moving and singing to the beat, and in a stark contrast to their previous states the Ponyville citizens were all smiling with closed eyes and bobbing their heads from left to right in rhythm in a synchronized rhythm. If they weren't tied up or imprisoned, I think they would all be dancing without a care in the world...Like a musical!

I'll be honest, I did not see that coming.

As they continued there seemingly mindless display, a stupendous idea works its way into my head. It's so amazing...it's so amazing that... I can't come up with a phrase that will show how amazing it is. I guess I will have to put this idea into effect in order its amazingness to shine.

I put my staff and bokken into my passenger seat, stepping to the beat all the while. I take a seat in the car, and I drive at a snail's pace for like a couple feet, just to test something. Luckily for me, the changelings started to follow me, slowly starting to make a conga line. I then drive at a pace that each one could follow at, leading them out of town and toward the green empty field I passed by.

I felt like the Pied Piper, leading these changelings out of town. While the changelings followed along at a decent speed, I couldn't help but wonder why I'm doing this by myself.

Where the hell were the girls?

***Trixie's P.O.V***
**Six minutes ago.**

"You had ONE job, Edgar." I muttered angrily under my breath.

We were all currently standing on the balcony, staring wide-eyed at the scene before us. Not even thirty seconds ago, Queen Telsona was going to roast the earth pony's little sister, but Edgar just absolutely had to act like a hero and knock her into a building. All he had to do was stay inside the car, was that so much to ask?

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that the little filly is safe and unharmed. I'm glad somepony actually did something now since we were practically stuck in the shield. If Edgar didn't act out, we would probably be stuck here watching as she let loose tragedy by tragedy. The only problem I have with this was that now he was getting about a hundred angry stares from very angry changelings. Or, it's more like his car is.

"Uhh, Twilight darling, what is that thing?" Rarity questioned with fascination.

"I have no idea Rarity." Twilight began as she studied the newfound creature with caution. "I have never seen a species of Dragon that could have scales as large as that. It's almost like plates of armor. And are those wheels? Trixie, is that the friend you were talking about earlier?"

"Yep, and his name is Edgar. And he's not a dragon." I say with a mix of pride for my new friend and irritation at his foolhardy actions. They must have all been curious, since they never seen anything like it before. To be honest, it felt good knowing something that Celestia's prized student didn't.

"I don't care what he is, he better keep his teeth off Applebloom." Applejack said, not very trusting of the Mustang. Turning her red-eyed glare towards me with wet streaks still visible on her face, she lowered her voice in a dangerous tone. "Ya got that, Trixie?"

Gulping, I weakly nod.

"D-don't worry, he won't hurt her." I say with an embarrassing stutter.

"Well whatever he is, he's gotta be pretty awesome if he took down the queen that fast. I mean he's not as fast as me, but still pretty fast and tough." Rainbow Dash said as she hovered in place. "Heck, those changlings gotta be small fry compared to him. He'll wipe the floor with'em." She said in a confident tone, not realizing how wrong she was. He said he was just a High School student, so there's no way he could handle an army of vicious changelings... like the one he is currently right in front of.

"Twilight, we have to help him. He might have beat Telsona, but he's in a bad shape. He can't take on an army by himself!" I say, pleading with the pony that I used to hate. I can only hope we have enough time to help him before it's too late. Goddess I hope I'm not too late.

"Oh course...those wheels must mean he lost his legs at some point..." Twilight looked at the building Queen Telsona was launched through, contemplating something. Then, with a look of inspiration and hope she turned to her friends. "Spike, get ready to send a letter. Now that Telsona has been dealt with, I think we can finally send one to the princesses." She began as she started to jog towards the stairs. "Spike, write down that-"

"I know, I know. You had me write it down twenty times, remember?" The purple dragon interrupted with a huff. Twilight nodded at spike, then looked back toward her group of friends.

"Alright girls, let's head out."

As we started to gallop down the stairs toward the main gate with a portion of the guards that were still left, I begin to think about my luck here. From almost getting eaten by a dragon, to molesting somepony I like and making him feel like the guilty one about it. After all that, I finally got to the place I've been trying to get to only to have to go against an army to do what I wanted to do in the first place. Even something like that would be difficult with the hostility that the Pegasus was showing me. I almost wanted to be the old me, just to do whatever I wanted to her for a good three seconds. Oh, and don't even want to get started on Twilight...

Nope, too late. I just need to get this off my chest, so bear with me.

[b]Arrrrrgggg, that mare was really making it hard for me to ask for forgiveness. I'm trying to change and be a good pony, I really am. But does she find it necessary to one-up me EVERY! SINGLE!BUCKING time I try to do something?!?

I go in to town to make some bits with my magical talents, she puts an ursa minor to sleep to show that she was better then me. I become more powerful then her using the Alicorn amulet (which was bad, I admit), and she proved she was better then be by not even really using magic to beat me. I come back to apologize and show her that I learned my lesson became good at magic on my own, and she becomes better then me by default by turning into a BUCKING ALICORN PRINCESS!!! What the actual buck?!?

Did Edgar know about all this? Ohhhhh, I bet he did. Just wait until I get my hooves on him. If he somehow survives all this, I'll shove my leg so far up his flank, he'll be spitting horseshoes for a week. Why didn't he tell me about any of this, and what else does he know?

Shaking my head, I continue to run and try to catch up with Twilight and the others.

Maybe I'm being a little harsh. I just hate not knowing anything and feeling so helpless most of the time.

I couldn't linger on these thoughts for long, since I had a more important priority right now. As we ran toward the castle entrance, I started to hear some...music? It was muffeled by the building and shield, but it was still clearly music. Nopony but me and Twilight paid attention at first. The farmmare was galloping faster then all of us, probably to save her sister. But before she could bust through the gate, a purple aura of magic surrounded her.

"Twilight, put me down or so help me I'll kick ya so hard, you'll turn back into a unicorn." Applejack began with an aggressive tone, struggling against the magic that she was currently holding her in. Her ponytail was frazzled and her eyes were still red and puffy from crying a couple minutes ago."You already almost sentenced mah sister to death once, I won't let ya do it again!" She said, making Twilight wince as her friends trotted beside her.

"As much as I disagree with her tone, I agree with her words. Twilight, why are you still trying to stop Applejack?" A quiet butter-colored mare gently but sternly asked.

Twilight's ear twitched as she looked around the room. "Don't you guys hear that music?" She asks everypony. As they all swiveled their ears, they all nodded.

"It sounds funky. I love it!!!" The hyper one said with excitement, shuffling from left to right rhythmic motion. "Its giving me dance fever right now, and I just wanna shake my groove thang now!"

"Exactly Pinkie, dance fever is pretty catchy. In fact, I'm sure all of you want to just start dancing right now, don't you?" She questioned as she slowly lowered Applejack to the ground. I wish she would stop being so cryptic.

"Please Sparkle, just get to the point." I asked with a certain annoyance, tapping my hooves. I probably could have asked nicer, but I not going to just sit here while Edgar is outside.

Twilight looked apprehensive at first, she then took a glance at my hooves. She then pointed, as if to prove a point.

"Trixie, look at your hooves."

I didnt get why she as so interested in my hooves at first, but as soon as I looked down at them I understood why. The hooves that I were previously tapping out of annoyance had adopted the same beat that the music had, and were moving in a pattern of left, right, left, right. I tried to stop my hooves, but I just couldn't. It's almost as if they had a mind of their own.

"AHH, Makeitstop Makeitstop Makeitstop!!!" I yell out in fear, trying to stop myself from the involuntary movements of my hooves

I heard laughing from Rainbow Dash as she swooped by. "Oooh my gosh, that's priceless!!!" She snickered as she held her stomach. Well I'm glad somepony is having enjoyment at my expense. She's probably going be the hardest to get along with.

"I hate to burst your bubble darling, but you're doing it too." Rarity said as she pointed out that Rainbow Dash's ears were twitching to the beat of the music, in a left-right pattern similar to mine.

"Okay Twilight, what the buck is going on?" The tomcolt said in an aggravated tone as she tried to hold her ears still with her hooves.

"I think that's Melody magic outside." Twilight explained as she put another spell into the barrier that surrounds the castle.

"Melody magic?" Rarity said with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, Melody magic, first discovered by Dr. Soundwave in 14 B.L.B. It's a phenomenon that happens when Harmony that is colliding with a voidzone is triggered by both strong bursts of emotion and a certain phrase or action. Many ponies that are affected tend have certain side effects, ranging from hearing music in the background to singing and dancing without realizing it or having control over it. The only ones that do have control over themselves are those that are either strong in magic, or in will during most cases. Even with the shield minimizing the Melody magic, you guys look like you're having a hard time controlling yourselves." Twilight explained as she looked at the door with scrunched eyebrows, trying to think of a solution to some new problem that only she knows about.

"Care ta' say that in Equish, Twi?" The frustrated farmmare said with a huff. This is the second time she got stopped from trying to get to her sister, so I'm not surprised that she is frustrated.

"I could explain more later, but the point is that unless you wanna become hypnotized by the music, we have to stay here until it fades." Twilight told Applejack with a heavy heart. The poor mare just keeps getting roadblocks before saving her sister, while Twilight probably feels awful giving this bad news time and time again.

"Just...buck it all." Applejack said with sad tone as she slumped down to the floor, weakly beating the tile as she took her frustrations out on it. All her friends went up to her and hugged her to comfort her, leaving me just standing their awkwardly. Good news is that I finally got control of my hooves.

Don't just stand there, do something.

I stand there in my spot thinking what I could do. She had her friends that she had known for a long time, but what did I have to offer? I walked up to Applejack, and paused in front of her. When she looked up at me with tired, watery eyes to see what I was doing, I took off my hat and waved my hoof around the rim. I then reached inside, and pulled out an a blue handkerchief.

"...Ta-Da." I say with a comforting smile, waving it in front of the grief-stricken mare as an offering. At first she just looked at it, sniffling all the while. Then she reached up and took it, wiping her eyes and blowing her nose into it. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that the rainbow-maned pegasus that scrutinized me earlier looked at me with a newfound respect. All the other mares gave warm smile as they turned back to Applejack.

" *sniff*...Thanks." The farmmare said with a grateful tone as she looked away from me. It felt pretty good to do that, even after the hostility I was shown originally. Small thuds soon became more noticeable and louder it sounded like something was coming closer.

Spike, the dragon from earlier came running back back to us holding a scroll, out of breath as he tried to speak.

"Twilight.. ha... the Princesses responded. Celestia is staying in Canterlot to guard it while... Luna is coming with... ha... a battalion of whoop-ass. They'll be here in like, thirty minutes tops." Spike said with hope in his tone. All the other mares seem to relax as a look of relief came across their features. Looking back at door, I can't help but worry for Edgar.

I just hope they come in time.

**Twilight 's POV**

After a couple minutes of waiting we finally stopped hearing the Melody magic, and after a couple more minutes of waiting, we finally made our way outside of the gates of the castle. We would have left sooner, but when I asked Discord to check how many changeings were outside at the moment, he said that they left a while ago with the "Edgar" creature Trixie wanted us to help. When I asked why he didn't tell us sooner he said, and I quote, "How was I supposed to know you wanted to know where the changelings were until now? You never asked.". I swear my mane almost caught on fire out of pure rage. The reasons I wasn't outright yelling at him were due to Fluttershy being right there and the fact that he said everyone else besides a couple soldiers and that one guard, Private Spoon, had been moderately unharmed.

Private Spoon...

"Honestly, such brave and loyal martyrs like him are wasted on a selfish mare such as yourself…"

No, I can't think about that right now. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one, and as a Princess of Equestria I have to make sure Ponyville is safe first. Looking around at the carnage before me, I start to think of a plan to help those that are still captive.

"Alright Trixie, where in the Sam-hell is Applebloom?" Applejack said while looking around the area. Come to think about it, neither her sister nor the black creature is around. Applejack walked right up to Trixie, getting right up in her face. Trixie is looking around for "Edgar" frantically. She didn't seem to have an answer as she just stood there, mouth opening and closing almost like a fish. "Well, Where is she???"

"Applejack!" I said trying to get her attention. She looked over to me, frustration still prevalent her eyes. "Please settle down. We'll find your sister and get through this together." She seemed to force herself to calm down after I said that. With a plan now concocted in my head, I turn to Rainbow Dash.

"Rainbow Dash, I need you and a contingent of Pegasi guards sweep the area for any survivors and changelings that might be still around." I say to the her in a commanding tone. I never liked to talk with my "Princess tone", but right now the situation called for it. Rainbow Dash didn't seem to mind though. In fact, she was probably used to it considering her time with the Wonderbolts.

"You got it, Twilight!" She said in an excited, brash voice. Turning to the Pegasi that came with us, She channeled her inner drill sergent and commanded the Pegasi with a sort of leadership ability she was born with."Alright ladies, you heard the mare. we got ourselves a search n'rescue mission with a Bug-Hunt to boot. Stay in cloud formation and shout when you see something. Move out!!!" As she sped off with the guards, I turned toward Applejack.

"You do the same thing Applejack, take a group of earth pony guards and scour the inside of buildings for anything, whether it be your sister and Edgar, other residents, or changeling." Unlike Rainbow Dash, there was nothing to be said. She just gave a determined nod toward me, a whistle to the guards, and a cloud of dust in her wake as she took of off, presumably to find her sister. I wish that she would understand. I had no choice...right?

"Rarity and Fluttershy, I want you and two other unicorn guards start freeing the captives and help tend to any injuries. Try to free doctors,nurses, and guards first so they can help tend to Ponyville." I told them.

"Okay Discord, now you be good and listen to what Twilight says." Fluttershy told him in a stern manner. When she got an affirmative nod from the Chaos Spirit, she and Rarity went off to the alleyways where the population was being held.

"Pinkie?" I asked, trying to get her attention.

"...Yeah?" She looked at me, hair still straight from when she saw Private Spoon di-... leave this world.

"Go with them and...be Pinkie. Please?" I said, mentally preparing myself for what might happen. I knew her Pinkie-sense would be very helpful in seeing if somepony was a changeling or not, but that ability came with Pinkie Pie being... well, Pinkie Pie.

Upon hearing this, she placed a hoof in her mouth and blew very hard into it, puffing her cheeks for a second. The puff then moved to the top of her head, and then settling into her hair and tail, making them all poofy again. She then bounced off, humming a toon that she probably just made up.

"Twilight, dontcha think that Rarity and the others might need more protection? You know, from changelings and such." Spike asked, obviously trying to hint that he wanted to go with Rarity.

"Hmmmm, you may be right." I said coyly, Spike visibly brightening at this."...Flashbang, go follow them for extra support." I commanded as one of my personal guards trotted off toward them.

Spike's stared slack-jawed as his head turned to follow the unicorn stallion. After I got my amusement at looking at his face, I used my magic to nudge him, urging him to go along with Flashbang. Seeing that I was just messing with him, he jogged along with my guard. While now might have not been the best time to joke around, I just needed to lighten the mood. It's probably why Princess Celestia likes to joke around a lot.

It's the little things in life.

"Discord, I want...what are you doing?" I questioned the now sunbathing draconequus. He was in a blue and white striped bathing suit, complete with sunglasses and a tanning mirror.

"Oh don't mind me, do go on." Discord insisted as he rubbed suntan lotion all over his body in a...sensual manner?

"Discord, I need you to- ugh, STOP THAT!!!" I shouted as he started to run towards me in slow motion, flipping his hair like a model. Stupid,sexy Discord "This is serious. I might need your help. Telsona could still be inside Quills and Sofas. I don't know if I want to risk taking her on alone." I explained to him. Even without the same level of magic that Chrysalis had during the Canterlot invasion, I don't want to risk a fight I could lose.

"If you need help Twilight, I'm sure that the Great and Powerful Trixie could be of assistance." Trixie said in an extravagant fashion. To be honest I forgot she was even here, but she brings up a valid point. She might be less powerful then me, but she is still strong nonetheless, as she demonstrated from not only being able to teleport through my shield, and bust through a marble wall.

"I don't think that will be quite necessary, my third-person limited friend." Discord began as a smile crept up his face. "She ran out of there a while ago."

"Wait, does that mean she is could still be around here?" Trixie asked, suddenly getting little more antsy then usual. Discord didn't show too much concern, however.

"I doubt it, otherwise we would still be able to feel her, true?" He said nonchalantly. I almost started to grind my teeth at this revelation.

"That would have been important information a while ago. So WHY exactly haven't you told us?" I interrogated. Discord simply started to smile wider.

"You really wanna know? Discord asked innocently.

Don't you dare!!!

"...You never asked." He said with a cheeky grin.

If Fluttershy hadn't come to interrupt me I would have screamed.

"Um, Twilight? Fluttershy asked. My anger almost completely melted as soon as in saw her. Who could stay mad after seeing a face like that? "I don't know if you can or not right now, but I think you should hear this."

Nodding my head, I went to follow her. Aside from Pinkie, Fluttershy is probably the most perceptive of us all. If she had something to say or saw something, it was probably very important.

With Trixie right behind me, I followed Fluttershy to the ponies that were being freed. Discord tried to follow us, but I gave him a new job: Get started on cleaning Ponyville. He tried to object, but with Fluttershy giving him puppy dog eyes he had no choice but to agree. Donning a Prench made outfit, he went to work on the houses. The sight brought a smile to my face.

Score one for me!

As I walked through Ponyville I couldn't help but have the smile fade from my face from when I looked around. Many stalls were turned over as the smells of both fresh fruits and flowers contrasted the atmosphere. A group of ponies we walked by just looked at us, some of them still shaking from the experience they just had. Rarity and Pinkie were doing the best they could to comfort them. Rarity by handing out blankets and food to the downtrodden souls, and Pinkie by trying to cheer everypony up. Their efforts seem to be paying off as the ponies they helped all seemed more at ease then they should have been. They are the element bearers for a reason.

As we walked on by, I spotted the pony Fluttershy took me to see. The familiar city official being tended by Dr. Stable as he wrapped her head.

"Mayor Mare, is everypony alright?" I asked her.

"Well aside from a few bruises and the fright we all have had, I think we are all okay, your Majesty." Mayor Mare said, coughing a little from after she said that from the dust.

"Um, Mayor Mare, you said you had something important to say?" Reminded Fluttershy.

"Uh a-what? Oh, right." Mayor Mare said. She then took a deep breath and began.

"It first started when I was walking home from work. When I got to my front door i heard somepony call my name. When i turned around I saw myself, looking at me with a blank expression. I then felt a something hit the back of my head and then all I saw was black." She looked up toward me took a breath and continued. "When I woke up, I was in an alleyway with a lot of other ponies. I think they used my identity and my home for their plan."

It might be a good idea to check her home later for anything that might help us.

"Thank you, Mayor mare. I will put this information to good use." I started to walk away, but a voice stopped me.

"Th-that's not all, your Majesty." Mayor mare continued. "What I wanted to talk about all about came after Queen Telsona killed that...oh by goodness. She MURDERED that poor colt. He didn't have to die but she still kil-" Mayor mare started hyperventilating as she looked like she about to puke. Nipping that in the bud, I tried her back to what she was trying to tell me.

"Mayor Mare, please focus. Now's not the time for that. What were you going to-" I was interrupted by the sudden sarcastic remark by her.

"Ha, now's not the time? It's YOUR fault he died in the first place!" She said, anger prevalent in her tone as her blood rushed to her face." You just sat there in your shield while killed stabbed him! Why couldn't you have done something!?!"

"Honestly, such brave and loyal martyrs like him are wasted on a selfish mare such as yourself…"

A bunch of eyes were looking toward me as the drama unfolded and everywhere it was dead silent except for the breath hitching in my throat. Rarity motioned for Pinkie to go over to another group to cheer them up, but she stayed put as she watched the scene.

"Mayor Mare, you know that's not what-" Rarity said to try and calm her down before things escalated, but Mayor mare didn't relent on her verbal assault.

"And what's worse is that you almost let a little filly burn to death. All because you wanted to hide behind your shield." She heatedly berated, hooves shaking from under her. "Were you going to let the same happen to us?"

"Please...stop it." I pleaded to the mare, teardrops threatening to break through. I was put in an impossible position, there was no way I could have made the right choice with what Telsona wanted.

"Some princess you turned out to be." The Mayor spat out bitterly, her own voice starting to break.

That last one cut me deep, and it would have broken the dam for me if Fluttershy hadn't intervened.

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Fluttershy shouted at the official as she stared her down. Shocking the Mayor, she continued standing up for me. "There was nothing she could do there. If she let the shield down, then there would nothing to stop the queen from doing whatever she wanted. Now you apologize right now!"

Getting told off by a pony half her age was not something that happened often in Miss Mare's life. She was about to reply with vigor until she looked back toward me. I don't know how I looked to her, but her angered expression softened completely as it turned into one of guilt and regret.

"Your majes-...Twilight, I'm so sorry. Please, I'm- I was just so angry, but I didn't really mean any of that." Mayor Mare pleaded as she bowed her head down, begging for forgiveness as I wiped my eyes. I saw a few teardrops fall from behind the her hair onto the ground below, leaving a few dark spots.

Don't let them see you cry. You're a princess, remember?

There would be plenty of time for later. Right now, I have more important things to take care of. Using a calming method I learned from my sister-in-law, I took a deep breath while holding a hoof to my chest. After about a second passed, I released my breath while moving my hoof outward. I like to think of it as saying goodbye to my problems. Turning back to Mayor Mare, I gather what resolve I have and continue my duty.

"It's okay, I get that you didn't mean any of it. You were just scared, just like everybody else is right now. Even I was scared." I revealed. Ok, time for some diplomacy. "I was scared of what could have happened to all the friends I made here if I made the wrong choice. I still am right now, and I need to know any anything you can relay to me. I need to protect the ponies that I hold dear. Can I trust you to help me protect your city?" Mayor Mare nodded. " Thank you, now please tell me what else you saw."

"...after the black beast appeared, I started to hear music. It sounded like something the young colts and fillies would listen to, but it was so very catchy. Then it felt like I fell asleep again, only I could feel my body moving. When I started to wakeup from what felt like daydream, I saw a figure leave the hole in that building over there carrying a sword." Mayor Mare described as she pointed toward the hole in Quills and Sofas. "Then it moved to the road going west." Mayor moved her hoof from the building to the road going toward the field. The road itself was littered with hoofprints and two wagon-wheel lines going that direction. Rarity walked up to me and whispered in my ear.

"Great job, darling. You handled that like a paragon of patience." She said as she gave a hug.

"Yes, but there is still one more thing I need to find out." I explain. Turning to Mayor Mare, I start to ask her my question. "Could you tell me what the figure looked like?" I think it could be the changeling queen, but she probably changed her form to make it harder to find her.

The Mayor looked as if she was questioning herself, but then settled with what she was certain of.

"Uh, yes. This may sound crazy, but she actually looked just like you..."

***Edgar's POV***

Okay, so you know how when you're at your friend's house and you wanna show them the most hilarious video in the world? While looking it up you spend so much time talking about how funny it is, but when he or she finally watches it they don't laugh one bit. They just keep waiting for the funny part, but the entire video was the funny part to you, so when it's over they just stare at you like you're a dipshit?

Yea, that's probably gonna happen right about now since I probably overhyped my plan. To put it in layman's terms, "imma just run'em over with mah car. 'MURICA!!!"

Now before you get all bent out of shape, just hear me out.

I was currently driving my car to the field, Changelings following close behind. I had to rewind the song like five times though just in case the song ended, but I managed to get them out here. Looking at my rear-view mirror and confirming that they were right behind me, I sped up a bit while turning. While I couldn't run over a mob of Changelings, I could definitely do one at a time while they are in a conga line. It's like playing snake, only I have to actually hit my line.

You know, probably.

As soon as I was lined up perpendicular to the Changeling conga line I sped up even more, running over two changelings in front of me. Because Trixie had to cut me out of the car I had no seatbelt. I had to brace myself when hit them. While my elbows buckled a little it was nowhere near how the Dragon was. As I felt and heard the large thud, I watched as they skidded across the grass. The droplets of green blood splattered the windshield, making me cringe a bit. Reflexively, I turned on my wipers and soon the blood was gone.

Two

Doing an immediate 180° drift with my car (which I admit, was pretty fucking cool), I spend up to pretty much rinse and repeat. This is gonna take a little while...

Three

***Edgar's POV***
**some time later**

Forty-seven

Ok, so it didn't take as long as I thought, since I had like two more changelings to hit. Changelings littered the ground as I started to finish up. My car had many dents across the hood and a green tint across the windows. I guess my window wipers could only do so much with all that changeling blood. I took a quick look at my gas meter, and noticed it was like a third of the way full. I can't really worry about that right now, since i have to focus on running ove-Applebloom?!?

Scratch that, I guess I only have one to hit.

Flooring the breaks, I came to an abrupt stop about six feet from the filly in question. She didn't seem to react at all as she bobbed her head and hooves in a rhythm to the song.

What the fuck is she doing way the hell out here? I asked her to stay hidden behind the one building I pointed to, and she followed me anyway.

Bringing myself back to the matter at hand, I saw that her eyes were open in a blank stare and she had a trance-like grin on her muzzle. Didn't the ponies in Ponyville get sucked to this musical stuff too? I'm guessing that they too would have up and followed me if they weren't tied down.

Well, I guess couldn't have expected everything to go perfectly, but this just sucks. I know I'm the one who freed Applebloom, but what if she starts freaking out? I could have actually ran her over if some of the other changelings transformed to look like anypony here.

Turning off the engine, but leaving my car on so the music keeps playing, I leave to go and grab Applebloom. In the back of my mind I thought that she could have been a changeling. Thankfully, I soon smelled the familiar scent of gasoline when I got closer to her. Picking her up, I made my way over to the passenger side of my car. She wasn't that heavy, considering that she was the size of a suitcase. Opening it with one hand and putting Applebloom in with the other, I moved my training weapons to my driver's side and placed her into the car. She must really be into the music because the entire time I was doing this, she did not acknowledge my presence one bit. After I put her inside, I move to my side and turn the keys to the ignition.

...

I turn the keys to the ignition again, hoping the car will start this time.

...

I turn the keys again and again, frantically trying get this stupid car to start, but all I was getting were "pa-toots" and screeching noises.

This is getting really bad! The car engine was already pretty beat up when I ran into that dragon, so it couldn't have been much better after running over like forty plus changelings. The music is still going strong right now, but this is starting to worry me. Since the engine died, my mustang is currently running on the car battery, which is only running cause Trixie gave it a jumpstart this morning. It's only a matter of time before the car runs out of pow-

Almost as if on cue, the mustang died. Because the car died, the music stopped. Looking outside of my driver side window, I saw that the last changeling I had to hit. Before long, it's head bobs started to slow to a stop. It looked just like any other changeling from the show, but it also looked considerably more aware then before. It seemed confused at first as to why it was right there, and then it was examining the bodies of its comrades while making a sound that reminded me of a very loud cicada. I place my hand on the bokken that I had in my front seat, hoping that it wouldn't think to look this way just a little while longer.

"Mr. Angel?" A young southern voice asked in confusion. "What am ah doing here?"

Applebloom, breaking out of the trance-like state, now looked around in an apparent curiosity. I don't think she had ever seen anything like this before. She looked out of the passenger window, but thankfully all the Changeling corpses were on my side of the car, so she didn't see anything too gross.

"You fell under the same spell that the changelings fell under." At least I think it's a spell. I don't know exactly what happened, I just rolled with it. As soon as I mentioned the world "spell", Applebloom's ears perked up.

"Spell? Ya mean like magic?" She asked in a interested tone. She turned her head toward me, eyes full of wonder. "Ya must be like a wizard or sumthing".

My inner geek cheered in victory when she said that. She looked and sounded so sincere that I almost forgotten about the changeling outside. I was reminded of it when I noticed that there was distinct lack of Cicada sounds. Turning my head toward the changeling, I see that it had stopped looking at its fallen companions and is now has his nose toward the sky. It's almost like it's trying to sniff out something.

What is it looking for-...Emotions?

The Changeling stopped sniffing the air, and leveled his head toward the horizon. It then slowly turned its head toward our direction, neck making a sickening cracking sound that I could hear from inside the car. It's gaze soon came to look upon my car, which is covered in green blood. The look itself was very unsettling, since its look gave no indication on emotion. It's green eyes lacked any pupils, and its muzzle was closed. Emotion soon was visible on its face as its started to bar it's teeth and made the same Cicada sound it was making earlier, only in a faster tempo.

"What's that noise?" Applebloom asked as she tried to peer over my window. When she did she saw a lot of dead changelings and one living one standing right there in an aggressive crouch. She let loose a small scream in fear and she scrambled to try and get to the backseat. In her panic, she accidentally kicked the center of the wheel, honking the horn. The changeling jumped at this, then lowered his head so that his horn was level toward the car, hitting its hooves against the ground in the way that a charging bull probably might.

I know that the Cutiemark crusaders had a habit of messing up situations, but this is really fucking ridiculous. This is the second bad situation I have been put in today, and it's not even fucking lunchtime!

I placed one hand on my bokken, and another hand on the door handle. I don't think I will get lucky this time like I did with the Dragon. I might actually have to fight my way out of this. I'm decent with a staff or a bokken, but I don't know exactly how I would fight something like a this. I've only seen these guys in one episode and again today, and so far they're two for two in places captured. I'm probably in over my head on this one. I almost felt like giving up, but then I heard whimpering in the backseat of the car. I looked back and saw Applebloom, crouching on the floor between the front passenger seat and the back passenger seat trying to make herself as small as possible...and something changed.

It's not just my life stake, it's Applebloom's too. I have to fight it, cause I was the only one who could...

The bug-pony outside my door was now starting to charge, with the intent of ramming either the door or the window. I don't know which, but I don't want to take any chances. As it picked up its speed, I readied myself to fight it. As soon as it was in range I opened my door to try and attack it with my wooden sword.

*thump*

"HIYAAAAAAAaaaa...aaah?" I gave a loud battle cry as I slammed my door open, about to strike it. My battle cry died down when I looked to see the changeling on the ground next to my front left tire, and It wasn't moving. For a second, I was wondering why it was laying there, but then I looked toward my door and saw a medium sized dent roughly the shape of the changeling head. I must have hit it with my door when I slammed it open. It's a good thing I opened my door a little late if I opened my door little earlier, I might have had to fight it. Letting out a relieved breath, I gave a small chuckle in disbelief.

I'm alive... I took out an entire army and I'm alive. Holy shit, I'm alive!!!

"HELL YEA!!!" I gave a small cheer as I fist pumped the air.

Applebloom popped her head outside the window as she looked around.

"Is it over?" She asked.

"Yea, it looks like it. Phew, just... just wow." I responded, still not believing what just happened. Here I was, about to face an army, when all of sudden I go all Cuban Pete on them. I take out said army only to have my car stall right before I take it the last changeling. Out of shear dumb luck, I end up taking out changeling by opening my car door.

"Mr. Angel, can ah go home now?"

"...Yea, yes you can." I told her.

"...Hey, yer alright. Wanna come meet mah family? They might invite ya over for supper. You might even git to meet all mah friends too!" She said with her adorable accent. Applebloom glanced behind me and gave a wide smile. "Hey, there's one of my friends now. HEY TWILIGHT!!!" Applebloom yelled as she waved behind me.

What?!? Twilight's here? How did I not hear her? Shit, is my hair okay?

I turned around ready to greet her, but instead of the purple pony, there stood a changeling. It was a considerably larger, more feminine looking, and horribly familiar changeling with greenish hair starting at the base, then slowly turning a very light pink. She had crushed cricket cage strapped to a ruined saddlebag on her hip, and she was carrying an ugly katana.

Her pink irises eyed me with an almost predatory leer, but her smile seemed... vaguely innocent.

"Hello...Friend." she called out from afar in a pitch perfect Twilight Sparkle impression. "I must congratulate you on your fine work in dealing with these monsters, but you seem to have missed one." She said as she trotted toward the changeling that I hit with my car door. "Normally, Changeling chitin is very strong, but you've done so well in taking out this army that I guess it's not much of an issue for you. "

"Applebloom, go inside the backseat and hide yourself." I whisper before she gets too close. What the hell is she doing. She just killed someone like thirty minutes ago, and now she's acting all buddy buddy.

"But why? It's just Twilight." she said as she looked very confused. I looked toward Applebloom in disbelief.

Is she crazy or something? How can she not see the changeling right in front of us?!?

Looking toward Applebloom, I also notice my dulled reflection on the metal door. In the distance, slowly coming toward us is the image in the shape of Twilight. Double-checking behind me, I still only saw the changeling walking toward us. All of a sudden, the queen having Twilight's voice and Applebloom thinking she was Twilight made sense.

...she can't see that it's a changeling.

Looking back towards Applebloom, I try to convince her one more time.

"Because my Angel sense is tingling, now get in there!" I whisper with urgency. "You could get a cutiemark in hiding from changelings." I add, hoping she will listen. Thankfully, that seemed to have done the trick as she went closer inside.

As the queen came closer, I manually locked the door of my mustang, grabbed my Bokken, and shut my door. She didn't seem to give this any mind, as she spoke reassuringly.

"You don't have to worry, this changeling is in no condition to fight. You must have hit him very hard to knock him out like this." she said, lightly kicking the unconscious creature. " Nonetheless, we can't take any chances. I can take care of this one for you."

A tiny, sickly green orb started to form at the tip of her horn, and inside the orb was a dark black oval. The orb continued to grow until it was the size of my fist, and then when it seemed adequate enough for her, she released it. It floated slowly downward unconscious changeling, landing right on top of it. It paused for a second, and then it sinked into its body. At first, nothing unusual happened. All of a sudden, it's eyes shot open as it started to convulse violently, foaming at the mouth.

"That was a killing spell. I hoped I never had to use it, but these animals don't deserve to live." she said convincingly as she leaned toward the changeling with a menacing glare as its convulsions became smaller and smaller. "That was for the guard, you bastard." She whispered in an aggressive tone, watching as the convulsions stopped. She was probably trying to seal the deal and remove any doubt that she was anypony but Twilight. I actually almost would have believed that she meant it for a second due to how convincing her entire act was, but I know that Twilight would never act so vengeful. She obviously needs to do more research on her roles.

Taking her katana into a magic grasp, she turned me while false regret was subtle upon her features.

"I only wish we could have caught the changeling responsible for the tragic attack on Ponyville. Sadly, all we found was her sword." She said as she threw her sword on the ground. "Horrid thing."

She definitely had story straight. While she was acting out of character for Twilight, I probably still would have believed it if I couldn't see that she was a Changeling.

She took a step towards me, making me tense up with my practice sword. I kept my bokken raised in a cho-dan stance, handle near my center while my body was facing directly at the oblivious Changeling Queen. As calm as I was trying to be, I couldn't stop my hands from shaking. I had like two hunks of wood in total, and she had an ugly, considerably sharper sword. Taking notice of this, she widened her eyes and spoke in a calming tone.

"It's okay, I'm not going hurt you. My name is Twilight, Twilight Sparkle. I'm a princess of Equestria and I came to thank you for saving my ponies." She said in a disarming tone. "What's your name?"

I stayed silent at first, not sure how to respond to this situation. Raising an eyebrow, she spoke once more.

"Can you even understand me?" She asked. Pointing a hoof towards herself, she spoke very slowly, trying to get me to talk. "Me Twi-light. You?" She said the last line pointing toward me. I don't know why, but while I thought of letting her know I could understand her, I didn't think giving her my real name was wise. I came up with the first name that came up in my mind that I liked. Pointing to myself, I spoke to her.

"...J-Jon Snow. My name is Jon Snow." I said with a frightened stutter. To be honest, this bitch is scarier then you would think, being so detailed. I kept thinking back towards those people she killed. That one guard, the changeling,... almost killing Applebloom. I took a little comfort in the name that I chose. In the Game of Thrones series, Jon Snow is one of the few Starks that stayed alive in shitty situations, so his name gave me a little comfort. It might even bring me good luck, right?

"Ah, so it CAN speak." She said as she gave a friendly smile. "Do I frighten you or something? You don't have to worry, I don't bite..." and that friendly smile turned lustful as she adopted a sultry gaze . "... much."

She started to walk forward slowly, swaying her hips as she did.

"You know Jon Snow, I can think of a couple ways to thank you for your bravery. But first, I have to take the filly in your contraption home to her family." She said , still mimicking Twilight's voice, giving me what looked like a bug version of puppydog eyes. "Could you be a dear and open it so that I can get this done sooner?"

Those puppy dog eyes just flashed for a second.

"...I don't think that's a good idea right now." I said hesitantly, worried about what she might do. She looked very surprised at this, and then she gained a more determined look.

"I said, Can you open the door so I may get the filly?" She demanded as her eyes flashed a brighter pink light once more. I shook my head, and readjust my stance. "You don't want to deny royalty, do you?"

"How do I know you're really Twilight?" I asked, already knowing both the answer and what I probably just did.

"Come on, I'm an Alicorn, isn't this proof enough?" She said while flexing her wings. " Just look at my crown, it has my Cutiemark on it." She said as she turned her flank towards me, pointing at her crown while she did. I did not see any Cutiemark on her, nor did I see any crown different to the changeling one she had on her head. It must be something that only she could have seen.

"Alright, what's the filly's name?"

"How should I know? I'm a princess. I can't be expected to know every one of my subjects. Now hoof her over, or face the wrath of Equestria!" She demanded, stomping a hoof on the ground in frustration.

"The real Twilight Sparkle would have known the name of someone that visited her during Twilight time. You're a changeling." I stated in a serious tone.

She seemed positively flabbergasted and when I said this.

"Twilight time? Bu- I- Alico-... Oh buck this! Cower before my true form, whelp!" She said in frustration as a shroud of green flames soon developed at her hooves. It rose across her body, and as the flames subsided... nothing changed. Standing there was the same changeling I've been talking to for the past five minutes. She gave a wicked grin as she leered towards me, speaking in an excited but fancy sounding voice. "It is I, Queen Telsona. The Sting of The Swarm. Now open the door."

"Why exactly do you want her. What's so important about her anyway?" I question, not taking my eyes off her. The wicked grin she had was wiped off her face, and in its place was a sort of "are you fucking kidding me" look.

"...Did you miss the part when I turned into the deadly Changeling queen who was threatening you with your life?" She deadpaned with annoyance as she pointed at herself. "You were already shaking like a wet dog when you saw me as Twilight, yet you're no more scared then you were back then?" She questioned while shaking her head. "*sigh* Males... Look, just give me the filly and I will be on my way."

"You never said why you wanted her." I shot back, hoping to get her to monologue.

"I have a distinct feeling that you're trying to be difficult. If you must know, it's because frankly you just botched months of planning, and I'm not going back empty-hooved. I just want another bargaining chip." She looked to her left and leaned inward, pressing her face into the window of my mustang. Applebloom, whom I just noticed was watching the scene from the window the entire time froze, staring back at the Changeling queen. Seeing an ample opportunity, the Queen flashed Applebloom a malicious, fanged grin. While the filly scrambled away from the window in fear for her life, the queen turned her head back towards me.

"You know, I respect you."

...What?

"Its true. I met a stallion earlier today who was about as brave as you are being right now. It's funny... it's almost like a weird case of deja vu." She said in an ominous tone. "Fortunately for you, I have a proclivity to honor and bravado. A..."soft spot", if you would."

"Oh?" I say, trying to keep her talking. The longer she keeps talking, the longer it is before something drastic happens.

"Indeed. Not only did you take on the remnants of my entire army, but you're standing up to me. That takes some serious cahones, which is why I'm going to offer you a deal." She levitated her sword in front of her, and spoke in a low volume tone. "You are afraid to die, but I can tell from the way you are holding that stick that you don't know how to take a life. You don't have to die for some pony you probably just met today. Give her to me, and you can still live a long life. You can even tell anypony who asks that I took her by force. I'm sure they would understand. It's not like just any pony can challenge a Changeling Queen and live to tell the tale." She took one step closer with a look of pity etched on her face, almost as if to offer something sacred and invaluable. "You're not a hero. You're not a soldier. You don't even look particularly strong. So please, make the smart decision and don't defy a power like mine."

I'm hoping that you won't judge me to harshly, but I would understand if you did. I seriously considered her offer in just giving her Applebloom. I hit her with my car hard enough to send her through a building and yet she still got up. If that couldn't kill her, what chance did a teen with a wooden practice sword have?

I almost handed Applebloom over, but before I did that I looked over to Applebloom and what I saw I wouldn't forget anytime soon. The way she looked at me... she looked at me with such hope, like I could do this with my eyes closed. Like I could stare death right in his beady little eyes and laugh. I looked away from her face, and saw from her hair that it was hanging down, still drenched in the foul smelling fuel from earlier.

All of a sudden, I knew exactly what might happen if I gave her Applebloom. I might end up like that guard if I open the car for her, and Applebloom... I don't wanna think about what could happen.

"Well?" Telsona asked as she loses her patience, tapping her hoof on the ground as she watched her sword whirl in mid-air out of boredom.

"...No."

She stopped twirling her sword and she looked towards me.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you correctly. Did you say no?"

Nodding my head, I continued.

"There is no way I can trust you. You almost burnt a child alive for your own sick amusement, and now you're asking for her back? Beside, from what saw earlier, you would probably just kill me after I opened the door."

The Queen gave a small chuckle at this as she shook her head.

"Ok, guilty as charged. You got me all figured out."

"You are a heartless monster who would probably kill anyone in her way. You're literally worse than Chrysalis was. The worst she would do is just impri..." I wanted to continue what I was saying for as long as possible, but the words died right in my throat when Telsona did...something with her face. It honestly looked like she had an angry seizure as her face contorted into many emotions ranging from anger, doubt, happiness, major annoyance, and finally settling on an eerie neutral as her left eyelid twitched twice. I recognized all that from earlier from when she... oh no.

I take a couple steps back, griping my bokken in fear for my life.

"Don't EVER..." she said in a dangerously low tone, a cicada noise slowly getting louder as her wings started to beat faster and faster.

Oh Shit!

"...Presume to find me comparable with that Miserable Failure!!!" She screamed as she bursted towards me with her katana.

Author's Note

Sorry if the last chapter was a little dark compared to this one, but that was being done for a reason.

And also i'm sorry this took so long to get out, my job was being a little rough on me. Feel free to tell me what you think of this chapter

Shout out to Portal82 for some really great ideas. If you are reading this, mad props to you for helping with my writers block. Speaking of which, I wouldn't mind some more chapters of that.

Chapter Six: Awkward Altercations
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Six: Awkward Altercations

"A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

***Twilight's Pov***

"What?" I asked Mayor Mare. I don't feel Telsona's presence, so she is probably too far to be an immediate threat. But if she wanted to hide or escape, why would she transform into me to do it? She wouldn't be able to give commands that could be detrimental to us as me. Royal Guards have certain protocols to follow if there is a changeling threat. One of which is to not obey any orders that could possibly leave openings in defenses. They would even disobey one of us unless we gave a special command word, like "Banana" or "Eclipse". Sometimes I like to use "Bibliography". Not only because it's easy to remember, but also because it wouldn't be the first word anypony would guess.

"I said she looked just like you. She had wings, a horn, and even a crown with your seal to go along with it." She affirmed.

"Um, Mayor Mare, Twilight is wearing her crown right now. How could the Queen have it?" Fluttershy asked in an annoyed tone, trying to talk sense to her. It's obvious that she still harbors some small resentment from when the Mayor had her outburst. While I understood that she said all that because she was scared and angry, it didn't make what she said hurt any less.

"Changelings can create the illusion of many different articles of clothing. Remember during the wedding in canterlot when Cadence's Crown turned into the Changeling crown when Chrysalis revealed herself?" I explained. That wasn't Cadence's crown. I suspect that she just looked at the crown and fashioned the illusion of it.

"Canterlot wedding? So you dealt with the changelings like this before?" Trixie piped up with raised eyebrows, genuinely interested.

"Yea, and we would have lost if it wasn't for my brother and my old foal sitter." I told Trixie, feeling good inward when I remembered that. What would Shining do right now?

"...You're going to have to tell me that story one of these days." Trixie said. Looking around, she spoke once more. "So can we do something now?"

"What?" I questioned back at the vague question.

"We are just standing here doing nothing at the moment right now, and I'm really worried about Edgar." She said as she looked toward the ground, a face of worry imprinted on her. Sensing her distress, I had to break the news to her.

"I'm sorry, but we can't go looking for him right now. Not while that army is probably still out there. We might run into it while looking for Edgar." I told her.

"B-but you're an Alicorn! You could probably sneeze in their general direction and blow them up!" Trixie countered with disbelief. I shook my head at this.

"I'm almost sapped with trying to keep my shield up to begin with. Even if I was at full power, I'm only moderantly stronger then when I was a unicorn. Besides, there is a good chance that Telsona might still be out there and I don't think I can take both her and an army on." I clarified at the distraught unicorn. "That's partially the reason why I wanted Discord's help." If anypony knows how to take down a magic user, it would be him. Afterall, he gave both the Princesses a run for their money when he was at his full power. "I really am sorry Trixie, but I think it would be best to wait until Luna and her reinforcements came." I advised, really hoping she wouldn't get mad. I disappointed so many ponies today, and I'm probably already going to disappoint the princesses. I don't want another one to add to the list.

"...I understand. Afterall, you're just one mare."

She does?

"You do?" I said as I turned towards Trixie, pleasantly surprised at this. A couple months ago she would probably would have been very upset, to put things lightly. Now, she is acting so understanding. She has changed a lot the last time we spoke.

"Of course I do." Trixie said as looked at me. "Last time I saw you, you were a unicorn just like me. Just cause you grown a pair of wings doesnt make you any better then me." Trixie paused for a second. "... I'm sorry, that came out completely wrong. What I meant was that we shouldn't expect anything amazing from y- no, wait, I meant that your just like any other pony. I-I don't mean that in a bad way because you're still unique. It's just that-"

"It's okay Trixie, I get what you're trying to say. Even though I'm an Alicorn I can still make mistakes, right?" Trixie nodded with an embarassing blush. "...Thanks Trixie." I tell her, a hint of both gratefulness and warmth emanating from my voice. I know that I don't know the answer to everything, but that doesn't change the fact that I failed an entire town. Trixie might not have mentioned anything to prompt this, but I thought back to what Mayor Mare said about me, but then shook those thoughts out of my head after thinking about what Fluttershy said. Though we may fight and get on each others nerves sometimes, we will always manage to make up for it and hearse no moment in helping one another. My friends are my power, and as long as they are with me, we conquer any challenge. I wanted to thank Trixie for that realization too, but a voice from behind me soon interrupted the moment we had.

"Hey guys, have you seen Rarity anywhere?" Spike walked up carrying an assortment of blankets piled high. "Rarity sent me to get more blankets while she t-" Spike stopped when he looked at us. "...Am I interrupting something?"

Shaking my head out of the trance I found myself in, I looked toward Spike.

"No, you weren't inturrupting anything. We were just talking. I think Rarity is helping Nurse Redheart right now. Why don't you go back to helping her." Spike shrugged and started to walk away, only for my magic to stop him. He turned around confused until I lifted the blankets be on his grasp and enveloped him in a hug. "Thanks for always being there for us." While the hug out of nowhere caught him off guard, he returned it with vigor. Placing the blankets back into his arms, I sent baby Dragon on his way.

"I just hope Princess Luna gets here soon. I don't wanna leave him out there any longer then we absolutely have to.." She said as she turned away and looked toward the horizon with a somber expression. Raised eyebrows and both a tone and look of excitement soon etched themselves upon her face as she stared in the general direction of Canterlot."It looks like we don't have to wait very long." She said with a burst of newfound energy as she pointed off into the distance.

Looking over to where she was pointing, I can barely see what looks like many dark shapes against the sky, moving toward us. Soon other ponies started to take notice as many voices started to speak out.

"It's a bird!!!"

"It's a chariot!!!"

"It IS a chariot," I exclaim out loud to remove any doubts. It's not just a chariot, it's dozens of them, each being pulled and surrounded by heavily armored thestrals and pegasi guarding them. Inside each one are a mixed assortment of six earth ponies or unicorns, both from the Solar and Lunar guards. Near the rear of the force were cargo carriages, most likely carrying tools, food, and medical aid. At the middle of it all, the object that everypony was referring to, was a dark blue armored chariot with a very familiar Cutie Mark emblazoned in the front. "And it's carrying Princess Luna!!!"

Coming down to in their decent, the chariots started to slow down and angle themselves to make a good landing. One by one they started to touch ground on the roads heading towards town square, skidding as they slowed down. As Luna's chariot landed, I noticed the armor that she had on. Minus the helmet, it was a shinier her old Nightmare moon regalia and armor.

As she drew closer, her horn started to glow. Suddenly, a transparent blue pulse emanated from her horn, growing larger and larger as it spread in a sphere across Ponyville, with a low humming sound coming from it. As soon as it passed me I felt a breeze flow across me, and with it an amazing feeling of... a familiar happiness. It's like the same feeling one would get after having a wonderful dream. I don't think I was the only one who felt this hope, as soon the spirits of all seemed to rise as this aura passed them by. The goop that still held on to some of the residents simply dissipated away as their spirits seemed to lift, almost as if what happened not too long ago had only been a nightmare. Soon another pulse emitted from Princess Luna. And another. And another. Pulse after Pulse came from the Princess as she rode up to the center of town, each giving happiness and hope. She was starting to be followed by the newly uplifted citizens of Ponyville. She soon came to a stop, launching herself in the air with her wings. Flying in place, she used her Royal Canterlot voice to stir the hearts of anypony who was listening as trumpets sounded.

"In dreams, we can accomplish anything!"

Normally ponies are either very afraid or very annoyed by the Royal Canterlot Voice, but in this case the Ponyville citizens cheered at Princess Luna she descended down to the ground. As the guards started to direct the citizens away from Princess Luna and to the relief tents that are being constructed by the unicorns, Me, Rarity and Spike, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie, and Trixie made our way to her. Turning her head to us, she smiled and walk toward us, shouting a few last orders to the officers in the force.

"Friends, thank the stars above thou art unharmed. When my sister recieved the letter you sent, we were both stricken with grief. We sent warnings to all the cities and settlements saying to be prepared for anything." Luna said in relief as she gave me a hug. When she first came to back to Equestria, she had a hard time adapting to the social norms and such. After a couple years back, however, she became much more relaxed. The only thing she still had a problem with was her speech, as she switched between old Equish and common speak often. Sometimes she even mixed both up, which was amusing to say the least.

"Yay, Group hug!!!" Pinkie yelled as she pulled us all, including Trixie, into a group hug. Trixie still seemed uncomfortable, but that's probably because she wasn't used to getting hugged by her former enemies and a night princess.... Now that I think about it I find it completely understandable.

Feeling her neck shift against mine, I could only assume she was looking around. "Just what happened here, and where praytell, is honest Applejack and loyal Rainbow Dash?"

Almost as if on cue, Applejack bursted out of a home carrying two fillies. One of which was wearing a tiara, and another one was wearing glasses.

"Alright, just what in tarnation was that?" She asked as she placed them down on ground. The fillies soon spotted their parents and rushed towards them with tears in their eyes. "Ya know, that magic wave thing that was-" Applejack and the guards froze as they looked upon Luna, and then proceeded to bow.

"Rise, honest Applejack." Luna said with a regal air. As she rose, Applejack walked up to us. "It was simply a spell Princess Cadence and Prince Shining Armor helped invent after the Canterlot Invasion. It was meant to help give hope and remove any changeling element in the immediate vicinity. Unfortunately, the feelings it provides will fade eventually, depending on how powerful it was, so it's until my sister arrives it's only a temporary solution. It should still last about an hour or so."

"What's it called?" I asked Princess Luna. Old habits die hard, and she just told me about a new spell. I might have to learn it when this is all over.

"Its still a fairly recent spell, so no name has been completely decided yet." She explained.

"Well ain't you a sight for sore eyes. I was starting get worried you wouldn't show." Applejack said as she looked around. "Has Dash come back with any news?"

We shook our heads. Luna, seeing an opportunity to kill two birds with one stone, suggested this.

"While we look for her, let us discuss what happened here." Luna said as we all started down the street. "Start from the beginning."

Taking a deep breath, I begin to recount the events that transpired.

***Three minutes later***

"After she killed the guard, she almost murdered Applebloom. I wanted to drop my shield so bad, but there was no telling what she could have done if I did. I almost had to watch her burn to death." I said as I hiccuped, trying to hold back my tears. Looking to my left, Applejack looked at me with more sympathy them before. To my right, Trixie offered a handkerchief like she did Applejack, only this one was green.

"Go on, I've got plenty." She said.

I took the handkerchief and wiped my eyes.

"Right when I thought that she was going to die, the queen suddenly got launched into a building by Trixie's friend. With her gone, I sent the letter, and here we are." I finished. "I would have tried to teleport him with us, but Trixie said he was immune to magic."

"Wait, did you say "immune"?" Luna asked, clearly surprised at this revelation.

Looking back to Luna, she just stared at me as if in deep thought. It looked like she was about to speak, and then we noticed what looked like a solar guard with his helmet off inside alleyway staring at something. While it was strange that that he was just standing in the dark alleyway, he was probably going to get in deep trouble for taking his helmet off, since it was against the rules of the Equestrian Military. Taking it off took off the disguise enchantment that came with it, showing your true identity.

"We will all speak more of your decisions and this "Friend" later, but for now I must attend to something. Stay here and continue your search for Rainbow Dash." She said as she started to walk to the guard. I couldn't help but worry not only for Rainbow Dash, but for my future as a Princess. I messed up big time, and I can only hope that Celestia would forgive me.

***Third person pov***

As she walked into the alley her horn glowed a shadowy blue, illuminating the alleyway. While a normal pony would have thought she was just lighting up the area, it was actually just a very powerful attack spell she charged up. It just happened to be powerful enough to produce a vibrant light. She didn't want to risk being caught defenseless in an bottle-necked place like this.

Luna walked up to the guard, determined to find out why he was disobeying one of the number one rules he had to follow and to punish him if his reasons were not sufficient. As she got closer, she got a good look at the solar guard in question. He was certainly smaller then the others, standing at about a hoof shorter then the others and a less bulky then other earth ponies. While his size would suggest that he was probably thirteen or fifteen, she knew that it was not possible since you had to be at least seventeen to join the royal guard. He had a coat as white as moonlight and his mane from behind reminded reminded her of the style and color Shining Armor had, only there was a white stripe in the middle of his mane and tail. On his right side he had a very large saddlebag attached to his armor, and on his left a standard-issue gladius. She could almost hear a sniffling sound as she drew closer. She was only a body length away from him now, but he did not react to her hoofsteps. Either he didn't hear her, or he just didn't care. Due to his smaller size she could peer over him to see what he may have been crying about.

Not even a yard in front of him was a corpse of another earth pony guard. The corpse was on its side, front legs folded while it was turned in their general direction. He had a small cut on the left side of his neck and piercing wound at the base of the throat, with a small trail of blood coming from its mouth and the hole. It's unblinking brown eyes stared off in the distance almost with a sort of defiant gaze. What was really strange about the dead guard was the fact that the top part of the coat was grey with a yellow mane, while the bottom-half had a sort of mixed up color on it. It almost looked psychedelic, but the "psychedelic" part was starting to fade away, leaving only what may have been the original coat of the unfortunate guard.

"This must have been the guard Twilight mentioned." Luna thought as she speculated what might have been happening right now. The changelings must have dumped the guard here right after he died."Well, that solves one enigma. But who is this other pony?" she pondered.

She straightened her stance into a more regal one and cleared her throat. The guard, hearing the throat clear he quickly wiped his eyes. That explains why his helmet was off, since he wouldn't be able to reach them if it was on. He drew his sword with his mouth and turned to face whoever was behind him. Expecting a changeling, the guard was shocked to see the princess of the night standing there. That didn't stop him from keeping his sword raised, since she still could have been a changeling.

"Bedtime." Luna said, trying to assuage any fears the guard might have had. The guard visibly relaxed upon hearing her code word, but was still a mess to say the least. At least he sheathed his sword.

"Your majesty, you surprised me." he spoke while bowing his head. He didn't have a gruff accent like the other guards, as his sounded much more inviting. She wanted to say that his youthful accent reminded her of one of the Canterlot nobles, only there was no snobish undertone. If anything, it reminded her of the knights of the old kingdom, which fueled her nostalgia and helped her relax. She took a better look at the stallion in question. He seemed the same age, if not younger then the dead guard he must have been crying about. She could also just barely see tear streaks on his face, even though it was tilted down.

"Rise young soldier. What is your name and rank?" She said to the stallion. He stood up, but kept his head facing down as he spoke.

"Khan. My name is Private Khan, your ma-majesty." Private Khan spoke with a stutter. It wasn't out of fear, and Luna had a decent guess as to what it was. Even if she hadn't heard the sniffling or seen the tear streaks, she would have heard the shear amount of pain in his voice he was trying to hide.

"Private Khan, please look at me." She asked with a gentle tone. While it was still a command, she still would have understood if he had hesitation, or even disobeyed it the first time. While he did have some hesitation at first, he complied by slowly lifting his head to meet her eyes. His face bore the same determined glare that all guards were trained to give at all times. He was probably trying to hid the fact that he was crying, but the ocean blue eyes he had were puffy and red from crying, betraying his current state of mind. "You can drop the glare if you want. We are alone right now, I can allow it." She insisted, trying to make it easier for him. He kept his glare though, and proceeded to explain what he was doing.

"Your majesty, I was patrolling the area looking for changelings, and I found a body of Hea- this guard." He said, trying hard to mask his emotion, which seemed strange to her. While it was always sad to see somepony die, the royal guard always had been very good at masking what they were feeling. It took five years for Luna to be able to tell the signs of what one of them was feeling. He shouldn't have had this much trouble in doing it unless...

"Did you know him, Private?" She asked, having an idea of what the answer was. After a moment of pause, he clentched his eyes and gave a nod.

"He was sent out of our platoon three days ago." He said. Luna knew he was telling the truth, but it wasn't the whole truth. Regardless, she didn't press him on the issue, having an idea of what he was feeling. After all, how many friends of old has Luna seen fade away into memory? She walked up closer to the stallion, and pulled him in with a foreleg, wrapping him in a hug. They met with their armor making a clinking sound as it caught him off guard.

"Princess?" He started to questioned, but was quickly shushed by the regal Alicorn as she slightly tightened her hug, careful not to crush him. Her sister taught her that a little compassion can go a long way in helping a loyal subject, and at the moment the best she could do is lend a shoulder to cry on. While it may have seemed presumptuous that she thought he would cry, the fact that she was hearing passive melody magic in the air shows just how much he was holding in.

Melody magic was a very interesting thing. When active, it could make anypony sing about a subject they knew nothing about and be none the wiser. But when passive, it can warn anypony of the mood a certain situation has, and amplify it for anypony that is affected by it. Any creature that has a very strong will or it powerful in magic like Luna can hear it and resist its effects, but it seems that Khan wasn't strong enough as It forced him to show his pain. He couldn't hold back his tears as they coated the neck of the royal sister. She felt small tremors emanating from the guard as he unbottled his sadness. Whoever this Private Spoon was, he must have meant a great deal to him.

"I'm sorry p-princess. I'm a guard, I shouldn't be so-"

"There is no shame in mourning the loss of a friend." She said as she let go of him. "But as sad as it is, you cannot help protect Ponyville in your current state. For now, I am relieving you of duty." She said as she shot a small purple flare spell into the sky, watching it explode in a gentle flash of light. "Try for get some rest, the flare spell I sent will bring some guards here to retrieve his body." She said as she prepped herself to fly back to the Element Bearers. Before she could leave however, a voice from behind stopped her.

"You'll get her, won't you?"

Luna turned back to Private Khan, and a look of both determination and angry desperation etched itself on his face. It as something Luna was all too familiar with when she was under the influence of The Nightmare.

"I'm sorry?" She asked.

"The bitch who killed Spoon. She'll pay, right?" He asked a tone wrought with a silent but vengeful fury. He wanted blood, that much was for certain. Luna made a mental note to visit him and any other affected by this event in their dreams and help them cope, at least until her sister gets here.

"...I will do my best."

And with that she took off, leaving Private Khan at the alley. He briefly considered leaving, but after looking upon the corpse of Private Spoon he decided against it. Drawing his gladius, he took a guard stance and waited diligently for the other guards to arrive. He hated the shear irony of the situation, how it paralleled with the past, but he couldn't focus on it right now.

"Don't worry buddy..." He said to his fallen brother-in-arms as he drew a line across where he was. Right now, his focus was trying to protect his friend like his friend had done for him many times before.

"...I got your back."

*Twilight's pov moments after Luna left*

"Ugggg, what's taking her so long? She should have been back by now. " I huffed with frustration.

"Knowing Dash, I reckon she probably got done with her flight a while ago."

"Sup guys, whatcha doin?" A raspy feminine voice asked.

"Nothing yet, we are just waiting for Rainbow Dash. I just wish she would hurry up." I told the voice, not really paying attention what's going on. Pinkie started to giggle, but that's probably just her being Pinkie. Most of the time she'll find any reason to laugh as long as it's within reason. "Fastest mare in Equestria and she's STILL late. The longer she's out there, the more worried she's making us all."

"Ah don't think I'm worried to much on where she's at right now." Applejack said with...I don't know whether that's mirth or sarcasm.

"...So when do ya think she'll notice me?" The raspy voice butted in again, annoying me. We have too find Dash, and I really don't have time for this. I turned to the owner of the voice that was talking.

"Can you please just be quiet. You're not helping." I told the Rainbow maned Pegasus. Turning away from her, I resume my thoughts. "Now, where cou-"

Wait, Rainbow-maned?

I turned my head to the pony I was just talking to, and saw Rainbow Dash just standing there with a smug grin. Everypony else was trying to suppress chuckle. Well, there's still the issue of not knowing whether or not she's a changeling. At the very least, we should check with one of my code wo-

"S'bout time you looked over here, egghead. I was getting bored of just standing here."

Yep, that's her.

"...How long were you standing there?" I asked her.

"About ten seconds flat." She replied, getting a deadpan from me.

Really?

"What took you so long to get here. You had us worried." I asked her.

"Alright, get this. So here I was, flying around Ponyville when all of a sudden I saw some shadows in Mayor Mare's house. It looked like a changeling so I busted in through the window, ready to kick some flank. But there wasn't any flank to kick. All I saw were maps and plans pinned to the wall. The guards that were with me said they would take it to the castle for you to look over. I knew I saw shadows, so I looked around to find what caused them." She finished.

"...Well?" We all said at the same time, eager to hear what happened next. Rainbow Dash reached inside her mane with both of her wings, and with a care that was unlike her, she slowly and gingerly lifted small object covered by her feathers. She held her wings in front of her and uncovered them, revealing... a little breezy. It was small even by breezy standards, based from the other breezies we saw, but it was still a breezy nonetheless. It was a very light purple breezy, with long blue hair. Well, long compared to its size, that is. Strapped to its left side was a half-eaten raisin and some thread, and to its right was a sewing pin. It was currently laying down with and covering its face with its hooves, shivering in either the tiny breeze or in fear.

"I found this little guy trying to hide from me. The shadows I saw was probably from the candle that was right next to where I found him hiding. Poor guy, he probably thought I was a changeling and got scared." As soon as Rainbow said that, the breezy stopped shivering. It took its hooves off its face, stood up, and glared right at her. It then flew up to Rainbow Dash's face and yelled at her with the fury of an angry little moth. As it was moving around, Its sewing pin was jingling around on its side.

"Scared?!? Oi, I wasn't scared!!!" it yelled in a high-pitched, feminine tone. Its accent was of the same type that all the other ones had. Maybe thats just the accent that they were known for, like earth ponies stereotypically having southern accents, or Griffons having a Prench one. "I getting ready to ambush you if you were a changeling, ya ninny!!!"

Rainbow Dash was not amused at the breezy's actions, and she wasn't the type to just let that slide.

"Riiiiiight, if you could call hiding in a flowerpot "getting ready for an ambush". I probably just saved your life. Without me you would've ran into a mouse trap, or got stuck in some old maple syrup or something." She shot back with her years of experience in the art of smack talking.

"First off I'm not a colt if ya can't tell by the thick, wavy locks of hair. And second..." The female Breezy turned around and bucked Rainbow Dash as hard as she could in the nose. It was a Breezy, so there was no way it could have hurt. That being said it still left a dirty hoof imprint on her nose. "I was doin' just fine on my own, thank ye very much. I was in the middle of making my daring escape until you just had to ruin it all by forcibly taking me against my will, ya glorified box of crayons."

So it's a mare. A feisty one at that. She's probably even more feisty then that one Breezy leader when he first left during the Breezy migration.

Rubbing the tiny hoofprints off her nose, Dash looked like she was about to blow.

"Glorified box of-, why I oughta-mffmvfmb mbdbghr!!!" Her livid threats were wasted when Fluttershy shoved a hoof in her mouth.

"We got off on the wrong hoof. I'm sure whatever she was about to say, she didn't mean it." Fluttershy said, trying to calm down the angry little sprite. "Let's start over. I'm Fluttershy, and these are my friends."

"Wait, you're Fluttershy?" The Breezy asked. When Fluttershy nodded, the Breezy flew up to the front of her view with a more lively and carefree way.

"Why yes I am. Why do you ask?"

"You're the one who helped my father get back home." She looked at her like she was supposed to know who she was talking about. "Ya know, tall Breezy, pink hair, and when he smiles it looks like this." She then proceeded to demonstrate his "smile", which consisted of her just staring at us with narrowed eyes, furrowed eyebrows, and a straight face.

Fluttershy stared at the breezy for a moment, then with one raised eyebrow she took a guess.

"..Seabreeze?"

"Ai, that's him alright. I'm Delphinium Bell, by the way. But you can call me Delphi for short. " She responded.

So she is Seabreeze's daughter....this just raises more questions!!! Like what is she doing way out here? Why isn't she at home? How come she looks so much older right now then she should have been. Last we saw Seabreeze, She looked like a newborn filly. The main question I wanted to ask is why she said she was in the middle of an escape.

I didn't get a chance to ask though, since soon I saw that Princess Luna was flying towards us. The glare from the sun made her look like a shadowy sillouete. I wasn't the only one who saw her, as "Delphi" started to get riled up.

"Come back for a rematch, have ya Telsona!?!" The mistaken sprite yelled at her. "Well bring it on then. I've been waiting for this for a bloody long time!" As soon as she finished, she rushed over to where Luna would be landing . She drew her pin and flew in place there, waiting. "I'M A GRIM BLOODY FABLE WITH AN UNHAPPY BLOODY ENDING FOR YA!!!" she yelled at "Telsona".

The glare of the sun soon faded as she decended, and with it the confusion that Luna might have been anypony else. She looked downward and saw the Breezy floating there, just staring at her while her mouth was just trembling.

"Well hello there, little one. Where did you come from?" Luna asked with a friendly smile. "I am Princess Luna. What is your name?"

Delphi said nothing as as she just stared at Princess Luna. Then she screamed surprisingly loudly for somepony her size and zipped over to Trixie, scrambling under her hat and surprising Trixie for a second. Luna simply sighed while she shook her head, and then walked towards us as Rainbow snickered in the background.

To be fair she has a right to laugh, due to how cocky Delphi was acting just a second ago. It's still like the pot calling the kettle black.

"...Well that escalated quickly." Rarity commented. "What do you suppose that was about?"

"Yoohoo, Delphi, what are you so scared of?" Pinkie asked as she poked and prodded Trixie's hat. Trixie pulled away in annoyance, and tried to fend Pinkie off with weak shield. "Come on, it's just Princess Luna. It's not even Nightmare Night yet, so she can't be that scary."

"I wouldn't bother Pinkie, for I am the scariest creature to her right now." Luna said in a tired tone of having to go through this even after a couple years of repairing her reputation. "Breezies and Changelings alike fear Nightmare Moon greatly."

"Whoa, what's with the getup Luna? It's nowhere near Nightmare Night." Rainbow Dash questioned when she finally noticed the armor Princess Luna had on.

"It was meant to strike fear in the hearts of the Changelings but I didn't expect there to be non here, let alone a Breezy so far from home." Luna said as she looked around.

"No offense princess, but if you wanted to scare the Changelings, couldn't you come as yourself? I mean, you can be awfully frightening when you are upset." Rarity offered with caution, not wanting to offend Luna.

"None has been taken, but I would have had a much greater effect on their morale if I stayed like this for now. Their fear for Nightmare Moon is equal only to their fear of the dark." She explained. Before I can ask why that is, Trixie spoke as she trotted in place.

"I don't know if this is important or anything. You may want to get to it whenever you have the chance, but EDGAR IS STILL OUT THERE!" She yelled as her ear twitched around. "We have an army and two Alicorns, shouldn't that be enough?"

"Indeed, but it is difficult to track them down right now." Luna said as she looked around some more as if in some thought. She then turned towards me s if she had an epiphany. "Twilight, you said he was immune to magic, correct?" I nodded, wondering where she was going with this. "That might explain what I've been feeling off in the distance towards the fields. I keep feeling something powerful, and at the same time there is nothing to feel. It's almost like something is flickering between existing and not existing. I thought it was just my imagination until now."

"That's Edgar! it has to be him." Trixie exclaimed with excitement as her ear kept flicking. She looked upward towards her hat with an annoyed expression a couple seconds later, then poked at it. "Hey, stop that. As I was saying, that can't be anypony else other then him. Though, I don't know why you can feel him all of a sudden though since he is immune." Trixie added to herself. It might be because Princess Luna developed a keen sense during her long life, but I don't think that's it because it didn't make sense to me. You can't just detect something that isn't affected by magic.

"And if he's there then that means Applebloom is too, right?" Applejack said, hoping she was going to like the answer. Trixie gave an unsure nod, which seemed good enough for Applejack.

Princess Luna took all this into consideration as she took a couple steps back. Her horn glowed a vibrant blue, and she launched a red flare spell into the sky. Within seconds a large portion of Royal Guard rushed to Luna's side, eager for some action. They were a mix of all pony races, mostly being filled with Thestrals. As the Pegasus were getting latched to chariots so they could pull the unicorns and earth ponies, the Thestrals formed a perimeter around Luna. Turning toward me, she spoke.

"You and thy friends shall stay hear and watch over Ponyville until our return. Don't worry about us," she told me with a without warning a shroud dark mist gathered at the base of her hooves, enveloping her as it started to rise. When she got completely covered, it began to dissipate as quickly as it covered her, revealing the once feared Nightmare Moon minus her helmet. In a voice I have not heard since nightmare night, she spoke once more. "We won't be gone for long." and with that, she took off at astounding speed towards the fields leaving a black smoke trail in her wake. Roughly half of the guards that came followed her at an almost equal speed, but were still a little slower then her. It would probably take a minute or two to catch up to her if she decided to stop.

I looked back to the guards she left, their face as stoic as ever.

"...Carry on with what you were originally doing." I told them, not being about to think of anything too more important then what they were doing earlier.

"That. was. AWESOME!!!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she flew in the air. "Did you see her? She was all "I'M GONNA MURDERIZE THEIR FLANKS" and she took off really fast and..."Rainbow realized that she fanmared pretty hard, and then readjusted herself "*cough* So yea, that happened."

"D-does she do that often?" Trixie asked with wide eyes and surprised tone." The Nightmare Moon thing?" Oh, that's right. she only just met Luna today, so it would make sense that she hasn't seen her as Nightmare Moon before.

"Not since a couple Nightmare Nights ago. It's mostly just for fun. There's really nothing to worry about." Fluttershy said to help ease her fear.

Trixie took some deep breaths, and finally calmed down a decent amount.

"Ok, I think I'm good now." She said, but soon adopted an annoyed expression when her ear twitched a little." Actually, there is one thing that is still bothering me." Pointing to her hat, she spoke to Fluttershy."You're good with these things, right? Get it out of my hair. Literally."

Walking up to her, Fluttershy grabed Trixie and moved her head downward so that her hat was level her face. As she started whispering softly to Delphi, Trixie froze out of instinct.

"Ooh ooh, what's she sayin'?" Pinkie asked.

"I have no idea," Trixie said, not moving a single muscle as Fluttershy worked her magic. "They're both talking too softly for me to hear."

Fluttershy took a step back from Trixie and gave the news.

"She doesn't wanna leave just yet."

...

"What?" Trixie said incredulously.

"She said that she just got warm and cozy and wants to stay there until there is a room made just for her." Fluttershy explained as she shook her head. "Besides, she also said that she liked how it smelled like a mix of raspberries and booze inside of it." Fluttershy added. Trixie looked back towards us and saw that we were all just staring at her.

"What?" She asked in an acccusing manner after being put on the spot."You have your vices, and Trixie has hers."

Deciding to change the subject from her being an alcoholic, my thoughts drifted to Edgar. If Trixie said he was in bad shape, then we may have problem. Sure, Spike has gone in for a routine checkup, but none of our doctors have ever done a full-blown surgery on a Dragon, or whatever Trixie said he was before. She seemed attached to him, and if he came in more injured then he currently was, I don't know if we could save him. Almost as if she read my thoughts, Trixie brought up Edgar before me.

"Do you think she'll make it in time?" She asked, obviously referring to her friend.

"I don't know, but the changeling army should be taken care of relatively easily now that Luna and her reinforcements are here" I told her reassuringly. She didn't seem to buy it though.

"That doesn't make me any less worried about him, because I just had a disturbing thought." Trixie started as she looked over to where Luna flew. "Luna said that she felt nothing to feel, so that had to be Edgar. She also said that she felt something powerful in the same direction." As soon as she finished that statement, she looked over to me with worried eyes. "Whose power could that be?"

...Telsona!

Suddenly it made sense why Luna could sense him. It's because she was also sensing Telsona.

Looking back to direction Trixie was looking, I let out heavy breath trying to keep myself compose. If Telsona is out there with Edgar and Applebloom, then there is a good chance that something bad is going to happen.

No, I can't be responsible for any more deaths. I began whisper a small prayer to myself.

"Please be safe."

***Edgar's P.O.V,
Approximately Seven minutes ago.***

I take a couple steps back, griping my bokken in fear for my life.

"Don't EVER..." she said in a dangerously low tone, a cicada noise slowly getting louder as her wings started to beat faster and faster.

Oh Shit!

"...Presume to find me comparable with that Miserable Failure!!!" She screamed as she bursted towards me with her katana. Fueled by her rage, she did many sloppy slashes at me, which I prominently kept trying to dodge. She eventually did a downwards cut with her sword as soon as she came into range. Letting my martial instincts kick in, I moved my bokken in a parry position above my head, letting her blade glide across the back of mine as I stepped towards her side. When I was in was clear, I took my bokken and made a diagonal cut across the back of Telsona's thigh, close to her flank.

Contrary to what most movies portray, a Japanese sword fight would normally only last about five seconds at the most. It also wasn't about hitting each others swords all the time and using strength to overpower an opponent, at least when a sword like a katana came into play. It was about superior angles and precision. If everything went right, that should have been enough to take her down. But like everything that has happened since I got here, things went wrong. Firstly, I just now realized that I was holding a wooden practice sword, so when I struck to cut her, I just ended up smacking the back of her thigh. Secondly, when I deflected she ended up shaving some wood off my bokken leaving it a little smaller then it was before. Third ,she had really thick chitin, so it felt like I tried to chop down a small tree with a broomstick. Fourth and finally, I started to get distracted by the...Yep, you fucking guessed it.

Trying to ignore the painful vibrations I felt run up my arms and the strangely familiar and fitting music, I took a small hope backwards to get out of her range. Quickly turning around towards me as she winced, she took a glance at her flank and notice a black mark on her rear. It wasn't due to a bruise that started to form, but it actually came from the paint that scraped off of my bokken. Lifting her head up she faced me one more time, with a raised eyebrow to complement her glare.

"You just struck my flank." She said in a neutral tone, laced with a small amount of disbelief.

"You tried to kill me!" I shot back, not believing just how trivial this lady was being. She kills people without so much as blinking an eye, and then she all of a sudden gets so defensive about this??? Fucking women.

"You struck my bucking flank!" She borderline yells back at me. We both got into a silent staring contest for a second, until a wanton smile worked its way onto her features as she gave a small lip bite . "... I kinda liked it."

...Da fuck?

Almost as if she said something she didn't mean, she wiped the smile off her face and shook her head.

"...Sadly, I don't have the patience to act on that, since you did bring up she-who-shall-not-be-named. We'll both just have to settle for blood." She said as she got ready to stab forward. Right as she was about to stab, I opened the car door to use as a shield. Her sword pierced about an inch through my door frame, but didn't pass through the carbon steel frame of my car. At first, I though that was badass since it worked, but she saw her opportunity and tried to rush through the open door to get Applebloom. Letting adrenaline and reflex course through me, I do the first thing that came to mind.

"There you are, you little brat-AHGGG, BUCK!!!" she probably would have said something very villainous sounding if I didn't kick my car door shut with her face in between it. The door rebounded off her face, and she withdrew herself from it before i could slam it again. I gave the door another kick to keep it shut. She rubbed her lip before focusing her eyes on her hoof. There was a small green droplet on it. Putting her hoof back to the ground, looked right at me with an unreadable expression.

Well this is just fucking stupendous. Just what did I get myself into? Not only do I have a livid psychopath here, but my weapon just got a whole heck of a lot less reliable.

She lifted her sword in the air from her spot, which I lowered my sword to a lower stance. Raising her eyebrows, she then slowly lowered her sword to match mine, which I put my front foot back and moved my sword into a "hidden" stance.

"Ah, so you do know a thing or two about fighting. And here I though with the way you were shaking that this wouldn't be any fun." She mused as she put herself into her original stance. Fuck, she was trying to see what I knew, and like a dumbass I shown her exactly what she needed to know. Looking as if as was in thought for moment, she suddenly gained a devious smile. "Hey, I just thought of a wonderful game we could play."

Well that doesn't sound good.

"I never liked games that much." I lied, hoping that she would buy it.

"Oh but I insist, Jon Snow. I really think you will like it." She said, addressing me by the false name I gave her. Well, she believed one thing I told her, so at least I had that." Besides, I'm positively mad about games, you know." She said as she took a step forward, causing me to take a step back. I wished she used a different choice in words.

"It's very simple, really. The longer you survive, the more swiftly and painlessly your death shall be. Ready?" She said as she took another step forward. "Get set." I took another step back. "...GO!" She yelled as she took two quick steps forward, acting like she was about to strike. On instinct I tried taking two steps back to keep her out of range, but failed as I tripped over something and fell on my back. Looking at what I tripped over, I saw it was the changeling Telsona killed a couple minutes ago. I tried to get up fast, but a smooth black body pinned the arm that was holding the bokken. Looking at it, I saw it was another dead changeling. The green glow that covered the changeling soon faded, and when I looked up, I saw Telsona standing over me, and she had a smug grin on her face. Her horn was still glowing, and I soon felt even more weight on my legs. I could only assume it was another corpse. Feeling something really wet on the arm that was pinned, I had an idea of what it was, and almost threw up at the thought.

"Well that wasn't very long at all. You should be ashamed of yourself." She patronized as she held her katana with her magic close to the side of my neck. "I mean really, that was one of the oldest tricks in the book."

"Y-you cheated!" I yelled, not being able to think of anything else to say.

"And did I win?" She shot back in an amused tone. After she gave a small chuckle, her face shifted back to the serious gaze she had before. "I think I'm going to kill you now, but don't worry, you won't die."

What?

"Hehe, you seem confused. Go on, ask me why. Ask me why you won't die even though I said I'm going to kill you." She mocked with an evil gleam, sensing my bewilderment.

"...Why?" I obliged, not wanting to piss her off any more then I already have.

"Ah bupbup. Be specific, Jon." She corrected, obviously enjoying the display of her dominance.

"Why am I not going to die?" I repeat, beginning to dread the answer. She took her sword away from my neck and held it in front of her.

"This isn't what somepony would call a normal sword. I would even go as far as to call it cursed." She began, not talking her eyes off me all the while.

Greeeeeat. Now she starts monolouging.

"When I kill you, your spirit will be stuck in here like all the other snot-nosed creatures who got in my way." She said as she leaned closer to me. "Think about it, you get to be with me for as long as I want. You can watch as I decimate villages with all the other souls that are inside this sword." She asked as she raised her sword above her head, ready to plunge it into my neck. She paused for a moment before smiling a toothy grin. "You really did remind me of somepony. Many ponies actually, but the good news is you're about to meet them all."

"W-wait, if you kill me," I started to say, trying to think of something to tell her to keep her interested enough to not kill me." Then you'll never find the ring."

That seemed to be enough to stop her descent, if only for a moment.

"The ring?" She inquired as she tilted her head in interest. "Just what are you blabbering about?"

"...The one ring to rule them all? Forged in the fires of Mordor?" I kept going, trying to buy time until I think of something.

"...That literally sounds like something a twelve year old colt would make up while playing forts and phantoms." She said as she deadpaned. Wow, what a cunt! No-one talks shit about Tolkien. "Nice try though." she mocked she started her blade's plunge.

I struggled wildly, trying to free my arm from the corpse it was pinned under, but it was no use. I would never get out of it in time. As she began to lower the blade, my life flashed before my eyes. My first day at school, my first kiss, going to the beach with my family... why do I literally see flashing?

Apparently I want the only one who noticed this as Telsona stopped her inevitable plunge, noticing a light reflecting off her blade. She seemed almost mesmerized as she stared into the blade, like a moth to the flame. Shaking herself free from the trance she put herself in, she frowned.

"Okay, what the buck is that?" She questioned as she started to turn toward the source. The second she turned her head to the source of the flashing, she found herself slapped hard by the light and she was launched a couple feet forward by some sort of blue aura, falling face first into the ground. The blade that was hovering above me fell down, and I barely had time to dodge as it pierced the ground right beside my head. Out of shear instinct I turned my head toward the blade, only to nick the tip of my nose with a papercut sized slice.

"Oh. My. God!" I yelled to whichever cruel deity was organizing my luck right now. "WHYYYYYYY?!?"

Ignoring the irritating sensation of the itching pain on my nose and how stupid I was, I decided to free my arm before I lost all circulation and got that dull "pins and needles" sensation. Relaxing my arm, I drew it inward whilst being careful not to hurt myself anymore. When my arm was free I hugged it and the bokken close to my chest, trying to get some blood flow back into it. Soon the music started to die down to a complete stop as another pulse of light passed over me, and the body of the changeling that my arm was trapped under also launched itself towards the direction Telsona flew, as did the other changeling corpses in the area. The blood that was on my car evaporated while the lights washed over it, leaving a shiny dented mustang in its place. As I picked myself up, I got a good look at the waves of light that were coming from Ponyville, and I had only one thought.

...Was that a fucking Patronus Charm or something?

Whatever, I'm not even gonna question it. I gotta focus on getting out of here right now. Sitting up, I take a look at the corpse that was right on my legs. There was still a bit of foam leftover near the edge of its mouth, and it was laying down in a strange position. It's going to be hard to move, but not impossible. As I tried to push from my position, but I only succeeded in pushing myself down. Scratch that, it's impossible from where it is. How can something so small be that heavy?

After a couple more failed attempts, I look at my bokken and suddenly get an idea. Using it as a lever, I push as hard as I can upward, trying to roll it off my legs. Hearing cracking sounds, I continue the motion while wiggling my leg little by little out from under the changeling. I knew that it was already weakened from Telsona shaving a large chunk off from it, so I only had a matter of time to get out before it snaps. I managed to get a leg and a half free before my bokken snapped, leaving me with a broken piece starting from the hilt, and ending with a sharp, splintered piece the size of my forearm. Since I got so much of my leg free, it was easy to get the last part of it out after one last push. I rested a couple of seconds before I got up, the waves of light coming to a halt after a while.

Picking up the sword that almost killed me, I begin walking to the downed body of the changeling queen.The sword itself felt pretty balanced, I guess. It's still pretty fugly in my opinion. Coming within a few feet of the queen, I poked her side with her sword. As it made a small thud with each poke, akin to knocking on really thick cardboard, no movement came from her. The Patronus shit from earlier must have killed her, which I am really thankful for since I don't see how I could kill her even with an actual sword. At the very least, I might have been able to go after the chinks in her chitin and joints, but I don't think I would have been skilled enough to hit them.

...Wow, she's dead. I know Telsona tried to kill everyone and all, but that doesn't change the fact that she was once a living creature. Or that I killed all these changelings. At least with the normal ones, they were easier to kill since they were more like bugs then anything else. I almost felt bad, but I say "almost" because she and her bugs killed people who were just as alive as she was. It's still-

Nope, fuck it. I'm not getting philosophical. I just wanna leave before I get in any more bad situations.

Before I start to head to my car, I turn back to the deceased queen next to me.

"Don't talk shit about Tolkien!" I yelled in a raised voice as I gave a swift kick to her back. I kinda wished I didn't though. It literally felt like kicking a tree. After giving a silent curse and holding my boot whilst hopping in place for couple seconds, I hobbled back to my car.

Walking within feet of the car, I saw Applebloom in the window of the car, still looking scared. I was wondering she was scared of, until she pointed a hoof to something behind me. When I started to hear a cicada noise and the music from earlier behind me, I had an idea of who exactly was behind me.

You have got to be be fucking kidding me!

While turning with speed, I swung the sword in a horizontal strike towards her head, hoping to chop it off. The blade stopped with a padded thud right at the chitin on her neck. A few locks hair that I cut through fell down as she stared at me with an unamused expression.

"Really?" She questioned with a tone that matched her face. Rolling her eyes she grabbed me and threw me to the ground. Hard. I'm glad that breakfalls were one of the first things we were taught, otherwise I would have had the wind knocked out of me. I hit the spot where I was trapped before, and tried to get up only to be once more pinned, but this time with her hoof pressing down on my left bicep. Smacking her sword out of my other hand, she pinned my other arm to the ground. "Okay, let's try this again, from the top."

Telsona looked at her sword and did a slight nod...only for nothing to happen right now. She scrunched her eyebrows and nodded again at the sword only to have nothing happen yet again.

"Oh, come on!" She said, as she continued staring at her sword. I was wondering what was going on too, until I looked at the hooves she was pinning me with. I remembered what happened when I first got here, back when Trixie tried to get me out of the car.

First, Trixie had grabbed one of her fake knives from her magic acts, the kind that bends on impact. She laughed it off, albeit sheepishly, and ran back to grab a real knife from her soot-covered home. When she returned, the knife floated in her blue aura as she concentrated, moving it carefully toward me. But just as the blade touched my seatbelt, the magic aura fizzled out, and the knife dropped, clattering onto the floor.

Trixie blinked, her ears twitching as she frowned. “What...?” She hesitated before trying again, her magic gripping the knife firmly. This time, she seemed more focused, and the aura brightened as she brought it toward me. But once again, the moment the knife made contact with me, the blue glow vanished, and the knife fell.

She stepped back, her eyes narrowing. “Hey, what are you doing?” she demanded, her tone suspicious. “Are you messing with my magic?”

“What? No!” I raised my hands defensively. “I swear, I’m not doing anything. I have no idea why it’s not working.”

Trixie’s eyes flicked between me and the knife, her brow furrowed in confusion. She looked like she was trying to figure out if I was pulling some kind of trick. “This doesn’t make any sense...” she muttered, clearly unsettled.

Looking back at the struggling queen, I see that her magic is not working cause she's touching me. She can't get her sword. While that's convenient at the moment, I'm still not sure how I'm going to get out of here. Looking around, I saw the splintered piece of my bokken lying just an inch out of reach. If I could just move a little, I could probably reach it and do something. Anything that would help me get out of here.

As she stood over me with hooves against my arms, I realized that she forgot about my legs this time. I could probably kick her in a sensitive spot to stun her or something.

Anything that would help me get out of here, right?

Bending my leg, I deliver the most devastating kick I could give in an upward motion, hoping that would make her jump up in pain, and maybe free my arms. While I expected to hear a yelp or anything, i didn't expect to hear the sound I heard next.

*squech*

...I just kicked her vagina...

I tried frantically to pull my foot free, but her vaginal muscles clamped on my boots, not allowing any form of movement. The fight music stopped very suddenly, leaving nothing to listen to but the wind and awkward silence. To my surprise, no screams pain or movement came from Telsona, as she just stood there, frozen with eyes closed and her mouth open in an "o" shape. A soft sound comparable to a cricket chirping emitted from her mouth as she shifted her hips a little, finally opening her eyes and looking down at me.

I think I dun goofed.

At first she just stared with malice, but then after she blinked a couple times, her expression soften as it shifted into curiosity.

"Hmmmm, I wonder..." She asked herself. Taking a couple seconds to think, she pointed her horn towards my face and started to lower it. She started to move the jagged bone closer and closer, scaring me into thinking she was going to impale me. I braced myself for pain, only to be shocked as she brushed her horn on the side of my cheek a couple times. The horn scratched at my skin, but it wasn't enough to draw blood. When she gave a sharp gasp, she lifted her horn away quickly. "You're immune to magic!" She exclaimed with shock, which soon melted into a mix of both a mirthful and lecherous smile. "Well that explains some things." Immediately after that statement she let go of my foot, letting it fall to the ground. Without warning she let her body drop right on top of me, straddling me with her head right below my chin.

Scratch out what I said earlier about the changelings that were on top of me being heavy. This bitch was at least TWICE as heavy. She knocked all the wind out of me when she landed. As I struggled to catch my breath, she started to scoot herself upward until her face was level with mine, noses touching.

"Comfy, monkey?" She asked, her breath laced with the scent of...pine trees and tobacco? As strange as it was it was, it didn't change the fact that I still could barely breathe. I wheezed as I tried to tell her to get her fat ass off me. Telsona, enjoying the situation, responded in kind. "What's that? Oh, I'm sorry. One moment." She said as she shifts her legs up just a small amount, still clinging close to me but giving my chest and diaphragm room to move. "Better?" She asked with an inviting look.

I nodded hesitantly, wondering why she changed all of a sudden. A minute ago she was going to kill me, but now she was being all...this. It couldn't be just because I missed a vital area and accidentally boinked her with my foot.

"I don't know what you're playing at, but I don't think I'll like it." I said in a labored breath, finally being able to breath.

"You know nothing, Jon Snow." She said as she began to softly nuzzled the side of my cheeks.Really? "But that can be forgiven, as can your...mistake and meddling from earlier. The reason for this is because, luckily for you, you just made yourself very valuable."

"And how did I do tha-AHH!?!" I tried to asked, trying to ignore the small but painful bite she gave my shoulder. She lifted her head to look back at me. I saw a small amount of blood seeping from the side of her mouth, which she sensually licked clean with a long, ropey green tongue, making sure that I was watching.

"Let me put this in a way a monkey like you would understand. Your immunity to magic not only explains why you can resist me, but also lets you qualify for the new position of "Royal Toy"."

"...What?!?" I yelled out, flustered as I felt blood rise to my cheeks. This escalated very quickly.

"Oh, I think you heard exactly what I said." She said as she lowered her head to the left side of mine, letting her tongue flop out. I still kept trying to reach the broken piece of my bokken, trying to ignore the teasing licks she kept giving. I could just barely touch it, so now I just have to try and inch it closer to me. "You see *lick*, mmhm, salty, there would be certain advantages to having a creature like you that is immune to magic. While it's true that I never had a creature like you before," She shifted her head really close to my ear, which luckily for me she didn't notice that I was able to get two fingers around the broken bokken. Feeling the hot moisture from her breath, she whispered the next couple sentences in my ear. "I can be flexible. With training, you could provide and be provided with pleasure that only the Queens would deserve. You would be fed, have a home, and have the full attention of my sisters and I. You would be the sole focus of pleasure from beautiful mares that have been alive for many a year, and have had time to learn the secrets of the sexual arts." Telsona sang with growing excitement as she got a whimsical look. "I can just see it now. As my sisters and I have our fun with you, we would make you scream in pain and pleasure as our own personal love pet. You would beg for mercy from the relentless onslaught of carnal delight, and we would deny you again, and again," she put force into her next line by letting her tail snake her way into my jeans, letting her soft hair brush and coil itself around my rod, making me squirm in the alien pleasure. " And again. All we require is your complete obedience. Doesn't it sound tempting?" She cooed softly with cricket sounds as her tongue continued to tickle my jaw-line, occasionally switching to my bleeding shoulder.

"...and if I refuse?" I ask, already knowing the answer. Telsona started to answer but was interrupted when my car horn went off, honking multiple times. When she got startled her body, including her tail tightened on reflex, sending an unexpected burst of pleasure. I let out a small gasp, which thankfully I don't think she heard due to the constant noise coming from my car. Looking up and to her right, she looked straight at the window and glared at the culprit. Applebloom, who was honking my horn rapidly, noticed the look the changeling queen was giving her. The honking started to slow in tempo, until after one last honk, Applebloom retreated to the backseat where she was originally hiding. I'm thankful for that because I was finally able to grab my bokken. I didn't move to strike just yet however, since my arm was still pinned. I need to get myself free. Turning back towards me, Telsona opened her mouth and revealed a set of normal looking teeth. Well, normal when you exclude the sharp, curved canines she was displaying.

"Just because I can't kill you with my sword doesn't mean you are in a position of negotiation." She said as she moved a little closer to my neck. I winced and struggled, thinking she was going for the jugular or something, but relaxed a little when I just felt a wet kiss on the side of my neck. As if to form a seal, the queen presses her lips against it as she then swirled her tongue around and around. As quicky as she started, she pulled away, letting a loud "pop" from the suction of her hickey ring out. "So what's it going to be?"

...

This is the most uncomfortable boner I have ever had, and I watched anime.

Seriously, this stuff only happens in shitty fanfictions.

Thankfully, I didn't have to answer and either A: become her toy, or B: die. The reason for this was because of the sound that we were hearing. It sounded similar to jet flying in the sky, and it was coming from behind where I was laying. Telsona started to get annoyed by these constant interruptions and looked up to to the source.

"Can't I just have five UNINTERRUPTED minutes to mysel-" she started in pissed-off tone, but it soon died down as her eyes widened and I saw an emotion that I haven't seen from her yet.

Terror.

It was a drastic change for what this mare made herself out to be. Looking at what was behind me, I saw a dark blue object hurtling towards us, and it was emitting a thick black smoke in its trail. Looking back to Telsona, her eyes were wide as saucers and her lips trembled while she kept mumbling a mantra to herself.

"Happy thoughts during the day keep the darkness away. Happy thoughts during the day keep the nightmares at bay. " she uttered with a shaky voice and an almost trance like state with her pin-pricked pupils. I didn't give this much thought because she started to back up in a fearful manner, taking her hooves off of me. Seeing my chance, I thrust my splintered bokken as hard as I could into the softest spot I could see.

"EEEEIIIIIIAAHHH!!!" She let out a blood curdling scream as it plunged into her left eye socket, splattering a fairly decent amount of green blood over the handle and the sleeve of my shirt. The scream itself was loud enough to leave a dull ringing noise. She backpedaled as fast as she could as she held a hoof to her eye, trying to stop the bleeding. Turning to me and glaring with antipathy evident in her one good eye, she said a couple things, then green flames flashed brightly from her horn and straight at me. I raised my hands to protect myself as the flames that surrounded me temporarily blinded me. I felt nothing, however, and when I could see again I saw the area surrounding me was blacked like charcoal as grass smoulder-ed. Looking up I caught a glimpse of her form flying quickly into the Everfree forest with her sword strapped to her hips. I don't know what she said to me since my ears were still ringing, but I don't think she was inviting me for tea.

While my hearing was recovering, I tried to catch my breath and calm myself down from all the shit that happened throughout the last couple of minutes. I didn't get the chance to though, because that dark comet thing from earlier landed close by where the car was, about twenty yards. It left a small crater and a cloud of dust, obscuring whatever was inside. Soon, a silhouette appeared from within, and as the dust started to settle, a dark blue Alicorn was revealed.

Correction: My favorite dark blue Alicorn was revealed. I squealed like a fangirl on the inside when saw her.

Princess Luna started to emerge from the mini crater she created upon impact, dark vapors coalescing from her hooves and body. Constellations with an almost living personality shifted and moved in her mane as it flowed in the wind. She wore the same dark armor and jewelry from the series premier, as well as a predatory scowl as she took a couple steps towards me. Looking between my car and me, she spoke to me.

"Art thou the one who is called Edgar, or be you Changeling?" she asked in a bemused voice that was unlike the one I come to know and love from the show. It sounded more like...Nightmare Moon. Yea, that's what it sounded like, though I don't know why she sounded like that. I wasn't going to hold it against the best princess though, so I responded in kind.

"Yes. I am, your majesty." I told her, taking deep breaths in order to calm myself further. Princess Luna eyed me with a suspicious look and a raised eyebrow, as if searching for something.

"Do you... not fear us?"She asked as she tilted her head inquisitivly.

"I don't really know, should I?" I questioned back, trying to be mindful of what I say. I don't see how I ever could be scared of her. Her awkward personality and the old way she talks makes her so kawaii. Though she's acting more serious then what I am used to seeing on the show. That could be due to the fact that we are surrounded by corpses of the army that took over Ponyville briefly.

"Many ponies still fear us. Please forgive us if we expected a similar reaction." She said as she shook her head. Soon, the smoky gas that was surrounding her began to dissipate, and Luna took a deep breath inward, then released it slowly. As she exhaled, I heard her voice began to shift in pitch and attitude, changing from the "Nightmare Moony" voice from a minute ago to the voice I expected to hear when I first saw her. "It is not often we meet a brave creature such as yourself." She looked past me and to my car. "Or even a creature as strange as yourself to begin with. When Twilight mentioned a dragon-like creature helping Ponyville, I wasn't expecting a thing such as you, let alone the creature that is behind you. What is it's name?"

"What, my car?" I asked. Why does everyone keep thinking it's a living thing? It's getting kind of old.

"Mykar... Is that its name?" Luna asked me, before looking right at it. "SALUTATIONS, MYKAR. I AM PRINCESS LUNA OF EQUESTRIA. IT IS TRULY A WONDEROUS OCCASION TO GREET BOTH YOU AND YOUR FRIEND!!!" she yelled at my car using the Royal Canterlot voice.

Fuck, there goes my hearing again.

As I try to clean out my ears and fix my hair, Princess Luna waited patiently as she waited for my car to respond. After a couple moments, she looked back to me after I started to get some of my hearing back.

"Is your friend hard of hearing? Should we perhaps speak louder?" She asked with innocence.

"NO!" I yelled a little too quickly, hoping to avoid any permanent damage. "Just no. You don't need to talk to my car. It isn't really a living thing."

"Oh, we are sorry for yelling so loudly." Luna said as she looked down with a guilty expression. Awww, now I feel bad.

"Look, we got off on the wrong...hoof. Let's start over." I said, hoping to make her feel better. I cleared my throat and spoke in a friendly tone. "Hi, my name is Edgar. What is your name."

"We- I am Princess Luna." She said as she seemingly felt a little better. She looked over to my car once more and spoke once more. "If it's not alive, then what is it?"

"It's a car. It's like...well, you see...think of it like a carriage with an engine, like a train." I explained with difficulty. It shouldn't have been that hard, but I was more focused on the pain my eardrums had.

"It looks awfully small to be like any train I had ever seen." Luna said. She looked like she wanted to say more, but she didn't get the opportunity as armored pegasi and batponies bearing weapons and her cutiemark descended down on the area, carrying chariots full of more guards, weapons, and chains with glowing runes on them. They surrounded both me and my car, their spears pointed at me with intent to kill should I make any sudden moves.

"Drop your weapon, creature!" One of the thestral ponies yelled, leveling his spear to my kneecaps. I quickly dropped my splintered, Green-stained bokken and put my hands above my head in fear that this guy would cap me if I didn't.

"Stand down, guards! This creature is one of the ponies we have been searching for." Luna explained in a stern, commanding voice. When the guards didn't obey, I started to fear the worst. That is until Luna spoke one more time. "Bedtime, now stand down!"

The guards started lowering their spears after that, but kept a watchful eye on me and my mustang.

"We are sorry about that. When Changelings attack, we cannot order our guards to do anything until we say a phrase that day." Princess Luna scanned the area, taking note of all the dead Changelings. "Speaking of which, did you see what happened here?"

"Yeaaa, well this was mostly my doing." I said while nodding my head. Luna simply stared at me wide-eyed. She was looking at the green blood that stained my grey T-shirt, as well as looking at the bokken piece that I dropped. After switching back and forth a couple times, she finally rested her eyes on me in disbelief.

"You," she said as she pointed at me. She then moved her hoof to point at the dead changelings. "Did all this...," she then pointed to the bloody, broken bokken sword on the grass. "...With that?!?" She asked with awe.

"Well actually I didn't do it with just this. Actually it was -" I said as I turned to my car. I was about to give credit where credit was due, but then I thought back to something my theatre teacher said to me.

-----------------------------

"You can't just pretend to be the main character of your own story, having everything handed to him on a silver platter. You can't just sit at home on the computer waiting for your destiny; otherwise, it will pass you by. You have to man up and take charge of who you will be, or you might end up just sitting on the computer day in and day out looking at your cat videos..."

----------------------------

Just who am I going to be?

Back home, I really wasn't much. I had games, acting, movies, and Aikido. That was pretty much it.

But here?

Here I can be anything I wanted to be right now. Any personality… any backstory… it's mine for the taking. I could be a Superman, an alien from a world light years away, eager to help all I meet. I could be a Captain Kirk, an explorer who is eager to explore this brave new frontier, or maybe even something as simple as a lost author who had the misfortune of getting sent to this strange land. There is basically no limit to all the things I could do here, all the people I could be.

Don't get me wrong, I still fully intend to get home as soon as possible, but before I go I should probably have some fun. After all, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. My one chance to be extraordinary, and I may not ever get a chance like this again.

You understand, right?

My car got all the blood cleaned off by whatever that light pulse was, so aside from dents and scratches it was in a pristine condition. My bokken and shirt, on the other hand, got stained from blood splatter after I stabbed Telsona in the eye. Taking off my bloodstained shirt and tossing it on the ground like this was an everyday thing, I continued what I was going to say, only with a minor change. "...wasn't broken until about thirty or so Changelings." I said in a nonchalant tone, causing the guards that were still at the chariots to do a double take with surprised looks. Now that I had them hooked, I channeled the spirit of the ancient Roman God, Bullshiticus, to aid me in lying. "It used to be in a lot better condition, but it broke and I was stuck with that thing for the rest of the Changeling. I wish I had my staff instead, that way I would have been able to probably take on Telsona too."

The guards that still held their spears looked at me with in underlaying fear, with the revelation that they were just threatening a being that could do this to an army.

"The stallion who took on an entire changeling army...has nipples." A female bat pony from the left said in a disbelieving tone.

"Are we sure it's a stallion? We don't even know what it is." Another mare called out.

"Forget the fact that he has nipples," a unicorn stallion called out in a frightened voice. "Let's talk about the fact that we were just threatening a creature that took on an army of changelings with a wooden stick!"

"And a changeling queen, let's not forget about that." I added. The guards started to seem more and more worried, which seemed more counter-productive. I wanted them to believe that I could do all this stuff, but not fear me. "Don't worry, friends. I only go after those who would hurt others, and those changelings were going to hurt a little filly named Applebloom." I said in a calming manner, attempting to settle them down. While the guards relaxed a little, Luna's ears perked up at the mention of the filly.

"Did you say Applebloom? You wouldn't happen to know where she is at the moment, would you?" Luna asked me, a small amount of distrust and fear evident in her tone.

"Sure, she's inside my car. One second." I said while i started to walk over to the driver's side. Hearing armor rustle, I saw that the guards all tensed up. Moving even more slowly and cautiously, I place my hand on the handle. "I'm going to open the car now. Please do not stab me." I say slowly and clearly. When I opened the door, sitting on the passenger seat was Applebloom. She hopped from the seat and wraped me in a surprisingly strong hug. Not enough to do anything serious since she was just a filly, but enough to show that it would be hard for her to let go. Her fur against my bare chest made it feel like I was getting hugged by a fluffy dog.

"Mister Angel, you're alive!" She said with a slight relief. " Ya looked real bad, an' when she threw ya on the ground, ah thought tha-

"Yea yea, I'm alright. I'm an angel, remember? We're gonna be alright, now that Princess Luna and her guards are here." I interrupted, trying to get her to think happy thoughts. This whole thing has just been a giant mess, hasn't it? When we broke the hug, Applebloom looked at Luna with excitement at first, but then it shifted into a frown as Applebloom just stared at her like she didn't trust her. I wondered what could have caused this for a second, but after a second of thinking I got a pretty good idea. "My angel sense says she's in the clear" I whispered to the suspicious filly. She perked up a look and soon switched from being distrustful to accepting.

"Heya Princess, can we go home now?" She asked innocently, earning some chuckles from everybody.

"Yes, young Applebloom. It is indeed time for us to return." She said as she turned look at me. "Does your train still work?" She asked, obviously taking about the car. Walking to the front of my car, I lift up the hood and inspect it. I know off the top of my head that the battery needs a recharge from earlier, but I need to make sure that th- Sweet mother of Nicholas Cage, it's hideous!!!

There was a Changeling horn lodged on the inside of the camshaft. Has that been there the entire time I was running over Changelings? That could not have been good for the engine. I mean, I guess we could still try it, but I don't know if it will work. Yanking the horn out ever so delicately, I look back at Luna.

"Well, maybe. There a bunch of different things that it could need." I explained to them. First things first though, we have to get the battery running. I took a seat inside my car and got ready to turn the keys. "Would one of you guys hit this box here with some electricity?" I yelled out the the group of guards.

At first, none made any moves. When Luna motioned for the guards to do something however, the unicorn that spoke earlier walked up tentatively and aimed his horn at the box. He then shot a continuous ark of electricity at it for a couple seconds. It should have been enough to get the battey going.

"Thanks bud!" I yelled from the inside as I turned the keys to the ignition. The radio, the front lights, and air conditioning were working just fine. I wish I could say the same about the engine. The second I turned the keys far enough to get it started, it made an ugly sound akin to someone rattling a jug filled with nails. When I heard this, I shifted my keys as fast as I can in reverse, hoping that I didn't damage the engine anymore then I already did. I turned to my left and saw Luna right outside my door, waiting for an answer. "It's a no-go. The engines messed up, and I really don't wanna push its limits too much."

Luna nodded in understanding, and turned towards her earthpony guards.

"Grab some of the chains we brought. We shall pull his car into Ponyville." She declared to the guards. As they moved to grab the rune-emblazoned chains off their chariots, I started to get up to help them. I was stopped, however, by a hard but smooth dark blue hoof pressing down on my chest and forcing me to sit back down. Looking up, I saw that Luna was the owner of the hoof. Her hair was no longer floating, and simply hung off her head. "You are not going anywhere."

"Hey, I wasn't going anywhere. I was ju-" I started to get up, but I started to feel a sharp pain where Luna was pressing, making me gasp. Looking down, I noticed quite a couple bruises all around my body, most noticeable ones being around my ribcage. I felt Luna's hoof shift, leaving a small tingling sensation as her hoof trailed away from the spot she was holding her hoof and revealing another bruise. Some of them looked about a day old, while others looked like they were just starting to form. I only now just started to notice all these after taking off my shirt. They must have happened yesterday with the dragon, and today with Telsona.

"After a battle like the one you just fought, you're practically running on adrenaline. You may not feel it right now, but after it fades you will start to feel a lot of pain, judging from the sizes of these bruises and all the cuts you have. For now, you have done quite enough for Equestria." Luna said as she took her hoof off of me, her hair going back the ethereal wave it was known for. She didn't even seem to acknowledge it as the guards finished hooking the chains under my car. They started pulling to test the chains, but got nowhere as the car wouldn't budge. When I shifted the gear into neutral so it would be easier to pull, Luna addressed me once more. "As I said, you are going nowhere. At least until we arrive into Ponyville. Are. We. Clear?" Luna punctuated each word after that in a stern voice, like how a mother would talk to a child.

I nodded, not wanting to raise any argument with her, and she signaled for the guards to start pulling as the rest served as an escort for us. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her pick up my shirt and the two pieces of my bokken and toss them in the back of one of her chariots.

I closed my door and reclined my seat back, already starting to feel a dull but small pounding sensation on the bruises, which made me thankful that Luna telling me to take it easy. The part that sucks is now I just have to sit here and do nothing now. As the guards pulled us along, I look over to Applebloom, hoping to maybe talk to her and pass the time.

She was sitting in the passenger seat, just staring out the window. This has been a rough day for her, so I don't blame her for being quiet. That's not going to stop me from trying to talk to her though. The only question is, what do I say? I can't just go up and say "hey... sorry you almost got burnt alive and foalnapped." Trying to think of some way to break the ice, I look around the car for any ideas. My eyes eventually settled on one thing that just might work.

"Hey Applebloom," I called as I fiddled with some buttons and nobs on the radio, switching it to CD. Her ears perked up, and she looked at me attentively. "Do you like music?"

Author's Note

Hey, sorry that took so long, I just had a lot of projects at work and I needed to get some shit done. Big thank you to those who support me and this story. Leave a comment if you enjoyed this chapter or if you have anything you liked or disliked in particular. I will make it a point to read every comment that is published.

Sorry if this chapter was a poorer quality then the last one. I have no excuse other then the fact that I was tired.

Thx again to portal82 and knightofstories for some superb storytelling ideas. Seriously, props

Chapter Seven: ...Even more introductions.
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Seven: ...Even more introductions.

"War does not determine who is right, only who is left."

-Bertrand Russell

***Edgar's POV,
Fields outside Ponyville***

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"...How bout now?"

"No."

"Now?

"Yes."

"Really?"

"No." The bat pony guard to the passenger side of us told Applebloom with a neutral but stern voice. Wow, these guys have the patience of a monk on marijuana. Seriously, this little escapade went on for about ten minutes and not once have any of the guards nor the princess that was walking beside us shown a bit of annoyance. Frankly, I wasn't the least bit annoyed because I was too busy focusing on staring outside the car to really let myself notice what they were saying. Once we were far enough from the corpses of the changeling, taking in the natural and familiar beauty of this place was actually pretty relaxing. When I watched the show, I thought that most of the ways they designed trees and flowers and all that was a little "cutesie" for my taste, but with the vivid details that I can now see that has all changed. It reminds me a lot of how the greenery looked in that one "Oz" movie was, except... More real, and at the same time more fake. I don't know how else to explain it, it just is.

After giving an over exaggerated sigh, Applebloom gave up on asking questions and turned to me.

"Can we listen to more of that music now?"

"No." Luna answered before me. She had been walking beside us as we were being pulled for quite a while, almost as if to keep an eye on Applebloom and I. While she said that it was only to make sure we would be alright, I wouldn't doubt that there would be a secondary reason for keeping such a close eye on us. "At least until we understand what caused the outburst of Melody magic to overtake the music from Sir Edgar's tram. Until that time, there is to be no music."

Applebloom looked to me, hoping that I was going to at least plead her case to Luna.

"I think we should listen to the princess. They were really starting to creep me out." If I had it my way, I would have chosen to play my Disney CD the entire trip to town. It was completely fine when the first song, "When You Wish Upon A Star", played. In fact, Luna actually seemed to enjoy that one a lot.

Go figure.

Strangely enough, after a couple more songs the guards started to get a little..."Jolly". While this doesn't sound bad yet, it started to get a tad bit creepy when their eyes started to glaze over and their normal stern expression turned into a dopey kind of smile. The music went on up until Luna noticed that the guards started to mumble the song "A Girl Worth Fighting For" under their breath, and were marching to the rhythm of the song. I know those songs were catchy and all, but there is no way they could have known the lyrics to it. The part that crossed the line with Luna, however, was when the guard sang about loving his fantasy girl's cooking. He, being a unicorn, talked about beef, pork and chicken, as if it was his favorite. When I stopped the song, he, nor any of the other guards had any recollection of what they said.

Applebloom let out a defeated grunt as she just slumped down in her seat, just tapping the front of the console. I think it was my stereo that caused it. I didn't want to bring it up because I didn't know why it happened, or even if it was the sole cause of whatever Luna was talking about.

"Hmm, that's surprising." Luna said with a skeptical gaze that was coupled with a single raised eyebrow. "And here we thought thou lacked the emotion of fear, or didn't know when to be afraid."

"What makes you say that?" I asked.

"Its nothing really. We simply find it curious that not only did you just take on an army of changelings and their Queen, but you showed no fear of us when we arrived. Until now, I came to the conclusion that you didn't fear, or even know what it was." She explained.

"Well, I still get scared pretty easily, And a lot of times it's over the littlest things. Like when you see a spider in your room, and you take your eyes off it for a second to get something to smash it, only for it to not be there. Now that's the stuff of nightmares." I joked with a chuckle. Well, not really joked, since I really do fear the littlest and most unusual things. I gotta cover my feet with the blanket when I go to bed so nothing eats them, and I gotta check the toilet rims before I go to the bathroom to make sure there isn't a snake in the toilet. Luna didn't seem very amused though, so I continued with what I was saying. "Ahem, that being said, I didn't really see a reason to fear you." I said honestly. From examples of my history class to plot twists in books and television shows, I didn't really like the idea of dealing with the government or any governmental figures because of how they looked. Call it paranoia or an unnecessary fear if you want, but I was always scared that that something bad would happen. With Luna or any other pony however, I feel like I know her better then I would know Obama, or any political leader. Seeing them time and time again makes me feel like I could trust them.

Luna did not seem satisfied with that answer though, as her face seemed to show doubt.

"Really? We find that very hard to believe. Some would have attributed your bravery as ignorance of our nature, but you addressed us as "your majesty". Thou must know of us." She pointed out, still keeping her gaze straight forward. Shit, I really gotta stop doing that. Luna continued her elaboration as she walked in a more regal and loud way. "You knew that I am Princess Luna, that I was Nightmare Moon. I was the mare on the Moon and I almost brought eternal darkness to Equestria, yet you reacted to my old form no different then you react to me right now. Is that not clear? Are you truly not bothered by that?"

Ooooooohh. See, that makes a little more sense. Apparently, when she sounded like Nightmare she looked like her too. I guess I just didn't see it for whatever reason.

"Oh well, Truth be told when you first showed up, I couldn't really see a difference between you and Nightmare Moon." I told her.

...wow, that sounded a lot better in my head.

I was affirmed of my mistake when I noticed the guards dropping their straight faces to cringe as Luna became agitated, almost stomping as she walked along us. Breathing heavily out of her nostrils, she looked toward me as if she was about to chew my head off, only to turn back to where she was looking with pursed lips.

We continued walking for about eight agonizingly long seconds until the silence was a little too awkward for me to handle.

"Hey, I know what I said sounded bad, but it's not what y-" I wanted to continue, but Luna interrupted me with a huff.

"We heard thy words clearly, foreigner." Luna spat. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that some of the guards that were still walking with us were eyeing the situation with interest. Out of all of them, the Pegasus ponies had the widest eyes after she said "foreigner". "Like everypony else, you obviously think that I am still a monster, that I'm still the horrible pony from before."

"Nooo no no no, that's not what I meant at all." I defended. "I meant to say that when you first showed up, I only saw you as how you look right now. As the nice and gentle Princess that saved me a couple minutes ago." Technically, that was true, since I didn't see the illusion thing she had going on. "I promise, I would probably be the last person to judging you." And that was true in every possible way. Heck, I could probably count all the MLP fans in the world who didn't like Luna on one hand. Luna turned to me still visibly angry, but that soon dissipated when she stared at me for a while longer.

"...You really mean that, don't you?" She asked in a noticeably-less pissed off voice.

"Why would I automatically assume that you are evil? I just met you." I reassured her.

"...You're right. We have just met, have we?" Luna looked as if she was in thought for a couple minutes, but then looked forward to one of the guards way in the front. "What was that Sidearm? We shall come posthaste!" She said quickly as she speed up her pace as she walked to the front. I didn't hear any guard call her name, though. I should probably stop over analyzing it, since it doesn't matter as much right now. The most important thing is that I am pretty sure she isn't as pissed at me as she was before.

For about a minute or so, I was stuck trying to find a way to entertain myself. I didn't want to talk to or say anything to Applebloom because I know that if she is anything like my little sisters, or any kid for that matter, she is gonna say something about the mini-fight me and Luna had. I really don't wanna deal with that level of awkward righ-

"Heeey~" A deep female voice called in a hushed tone from my driver side window. I turned my head to find out who interrupted my thoughts see a bat pony fully clad in armor like any other thestral guard I saw from the show and just now. The only really distinguishing features I can see right now is the dark grey coat they were known for, small locks of dark azure(almost blackish) hair with red highlights peeking from the bottom of her helmet, and her piercing and contradicting vermilion eyes. They seemed almost mysterious. Dangerous, yet they weren't dangerous to me. I almost found myself lost in those hypnotic orbs until she waved her hoof in front of me a little. "You okay?" She asked me, knocking me out of my pseudo-trance.

"Uh, yea. Sorry, it's been a long day." I told the guard.

Now that I'm not spacing out, I can confidently say she looks like an OC that someone who works at Hot Topic would come up with. Though she doesn't look cringey or anything. Her colors blend fairly well for a dracula-esque aesthetic.

"Heh, I can relate." She said quietly as she looked to her left and right. As she finished looking around she leaned in a little closer and started to speak again. "Soooo, on behalf of the lunar guard, "Thanks". Any other day, you would have made the Princess's week."

"...If this is about the haphazard apology, I meant every word of it." I told her as I rubbed side of my shoulder, since it was starting to feel sore.

"Whether you meant it or not, the Princess is in a much better mood now than she was a few minutes ago. She is a nice mare once you get to know her, but it still doesn't stop ponies from shaking and shivering when they first meet her. Except you that is." The guard said. "You did say something stupid earlier, but you fixed it. I mean just look at what you did to her, you charmer you." She lightly teased as she tilted her head a couple times, beckoning me to look at the lunar monarch.

Princess Luna was talking and walking with with one of the pegasi guards up front with the same royal poker face that she had since we started walking. I didn't really see anything noteworthy about her being happy. I mean she coughed a couple times and her ears flicked once in attempt to listen to something, but that's about it. She had a stern poker face the entire time.

"Wow, look at all that "happy" that's going on right now." I sarcastically spouted. The guard just sighed and nodded.

"Okay, I admit it's a bit hard to see for the untrained eye. Needless to say, Luna appreciates it, and we really appreciate it. You earned yourself some brownie points, Babe." She told me as she looked around once more to check if anyone was watching.

"Ah. Well thanks, I guess." I simply acknowledged, not paying much attention to what she was saying, but instead thinking about what happened not too long ago. What Ponyville just went through was something that towns in even the more violent regions of Earth were lucky enough not to go through, and I can't imagine how everybody is taking it over there. When it comes to events like this, there are no winners. There are only those who lose less. I just hope that the Ponies aren't taking it too hard.

And no, I'm not trying to be a holier-than-thou shining knight here. I just know that there's probably going to be a ton of depressing stories. I don't want my first real visit to Ponyville to be gloomy, and I definitely don't want to go with a whole bunch of tearjerkers and the like. It's not supposed to be like this.

Then again, I could possibly write a popular book series based off then and make millions. I want to have an extraordinary adventure, with swords and actions and heroic miracles that come out of nowhere.

" Maybe I'm being a bit too subtle." The guard told me, focusing her deep cinnabar eyes onto mine. "I also really appreciate what you done for us. For Luna and this town."

"If you're really that thankful, you could send me a gift basket." I said.

"...Okay, I'm not gonna say anything else. I'm just gonna let what happens be a surprise." She said, her lips curling into a mischievous smile as she seemed to be playing with whatever idea she had beneath that helmet. The slightly larger thestral to the right passenger side coughed a little as he his eyes shifted to the guard that was just talking to me. "Uh oh, looks like I gotta shut up. For now, just try to not let what Luna said bother you. We are all a bit emotional right now."

"What do you mean by that?" I turned to ask her, wanting to know what she meant by ignoring what Luna said. When I saw her, she was looking straight ahead with the same glare that every one of the guards had, ignoring what I was saying. "Hello? HELLLLOOOOOO?!?" I provoked, trying to get a response from her, but to no avail. I sighed and rolled up my windows. I'm not going get anything else out of her, so there's no point in wasting the air conditioning.

Well that's maddeningly unhelpful. You can't just hook someone in with something interesting and not finish it. She didn't even give me her name.

I didn't get to think about it for long though, since we are almost at Ponyville anyway. I know because we were coming up to the hill Trixie and I passed when I was going to Ponyville. Speaking of which, what was she doing back there? Where did she go?

S̤̰͇͉͉̳ͅh̬̲̮̪͍̭e̝͢ ̛̺̺ͅͅa̪̖̳͙̭̞͞b̜̯̤̭a̖̫̰n̴̺̖̹̱͙d͎̗̹̲̝̪ͅǫ̘̞n̥̺͕͈̦e̲̣d̰͈͈͈̗̗̭̕ ̖̕y̟̳̩͙͡o̴̲͙ͅu̜

"Huh, did you say something Applebloom?"

"Nuh uh, ah was just humming to myself."

Weird, I could have sworn I heard something. Back to the matter at hand, I'm sure that Trixie and the Mane Six had a good reason for not being there. I mean, Trixie's not the mare from before, right? I wonder what she's doing right now?

Twilight's POV, Ponyville

"Ooooooh, this waiting is killing me!!! They should be back by now." Trixie commented, her signs of annoyance creeping as her ears kept flicking. Having that breezy up there might not be all that helpful.

"You seem pretty worried for your pal." Rainbow dash commented. "You must two go way back huh. How come we never saw him?"

We were all standing at the town square, waiting for Luna to come back, hopefully with Edgar and Applebloom. Applejack was comforting Big Macintosh as he got one of his legs wrapped by one of the freed nurses. He was insistent with staying with us, but he couldn't really move much because of the pain he was in due to what the changelings probably did to him. Although he limped a bit on one of his back legs, he seemed relatively fine. Nevertheless, he had to get it treated as best he could until the castle infirmary treated the most injured of the town. Big Mac laid against one of the overturned Apple carts he brought into town earlier, Applejack close to his side as they kept reassuring each other about Applebloom's safety.

Luna hasn't been gone for very long. I would say that she's been gone for couple minutes, but I can still see how that would seem like forever for both Trixie and the Apples. Applejack has been hysterical for her sister's saftey ever since this whole fiasco has started, and Trixie...

"...Suuuure, if you could call meeting him last night going way back." She with a sheepish laugh, getting our attention very quickly with that revelation.

What?

Looking back and forth between us, Trixie shook her head at our shock.

"It's a Loooong story."

"Ohmygosh, you just made friends with him yesterday? This calls for a "WOOHOO, Trixie made a friend" Party!!!" Pinkie yelled as she hopped around in the way she always did when something exciting happened. On her fourth jump however, she froze in the middle of her jump as a look of shocked realization replaced her excitement. Still floating in mid-air, she turned her head toward Sugarcube Corner and the destruction around it. "I can't host a party right now... Ponyville is a mess." She slowly descended from her physics defying feat as her mane started to droop. "Maaaybe could host it at the castle! That's a good party place, right?" After that realization, her mane livened up again as she got into her normal bubbly mood. "But how would I send the invitations if some of the mailboxes were gone?" Aaaaaaaand it's gone. "Maybe I could get a spotlight and a pair of scissors, and then I could...

As she continued to bounce between hope and despair about her parties, I couldn't stop thinking about what Trixie just said. If what she said was true, then why exactly WAS Trixie so worried about him. While I understand that we all can get worried over our friends, there is no way she could get that worried if she had have been friends with him for that long. Before I could question her about it, I was stopped by a voice.

"Something on your mind, darling?"

"Mmmh? Oh, not really. I was just thinking."

"About?"

Trixie was far enough away, and Pinkie was still rambling on about things that could go wrong or right if she decided to throw a party (Seriously, what is a Spanish Inquisition?), so I didn't have to lower my voice when I said this. I still lowered it anyway just to be safe.

"Look at Applejack, and then look at Trixie." I told her, and she obliged. At first, it didn't look like she saw what I was talking about. Even when she finally saw it, she didn't seem to react very much.

"She's having the same reaction as Applejack, So what? Anypony would react the same way if someone they cared about was in danger, so I don't really see what the fuss is about."

"I can understand why Applejack is acting like that. It's her sister that's missing, after all , but Trixie only knew him for a day. There's just no way they could have become that good of friends." As I gave my explanation, Rarity looked at me more and more like was crazy. Shaking my head, I continued. "I know it's probably just my paranoia, but It just doesn't make any sense."

Rarity seemed to think on what I said, before turning and looking at Trixie. After about a moment or so, she sighed and finally gave in.

"Alright darling, if you are really that worried about it, then I'll keep my eye on things. Maybe I can see what I can dig up." She told me with a wink.

"Thanks again, Rarity." I said gratefully. It's probably nothing, but I don't want to take any chances. After all, the last couple times I listened my instincts, they were usually correct. It's kind of hard to concentrate while Pinkie keeps talking about things that can or can't go wrong, however.

"But there's no way I have enough cake mix for both Ponyville AND Edgar, and now that they're here, there's no way I can order more in time for all those parties..." and like she has been for the past couple minutes, she perked up quickly as a flare of genius flashed across her muzzle. "Unless I combine all the parties! Yea, I can turn it into a giant rave, and then I can get them all done at once."

Wait, they're here???

Apparently I wasn't the only one to notice what she said as both Applejack and Big Mac perked their ears, listening intently to what she said.

"Care 'ta repeat that sugarcube?" She asked in a serious but hopeful tone.

"I said I could probably throw a really big party for everypony, that way I only have to worry about one party to make super duper incredible. Do you think you can bring enough Apple juice for the town, AJ?" Pinkie asked her innocently, oblivious to what she meant. Big Mac grunted in annoyance.

"Before that." He clarified with a huff.

"Oh, you mean the part where I pointed out Princess Luna and her guards dragging the dragon-thingy into town? They're over there," She remarked as she pointed down the road leading to the fields. "By the way, what kind of cake do you think they would like?"

Sure enough, we saw the battalion of guards in the distance. The battalion, headed by Princess Luna, were currently marching toward us at a snail's pace. Behind them, Trixies friend was being pulled to Ponyville wrapped in the dampening chains the Royal Guards brought with them. The chains themselves were made of iron that had been dipped in a solution of lead and sea salt, with shielding and dampening runes etched into the metal. The chains were made specifically for binding dangerous magical forces, anything from a rouge unicorn to Tirek himself would be rendered near-harmless in those chains... the ones that were currently wrapped under Edgar.

If he was as good as Trixie said he was, then why was he bound?

As those glowing eyes of his peered into mine from behind the guards, the ominous light emanating from them forced me to avert my gaze over to Trixie, whom I was hoping would give some form of explanation. Anything to counter the creeping suspicions that were going through my head, but all I saw was the giddy expression that was plastered on her muzzle. She almost wiggled in place as she saw them draw closer.

***Third person Pov.***

Trixie's heart was starting to slow it's pounding in her chest as she started to calm down a little. She was relieved as soon as she saw his car being pulled by the Royal guards. Neither her, nor any of the other ponies could really see anything inside the car because of the tinted windows, but the fact that the lights in the front were on meant that he had to be alive. It's not like anypony else knew how that thing worked. As the guards marched along toward them, the other villagers of this hamlet eyeing the car with fear and distrust. Mothers and fathers averted the eyes of their foals as the royal guards that remained in the town stepped forward in an aggressive stance, as if trying to stare the machine into submission.

Finally, after an excruciatingly long ten minutes of watching the guards pace towards them, Princess Luna arrived within talking distance.

"The changeling threat has been dealt with for now. I take it the recovery of town is proceeding just as well, Twilight?" Luna asked. Twilight was busy looking over the creature for a moment, before turning back to Luna.

"Uh, yes. It's going very well. We already have the best doctors in the town inside the castle infirmary helping to treat most of the injured along with the field medics you brought. There are some injuries that have to be stabilized right now, before being moved to the castle, however." Twilight explained. "The food relief is being split evenly, with half going to the population and the other half going into storage for the next couple of days. While it seems like it's going to be rough for the next couple of days, I think we will pull through well."

"Ah, excellent." Luna praised. "And the deceased?"

"...Being removed from the public eye for now." Twilight assured with a slight hesitation. She looked like she was thinking about something, and then she spoke again."Princess, what about-" she started but stopped herself.

"What about what, Twilight?" Luna questioned, still intrigued at what she had to say. Twilight didn't say anything, but instead tapped head with her hoof. After a nod from Luna, they waited couple seconds before Luna spoke again. "There is no need to worry about that, for we have already thought of a solution for it. We must wait for our sister to enact it, however."

"Um, do you mean for the first thing, or the last?" Twilight asked, hoping for more clarity in their silent conversation.

"Both situations, but for the latter, we do not think it would be much of an issue."

"Um, your majesties?" a quiet, shaky voice called out. "I don't want to interrupt or anything, but, um, could we maybe talk about that," Fluttershy took a gulp before finishing the next part of her question. "D-d-Dragon you found?"

"Forget the Dragon, that things hooked up with chains an' surrounded by two alicorns an' a group of guards. It ain't goin nowhere, so it can wait." Applejack growled. "Where... is... Applebloom!"

"Firstly, it is not a dragon." Luna told the aggressive earth pony, "Secondly, we did manage to find her unharmed." Applejack let out a sigh of happy relief after hearing that, and soon she shook her head back and forth, looking for her sister.

"Applebloom, where are ya!?!" She called out.

"Ah'm in here, Applejack!" Applebloom's voice called out from inside the car.

"Oh, thank goodness she's alright." Trixie said, letting out another relieved breath. They could not have been luckier in her opinion.

However, Applejack had not torn her gaze from the seemingly malicious, flashing eyes of the creature. Soon however, the blood drained from her face when she heard the implications of what she heard.

"It ate Applebloom..."

"-And here I thought this wasn't gonna e- wait what?" Trixie asked in surprise, dropping her excited demeanor and replacing it with a wide eyes and raised eyebrows.

"It ATE MAH SISTER!!!" She shrieked as a haze of fear for her sister's life surrounded her. "DON'T WORRY APPLEBLOOM! AH'LL GETCHA OUTTA THERE!!!" She yelled as she charged at the car, fueled by desperation and rage.

"Applejack, it's not what it looks li-" Trixie tried to defend, but was too late as Applejack turned and delivered the mother of all kicks to the bumper of Edgar's mustang, rocking it backwards by about six inches. The impact let out a resounding crash as the bumper and a little bit of the front side of the hood folded inward. Satisfied with what she had done, she pulled her legs away from the point of impact, leaving two hoof-sized craters on it. Everypony stared slack-jawed and the damage this creature had sustained.

"What the BUCK, you hillfilly?!?" Trixie yelled.

"You'll think twice before ya think about eatin' another pony." She triumphantly told the car, before turning back toward Trixie with a look that could kill a small rhinoceros. "You told me he wouldn't hurt her!" Applejack growled, putting Trixie on the spot. Her eyes were puffy and red from the amount of frustration and the times she had been reduced to tears this day, but she ran out of them a about twenty minutes ago. Instead, it only served to amplify the illusion of her rage. Trixie looked left and right nervously before backing up a few steps...before she suddenly stopped. Tilting her neck up to try and look taller, Trixies horn started to glow as her eyes narrowed at Applejack. Before they could practically pounce on each other, Princess Luna intervened.

"He didn't." Princess Luna interjected with a stern gaze, standing in front of Applejack and Trixie. "Edgar was merely protecting her. She was not eaten, nor is she in any form of danger right now." Her point was emphasized when Applebloom jumped out of the passenger window that was rolled down and ran to her sister and embraced her.

At first, Applejack could do nothing but fall to her rump and stare off into space, before she finally returned the hug tightly, squeezing her eyes shut as she started to choke back sobs. The eyes that ran dry from tears soon had a newfound supply, but unlike her previous bursts of wet anger, these were tears of joy. After everything that happened today and against unfathomable odds, her sister is alive and well. It was a miracle, one that was shared with Big Macintosh, who hobbled over as fast as possible with an injured leg to join in, turning it into a group hug.

"Don't worry Applejack, ah'm alright."

"Eeyup." Big Macintosh simply stated, knowing that he didn't really need to say anything else.

"Cutiemarks in Changeling fighting? The hell were you fillies thinking?" Applejack reprimanded, trying to sound stern, but failing miserably as her happiness leaked through one of her eyes and tone while she nuzzled her sister.

"You ain't gonna try an' hurt Edgar again, are ya?" Applebloom asked with the big eyes that little sisters are often famous for. "He really is a nice stallion once ya get to know 'em."

She opened her eyes once more, looking at the unicorn she was just yelling at. Hesitantly letting go of her sister, Applejack stood up and swallowed her pride. "Ah reckon ah owe you an apology." Applejack said while tracing a circle into the dirt before looking back to Edgar's car. She cringed at the damage she caused to what she thought was a living creature. "...To the both of ya."

Trixie already said he was in bad shape, but she was just so stressed and worried for Applebloom that she forgot all about it and rushed in like she always has. She just hoped Edgar wouldn't be too mad.

"Edgar" said nothing to her, nor did he make any effort to show expression. His glowing eyes just stared onward into the distance in front of him. All of a sudden, the light that emanated from him started to dim more and more until there wasn't a single glow at all. The Mane Six along with Spike just stared at the creature, not being entirely sure of what happened until Rainbow Dash spoke out.

"Uhhh, did that thing just...die?" She asked no one in particular.

"Oh no, that poor creature." Fluttershy said solemnly with her head hung low, walking toward the creature to close it's eyes and send it off into a peaceful slumber.

"What? No, y'all got it all wrong. he ain't dea-" Applebloom tried to say, but was inturrupted when her sister pulled her into another hug.

"A-a-ah'm so sorry, Applebloom. ah didn't mean to buck him so hard, but ah was just so worried about ya." Applejack soothed, stroking her mane in a comforting manner. Applebloom opened her mouth to try and speak, but her older sister cupped her hoof over her mouth, silencing her. "Shh shh shh, It's gonna be alright. I know things like this are hard to accept, but it's all a part of life. You're gonna be alright."

Applebloom, still trying to talk through the hoof, was starting to get annoyed at this, while Luna and the guards who were with her were watching in mild amusement. Applebloom didn't have to wait much longer to get her point across however, for right as Fluttershy came within two feet of the creature, its side opened up, causing almost everypony in the area to gasp, along with the fainting of three florists. The sudden motion gave Fluttershy about the worst jump scare she ever had, her wide eyes and motionless making her look like a deer in headlights. She stared at the opening, wondering what the hay just happened until another creature came out. It was a hairless biped, save for the medium cut mane on its head. To her, it looked a lot like either an ape, or a small mutated Minotaur. Either way, it looked incredibly ticked off. Even some of the guards that escorted it eyed it warily as it walked with a slight limp towards Fluttershy. It stumbled a little bit before placing its hands on the black creature's side and using it as support.

As he drew nearer, Fluttershy prepared herself for the worst, but nothing horrible came. He simply stopped right in front of the black creature from whence he emerged and, with an almost sullen mood, ran its paw delicately and affectionately across the dents and craters along the front of the black creature's armor.

"Edgar," Trixie said, breaking everypony out of their bewilderment. "Are you...Alright?" She asked, getting a little worried and weirded out by his attitude.

At first, it seemed as if the biped ignored her. Then, he weakly slapped the front of it and spoke.

"No, it's not alright..." He sighed in a calm manner, surprising those who have not yet heard him speak. Fluttershy jumped a little bit at the sound of his voice, but he paid no mind to it. He turned and faced Trixie, his sea-foam green eyes revealing his inner agony and fear. Trixie felt uncomfortable when she saw those eyes. Not in the "Creepy" sense, mind you, but in the sort of...awful churning feeling you get at the bottom of your heart when you walk into a hospital, or a funeral home. She wanted to-...No, it was her duty to try and help him in his time of need. She needed to-

"...My insurance doesn't cover this. It doesn't cover any of this!" Edgar shouted at his car. " *sigh* My dad is effin' gonna nuke me."

Trixie could do nothing but blink at what he said. When it felt appropriate, she took her hoof and placed it right on her face, shaking her head all the while. With that facehoof, all the previous feelings of sympathy suddenly went away.

***Edgar's POV***
**ten minutes prior.**

"...And that's how I defeated the White Bitch and saved the Starbuck tavern." I finished. It's been a while now, and we were just starting to come up to Ponyville. I was getting bored since Luna wasn't around and guard buddy was ignoring me. I know, I know I'm right next to fictional cream colored ponies and I should have loads to talk about. Well you'd be surprised. I know that I would creep her out if I started fanboying over her and her friends, so instead I decided that I would tell her a story. I shared something that happened in my past back in Minnesota, only I made it sound cooler. I know what you're thinking, and the answer is no. I already told it once, so I'm not going to tell it again. But hey, you're all a creative bunch who probably have a pretty good idea of what happened. I'll just leave it up to your imagination for now.

Applebloom looked at me, taking in everything I said.

"Ah don't get it. If she was that crazy, then why did ya go out with her in the first place?" She asked me.

"Cause humans get more silly the more they grow up." I told her, earning nothing but a blank stare. "... it's what I'm called. A Human."

"Ok, Mr "A hoo-man"." Applebloom said, completely butchering the pronunciation.

"Nooooo, my name's Edgar."

"But didn't ya just say it was "A hooman"." Applebloom asked with even more puzzled then she was before.

"That's like saying you are a pony, and I'm calling you "Ms. pony". My name is Edgar and I'm a human."

""Edgar and I'm a hooman"? That's a mouthful." She said with a sly smirk. "Can't ah just call ya "Edgar" for short?"

"...You're doing that on purpose, aren't you?" I asked, narrowing my eyes. She confirmed this when she gave a lively giggle and an innocently toothy grin.

God, it's a good thing she's adorable.

I was going to rebut with something, but I couldn't think of anything clever. It's a good thing that didn't really matter, because soon Applebloom changed the subject. Her ears perked up and her eyes widened as she pointed straight ahead.

"That's mah brother and sister." She said. Looking to where she was, I saw the Mane six grouped up in front of us, with Applejack standing next to her brother near an overturned cart. Twilight was at the front with Spike, Rarity and Fluttershy, eyeing us with a leery caution. I caught a glimpse of Trixie the rest of the girls grouped together, each doing what they would most likely have done. Rainbow was hovering over the group and, along with Applejack, glared at me. Trixie looked happy to see me, while Fluttershy hid backed up a little, due her fearful reflex. Finally, Pinkie was...waving at us without a care in the world.

Honestly, I should have been expecting that from her.

As we were pulled closer and closer to the group awaiting our arrival, I noticed some of the townsfolk were working on trying to clean up and salvage certain parts of the town. Some of the ponies picking through the rubble of what I assumed were their homes. Some looked almost completely untouched, saved for a broken window or two, while others looked an awful lot like they got zerg rushed. I could have sworn I saw a familiar brown earth pony foal with a propeller hat run out of one, carrying a little polka dotted bindle. Seeing Button Mash run out of the building caught me completely off guard because he was a fan made creation and was not canon. In the back of my mind I was worried that I would be seeing some other fan creations, but since there was a lack of alicorns with hideous coloration and cutiemarks, I relaxed a little.

I probably shouldn't be making jokes at their expense, since what they went through was traumatic, but back to what I was originally talking about.

The townsfolk were stopping what they were doing and gazed at us as we traveled on by, many doing double takes when they looked in my general direction. Checking my rear view mirror, I saw that many dropped what they were doing to follow us. Seeing the growing mass of ponies almost distracted me from what Applebloom was saying.

"- and there's Sweetie and Scoots and Cinnamon and Twist and featherweight-" She kept naming off names of the ponies she saw without a care in the world. -"and that's mah teacher, Cheerilee. They're all alright."

"Wha-Oh. Oh good for them." I said, snapping out of my trance and noticed that we were practically right in front of the Mane Six and Trixie. When we came to stop, Luna walked up to Twilight and started talking to her. After a couple minutes of talking, I saw Applejack step up between Luna and Twilight, and she looked uber-pissed. I tried to listen to what they were saying, but all I could really hear from any of them was muffled by the window. After a couple seconds, Applebloom started pawing (Or hooving) at the glass.

"Hey HEY! Take it easy there, Applebloom." I told her, scared that she was going to scratch the glass with her hard hooves. This car as been through enough already, I don't know what I would do If anything else was added to the list. "What do you want?"

"Could ya open your windows?" She asked me, nudging her head against the window.

Oh. Well duh.

I rolled up my window on Applebloom's side and then I started to hear their conversation much more clearly.

"-ere...is...Applebloom!" Applejack said in a tone that was very much unlike her. Well this just got interesting. Luna started talking again, but her voice got drowned out by Applebloom.

"We gotta let her know ah'm alright." She said to me.

"Well you can't do that if you're talking to me. Go on and let her know." I told her, before another thought came in my head. "And let her know I was the one who saved you...Twice." I added. I know that it might sound a little boastful, but if I know AJ's character, she'll feel indebted to me and not only will she give me a lifetime supply of the cider and Apple related products that the show boasts about, but this will give me and opportunity to hang out with her. I would finally get to hang with the cool kids. I could just see it now. I would be hanging with her brother and we would both say "Eeyep" a lot, Applebloom would want me to meet her friends and become a CMC, and I would eat all the Apple pie...ever.

Forgive me if I went off on another tangent, but I always did like Applejack's personality. It reminded me of "murican", without any of the negative stereotypes. Don't get me wrong though, she is far from my favorite character on the show. If anything, she is the last of the mane six I would want to change out with. Hell, there are some side characters I would rather hang out with, but aside from Trixie she is my best option to go "fanboy" over when everything is said and done.

"Applebloom, where are ya!?!" Applejack called out in a relieved tone, breaking me out of my little daydream.

"Ah'm in here, Applejack!" Applebloom yelled out my car window. "Ah want you take meet mah family. I know you'll get along with them." She told me.

"I can't wait." I smiled before looking back to the group. My smile faltered when I saw how quickly the demeanor of everyone, especially Applejack, changed.

"It ATE MAH SISTER!!!" ...What? "DON'T WORRY APPLEBLOOM! AH'LL GETCHA OUTTA THERE!!!" She said as she sprinted towards me with murderous intent.

"No no no No NO!!" I was saying out loud to myself as she closed the distance. When she got close enough she turned about-face, reared up on her front legs and bucked my car.

I felt a marinade of sensations immediately after, none of which were pleasant. I felt my body jolt from the impact, which amplified the soreness I still felt in my ribcage, and something very hard smack me in the face with the force of two angry freshmen. I heard sounds in the background, but they sounded like echos in the distance that were overlapped by the dull ringing noise that I was hearing, almost like what it would sound like when you got hit by a flashbang in Call of Duty. I couldn't breath for a couple seconds because I was being smothered in something that that felt like plastic cloth, but I didn't have to worry about that as the material started to recede a little.

As I groaned and tried to understand what the fuck just happened, I felt something shake my right leg. I looked over to find Applebloom look at me with a slight panic. She started talking, but it still came out pretty muffled. I didn't really catch anything she said, save for the last part.

"-m sooo sorry. Ah'm gonna go let 'em know you're friendly." She put her hooves on the edge of the window, before looking back at me. "Pleeeeese don't be mad at her." She pleaded before hopping out and scrambling to the group.

"Whaa?" Was the best response I could come up with at the moment. My head was pounding as I tried to grasp what happened. I looked straight ahead and Applebloom hugging Applejack in a group hug with Big Macintosh. Looking down a little, I notice my airbag was deflating over my wheel, as a small spot of red stained the white material. I also felt a warm liquid run down my nose, so putting two and two together, I concluded that the airbag thoroughly "rekt my shit." Looking back to the group of ponies ahead of me, I had but one thought left in my head.

That. Fucking. Cunt!

***Edgar's POV***
**present time**

"Let me at her! I'll turn her into glu-" I really wanted to finish what I was going to say, but a jolt of pain forced me to gasp and stumble. I would have fallen on my side if Luna didn't have cat-like reflexes. She leaned down and caught me with her side, and using the wing on the side I was on, she pulled me closer to her side and secured me tightly to her, making sure I couldn't injure myself or the hillbilly I was currently trying to murder. It almost felt like a living blanket was holding me against her.

"Thou had but one simple task, Edgar. Remain put and do not strain thy body, yet you failed to heed our words."

"But look at what she did!" I yelled back. She practically totalled it, save for the electronics. I was staking practically all my warrior "skills" and "abilities" on it, and now it's practically been rendered useless! I snorted a little just to keep the blood from running down my nose, but it also helped build the image of my pissed-off-ness. "She RUINED the body," I took one more glance to survey the damage. "And there's no telling what she did to the engine!"

To be honest, I don't know most of what I'm talking about. If the airbag was anything to go by, however, then there was no doubt that something was broken.

"Oh, you're just being a drama queen. It can't be that big of a deal. We fixed it last time, didn't we?" Trixie pipped up, annoyed at how I was reacting.

"We changed a tire and filled another with air. That's it. But this? This is way worse!!!"

"We are sure that whatever it is, it can be repaired." Luna took me and leaned me against the hood of the car. "But the words you spoke were uncalled for. Do you think that was an acceptable way to introduce yourself?"

"You're kidding me, right? You're not gonna get on her case about it?" I pointed out with raised eyebrows.

"We plan to. Both of you must learn to temper your emotions in the future, or you will make rash decisions you will come to regret." She scolded before looking back at Applejack, who pawed at the ground in a guilty manner. After switching the gaze between the two of us, a sly smirk adorned her face. She looked me dead in the eye and spoke again. "It seems as if you both got off on the wrong hoof. You two should start over and reintroduce yourselves." Oh, that's just not fair "Honest Applejack, would you step forth?" She asked as she beckoned her forth.

"Come on, Luna, that's just plain dirty." I told her, before getting a face full of feathers. She using my own words against me.

"Hush." She told me, watching as Applejack made her way over. "Now, whenever one of you two are ready."

"...Howdy. Ah'm Applejack. Sorry for bucking ya." She said as she looked away.

"Splendid work, Applejack." Luna praised before looking back to me. "It is your turn now."

"This feels stupid."

"Edgarrrr..."

"Alright alright. I'm Edgar... and I'm sorry for threatening to turn you into glue." No I'm not.

"Nicely done, now shake hooves you two." Luna commanded. Hesitantly, we both held our appendages out, and enjoy they connected, nothing happened. Applejack seemed to shudder a little when she felt my fingers enclose around her hoof, before giving three quick shakes and withdrawing it quickly.

"Huzzah, the ice has been shattered!" Princess Luna claimed. As Applejack trotted back towards the group, Princess Luna turned to face the wide-eyed gang. "As the rest of you may have heard, this is Edgar."

"He's certainly...interesting." Rarity said diplomatically. "And he's definitely no dragon."

"Anypony have an idea what he is?" Spike asked.

"He looks a lot like a chimpanzee." A guard somewhere in the back commented. hey now, you best check yourself.

"Nah, chimpanzees are stupid, and this one can talk. He's gotta be a Diamond dog." Another spoke. Hey! "or maybe he's a mixed breed. Maybe his mother was a diamond dog and his dad was a chimpanzee." The same Pegasus said with a look of "Eureka" flashing across his face. ...Did he just call my mom a bitch? HEY!!!

"Can it, Flash." Another unicorn said. "You don't wanna insult our guest, especially since we saw what he could do." He tried to say in a hushed tone.

Both Trixie and I rolled our eyes at the debate going on as to what I am until I felt something poke me on my thigh. It hurt a little, but not enough to really bother me. In fact, the touch was so light that I probably wouldn't have noticed it unless it hurt. "um, excuse me?" I looked over to see Fluttershy gazing up at me with them big ole' eyes, only to suddenly look down and hide them, turning toward my car. She came up to my hip like most of the other ponies, but she seemed to make herself smaller as she turned away. "I don't want to bother you so soon after Applejack cracked your shell... but can I ask what you are? You don't look like a turtle or a dragon, but if you're too shy to tell me, that's okay too. I sometimes feel that way too."

Hnnnnnng my heart! It grew three sizes today.

"I'm a human."

"Okay. Uh, thank you Mr. Human." She turned and walked away toward the pinkest pony in the parade. Fluttershy then suddenly cleared her throat, took a deep breath, and... whispered something into Pinkie's ear.

"EDGAR'S A HUMAN!?!?" Pinkie gasped out in surprise, jumping a few meters in the air...wow, look at that hang time. She's been there for a good four seconds before quickly looking left and right. She landed and shrugged her shoulders. "... what's a human?"

"Uh, hi. That'll be me." I simply stated, trying to nip all this conversation in the bud for now. "I don't wanna sound rude or anything, but couldn't we just deal with this later?"

Luna nodded in understanding.

"Indeed, for there is still much to be done for both you and Ponyville. But first, we should get you back into your car."

I tried to get up off the hood of my car, but my arms and legs felt tired. And by that, I mean REALLY tired. It hurt, but not as much as it should have been hurting. instead, I just felt very sluggish, and felt like I could topple over any minute. Thankfully, Princess Luna stopped me before I actually had to walk.

"Do you see the point I tried to make earlier?"

"Yea." I said, my pride hurt at not even being able to walk. "...Sorry"

"There's nothing to be ashamed of, for I've have seen stallions who have been through much less go though the same fatigue after a battle like yours." She spoke as she braced be against her once more and carried me back to my seat. "This time, stay in there until one of us comes to help you out of your seat."

"Battle?" Trixie asked mostly to herself.

Luna turned back with a confident smile.

"Indeed, for Edgar had not only single-handedly held his ground against the changeling army and their new queen, Telsona, He had done so with but a mere wooden sword!" She declares as she held up the splintered halves of my bokken, still stained with viscous green. The jaws of all the ponies within a twenty foot diameter and their ancestors dropped as their eyes almost bulged out of their sockets when they heard what said. "Yes, we could not believe it ourselves at first, but tis true!" There were many whispers and gasps among the audience, and words such as "Amazing" and "Powerful" were thrown around.

Oh Fiddlesticks.

It was probably a whimsical dream, but I was kinda hoping she would forget entirely about it that. At least until I can make up a story in my head about how I did it that was believable. Luckily, she decided to change to subject, so I still had time.

She turned towards Twilight. "I shall fly to the castle and oversee preparations and organization. While you escort Edgar back for medical attention, make absolutely sure that there are no others that require aid. " After she got one nod from Twilight, she turned to leave before noticing all the ponies that surrounded us. She looked at Twilight. "Before I leave, however, there is but one more thing I must do. Perhaps you may learn something from us yet." She turned back to the crowd who sought answers and guidance from the immortal diarch. Of course, this would be one hell of a time to hear music again... but this time the music was different. It was quiet and calming, like a lullaby. You almost couldn't notice it in the background.

"Citizens of Ponyville," She spoke in toned down Royal Canterlot Voice. It was much quieter then I was expecting. In fact, it was actually hard to hear her over the whispering of the crowd. "Thanks to our new friend, the changeling menace has been dealt with. Though he may seem foreign and strange, we hope that you treat him as you would an old friend, as well as anypony else who is in need of aid. For now, we urge you to return to your homes, should you be fortunate to have them, and extend generosity to those who weren't so fortunate to keep them. We will rebuild and endure, as we always have for our recorded history. For now, know that should any of you have any concerns, no matter how insignificant they may seem, you may find aid and solace at the castle. We only ask that you do not lose hope." Luna took to the air and started to fly off before a voice from the middle of the crowd stopped her.

"Mom, I can't hear her." A voice spoke from the back. Luna floated there for a moment before letting herself perch on the top of the school bell tower, her horn glowing a grossly incandescent blue. She narrowed her eyes at the crowd, trying to look for the voice who spoke.

"Whoever spoke just now, please come out." She said, trying to coax out the voice. I looked over to the crowd that began to split as three ponies became visible. The first was a large female earth pony with a beige coat, pigment blue mane with a rose pink streak. The pony I recognized as Bob Bon was being closely shadowed by two ponies, one of which was a pinto earth pony who was being held closely to her side, while another was grey unicorn filly. I recognized them as Dinky Hooves and Pipsqueak.

Like some of the other residents in this town today, Bon Bon looked shell shocked, shaking with puffy eyes as she held the two foals close to her. Her coat and hooves were stained with dried blood, while Dinky looked very sad as she comforted Pipsqueak, who had his head bandaged. It ironically looked like his pirate bandana from the Nightmare Night episode, only it was white with spots of red. His left ear was bandaged up in such a way that it looks like it would have muffled anything, while his right ear...

...I-it's gone. It's fucking gone.

When I realized what happened, I felt like crying like a bitch. Hell, I might just start.

Isn't it supposed to be against the rules for shit like this to happen to kids, let alone in a kids show? I looked back to Luna and saw that she wasn't doing so well either.

***Luna's POV***
**Third Person**

Luna had a hard time holding in her tears, as the light from her horn died down. When it comes to things like this it's never easy, but it was supposed to be so much easier then this. All she had to do was reassure the ponies , inspire them, do anything she could have done to make them feel safe, but then Pip just had to be one of the injured, didn't he? He was one of the first to openly appreciate her, even going as far as to say she was his favorite princess.

...And here he is now, a victim of a calamity that he had no control over.

Princess Luna wiped her eyes to get ride of any tears that might have formed and flew over to the trio. She landed a meter or two in front of them, and ignored the bows that the ponies surrounding her gave. While the ponies, including the still shaking Bon Bon and Dinky continued with their display of respect, Pip ran straight forward and hugged Luna's leg. There were also a couple flashes of light which startled her at first, but then she saw that they were reporters, so she ignored them for now.

"I knew you'd come to save us." He said, Trottingham brogue leaking through as he nuzzled her leg. She could feel a rough sensation where his right ear should have been.

"M-my only regret is that we couldn't arrive sooner." She stuttered, watching as she stood as still as possible so she didn't brush against his head to hard. "Careful, little Pip. You'll make your injuries worse." She warned, but to no avail. Ignoring everything she said, he kept on with the display of affection to the point where Luna actually had to step away to keep himself from hurting himself. Having nothing to support himself with, he fell but was caught by her magic before he hit the ground.

"It's so good to see you again." He laughed off, getting right back up on his hooves and trying again, forcing Luna to pick him up and keep him suspended in her magic.

"Pipsqueak, please! you must be more careful." She stated, trying to get her point across.

"Th-that's not going to work..." The earth pony mare spoke, her voice breaking. Luna looked back up to the pony with the candy wrapped Cutiemark. "His ears are covered in a lot of wrapping, so he can't really hear anything. Even if he could, the doctor who treated him put him under so much pain killer that he can hardly understand anything, either." Luna looked back at the colt, and though he was still suspended by her magic, he was still running in mid-air as he tried to get to her. She was right, he was barely lucid.

"Slow down, Princess! I can't keep up." He said, keeping at same pace the entire time. Luna just chalked it up to him being a young colt full of energy.

"It was the changelings, wasn't it?" She asked, only receiving a nod from Bon Bon.

"He wouldn't stop talking about how the changelings were gonna be sorry, and how you were going to "come to the rescue"." She said, before sniffling. "Two changelings took him away from me and... they bit it off. They ate my precious little colt's ear right in front of us and I couldn't stop them." She cried out, starting to break out in tears and collapsing into a sobbing mess. "I tried to stop the bleeding, they let me do that much, but there was so much blood, a-and he was screaming s-so much. He wouldn't stop screaming...I thought I was going to lose him." she barely uttered the last words as she dragged herself forward, to keep herself close to her son.

"Momma? Momma, why are you crying? Luna's here to save us now." He told her, oblivious to the situation or how heartbreaking it was to hear a colt like him sound so excited about life, especially since sooner or later, the medicine will wear off and he will remember exactly what he went through.

No words could describe a mother's tears, and soon her words reached the crowd that was watching so intently, and they too, along with the elements were starting to get emotional. This rose a red flag for Luna. As she tried to push away her thoughts of sadness, she listened in the background for anything. When she strained her ears, she could just barely make out the hum of a wind instrument.

Melody magic.

She knew now that she was letting herself get affected by it, and casted a quick protection spell on herself so it didn't affect her or her decision making like it did the crowd. She could still hear the music, and she definitely still felt downright awful, but it wasn't as before.

That's three times now that it happened in the last three hours that she had been there, four if you count the event that Twilight described before she got there. This couldn't be a coincidence, but she will have to mull this over another time. For now, she has to keep their spirits up.

"Sh sh sh," Luna hushed the worried mother. "Your foal is going to be alright. We are going to take him to the castle and make sure he is under the watch of our best medical staff." Luna said as she unstrapped the armor on her back. She then picked up Pipsqueak and placed him on her back and placed the armor back onto herself. The inside of her armor was actually pretty spacious and had cushioning pads on the inside to help absorb shock from any particularly nasty falls. Because the colt was so small, he actually fit pretty snugly inside, with his head poking out near hers. She got surprised when she felt the colt squeeze her back.

"Ha, I got youuu!" He sang in triumph. Luna gave a bittersweet smile at that, and turned to fly off, but was stopped when Bon Bon's voice rang out.

"No...no no, we have to be with him. I have to be with him, you can't just take him away from me!" She wailed.

"Which is why you are coming back to the castle with us. I am not as cruel as to separate a grieving mother from her foal." She said as she motioned for some solar guards to bring a carriage to her. "You shall be given accommodations and care while he is being treated. Do you have any other family, or herd mates here?"

"The only other three I have are in Canterlot right now." She said as the two pegasus guards helped her onto the carriage.

"Then when we are sure it will be safe, we shall be sure to spirit them to you posthaste." Luna assured as she watched the flyers get latched to the carriage. As they stretched their wings, Dinky spoke out.

"Be careful with my brother. He's scared of heights!"

"There is no need to worry, little one. He shall be sound asleep the entire trip." She said as her horn started to glow. She casted the spell onto Pipsqueak, and felt him start to relax his grip. "He shall be under momentarily, and resting safe in a hospital bed before the hour is up." And with that closing statement, she let the pegasi take off. She looked back down on her hooves and saw tiny specks of dried blood that was rubbed off on her.

Pipsqueak's blood, and it made her absolutely livid.

...How dare they?

How DARE THEY!!!

After the Wedding incident, our first instinct was to obliterate the Badlands. To kill every last one of their despicable race. Not only did they hunt our ponies, rounding them up like cattle, they left them to be terrorized with nightmares even weeks after the event. Nightmares for us to deal with. The only reason we haven't was because it was the wedding day of our niece. "This is supposed to be a day of peace and love." Our sister told us. "They learned their lesson." She said, and look at what has happened because of it. We treated all our foes as if they were as delicate as paper, and we always had to rise above them. We had the mercy to let them live, and this is how they repay us!?!?! By having the bucking audacity of butchering innocent mares, stallions, and foals in our own country?!? They are going to Burn for this! We are going to-

"Hey Princess?" A voice from right behind her asked. Luna momentarily stopped her seething to turn and face this voice. Pipsqueak was shifting around on her back, trying to make himself comfortable. It's obvious that the spell was going into effect, given his struggle to stay awake. He gave a full breathed yawn and spoke once more. "You're still going to come back and visit on Nightmare Night, right...?" He asked, his voice getting quieter and quieter as he started to drift off into his cozy little dreamland. He probably couldn't hear her, but that wouldn't stop her from answering him. Before he completely went to sleep, she lit up her horn and telepathically gave him a little message.

"I wouldn't dream of missing it." She told him. She could have sworn she saw his mouth twitch upwards into a smile, if only for a moment. She made sure to channel one more spell to ensure he had the best dream he has ever had so far. Maybe giving him a day at that new theme park, Wonderworld, will be enough.

Caring for Pip that was enough to quell her rage and give her a moment to think clearly. Those were incredibly dark thoughts she was having just a couple minutes ago, but they were entirely warranted. Action will have to be taken, and she will see to it that it will be. She turned back to the crowd and few reporters that was still watching, waiting for her next move. With that, she was reminded of what she was originally going to do.

Rally the ponies. Give them something to believe in.

Her horn began to glow once more, charging the same spell she cast earlier.Wiping her eyes and clearing her throat, she looked back to them with eyes that commanded silence and spoke in her Royal Canterlot Voice.

"This colt may not have been able to hear me due to what these monsters have done to him, nor could many of those in the back of the crowd. Well I would like you all to know that I could hear you. I can still hear all of you even now, I want you all to believe me when I say, these... these Savages... they will hear from us. They will hear from all of us very soon!" With that closing statement, she let loose the spell, letting its arcane resonance echo across the city. The ponies didn't seem to notice it, as they probably dismissed it as being part of the volley of bright camera flashes that erupted from the paparazzi and reporters after Luna finished her speech, but the effects were all the same as before. With some of her thestrals guarding her, she took off and flew to Twilight's castle, all the while hearing the roars and cheers of the citizens.

As for taking action, she would make sure that something was done. While she wanted to take action as soon as possible, she had her small charge to take care of first. He was the number one priority right now.

***Edgar's POV***
***First person***

"Holy shit..."

To say what happened just now was "intense" would be an understatement. She practically just pulled George Bush and said they were going to go to war, and she sounded like she meant it.

While the crowds were cheering, I saw Twilight motion to her guards. It almost looked like a "c'mere!" type of thing before she started walking.

"Come on, lets get Edgar into an infirmary and make sure his injuries are not too severe." I heard her say. I saw the guards ears twitch once, before they immediately stood at attention and started to march, following Twilight back to the castle. I felt the guards start to pull my car once more before coming to another stop. "Trixie, aren't you coming?" She asked. Shit, I almost forgot about her.

I looked back to Trixie. She looked as if she was deep in thought. She then looked back up at her and spoke.

"Spar-...Your majesty, would it be alright if I spoke with Edgar?" She asked as she looked at me though my driver side mirror in a neutral tone that quite honestly scared the bejesus out of me. "...Alone?" And that scared me more.

Please say no, please say no, please say no.

"Oh course you could. You were worried quite a lot for your friend, after all." She said in a cheerful and oblivious tone.

This is why we can't have nice things.

Trixie trotted up to the passenger door and looked right at me through the open window. I saw her horn light up for a couple seconds before it dimmed out. Rolling her eyes, she looked back at me and knocked on the door. I scooted as far to the right as I could and pulled the handle on my passenger door so that she could pull it open. She did exactly that, pulling it closed with her tail on the way in and plopping her rump down and staring at me. The guards started to pull us when she got situated and we were on our way to the castle.

After a few seconds, Trixie scooted towards me and looked me over. Soon, her brows started to furrow and she spoke suddenly.

"What in tartarus were you thinking!!!" She yelled at me as she pushed me with her forehead.

"Owowow! Uh, Trixie?" I tried to interrupted.

"What?!?" She yelled, her voice getting louder. Gulping, I pointed behind her. She turned to look, and saw that the window was still down, and anyone within listening distance was looking at her with raised eyebrows and wide eyes. In the awkward silence, you could almost hear crickets chirping. Soon, her mean look turn turned into an obviously forced smile. After giving some equally forced laughs, she nudged in my direction. "Edgar, lowes-kay the indo-way, por favor."

"...What?"

"Close the dam- gosh darn window, pretty please with a cherry on top." She said through her teeth in a honeyed voice, trying to sound as friendly as possible as her eyes darted between the ponies looking at her and the car door. I turned my keys to turn the electronics of my car back on, and rolled up my windows. As soon as the windows closed, she looked back to me and let her forced smile turn into incredibly natural barred teeth. "Now, THE BUCK WERE YOU THINKING?!?" She yelled once more as she raised her hoof menacingly, causing me to flinch. She kept her hoof raised as she looked over my body, before letting it drop. "Damn it, you have so many bruises, there's nowhere I can smack you. What is wrong with you?"

"What is wrong with you?!? Where the hell did all this come from?" I asked incredulously.

"Oh, like you don't know!" She accused, like she expected me to know.

"I don't! I really don't!"

"Oh, well let me remind you then!" She said as she used her tail to whip my middle finger, which was currently resting on my armrest.

"Oowwwie!" I yelled as I put my finger in my mouth, nursing my boo-boo as if it were a grievous battle wound. Looks like she found a spot.

"You were supposed to stay safe. You bucking promised me you would stay safe, and what did you do? You put yourself right in the middle of a changeling army! Where is your common sense? Did you leave it in the Everfree?"

"What the hell was I supposed to do, Trixie? Just sit there and watch her burn Applebloom alive?" I fired back, letting my voice get more and more aggressive. That seemed throw her off guard.

"Yes, wait. N-no... look, I don't know, alright? So just shut up. You're being stupid!" She said. "Stuuupid!"

"Nuh-uh."

"Yea-huh"

"Nuh-uh"

***meanwhile, outside the car***

Everypony, including both the Elements of Harmony and the guards walking near the car, felt very uncomfortable as the muffled yelling continued from inside the rocking car. They couldn't really tell what was going on because of how tinted the windows were, but whatever it was, it wasn't pretty.

"...So is nopony going to talk about what is going on in there?" Rainbow Dash asked, rubbing the upper portion of her foreleg nervously as she looked away from the black carriage Trixie and the Hoo-man were riding in.

"Maybe it's angry sex?" The orange Pegasus offered, earning a very grossed out look from Rarity and a strong blush from Fluttershy.

"You may want to keep those perverted thoughts to yourself." Rarity reprimanded with an upturned nose.

"...What? We were all thinking it, I just said it." Flash justified. "With a get-up like that, she has to be into some pretty kinky stuff, and she probably thought that he was really hurt. Think of it like "FOMO" or something. Trying to get it before he has to fight off another invasion."

"Can it, Flash." The unicorn known as Flash Bang hushed. What he wouldn't give to slap the shit out of his partner, just a little. He did not sign up for the marine division of the royal guards to deal with his shenanigans.

"You're just upset because I'm the good-looking Flash."

Applejack shook her head at their antics.

"They're like two peas in a pod." Applejack sighed.

"Eeyup." Big Mac agreed, being as he walk on his three good legs.

"Wait, do you mean the ponies in that tin can right there, or us?" Flash Sentry asked.

"...Eeyup."

"Come on, bet anypony five bits that they're buckin right now." Flash Sentry challenged.

"GROSS dude." Rainbow Dash now had the largest blush on her face hiding behind her hooves as she flew at MACH-half toward Twilight's castle.

"Alright Flash, I'll take that bet..."

Everypony in the caravan's earshot turned towards the voice, belonging to a female thestral guard walking alongside them. She did not have many distinguishing features due to the armor she was wearing. The only one of note was her cinnabar eyes, which almost seemed to glow in the daylight.

***Edgar's POV, back at the car***

"...And the worst part is that you lied to me. You lied about staying safe and you lied about being normal." Trixie reprimanded, almost out of breath because of how much we have been yelling at each other. "You told me you were just a student, not some beefy super soldier."

"Alright, hold the phone," I said to her. "I am not a soldier."

"Oh really, then how is it that you took on army and a Queen with just that wooden stick?" She interrogated.

"Well, that's the thing... I didn't." I revealed. Trixie did nothing but stare at me for a good two minutes before she spoke once more.

"W-what do you mean you didn't?" She stuttered.

"I mean I didn't..." seeing that she obviously wasn't going to settle for that (not that I blame her), I continued with what I was going to say. "Remember when I kept saying I was hearing music, and you kept saying I was crazy?" Trixie nodded. "Well, it happened again when I was in front of all those changelings. I played a song from my radio to distract them while Applebloom ran off. I thought they were going to kill me, but they, along with the entire town, just started dancing out of nowhere. I don't think they even knew what was going on, and neither did I." In the middle of my explanation, Trixie look like she had an epiphany.

"Wait a minute. The Melody magic, me dancing, the music that started to play outside the barrier, that was you???" She asked, earning a nod and a blank look from me.

"Whatever you were just talking about, I'm pretty sure that was my fault." I admitted. "Anyway, I think the music from my car's speakers made them all hypnotized and stuff. So I lead them out of town like a parade and then...well, did the same thing I did with the dragon."

"You scared them off?" She asked. When I shook my head, she seemed confused at first. When she realized what I meant, the interior of my car took a very grim atmosphere. "Oh..." I shook my head to try and change the subject.

"Look, the point is, I used the music to beat them back. It didn't take serious skill or anything like that. It was just dumb luck."

"Well, Luna said you fought with the Queen. How are you still alive after that?"

"Dumb luck. She ended up talking a lot more then actually doing anything else." Among other things. Trixie looked like she knew I was not sharing everything, but thanks to some more dumb luck, she didn't pry into that. I was secretly grateful for that, since It made me uncomfortable just thinking about it. "I was able to keep her distracted long enough to stab her eye. She would have probably killed me if Luna hadn't shown up."

Trixie exhaled a lungs worth of air in a sigh as she shook her head.

"This is just perfect, you just flat out lied to two princesses of equestria and the entire town. And if word gets out, the entire country!" She let her head drop with a thud and she restes her forehead on the dashboard as she asked the next question. "Uggg, why did you have to lie to them? Why are you being so dumb?"

"Because now I feel fantastic!" I yelled. She turned her head towards me to pay attention to what I was saying, still letting it lay on the dashboard. "Back home, I was an average joe, if not less. Sure I could act, sure I could do some martial arts. I could sing, dance, hell I could make cupcakes. But on my world, all that meant diddly-squat. There was a tiny chance, if any, that I might be special and make something of my talents, but the chances of having a happy ending over there were practically nonexistent. If I stayed over there, I would probably be stuck working at a McDonalds or an Office depot for the rest of my life. Now look at me, Trixie. I fought a dragon, I just liberated a town, and just little over an hour ago I was rubbing elbows with Princess Luna. I'm a hero and I'm going to be loved for it, and that's just from two days of being here. Two Days. You can't just tell me that isn't the tightest shit ever." I let out a sigh... if I never came here, I really was going to be no one special, wasn't I?

It hurt to admit it, but it was true. The only way I could have had anything decent was if I went to college for a couple years, but that needed money. Money that I would probably never would have had. I turned back to Trixie and spoke once more trying to not only cement the idea I was trying to convey, but to stop my voice from breaking.

"Back home, I watched the show and watched your episodes in particular. Heck, I still remember what you said when the dragon was trying to eat us. You know what it feels like, right? To want feel great? To want feel important?" Trixie turned her head away from me and lowered her pointy hat with her hooves so it could cover her face. I knew that she understood what I was feeling all too well.

"Y̦͇̕o̷̹̦̺̼̖u are ̼̹̼̹͞͞s̝̳̝͓̹͙o̷ much m̨̥͈̻o̖͔r̝͓͞e̮̲̜̥̲̭͠ than ̨̞̲͎̲̥t̪̙͚̰̳̘̬ḫ̥̩̕ą̗̦ţ̝̗̮͔..."

"You are so much more than that." Trixie spoke in a soft tone. "I don't care how bad you make your world sound, it's different in Equestria. You risked your life to save an entire town, and that alone proves you are a wonderful stallion." She comforted lightly, as if speaking any louder would break me. "You're right when you said I should know how you feel. I do, but you're lying to yourself and everypony around you just like I did, and that's not right." She turned back to me and pressed her head into my side, careful to mind the horn and my injuries. "If you just come out clean and tell the whole truth to them, I know they would still accept you and treat you like you were one of us. I just did it today, and everything I done was water under the bridge to them."

I mulled over what she said. Even after all l the things that had happened, this was still as close as Equestria gets to the real thing. I could come clean right now and they probably wouldn't treat me that much differently, since I still pretty much saved the town. Still, It feels nice to pretend I'm more.

"Could you give me a little while? I'll come clean, just not right now." I pleaded. Trixie made me wait a full minute before she responded.

"I still don't agree with it, but alright," She then looked up at me with smile and pointed a hoof at me. "But you have to promise me that you will tell them the truth. Not just any promise, but a Pinkie promise."

"How do you know what that is?" I asked her.

"She wouldn't stop talking while we were waiting for you." She told me. After looking at me expectantly for a little, I did what she wanted.

"Cross my heart, hope to fly... am I really going to have to do the last part?"

"Edgaaar...."

"Alright, alright already. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." I finalized the sacred pact by balling up my left fist and pressing it against my eye. Trixie let out a sigh of relief right after.

"Thanks Edgar."

"No problem, I guess." I looked out the window to get our bearings. We were practically half a football field away at this point, so we were probably going to be at the gates in less then a couple minutes. "By the way, you put in a good word for me with Twilight, right? I kinda wanna meet her and her friends."

"Oh, that reminds me." A crack went out as she whipped her tail and hit me again.

"AAhh. Why the same finger, WHY???"

"How long did you know Twilight was a Princess? And why didn't you tell me?" She said with scrunched eyebrows.

"How could you not know? You live here! What, have you been living under a rock?"

Here we go again.

"Oh, I'm sorry. The Everfree mailmare must have taken one too many days off!" She said sarcastically, moving her hooves in pseudo air quotes.

We just sat there glaring at each other for a couple seconds before one of us started to chuckle. I couldn't tell who did it first, but soon we both started laughing. After coming down from our high, I spoke once more.

"But seriously, did you really have to hit the same finger? That really stung." I said, still noticing a pulsing sensation.

"Heh heh, sorry about that. I get caught up in the heat of the moment sometimes." She said as she looked at me with a sheepish smile.

"Mmm still hurts." I mumbled, looking back outside. We were practically thirty meters away from it at this poi- what is she doing with my hand?

I look back at Trixie and saw that she had my hand in both hooves, staring at my middle finger.

"Trixie has been such a bad pony, punishing you like that. Let her kiss that boo-boo better." She said in baby talk, putting her mouth around my middle finger.

My mouth stopped working as eyes practically blurted out of their sockets when I saw what she did. She sucked on my finger, massaging it with her tongue as it swirled around the digit. She then closed her eyes and gave a gentle hum, sending vibrations through my hand as the slowly pulled her mouth off my finger, letting it leave the warm confines of her mouth and letting the cool air embrace the glistening digit.

"Feel better now?" She asked in a fake innocent tone.

To be honest, it kinda did feel better, but the way she did it caught me completely off guard. I wanted to say something along the lines of "While I appreciate the gesture and good will you meant, I do not appreciate the methods you used or the fact that you didn't even ask", but my brain was pretty much scrambled from what she just pulled.

"A-a buja..." Brain.exe has stopped working.

Trixie just started laughing at my face.

"Hahaha oh Celestia, your face. It's beet red!" She laughed at my expense, banging her hoof on the fabric of her seat.

"Y-you did that on purpose!"

"Oh, that was hilarious. Goddess, you are so easy." She said, still recovering from her fits of laughter, falling backwards with her head resting on my lap.

Well that wasn't very nice at all.

I was about to come up with a witty retort, maybe looping back to something about horns, but I heard a tapping on the glass. I turned around and saw the bat pony I was talking to earlier. It looked like she was trying to peer into my window, but couldn't really see all that well because of the tint. I opened my car door.

"Yes?" I asked the scarlet-eyed mare.

"Princess Twilight made a request to walk fro-" she stopped talking when she looked at me as her eyes widened. She looked at me , then Trixie, then back to me again before she started to gain a mirthful smile before giving a whistle. "Looks like I actually owe Flash five bits."

I was confused at first, before I realized what she was implying.

"Nothing happened. Nothing suspicious happened at all." I said, trying to convince her.

"You're blushing, your claw-thingy is wet, and we kept hearing your carriage rock the entire way here. Sure seems like a whole lot of nothing was going on." She joked at my expense. "A whole lot of kinky nothing. Bee-Tee-Dubs, You're pitchin' a tent." She chimed. I look down, and sure enough I had something down there. It wasn't quite boner level, but boy it was getting there.

I looked back to Trixie and saw that as she turned her head, her cheek poked the tent in my jeans before she scrambled away from it toward her side of the car. She looked just as mortified as I was, looking back and forth between me and my ever-more humiliating little friend. She looked at me and mouthed the word "sorry" at me, in a slightly guilty manner. I say slightly only because after she looked away from me, I saw the slightest smile on the corner of her mouth. She obviously found this more funny then I did.

I gave a quick punch to my thigh in attempts to stop myself from reaching full mast, and it started to work. After a small giggle from the Thestral guard, she spoke again.

"Anyway, Princess Twilight has asked that we walked to the infirmary from here, and that you leave the carriage outside. We are willing to carry you if you need to be." She said, transitioning from lecherous jokes to professional demeanor in a heartbeat.

"Why do I have to leave it outside?" I asked.

"It's heavy, and there's stairs."

I kinda didn't want to leave it outside, but I guess I could lock it. I would know if someone was in my car anyway if I put my alarm on. I took out my keys and shifted my legs to get out, only to get stopped by the soreness of my muscles.

That's gonna get old very quickly.

"Alright.... uh, could you guys help me out?" I asked.

The bat pony whistled over to another guard, and she came over to help me out. I noticed there seemed to be quiet a lot of female guards, as well as female everything. They both grabbed onto my arms and pulled me out. My feet were still in the car, so I would have fallen on my face if they both didn't catch me. They did this synchronized kneel-thing so I fell onto their backs. It was actually kind of impressive. They then pulled me out and started to trot towards a stretcher laid on ground, and carefully laid me down on it. They both then picked up the stretcher and started to march towards the door.

I turned my head to make sure Trixie got out before locking it. Trixie walked out the driver side and kicked it shut with one of her back hooves before trotting back to me. I locked the car, startling some of the other ponies before they relaxed, and let myself get carried past the front gate towards the mane six, Trixie close to my side.

From here, it looks like smooth sailing to get myself bandaged and all that bullshit. What could go wrong?

***Ten minutes later.***

"WHAT THE BUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU WON'T TREAT HIM?" Trixie yelled at the doctor.

From now on, I'm just not going to say anything.

Author's Note

Now that we got that out of the way, it's time to see which author has the most pov changes in one chapter.

But seriously, there is no excuse for having you guys wait this long for this chapter. Their have been some family stuff going on along with some work stuff, but I still shouldn't have taken that long, and for that, I apologize to you all.

I will try to be much more better with my updates, but if that happens, you should probably expect some shorter chapters.

again, special thanks to those that have stuck with me and shown their support (like Sarachi, portal82, little khan, and knightofstories.)

but above all, thank caribou coffee and five hour energy.

One last note, this chapter is unedited, so if there are any mistakes you see, that is probably why. I was on turbo-write mode the entire two months.

Chapter Eight: Dark side of the Moon
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Eight: Dark side of the Moon

(A.K.A Chapter Eight: The amount of introductions is too damn high!)

"I never learn anything talking. I only learn things when I ask questions."

-Lou Holtz

***Third Person POV***

"WHAT THE BUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU WON'T TREAT HIM?" Trixie yelled at the doctor. The doctor was used to this sort of thing because of how long he has been in his field, and proceeded to wipe the fog of Trixie's breath off his glasses without even missing a beat. "He just saved the lives of everypony in this town, and this is how your going to treat him?"

After the Mane Six got walked into the castle, Applejack went on ahead with Big Macintosh and Applebloom to not only get checkups, but to check on Granny Smith and make sure everypony was doing alright. Twilight asked Rarity to go on ahead with Spike and Sweetie Belle to get settled in their rooms and make themselves at home, and to spread the message to everypony else still in the castle. It was going to be a tight squeeze for the ponies as they would have to make makeshift sleeping quarters and a soup kitchen out in the main hall and the courtyard, but it was much better then sending the ones who were made homeless back into their destroyed homes. The town was practically in shambles, and while they have some construction ponies working on the infrastructure of the town, it was going to take some time for the contractors from New Yolk City to arrive and get everything repaired back to normal. Rainbow Dash, on the other hoof, volunteered herself to go on patrol with the Pegasi and make sure the town was going to be safe.

"It's supposed to be "You're", Trixie." Pinkie corrected, earning a confused look from everypony, Trixie included. "What? It's proper grammar."

When everypony else started to shake their heads, Trixie knew that it was her just being "Pinkie" and did the same, ignoring her and focusing on the issue at hoof.

"That's not what I'm saying. Your a doctor-"

"You're." She interrupted yet again.

"-a doctor. It's your duty to heal the sick and injured ponies." Trixie paused, waiting for the Pink Menace to interrupt. When nothing came out of her mouth, she assumed it was safe and continued. "You can't just say no to him, not after what he went through!"

"Could I just say something?" Edgar asked from his stretcher.

"Mind your own business Edgar, I'm trying to get you some medical attention." She said, causing Edgar to roll his eyes.

"Look, even if I could I wouldn't. I'll be frank, I haven't seen anything quite like him before. I don't have any idea where to start if I was to treat him, and that's not counting any of the possible dangers he might put the already injured ponies in."

"LIKE WHAT?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe an unknown pathogen we have never encountered. His common cold could be our Ebon pestilence. Biology aside, that's not even mentioning what seeing him could do to the already shell-shocked ponies in the I.C.U." The brown earthpony doctor shook his head apologetically. "I'm sorry miss, but there is simply nothing I could do to help to help right now. Not without putting either species at risk."

Trixie looked at Twilight, pleading for some sort of royal intervention. Unfortunately, it didn't seem like it was going to happen. She couldn't just force the doctor to do a checkup on Edgar.

"He does have a point, Trixie." Twilight said. "The needs of the many do outweigh the needs of the few or the one. We have to be absolutely sure he won't inadvertently harm anypony."

Trixie stomped a hoof on the ground and exhaled furiously through her nose. It was just so frustrating for her considering every time she tried to do something these past couple of years it backfired-no, Exploded in her face. Why couldn't she have things go her way for once. Why couldn't things ever be simple.

Twilight, sensing her distress, placed a reassuring hoof on Trixie's shoulder in attempt to cheer her up.

"Don't worry, we'll figure something out for Edgar. For now he can use the softest, most comfy bed in the castle." She promised, calming Trixie a considerable amount. She let her thoughts drift off when it looked like a fight was not going to break out.

Just what was she going to do about this? Sure, she was excited about learning more about this new species, but Dr. Stable's professional opinion still held a weight in her mind. She didn't worry about infection all that much, because she knew the basics of sanitation. Cast a quick protection spell here, sterilize equipment there. In summary, she just had to think before she acted and she wouldn't be in any danger. On the off chance that she did get infected by whatever he might have had, how else could she be expected to lead if she fell under illness, let alone a severe one? It would demoralize the already devastated town. Adding to that, she doesn't know anything about his bodily functions or his physical nature. If she was to try and figure out more about him, she might end up doing more harm than good, But on the other hoof she couldn't let the pony who cleaned up the mess she was responsible for NOT have any aid.

"You could try for a veterinarian." The doctor said, oblivious to the implications of his comment.

"Excuse me?" Trixie pressed, hoping he had a good explanation.

"You know, an animal care specialist. Possibly one that specializes in monkeys, and doesn't mind getting their hooves dirty." He said, wiping his glasses one more time before turning toward Twilight. "It really is the best option, what with the sanitation issues and the house training and the feeding and the-uhhhhhh why is the pony in the pointy hat staring at me like that?" He asked as he looked back to Trixie, his voice going into a higher pitch then before when he saw her.

Trixie did nothing but glare at him for a couple seconds. "Glare" being the most gentle way of putting it. You could almost hear her rage boil, and quite literally see steam slowly leaking through her nostrils.

The doctor readjusted the collar of his coat and gulped.

"Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me." He chuckled nervously before looking back at Trixie. "No seriously, make her stop."

.....

***Edgar's POV***
**Castle corridor**
*Ten minutes later.*

"...We need to work on your people skills, Trixie." I told her, watching the halls pass by as the guards carried me from the stretcher to the room Twilight offered me.

Me, along with Trixie, Twilight, Pinkie, and Fluttershy were walking making our way to the room as.

"Oh, come on! You heard what he said. He practically called you an animal." She tried to defend.

"You still can't justify hitting a guy with glasses. Besides, what he said made pretty good sense." I emphasized. If you think about it, we are all animals in one way or another. The doctor was just a specialist for ponies. A veterinarian checks up on animals all the time, and is pretty much a generalist when it comes to many different animals. "It's not like I need a triple-bypass surgery or a heart transplant. A veterinarian would be a perfect substitute for a doctor."

"Where would we even find a veterinarian in this town?" Trixie asked. I gave a sly smile, knowing exactly who would be perfect for this job. I couldn't just ask her outright, since she would question how I knew she was one, but I had an idea.

"It would be a real shame if I, a sentient being and new found animal species, were to suddenly be in more pain." I gave a fake and weak cough right after I finished that, only to end up coughing in real pain because of the fake cough. Go figure."Oh no, pain! This is the worst! THE WORRRST!" I rasped out in a scratchy voice. Wish I had a glass of water right about now.

"...What was the point of that?" Trixie asked.

Wait for it.

"Can't talk, in pain. Ouch, look at all this pain." I continued to rasp.

Waaaait for it.

Soon, Fluttershy trotted up to me and looked me over, poking at the fabric of the jeans on my legs. It hurt a little bit, but as if she read my mind, she lightened her touch to the point where I could barely feel her.

"um, I'm not a doctor or anything like that, but if you want I can take a look at you and make sure you aren't hurt too badly." Fluttershy offered, both her pokes and her vision trailing upward until her hoof stopped at my neck and her eyes met mine.

Dawwwwwwwwww... they're so big and blue.

The gaze was soon broken when Fluttershy blushed and hid herself behind her mane.

"That is, if you wouldn't be too uncomfortable." She quickly added.

"If you are going to help me, then I definitely wouldn't mind at all." I told her her, relieved that that actually worked. "Thank you for your kindness, I was scared nobody would help me."

Suddenly gaining more courage and morale, Fluttershy straightened her posture and spoke in a noticeably louder voice. It was still quiet, but you didn't have to strain your ears to hear her.

"You're very welcome." Fluttershy turned over to Twilight and addressed her. "Twilight, ummm, is it alright if borrow a few things from you?"

"You don't have to ask that, but are you okay with helping him?" She asked, worried for the safety of her friend.

"Nopony else is offering to help him, so I have to. I'm just need a book and some bandages, and maybe some food for him for later." She clarified. After receiving a nod from Twilight, she went off to grab the things she needed for me.

We walked in silence for a couple more minutes until we turned left and saw... another long-ass hallway.

Jesus Christ, this castle can't be that big.

I was starting to lose patience because since I was face up on the stretcher, I saw nothing but ceiling the entire time. Until we stopped on the third door to the left of the hallway.

"Here we are." Twilight said, using her magic to open the stone door. The room itself was very large but seemed a little spartan. There was a coffee table and a baby blue couch in the middle, along with a queen sized bed and a Cherry-colored wooden nightstand on either side of it against the wall, which was made of what looked like smooth granite tiles. As we went inside, I heard what sounded like a wind chime that rang as we kept advancing in the room. They were loud enough to be noticed, but quiet enough to not get annoying any time soon. In fact, I almost didn't notice the chimes since the hoof-steps of the other ponies were close to drowning them out. As I was being carried inside by the guards, I noticed a fairly large window on the far right side of the bed, which let out a gentle ray of sunlight beaming through. "Be as gentle as possible when setting him on the bed." Twilight instructed.

The guards aligned themselves longways with the bed, and then proceeded to tip me onto the bed. Not wanting to fight gravity, I rolled myself like a tired teenager onto the bed and, used the momentum to roll a little more so that I was laying on my back.

"Comfortable?" The still unnamed bat pony asked me, tracing her eyes up and down my body.

Well, I've been better.

"I guess. Could I have a glass of water?" I asked.

"Ditto." Trixie said.

"I'll have a servant bring us some refreshments." Twilight said as she turned to one of the guards. "Continue with your normal rounds for now, and await further orders." The guards stared at her unmoving for a couple seconds until Twilight bopped herself on the head. "Oh, duh! One second, I have to remember what I scheduled today's pass code to be." She said as she thought for a moment, before looking at the guards, clearing her throat, and saying a word really fast. "..."Hippopotomonstrosesquippediliophobia"."

"Di-did you just have a seizure?" Trixie asked the Alicorn, mirroring both my expression and that of the guards.

Twilight shook her head.

"It's a code word. Anytime a situation changeling related occurs, ponies of high rank must use these to give orders. Otherwise, they could just try and impersonate us and make our forces do something stupid." she explained.

Of course Twilight would pick something as random as that.

"It's the scientific term for "fear of long words"." I informed Trixie. Soon everyone looked at me moderately surprised. "...what?"

"I'm sorry, you just caught me off guard. It just seems like a random thing for you to know." Twilight told me.

"Eh, internet." I bluntly said, earning confused looks from all but Trixie.

"Seems like only a sadistic psychologist would concoct a word like that to describe the fear of such long words. Why couldn't it just be “Longwordaphopia"? "Trixie commented.

Anyway, that seemed good enough for the guards, so they made their way out of the room after she told them to send for refreshments. As the were walking out, the floor caught my eye. It had a polished azure rock-crystal thing going on, but the most interesting things were the tiles themselves. Each one had a different color symbol glowing on it. Every step the guard took to exit the room, another chime rang out as the tiles they stepped on glowed a little brighter each time.

So that's what that was.

The guards shut the door behind them, leaving me alone with Trixie, Twilight and Pink-Alright, where the hell did she go? I was so excited for quality time with the unofficial princess of parties.

"Where did Pinkie go?"

"I don't really know." Twilight said, scratching her head. She shook herself out of her thoughts though and waved it off. " It's best not to think about it. I'm sure that she'll turn up eventually." She assured as she trotted over to my bedside. While she was walking over here, her horn glowed as she picked up the blue couch and moved it closer to the bed, facing me still smiling. Trixie had hopped on the bed already and was laying perpendicular to my feet, facing Twilight. We were stuck staring at each other in a what I would describe as a happy Mexican standoff until Twilight spoke once again. "~Soooooooooo..."

"So what?" Trixie asked her. Twilight kept smiling at us, before scooting her couch closer to the bed.

"Well, you both just shown up abruptly to save us. One of you being a pony I haven't seen in a very long time," She told Trixie, before looking in my direction. "And another, and entirely new and rare creature that I have never seen before." As she was talking, her horn started to glow and soon a paper and quill started to appear in my peripheral vision while her smile continued to get bigger. "~Sooooo, I've been meaning to ask...~"

I felt like sighing right at that moment.

I've read enough fanfiction to know where this is going.

Like all the other times before, I started to hear music again, but I've been hearing it so often, I stopped questioning it.

"Could I ask you some questions? I wanna know All about you. Like where you're from? What is the sequence of your genome? Can humans see in colors, or are they colorblind?" She hopped off her couch and stuck her muzzle really close to my hands. "And what do you call these things? Do they grow into claws? And where is your tail?" She actually bumped into my hands while she was continuing with her questions and the items she was levitating lost their aura and started to drop. Luckily, she caught them again almost immediately after she lost control. "And were you born immune to magic, or do you have a special trick to make yourself immune? Are you immune to all magics?" Unluckily, this just gave her more questions to fire off.

"Twi- well you see- could you let me fin-" I kept trying to answer her questions, but every time I tried to start a sentence, she cut me off with another confounded question. I looked over to Trixie, who was eying her warily for some obscure reason. She started to walk around the bed now, talking all the while. For some some strange reason, when she walked I couldn't hear any chimes.

"And what was that thing you were riding around in? It's not a creature, right? No, no, it must be some advanced form of technology we haven't seen before, like a compact train." Twilight stopped right in her tracks, and gasped in a sort of "Eureka!" fashion that would have made Einstein proud. In a single bound, she flapped her wings and landed right above me, and got right up in my face. For a moment, all I could see were her huge eyes. "OH MY GOSH, Did you bring any more technology with you?" she asked me, wagging her tail almost like an excited puppy.

Okay, she got way too close for comfort hella quick, though she seemed to not realize it. I felt my face start to heat up, and looked over to Trixie to see if she was going to say anything to try and get her off me. She looked pretty angry, her eyes narrowing as if she was trying to stare down the back of Twilight's head. It's not like I would blame her. I mean, I know Twilight is probably ecstatic by now, but I would be a little irritated if she ignored someone else's personal space too. We both heard a throat clear, and like a record player scratching to a halt the music stopped. Twilight turned her head as I tilted mine to look over at where it came from. Fluttershy was in the doorway, carrying a bag with a red cross on either side of her, a tray of fruit on one wing, a tray with glasses of a clear-ish yellow liquid on another, and a dictionary sized book on the top of her head.

She'd get a 10/10 if I was a talent show judge.

"Twilight, coul-Whooao, could get off him please?" She asked, almost losing balance of all the things she was trying to bring In. She didn't even bother looking at Twilight, and instead focused her vision almost entirely on the book that was precariously placed on her head. "I can't help him while you are on top of him like that."

Twilight slowly looked back at me and looked all around the bed. Seeing the position she was in, she quickly flapped her wings and scrambled off me, landing on the couch. Clearing her throat, she talked once again.

"Soooooo...Hey Fluttershy, need any help with that?" She asked almost too quickly. Probably to change the subject.

"Oh, take your time, Twilight." Fluttershy said while inching toward my bed. If it were anypony else, I would have thought that was sarcasm, but it is really hard to tell with the way Fluttershy is.

Twilight used her magic to take the trays and book off of her, relieving her workload by a great deal. Fluttershy, free of her burden, moved over here a lot quicker. Again, I heard no chimes from the floor.

"I'm sorry I took so long." She apologized, dropping her saddlebags off at the foot of my bed. "I had a hard time trying to balance the fruit and the lemonade."

"Fluttershy, I really appreciate it, but you didn't have to get them for us. I already sent for a servant to grab us some. " Twilight told her.

"Oh, I know. I ran into her as I was coming back. She was a nice mare." She commented. "She was on her way here, but another pony asked directions to the infirmary. So I told her that I would take the trays while she took them there." She explained as she took out the many objects from the bags she brought. Things like a bottle of who knows what, bandaids with smiley faces on them, rolls of actual bandages, hoof sanitizer, a box, a sewing kit and... a rubber ducky. Fluttershy, looking just as surprised as me, threw the rubber ducky somewhere into the bathroom, which made a satisfying squeaky noise when it landed. "I don't know where that came from, but let's just forget that happened." She said, making me start to doubt her medicinal expertise.

"Uhhh, this a little excessive, don'tcha think?" I commented while staring at the condom thing she was wrapping over her hoof. I started to get a little scared until I realized they didn't have normal gloves. I took a sip of the lemonade that was on the counter, which wasn't too bad. It wasn't godly like you would expect after so many fanfictions gave praise to the food and water in Equestria. It was cold, lemony, and ade-y, that's about it.

"I don't know if you're seriously hurt or no, so I came prepared." She said as she took a cotton swab in her mouth and dipped it in the bottle, then walked in front of the couch Twilight was sitting on.. "Thiph migh thting a wittle." She said as she leaned her head forward and pressed it against the tip of the cut on my nose.

"Ow ow ow ow ow!" I grimaced.

After she was done brutally wiping my nose clean, she spit it out into the box she took out.

"Sorry, but I had to do that." she whispered in apology, her voice quieter than before, as if to soothe me or something like that.

"Its fine, just give me a better warning next time." I said, wiping my nose with my good hand. Fluttershy took my right arm and looked it over, before looking over my body with a serious face.

"That is a lot of bruises." She said with scrunched eyebrows. She shook herself out of staring at my incredibly sexy and muscular toned body before looking back at me... Ok, I might be exaggerating a little. I'm not exactly built like a Mr. Universe competitor, so you probably wouldn't be able to notice muscles through some of my chub. I can still be pretty fucking strong, but I don't have the sexiest body in the gy- ok enough of my random thoughts. Back to what's happening right now."Ok, I'm going to need you to sit up so I could see what I need to bandage" She said as she started flapping her wings to help pull me up. I probably could have done it myself, but she had my good arm. As soon as so I had a good position, she started to poke and prod me around my midsection. "Twilight, could you please turn to page three-hundred and ninety-four on the book that I brought in and read it to me?" Fluttershy requested.

Twilight levitated the book over to herself and started turning the pages. As she was doing it, I caught a glimpse of what the cover was and facepalmed internally.

Your monkey and You

By Angry Arnold the Onyx

...Ok, now they're just doing this shit on purpose!

Trixie seemed to agree as she spoke out.

"Out of all the books you could have grabbed, you picked the one about monkeys? Really now?" She snapped, irritated at the insinuation.

"H-he's not a pony. I picked the book that he reminded me of, and he looked like some of the monkeys I treated." Fluttershy stuttered as she justified herself, but trying to make herself small at the same time.

"Well, technically, she did guess right." I told her, just to help her out.

"I'm sorry?" Trixie asked, surprised at what I just said.

"I'm a human, or Homosapien."

"...You like stallions?" She questioned with her eyebrows raised. This caused me to blink.

"Wha- No, it means I'm a primate, or that I'm related to the primate families like monkeys and apes." As I was speaking, I heard some furious scribbling going on. I looked to see Twilight blazing through her parchment. "You okay, Twilight?" I asked.

"You just answered a lot of my questions." She replied, not even bothering to look up while she just kept scribbling and scribbling. After about a minute or two, she looked like she got finished and looked back up. "While Fluttershy gets you taken care of, I'm just going to ask you some more questions. Is that okay?"

"Are you going to let him finish a sentence this time?" Trixie asked her interrogatively, causing Twilight to flinch. That seemed a little uncalled for, but before I could say anything about it, Twilight beat me to it. Giving a nervous chuckle, she spoke to me, avoiding my gaze.

"Heh heh, sorry about that. Sometimes I get so excited and nervous and-"

"Nervicited?" I asked with a cheeky grin, alluding to the Equestria girls movie, which really wasn't that bad. Immediately after I said that, both Fluttershy and Twilight stopped what they were doing and looked at me.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" Twilight inquired as she looked me right in the eye, leaving the question to linger.

...WHY DID I SAY THAT!?!

Since Pinkie is one of the only ones to say that, I'm practically blurting out how much I know about them.

"Uh, I don't know, I kinda just made it up on the spot." I quickly lied. They kept looking at me for a couple seconds longer before Twilight spoke again.

"Hmmm... that sounds like a word Pinkie pie would make up. I bet you two would have a lot of fun together" She said, her suspicious expression morphing into a more friendly one. "As I was saying, I'm really sorry about the talking and the questions and the whole "invading your personal space" deal. Could we try that again?" She pleaded hopefully.

"Uhh sure, I can multitask." I said, knowing Fluttershy still probably needed to ask me questions or do other things. Twilight squeed as she picked up her parchment and quill.

"Could you bend your claw for me?" Fluttershy asked me, and I did. "Okay, they don't seem to be broken. You didn't feel any pain when you did, right?" I shook my head no.

"Would it be safe to assume that your claws are your primary means of manipulating objects." Twilight asked.

"Yea, pretty much." I agreed while nodding my head. "They aren't really claws though. The technical term is "hands"." As I said that she decided to scribble that down, Fluttershy spoke again.

"Very good. Now I want you to stretch your forelegs as far as they can go without hurting yourself..."

I've been answering questions, bending limbs, and having things been put in my mouth for three hours, and aside from Trixie butting in to make comment or to clarify something, it's pretty much been rinse and repeat. At first I though I was going to be able to handle this no problem, but it's turning into more and more of a headache. The fact that the stars and moon are out now capitalized my point. Do you have any idea how long three hours is?

It feels like one-hundred and eighty minutes.

"Okay, now say "awwwww"" Fluttershy asked me, holding a thermometer in her hoof. I opened my mouth as she put the pony sized thermometer in my mouth.

"Let's see... ninety eight point seven. Seems a little cold, Is that standard for you?" Twilight asked, still writing down the social structure on my planet.

"Yea, give or take." I said, my speech impaired by the hotdog sized thermometer.

"Uhhh, Twilight. I don't mean to throw you off your train of thought of anything like that, but isn't all this starting to sound familiar to you?" Fluttershy asked, beginning to bandage my midsection now. Twilight didn't appear to know what Fluttershy was alluding to, until she spoke again.

"Spike, make a note to send a letter to the canter-" Twilight stopped talking looked around for the young drake before giving a sigh. "I forgot he was with Rarity for now."

"For whom was the letter for, Princess Sparkle?" A regal voice called out from the far right.

"JESUS, Where the hell did you come from!?!" I shouted at Luna in heart pounding shock. She was standing at the entrance to the main door.

"Greetings to you too, Edgar." She deadpanned, shutting the door on way in. It's about time someone shut that thing. After all the ponies that came out of that door, I had a feeling if that door stayed open any longer the Spanish inquisition would arrive. Her expression softened as she started to walk up to the couch that Twilight was sitting in, cautious to not knock over the pile of parchments she made neatly stacked about six inches high high on the coffee table. "We see that thine new found acquaintances been busy of late. How goes thy recovery, Edgar?"

At this point I took the comically large thermometer out of my mouth and placed it on the table.

"I don't know." I turned to Fluttershy, hoping for an answer from her. "Give it to me straight, Doc. How long do I have left to live?"

The poor mare gave a small gasp before putting her roll of bandages down.

"Oh goodness no, you're not that seriously hurt." She said as she shook her head. "You are just really bruised."

"So other then that, I got a clean bill of health? That's it?" I questioned almost incredulously. "Then what is with all these bandages. Look at this!" I emphasized by trying to move my left arm, but because of the way Fluttershy wrapped it, couldn't move my left arm more than thirty degrees. "I've become one with the bandage!"

"If you moved that arm any further then that, you would end up bruised and sore longer. I did that to speed your recovery." She justified, not flinching in the slightest. I thought about what she said and it made sense, but now I feel like an asshole. At least she didn't wrap my right arm too much.

"Sorry."

"It's okay." She told me, continuing with her bandageing and forgiving my douchery in a heartbeat. While I was thinking about how I could get used to a place like this, Luna cleared her throat.

"As sweet as this may be, you still have not answered my question, Sparkle." Luna pointed out. "To whom is the letter going to be addressed to?"

"Oh, They were going to be sent to the Professor of Harmonics and the Professor of Quantum Theory at the Canterlot university." Twilight said as she levitated another piece of paper over.

"Well, then we suppose that you may wish to hold off on that. We have already ordered our guards to bring them to this castle." Luna revealed.

Is she a witch?

Seriously, how did she know Twilight was going to write a letter to them? Luna, almost as if she sensed our bewilderment, gave an explanation.

"After I left Little Pipsqueak in the care of Ponyville's best, I spoke with his mother, Bon Bon, about the possibility of collecting her herdmates." Herdmates? Don't tell me that It's "that" type of Equestria. "It was then that I learned that by sheer coincidence, two of the three herd mates that were currently in Canterlot were the scholars, or Professors that you were going to contact. We decided that we should not only fulfill our promise to the mare as quickly as possible, but we should also see if they might be able to discover how something otherworldly like you ended up in this world."

"Otherworldly?!?" Both Twilight and Fluttershy exclaimed in unison.

"What makes you so sure I am from another world, Princess? For all you know, I could be the last survivor of an underground species now awakening from an eon long hibernation." I said with sarcasm, trying to lighten the mood and change the subject. "That, or a species that is really good at hide and seek." Though in hindsight, I don't think that was very intelligent of me. Luna walked up to me and placed her hoof on me again, and just like before, her hair stopped the flowing thing it did and fell down into a straight style with slight curls at the ends. While Twilight started writing down some more mumbo jumbo, Luna took her hoof off me again and spoke once more.

"Nothing born of Equestria has ever been immune to magic. There have been creatures that used magic to repel magic, bent the laws of magic, devoured magic and even became magic itself, but nothing in known history that couldn't even be touched by it. Nothing...until you arrived. There are no other explanations." While Luna narrowed her gaze as if studying me, Twilight looked at Trixie in a mix of irritation and awe.

"You had an alien, one of the biggest scientific discoveries in our era, with you the entire time and you didn't think to tell anypony???" She said, flabbergasted at the unicorn.

"Hey, don't give Trixie that. This was literally the first place she came after we met." She shot back, defending herself in third person. I almost started to miss that until I took in account the way she said that.

Not if you count the night you met me.

I blushed at that thought. Bad Edgar, BAD!

"Girls, you're both pretty, now stop arguing." I said trying to stop an argument before it starts. They both looked at me with varying expressions. Trixie looked annoyed as she re-adjusted her hat while Twilight...

"You think I'm pretty? She asked, her expression...okay, I don't know how to describe it. It's like she's embarrassed too, but she doesn't know it yet. Her cheeks started to turn red, but her face didn't change at all. She just looked at me with her mouth slightly open as if in contemplation until I decided this was getting a little too awkward and cleared my throat.

"Ehem, so what happens now? Are the professors gonna try and study me tomorrow?" I asked, trying to get rid of the awkward feeling.

"Not likely, since their family in Ponyville was in danger not long ago. We would not be surprised if they spent some time to comfort their family and rest. As for myself, I wait until my sister and I decide what the next best course of action is. We know not from whence you came, or how you managed to even arrive in this land, but it does not appear to be by natural means. Rest assured, we will find out one way or another." She said with an air of finality, leaving the room in uneasy silence until Twilight thought it was her turn to clear her throat and change the subject.

"Speaking of which, I just have a few more questions now. This time, I want to talk to you about your magical immunity." Or not "Now are you immune to everything? Or just certain types of magic?"

"I don't even know what all the types of magic are. I just know that anytime a pony tried something magic on me, it ended up not working." I admitted, lifting one of my arms while Fluttershy bandaged that one.

"Could you at least cite some examples so I have a rough idea of what you are immune to?" Twilight asked.

Let's see, off the top of my head...

"I tried to get him a glass of wine, but as soon as he touched it I lost control." Trixie revealed, bring back memories of my first night here.

"Okay, so he can negate telekinesis. Anything else?" She said, prodding for more information.

"Before Telsona and I fought, she tried to make me hand over the filly I was with. You know, the one with a bow? Her eyes kept flashing, but aside from trying to give me a seizure I don't know what she was doing. Not only that, but she shot a fireball at me and couldn't pick up her sword when she was touching me." I described. Twilight took all this in, nodding as she adjusted her position.

"Her eyes were flashing?" Twilight repeated back to me. "It seems as if she tried to hypnotize you. It's good to know that you are immune to those spells too. I couldn't imagine what something strong enough to kill a changeling queen would do to a town like this." She commented.

"Yeeeaaaauuup see, here's the thing. I didn't kill her. She sped off into the Everfree somewhere." When I said that, a couple things happened at once. There was a loud tear as Twilight's quill pierced the umpteenth parchment she was writing on, and a girly gasp as Fluttershy tightened one of my bandages in surprise. "OW, WHAT THE HELL!?! WHY...Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked, uncomfortable that they were staring at me like that. Before long though, Twilight gave an uneasy laugh.

"Oh wow. Trixie you never said humans were such jokers. Heh heh heh." She tried to laugh it off.

"I am afraid he is speaking the truth, Twilight." Princess Luna told her. "When I arrived at the field I found Edgar in, I did not see a body that could even resemble that of a Queen. I suspect that she fled to hide and lick her wounds."

"B-but you said that the threat had been dealt with, that Edgar fended off the entire changeling army!" Twilight brought up, hoping to convince reality itself that Telsona will never be a problem again.

"We did, and we are sorry that we were not more careful in our phrasing. Edgar drove her off, but she is still a threat." She said as she walked to the door that she closed.

"Oh no oh no OH NO! This is a crisis. We barely handled the last attack! What's going to happen if she were to come with twice the amount of changelings as before? Or three times??? " You could almost see her hair frazzling strand by strand, following with almost comedic sounds of string snapping.

"Calm yourself, Twilight. You are not alone in this matter. She is still out there, and should she ever become a threat again, we must be even more vigilant than before to any dangerous plots she may be conceivi-" she stopped talking as her ears twitched a couple times. She started talking again as she advanced to the door, but more slowly this time around. "Conceiving. We must stay sharp and-"

She stopped talking when she got close enough, and soon, her horn started to glow and the door swung open at lightning speeds. A small, string-bean lookin', snow white earth pony guard with a blue and white mane, who had been presumably listening in on this conversation, fell through and make a loud clank with his armor when he hit the ground. He had a fairly large canvas saddlebag strapped to his side as his sword fell out of his holder, sliding with such force that it impaled one of the bed posts near one of Fluttershy's hooves. Fluttershy nearly fainted when it happened, while Twilight readied her horn in case something else happened.

When the guard looked up, he found himself trembling in fear under the mercilessly cold gaze of Princess Luna, who levitated him with her magic and walked with him over to the balcony window. As mean as it sounds, he looked quite pathetic.

"We'll address this issue later. Continue what you were doing for now." She said in a tone that barred no argument. With the rattling solar guard in tow, she flew off to God knows where.

"Oh dear, she's not going to hurt him is she?" Fluttershy asked, still shaking from her near injury.

"No, Fluttershy. Princess Luna isn't like that. She is probably going to punish him, but nothing that severe." Twilight reassured her friend, although after seeing Luna's look, she looked like she doubted her down words.

"If I had to guess, she was probably going to Batman him." I thought out loud, though I hope I'm wrong. Trixie looked at me with a quizzical expression.

"What’s that even supposed to mean?" She asked me.

"I don't think you want to know."

...

**Third person POV**
Approximately three kilometers above the ground**

Resting high on a cloud above Ponyville, Princess Luna glared at the guard she has suspended in her magic. She has been watching him squirm for three minutes now, watching his hooves moving in her grasp, trying to get a footing that was not there. She herself did not look forward to this next part, but there are consequences when you do not obey your superiors. This was just another form of discipline to her. After all, discipline is just a rougher form of learning.

"Y-y-your majesty, Pleeease put me down! I-I-I didn't mean anything by it. I won't do it again. I promise!" The private stuttered in terror. "I-I don't like heights."

"Silence!" Luna boomed at him, shutting him up with nary a whimper as he seemed to try harder and harder for him to keep himself composed. "You were spying on us, Even after we specifically told you to take leave. You deliberately disobeyed me...Why?" She asked.

"I-I was... I was-" Private Khan was trying to speak, but was way to hesitant for Luna's patience.

"I want an answer NOW!!" Luna shouted, blowing his azure hair back while simultaneously causing him to clench his eyes shut on reflex. He readjusted himself though, trying to give the gaze he was trained to do as a royal guard and to give her a satisfactory answer.

"I-" Private Khan started, before clearing his throat and talking in a stalwart voice. Well, as stalwart as one can while floating miles above the ground. "I needed to make sure that the creature was not going to harm you. It's unknown and unfa-AHHHHHHH!!!!!" Luna's horn stopped glowing, and with it the magic that was holding Little Khan in the air.

Private Khan screamed in terror while he was plummeting downward at terminal velocity, feeling the air rush through past him as he came closer and closer to the ground. His body twisted and turned in the air like a rag doll during his descent while all four of his hooves were scrambling everywhere , the primordial instinct to find anything to grab onto overpowering any rational thoughts. As the air blew in his face, he was forced to squint his eyes to keep the force of falling from damaging them. He didn't have to keep them shut for long however, as he noticed the sensation started to fade, and...reverse?

Opening his eyes, he saw that he was glowing in a dark blue aura and was once again floating upward at a higher speed. His velocity started to slow as was now at eye-level with the Princess still laying on the cloud she was when they first arrived here. She narrowed her eyes and spoke to the Private.

"One year. That's what it takes to graduate from the strict training regimen of the Royal Guard. Do you expect me to believe that in that one year, you still hadn't learned that the princesses of Equestria are more than capable of defending themselves? Don't you dare lie to me." She snarled at Private Khan, who was this point hyperventilating. She knew that he was hiding something yet again from her, and this time she was going to find out. "Try again, but this time I want the truth."

"I-I was walking back to the barracks when I was heard a yell. When I heard it, I ran up to the door it came from and listened in." Private Khan admitted.

"Did you know who was behind that door?"

"Not at first, no," He said while shaking his head. "but when I heard you talk, I realized that you were in there questioning some of the ponies there."

"So you knew I was in there, yet you did not respect my privacy and leave?" Her tone shifted darker, as she found the blatant disrespect of privacy aggravating. "Curiosity killed the cat, Private. You could have heard secrets that were not supposed to leave that room, and if it were anypony else that caught you, you would be thrown into a dungeon and left there until the matter of national security had been dealt with. So now I ask: Why did you stupidly decide to stay when you knew the consequences? Tell me why you were spying!" She demanded.

"Pl-Please, I don't wa-" Khan's breath caught mid-sentence as he felt the Magic that suspended him waver for a mere fraction of a second. That was not the answer she was looking for. He saw the Princess of the night get up from her spot, and with one flap of her wings she launched herself off the cloud, letting both herself and her magic drop once more.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAHHAHHHHHHH, PLEEEEASE STOP!!!!!!" Khan yelled, begging for Luna to help him. "I'M SORRY!!!!"

He could barely hear himself due to the roar of the wind, but Princess Luna, who was currently in a controlled free fall with him, heard him all too clearly.

"Answer me!" She commanded, not acknowledging his request.

Little Khan caught a glimpse at the ground that was fast approaching and his mind went blank. He continued to fall though the air, screaming all the while. He must have fell a mile until Luna spoke, or shouted again.

"DAMMIT, I WON'T ASK AGAIN!!!" She shrieked, her anger and patience reaching a limit with this guards persistence.

Khan looked back to the ground he was being pulled to, and started to panic even more than before. The objects on the ground, which previously looked like they were the size of a grain of salt, now looked like the size of a wasp, and were getting bigger and bigger in his eyes. In an emotional state of terror, he started blubbering out any words and phrases he could think of. For the most part, they were incoherent. But there was one word she recognized from the mess he was spouting out.

Well, not a word, per say. It was more like a name, which satisfied Luna enough.

Khan clenched his eyes shut and covered his face with his hooves, bracing himself for the life-ending impact, that never came. When he realized that he was in fact still breathing, he slowly removed his quivering hooves away from his face and opened his eyes. He was floating in Princess Luna's aura yet again, only this time, he was so close to the ground his tail was dragging on the grass. He looked up and saw the princess standing about four steps in front of him, and they were both in the middle of a field.

"I'm going to need to have you repeat what you were saying. If you can do that, you're free to leave." Luna promised to the guard, her anger softening. She knew the colt was probably scared out of his mind right now after what she did, and even more emotional due to what he witnessed earlier, but she had to make sure be wasn't a spy, or planning on defecting. Such a thing would obliterate the morale that she will need to garner the support of the nation with what she is planning.

As for Private Khan, this whole ordeal hit him like a train wreck. He stuttered in shame as he spoke his next sentence, still jittery with the adrenaline rush he received from the fall.

"C...could you please put me down, I don't like heights." He pleaded. Princess Luna nodded and gently lowered him back onto the sweet earth, a feeling of relief putting him at ease as he felt the grass he had become well acquainted with. He let himself relax, still reeling from he just endured, but did not let himself get too comfortable. He still had to answer Luna's question. "I-I was going to leave, I swear, but then I heard that awful name... her name." Khan almost spat out. Though he did not want to say it again, Luna knew exactly who he was implying. "She got away..."

Something peculiar happened after he said that. Soon, melody music played yet again, and this was starting to trouble Luna.

Again?

"She was defeated, and rest assured that-"

"You said you would make her pay."

"I said I would do my best. As of now, she is missing both her army and if what our visitor said is true, her eye." Luna told him, trying to remain patient with him right now. He seemed very irritated, to say the least. But it wasn't as if it wasn't entirely out of the blue. "We understand thy plight, believe us, bu-"

"NO, you don't understand!" Khan interrupted in a sudden outburst of mounting frustration, taking Luna by surprise by how unexpected it was for a pony, a guard at that, to talk back to a princess like this. "I don't give a shit about her missing an eye or a hoof, or ANYTHING!" Tears of fury started to pour out as he unleashed his verbal rage. He was talking to Luna, but it's almost as if he meant to yell at all of Equestria. "The closest thing I had to a family is missing a heartbeat and that...That fucking MONSTER is still out there! We were supposed to be a team. ME AND HIM AGAINST THE CORRUPT, THE EVIL, AND SHE TOOK THAT AWAY!!!" He stopped take a breath, starting to get more and more tired, as a tremor wracked his body. "...and I didn't even get a chance to tell him how sorry I was." he let himself fall onto his rump, exhausted because of all the stress he relieved himself of.

"And so, the pieces fall into place." Luna thought.

Princess Luna stood there for a while as she watched him punch the ground again and again, feeling sorry for the young stallion and slightly out of place. She then walked up to the guard and sat at his side, offering a shoulder to cry on. While her methods may sometimes seem questionable at best, she was by no means completely heartless.

He resisted at first, before finally succumbing to the need to rest.

"I have to find her and make her pay. I can never forgive myself if I don't at least try."

"If you find her, what then? Will you storm the badlands all in your lonesome, brave the hordes of magic-wielding changelings and their queen?" Princess Luna questioned, she tried to get through to the young colt. "Believe me when I say that I know of your frustrations, and that I'm sorry for your loss, but that only happens in fairy tales." She looked at the heartbroken look the guard was giving and shook her head sympathetically. "But I also want to to have faith that Telsona will receive what is coming to her. I will be pushing for that."

Princess Luna got up and flexed her wings, preparing herself for take off.

"Before I leave, I'm ordering you to get a good night's rest, and at nine-hundred hours I want you to report to the main tent located at 6th and Fleet street. There still is an issue that needs to be addressed." Luna turned to look at the guard, who was rubbing his eyes and trying to remove any evidence of his outburst. His breathing was calming, so that was a good sign. "There are field-expedient barracks located near the left wing of Princess Twilight’s castle, about a twenty minute walk from here. Are you okay to walk by yourself?"

Private Khan nodded his head, satisfying Luna with his answer. As she took off toward the castle, he got up and walked to the Barracks quarters, thinking more about what Luna said.

He never was the strongest guard, or the biggest, or the fastest, or anything really. He knew Princess Luna was right... but that wasn't going to stop him, because if there was one thing he was sure of, he was the most stubborn guard there was. He'll show her, and everypony else what he can do. He might not be able to do anything yet, but he'll be damned if he gave up now. He's just going to have to train much harder and much more often. Every chance he gets if he has to.

And why should he stop there. He could miss a night or two of sleep every week or so. He'll take any chance he can get to speed his training.

If he ever, no, When he finds that murderer again, he will be ready.

***Edgar's POV*
**guest room.**

"...Seriously, it was like she was the bastard child of a Sith Lord and Mary Poppins." I yawned to Twilight, who was still taking notes right now. "She was plain evil, but at the same time she made herself look and sound like she was polite and courteous."

I didn't go into too much detail about what actually happened. I don't want to have to remember anything in the future, but I said just enough to explain how I ended up bruised and in the middle of a field.

It was getting pretty late after Luna left with what's-his-name. Fluttershy finished with her doctoring a while ago, bandaging everything except my right arm and legs in case I needed to use the restroom. She was currently munching on an apple from the fruit bowl she brought in. I got halfway through eating a banana when Trixie pointed how I was eating the banana like a monkey, causing the girls to laugh. I lost my appetite after that hypocritical remark. She got on Fluttershy's case about the monkey book earlier.

"It's still amazing how you were able to hold her off." Twilight remarked. "Though, I suppose it shouldn't be too surprising, considering how you said you come from a combat-oriented species."

"Not just combat. We like inventing and music and all the other things you do. It just so happens that we like fighting too." I explained, my eyes widening at what I said. "Hey, look at that. I rhymed. I'm a poet, and I didn't know it."

I'm positive Trixie was going to facehoof when I said that, but I don't think she would have gotten the chance because the knock on the door interrupted the whole interview thing we had going on.

"Come in." Twilight beckoned. The door opened as it glowed an indigo, and standing behind it wa- Good fucking Lord, what the hell is that?

Standing behind the door was an almost hellish looking creature, with sickly green, mud-like goo on its face and a ritualistic looking spiral turban on its head. One eye appeared to be a normal baby blue, while the other was a covered with a light green disk. It's alien appearance was covered by what I could only describe as a thick ceremonial robe. Whether or not I was going to be a sacrifice, I didn't know. What I did know w-

"Twilight Darling, is this where you have been all afternoon?" The creature smiled, taking off the cucumber slice so it can get a better look at her.

Oh, it's just Rarity

"Um, what that on your face?" I asked the fashionista.

"Oh this? Why it's my beauty mask. An invasion like the one from this morning can give absolutely Dreadful worry lines. So I'm taking care of the problem before it starts." she explained, while she pushed the towel wrapped on her head so that it was "just right".

"Where did you even get the stuff to make that mask?" Trixie inquired.

"Well, you'd be surprised at what you can make with a few home recipes and enough determination. This one is made of cotton balls, avocado, cucumbers, and toi- are those apples and bananas?" Rarity asked out of the blue, trotting over to the fruit bowl. "OH, These would be a fine addition to my cream! Could you, perchance, spare a few fruits?" She asked me, batting her eyelashes.

"Uhhhhh." I knew what she was doing, or trying to do. I just didn't know what else to do in this awkward situation. I don't want to give her any ideas or anything. I jumped a little when the sound of glass shattering reverberated across the room. Glancing over to where it came from, I just barely caught a glimpse at Trixie's furrowed eyebrows and pursed lips, before she looked at the glass shards and spilled lemonade on the floor.

"Oops, clumsy me. I'll go...fetch a towel. Yea, that's it. Trixie will grab a towel." Trixie said as she hopped of the bed and towards the bathroom, scowling all the way. As soon as she went in, she shut the door a little harder then needed, causing everybody to flinch a little at the sound.

"It wasn't something I said, was it?" Rarity asked with a concerned look.

"I think she's tired and stressed." I defended, coming to the rescue. "What, with all the things that happened today and yesterday, I'm not surprised she might be be a little on edge." And I don't think the one million questions help one bit. My point was emphasized when I heard a symphony of squeaks from the rubber ducky Fluttershy tossed into the bathroom, along with some angry pony noises. Twilight cleared her throat and spoke once more.

"Did you just come to check on us?" Twilight asked.

"Oh no, Darling. I just wanted to tell you of the wondrous idea I thought of. Both the girls and I agree that this would be splendid to do." Another long drawn out squeak and growl came from the bathroom. "...Though, I think that our new friend would benefit too." The bathroom door opened, and out came Trixie with a large towel and a trash can floating in her magical grasp. As she began picking up the pieces of glass and wiping up her mess, Rarity spoke again. "So originally, I was making some of this mud mask and I got to thinking how relieving this was going to be. I started to think about inviting Fluttershy and you to join me, but then I thought "Why stop there?"."

"And where is this going?" I asked Rarity.

"I'm getting to that, Dear. Anyway, I was thinking that all of us could have a sleepover together. We could have pillow fights, do each others' makeup and mane," Rarity glanced over to Twilight. "and then when the little ones tire themselves out, we could talk about stallions and the like. It'll be fun." She said. "Are you game?"

"How are we supposed to get Edgar there?" Trixie asked, tossing the towel into the waste hamper.

"I don't think it would be a good idea to move Edgar around too much yet." Fluttershy commented. "It might not be good for him."

"So we're just going to leave him alone?" Trixie asked, a little uneasy at the idea.

"I don't think he would want to listen to us babble on about dresses and tea anyway, right?" Rarity asked me.

"I kinda just wanna close my eyes right now." I remarked. It's been an exhausting day, so I should probably get some zee's.

"You want to sleep now??? But we just got started!" Twilight exclaimed, picking up her quill once more. "I still have questions about the history of your race, your social hierarchy, your Panda Express and the Panda who are running it..." She probably would have kept going, but some kind deity decided to spare my sanity. She looked at the pile from where she would have picked up another parchment, only to realize that she ran out of them. She then looked over to the mounting pile of parchments that she finished front and back, and started to get an embarrassed look. "Though, I suppose we could take a break for the night."

The girls got up from the couch and went to follow Rarity out the room, though Trixie lingered at the doorway.

"Are you sure you don't want somepony to stay with you?"

"Eh, go have fun Trixie. I'll just wallow in my loneliness and sorrow." I said dramatically, giving a reassuring smile. "Hey, I rhymed again. Just call me Dr. Seuss."

"Trixie darling, are you coming?" A silvery voice called out from the hall.

Trixie stayed a little longer before I saw a corner of her cheek move into a slight smile. "You're a dork. Have a good night, okay?" she said affectionately, using her magic to snuff out the candle flames, Enshrouding the room in a blanket of dark. What was originally Trixie turned into a shadowy silhouette in the doorway, which readjusted her hat and then quickly galloped to try and catch up with the group, leaving the door to swing shut.

I was left alone in the dark with my thoughts, letting out a sigh of relief. I was just rubbing elbows with ponies that shouldn't have even existed moment ago, and it just blows my mind that this was all happening, both in good ways and bad ways. Good because of obvious reasons, but bad because now its making me doubt this is even real. Aside from crazy bitch that almost killing me, It's been a dream come true so far, but what if that's all this is. A dream.

Damn, I'm doing that thing. You know, when you lay down in bed, you just stay awake and think about random shit for a little while? I better stop myself before I end up thinking about and regretting some embarrassing moment from fourth grade.

It's funny, after thinking about all these thoughts I couldn't help but feel a strange mix of giddiness and fear? if i was to use a word for it, I would say that I'm feeling...nervicited? Yea, that's probably the best way to describe it. This place is supposed to be full of dragons, magic, ponies and much more, and there's no telling what's going to happen tomorrow. That in itself scares the shit out of me, but at the same time I can't wait to see what happens tomorrow, or the next day and so on.

With that I shut my eyes and try to force myself to go to sleep, but after hearing my stomach growl I knew that it was going to be hard to sleep with an empty stomach. I know that late night snacking is a bad habit, but it's not like nobody else has ever done it. I reach over and try to take an apple from the fruit bowl, only to find nothing there. After waving my hand around the nightstand a little bit, I gave up searching for the fruit and just turned over. What a terrible way to end the day.

Author's Note

I really need to be more Original with chapter titles

By the way, If you haven't read any of MadMaxtheblack's stories, i would suggest you give them a try. They are phenomenal

I would like to thank Frix and Ocean stardust for Proofreading this chapter for me, MadMaxtheblack for not suing me for borderline copyright infringement, Portal82 for giving me an idea for the next chapter, and finally I would like to thank you guys for looking absolutely ravishing this evening.

(I might have to make some last minute changes, so be prepared for that.

Chapter Nine: Introductions, Interrogations, they both start with an "I" - 2/3
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Nine: Introductions, Interrogations, they both start with an "I" - 2/3

(A.K.A Chapter Nine and two-thirds: The one without Edgar)

"That it is better One-Hundred guilty Persons should escape than that one innocent person should suffer, is a Maxim that has been long and generally approved."

-Benjamin Franklin, letter to Benjamin Vaughan, March 14, 1785.

***Third person POV***
**Main hall**
*roughly an hour after breakfast*

"Come on Twilight, you go first."

"I will, just give me a moment."

"She'll get done talking to the Apple ponies over there any second and you will miss your chance."

"I said give me a moment!" Twilight snapped at Trixie, causing her to jump a bit. "I'm sorry Trixie. I'm sorry. I just...I'm trying to catch my breath before going over there..." Twilight apologized, trying to calm her nervous heart.

After the Trixie, Twilight, and the rest of their friends finished up having a communal breakfast in the castle, ponies slowly started to file out of the castle to try their best to continue on and resume their day to day life and help with clean-up of Ponyville. They all can't mope around and freeload forever, so it is up to them to repair the town and continue doing what their cutie marks have destined them to do. They still can't do anything major until the New Yolk contractors arrive, but they can at least give it a head start.

It won't quite be the same for a while. Removing broken glass, repairing doors and bridges, restoring the parks(which thankfully were not too damaged), this was done under the alert eye of the royal guards, many of which were not local to Ponyville. As they didn't know the population, it is a bit difficult for Twilight to see them looking upon her friends in town with distrust, not knowing if any of them could have been Changelings. She could not blame them, and she is thankful that not many other ponies would have noticed this from the Royal Guard. She was also thankful that it wouldn't last long. Either this will come to pass and they will look upon the ponies they are watching over as new friends(although the change would be unnoticeable to the other citizens), or the danger would pass and they can return to their own families in the cities they watched over.

There weren't as many as what came yesterday when Luna arrived, but Twilight knew that was due to many of these guards being tasked with removing the many bodies of the dead changelings to be "allocated". Either for them to be donated to the scientific universities in Canterlot, or to simply be burned far away from Ponyville.

Twilight's many friends slowly dispersed out of the area to take care of their respective tasks, though not alone as Twilight asked for quite a few of the guard reinforcements to accompany and keep the Elements of Harmony safe.

Pinkie Pie bounded off a little while ago to see what was taking Sugarcube corner so long to be declared "safe to start cleaning up". She commented that she had a lot of work to do to make sure everypony kept smiling, and while it seemed innocent like most of her statements, Twilight believed she might have her work cut out for her for the next few days at least.

Fluttershy said she didn't need any guard escorts, and left with Discord to go back to her cottage shortly after Pinkie bounced off. Apparently she was not too worried about any damage to the cottage itself, and with good reason. The first warning sign Fluttershy got was with almost all the smaller animals(apart from her rabbit "Angel") scurrying or flying off in the opposite direction of where the changelings were marching in. It was due to this warning that Twilight was able to get as many ponies sheltered within her castle during the first stages of the invasion. As for many of the larger animals, Fluttershy just so happened to be trying to settle a love-triangle dispute between two female Grizzly bears and one very stressed out male Grizzly about their version of "Cub-Support". In addition, an angsty adolescent Grizzly bear was also just being an all-round pain in the flank, just wondering who his real mother was, however that could have happened.

The bears were stressed, temperamental, angry, and likely too much for the changelings to worry about taking a bite out of during that time. Really, Fluttershy was going back to feed the bears and settle this dispute, as well as catch up on her veterinarian duties before making time to check up on Edgar later in the evening.

Rainbow Dash wasn't at all satisfied that she didn't get to fight as many changelings as she wanted to before I forced her inside with a quick teleport. She has been stressed lately from her multiple Wonder Bolt applications and have been awaiting results that are supposed to come in anytime between two weeks to five years. This ridiculous time frame left her on edge, and she was anxious to take it out on anything, be it a punching bag, a karate sparing session, the race track, or the first changeling/monster she sees. Because of this, she has been on patrol both by herself and any Pegasus and Thestral guard that can keep up with her for an extended period of time. This has been a good thing so far, as the guard have been getting compliments for how much safer the town feels with her constant patrols.

Rarity, surprisingly enough for somepony who overreacts with the littlest things, hasn't complained one bit. Probably because doesn't have much of a reason to since Spike immediately left to go and help her with any clean-up the Carousel Boutique might need. Rarity gets to get help in general clean-up with pleasant company, and Spike gets some "Alone time with a total babe". It was a win/win for the two of them.

As for Twilight....

It all sounded so simple at first. Just walk up at talk to Celestia. Ask how her and Luna's talk with Edgar is going, and see if it is safe for him to join them again. At least to quell Trixie's anxiety, but she found it difficult to take a step toward Celestia, who has now been speaking to the Apple family for a while now. Apple Bloom seemed to be missing from their group, so all that one could see was a lime-green elder mare, a Stenson-wearing blonde with orange coat, and an absolute giant of a red-coated stallion currently seated on a wheel chair due to his hurt hindleg. To Twilight, they were Granny Smith, Applejack, and "Big" Macintosh respectively, and respected they were in this little town Twilight called home. They had a long history dating back to the founding of this town, and their entire bloodline has roots planted all over Equestria, both figuratively and literally.

To Princess Twilight Sparkle's luck, they hadn't noticed her yet, as they had their backs toward her while speaking with Princess Celestia. It was anypony's guess as to what they were talking about, as Twilight had not moved an inch toward them. Twilight's luck seemed to be changing however, as she did catch the eye of Celestia.

Princess Celestia herself never made any facial "tells" to show that she was aware of Twilight, but Twilight know instantly as in her mind, she heard a voice vying for her attention.

("Please come here, my faithful student. I will wait")

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Princess Twilight swallowed hard. It is likely that Princess Celestia has been waiting for Twilight to start walking up for quite a while now. After performing some of the breathing techniques that her foal sitter taught her, she started to walk toward the ponies, followed by the blue magician.

"Y'all make sure he finishes it now. Ah reckon its gotta be a nice change from bananas an ant-hills all the time!" The elder mentioned. Her eyes weren't as good as they used to be, but if it looks like a monkey, walks like a money, and is called a monkey by the rest of the town, Edgar probably liked bananas.

"I am sure it will not take much convincing. You're quite is quite the chef yourself, as I am told. If the revered "Granny Smith" made this special for him, and he will be sure to appreciate it, as will my sister and I. Thank you for your charitable donation to this town." Celestia complimented while holding a serving tray with three bowls of oatmeal on it perfectly level, effortlessly demonstrating her dexterity and control of magic.

"Tain't nuthin off our backs. Thank him! We ain't done payin him back by a long shot, no ma'am." Granny Smith declared, prompting a chuckle from Celestia.

Princess Celestia looked up toward Princess Twilight, as if she just noticed she was approaching them.

"Oh, good morning Twilight," She said to her, before turning toward the costumed azure unicorn standing beside her. The Great and Powerful Trixie was currently shaking, or more like "vibrating" in place due to her nervousness at meeting the Princess Celestia in the flesh. She suddenly caught herself and remembered that she should have been bowing, and thus proceeded to do so. "...and the Great and Powerful Trixie Lulamoon, I presume?"

Trixie perked up.

"Hah! My rrrrreputation precedes me!" Trixie exclaimed triumphantly in an admittedly silly showmareship fashion, rolling her "r's" with a hoof raised to her puffed-out chest. Her eyes were closed with a confident smile. This pose likely took practice to nail as well as she had it, it is a wonder how she knew if the close-eyed addition was going to work out for her if she could not see herself in the mirror. "You may call me "The Great and Powerful Trixie" for short, and the "Great and Powerful Trixie" is pleased that you have heard of us."

"Indeed, though your wanted posters have your mane at a darker shade of blue." Celestia said as she leaned it. Neither Trixie's smile nor her tense pose dropped as she was still frozen in place, but her now nervous eyes shot open at the speed of cracking glass, her breath hitching with an "eep" coming from between her still-smiling teeth.

Celestia then giggled, and her laugher eased Trixie's worries as she visibly relaxed. "Don't worry, I am only teasing. My student pardoned you a long time ago due to this "Alicorn Amulet" she wrote about, and there are no more wanted posters out for you. I could only guess you were "The Great and Powerful Trixie" by both my student and my sister's description of your uniform. You certainly look the part of a Falling Star student."

"You could tell?" Trixie asked Celestia with one raised eyebrow, before suddenly raising the other one in suite and shifting her attention to Twilight. "Wait Twilight, you already pardoned before I came?" Trixie asked, with wide eyes, before suddenly becoming quiet as she saw Twilight and the three Apple ponies lock eyes.

After a short pause in the group's little corner of the room, Princess Celestia ears perked up as if she was listening for something. She then spoke once more, continuing her conversation with Trixie.

"I still believe your name has too many syllables. I hope I am not being rude, but in the interest of expediency I would like to either call you "Trixie" or "Miss Lulamoon" for short-er. In return, you may simply call me "Celestia". Don't worry about bowing either, as a friend of Twilight's is a friend of mine." The Solar Princess bargained with a disarming smile. Upon looking back at her faithful student and the founding family of Ponyville, Celestia turned back to Trixie. "...Miss Lulamoon, may I ask you to follow me for a moment? I have a question about this "Alicorn Amulet" business, and was hoping you could enlighten me on it. Specifically, where it may have went..." Celestia started walking away Trixie felt a gentle nudge to her side from a glowing yellow force.

The Great and Powerful Trixie started to follow Princess Celestia as the walked past Twilight. As Princess Twilight began to turn around and follow suit, the Solar diarch stopped her.

"Would you please mind waiting here for a moment Twilight. If I am not mistaken from Applejack's prior letters to me, it seems that Cider season may be coming up around this time of year. May I ask you to please speak with your friend Applejack about placing a fairly large order for the Life Party and getting this scheduled? We decided on a date for about a month and a half away starting today." As she kept walking. "We won't be long."

Celestia's voice echoed in Twilight's mind once more.

("I think you and Applejack's family may need to talk and clear the air. I have spoken to them earlier, and they are still having a difficult time coming to terms with the events of yesterday. I know this may be difficult, judging from the melody magic I am starting to hear again.

Please shield yourself and your emotions from this music. Once you are done, we shall be waiting here for you.

If you believe you need me for any reason, you need only ask and I will be there immediately for you.")

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***Twilight's POV***

Princess Celestia and Trixie started to walk away, and though I had just cast a shield upon myself to shield myself, I felt as if my true protection was leaving me that moment. I swallowed and turned back toward the Apple family.

I know that there were many ponies in the main hall chattering, just like I knew that stars were out even in the daylight. But I could not register them in this moment. I heard nothing from the other ponies still in the hallways, talking to the guards, talking to their friends, talking to each other. Not even the music mattered in this moment, as it paled in comparison to the deafening silence between myself and the Apples.

...

"H-" Not even a breath of sound came out of my mouth before Applejack beat me to it.

"We got it handled, Sugarcube." Applejack declared, trotting over to Big Mac to help him off the chair he was sitting down on. My horn glowed with magic as I went to try and help lift him out of the chair before Applejack looked back at me with a salty scowl, as if trying to use her own magic to stop me. "Ah said we got it handled."

I let my magic drop. They have every right to be upset with me, but it hurts that they aren't even accepting my help. Maybe I can help a different way?

"Celestia noticed more melody magic. I couldn't tell it was audible until now, but it may do things to you if you aren't careful. I can't help you with it unless I shield you myself, but I need your permission."

"We ain't staying for much longer. We're actually just on our way". Applejack spoke plainly, not meeting my eyes this time. "If it's here like you're saying, then it's all the more better we get on outta here."

There was an slight silence after the fact before Granny Smith broke it and eased the tension if only for a moment.

"Celestia is right. Cider Seasons coming up in bouta month, we reckon. Its probably gonna be the busiest one in quite a hot minute." Granny Smith predicted. "We already spoke with Celestia, and Big Mac wanted to tough it out. He would rather wait outside for Applejack to fetch the wagon than have somepony waste time walkin the wheel chair back any. We're gone be on our way." She declared as even she walked over to try and give Applejack a hoof in getting Big Mac on his three hooves. "We'll just count on getting a buncha munchies, bushels of apples, an barrels of cider ready ahead of time."

I took another few steps forward as I approached them with guilt weighing down my step. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife. I tried clearing my throat, attempting to find the right words.

"I-Is Apple Bloom okay now? She had fun last night's sleepover, but I haven't seen her since earlier this morning."

None of them responded.

"Please...Granny Smith...AppleJack...Big Mac..." I turn to each one of them. "I am so sorry. About what happened with Apple Bloom... I'm so sorry. Just tell me she's okay."

"Twi, Ah'd like to be civil, but ah don't think were in the mood right now. Apple Bloom's just fine now that she's back with her own." Applejack assured bitterly. Coming from the Element of Honesty, it was bittersweet hearing that Apple Bloom was doing better after what I ended up putting her through.

Granny Smith looked at Applejack with eyes weathered by age, conveying a mix of disappointment and frustration. She shook her head, and as she walked up to me, she gave me a short hug before turning around and walking away.

"Young'en, I appreciate you tryna apologize and look out for us, but now ain't the time. The Apple family's got work to do, and we need some time...and a-bit of space." Facing away from me as she started walking away. It felt like her hug was to try and soften the blow of the shunning aura I felt coming off her.

Don't cry...Don't cry...Don't cry.

She doesn't seem angry, or maybe she is trying to hide it well. Fat chance she actually wants you to feel better though. Did you hear the way she said that? She's disappointed in you.

She almost lost the foal of the family, so she has every right to judge you. She doing such a better job than you at keeping her poker face and if she can do it, so can you.

"Granny Smith, I know, and I know that you're angry. I put Apple Bloom in danger, and I can't apologize enou-"

"Neither Granny nor Big Mac nor I wanna hear it." Applejack said curtly gritted teeth. "You can't just fix everything with a "sorry". It won't change what you chose."

"Applejack, you know that we couldn't let the shield down." I tried to justify. Whether to Applejack or myself, it was hard to say. "Not with the other ponies insi-" I was cut off with a scoff. Once they finally got Big Mac upright, Applejack turned toward me with a look as if I had just slapped her.

"We?!?" Applejack asked incredulously, as if I had just slapped her, gestured to the two other Apples present. ""We" don't have your fancy magic, Twi." Applejack said as her eyes seemed to glisten in frustration as she took her hoof and pushed it into me with every word she emphasized. "There weren't no we that moment. You kept the shield up. You made us watch! That was all you ."

Don't cry...Don't cry...Don't Cry...

She's being honest, but you need to bury your emotions for now. You can cry when nopony else is in the room, but they can't see you cry. You can't let them see you cry. You need to keep a brave face for everypony, and keep them in a peaceful state of mind.

Applejack has always put her family above her friends. Any pony would. All you did was show her what you were capable of. Suffer though and take it like a mare. If you really deserved her forgiveness, you'll earn it.

Applejack looked as if she had more to say and get off her chest, but Big Macintosh rested his hoof on his sister's shoulder to stop her. Whether to calm her down or to give me respite from it, it was welcome.

"I gotta go get the wagon and get back to takin care of The Farm. Big Mac got hurt trying to save Apple Bloom, and while he's restin, I got my work cut out for me. Apple Bloom and Granny will be helping take care of each other and Mac. "

"Please. I never asked for any of this to happen. I didn't know what else to do. I..." My words died out as I saw the tired look that Big Mac gave me, shaking his head as if to warn me to stop talking and making it worse for either Applejack and myself.

Big Macintosh never said anything as he saw the entire exchange between his family and I, but did he really need to when his silence already spoke volumes? His tired, furrowed brows looking at me to see what else I had to say, or if he needed to try and hold his sister back.

Don't cry...Don't cry...Don't cry...

You haven't even earned the right to cry yet, have you? To try and squeeze every last bit of pity from the Apples themselves?

You saw Big Mac's looks the entire time, though you didn't want to acknowledge it. Big Mac has always been a quiet stallion, answering with either a 'Euyep" or a "Nope". It always got the point across, but why would he waste even that on you, especially after an excuse like that? At least Big Mac tried doing something when they grabbed Apple Bloom. He did way more than you, and after his kick killed one of the drones, his leg got beaten to Tartarus and has multiple hairline-fractures courtesy of the changelings that came to hold him down and take revenge for their fallen brethren.

Wow, even the Changelings have done more to protect their own than a coward like you tried to do for Ponyville. The only reward he got from protecting family was now his workload is being passed onto them.

He probably had nothing nice to say, and if he didn't, he wouldn't say it at all to you. He is a polite stallion.

"Ah'm gettin' old, Twilight, and I ain't gonna be around fer my grandfoals fur'ever." Granny Smith finally said with a solumn tone. "Ah...don't wanna bury any more of my family before ah go. Ah get why you chose whatcha did. It is whut it is... but don't ask us to accept it. It still hurts. If yer fixin' to try and make this right, I reckon you should start by giving us time and space like ah already said. Please...just drop it for now, and please take care of yerself."

Don't cry...Don't cry...Don't Cry...Don't Cry...DON'T CRY!!!

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I stayed strong, barely. Eventually, the Apples turned a corner as they walked outside of the into Ponyville. I didn't see Apple Bloom with them, but since I suspect they already know where to find her. Once they were out of earshot, I called some guards over with a magic signal. Often times, these were used to silently call guards in case of an intruder or if there was a drunk party-goer at a Gala. However, I wanted to make an exception and make sure that Applejack and her family got home safely, so they will act as a both an escort for Applejack and possibly the ones to pull the wagon if Applejack would let them.

If anypony asks, it was by Princess Celestia's request.

*Meanwhile*

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"May I ask if you know where this "Alicorn Amulet" may have went? Twilight said it may have affected your mind and heart, so I would like to keep it out of reach from over-inquisitive hooves." Celestia asked still walking beside Trixie. The magician shook her head, before raising it and meeting Princess Celestia's eyes. She had to lean her neck back pretty far in order to look directly at her, and as her hat started to fall backwards, Trixie started to hold it in place with her magic.

"The Great and Powerful Trixie is privy to many of Equestria's hidden secrets, but not this one. After Twilight conceived that ruse to get Trixie to take it off, we have never seen it again. Trixie thinks Twilight may have hidden it or destroyed it."

"...Very well, I believe you." Celestia said a bit too quickly for Trixie's liking.

"Really, you would believe Trixie just like that?" Trixie asked Celestia. She was honestly expecting the inquisition after the prior question, but found nothing of the sort.

"If I may be plain, I would not normally. However, I trust in Twilight's beliefs when she wrote that letter regarding its fate being "ambiguous", as she put it. If you do not know, then I suspect that other ponies will have a nigh-impossible time finding it or even discovering it." After a moment more of walking, Celestia came to a stop. "Truthfully, I needed a reason to give space for Twilight and the Apple family."

"That rude Hillfilly's family? She's been nothing but a stubborn meat-head since Trixie had met her!"

"Yes, the Element of Honesty and my friend, Applejack." Celestia corrected Trixie. "You are not wrong about her, however, and she is having a difficult time herself." She defended, looking upon them from a distance. Trixie looked as well and while Celestia led her away far enough to keep Twilight's conversation with the upset family private.

Trixie Lulamoon looked at the inaudible argument going on. Glancing between them, she saw ashamed looks that Twilight was giving and what looks like the argumentative actions by Applejack, who was now poking Twilight in a harsh manner. She looked back at Princess Celestia with a furrowed brow and a perplexed expression. Celestia, who had been observing the events from a distance, met Trixie's gaze with a mix of understanding and sadness.

"Your m-majesty, Trixie doesn't understand. Why aren't you defending Twilight? She did what she was supposed to...I think?" Trixie asked, unsure if there was anything else she could have done.

Princess Celestia sighed, her regal demeanor softened by the weight of the situation.

"She did, and I believe if I was in Twilight's hooves, I too would have made the "wrong decision", whatever this may have been. From hearing the reports from my guards and from my sister, there was nothing else Twilight could have done in that situation. It seems that in Telsona's game, the only winning move was not to play."

"Then why?" Trixie asked. "That doesn't explain why you're letting her get spoken to like that."

"Trixie, I understand if my decisions are not always easy to understand, but unfortunately neither is a broken heart. I love my student, but Twilight is not the only one going through a difficult time, and while I already attempted to reach an understanding with Granny Smith and her grandfoals, I can't mend their trust so simply. Their feelings are just as valid as my student's, and they are "stubborn" as you had said. They are all learning a lesson that goes beyond the immediate consequences of their actions."

Trixie was still visibly upset as she couldn't accept this answer. With a head tilted in confusion and a brow scrunched, she spoke once more

"They don't need a lesson. Twilight doesn't need a lesson. Those ponies are blaming Twilight for what happened to Apple Bloom, but she's blaming herself even more! It wasn't even her fault." An inquisitive eyebrow raises from Celestia, who now looked down upon Trixie. "She never knew that I was awake, but...I heard all the things she was writing to you. She's not okay right now and she needs her friends. Can't you tell Applejack or her family to get over it, give Twilight something to work with? Anything?"

The Princess shook her head.

"Nothing that would help her nor or would change the Apple family's mind. It was the youngest of their family that was put in danger, and light above only knows what would be going through my heart and mind if I was in their situation. I am not sure I could be as rational if I knew Twilight's life was in jeopardy." Celestia revealed, furrowing her brow as her head seemed to tilt up.

Trixie's disappointment was palpable as she looked away for a moment, processing Celestia's words.

"But Twilight is your student, your friend! Shouldn't you stand by her no matter what?"

"She may still view herself as my student, and I as her teacher, but we stand as equals. Friendship is about more than just offering unconditional support. It's about helping each other grow. Twilight needs to understand the impact her decisions can have, even with the best intentions. I know that Applejack will forgive her, but the wound needs time to heal. Forcing this would only further drive the rift between them."

Trixie sighed with her frustration being obvious but before she could voice her concerns, Princess Celestia continued.

"I am here for her, Trixie, but I can't be here for the way that she wants me to be. From me, she is seeking an answer that can only come from herself. I can only be here in the way that she needs. I believe in Twilight's heart and she will still be a stronger pony today than she was yesterday. This wasn't an easy decision to come to, but I believe it is right and it is final." Celestia looked back toward the group. The Apple family appeared to be walking away with a few solar guards following them.

Twilight's face looked awful and positively full of regret after getting a dressing down from her friends. After a few short moments, Celestia recognized Twilight performing the breathing exercises that her niece loved to do so much.

Trixie Lulamoon looked back at Celestia, her eyes searching for reassurance.

"I hope you're right, your majesty...but right now, it just feels like she's facing this alone while nopony else is doing ANYTHING to help her." Trixie stomped a hoof down as she looked away from the Princess of the Sun in frustration.

"...You're right. What do you intend to do about it?" Celestia asked, prompting Trixie to look back up to her. Celestia gazed over her, with almost a dozen calculations seemingly running through her the Princess's mind. Her tone seemed to not be cruelly teasing Trixie, but asking for a genuine answer. "In Twilight's letters, she mentioned you by name. About needing you at that crucial moment. What would you say to her now? Tomorrow? If she needed you again, would you be willing to lend an ear to her? A shoulder to lean on? Could you be her island in turbulent seas?"

Trixie looked away from Celestia, pondering what Celestia was really asking. Twilight already had so many other friends who have been with her longer than her. Who have shared experiences that Trixie has only heard rumors of. What could she bring to the table that Twilight's many, many friends already couldn't?

Before Trixie could think of an answer to give to Celestia, she was suddenly distracted by heavy hoof steps trotting up.

"I'm sorry, that must have been strange to hear from me. It's just something to consider." Celestia whispered to Trixie, renewing a smile before turning back to the seemingly exhausted purple Alicorn walking up to them.

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***Twilight's POV***

After getting a few deep breaths in and using the calming technique that is starting to become my own, steeled my resolve and made my way out of the main hall to meet back up with Celestia and Trixie. I hope she wasn't being too harsh on Trixie. She can be a bit brash and haughty, but she's a good pony.

Celestia looked back at me, and her smile became brighter, putting me in a much better mood than a few minutes ago.

"Welcome back Twilight. How was your talk?" Celestia asked with as she turned. "Were you able to sort things out?"

"It wasn't easy, Princess Celestia, but they are preparing get supplies ready for the Life Party. They seemed adamant on getting things ready ahead of time, but I think they might need help with their next harvest."

"Is there anything else you spoke about with them?" Celestia asked after a short pause.

"Nothing too bad... it was just them getting things out of their system."

Celestia tilted her head in understanding as a frown appeared on her face.

"I see. I hope they weren't being too harsh on you." Celestia prayed, gentle shaking her head in sympathy. "They are having a rough time, and I am sorry that you both have to go through this."

it's not like it's undeserv-

"You're a good pony, Sparkle." A voice interrupted my thoughts. Turning toward Trixie, I saw what looked like gratitude? "Thank you for pardoning me after what I tried doing...and for doing your best to keep this town safe. You look like you were working really hard, and I think you need to start taking it easy on yourself."

Where was all that coming from?

"Well, yeah. It wasn't your fault..." I told her, before catching myself in a lie. "I mean, it kinda was, but you were under the influence of a dark artifact. What's important is that you learned your lesson, and you are a better pony in the future."

"I would also ask that you try remembering to address Twilight with her title in the future." Celestia denoted with a word of caution. "I don't like hearing my title often, but you shouldn't assume that every royal would..."dig" the casual attitude." Celestia said, using the modern slang she has been hearing lately. I saw Trixie wince after hearing Celestia say that, causing me to chuckle.

"It's okay. All my friends can just call me Twilight. I "dig" it." I said, winking at Celestia. Trixie upgraded from wincing to shaking her head due to the 1d4 psychic damage we both inflicted on her. "Its the bees knees!"

I get why Celestia did it. It feels wrong hearing an older pony use slang like that. I even as I had my own "Twilight Time" visitors give the same reaction when I used words like that. Once I realized Celestia was doing it on purpose, I started using outdated slang around younger ponies as well. Celestia taught me to "own our lame-ness" as she calls it.

She's so cool.

"That's groovy Twilight, but would that mean that no pony refers to you as Princess in this town?" Celestia counter. "More power to you if you're hip with that."

Trixie coughed as if to interrupt us, and taking the opportunity to shake herself out of the verbal stun-lock we put her in, Trixie continued talking. "But still, I could have come back again to Ponyville one day and tried something else, yet you still trusted me? Even before my apology?"

"What else could I do, stay mad at you forever?" I asked Trixie. It's like she thinks she's not deserving of forgiveness. "Everypony makes mistakes. I certainly did whe-" I stopped speaking once I reminded myself of why I was upset in the first place. What momentary respite I had in tormenting Trixie with outdated "lingo" earlier was now wiped away.

Of course you had to be the one that made mistakes when it mattered. Couldn't have been the chef oversalting his soup. You had to almost lose your home, and Celestia and Luna had to come and clean up your mess. You could handle everything else except a tiny incursion, one that Celestia could have easily dealt with if this was Canterlot, or if she was here. If it wasn't for Trixie and her "Edgar"...

I knew I was forgetting something, but I was dreading actually doing it. I swallowed hard...

"I... I’m so sorry, Princess Celestia. I tried to protect everypony, but I feel like... I failed. Without Edgar and Trixie... I just-" My voice faltered as I bowed my head toward my teacher.

"Must I tell you again not bow to me unless we are both greeting each other? You are a "Princess" Twilight, and a dear friend." Celestia gently scolded, trying to break me out of my old habits. "Please. Raise your head high and stand proud. You did your best."

"But my "best" wasn't enough." I did ask she asked and my eyes met Celestia's. Why didn't she look more upset with me? "I didn't learn anything from my friends getting hurt like this."

"And what would you have done differently, Twilight? Knowing what you know now?" My teacher asked me.

I didn't know. I still don't know, and that is what bothers me. How could I say I could keep them safe, that I learned from this if I didn't know where I went wrong in the first place.

Sensing I was struggling to find an answer, Princess Celestia started to walk away. As she walked, Celestia's horn glowed, soon a single log of charred timber came into view as it floated, its edge still glowing from the flames it was subjected to. If I had to make a guess, it came from under the oatmeal cauldron found in the kitchen, near the main hall. Alongside the serving dish with the oatmeal bowls Celestia was holding, it too floated besides the Solar Princess as she started to walk off.

"Come, walk with me. Both of you." She told Trixie and I. We both shared a glance and a nod, and followed Princess Celestia.

"Do you know how diamonds are made?" She asked.

I nodded, and started to explain.

"At very high pressures and temperatures, the carbon atoms from materials such as Charcoal or Graphite are squeezed so much that they start touching more atoms. When the pressure is about 50,000 times the pressure at the surface of Equestria-"I was almost done getting to the good part until Celestia stopped me with a hoof raised.

"I'm sorry Twilight. It was a rhetorical question. I know that you know how diamonds are formed, but I am glad that you are still as bright as ever. I'm sure you will never find yourself without a topic to speak with your future Colt-friend about." Celestia chuckled. "Yes, diamonds are formed under pressure, but never forget, they are not formed overnight."

"Is this going to be like one of those inspirational speeches you hear coaches give?" Trixie asked Celestia. "It's kinda Cliché."

"It's something like it, yes. I think you both could use an inspirational speech. You especially, Falling Star." Celestia said to Trixie, causing a blush to show up and shatter Trixie's prideful demeanor.

While a "Falling Star" was technically a drop-out from a Unicorn magic school, it didn't have many negative connotations. It just meant that you wanted to take a different path than what was typically expected of a Unicorn. Star Swirl the Bearded was long thought to be a drop-out who then pursued trying to create new spells for the sake of doing so. Spell to make you see different colors, spells to change your voice if you happen to sneeze so that it is a cute sneeze, and the infamous "Check-off" spell that can remind you of one thing you forget about when its most convenient to do so.

"Falling Star" students get their namesake from him. If true, this probably ended up being for the best since he was said always want to do things differently anyway, even if he couldn't explain why. Some extremely talented Unicorns end up dropping out just for a sort of "Pilgrimage" to follow his path and be one of "The Greats". He was so respected, even if he was supposedly said to be an oddball of sorts, just like Trixie I guess.

"You think I wouldn't notice, Miss Lulamoon? Of course I would. Both myself and my Luna would recognize Star Swirl's motif in your cape and pointed hat from the Moon. Did you know he was our own mentor?" Celestia dropped nonchalantly.

Both myself and Trixie looked at Celestia with peaked interests. Not much is known about Star Swirl the Bearded aside from autobiographies and history books. If this was another joke, Princess Celestia was keeping a really good poker face with her unwavering smile.

"Tis true. In the brief time we had together, he taught me nearly everything I've known about magic, and how to open my mind to the infinite possibilities of one's fate. All it takes is for you to see it...and make it manifest. It's amazing that he had much such a legend of himself despite being such a goofy old stallion."

"What was he like?" Trixie asked, tilting her magician's hat to get a better listen to the Alicorn we were following...gosh, how could I not put "two" and "two" together?

The cape, the hat, the cutie mark. It's like she was a walking stereotype of somepony who was trying to do things like Star Swirl while I was simply trying to figure out what was going on in his head when he made these spells.

"I must admit, even I don't know that much about his past. He loved bringing smiles and wonder to the faces of those that saw his magical marvels, but Star Swirl slowly drifted from bringing joy to the lives of other unicorn, as he though there were plenty of those that already did it better. Instead he turned his gaze to the stars to ask more and more of what his purpose was. Overtime, he started asking them more and more questions, and he started to get more and more answers. This... was his "side hobby", if you could believe it."

"His real hobby...Failing." Celestia revealed... anticlimactically. "Stumbling. Falling. Making an absolute ass of himself during either his magic lessons or his life lessons for us. He was such a bad influence on Luna and I. We would end up taking bad advice from him more often than good and get into trouble with our parents when they found out about the things we did. We were grounded so often and all our suitors were scared off within a date or two." Celestia giggled as she reminisced about her memories.

"Should you be talking about Star Swirl the Bearded like that?" Trixie asked, almost as if to defend the legend. Celestia looked at Trixie with a smile and a raised eyebrow before shaking her head.

"I wouldn't hold him too high on that pedestal, and he would appreciate the ego checks. He was extremely bashful when he was still around, and would probably spin in his grave if he saw how much ponies worshipped him after he passed. Then again, he wasn't bashful around my sister and I. I can not speak for Luna, but he was like a second father to me."

Wow, she really held him in high regard. Its like looking into a mirror of how much I have come to respect her.

"Throughout his life, all his lessons, all his failures, of which he bragged about many, he was still stayed himself. He was still "Star Swirl the Bearded". He had eyes that see lights in the sky, and magic in the air! Even if it was a rainy day that that forced him to hunker down inside, he saw a future where a beautiful tree was growing in an empty spot on a hill, and heard music in every raindrop pitter-pattering over the leaves and lakes. Even when I couldn't." Celestia's tone changed from one of happy memories to a more somber tone. "Even when I wasn't quite myself at times..."

"You are not the only one who believes they have made mistakes, Twilight. In my life, there were those that I failed to lead...failed to protect. Nothing compared to the night I had banished my sister to the moon." Celestia stopped to look out the window, as if seeing ghosts of the past. In her magical grip, the burnt wood she still held started to crack and compress, with a massive heat emanating from that orb of pressure. "Every night after I failed her, I had a new epiphany. Where all at once I could see every domino fall that led to the harm of another. Every mistake that I made which culminated to that instance, and I grew angry. I felt nothing but pressure upon my shoulders. I felt frustration and sorrow, and rage. That because of my failings, because of my past mistakes, I felt as if I was not fit to lead." The orb grew smaller, and smaller, and almost impossibly small. I almost felt myself start to get sucked into the gravitational pull of the force she was placing on that single piece of log, if you could even call it that anymore.

"Princess Celestia...I don't understand. Is any of this supposed to make me feel better?" I asked, hoping that there was some lesson at the end of this.

The immense pressure Celestia applied to the orb faded, leaving behind a single remnant sparkling within.

"...And in my despair, Star Swirl came to my room one night and said something to me that changed my outlook. Would you like to know what he said?" Celestia asked as she closed her eyes. I wanted to know, but before I could ask, I found out that this was also a rhetorical question, with Celestia giving her answer.

""Celestia, did you know that it is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose? You should not mistake failing for weakness. That is simply life...""She said with a slight wheeze in her voice. She wasn't losing her voice, but rather it was as if she adopted another voice entirely for only those three sentences.

"In that moment, he said exactly the thing I needed to hear. It has been so long that I have almost forgotten what his voice sounded like, but I could never forget him saying that to me." Celestia turned around and met my stare, her gentle gaze washing over me. "Do you understand what I am telling you...Twilight?"

I heard the melody music again, and in each note of the invisible harmonics, I heard a year of Celestia's life and experience echo before me. My teacher conjured a sound-proof shield over her and I, clearly wanting the next words she said to stay private between us.

"Twilight Sparkle, my faithful student. You are not alone. You are never alone. I have sat in a throne just like you, having the same doubts about myself...Thinking how I shouldn't be leading these ponies. Doubting how I could protect them when I had so many noble souls leave for their eternal rest. These doubts still gnaw at me sometimes...but here I am...still leading Equestria...still weathering the storm...still doing my best to protect and care for all my little ponies..."

"Why then? How do you do it?"

"My reasons may be different than yours...everyone I have ever truly loved as a friend has eventually passed away. Your friends are still here, and they still love you. You think your bond with Applejack's family and Ponyville may be broken, but I believe with all my heart that deep down everypony still loves you as that bookish, extraordinary Unicorn from those years ago. They blame you, but they will come to understand." Celestia walked up and placed a reassuring hoof on shoulder, and it started to feel like everything is going to be alright.

"I will tell you my secret..." Celestia shared. "I will tell you why I am still leading after more than a thousand years.... Why I led my ponies when my sister was gone during those lonely years. Why I told Princess Cadenza to never give up on her love for Shining Armor, knowing that your brother may not share her longevity...Hope. Hope that one day, when I leave this world, I want to see the smile of everypony that lost their lives for my dream, but they will not be smiling at me. Hope, that instead, I shall be smiling with them, as we look upon the world we leave to you and your children. Hope that you, and all your friends and family will inherit the land from us, a better place than whence we were born into it. A more peaceful place."

"Celestia..." I couldn't get much more out apart from her name as my voice was caught in my throat. I don't think she has ever opened up to me like this. Celestia shook her head.

"I am sorry if this may have been too much to hear from me. I am not sure why I felt the need to lecture you of this of that so suddenly, but I am glad that I did. I feel a weight off my chest now." A gentle smile crept on her face as she looked toward the direction she was originally going. "I will need to get back to my sister and our guest. Is there anything else you would like to talk about? I will make time for you, but I don't want to keep you from your own responsibilities..."

"...I have things I need to get to as well, but I will let you know if I need you." I told it. It wasn't a lie, but while I do want to talk with her more, it would be selfish of me to burden her with my problems when she has so much other things to do. I turn to walk away, waiting for Celestia to drop her shield.

"...Very well. I will let you see to it. And Twilight...?" I was about to turn around before I myself fall onto my rump with the same gravitational magic she demonstrated on the log, though it felt gentle. I felt Celestia's strong embrace from behind, as her hooves and wings completely cocooned me as she let her head rest off the side of mine. It was mighty, yet I felt completely safe in her soft cage. "I don't want you to forget. You are my diamond, and I will always have faith in you, my dear Twilight Sparkle. Know that much may happen here in the coming weeks...months...years, but above all, do not forget this - you may trust in me. You may trust in Luna. You may trust in Cadenza. You may trust in your friends and family. You may even trust in the Apples, regardless if you think you've lost them. We cradle each other's lives, and what threatens one of us, threatens us all." I felt shudder from my teacher, but it was small. Like she was trying to hid the rumble of this tremor. "...And if you find you can no longer trust in me, trust in the lessons you have learned. Trust in yourself. Never doubt what you have accomplished. All your decisions have brought you to this point. You have saved Equestria and taught us more about friendship than I myself have learned in the many centuries I have been alive. I believe that you will shine brighter and more spectacular than all of us."

As if my body was moving on its own, I hugged one of the forelegs that surrounded me. I felt like an oversized teddy bear or filly in her grasp as I tried to stifle my own voice and beating heart. With courage that I thought I was missing until now I spoke out.

"You're afraid..." I realized, as I felt a tear land on one of my hooves. She is scared of something, and has been worried the entire time I was speaking with her.

"...Of course I am. I am afraid for you, as I always have been." Celestia gingerly took one of my hooves and held it face up before depositing what appeared to be the compressed log into my hoof. As the magic was released, I saw ashes start to drift away from us and out both the shield and the Window we were next to. A purple, star-shaped diamond no bigger than a blueberry, which was once previously hidden by the ash shown brightly in my hooves as it reflected Celestia's magic. "Such an small thing...so unassuming. Not many would notice upon first glance that it was so spectacular, so strong, so beautiful, but I did..." Celestia smiled before turning her head back to me, her eyes slightly shinier than before. "I think I shall name this one..."Twilight". Would you keep her safe for me?"

"...Y-...Y-yes." I promised, feeling a tear start to flow down my face myself...only it wasn't the tear of sorrow that I felt, but one of joy. That one could have so much faith in me when I couldn't feel it. I am so fortunate to have met Princess Celestia. She was more than a teacher to me, but a motherly figure that I knew I could always rely on. How could she ever think I wouldn't trust her.

After a few more minutes of enjoying the moment I had with my teacher, I felt a gentle glow begin to tidy me up. No longer were my eyes or heart feeling strained, and when I looked toward Celestia, she looked no worse for wear than when I first met with her this morning. The music has since died down and was inaudible, and Celestia's shield was dropped...

"Finally!" an exasperated voice came. Trixie Lulamoon was standing in the same spot she has been. "Twilight, if I had a pocket watch, I would be looking at it really condescendingly right now. "

"What is the matter, Trixie?" I asked with an annoyed tone, judging the mare who seemed to be tapping a hoof impatiently.

"Trixie been standing here for twenty minutes! It felt like really long time! Trixie thought it was going to be a cute moment between you two, but then your shield went up and I couldn't see or hear what was going on the entire time. I was standing staring at your bubble like a creeper by all the guards that were patrolling!" She huffed and whined with puffed-up cheeks.

"I am sorry that we neglected you?" Celestia apologized, unsure of what it was she should have been apologizing for. " Couldn't you have wandered my student's castle or gone outside? Why wait here?" Princess Celestia asked as she was clearly confused by Trixie's motives. Suddenly, thanks to Star Swirl's "Check-off" spell that was reminded of, I was reminded of the first reason we came to find Celestia in the first place.

"Princess Celestia, is Edgar okay?" I asked. I heard Trixie sigh as the question was finally asked.

"Edgar is just fine. He is likely talking to my sister about all the wonderful things in his home. I admit that I feel some remorse that you can't hear more of his stories quite yet, but I think you may have plenty of time to speak with him more, Twilight." She reassured.

"So he is answering all your questions like you wanted, right?" Trixie asked warily. "Princess Luna asked me a lot of questions, but some of them didn't make any sense."

Celestia closed her eyes, as if thinking of a way to phrase it for the both of us.

"Yes and no. Your friend is not making it easy. He has been getting distracted and changing the subject often. For any topic he sticks with, he appears to be trying to keep his explanations as short as possible. In times like these, I almost wish I could cast some sort of "Truth spell" on either him or you simply to assuage my doubts and ask the questions I want."

Trixie snorted with relief.

"Fat chance. If such as spell actually existed, Trixie would not have wasted soooo~ much time trying to find out if stallions actually liked her or not in her teen years." Trixie mocked the idea of such a spell existing, and I don't blame her. There has not been a successful attempt at a Truth Spell since the idea first came up.

"...I could certainly think of some uses of this spell, and I have studied and looked but have found nothing that I would consider acceptable. Any Unicorn that attempted to make a spell like this only ended up controlling their target however briefly. They would simply tell you what they think you would want to hear, regardless of if it was true or a lie. There were many trials I had to preside over where I had to immediately let the accused go when I find out somepony tried to force the truth out of them."

"Even if they were actually guilty?" Trixie questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Especially if you think they were guilty." Celestia corrected, carefully choosing her words. "It is more important that innocence should be protected, than it is that the guilty should be punished. We want to live in a world where we will protect the innocent, for if innocence can not protect you from punishment, what reason would a pony have to do what's right? We want to live in a world where the virtues of harmony are rewarded, not punished." Celestia looked back at Twilight, deep in thought as her smile seemed to falter ever so-slightly, before snapping herself out of it. "My sister and Edgar are probably wondering where I have been all this time. I should probably get back to them. Please take care of yourselves." Celestia said as gave one more quick hug to me before turning away and carrying the serving tray of oatmeal back to the tea parlor.

Upon hearing this from her, I felt a calling to try and stop her in her tracks. To ask that Edgar not stay in that glass cage for now. At the very least, explain to him why we thought it was necessary. I started to think about how confused he may have been, and he deserved an actual answer, even if we were asked to keep this secret. Why "punish" him by building that glass box in the first place if we weren't even sure he was responsible for the melody magic. Not even Trixie knows fully why we did it, or why the box was designed the way it was. If he was causing it, the box was mainly to try and filter the Melody magic and keep it confined to the area around him. To not have it affect the ponies here as much as it we thought it was, but I am not entirely sure it was his fault.

Before I found the courage to ask Celestia about it, she turned the corner and was out of sight. I heard a nagging voice from my immediate right.

"Trixie can't help but feel left out. Why couldn't the Great and Powerful Trixie get a Princess hug as well? We helped save Ponyville." She argued. It was a moot point now that Celestia was gone, but did she have to wait until after she left? If she just asked, I bet Celestia would have done so without any issue as long as Trixie didn't make it weird.

Then again, does she really deserrrrrve one from Celestia?

"Yes, but you also forced Snips and Snails to drag you around on a chariot with no wheels when you enslaved Ponyville." I countered, knowing that there were far more ridiculous examples than that.

"Sparkle, you can't be taking their side! They brought an Ursa Major to your town."

"Ursa Minor." I corrected. I shook my head. "Do you want me to hug you. Would that make you feel better?"

"Its not the same." Trixie sighed in disappointment. "Perhaps when we become better friends, but Trixie wants one from the cream of the crop!"

"This mare is insatiable. Will nothing make her happy?"

"Like one of Fluttershy's hugs? They are the best." I assured, knowing she always gave the best hugs. Not too soft, not too hard, but way too comfortable. She could give Mrs. Huggin Kiss, the town therapist, a run for her money.

"Who?" A confused voice asked. Looking back at Trixie, I thought she was first trying to mess with me, but its like she legitimately forgot about the element of Kindness that risked infection to help Edgar.

Oh my GOSH, its only been a day!

Before I could get too annoyed, I heard a sound. It was like a like a quiet buzz.

.
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*ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZIP*

I heard a buzz getting louder and louder before an "EEP" came from the direction of Trixie, using her magic to try and hold her hat onto her head. Trixie then took it off her head to peak in to see what slipped insi-

"You gotta come quick!" A high pitched but miniscule sounding voice came from the hat. Though it was mostly cotton, the shape of the hat still acted almost like a microphone. A head poked out of it, showing that breezy from yesterday.

"Delphi?"

"Ay lass. We flew off sometime in the weee-morning when the drunkard was first captured by you and Nightmare Moon. We hid in mountains of oats an' apples, we swam in a bowl of milk to evade detection. You all are brutes with how you all throw around your oats, but that's not important." She was explaining, before getting interrupted.

"Holy crap, Trixie has completely forgotten about you! You were in my hat the entire time last night? Trixie could have squished you on accident!" Trixie exclaimed in fear, thinking about all the times she might have scratched her head the entire day, or tossed and turned while trying to go to sleep.

Delphi darted up to Trixie's eye, grabbing her attention and making herself obnoxiously obvious.

"FOCUS!!!! You have to save your hero!" Not satisfied with her tone not reaching Trixie, then flew up to Trixie's ear and held it open, yelling right into it. "Nightmare Moon is trying to eat him!!!" She shouted in desperation. Trixie winced and involuntarily shook her head at the weird feeling, suddenly causing Delphi to lose her grip and be flung right back into Trixie's hat with a tiny yell.

After Trixie gave an uncomfortable shudder from that weird sensation, she and I looked at each other before looking back to her hat, as two tiny hooves caught the inner rim and crawled out.

"What?" We both said in Unison.

Author's Note

Not yet Proof-read.

So it turns out while editing my other chapter, I just kept writing and writing, so I felt as if I needed to split the chapter once more.

Instead of this being chapter 2/2, it will instead be chapter 2/3. I am doing this since I want you guys to be in the same-ish state of mind as you read this, but I also don't want this portion of the story to drone on-and-on-and-on with some chapters being 40,000 words. Probably better to do shorter chapters that I can push out quicker.

Don't be afraid to let me know if its a bit boring or if I am any plot holes that I can use magic to explain away, inconsistencies, or grammatical errors. If there is any criticism, I would like to hear it, even if I don't act upon it in my story. The final chapter of this set of three should be coming out relatively soon. If you don't wanna leave a comment with your criticism, send me a message and call me a wienerbiscut. It could be anything, including my inconsistency in either including a space in Apple Bloom's name, or not including a space in Applebloom's name.

Chapter Nine: Introductions, Interrogations, they both start with an "I" - 3/3
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Nine: Introductions, Interrogations, they both start with an "I" - 3/3

“It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.”
― Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy

***Third person POV***
**Gotham city construction site**

"...but the Joker can't win. Gotham City needed its true hero..." Batman's gravely voice said to Gordon, as he turned the scarred side of his former friend's face away...showing the hero that Harvey Dent once was...Not the monster, but the man.

Gordon came to a sudden realization, looking upon his friend with anger. How could he suggest such a thing???

"No, you can't! You're not!" He refused to believe what Batman was suggesting, before a radio was shoved into the police commissioner's hands.

The midnight blue Alicorn stood at the ground level, drinking her coffee and watching them from a distance as she sat there as awaiting the next portion of the story with baited breath...

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***wait....nevermind, it is still Edgar's POV***
**Tea parlor of Twilight's Castle**

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Princess Luna was at the edge of her seat, wide-eyes that were gargantuan with worry and wonder as she tightly squished one of the cushions she hugged against her, completely immersed. She was mid sip of the "no maidens..."coffee mug she was holding next to her until she gulped, her mouth suddenly dropping as it seems like she realized exactly what was coming next.

"He wouldn't...He couldn't.." Luna murmured, looking away from me in thought. I saw a nod from her, and before long she seemingly coming to a realization and turning back toward me with a determined look."...No, he would..."

"His old friend's words echoed in his mind. "You would either die a hero or live to see yourself become the villain", so he decided to become a villain in the eyes of the city he loved for the greater good. To protect the memory of his broken friend and keep the thousands of criminals off the streets...To protect the city from the truest evils." Even as I was telling the story, I felt the same shiver I felt when I first heard about this speech in theaters. "Because he wasn't a hero. He would be the one who actually killed those villains, not his friend...Because sometimes, the truth isn't good enough... sometimes, people deserve more..."

As I was finishing up telling the story of The Dark Knight as an abridged script to Princess Luna, I saw that she started to look a bit more fuzzy, only to now realize that her fur was starting to stand up on its ends in excitement as she was awaiting the climax of this story, with a barely contained grin beaming right at me.

There it is! I got her hook, line, and sinker!

"He was the hero Gotham deserves...but not the one it needs right now." I whipped my head toward Luna's direction with a deathly serious tone and raised eyebrows "So they hunted him! Because he can could take it. And they would never catch this Ghost of Gotham, because he was their silent guardian..." I started to say the ending before I was interrupted by Luna, who had what looked like another epiphany.

"Their watchful protector...Their Dark Knight!"

"The end!" I smiled, cheering internally as I saw her reaction to the ending.

"HUZZAH! What a riveting tale!" Luna giggled as she clapped her hooves together, giddy in excitement.

"You liked it that much?" I asked her, kinda already knowing the answer. I knew that sometime while I was on Equestria, I wanted to tell Princess Luna about batman since it seemed right up her alley. I was also debating about telling her about a bunch of other stories about "dark heroes", but above all else I wanted to get a "Batman" out of the way before anything else.

I'm actually debating whether or not I want to to tell her about an edgy vampire called Alucard that I started to grow fond of while watching an Anime called "Hellsing Ultimate", but I have yet to see anything truly heroic about him yet. Then again, I never got the chance to finish it since was only about three episodes in before I found myself in Equestria on my drive home. I was sticking with the show just to see if he actually fights Dracula, but...

Luna interrupted my train of thought.

"Of course we did! Many fall in the face of chaos; but not Batman! Not this hero, who was armed with nothing other than his mind, body, and unbreakable determination!"

...and a mansion and a butler and a gazillion dollars and Plot armor and...

"He's not a hero, remember? He's just doing what he felt was right."

Luna shook her head in disagreement, and almost seemed to take offense to me besmirching Batman's achievements.

"Tis a lie! Is that not what makes a true hero is on your world? Meddling regardless of whether or not those believe he was needed? The noble sacrifice of his reputation for the greater good? Nay, he is a hero, regardless of what he thought of himself! He lives with the tragedy of what happened to his parents every day, but not in the way we could have expected. He took his tragedy to turn it into something special. Helping Ponies in his city every day to protect them from the tragedy he had experienced! In the eye of the storm that wicked Jester had brought upon his home and the corruption that befell his friend, his valor shined brightest against a backdrop of despair! He was an incorruptible monument...like our sister!"

I was in disbelief.

"Really? You see similarities between Batman and your sister? Batman...and Princess Celestia. Nobody else comes to mind?"

"Who else could I compare to this stalwart guardian. Thee?" Luna asked as she tilted her head in confusion. "Thou art a hero too, but we have yet to witness thou prance about in costume. Still, "Tis not who thou art underneath thine mask, but what thou dost achieve that defines you!"" Luna quoted, or tried to quote as best as she could. Suddenly, a flash of inspiration appeared from her smile. "Perhaps thou could consider staying for Nightmare Night. You may come as the Dark Knight thou hast regaled us with! Wouldn't this be splendid?" She beamed at me, suddenly leaning in toward and over me, awaiting my answer.

It is clear that none of these ponies have any concept of a personal bubble, as she was close enough for me to once again feel her hot breath close to me. It smelled fresh and fruity, which is kinda weird since I know she had been drinking black coffee during the entire time I've been in this room. I thought coffee breath was supposed to stink, or at the very least smell like coffee. Before I could place what the smell was, we were interrupted from a voice in the room.

"Ahem." came a voice from behind. Luna looked up and a blush immediately manifested on her face. "Luna, what am I to think of this? What have we stumbled into?" Said the regal voice that I recognized as Celestia. I looked behind my spot and saw her standing in the door way, with a serving tray containing three bowls of what looks like light-brown industrial sludge garnished with apple slices on top. At least, I hope it is that and not oatmeal. I never liked oatmeal. It's gross.

"Thou hath stumbled upon nothing, you nosy ninny! Edgar, tell her!" Princess Luna commanded, expecting me to defend her virtues. She was right.

"Nothing happened?" I testified unsurely. "Also, that was way longer than a few minutes. I literally told two whole Batman stories."

"Why dost thou specify a specific number? There is MORE to his tale?" Luna inquired, excited over the possibilities that the boy billionaire would get into.

"Bat...man?" Celestia asked with a raised eyebrow, like an older person who just heard about what an CD-ROM or ASCII was.

"Yea. Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist Bruce Wayne, who is also a crime fighting detective by night! There are plenty of comic books about him, but of the story I was telling Princess Luna about, there should be one more story connected to the last one." I explained, glancing over to Luna to see her reacti-aaaaand she's positively beaming again.

Celestia did not really seem as enthused.

"...That sounds very interesting, Edgar, but it seems to be more of an acquired taste for me. I'm sure that there is a very good explanation as to how all of those circumstances have occurred in a sensible manner in your story." Celestia remarked as she walked past my couch and set the tray on the coffee table. Honestly, I don't blame her for doubting, since you can make a lot of stories sound silly if you don't have enough context. "I am sorry that I was gone for so long. I was preoccupied and lost track of the time. I suppose it is now a "brunch". Do not worry, the oatmeal is still very warm. It was freshly made and I made sure to keep it warm."

God...Damn it. Why does oatmeal exist? It is the Jared Leto of all breakfast foods. Easily the worst thing of any pantry it's in.

"It's made from oats, which is a grain here in our world." Celestia reassured.

"I know what oatmeal is. I was never really a fan of it. I had it forced on me as a kid when there was perfectly good cereal Cookie Crisps or Lucky Charms in the cupboards, so it was always a mood breaker for me. I don't even like Oatmeal Cookies."

Celestia shook her head as she used her magic to slide the bowl closer to me.

"Beggars can't be choosers, Edgar. Oats are standard in our food stores. When stored properly, they can last close to a decade without going bad. We always have an ample supply of this for emergencies, along with other foods and water. I think you should try it Edgar. I am sure you'll like it." Celestia encouraged, trying to convince me. "The apple slices on top are courtesy of the Apple Family. The grandmother of the filly you were found with really wanted you to have this bowl. When she found out who I was bringing this to, she was adamant about making it herself. She downright wrestled the ladle out of one of the chefs to add it to the bowl herself, along with, and I quote, "A spoonful-ah-sugah, spices, and her very favorite apple slices." Celestia drawled in a slight southern accent. There was no mockery in her tone, but you could tell she was mimicking Granny Smith's way of speaking. "We couldn't stand in her way." She chuckled.

Looking again and prodding it experimentally with a wooden spoon that came with the bowl, I can barely see tiny pieces of green apple shavings mixed into the oatmeal. This would probably bring more of an apple-y flavor out than the three apple slices garnishing the top of the oatmeal. Even the full apple slices on this one looked as if were browned with what I assume is cinnamon and brown sugar. I took an experimental bite of the oatmeal along with a spoonful of apple on top.

...It's delicious!

It was sweet, and gooey, and reminded me more of an inside-out apple pie than the semi-solid "gross" that I was expecting. Granny Smith couldn't have done that much to the bowl. Maybe it was knowing that she had a hand in it? With renewed morale, I started eating with renewed vigor. Both Celestia and Luna joined me in breakfast, albeit a bit more reserved and regal even in eating. After the first two bites, I realized that I was probably eating like a caveman in front of them, so I slowed down and tried to match both the pace and decorum they showed while eating.

"Thank you. I was practically dying."

Celestia did not respond apart from her nod of acknowledgement, and after she swallowed, she spoke again. "I bumped into Princess Twilight Sparkle on my way back here."

Luna's ears perked up. "Pray thee, she is well?" Luna asked.

Celestia chewed for a bit longer with this question, eyes closed, before swallowing once more. "She was clearly tired from yesterday's and last night's events." Celestia answered, probably referring to both the invasion, and either her one million questions to me or her slumber party. "She has also had some difficult conversations with some friends. She seems very stressed...and may require our guidance in the future."

"I see." Luna nodded along in contemplation. It was almost as if they were having their own conversations under the conversation.

Celestia ears raised as if she just remembered something. "Oh, she was with Trixie Lulamoon, and they were both asking about our guest. I trust you aren't harassing Edgar too much, Luna?"

"We haven't even touched him! Edgar, tell her!" Luna commanded once more. That was a lie, since she was being super reassuring a bit before my story about Batman. Grabbing my hands and wiping my face to clear up the not-tears from my face. But I did as she asked and lied, not exactly wanting to give Celestia more ammo to harass her sister.

"It's true. Touching royalty was the kind of stuff was punishable by death in different nations in my world. I probably would have stopped Luna long before something like that happened."

"Ah, I suppose our worlds aren't that different then, are they? I am glad nothing happened." Celestia nonchalantly weighed in, finishing up the remainder of her bowl of oatmeal with a smile as the room was put into a deafening silence from the implications. I was stuck wondering what "counted" as touching. Was it just the lewd stuff like, or was it as something as simple as Luna poking me or grabbing my hands like she did earlier.

Princess Luna, still sitting at my side, started to finish up her oatmeal as well as she kept quiet. I am not liking the vibes. I felt an urge to clear my throat, but resisted since that cliché act might raise questions.

"...So why were Trixie and Twilight asking about me?" I inquired, quickly changing the subject.

"They simply wanted to know that you were okay." She remarked, placing her now-empty bowl onto the silver serving tray, which confused me at first. She took less bites and ate slower than me, how did she already finish hers? "You seem to be quite a hot topic around here as of late, even considering your encounter yesterday. I know that they both had more questions about you that they didn't voice. I suspect that they will try to more than make up for it after our discussion." She revealed, causing an uneasy feeling to bubble up from my stomach.

"Great. More questions." I grumbled, massaging the bridge of my nose. I just know that this is headache was just going to get worse, I could feel it.

As if sensing my dissent, Celestia continued carrying the conversation as Luna appeared to be oddly quiet. "Why do you look upset, Edgar? Twilight seemed excited about you when she spoke about you in her letter. Judging from all the notes she has written about you, your traits, and your personality, you were both clearly busy last night."

"I barely survived." I grumbled about. "She was practically talking my ear off. I was happy to talk, but god, she just kept going and going! I thought see was going to ask more substantial questions, but everything she asked brought up more questions! And not even what I would consider interesting ones. She also kept hyper-focusing on so many uninteresting things! "How did the Pandas manage their "Panda Express" delivery service?" and "Does your hide change color for camouflage?"." I shuddered. Thank God she ran out of paper. I seen the memes about her, but I think she might actually be slightly autistic.

"...Thank you for indulging her curiosity. She can be overly-enthusiastic, but she needs the distraction." Celestia showed gratitude with a head bow, catching me off-guard.

Oh...wasn't expecting that.

"You're welcome, I guess? I mean...it was really wasn't that bad. If it made her day a little better, I would probably sit through it again, though." Taking a sip from my teacup, I couldn't help but think about how every other pony was handling this. "Is everyone else okay? It doesn't look like battles are an everyday occurrence here in Ponyville." I asked. I know that I have been putting up a bit of an act so far, but I really am concerned about them. I seen a few fan-fictions that were 18+ that tried doing their best to try and copy HBO and put their characters through extremely stressful situations, but those characters only acted as they were written. I never imagined...no, that's a lie. I did imagine myself in situations with them every now and then when I was bored. It never really amounted to anything other than "what if I was in Dark Souls, but AppleJack was a companion" and other daydreams like that. I never really considered them real with real thoughts until I ran into Trixie the other day. I hope these ponies are doing alright.

Celestia nodded. "You are correct. She not the only one who needs the distraction, as this town is reeling from this "Queen Telsona". Upon arriving, it is clear that they are afraid and understandably gloomy about the events that took place, even if they tried to hide it around us."

"If thou art curious, we have a spell in mind that should help with this, but it is merely a balm before the true treatment."

"Spell?" I asked, turning back toward Princess Luna.

"Indeed. There isn't a good name for it yet, but it is a derivative of one that our niece and nephew-in-law improvised during the battle of their wedding. We had performed this spell to a lesser extent upon our arrival yesterday to inspire Ponyville and to rid ourselves of any changelings left in Ponyville. It wanes as it expands, but we are sure that it would be more than enough once we put our combined strength towards it." Luna stated flatly, triggering a bit of a light-bulb in my head.

"...Did it look like a shiny blue bubble that kept pulsing out?" I asked, being reminded of the Patronus-looking thing that rocked the fuck out of Telsona.

Luna's nodded, confirming that it was indeed her. "So thou hath witnessed it?"

"Yeah, I noticed. It was a bit hard to ignore since it saved me more than once..." My eyes widening upon that realization. Wow, I really did cut it close, didn't I? I should not have lived through that situation, and I have Luna to thank for it. "Thank you, by the way. You saved my life more than once now." I bowed my head to her, trying to be as sincere as possible.

Luna answered with a small smile, before clearing her throat and continuing. "We will require multiple magic users for this spell, including Twilight and our niece's help for this. With this caveat Twilight will need some rest before we attempt it. "Hopefully casting it will give us time to keep spirits up before the Life party."

"Life party?" I asked with a wince, getting flashbacks to the Star Wars Christmas Special that I sat through out of morbid curiosity.

Questions questions, too many questions. I can't help but feel bad about giving Twilight grief about that now. I thought the show was simple enough to understand given that it was a children's show, but I have been learning more and more about this place every single day. It's starting to make my head hurt.

"Yes, it is a funerary tradition. Shortly after one is laid to rest, we celebrate them." Celestia illustrated.

Now that was a bit confusing to me. "You guys would throw a party right after a battle? Where people die? I don't know, that seems kinda disrespectful."

Celestia raised her eyebrows, seemingly just as confused as I was from my query. "Disrespectful? Could you explain, Edgar? Does your kind not have funerals or burial rites?"

"We do but...I mean they died, right? Why celebrate that?" I explained my confusion, still not quite picking up what she's putting down.

As if she was starting to have a better understanding of my gripes, Celestia looked toward the ceiling in curiosity."...I think I see your confusion. We don't celebrate at the funeral. It is a sad state of affairs when a pony you hold dear passes away. But when you die, would you rather your loved ones cry and mourn over what once was? Or would you perhaps rather they smile and remember the joyous times they had with you. We are not celebrating their deaths, but the life they led up to that point. It can be difficult at times, but it helps us move on with pleasant memories."

"So its like, "don’t cry because it’s over, and smile because it happened?"" I quoted Dr. Seuss, thinking I get the gist of what they were saying. I never liked funerals back home. I never felt good after going to one, knowing it was going to be the last time I saw one of my aunts or grand parents. Celestia looked down from the ceiling to meet my gaze and had the other eyebrow raise alongside the first eyebrow. It looks like her apparent skepticism changed to a welcome surprise.

"Yes, Edgar. An apt choice of words. If these do not exist where you are from, perhaps you should try it one day. It may help knowing that when your loved ones look down upon you, that you are doing fine." Celestia's mood seemed to take a more gentle tone as she spoke of this topic. So far, her tonal shift has been a welcome improvement, but she seemed to be thinking of other things as she was acting more civil to me. "Death" must be a touchy subject around her, given the tact and respect she was showing when talking about it.

"Ponyville won't forget what happened here, nor should they, but this will help them come to terms and accept that what happened. They will not relive the terrors in their dreams, and their hope will not abandon them." Luna said a frown...which was morphing into something more and more menacing. Truthfully, this shift was beginning to frighten me as it appeared to come out of nowhere. It was almost as if both Luna and Celestia swapped bodies.

"A-are you okay Luna? It wasn't something I said, was it?" I asked, feeling my heart rate start to rise. I started to feel an onset of a migraine happening, and it was beginning to get very annoying. "I am sorry if I insulted your traditions. I just never hea-"

"You are fine for now, Edgar, but I ask that you silence yourself for a moment." Celestia herself started to gain a frown as well, before closing her eyes and concentrating hard. Her horn began to pulse, glowing and dimming as her own ears twitched. "Did you sense them too, Luna?"

"Yes...we have uninvited guests. We can't tell who they are, since they appear to be trying to mask their presence with a muffling spell. Whomever had cast this spell must be quite powerful indeed. We almost couldn't feel it."

"Do you think your wards failed?" Celestia asked bemused.

"No."

"Is there something I need to know about?" I asked them, worried that it was Telsona coming back for revenge.

"Not particularly... and no Edgar, it isn't Changelings." Celestia clarified as her horn started to glow. As their horns glowed, they seemed to have another silent conversation before Luna stood up.

"They are somewhere above us." As she spoke, a dark miasma surrounded Luna as her body looked as if she was sinking into her own shadow. We shall go pay them a visit." And with that last declaration, she phased into the floor. While that seemed counter productive, considering that she is presumably looking for the intruders upstairs, she looked cool as hell doing it. Still, I wonder if any ponies below us saw anything.

It would be weird to imagine a butt with legs starting to float down from the ceiling.

Celestia was still looking at the spot before she closed her eyes and shook her head. "Show-off. She could have just walked out the door." she chuckled to herself.

"So could you..." I remarked, remembering her disappearing into a cloud of glitter.

The smile on Celestia's face started to falter before turning back toward me. "I teleported because I hardly get to stretch my wings and work my magic for anything other than raising and lowering the sun. Luna on the other hoof seemed to be doing it because she did not want to be outshined in front of you...why is that, do you wonder?"

***Luna's POV, third person.***
**A storeroom in Twilight's castle, above the tea parlor*
*Mid-Day*

As Luna quietly lurked in the shadows of the room above Edgar and Celestia, she couldn't help but wonder how both she and her sister could let whatever this was slip by their watch. While Twilight and her friends were looking after the anomaly known as Edgar, she and the other guard unicorns used almost every sentry ward in the book to secure Ponyville and the area surrounding it. If there was a flock of geese migrating, she would know. If there are ponies coming back from a camping trip, she would know. If a tree fell in the Everfree and nopony was around to hear it, she would know if it made a sound or not. Nothing could have crossed any of the wards she placed, so it is certainly not Changelings making another infiltration attempt so soon after their first incursion.

And it is not as if whomever was causing this magical disturbance just teleported into the castle. The amount of magic it would take to blast past our magical sentries would make so many "ripples" that would have had the entire castle in full alert immediately. This means that the intruders must have already been inside the castle at the start, and this worried Luna.

"Can you hear them yet? Anything?" came the voice of what sounds like a certain magician Luna spoke to earlier in the night. It is clear she was trying to speak quietly, but you could barely call her attempt at it a whisper.

Luna heard the familiar voice in a hushed tone behind some crates. "There they are..." she thought, and she made her way to the crates in the slowest and quietest manner possible, she caught bits and pieces of the back and forth conversation that was going on from the other side of the boxes.

"No, I can't get around it, and I don't think they are taking that spell down anytime soon." A voice that was unmistakably Twilight's said. "I certainly don't want to risk trying to pry my way in. They would notice it instantly."

"Do you think they knew we were planning on listening, Sparkle? We did a good enough job with muffling our trots with a spell, didn't we?"

"I don't think so. We can't hear what they are saying, but they obviously put up their own muffling spell was up before we even started trying to snoop on them... Uhhg, why did I let you talk me into this? This wasn't going to work!"

"Because you still owe us big time! Besides, this is your castle. You should be able to go wherever the hay you want! That's what Trixie would do if she had a castle. She certainly would not let her powers go to waste."

"She has a point, Lass." A faintly familiar third voice called out. "...where did she go?"

Luna peeked her head over the boxes to find what looked to be both Twilight Sparkle and Trixie Lulamoon looking toward a small beam of light emitting from a crack. Miss Trixie was in her normal attire, but her cape seemed to not be flowing freely, and was instead bound tighter to her body with what looks to be a cerulean-colored gossamer sash with star embroidery. Twilight herself was wearing...a black nylon body suit and a bandana?

The Princess of the Night had blinked and shook her head at the thought of such a ridiculous costume. Twilight always was one to try and do things by the book, and if sneaking around required a pelt-tight bodysuit, there was no talking her out of it. Luna thought it suited her form quite nicely, and without the added flair that she saw from Generosity's "fashion sense", Twilight must have made for herself.

"Still, that only makes two out of the three voices she heard. Where is the other one?" Luna thought to herself. Peering toward the middle of where they were staring, there appeared to be the bottom-half of a Breezy sticking half-way out of the floor. Possibly from a crack or a whole that hadn't been repaired.

"Where did who go? Did Princess Celestia leave?" Twilight asked in a nervous manner. She probably knew that what she was doing was wrong or sneaky, and she certainly did not want to be caught spying on her teacher. That being said, the trio seemed too distracted to even notice Princess Luna slowly creeping up to them in the dark store room.

"No...N-Nightmare Moon." A quiet but shaken voice said as the breezy tried pulling herself out of the hole. With a bit of struggle, she succeeded in doing so, falling back on the tile as the light beam from the hole grew wider in diameter.

"You can call her Princess Luna. She hasn't been "Nightmare Moon" since last Nightmare Night, and that is just for fun." Twilight clarified. Luna thought it was nice of her to try and clear her name and sweet talk the breezy, but it would certainly be a losing battle. They are horrified of Nightmare Moon over what she represents...Darkness. Absence of Light and the warm glow of the sun. Absence of the coming dawn in the darkest night.

"Trixie thought you were watching them the entire time. How could you miss her leaving? She is the second biggest pony in the castle, aside from Princess Celestia!" Trixie questioned in a hushed yell.

Luna's poor self esteem was wounded...

It is no lie that she is fairly large compared to most other ponies, and she has intimidated many in the past with her height and size. Even as she worked hard to diet and exercise to make sure she is of adequate and lithe proportions, an unfortunate fact remains that muscle weighs heavier than fat. With her muscles being dense due to her Alicorn body, she has found herself close to the same heft as the most portly of ponies, even if she is told that she wears it better than others. Celestia has told her to have pride in her body and other "desirable features", as she put it. With all that, it is still difficult for Luna to take her sister's words to heart. Not when she compares herself to her other Royal Family members. Not with all she's already done...

Princess Mi Amore Cadenza herself was known for her beauty, kindness, and grace. Try as she might, Luna could not help but feel insecure about her own personality compared to Cadance. How could a Princess of Darkness and Nightmares compare to the literal Princess of Love. Nightmare Moon destroys and corrupted, while Princess Cadance encourages creation and harmony. Her infectious personality helps her gets along with ponies so easily, as evidenced by all the couples that may sneak a letter to her for advice. She has shared quite a few stories during their meetings and always knew what to suggest to the young lovers. Cadance even landed the stallion of a lifetime within nearly no time at all once she met Twilight Sparkle's brother. They both look so happily married, and he isn't even the slightest bit interested in adding other mares to form a herd. She makes him happy enough as it is, and they would both make wonderful parents one day.

Celestia herself was positively gorgeous. Even amongst the four alicorns she was the one most sought after in most ponies dreams. It mattered not that the mare has two planets for an ass and sneaks cake during the night. It mattered not the mischievous streak she had when causing chaos during the Gala or pranking the castle staff during the day. One would argue that those are "features" to an already incredible mare that nopony could hold a candle to. She has a voice like honeyed-butter accompanied by an exquisite smile that could wipe away any fear and doubt. This coupled with her experience and confidence, she always knew what to say when somepony needed advice. She wasn't the best to come to when it came to "love" as that honor had already been claimed by Princess Cadence. No, her advice has the common sense that seemed absent from ponies in this time period, and she was persuasive. She had literally the perfect personality...it is no mystery as to why she found that the subjects of Equestria have had multitudes of more dreams involving Celestia than herself.

Even Twilight Sparkle, her sister's former student, now stands as an equal Princess of Equestria. She is a fellow princess who has earned the admiration and respect of ponies across Equestria. Princess Luna admits that she feels envious of Twilight's close daughter-like relationship with Celestia and her rapid rise to power and responsibility, but she has proven time and time again to be more than deserving of it. She somehow always finds a way to make everything alright in even the most dire circumstances. With all dilemmas seeming to turn out better than before in the end of any event they may find themselves involved in, as if Twilight Sparkle is the main character of her own book. But more than anything that Luna envies, it is how easily she forms everlasting bonds and friendships with those she meets.

It isn't quite as easy for a mare that ponies told Nightmare Night stories about for the past one thousand years to make many friends, or even a real conversation. It's not like the days before she was banished, where she was sought and desired.

The ponies of Equestria still have nightmares of her and the idea of her, after all. Her form was unknown for many a year, and these ponies were imaginative as to what monstrous features they had in their "head canon" for her. Though she was mostly powerless during her banishment, she still had a clear view of their dreams and nightmares during her time on the moon. They may play along and run around during Nightmare Night but she still catches the uneasy side glances of ponies that happen to see her outside of night time hours. The only ones that seem to alleviate Luna's loneliness in this regard apart from her fellow royals would have to be her stalwart Lunar guards(who were forced to interact with her at first), the foals and fillies she entertains once a year during said Nightmare Night, and the dreamers who don't know they could be speaking with the Princess Luna.

Has anypony really spoken with Luna apart from these ponies? Has anyone even spoken with Luna as a friend since her banishment, without it either being some requirement or falsehood of them not knowing it was her?

"... I only saw you as how you look right now. As the nice and gentle Princess that saved me a couple minutes ago. I promise, I would probably be the last person to judging you."

That's right... The creature known as "Edgar" didn't show the least bit of caution around her, even if he does speak before he thinks...

"Why would I automatically assume that you are evil? I just met you."

...

Perhaps Luna and her Sister may be going about things too harshly with him. He doesn't seem too bad.

"Ay must've blinked or somethin'. One minute she was there. Another, "Poof"." The high-pitch voice of the Breezy rationalized with shaky rattle.

Princess Luna shook herself from path her thoughts were taking, and refocused on her investigation. There was time for introspection later.

The great and powerful Trixie spoke after the silence became too much for her. "Where do you think Princess Luna could have gone?"

"Right behind you." Princess Luna growled.

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!" came the cacophony of terrified screams from the trio, stumbling over each other in a sea of chaos. Delphi, the Breezy suddenly zipped right back into Trixie's hat. Trixie was in the process of throwing a smoke bomb onto the ground, which was swiftly caught by Princess Luna's magic as it detonated into a fine compressed powder in the shape of the smoke bomb into her magical bubble. Twilight's reflexes were nothing short of phenomenal, as she quickly hoped over with flared wings and kept her horn primed at the ready.

In the back of her mind, Princess Luna was glad that Twilight was this skilled and has no doubt that she could have defended herself if it was any other unicorn or magic user on the caliber of Discord or even the Changeling Queen she had the nightmare about last night. But Princess Luna was not just any other magic user, and there are extreme advantages to the element of surprise. Princess Luna released her magical hold on the condensed smoke from Trixie's smoke bomb and flung it at Twilight's face, momentarily blinding her and throwing her focus off as Princess Luna finally wrangled her in her magic. In power, they may have been closely matched, but Twilight still had a few more decades to go before she could go up against Luna when she fights dirty.

In summary, the Trio was no match for Luna as she was able to predict all their moves and rendered them completely immobile in her magical grasp.

"Twilight Sparkle..." Luna growled in annoyance, greeting the purple Alicorn with the intention of letting loose the Royal Canterlot voice and scold her.

"Hip-KHOFF KHAK KHAK!" Before Twilight Sparkle could speak, she erupted in a coughing fit from the smoke, blue powder puffing out of her mouth. After a few short moments of Twilight's coughing and dry hacks, Twilight's breathing started to stabilize with her heaves starting to become less labored. "Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia-KHAK" Twilight strained out.

"What?" Luna asked, momentarily forgetting the verbal lashing she was going to give Twilight. This didn't sound like a cough, but some form of coherent sentence she was trying to get out.

"Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia! Also, you brought EXPLOSIVES!?!" Twilight wheezed, involuntarily turning toward Trixie as they both still floated and spun in the weightlessness of Luna's magic.

"They're simply smoke bombs, Sparkle. They are quite valuable for quick getaways!" The lopsided and upside-down Trixie justified as she kept trying to crane her neck to see Twilight. Her cape was just barely sweeping the floor as she held onto her Magician's hat to keep it on her head.

"That's not better! What if somepony thought there was a fire."

"The smoke is blue and fun, like myself. Nopony would think "danger" when they see it, they'll think of the greatest magician in Equestria."

"Unless they thought it was smoke from a chemical spill or the experiments I run!"

It soon came to Luna's attention that Twilight could have escaped Luna's grasp at any point with enough effort. However, it is clear that Twilight was letting Luna hold them to not aggravate her.

"...What...What was that sound, Twilight? Dost thou need an apothecary? " Luna asked again, even more confused with a raised eyebrow, causing Trixie to interject.

"It's long-word-a-phobia! It was Twilight's code word yesterday. We're not changelings, see?" Trixie said, trying to ease Luna's worries and hopefully not become a shish-kabab. "Just put me down and don't hurt us! Or me, at the very least."

...Of course Twilight would change the pass phrase from "Bibliography" to something that ridiculous. Couldn't be anything simple like "Friendship" or "Harmony", now could it?" Luna thought to herself. "It still doesn't make any sense to us why she liked to convoluted things like a password, as we doubt her guards have an easier time with it then we do. It defeats the purpose if her guards can't even understand it or question if the phrase was said correctly. We must address this with her later."

"You do not have to worry Miss Lulamoon, for we were fairly certain you weren't changelings. There is no way you could have passed my sentry wards otherwise." Luna let out a sigh of relief as she lowered Twilight Sparkle and the Loud and Bound Trixie onto their hooves. Princess Luna then shook her head and gave an annoyed huff. "Still, thou had us filled with dread. Twilight Sparkle, have you cursed us upon entering your castle? This now marks the THIRD time that we hath had our conversations ease-dropped on. And why in Faust's name were you sneaking around your own castle in such ridiculous costumes?"

"Told you!" Trixie snarked as she flared her cape and let it rest properly on her barrel, prompting Twilight to frown and take a second to stick her tongue out at the magician in mild annoyance. "We were worried about Edgar. We thought you all would have the wrong idea about him, and we wanted to make sure he was going to be alright."

Princess Luna's gaze shifted between the two horned ponies with an intent to admonish them with the fury of a mother who caught a filly's hoof in the cookie jar.

"It isn't like thee to act in such a guileful manner. We told you both that we would make sure no harm would befall him, and our sister has assured you both that he was alright. Doth thou not trust in us?" She asked, hoping to get a better explanation out of them.

"Then why did you try to EAT HIM!?!" A voice came out from Trixie's hat, eliciting a double take from the stunned night princess.

"Why did we- what?" Luna asked, the poor alicorn's confusion not at all dwindling as she found herself speaking to Trixie's hat. Out from under the rim of Trixie's hat, popped out the head of a Breezy...the one from yesterday, yes. Delphi seemed to be putting on a brave face in front of Luna and the other two, but it was still clear to Luna that she still instilled fear into the Breezy.

"I saw the whoooole th-th-thing! You tried to eat him earlier by going right for his weak-spots. Right under his bandages. So I went back and warned everypony else about you and your plans to eat him and gain his power! Riiiiight here." Delphi pointed at the left side of her own chest.

"I thought it was silly when Delphi came to us with that, but I wanted to help her understand that you wouldn't gobble Edgar up. We also didn't want to interrupt, since Delphi is still a bit scared of you." Twilight explained with an embarrased chuckle as she shook her head, dismissing the nonsense before she looked back at Princess Luna...who was now starting to blush like a filly with her hooves caught in the cookie jar. "Why are you being quiet, Princess Luna?"

That marks the fourth time Luna was spied on, but this was pushed into the corner of her mind. Her face started to flush in heat as blood rushed to her cheeks. Though it was obviously a misunderstanding, she couldn't help but feel bashful at the whole situation.

"N-no we were not biting Sir Edgar on purpose, we merely ho-..." Luna started before clearing her throat and realizing that they were getting off topic. "Hark, there are still mysteries surrounding him."

"Please don't change the subject, were you trying to eat him or now?" Twilight asked, leaning away from Princess Luna as her left eyebrows raised, as she started to look at Princess Luna strangely. "...Princess Luna, please! Just say that you didn't and we can prove that Delphi has nothing to fear."

"Yea, what do you mean by "on purpose"?!? Did you actually bite him?" The Great and Powerful Trixie's right eyebrow raised as she gave Princess Luna a suspicious look. "He couldn't have tasted good, since I don't remember him taking a bath this entire time. Why would you bite him if you aren't even da-."

Princess Luna shook her head as she squeezed her eyes shut.

"TheSubjectIsBeingAltered. PrayWeDoNotAlterItFurther!" Princess Luna spoke quickly, almost as if she was trying to match the speed of Laughter's manner of speaking. She didn't come close, but the untrained ear would not know that. After a few calming breaths, she regained her composure and turned back to Twilight. "Now, is that the only reason that you were spying on us?"

Twilight looked down and to the side in guilt, almost as if she was caught reaching into the cookie jar.

"...Edgar didn't ask for any of this."

"What does that mean, Twilight? He didn't ask for "what" exactly?" Princess Luna inquired, wondering if Twilight had the same feelings on the matter that she herself had.

"When Celestia asked me to voice any concerns I had...I didn't, and I forgotten my courage that moment. You and I helped each other build his dampening box, and I get why Princess Celestia thinks it's needed. I just don't think we even gave him a chance to see how he felt about all this. I just think we should have given him more of a chance then simply building that cage around him while he slept. It feels wrong that he doesn't even know why, and he had to have been so confused and scared when he woke. He shouldn't have been in the cage to begin with..."

Princess Luna is near certain of Twilight's intentions, but she has to make sure. "Take the Human's feelings into consideration? Even if it could hurt the ponies of Ponyville if let loose? Even after knowing what you know about Edgar now? If our sister's theory is correct, he could be affecting Ponyville's emotions and state of mind, and this is the worst time for that to be the case."

Twilight shook her head and gave Princess Luna a determined glare. "If he was planning on hurting anypony, he would have done it to Trixie when they met. He could have done it to Apple Bloom in the field. He could have done it to me when I was interviewing him, but he didn't! We want to live in a world where we will protect the innocent, we can't punish somepony because we think they could be guilty of doing something wrong. We don't even know that he's doing it, and if-..." Twilight continued her fierce defense of Edgar, but in honesty Princess Luna stopped listening after the first few sentences after hearing her conviction to protecting the innocent.

"If only Celestia could hear this, she would be so proud." Luna thought, almost getting chills from Twilight's continued declaration. The good kind, that is. She can see why her sister has made it a habit to tutor new students and witness their growth, and it almost tempted Luna to try and procure a disciple for herself. At the very least, one that is less talkative and excitable than Twilight. A student like her may be fulfilling, but she would certainly be a hoof-full.

"I agree. Come." Princess Luna interrupted before turning facing the stairs out of the storeroom.

"-And its not fair that I didn't make an exception when doct-..." Twilight stopped and did a double-take. "Really? Just like that?"

"Indeed. Thou art a princess too, Twilight. Your fears and worries matter just as much as ours, and if you are concerned that we are going too far with Edgar's detainment, this needs to be taken into consideration. Art thou going to follow us?"

"...I had twenty more minutes worth of reasons as to why we needed to free Edgar...This is anti-climactic." Twilight mumbled in a dispirited tone, kicking away at an imaginary pebble on the ground. Luna chuckled as she took a hoof and patted Twilight's back.

"Thou may save thine speech for our sister. She likely wouldn't want to miss it. For now, we breaketh the ice once more!" Princess Luna shot a hoof forward, pointing at the staircase "leading the charge" toward the tea parlor.

"You've been using that slang phrase often. Did you just learn it somewhere?" Twilight asked with a smile and a cheerier disposition. She, along with Trixie started to follow Princess Luna out of the room and into spiral staircase leading to the castle halls.

"Indeed. We would like to work on modernizing our vernacular. Perhaps we should simply try echoing Loyal Rainbow's or Laughing Pinkie Pie's manner of speaking, though we admit we still struggle with Kind Fluttershy's lesson of "Volume"..."

"We might wanna hurry." Delphi yelled from the back. As the trio of magic users looked behind them toward the ground where the noise was coming from, they saw Delphi peeking through the hole again. "Princess Celestia isn't smiling anymore. She looks mad."

"Ugh, Edgar probably said something stupid... Again!" Trixie face-hoofed, adjusting her hat. Delphi flew right up into the Trixie's hat, prompting Trixie to once again readjust it in annoyance after she got done the first time. After following Princess Luna toward the staircase going down from the storeroom, Trixie pipped up once more. "...Princess Luna wasn't talking about The Great and Powerful Trixie's uniform being ridiculous earlier, was she? I can understand her complaints about your outfit, Sparkle. But I think blends with my coat and suits me very well." With a wave of pride, Trixie struck a pose. "It's my brand!"

"You mean how it's super over the top and funny looking, right?" A tiny voice from her hat questioned, crushing Trixie's ego in a fell swoop. "And aren't you ripping off Star Swirl?"

"its not that bad..." Trixie said, dejected.

Luna's voice could be heard from below the staircase.

"Tis a wonderful look for a Falling Star such as thee, but thine embroidery gives thee no tactical advantage whatsoever."

***Edgar's POV***
**Tea Parlor of Twilight's castle**

"Very well, Edgar...I suppose you thought that if you had pushed her away, you may have been in a perilous predicament. There is no point in getting angry over it now." Princess Celestia said, still very annoyed at me. "This is Luna's mistake. She buttered her bread, now she gets to lie in it when I speak with her about it later."

Long story short, Princess Celestia somehow knew right away that we were lying about not touching each other, but after I explained that it was purely platonic, I am not in serious trouble. I didn't make a conscious effort to stop Luna, but I don't think I could have even if I wanted to. Given that this was the first thing she was probing me about once Luna left, I honestly don't think she was kidding about touching a princess lewdly being a punishable offence.

"Now, back to the elephant in the room. You came here to find a way home, correct?" She asked, while I nodded my head to her question. "...and because no normal pony is as strong, skilled, or knowledgeable enough to cast this spell, Trixie Lulamoon brought you here." I nodded once more. "I believe in Twilight, but even an Alicorn such as her would need help when it comes to opening a gateways like the one you're asking for, and from what Twilight described Trixie wasn't a particularly powerful Unicorn when she left. I doubt she could conjure a portal to your world."

"Well yea, I guess. She said she knew Twilight, who knew you. So I was hoping you would help me get home."

"This task is more complicated than it sounds. We can't just drop everything we are doing because you asked nicely, and it may be a bit more time-consuming than you may have hoped."

"Time-consuming? How long do you think it's going to take???" I asked, sort of dreading the answer.

"Because of how complicated spells like this can get, we need to make sure everything is set up perfectly. If our spell and preparation is imperfect, we may conjure a portal to the void between the moon and stars, and you would not survive. We need to research and determine what exactly your world is. Is it an alternate dimension? A world across the stars? Another time deep in the past of another dimension? We are unsure. That is the biggest hurdle, but not the most important one." Celestia mentioned in a slightly contradictory manner. "The medium we would need to use to accomplish this was one of my own teacher's creation, a genius of magic. It was one of his crowning achievements, and as he is no longer of this world, I would like to preserve his memory in any way that I can." Celestia mused reminiscently, probably referring to Star Swirl the Bearded.

If she is talking about Star Swirl's mirror portal thing, then this means that either the comics are canon(or so I heard, since I saw one panel from a Bizzaro-world Equestria), or the Equestria Girls movie is canon. Whichever the case, it will likely piss off a large portion of the fanbase back home.

However, I can't take joy from that thought since Celestia has been rubbing me the wrong way this entire time. It may have been the fucking headache, or it may have just been pent-up frustration from being hangry earlier or with Celestia's attitude and the runaround I have been given so far, but I just let her have it. I am sorry, but I don't think I can deal with it being spoken to like this. Being given the runaround on me getting home or not. Her not showing any form of gratitude in the slightest for saving this town, and me still not knowing what the fuck is up with that zoo exhibit she turned my room into.

"Well don't you kind of owe me for saving Ponyville? I did my part and all that, and its not like I had to do so or anything. I chose to do so."

Celestia paused her sip and put her cup down. "Explain." She commanded. "The Royal Guard stationed here made the same choice you have without asking for anything more than a safer Equestria and compensation for their services. Six of them have given their lives yesterday."

"Only six guards died in this invasion? That's way better than I thought it could have been. From what I saw coming in, they were getting beaten back and I came in to help with the heavy lifting. It could have been much worse if I didn't show up last minute, right?"

The corner of Celestia's mouth twitched. "Only six?"

Oh...oh that could have been worded better.

"I mean, when all things considering, this could have been much worse, and I didn't really swear any oaths or pro-" Celestia held up a hoof and I shut up immediately. I clearly crossed a line with her.

"Only six..." she repeated to herself looking off to the side and nodding with a pursed smile. It felt as if she was deciding how best to serve me to a neighboring dragon, and it only affirmed my fears once Princess Celestia turned back to me. "Private Sequoia Saps, M.P Shields. Sergeant-Major Loud Mouth..." Princess Celestia started to recite names and titles, but the impression was that it was not from memory, but from heart with the care of that one would show when giving a eulogy. "Second Centurion Slow Dancer. Private Barkhide. Private Major Stone Wall. Cadet Onyx Bolt. Vexillarius Flag Keeper. Praetorians Left Hook and Right Hook. Vexillarius Stand Maker, and now Private Heavy Spoon, who was executed in broad daylight after giving his life to protect Ponyville. These are the names of the Stallions and Mares that have given their lives protecting Equestria this year of the many hundreds I have personally overseen the funerals of. I've personally lost count of them, and of all of our failures yesterday, the bravery of my little ponies were not one of them. You may have "saved" Ponyville before my sister could, but every minute they spent battling off the changelings was another life they saved. None of our citizens died, and the price of this was their blood, not yours. I would ask that you choose your next words very carefully and not disrespect the noble dead in my presence ever again."

Holy fuck, I'm a douche...

"I-I wasn't thinking, and I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry." I tried to apologize. "On my world, when you hear of battles or war, we'd hear about fights that had at least a few dozen or a few hundred, let alone the millions that have died. There was a battle we learned of in our history class in a single city called Stalingrad, which had roughly a million soldiers die on the low estimate."

"...I see. What a terrible place you come from, for your first thought of their deaths to be the quantity of the mares and stallions that died rather than the quality of the pony who made gave everything they ever had...everything they ever will have, for your tribe." Celestia clicked her tongue. "I will pray every day now that we never become so callous here."

"We don't do that. That was just me being frustrated and a douche about the whole "not getting home anytime soon" thing. Respecting soldiers is actually a really big deal in my country and I was just being an idiot and speaking before I think...again. I can't apologize enough."

"Don't apologize or justify yourself to me. Be better." She scolded at me, now wearing a rigid expression as she seemed to judge me. There was an awkward and tense silence in the room for a few moments as we seemed to start calming down, and Celestia took this time to use her magic and refill both her own cup and mine with tea. Strangely enough, the liquid in both of our cups seemed to be steaming even more than usual. I would have expected it to cool by now, and the steam seemed to obscure Celestia's face as well as a gossamer veil.

"Regarding your trip back home, I have given it a bit more consideration. I now believe it is for the best to get you home as quickly as possible, and I will ask all of the three other Alicorns and some of the strongest unicorns we know of to make time for "Ponyville's Hero" and send you to your home. It would have taken up a few months on normal circumstances, but for you..." Celestia seemed to give that answer a bit of thought as she bore into me with that uncomfortable glare. "...weeks."

I released my breath that I didn't know I was holding. It is a bit bittersweet hearing that. I do want to get home, and while I am happy that it could have been done so quick, it sucks that I gave Celestia has such a bad taste in her mouth about me now. That's not me, and I hate feeling like I can't make up for this or take back this mistake. I'm getting the feeling that she is trying to plow through this as quickly as possible because she doesn't want me to stick around, which sucks because I really wanted to try and hang out with everyone else from the show. Possibly do a little bit of trolling with Discord? I don't know if I'll have time for anything, or anypony if I am leaving this quickly.

"And if we find a way for you to go home you will leave for certain?" Celestia probed with a monotone voice.

"I'm sorry?"

"We're going to be spending a lot of time trying to send you home. This will be a monumental risk, and I don't want efforts that can be better spent ensuring the safety of my ponies to be in vain." She explained, using her magic to pour herself another cup of tea. She already finished the first piping hot cup that she poured since our spat? Is her throat insulated or something? How is she not in pain? "I need you to say that you will. Once you do, we shall commit to this."

"Is that all I have to do? Just dip out as soon as I can?" She just scanned me with calculating eyes, not letting up her burning gaze as she sipped her tea, not blinking since the question was first asked. "Alrighty then. Let's shake on it. I leave the minute the portal is made." I extended my hand out in hopes to get some sort of agreement between us, but it just hung out awkwardly in mid-air as she kept that gaze upon me. "Eh-heh, it's called a handshake on my world, by you might call it a hoof-shake." I explained.

If I had blinked, I could have seen that she only looked down for a fraction of a moment at my offending appendage before leveling her eyes back to bore into mine. She saw my hand was out but she made zero effort to reciprocate and just kept looking at it. It was like my hand was offending her some way or another. Her eyes seemed warmer when she offered the oatmeal before, but there was a cold calculation behind them now, like she was sizing me up—not as a guest, but as a threat.

Ok I know handshakes existed in the show. There was plenty of episodes that had something like this, right? Unless this is some sort of Mandela thing going on. I'm not going crazy, am I?

I retracted my hand and put it to better use scratching the back of my head in what I would assume is obvious discomfort.

"Very well. We shall work on getting you back to your world. We do not need your hand-shake, as your word would suffice," She waved off, still unblinking in her judgements. "During this time, I am prohibiting you from making any attachments to my little ponies. Control whatever "urges" you may have during your time, and do not act upon them. Do not make friends with them. Do not court them. Do not even touch them, or I will know."

"What, why?" I stuttered as a blush crept on my face. "I-I mean I'm not planning on trying to go on a date or anything, but that seems a bit off-topic. I mean, they aren't humans. I mean, sure I think they are nice and colorful and have great personalities, but they're... I mean, they're ponies!!! I mean, not that there was anything wrong with that, or anything, but...they're PONIES!"

I was doing my best to convince her, but I think I was honestly trying to convince myself as well. I will admit feel a bit disgusted with myself for thinking of these characters in that way for the past few days. While they may be adults and act lewd sometimes(or a little too often in the short time that I known them), they were made to entertain children. At least, that was the intention, before a bunch of Bronies decided to draw lewd/humanized art of them.

Did I get a boner with Trixie when we were drunk that one time? Sure! I was drunk as hell and that was my second time having alcohol. I'm not that good with drinking yet. And even when she did suck on my finger like she was trying to polish it into a fine point...come on, it caught me off-guard. It doesn't count!

Did I get a boner when that Changeling Queen was acting like one of those chicks from the Monster Girl Quest tiddy games? You betcha, but she was already stroking my dick with her tail! Her TAIL! Kinda hard to resist biology and it's cruel effects on a guy who still hasn't gotten laid yet.

It's a bit different from seeing a lewd on Derpibooru or FimFiction and seeing a cartoon character you know in the flesh, Humanized, Anthro, or otherwise. Even if I had an attraction to them(or the idea of them), I would feel like a creep trying to make a move on them after knowing so much about them and their world. Like I was some stalker or something. That'd be like trying to get it on with Ash Ketchum's Mom or something.

Wait, did she say I can't even make friends with them? What the hell kind of out-of-character statement was that?

Celestia took a large intake of air through her nose as she seemed to start getting frustrated. The feeling is mutual. "I don't know why I have to explain this to you. Surely you would have considered this as a common courtesy you should have zero issue following through on. Should you by any miracle or curse sire a foal, you cou-"

"Celestia stop, please!" This is getting annoying.

"So we are in agreement in this, at least?" What a stupid question, and I feel like you're drilling into me on purpose. I get it, you don't like me. Cool.

I was starting to get a bit irritated at her, and this headache isn't helping. "Yea, but why even bring it up in the first place? If I am leaving as quickly as you said I was, there wouldn't be a chance, even if I was interested in that kind of stuff, which I'm not! And why did you say I can't even be friends with them? I'm not doing anything wrong if I crack a joke or two, or if we tell stories and-"

Celestia interrupted me once more, her words feeling like they are pressing into my skull and pounding their way out. "Why do you think it be ill-advised to make lasting bonds and attachments with my ponies when you know you will never see them again?"

"Fine, I get it. I'll do my best to be as blunt and unapproachable as you would like me to be." I snarked at her, getting a bit more angry.

"You will not "do your best", you will do. I need you to make this promise right now. I need to hear these words right out of your mouth. You need to give me your word, your solemn vow that you will stay away from my ponies. If a pony even bumps into you on accident, you will tell me and explain in detail what happened. Do I make myself clea-"

I had enough of this bullshit.

"ALRIGHT already! I already said I wouldn't do it, what the FUCK do you want from me!?!" I shouted at her, smacking a fist against my bandaged palm. "God, ever since I've been cooped in that box, I've been treated like an SCP or a Zoo animal! The guards that escorted me here would not say a fucking word and couldn't even be bothered to grab a cane or a crutch or something. Because of that, I took one little stumble and almost tripped. A good half of your guard drew their swords at me for that. ME! After I played hero for Trixie and Ponyville, my reward is to be treated like John Wayne Gacy?" I slammed my fist against my palm again, as if to count my grievances. "You still haven't explained why I woke up in that glass box. You haven't even explained what that is about. You still don't trust or believe a word I say when I have ZERO reason to lie right now. I feel like I've been walking on eggshells, and its only around you. I really don't appreciate the fucking third-degree. You fucking made your point, so take your "W" and just drop it, bitch!" I rested my pounding head in my free hand as I leaned back.

...Holy crap, my jaw is actually shaking right now, and I can't get it to stop.

Though I don't like her at all right now, her reasoning made sense so far. What I didn't like, however, is how she said it. Her logic made sense, but I still let my emotions get the drop on me.

There was an eerie silence in the room before I felt a small shiver right as I got done venting at her, feeling goosebumps over my body. This was not a cold shiver, but it felt like one of those random shivers I would get just out of the blue. I started to fear that I might have made a big mistake interrupting her...calling her a bitch...and being as aggressive as I was right now.

Something in the room changed and it's not just the mood. I can't tell what, but it's there.

Neither her face changed nor her posture as she sat there on that couch observing me, but she kept looking at me as the room grew a little bit brighter from her horn's glow. She was still holding her tea. It was the fact that she seemed so unfazed by my outburst, that was giving me the heebie-jeebies, and she was clearly the one in charge in this room. Almost like she was expecting this from me.

Gradually, I felt my entire body started shaking for some reason. It wasn't just my jaw from earlier, but it was like I was getting cold shivers across my entire body... It was as if I was feeling a primal fear.

Like I was in imminent danger

As if I was already staring at a snake inches away, only to now have it start uncoiling its hood and revealing itself to be a King Cobra that I just poked with a stick.

"So I have..." Celestia said after clicking her tongue again before getting up and walking toward me, avoiding the coffee table between us. It now came to my attention that I was relying on that as a sort of teddy bear or a placebo for a wall between us. As she drew closer it dawned on my just how much taller she was. " For the time being, you are to remain in your guest room. You are not to try and leave until we ponder upon on this situation further. I also know of your diet, due to the extensive notes my faithful student wrote down, of course. I don't know what your previous eating habits were, but all forms of bovid are sentient here. Chickens and Pigs are also not on your menu, as they help with our agriculture. Every meal from them to feed you would take the meals of three or more ponies. As such, we can only accept you adopting a pescatarian diet while you remain in Equestria." She got nothing but a blank stare from me. "... This means "fish"." She deadpanned at me.

"I-I see...none of that is bad. Thank you" I acknowledge, still stuttering. I kinda expected that, since that was the fallback that most fanfictions fell back on. Otherwise, I would have no idea how they would tolerate Gryphons or Minotaur in the show's lore. Celestia stayed quiet after this, and I looked down and away from her to try and hid from her gaze. The silence was starting to get to me. Maybe she wants an apology from me? Yea, That's it. I just have to swallow my pride and apologize. "Cel- er, Princess Celestia, I want to apologize. I shouldn't have s-"

"Don't think you are off the hook just yet, hero." She warned me, letting the word roll off her tongue like a piece of raw garlic. "You may have pulled a wool over the eyes of my sister, my student, and that entertainer that insisted on traveling with you, but you have not fooled me. I know that you were lying to us...about more than just Luna "holding hooves" with you." Celestia finally revealed with a mocking tone, as if to gauge my reaction. I'm bit sure what face I could have made since my heart stopped for a split-second after hearing that.

She...She knows. She has to know.

I started to hear music again...

There was something wrong... There's been something wrong here, but now I can hear it in this music. It didn't sound anything like any of the music that I heard my entire time here. Not even when I was fighting Telsona did the music become this sinister...this terrifying.

Involuntarily, I started to retreat back further, only succeeding in pushing myself further and further into the cushions of the couch I was sitting in, molding myself into the fabric.

"Do I know of one par~ti~cu~lar lie? Do I know about every lie you have given up until this point? I will let you stew on that...It's not the first time we have been lied to and it will probably not be the last. That is what your kind is known for. A cornucopia of "Lies"." I heard Celestia spat out, almost as if peeling a nasty bit of food off of her tongue. "Your kind have destroyed families, eviscerated nations, and ruined the lives of loved ones with lies. Even the ones told in good intention paved the road to Tartarus, and those who do so with good intent suffer the worst, as they not only sacrifice the trust of those that love them but they sacrifice their own convictions. They sacrifice what made them "ponies", what made them..."Hyuuu-man." Celestia's words were coated with venom as she approached my seat with a quiet fury. "As hatred breeds hatred, as love blossoms into more love, lies grow upon lies like a cancer, eventually leading to more suffering. This cancer, however, has been known to be contagious. I should probably admit to you that I too have lied today. Were you not in the nullification zone, you may have heard of how much that Magician, Trixie, obsessed over your wellbeing. You may have heard how much my student questioned my decision in interviewing you. You may have even been woken up by the argument and choice words my sister had for me earlier this morning about your circumstances." I felt that Princess Celestia stopped somewhere in front of me as the room grew humid and thick.

"I told Miss Trixie Lulamoon you were fine, and this was true. But also I told my student and my sister earlier this morning that no harm, no matter the circumstance, would befall you in your time here. This was a lie, and a promise I can't keep...Look at me, Human."

I didn't dare to do so. I couldn't even voluntarily blink or shut my eyes. The stinging feeling I felt as from not blinking was overshadowed by the terrifying presence looming over me...an overwhelming pressure bearing down on me as a small screech grew louder and louder.

"I command thee LOOK!" Princess Celestia BOOMED as she reared back on two legs and as slammed her two of her gold-adorned front hooves about a foot and a half away from either side of my head in a muffled CRACK. I flinched, still shaking as I slowly turned my head back up to meet Celestia's gaze. I heard cracking noises coming from what I assumed was stressed wood under the upholstery from the section where she was resting her weight on. As I craned my neck upward, this position perspective just how huge and menacing she actually was, as the shadow casted from her silhouette was enough to swallow me entirely. She was not as big as an actual horse, but that hardly made a difference as she was still an Alicorn, and she was bigger than Luna at the end of the day. I felt as if she could break me with her bare hooves if she so pleased. She needed no magic to do so. What struck me most of this view was her face, or lack thereof. Obscured by a copious amount of steamy mist, all I could perfectly make out were her eyes...her glowing magenta eyes that peered furiously through this induced fog.

Celestia still had her teacup and the pot in her magical grip, hovering over me and glowing not just from her magic, but from an ever growing heat that felt like would eventually turn the dishware into molten ceramic even from where I was sitting. The strange concoction inside both was starting to boil and sizzle like crazy as steam continued to billow from the dishware. Tiny little droplets from the bubbles that popped from it landed every which way. Some landing on my face, causing me to let out hitches in my breath as I winced. Some of it landed on Celestia, though it did not even seem to effect her, as it evaporated into a milky steam as soon as it touched her. A tumultuous whistle of hot vapors poured out of the teapot she had in her grasp like a continuous scream, growing louder and louder and LOUDER. The steam could not come out fast enough though, as the lid of the teapot had an ominous rattle as the steam was trying to find any way it could to escape it's confinement. Celestia was unfazed, Not breaking her eye contact with as if she watching for my next move. "Now pay close attention Hyu-man...Don't touch me. If you so much as brush up against me, the magic holding these will likely fail and they will melt on top of you."

The music changed again...or, evolved. It was more or less the same, but it was starting to get bombastic. Louder. It was as if it was screaming at me, trying to warn me that I was in terrible danger, and that I needed to run, while also warning me that if I so much as tried, I was going to die right there. I can't control the trembling in my hands nor the sweat from the humidity beading down my forehead nor the formation of liquid terror starting to coalesce near my tear ducts, and as I exhaled, i-my breathing, oh my god I can't control it! As many breaths as I take in, I can't seem to get enough air. I feel like I'm suffocating. These bandages are getting too tight, a--aad-and I

"Whether or not I keep my promise to them is based entirely upon your actions hence forth. I can not keep it if you attempt to bring any harm, intentional or not, to the lives of the ponies here...I would recommend you do not give me a reason to come back and take you back to Canterlot myself, because I promise you will be looking for one. If it were up to me and me alone, you wouldn't even be sitting here. You would have been placed in a dungeon, or kept in the crystal maze under Canterlot until it is time for you to leave. But no, you get to rest in that gilded cage only because of my student's faith in you, which can change the moment you slip up. And if you think about breaking any taboos with Twilight... I won't hesitate to kill you with my bare hooves." Celestia raised her right hoof and banged down on the couch's wooden ridges, leaving sickening snaps as the wood spine started to fracture. "Stomp... Stomp... STOMP! And when you die, you won't have anypony here to mourn or celebrate you. I will make sure you are forgotten to time. Am I still making my point clear?!?! AM I???" She yelled into me as the prismatic colors of her hair growing whiter and whiter as her hair adopted a shade of white-hot fire.

I'm petrified.

I can't move. I can't breath. I can't think! My vision is getting blurry, and whether it is from tears streaming down my face or from the steam of the tea being flash boiled away, I can't tell since I can't even tell if I am still asleep or if I am living through a nightmare.

"...and you're crying now??? All that bravado, your blustering boasts, and your crude mockery of the fallen and you're CRYING?You haven't even received that "Third-degree" that you were talking about earlie-"

"TIA!"

An echoing boom came from the doorway, giving me the absolute worse jump scare of my entire life as I yelped and metaphorically shat myself...if I had actually had anything to eat other than that bowl of oatmeal, I would have. The crystal chandelier above us rattled as a few papers napkins flew from the coffee table toward Celestia's direction. It looked as if they were going to hit Celestia until they combusted into embers before touching her. As Celestia looked up from me, I felt the hold her eyes had on me break.

Those haunting eyes...

I'm alive... You're alive... Breath in through your nose...and out through your mouth... You're still alive, and you have to breath...

As quickly as the music came it faded abruptly, leaving the the only ambiance I could make out being our heavy breaths and my heart seemingly trying to beat it's way out of my chest.

As things were starting to get too quiet for my comfort, I turned shakily turned to find Princess Luna at the doorway. Her knees were bent as she appeared ready to charge; Her eyebrows were cocked like a blade, and you could almost see a tumbling blue flame starting to seep out of the corner of her eyes as she barred her teeth in fury at the white alicorn.

"A word. NOOOOOoow!" She growl through her teeth.

With a raised eyebrow and flared nostrils, Celestia gave a nod and walked over to Luna, letting the ceramic dishware in her magic gently rest on the table, slowly warping as the air cooled it. Gone were the embossed floral patterns that previously adorned the kettle, as the multitude of colors they used to have mixed to form a pinkish-green amalgam. You could still feel the heat radiating off them as they cooled, and the air felt humid now. Celestia's hair reverted back to its rainbow-pastel colors, but the scowl she wore never left.

I'm still shaking, and I'm still alive. I'm fine. I'm fine. I can just ignore the headache and I'll be fine later. Just... in through my nose, out through my mouth.

Luna's horn glowed, and they were soon surrounded by a blue translucent bubble. I saw that Luna was flaring her nostrils in suite as she was breathing, and she looked upon her sister with loathing. She took a deep and long winded breath and in that split second I thought I was going to lose my hearing for good this time. I covered my ears as best as I could and squeezed my eyes shut, bracing myself for the Royal Canterlot voice. Strangely enough, I didn't hear single thing. At first I thought that they were so loud I lost my hearing with Luna's yelling, but then heard some rumbling and some of the crystals of the chandelier jingling a little. When I opened my eyes I saw that Luna was in fact yelling at her sister, though I couldn't hear a single thing of what was being said. It looked as if she was trying to pantomime her audition for the Incredible Hulk, and though I couldn't hear what was being said I could feel her yelling. Celestia didn't let up either and gave what looked like just as much force back into her retorts, adding to the vibrations that were reverberating in the bubble and around the room too. Even the leftover tea inside the cups were rippling like there was an earthquake going on outside.

They both had to be talking about me somehow, as both Luna and Celestia were making gestures toward me as they yelled.

"Edgar..." a voice called from my side."...Edgar, are you okay?"

***Third person POV***
The tea parlor of Twilight's castle

Music rang in the ears of both Alicorns, but as they casted wards on themselves earlier to try and negate the effects, they paid little attention to the ambiance that echoed within their little bubble.

Luna could not believe what she had seen. In truth she arrived roughly a minute before she even spoke, observing a side of her sister she had never seen before. She appeared to be at a loss for words, trying to find the right thing to say, as calm heads prevail.

"You...BITCH!" Princess Luna spat.

But how could she stay calm after what she just witnessed?

"Hast thou lost thine senses!?!" Luna screamed at her sister, pointing at the Human stallion still trembling at the couch. "That stallion risked life and limb to save this town and the first thing you do is imprison and interrogate him like a war criminal?"

"I thought that's exactly what we both agreed we were doing. Whatever happened to "good guard, bad guard", Lulu?"

"Do not presume to "Lulu" us, Celestia! Forsooth, madness hath overtaken thee in thy attempts to interrogate this pony! That was MORE than you being "The Bad Guard"! Had you a cock, I wouldst mistaken thee for THE MAD KING SOMBRA!" Luna stomped her hoof into the ground, causing a few cracks to appear in the Azure floor as magic slowly left one of the tiles. Had she been paying attention, she would have noticed a few specks of crystal falling from the ceiling and bouncing off the shield the siblings have conjured. "Edgar already did gallow half-to-death with thee imprisoning him out of nowhere. Imprisonment that WE had helped with, and thou art threatening the boy with a life in Tartarus? WITH DEATH? Holding Liquified clay over him after he hath obviously shown he did hath nothing but valorous intentions? THIS IS NOT OUR SISTER!"

"Open thine eyes, sister. Do you really think that something that is pissing their pants over there is a powerful warrior capable of routing an entire army, let alone a Changeling Queen by themselves?" Celestia pointed to Edgar. "If you try to do the exact same thing without magic and you would not be standing here and you know it." She explained with furrowed brows. "We both know he is not being honest with us, and his words thus far is highly suspect! If he had told us the truth, we could accept that he simply wanted to make a name for himself, as his situation mirrors Miss Lulamoon's situation with the Ursa Minor, and yet he is so adamantly keen on trying to keep his secrets, one would suspect that he might die if they are discovered."

With every emphasized word, she cocked her hoof back and pointed right toward Edgar, not taking her eyes of her eyes off of Luna as the wind of her Royal Canterlot voice blasted Luna's hair back.

"WHY is he still alive after encountering Telsona's forces and WHY was he so Tartarus-bent on not telling us!?! Every moment he keeps this secret is another moment our ponies are not safe."

"From whom? The Changelings? Thus far, the only threat to anypony we have seen today is thee!"

"Watch...your...tone, Luna." Celestia's eyes narrowed as her voice started to lower. "You know that I am referring to the human..."

"You think we do not knoooow he has not been honest about his time here? We were both in agreement of this, but I shall not idly by as a Princess of Equestria-neigh, my own BLOOD treating him with such sadistic hatred. Hast though not seen his bandages? His cuts and bruises? Of his lies, he can't be faking those, and his actions and his pain speaks for themselves. Look upon him..." Luna interrogated as she turned and pointed to Edgar. Upon seeing him and the shivering tear-stained face again, Luna whipped her head back at Celestia with a renewed vengeance and speed that you could almost hear. "LOOK AT HIM!!! LOOK AT WHAT THOU ART WROUGHT UPON HIS STATE! Sir Edgar scared and in an unfamiliar world...alone. Whether he is was telling the truth or not, his cuts and bruises speak more than his words ever could! He is clearly not wanting of yet another battle against a Queen, and certainly not threats of death or imprisonment from the one Princess everypony looks up to in Equestria."

Celestia took a moment to magically steady her crown, which had almost slid off the Diarch's head due to the wind and vibrations occurring in this bubble. A normal ponies ear drums would have suffered long term damaged by now, but despite the Alicorns being accustomed to this volume of speech, Celestia was starting to get a migraine. "I will not pity a fool who willingly wanders in places they have no duty being. Better ponies have died on that battlefield, regardless of if they truly understood the finality of their fate." Celestia said heatedly, completely dismissing Edgar's plight and state. Tensions in the sister's bubble seemed to rise, almost as if ready to pop the bubble at any moment as Luna was slowly starting to lose what little patience she had of her sister this very moment. Celestia was not finished however. "He "saved" Ponyville. Great. Fantastic, even! That will certainly make up for the knife he would have lodged in any of our backs at the worst possible moment."

"A bold claim coming from somepony who portrayed themselves as a fair and just ruler until now. Though art bucking delusional! Were it not for him, this town would have be ashes. Are you simply going to take the lives he saved for granted, Celestia?" Luna spat off to the side of her sister's hooves as if to wash the now bitter taste out of her sister's name out of her mouth. A tear of wet, frustrated anger began to form on the corner of Luna's eye, caused by disbelief that she could see her own sister in such a state of vitriol. "Perish the truth thou so seeketh. Tis not worth the price of his friendship! Tis not worth the kind heart I know you have! This isn't you! We know it!"

"Even if he was telling us the entire truth at this point, its purpose would be a lie. His kind i-..." Celestia interrupted her train of though. "This human is unpredictable, and thou art no better a ruler, what with your "idea" to use him and whatever his capabilities are to help rid us of Changelings." Celestia took an antagonist tone, scolding her sister. "You act as though you are on some sort of "moral high-ground", but have you even told him you expect him to aid you further? To do it all again and assist you in your genocidal crusade you are trying to pitch to Equestria? Or are you going to spring that onto him out of nowhere?"

"Thou art not one to speaketh of such things, hypocrite. As we recall it was you who sent Discord to capture with Tirek, only to have him join him in "Jolly Cooperation". " Luna spat with her hooves forming air quotes, as she now started to pace back and forth in the bubble. "Yet despite all that, his betrayal, his lesson, his atonement were the key to defeating Tirek. We loath to admit it, but Discord is "reformed", and has since been a stalwart companion to Kind Fluttershy. Like with Edgar, none of us would be here today without him. If somepony who was as vile and chaotic as Discord once was could make a turn of the better and become allies with us, then why can't he?" She pointed at Edgar. "Rather than force him to leave, make peace and let it be his choice if he would like to help us. Until the time whence he is needed, we will protect him..."

Celestia blinked a couple times, almost dumbstruck.

"Prote-TELSONA'S INCURSION JUST PROVED THAT WE CAN'T EVEN PROTECT OUR OWN PONIES. THINK! LU-NA!" Celestia screamed, tapping a hoof at her head with those last three syllables. Celestia herself was starting to get teary-eyed in frustration. "Let's just entertain this for a moment and pretend that he is a venerable knight such as Shining Armor and isn't lying through his teeth. One who do no such thing as to bring harm upon our subjects. How is it that you think you can protect him, hmm? I've heard the Queen is still alive, Luna. What do you think this Changeling, whom Twilight described being sadistic, dangerous, and on the same caliber of Chrysalis, would do when she recovers from this humiliating defeat? Who do you think is the first pony she is going to hunt down, HMM?" She pointed at Edgar's direction once again, who was still very-much frozen in fear. "He is as good as dead if he stays, and I will not leave the fate of my little ponies in the clutches of a MONSTER! I made the choice that nopony else could, Luna! I was the "bad guard", and I made sure he will have zero intention of staying, let alone have to worry about his effects on Equestria. He will be galloping back to his rotten home the moment we are able to create his portal. It will be on his own volition, and we don't have to factor him in. That is final!" A stomp of Celestia's own cracked tiles on her side of the crystal floors, giving signs that she herself was starting to lose patience with this conversation. This was ending right now, and Edgar was going back into his gilded cage as she started to walk toward the direction of the couch the Human was yet trembling at.

"We were once a monster once too, Tia...and we still are to many, including the Changeling vermin." Luna said with gritted teeth, her voice trembling as she wore a face wet with rage and frustration, as tears finally started to roll down. "W-were I not your sister, would we hath simply been another monster to you? You hath given us a chance to prove ourselves despite every horrible thing we have done all those years ago, and we hath lived as honorably as one could since then..." Luna's face had wet streaks running down her face. This has been an emotional time for them, and while they have been known to argue from time to time, they had not done so with such vitriol for a long time. Seeing Luna's angry tear-soaked face caused Celestia to turn away from her sister and Edgar's direction, her own tears starting to roll down from the painful memories long since past.

"Luna, please...you can't fall for that monster's charms! You mustn't..." Celestia barely eked out with a voice hoarse from the yelling they have both done to one another, she barely sniffled. There is only one fight they had that was worse than this, and the stain of time has yet to wash away from that millennia ago.

"...and the one creature that we didn't have to prove ourselves for...The one creature who knew who we were and still accepted us without demanding us to prove ourselves is across the room from us. And they are a scared of us...If that matters to thee, we...I'm begging of you. Consider the same kindness you had shown to us for one who has also acted honorably, who trusted Twilight enough to speak plainly for every silly little question she had. Whom little Apple Bloom called "her guardian angel". Who had not shunned us for the monstrous things they know I had done..."" She rubbed out the tears that started to fall down her eyes, looking toward Edgar to see if he finally calmed down, but also in hopes that he could not see them both in such a pitiful state.

"...Where art thou, Edgar?" Luna asked in sudden shock. Celestia's eyebrows raised as she looked where Luna was looking, finding an empty spot on the couch and pieces of bandage strewn about. Neither the human, Twilight, or Trixie were anywhere to be seen.

***Edgar's POV***
**Tea Parlor of Twilight's castle.**
*Moments before*

As I watched these ponies bicker back and forth, I almost could have sworn that they would have damaged their vocal cords by how much they seemed to be yelling, or lost their hearing... and I was relieved that no pony was talking to me.

"Edgar...?" a voice called from behind me.

I stayed quiet...I didn't want her to notice I was still here.

The same voice called out but I was honestly too shaken up to realize who it could have been until a light blue unicorn came on the left side of my peripheral vision. As I turned toward her, I could tell it was Trixie by the shape of her outfit and the color of her coat, but she honestly seemed like a blur to me.

"...Edgar, are you okay?" Trixie asked in a gentle voice, sizing me up with worry in her eyes. "You're shaking Edgar, please say something. What did she tell you?"

"Yea, don't..." I had to stop myself to take a few breaths. I just realized that I was holding my breath the moment Trixie started talking to me as if I was waiting for something to happen. Despite all that, I am still okay. I stuck a thumb out of my fist and the flesh of my hands turned white as I squeezed to try and give a picture-perfect thumbs-up. "Don't worry about me. I'm su-super!" I smiled with strain. Judging how miserably I failed to stop that stutter, I can only imagine what it looked like to Trixie. I don't think there was a point in trying to lie. Trixie did not call me out on that though, and she reached toward me as if to comfort me.

Without knowing why I started to lean away from her, pulling one of the segments of the couch cushion with me. It was then I realized that I was still squeezing it for dear life with my other hand, and after forcing myself to let go, I started to feel an aching relief in my digits and my wellbeing.

Just when I thought I was starting to get my bearings and steady by own breathing, I saw out of the corner of my eye that Celestia turned towards me.

Despite the hot flashes I had already been receiving throughout my day, the look she gave me froze my blood and soul to their core.

That look. That horrible horrible look. Those horrible horrible eyes.

For anyone else that has never watched this show, she could have just been upset or angry, but I had a flashback to a scene from the show when she fought Queen Chrysalis in the Royal Canterlot wedding. It had a frontal shot of Celestia's face upon the reveal of Queen Chrysalis. In the show, it was just a fight where she had stand up to the evil queen to save Canterlot against a threat in city lands. Here in this Equestria with death and with ponies that had feelings and weren't two-dimensional? It was probably kill or be killed between her and Queen Chrysalis, with the fate of her friends, family, and her country on the line.

And here I was on the receiving end of the same look she gave Queen Chrysalis before they fought, and I started to shake again.

I felt something touch my right shoulder.

I flinched on reflex as I balled up my right fist and retracted in a sort of half-boxer stance. As it was coming up from my lap, I ended up nailing something that felt fleshy yet rigid.

"OW!" came the other voice, and as I looked, I saw a purple Alicorn holding her nose with scrunched up eyes. I realized what I had just done, and though it was on accident I was now certain of my imminent future.

"oh no...."

The shaking turned to quaking...

***Third person POV***
**Tea Parlor of Twilight's castle.**

"oh no...." Edgar uttered quietly.

"Jeez Edgar... I'm sorry for startling you, but you have to be more careful in the future. That really hurt." Twilight said with a nasally voice, sniffling with her head tilted upward as she gave her nose some experimental prods. She soon winced in regret. "oww-oww-oww. Am I bleeding Trixie? It feels like it."

"Oh it can't be that bad! Aren't you built like an Armipasi since you're an Alicorn?" Trixie said, ripping another colored handkerchief from her hat as she held it against Twilight's nose.

"I'm a bit tougher than I used to be, but I'm not going to go asking ponies to kick me in the face!" Twilight justified, soon taking the offered handkerchief from Trixie to hold against her nose as she sniffed up the blood. "Thanks Trixie, that wasn't pleasant."

"...I'm...I'm going to die..." Edgar muttered, before starting to get up.

Both the mares who were previously distracted by the quick bop on the nose Twilight received snapped their heads and saw that Edgar sprung out of his seat and started to walk out of the room, which slowly turned into a powerwalk....then a jog, getting faster and faster. All the while, he was tearing away at any of the bandages that were limiting to his movements.

"Edgar?" Twilight questioned with unease, showing a growing concern etched upon her face as she teleported ahead of him as she trotted alongside the human. Her being a quadruped made it easy, even if this whole situation made her uneasy. "Edgar, what does that mean??? Where are you going!?!" Not liking what that implied in the slightest, Twilight sent a magic signal to every guard the west wing of her castle to help stop Edgar from running away, and that something was wrong. In the meantime, she had to try stopping him without the use of her magic. Luckily, Princess Twilight was a strong mare now that she had Alicorn blood flowing through her veins. She teleported in front of him once more and pushed against him with her shoulders.

She was more than strong enough by herself to stop Edgar...for a split second. Somehow, this human appeared to slip past her by doing some sort of "martial" technique on instinct that Twilight had never seen before. Pulling down on the crooks of her hooves she had on his chest, he performed what appeared to be a pirouette and spun out of her grasp. His motion seemed like a hoofball dodge with the grace of a beginner ballerina's twirl, which appeared to use Twilight's own strength against her as it focused on redirecting it. It was a strange technique, and caught Twilight off-guard. She was not harmed, but it stopped her from getting a good hold for that one second.

Now that Twilight knows what to expect, she could probably attempt to do grab Edgar again, but decided against it. If you meet force with more force, there is a chance she might end up hurting him. She needed him to understand that whatever was the matter, he was not in any danger. Either way, Twilight created enough of a delay for Trixie to teleport beside him as well to try and talk some sense into him.

"Edgar please! Take a deep breath. Drink some water, do something but you have to calm down." No response from the Edgar before Trixie ran behind him and grabbed the edge of his pants' nylon belt with her teeth. "WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN TO US!" She yelled through teeth and fabric as she felt herself getting dragged by the Human. Whatever happened in there, he was terrified of something.

Almost immediately, thestral guards lead by one of Luna's helmeted centurions flew in and arrived at the scene with an always impressive response time.

"Whoa hey! What's the rush, Romeo?" The red-eyed thestral asked as she stopped in front of Edgar, holding up a hoof in front of her to get him to slow down. Neither Scarlett nor the guards under her command seemed to intimidate Edgar in the slightest. He did not even register their existence as he ran past them. "I-hey, HEY STOP! HALT!" She dropped her friendly canter as she sprinted up and grabbed his left leg, her intention was to lift him up and knock him off balance. However, he seemed to simply fall forward into a roll without any resistance, taking both Trixie and Scarlett to the ground with him. "By order of the lunar g-". Before the Scarlett could finish a command, she was stunned as she saw that Edgar's eyes were almost blank with pure abject terror as tears rolled down his face, causing her voice to drop in attempts to deescalate the situation. "Hey hey, it's okay. Talk to me. What's wrong, Romeo?"

The human's head turned and appeared to looked toward Trixie's direction, holding one of his claws in front of his face as if to hide from whatever had him spooked as he tried using another one to pull himself away in the opposite direction. "Please...don't hu-" he sputtered with froths of foam started forming at this mouth. His eyes dazed and frightened before slipping into unconsciousness as he started to hyperventilate, making a gurgling sound though the foam of spit as he rolled onto his side.

"HeyheyHEY! Can you hear me!?!" Scarlett asked, wiping away the foam near his mouth and keeping it open to try and clear up his airway. She used a hoof to lightly smack his cheeks and tried shaking him awake. "Come on, come on~.... keep breathing. Give me a sign you can hear me you can hear me, Romeo...EDGAR!" She called out to try and keep him awake.

No response.

"What's happening to him, WHAT'S HAPPENING!?" Trixie yelled with a terror stricken shudder, gently using a hoof to stroke his chest. "Edgar, can you hear me!? You're going to be okay. You're going to be okay, can you hear me?!?" She reassured, frantically shaking his back. Trixie’s hooves fumbled; she didn’t know if she should hold him, call for help, or do something. anything."HELP! HELP US!" She called out.

The female thestral currently tending to Edgar cocked one hoof back and pushed Trixie's chest as hard as she could.

"Stay BACK!" Shouted Scarlett as she shoved Trixie onto her rump back as a few guards moved between Edgar and the duo of magic users. "Keep that Unicorn away from him!" She commanded, rolling the shirtless human onto his back and started feel around his chest. After a bit more prodding, she seemed certain that she found the right area. "Okay, like a minotaur," She said as she started pushing down on his chest, trying to give CPR Chest compressions to the human. "Twinkle ~ Twinkle ~ Little ~ Star. Gotta ~ Give'em~ C-P-R." She sang to herself, pressing down with each word, keeping to the beat to try and keep it in rhythm. Pressing her ears into his chest, she listened to his breathing, heartbeat, anything that could give a clue to what was going on. While his heart rate was starting to slow down, it sounded like his lungs were hardly getting any air. As foam started to form again, she took her hooves off of Edgar and lifted his chin up, wiping away the foam from his mouth once more. Scarlett ripped off her helmet and mashed her muzzle against his lips, forming a seal as she tried to breath air into his lungs.

The sounds of many hooves galloping started to become louder and louder, as did the clangs of armor. From behind Trixie Lulamoon, both Luna and Celestia were galloped up to the scene with puffy red eyes.

Celestia frowned at the development before turning toward some guards that followed them. With a hoarse voice, she took charge of the situation. "You, fetch a medic team and a stretcher now! Twilight, what happened?"

"I don't know." The now-shaken Twilight admitted in nasally voice, looking up at Celestia. "He bumped into me and then he started running away from us! He was ignoring everything we were trying to say to calm him down, but he just kept running and running until he fell over!"

"What happened to you, Twilight? Your nose is bleeding." Celestia asked as her eyes narrowed, noticing the red drip now that Twilight was more concerned with the creature laying on the ground than she was with plugging her nose. Celestia did not get an answer due to Twilight's newfound friend suddenly ripping Celestia's attention toward her.

"What did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?" The crazed and hysterical Trixie yelled, rearing up on her hind legs and doing her best to shove Princess Celestia. The Alicorn did not budge an inch as Trixie felt herself sliding away from Celestia. Within a span of a second, the guards came to apprehend her with swords drawn before Celestia raised a hoof to stop them. She was looking upon Trixie as if a million thoughts were forming in her mind, but they were suddenly interrupted as if somepony broke her train of thought.

"Oh fuck." A tense outburst from the thestral who was previously performing CPR caught everypony's attention. Everypony turned to Scarlett, who was staring at Edgar's shoulder. "He's been bitten, right on his shoulder." She poked at fresh four scabs on the shoulder muscle near his neck, once previously covered by bandages. You can barely see red flesh contrasting against his pale skin.

Dread dawned upon the muzzles of every guard once this realization has occurred, as the hairs on their coat started to stand on ends. The princesses themselves seem to be shocked, with Twilight's jaw dropping upon hearing this as well.

Trixie was fearful of this news for a different reason. It appeared as everypony except Trixie knew what this meant, but with how horrified they were acting, Trixie's imagination ran rampant. The terror of the unknown of what could be happening has him left her in a dreadful suspense.

The Thestral Centurion known as Scarlett shook her head to snap herself out of this news, and was about to continue CPR until Princess Luna stopped her.

Princess Luna's movement was calm and collected, but her actions betrayed a sense of urgency. Her horn glowed as her immediately turned head turned toward a nearby stained glass window. As magic enveloped the entire window, she applied force inward toward the hallway ever so slightly. Any unicorn simply witnessing her that moment would have had the equivalent of roughly a few days worth of lessons in that one action, as her dexterity with magic was akin to a praying mantis striking. There was no wasted effort, and only speed and precision. The glass cracked and shattered, and each and every shard of glass landed neatly condensed on the floor near the window, not even clattering against the other thrown glass shards.

"There is no time for a stretcher!" Luna declared with urgency, trotting up to Edgar's unconscious form and started to hoist him up with her hooves, forming a cage around his midsection and beating her powerful wings as she started to lift him up into the air.

Seeing Luna start to grab at Edgar, Celestia gave a panicked gasp as her horn glowed.

"Luna DON'T!!!" She reached out, but was stopped as Luna's head whipped toward the Alabaster-white Alicorn.

"DON'T YOU DARREEEEE!"

Her glare containing almost primal hatred that both Princess Celestia, the solar guards, and the Lunar guards in the vicinity near her felt within their bones. Through barred teeth came what appeared to be a dire warning, as the reverberations of the Royal Canterlot yell pushed some of the smaller glass shards away from the pile. Celestia's hoof and the glow of her horn slowly receded, apprehension plastering her face, as shock was adorned on the faces of even the guards that were present.

With a mighty heave, Luna flew out the window with Edgar and suddenly dropped out of sight, coupled with the sound of glass breaking not too far below them.

As Twilight ran up to the window and poked her head out, she saw a broken window two floors down, indicating that Luna ended up crashing through another window below. As she turned to Trixie, she saw her galloping down a hallway to look for where Luna has taken Edgar, and followed her in pursuit...

As Princess Celestia watched the ponies scramble away in this situation, she caught her own guards looking her with confusion and trepidation. Upon dismissing them to the duties that were likely interrupted due to this event, she turned toward the Tea Parlor that this whole mess started from. Doubt started to gnaw at her, but she soon quashed it. This was right.

"My dear faithful student...My foolish misunderstood sister...Even you, Miss Lulamoon...I am so sorry, but it had to be done. I will protect you all from him...even if you end up hating me after all this is said and done..." Princess Celestia thought to herself as she started to sullenly walk to her guest room in Twilight's castle. "Perhaps one day, I can earn your forgiveness once he is gone, but until this time, I will be his shadow in the light. That demon will charm you with a smile...for a while, but in time? Nothing shall harm you all. Not while I'm still here."

Author's Note

Yooooo.. Wiki Wiki wazzup mah ponizzles.....

So, I am sorry in advance if this chapter is too dark or has a cry-baby feel to it. While writing it, I made sure to start writing when I am tired.

I am thinking ooooooone more cry-baby chapter before things start to look up...or maybe not. Maybe Edgar goes down the path of Guts and has nothing but bad days. Whose to say?

By the way, I am extremely lazy and not really good at constant editing. If you see something blatant that annoys you, message me so I can correct it.

Lastly, how do people feel about AI art in general?

Credits to Joan-Grace

Interlude: In the Gaze of the Sun...
View Online

The Greatest Performance

Interlude: In the Gaze of the Sun...

***Edgar's POV***
**Maple Grove Gynocology clinic**
*Afternoon*

"Such bullshit." I grumbled.

I was not in a good mood today. I was stuck with the duty of taking my mom to the gynecologist because, of all things, my dad decided that building a tunnel to Antarctica for his snow cone business was more important.

Yeah, you heard that right. Snow cones. In Antarctica. It make sense if he was sourcing the snow from there to sell here, but Minnesota is already snowy enough god damn it! Since I'm the only other person in the family with a license cause my mom doesn't trust muscle cars like my Mustang and my dad is half a planet away, guess who got voluntold to take her.

"Edgar, Language!" The thirty-seven year old Nicole scolded, silencing me almost immediately.

Oh yea, never introduced you to my mom. Please bear with me, this won't sound flattering at first.

Picture someone who looks like they could be the kindest, most gentle version of The Trunchbull from "Matilda". That's my mom, Nicole Jorgensen. She was a burly for a woman, when I was way younger and watched Matilda on VHS, I actually thought that was her pretending to be mean in the movie because both her build and her hairstyle was the exact same. I didn't know that she only picked that hairstyle because it was easy to do in the morning before going to work, but cut me some slack, I was like eight or something.

That's not to say that she couldn't be mean if she wanted to be. Our family often teased her and called her "The Mean-ager", since she fired soooooo many people from the restaurant she ran. She even fired somebody on Christmas one time, but it was completely justified. It was another manager who thought they could sneak their friends in after closing hours and help themselves to the copious amounts of alcohol for their own private Christmas party. She was notified of it at two in the morning and called them via cell to tell them not to come in at two-ten.

Anyway, she's only thirty-seven, but she looked as if she was in her late 40's. She had me when she was seventeen, just before she finished getting her GED. She was a bit young to be having kids, but that didn't stop her from carrying herself with the kind of authority that makes you think twice before stepping out of line. Her hair is this deep, charcoal black with very few strands of white hairs starting to make itself known(probably from the stress of being a restaurant manager). It was always pulled back into a tight bun like the Trunchbull on the top of her head. Never had a strand out of place, ever.

Despite that tough exterior, there's this sweetness to her. It's like she's the personification of a tough bear, but not the kind you'd run away from. Instead, she's more of a "Momma Bear" than anything, the kind you know will suplex a nuke for you, no matter what. Believe me, when she sets her mind to something, she's unstoppable, kind of like how she's taken on the task of forcing me to take her to the gynecologist because Dad's off chasing his snow cone dreams in Antarctica with my three little sisters!

My fucking luck I swear.

Anyway, the trip was a blur and we were already in the waiting room. Sitting behind the receptionist desk was a Alicorn of onyx fur and flowing indigo blue hair. A red cap with a white cross on it sat perfectly atop her head, its bright color a stark contrast to her coat and mane that shimmered like the night sky full of stars. It was a bit of a surreal sight seeing that not only a hat, but a sort of nurse's robe? It reminded me of something a nun would wear or an 1800's nurse, but for ponies.

"Mrs. Jorgensen for the two o'clock, we presume?" A voice that was unmistakably Luna's came out of her mouth, but it seemed to have a velvety richness to it. When she spoke, it was as if the very air in the reception room vibrated with the timbre of her voice, echoing off of the...everywhere, I guess. It was less reserved, but more Hello fly, welcome to my web type of vibe. I wasn't too concerned about her. She was still wearing a nurse's hat, so Hippocratic Oath and all that. "I'll take you to your waiting room. I don't have any other appointments scheduled to show up anytime soon." The mare walked from behind the desk and urged us to follow her.

Hmmm. Two o'clock. That's a weird coincidence...

As we walked down the hospital halls, she turned to my mom to strike up conversation. "Huzzah, I see you are a mare of quality. You prefer them young too?"

Flustered, my mom waved her off as we walked along side her. "No no no. This is my son, Edgar. He is taking me to the doctor since his father is preoccupied with his business trip to Antarctica. I don't trust myself with muscle cars, but those are all his dad ever bought."

"What a dutiful son. You must be very proud." Turning her Cerulean-slitted eyes to me, shooting off a knowing glance between the two of us.

"When he listens, yes."

"Mom, I'm right here, you know."

"Oh good. So you are listening." Mom teased.

Both the ladies laughed before the Alicorn who was totally not Nightmare Moon spoke once more. "Too prideful to let a little ribbing go unchecked, I see. We can relate." She stopped and turned toward an office door on her left. "Here we are. You will just need to wait inside. The doctor should be here in roughly ten minutes. It was lovely to meet you, Mrs. Jorgensen."

We both looked at the door with the following description stenciled in block lettering on the frosted glass.

ROOM 69

DR. JOHNATHAN S. , MD

BOARD CERTIFIED OBSTETRICS & GYNECOLOGY SPECIALIST

We started to walk inside, and as I started to pass the Alicorn, she pipped up again. "Oh, and Edgar...?" I turned toward to see what else she had to say. Those catlike slits locked with my eyes once more for a while as her smile started to get wider and wider. I found myself transfixed, unable to look away before she spoke again, breaking me out of my involuntary staring contest with her. "Got it ~ It was nice to finally speak with you, Edgar, although not as long as I would have liked. Come again soon. Doctor's orders..."

"Sure, likewise, I guess?" She turned and walked away out of view. I sat down on one of the plastic guest chairs in the Doctor's office, sighing out a breath of relief. "Holy fuck, she was weird! Did you see her eyeing me like a piece of meat the entire walk here? I have a hard time believing that Alicorn has ever been to medical school..."

"Oh, stop it. She seemed nice." Mom started poking at my ribs. "You might be able to get her number if you tried. Did you bring your rolodex with you?"

I sighed in annoyance. "No mom, I left it back in the Lucky 38 in New Vegas. You know this!"

"Oh, right. Mr. House was never happy that you chose to run Doom 64 on Victor. "

It was a good time. Luckily, if my utility droid T3-M4 was there to reactivate the elevators. Otherwise, I doubt I could have escaped back to the presidential suite to play Shrek 2 on my Xbox...

"Mrs. Jorgensen, I presume?" An older masculine voice inquired from the back of the room, a bald man walked in and shut the door behind him wearing in a physician's coat and a smug smile. As he turned, my eyebrows shot up and cocked themselves as I felt my muscles tense up. I recognized this fucker. That man was no doctor...

.
.

"No.....Absolutely fucking not." I stood up from my chair in a building rage.

The perverse porn-star never dropped that smug smiled, but rested his hands on his hips as he bent down to talk to me. As if he was patronizing me in front of my mom. "What is a matter, Sport? Is something wrong? Would a lollipop make things better? You can pick one up at the receptionist desk. Nurse Moonbutt usually has a stash in the cabinet that she thinks we don't know about." He winked at me as he nudge toward the door.

"Don't you give me that, you putrid pathological, pornographic pussy-pounding piss-ant! I know what you're here for! You are not doing any form of dentistry, gynocology, plumbing, coaching, mammograms, or anything like that with my Mom. Not while I'm here! She's not like the thots back on Pornhub. She's a good mom, you bald muscular prick! Fuck you!"

"She's a mom, and that makes her a MILF." The mocking gesture from Johnny Sins was dropped as his face took on a darker expression. "Mr. Jorgensen, if you don't leave the room and let me see to my patient, who is in dire need of my services, I may have to be required to call for security!"

*THWACK*

A solid fist landed squarely into the nose of the bald bastard, sending him spinning in a comedic fashion around the room before suddenly crashing out of view behind his desk.

"I Fuck-Tuple-Dog dare you, bitch!" I yelled, putting up my dukes and getting ready to metaphorically make him the bitch. "I ain't afraid of you. You tried threatening to put a remote explosive in my balls that would detonate if I failed No Nut November, but I failed on Day four and my balls are still here! I'm not fucking scared of you anymore! You're not my fucking Dad! YOU'RE NOT FUCKING MY MOM!" I yelled at him before whipping toward my mother, who was sitting and watching the whole ordeal in confusion. "Mom, lets get out of here." My Mom was transfixed at something, before pointing at the wooden desk that hid the winner of six different pornography awards. Turning back, I saw a hand rise from behind the wooden desk as it grasped the corner. An unamused and no worse for wear Bald man lifted himself up. "How are you still standing after that?!?" I asked in absurdity.

"Do you have any idea how rough my scenes can get?"

"...Yes."

"Then you really should have expected this..." Johnny Sins reached for the corded phone on his desk and pressed one button to call security on speed dial. "Yea, I have a Momma's boy that doesn't want his mom to get her interior examination. I have doctor-patience confidentiality I need to worry about, so do you mind if you play babysitter for a bit?" I sat back in my fighting stance, letting him do what he wanted for a reason I could not fully understand. "You can do whatever you want with him. Uh-huh. Yes. No, I don't really care. Got it. Uh-huh" Johnny Sins then turned toward me as his head twisted in an angle that most people would find uncanny."...See you soon, your majesty."

The fire behind my eyes was quickly doused by that statement, and his smile grew more sinister as he saw that I realized exactly who he called.

"No...No what the fuck did you just do?!?" My legs turned to Jell-O as they started to lose their strength. I stumbled backwards against the door that we entered from. With surgical precision, this walking meme cut out my attitude and signed my death certificate. "I-i'm sorry. I'll be good. I'll leave right now."

"You're free to walk out that door at any time now, Mr. Jorgensen." He offered, motioning to the exit behind me.

I turned toward the door I was leaning against, but froze as I started to hyperventilate. A voice and face obscured by the door's frosted glass spoke a horribly sweet voice with a horribly simple request.

"Look at me, Human."

The door knob to the office started to jiggle as a Golden glow enveloped it, and upon instinct I leaped for it and squeezed it as tightly as possible with both hands to hold it shut, but the glow didn't disappear. It didn't disappear. "No, no, no, no, no!" It took every ounce of strength I had to hold it shut, but I knew I wasn't going to last long. The door knob was twisting and forcing its way open against my grip. I was losing the battle to hold the door knob to stop it from opening. It was getting hot, and it was starting to burn...oh my god it burned, but I can't let go. I can't let her in.

From the gaps around the doors frame, hot steam billowed thorough and started to melt the wood surrounding it as the room filled with a thick fog. "OKAY, you win! I'm leaving. I promise, just tell her to go. PLEASE!"

"Oh, I can't stop her. I'm only hyu-man." Johnny Sins shrugged with a smug smile, walking over to my mother and massaging her shoulders. Even my own mother had a neutral expression as she watched me desperately struggle to hold the doors shut in a battle that I was desperately clinging onto. "Can you feel your heart burning Edgar? Can you feel that sinking sensation of knowing all the worst possible things she wants to do to you? And you can't do a damn thing to stop it? The fear within you is beyond anything your courage or mediocre wits can conquer. She's going to kill you Edgar, and you cannot fight back in a way that matters."

The knob suddenly stopped, and soon the door was begging to push open slowly. I slammed my shoulder into to shut it once more, but was suddenly flung back from the force of the door slamming back with twice the force I could have ever managed. I felt myself crash against the doctor's desk, as I looked onward at the figure behind the mists and steam. It was a White Alicorn with golden jewelry and magenta-colored eyes...those horrible horrible eyes.

"Look at me, Human..."

Stomp...

The eyes shined through the darkness like signals of my demise as I heard her getting closer and closer, cracking the tile as she drew near.

Dazed, I tried to stand up, but a magical aura engulfed me and held my arms tightly against my body in a blazing hot cocoon... and it burned. "What the hell is wrong with you?!? You're not supposed to be like this!!!" I pleaded with the entity, but saw no mercy from Celestia's eyes.

Only hatred. I desperately called out for somebody, anybody to help me. "MOM, HELP ME! MOOOM!"

"I'm sorry sweetie, I can't help you anymore. You're a world away from us..."

I turned toward her and saw only shadowy figures lurking in the shadows where my mom and the bald man was. All I could make out where their glowing magenta eyes. A pair of white hooves clamped themselves at the sides of my temple before cranking my head agonizingly slowly to face their owners. "Please no please no PLEASE NO!" Unable to move, unable to fight, I tried resisting with what little muscle my neck was capable of giving. There was nothing I can do. She was turning my head this slow on purpose. To build the anticipation like she was savoring this.

"I'M SORRY! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE HER STOP!" Even as I met with Celestia's horrible horrible eyes, all I could make out was hatred.

"Look at me, Human!"

Her eyes, unblinking magenta orbs glowing with an intensity that scorched my soul. They held no warmth or benevolence that the show portrayed. Not a single shred. I only saw hellfire. They were windows into an bright abyss, a chasm filled with a hatred so palpable, it felt as if it could physically rend me apart.

I couldn't even muster the ability to scream, only stare open jawed. Celestia herself did not speak any more, and simply stared...and hated.

The room, once filled with steam and the eerie glow of her magic, now seemed to start to fade to black. The office, my mother, the false doctor...they all started to melt away leaving me alone with Celestia. In the pitch black, I was trapped in an endless moment of scrutiny under Celestia's gaze. Time seemed to lose meaning as seconds stretched into minutes...stretching into hours. All that was left in the darkness were her eyes...

Those horrible horrible eyes.

"Shhhhhh...Shhhhhh..."

Chapter Ten: ...and the Embrace of the Moon
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Ten: ...and the Embrace of the Moon

Author's Note

Chapter Ten: Introducing seggs(NSFW)

Explicit content below.

This chapter may be a bit jarring(fair warning), maybe even rushed(going from one event straight to another).

Now, on to the story.

♬Nighttime sharpens, heightens each sensation
Darkness stirs and wakes imagination
Silently, the senses abandon their defenses...

Slowly, gently, night unfurls its splendour
Grasp it, sense it, tremulous and tender
Turn your face away from the garish light of day
Turn your thoughts away from cold, unfeeling light
And listen to the music of the night...♬-

~Music of the night
~Phantom of the opera

***Edgar's POV***
**Twilight's castle**

I awoke with a yelp as I felt my hands reflexively slap against my shut eyes, covering them. I can't remember what my nightmare may have been about, but I know it was a nightmare. I know how it felt.

"Shhhhhh...Shhhhhh..."

As I started to remove my hands, I let my eyes adjust to the darkness. I think I was still in Twilight's Castle, in the same room that I slept in earlier. This wasn't like when I first woke up though. I feel a heavy weight pressing down on me, like I'm trapped in a thick haze of molasses that muffles my thoughts and limbs. It's as if every movement requires a Herculean effort, and even the simplest actions seem daunting. But amidst the lethargy, there's an odd undercurrent of restlessness coursing through me, stirring up a strange cocktail of sensations. My heart hammers erratically in my chest, each beat reverberating through my veins like a drumbeat in a distant jungle. Even the cold sweat on my brow was dripping so slowly and deliberately that I thought it was playing red-light/green-light when I wasn't paying attention to it.

"Shhhhhh...Shhhhhh..."

But even through all of that, I felt strangely safe. There was a soft, melodious humming filled the space around him, gentle and soothing, like a balm to my frayed nerves.

"Shhhhhh...Shhhhhh." I finally started to register a woman's voice gently hush from my right, as well as something smooth brushing against my hair. Something that has been brushing against my hair. I felt humidity, hot and fresh with the smell of something warm and sweet washing over my face. What is that? Black Licorice? Before long, I heard the humming start once more. The lullaby was a slow, rhythmic melody, each note floating in the air with a tune that ebbed and flowed like ocean tides in the middle of the night. The light of moonlight and the calm of night. It felt like the gravity of the moon was gently pulling me, carrying with it a sense of peace and serenity.

"That voice..." I blurted out in my haze.

The humming stopped abruptly as the woman's voice broke the wordless song with a heavy breath. "You are finally awake...that's good."

I was keenly aware of the fact that something was holding me tightly, latched to my chest. When I tilted my head to the right, I saw a two glowing cerulean orbs staring back at me as I felt the grip get tighter around me. I gasped in surprise, and in my haze I tried to shake it off.

"Calm thyself. Tis only us, Edgar..."The barely visible pony lifted herself off of me and stood up near me, and a horn illuminated from her forehead. Suddenly, as the dull white light of the moon shined into the room. I couldn't see the moon from here, but I know its light was reflecting off the floor. As the light continued to slowly brighten up the room, I saw the silhouette slowly the brighten cerulean eyes that stared back at me with worry that their owner may have startled me. "Thou were plagued by a nightmare...a terrible one of which thou could not awake from."

"...Luna?" I called out before mentally kicking myself. It was a stupid question as Princess Luna's mane started to glow and glitter as constellations danced in them. I should have already guessed it was her. The song she was humming would have made it too obvious. Thankfully, Princess Luna did not seem to call it out, but what I did notice is that Luna was missing her crown. In fact, as I looked her up and down I saw that her collar and shoes have also gone missing. "Luna, why are you naked?" Princess Luna paused for a moment, looking at me in surprise before she suddenly snorted with a huff of laughter. "Hey, what's so funny?"

"Princess Twilight was right. You humans truly worship your clothing and modesty if that is the first thought upon awakening. We feel as if you and Generous Rarity may have much to debate in terms of attire..." Luna started to regain her composure as she wiped a mock tear from her eye. "It is good that you seem better, but we are not anymore 'naked' than anypony else in Ponyville. We simply removed our Royal Attire since we didn't want to scratch you with them."

"Okaaay? And why were you laying down with me again?"

"We can speak more of that later. First, we would like to know how you are feeling. Has the night terror subsided?" She inquired while looking me up and down. She seemed to be paying very close attention to me, or maybe looking for something? As for her question...

I don't really remember what my nightmare was about or that I was even having one, but if Luna said I was, I guess it would track with how I am feeling right now.

I rubbed my forehead and eyes as as I started to wake up a bit more. I don't think I have a headache anymore but...

"I don't know...I feel...A lot of things right now." I said with a drained voice. It's as though my body is caught in a perpetual state of heightened awareness and dull haze, every nerve tingling with a heightened sensitivity that borders on overwhelming. Even the slightest brush of felt blanket against my skin sent shivers down my spine. Even the air feels different against my skin, electrifying and charged with an almost tangible energy, and the smells... Every breath Princess Luna takes is laden with a heavenly aroma, tantalizing and intoxicating in its potency... God, if I'm feeling anything, "like a creep" is on the list. It's hard to make sense of it all, and it feels like I was drugged or had my drink spiked. This is more than just me being drowsy. Though I don't feel like I have a headache, I think I would have preferred the headache from yesterday to what I am feeling right now. Even now, there is like a sort of primal flame pulsing beneath my skin, igniting an ardor that flickers and dances with an intensity I can't quite comprehend. It's a raw, animalistic desire that coils and twists within me, urging me to seek out... something.

I was broken out of my thoughts as Princess Luna sat up on a couch that was not there when I woke up. When did she move that next to my bed?" Her horn glowed once more, and two candles lit up illuminating a serving cart. Using her magic, she appeared to pour a multitude of concoctions from bottles and pots that had aromas I can smell from here into one of the wine glasses. I could see half of the wine glass having coffee being poured into one, but this was followed by another bottle of an inky-black substance being poured into it. As it was being poured, I recognized an the sweet smell of licorice.

"Do you take whipped cream with your coffee? We know it may be a bit late for it, but you will need to be awake for this." Luna took a sip of the drink with her eyes closed, as if to thank it for being so tasty.

"Sure. Coffee sounds really nice right now..." I agreed, tiredly as I still tried to wake myself. In another wine glass, she poured black coffee, though she did not add any of the blacker liquid from earlier.

"We might as well live on coffee alone, but on occasion, we like to add Sambuca to ours as a comfort. Have you ever tasted it?" I shook my head. "It's a liqueur made from Anise. It is not enough to intoxicate us, but we enjoy it. Wouldst thou like to partake?"

I gave it some thought, but was still skeptical of it. "It smells nice, but I don't want to waste a cup if I don't like it." I told her.

As Luna was mid-sip of hers, she stopped and looked at me with a strange look in her eyes before gingerly grabbing her wine glass with her hooves and holding it toward me. "You can have a taste from my glass if you would like." I looked at the glass without moving my hands toward it, testing the waters of whether or not I should. "Please, we do not mind sharing, though it may be a bit strong for you since it makes up half." She insisted with a fair warning. I guess I shouldn't be rude.

"Thanks..." I said as I grabbed hold of her wine glass full of alcoholic coffee. Weird choice to drink coffee from, but I wasn't going to complain. I looked at Luna once more before she nudged her hoof at me in encouragement.

It had a rich and robust flavor. It still had the boldness of black coffee along with sweet and aromatic notes of this "Sambuca", creating a perfect balance of bitterness and sweetness without the sweet being overpowering or unpleasant. I could taste a strong flavor of Licorice in the back of my mouth as the aroma served to put my mind at ease. She was right, it was very strong. Are all ponies as big into alcohol as Trixie was the night I met her? Still, it is certainly too strong for me for a glass that large.

I offered her wine glass back to her. "It's really good, but a little strong for me. Maybe if there was a bit less in my coffee?"

"...Of course." Luna smiled tenderly at this before her magic went to work, grabbing at a multitude of items in the cart. Working with the deftness of a skilled barista, she threw together a coffee-based cocktail that she offered to me with her own hooves.

If I thought that the original drink was alright, this was nothing compared to the masterwork she created in the span of a few seconds. It was still a bit difficult to see in this low light, but I could tell it would put an unskilled bartender to shame. A Midnight black liquid mixture of the coffee and sambuca was at the bottom with foamy whipped cream scooped onto the top of it to cap it. On top of that, I could see and smell it was dusted with cinnamon, complete with a cinnamon stick sticking out of it as a garnish. Seeing all of that, I can see exactly why she choose wine glasses for its presentation. It was very thoughtful and it made the entire drink a work of art.

Upon the first sip, it turned into my shot-gunning it with gusto. The taste was fantastic, and probably the best thing I had since I came to Equestria. Heck, it was probably the best drink I ever had, on par with Orange Julius and Horchata.

"Seems as if thou enjoyed it somewhat." I heard Luna stifle a giggle as she pointed at the side of her face. I licked the whipped cream off the corner of my mouth, with a bit of embarrassment that I downed it that fast. "We are fine with our coffee, but we thought you could do well with some libations and comforts of your own after what happened earlier. It is nice to see thee smile."

"What do you mean by that?" I felt a sinking sensation in my gut after hearing that. "Is Ponyville alright? Did something else happen while I was sleeping?"

Luna stopped her sip before looking back at me with an unreadable expression before her gaze suddenly softened. Out of nowhere, a small espresso cup appeared from behind the serving cart and made itself manifest as Luna began filling it to the brim with Sambuca before grasping it with her hooves. "It may be difficult if thou art inexperienced, but I ask that you please finish the entire cup before we continue go further. The quicker you do it, the easier it will go down." I took the makeshift shot of Sambuca from her hooves and with a bit of hesitation did what she asked. I had wine before, courtesy of the Great and Powerful Trixie and that was definitely easier than I thought, but this was another beast entirely with nothing else mixed into it. It tasted much like spicy licorice juice, but I was able to down it even if it wasn't with a straight face. It was good, but a bit strong for me. "Thank you. Now, what is the last thing you remember?"

I started to feel a bit of a tingle in my face from the alcohol, but that did not distract me. "You didn't answer my question. What about Trixie or Twilight? Ponyville?"

Luna's neutral expression did not waver, but she did pause for some reason. "...Ponyville is better than it was yesterday, as are Princess Twilight Sparkle and Miss Trixie Lulamoon. However, we ask that you please focus. What happened before you had awoke from your slumber?"

I felt my muscles start to relax a bit after hearing that. Obviously nothing that bad if everypony is okay. Wait, everybody. Shit, I'm even starting to use the show's lingo now. "Okay, well I remember going to meet with you guys. There was a bat pony that I saw that was the same one from the fields. I told you a story about Batman, and I had some oatmeal...then you left to see something about visitors, and-" The dull ache that throbs persistently behind my eyes started to hurt. It's like a relentless pressure that refuses to abates. "Whats..."

"Look at me, Human."

"I'm sorry..." The words slipped out of my mouth as I dropped the espresso cup, but luckily a dark blue glow enveloped it before it could either stain the bedsheets or shatter on the ground. Memories of Celestia's warnings started to flood back.

She was going to kill me. I saw it in her eyes...I have to get back home. Where is she? I need to leave, before she comes back. Before she gets me alone with her agai-

My thoughts were interrupted as almost instantly the cup seemed to teleport away somewhere before I felt a hoof pull my face to meet with Luna's eyes. "Edgar, look upon us. Focus on our voice." I felt her other hoof on my right thigh, slowly stroking it in a calming manner. "So long as the night remains my domain, no harm shall befall thee. You are safe."

"Y-you shouldn't be touching me. If you are laying next to me like that, people might start to get the wrong idea between us." I pulled her hoof away from my face. Her touch...it was calming, soothing even. Everywhere she touched left tingles, but something in the back of my mind was screaming that it was wrong. Not just because she is from a TV show, but because of what would happen if I was caught with her.

She shook her head, not breaking her eye contact with me. "We had not choice even before you awoke. You were shaking in your dreams much as you are right now. We could not peer into your dreamscape and help as we can with others... It pained us to see thee in such a state. We only hope that we could provide respite as we lied beside thee." Luna did take her hooves off of me, and in a near instant another espresso cup full of the inky black liqueur levitated in front of me. I looked back at Luna only to find that she was doing the best that she could to give me puppy dog eyes. "Please, one more for good measure...for us?" She didn't need the puppy dog eyes to convince me, but it was a strong force multiplier anyway. Once more I downed the Vantablack vintage, though with considerably less resistance than before. My fingers were starting to get a bit tingly, but I can still think clearly. Offering the cup back to Luna, she smiled once more as she took it back in her grasp. I saw her mouth the words "thank you" to me in the flickering candlelight.

I pulled the blanket up a bit further, I felt soft fabric brush against me, and came to a startling realization that I was naked. Really naked. More so than just being naked normally, as I can still feel that I am wearing my socks and shoes. HOW LONG HAVE I BEEN NAKED?

I never needed the coffee. I was now wide awake and panicking.

"LUNA, WHY AM-" I was silenced as a dark blue hoof pressed against my mouth, muffling my complaints.

"Sir Edgar, it is many hours into the night, and most the castle is sleeping, baring the night staff. Please lower thine voice." Luna requested with a stern look. I suppose it was fair enough for her to chastise me for freaking out for something as teensy and insignificant as having my dick out for the entire world to see...DID I HAVE A BONER THE ENTIRE TIME WHAT THE FUCK?!?

"Luna, why the hell am I naked? Where are my pants? Where is my underwear?!?" I whispered harshly, shifting the blanket up a bit further over me to touch my chin, forming a tent to conceal my raging hard-on. "I'm dressed like Sonic the Hedgehog!"

Go down, damn it! I really do not need to flash the Princess of the night with my absolutely massive not-average wiener. Not that I'm insecure or anything, no nonono. Its just that i'd probably be put on like nine different lists if she sees it, and I don't know if my ears can take any more of her Royal Canterlot voice if she screams from the sight of it.

"Forgive us Edgar, but we had to remove them from you. We found that we were not as thorough as we should have been when we first inspected you for your injuries. Are you perhaps cold? Your hands have not moved from your erection for the past few minutes." She innocently asked as she pointed at my hips . The realization that she knew I had one lurking under the covers was jarring to say the least, and I did my best to avoid eye-contact as heat rose to my face.

"I'm sorry."

As if she suddenly gained insight to my plight, Luna's ears perked up. "You're trying to hide it. Is this taboo for humans?"

"...Yeah. We don't really show off our genitals to people unless you worked for Nickelodeon or were planning on getting arrested. It's embarrassing, and I don't want to be getting a boner around you. Not when yo-" I'm Just gonna stop myself right there. I don't want to embarrass Luna with the implications. "I'm sorry about that."

"You shouldn't apologize so much. We can tell you must be flustered, but you needn't worry. There is nothing shameful about thine body." She did her best to reassure me, but it wasn't really making me feel any better about it. Apart from the personal space issues these ponies seem to have, I guess a lot of human concepts would seem silly to them. Luna let me stew in the awkwardness of the moment in silence, her mouth opening and closing as if deciding what other way she could possibly say as she tapped her hooves together in front of her. No doubt about to say something about ponies not needing to wear clothing or that she wouldn't likely judge me for being naked. "Edgar...If you were given a choice, would you lay with a pony if they had asked you to...intimately? Or if it was the difference between life and death?"

...or not.

"W-what did you say?"

"What circumstances would it take for you to consider having coitus with a pony?" Luna repeated herself, using a more clinical and direct term that hopefully would not leave room for misunderstanding. She looked up and to the right, as if taking another moment to think about how to word things more tactfully, I assume. "...Sex."

THAT WAS EVEN MORE DIRECT THAN THE LAST SENTENCE!

"I know what "coitus" is, it's just that...its just, I-uh...hehe wow. I didn't know you liked pranks..." I lied, knowing full well that she liked them from her Nightmare Night episode. "Breaking the ice again, I guess. Good one. You almost had me for a second, trying to get a rise out of-No, very poor choice of words." No smile from Luna, and she simply looked on as if to study my gaze. "Princess Luna, you aren't smiling. Why aren't you smiling?"

"We are not speaking in jest. We are deathly serious." Luna stated in no uncertain terms as she leaned to my direction. Once she was certain she had my full attention, which she abso-fucking-lutly did after that, she continued. "This was a difficult topic to broach, so forgive this for being so sudden. We had awaited for you to wake up so we could explain ourselves, but there is no longer any time for details. It is fortuitous that we may explain ourselves, but had we waited any longer, we may have been forced to make you ejaculate during your sleep...and beg for your forgiveness when you awake." Almost immediately after Luna finished that admission, she reached over and started to stoke my upper leg again with her hoof. This time they seemed slower. Deliberate, as every stroke, she got closer and closer to my waist as if testing the waters.

I felt a blush start to overtake in my face. I pinched myself on the arm and after a sharp sting I knew that I wasn't dreaming and that this was real. With that realization, I felt my little Judas of a prick twitch a bit at that. This did not go unnoticed by the now-smiling Alicorn, a tinge of passion making itself known behind her eyes.

"This prospect excites you Edgar? It must, at least somewhat." Luna sounded almost relieved as she continued the amorous conversation. "Tis true that you may be a rare creature yourself, but there is only one other living soul that can claim they have carnal knowledge of an Equestrian Princess. We should consider ourselves very lucky, shouldn't we?" As she spoke, Luna was practically purring as she was slowly stroking my leg. Her voice was starting to take on a seductive quality, as if she were trying to get me to see things her way.

Luna leaned in closer to my face, but I leaned away, if you could call the small tilt I did a lean. I was practically frozen stiff like I was a deer caught in the headlights of a truck, and Luna was that truck.

"This is a hell of a topic to segway into after I just woke up." I mentioned, still not sure if she was joking or not. "Seriously. Where did that come from? You're not...you don't actually like me, do you?"

After a few moments, her smile started to falter and her voice lowered to a hush. "Forsooth, tis not a matter of loving you as one would their partner. We believe we have a better understanding of your encounter with Queen Telsona..."

Oh...

"Oh..." I looked away from her in reflex, but ended up staring at the grassy hills that were just barely in view off to the distance. Kind of coincidental that I fought her there. I thought back to Queen Telsona's "mood switch" and her ultimatum. If Luna hadn't saved me from her back then with her uncanny timing, I would have had to accept her "terms". To be taken back and hopefully not be murdered. I just hope Luna doesn't think I'm some sort of sex fiend. I wouldn't have had a choice but to say yes, at least to make the queen believe me. "...Exactly how much do you know about that?" I sheepishly inquired.

Luna's hoof softly landed on the side of my chin and guided my gaze back to her. Her look seemed somber, yet reassuring as she continued to brush her hoof across the hair on my side. The same hoof continued to trail down my neck to my shoulder, resting where I felt a sore thumping from where Telsona bit me.

"Enough to understand, brave Sir Edgar. Don't think about her now. All you need to know is that when Telsona bit you, you became envenomed; We wish we had more time to wake you, but it took long for thee to awaken, so there is little left..." Luna took in a deep breath through her nose. "To save you from her accursed taint, you must have coitus with us. You may...succumb to it otherwise."

"Succumb? You mean I'll-" Luna slowly nodded at me, answering my question before I could finish. If it wasn't for the blush I was feeling, the color would have drained from my face. "Couldn't I just jerk off?" I ask, prompting a head tilt and a raised eyebrow from Luna. "...you know...masturbate in a corner somewhere like some goblin?"

She shook her head. "No. I am sorry Edgar, but no matter how vivid your imagination may be, your body would know the truth. You would not be able to release nearly enough seed to exhaust the venom in time."

I was still having a hard time believing her, but what she said has to be true. I have been feeling awful, and very VERY weird since I woke up. Now that I think about it, it all started ever since I got bit. I was mostly fine until now, with a few headaches and such, but ever since I met with Luna and Celesti-

"...Do not give me a reason to come back and take you back to Canterlot myself, because I promise you will be looking for one."

I swallowed hard as I felt trapped.

My stomach churned. It felt like a trap, no matter which way I turned.

"I still can't do it even if you are offering. Celestia made it very clear that-" I paused as my breath hitched. If Celestia finds out, who knows what will happen to me? This really sucks...

I shook my head at Luna. "I don't want to cause problems, for you or me. I made a promise to Celestia."

"...She gave us permission to help you."

"What?"

"Your life is in mortal danger, and as cruel as she was acting, she doesn't want harm to befall you! Not when you were only bitten during your valiant efforts."

"Wait, so Celestia all of a sudden okay with me?" Luna nodded her head. "She is okay with you doing this?" She nodded again, a bit more quickly this time. "She doesn't want death or to turn me into mincemeat?"

Even faster, she shook her head as if to convince me. "She never did. She wanted you scared of possibly harming her ponies, she had no idea that the venom was coursing through you. Its effects on your body and your initial fear induced a panic attack and you fainted in the halls as you ran from us."

It still doesn't make sense!

"You're joking..."

"It isn't a joke, Edgar!" Princess Luna raised her voice since she was apparently starting to get annoyed with me. "What part of "deathly serious" and "mortal danger" do you not understand?"

"Can you really blame me though? This is...nuckin futz. That's a good way of putting it." I was struggling to find the right words for how I was feeling at that moment, but my brain felt fried. "None of this makes sense. Why is Celestia suddenly okay with me doing this with you? Why are you even the one doing this! You're a princess, right? Isn't this something a uh-" I cleared my throat."..."Professional" should be handling?"

"We can't ask anypony else to help you. Though you have shown good will towards us, you have proven to be powerful and dangerous being. We would sooner risk ourselves rather than somepony that could not protect themselves against you." she held up her two hooves in placation. "Not that we think you would hurt us intentionally, but it is a precaution we must take. While you slept, our sister even offered to help you with the venom coursing through you, but we felt this would not have been appropriate after how she had horrified thee. She felt just horrible about the whole situation, and now that she knows you were bitten, she left the burden unto us to help you."

I felt mix of relief and disbelief as I heard those words. I let out a sigh as my heart started to slow a bit as I started to think more about it. It was still a bit difficult to piece those events together, but I felt calmer about everything now.

Celestia wanted to help me after all...? Was there actually a heart behind those eyes?

After all of those threats she made, all of those promises I made, they're all swept under the rug. Just like that?

Regardless, it didn't change the fact that Luna was put in a tough position because of me in the first place. It doesn't seem fair to her...I'm not dangerous, so she shouldn't be the only one to help me.

"I don't know Luna. A Princess offering herself is medieval! I don't feel comfortable with you being forced to do this. This all just sounds like a poor excuse for me to have sex when anyone else could help me."

Luna shook her head with a groan as if to chastise herself. "Fine. Perhaps "burden" was the wrong word to use. Edgar, we want to help you. We really do, but we need thee to want this as well. We wouldn't be beside thee if this was a falsehood. Why art thou so resistant?!?"

"Is there really nothing else we can do? Like, cut a hole in a warm cantaloupe or an apple pie or something?"

Luna paused with her eyebrows raised in disbelief. "Apple pie...?"

"Look, I saw it in a movie once. It was a comedy, but there has to be some merit to..." I joke when I am uncomfortable about something. That's just how I am. However, I knew that it would have been a good idea to shut the fuck up when I saw Princess Luna's face, and my own uneasy smile dropped.

"I-I see then. We should have known, but it hurts all the same." Luna sniffed during that stutter. "You've been opposed to it the moment it was suggested. Twilight's notes said that you only went into relations with others of your kind, and we see more clearly now...We ponies-*hic*" She turned away from me, toward the balcony where the moonlight was coming in from. She took an involuntary intake of air while trying to maintain her composure. I could have sworn I saw a tear as she choked breathes out. "We ponies are truly so different to you that we are none too dissimilar from beasts, aren't we? Are we so hideous to you that you would rather fornicate with a Fruit? A pastry??? Would you rather die then spend a night with us?" As Luna lowered her head into her hooves to cover her eyes, her slender frame shuddered silently with the only noise being her quiet sobs and the ruffle of the feathers upon her shuddering wings.

Fuck, stop doing that. Stop pissing off the mares and stop upsetting Princess Luna! The fuck is wrong with you? They don't get Earth references, and this isn't the time to be joking around. If people found out you made Fluttershy cry, you would be flogged with a rusty chain, let alone Luna.

"Nonono Luna, it's not that, really! I just don't want to take advantage of you, so I'm just trying to find another way around this. I swear, I'm joking because I'm not feeling comfortable about this."

STOP IT!

I caught myself and tried to justify. "You know, This! The th-thing, the situation, not you! This was a bad time to be joking, and I'm sorry. Just please stop crying..."

Even in her dismay with her face buried in her hooves, Luna maintained a dignified grace. She was quiet for a time before taking a deep breath, she broke her silence once more. "Edgar, I want to try something. Close your eyes and listen to my voice..."

"Lun-"

She interrupted me. "Please, Edgar..."

...

I closed my eyes as she asked. I heard a fwoosh and felt a breeze against my skin as I laid there in darkness. I didn't hear the wax from the candles bubbling and crackling from the flames. Instead, I heard only Luna's voice.

"I want you to forget everything that has happened for now. Instead, I want you to imagine that you have awakened in a land unfamiliar to you. This is not the land you find yourself in now, but rather in another place in time. It might be similar to Equestria, and it might not be. All that matters is how you feel. It is full of beauty and wonder...and other humans. Maybe even races that look like humans but are friendly all the same."

I laid there with my eyes closed and tried to think of a place like she asked...and as I did, I started to hear a somber and nostalgic melody. It was very quiet. I could barely hear it, but I could recognize it anywhere...

It was from the Legend of Zelda games. This was Princess Zelda's theme. Even if I didn't recognize this version, I would recognize its motifs in a heartbeat. Anyone who has ever save Zelda in their childhood or played another game would.

"Can you see it now Edgar?" I nodded toward Luna. "Where art thou?"

As I heard the harp playing in the background...I had one thought.

"Hyrule..." I finally settled on. " I used to play games based in the land of Hyrule called "the Legend of Zelda"."

"Hyrule..." Princess Luna repeated. "I can hear its music....tell us about it."

"It's beautiful. Its a mystical land blessed with deep forests. Giant mountains that could take days to climb . Serene lakes from a domain whose water ripples are melodious, a barren desert that whisper tales of honor and deceit, hiding both salvation and damnation. Jaw dropping cities, tranquil villages, and many ancient puzzles hidden throughout. It is not without danger, but neither is a rose with its thorns. I spent my childhood here, and no matter how much may change, the more it stays the same. It is like it never loses its magic. It was a made-up world, but it was real to me..."

I can't believe those words came out of my mouth without me having to read them... I suppose it helps that I had so many fantasies of being in Link's shoes, being a hero of courage and helping those that need it. Always being able to find solution to daunting odds.

I guess I got what I wished for when I arrived in Equestria. When I came to Ponyville with Trixie in the first place. But Link wouldn't be as scared as I am, right? Things would work out for him in the end because they had to. I can only "act" like a hero because of what I saw from movies, games, and TV shows. I only know what I think a hero is like, even when I played a hero or a villain in a play, but I never really had to struggle until now. I was able to skirt by on some dumb luck so far, but can I continue to do so? Do I even want to continue this act?

Luna's voice hummed in contentment, shattering my train of thought as I felt a hoof brush against face. "You had a smile for a time. It must have been a sight to behold, and you must have had many joyous memories there. Does it have castles?"

"Yes."

"Does Hyrule have Princesses that live in these castles?"

"...a few..."

"I see...Please think of one whose beauty enraptures your thoughts. What is her name, Edgar?" I didn't hear any sadness in Luna's voice anymore, and while it seemed stoic she did seem interested in what I had to say.

The answer was obvious.

"Zelda, her name is Princess Zelda."

"A pretty name...What does she look like?" Luna asked.

That's a harder question to answer. Most of the time, she's blonde. Other times, she's brunette.

"She looked different depending on the story being told every form may change depending on the way the story is told. Her looks didn't matter, since her fate is always the same. She and a courageous knight always stand together to battle the forces of evil. Though things may seem bleak and insurmountable, they always find some way to win and save the land of Hyrule...together." That's one theme that the Zelda games always stuck with while I was playing them. If Ganon was the villain, he would always be thwarted when Link and Zelda worked together in their final battle. No matter what, they were fated to take him down together.

"And this time was no different. With the help of this Princess, you have saved this land of Hyrule from a vile force. While a new foe may once again rise one day, the foals of this world get to live in peace for a time free of fear. As you laid in a bedchamber of Hyrule Castle after a long-earned rest, you awaken to find a certain Princess laying besides you. How did she make you feel, again?"

There was a pause on my part. I was starting to get lost in the fantasy Luna was creating for me, and before I could answer, it seemed as if Luna already had her in mind. I felt a depression in the bed, and this signaled that she moved from her spot on the couch to my bed.

"That's right, Edgar... She is exactly what you imagined her to be. Her name is Princess Zelda, and she is Human princess. She is everything you have ever dreamed of, and you loved her almost as much as she loves you...She had long, flowing hair that seemed to float in a breeze. Her silvery voice was what you woke up in the morning to hear. You could have sworn that the sun rose if only to hear her sigh in the wind." I felt a hoof start to trace circles in my chest from behind the comforter, before moving it's way down and start to run across my abdomen. "She had a motherly attitude to those ponies that would need it, and a fierce heart to those she felt deserved it. She was a fantastic teacher, and had an eye for seeking out those of great potential. That is how you two met, after all."

hold on...

"All the Humans in Hyrule loved her smile in the daylight she ruled over, but her smile seemed to be brightest tonight as she lied there with you." Luna's hoof started to reach lower and lower, starting to just barely graze the line between my abs and pelvis as I felt her lips just barely tickle my right ear as she started to whisper. "Princess Zelda, who wants nothing more than to share this one night with you, is a human female...a gorgeous human female. She is possibly the most beautiful mare thou hath ever lane eyes on, and she is here for thee. Perhaps she wants to do her best to reward her champion with more than a simple kiss. With something only she can bestow upon you. More than her body, she wants to give all of her love, her heart, to her beloved. Humble to a fault, thou aren't sure she is making the right choice, but she is. More than anything, she wants thee to live for her sake, and she wants thee to feel Elysium. For at least one night, one magical night, there were no nightmares within the lands of Hyrule...only dreams."

I felt a soft set of lips gently brush against mine before leaving a peck on them. I didn't think I could blush any harder, but the tingly sensation in my face grew intense. "Luna!" My eyes started to shoot open before I felt a hoof drape across them.

"Keep thine eyes closed Edgar, and lose thyself in this dream." My heart was pounding as I felt her lips continue to tickle mine as she whispered. "This night... I am Princess Zelda, and I am still in love with you as the day I met you, my champion..."

I felt her start to leave light kisses on my face which slowly trailed down to my neck. The comforter that I was covering myself with was being pulled down, leaving more and more of my body exposed. It felt nice... but off. Wrong.

I hesitated a bit, but I swallowed my nervousness and placed a hand on the hoof that was covering my eyes. "Luna..." I asked, breaking the illusion she was trying to give me."...are you pretending to be "Princess Zelda"? Or are you pretending to be somepony else?" I felt her pecks stop, and her lips leave my collar bone. She gave no answer other than her silence...

I gently took her hoof and removed it from my eyes. Luna was looking at me with a sadness that...No, I've seen this look before back in my acting classes, or something like this. This was a face that other seniors and Alumni would have when they wanted to portray...worthlessness? It was a somber look of someone who was not good enough and knew it. Someone who thought that they weren't worth it. Wasn't worth the love of another... I swallowed hard. I NEEDED to fix this. "Frankly, I'd feel more comfortable with you than "Princess Zelda"."

Luna looked away from me, hiding her face behind her starlit hair. "E-Edgar, close your eyes. We want to help you, but we can't if you only see us an animal."

"Did you not hear a word I said earlier? I don't see you as an animal. You're Princess Luna. I'm the different one. Judging from everyone else's questions and reactions, I am the only human who has ever stepped foot in Equestria. I'm practically a hairless monkey and by all accounts the closest thing to an animal in this castle." I continued.

"Bu-but-" Luna sputtered, but I nipped her protest in the bud.

"Luna, I need to say this." Luna stayed quiet, and seeing that she was giving me a chance, I took a deep breath with an intent to not waste it. "It sounds like you already know this, but Queen Telsona threatened me...threatened to turn me into "a love toy" of hers and her sisters. There are some guys back in my world that would have killed to be in that position, and I thought I was one of them until she actually started talking. Until I saw what she tried doing to Apple Bloom. I feel disgusted with myself for even fantasizing about that kind of thing...She scared me, but you don't." Luna's breath hitched as I saw a hoof go to her face, presumably to cover her mouth. I couldn't see what face she was making, but I can't let that distract me.

"I was losing that fight badly, but you saved me from Telsona. You didn't have to come out to help me, but you did." I reached for her face, and Luna did not shy away. "You helped Pipsqueak and personally took him to Twilight's castle to get treated. You didn't have to do that yourself, but you did." I brushed her hair off to the side, and as she turned to face me, I caressed the side of her cheek with my hands. She didn't shy away as she looked into my eyes.

"Even now, you have been arguing with me for a while; To convince me to let you pleasure me. That's ridiculous, and you never should have had to do that. You could have just left me alone and hoped that I would get better, but you still are doing your best to save my life at the cost of your own innocence and modesty."

I swallowed hard, hoping that what I said next could finally get the message across.

"Luna, after everything I have seen you do, how could I ever see you as an animal and anything but incredible? How can I look at you as anything less than my friend?" I asked her, wiping the tear away from the corner of her eye.

Luna said nothing as her eyes darted between me and the hand that was caressing her cheek. I pulled my hand away from her, thinking I went too far.

"Shit, did I make it weird? I'm sorry, I just wa-" Luna took the hoof that previously covered her mouth and placed it over mine, shutting me up. She gave a warm smile as her eyebrows furrowed in faux annoyance.

"Trixie was right about you. Thou sayeth kindest words one could imagine, only to do thine best to ruin the moment with something foolish." Luna removed her hoof again from my mouth before leaning into me.

"...You know what, that's fair. I guess I'm trying to say that I'd like to give it a try." I agreed, now gently patting her head since I was unable to think of anything else I could do to comfort her. We all sat in silence once more. Just her, myself, and my raging erection that was thankfully not bothering me during my entire apology. Sadly enough, I heard the music in the background start to fade away, leaving only the sound of our breathing. "Man, I suck at talking about these things."

"We shall simply have to put our mouths to better use, won't we?" Luna suggested as she leaned further toward me. She took in a deep breath through her nose, closing her eyes as if taking in my scent. I felt her trail her hooves down my chest, leaving a tingling sensation as she went before stopping short at my hips. "Hast thou ever had thine cock sucked?"

If someone was recording me that moment, they could have made a sick beat-box video from the sounds I made at that question.

"LUNA! I thought we were having a heart-felt moment!" I stammered. "I can't deal with those questions out of nowhere!"

A smug chuckle came from behind that smile she wore. "Your face is red...practically a beacon in my moonlight. We shall assume the answer is no..." She nuzzled her muzzle into my neck. "There is one thing thou is mistaken of...we are not innocent or modest." Princess Luna admitted with a provocative wink and taking back control of the situation.

With that admission out of the way, Luna began her descent as she slowly slid her body down, her fur gliding across my bare skin and across my erection, causing a relieved sigh at the stimulation.

Holy fuck is this really happening right now?

"We hope thou art not disappointed if we are lacking practice." She took a hoof and traced it across my penis, electing a sigh with a shudder of anticipation. That felt way better than I was expecting. She then took her other hoof to catch my member between her hooves and her body, hugging my penis against her fluffy chest. Slowly rising as she brushed her fur against my member, she pulled back. All the while, her wings were bent downward and resting their feathers on my thighs as just barely tickled the skin like a feather duster. She didn't have any breasts on her chest, so would this be a chest-job? Whatever it was, the way her tufts of fur on her chest caressed me was amazing.

"Uhhhh-" I moaned instinctually before clasping my mouth shut to stifle it much to my chagrin.

This was nuts! She's barely touching me and I'm having trouble holding back moans. I thought this was just a thing that porn did for fantasy. This wasn't even the mythical "sex" I heard so much about, but it felt way better than any time I ever got myself off.

Her ministrations with something so simple were starting to take a toll on me, much to her apparent enjoyment as she saw me trying to stifle my whimpers and trying to gauge my reactions.

"Thou needn't do that...Thou art afflicted by changeling venom. It makes everything unbearable. It's natural to want to make these sounds. It tells us that thou art enjoying it, and we want to hear more of thee..." Rising slowly, dropping fast. Rising slowly, Dropping fast. Up and down. Up and down as she pressed herself against me. "Now that the music has subsided, we would like to hear thee sing..." Her voice dripping of a sensual seduction, and I still could not believe I wasn't dreaming right now. Princess Luna was a straight-up succubus.

She then angled my penis downward a little bit as it rested in front of her lips, breathing hot humid air over it as she gave an experimental lick to it. Her lips form a seal upon the very tip of my penis where my hole was, not placing the head in her mouth. She held it there to get more comfortable as she set her forehooves on either side of my hips. Looking back up at me, I felt her tongue poke and prod at the entrance...then lap at it.

"mmmn-god Luna," I sucked in air through my gritted teeth as I felt myself involuntarily buck my hips to no avail since I was being held down by her. Luna giggled as her head moved further down with confidence. I felt her tongue swirl around the head of my penis, slowly and deliberately wrapping her tongue as if to polish my head. Once coated, she started to move down... down... down as she lovingly bobbed her head, her eyes moving between judging her own performance and meeting with mine to judge if I was enjoying it. She let my cock out of her mouth for a moment to hold the bottom against her lips. Her tongue poked out and wiggled left and right against the underside of my head, and those eyes...Those half-lidded wanton eyes that were trying to get me to cum all on their own...What a sexy expression. Why is she so hot!?! Using one of her hoof, she pulled her hair back behind her ears to give me a better look at her face and how much she was enjoying it, and I got a better look at her tongue as it wrapped around me. It was long, definitely longer than mine by at least an inch or two. I saw as she bobbed her head, her tongue stuck out to caress either side of my shaft in alternating patterns. Even if she wasn't going all the way down just yet, her tongue was easily long enough to touch and rub the places that her lips haven't reached yet.

And she made sure that I knew it.

I squeezed my eyes shut to try and ignore the feelings and the lewd looks Luna kept giving me. I saw nothing, but with the loss of one sense I almost immediately felt a difference with all other senses heightening as if to punish me. I felt her teeth gently scrape against my mid-shaft, but only once so far as she seemed to correct her technique. From then on, the roughest sensation I could feel from her technique was the gummy ridges on the roof of her mouth gently grinding against my dick's head. I heard slurps and wet kisses as her tongue wrapped around every which way. In the breaks of my own attempts to control myself and my voice, Luna's own moans filled the gaps in the air as she sent pleasant vibrations into me. When she found something that I liked, she used that technique more in her ministrations. Eventually as she pushed herself deeper and deeper, her muzzle reached the base of my cock. I don't think she has a gag reflex. However, it was not without lack of trying that she tried to get more cock in her mouth as she pressed harder into my pelvis. At that moment, I felt the tongue that was previously wrapping itself around my dick now focusing pressing itself under my balls, swapping between caressing the left and right side. A barely noticeable smell permeated the air, and I could almost taste it in the back of my mouth. I couldn't get away or even mitigate the pleasure and lust I was feeling at this very moment as I started to buck my hips again.

"Uhn, Luna..." I let out a strained grunt. I felt her drag her head up until she stopped. I opened my eyes and when I looked down I saw her cupping the head of my dick with her mouth as if holding a lollipop. Her bright blue eyes enraptured me as they met my own.

"MMmmm?" She gave a questioning hum with the vibrations gently massaged me and making it harder and harder to hold back. Though she wasn't bobbing, she was still sucking in the meantime.

"You're too go-AH! I'm...I know I'm close...close to cumming." I could barely get out. I felt myself start a sentence, but every time I tried finishing a thought, Princess Luna seemed to try to do her best to interrupt me by wiggling her tongue, sucking, or playfully teasing me in all the ways she found out were my favorite. I probably sounded pathetic to her right now...

Soon, she let herself off of me with a "pop" as a string of saliva broke between her and my member. Her lips were glistening, but she looked no worse for wear and seemed almost energized.

"Even with the venom, thou seems to be very sensitive." Princess Luna observed looking clearly happy with her handiwork and handling. Her wings bent upward and reached for my face as they gently brushed the side of my cheeks. "We wish we could stop and let thee catch thine breath, but time is of the essence. Grab hold of the sheets, Sir Edgar. This may feel intense..." I did exactly that and she started up her mouth magic again.

She did not change her technique, but she didn't have to. It's like she already knew exactly what I liked. She was perfect and amazing, and she knows that I just needed more "her" to reach my peak. My hands had to be turning white. Not from the moonlight, but from the tightness of my grip. I was gripping the comforter of the mattress with one hand as I kept trying to blindly grab at something else to hold onto with the other. It eventually felt something hard and Luna paused. I felt smooth keratin and saw that I was grabbing Luna's hoof. I let go and started to pull away until I felt Luna push her hoof further into my hand as if to give me permission. I grabbed onto her hoof as she continued to love me with her mouth. If she was a human, the way she pressed into my palms would be like if we were interlocking fingers. She had none to speak of, but the gesture was intimate all the same as she smiled at me.

Despite everything Luna was already doing, everything she had already done, I think it was that one insignificant thing that sent me careening over the edge. "Coming, I'm cumming, i'm-Fuuuuck!" I grunted and growled as I felt a jolt of pleasure course through my body as I shot ropes out my shuddering hips. Perfectly timed, Luna's moaning muzzle went straight to the base of my cock with every pump of semen I released into her mouth, pulling back between shots only to slam back down. As I let myself pulse into Luna's maw as my mind started to go blank, finally releasing after the last few days of being teased and toyed with.

As I started to come back down and sigh with a shudder. When I finally remembered where I was after the roughly ten seconds of bliss, I had a realization. This was the best orgasm of my life. I started to felt like everything has been squeezed out of me after I ran a marathon, and it all came from a dark blue horse...I can't believe I tried telling her "no".

After a few moments, she pulled herself off my cock with another "pop" breaking the silence of my labored breathing. Luna rested her cheek on her hoof, her eyes closed as if she was trying to decide if she liked the strange substance in her mouth, looking almost as if she is using her tongue to play with it within the confines of her lips before tilting her head back and-

*glup*

"Oh my god..." I laid there, staring slack-jawed as she swallowed it all without any complaint, shocking me more than I thought I could have already been. She looked down back back at me, and her eyes glowed in the moonlight with a gentle smile complimenting them.

"Salty...ponies like salt." She admitted as she gently rubbed by sensitive balls and member, slowly leaning in to place gentle pecks upon them both as they shined in her saliva. Luna watched me from behind my dick while I twitched at her contact. Her hoof slowly stroked my shaft in a slow and lazy hoof job as she did her best to ease me down from my high and let me ride it for as long as possible. Before long, it slowed to a stop as she settled with resting both her forelegs on either side of my legs as she laid between them. My head leaned back against the pillows, and I started to close my eyes to bask in the afterglow as I sighed with contentment. There wasn't much else that could be done to make this night any better.

"Luna, that...Ohhhhh that was amazing..." I breathed out as I was slowly coming down from my high. My eyes suddenly shot open once I felt a familiar warmth surrounding the head of my penis. Craning my neck, I lifted my head to look back at the offending culprit and felt a twinge of fear and excitement once I saw Luna's mouth latched onto my oversensitive head, a strong suck causing my hips to jerk in reflex. "UNNG...L-Luna, please. I'm still sensitive." Her smile didn't abate, but her loving eyes shifted to those of impish malice as I saw both her wings stretch from her back and rest her soft feathers on either side of my cock's shaft. "...Luna?" Her flexibility astounded me for a moment but this was all but completely forgotten as she started to rub the soft feathers of her wings against my mid-shaft in an alternating fashion, all the while I felt her swirl her diabolical tongue around my oversensitive head on a deliberate speed never letting up. "Uuuungh fuck Luna! Holy shit, Luna stop! I just came!" I begged in an almost embarrassing whine. My hips were struggling to try and get away from her sadistic onslaught as lightning shot through my nerves, but she was laying in such a way that I could't get my hips away from her. She had my legs held down as she continued to bully my poor member. "-oh god-ffffu-fff!"

Everything that happened next was a blur for me.

I think forgotten how to speak English. I couldn't even swear as I squeezed my eyes shut with as much muscle my face could muster to try and bear this. I tried to reach down blindly with both hands to try push Luna's head off of my genitals, but when I could sense Luna's disapproval with a loud hum, I realized this was a terrible mistake. The moment my fingers brushed against what I think was her wing, she hooked her hooves around my hands and pinned my arms to the bed. Almost completely restrained under her, she nearly doubled her speed and friction against my cock as she loudly and maliciously moaned into it and sent will-shattering vibrations directly into every nerve of her newfound toy. I couldn't even get out a "sorry" or "you win" with any attempts ending up as guttural moans. She did not ease up, and as I was starting to run out of thoughts to describe what I was going through, I came yet again. Too embarrassingly soon as I shot more ropes into her mouth. I am not even sure if she swallowed that time, nor could I care. All my thoughts were full of contradictions, praying that she would both "stop" and "keep going".

There was no limbo, no rest between the heaven and hell she was putting me through...

I do not know how much time has passed, but I know that eventually I woke up a bit more and started to become aware of my surroundings again. I was drenched in sweat and no matter how heavy my breathing was, I just could not get enough oxygen.

"In through my nose, out through my mouth..." I thought to myself. I had plenty of oxygen even if I thought not. I'm just gassed out, is all.

My eyes opened a bit later and I soon realized that I as I was becoming more aware that I was feeling a warm, furry being nestled between my legs.

"Welcome back to the world of the living." A soft voice said from my waist.

I looked down and what I saw was positively depraved.

Princess Luna wore a prideful smile as looked up at me with half-lidded and lustful eyes. Her mane still wasn't floating, but it appeared to have ropes of my cum laying across it. She stared into my eyes as she playfully had my tip in the frog of her hoof, her face resting and nuzzling against the right side of it, heaving breaths of hot air toward it. Her wings were jutted out rigidly, and given that she was just finishing up from giving me the most mind-breaking orgasms of my life, I suspect that the jokes about "Wing Boners" might actually have merit.

"Luna?" I asked in a haze of heat and sensitivity.

"Still us...." Her hoof toyed with my cock, pulling it away from her as far as it could go without it being painful before suddenly letting go and letting my dick comically smack her in the cheek like some lewd paddle. She licked it as her eyes never left mine. "...Enjoy thy rest? We have been waiting for thee to awaken once more."

"W-what happened?" I sputtered dizzily.

"You passed out after we made thee release twice more." She held up a hoof as if she was showing me two imaginary fingers sticking out. "We were starting to get concerned."

"You're joking." I accused, with nothing but a shake of Luna's head against me as her answer. "You're not...Fuuuck, how long was I out?"

Luna appeared to give the answer some thought. "For a while... perhaps an hour or so. We did warn thee of the intensity." I turned my head away from her to take in a breath. That was more than intense. I thought I died for a moment. I'm still struggling to calm down from the heat that coursed through my body. "You made such wonderful faces, and your moans stirred something primal in us. We are sorry, but we couldn't help ourselves. How was it?" Luna implored again as her wings folded inward to gently stroke the side of my shaft as she gently bounced my cock off of her nose and muzzle.

I sighed in comfort at the contact. This was nicer than the last contact I remembered, but I felt sore. I don't think my brain has fully reset after all that. "I don't know yet. Could you like, stop when I ask next time?"

"You didn't like it?" Luna inquired with a tinge of sadness in her voice as she stopped fondling me. I don't know what face I made when she asked, but her smile faded as her ears splayed back behind her head. "No, you didn't...We thought it would exhaust the venom as quickly as possible. "Ripping off the bandages", as some would say, but the venom still made thee too sensitive. We have always enjoyed touching ourselves after we orgasm, but we didn't stop to consider how you were feeling. We are so sorry..." Luna sounded genuinely distraught and ashamed.

"No, it was still awesome, really!" I tried to console. "It was just too much for me right now, and a little scary..." She's not smiling, fuck. "Seriously, don't worry Luna. It was like scary in a good way, you know? Like riding a rollercoaster...I just don't want that rollercoaster to set my nerves on fire or smack my nuts, you know?"

"Do you not like us anymore?" She asked timidly. "Let us make amends. Please, we don't want you to be afraid of us..." Her voice cracked as she leaned her head to rest it against my midsection.

"Amends for what? You were only doing it to save my life, remember? I can't be mad at that. Besides, it was amazing. By far the most intense feeling of my life." I wanted to continue showering her with anything I could to make her feel better, but I was distracted when I started to sniff the air. Something humid and sweet was permeating the air like a perfume or an incense. "Do you smell that Luna? It smells good." I leaned over as best I could to look around the room to see where it could have been coming from.

Luna perked her head up and leaned over to sniff the air herself before turning to look at me. "Perhaps it is thee?"

"No, I probably smell terrible." I tested a sniff of my arm raised before I instantly recoiled. "Oof, yea I need a bath. I'm sorry you were dealing with that."

"You don't smell terrible, Edgar. In truth, we have grown rather fond of your scent in our time with your little friend. It reminds us of incense and the crisp night sky." Luna sighed as if she was recalling an old memory as her eyes closed. "It's comforting."

At least she is not looking sad anymore. Thanks nose! You always know how to guide me to the right outcome.

"I think your sniffer's broken, Luna. That description is a little too poetic for my stank....God, what is that smell." I had to know, and this seemed like a good distraction for her. So I gave Luna as much detail as possible, musing hypocritically as I tried to tell her. "It's like super sweet...and "dark", if that makes sense. It smells downright delicious, like the "sambuca" that you gave me earlier. It's so strong I can almost taste it."

A massive blush of panic appeared on Princess Luna's face she turned and looked toward her flank. "You can smell that?" The ruler of the night blurted out in a low whisper. With a wince she turned back to me with a look of embarrassment as her hind legs rubbed together in agitation. She looked so innocent and vulnerable, a stark contrast to the succubus I saw when I first woke back up. "We shouldn't be surprised. Please do not be disturbed, but it may be us..." Her tail appeared to lift itself, but it was easy to see that a great many strands of her glittering wet tail hair adhered to her backside and traced the elegant contours of her rear and thighs. It was still a bit hard to make out how it looked in the dark, but the glitter in her dark tail hugged against her plot and sparkled in the reflective moonlight, forming a sort of overlay that gave me an idea of the shape of her ass...and by God it was literally Divine.

She flicked her tail to the left and right. As she did, I felt a tsunami of wet heat and this scent washed over me as I covered my mouth and nose. I felt a few droplets of her land on my hand, and that cute look of mortification when she saw what she accidently did. It was almost enough to drive a man mad. "Jesus, Luna, you're soaking wet!"

"We're sorry, Edgar." She groaned in humiliation, burying her head between my thighs. Apparently she was trying to use my legs as ear warmers as she grumbled into the comforter we were both laying on. Her horn was "crossing blades" with my own, but she didn't seem to care. "We couldn't help it. We tried ignoring it, but it just kept dripping."

"Didn't you just get done practically stealing my soul though my dick for the past hour?" I teased with a bit of confusion evident in my voice. "Stop apologizing already. I should be flattered that you were getting so...excited? Is that a good word for it?"

"This is supposed to be for thee and thee alone." Came a whimper muffled by the fabric. "Thou art in danger, but we are allowing ourselves to become too exuberant in our service of you. We shouldn't be getting this aroused. Please don't think less of us..."

...Fuck you nose. You betrayed me and made her sad again!

I was a bit flabbergasted. For my first time, I would have felt safe in saying that Luna definitely knew what she was doing. Her mouth was doing magic earlier, but all of a sudden she was getting flustered over getting turned on by it? I should feel flattered, but I can't help but feel that if Luna was going that long pleasuring me without the same happening to her...It just didn't seem fair, did it? And with that, I got to thinking...

"Hey," I reached down and massaged her ears both hands, feeling her sigh into my thighs as she appeared to have internal monologue of which hand to lean into. "Can I help you out?""

"With what?" Her muffled voice asked.

"Well, you are soaking wet down there, and I'd like to help you out a little." I offered with a bit of a nervous chuckle. "I'd like to try eating you out, if you'd let me." I cringed a moment after I said that. There has to be a sexier way of saying that.

"Thou wishes to what?" She asked as she pulled away from my legs to look up at me with pursed lips.

"I'd like to lick you. You know, give you a blowjob...for mares." Nope, not it. That just sounds hella gay.

"...Thou wishes to taste our nethers? Interesting slang..." She sighed in relief. "Edgar, this is supposed to be for you."

"Hey, you're way more worked up than I am right now, and it ain't fair if I'm the only one getting some, right?" I argue with her. "You told me yourself that you would rather risk your own safety than some other pony when servicing such a "powerful and dangerous being." Luna was nodding along, almost as if it was both me and her nethers trying to convince her to agree with me. "I think you deserve something for that, right?"

On the right track...

Luna looked close to saying yes before suddenly shaking her head. "We can handle it ourselves at a later time. We don't want to insist."

I should really apologize for being so resistant to her, now that the shoes on the other foot.

I started to get up from my spot and scooted to the side. With the bed seemingly being Alicorn-sized, there was plenty of room for me to do so. It's about time I pulled out my secret weapon. "You want to make it up to me and make amends? Well then let me make it up to you and give you some payback. Lay down..."

"Payback". That's the phrase. Good job, Brain. Don't disappoint me like my nose did.

Luna gazed at me in silence before a small smile started to win her over. "We suppose we have no choice if it is to make things right..." Luna appeared to rationalize with a growing excitement and started to crawl up to the spot I was laying down on before turning and laying on her back with her wings spread out. Her legs soon joined her wings in spreading as a wet tail swished to the side to give me a better view of the dark lips of her pussy, as well as two small mounds resting little ways between her hind legs.

"I'm a genius..." I thought to myself as I started to crawl downward to the source of the sweet pheromone permeating the air. As I stood face to lips with Luna's lips, I realized that this was really happening. "...Oh no, I've never eaten pussy before. I know I asked if I could help, but its so much more intimidating up clo-IT JUST WINKED AT ME! It's making lewd noises!"

"Edgar, don't make us wait. Thou has us quivering with anticipation." Luna's purred with need. "Please...help us make amends, my hero..."

Alright, no bowing out now. I'm not gonna Blue Ball...Blue clam? Blue Bean? I'm not gonna Blue Bean Luna. I won't be able to live it down. Not after she asked so nicely.

"...You're not a human Luna, so I want you to tell me if I can be doing better, okay?" Princess Luna slowly nodded with prospect in her half-lidded gaze before closing her eyes and laying back onto the pillow, entrusting me with her pleasure.

Alrighty, showtime. I might be out of my league with this, but I did read a few tips online for research purposes back in my teen years. I guess maybe I should start on the outside and work my way in. Upon a better look at it, it was tall(if that was a good way to describe it). Honestly looked like some of the art that I sa-heard it described about online.

It gave the occasional wink, and it seemed to glisten in Luna's juices. Even the musk was starting to make me light-headed, and it spurred me onward to take the plunge. As my tongue took the first decisive lick causing the breath Luna appeared to be holding to hitch, I was very pleasantly surprised. I gave a few experimental licks around the outside in case I was going crazy, but no. I just tasted something I could describe as sweet and "slightly tangy", but it was like licorice, or that sambuca Luna gave me earlier. I can get used to this...

I kept licking and trying to see if there was more flavors hidden behind those lips. With every lick, my tongue was rewarded with more flavorful and sticky substances as I felt more and more of her. Every so often, I heard sighs on contentment as Luna's hips rolled themselves into my face. I started to feel more confident, and after I licked the outside of her pussy for a while, I tried inserting my tongue inside her and I thought I was going to faint at how warm and tight it was inside. Even pressing my tongue inside was met with some resistance by Luna's walls, which immediately began to clench around my tongue to give it a full and tight squeeze. Feeling that on my tongue...Just the thought of how that would feel if ... I felt myself starting to get hard again at the feeling as I felt my cock brush against the bed. The friction against the bed caused me to start humping the sheets a little bit, and as I tried to calm myself down, I was met with Luna's moaning as she started to writhe a bit as well. "Mmmm, stop teasing Edgar... You've made your point..."

Oh No... I was actually trying my best! Am I bad at this!?!?

My tongue, my lips, my chin, my nose. I used it all to try and stimulate her. Kissing and making out with her pussy, rubbing my nose and chin everywhere I could. Even shoving my tongue as deep as I could, it was still not enough for her. I started to freak out as I frantically did as much as I could to her poor neglected genitals. Luna started moaning and mewling a bit more often, but it wasn't enough for me. I had to think quickly to make this better for her before she got bored and disappointed with me.

Suddenly, it hit me. While eating her out, I started to rub my fingers while licking them and her marehood. Once lubricated, I switched tactics and I started to slowly insert my middle finger into her depths. "MmmmMm, that's moroOHHH!-" Luna tensed up as my digit went deeper and deeper, and I felt her right leg start to shake. Funny, my tongue was clearly too short for her, but add a finger and now it is juuust right for her. "K-keep going, Edgar. Uuhh-Up. A little moooore..." With an apparent understanding between us, I followed Luna's guidance toward what I assumed was her g-spot. I didn't find a magical button that could make her orgasm instantly, but I got lucky. I felt barely a bump against my finger, and as if that was the trigger, she started to convulse as if she was going into an epileptic fit. Her velvety walls tightened erratically around my finger and it took a small but noticeable effort to pull it out and thrust it into her. Even her hips bucked against my mouth as a low moan escaped from deep within her throat.

I started to feel a pressure on my head as Luna's haunches started to close themselves around my head. They felt warm and slick since her fur was matted with her juices from earlier. "Edgar...our pearl. We are so close!" I felt a pair of hooves gently tug at my hair, and I let her pull me up slowly. I followed her guidance with my tongue trailing up her folds. I felt something poke out as her pussy winked at me, basically kissing my own lips. I heard a gasp as I kissed back against the peculiar nub that just barely poked out. "THERE! Right there~"

I was appreciative of Luna doing her best to help me please her, and smiled as I took other hand and used my fingers to try open her folds back gently to get direct access to it, revealing a small bump. The effects were immediate, as every lick I performed around there had Luna's hips jerk into my face with more and more force. Holy shit...I found the clitoris, I think? I tried licking and sucking on her clit every time it poked out during her winks, alternating between gentle licks and firm pressure with the flat of my tongue. It only took a few more seconds before she shattered, the orgasm ripping through her body like an electric shock with her thighs squeezing tightly around my head. The sensation was incredible and my mind went blank at the sheer strength of it as her hips bucked into my face with more force, rubbing her wet lips and my nose against her clitoris. "MMMMMMMGNNNNNNNNN!" The tremors as her orgasm arrived as she gave a guttural scream with her lips and eyes sealed shut, creating a loud and erotic hum. I tasted more of her in that time as my chin felt noticeably more moisturized, and I realized that I just made Princess Luna cum. She lost control of her body as she hugged my head between her legs and against her heat as her right leg twitched, and it was all because of me... She was riding it out for a short time afterward, with sudden jerks and spasms sporadically popping up as I slowly lapping at her folds as her legs released their hold on my head. It still hurt a little, but I ignored it as I had other things on my mind at the moment.

I didn't think I was doing that good at it, but I think this was my favorite part of tonight. Don't get me wrong, getting my dick sucked into oblivion and getting the most powerful orgasm of my life was fantastic...but there was something about making her cum. Making her feel that good... If the tables were reversed and she was the one that was bitten, I could easily see myself giving Luna the same treatment for as long as she needed. I felt a deeper understanding of her point of view. Her needs. I was content to continue pressing my tongue flat against her folds as I tasted her essence, moaning into her just as she had done to me... I didn't like my moans, but she seemed to, so that was good enough reason for me to not have a care in the world as I treated her like royalty.

But then she decided to speak.

"P-please slow down, Edgar." She huffed breathlessly. "We're very sensitive right now..."

...

All the pride I accumulated for making her cum was transmuted into malicious cruelty as I had another idea pop up in my head. A wonderful, awful idea. A devilish smile made its way to my face as I clamped her legs over my shoulders and held them tight. "Edgar?" I took one more look at the nub that she lead me to before suddenly suckling gently suckling on it. "MNnnngn Edg-AH! WHY-Eee!!!"

I didn't say a word, but I did look up at the struggling princess to let my eyes speak for me. "Well well well...if it isn't the consequences of your own actions." I thought to her as I dove my tongue deep inside her once more to explore a bit more. I read about this once while doing "research" and thought it would be a good idea to try out actually spelling out words with my tongue. In my time looking into this, people recommended all sorts of things...the Alphabet, compliments, your partner's name... I was not feeling that romantic. "Let me spell it out for you..."

"P-A-Y"

As my tongue danced around her labia, her moans turned into protests as she squirmed beneath me with her body doing its best to try and get away from me. "Thou hast payback! We beg of thee stop! CEASE! DESIST!" She was failing miserably with her escape though as I had her legs locked against my shoulders. She clearly knew what I was doing but there was a hint of desperation in her voice that told me she wasn't entirely opposed to it. Even her tail seemed to work against her as it started to drape itself over the back of my neck and pushing the back of my head deeper. Besides, I wasn't finished yet.

"B-A-C-K"

I continued to explore every inch of her pussy with my tongue, trailing from her swollen clit down to the opening of her sex and back up again. Her wetness coated my tongue as I delved deeper into her folds. Moans mixed with soft cries as the pleasure built within her once again.

"I-S..."

"N-NO! Not agai-AHmmmm. SSsss-uhnnng . Stu-stuh-STOOoooOP~!" Even with her stuttering, I might have started listening if it wasn't for that dopey smile she had on her face as she leaned back into the pillows of the bed and arched her back, giving me an easier time accessing her.

I kept giving her the riot act with my tongue. I could feel how turned on she was, her juices dripping onto my tongue as I continued to devour her. The musky licorice scent of her arousal filled the air, making me even more eager to please her in my revenge.

"A ....B-I-T-C-H"

Her moans turned into high-pitched whimpers as she approached the edge once again. Her muscles tensed beneath my touch, and I knew she was close to coming undone once more. Her back arched off the bed as she cried out in pleasure, her juices flowing freely into my waiting mouth. Revenge never tasted so sweet.

I continued to lap at her pussy throughout her climax again, drawing out every last drop of ecstasy from her body. She writhed beneath me, lost in a sea of pleasure that I had created for her.

"StopStopStopStopStopStopStopStopStop" She begged and whined as she rode out her orgasm, but I felt that she might have been enjoying this as much as I was getting back at her. Her tail was wrapped around my neck, and she was pulling me closer to her with each passing moment.

Eventually, I did stop and released her from my grip to let her catch her breath. She was panting heavily, her chest heaving with each labored breath. Her eyes were glazed over with lust, and her body was trembling with desire. I think I am starting to understand what Luna was getting out of that previous torture she put me through. Watching her tremble was hot, to say the least. I crawled up her body, planting kisses and rubbing along her soft fur as I went. No sounds came from Luna aside from the whimpering and small whinnies that were coming from her as she arched her body into my touch. Her body still had some leftover tremors from her last orgasm, but when I got up to face her, she didn't even look at me. She just kept staring at the ceiling behind me like she was in an orgasmic coma.

"Luna?" I asked, starting to think I had gone to far. She looked broken. I climbed up over her and looked at the blank look she was giving. I stroked the side of her cheeks with my hand to try and get her attention. "Luna, are you okay?"

As if waking up or suddenly noticing I was there, her silence was broken by a deep low voice as Luna eyes locked with mine and narrowed.

"...Why did you stop?"

I was dumbfounded by the mixed signals. "Cause you were telling me to. I didn't want to go too far, but you said earlier that you liked to touch yourself after cumming. I thought I overdid it, and I didn't want to hurt you an-" Luna reached behind the back of my head with her forehooves, stunning me as she pulled me into her and pressed her lips into mine, turning my ramblings into moans.

This wasn't my first kiss but Luna certainly took the time to make it feel like it was as she slowly worked herself on my lips with her own. The warmth and pressure of her lips felt almost indistinguishable from that of a human's as she gently nibbled and licked at my lips, before slowly moving outside the corner of my lips and licking my cheeks as if to clean off any of her essence that lingered.

"Holy fuck, how are you so good..." I thought to myself. I felt a deep red blush spread across my cheeks as her lips slid down my face to my neck where she started to kiss, lick, and bite at the crook of my neck. I tried to do the same for her, but couldn't concentrate as she switched her technique on me, alternating between nipping at my neck with her teeth and leaving long licks. My entire body felt like a giant erogenous zone as I moaned yet again, causing Luna to break her neck-sucking to give me a post-orgasmic giggle that oozed with lust before her eyes became half-lidded once more.

"Edgar, you should have more confidence in yourself. If I really wanted you to stop..." Luna's foreleg's flipped me over onto my back as she rolled with me, finding herself straddling on top of me. Face to muzzle, her warm breath washed over me. "We could have put up more of a struggle." She gingerly rested herself on top of me as she hugged her body close to mine. "We hope we are not too heavy. We are larger and taller than many, apart from our niece and some well-fed Earth ponies."

That was an absurd statement. She had enough heft to her to know that an Alicorn laying on top of me, but she wasn't as heavy as I thought she would be even with her being a fair bit larger than me. Unlike when Telsona was on top of me, I could breath easily even with how close she was. Unlike the plastically hardened shell that Telsona had when she rested on me, Luna felt warm and soft. Huggable and cuddlable. Her dark blue pelt was like a fine felt over my naked body, and I felt her soft coat brush across my stomach, my chest, my hips...my crotch. Every breath she took caused her body to rise and lower, brushing her fur against my skin. That alone was stimulating me in ways I was not used to, but the intimacy of this position was setting my heart pounding. My breath hitched as my cock, already hard again from both Luna's kissing and her moans from earlier, suddenly twitched and lightly slapped against Luna's rear. She jumped at the contact but soon realized what happened as a smirk started to creep up on the side of her face.

"Oh, we have a visitor..." She sultrily teased.

"Friend of yours?" I asked.

Damn I'm smooth. Master of Romance.

"Yes. It's been far too long, and we simply must catch up..." She gave her hips a wiggle which forced a sigh of contentment from me as my cock wedged itself between her cheeks. "A Queen's venom must truly be potent, if thou art willing and able even now. One more time Edgar? To be sure...?"

"I can do that..." I whispered to her.

Luna smiled warmly at my admission as she sat up, taking a moment to grind her pelvis against mine. I started to sit up before feeling Luna pushing my shoulders back down onto the bed behind me. "Ah ah ah~, Edgar. We made an exception for thee earlier, but this night is still for thee and thee alone."

"Has anyone ever told you that you are very assertive?" I asked.

"We should hope so. We are a Princess of Equestria." Luna retorted with some air of pride. She seemed to take it as a compliment as she gifted me a cocky look that almost seemed to promise that I was going to enjoy what happened next.

"Still, I don't want to feel like a dead fish." I grumbled.

"You won't. We promise." Luna cooed as she leaned over me and planted a soft peck on my lips. "We do have but one small request of you. When thou art nearing completion again, do not try to stop us as you have done when we were suckling upon thee. We are trying to get the venom out of your system, and thou must let yourself enjoy this for that to happen. We decree that the only time thou art allowed to stop us is to instruct us on how to better please you. Otherwise," Luna leaned her head to the side of mine and whispered with a sultry breath "~Let go of your inhibitions. I weaved this night just for you, and I want to hear what lies in your dreams~..." I felt her grind herself onto me as if it was a slow and sensual tango, causing a relaxed sigh as I hugged her against me almost reflexively.

"Mmmm, there's a good colt..." Luna sighed into my ear. I don't think she meant to make it sound as erotic as she did, but that deep, throaty purr caused goosebumps to rise on my body as I felt the vibrations run down my neck and across my chest. I couldn't get enough of that. The sound of Luna purring while slowly grinding her hindquarters against me was music to my ears. My hands found their way onto her back and began to trace her body, exploring her fur with my fingertips in the dim light. She didn't say anything to protest, and her ears were relaxed as I tried to map her body out. Her hips rocked gently as her body rocked against mine with a lazy, relaxed rhythm.

How could I ever hope to refuse her? Why did I argue so much against her in the first place?

"How can I say no to you?" I asked, starting to get more playful with her. I let my hands wander around her barrel as I felt myself thrust up against her. Her pleasured sighs started to join mine. "You really do have a beautiful body." My hands rubbed around her pelt as I felt up and down her figure. She seemed to like it and let out a delighted sigh, making it harder for me to keep my composure as I started to grow more and more excited.

"Oh?" She asked bemusedly as she leaned forward once more and started to nibble near my neck once more. She took the same treatment to my neck as before, alternating between long licks, light kisses, and even taking the time to occasionally suckle at my neck, causing me to whimper in pleasure and surprise.

"Mmm, your fur is amazing. The moonlight almost makes you glow-OH f-..." I could barely think as she immediately swapped from by neck to nibble and pull at my earlobe and interrupting my train of thought as I tried complimenting Luna. Whatever control I thought I had over how this went, it was clear that it was only the amount that Luna let me have. How much time did it take her to get so good with her mouth? "You have a nice voice...and a cute laugh...you have beautiful wings..." I probably should have stopped by now, but I didn't get the memo. Every single compliment came out of my mouth without any consideration for how good I would sound as my mouth continued to blurt out praise in the midst of the lewd wet noises she was making. "You have beautiful eyes...your mane looks soft...even with the cum hanging off of it..."Luna's ministrations had stopped and she listened to my ramblings with an air of disbelief. She lifted her head and looked me dead in the eyes. "T-That not to say that it isn't hot or anything. It would just look better witho-" Luna's hoof found its way over my mouth again.

"Do you remember what we said earlier in the night? About your penchant for "kind words" and "ruining the moment"?" Luna asked, trying to hold back her laughter.

"Sorry..." I mumbled bashfully. The blush I felt on my face was less of being a turned on and more of embarrassment as she rightly called me out for what I was trying to do.

Luna hummed as she let herself calm down. "Careful now. Too much flattery, and one might think you are trying to bed a princess...Perhaps they were right..."Luna sultrily joked.

I chuckled, but that chuckle was cut off when I felt Luna slid herself further up my body until my tip was just barely kissing her entrance. Both our genitals were coated in her fluids from the previous "dry humping" we did, if I could even call it that, and I could feel her heat against my shaft as I felt a small wet spot start to grow on my pelvis.

My heart started to pound again. I took a deep breath I shut my eyes I waited for the inevitable plunge into her but felt nothing. Opening my eyes, I saw that she stopped just before I entered her, and tilted my head up to meet once more with Luna's eyes. The Alicorn's eyes still radiated wanton lust, but as her gaze bore into me, I saw concern start to manifest.

"Edgar, are you nervous even now?" She asked. Her wings tips stretched forward to caress my face as if to steady my own face to face hers. Her eyes didn't leave mine as she gently rested her chest on mine and started to lightly hug me, and her legs rested themselves on either side of mine, giving me a sensation of being trapped, but not in a bad way.

I thought about my answer, before shaking my head. "A little, but not as much as I was."

"This may be your first time with a pony, but we promise it will be just as good, if not better than with one of your human mares."

That got me to pause. I should probably come clean with her. I flew by the seat of my pants in eating her out, but I should probably set some expectations. As she started to relax her legs and slide herself back to drop once more, I stopped her..

"...I'm gonna be honest, this is my first time...with anybody. I know that you're trying to get the venom out of my system, but if the fun ends early, promise you won't hold it against me?"

This time, it was Luna's turn to pause her descent. "You're a virgin..." That was more of a statement than a question.

"Yes..." I replied. I don't think I should have been nervous about admitting that. I am a virgin, but I like to think I'm mature enough to not let it bother me. Most guys got laid sometime in between their sophomore and senior years, and I guess I was a late bloomer. Never really had the time for it with the rehearsals for plays, aikido classes, and babysitting my sisters. "Not having enough time" was the reason my first girlfriend broke up with me to begin with. The White Bitch of Starbucks, as I nicknamed her. That relationship didn't really last long, so I could hardly even care about the break-up when it finally happened. Now that I'm actually about to lose it, I can't stop thinking about it. Why was I so nervous about it now? Cause it was with Luna? What if it isn't all it was cracked up to be...?

"We had suspected..." Luna's neutral gaze was held once more for a few moments before she sighed and smiled at me. "...There is no shame in that. None at all." She comforted, brushing one of her hooves across my chest. "We could stop now if you would like, but we will not rest easy without knowing for certain that the venom's effects have been fully exhausted." She leaned in closer, her face inches from mine. "Please, Noble Edgar...Let us bestow a perfect end to this night..." I gulped. I am not sure how many times I have done so since she was with me. She seemed to pick up on my hesitation. She waited for my answer, but I was afraid to give it. "...Would you prefer that we stop?"

No...with how much Luna had taken care of me... With how much Luna has been working to make this night perfect despite the circumstances, I can't tell her "no" now. Not when I already committed. I'm gonna make this good for her. I will make her feel good one more time.

"No. Let's do it." I breathed out, barely unable to contain my nervous excitement...my nervicitement.

Luna's accepted my approval with a relieved smile as she grinded her body against mine once more, eliciting a shuddering sigh. My cock brushed against the lips of her entrance before she slid back and finally let me push into her.

The tightness and warmth was absolutely blissful as my shaft was enveloped in her velvet insides, causing my head to tilt back as I felt myself be enveloped by the hot embrace of her inner walls. The way it squeezed against my length sent tingles up my spine. Down...Down...Down, she kept sliding until the entire length of my penis hilted inside her in one go. She paused for a second, looking down at me with a contented smile as her lips parted slightly, as if she was just barely holding back a moan. She felt so tight and so warm that I never wanted to leave this moment. I didn't know if this was how a human pussy would feel like, but it was better than any dream I could ever hope for.

"Still nervous?" Luna asked, almost teasingly.

"Not so much now." I replied.

"Good...Thou shouldn't be." Luna purred as she slowly pulled her body up my cock. It felt as if it was being sucked into her with every inch she pulled up, until the tip was nearly out before suddenly plunging back down on me. The tightness of her walls contracted around me as she continued her slow ride, and they way she would hilt and grind herself into me was quickly making me lose my mind. "You feel bigger than you appeared."

I chuckled. "Thanks..." It wasn't long after when Luna started to pick up the pace. Each time she moved had me losing myself more and more as I heard her gasp and sigh in pleasure. "L-Luna... You're really tight..." I groaned through gritted teeth. I felt a familiar pressure building up in my pelvis as she continued to move up and down at a steady pace.

"...No, No, already??? It hasn't even been a minute and I'm already gonna cum? No, that's not fair! I just started!!!" I thought to myself, tensing every single muscle in my body to try and avoid the disappointment Luna was going to feel.

"Art thou about to cum already?" Luna asked with a shit-eating grin. I knew that she wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible, but I don't want this to end so quickly...but I can't help it. I've gotten too worked up.

I nodded to her, getting ready for my release. Luna caught me off guard, however, as she suddenly stopped her movements and just placed a hoof on my diaphragm. "Don't breathe from your chest...breathe from here...slowly, and tense these muscles." She cooed in a sultry voice. I was confused for a moment but I tried my best to follow her orders. "Now relax..." My cock was still throbbing inside of her, but after a few moments I slowly felt the pressure in my pelvis start to relax. I wasn't on the verge anymore. I felt a strange mix of disappointment and relief that I didn't cum.

"Thank you, Luna. That was close."

Luna simply nodded and sat there for a bit...and just sat there...not doing anything.

"Are you gonna move?" I asked as delicately as possible. I can't exactly tell her get to it, but the wait was driving me crazy.

"No..."

"...Should I start moving?" I asked.

"No...we will wait a bit longer."

"Why? I thought the point was to force me to cum asap?" I asked, confused at Luna's sudden shift in opinion. She stayed still motionless. "You even told me to tell you how to "please me", didn't you?"

"We did...but thou art gifting us thine first. This changes things." The Princess started to slowly roll her hips in small circles, her walls undulating around me in a way that I didn't even think was possible and eliciting a sigh from me. "This needs to be special." She leaned in and rested her lips right next to my ear. "This needs to be savored." I felt the hairs on my body rise as I shivered at her whisper. I felt goosebumps start to appear on my arms in anticipation. "We will take it a bit slower for now..." She smirked. I swear, this was a smirk that didn't even have the common decency of being evil. It was just pure smug satisfaction. I don't think she even realized how proud she looked at what her body was doing to me with nigh any effort. "We promise, this will be worth thy wait when you cum buckets..." Luna pulled herself up before sitting back down once more. My breath hitched and I started to feel the pleasure once more as she rolled her hips and gyrated her pelvis against mine. It was faster than before, but not as fast as she was doing it at the start.

"Unnng... You feel so good...its so tight..." I couldn't help but mumble out loud. Wispy moans escaped her as she continued to slowly bounce on my cock, rolling her hips with every descent before grinding against me and lifting herself once more. My hands gripped onto her fur for some sort of stability as I felt her silky coat rub against my skin and slide across my torso.

"So we've heard..." Luna teased between her hums. "We are-mmmhmnn-not fairing much better. Thou art as hard as steel. We hope you are enjoying this as much as we are...Keep breathing like we asked." Luna did her due diligence in policing me, but was having a hard time keeping herself under control as well if her mumbling and whimpering was anything to go by. She ground her sex into mine and her vaginal muscles squeezed in erratic patterns. "We can feel your spire's heat...You throbbing against our insides. Can you feel us squeezing you? Can you fmmm-feel how wet we are?" Luna leaned forward, her breath heavy as her chest heaving with each breath. "Can you feel what you are doing to us?"

"Fuck...Luna...I-" I couldn't keep up with her lewd dirty-talk. It was just too erotic for me to focus on that when I was trying to ignore what she was doing to me . I could imagine her practicing her motions on a pillow, trying her best to keep it right as how she practiced. However, the dance she was attempting to do on my lap kept getting interrupted by her own shudders and spasms as she hits what I think is her g-spot. She was powering through it though, and through hitches of her breath and moans, she seemed to be feeling really good. I thought she was hamming it up just for me at first, but as I listened, I feel they were real. Some of her moans sounded like they were the stuff out of some x-rated vids, others were almost sounded like they could have been downright embarrassing for her, which I found to be even hotter than the other ones.

As my hands kept exploring her body, Luna decided to take an even more dominate position by hooking a hand with a hoof and pinning one arm above my head as she leaned in. Though she was slightly taller than me in this position, I was still able to look her face to face, she demonstrated this to me by mashing her lips into my mine to stifle her downright-feral moans. Her tongue ran across my lips as she moaned, tickling and prodding the corners to try and find an entrance. Involuntarily, I flinched at this contact and one particularly tight squeeze of her pussy, and this was all it took for her to seize the opportunity to plunge her tongue into my mouth, to explore everything she felt with my tongue included in my first real French kiss.

...Licorice...

I read stories with sex scenes before, and some of them describe "kissing" as a boxing match or a battle between the two appendages. This was not a battle. This was a massacre.

Princess Luna easily out-maneuvered and beat her long tongue against mine every which-step of the way. When I tried to hide in one side of my mouth, she found where it was hiding and battered it with her own, dancing around it in circles and trying attempting to pull it into her mouth with what little friction she had on her tongue. I was getting mixed signals as when I tried to push my tongue into her mouth, she pushed it back out and continued to bully it. She wrestled and explored every inch of my mouth. She already won the fight, and I was already beaten in this one-sided tongue-war she was waging against me, but she was determined to leave no survivors as I moaned pitifully in her mouth. I never knew that a kiss was supposed to feel this good.

When she pulled away with as string of saliva dripping from her mouth down onto my chin, I was suddenly made aware as to how I wasn't breathing the entire time during that kiss. It couldn't have been long since I was still alive, albeit barely. However, it felt like eternity was passing by in that instant, and I was once more hoping...praying that she would start the kiss again. To get that sweet, warm taste of her lips once more.

My free hand, which was still caressing Luna's back, was torn away though my sheer force of will as I give it a new target. I reached out to caress the side of Luna's head, combing her hair with my fingers. "Hhh... Nhhh...Hngg...MMmmn" Luna mewled out as she continued her bouncing on my cock, and the sight of her face as she was locked in this bliss was only fueling the fire inside me. Luna leaned and nuzzled into my palm as she moaned, removing the hoof that held my other hand down and bringing it to her mouth, biting it as she tried stifling her moans. She was still propped up by one hoof anchored off to my right shoulder. Now free from her sensual restraint, my other hand went straight for the side of her ass, squeezing and kneading it.

I could feel her muscles, how much hard work she must have put into it, yet there was a soft marshmellow-y layer of thin fat covering it as well, giving it the well-structured shape that I noticed from before. It was an amazing ass, and it was almost too easy to tell she was loving the extra attention my hands were giving her. "MMm...mMm-ark. My Mark! A little closer..." At her request, my hands drifted to the side of her flank and as it brushed where her Cutie mark was I saw Luna's eyes shoot open. She tensed up before letting out a throaty moan as an instant shock of pleasure hit her like a bolt of lightning. "Again. Mmhhm...Again. Keep rubbing!" I quickly obliged, moving my hands around and massaging the side of her flank once more, eliciting a gasp from her before she bit her lip. "N-NnnnHhh~ we're s-so close." I could never imagine something this erotic even in my wettest dreams, but I was in disbelief at how much Luna was enjoying it. "Oh, Edgar..." She moaned while breathing heavily, still trying to catch her breath from her prior session of French kissing me. She leaned forward once more to start kissing me, but I stopped her with a hand under her chin, barely holding onto my own sanity. She looked hurt that I would stop her right in the middle of this moment. She stopped bouncing, instead resting her hips on mine. "Edgar?"

I felt myself start to get close, and I know that I was not going to hold on for much longer. Just like Luna wanted me to before, I stopped and started to get another breather. I have no idea for how long she was going at it, but it was nearing its climax. "Luna...I'm getting close. I think I should-" She interrupted me this time, forcing her lips onto mine once more with renewed vigor. As she kissed me, I felt her talk into my mouth during the kiss. It was hard to make out, but it sounded like she was calling me stupid in between her hums and moans. This time, instead of hesitating like before, I embraced my losing battle once more as she resumed her thrusts.

Luna pulled away all too soon, letting strands of our saliva fall back on my chin."Oh Faust Edgar, if you don't cum soon, you'll drive us MAD!" She announced while diving back in for more.

I started to thrust up into her, trying to match her rhythm.

"That's it Edgar, that's the way. Yes Edgar...YES! Let yourself go. Don't hold back!" Princess Luna was borderline yelling at me, losing herself to the sensations as she commanded me to cum. "We can't be safe unless we are sure. Give us every single drop of your seed! Edgar!" She yelled out one last time before forcing her muzzle against my face again as she did her best to have her way with me, though I put up the best fight I can during our make-out session as we panted into each others mouths. I wasn't going to let myself get beaten this time, and Luna sounds very close herself.

It was supposed to be a cliché, saying one's name like that during sex...but I couldn't blame her. Had I not been kissing her at that moment, I would be moaning her name too. It was all...just...PERFECT....

The Motions of her erotic dance...The Gyrations...The Squeezing...Her tender kiss...Her beautiful expressions...Her erotic moans...The musky scent of our bodies of permeating the room...

The love...the love in her eyes as I caught her peaking at mine though the kisses.

The frantic gyrations as she started to speed up her milking...Her sex getting impossibly tight...The vibrations I felt on my lips as she groaned loudly into my mouth... The sex-crazed eyes of a woman who is on the brink of mind-numbing ecstasy... The pleading look she was giving me...begging me to cum right now!

Luna broke the kiss one last time.

"Cum...Cum...CUM! CUM FOR ME EDGAR!" Luna manifested her thoughts in to reality, and there wasn't a damn thing I can do to stop the rush of my ejaculation flowing into her. I pulsed into her for longer that I thought should be possible even after how much I ejaculated tonight, and every single pulse felt like a weight off my shoulders and soul. I hugged her tight as against me as I kept flexing my glutes, doing my best to drive myself as deep into her as possible. I could feel every inch of my shaft being squeezed and milked as her velvet walls tightened around me almost painfully so.

Luna's voice came out in a high pitched gasp as she felt the torrent of my seed flood into her depths, and I could feel my warm fluids seeping into her. Her sex twitched and spasmed around my cock as she was brought to the same orgasm she gave me moments earlier. Her lips quivered and trembled, and her eyes shut tightly as pressed herself against me and hugged me back tighter than I was hugging her. She was biting my shoulder hard enough that it felt like she was trying to draw blood, and oddly enough the stinging sensation only added to the pleasure coursing through me as our hips rocked together.

I lied about the blowjob. THIS was the most intense orgasm I ever had, and my eyes rolled up as the sensations became too much for me to handle. I shut my eyes and continued to ride out the feeling until I started to grow tired. I relaxed into the bed as I started to feel myself grow limp, but Luna kept grinding into me as she humped herself through an orgasm that was wracking through her.

I was already starting to go soft, but she kept riding me and grinding into me. My mind started to go blank once more, yet I didn't even try and stop Princess Luna this time. If only from her words earlier about touching herself after an orgasm. This was what made her happy, apparently. As such, I was prepared to just grin and bare it for now, sucking in air through my teeth since I was too tired to try and stop her. Yet all throughout the waves and electricity flowing through my nerves, it felt like Luna was restraining herself...to make it easier and more pleasant for me. For the both of us.

Eventually, her own throes died down and she finally stopped her motions. Her teeth unlatched from my shoulder and she just collapsed on top of me. Taking in deep breaths as she laid against me, she straddled me with her legs and wrapped her wings in a cocoon around me. I heard every mewling breath she took as even her cheek was resting against mine. She was so soft...

We stayed like that just basking in the moment, but after a time Luna broke the silence.

"Edgar...we...wel..." Luna tried to speak, but she couldn't form words as she tried catching her breath. She seemed so utterly spent that she couldn't even move an inch. "...Was your first time everything...you hoped it to be?" I tiredly chuckled at her words as I slowly took hold of her body, hugging her against my chest as I felt her breathing start to even out, and match with mine. Through my stupor, I tried to lift Luna's bottom to pull my dick out only to feel her press further into me. "MmmNo, leave it...please. You're so warm now."

I didn't bother arguing. "Okay..." I mumbled. I felt so tired, but I didn't feel scared anymore...not while she was here. Not when she's done so much to protect me... "I...Luna, tha-" I tried talking to her. Telling her exactly what I felt.

What I was feeling right then...

What she made me feel...

...But all I can think about was how woozy and tired I am. My eyes started to feel heavy, fluttering in their attempts to close. I didn't want to sleep...not yet. "Luna...I think I-" I tried to talk, but she interrupted me as she slowly nuzzled into my neck.

"Shhh, you're safe now. Safe from her...Sleep...Dream...shhhhh" Luna cooed into my ears as she hugged me close to her. I wanted to argue, to finish what I was trying to tell her. What I needed to tell her, but her requests... they sounded so nice right now. "Dream of something sweet. Dream of us if thou wishes, but above all, dream of what makes thee happy..." Then I heard it again. That humming of hers. The nameless lullaby she was humming when I first woke up.

That was the last thing I heard before I drifted into a warm slumber...

Author's Note

Things are moving a bit fast for Edgar, aren't they? Well you're right...

As for the general feel, how was it for the people who read it all the way through? First time writing a "sex scene", so I wanted to see what everyone thought. Too much? Need an extra 20K words? Was it too noticeable?

As per the usual, I haven't edited this as well as I should have yet. It's 4AM at the time of typing this and I am tired of staring at this.

I'll read it again soon to proof-read it, but if you notice anything obvious and obnoxious, please let me know and I'll do my best to fix it.

I live for comments and validation, so I wanted to see what I need to change or what works best while I write this.

If you didn't like it, I wrote an alternate ending below:

Alternate ending to the chapter:

"Shhhhhh...Shhhhhh." I finally started to register a woman's voice gently hush from my right. I felt humidity, hot and fresh with the smell of something warm and sweet washing over my face. What is that? Black Licorice?. Before long, I heard the humming start once more. The lullaby was a slow, rhythmic melody, each note floating in the air with a tune that ebbed and flowed like the gentle tide of the sea. The light of moonlight and the calm of night. It felt like the gravity of the moon was gently pulling me, carrying with it a sense of peace and serenity.

"That voice..." I blurted out in my haze.

The humming stopped suddenly as the woman's voice broke the wordless song with a heavy breath. "You are finally awake..."

"...You were trying to cross the border, right?"

Todd, you've done it again.

Chapter Eleven: What lies beneath the lies - 1/2
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Eleven: What lies beneath the lies - 1/2

Author's note
Some NSFW stuff, but nothing explicitly sexual going on. More so medical, I guess?

Both of these chapters will take place before the events of Chapter Ten: ...and the Embrace of the Moon and Celestia's "talk" with Edgar.(You know the one)

“Caring too much could be dangerous; I saw that now. But the alternative was no better.”
-Ann Aguirre.

***Trixie's POV***
**Twilight's castle**
*Before sunset, a short time after Edgar fainted in the hallway...before Luna's treatment*

I galloped frantically through the castle's corridors with as my hoofbeats were echoing off the walls. Princess Luna flew off with Edgar shortly after he collapsed and took him somewhere in the castle. I skipped a few floors since since they were below us by a few windows, but no matter which door I tried to enter or peak through I could not find any sign of either Princess Luna or Edgar. It's like they both vanished into thin air after I lost sight of them, but the urgency to find them drove me forward. To not give up on them.

"Trixie!"

I had to find him.

"Trixie, wait up!"

I need to know that he is safe.

Just then, I felt myself suddenly get slower and more sluggish, like I was dragging my wagon through quicksand.

"TRIXIE!" I heard Twilight yell at me. Not a second later, I saw a purple glow come out from my peripheral vision and surround me, freezing me solid mid-gallop. I was starting to charge my magic to try and break out before I was rotated to face an out-of-breath Twilight. "I know that he is your friend but you're acting hysterical." She huffed. "You will never find him if you keep running around like a maniac like you've been doing for the past thirty minutes. So take a deeeeeep breath and calm....down." Twilight took a deep breath herself before exhaling, trying to catch her own from chasing me throughout her castle. Twilight looked at the approaching hoofbeats and the clanking of armor behind me and flicked her hoof across her neck a few times. Realizing that she was telling what I assume were guards that now was not a good time, they backed off. "We'll find him, but you need to calm down and think for a second."

I glared at Twilight with contempt, I was ready to argue back before realizing that I didn't really have any other ideas to find where Princess Luna had taken him. I already sprinted to the infirmary in her castle that I was apparently banned from entering, but was told that he wasn't there. That was my best guess, and its gone now...

Damn it. She's right, but she doesn't have to be so annoying about it.

She slowly released her magical hold on me and set me on the ground, and I begrudgingly sat my rump on the cold, hard floor. I took a deep breath but I wasn't calming down. In fact, I felt myself becoming even more anxious than before. I paused for a moment, took a deep breath, and let it out. I repeated this process several times until I was able to clear my head.

"Alright. I'm calm." I lied.

"No, you're not! Just watch, and do what I do." Twilight took a deep breath and held holding a hoof to her chest. I reciprocated and waited for Twilight to exhale. After a few moments, Twilight blew out and pushed her hoof outward towards me, and I did the exact same thing...not feeling any better. "Feel better? My old foal sitter taught me that a little while ago to help me when I'm feeling stressed about something. It always helps me. Usually." Twilight seemed to be mumbling the last part to herself, but I heard it all. She sighed and I thought that she was going to try and keep me here, but she walked up to me and dropped a hoof on my shoulder. "I know this must be scary for you. Trust me, I've been in this position more than once. But once you catch your breat-"

"OH, JUST SHUT UP! TRIXIE KNOWS!" I yelled, cutting Twilight off mid-sentence and batting her hoof away from me. She recoiled away from my voice while staring at me wide-eyed, recoiling with a wince as she leaned away from me. "TRIXIE IS...She's...I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Twilight. I didn't mean to take it out on you. I just-I'm just worried about him."

"I know...I understand." Twilight replied, giving me a small smile. She paused for a second before walking up and hugging me softly with both her hooves...and her wings? It was a bit weird, but not a bad kind of weird. It felt like I was hugging a pegasus, but I still felt her horn poking the rim of my hat as well. Is it bigger than mine? Still, she was hugging me pretty tightly. It felt nice...

...Hey, there's that Princess hug I was wanting earlier...

I didn't let it go to waste, and I leaned into it and hugged her back as she kept talking. "I'm sorry too, Trixie. You're not the only one that's worried. I'm nervous too, but I'm sure Princess Luna knows what she's doing when she flew off with Edgar..." Twilight seemed to hesitate on the wording she was using, but I was still appreciative that she was trying to help me calm down. "If it's one thing that I've learned, it's that there's no point in getting worked up when we can't do anything about the situation. We're not going to be able to find them if we keep running around. We need to calm down, think, and take this one step at a time. I promise we'll find him."

"...You're being really nice, Twilight." I told her. I am far from calm, but I have to try and put my faith in her. She's been good to me so far, even back then. I really am grateful even if I'm not the best at showing it. "I'm sorry that I didn't want your hug earlier. It's nice..."

Twilight broke the hug a bit earlier than I would like and sat me down. "Now, the doctor from earlier said that he couldn't let Edgar get treated in the same area as the other ponies due to contamination risks from both parties, right?"

I nodded, forgetting that part since I was more focused on that insensitive prick and how he could have been more tactful and kept his mouth shut instead of cal-

Twilight's questions interrupted my train of thought. "And Pony doctors wouldn't really know the best way to treat him since we do not have any documentation on his species anyway, riiiiight?" Again, I nodded. Where was she going with this? It's like she was trying to spell it out to me in the most roundabout way possible. "So who do you think Princess Luna would take him to if he needed help?"

It couldn't be another hospital or anything like that. He would run into the same issue we ran into yesterday with that infirmary. We were lucky when that one yellow pegas-

...Suddenly, it hit me. "BUTTERFLY!" I exclaimed in eureka.

Of course Princess Luna would take him to that Pegasus. While she is only a veterinarian, she and Twilight have already spent hours yesterday questioning Edgar about his diet, allergies, and etcetera. Additionally, she was also the only pony to offer help when Dr. Asshole decided to decline it. At least now when I sprint to him, I have a decent sense of direction. I started to run off as Twilight began musing yet again.

"It wouldn't make sense to try carrying Edgar all the way to her cottage, so she would drop Edgar off in his room and bring Fluttershy to Edgar. At least most of the stuff she might need is still in that room. Oh, and her name is Flutters-OH COME ON!" Twilight yelled at me. I started to hear her wingbeats catch up to me before she landed and galloped next to me. "Trixie, he's going to be okay, but you have to promise you are going to settle down when we find him."

"THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE DEMANDS LESS TALKING AND MORE GALLOPING!" I yelled back at her.

It didn't take long to reach Edgar's guest room in the castle. A few twists and turns and Twilight Sparkle waving off any guard that tried to stop me and I was finally standing at his door. My heart was still racing and it wasn't just from my run to him. I was nervous, but I had know that he was going to be okay. I started by trying to open the door and I was met with a creak as I pulled the handle, but it was locked. There were Lunar guards posted on either side of it armed with spears. They gave a salute to Twilight Sparkle, but one spoke up as they saw us attempt to use the wooden double door once more.

"Your Majesty, Princess Luna is inside at the moment. It may not be our station, but she seems very irritated. It may be best to leave her be." The stallion guard told Princess Twilight Sparkle.

I didn't care like I normally would that he was ignoring me. I had bigger concerns, so I rapped my hoof against the door.

*knock knock knock*

No response...

*Knock Knock Knock*

Still nothing, though this time, I can almost hear something heavy sliding somewhere on the other side of the door.

...

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK SLAP SLAP...SLAP...Slap...slap?*

In the blink of an eye, the door swung open inward, with the sudden change in pressure almost pulling me inward. The wood that I was previously banging on felt much softer and furrier, yet didn't budge all the same. I slowly trailed my gaze up and saw that I was pounding on a very irate-looking Princess Luna's chest. Her coat was ruffled by my hooves and her mane looked disheveled. There was also a noticeable redness around the whites of her eyes. Twilight also seemed a little worried as she looked at me and then shifted her eyes between Luna and I a few times. After she got a good look at me, her anger shifted into great annoyance and I could have sworn I saw her left-eye twitch. "What?" She growled out.

...Huh, Deja vu.

"Oooooh...if it isn't the gracious and forgiving Princess Luna." I broke the silence as I joked nervously, trying to play off my blunder. The magic from her horn illuminating her face showed that she was not amused, so I coughed and tried to get things back on track. "The Great and Powerful Trixie has a Great and Powerful need to see Edgar Jorgensen...He's in there, r-right?" I asked, trying to hold back the shudder in my voice. He's going to be fine. He has to be, so I don't know what I am getting myself so worked up for. This will all just be a silly thing that we will laugh about later.

Luna looked at me with an expression that was hard to read. "...He is...stable." Luna hesitated for a second, but was cut off by another voice.

"Princess Luna, is everything alright?" Asked a quiet, sweet voice. Fluttershy, the timid, yellow Pegasus appeared from behind the double doors. I could barely see her, but I could definitely make out the outline of her head peaking over Princess Luna's shoulder as she gingerly hovered above her, perking up as she saw us. "Oh Twilight! Did you and Trixie come to check on Edgar?"

"Wow Fluttershy, you got here quick. Can we come in?" Twilight asked. "We really want to make sure he is doing okay."

Princess Luna's gaze shifted back at me after hearing Twilight. The longer she looked at me the more her face began to soften before she let out a drawn-out sigh and turned back to Twilight Sparkle.

"You have no need to ask. This is your castle, after all. Please, come in..." Princess Luna stepped aside and started to make her way over to the balcony. As we made our way in, we passed by a thin layer and a thick layer of glass, with the thinner one being etched with Magic dampening containment runes. It looked like an extremely heavy, double-layered sliding glass door that was built into the walls of the crystal castle. It wasn't there when I left Edgar to join the sleep over of Sparkle's friends. They had to have used some sort of sound dampening spell to install it without waking him up. "We're sorry if we seem irritable. We are busy trying to get rid of a pest, but can't think of an easy way how."

Suddenly, a small cloudy thought bubble appeared above Luna's head, with the image of a full moon appearing. Suddenly, a massive chomp appeared in it, turning the full moon into a waxing crescent. Sliding down and hanging his legs off the side, was Discord, the Lord of Chaos.

"You pestered us first, Looney! I'm just trying to understand why you don't bring him to my dear Fluttershy's Cottage? If the Human's going to simply lie there and do nothing the entire night, he may as well do nothing with us. It's Nothing Night, after all." The draconequus suddenly pulled a fishing rod out from behind his ear and sent the line out the window. Soon after he reeled in a bottle of tea that he gave offered to the yellow Pegasus, who squee-d in appreciation.

"We would prefer he is kept here for now, so that we can keep careful watch over him. What we would also prefer is that you leave. The last thing we need is any more distractions." Princess Luna shot back with a glare much to the draconequus' amusement.

"The human's practically a vegetable right now, so it may be better to play it safe and keep him away from the mares, lest they sink their teeth into them with fava beans and a nice marelot, no?"

I heard a poof from above, and when I looked up, I saw a big cloud above us. Staring down from within the cloudy thought bubble was and image of a mostly naked Edgar, and we heard a slow saxophone playing from somewhere in the cloud. He was leaning forward provocatively, and appeared to have a foggy mist covering everything below his waist. "♥Eau my...I'm completely vulnerable right now in a castle filled to the brim with stressed out mares~♥" The copy said flamboyantly in as deep a voice as I could imagine Edgar having. "Edgar" turned and locked eyes with me staring with half-lidded eyes. He put his finger near the corner of his mouth while he waggled his eyebrows at me. "♥I sure hope nopony takes advantage of my Weiner and/or Butt! Think of the scandal...♥". He then winked at me, and I felt my cheeks start to get hot. I cleared my throat and shook my head away from it, but the image was burned into my mind as a tingle ran up my spine. It wasn't Edgar, but hearing Edgar's voice say such bothering things made my imagination run wild. A sudden gust of wind appeared as Fluttershy flew up and flapped her wings at it, dispersing the cloud that Edgar was in and causing it to break up. "Wait, Noooooooooo!"

"Stop being gross, Discord." Fluttershy scolded, shaking off her own blush she started to get before coughing into her hooves. "Now listen Discord. Princess Luna said that Edgar has to stay. All the animals are fed and brushed and the bears are open with figuring out custody of Boo-Bear tomorrow. I'll be back home later tonight. I promise!"

"B-but Fluttershy, what about Nothing Night? I was looking forward to doing nothing with you!" Discord whined, throwing his makeshift fishing pole out the window in a huff. A loud boom could be heard off into the distance, with a bright prink mushroom cloud shadowed the far off mountains behind the Everfree.

"I'm sorry Discord, but I'm afraid I must-" Fluttershy gulped before turning away from Discord in shame."...Do something tonight!"

"NO! You mustn't!" Discord yelled in horror.

"I must!"

"Mustn't!

"I Must!"

"Don't!"

"Must!

"Don't Don't!"

"MUST MUST!"

Discord appeared ready to continue this further until Fluttershy ended him rightly by just...staring at him? He seemed to find it adorable at first, but it was clear that she wasn't going to budge. Discord looks upon Edgar with a quiet fury. "I will never forgive this human for making her do something on Nothing Night!"

"Pox upon our Patience, wouldst thou leave already?!?"

"Alright party-pooper, I'm done with my bit. I'll see you back at the cottage, Fluttershy. Don't take too long~" Discord snapped his fingers, and suddenly he was wearing a shiny jacket with metal studs and sunglasses. He sat down on an imaginary bike before before starting to make engine sounds like "Pyuch" and "Brllloom" with his mouth, revving something up. "I may get bored and go exploring. Hasta la vista, dear!"

And with that, Discord rode an invisible bike off into the direction of the Everfree forest, presumably where Fluttershy might live close to.

Fluttershy flew to the balcony ledge of the room. "Stay OUT of my shed, Discord!" She yelled at the departing delinquent-esque draconequus. After waiting a few moments, she shook her head and turned with a small smile peaking out of the corner of her mouth. "Silly old stallion". She flew over to the IV stand off to the side of Edgar and grabbed the tube. "I wanted to make sure with you Twilight. There shouldn't be anything wrong with using an IV, right?" She held the IV drip's needle next to Edgar's arm until Twilight nearly blew out my eardrums.

"STOP!" She cried out, causing the timid Pegasus to freeze with the needled tube in hoof. "We don't know how different his body is to anything on Equestria. Even if the vitamins they need are correct, a fluid drip for Equestrian beings could either cause hyponatremia or hypernatremia if the saline ratio's are wrong."

Wide-eyed, Fluttershy pulled the needle away from Edgar's arm and put it on the night stand. "Okay. I'll pretend that I never touched this then."

"You're a regular Dea ex Machina, aren't you?" I joked, letting out a relieved sigh. Whatever those were, it might have been bad.

"Thanks. It's a blessing and a curse." Twilight mused as she also seemed relieved. "Sorry Fluttershy, and thank you for making sure. If you want to hydrate him, you will have to do it slowly and manually with regular water."

"So how is she going to do that without drowning him, Sparkle? He's still unconscious." I asked.

"It's not my first time helping a sick creature." On cue Fluttershy wet a damp cloth using a pitcher of water and flew over Edgar. As she pressed it against Edgar's lips, the human made an audible gulp as the muscles in his neck undulated. When seeing this, the yellow Pegasus sighed in relief. "He has a swallowing reflex. This will work for now."

"Indeed. Tis better than nothing." Luna mentioned as she looked over the sleeping human. "Kind Fluttershy, are thine hooves steady enough to take a sample of blood from him? Regardless of whether or not we can use all of your veterinary supplies, we would like to take basic steps to examine him."

"Yes, but why would you need that?" Fluttershy asked, tilting her head in confusion. "All he did was faint from his potassium deficiency. He should just need more bananas and a good night's rest."

"Are yo- Do you seriously not know!?!" I was about to facehoof until I felt a small pinch on my shoulder.

"Please hush for a moment and remain patient, Miss Lulamoon. "Luna reprimanded me. "There is no reason to worry Kind Fluttershy if it was a mistake from our centurion. For all we know, it could just be him fainting from his lack of bananas and nothing else." Princess Luna sounded diplomatic before turning back to Fluttershy. "All the same, we would like to be sure that it was simply him fainting."

That didn't make sense. Was she lying to Fluttershy? Princess Luna saw and heard what everypony else did.

"Sorry. It's been a rough few hours since you left for your cottage this morning and it's a very long story." Twilight apologized, twiddling her hair.

After uncapping a syringe, Fluttershy angled it toward a blue line on the sleeping human's forearm. "Sorry." Fluttershy mumbled at Edgar as she poked the syringe into it, slowly drawing out the crimson ichor. Once it was sufficiently full, Fluttershy withdrew it and replaced the needle with a heart-shaped band-aid on the mark she left. Once she was satisfied, Fluttershy was about to cap the needle before Luna stopped her with a raised hoof.

"Leave it for a moment." Using her magic, Princess Luna took glass cup as her magic washed over it, she placed it onto the table off to the side of the room. "Let some of it out into the glass. This is an older method, but it is still viable to our knowledge. Half should be plenty."

"I thought this was going to a doctor. You need his blood now? Why wo-.... he wasn't missing bananas, was he?" Fluttershy asked with worry starting to coat her voice, but didn't put up an argument with Princess Luna as she did what she asked. When finished, Princess Luna picked up the glass with her hoof and swirled the red liquid, inspecting it as if trying to read fine print before setting it back down on the table. She turned back toward Twilight Sparkle.

"What do you think, Twilight?" Princess Luna asked with stoicism, her face betraying none of the worry everypony else was feeling. Yet, I could sense a deep-seated worry behind her regal demeanor. She had to have at least some concern considering how worried she was for Edgar earlier. How she stood up to Princess Celestia for him...How she was there for him when I wasn't...

"That looks like changeling venom, but it doesn't look murky. I have never seen it so clear before." Twilight said with curiosity. As I looked over Twilight's shoulder to get a better view, I saw a paper-thin layer of a translucent oily substance just barely coating the top. Depending on the angle that I looked at it, the thin sheen changed colors on the surface of the blood almost like a prism or a Rainbow. The light hitting it gave it a morbid beauty. Suddenly, Twilight's eyes shot open wide-open with a gasp. "This isn't normal venom. It has to be a Queen's venom. That means Telsona had to have been the one to bite him."

Luna looked off to the side for a few moments as if she was weighing the situation. Upon looking back at Edgar and the bite marks, she let out a groan before walking over to the baby blue couch and letting her hooves go out from under her. She laid face down across the furniture and resting her head on the forearm rest. Her eyes were shut as she massaged her temples with her hooves. "He never mentioned being bit..."

"H-He was bitten by a changeling?" Fluttershy's ears folded back. She flapped back over to Edgar to look him over before her eyes suddenly seemed to find the marks left on his shoulder. "B-but he didn't look sick or drowsy. He just sat in bed as I wrapped his bandages...barely doing anything." The yellow pegasus's voice started to get quieter and quieter as a sudden realization dawned on her. "Oh my goodness, he was barely moving the entire time. He was so sluggish. How did I miss that...?" She gulped as her voice started to break. "Is he going to be okay? Please tell me he's going to be okay. I don't want him to get worse because of me..."

"Fluttershy, calm thyself." Luna directed, not bothering to lift her head up from the couch. Her tone give off a vibe of her expecting this reaction from Fluttershy.

"We'll make sure he is. Besides, he got his bruises from that dragon and those changelings. Anypony would have thought it was just him being tuckered out." Twilight answered with a comforting hoof stroke on the back of Fluttershy's shoulders. Even then, Twilight's face still had concern painted on it. "There's not a lot of research on Queen venom, there is only one other pony that we know of who was bitten and was able to tell us about it. We only ever assumed that it's like normal venom but more potent. If I had to guess, he probably got it while he was fighting Telsona to protect Apple Bloom."

"...No." Luna countered. "We concede that he was bitten by a Changeling Queen. During his battle? The wound itself seems too clean. In stark contrast to the cuts, scrapes, and bruises that are healing, the bite looks as if it was done with care and nigh any struggle. It resembles a nip or a love bite more than an attempt to tear at him. If she was trying to kill him, she should not have had ample opportunity to be this delicate, especially if Kind Fluttershy missed this bitemark." Luna sighed. "This is giving us too much to think about..."

"What are you trying to say? That he let her bite him?" I asked, suddenly becoming defensive of the sleeping human. I couldn't help the incredulousness from my tone as I spoke, and I started to fiddle with the tip of my hat in annoyance. "Why would he ever let a changeling bite him when we were all on the edge of panic about those damn bugs?" I was not about to let him get a bad reputation or worse because of these changelings.

"Thou must calm thyself as wel-"

I started pacing back and forth in the room. "In fact, that doesn't make sense. Edgar isn't some Himbo herd-hopper that lets any mare he meets get all bite-y and touchy with him." I couldn't help the sparks in my tone when I thought of that smug Telsona. "Especially not a mare with a clown-cart-vagina who hurt a lot of ponies and him! Even if she tried to get a drop on him, Edgar isn't an idiot...even if he is sometimes! He's really strong too! He lifted me up and put me in his car when I got light-headed from casting spells to shrink my w-!"

"Trixie Lulamoon, we were not accusing Noble Edgar of anything. Thou needeth to temper thyself as well." Luna commanded from her makeshift throne. "This revelation is simply raising more questions that remain yet answered. Nothing more."

Twilight interjected. "It'd probably be better if we take care of the immediate issue. Even now, his libedo looks like it's just now starting to increase."

"...Libedo?" I asked out loud, wondering if I heard them correctly.

"Oh..." Twilight coughed in surprise and I could see a blush appearing on her face. "I'm sorry if you left school before they taught Sex Ed, but when a mare and a stallion really really like each other, they write to Princess Mi Am-"

"I know what it means!" I interrupted, feeling a bit warm under my cape. "What does his...libedo have to do with anything?"

"Well he was bit." Twilight explained, as if I knew what any of that meant! "His metabolism also seems slower than ours, especially if it took an entire day for this to start to take effect on him."

"Perhaps...Or he may have been feeling the effects this entire time, though to a lesser degree. This panic attack of his was obviously the last straw that broke the wagon's wheel." Luna's brow seemed to furrowed in anger before letting loose a sigh. Sensing no time for a break, the Night Princess hopped up from her spot on the couch. "He may not be getting good blood circulation with those garments. Kind Fluttershy, do you believe you can get his trousers off?"

Fluttershy started pulling at the pants he was wearing before suddenly seeing something that made her blush. "Umm, the belt buckle is really small. I can't get my hooves in them."

"Can you use thine teeth then?" Princess Luna asked. Fluttershy's eyes darted to bump that was just barely forming below his waist before darting away just as fast. Her blush deepened. "...We understand. We will have to sheer them off then."

"Princess Luna, you can't!" Twilight objected. "Humans love their clothes! It's supposed to be important to their culture!"

"More than modesty, he requires blood flow and careful observation. We shall commission a tailor if he feels so sorely of this. Fluttershy, are you calm enough to handle the shears for his trousers?" Fluttershy nodded and grabbed a pair of thick scissors from her satchel before she began cutting through. "Please make sure you are cutting on the side of his legs. We don't want to snip at anything we can't see. "

As the scissors separated the fabric on one side, she moved over to the other side. She lifted the remaining fabric off Edgar like opening a folded tortilla to reveal...another smaller pair of pants underneath in an almost comical anti-climax. Now that I think of it, I never saw Edgar naked when I had to purify his pants after the...incident when we met. He chose to hide behind my wagon until I finished. Who would have thought he had this underneath as well?

Honestly, it's no wonder he wanted to hide it. This material was a nauseating plaid, with a red base and red and white lines intersecting. It was starting to give me a headache looking at it. Maybe the goal was to turn raunchy mares off, but if that were the case, why would the material be almost see-though and small? It was like the world's ugliest male lingerie, and it needs to come off now! For Edgar, of course.

"Ummm, should I cut that one off too? It looks really tight." Fluttershy asked as she felt where the waistband was, prodding at the edges. "Wait, it's stretchy. I think we can just pull this one off." Fluttershy put her hooves inside the waistband and pulled back, watching as his...His member sprung out like a coiled door stop."EEEEEEKKKK!!!"

It was...it's...oh wow. I am not sure what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't that.

For starters, where the hay was his sheath? It couldn't have been comfortable to be wearing those garments with the risk of chafing, even with the secondary piece of clothing. The tip wasn't flat and was more pointed...or rounded with a sort of cap or a hat? The penis had a clear bead of liquid forming near the tip, along with a small trail running down the length. It was a bit smaller than I imagined from his height, but it was still big enough to have fun with. Alien as it appeared, it was actually quite adorable. It's like a pole with a helmet standing at attention.

It looked like everypony else froze upon seeing it for the first time. Even Princess Luna seemed to be taken aback by the strange sight, before shortly regaining her composure and using her magic to cover him with one of the folded towels from the bathroom.

And its smell...

The towel barely did anything to hide his musk. It confused my nose and made too many things come to mind. It was both familiar and unfamiliar. Like a distant memory that was just out of reach, or a good dream I had forgotten about. A mixture of the sweetness of a baked apple pie, a campfire on a cold night, the smell of ozone in the air after a thunderstorm, and the scent of a freshly cut meadow during a hot and humid day...or a mix, I think. He smelled natural to me.

Masculine. Robust. Raw. Umami. I could smell him for hours if that were all it was, but no there was more...Salt. A noticeable hint of this in his sweat just delicately touched his aroma, like the air of a stormy beach soaking into the earthy musk that clings to him. Earth...Water...even Fire, as this warm, intoxicating scent burns ever so sweetly within my nostrils in all the right ways. No matter how it smelled, I knew it was coming from him. In the back of my mouth, I can almost taste how he's been feeling...where he had been....MMmmmm, I want to taste him~..

"Oooooh-kay, we're definitely going to need to get him a bath sometime later...Trixie, are you okay?" I felt a nudge at my side, snapping me out of my thoughts. I turned toward Twilight, who was leaning away from me with a scrunched up nose and odd eyes as she pointed at me with her wing. "You have a bit of drool near your mouth."

I wiped the side of my cheek, confirming that Twilight was right. "Trixie is fine. She was simply shocked."

"You were staring at it like you were going into heat." Twilight deadpanned with a judge-y deadpan. She shook her head at the great and powerful me. "Bonk, Trixie...Bonk."

"Don't "Bonk" the Great and Powerful Trixie! I'm being serious! I was simply thrown off-guard by its strangeness! Trixie can't be the only pony stunned by it? You're shocked too, right Fluttershy?" I tried ducking out of this conversation by throwing the yellow mare under the wagon, but Fluttershy didn't respond. Her face was frozen in mortification as she floated in the air with beating wings. Suddenly, she zoomed her way over to the bathroom and slammed the door. I heard the faucet turn on, along with the sound of vigorous scrubbing going on in there. "Was it something Trixie said?"

"It may be best to leave Fluttershy to clean herself up. Be tactful around her, but we believe we saw a sprinkle of Edgar's fluids discharge out toward Fluttershy. We suspect some droplets may have landed on her." Luna revealed a bit too nonchalantly.

"Yikes...I owe her an apology after all of this." Twilight seemed to accept this answer with hesitation, and soon I saw a parchment float past me out of the and toward the Purple Princess. Twilight started jotting things down, transfixed on the spire as well. "No sheath...No fur. Clothing doesn't appear to be just important for their culture, but for their species survival...likely to keep sperm cells warm and alive, but why wouldn't their bodies have anything to protect the testes and penis to begin with? To increase surface area and help with cooling? Note, "Ask Edgar when he wakes up"."

Seriously?

"Would you put that down Sparkle? This is hardly the time."

"Trixie, it might be important later. It also means I can purchase new clothes for him and have it be a justified expense for health reasons. While we help him, we want to pay close attention to any variance in his reaction to the changeling venom as well. We don't have much experience with a Queen's venom, and we've never seen how a Human would react to it."

My ears dropped and flattened against my head after hearing that. "So we don't know how to treat him or if he's going to get better?"

Twilight shook her head. "I didn't say that. We have a decent amount of experience with changeling bites to form theories as to its purposes, so we should have a good idea of what to expect."

"Which is?" I asked impatiently. Everypony else seemed so worried back there, but all I'm seeing is that he has a stiffy now. What's the big deal?

"Well, we think changelings evolved to take advantage of reproductive instincts and emotions. We've seen a variety of symptoms from different changeling bites, with each serving an apparent purpose." Twilight started listing of things left and right, seemingly happy to be able to share her knowledge despite the circumstances. "Lethargy to weaken ponies, Arousal to make prey easier to track and feed on, increased heart rate to circulate it, increased sensitivity to touch and temperatures. Headaches..."

"He was complaining about headaches earlier...We thought he was dehydrated." Princess Luna remarked, staring out into the balcony as she was starting to take most of this in. Fluttershy continued to wet the cloth and hold it against his lips as if cued by this comment.

"Anything that could increase his heartrate would circulate the venom faster and cause a worse headache, which to make it harder for a dizzy pony to fight back. There had been speculation that a Changeling Queen's venom would be a more concentrated version of normal changeling venom. However, there isn't much known about it since the only other reported bite was from my brother. It was already outside of his system by the time the whole incident was over with, so we can only go with what he told us he felt when he was with Queen Chrysalis, or when he was with who he thought was my foal sitter.

"Again, you're going to have to tell me more about this one day." I stated before a thought just popped up in my head. "...Twilight, if your brother was bitten by a changeling disguised as his fiancé, then..." I shut up, thinking that I was right about my assumption. Thankfully, Sparkle seemed to notice where I was going with that line of thought.

"I know what your thinking, and no. He was adamant about waiting for marriage. He did say that he kissed and cuddled with my fake foal-sitter, but he had his own Chasity enchantment to help him with his urges. They were never broken or tampered with."

A few muffled knocks at the door broke us out of our conversation, and a deep mare's voice came along with them. "Your Majesty, First Centurion Scarlett Blush has arrived and is reporting as you have requested."

"Ah good. An expert opinion...Enter." Princess Luna gave permission, and in walked a female thestral guard. Her voice was familiar...I think she was the one that caught me in the car with Edgar and mistook his wet finger for...leeeeewd conduct. She was also the same one that shoved me away from Edgar when he first collapsed. The one that ordered all the other guards to keep me away from him when I was just trying to help...I don't like this mare, and I'll need to be careful around her. "How fare's the Castle's perimeter? We understand that it may have interrupted your investigation of Laughter's bakery."

"It's roughly what you would expect. There are no reports or signs of changeling presence since you helped us set up the wards, and Ponyville has been mostly quiet. It should be back in its former glory in another day or two. A final report about timeline of events leading up to this invasion is being drafted and finalized, and I will be approving it once everything looks to be in order." Scarlett spoke with an almost military-grade professionalism, almost like a commanding officer. However, it was seasoned with a deep falsetto and cut with a feminine edge. She honestly sounded like how an escort would talk if they were trying to play guard. I know it may sound wrong, but I didn't have any other way to describe it. "As for Sugarcube Corner, this investigation was concluded a short time before Princess Twilight called us to try and apprehend our treasured guest before he collapsed. It ended up raising more questions, but I think it is safe to say that no further scrutiny is needed there."

"You were investigating Sugarcube Corner? For what?" Twilight Sparkle inquired.

"Our apologies, Princess Twilight. I was not informed that you had yet to be filled in." Scarlett said as she bowed to Twilight. "Upon Luna's orders, I received permission from the owners after it was discovered that this was where Private Spoon was captured. There were some weird things going on there, and my findings will be included in our report." The red-eyed thestral turned toward dark navy Alicorn and bowed once more. "Your majesty, may I request permission to remove my helmet. It has been a very long day."

Princess Luna nodded, and the thestral took off her helmet. "Thank you, your majesty...Can never really stretch as much as I want to with it on and the added weight from the crest can wear on you after a time." Craning her neck, I could hear a few pops before she readjusted and hung her helmet on a latch at her side. As it came off so too did the concealing enchantment that these guard helmets have as they faded from her body in a shimmer. She flipped her hair away from her face and I finally got a better look at this "Scarlett Blush".

She had an dark grey coat, and true to her namesake her face's fur seemed to show a red tint near her cheeks and around her eyes. Dark azure hair with crimson highlights just barely accenting her mane hung around chin height. She seemed tough, but it appeared to come from her attitude more than any physical scars or abrasions of which there were none to speak of. There weren't even any marks near her lips despite them being common for thestrals to have from teething. In fact, she looked borderline immaculate apart from the fact that she had a bitch-resting face right now.

Actually, there is one flaw that I'm seeing right now. Now that I got a better look at her eyes and the hair being moved away from her face, I can juuust barely see wrinkles starting to form under her eyes. If I had to give a guess, she is probably in her mid thirties. That, or late twenties and is just aging poorly. All in all she didn't look too scary, though she just look just about "done" with today.

She seemed to notice me staring, and she raised an eyebrow at me. "Is there a problem?"

"No." I said, matching her eyebrows.

"...Good. It is starting to get a bit late into my shift, so I would like to get this investigation on the way. I have a theory or two, but I would like to make sure they aren't what I think they are." The Centurion walked over to Edgar's side, right next to me as she started to slowly look over him. "Huh, that's interesting." This soon evolved into touching and prodding him. Brushing his hair away from his forehead, looking around his body. As her eyes started to scan downward, she reached a hoof toward the towel covering his privates and took it off.

Okay, now there's a problem.

"What the actual buck are you doing? That's where his penis is!" I hissed.

"You're very perceptive. That is where is his penis is. I saw the tent a day before and I've been called to look him over. He was bitten by a Changeling sometime between his arrival and his episode in the hallway." Scarlett's voice was matter-of-fact, clinical, and downright patronizing. She didn't seem to be bothered by the fact that Edgar was aroused or that she was so close to the hard-on.

"Okay, well you already established that after you already had your lips all over him. What's your point, mare within fireball distance?" I asked politely and with no ill intent.

She still wasn't looking at me, but she did tear her gaze off of Edgar to look forward with pursed lips."Is there a way I can ask everypony except the Princesses and the bearer of Kindness to leave Edgar's room?" Scarlett said before turning my direction.

I felt my nostrils flare. That would leave me and only me leaving the room..."Are you being serious with me right now?"

"Are you actually his marefriend?" The piercing sharp eyes of the thestral asked, or more like interrogated. "Are you in a herd with him?"

"...It's complicated." I tried brushing off.

"Oh?" Scarlett asked as she stared at me with a frown. "Well I don't think there's anything complicated about a "yes or no" answer. If you can't say yes to any of those questions, I think you should probably leave."

"Who do you think you are?" I asked, getting into her face. Scarlett clearly didn't mind, as she reciprocated and got within inches of mine.

"Centurion First Class Scarlett Blush, and I'm somepony who really doesn't like-" As tension crackles like static electricity in the air, threatening to ignite into a full-blown confrontation, a sudden interruption pierces through the charged atmosphere.

I was seconds away from getting into hooves with this mare until Twilight Sparkle spoke up and interrupted us. I felt myself sliding away from her on the tile floor as Twilight leaned in between the two of us. she held out her hoof toward the Lunar guard. Her presence like a gentle breeze amidst a thunderstorm brewing between the two of us. "Excuse me? Hi, I'm Twilight Sparkle. It's good to meet you Miss Scarlett. May I please call you that or do you prefer First Centurion?"

Whatever bitchiness Scarlett had seemed to evaporate completely in Twilight's presence. Seeing Twilight's hoof hanging out, Scarlett bumped her hoof into it and let Twilight lead the hoofshake."...Whichever you prefer, your majesty. It's an honor."

"The honor is mine! I'm pretty sure that Princess Luna has been saying good things about you." Twilight glanced over at me. "This is my friend, Trixie, or "The Great and Powerful" for some. She actually came here with Edgar and she has known Edgar longer than all of us... while it might not be a long time, I don't think it is fair to ask her to leave her friend like this. Especially with how worried she was the entire time today...She's actually the closest thing to a herd mate or family he has right now, even if they might not be dating or anything like that."

"Yea, who does this mare think she i-OW?" I felt a pinch pulling at my cheek as if to chastise me. A voice echoing in my head caused me to jump.

("I get it Trixie, but that's not helping.")

When did Twilight Sparkle learn how to do that!?

Twilight Sparkle continued and gave off the best puppy-dog eyes she could, but it was clear that she could use a bit more practice. It looked like her eyes were going to pop out of her head. "Is there any way you can be patient with her for just a little while longer? Pretty pleeeeease?"

"...Among other things, I'm checking for other bites and not just the one on his shoulder. I'd prefer to not get my train of thought interrupted by an ignorant Unicorn who is trying to get in my way."

"We shall make an exception for Miss Lulamoon's case. She can stay provided she allows you to perform your inspection." Princess Luna turned back to me. Though she initially sounded stern, there was a hint of sympathy as she continued to speak. "We ask for thine patience, Miss Lulamoon. She is simply following protocol. We personally attest to Scarlett's skill as she is one of my most trusted Centurions. She displays exceptional leadership and receives high praise amongst the guard under her command, and the only reason I have not suggested her for due promotion yet is simply due to there not being any retirements as of late. She also has extraordinary intuition and investigative skills. She has been known to snuff out changelings and other intruders from a simple glance before-"

"I think he was almost raped..." Scarlett spoke up suddenly with a far off look in her eyes.

Everypony in the room froze at this revelation. You could hear a pin drop in the room as a shadow came across everypony's features. There wasn't a sound in the room that I could register aside from everypony's breathing. Despite that, I could still hear Edgar's voice echoing in my head.

"Back home, I watched the show and watched your episodes in particular. Heck, I still remember what you said when the dragon was trying to eat us. You know what it feels like, right? To want feel great? To want feel important?" He asked me, almost as if to beg for my approval for the lie he was telling these ponies.

"No...no, not Edgar. No, he would have told us if he was ra-...if he was ra-ha-..." I couldn't get it out. I didn't want to think about it or believe it.

No, he wouldn't have told me, would he? He was already doing his best to lie his way through Equestria, but his reasoning was because he wanted to "feel good about himself". He lied about his accolades and make himself seem important, but was it just to be boastful like me? Was he trying to hide what happened to him? I know that he was being quiet about what actually happened when he was trying to survive his encounter with the changelings, but...

The bathroom door creaked open, a small amount of steam misted out of the opening. Emerging from the frame was Fluttershy, who walked over from her spot at the bathroom door and stopped right next to the left side of Edgar's makeshift hospital bed. "That's HORRIBLE!" Fluttershy frowned at the bite on Edgar's neck, her lips trembling as she tried blinking back her own tears.

"Trixie...do you need a minute?" I heard Twilight's voice ask gently. I shook my head with pursed lips. I have to be strong for him. "Are you going to be okay?" I nodded at Twilight as I did my best to hold in my tears but...oh Faust why couldn't you just be honest with us and tell us what happened? I would have listened...

Everypony else stayed quiet until Luna broke the silence. "Thou art certain of this, Centurion? In the middle of the battle, that he was violated?"

"No...almost. There is a big difference between the two, and you can really tell once you've seen them side by side. Those ponies are haunting to look at. Like they had a piece of them stolen. It's how they feed, by the way." Scarlett's face darkened as if she was speaking from experience of things she had seen. "For starters, he wasn't jumping at shadows while we were pulling his carriage to Ponyville. There aren't any bites near his inner thigh either, so he didn't take off his pants willingly or anything like that. Besides, his belt and pants were still in one piece when we brought him to the castle. Since you had to cut them off of him just now, so I would bet my favorite fang that Telsona was not able to have a chance to do what she wanted...But she is a changeling. She had to be thinking about it, and I bet she's the type that would keep talking and talking. Letting him know exactly what she wanted to do to him." Her eyes looked up toward Edgar as they narrowed, before she put the towel back over his privates. "Poor guy..."

I thought back to my trip in the car with him...

...

"Well, Luna said you fought with the Queen. How are you still alive after that?" I asked him, not understanding how he got out of that situation mostly unscathed. He went up against something that even scared Twilight!

"Dumb luck. She ended up talking a lot more then actually doing anything else." Edgar paused for a moment before shaking his head. "I was able to keep her distracted long enough to stab her eye."

...

"Why didn't he say anything?!?" Twilight shouted in frustration as she trotted over to the opposite side of the bed where I was standing. "When we asked, all he did was make jokes and compare her to Merry Pop-Ins and Syth Lore'd. We were having fun! We were even teasing each other the entire time!"

Scarlett mused with a small chuckle as she shook her head. "Please don't take this the wrong way, but you still have a lot to learn about stallions, your majesty. They aren't "Obvious" like us mares. We give them so many hints and make it so clear what we are thinking and feeling that it is a wonder why they still have such a hard time figuring out what we want. Stallions are simpler, but a whole different beast altogether. They want the same things we want, like sex, security, and fulfillment. The only difference is that they'll just either tell us flat out or bottle it up. There is no in-between and they do a much better job at bottling it up than us. Lot of 'em like telling jokes or just saying they're "fine". They'll do that to avoid talking about anything remotely uncomfortable or challenging to their self-image, since it's their pride as a stallion at stake. He must have felt ashamed about that powerlessness." Scarlett cleared her throat after a moment. "He had an Earth Pony filly with him. A family member of one of the elements. Did she say anything about this?"

Twilight paused and looked away. "We didn't get much of a chance to ask Apple Bloom about her time or how she was feeling about all of this, and we didn't want to bother her family to interview her so soon after what she went through. We have to make sure Apple Bloom is fine as well. If she saw anything bad, she'll need somepony to talk to if she has any hard questions to answer."

"Sir Edgar himself was extremely brief when our sister and I were pressing him on his encounter, and did not wish to go into details." Princess Luna melancholily mused with the tragedy of the situation not being lost on her.

"That tracks. When was the last time you ever saw a stallion cry in front of you without you letting them know its alright? Stallions like to see themselves as thee protectors of their herds and families, but we can't expect them to be invincible all the time, even if they think they need to be. That's why we have to give them something to lean on. To ease up the burden and give'em what they are missing. Help them pour out some of that stress they've been bottling up, you know?" Scarlett turned back to Edgar, her eyes seemed to be looking through him as if she was looking at something else. "I don't think he has a mare he can trust yet. Otherwise he would have told her." I felt a pit in my stomach upon hearing that. "How long has he been out? Since that panic attack in the hallway?"

"Princess Luna said it was roughly an hour ago. " Fluttershy said, not breaking her eye contact with the mark on Edgar's shoulder. "Probably a more than that now."

"I haven't heard of venom outright knocking ponies out, but we ain't never seen a pony walking around for that long without getting treated for a bite, have we? I am sure that all activity earlier would have raised his heartrate to an insane level. More than likely the venom's effects on his state of fear caused the panic attack, and the panic attack circulated the venom through his bloodstream... Vicious cycle. He had to be really scared of something for that to happen, wouldn't he?" Scarlett turned back to me with her gaze lingering on me longer than I would have liked before turning back to the group. "Alright. I don't know what his species is like, but we may have to play it safe and assume he's gonna need to be tamed."

"Excuse you?" I was doing my best to stare down the audacity of this bitch. "Tamed? He needs help, not a bucking collar and leash!"

Twilight held up her hoof to stop interrupt me. "Trixie, no. Not like a manticore tamer or a human tamer." Twilight butted in once more to try and put out the fuse that this insufferable old bat keeps lighting. "It's for Stallions. Sometimes ones who are in a rut, or if one is bitten by a changelings, or if a stallion has been injured and can't really do it themselves. You know how mares sometimes hire a cooler to help with their heats." I nodded begrudgingly. "Its like a cooler for us mares, but for stallions that can't take care of it themselves. They're just not really needed since most stallions are in herds that can help take care of that kind of thing." Twilight turned back to the sleeping human with a worried face. "...Which Edgar isn't."

"Soooo..." I see where this is going, but I still hoped I was wrong.

"Yeah. Somepony is gonna have to help him with that."

"After he was almost rrrrrrr-" I quickly changed where the sentence was going with a huff. "Are you joking?"

Scarlett's stance suddenly became rigid as she flared her dark leathery wings momentarily stretch them, before folding them back tightly against her sides. Her ears flattened against her head in visible irritation. "Grow up and say it already. He was almost raped, but the bigger issue is that bite and the venom that is messin' with him. Trauma or no, somepony has help him with it. Otherwise, he'll just run into the exact same situation that led him to fainting in the first place. Besides, if his erection lasts longer than three hours we may not have a choice." Scarlett said, a hint of annoyance in her voice as she pointed her hoof at the tent Edgar made. "There is a reason that stallions aren't supposed to have constant boners and stay in the bedroom with us all the time. If it stays like that for four hours or longer, his blood could clot and we would need to drain it...from there." Everypony save for Scarlett Blush and Princess Luna winced at hearing that. "If done improperly and without magic to heal him, or if not done at all, he could end up losing the ability to ever have an erection or foals, let alone keep it. It might be better to ask for forgiveness first, rather than wait for permission later if he doesn't wake up in time." She turned back to Princess Luna. "Your majesty, I can handle it if you wish."

...

"...The buck is that supposed to mean?" I asked, trying to keep my voice as level as possible. "No, if he needs my help with this, then Trixie will help him with this. It is the least Trixie can do after saved her and Ponyville. He doesn't need some strange mare he doesn't know to molest him in his sleep."

"Sure, and a "friend" molesting him in his sleep is so much better? Yeah, how about no? I will volunteer myself. Besides, any of the other night mares that volunteer could use some training on how to handle these cases. It could be a good learning opportunity, so long as we have our majesty's permission." Scarlett's voice was cold and matter-of-fact. She didn't seem to care about my opinion in the slightest. Did she even care about Edgar, or is she looking for an excuse to get her rocks off? "Look, Miss Lulamoon. This is strictly to treat him, so you are better off leaving it to mares more qualified than you. From what I saw so far, you might just make things worse. I gave him CPR to save his life while you just shouted and hollered like a banshee and made things worse for him. If you really care for him, it's probably better you leave him be."

"That's not fair. I was calling for help!"

"And here I am. Help has arrived, now back off."

I was starting to get desperate to keep her away from him, so I pulled out the bat-pony card."...You'll give him co-RONA-virus!"

"Co- Okay, I'm starting to lose my patience with you! Are you his marefriend? Yes or no?" Scarlett barked.

"Trixie said it was complicated..."

"Well uncomplicate it then. "Scarlett's red eyes were cold and cutting as she stared me down. "Either you're dating him and regularly hooking up, or you aren't and his business is none of yours. If you aren't, get out."

"Trixie is working on it, and she will be staying right here. Trixie won't ever try leaving him alone again." I held my ground.

"Nope. You're done." She outright declared, pointing to the door. "You shouldn't even be near him either, now that I got better idea of the type of mare you are. You know what I think?"

"I don't care."

"...I think he was running away from you earlier, judging from that look he gave you." Her eyebrows scrunched up as she started mad-dogging me, looking me up and down with her eyes lingering a bit longer at the floor before looking back up to my eyes. "Who do you think he was asking us to keep away from him? He never did finish his sentence, but he was facing your direction when he was freaking out, wasn't he? Who was he begging not to hurt him?"

I narrowed my eyes and barred my teeth at her. "Don't you dare insinuate that. Trixie had nothing to do with any of that and would never hurt Edgar. It was because Trixie wasn't there to help him that this all happened. This was all Princess C-"

Scarlett scoffed and growled, interrupting me. "Trixie this, Trixie that. Trixie wasn't there for him? Seems to be a running theme, doesn't it?" I started to feel a vein popping out from my forehead. This bitch is crossing a line.

"Can we please all just calm down and count to ten...ummm, please???" Fluttershy's desperate request barely registered with me.

"Do you have something to say to the Great and Powerful Trixie, Bitch?" I lit my horn up.

("Trixieeeee...enough.")

"Don't care! Gonna cast "Hoof" any second now to this thirsty cougar's teeth." I purposefully thought out loud in a vague hope she could hear me. I felt myself get more and more furious. The sound of blood rushing through my ears started to drown out the voices of reason screaming at me not to do this.

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. Your hoof...now." Scarlett demanded more than asked, holding her hoof out.

"Careful what you ask for..." I growled out, tensing up my body and hyping myself up. I reared it back, but before I could even react she suddenly swept my foreleg up and twisted painfully as she practically dragged me over to Edgar's side. "OW-OW-OW! Unhoof Trixie, you brute! I KNOW MY RIGHTS!" I grunted in pain while subject to this restraint hold, and the more I tried to fight with it, the more it ended up hurting. I even tried teleporting out of it, but the second my horn lit up it was nipped in the bud with a painful twist to break my concentration. She was surprisingly strong for her stature.

What's everypony else doing, you may ask? Nothing! They're just standing there and watching while this whorse was trying to rip my foreleg off. They just stood there and watched as she mare-handled and pulled me over to Edgar. They just stood there and watched as Scarlett Blush grabbed and held my hoof right next to the hoof-shaped...bruise on Edgar's face.

The hoofmark I left on him the morning after I met him...My hoofmark...

"What, nothing cute to say? You thought I'd just skim by this? I don't think something as big as a Changeling Queen could leave a hoofmark this small, do you? Was this hoofmark from a normal Changeling? Nope. This one look a bit older than the other bruises he had. Where was he getting the older bruises from, Miss Lulamoon?" One of Scarlett's leathery wings extended and the bony prong near the tip started pointing to the older bruises. "What about this one, or this one?"

All of a sudden, all the rage I was feeling was washed away by an icy cold dread that seeped deep into my bones. My mouth went dry, and I couldn't even think of any response I could give.

"I-it was..." I could barely mutter. I felt a lump in my throat and I was starting to choke on my words. "T-those ones came from when he saved Trixie from dragon." A weak excuse came from my mouth. Those other ones weren't my fault. It was when he crashed his car into the dragon...but if he didn't need to save me from it, then he never would have had those bruises to begin with...right?

My eyes were starting to get misty as I looked at the bruises starting to get more pronounced than before. They looked so much more worse and obvious now, but nothing was as blinding as the shiner that I left on his cheek...

He tried protecting ponies like it was second nature to him, but who's protecting him?!? I should have been a stronger mare. I should have been there to protect him, but instead of that I'm hurting him.

"Centurion, that is enough..."

Scarlett didn't let up her interrogation as she kept pushing. I was making fun of her for sounding like a wannabe escort before, but her falsetto may has well been a stiletto as she twisted the knife further and further into my heart. "Really, the hoofprint too? And what was with the rocking carriage yesterday? Of course, he had a wet claw and I thought you two were actually an item for a bit, but a few witnesses saw you yelling at him right before the windows on his carriage appeared. Even when I checked on you two after we finished dragging his carriage, you had a small smile you were trying to hide. Him? He looked really uncomfortable caught in the same place as you."

She narrowed her eyes at me as if I was a murderer. "So what happened? Did he say "no" one too many times? I bet you had a lot of pent-up frustrations to work out with him being a unwanted hermit in the Everfree for all that time. He's big and strong, but too much of a gentlecolt to want to hurt a poor, misunderstood, lonely mare like you. Really just has awful luck with girls, don't he? Going from you to Telsona to right back to you. And now that he doesn't have a choice , you think you got a golden opportunity to sit on his lap and take care of bo-""

"WE SAID THAT'S ENOUGH!"

Princess Luna's glowing eyes and booming voice finally put an end to the argument and shattered the will of both the myself and the thestral as we felt ourselves get telekinetically pried away from each other. A dull rumbling started to make itself known and I felt a great weight from above pressing down on me, forcing me onto my knees. A bow was the only position I could muster to stop myself from getting flattened under the immense gravity I was feeling. "This day has been eventful enough without the two of you fighting with each other like petulant foals. About who gets to lay with an unconscious stallion, no less! Sir Edgar had what we assume is the worst day of his life, which considering what we know happened so far, is amounting to be QUITE THE FEAT!" She continued to dress us down, the torrent of air would have blown my hat straight off my head had it not also been pressed down on my crown by the gravitational force she was applying to us. I could just barely look and see that Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy were already holding a pillow on either side of the sleeping Edgar's ears, and this was the only relief I felt.

Princess Luna's voice echoed through the room, the walls seeming to vibrate with her words. "We shall not condone shallow mares who don't have the tact to read the tragedy of this situation argue like school-fillies in a rivalry. Not in Princess Twilight's Castle! Not during our Night! If-When he wakes up, you can ask him politely if you can help him with this. We. Do. Not. Care. But not a moment before!" I felt the literal weight lift from my shoulders and I felt my muscles start to relax. I turned toward the thestral, who seemed to be stuck in the forced bow. Princess Luna refocused her ire to the Scarlett Blush, who was gritting her teeth under what I imagined was the same weight I was put under. Luna's eyes appeared to leak some form of dark miasma from their corners and a low growl could be heard from Princess Luna's throat."Centurion Scarlett Blush, what sickness has befallen thee?!? You shame us and the Lunar guard in front of Princess Twilight, and you shamed Miss Trixie Lulamoon with your slanderous provocations!"

"Your majesty, she is a not a good pony." Scarlett grunted under the immense gravity she found herself under. "She enslaved this town. She left him outside to die with nearly half-a-hundred changelings. I don't think all those bruises were from the changelings or the dragon! She doesn't give a shit about him!"

"He himself admitted to fighting with a dragon not long before he defended Ponyville." Luna countered. "Trixie herself sounded quite enamored with this feat. And while dragons do not have hooves, changelings do. That bruise could have been caused by any of them. Can you prove it was Miss Lulamoon's doing?"

"Your majesty, I still can not stand idly by knowing that she is in the same room as him, or even sleeping in the same castle. Not with the evidence there already is. If you want "proof", look at what she tried to do. You saw how she almost flew off the handle to attack me. She tried attacking Princess Celestia! What do you think she'd do to somepony like him? Why is she still here?!?"

"Indeed, she did attack thee. We saw that thou instigated her with what we believe is called "Dueling words". Quite unbecoming of my guard. Regardless, this is not thine decision, is it?" Princess Luna declared, as her voice and stare bore into the thestral. "When we questioned Edgar, he was staunch and steadfast in defending Miss Lulamoon's honor as a pony more so than he even tried defending his own honor!"

Scarlett Blush, under great strain, appeared to slowly rise against the great weight affecting her. The veins in her muscles and face appeared to protrude as she looked up at the Princess of the night. I couldn't believe it. She was resisting her magical restraint and looking Princess Luna dead in the eye to...to protect him from me.

"Defending...an abuser....is TOO common! You didn't see how petrified he was of her! She's a fucking monster!!!" The humming grew louder and the centurion's legs buckled back into a bow as Luna's voice turned more authoritative.

"Watch thine tone, Centurion. It is just as common if not more so to defend the honor of somepony that one fancies. Were I to claim that any of Shining Armor's scars were due to Princess Mi Amore Cadenza's mistreatment, not a moment would pass before our niece would strike at us for daring to do so. Were he not the gentlecolt he is, we would wager Shining Armor would strike us before Cadance could even react. Trixie Lulamoon is innocent until proven otherwise." With that declaration, the wooden doors swung open contingent of night guards entered the room, with a pair of shackles to place on the mare. The humming ceased and Scarlett's muscles physically relaxed as she fell to the floor. "First Centurion Scarlett Blush... For now, you are to remain in the dungeon for the night and reflect on what thou had done. You did not make good choices tonight, but we shall look the other way once. It would be a shame for thee to have thine stainless career shattered with one bad night. Do not waste this second chance. You are dismissed."

"...At once, your majesty." A barely restrained growl of frustration came from Scarlett as she turned to march out of the room, the cat-like pupils of her eyes shot toward me for one last time before re-adjusting and refocusing forward. The clops of her hooves paused at the heavy glass slide that Princess Luna's magic pulled open with little strain. "He needs a tamer."

Princess Luna nodded with a stern glare at the black-haired bat pony. "Duly noted...Leave." As the Lunar guards exited the room with the shackled centurion, Princess Luna let out a deep sigh as she slid the glass door closed once more. With that the dark miasma surrounding her dissipated. "We are sorry thou had witnessed that. A madness appears to have overtaken thine castle, for her to act as brashly as she has in front of us. There must be a pattern or cause that we are not seeing." Princess Luna turned to look back and forth between the other ponies in the room. To a wide-eyed and shocked Twilight. To a near-trembling Fluttershy. Her gaze finally rested on Edgar and lingered longer than the other ponies...I wonder if she was staring at the hoofmark too...

Princess Luna finally tore her gaze away to look at me. "You were far from innocent in your exchange...but we understand that you have deep concerns for your friend. We offer our humblest apologies for the behavior of our centurion. Those accusations were abhorrent."

"I've never seen anypony speak with you like that, let alone one of your own guards..." Twilight said in frightened wonder.

"Indeed. It is not uncommon for her to speak open and casually around us. We much welcome her honesty normally. Even if she can be vexing at times, we know she has good intentions behind her actions. She is very protective of her own regimen and the stallions within it especially. This, however...This was much too far. She had never crossed a line such as this. For her future in our guard, we hope that she reflects heavily on what she said and done tonight..." Luna turned paused and turned back to me. "You may rise, Miss Lulamoon. We stopped restraining thee for quite some time."

I didn't bother getting up. I just laid there in silence, tears starting to roll down my face as I replayed the scene that led to that hoofprint over and over in my mind. Each frame etched with painful clarity caused the weight of my actions hangs heavy upon my shoulders, and I was feeling suffocated by the guilt of my own selfish recklessness. I was such a stupid pony...

"...Miss Lulamoon. We asked thee to stand." Her tone was kind and gentle, something I'm not. I didn't deserve to be treated like this, especially after what I did to him.

His bewildered expression, the pain etched into his features as my hoof made contact with his cheek, the sharp sound of a slap echoing in the wooden wagon. Each moment serves as a stark reminder of the havoc my pride wreaked upon us both. I even started to feel a dull thudding against my right hoof, the same one I hit him with. Scarlett was right about me. How could I do that to him?

...Why did I have to hit him? Why....

"She's right..." I admitted, starting to feel as if my cape and hat were turning to lead. I caught the ear of both princesses. "I'm still a monster...I did hit him..."

Twilight, inquisitive since every time I met with her, asked the first question. "What do you mean? Like you hit him on accident? Did he surprise you or something?" She had too much faith in me.

"I hit him in his sleep! I couldn't be a big mare and just tell him the truth, could I? Not big enough to admit that when we got drunk, I practically forced myself on him the night we met... I made him think he had soiled himself on my bed and his pants." I finally looked up, I got the exact looks that I was expecting. Shock and apprehension, a fraction of what I deserved...

"What are trying to say right now, Trixie?" Twilight asked with a scolding tone flavored with disbelief.

"What do you mean you "forced yourself" on him?" Even the yellow veterinarian was looking at me with such disappointment in that stare of hers. I deserved it...

"We were drunk and I rubbed myself on him...He drank a whole bottle's worth of wine and didn't try hard to stop me. Trixie thought he was enjoying it..." I kept admitting to things. I'll admit to everything in the hopes that somepony would slap me back. Kick me. Do something on Edgar's behalf. That thestral didn't get enough of a chance to do it. Everything she said hurt, and I deserved every syllable that was ringing in my ears right now. "When I woke up I was so scared of how he'd react that I tricked him into thinking he wet himself. I didn't want him to remember what I did."

"...That's really bad, Trixie." Fluttershy said after a few moments of silence. "Really, really bad..."

"He believed me because he had a nightmare of the dragon he fought with...A Nightmare! How could I do that to him...?" I buried my head into my hooves. "It wasn't the only time I hit him. I did it again our way to the castle. I didn't do it hard because of all the bruises he had...but I still hit him. I hit him even after I saw all the bruises...I was just so mad at him! I made him promise not to get hurt and put himself in danger, and he immediately broke it for that filly and ran into Telsona." Tears were starting to build up in my eyes and my body started to shake in frustration. I was mad. Mad at him. Mad for him. Mad at myself. Mad at everything...

"Did he even know her name??? What made her so special for him to get hurt?!? Why did it have to be him? Now I find out that he was almost ra-" I sniffled as I wiped my nose and eyes. My voice was starting to get gravelly as my throat started to hurt. "Ra-...He was...Oh FAUST I should have stayed with him outside! I never should have left him. I shouldn't have abandoned him last night to go to that stupid sleepover! Every time I leave him alone, something bad happens to him! I left him again and now he's not waking up...And now he- he- he-" My stuttering sobs kept interrupting me as I stared up into the ceiling, sobbing as my tears ran down my face. "I'm sorry Edgar! I'm so sorry! I'm sorry...I'm so soooo sooorry..." Everypony in the room was silent and just listening to my wails, and that was the worst part for me... Are they so disgusted with me that they're speechless???

Through a blur of tears, it looked like Twilight and Luna were looking at each other, as if they were having a silent conversation with each other. They looked to each other before slowly turning back to me.

"...Thank you for your candor, Miss Lulamoon." Princess Luna's soft voice broke the deafening silence, shocking me. Why doesn't she sound furious with me? She looked ready to bite Princess Celestia's head off earlier today, and that's her own flesh and blood! She doesn't even know me!

"Trixie, you're still sobbing. Just please take a few deep breaths." Twilight Sparkle walked up and placed her hoof on my back, stroking the fur beneath my cape. It didn't help in the slightest...I wiped my stinging eyes with my cape and saw that Twilight was giving me a sad smile. Like she was doing her best to persuade me to stop. "If you don't stop crying, you're gonna make me wanna cry."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just want him to be okaaaaay..." I sucked in air through my teeth as I tried to get my voice under control.

Princess Luna's tone did not change. "He will be, but we do not believe it is best for thee to be here right now. Perhaps thou should leave and rest."

"L-leave?!? No, NO! I just got him back! Please don't take him away from me!" I begged Princess Luna. "If I leave, then something bad will happen!!!"

"Like what, Trixie?" Twilight asked.

"I don't know...but it'll happen. It happens Every! Single! Time!!!" I beat a hoof against the floor with every word. My tears were starting to build up again and I couldn't stop them. "I just want to help him...Please don't make me leave him..."

Twilight shook her head. "He'll be there when you come back, but he doesn't need you to hover over him the entire night. There's not much you can do to help right now Trixie, so why don't you get some rest."

"Trixie knows he doesn't need her, but Trixie wants to be there for him!" I pleaded with the Princesses, looking for some form of sympathy. Anything! "So what if he's dumb sometimes? It makes him who he is! He does the dumbest things only to make everything better at the end an-and he says the nicest things only to ruin it by saying something dumb, but I don't care! He's special! He is the bravest, stupidest, kindest, most infuriating stallion Trixie ever met, and Trixie loves him!" I shouted out to anypony in the world who might have been listening.

I know exactly what I just said, but finally saying it just felt right..."I love Edgar!!!" I can't give up on him now. Not when he needs me. There has to be something I can do...there is something I can still do for him... "H-he still needs a tamer right? Let Trixie do it. It's the least she can do. It will be different this time. This time, it will be just like Sleeping Handsome! He'll wake up and he'll b-"

"No." Luna curtly cut me off.

"Bu-but I'm not doing it for me! I'm doing it for him. Just let me do this one thing for him!" I begged, starting to trot over to Edgar's bed. My whole world flashed brightly and I found myself back where I was previously laying. The tile was warm, and a few spots were damp with the dark spots my tears left.

"Miss Lulamoon, we do not believe that would be wise. Not for us. Not for you. Not for Sir Edgar." Princess Luna walked over to me as I was still trying to get to my hooves. "How do you believe he thinks of thee?"

"What?" I paused as I turned to look at her.

"Wouldst he requite thy love? Would he have reciprocated were he awake right now?"

I opened my mouth, but closed it after a few moments. "...I don't know..." I admit, feeling myself sink back into the warm tile. "He said he liked my epi-...no, he never said he liked ponies or me that way..."

"We are sure you just want to help, but thou art not thinking clearly. Thou art acting manic. You, my sister, and my centurion, this whole town and it all seems to stem from the human, Edgar." Princess Luna said, her voice still placating in contrast to her eyes were narrowing in on me...judging me. "We do not believe that it is in either his best interest or thine to be anywhere near each other right now. Not until we receive an opinion of one who knows a bit more about love than either of us. Princess Cadenza and Prince Shining Armor of the Crystal Empire should be here tomorrow morning, according to their correspondence."

"Oh...Cadence and Shiny are coming. That's really good to hear." I looked back to Twilight and saw a small smile of relief starting to appear on Twilight's face. The first one since this whole debacle.

"Indeed. They were coming to support you, Twilight, as well as our nephew," Luna nodded, but she still didn't seem as happy about it. "And once they arrive, Cadance can help Trixie work out if her apparent love is real."

"IT IS!"

"...and if it is real and not just thou trying to make up for thine guilt, you may court him as before."

"But-"

"No."Luna interrupted with a command. "For now, thou must leave. We vow he shall awaken in the morrow, and you may speak with him then." From her tone, I knew there was no more arguing with Princess Luna. I had to leave him...again.

It's not fair... I'm just trying to help...

As I was wiping the tears and snot from my face, I felt another hoof on my back. I looked to my left I saw that Fluttershy was greeting me with a sad smile. She somehow snuck up on me and stroked my back to try conforming me. "Why are you trying to be nice to me...I don't get it."

Fluttershy just gave me a sympathetic look. "...Because you're crying."

"...so?"

"You've been crying since you got here...You've been worried about him ever since this morning..." Fluttershy said.

"You heard everything I did and said. I hurt him, and now I can't help him...Why are you being so nice to me? I'm a monster. A bitch. I don't deserve it... I don't deserve any of this." I could feel myself shaking.

"We think you're going through a lot right now." She said, her voice was soft but still comforting. "I think that you're scared and want to help him. That's why you were so upset about him. If it makes you feel better, I don't think you're a bad pony, Trixie."

"But...I'm not a good one either. How do you make something right when you keep making everything so wrong." I whimpered. Both Twilight and Fluttershy stroked their hooves across my mane and back as they did their best to comfort me.

"Well," Twilight paused for a bit and looked up to her own imaginary thought bubble. "You can start by trying? If I ask the maids to bring a bottle or two of Berry's Best Brandy to my room, would you be willing to stay the night with me for one more sleepover? I can try to call in a favor from Rarity and have Spike spend the night with her and Sweetie Bell. I can make it up for her since I may have a high-volume customer for her soon." Twilight nudged me as she tilted her head in Edgar's general direction. "We won't let anything bad happen to him now, right Luna?"

Princess Luna gave a curt nod before turning back to the balcony. She flared her wings and lit her horn and suddenly the world outside started to grow dark with stars lighting up the night. "He'll be fine, one way or another..."

"Yeah, and when I come back to my room, you can gush at me all night about what makes him so great. If you really feel that bad about it, you can start thinking of how to make things right. We can workshop it. I'll bring out a whiteboard and everything." Twilight started to nudge my side as she tried guiding me out the room.

"Myeah...okay." I relented and started to walk I began my walk of shame out of the room.

"Do you still remember where my room is?"

"Myeah..."

"I-I'll go with you and take you there. I'm not sure what else I can do for him right now, but if you need somepony to talk to..." Fluttershy's voice trailed off as she awkwardly rubbed her forelegs, but her wing did drape over me like a blanket. "I'm sorry, Trixie...I know you want to stay, but..."

"Trixie knows..." I didn't give any protest, and I felt low enough that even this meek pegasus could push me around if she wanted to. The two of us trotted down the hallway to Twilight's room. It was night time at this point and the only other ponies still awake were guards and the night custodians. "I should have stayed with you..." I weakly muttered, a small part of me hoping he heard me and knew how much I wanted to be with him right now...

***Twilight Sparkle's POV***

I waited a few moments after Trixie left the room and walked up to Luna.

"Something is definitely wrong with her." I said to Luna, who turned her head back to me with her ears perked up. "I wasn't positive until now, but i-it's like she downed an entire bottle of love poison and just stared at Edgar all night. It can't be love poison though, because we spent too much time away from him for it to be that. I'll have to leave sometime soon to make sure she is okay."

"We concur. She seems confused and her infatuation borders upon obsession. Try not to broach the subject too deeply until the arrival of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. We would like to discuss this matter with her as soon as she arrives." Luna turned her head back to the balcony and I followed her gaze. The moon was full and bright in the sky, and the stars were shining with a radiance that almost rivaled the moon. She was very passionate about making this particular night. I wonder if she was thinking about the same thing I was.

"Princess Luna, I can talk to you about things, right?" I asked the dark-blue alicorn. "I know you don't know me all that well, but I'm a bit worried about somepony."

"Do we know of this pony?" She asked as she turned back to me, her voice laced with curiosity.

"Mhmm, She's a good pony, but I think she's hiding some deep-seated pain. It's the only way I can rationalize what is going through her head." I looked at my own hooves, unable to look Luna in the eyes.

"Twilight, we have had enough mysteries and riddles for one day." Princess Luna stated. "Please speak plainly. If thou have concerns of Miss Lulamoon, make them known."

"No, it's not Trixie, though I am still worried about her." I shook my head before taking a moment steel my resolve for this.

"...Why did Princess Celestia threaten Edgar like that?" It took a bit of effort to get that sentence out. I never thought I would have to ask it, but I thought back to when we caught Celestia threatening him. She seemed so cruel, like she was possessed by the same thing that turned Luna into Nightmare Moon herself. It scared me seeing her like that, and I can't even imagine how Edgar felt.

Princess Luna lost her neutral expression and seemed almost sad, but before she could answer I saw her eyes narrow as her head quickly turned to the doorway as her horn started to glow.

"I'm not sorry for what I did, but I'm sorry you had to see that side of me, Twilight." I turned back to where the voice came from and I saw my Princess Celestia standing at the doorway. She looked tired and was gazing at us with puffy and solemn eyes. "You both deserve a better explanation from me..."

Author's Note

"...And then the goth vampire guard and the unicorn magician with the funny hat are going to fight over who gets to do sexy things to Edgar...Oh, and Celestia is there because I need a cliff hanger. Cliff hangers are cool."-Mrponyguy probably

I am thinking one or two more smaller chapters before Elden Ring's Shadow of the ErdTree DLC. Then, a small Hiatus until I finish it, then I start right back up(or at least work on it during my Elden ring breaks.) Sorry-not sorry.

As always, if you see something too obvious or stupid that I missed(Spelling mistakes, inconsistencies) , feel free to let me know.

Chapter Eleven: What lies beneath the lies - 2/2
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Eleven: What lies beneath the lies - 2/2

Author's note

So, there is one song in this chapter, but you will see it in four separate instances. You can just click it once if you choose and let it play softly in the background for the rest of the chapter.

I only have it in those separate spots to dictate when it is playing at that time.

If you can think of an easier way to handle that, let me know.

Princess Twilight Sparkle's POV

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As all three doors behind Princess Celestia closed, I heard a "POP" and felt Princess Luna teleport. I saw that she was now standing at Edgar's side.

"Was scaring him half-to-death not enough? Dost thou feel a job has been left unfinished?" Luna's tone was harsh and her eyes narrowed as she glared daggers at my teacher...The tension in the room feels awful.

"Be at ease, Luna. I did not come here to harm him as he lay unconscious and defenseless. You have my word." Celestia assured Luna as she walked over to Edgar's side, only to be met with a shield that Luna conjured up that very moment around the two of them.

"Dost thou truly believe thine word holds any worth now?" Luna's muffled tone was sharp from the inside of her bubble, despite it sounding like she was talking from the inside of a fishbowl. "Shall we remind thee of the "oath" given to us this morning. That "no harm shalt befall Edgar in his time here, no matter the circumstance"?"

"I know. I know..." Celestia's eyes closed with a grimace. When they opened again, they were calm. She didn't seem angry, but she seemed tired. Her eyes were looking right at Edgar before she rested her hoof on the shield. "I swear upon Equestria. Upon the life and memory of all the ponies I care about, and those I dearly miss. I swear on Moon Beam, Orange Justice, Straight Arrow, Rose Aurora, Mi Amore Cadenza, Sunset Shimmer, and even you, Twilight Sparkle. I swear on all of my students past and present that I will not dare to harm the human tonight. I vow it. But I need to speak with the both of you."

Luna's glare remained for a few more moments before she let out an irritated huff and turned away from her. "We suppose you would not invoke these names unless you meant it." The magical bubble dissipated. "We still will not be leaving this room, however. Whatever thou has to speak, speak it here."

Princess Celestia glanced at the comatose human laying on the bed. "Very well. May I?" She asked with a seemingly neutral voice. Luna's eyes narrowed, but she gave a nod. Celestia approached the bed where Edgar rested. She was warily eyed by Luna the entire time. "So, bitten by a changeling...?"

"Indeed, by Queen Telsona." Luna said in a short tone as she kept her eyes on Celestia.

"...You know that bite looks much too clean." She remarked, noticing the same thing that Luna did earlier. "This is not a battle wound."

"Our thoughts exactly. Our centurion believes he was almost raped...we believe you know the implications, Celestia." Luna spoke, her voice low and dark.

Celestia's wide eyes betrayed her internal monologue, and she turned away from Luna and toward the balcony attached to the side of Edgar's room as she tapped her hoof on the tile floor. "...He wasn't strong enough to fight off Queen Telsona out in the fields. She put him in a position where she could have ended him but chose not to. He still survived his encounter...possibly because she wants him alive for a reason we still are unaware of." Luna slowly nodded while wearing a frown during Celestia's entire hypothesis. "...It would have been nice if he bothered to mention this bite. Why was he only affected now? Changeling venom doesn't take that long to become active. Were our assumptions about the potency of a queen's venom wrong?"

"We believe he had been under the effects to a lesser extent since the bite. Though, as his stress grew, so did his adrenaline. It triggered a collapse like dominos or a house of cards. Trigged by terror, Celestia." Luna said, her eyes narrowing as she spoke. "The same centurion that came to this conclusion blamed Trixie Lulamoon for this fright, and it took much to bite our tongues and not cast the blame upon thee in front of the other ponies."

"Yes...Miss Lulamoon. I suspect she was closer to him than I had realized." Celestia's face fell and her ears splayed back as she turned her attention to the floor. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before looking back up to the both of us. "I would need to apologize to her as well, if she would have me. She is as much of a victim in this as anypony else."

"She's the one you need to apologize to??? What about the human, hmmm?" Luna waved her hoof in Edgar's direction. "Couldst not thy apology extend to him as well? Do you feel no remorse for what thou hast done?"

"...Of course. If it is as your centurion believes, then it is... most unfortunate what he endured.” Celestia’s voice softened, and her ears drooped as she stared at the floor. A shadow crossed her eyes before she looked back at Luna. “However, I will not apologize for my actions. He needed to be afraid of us... of me."

"How couldst thou not?" Luna said, her voice raising in anger. She narrowed her eyes at her as she stepped up to Celestia. "What would possess you to threaten him so?!? WHY?!?"

"Luna," I interrupted, trying to stop things from escalating. "Please, instead of arguing, let's just figure out how to help Edgar right now. According to Scarlett, we're on a time crunch."

I knew Luna was furious with Celestia, but I didn't want this argument to go any further than it already had. We had to work together to solve this problem. "Problem statement: He needs to lose his tumescence, and he needs a tamer. I'm still kind of new to this, but are Princesses allowed to hire... escorts? I don't really feel comfortable doing it, but I think we might want to try and give a professional a call. Sweet Heart has a bit of a reputation, but can probably make an emergency visit. That, or Princess Luna might also have night mares who might want to help with Edgar. Even Aloe and Lotus might be good options to consider if the rumors about their secret menu are tru-"

"No." Celestia interrupted. "That won't work. I forbade it when I spoke-"

"Threatened..." came an annoyed correction from Princess Luna, her voice still low.

"-with him this afternoon." Celestia continued, unfazed by Luna's interruption. "I forbade physical contact with anypony for the duration of his stay. Until we complete his path home, we need to prevent him from touching anypony."

"This would prevent the very thing that would be needed to help him, Tia!" Luna was now the one raising her voice as she turned away from her sister. "He needs a tamer! Did you come here simply to hinder us?"

"No Luna." Princess Celestia raised her voice to match Luna's tone only to dip back to its prior level. She shook her head. "I'm not trying to hinder you. If I can, I'll help you and him. It is my fault he was put in this position, so it is my responsibility to try and correct it. But it must be done without touching him."

"...So how do we help him then?" I asked. I didn't want to raise my voice like they've been doing to each other, and it felt outlandish that I was acting like like the arbiter in this conversation. "The only thing that isn't physical is magic, and we all know how that works on him."

Celestia's hoof went to her forehead near the base of her horn. She looked deep in thought. "I'm not sure yet, Twilight. I was not anticipating him being bitten. Please give me some time to think..." She sounded unsure, which made my ears drop a bit. It was rare to see her like this, and it was starting to worry me..."Do we have any cantaloupe or melons? Grapefruit, even?"

"Melons...?" I asked, my eyes going wide at the change in topic. "I'm not sure? When the changelings invaded, they destroyed a lot of produce in the farmers market that day. Cabbage Patch's insurance report said that all his cabbages were destroyed, and it likely happened with all the other market stands. Should I ask anyway?"

"No, that's quite alright Twilight. It was a silly idea anyway and likely a waste of time." Celestia said with a shake of her head. She seemed disappointed by something, but I couldn't imagine what. Neither Celestia or I got much time for brainstorming as this was interrupted when we both heard fabric rustling and a groan come from Edgar.

We both turned and saw that the towel covering Edgar had been tossed to the ground, revealing his penis standing proud ...against Luna's hoof pressing and prodding against it. Her hair lost it's ethereal flow and fell against her shoulders...

She's not actually going to...is she?!?

"He's quite lively and virile, isn't he?" Luna wrapped the crook of her hoof around his thingy and gave him a slow, firm stroke, causing a few drops of pre-ejaculate to start leaking out the tip. The motion also caused his whole body to twitch, and he groaned loudly and began panting. His hips gave a weak buck before settling back before the bed.

"P-p-pu-PRINCESS LUNA! What are you doing?!?"" I yelled with a monolithic blush heating up my face. I trotted in place nervously. I could feel my hooves tapping the ground faster and faster as the scene was starting to register in my mind. I know how its supposed to work, but this was too much to handle seeing in the moment!

"We were simply going to help him, Twilight. He seems sensitive enough, so this won't take long." She responded much too calmly. She started to slide her hoof down Edgar's penis and gently massaging the sack right below it. I could see her eyes narrow as she examined his genitals.

Celestia stood tall and broadened her shoulders. Her face was red, but appeared to be a shade of anger rather than embarrassment. "~Noooo. You are just about to remove your hoof, right?" Celestia's voice was calm, but there was clearly a storm brewing behind it to meet with Luna's own frown, which hadn't left her face this entire time. Her hoof drew a circle around Edgar's testicles, electing a moan from him before it slid back up the shaft and traced circles around the rounded tip.

"We said we are going to help him. Just because thou art scared of what's between his legs doesn't mean we are. You may have forbade him touching ponies, but you have not forbade us from touching him." She drew those circles again and again very slowly and very spitefully as she stared at Celestia, with Edgar's tip slowly being lubricated and shined by the growing amount of pre-cum leaking from him with sticky sounds permeating the room...it sounds too sticky.

"~LUUUNAAAA!" I squirmed and fidgeted as my heart was beating like mad. It was beating so hard, I felt it in my chest, throat and ears. I started sweating as I saw his penis throb in her grasp. I couldn't bear to look at this scene any longer. I never could have imagined Princess Luna of all ponies doing this!

...and so well?!? I'm learning TOO MUCH right now!!! About Princess Luna and about stallions.

"~STOoooOOP!~" I gave out a long drawn-out whine as my own hooves covered my blushing face, but my ears still perked toward the brushing noises and moans to keep listening to the lewd noises. I couldn't help it, and I still peeked through my hooves just a little to watch the scene unfolding.

"This isn't a debate, Luna. Stop touching the human." Celestia was using that same tone of authority from this morning, but it was completely wasted as she looked more like she was about to have an aneurysm from a mix of fear, worry and rage. She walked up and grabbed Luna's offending foreleg to stop her movements." Stop. Touching. The Human."

She pulled her hoof away from Edgar and yanked it out of Celestia's grasp. "He needs somepony to play the role of a tamer. If you won't allow anypony else can help with it, then we shall do it." Luna declared.

"No!" Celestia said almost too quickly, almost desperately. "No no NO! You foolish mare! I sent my letter in haste, but just because I did not address why you must avoid touching him does not make it an invitation to deliberately do so anyway. It's dangerous! Given enough time and contact, you start to lose yourself. You'll start to fall into a false love. You will become impulsive. No matter how tender or exquisite, that love is a lie!" Celestia explained as her voice grew in pitch and urgency. "Look at me, Luna. I don't want to see you relapse. I don't know if my heart could bear it."

I felt by blood run cold. "Just touching him could do that?" I thought to myself. The way Celestia said that made it sound like it was like being around a changeling who was actively trying to get into your heart. I felt myself blush and my mind wander to a scenario where Edgar would touch me...would I have felt the same way as Trixie? How long was Trixie touching him in the few days she knew him?

"...Thou art really going to discuss that now? In front of Twilight?" She looked like she was going to start yelling until a groan off to her side momentarily distracted her. Although Luna's hooves were off of him this time, Edgar groaned again. We saw that the human's fingers and toes curled, gripping into his sheets with white knuckles as he twisted the fabric into a wad and gripped it tightly. He must have subconsciously been frustrated at the lack of contact that Luna was previously giving him. "...We are going to wash our hoof. Honor thy word."

Princess Luna, whose hair was still hanging down from her head, started to walk off to the restroom. I heard the faucet turn on, and this was the only ambiance between the human noises Edgar occasionally made, and the silence between myself and my teacher, who was looking at Edgar in thought.

...No, there has got to be some prerequisites or rules to trigger this. I only bumped into him a few times, and it was barely more than a tap or brush. My nose was still kind of sore from earlier, but that punch was still over instantly. Maybe it has to do with the duration of contact. If Trixie really...rubbed herself or achieved female ejaculation with Edgar, that had to take a while to do, right?

"Ummm...Hypothetically speaking, how much time does it take to start to fall in love with him if he touches you." I asked nervously. "How much touching does it take?"

Princess Celestia's eyes looked at me in alarm. "...Why do you ask, Twilight?"

"J-just curious!" I stammered. "I mean, if he's going to be staying here, and we're supposed to be keeping an eye on him, then it's a good idea to know how dangerous his touch can be. Right?

As if she completely forgot what Princess Luna was doing moments ago, she focused all of her attention on me. "Twilight? Twilight, look at me. I need you to tell me right now if you are feeling anything for him. Anything at all!" She walked up to me and started to examine me. "He gave you that bloody nose earlier, didn't he?"

"Y-yeah, but it's not even broken or anything!" As I was telling her this, Celestia's horn lit up and I felt a soothing sensation from the inside of my nose. I let out a sigh of relief as I could feel my nose get warmer before returning to normal. It was a surefire sign that she helped heal any of the damaged blood vessels within. The thudding sensation in my right nostril was hardly anything to worry about, but now its non-existent. "It's already feeling better..." I mumbled. Even then, she didn't stop. Her magic washing over me was doing its best to groom me. I felt my hair and fur become unfrazzled as if a hair dryer ran across me, and I didn't feel gross and sweaty from all that running around I was doing earlier. "Thanks, Celestia."

Celestia's tone did not change, and she was starting to sound like my mom as she basically smothered me. "He still touched you."

"Yeah, but it wasn't his fault. I just surprised him earlier." The microsecond I finished my sentence, it was like Celestia was waiting with her own questions.

"Was there any other time he tried to touch you? Did you try hugging each other? Did he try to flirt with you?" She continued to grill me.

"No, not at all! I don't really like him that way. He was nice, but he never tried flirting...I mean, he did call me and Trixie pretty, but in retrospect I think he was just being facetious."

"Are you sure?" I nodded my head rapidly, and Celestia seemed to be easing up and relaxing. She looked back toward Edgar when suddenly her eyes darted back to me in concern. "...Does that hurt your feelings in any way? That he didn't seem to mean it?"

"...no?" I cocked my head to the side.

Celestia let out a relieved sigh and I could see the tension start to leave her body as her shoulders started to sag. "Oh, good...good." She looked back at Edgar and then back at me, her ears drooped a little. "I'm sorry, Twilight. You are very good at making new friends everywhere you go, and you're a caring pony. I didn't mean to accuse you of anything. I'm just concerned for you."

"If you are finished with this "bonding" time," Luna emerged from the bathroom breaking the brief calmness and reminding the room of her presence. Her hair was now floating once more as it it normally has. "We still have an issue at hand. The human is still in need of a tamer."

"No." Princess Celestia closed her eyes and her mouth shifted into a tight frown. "I won't be allowing this. You're the last pony who I would ever let touch this human."

"Because we are your little sister who keeps making poor choices? Is this another of our punishments, Tia?" Princess Luna glared at her elder sibling, her ears splayed back against her head as she stepped to the side to face Princess Celestia. She turned her attention back to me for a moment as I stood awkwardly in place. "Twilight, may you leave the room? We will need to talk privately for a while."

I glanced back and forth between the two of them, both of their eyes were trained on each other, and it was a tense silence between the both of them.

Celestia seemed like she was about to raise her voice at Luna, but she suddenly paused before she turned her attention to me. "...It will be alright, Twilight." Princess Celestia smiled, but I could feel the strain on her face as she turned back to Luna with her smile fading. "Luna, please understand that I'm trying to stop you from making a serious mistake. I'm not trying to upset you. I'm trying to help you!"

Princess Luna scoffed as she looked back at Princess Celestia with an expression of indignation and indignation. "It sounds as if thou believes we need your permission to assist him. Or are we not even allowed to speak with Sir Edgar?"

"Though I would urge caution, you are still free to do that if you wish. But we must forbid you from touching him, or have him touch you."

"Tia, we don't have a choice! He was bitten. By a Changeling Queen!" Princess Luna countered, and she was not yelling. She wasn't even talking loudly, but her voice carried with an almost deafening volume. She spoke slowly to her sister, but her tone was full of conviction. "Like all bites, it must be dealt with or he will suffer a serious blood clot. He was injured for Ponyville...Tis a paltry sacrifice, if one can even call it that."

"A paltry sacrifice, Luna?!" I could tell Celestia was frustrated, but she did not raise her voice as Princess Luna had. "I can not risk you falling down the same-" She seemed to catch herself before clearing her throat and lacing her pitch with irritation. "What exactly would you have me do about this, Luna? I understand that you want to help him with this bite. Howeve-"

"Nay. Unless thou has any better alternatives, thou must either lift thy ban on his aid or we shall take over his treatment. "We can't stand by and watch him suffer. It is cruel."

The white Alicorn seemed to lose her words for a moment. Her head tilted toward Edgar. Her gaze seemed to soften a bit, and a bit of that earlier regret she had when she came back into the room appeared as a faint frown. "It's not that I want to watch his condition worsen, it's just..." Celestia was silent for a time as she squeezed her eyes shut. Peaking out with one eye, she winced. "...How long has he been like this?"

"He has been in this state for nearly two or three hours now. We lost track of the time and should assume it is three." Princess Luna stated. Celestia didn't seem to be paying attention to Luna anymore. It was like she was zoning out. "We must be proactive, as we are unsure if he will awaken in time to handle it himself...Tia, are you listening?"

Princess Celestia's face appeared to slowly drop as she walked absentmindedly away from Edgar's bed and toward the balcony. While staring into the sky, her horn glowed and she surrounded herself in a magical bubble and suddenly she screamed. No noise emitted from it due to the shield she surrounded herself in, but it had so much force behind it that there appeared to be a visible shockwave reverberating within it and altering the air within, making it difficult to read her lips. Soon, the shield abated and Celestia's head hung low in defeat.

"...Sister?" Luna spoke up first. Celestia continued to not speak. Instead, she was just looking at Edgar with a conflicted frown. "Art thou going to lift his ban? We may be able to find some night mares as per my centurion's recommendations."

"...I won't lift it."

"Tiaaaaaa..." Luna started to raise her voice. Princess Celestia didn't turn back to look at us. She kept staring at Edgar, but she did raise a hoof toward us weakly as if to stop the impending protests. She looked like she was hanging by invisible strings with how slack her limbs looked.

"...I'll help him." Celestia's low hoarse voice said with some strain. Luna and myself did a double take at Princess Celestia. I was not sure I heard her correctly. "I'll be his tamer for tonight."

Nope, I definitely heard her right...WHAT?!?!

"Princess Celestia, you aren't serious, are you?" I asked, my tone raising an octave higher. I've always looked at her like a mother figure or an aunt, but hearing her talk about having sex with somepony or doing lewd things...that was something I was not prepared for. It just doesn't fit in my head that Celestia could...I don't really know. "You're saying you'll help him with his...problem? But you just warned us about his touch forcing you to fall in love!"

"I will be fine. I have found that his touch is influenced by the time and intimacy of it, so I will take no joy or time with him." Celestia clarified, her voice was strained with her body looking just as uncomfortable. "He just needs me to exhaust this venom's effects within him, right? Then this problem can be put to rest and we can put this nightmare behind us...He will ejaculate and his erection will be lost, but there will be no intimacy behind what I will do. Luna had already given me a head start, so..." She seemed to focus on the spire at Edgar's waist. Her nose scrunched as she shook her head. "I will try to make it as quick"

"No...Thou art clearly clearly tired, and it is past thine bedtime." Luna shook her head as if to shake herself out of her shock and turned back to Celestia. "Please retire and some get rest. Thou hath been sleeping poorly for the past few days."

Celestia shook her head, appearing to steel her resolve. "Luna, you just tried giving him a hoofy. We can't leave you alone with him, so I must help him." Celestia grimaced and walked to the edge of Edgar's bed. "I know what I'm doing. He is dangerous, but he is docile now...and I made a vow not to harm him. If he becomes injured because I scared him too badly, I would be breaking this vow, true? I do not like this anymore than you, but I will still do my best to look past him and help him for your sake."

Luna scoffed.

"Mere hours ago thou had threatened to kill him." Luna stated in a tone that dripped with disbelief and incredulity. "To scald him and crush him underneath thine hooves. Thou expect us to believe you to be amicable enough to pleasure him? Thou must be speaking in jest if you believe us moronic enough to leave you alone in a room with him after what you have said and done, vow or no."

Princess Celestia was not happy to be called out, but she seemed to expect this reaction. She walked back over to her little sister with a neutral expression. "He said some things that brought up bad memories. I did threaten him...and I was prepared to carry them out should he ever cross that line, but I admit that I let my emotions get the better of me. My hopes were that I emasculated him badly enough that he would never attempt to cross those lines, but it seems now that I must cross the same line that I drew for him. I have nopony but myself to blame for my actions, I will swear to you both that my intentions to bring harm was and still is a last resort. This is only if I believe it is beyond a shadow of a doubt that he intends to harm or manipulate any of you."

"...So, this is your apology then, is it? For what thou has said to him?" Princess Luna stated. It didn't seem like it was much of a question at all as much as it was a statement of fact. "All the more reason that you should be prevented from touching him if you are feeling forced into this. We shall resolve without thee somehow."

Panic briefly crossed Princess Celestia's face, but she did not let it stay. "What do you want from me, Luna? I'm trying to make things right. This is a compromise for his safety, for yours and Twilight's. You don't have to tell him that it was me, and you-" Princess Celestia's breath hitched in the back of her throat as she squeezed her eyes shut. After a deep breath she looked back at Luna. "...You can watch and make sure I do not harm him. Once it is done, you can say you contracted an anonymous escort to take care of it."

Luna herself found herself once more shocked with her jaw racing my own in hitting the floor.

This was not at all how I thought this conversation would go, especially all the things she's suggesting she do. This is going to get even more awkward than I could have possibly imagined. I felt a cold shiver run down my back. Celestia looks so out of her element right now. "Celestia, I'm still having a hard time even imagining you doing this. You would actually help him?"

Her head whipped toward me. "Yes! If that is what it takes to make sure you both stay safe and that you do not touch him, then a million times yes!" Princess Celestia exclaimed. I saw a spark of desperation in her eyes, as she tried to sound resolute. Her wings fanned out, but they trembled. "I'll do what has to be done."

Princess Luna soon regained her composure. "...If he is anything like other bite victims, it will take more than one to get it entirely out of his system. What if it he gets another erection immediately after that lasts longer, or one that springs up later in the night?" Princess Luna asked, though a bit more calmly. This time, Luna didn't sound antagonistic in the slightest, but she did not let go of her skepticism. She seemed just as unsure of this situation as Princess Celestia was, but for different reasons.

“He is still unconscious, wake me,” Celestia said, moving purposefully toward the bed. "I'll take care of him as many times as he needs until he wakes up. Then, he is on his own."

"...And there is no way you would consider a volunteer?" Luna inquired. Celestia's silence was her answer. It was clear she wasn't going to budge either. Luna seemed to be giving this situation some thought before turning back to me. "...Twilight, leave if thou must. We shall remain while Celestia acts as his tamer, and you may not wish to be here if thou are skittish about these sorts of things."

"What? NO! Celestia, I can't let you go through with this." I trotted up and wrapped my hooves around her back leg a tight hug, trying to stop her from getting closer to him. I felt myself get dragged across the floor as she moved closer to him. "I want to help Edgar, but I know you don't like him that way at all. You don't want this. Just let Princess Luna help him like she wanted to...I'll do it if you let me!"

"I know, and it's why I have to Twilight. I want you safe, am I not clear?" Celestia separated my hooves from her leg and sat me down as she turned to me. "We may sometimes wish that some things have never had to happen, or that our duties may become easier in time. But fate has a funny way of playing pranks upon us. We can't change our circumstances, but we can control how we react to them and make the best of them. I know that I made many mistakes today, but believe in me when I say that I am choosing this Twilight. I don't want you to think for a moment that I would prefer an alternative where either of you went through with this." Celestia hugged me back...tightly. "Now I want you to leave. If Luna is okay with staying, but I would prefer that you not see me when I do this."

Celestia...I squeezed my eyes shut. I felt like she was giving me an impossible task to do...but she still made her intentions known. She didn't seem to want to hurt him...

"No. I'll wanna stay with you. You don't have to go through this alone." I pleaded with her, trying to hold back my tears. "Maybe there's some other way I can help? Maybe we can wait just a little while longer? Maybe I can still find those melons you were asking for? Maybe-"

"Look at me, Twilight..." I heard her croak out. It sounded like her voice was starting to break. "...You don't have to stay and prove yourself to me. I'm already so proud of you. I always have been... but there are some things even you can't fix..." I turned to her and I could see the tears in her eyes. I nodded slowly and stood up. I hugged Princess Celestia tightly once more, and she squeezed back as her hooves held me close. After a long moment, I separated from her. "Please...leave."

I didn't know what to say. Celestia doesn't cry, and it looked so alien for her. But even more, I knew there was nothing I could do for her that would make her stop. It's not fair.

She's just one more pony I couldn't help...

"She may not have to leave, Tia...Look." Luna's voice betrayed some sort of foal-like amazement or wonder as it broke the silence of our hug. She pointed toward Edgar and...His erection was losing its size. In fact, it appeared to be shrinking. It still appeared to be engorged with blood, but it was only semi-erect at this point and shrinking rapidly.

'It's...becoming flaccid? I asked, wiping my eyes to clear the tears and make sure I was seeing what everypony else was.

However emotional I was feeling, I was completely knocked out of this mood by this random event. The princesses seemed confused too, as they watched it jump up a bit, but slowly lose its size.

"So Telsona's venom is...no longer effecting him?" Luna asked, trying to understand what is happening. "Is his race so vastly different from ours that it was never an issue?"

"We don't that know for sure, Luna." I explained. "He could still be affected by it, but maybe it's starting to burn off naturally? Or maybe he won't need to take care of it until after he wakes up?"

Luna's frown started to disappear as she perked up. "Perhaps he could hear crying mares somewhere in his dreamworld, and the mood had been ruined for him." Luna teased, a small smile of her own starting to appear on her face. Though the playful tease sounded sounded like an mean-spirited jab from her sister, Princess Celestia payed it no mind as she lightly chuckled and wiped her eyes. She looked much much happier than a few moments ago. "We notice Edgar had been shivering. If he truly requires his clothes due to his lack of fur, perhaps he is simply cold and that was all it needed to calm it." Princess Luna used her magic to take a blanket and lay it across the human's body. "He also has more sweat than we anticipated coming from his brow. Is he expelling it somehow?"

"No...I think his body had been cooling itself. We didn't consider cooling him because it wouldn't work for a stallions. They have coats of fur, after all, but even having them take a dip in an ice bath didn't work for them." As I analyzed out of pure habit and curiosity, but this did not last long as a hopeful tone rang out of my mouth. "Edgar's still becoming flaccid though...This means Celestia doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to, right?"

"Whatever it may be, whether it be his lack of fur or his body fighting the venom for the entire time until earlier today..." Princess Celestia rationalized, almost relieved that she doesn't have go through with it. "That has to be it, and its being broken down by his immune system. Either this, or it truly was my presence. Luckily, nopony has to do a thing now that his erection has abated. He can have as many foals as he would like when he returns to his home, and neither of us have to do anything." A collective sigh of relief was shared by all three of us. "And should we wake up and still feel the effects, we will leave him a bucket, some "reading material", and give him some privacy to take care of it himself. If you truly suspect that it was my presence that killed his stiffy, then I will come in and talk about my day and kill it again if he hasn't woken up. Shrink little one, shrink..." She amusingly commanded of the deflating tent Edgar made under the blanket before laughing out loud again. She looked genuinely happy about this outcome, as did everypony else in the room.

Edgar was fine and we weren't under any time crunch to think of a solution for him. He didn't need a tamer, and neither Celestia, Luna, or anypony else needs to be put in an uncomfortable spot. It was the best of all worlds! I gave the human a look of relief, and I noticed that Princess Luna did the same. She looked relieved too, as if something very heavy was lifted from her back. It was like a Hearth's Warming miracle! We stayed in the afterglow a good while longer relishing the good luck we had.

"...I can't believe I just used 'little one' and 'stiffy' in the same breath." Celestia said between laughs, causing her chuckles to grow harder and louder.

"Sister, that is quite unbecoming." Luna's scolding had no bite to it and she was giggling a bit herself. Even Luna was starting to have a lighter mood despite the whole situation moments before. "Sir Edgar would not appreciate you calling his penis as such."

"No no, I'm sorry...it's just been a while since I laughed like this." Princess Celestia was wiping away a mock tear with her hoof as her chuckles started to die down.

Seeing them laugh with each other again... this would have been a great way to end the night. I felt guilty that I couldn't let the night end like this...I wanted Celestia's smile to last a little longer, but I had to ask her. Before I lost my nerves again, I had to know...

"...Celestia, I-...about the things you said to Edgar earlier..."

Princess Celestia froze. Her body went completely still and the room's warmth felt like it had been sucked out into a void. Even Luna's smile started to falter.

"...Why do you hate him?" I asked. "He was really nice. He saved Ponyville without even knowing our names."

There was a pause at first.

She turned to Edgar, as if to make sure he was still sleeping.

Then finally a sigh came as Celestia's smile faded. "I don't hate him, per say. I think I hate what he is...A human." She turned to face me. "Do you still trust me, Twilight?"

"What?" I asked. She paused for a moment. She looked like she was searching for the right words as her ears sagged and she sighed again.

"You're asking about him...why I acted the way I did, yes? Do you still trust me?" I could feel the seriousness behind that question and my mind reeled from it. "After what you saw me do earlier today, and what I tried doing for Edgar moments ago. Do you trust that what I do is for the right reasons? For Equestria?" She asked, intently staring into my eyes as if they would tell her my answer. "For my friends and family? For you, Luna?" She asked, as she turned back to the Night-blue Alicorn. Luna was looking off to the side as her face turned down toward the floor silently, but intently listening. Sensing no answer from Luna, Celestia turned back to me...much quicker than I was able come up with an answer.

"I want to, but..." I didn't know what to say. She's always been somepony I could turn to and trust. Somepony I could ask for advice, but I saw sides of my teacher that I never had before. I don't know about how I feel about them right now...She's always pushed me to be the best version of myself. To do better, to be more understanding and compassionate toward those who have wronged me or my friends. However, I have never seen her lose her temper like she did today. It was so far beyond what I had expected of her. It was a far cry from the pony I knew her as...it honestly scared me a little.

Celestia's head dipped to the ground. She slowly nodded at me in understanding. "That's fair." Princess Celestia was silent for a time. If she was hurt by this, there was little indication apart from the pause. After a deep exhale. "I've kept things from the both of you to ensure that you do not live in fear of things that once were. This is difficult for me to speak about, but you have been left in the dark for longer than acceptable. Brace yourself, this may be complicated." She took a moment to steady herself.

"I am sure by now you have come to the conclusion that Edgar may not have been the only human to have arrived in Equestria, and that we have encountered them before. Possibly from my actions, rash as they may appear. Possibly from the schematics I sent you for his containment and their age. You would be correct in this assumption..." Celestia looked out toward the balcony of Edgar's room. "There have been some stories of humans arriving in Equestria in days of old. Back in a simpler time where Equestria was once Ponyland . Star Swirl mentioned a story of three human siblings in passing who have become great friends with the ponies back then."

Princess Luna paused with a strange expression on her face. Her eyes widened upon realization. "...The Who Manes?"

"Yes Luna, the "Who Manes"." That's what we used to call them back when we were younger. Back when we were still having trouble pronouncing names. Princess "Woona" always had a hard time pronouncing "L's" for the longest time and loved using "W" instead." Princess Luna stuck her tongue out at Celestia, who seemed to be fondly reminiscing about their youth."...And now she is one of the most articulate ponies in Equestria, if a bit antiquated. Anyway, these were the stories of the ponies of "Dream Valley", and their friends across the rainbow, Meee-gan, Daniel, and Molly.

"Megan." Luna interrupted, prompting Celestia to look at her with a confused stare. Luna gave a cheeky smile as she corrected her elder sister. "The name of the eldest sibling was Megan."

Princess Celestia looked at her with a bemused expression. "You still remember that?"

"Look who's having trouble with pronunciation now." Luna said with a hint of nostalgia. "I had forgotten this story, but I do remember us arguing about which name was the correct one."

"It was "Megan", wasn't it?" Celestia gave a small, but warm smile. "Those arguments were my favorite pastime."

Celestia took a few moments before she shook herself out of her nostalgia.

"As I was saying, these stories served as progenitors of the first friendship lessons, and the heroic deeds these young siblings inspired us. Megan, the eldest sibling, and the wielder of the "Rainbow of light", helped ponies battle Tirac, the lord of Midnight castle." Celestia explained, telling it like a legend from times long past. "While they were simply stories at the time, but Star Swirl still credited the lessons of friendship within their stories to his inspiration as to why he choose to befriend Tirek's brother, Scorpan, all those years ago."

"Wait a minute...they helped us with Tirek?" I asked in surprise.

Celestia shook her head.

"No Twilight, but I can see your confusion." Princess Celestia explained. "The names may be similar, but Tirek and Tirac are separate individuals, even though they share similar features, namely their horns and stature. Tirac is even described to be the same blood-red color as Tirek. You and your friends defeated "Tea-Wreck" a month back and saved Equestria. The story that Star Swirl used to tell is about "Tear-Ack", the Lord of Midnight Castle."

"You said they used a "Rainbow of light" to beat him? That sounds a lot like what the Elements of Harmony do when they're used. They create a beam of Harmony though, and the rainbow they create is simply what is in our visible spectrum." I speculated. I'm honestly surprised I missed this story, and fascinated by its contents now. I could have sworn I read every book in the Canterlot library before I was sent to Ponyville. How have I not heard of this story? "There are a lot of things in these stories that sound familiar."

"That is a mystery that eluded us for many years...there was even a purple baby dragon that played an important role in the story. Can you guess his name?" Celestia asked, knowing that we both knew the answer.

"...No way." I could barely believe my ears. "Spike?"

Celestia nodded. "Most auspicious, is it not? I thought so as well when I heard what name you chose for him. I have a theory that this story was instead a prophecy that Star Swirl had encoded in his story to guide us into helping you, Twilight. We never did break this cipher of his before Tirek's return, but perhaps it was not needed with the many lessons in friendship you and your friends all had learned on your own. Instead of befriending "Scorpan", it was the friendship you have built with everypony and it's culmination with Discord's redemption that lead to Tirek's downfall and capture."

"And now a human, like the ones who helped us in this story came, right? But what does this have to do with Edgar?" I asked, trying to understand the connections. "He hasn't hurt anypony."

"Despite these stories, there has been no evidence of humans actually existing at one point in time...Until a short time after Luna's banishment. One day, a student of mine wrote about a human who made her way into Equestria. An old mare who was immune to magic much like Edgar. Because of what I heard about them in these stories, I let my foalish excitement get my hopes up. I had them dashed when I found out that she had been there for a month doing horrible things to my little ponies. Her smile was bright and her words were honeyed, and she was a true demon..." Celestia's voice went low and crept to a whisper. "I will now be referring to her as the "Hag". I don't want to dignify her name. She was a master manipulator and was able to convince ponies she met to perform terrible acts to their friends. All for her own promises of power, of which she could not truly bestow. I have strong reason to believe it was the Hag's touch that influenced them, and in the span of one month I suspect she was here, she was solely responsible for a bloodbath that haunts me to this day..."

"I was forced to kill her...but I hate that she made me enjoy it. I lost too much that day. A piece of myself, many of my friends at the hooves of my other friends she turned against us. I think she believes she had won, and though her influence faded from their minds, never did the aftermath of what she forced my ponies to do. They were broken for the rest of their lives from what they had done to the ones they had loved. I tried helping my ponies forget, but her grasp ran deep in their minds and mine. Because of this, I struck her true name and all mention of humans all records. For a time, it seemed like they only revenge I could take on her for what she did while she was here." Celestia paused for a bit as if to collect her thoughts. "Her entire reasoning for being the monster she was is to never be forgotten. She sought immortality of a sort, and when she was denied it, she used a more unorthodox way to get it. In a way, she got her wish, and I alone choose to remember her. I want to forget, but I never wish to see a repeat of the past."

Luna finally spoke up.

"And dost thou think this context wouldn't have been better to mention earlier? Before we spoke with Edgar?" Luna asked annoyedly.

"This was of my own weakness. She made me lose one of my students, Moon Beam...I don't like remembering it." I felt a sick feeling in my stomach since we both saw a tear drop fall from her face and onto the floor. Luna's own face softened when she saw the state Celestia was in.

I took hold of her hoof. "Celestia, I can't begin to understand what you might have gone through, but Edgar hasn't done anything wrong yet, has he? We can be careful around him, but I don't understand what Edgar has to do with it. I don't want to force you to explain yourself further unless you are truly ready to talk about it, but this hag can't represent all humans, right? So what if Edgar's a human. Hasn't he proven himself by saving Ponyville? He is still innocent until he proves himself evil, right?"

"I wanted to believe that. I still do so much, but I just keep getting disappointed. The Hag was not the only human to find their way into Equestria. In time, more humans slowly trickled in throughout the centuries. From my experience, there was never more than one and they were few and far in between. The very next human that came was a wounded male from the Everfree, but he was more of an it. Ritualistic Blue etchings adorned his skin and the skin of a brown bear that he wore upon his back. He stumbled to our castle gate wounded with arrows sticking out of him." Celestia was not looking at either of us and just viewed straight, as if contemplating a memory we didn't have.

"We were foolish and thought it needed help. I went down to meet it with our royal guards, but the human was frothing at the mouth in rage. There was no communicating with it, and it kept repeating the same screech over and over again, "Rom-Han-Ach". What it held was too big to be called a sword. Massive, thick, heavy, battered, and far too rough. Indeed, it was more like a heap of raw iron at that point... but it was propping itself and using it like a crutch. I felt pity for it, and hesitated upon seeing the blood leak from it's wounds. Before I realized what was happening, it killed six of my ponies before it was put it down with considerable effort...at the cost of another student of mine who became captain of the guard a year before, Orange Justice. He barely survived his encounter, but became so consumed with fear that his heart could not take it anymore. He passed away in his sleep from a heart attack." Celestia stopped and looked down in her hooves. I squeezed her hoof as she tried to steel herself, but her lip was trembling. "I wish that was the end of it all, but as I said, more humans came eventually. They just keep coming the moment I let my guard down."

"Tia, sister." Luna stepped up. She trotted beside Celestia and rested her hoof on Celestia's shoulder. "We see that you have had a most traumatic past in our absence. It pains us greatly to see thee relive it, but you must believe us. That was then, and this is now. Thou dost not know him and is prejudiced against his kind. Please do not condemn this human for his kindred. This human has done us no wrongs."

Celestia looked like she was about to speak, but seemed to drop whatever was on her mind."...I'm so tired of giving them chances. It has always ended in disappointment." She gave Luna a tired smile.

"Celestia, I still don't understand. If you are so concerned about Edgar's touch, then why put yourself at risk? How would you know you wouldn't be influenced by him later?" I asked her, my voice full of concern. It still doesn't make any sense to me. She's revealing so much right now, but I am finding myself with even more questions than before.

"...I killed a Human I let myself fall in love with once before. One that I gave a chance to..." I could feel the air get sucked out of the room and the world went silent as I heard her say this. "I can do it again if I had to. I would prefer it never comes to that...but fate has a way of working against us."

"Celestia, you never told us this..." I said softly, my voice barely above a whisper. Celestia paid no mind to our reactions to her confession and sighed, staying quiet. As she confessed these moments in her past, I saw that a weight was being lifted from her shoulders.

"It is because of my experiences that I am so wary of him. Because of what you now know of a human's touch, I have a very important assignment for you Twilight." She looked me straight in the eyes. I could feel her intense gaze on me. It wasn't scrutinizing me, but rather, I was feeling the weight of the trust she was placing on me.

"I have strong suspicions to believe now that Edgar has been in frequent physical contact with ponies in the short time he has been in Equestria, more than my sister simply holding his hands. I suspect the pony he had the most physical contact with so far is Mrs. Lulamoon, who had tried to shove me in front of the royal guard earlier today. Do you concur?" I nodded, thinking back to her breakdown earlier tonight. "She is not in trouble, as she is practically drunk on her feelings. We also saw that one of Luna's centurions attempted to perform C.P.R on Edgar. Though not intentional, this action alone is more "intimate" than most contact and could have affected her. We have two ponies so far. Do you know of anypony else?"

"Fluttershy had to touch him a bit to examine him, and she did look really concerned and guilty that she missed the bite mark. She is always like that though, so she didn't seem different." I stated.

"We had Honest Applejack and Noble Edgar shake hooves to make up for a dispute they had. Young Apple Bloom also showed little fear of Edgar, going so far as to hug him when he revealed her as his ward." Princess Luna was pacing now. She was deep in thought and seemed to be starting to get into Celestia's wave length.

"We will need to track which ponies were in contact and for how long. We also need to pay careful attention of changes in their personality and feelings. For a time, they may be confused about their feelings, and it may cause friendship problems in the near future." Celestia stated. She was thinking of everything that could go wrong, and how we would handle it.

Princess Luna spoke up. "If he doesn't already know, we should tell him the truth about his touch."

"No, that is a terrible idea!" Princess Celestia's eyes were wide with shock as she looked at her sister in disbelief. "He will try to use it to his advantage!

"Celestia, he cannot remain walking on eggshells, lest your threats toward him turn prophetic." Luna warned, her tone firm and resolute. "We believe this may be a solution that benefits everypony in the long run. At the very least we would know that he knows, and he would know that we know what his touch can do."

"And I wouldn't want a being that has the power to exert his will and dominate us to know that he can with enough guile." Celestia appeared to be deep in thought, and I could almost feel her anxiety radiating from her. I could tell that she was being truthful with how she feels, but the very thought of her being this nervous because of him scared me. She turned back to me with a soft expression, as if seeking guidance from me. "Twilight, what do you think we should do?"

"What? Why are you asking me???" I stuttered in surprise, freezing on the spot. I felt like all of these sudden twists and turns were starting to confuse me, and my mind was spinning. Celestia never hesitated on any decisions she made. However, it seemed that this time, she was seeking my advice more than anything.

"You both have followed my instructions to the letter the entire day up to this point, and we saw how that turned out." Celestia turned toward the sleeping human. "However, I know first hoof what he could bring upon us. I am asking you because myself and Luna are at an impasse, and because I trust you. I can not trust myself to be fair in this decision. I cannot trust him either, but I will trust in your decision."

...How could I choose? Princess Luna's explaination may seem practical and reasonable, but Princess Celestia's warnings and reservations seem so real... It felt like I was being asked to betray one of my friends in favor of another.

Celestia has bad memories of humans, but none of them are of the one laying in that bed right now, right? He hasn't even really had a chance to defend himself...Maybe that's all he needs.

"I want to trust you too...I know I still do, but I want you to trust me and Princess Luna too. I think that we should tell him." Princess Celestia listened carefully. Her face betrayed little emotion. "I don't want him to be afraid of us. We need to at least talk to him and let him know why we are so wary of him. If we can't even talk to him, the only thing left for us to do is...is fight with each other! I don't want to do that. I want my friends to be safe, but I don't to stop him from making friends. I don't want to not be his friend either. That goes against everything I believe and learned. We can't isolate him and make him think he is all alone with nopony on his side. If he thinks that, he might end up thinking it is him versus all of Equestria."

I tried to plead my case as best as I could. With any luck, I might be able to say the twenty minute speech I had lined up earlier this morning. "If he has friends, and we show him the magic of friendship, he will have ponies to confide in and talk to him. We can make sure he isn't the monster you are afraid he'll be."

Princess Celestia seemed to almost be in meditation as she listen to me, appearing deep in thought. I could see the internal struggle that was going on inside her, and I could see the conflict on her face.

"Celestia?" I called to her.

It was a short moment later before she opened her eyes again. Her gaze was gentle as well as her simile. "It's nothing Twilight. I'm just...I'm proud to call you my student. You are brave and wise beyond your years, and you are already forming into a better ruler than I was at your age...that I had shown myself to be even now. It is an encouraging thought.

"Does this mean you will give him a chance?" I asked hopefully.

"No." She answered bluntly, her smile disappearing with mine following. "I said once before that I will not trust him. You need at least one pony to not trust any action he takes...but I will trust you. I only ask that you do not regret this decision."

"We doth suppose that this is the best we can agree to, isn't it?" Luna asked, clearing the air between the three of us. All three of us nodded to each other in unison, finally reaching consensus as Celestia broke the silence once more.

"We still have a matter of addressing the specifics, but this can wait until tomorrow morning when the rest of the Royal family arrives. Hopefully, Professor Lyra Heartstrings and the Good Doctor may be ready to give their evaluations of Edgar's effects as well, now that there is a living human for them to examine. With any luck, they may be of assistance."

I really should have paid more attention when Lyra tried showing off that rough draft of the romance story she was writing in her spare time. We mainly wanted to get her and her herd mate's input on the Melody Magic surfacing more frequently around here, but I think it's safe to say that Edgar has a hand in it. However, that rough draft she started writing may prove a bit more useful to me. I may need to borrow it to see if there is any reference material or similarities between Edgar and the mysterious "Handy-mane" that she wrote about.

"Well...if that's everything, I think I should go check on Trixie and Fluttershy, at least to make sure they are doing okay. Trixie's going through a rough time right now, but if you need me for anything, I'll be up for a little while longer." Twilight said. "Celestia, you can talk to me about these things. Please don't keep us in the dark like that, not when you have things to get off your chest." Celestia nodded absently as she appeared to gaze onward. She looked deep in though as she stared off into the distance.

"We shall stay and keep watch over the human then." Luna announced, now resting on the couch at Edgar's bedside.

"Good night Princess Luna, and goodnight Princess Celestia." I walked up to her and hugged my teacher's foreleg one last time before trotting off and leaving the room. I stopped briefly and turned to give one last wave. Both princesses followed suit with my gesture, and I shut the door behind me, leaving the two Princesses and the human alone.

There was a brief thought in the back of my mind that they might start arguing again, but I think now that we had a chance to talk this through, we have better understanding and trust with each other again.

I think the worst is behind us now...

"Third-person POV" Edgar's Room

As both Alicorns watched the purple Alicorn leave the room, Princess Luna paused for a brief respite...then got up from her spot on the couch and stood beside her sister.

"...We are sorry for screaming at thee earlier, sister, and for saying such awful things. We were...It was unbecoming of the both of us, and thou must believe me when I say it pains us greatly." She apologized, reaching over Celestia's back her with a wing. Princess Celestia felt her sister pull her into a hug, and though initially stiffen in surprise at first, she returned the gesture as she relaxed into it. "We still believe thou had overreacted and treated him quite unfairly, but we can not say for certain if we could be restrained if we had walked in thine past hoof prints."

"Thank you, Luna...and I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you earlier when you confronted me." Celestia's voice was weak and tired from the nights she stayed up since she first received Twilight's letters. Luna and Twilight's support revitalized her as her smile started to grow, and she held her sister tightly in her embrace. She was silent for a time, and merely enjoying her sister's warmth. "You care Luna...sometimes too much, but I would take this over you not caring enough any day of the week. I am sorry for bringing up your past like that...I still can't help but worry about you. I shall stay here with you for now. At least until he wakes up."

"No, sister. Having you in the same room if he wakes up may not be the best idea. Besides, thou needs thine rest."

"And you don't?" Celestia countered a raised eyebrow. "We've both been sleeping poorly these past few days. You need your rest too."

"Art we not a princess of the night, Tia? Our duty is not to sleep, but rather to watch over everypony in Equestria as they do so."

"I don't want to leave that human alone, and certainly not alone with you. Having a human here...it's a temptation." Celestia's voice went low. "I don't want you to fall down that same path you once did. The things that had you spiral down all those centuries ago..."

Luna's eyes went wide, as if she had been slapped. She stepped away from Celestia, and stared at her sister. "Art thou suggesting that we would take advantage of him? Of somepony who is under our protection? If you are concern of "intimacy", our contact was purely platonic. There was no love involved even if we did show concern. Retire to thine chambers and sleep, Sister." The heavy doors started to slide open, only for it to slam shut once more as Celestia's magic overtook Luna's own magical glow.

"No, Luna. I am suggesting the inverse. That he would take advantage of "you". Once we both get a good night's sleep, we can help Twilight draft a plan for him with the help of our our nieces and nephews. Possibly having a guard or two in the room, as well as another pony in the room at any given time, but he can't be left alone with anypony, including you. You also can not be simply left with another guard. You could simply order them to leave, so it would need to be with another pony that could cancel out your order, and vice versa." Celestia turned to Luna with a serious expression on her face. "It's not you, but rather the influence he may already have on you that I don't trust."

"And thou would be more trustworthy to be left alone with him?"

"If you do not trust me with him, that is fine. We can keep each other in check."

Luna shook her head. "Celestia, we need to be able to have faith in each other...If you are correct about his touch, then we believe we have seen first hoof what it can do, and we shall be mindful of this...domination as you call it. We will be careful as the night progresses. We know thou art tired and weary. Thou has worked hard for Equestria, but thou need not to carry the weight of the world by thyself." Princess Luna said, putting a hoof on Princess Celestia's shoulder as she continued to speak. The doors slowly slid open one last time as she nudged her sister along.

"He fell unconscious mid-afternoon. If, by chance, his body is truly fighting the venom, he may wake up in the middle of our night. Rather than have Edgar perform a desperate escape attempt like earlier upon seeing you or anypony else, we find it best that we stay awake a little longer and explain the situation to him. We feel as if we had built somewhat of a rapport with him, and he will understand our concerns and keep his hands to himself. We are sure of it..."

Celestia looked back at the sleeping human. As Edgar gave out a small shiver, she turned back to her sister and hugged her one last time, as tightly as she could while Luna reciprocated. "I still don't trust him. I can't trust him...but as I promised to trust Twilight, I will now trust you. Please be careful, Luna."

"We will be. Besides, our sleep schedule has been ruined after these past couple of days. We intend to mend it by staying up tonight, and sleeping tomorrow at least until the afternoon. For now, it is best that thine rest is uninterrupted. The rest of the royal family is coming, and we have a day of much import coming tomorrow. Our sister must be at her prime. We shall sleep tomorrow."

Celestia gave a tired laugh and relinquished her hug. "I can relate to the ruined sleep schedule...I'm scared of what tomorrow may bring... When a Human is in Equestria, these stories have never ended happily from my experience..." Celestia said, walking out of the human's room, finally leaving Princess Luna alone.

Luna watched her sister leave and after waiting a few minutes to see if she would come back, gave a sigh of relief. It was a tense few hours between them. Her sister's reaction was understandable, but still an overreaction in her eyes.

Luna grabbed a left-over parchment and a quill that Twilight had left over in Edgar's room and started to jot down a list of items that nopony would raise questions about.

Coffee grounds

Crystal Wine Glasses

Bananas

Espresso cups

Coffee pot & filters

Pure Water

Sugar

Cinnamon sticks

Cinnamon dust

Whipped cream

Taper candles

Radiant Rise crème liquor

If missing, Shadow Swirl Sambuca - Black Label

→If missing, some form of rum.

Some other fruit aside from Bananas

Once she was satisfied with the list, she dried the ink and rolled it up into a scroll. She took a deep breath and opened the doors with her magic. The guards outside were standing at attention as she turned to address them.

"According to the schedule this morning, Tidy Trot should be working the night shift. When she passes by this door in the next few minutes, please provide this scroll and have her procure the products in this parchment back to us immediately." She ordered. Upon receiving a salute of affirm the command, she turned back and shut the doors once again. In truth, gears and cogs started turning in her head the moment she saw Edgar in that field...and spun faster upon seeing how her sister viewed Edgar.

Luna turned the couch to face the balcony and the moon slowly rising overhead before resting upon it once more. She liked to stare and contemplate it sometimes, though this time, she has ambiance of a mumbling human in the background. There are slurs and grumbles in his speech, but nothing that Luna could discern quite yet. However, his dreams do seem vivid.

"...Perhaps whilst we wait, we should take this time to allow any doubts to surface." She thought to herself. There is a clear cut difference between helping the human with an actual guaranteed issue like his bite was and helping him with something that could happen. "One would argue that this may not be...acceptable. Even when doing the right thing, should it be done for the wrong reasons? Should we even be the ones to do this...?"

Fluttershy's cottage. Third-Person POV A short time later

Discord found him quite perturbed as he sat quietly on a reading chair and thought to himself. If you had asked an eccentric draconequus like Discord if he would have saw himself doing positively nothing after already spending all those years turned to stone, he may have laughed in your face and sent you to Detrot for giggles. This however, was a new tradition that he had learned to enjoy. Nothing Night was a night where you spent your time doing absolutely nothing with somepony. It was quite cozy, and even if his dear Fluttershy adored the Chaos Lord's fun and unpredictable nature, there was something they both enjoyed about their time together doing nothing. Doing it alongside somepony made the seemingly dull activity...not so bad.

However, he wasn't doing something nor nothing with anypony. Rather, he was relegated to doing nothing with nopony in a brightly lit cottage as he waited for Fluttershy, who was stuck doing something with other ponies, to return. What was really strange was that this human seemed to still be alive despite Celestia arriving in Ponyville, which was not expected considering her prior encounters. He thought for sure that one "Danny-boy" a few centuries back would have been the final nail in the coffin for Celestia's mercy toward them.

"And now the human has the spunk to throw the Melody of Harmony my way and try putting the Lord of Chaos to sleep?" He thought to himself, remarking upon the lullaby theme this melody seemed to have. "OOOoooooo, the gloves are coming off!"

The thought of this night being ruined in more ways than one urked Discord to no end, and rather than enjoy doing nothing by himself, he spent his time in the thinking chair trying to devise ways to try and get back at Princess Luna and that otherworldly guest of hers.

"Offer Orange Juice-flavored chocolate milk? Nah, too dull.

"Dust poison joke powder on his toilet paper to see what happens? Nah, that stuff is magic-based. Wouldn't work."

"Perhaps I could trick him into entering a fiddle-playing competition with me, and wake up some manticores placed strategically behind him to issue a comedic chase sequence once the human starts turning ar...no, manticores are not a laughing manner for ponies. Why are mortals so difficult to prank!?!"

He was contemplating all his options when the doors of his tree house swung open. Turning, his mood brighten immediately upon seeing the silhouette of his muse in the door, and his smile turned into a grin as he hopped up from his seat and backstroked through the air toward the middle of the living room.

"Well hello, Fluttershy darling~. And what brings you to your humble abode?" Discord greeted in an enthusiastic voice. He dropped himself over the couch off to the side with one claw holding up his chin, the other making a snapping motion. Suddenly, a martini glass filled with Spectral Scorch Sauce(Now with 20% more Rainbow) and he sipped at it with his teeth. "I thought you said you were going to stay at the castle with the others again. Did you get lonely and miss me~?" He teased, taking a sip from his drink as he grinned. Fluttershy walked past him, her eyes staring downward.

"...Twilight asked me to go home and get some rest. There wasn't really anything else I could do to help." Fluttershy explained. The melancholy in her voice did not go unnoticed by Discord.

"Well, you came back earlier than I thought. A surprise to be sure. You know...We may still have juuuust enough time to do nothing for the rest of the night." Discord offered, setting his martini glass on the nearby table as he stretched out and lounged upon the furniture.

"...No thank you, Discord. Not tonight..." Fluttershy shook her head as she passed the couch and started walking toward the stairs, her face hidden from his view the entire time. This was not the Fluttershy he knew, as she almost never had anything to hide from him in the few months he spent intruding in her life. Though she turned away from him to hid her adorable face behind her mane once more, the Spirit of Disharmony has picked up on telltale signs of Fluttershy's state of mind. What stuck out this time was that her wings hugged her body tightly and securely like a blanket, or a coat, or even a suit of feathery armor.

"Fluttershy, are you okay?" Discord asked, concern evident. "Did something happen?"

The only answer he received was the abrupt closing of her bedroom door.

"Oh...I see. Well if you need me, I'll be here...doing nothing, I suppose." Discord said, turning back toward the couch. As the draconequus sat back down, not a moment went by for the silence to be interrupted as the bedroom door upstairs slammed open and the rapid of hooves running down the stairs echoed through the cottage. Discord was caught off guard as the yellow Pegasus came barreling out and halting right in front of him.

"Discord...you think I'm a good pony, right?" She asked him, her voice wavering. Discord stared at her in disbelief as she kept her gaze downward, not wanting to meet his eyes.

"Fluttershy, my dear, there is no contest! And if there were, you would be crowned "Best Pony"." Discord assured her, confused by her behavior.

"Then... why do I feel so awful?” Her voice wavered, and her body trembled as she hugged herself, eyes glossy with unshed tears. “I was supposed to help, but... but I felt so useless. He needed me to help him since nopony else would, and I missed a changeling bite on him yesterday. And when I was watching Trixie, I looked away for one second and she downed an entire bottle of Berry's Best Brandy."

"An entire bottle!?! Her poor liver, that stuff has a skull on the front!" He said amazement. "How durable are you ponies?"

Fluttershy nodded along. "She kept getting frustrated when she couldn't keep her balance or walk in a straight line... and kept apologizing to Edgar from Twilight's window. She almost fell out on accident until I stopped her, and now Twilight has to be her sober buddy until Trixie falls asleep. I still haven't been able to help the bears with Boo bear's custody yet. I haven't been able to do anything right lately."

Discord nodded along as he started to understand her plight. She was always too caring for her own good, despite it being the job requirement of the Element of Kindness. "Fluttershy, are you scared that everypony is upset with you?" She nodded and sniffled. "Even if they were, there isn't a pony in the world that wouldn't find it in their hearts to forgive you. You're impossible to be angry at, and believe me, I tried getting mad at you. They should all count themselves lucky you're here."

"Really?"

"Absolutely!" Discord exclaimed. "If there is anything I can do, don't hesitate to let me know. I'm not going to sit around while my dear, sweet Fluttershy is having conniptions. Anypony else doing what you do on a daily basis would be a serious downgrade. Your friend Rainbow Dash proved that last year."

Fluttershy paused and thought for a moment. She didn't really know if what she was thinking was a good idea, but she felt an urge to finally ask him. "Discord. Instead of doing nothing, can I do something with you?" Fluttershy asked, tracing random shapes into the wood floorboards of her home. "...Like Cuddle?

"...Come again?" The chaotic Amalgam inquired. Though he wore a poker face, it did little to hide the sheer heat radiating off of his cheeks. He was certain Fluttershy could feel it from there. Unbeknownst to her, a literal fuse suddenly manifested and lit itself, leading to Discord's nigh-bursting heart. He was waiting for a moment like this. An excuse to finally have physical contact with Fluttershy. Something more intimate than a simple hug, much as he enjoyed those. Honestly, she blew Mrs. Huggin Kiss out of the water with her hugs. He always awaited for her first move, but timid as she was, it took a toll on Discord's patience.

"I'm okay. I ju-" Fluttershy sucked in air as she tried to stop herself from sniffling. She trotted up, lifted herself on her hind legs and pressed herself against Discord's chest. "I need-...I need you to hold me...Please. I don't want to be alone tonight. You've always been so good to me, even when you made mistakes."

He reached and grabbed the martini glass of hot sauce and downed it in one shot. The fire was still burning, but at least the fuse was doused. Rather than focus on his own happiness, he instead focus on the turmoil she was feeling.

He wrapped the warm pegasus in his arms as she reciprocated with her wings and forelegs. Though she still shuddered, the tone seemed to be less of sadness... and more of the opposite?

Joy.

Fluttershy nuzzled into the draconequus before looking up and meeting his gaze with her neck was pressed against his chest. Her face was flushed and her eyes were still glossy from the tears she has a knack for shedding, but her smile was as bright as the sun and she felt the warmth of her heart swell within her chest. She tried speaking once more though it did seem to take some of her courage to do so.

"Can we cuddle...In my room?" She asked, her voice quivering and soft as her gaze was locked onto his.

The Spirit of Disharmony is not known to have many reservations, but he certainly feels like he's about to have a heart attack. If he wasn't an immortal embodiment of Chaos, his heart may have popped out of his chest by now.

"As you wish..."

Twilight's POV Twilight's bedroom meanwhile

I sent Fluttershy back home a little while ago. She stayed with Trixie for a while, but I know that she's also been stressed for the past couple of days, with the bear drama and the events a few hours ago. Apparently Trixie got her hooves one of the bottles a bit early and downed an entire half-liter of brandy. Poor Fluttershy was stuck essentially babysitting her, and playing keep away with the second bottle. I felt she could have used the break, but that left me as her sober buddy until she goes to sleep. I don't think I can get anything done when she's like this.

And the melody magic I could just barely hear certainly didn't help. It probably made her more emotional than she should have been.

"I schould have stayed with him...I should have stayed with im... I should ha-OUUGH." Trixie hurled into the toilet.

"♩There there...just let it all out~" I consoled her, rubbing her back with my hoof. Thankfully, Fluttershy had the foresight to tie Trixie's hair into a loose bun on the top of her head so that I didn't have to hold her hair back.

The vomiting didn't last much longer as she stopped with a couple coughs. I grabbed a nearby washcloth and wiped her mouth clean before flushing the toilet. I pulled her upright with my magic and led her to the sink where I turned the faucet on. She drank the water from the running faucet and did her best to swish it around and spit, coughing as she did so.

"~Gross. I'm a mess, aren't I? I'm sorry..." She said, her voice hoarse and weak. I held up a new toothbrush beside her, and Trixie took it and gooed it up with some toothpaste before starting to brush furiously and sloppily.

"I've seen worse." I assured her. "You're actually doing way better than my friend Rarity. She's the white Unicorn that talks "~like this, Darling"." I tried reminding Trixie, and she gave a bit of a frown at her name. "There was one time a fashion critic came and gave her a scathing review of her outfits, and she practically lost her marbles and wallowed in her room. She didn't even know what she was supposed to be wallowing in, only that she had to wallow. The whole reason her outfits were bad to begin with were because we all kept trying to give our two-bits on what looks better." Trixie smiled at that and tried to laugh, but it just turned into a coughing fit. "We should have trusted her to know what she was doing in the first place, and we did fix her reputation in the end."

"You have lots of friends... you like each other a lot. " Trixie mumbled, spitting out and rinsing her mouth out again is she did her best to avoid eye contact with me. "Do you think I'm your friend too?"

"Of course I do. You're not so bad when you're not busy being a big show-off." I teased. She gave me a soft smile and I returned it with a grin.

"Thanks...I wanna be your island too, but I don't know if I'm good enough." Trixie confessed, her eyes tearing up again.

"Oh~kaaaay...don't really know what you mean by that, but I think it's sweet of you to say." I replied. I started to turn the faucet off. "It's enough that we're friends."

"What if I'm not gonna be anypony's friend tomorrow...or ever again..." Trixie sniffed as her eyes started to water. Her nose still sounded really stuffed up from earlier. "What if I mess it all up again."

"I think you're being a little dramatic." I told her. I pulled her towel off the rack and tried to dry her face, but she turned her face away in a big exaggerated motion as she swayed to and fro. "Sometimes, we have fights, but we always find a way to make things better in the end. I promise."

"I know tha-" She hiccuped. "I know that you secretly hate me...and you have every right to..."Trixie mumbled, looking away from me. "I can't believe I did th-THAT to him. He...he trusted me. What if you start trusting me and I-I-I-."

And there is the stuttering again.

She is not taking the alcohol really well, especially with how emotional she is about that human. I'm starting to see a bit of that love that Celestia was talking about. It still amazed me, and without proper data it still didn't make any sense. She seemed like she was clearly love-crazed, but she wasn't in heat nor was she experiencing symptoms of being affected by Love Poison. It seems like a slow burn effect.

"No, Trixie...I don't hate you, but I am worried about you. All you've been talking about for the past few days is Edgar. What about "Trixie"? How's she doing?" I asked her, trying to change the topic. "Does Trixie need water to stop a hangover?" She nodded. "...A lot of water?" She nodded faster.

"Okay. Let's go back to my room." I suggested as she nodded once more. She started walking and I followed, keeping her steady. She was clearly wobbly from all the booze. We stopped briefly so she could get some water from a pitcher of my desk, practically chugging it down on her way back to the guest bed I had brought up for her...before passing by it and collapsing on my bed.

"No Trixie, you need to get back into your bed." I tried pulling her off and getting her onto her back. "Come on..." I pulled her hoof as I helped her sit back on the bed before she turned over and rolled away from me and onto the other side of the bed. "Okay, I guess I can always sleep in it tomorrow." I relented, feeling my eye twitch before I just let it go. I teleported a trash bin over to her side. Can't have her getting sick and ruining my sheets.

"Thanksh Twilight..." She slurred, smiling weakly as she turned her back toward me. Her eyes were glazed and reddish, and one of her eyelids drooped as if it was fighting with her and trying to convince Trixie to fall asleep. "You're too purfect!"

"I'm not perfect. I'm far from it, but I'm glad you think so." I said, blushing as I smiled at her compliment. "Get some sleep, stumbleflank."

I turned to walk over to the guest mattress that I had brought up before I felt a blue aura grab my tail. I looked back to see Trixie with a pout on her face, clearly in defiance before looking at me. That pout had a red tinge around her cheeks, probably from the alcohol. "No, you really are..." She started mumbling as her eyes fluttered. "You're beautiful, smart, strong...I wish I could be like you...Don't take him away from me Twilight."

"Take who?" I asked, confused.

"Edgar...He'd think you're perfect too..." I started blushing. "You want him too, don't you?"

"Trixie, I thought we were going to sleep." I said, trying to steer the conversation away from Edgar. I don't know what happened between her and Edgar, but it seems to have really affected her. "Why don't we talk about something else, or talk about this in the morning?"

Trixie didn't seem to hear me. She kept mumbling and airing out her thoughts. Her mind seemed to be all over the place, but they seemed important to her, so I took this chance to listen. "You have a cashel. You're the richest pony I ever met ...and I'm not. You keep making friends with everypony, and you're a princess! You've already won. Don't take Edgar from me too. He makesh me happy."

I sighed.

I guess we're doing this now.

"I'm not taking him from you, Trixie. You're jumping to conclusions because you had a little too much to drink." I tried shaking my tail away, but Trixie's magical grasp held on. "Why do you even like him if you just met him?"

The magic holding onto me dropped immediately as Trixie looked down in thought. "He makes me laugh and smile. He's nice, and he listens. He listens and worries about me." She paused. "I also really liked how it feels when I help him, and when he helps me. Helping ponies feels good."

"You know, my foal sitter is the Princess of Love. She knows a thing or two, and if its real..."

"It IS!!!" She yelled again, the force of her voice almost propelling Trixie off my bed and onto the floor.

"Okay, okay..." I placated, holding my hooves up as in an effort to calm her down. "...and if she shows that it is, then you could can try talking to him tomorrow morning about what he wants."

"I haven't even asked him if he wanted to give me a chance..."Trixie calmed down, looking down at my mattress bashfully. "Do you want to ask him?"

"No Trixie, I'm think fine for now." I shook my head as I tried to get her back on topic. "He probably doesn't know a thing about ponies or our customs. Aside from me being a Princess, I can't be that interesting or desirable to him if we just met.

"He knows lots about us! Lots...lots." Trixie trailed off during her drunken reasoning. It sounded like she was trying to rationalize to herself if Edgar would be interested in dating her. "...LLLLots."

"What if you talked to him about being friends? Just friends? That might be better for now, right?" I asked.

"Don't change what I'm talking about, you-you Alicorn! You're a bad li~er. Not like Edgar, but still a nice pony. You're the besht. Bet-" Trixie hiccupped before pausing, as if she forgot what she was saying. She was slightly swaying from side to side as she sat up in my bed. "You're better than Trixie... You could ask him out and he'd say yesh...Promish me you won't take him away from me? I'm gonna be his best mare. I want to be better, and now...and no-" Trixie seemed to lose her train of thought for but a moment before suddenly finding it again. "...And now I have somepony else to change for. I have a reason to work hard now...Shparkle, I'll make you-a deal!"

And now she's back to the bargaining stage of grief. The poor mare is going to have such a bad hangover tomorrow morning.

"A deal?" I asked, humoring her with a yawn. I should really get to bed too. I need to wake up bright and early to meet up with Shiny and Cadance to figure out this Edgar crisis first thing tomorrow. Once they come back, we don't have an issue keeping an eye on the Trixie and the human.

She nodded vigorously. "If you let me love him and he loves me, then we can be in a herd...Together!" The unicorn slurred out as she grinned at me triumphantly.

"A herd?" I asked, a twinge of a blush started to appear. This mare was completely wasted. "That's moving a bit quickly, isn't it?"

"Yeah, a herd! I'll let you in my herd. Then you can love him, and even when you love him, I'll love you." She smiled, almost dreamily. "Yeah...I'll love you too..."

I wasn't sure how to talk to her about this, given her level of intoxication. I just hoped that she will be sober enough to listen in the morning or that she would forget this by tomorrow. What would Cadence do in this situation?

"A serious relationship like a herd wouldn't work between the two us if you are forced into it with a tit-for-tat, or if it's treated like a business transaction. It has to come from the heart, or something like that. Besides, you'd technically be in my herd because of my "Princess privileges" and all that. I don't have a herd, but I'd end up absorbing you guys in mine by default, right?"

I lightly tugged at my hooves, but Trixie still held on. "Oh yeah...you're a princess now. That's sho weird..." She murmured, trying to comprehend my status.

"Yeah, I know." I nodded.

"Mmmm still mad at you for that..."

I snorted. "For what, becoming a Princess?" I asked, doing my best to hold back a stifled chuckle. "You just said I was "The Best" a second ago."

"Mmmyeah...but Trixie forgives you. So long as we're together and we can love each other, we can join your herd. You have to take us both though." She slurred.

I suddenly lost balance and fell onto my bed with her as she pulled me in. There was more than enough room for the two of us, but I couldn't help feeling extremely cramped as she hugged me and nuzzled into my neck. She is either a really lovey drunk, or she needs comforting after what happened with him. I don't think she's actually knows what she's saying about having the three of us be in a herd. Even if Edgar wasn't planning on going home, we don't even know if he would go with something like that. He did say that humans only date and marry other humans, so he might not feel that way about ponies. Besides, I literally just met him.

"Uhhh, T-Trixie?” I stammered, my whole body stiffening from the unexpected touch. Why am I not moving away? Why is my heart racing? Her words were slurred, but her gaze felt... genuine. “You’re not serious about... about loving me like that, are you?” I felt her blueberry-scented mane brush the underside of my chin as Trixie nodded her head. She looked up and had a deep blush appearing, and it didn't look like it was only because of the alcohol. "You're considering a herd with me? As in "more than just friends"?"

She kept nuzzling into me but this time she had a softer look in her eyes, and there seemed to be more feeling behind it. I could smell the mint on her breath as her tail intertwined around my own, as well as another fruity smell that I had yet to identi-It was Trixie! The mare is starting to get frisky!!!

"Uh, Trixieeeee...?" I asked out loud in unease and a blush even worse than earlier on my face. It'd be a simple matter for me to teleport away, or even push her hooves off of me.

Except I wasn't doing it.

"Why wasn't I moving away or stopping her? This is moving too fast." My inner voice screamed, but my own heat was starting to overtake my reasoning.

Trixie was not only giving me cutesy eyes, but she was clearly trying to coax the both of us into going further. But it's so fast! I don't even know if I should be laying next to her like this, let alone be thinking of her like this.

"Why not? I'd wanna try. Once you're in a herd, you just...it just clicks, you know? We'd still be friends...but more, right?" Trixie continued slurring, but it wasn't as pronounced as before. Rather, she seemed to give serious thought and care into her words, even if her voice kept trailing off.

"I-, uh, I..." I couldn't find my own words, as they seemed caught in my throat and refused to come out.

"You're sho cute when you shtutter like that..." She leaned in and kissed me on the lips. It was just a quick wet peck with the taste of berries and mint, but I still tasted it. Trixie didn't go very deep and backed off almost immediately with a blush on her face that matched my own. Both me and Trixie quiet for what felt like eternity as we looked into each other's eyes. Trixie's were glazed and half-closed with an air of seduction in spite of her intoxicated state. Mine...were probably not handling this very well. She broke the silence once more. "You...you wanna keep going?" She asked, biting her bottom lip.

I was so paralyzed by what had just happened that I couldn't move my body. Before I had the chance to think it over, she moved back in to kiss me on the mouth once more, her lips lingering on mine this time around. I could taste the alcohol on her breath, and as I heard her horn's aura appear I felt pleasant sensations running across my body. Lightly pinching my teats, gently tugging at my tail, and massaging my mammaries. It was hard to contain myself and my own growing arousal as I moaned into it as I felt my eyelids flutter.

"MMmmnn-NO!" However, it only lasted for a second before I finally found the mental fortitude and pulled away from it. I pushed the sauced unicorn away from me, causing her to let out a squeak at my abrupt rejection. "Woah there, mare! Woah! Woah? Woah. First of all...Woah! I get that you're feeling a lot of things right now, but I'm a Princess, remember? There's rules to that kind of thing. Even if I wasn't, you can't just go around kissing and touching ponies like that. That's like skipping the first three chapters of dating!"

It wasn't easy given that I am admittedly riled up too, but I mustered up my best stern expression to try and get Trixie off my flank. She scooted back with her eyes droopy and unfocused and a deep blush staining her cheeks as if she had something to be ashamed of, while her tail twitched from behind her in discomfort. "Not again...MMmmm sorry, Twilight." Trixie apologized, and clenched her lips shut.

"It's...f-fine." I stuttered a bit. Despite myself, my hindquarters seemed to clench in excitement, as if it wasn't even my body anymore. "You've been drinking, too, so I'd feel bad if you did anything you'd regret in the morning. That'd be taking advantage of you. Do you understand?" Trixie nodded slowly. "I'm just going to go to the bathroom real quick. Are you going to be fine for a few minutes?" She didn't answer back as she nodded again. This time, there was barely a tilt as she only looked at the mattress, almost as if she were embarrassed and saddened beyond belief. My hoof hovered over her mane in comfort, before I caught myself and backed up. "Okay. I'll be back!" I practically shouted before making my way over to my own bathroom door and closing it tight, letting out the breath I didn't even know I was holding in.

It took a moment or two of me panting over my own sink to turn it on and splash myself with cold water. As I started calming down, so did my arousal. However, thoughts of what almost happened came swirling into my mind once more. "Ughhh..." I let out a frustrated sigh. How could I get a wink of sleep after all of that?!?

Once my face was somewhat clean and my cheeks were dry, I walked back inside my bedroom to check on Trixie once more.

She was asleep in a deep, alcohol-induced stupor, with her muzzle against my mattress and a small amount of drool on the corner of her lips. I guess she was staying awake to talk to me in the first place.

Rather than disturb her, I went ahead and simply laid on the guest mattress on the floor. It was comfy enough, but it was taking longer than I thought to go to sleep since my mind abuzz with thoughts...

Thoughts about what Trixie said...

About what Trixie had done...

About what we were about to do...

I let my hoof drift unconsciously toward my nethers while thinking back to what had almost happened with Trixie and I tonight. I could still taste the fruity alcohol on my breath and feel her lips pressed up against mine. The smell of her pheromones lingered in the air like an intoxicating perfume.

It was only a slight brush at first, but soon, my hoof gently grazed across my teats and found purchase as I sensually teased open the fleshy entrance at my hindquarters. There was a faint, dampening warmth where it was touching the fur beneath me as I spread open. A soft moan escaped my mouth, and that was enough to snap me out of it. "NO." I yelled in my head, snapping out of it and rolling my eyes. I am the Princess of Friendship for goodness sake. I'm not going to masturbate in the same room as another pony! What's wrong with me? WHY IS EVERYPONY SO LEWD TONIGHT!!!

The most frustrating part were not just the thoughts I was having, but the pleasant emotions I started feeling when she brought up the idea of a herd. Not just with her, but with Edgar. I thought more and more about what she said, and I started thinking more and more about her offer. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach as my thoughts between Trixie and resting human, which made my head spin.

At least with Trixie I had some interaction with her in the past. There is a bit of history and tension between us, but she really does seem to be trying to be a nicer pony. She obviously could use some help and encouragement on that end, though, but that can always be learned. Her kind words earlier and the way she tried constantly fretted to make sure her human friend was alright was a good sign that she does care, at least somewhat. In fact, her being willing to stick around and go through all this for Edgar says a lot about her and how she feels about him. Could she show the same care for any of her other friends?

Yet with Edgar, I don't even know him. Still, there is something about him that I find fascinating. Was it the way he acted, or the fact that he was a completely different species? His knowledge could share could teach us more about his world's technology and how to implement it in our own. His personality also seems to mesh well with Trixie's as well, so I could see them in a herd together if it wasn't for what we already knew about his touch...

No matter. Even if his touch was affecting Trixie and other ponies, we can't deny that he did put his life on the line when he didn't have to. Whatever horrible things Celestia saw from the other humans in the past was probably stopping her from seeing this. He was there for Apple Bloom when I wasn't, and he was the Deus Ex Machina that we needed then. I'll have to try and repay him for his kindness and bravery somehow.

Wow, I'm acting like such a hypocrite. I was getting on Trixie's case about how much Edgar was on her mind, but I'm falling down the same rabbit hole.

And the more I thought about him, the more I thought about what made me appreciate him appearing in my life...

Him calling us pretty...

Answering my non-stop slew of questions until I ran out of paper...

The fear in his eyes as he ran away...and the gentle hoof Edgar had shown when I tried to stop him. He didn't want to hurt anypony on purpose even when he was afraid for his life...

But more than all of that, was the excitement and admiration I saw in his eyes when we met. When he looked at me...and came to a startling realization...

I think I...like Edgar?

My heart fluttered, and for a brief moment, I had to shake myself out of that train of thought.

It's not "like" like it was with Flash back when we thought about going out. It can't be. But the more I think about it, the harder it is to stop, as if something was awakened in me by Trixie's accusation.

It isn't right. I only known him for a day now as well, but the butterflies in my stomach seemed to move into my heart and started to flutter the more I thought about him.

...

Is this why Celestia is so scared of him?

This was with me only touching him a few times. Our contact couldn't have been more than a minute in total. I can't imagine what Trixie might be going through. As much as I wanted to think more about the situation, I realized that I really did need to sleep. There was a lot to do tomorrow, and I had a lot on my mind.

"Ughh..." I groaned, turning around and trying to find a comfortable position.

This is not how I was expecting to spend my night...

*Princess Luna's POV Third-person***

"Maybe...we are letting our desire get the better of us? We have touched him previously, but this was not of wanton lust, but of compassion and appreciation. That being sa-" A knock on the outer doors of Edgar's chambers broke Luna from her musings and conjecture. "That must be her..." She assumed.

Luna got up from her impromptu bed and walked toward the thrice-sealed door. Using the strength of her Alicorn magic, she opened them gently and with enough care to avoid making too much noise. Simply opening the runed portion would be difficult for most unicorns to say the least, but not to the degree that it could stop an Alicorn or even a skilled magic user like Twilight when she was still a Unicorn. There may even have been quite a few guards and talented unicorns present in Ponyville that could move the glass, but that was not the point. Rather, the nullification zone surrounding Edgar's quarters are made specifically to dampen and contain the melody magic swirling around him. It was strange, but the theory behind it made sense. Edgar's unique properties essentially made him a vortex. A "void" that harmony and chaos chased each other around, much like how hot air chased cold to create a Tornado. In time, everything may balance out but there is not enough known about him to confirm this.

It was not perfect considering that the balcony in his room was open-air, but having the rune glass available to absorb some of the latent Melody was better than nothing. The alternative was making his room air-tight.

As the doors slid open, the Lunar guard posted outside stood at attention and issued a salute upon seeing Princess Luna. Between them, a bright yellow earth-pony maid was bowing toward Princess Luna. Her coat was almost glowing against the dark cool backdrop of Twilight's castle, and her blonde mane was tied in neatly braided pigtails running down her neck. If one had just woken up, they likely would have squinted reflexively upon seeing her this late at night. Behind Tidy Trot was a serving cart packed to the brim with the previously requested items, with one notable exception.

"My deepest apologies, your majesty, but there weren't any bottles of Radiant Rise anywhere in the castle." She said apologetically. "Will the sambuca do instead, your majesty?"

"Quite alright, Tidy Trot. Shadow Swirl is an acceptable substitute and fortunately our preference. We thank thee for thine service." Luna replied, and soon a magical aura surrounded the handles of the cart. As Luna guided the cart back inside with her magic, Tidy trot moved out of the way.

"Princess Luna, is there anything else I can do for you?" Tidy asked, her tone polite and eager to help.

"We appreciate thine willingness to assist us, but that would be all for now. Continue with thine duties." Luna thanked Tidy Trot for her help, and waited until the dutiful maid turned and headed on her way before turning toward the guards stationed on either side of the door. "We are not to be disturbed. This is an order." She ordered firmly, and with a nod, both guards returned their gazes straight ahead and stood at attention.

Once the doors closed behind her, Princess Luna cast a sound-dampening spell around the exterior of the room and took a deep breath to collect her thoughts. It should last until morning.

She could feel her heartbeat pick up slightly, and while the gnawing doubts started to return, she tried distracting herself by readying a pot of coffee, setting the bottle of sambuca off to the side. She doubted that she would need much to convince him. Miss Lulamoon may have gotten off lucky after intoxicating him as much as she said she did(with barely a slap on the ankle), but with the ardor flowing through his system, the sambuca was just "insurance". He needs to be comfortable with this...

"...Perhaps we may be taking it too far?" She thought for a shot time. That is, until the water within the coffee pot she was focusing on started to steam with a low hiss, reminding Luna of the events earlier this evening. After a few moments, Luna shook her head. "No, she left us no choice. Not exercising Amor'verus Scutum would be the irresponsible action. We can respect Celestia's past to understand her fears, but we can not risk her further damaging our relationships and Edgar's perceptions of us upon a perceived slight, let alone seriously harming him. We would only be wasting precious time by doubting our resolve at this critical juncture. Besides, it's not as if we love him as such...nor are we doing this for our ourselves. Thanks to our sister's warning, I'm prepared. Even if this "false love" blossoms, we know it is false and can consider this now."

As difficult as this task is starting to sound, Luna was now sure that this was the right action. "We would be more satisfied with the guarantees that he brings... this is the right course of action to take, even if he may not understand it at first. For Equestria, Edgar's safety must be secured. Even if he has never looked at a pony in this way, we can not take "no" for an answer. We shall do whatever it takes to welcome him into our royal herd even if it is during his sleep..."

...

Luna's heart skipped a beat and even felt hollow for a moment. She knew it had to be done, but now that she's actually about to do it she felt herself getting cold hooves now that it was put in perspective what she was actually doing. It disgusted her.

It reminded her of what the "old" her would do... She's not that mare anymore.

...If he listens... He will understand, and he will finally have a mare he can trust.

As she set the coffee pot down and walked over to Edgar staring at his groin. It has since stayed flaccid since, but because her venom is still within his system, maybe there was a chance of stirring it once more.

Luna leaned forward and her muzzle was almost touching his member.

"Haaaaaaaaaaah." She breathed out hot air across his length before giving it a gentle peck... then waited.

It twitched...

"Haaaaaaaaaah." She breathed once more, and once more it twitched more strongly as it started to enlarge and bloat to its prior size. It wasn't quite enough yet, though, so taking her muzzle away from his groin she got within kissing distance of Edgar and she hummed out erotically as she used her lips to nip at his ear. At that point, the speed of which his penis was hardening was a sight to behold for her. Now all she had to do was keep him erect and do her best to slowly stir him awake. If not, proceed forward. Luckily, that shouldn't happen. He was already giving signs that he stirring, and was going to wake up any second now. It was only a matter of time before-

"No..." Luna's ears peaked up as she looked at the human's face, expecting to see him starting to wake up. Her ears and face dropped when she saw the grimace of fear he had in his still sleeping form. "Please no...Mm sorry."

"A nightmare." She thought to herself. Not the reaction she was expecting.

"Edgar," Luna gently coaxed and shook him as she pressed her hoof against his shoulders. "Please awaken...Sir Edgar?" Luna's eyes shot open as she saw a tear come down from his eyes.

"Make it stop...please." He shivered and shuttered out.

"Edgar...please wake up. You're having a nightmare. Tis not real." Luna shook him harder, becoming more worried and confused. His nightmare seemed to be getting worse all of a sudden, and Luna had no answers for the cause. That is, until he spoke once more and gave Luna a depressing realization.

"Make her stop..." Edgar let out another soft whimper and a shudder that sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

"Oh no." Luna spoke out loud.

"...It is of Telsona...It had to be...It only started intensifying once we had started coaxing him." Luna thought to herself as she felt a pit of guilt forming in her stomach. "He's reliving his encounter..." As much of a blessing as his magical immunity was, so too was it a curse for Luna as she could not enter his dreams to help him vanquish this nightmare...one that she feels she was responsible for. As she witnessed his face twist in fear, he started to sweat even more.

She couldn't bear the sight, and for the next few minutes, Luna briefly forgot all about her plans. All about her title as a Princess as she stripped all of her crown jewelry off before climbing into the bed with Edgar. Careful not to poke him with her horn, she nuzzled up beside his body as close as she possibly could by hugging herself against him, and him against her. Though he was tall, she was a fair bit bigger than him and found the position at his side awkward. She would probably have fallen off the bed had she not been so close to him. Once she was satisfied with her spot, her eyes rested upon his face and found that the tortured grimace on his face softened somewhat, but was not gone.

Luna let out a surprised grunt when Edgar pulled her close in his sleep and squeezed her in his embrace, and one of his hands found purchase with one of her hooves as it seemed to latch on and squeeze. His expression still wasn't peaceful, but the small change was at least some form of improvement. "His hand...this must be a comforting gesture for his kind." She thought to herself. It felt to her that the longer she was in his embrace, the more it helped him...as if being in physical contact with a pony could help ease him out of this. And as she cared for him, she started to hear something she had not noticed until then.

Melody magic, the sounds of harmony, started to resonate within Edgar's chamber as it grew above a whisper...It was peaceful...and he looked so peaceful now, didn't he?

"Shhhhhhh...Shhhhhhh" Luna hushed and soothed, and she hummed along to the tune that she was listening to. She no longer had confidence to do this to him without him knowing... Not without trying her best to convince him with the truth...

Even if it may be a lie, it is for Equestria’s safety and his. If he listens, he will understand.

He has to.

Princess Luna's POV Third Person a short time after Edgar drifted back to sleep after their night together

Princess Luna laid staring at the sleeping human, who has since fallen asleep.

"The poor col-no, the stallion must have been holding it all in even before he was bitten..."She thought to herself.

She had never in her long lifetime seen a stallion so resistant to coitus. Even if it was after his nightmare, he was under the effects of a changeling bite. Oddly enough, she sensed no ill will or disgust from him. She couldn't help but wonder if it was truly her or if stallions have simply changed from her time before her banishment. She learned quite quickly on her return that when she tried propositioning guards, they were either too scared of her upon her first return or simply thought she was testing them.

Not Edgar though. He never showed any fear of her.

"oh, there it is." Luna thought to herself..."That music from before Edgar had awoken."

She was sure of it. Conscious or no, Edgar was having a direct effect on the melody magic in the castle, and it seems to be somewhat effected by his mood. After they've made love, it seems as if Edgar's now calmed mind is resonating with the melody magic. Perhaps, there is a way it could be used? To help keep spirits high in Equestria...to strike fear to the changelings and all who would dare harm those the royals have been charged to rule over. And now, after making love with Edgar, Celestia no longer has a say in whether or not Edgar has to leave or not.

...

"Making love??? Using Edgar?" Luna shook her head at that thought. "How could you even think of using those two phrases together? Especially when you know it was all based on a lie. If what Celestia said was true, then...No. Now that they have shared this tender night, Celestia can not harm him. He can now be free to stay with us without any obligation to return. Surely if he hears more about our plight, he would rise to the occasion. His braggart persona that he had when we first met in the fields...it was his own mask. One that he let slip many times tonight."

"Is Ponyville alright? Did something else happen while I was sleeping?"
"You didn't answer my question. What about Trixie or Twilight? Ponyville?"

"The look of relief he had when we told him Ponyville was okay...truly noble." Luna thought. He seemed to have trouble remembering why he was laying there in the first place, but his first thoughts were of others...

"Nonono Luna, it's not that, really! I just don't want to take advantage of you, so I'm just trying to find another way around this..."
"This was a bad time to be joking, and I'm sorry. Just please stop crying..."

"His almost comical panic when we misunderstood how he felt the entire time...He was so concerned that he was taking advantage of us, and not the inverse." Luna puzzled. "Perhaps roles between mares and stallions are reversed, or at the very least unorthodox in his world...and yet"

"Frankly, I'd feel more comfortable with you than "Princess Zelda"."

"...Luna, after everything I have seen you do, how could I ever see you as an animal and not the incredible pony I met. How can I look at you as anything less than my friend?"

Luna felt a tear in her eye that she wiped away. A real one...? Not the tears of frustration she had when she was trying to get his approval, but of genuine sadness...? He should've had a real "Zelda" tonight.

How could she still call herself his friend when she mislead him? She helped him with Telsona's venom, but even as it coursed through his system, it was no longer dangerous enough at that point to steal his innocence. It should have been given to somepony special. Somepony he loves.

"Love..ou..." Edgar mumbled in his sleep.

Luna looked toward the stallion in surprise before she shook her head in shame. She could never say that back and actually mean it to him. Not without the guilt eating her up inside. She only wished she could have done more to prevent this from happening. She wished she could have had the courage to trust in fate rather than take it into her own hooves.

She brushed his hair away from his forehead before leaning close and pressing her own forehead against his. She couldn't tell if he was dreaming about her or not, but she knew he was at peace and it made her heart warm.

Then came a whisper from Princess Luna.

"I pledge this oath upon thee, Noble Edgar. My Morning Star. No harm shalt befall thee in thine time here...no matter the circumstance". I need to be cruel to you again...but I promise be a better friend for thee, and...I'm sorry. For everything." She whispered as she nuzzled up closer to his chest, letting his warmth envelop her as she drifted off to sleep at the sound of the lullaby in the background...

Author's Note

Oh shit...Celestia never approved of Luna doing the nasty with Edgar???

Luna lied about the venom putting Edgar in danger???

Sexual tension between Twilight and Trixie?!?

Fluttershy and Discord make the best ship???

Anyway,

Time to find out if I am being big-brained in my story, or if this was just sounding dumb and complicated. If you can't tell, I am very insecure and rely on comments and feedback to help fill the hole within me and cope with my abandonment issues once my neopet died.

Publishing this at 4:23AM my time. This may be a grave error, but we'll see.

If you see anything obvious or confusing, let me know so I can fix it or expand on it. Other than that, I'm going to bed. After a week, I am removing the word "unedited" in the chapter title.

Lastly, will probably be going on a small hiatus when Elden Ring drops it's DLC, as said previously, so another chapter might take a bit longer to come out than normal. Just forewarning.

Chapter Twelve: Doubts
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Twelve: Doubts

Author's Note

Celestia Jumpscare

I'm back. Sorry for the delay, all!

This chapter and I have been staring at each other for weeks now, so I'm going to post what I have at 5:00AM so that I do not have a chance to second guess myself like I've been doing.

Let me know what you think and if you see any glaring inconstancies or typos. I think I did a pretty good job at checking for them, but I'm always welcome to be corrected. This will stay in the rough draft stage for roughly a week, and if I don't hear anything, consider this done-zo until the next chapter.
Edit: Removed the Rough Draft in title.

Lastly, some(well a lot of) NSFW elements in this chapter. Do you guys prefer that I mark them with a CTRL+F skip? Or do you just skim through them often times? I'd like to hear your thoughts.

Chapter Twelve: Doubts

Celestia's P.O.V Third-person

Princess Celestia woke up quite early to the coming day. Obviously before she could raise the sun, as is natural for one who brings about the day. It was a habit deeply ingrained into her very being for the past thousand or so years. She'll admit that she was concerned that she would hardly get any sleep since last night, but despite the events from yesterday she felt relaxed and refreshed in the serene ambiance of her guest room within the crystalline walls of Twilight Sparkle's castle.

An unintended benefit of this castle manifesting itself is the sheer volume inside as well as the dozens of different rooms within. It felt much bigger on the inside, and Twilight Sparkle chose to add thoughtful touches and comforts befitting royalty for each guest room since she had an overabundance of them. Many of them have been tailored by her to suit the needs of her friends and family. Funnily enough, some of these rooms served as critiques for how she viewed certain ponies.

Take the Crystal Empire's most talked about "power couple", for example.

Prince Cadance and Prince Shining Armor's room had a strange assortment of items to those that didn't know them well. They ranged from a pink heart-shaped bed, a weapons rack with assorted armaments hoof-cuffs(which Celestia suspected the couple likely use, though not with Twilight's use case in mind), pink blue bean bag chairs with a reading lamp between them, along with a bookshelf containing gushy(and frankly quite steamy) romance novels and graphic comic books, a vanity set with dozens of make-up shades, and a table-top for table top role-playing and board games. There was even a miniature refrigerator that was intended to be stocked with corn dogs upon being notified that a particular visit from Shining Armor was going to happen. It seemed a little-on-the nose at the time, but the rest of the royals found it to be thoughtful of her to go so far.

This critique of ponies was no more evident than in Princess Celestia's guest room, and it reflected thir deep bond and the respect her student has for her teacher.

Celestia's room was visibly "Celestia's", as one would tell at first glance. Fully outfitted with items and luxuries she would need to complete her duties away from her study in Canterlot. There were a great many books littering the many shelves against the walls, and her room had a writing desk complete with quills and a parchment wax sealing kit with Celestia's insignia. The artwork littering the walls had many motifs of the sun and the light it brings, with even the round bed in the middle of her room being decorated with white and yellow sheets. While this was nice, Celestia's favorite addition to her room was an inconspicuous cork board that was hanging off to the side of her desk, along with the items hanging off it.

The first of which was the fact that Twilight took the liberty of writing out both notes and schedules of Ponyville businesses and hot-spots, as well as a hoof-written "take-out" menu with impeccable penmareship. This menu contained items from both the restaurants in Ponyville as well as underlined items from Sugarcube Corner that she thought Celestia would like. This menu had a suspicious amount of items from Sugarcube corner, but Celestia knows that she would end up gravitating toward Sugarcube corner without this menu anyway, if only to say hello to Pinkie Pie and her landlords. Celestia could always just look at the menu upon walking into the establishment, but she had a feeling that Twilight did this herself to try and save Celestia as much time as possible in her busy days. Twilight could probably give Miss Raven Inkwell a run for her money if she wasn't so focused on learning more about the Magic of Friendship.

The other item was a folder containing a few dozen letters and drawings of the Ponyville school house's young students, addressed directly to her. They were such inquisitive minds, asking "Where does the sun go when it goes down?" or "How heavy is it?". One even asked what would happen if there were two suns...Celestia found herself envious of Miss Cheerilee's lifestyle from time to time.

Oh, and one mustn't forget that there was even an avian roost in case Celestia ever wanted to bring Philomena to visit.

When it comes to ponies she cares about, Twilight Sparkle certainly does not know when to hold back. While Celestia had no need to use her private office often, she couldn't help but admire the gesture and could feel the love Twilight poured into each item in this room.

Even after the events of yesterday and the day before, Celestia had never been woken up more comfortably nor relaxed. As a matter of fact, she slept quite as well for the first time in centuries. Was it the fact that she finally cleared the air and spoke more of her past to her newfound family? Was it that Ponyville's recovery was nearing it's completion? Perhaps, it could have simply been the start of a new day for her. Nevertheless, this was a good morning for her and her sister's subjects, and she would not let it go to waste.

After a trip to her room's washroom and making herself presentable, she silently moved across the room. Her hooves make little sound on the smooth crystal floor in defiance to the pep in her step. She even found herself humming a little tune that she herself doesn't remember hearing anywhere, yet the melody seemed natural and easy enough to continue without much thought. The time she spent sleeping had energized and revitalized her to literally start the day for herself and everypony else, and she is glad that her sister offered to take first watch.

Approaching her room's balcony, she prepares herself for the sacred duty she has performed since she was first bestowed the responsibility—the raising of the sun. This daily ritual, more than a mere task, is a profound expression of her connection to all of Equestria and its inhabitants, a renewal of her promise to usher in light and warmth to her beloved land.

Oh, one more thing...The balcony of the room Twilight picked for Princess Celestia's faced east toward where the rising sun should be. What a thoughtful decision of Twilight's...

Yet, as Celestia walked onto the cool dark balcony and began to raise her sun, a sight unexpectedly greeted her. Luna's moon still hung high in the sky rather than barely kissing the horizon as it should have been by now, as Celestia's internal clock was telling her. It's presence was not necessarily unwelcome, but it was overdue for its rest. In the soft light of her approaching dawn, Celestia stood there confused.

Celestia signaled out into the ether of the castle in attempts to get a response from her sister.

("Luna, are you awake?")

Of which, none came.

Flaring her wings out, she used her Alicorn magic to take hold over Luna's moon to lay it to rest until its return later in the evening. It's certainly been a while since Celestia had to do this, but even if it was a more strenuous start to her morning than she would like, it had to be done. After all, letting it hang in the sky would cause their subjects to think the worst. Her little ponies can be jumpy like that.

("Luna, I lowered your moon for you. I understand if you are tired this morning, but you must not let this get in the ways of the responsibilities we share. Has the human awoken yet?")

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Still no response.
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("Luna. I know you're awake. Please say something... Are you still upset with me?")

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Silence... Is it possible that the nullification zone in Edgar's room was interfering somehow? It's not air-tight, and it's only meant to dampen the melody magic swirling around him. Then again, this method of containment was theory and Edgar was the first human it was being used on.

Celestia extended her ethereal reach and let her mind telepathically echo across the castle to link with another Alicorn.
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("Twilight, are you awake?")

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No response...
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Until suddenly...

("Yes Princess Celestia. I'm here with Shiny and Cadance, as well as Blueblood. They got here a short while ago. I would have asked Luna to join, but her guards said she wasn't in her room.")

("She wouldn't be. Shortly after you left, Luna said she was going to stay up the entire night to fix her sleep schedule. In the event Edgar the Human had awoken during the night, she was planning on placating him, should he still be concerned of me. However, I had not been able to reach her. I suspect that the Nullification Barriers we installed may be interfering with our ability to communicate. I did not have a chance to put its use into practice until now, so I had not foreseen a situation where we would need speak to somepony from across it.")

("That doesn't sound right. She was able to call guards in to detain one of her centurions while inside Edgar's room. If she can send a link out, we should be able to send a link in. She should have heard you.")

("...Twilight, can you get in contact with Luna?")

A bright bubbly voice started to make itself known in Princess Celestia's mind.

("~♫Good Moooorning Auntie Tiaaaaa~♫. Shiny and I got here from the train about an hour ago. Twilight and her new Unicorn friend woke up early and met us at the train station, so we're passing the time learning more about this "Edgar" stallion. Is it true he kicked a Changeling Queen's flank? Also, did you and Auntie Luna make up yet? I heard you both got into a fight. What happened?")

("We can discuss this later with Luna, but not right now. Anything Twilight?")

("She's not answering. Maybe she fell asleep?")

Princess Celestia was starting to get anxious now. She felt her fur rise on end as a shiver went through her body as she paced back and forth on the balcony. Her blood ran colder as her ears started to rise straight up. Something was very wrong here, and her intuition caused her mind to run rampant. She was terrified of what may be happening right now, and turned her attention back to her attempts to reach Luna, but with more power behind her attempt.

("Luna, I know that you were upset that I wouldn't apologize to him...I'll do it now. I will bow my head to him and explain why I can't trust him, but I'll be civil...I'll even make pancakes for the both of you to help make up for it. Just give me a sign that you can hear me...please.")

"...Please." At the same time she tried to reach out to Luna, Celestia whispered this out loud to herself as if to get through to her sister by some means other than their telepathic connection. She waited a moment...

Then two...

Then five…

Nothing from Luna...

("...Twilight, tell your brother to assemble any of the Crystal guard he may have brought with him and meet me outside Edgar's room as quickly as they possibly can.")

("What?!? Wait a minute, what's going on???")

A golden glow enveloped the golden halberd that was leaning against the wall of her room before it levitated and made its way out the door, trailing just barely at Celestia's side. In truth, her first instinct upon learning a human had made its way to Ponyville was to dispose of it quickly. She's been so sure of their nature from her past experiences that she was no longer willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. That is...until her blade was halted upon learning that this human managed to save her little ponies twice.

Celestia could not believe it to be true. She knew first hoof what they could be capable of in a short time, and yet Twilight and Luna seemed so certain that Edgar was noble. Surely this was simply another one of their cruel machinations, right? All it takes is a simple touch for them to start weeding themselves into your hearts.

So why did she still hesitate? Why was she still so foolish?

("Auntie, why do you sound scared?...Is this about the Hoo-man?)"

No. She is being tested right now, and she could not afford to let her doubts slow her hooves. Not again... Not when the lives of her loved ones are at stake.

Celestia stepped outside of her room, and noticed a small group of her solar guards were patrolling a short distance from her room. They immediately noticed and saluted in response to their princess's sudden presence.

"Come with me. There is trouble within Princess Twilight's castle, and my sister may be in danger from the Human." Princess Celestia's voice was as serious as her guards have ever heard her. It was laced with authority, and was missing the softness she reserves for her loyal subjects. This told the guards what the stakes could be, and they both steeled themselves and followed Princess Celestia.

("Auntie, you're not answering us. What's going on? Twilight told us what you said, and Shiny just left to grab his sword. The Unicorn magician is starting to get really anxious. I don't want to repeat what she's yelling about you right now.")

Celestia started walking down the halls at a brisk pace with the guards behind her...then trotting...then galloping...then flying as her own guards struggled to keep up. She'll have to be on the lookout for any sign of Edgar being outside his room on the way there.

("Luna is not answering. Miss Lulamoon may yell if she likes, but we must ensure my sister's safety. Have your guards keep Trixie away from Edgar's room. It's not her fault, but she will want to try and slow you down. Be prepared for anything. I am making my way there and will hopefully be there before you arrive, but if I'm not, do NOT enter without me unless you are certain something is wrong. Humans lie, and they can be cunningly cruel. It may attempt to manipulate you all into a disadvantageous position. Take care not fall for its tricks and for Faust's sake do not let it touch you, but if you believe even for a moment that Luna ma-")

("Princess Celestia, you're overreacting! What if you're just blowing things out of proportion?!?")

Celestia slowed her wingbeats as she listened to her student. This allowed her guards to catch up to her, albeit just barely.

("Maybe I'M wrong and you can only communicate one way through it. Maybe it's a misunderstanding. Maybe Princess Luna DID end up falling asleep after all the things she’s been doing to help us. She’s been dealing with situations non-stop, both Ponyville’s recovery and safety, Edgar’s panic attack, and dealing with nightmares the night before. There are too many variables to go in blazing!")

("Twilight, this is not the time to be indecisive. Do you not remember everything I told you about last night?!? I won't lose any of you to him.")

("...Yes. You promised to trust me!")

Celestia halted in her tracks...as did the few guards in her company as they finally found an opportunity to catch their breath from the short sprint they had to perform. They stood at the ready nonetheless for anything that could have happened.

("I know you're scared. I can't begin to understand what you went through, but we don’t know for sure why Luna’s not answering you. We need to keep a clear head about all of this and not jump to the worst possible conclusion. Everything will turn out alright. I know it will. Please just give him a chance.")

Though Princess Celestia’s mind was racing to catch up with all the possibilities running through her mind, Twilight offered a moment of respite. Perhaps it was Twilight’s belief in the inherent good in others, or the fact that everything seemed to work out alright in the end of her adventures. She is a good judge of character. If she believes there is good in Edgar, perhaps...

(“...You're right, Twilight. I'm sorry...and thank you. I think I needed that, and I will be mindful of your words as I check in on Luna. I trust your judgment...”)

She turned back toward the three guards catching their breath. There was a short white Earth Pony with a large satchel on his side, a familiar orange Pegasus that Twilight orbited around for a short time, and a fairly large unicorn of little distinguishing characteristics apart from the fact that he hardly seemed winded like the other two.

She thought for a few moments, then gave a new order for her guards. "Would you three kindly deliver... my halberd back to my room for safe keeping?" Celestia struggled at first to get that command out, but she soon let her golden halberd gently float in place in front of the now-confused guards.

"...Your majesty?" Larger unicorn questioned, whom Celestia recognized as Flash Bang, Private First Class according to his insignia.

"I understand you may have reservations, but I may be acting rashly in my haste." She explained to placate them. Celestia was still worried and her instincts were telling her it was a bad idea to leave her halberd back at her room...but she trusts Twilight. She has to. "I think it would be best if I sent my halberd back to my room."

"So he's not dangerous?" The Orange Pegasus, Private First Class known as Flash Sentry asked. "I mean, he helped us, but he was able to fight back an army with a stick...And he has nipples!" Flash Bang nudged the wind right out of Flash Sentry with a well-placed hoof to his side. "Ow...your majesty." one Flash grunted as both Flashes bowed their heads toward Celestia.

Had the situation been different, Celestia might have had a hard time keeping a straight face. She let out a sigh.

"I still believe him to be. I warned the royal family to take extreme caution when dealing with him, but I can't let my fears dictate my actions. After the events from yesterday, it will send the wrong message if I appear before him armed." Celestia explained. "I trust them, both my sister and my student. They can take care of themselves."

"...But you're still worried about them, aren't you?" A noble voice spoke out. The inflections were a surprise to be sure, but a welcome one when she considered the voices of some of the more conceited politicians who try to brown-nose her and her sister. "Do you want us to stay close with it?"

Celestia turned to the little Earth Pony that the voice came from. He was certainly smaller than the average guard, standing at about a hoof shorter than his partners, and not quite as bulky as you would expect with an average Earth Pony. Perhaps he was sickly in his youth? Wait, if this satcheled guard is Private Khan, then he isn't quite an earth pony now is he? He did have a strange name in her opinion, but she has heard of the word "Khan" from her trip to Yakyakistan before. It means "ruler" or "conqueror" in their language.

"Am I that obvious?" Celestia asked. "I am, because just because I don't trust him doesn't mean that I don't trust those close to me. I have no reason to appear before him as his judge if he hasn't proven himself to be a threat yet."

"...With all due respect to your majesty, nopony needs a reason to protect their family." Private Khan said. "If you think they might be in danger, you need to be there for them by any means necessary."

Celestia's ears perked up as she was admittedly taken aback by Khan's wisdom. She admired his candor. She doesn't mind questions or challenges to authority, so long as it comes with good intentions. One could learn a great deal from their subordinates if you let them speak their mind, and many of her fellow royals adopted this practice as well after enough time with their guards.

"Are you talking back, Private?" Flash Bang chastised the blue-haired stallion.

That being said, it doesn't seem proper to those that venerate the royal family as much as her little ponies do.

"It is quite alright, Private Flash." Celestia waved off with a smile before turning back to Private Little Khan. "I appreciate your thoughts, and I am sorry for your loss, Private Khan. Private Heavy Spoon was brave, and though you may not have been related, some may find the blood of the covenant thicker than the water of the womb. Friendships can endure even until the next life, and a goodbye one day does not mean goodbye forever. You will see them again one day." Private Khan's face was stoic, but he bowed his head gratefully at Celestia's words. Celestia then eased up on her own magic, letting Flash Bang's magic take hold of it as she addressed the trio. "I would still like you to take my halberd back to my room regardless...but it can be heavy. Perhaps you should take your time on your way there. Take a few breaks to make sure you are ready and in tip-top shape, no?"

After a few moments, the guards nodded slowly, understanding the new order that she just gave under that suggestion. All three saluted before turning about face and marching back to her room in what others would consider a leisurely pace.

Celestia turned back toward the direction of the room where the Human was being kept...

Celestia trusts and respects Twilight's judgment.

She does. She really does...at least that is what she kept telling herself.

For her, the short trot through these corridors may as well have been a marathon. No matter how short of a distance she was from 𝖍𝖎𝖘 room now, she had a nagging voice in the back of her head that just wouldn't go away.

One that keeps telling her that something terrible happened, and that she was too late to stop it...
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(I beg of you...be safe Luna.)

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Edgar's P.O.V Twilight's castle Morning, before Celestia's first light

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I slowly started to stir awaked from my slumber, but it felt like I was struggling against a current of warm sand. My mind was groggy and slow to pick up, and it took me a moment or two to start remembering where I was. As I slowly started to come to, I realized a few things. One of which was that I was still completely nude except for my shoes and socks. Feels so weird.

Two, I noticed I was having to work a bit harder to breathe as if something was pressing down on my chest...rocking against my waist. Something was caressing a tender spot on my shoulder blade until it suddenly stopped. Suddenly, that something else brushed against it and made a smacking sound as something else wet and moist tightly massaged my... penis?

I shivered involuntarily as the hair on my hairs raised, but I weirdly enough didn't feel freaked out. I had a hard time feeling anything but tranquil with these sensations. I started to realize that the hair-raising sensation was not out of fear...but of pleasure. Of the pressure I was feeling building up at my waist.

I tried to sit up, but I was stopped when I felt the creature shift their weight. The creature resting atop me lifted their head from the side of my shoulder. The sudden cool sensation across the area where their lips were caused a shiver to run down my spine and goosebumps formed all over me. That cold feeling only seemed to magnify as she turned toward me from their position. My half-lidded eyes shot open as the image before me was one of beauty and majesty all rolled into one. It took a second for my eyes to start adjusting to the muted blue hue of my room as the morning sun’s glow was just under the horizon. I found myself staring at a slender Alicorn with piercing eyes as blue as sapphire, and a deep bluish purple mane. It was messy and tousled, and as my gaze met hers I felt my heart jump slightly.

"L-Lun-...wha-s?" I slurred as she started to look less blurry to me. Princess Luna had a mischievous face that was dusted with lust and excitement. Her lower body was still lightly rocking on top of mine...IS SHE RIDING MY DICK?!? My brain immediately came out of its grogginess to comprehend the situation. "Wh-wh-what's-?"

"Shhhh...." Luna hushed as she licked her lips, letting them curl upward in a lioness's smile as she studied me like I was her prey. Seeing that look momentarily shut out any questions I had. "Thou can sense it? The bliss that is approaching? Coming for thee?" The way she's talking...it was like she was trying to coax me awake. It was almost hypnotic, and it momentarily made me forget the sensation near my waist...the one that meant that I was seconds away from orgasm!

I felt her hooves slide from my chest to catch my shoulders, and I did not get even a second of preparation before she suddenly picked up her tempo and started moving her hips against mine faster while using me as an anchor. She leaned over me and moved her head close to mine. She stared straight into my eyes and I found myself losing the ability to think about anything but her as she locked her half-lidded gaze with me. Her expression was unwavering in its intensity, her mouth was open just barely as her pursed lips parted slightly to let out soft moans and pants that sounded more like whimpers or coos. Like she was pacing her breathing.

Time was slowing down for me as my eyes started to slowly roll back. One of my hands went to her muscle and I squeezed the soft, pliable muscle between my fingers on reflex. The other arm wrapped around Luna's back to hug and squeeze her closer to me as I tried to hold on. None of which offered substantial resistance to Luna's movements, and Luna sped up even more as now she had me to balance her.

I could feel myself getting closer and closer to my end and Luna was not slowing down. I don't want to stop, but I'm not sure if I can keep this up much longer. Her tail is flicking against my leg, and it's tickling me. My hips are starting to buck, and my back is starting to arch as the pressure keeps building and building. I let out a soft groan and gritted my teeth and tensed up to try and stop myself on instinct.

But Luna had other ideas...and leaned in to whisper in my ear.

"Don't fight it, embrace it...I want you to cum...riiiight..." Princess Luna commanded huskily as suddenly let her flank drop on my lap and let herself squeeze around my hilted girth as she let out a moan"...~Now~!"

"LunA-MMMMMMM?!?" I tried to call out and ask her what was going on but she suddenly pressed her mouth to mine and her tongue slid its way into my mouth and tickled my own, silencing me. My hands wrapped around her tighter and squeezed her harder as I let out a groan into her mouth. I could only grunt and growl as I finally reached my peak.

Oh fuck...

Fuck!

FUCK!

Before I knew it was happening, the dam burst and thick spurts of cum found its way into the warm tight confines Luna's depths. I felt my balls flexed as I arched my hips upwards against her, pushing up against and lifting Luna's rump against my bucks. With every spurt the sensation only intensified and I squeezed my eyes shut as I tried to bear this sneak attack. I could feel some of my fluids trickle out from our combined sexual organs and down my testicles and onto the sheets underneath us.

As valiant as my efforts may have been, the muscles in my legs and core gave out as I collapsed into a panting mess. Princess Luna broke the kiss and let out a loud squeal as she climaxed as well. A shudder went from her tail up throughout her body and I could feel her insides still clamped and squeezing every last drop of cum from my now-exhausted penis. Her back leg frantically kicked out a few times and I heard her wings beat and flare out before the kicking suddenly slow to a stop and going slack. Her inner muscles relaxed their vice-like grip, and as it did so, I finally started to become aware of just how hard it had been squeezing me.

"Lu-...Holy shit..." I managed to speak through my gasps for air as I started to relax my body. My words were more like breathy sighs than actual words. My voice cracked a bit at the end, thanks to coming down from such a strong orgasm. "W-what the hell, Luna?" I opened my eyes and felt my heart beating so hard that my vision got blurry and my limbs felt a little numb. I spent the next few seconds trying to catch my breath and during that time, Edgar was not in the building. When I finally started to come back down from this incredible feeling, I saw that the Princess sitting on top of me had a soft, albeit dopey smile as she looked down upon me. Despite having an orgasm right after me, she seems to have recovered faster than me as she got a hold of a wine glass full of a clear liquid when I wasn't looking. Probably while I was busy trying to come back to planet Earth.

"Welcome to the new day," She huffed out. "...My Morning Star." Princess Luna chuckled. Her voice sounded labored and husky with a dreamlike rhythm yet her half-lidded eyes stared into mine with a mixture of warmth and playfulness. I couldn't tell if she was just waking up, or if she was trying to look a seductive. "Did thou enjoy our surprise?" She hummed out as she stretched her wings out as far as they could go before retracting them back to her body and laying further onto me. She was resting on top of me with her hind legs at the side of my waist and her free foreleg perched on my shoulder kind of like how they were last night...Oh shit...last night. "You were hard this morning, but you're also a heavy sleeper. We had suspicions that you still needed tending to from her venom, but we thought thou should be awake for thy climax. We had done our best to keep thee teetering on the edge for some time..." She purred out. "We must say that was...quite the enjoyable morning for us as well. You make a wonderful pillow~" She sighed out in contentment.

As I started to realize what just happened and where I was, my head jerked around to take in my surroundings. I looked over the state of the freshly stained bed we were laying in and the orgasmic feelings I experienced. The wet sensations on my neck and my groin, and from their familiarity, memories of the night suddenly rushed into my head. Her helping me with Telsona's venom by...us having a lot of sex.

"Oooooh...Heeeey Luna...?" I tried to smoothly talk, but it came out more like a hoarse croak as my mouth was parched and my throat dry. She didn't seem to have trouble understanding me though, and she held out the wine glass toward me. However, as I reached for it she pulled it back at the last moment with a small smile.

"Thou may still be a bit groggy. Pray thee, allow us..." Luna offered softly, letting a hoof hook behind the back of my head as she tilted mine up. All the while, she lifted the cup to my lips before tipping it carefully and letting it slowly pour out. It was water, and as soon as it touched and wet my parched lips and dry throat, I found myself gulping it down greedily as I suddenly realized just how dehydrated I really was. I could feel some of the water from the glass trickle down from my lips and onto my chin before it trailed down my neck. The Pampering Princess's eyes darted down there for a moment, and soon her head followed suit as she started licking up the trail of water from my chin that fell there. I flinched and my eyes shot open in surprise when she lifted her head back up. "Is something the matter, Sir Edgar? You still seem tense."

Why yes. Yes there is! I am INSIDE you right now!

"No. No, nothing's wrong Luna. It's just that...Sex is a hell of a way to wake someone up in the morning?" I deflected. I did my absolute best to not make eye contact, and when I did, it was brief as I kept looking around for any escape route or distraction from this situation.

"We'd say it's much better than a cup of coffee, no?" She winked, and after setting the cup aside on my nightstand, she turned to look over to my balcony window. The sun wasn't out yet, but the dark blue hues of early morning were starting to turn to a lighter shade to show the sun was on its way. "Are you feeling better?"

Just gotta play it cool. So what if you woke up with a millennia-old fictional cosmic horse sitting on your wiener? A fictional cosmic night goddess that saved your life by absolutely rocking your world last night. One that frenched you, made you cum hard, and proved that she wasn't a hallucination by still being here and doing her damnedest to give you positively obscene thoughts. No big deal. Nope. Nooooooo sir.

...

Oh who am I fucking kidding? We just had sex again...AGAIN!!! I can't believe I have to use the word "again" because we just had sex last night! I had sex with a Pony Princess from Hasbro!

...

...No, that was more than sex. "Sex" isn't a good word. We 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲𝑬𝑫 last night! I FUCKED A BIG BLUEBERRY ALICORN!

...

...No, THAT'S not even a good description for what happened.

...

"We...made...Love?" I thought to myself, and those crazy words echoed in my head like an alarm bell.

Or...more like a chime or a melody. This music keeps coming in at the perfect times...doesn't it?

The way Luna moved...the sounds she made. That had to be more to it than just "sex". I'm not even sure I'm right or what I'm supposed to feel about this, but that's what my body was telling me at least. I mean, she didn't just try wringing me out like a wet towel or just rub her hooves on my junk until I was done. From how sensitive I felt last night, she could have easily got the job done like that. Even still, she didn't treat me like some kind of wild animal or like it was a chore for her to save me. I made love with Princess Luna from My Little Pony, and I started to feel stressed after thinking more and more about it.

I even almost told her that I loved her last night. What the heck was I thinking? Was that just an emotional overload or out of gratitude? Was it the venom? Am I just acting like a virgin? Rumors say virgins are clingy, but I'm not clingy about things, let alone for a "pony". She's not a human, so it had to be the venom, right? I was drugged and I ended up fucking a horse. I'm not attracted to a pony damn it! I'm not that much of a brony, Damn It! She's a pony DAMN IT! SHE'S-...She's...

No. She's amazing...

Not just at the whole "sex" thing, but she was an amazing per-no, an amazing pony? It doesn't matter. She did everything she could to make me feel special, didn't she?

They tried making her complex in the show, but there was only so much they could do with however many minutes or hours of screen time she actually had. She wasn't really a two-dimensional character even in the show, and she certainly wasn't now. Princess Luna was here and real. It didn't help in the slightest that she was already one of my favorites ponies in the show but it's like she simultaneously was and wasn't even trying to win my heart over the moment we met.

She and every other pony I met seem to have their own personalities or egos, but Luna seems different somehow. I don't know what it is, but she's every bit as adorable as she was on the show and yet there appeared to be so much more underneath.

From the complicated cocktail she made me last night, her positively glowing eyes as I ripped off Christopher Nolan's movies. She doesn't even really know me, but still gave one hundred percent of her attention when it came to me? She even did her best to try and make me as comfortable as possible when we actually did The Deed. She had no obligation to save me, especially with how she had to do it. However, even if I was different from her, even if we just met a short time ago, she wasn't disgusted for actually doing it with me.

She was even patient with me. She took the reins(no pun intended), and taught me what made her feel good while making my first time heavenly. It was like a dream come true. I'm almost wishing that we could do it all again, but with what I know now so that I can make her feel as special as I felt.

...Fuck, stop that Edgar. You're doing that thing again where you start to imagine a married life with a chick right after meeting them. Luna is clearly not that special if you'd do that for the cashier at King Soopers or the one chick that you faux-slapped during your dentist audition for that Little Shop of Horrors play a few years back.

It has to be too good to be true. How do I know I am not just having a vivid hallucination, or if I've not been high on shrooms and LSD for the past few days or stuck in a coma? What if I'd be making a mistake by going back? I mean I have to go back. My friends and family are waiting for me, but it’s like I somehow know in the back of my mind it’d be the wrong choice.

Luna interrupted my almost-psychological breakdown by leaning lean over and lightly kissing my forehead. She left another on my cheek bone as she started moving lower before stopping and leaving a lingering peck on my lips. It wasn't a kiss of steamy passion like last night but this was still...nice. it wasn't sexual like last night, but it still felt intimate all the same.

My inner monologue, the voice that kept repeating all my doubts went silent and I relaxed and melted into the kiss.

We stayed like this for some time longer, just slowly kissing each other. I was kissing her back like we were speaking a language only we knew. Like she was telling me that whatever was wrong, everything is going to be okay, and that I was telling her that I believed her.

She pulled away eventually, and I could taste her breath as she slowly pulled away. She still had that hint of licorice...

"You're quiet." She asked, staring down at me, the worry evident in her voice. "We hope thou had not suffered any more night terrors. You seem to have much on your mind."

"...No, I slept like a baby." I don't even think I dreamed apart from when I woke up from that nightmare, but I think I'm okay with that. I don't think my dreams could have gotten any wilder than last night anyway. Luna looked relieved as she brushed her hair away from her eyes. "Did you, um...did you get enough sleep? I hope you weren't waiting on me to wake up." I asked her back.

I knew it was rude to just stare at her, but I couldn't stop for some reason. I was in shock at how beautiful she seemed in this lighting. The room was filled with the soft morning light of the sun coming through the balcony door, and she was positively glowing. She looked down at me with those big baby-blue eyes. They had an almost dreamlike quality to them.

"Our rest was short, and it was to be expected. We will need to rest longer once we retire to our chambers, but we need not dwell upon such a trifle detail." She explained casually, as her ears flicked. "We shall remain here with you for now, but luckily we can now enjoy this ambiance thou art setting..." She mentioned, commenting on the music in the background. I guess it does have something to do with me.

"So you think I'm really doing this magic music stuff?" I asked, and she nodded.

"Not intentionally." She clarified. "Though we noticed it may have to do mostly with thine mood, and in part ours..."

"Mood?" I asked. "What do you mean?"

"Take now as an example: 'Tis a new morning. Our sister's sun shall bring about the light of a new day, and you are now safe. You feel at ease, we hope?" Luna asked. Well, I feel more than that. When I nodded, Luna continued. "The feeling is mutual. We enjoy thy company."

"Crazy...and how do I turn this off?" I asked, thinking back to that almost creepy display back when those guards heard that one song from the Mulan section of the CD a few days ago.

Would rather not see that again if I could help it.

"It's not so much 'on' as it is 'present'. Whether or not it makes itself known is based on whether or not there is an abundance of Harmony, Disharmony, or both. You are a "neither", so Harmony and Disharmony shall constantly chase each other around thee to fill a void that can't be filled. There is no "turning it off"." Luna chuckled. "We suspect it shall always be present for thee, though it may be too quiet for us to notice at times."

"Right...and you've just been awake...making out with my neck and getting it on to the background music of mysterious ghost albums?" I asked jokingly. A budding tint of blush that appeared on her muzzle, yet she didn't look away from me this time. I let out a sigh.

I guess I shouldn't give her too much of a hard time. Maybe it was a sort of apology? She was kissing the same spot that she bit down on last night. In fact, it felt like it was the exact same spot that Telsona did, but even if it felt sore I think I'd still prefer Luna's bitemark over Telsona's.

Just a better memory, I guess.

"Indeed, and more. We admit that since we awoke earlier, we simply spent time watching thee. You like to make noises in your sleep and you kept us in suspense as to whether or not you were waking up. Thine little friend had awoken first, and we would not waste such opportunities." Luna said before leaning back down and rubbing my nose with hers, giving me an eskimo-kiss. The tint of a blush became slightly darker in shade. "Hopefully now, you are finally free of the venom that has plagued thee such. 'Twas quite potent to grant thee such vigor after all we've done together." She purred out.

"I still needed help?" I blushed in amazement, getting a nod from her. "...so it wasn't just morning wood?" I asked, prompting Luna to lift her head from me and offer a perplexed look. "Oh, uh it means having boner in the morning. Like when I start to wake up." I explained bashfully.

"...And that is normal for stallions in your world?" She asked, genuinely intrigued as I nodded in affirmation. "That sounds quite painful if not remedied. Does this not impede your ability to ready yourself for the coming day?"

"Yes...and no?" I answered slowly. Never thought I'd have to explain that to a girl, let alone a magical pony. This was still weird to talk about with her. It shouldn't be awkward, considering that I literally just nutted inside her. Multiple times, now. "I mean, if we really need to do stuff that day, then it won't really bother us. Most of the time, just goes down by itself. Is it not a thing here?" I asked back, noticing that she had since started to shift around on top of me.

Luna chucked quietly.

"~You rise with the sun~... Tia would find that humorous." She started to quiet as her face and her brow started to furrow. "No. Most of the time, Stallions start to get into the mood when they sense that a mare is in need. There are rare instances where the stallion is in need, but most are too well taken care of in their herds for this to happen. We thought that we should have helped thee as we had done last night, but it seems we had made a mistake in assuming you were still in need of tending." I felt a small twinge at my heart seeing a glint of guilt across her eyes and a sad smile across her muzzle. She looked adorable right now, and it didn't help the conflicting feelings inside of me. "We hope that we have not overstepped."

Nope. Time to nip that in the bud.

"Nooooooo-nonono. It was great Luna. Amazing really! Awesome way to start my day." I reassured her. I didn't want her to think she did something wrong. She was doing it to help me after all, and it was fantastic. I mean, after what we did last night, that was nothing. "Ten outta ten, "would cum again"?" I asked with the cheesiest smile I could give.

If you are unsure about a joke, use a cheesy smile. If the joke was bad, people will think it was on purpose. It works every time...except it didn't look like it worked this time.

"I hope you understand we did not intend to use you as such, but I should have been more mindful." She said softly. "Thou art safe now, but it would have appeared quite damning if anypony walked in on what I was doing." Her eyes looked away, still looking ashamed. Luna's expression looked serious and her eyes were distant... as if she was lost in thought.

I guess it probably would have looked a bit rape-y when she puts it like that, but it's not like I minded or anything. I could explain that it was a misunderstanding.

Speaking of which, I should really clarify how things work here with Twilight and Celestia to avoid some of those. Last thing I want is any more of them due to some assumptions I keep making based on both the show and some of the fanfiction that I used to read.

"...Right." I said awkwardly, as we found ourselves back to staring at each other in awkward silence... awkwardly. "...Hey Luna? About last night."

"Yes, Sir Edgar?" Luna replied in a gentle tone. It seemed like she was waiting for me to start talking again. Like she could tell that I still had some things to get off my chest.

"What was it for you?" I asked. There was a small part of me that told myself I shouldn't ask, and that it would make things weird. Asking that question made me feel like a stereotype of that chick after a one-night stand. They were fun lines to ad-lib during improv, but I'm kicking myself now that I'm in an actual situation where I had to ask that.

"...Hmm." She looked down at me. There was something about that expression that seemed almost somber, but she still gave me a reassuring smile.

"What happened last night and this morning: What did it mean to you?" She opened her mouth to say something, but I quickly added. "I'm just saying I want to make sure we're on the same page about what just happened, and I didn't want to make it weird between us because I feel like I'm walking a minefield when asking this." I think I got the point across with that last sentence. Though I second guessed myself when I saw Luna was about to speak. "I mean, I already think you're one hell of a friend for doing that, bu-"

A hoof found its way over my lips to silence me. I guess that was going to be a thing.

Luna shot me a stern look of annoyance, but there was a playful smile poking at the corners of her face as she shook her head.

"We...felt that you needed our help. We did not know what to expect of your bite and we had to be sure you were taken care of. Although we wish it could have been under more pleasant circumstances, we were honored to be thine first." She breathed out softly as she slid her hoof off my lips and brushed my hair away from my forehead before landing a kiss on it. She soon gave me a sly smile as eyes narrowed. "You were wonderful for thine first, but perhaps...we may look forward to more nights together?" She seemed to ask suggestively, though there was a glimmer of hope in her eye as she asked. "One where we can enjoy ourselves to the fullest, with stakes less dire?"

That didn't sound like she was just flirting. It sounded like she was seriously considering this. Like she was testing the waters.

"R-really?" I stammered.

Luna's eyes widened as if to say yes before she could.

"Of course." She cooed softly, her voice dripping with affection. "In truth, we have other reasons... but they matter little now." Luna leaned in toward her favorite target...my collarbone.

"What matters now...is how we wish to explore thee~" She continued, her voice lowering to a sultry murmur. Her lips brushed lightly against my collarbone as she spoke, sending a shiver down my spine.

"To hear more of those beautiful sounds thou makes~..." The soft tail hanging down between my inner thighs swished back and forth to lightly brush over them. At the same time, she pressed her tongue flat against my neck and let the wet muscle slowly slide up to the hinge of my jaw. My body jerked and I let out a sharp gasp and my body tensed up as my face felt really hot. She moved away from the thin trail of saliva she left to nibble on my ear lobe before whispering huskily. "...To experience more of those wonderful faces thou make on the verge of thine Crescendos~... What face could you be making now, I wonder?" My breath hitched as she spoke, her voice and tone were getting to me. My face felt like it was about to catch on fire at her sweet and salacious nothings.

I was in shock at how forward she was being. I thought she had been flirty with that dirty-talk from last night, but this was on another level. She is hitting every button and plucking every heartstring I have, including those I didn't know I even had until now. It's almost as if she's trying to turn me on again. Luckily, while the spirit is willing, the flesh is weak and spent, otherwise it would have worked.

She pulled back away from my ear and I soon found myself face to face with her again... Slowly creeping on her face was a sultry grin that had a mischievous glint to it as she looked on at what she did to my poor state of mind. "Beautiful...but it's not enough for us. One more thing..." Luna moved her face closer to mine and right when her lips barely touched mine, she whispered. "...Feeling you smile against our lips again would be enough." Luna pressed her lips to mine in a kiss that caught me by surprise even if I was already expecting it. She was so...so warm, and her lips were so soft. I felt her tongue brush against my lips, and without realizing it I had parted my lips to let her tongue in. It didn't feel like I was fighting a losing battle for dominance like last night. It felt more like a slow dance.

I couldn't help myself as I let out a soft moan alongside her as she coaxed me into a slow and passionate kiss. I don't know how long we kissed for, but it felt like it went on forever...and I loved every moment of it. Her lips were so soft and warm, and her tongue felt like heaven as it slowly massaged and danced around my own. She was tasting and teasing me...and she was doing it all without any rush or care. It was amazing. I felt like putty, and she knew I was at her mercy. I just laid there and let her do whatever she wanted, and I was loving every moment of it...I didn't want it to end, but eventually she broke away from me so we could both catch our breaths. She had a triumphant look on her face. "Got it."

Ho...

Lee...

SHIT...

Fuck everything I was saying before about her being a pony. What do I know? NOTHING, that's what! I could care less about Luna being a pony. What even IS a pony but a horse-shaped, magical human. She already had me at magical human, "Horse-shaped" is just a side-grade from a normal human anyway, isn't it? It's easy to overlook, so I'm raising my standards to Pony Princess!

"H-how the hell did you get so good at that?" I huffed at her as I gasped for air, still trying to compose myself.

Luna giggled softly as she gave me another quick peck on the lips.

"It's not like I am some blushing virgin. We've lived for quite some time, and we've had many suitors. " She said matter of factly, almost with some pride? "We are no strangers to the music of the night, and we wouldn't mind showing you more of what we could do. We've been told that we can be quite formidable."

...Oh. I guess I'm not the only one she does this kind of thing with...

I felt my rose-tinted glasses crack, and an imaginary shard poked me in the eye.

"Many?" I murmured, trying to be nonchalant. I tried not to make a face or sound like I was bothered by that. "I hope I wasn't too boring for you last night."

"No. Not at all." Luna quickly answered with a changed tone. She sounded serious, and I turned to see that she looked at me with a worried expression. Her eyes were wide and she looked almost panicked. "You're not jealous, are you?"

"I'm not jealous. It's just that you caught me off-guard." I...okay, that was a lie. I looked away from her and at the ceiling. I couldn't think of anything else to say, and I really didn't feel like thinking about her past partners right now. I still tried to play it cool. Maybe I can change the subject? "Besides, it's not like we're dating, right? You were only here to help me with my bite, so it's cool."

I kinda had a head-canon for how I thought of Princess Luna, but I guess I shouldn't have been surprised. It'd be pretty unrealistic and demanding to expect a thousand-year moon goddess to be a virgin. That's just silly, and her experience made everything better anyway, right? I don't get to be "picky".

"Edgar, please look at us..." Luna whispered softly. A hoof on the crown of my head tilted my gaze back to Luna. The tips of her ears were folded down. "Do not think poorly of our time together. We didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable." Luna pleaded, her ears flicked up a bit as she asked. "Even with you being bit, we wouldn't do this with just anypony. Since our return, you're our first as well."

"...Really?" I asked, surprised.

Luna nodded in sincerity. "Yes. We have been intimate with others before, and it's supposed to be a good thing that we were skilled enough to receive much praise from them all. I'd hope you'd feel excitement and anticipation upon hearing this. Upon hearing that you were receiving my best, but...it seems like much has changed since our banishment. I am sorry this has clearly upset you, and if it makes you feel better those times were in the past before we were banished." Luna paused, looking away as if to deciding if she should keep talking. She turned back to me. "Upon our return, we were regarded with such fear that nopony else dared approach us in such a manner. Truthfully, it has been difficult seeing how ponies that once clamored for our attention go out of their way to avoid us. You didn't fear us, but we don't want you to look upon us differently than yesterday or last night. Please understand..."

"...Oh." I answered dumbly. I didn't know what else to say. It sounded like Luna was lonely, especially after being banished for one thousand years on the moon. Having ponies so scared of you that they don't want to even get close to you after being isolated for so long sounded awful. "I'm sorry for getting weird about it." I sighed out.

"Don't be." Luna responded softly as she leaned in and gave me another kiss on my cheek like the ones she's been peppering me with non-stop. She looked relieved that I wasn't as insulted as I sounded. Honestly, I might have been acting immature about it. "It seems as if we still have to learn about each other's cultures. If it is any comfort to you, we'll refrain from making any references to our past lovers, if you'd wish."

"...I'd feel better about that." I said. "I've guess I just never thought anyone could be so nonchalant about their "experience" while I was naked underneath them before." I admitted with a chuckle. "To be honest, I was thinking in the back of my mind that I wouldn't get this far with anyone anyway."

"What a tragedy that would be... for them." Her relief turned into a sly smile, which suddenly trembled as she started to finally pulled her rump off of my waist. She let out a soft hum that matched mine as she finally released my cock from her sensual grip. My member hit my abdomen and I felt a shiver go through my body from the sudden exposure to air, only for Luna only to trap it between our bodies as she laid herself on me once more. I felt two soft mounds of flesh sandwiching it as her surrounding area was starting to get matted by remainders of this morning. "It was awkward for us at first, as it has been some time since we had partook. However, you were such a gentlecolt. We see you tried very hard to please us and hold on for our sakes. We can't help but be flattered by that. You've done wonders for our self esteem..." Princess Luna leaned back down and cuddled against my chest. She nuzzled into my neck and the warmth of her fur sent goosebumps across my skin...my entire body. She nodded against me, rubbing her chin on my shoulder with a relaxed sigh as her eyes started to flutter and close. "You're a quick learner too. You've pleased us as well...many times last night..."

I stared up at the ceiling as I felt the warm and soft press of her fur. My mind was nearly blank as I was caught off-guard by the intimacy and comfort that she was brought to me with such a simple action. However, I did have that one thing nagging at the back of my mind.

"You're still bothered." Princess Luna murmured. Her voice was as smooth as silk. "Please, speak what is on your mind."

...

Okay Edgar...She passed the ball to you.

Do not.

Make things.

Weirder.

"...Yeah. Did something else happen with us last night?" I asked, not sure how I wanted to go about this. I thought I knew, but it's more like a feeling than anything concrete.

Luna didn't answer immediately, but her eyes shot open to give me this intense stare. She studied me for a few moments. "Else? As in?"

I took a moment to think it over. I nodded before second guessing myself and shaking my head. "This is a crazy situation that I'm having a hard time putting it into words. I know that you helped me last night because you didn't want me to die. You saved my life and still I can't thank you enough...But I can't also I can't help but feel like there was... more to what you did? Like those "Other reasons" you mentioned."

"Such as?" She asked softly. I said her voice was like Silk earlier, but now it's morphing into a Velvet. It was heavier, thicker, and yet seemed just as smooth. It started to give me goosebumps again.

I started to sit up and this time Luna eased up enough to let me do so as she also sat up. I propped myself up on my elbows as I leaned against my bed's headboards. Luna soon followed and took an initiative to claim her seat on my lap once more as her forehooves hung off the headboard on either side of my head. She was still so close to me that I could feel her heartbeat against my bare chest. Her look was almost expectant as she watched me flounder about for my words. Her chin came up to my forehead from this position and she smiled down at me with those big ol' blue eyes and an expression I couldn't read.

"Last night. You said when you were helping me, you weren't doing it because you necessarily liked me that way, but I also remember you were trying to have me fantasize about "Princess Zelda". About her wanting to give herself to her beloved. Was that only really fantasy? Like, was that only to help me feel more comfortable when we...did it?" I asked hesitantly. Luna remained silent with a blank expression and it only made me more nervous.

What the hell is going on with me? Why was I getting so nervous about this? I thought my anxiety was bad last night, even with Luna helping me along. I started to go with the flow without any problems after we got started. Now? It's like the more I wanted to get my questions across. How the fuck do the guys in Rom-Coms do this? How does anyone get this far in a talk like this?

It didn't help that Luna didn't say anything for the longest time. In fact, the Princess of Night had completely tensed up as her lips thinned into a single line...she looked away from me and to the side before turning back to face me, still not saying a word. It was quiet, save for the birds that were now singing outside near the balcony. She opened her mouth as if to speak, then paused for another few seconds.

"...What do you think happened between us last night? What is your real question, Edgar?" Princess Luna asked, staring into my eyes. "What answer do you hope for?"

"I mean, you're still here with me even after you took care of the changeling bite. You've been making out with me off and on since I woke up. Here, look at all of this!" I gestured toward the way her hooves were anchored on either side of me. How she held herself close to me. I don't think these ponies have a concept of a personal bubble, but even this is too intimate to be anything else, right? Especially after last night and earlier this morning and right now? "This doesn't feel like you were just trying to help me anymore. It feels like something more. Am I reading too much into all of this?"

"...Oh." Luna gracefully lifted one of her hooves from the headboard and rested it on the back of my hand, gently tapping it. I lifted my hand from her signal, and she used her hoof to guide it up to her face, resting my palm against her cheek. My heart started to beat harder as she nuzzled into the warmth of my palm, not breaking her eye contact with me as she looked at me with the same lovely orbs from last night. On reflex, I stroked her cheek with my thumb as her same hoof reached out and softly held my own face. "Oh, Edgar...You're still hesitating in asking your real question, aren't you"

"I don't want to make things awkward between us." I spoke quietly. It was just above a whisper. The wing opposite of Luna's side flexed and extended over to to lightly brush and press its primaries against the other side of my cheek. It wasn't as smooth as her hoof, but her feathers felt so soft against my face.

"You aren't. I suspect I know what you wish to ask...and we should be flattered that you would consider it." She cooed as her muzzle hovered mere millimeters from mine. It's almost like she was inching ever closer in slow motion. Her voice sent butterflies down my chest, and as she leaned closer my heart jumped and my brain fired up on overdrive. The heat from her breath on my face and the heat of her body mixing with my own...or maybe that was just me burning up as thoughts went through my mind like a speeding train. The same thoughts came to a grinding halt as she pressed her forehead against mine. I felt her horn's base graze against the top of my head, causing me to wince in surprise from the foreign sensation her lips barely tickled mine. "Our actions are reflections of who we truly are. We can not hide our true selves from you much longer." She lightly shook her head, rubbing it into mine.

The tone of the room took a sudden shift...Luna's voice had a small edge to it despite being so delicate. It sounded like there was a sense of urgency, but also an unwavering calmness. Her eyes never left mine as she stared intently at me. "How are you certain you are not making a mistake? There's a reason that ponies still fear us. You have only seen our best, yet none of our worst. Should a time come where you witness it, we can be even more frightening than our sister. I can be cunningly cruel, and I am afraid that I may hurt you in ways you have not though possible..."

I leaned away from her as much as I could with my back against the headboard to take a good look at her. She still smiled, but it looked sad...like she was trying to talk me out of asking. Like she was still holding herself responsible for her past actions.

I think it finally started to click with me. There was more to her trying to "be my Zelda" last night. She didn't just think I saw her as an animal. She still thinks of herself as a monster. A Nightmare. She wanted to be anyone but Luna for me...

"...That's a risk I'm willing to take. If anything happens, I won't blame you. I promise." I said, trying to reassure her. Princess Luna held up a hoof and I thought for a moment she was going to silence me once more. So I grabbed it and held it with a soft but firm grip. Luna didn't pull away. "Luna, I thought I was clear yesterday. If this is about your past, back when you were Nightmare Moon, I don't care. You're such an amazing pony and quite easily one of my favorite Princesses, and when I said those things last night...I meant every single word. You even stood up to Celestia when she went overboard and "tried to scare me"." I air-quoted. "You've done so much for me already and saved my life so many times already. I don't know how I can ever pay you back."

"Edgar, you don't kn-" Luna tried to interrupt me, but words kept tumbling out of my mouth like a waterfall, or like I was a broken dam and I couldn't hold it back anymore. And the more I talked, the more confident I felt about everything I was saying.

"So what if you think you can be complicated? You're not as bad as you're making yourself out to me. Heck, you're probably the best thing about this place so far, and I know there's a lot of good things here. I couldn't imagine a place like Equestria could actually exist. It's like "Hyrule". Remember? From last night? Only Hyrule isn't real." I could feel the butterflies in my chest start to swarm and my heart was racing. "This feels real to me. You feel real to me. You feel like...it feels like we're more than just friends, you know?" It was as if my body was preparing for something...or bracing for impact. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, but there was a look on her face that was more intense than anything I had seen before. Her eyes looked determined, yet there was a hint of something else in that expression. It was as if she was looking for something in me. I couldn't help but wonder if she found what she was looking for. "...Are we more than friends now?"

I waited a moment for her answer.

Then two...

Then five…

I'm not getting anything from her...She wasn't smiling anymore.

She still caressed my face, but it seemed like she was easing that feeling of me making a fool of myself in front of her. The longer Luna went without speaking, the hotter I felt, and the more I wanted to shrink away or just melt into a puddle and just die.

"...I made things weird, didn't I? I'm sorry Luna." I clearly exaggerated what went on between us, and the sinking feeling in my gut told me that it was by a mile. "I mean, you've only known me for a couple of days. I don't really know why I thought throwing this bombshell at you at the last minute would be a good idea. We should just pretend I never said anything."

"You didn't... Thank you for your honesty." Princess Luna paused before swallowing. "We want your trust and for you to know that we are your friend, but you are mistaken about us..."

"But Lun-" She held up a hoof, silencing that thought before she slowly let it fall back to the bite marks on my shoulder. She stayed quiet before gently shaking her head with the smallest beginnings of tears in her eyes. "...So there's nothing else between us besides us being friends?" I asked quietly, not sure if I really wanted the answer. "What's with all of this then?" I gestured generally at the two of us. "You just said that you wanted more of this, didn't you?"

Regardless of what Luna was saying, she was still pressing herself against me. She still asked if we could do this more.

She was still so close to me.

She was still leaning forward slowly before suddenly pressing her soft lips against mine once more...

Now I'm lost. Is that a "yes" or "no"?

I tried to lean away from her again to try and get a definitive answer, but she held my face with her hoof and kept me there as we kissed. I don't think I mind though. It was soft, and tender, and she broke away sooner than I wanted. The room seemed to brighten as the sun rose higher outside my balcony window, and as I got a better look at her...I saw she was crying now?

"Luna?" I asked, but she didn't respond as she stared at me, a small trail drew itself down her cheek's fur. "Luna, what's wrong?"

Luna whispered against my lips. "The feelings you may have for us, and the feelings we may have for thee..." She kissed me again, though as she did I felt wet drops on my face. "What if they are but a fantasy...A beautiful lie?" She whispered to me, this time moving to brush her lips like a gentle breeze across my cheek where her tears landed. "It was...nice to forget about things for a while, but I know why I helped you in the first place. You must accept that I should simply be a mare you can trust. Nothing more."

"Well what if it's not a lie?" I asked. She looks and acts like she wants to give it a chance too, so why won't she? "I do trust you. Can't you give it a little more thought?"

"...Couldn't you?" Luna appeared to give it some thought before moving to my ear and gently whispering to it. "Suppose our answer could be what you hope for. Suppose you could bear us at our worst. If there was even a chance for something more between us, wouldst thou seize upon this? Even if it would mean staying here in Equestria and making a life here?"

"I mean, I know I promised Celestia that I would, since it was the only way she said she would work on a way to get home, but if I-"

"Could you truly make such a choice, even if it means leaving your loved ones behind?" Luna asked. "There are those you'll miss, are there not?"

I felt like a deer caught in headlights.

"...Yeah, they've probably noticed me missing by now..."

I'm tried not to think about it too much. I want to go back, I do. I've only been here a few days, but it's been some of the craziest, scariest, days I've ever had. But they've also been some of the most incredible days of my life. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. This is a type of fantasy that I've been literally dreaming about, but I can't just up and give up my life back home for it. Even if I get back, it's not like I can tell them about anything that happened here, could I? What would I even say? "Help, I was isekai-ed into a cartoon?"? If I go back, it'd be like everything that happened so far never happened. It'd be no different than me just imagining everything. I don't even have a way of explaining how or why I've been missing here for a few days, and...

Wait. One...Two...Shit. Today's my High School Graduation.

I was supposed to be there for it sometime in the afternoon in that stupid robe and hat. Shake people's hands and smile for a picture before taking my diploma. My Mom even had a banquet reservation set up for myself and some of my friends at her restaurant my Mom's Restaurant with a few other friends from my Theatre club. I can kiss that party goodbye, but family back home are still waiting for any signs that I might turn up. There's no way they would see a car crash or a body if both the car and my body is here, so I'm probably just "missing" right now. I'm okay, but they still don't know that. It's not fair to them...

...still

"You're sweet, but you can't outright say it yet, can you?" Luna said softly, interrupting my train of thought. She moved her hoof away from my face and pulled back to wipe her eyes and recompose herself. Rather than rest her hooves on the headboards like before, I felt her hang them on either side of my shoulders. "I do think you can find happiness here. I am sure your family would want happiness for you wherever you go...but to rush into a difficult decision like this so swiftly..." Luna shook her head.

"...So what if I stayed?" I asked, causing Luna to perk up.

"Excuse us?" Luna asked with surprise.

"Hy-hypothetically, what if I stayed here in Equestria? At least for a little while to see?" I asked. "Everything you're saying and doing right now is telling me that you might actually want something more. A few minutes ago, you were talking more about spending more nights together. It sounds like you want to be more than friends, and the main hang-up is whether or not I decide to leave. So what would happen if I don't?"

I know I'm sounding childish. Selfish even, but this was a chance to have something more than just a fantasy. Something real that I didn't have to act out or pretend. I've never felt anything like this before, and even though I've only known her for a few days, there's something about Luna and the others that just makes me feel so warm. It'd be hard on its own right to say goodbye to that, but I'm literally in Equestria. This is a place where magic is real, and friendship is everything. This is a land of wonder, adventure, and magic! It's a dream come true, and I don't know if I want to give it up just yet.

To go back and be a boring and mundane person after what I experienced in such a short time. So what if I was closer to dying than I'd ever been(barring that one time I brought the cookie bucket to the Minnesota state fair's unlimited milk bar)? I never felt so alive right now. These ponies are alive, and maybe they could be better off if I stayed too! Especially with some of the friendship problems that they had during the show. Easy problems to solve anyway.

"...That would depend on you and what you wish for." She answered simply.

"That answer is vague. What about you? Would you want to give this a shot?" I asked her. I know I was probably pressing this too much, but I had to know.

Princess Luna remained quiet as she looked off to the side, not meeting my gaze as she considered my question. Her lips became thinner as she pursed them, and I could hear her breathe in deep before exhaling through her nostrils and slowly shook her head. "We wish for you to be happy here. That is our honest answer, Edgar." Princess Luna replied, leaning forward and kissing my forehead once more. "But if you are asking if I would want more between us if you stayed...then-"

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

Before she could utter another word, there was a loud knocking outside of our room, sounding more like a very weak attempt to break down the door than a polite announcement. Our eyes turned toward the doorway, and they did not care to be quiet if I could hear them through the door and the two glass doors in front of them.

The music from before faded suddenly upon the knocks and were instead replaced with something quieter.

"Too soon...they're too early." Princess Luna whispered harshly, rubbing her eyes before suddenly turning back to me with a stern look. Her gaze frantically looked between my eyes and my shoulder before whispering urgently. "Do you trust us?" Luna asked urgently, turning back to look at me after listening to the pairs of heavy hooves echo and clack in the crystalline castle hallways right outside our door.

"Wha-?!?" I tried to ask, caught completely off-guard from what she just said and even more so about what was happening right now as she took the hoof against my cheek and slide it over my mouth at the speed of FUCK to silence me.

"Lower thine voice...Us. Me! Are these feelings true? Do you trust us?" Luna asked once again a hush, taking her hoof off my mouth. There was an intensity behind her eyes that caused me to stop wasting time. She really did seem to need to hear an answer right away, and for whatever reason it caused the hair on my arms to raise up. I felt especially uneasy and more aware of every little sound echoing through the hallway.

"Yea-yeah I do! Why?" I tried matching her volume. The tension in the room seemed to suddenly spike. It was like I could almost see a glimmer of what appeared to be panic within those baby blue spheres.

"Then bite me....Hard. Enough to leave a mark, or draw blood if thou must."

My jaw dropped.

Princess Luna was giving me an almost desperate look. She was completely serious from what I could see. Her baby blue eyes were filled with urgency as she seemed to look past me as if she was counting down in her head...waiting for something. "You fell asleep before you could've done this last night but it must be done now. We can't prove that we are finished otherwise."

"You can't be serious, right?" I asked her, completely taken aback. I had no idea what was happening, or why she'd need a mark left on her. It all felt wrong, but there was something behind her voice that told me I couldn't argue. It didn't stop me from trying though. "What's last night got to do wi-"

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

She didn't respond this time, instead pushing herself off my lap and pressing the part of her chest near her shoulder against my face. Before I knew it, Luna wrapped a foreleg around my neck and kept me there. "Just as I did to thee last night, leave a mark upon us. We can take it." She commanded. When I hesitated, she pulled me in tighter and I got a mouthful of her coat. My jaw ached as I felt her squeeze my face tighter against her. "We know thou art scared, but trust us and BITE!"

I didn't want to hurt her. Not a single cell in my body wanted to actually do what she asked of me, but the desperation in her voice and the fact that she sounded so afraid.

I did as I was told and bit down. I thought I heard her gasp as she tensed up in my arms, but then I remembered her trying to be quiet so I loosened my jaw slightly. At least, I tried before she held herself closer against me and kept a death grip on the back of my neck with her hoof, trying to keep me in place. My jaw started to ache as the grip her forelimb had on my neck only grew, yet I felt another hoof stroke the top of my head as if to encourage me. "Harder! You aren't hurting us, but leaving a mark of passion. We beg of thee!" Princess Luna whisper-yelled desperately. I did the unthinkable and clamped my teeth harder and harder. I felt her tense up as she sucked in a hiss between her teeth.

I started to taste copper and I immediately felt the resistance she had against my head drop to almost nothing. I pulled away from her and I could see that while it was hard to make out any tooth indentations on her fur, there was a ruby droplet where my incisors made their way through. The punctures weren't that deep, but there were a few drops signifying that I definitely drew blood.

She asked for it. I know she asked for it, but I couldn't help but feel sick at seeing it. How could I do that to her? Why did I do that? What kind of "mark of passion"...

"I'm sorry, Luna. That looks like it hurts...shit, I'm so sorry. I re-" I tried to apologize, but the proverbial coin flip landed on heads.

Rather than the hoof over my mouth silencing me like I was starting to get used to, it was instead a pair of soft warm lips that I couldn't get used to meeting mine. Her eyes were closed in relief as she did it, and though it wasn't by much, it reassured me. She pulled away almost as quickly as she started.

"~Welcome..." I heard her mumble to me before she suddenly opened her eyes. Luna's voice lost its urgency now, and she was actually smiling as looked at the mark I left on her chest, holding a hoof against it."No Edgar. You did wonderfully. It was exactly what we wanted, and you will be okay now." Princess Luna comforted me as if I needed it and not her. "...Listen closely... You've been brave these past few days, and we ask for thine bravery only once more. That you answer any questions she has as you normally would. Answer them as "Edgar". Answer them as honestly as possible, and feel no shame for what we had done together..."

What is Luna being really cryptic right now? Is this about the sex we had? Who's "She"?

"Luna, I don't-" She pressed her forehead against mine, and all I saw were her eyes one more. Her intense stare.

"We know this is bewildering, but trust that even if things may seem scary, that we are your fr-" Luna's words appeared to catch in her throat like they were trying to get out. She pressed her forehead against mine. "I am your friend. Trust in us one last time."

I was absolutely baffled at the entire situation, but before I could get any more clarification on what was going on right now, I heard another muffled rapping on the wooden double doors behind those two glass walls.

Knock

Though this set of knocks were much quieter than the first two sets, the tempo that it came at was jarring and grabbed my attention more so than the other knocks.

Luna has since shifted off and laid at my side rather than resting on top of me. A foreleg and wing rested over my chest, and she was occasionally swapping between looking at the door silently and giving me an occasional glance.

"~Are you awake in there?" A familiar voice came through the door.

.
.
.

That sounds kind of like Princess Celestia.

Chapter Thirteen: History's Refrain ~ the Same Song again...
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Thirteen: History's Refrain ~ the Same Song again...

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Chapter Fourteen: Total Eclipse of the Heart - 1/2
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Fourteen: Total Eclipse of the Heart - 1/2

"We are not punished for our sins, but by them."

— Elbert Hubbard

Steam drifted lazily toward the ceiling, mixing with the soft glow of the room’s light. I sunk further into the soaker tub, letting the heat work its way into my aching muscles. At first, I was worried about how slowly the water was filling, but when I got in, I noticed a slight current. There was a tiny grate hidden off to the side, gently pulling in everything it could, from loose hairs to the dried blood that was uncrusting from my hands as well as my cut. I bet that makes it easier for ponies who have to deal with fur.

Smart design, I guess.

I was as squeaky clean as I could get using the lavender shampoo and the lavender soap bar and the lavender-colored Luffas and the lavender "coat-wash". Thanks to that and a few other things, it didn’t take as long to scrub myself clean as I thought it would. But I didn't think I was quite ready to leave.

Not yet, so I had to try topping up the Jacuzzi/Bath with hot water and just sat there thinking. As it was filling up once more, I saw a basket holding fist-sized "tea-bags" labeled "Lavender Luxury: For Lavender Ladies".

I'm starting to sense a lavender-theme in Twilight's castle.

Never messed with "bath teas" before, but after this morning I think I deserve to feel a little..."fancy", so I nabbed one. Sure enough, it started fizzing after I dropped it in, coating the water in a mist of purple bubbles and tinting the bathwater a soft purple. Should I have dropped it in before I got in?

Nah...don't worry about that.

Just... float. Be a jellyfish. Majestic, brainless, and smooth. Just vibing in the ripples.

I let my arms drift weightlessly in the water, the quiet hum of the room and the faint sound of the faucet surrounding me. Skimming my fingers along the surface, I watched the ripples spread, slowly. I exhaled a long, deep breath, trying to loosen the tension still coiled in my muscles.

...

"Try to relax." she says.

Yeah, like that's happening.

Anywhere else this Jacuzzi-tub would have felt like paradise—luxury I couldn’t even dream of having in my own home. But I can't appreciate that. Not when my mind kept circling back to everything I’d been through these past few days.

Memories of Celestia trying to kebab me gnawed at the back of my head. One minute I felt like I could get a breather, the next I was inches from getting stomped on by Celestia or dealing with Telsona’s venom. Was that bite really as much of a threat? I felt like shit from it, and Celestia knew enough about it to keep asking about it. Hell, she seemed sorry for me. She tried giving me advice about how I should feel about it, but that didn’t stop her from trying to—

She wasn't supposed to be like that. I hate how she looked at me. I hate how I feel around this Celestia. She wasn’t some Saturday morning cartoon villain. She's real... and she hates me.

.
.
.

The worst part?

The “not knowing”.

In the show, everything was wrapped up neatly in thirty minutes, maybe an hour if they wanted to get dramatic. You knew where everyone stood and you had a bird's eye view. But now I can’t even figure out what the real problem is, let alone how to fix it. There’s this massive force looming over me, and I’m stuck guessing. What’s real? What’s not? What’s next?

Nope. Stop thinking about that right now, Brainless Jellyfish. Jellyfish don't have problems. They just float around until they get eaten by a sea turtle. And you know what? They probably don’t care about that cause they don't have a brain. Be the Stoic Jellyfish.

...

...I shut my eyes to try and push it all out, but somehow she keeps weaseling her way back in.

No...Not Celestia right now.

𝑳𝒖𝒏𝒂...

Even with my eyes closed, I still saw her. Her eyes, her voice, her touch. I loved how she made me feel, but I don't know what I'm supposed to feel about her now. Anger? Shame? Hurt? Gratitude? I’ve felt all of those in the past hour alone, not to mention everything over the past couple of days. But mostly... mostly, I’m just exhausted.

I know she saved me. Hell, I’d probably be dead a few times over if it wasn’t for her. But that doesn’t wipe away what she admitted to doing, even if I don't fully understand it yet. Whatever Luna did, it’s got Celestia convinced she’s cursed now.

Sure, being Luna's so-called “Royal Consort” stopped her from trying to skewer me, but Luna was the one that put me in that spot to begin with. And from the way everyone reacted? Luna crossed some serious lines. Not just with me. Twilight, Celestia, Trixie—

I winced at her name.

Damn it.

I shook the thought away.

Focus. Back to Luna.

Whatever she did, it hit everyone hard. I still don’t know why, or what the point of it all was, but... it wasn’t just me she messed with. It’s like the entire room shifted when everyone realized what she’d done, but why did she do it?

She could’ve let Celestia handle me—make me pay for "having hands" or whatever reason she seems to think I deserved to die for. But why was I put in that position to begin with? If the venom wasn’t a problem, why sleep with me in the first place? I’m not... I’m not special.

I’m not some chosen one or some hero from a storybook. I’m just... me. So what the hell was the point of any of it? What did she gain? Why put me in that position?

Maybe I screwed it all up myself. I lied to her first. I told her I fought off a changeling queen and her entire army with a wooden sword. I mean, technically I wasn’t lying, but it wasn’t exactly some epic duel with Telsona like I made it out to be. It was my car and that 「ＭａｇｉｃＤａｎｃｅ」 they did when “Safety Dance” came on.

I think at the moment, I wanted her to see me as something... more. Is that why she did this? Because I tried to act like some kind of hero, when really I’m just a guy getting by on flukes? Did she see through me? Was all of this her way of testing me? Or worse, punishing me?

What if she thought I actually did everything I said, believed the lie, and then found out it was just me, the Mustang, and some random miracle? They already know about the car—it saved Ponyville—and while it's beaten to hell, I bet they'd have it fixed in no time if they realized what it could do. My keys are still in my still-missing pants...so they don't need me anymore if they still have them.

...Am I still worth keeping around ? What if Celestia’s curse lifts because of it?

Would she let Celestia come back for me?

I dipped my head under the purple bath water to try and drown out the torrent of conflicting emotions swirling inside me. The heat from the water did nothing to soothe the ache in my chest.

I wanted to be mad. I wanted to scream. But I just couldn’t. It'd be quiet since it's underwater, but I couldn’t even manage that.

...

...I still can't get her face out of my head.

Maybe it’s just my dick talking, but even with everything spinning around in my head, I keep coming back to the time we spent together. There was this...this rush when we were with each other—and not just because of the sex. It was the whole thing. The "before" and "after". It was the way she looked at me, like I was something more than I really was, like I mattered to her. Even the few times we actually talked felt... special.

I don't think Luna would let Celestia come for me if they had my car. She kept saying she was my friend. Over and over again. I want to believe her. Damn it, I really do. But a friend wouldn’t do something like that. Right? Not without a good reason. Maybe...Maybe if she told me what she was trying to do, would I go through with it?

My gut instinct is to say "no" out of spite right now, but I don't think I would've done that. Even with what I know and don't know right now. If I'd just known, maybe...

...Does this make me an idiot?

I sat underwater with the current from the water swirling around me along with the thoughts swirling in my mind. I spent too much time trying to put the pieces of what actually happened today back together, but I still ended up with more questions and more missing puzzle pieces... I don't know what to do.

Eventually I had to give up being overdramatic due to my lack of oxygen, so I raised my head above the surface of the water, drawing in a breath just as—

"Hiiiiii..."

"BWHAAAAA!" I jolted upright and back against the edge of the tub, my heart racing as water sloshed over the sides. The sudden voice cut through my thoughts, sending a surge of panic through me. My gaze snapped toward the door, and there stood two figures just beyond the doorway: a tall, white stallion with a blue mane, more dressed than I am with a royal cuff around his neck. Beside him, a pink Alicorn wearing a golden collar-necklace thing, a crown, and a presence that somehow made the lavender-laden bathroom feel even more perfumed. "...Oh my god...Will you ponies stop it with the FRICKIN Jump-scares already?" I wheezed out, trying to catch my breath.

They blinked at me, wide-eyed, but clearly trying not to look as awkward as I felt.

Shining Armor held up his hoof in a placating manner. "Sorry. We didn’t mean to startle you," Shining Armor said quickly, taking a tentative step into the room. "We knocked, but, uh... you didn't answer."

"I was underwater... washing my hair," I managed to say, even though my heart was still racing. "I didn't hear you." I shifted awkwardly in the water, my mind swirling with everything that had been gnawing at me just moments ago. "I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting any visitors."

"It’s alright," Cadance added softly, her eyes full of gentle concern. "We thought it might be good to check on you and introduce ourselves properly. Is... now a bad time?"

I subtly sank lower into the water, feeling a chill run down my spine despite the warmth of the water and the burn my cheeks felt. "I'm naked."

They both looked confused for a second before Shining seemed to remember something as he turned to Cadance. "Oh yeah, the "clothes" thing." He turned back to me with a sheepish grin. "Sorry about that. We don't really wear clothes unless it is like a wedding or a party. If it makes you feel better, we can't see anything under in the bubbles or the water. Uh... the beard's a nice touch, though." He pointed at me, holding back a chuckle.

I blinked and looked down. Sure enough, the purple foam of bubbles had gathered around my chin, forming a foam beard that looked straight out of a historical painting. Great.

"Seriously?" I muttered, rubbing a hand over my face to scrub away the bubbles and embarrassment.

“We’ve got a little time while Twilee’s preoccupied, but she’s probably gonna wanna check on you too,” Shining said. “Do you mind if we hang out here for a bit? We want to start over, you know, try to give each other a better 'First Impression'.”

"You’re kidding, right?" I stared at them. "Meeting me in the bathtub ain't much of a first impression either."

Cadance laughed lightly. "He’s not wrong, Shiny," she said, nudging her husband with her wing. "But honestly, we didn’t mean to intrude. We just wanted to see how you were doing. If this isn’t a good time..."

I sighed. It still felt strange—invasive, even—but their lack of concern over my nudity was strangely disarming. I wasn’t sure if that was a cultural thing, or just them being... well, ponies. At least they didn’t seem like they were here to make things worse.

...It might do some good to talk anyway. I still wasn't sure if I should even trust them, but I know I want to.

“Nah, it’s fine,” I muttered. “‘me-time’ is overrated.” I gestured toward the shower bench along the wall. “Go ahead, make yourselves at home.”

I felt my shoulders relax a little as the two ponies crossed the threshold into the bathroom, Shining Armor shutting the door behind him as they entered. They didn't sit and instead elected to stand. Both of them were clearly trying to remain casual about the situation. True to their word, they didn't seem to care too much about the awkwardness of me being in the tub. Meanwhile, I was still struggling to push down the embarrassment gnawing at the edges of my mind. Definitely still a culture shock, even with the fanfictions talking about situations like this in the back of my mind.

"Thanks. You're really doing us a favor, you know." Shining said,

Cadance shook her head and sighed. "Agreed, they're still talking in the other room, but it was getting heavy in there, so we had to leave a bit early to clear our heads." Cadance continued. "Sooooo, we figured the Hoo-man could use some company too, so we can chat."

“Human,” I corrected instinctively. I mean, at this point I expected it, but it’d be nice to nip it in the bud.

"What?" Both of them asked, tilting their heads in confusion.

"It's pronounced Human."

"He-yeo, man?" Cadance tried saying, drawing out the sound like she was trying to relate to the youth on the streets.

"Human."

"You-man?" Shining asked again, with a confused look on his face. That one felt way too intentional to be a mistake, but I couldn’t tell.

"Closer, but it's still Human...Huuuuue-man. Heee-you-man." I exaggerated it, hoping they’d get it.

“...Hyu-mun?” Cadance squinted, her voice almost like she was guessing in a game of charades.

You know what? Close enough.

“Yeah, sure, that works,” I said, nodding. Cadance’s face lit up, and I swear she let out one of those little squee sounds like you hear in the show. Shining was grinning too, like they’d just won a prize for pronouncing an alien word.

"I can't believe I'm talking to a real-life alien. It's like in my old comics!" Shining Armor muttered to his wife, his voice dropping in excitement but clearly trying to maintain composure. They both turned back to me for a brief moment, their eyes bubbling over with curiosity before turning back to each other.

"We didn't practice for this," Shining added, his voice lowering as if it were a secret.

"Don’t worry, hun. It’s just like when you introduced yourself to the Crystal Ponies," Cadance reassured him with a soft, affectionate smile. She stepped closer, her hooves tapping lightly on the bathroom tiles. There was a kind of grace in how she moved, like every step was part of a dance she’d rehearsed a thousand times. Stopping just in front of me, she lowered her head into a polite bow, her mane cascading down in a way that looked so... effortless. She was like a Disney princess brought to life.

“Alright, Mr. Hyu-man,” she said with a playful grin. “My name is Princess Mi Amore Cadenza of the Crystal Empire. I knoooow it’s a mouthful, so just call me Cadance." Her tone was formal but warm, and her smile never wavered, even as she straightened from her bow. She then leaned over to nuzzle Shining’s cheek with a tenderness that made me feel like I was the one intruding on them and their personal time. Their tails intertwined behind them, almost like it was instinct.

I saw Shining Armor visibly stiffen under the nuzzle. His cheeks turned bright pink under his white coat, and it was impossible not to notice.

“And this is the stallion of my dre—"Cadance noticed too, and her eyes sparkled with that mischievous kind of affection."Awww, you’re blushing again! Just like back then tooooo.” She gave him a harder nuzzle, her eyes twinkling as she leaned into it. “Look at hiiiiim. Isn’t he just the cutest?” Cadance gushed.

She was clearly enjoying this a little too much. The coo in her voice was so playful, but there was no mistaking that she was having the time of her life embarrassing him. And as for Shining? He just stood there, stiff as a board, his face practically glowing at this point. It was... hard not to laugh.

"STOoooOOP! You didn't say you were gonna do that again~!" Shining Armor whined, his voice half-serious, half-pleading, but that smile of his was growing, betraying him. As embarrassed as he was, I could see how much he was into it. And, of course, he eventually caved, nuzzling her back with a lot more sincerity.

"But you make it so hard to resist!" Cadance’s laugh was light and warm as she finally pulled back from him, though their tails stayed intertwined like they were still holding hands or something. She flashed me a conspiratorial wink, clearly enjoying herself. “He’s normally really good at keeping a straight face, so this is a big win for me,” she said, like she was letting me in on some secret joke.

Shining, now resigned to his fate, leaned his head against hers with an exaggerated sigh. “Babe, I’m filing for divorce,” he deadpanned, though there was no hiding the tenderness in his voice.

"You aren't getting rid of me that easily. Have you seen how thick that form can be? We got better things to spend our time doing than filling out that novel," Cadance retorted, her voice sweet, but she had that little grin on her face. The one that told you that she had something up her sleeve, but she wasn’t gonna give it away. "Besides, I'd get half your things."

"You're a princess." Shining shot back, raising an eyebrow. "What, you wanna take half of my nothing while I get half the Crystal castle?"

“Nooo~ I’d take your O&O Minis. Remind me again how much you spent on that King Timberwolf commission?” Cadance batted her eyelashes dramatically, watching Shining squirm at the idea.

“You’ve got me by the tail,” Shining muttered, his grin growing as the two fell deeper into their banter, momentarily forgetting I was even there. “Guess I’ve got no choice but to let you be my ball and chain, but one of these days I swear!”

“One of these days? Shiny, you couldn’t survive a week without me,” Cadance giggled, giving him a playful nudge.

“Situation’s mutual. We both know how long your heat lasts,” Shining shot back with a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows.

In a perfectly executed stratagem, the tables turned as now whatever blush Shining Armor wore had somehow copied itself and made it's way onto Cadance's cheeks.

"~STOoooOOP!" Cadance hissed through gritted teeth, her cheeks burning under her light pink coat. Shining Armor's face split into a smug grin, and he nuzzled her back. She grumbled at him, but the affection in her voice was undeniable as she reciprocated once more.

I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing out loud. Even though they were husband and wife, they radiated 'High school Sweetheart' energy. Like they never got out of that lovey-dovey phase. Watching them made it hard to believe these were the same royals who’d been part of that insane meeting not long ago. They were just so... normal. It almost made me forget about the whirlwind of chaos I’d been thrown into. It was nice to see ponies acting like they did on the show.

They nuzzled for a bit long before I saw their tails lift up and... pat Shining Armor's flank?

Shining seemed to snap out of the lovey-dovey display before clearing his throat with an even redder face. "...So, I'm Shining Armor. I'm your-...A Prince—Of the Crystal Empire!" Shining Armor seemingly corrected. He seems less 'Destroy the Xeno' like he was earlier and more like a nervous ambassador for the Equestrian race now. "I got my start as a Royal Guard and made it all the way to Captain. That...well that changed when we tied the knot ." Shining Armor smiled fondly. "I know I'm not wearing a crown, but we're both Equestrian Royalty, like Luna, Celestia, Blueblood, and Twilee..." Shining Armor finished before pausing. "Oh yeah! I think you already met her. We call her "Twilee", but her real name is Twilight Sparkle. She's my little sister."

“Yeah, I know about Twilight. She’s been taking good care of me. At least I’m not dead yet.” The words slipped out, and my stomach twisted into a knot as soon as they did.

Twilight’s name was like a trigger, and suddenly it all rushed back, hitting me like a tidal wave. I couldn’t stop seeing it—Twilight, standing between me and Celestia’s halberd. That look in her eyes. The fear, the shock. How close I’d come to being skewered, right then and there. I could still feel the panic clawing at my chest. If Twilight hadn’t done what she did and stepped in... I’d be dead. No question about it.

But then there was Luna... I couldn’t forget what she did to me. She’d used me.

I feel like a tool, but... she saved me, too, in a way. Maybe not directly, but it was enough to make everyone else jump in. Even Cadance, Shining Armor, Twilight, Trixie—they all tried. They tried because she made sure everyone saw just how weak I was...

Cadance’s voice broke through the haze of memories with the tact of an obsidian scalpel. "Yeaaaah... Twilight always does her best to make sure her friends are doing okay." She said gently. "I wish she'd focus on herself more, but I'm glad she’s looking out for you."

I forced a small smile. "Yeah. Me too." I felt a lump form in my throat. It was hard to look at Cadance and Shining Armor without their faces from earlier flashing back in my mind.

Silence hung in the air for a moment, thick with everything that wasn’t being said. Shining Armor shifted awkwardly, like he wanted to speak but couldn’t quite find the right words. Guess it was my turn to break the ice.

“It’s good to meet you. I’m Edgar... Luna’s Royal Consort, I guess.” The words came out before I could think, low and flat. The title felt weird on my tongue, like I was trying on clothes that didn’t fit. It didn’t feel right to say it, didn’t feel like it was mine.

Shining Armor’s ears flicked when I said it, but he didn’t let his expression slip. Even Cadance’s eyebrow twitched, and her ear flicked like she was holding back something, but her face stayed soft, her eyes full of concern as she looked at me.

"...About that,” Cadance began carefully. “You’ve been through a lot, more than most ponies go through in such a short time. I understand if you’ve got a lot of questions, and honestly, we do too." She leaned in a little, her tone soft but serious. "But first things first: How are you holding up?"

The soft yet loaded question hung in the air, pressing against me as I looked back at the two royals.

"How was I holding up?" That was an unfair question. I’m sitting in an oversized bathtub in front of two ponies who had front-row seats to my near-death experience. What could I even tell them? That I spent the last fifteen minutes trying to become a brainless jellyfish to avoid dealing with reality?

I ran a hand over my face, wiping off the foam that was lingering, and let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

“I’m... managing,” I muttered slowly. I ran a hand through my hair, letting out a long breath. "Honestly? I’m still trying to figure all this out." I shifted in the tub, the warmth doing nothing to calm the tension inside me. "It’s been a stressful few days. I’m in Equestria, and every day something’s either tried to kill me or..." I trailed off, realizing I was about to overshare. I bit my tongue and shook my head. "Never mind. Sorry, I’m still a bit scrambled from everything that happened. Shouldn't force you to be my therapist."

"It’s okay," Cadance said gently. "I can’t imagine what it’s been like for you—being thrown into a world you don’t know, dealing with everything that’s happened. It’s a lot, but I’m glad you’re still here. You’ve been through more than most ponies could handle."

There was something in her voice, a kind of warmth that I hadn’t expected. She wasn’t just being polite—she genuinely sounded like she cared.

I offered a small, half-hearted smile. "Yeah. Still here, somehow." I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck. “Being a Royal Consort... it’s a lot to take in, you know? I guess Luna’s got a funny way of showing she cares.”

Cadance's eyes closed as her ears and eyebrows twitched in annoyance.

“There are thousands of ways to show somepony you care about them,” Cadance said, her voice calm but firm. “But what Luna did... that wasn’t one of them. She shouldn’t have put you through that, even if she thought it was for your protection.” Her gaze softened as she shook her head. “If you ever need to talk or have questions... Shining and I are here. We’re here to listen.”

She glanced at Shining, who nodded in agreement, his eyes serious.

Well, I guess they are offering to be my therapists...Wait a minute. I've heard this song and dance before.

In fact, it happened every single time Celestia tried questioning me right before she goes cuckoo.

“Thanks, I appreciate it.” I tried to smile, but it felt thin, like something I was forcing for their sake. My insides still felt twisted, no amount of polite conversation was going to untangle that. “But I’m guessing you didn’t come all the way down here just to see how I’m doing, right? Especially after what happened earlier.”

Shining Armor blinked, surprised by the bluntness. He shot a quick glance at Cadance, like he was looking for backup. She held his gaze for a second, caught off guard too, but instead of backing down, she met my eyes with this steady determination. Soon, they both nodded.

I sighed inwardly. Figures.

"Alright," I said slowly, leaning back in the tub, "so what’s the real reason you're here? What do you need from me?" I asked, my voice calm but steady. I wasn’t pissed off, more... curious. If they wanted to hurt me, they would’ve done it by now. Instead, they just stood there, kind of awkward, but with what seemed like good intentions. Still, the unease gnawed at me. They weren’t bringing up the elephants in the room. If they weren’t here for that, then what were they here for?

“We’ll try to explain,” Cadance started, her voice gentle. “We want to help make things better, but please understand that we’re trying to make sense of all this too.” She hesitated, glancing at Shining for backup. “What my Aunt Celestia did... I’ve never seen her like that before.”

I raised an eyebrow. "You mean the part where she tried to skewer me with a halberd? Or the part where she looked like she wanted to burn me alive?"

Shining winced, and even Cadance’s expression tightened for a second. It was clear they were both uncomfortable talking about it, but they didn’t shy away.

"Yes," Cadance admitted. "That wasn’t the Celestia we know."

“We’re confused and conflicted,” Shining admitted, frowning like he was wrestling with his own thoughts. “Celestia’s doesn’t just… lash out like that. Especially not without a good reason. So, for her to come after you like that...” He paused, clearly picking his words carefully. “For her to try and end you... it’s not something we can just ignore. We think we know why she did it, and from what we understand, she thinks Equestria is in danger because of you and that touch of yours.”

Touch. The way he said that, like I was carrying around some kind of contagious disease, rubbed me the wrong way.

“But we haven’t seen any proof that you’ve actually done anything wrong,” Shining Armor said, his voice quieter now, like he was working through it himself, trying to make sense of the situation. His brow furrowed in thought, and I could see him searching for some kind of logic that wasn’t there—like maybe if he said it enough times, everything would start to click into place.

I raised an eyebrow, not even trying to hide the sarcasm in my voice. “Didn’t you and your guards draw swords on me?”

"Yes," Shining Armor answered matter-of-factly.

"...That's it?" I asked incredulously.

"Mhmmm." He nodded again, like it was the most natural thing in the world. "Look, at the time, you were an unknown entity, and we were told by Princess Celestia that Princess Luna might have been in serious danger. We didn't know what to expect when we rushed over to your room, but we weren't expecting to walk into that. So, yeah, I did order everypony to draw their swords. When Celestia came in with her halberd, we all did our best to get that door open and stop her too. Our guards did everything they were supposed to do, but you and me? We're cool now."

"Until Celestia changes her mind and orders you to kill me, right?" I asked them. I'm really starting to regret having them come in here...

"We wouldn't, and you don't have to worry about Princess Celestia, okay?" Cadance jumped in quickly to try and reassure me. "We respect Aunt Celestia enough to say no when we have to. Princess Celestia taught us a lot of things, including how to think for ourselves. If she’s wrong, we’re not going to follow through just because she says so."

“Even if she could order ponies to do that now or ask myself or Cadance to hurt you,” Shining added, “We’d need a lot more than words to justify it. Without naming names, my wife and I had some reservations about what a few of the ponies in that room did, so it's going to be a touchy subject for a while."

"All because of a little bite mark and a last minute OK you got from Luna, right?" I let out a small, humorless laugh. "That's comforting."

Shining shook his head, discomfort flickering across his face as he fidgeted where he stood. Cadance, however, remained focused, her expression soft but intent.

“Edgar, I’m not asking you to understand right now. Just... listen.” Her voice was steady. “Celestia doesn’t do this. She’s always been level-headed, even in the worst situations, and especially not toward someone who hasn’t done anything—at least, not that we can see. But... there’s something else.” She exchanged a glance with Shining Armor, who nodded grimly. “You’re not the first human who’s made it here to Equestria.”

“Wait, what?" The words hit me like a bucket of cold water. I blinked at her, the tension that had started to creep into my muscles freezing in place as I struggled to wrap my mind around the idea. “Like, I'm not the only one?”

“It's why Celestia’s so on edge,” Shining explained, his tone careful. “According to the other three Alicorns, you’re not the first human she’s encountered. And based on what both of them said about what happened with the others... they didn’t end well. Let’s just say it left her with more than a few scars.”

“According to the other three—You mean both Twilight and Luna knew?” The words slipped out, sharper than I intended.

"Not until last night." Cadance nodded, her expression sympathetic. “That’s why Celestia's so afraid of you, Edgar. She’s seen what humans can do, and she’s scared of what will happen while you're here. We want to talk this out with you ourselves.”

I let out a shaky breath, feeling the tension coil tighter in my chest. “So, what? You think I’m dangerous too, but you’re just... not sure yet?” I scoffed, the sound bitter as it left my throat. “Sounds like you’re doing recon on me. Like this is just another ‘interrogation.’” I leaned back against the edge of the tub, the weight of their expectations pressing down on me. They’re waiting for an answer I don’t have. I wasn’t sure what to tell them. Everything had been a blur since I got here—one moment I was screwing around before graduation, the next I was getting tangled up in Luna’s... whatever the hell that was.

Cadance’s expression softened even more, but she didn’t deny it. “We’re not here to interrogate you, Edgar. We just want to understand what’s going on—but we need to be sure. From what Twilight said, Celestia’s account of the other humans is... well, it’s the only one we have.”

Shining nodded slowly. "We know it’s unfair, but we’ve got to be cautious.”

I ran a hand over my face, wiping off the bubbles that clung to my skin. It felt like I was under a microscope.

“I... I don’t know what you want me to say,” I admitted, feeling drained. “I haven’t done anything. I’ve been tossed around like a ragdoll for the past few days, and I’m still trying to figure out what the hell is even happening.”

Shining Armor frowned, clearly dissatisfied with my answer, but Cadance seemed more patient.

"You’re saying you don’t know about your touch?" She asked, her eyes searching mine for any sign of dishonesty. "You've never tried using it to get something you want?"

Her question caught me off guard.

"Touch".

That word again.

Celestia seemed so cautious of it, and she didn't even shake my hand when we had our talk yesterday. She looked at it like I was pointing a gun at her, and she looked so terrified for Luna when she saw is in bed together...so furious... She even suggested it was the only reason that Twilight wanted to save me in the first place.

And now they're asking about it.

"What can I say? Celestia made it clear that if I 'touched' anyone, she’d know." I said, a hint of frustration creeping into my voice. "Did you know she held a molten pot of tea over my head, saying that if I touched her that her magic would fail and it'd fall on me? That was yesterday." I finished, my jaw clenching as the memory replayed in my mind. The ponies seemed taken aback for a moment before Cadance shook her head, her expression sympathetic. "Last night, Luna said that Celestia said touching ponies was a-okay now since she told me sex was the only way to take care of the changeling bite, but guess how I found out that was a lie this morning. Now you're in here talking like my hands are a weapon." I was practically spitting out the words. “What is it about my "touch" that’s got you all so freaked out?"

Shining Armor and Cadance exchanged a glance, one that spoke volumes despite it's subtlety. It was like they were trying to figure out how to explain something huge to me without freaking me out. Cadance shifted slightly, her wings rustling as she moved closer. "Twilight told us some things about it earlier...and my aunts confirmed it. Both of them." she began carefully, as if she were handling a fragile object. "According to Celestia, whenever you make contact with somepony, it has an effect on them—an effect that's hard for them to notice at first. From what we know, it could potentially make ponies... feel things. Strong things."

"Feel things how? What kind of 'things' are we talking about?" I asked, trying to wrap my head around it. "How long did Twilight know about all of this?"

Cadance came to the defense of Twilight once more.

"Again, not since last night." She said softly. "Twilight doesn't have many details right now, but from what we know, it could range from heightened emotions to, well, more personal feelings. It’s something that might not be intentional, but the longer you’re in contact with somepony, the more intense it becomes."

"Cadance wanted to talk with you the moment she put two and two together, but then she heard from Celestia saying that Princess Luna was in danger..." Shining Armor said, his expression grim. "Well, here we are."

I blinked, processing their words, but my brain felt sluggish. "Wait... so you're saying... I’m brainwashing ponies to like me? Like, against their will?"

"That's what they thought might be happening, but no." Cadance winced slightly, shaking her head. "It’s more subtle than that. It’s almost like... their emotions are magnified. If a pony already feels something—like affection or admiration—you make it stronger. And if a pony is vulnerable..." She trailed off.

I stared at her in disbelief.

"...and why are we listening to Celestia about this now?" I yelled. "She wants me dead!"

"Edgar..." Cadance started. Her voice was gentle but firm, trying to bring me back to the present. But I wasn't having any of it.

“No, this is bullshit! I’m not brainwashing anyone! I can’t!” I snapped. My heart was pounding in my chest, a mix of frustration and fear choking me up.

"Edgar," Shining Armor’s voice cut through my anger, firm and steady. "I get that this is a lot to take in, but I have to politely ask that you calm down. You're yelling at my wife." His earlier awkwardness had vanished, replaced by a more authoritative presence. "We're not here to yell at you, and we're not here to jump to any conclusions about this situation. But if we want to understand what's going on here, we're going to have to ask some uncomfortable questions. So... I'm sorry if we seem insensitive, but it's better than being too lenient?" He looked to his wife, and she nodded.

"I'm sorry. It's just..." I paused, taking a deep breath to rein in the storm of emotions that had burst out of me. I realized how I must have looked. Lashing out wasn’t helping anyone, least of all me. “None of this makes sense. I’m not even magical. If anything, I’m magic-repellant. Look, I’ll prove it—just hit me with a magic bolt or something.”

Shining shook his head, his tone softening. "It’s alright, and there’s no need for that. We know you’re immune to magic, but that’s part of the issue. Twilight and Cadance got to talking earlier this morning, and they think your immunity might be what makes your touch so strong."

Cadance nodded gently. “It’s not about you casting spells or intentionally manipulating anypony like a puppet master. It’s more about how your magic-nullifying property interacts with the natural magic inside us. It... distorts things. We ponies are naturally inclined to follow what our hearts desire, and when you touch us, it makes that want louder—harder to ignore."

I shifted uneasily in the tub, the weight of their words sinking in. It all sounded so absurd—my touch influencing others? Amplifying emotions? It felt like something ripped out of a magical romance novel.

"I... I need proof," I said, my voice quieter. "I can’t just take your word or Celestia’s. How do I know it's real?"

Cadance’s eyes softened, but her gaze held firm. “Trixie.”

The name hit me like a punch to the gut.

“...What about her?” I asked, my throat tightening as memories of her flooded back—her confession of love, her crumpled tear-stricken face when she caught Luna and me together. She’d told me she loved me—loved me—after barely knowing me. Before, I thought maybe she was just overly protective of me ever since I scared off the dragon. But after that...

“Think back to the night you two met. Did you notice her becoming clingy?” Cadance’s voice was gentle but steady. “I don't want to get into too much detail yet, but let's just say that I have very good intuition to think something more may have happened that night...between the both of you.”

My stomach clenched. “...but we were both drunk that night,” I muttered, trying to brush off her insinuation. "Even then, We didn't have sex or anything, I swear. We barely even touched, and Trixie fell asleep before anything serious could happen.”

The room fell silent.

"Ummm..." Cadance’s voice faltered, her expression shifting to one of surprise, her eyes widening. "I'm sorry, but what?"

...Fuck, it wasn't just them being coy. How am I supposed to take that back?!?

The silence stretched longer, and I could feel the tension in the room rising, like the steam curling up from the bath. Both Shining Armor and Cadance exchanged glances, but this time, their surprise was palpable. Cadance’s wings twitched slightly, and Shining blinked several times, his mouth opening and closing like he was about to say something but couldn't find the words.

Finally, Shining Armor’s brow furrowed, his face reflecting the same confusion. “Still not trying to interrogate you, but what did happen that night?”

"Nothing extreme." I muttered, avoiding their eyes. "We both wanted to go to sleep after we talked for a long time, but Trixie's bed was pony-sized for one. So we laid down together...with her on top." I explained. "She....She got a little hot and bothered and started rubbing herself on me, but nothing else happened, I swear."

That wasn't true.

"...She did cum on me and I did go to sleep with a boner, but there was nooooo penetration involved. I didn't do anything to her except hug her back. We just... I mean, I hugged her after she was done and we cuddled and fell asleep, sure, but it wasn’t like—"

"...and you didn't try to stop her? Say "no"?" Cadance asked with a raised eyebrow.

"...No. I did, but I didn't try very hard..." I admitted. The memory of that night felt like a blur. “When we woke up and she got pissy because she thought I wet myself from being drunk, I said it was a nightmare because...Well I couldn't just come out and say what she did that night! She'd never live it down if she remembered what happened.” I looked back at both of them, and their expressions shifted to the facial equivalent of a blue-screen. "I'm sorry. It all happened too fast for me and I didn't know what to do. I..."

...I took advantage of a drunken mare...

"...Okay, that's a lot to unpack, but we can come back to it later." Cadance said, trying to keep her composure. She didn't show it, but I could almost hear the weight of what I’d said was sinking in for her, too.

Shining Armor cleared his throat, staring at the ceiling. His voice came out steady but strained as he tried to shift the conversation forward. "Alright... so, we’ve got a clearer picture now. It sounds like things got... complicated with that magician." He paused, his brow furrowing in thought, but he kept his tone neutral. "It sounds like you feel guilty, but it doesn’t sound like you forced anything. Trixie made her own choices, even if she was drunk. I'm not excusing either of you for that or anything. You're both adults and responsible for your own actions, but yeah, you need to handle things more maturely going forward. Speaking as a married stallion," He glanced at Cadance before adding, "I think you should tell her what really happened—from your side. She deserves to know the truth, even if it’s not easy to explain."

"Yeah... I guess I should," I muttered, my voice barely above a whisper. My throat felt dry, like the words were being dragged out of me against my will.

"Do you need any more proof than Trixie?" Cadance asked carefully.

"...No... I don't." The words tumbled out, heavy with resignation. "It explains Luna, or why Twilight was so willing to help me. All I did was bump her nose..." I trailed off, shaking my head, unable to shake the gnawing thought that I was unintentionally influencing those around me. "I didn’t know..."

Cadance’s eyes darkened momentarily, but she quickly masked it with a gentle smile. "Oh Edgar, don’t beat yourself up." Her voice was warm, but I could feel the tension beneath it, as if she were carefully avoiding a deeper wound. “You didn’t know.”

Shining Armor stepped forward, his firm tone sounding more reassuring than accusatory. “You’re not the first pony—or hyu-man, I guess—to be caught in relationship drama. Trust me, Cadance knows how complicated feelings can get. What matters is that you weren’t trying to hurt anypony.”

I sank lower into the water, feeling the warmth of the bath do nothing to ease the cold pit of guilt growing inside me. "I hurt them," I whispered, the weight of it crushing me from the inside. "I didn't even realize I was doing it, but I made them fall in love with me... none of it was real, was it? Just my touch, twisting their feelings, making them believe I was worth something. Trixie’s tears, Twilight’s loyalty... Luna’s..." My voice cracked, unable to finish the thought. "It was all because of me, and that means Celestia was right...

“Not necessarily,” Cadance cut in, her tone soothing yet serious. "Don't take this the wrong way, but Twilight jumping in was all her, not you. Twilight is a special pony. I’ve known her since she was a filly, and trust me—she wouldn’t need any convincing to protect someone she thought was in danger." Cadance continued with a small pause. "I'm positive that you didn’t create those feelings for them. I don't think you're forcing anypony to feel something that wasn’t already there. Your touch just... amplifies what’s inside. Spreading love that's already there isn't inherently evil. I often find myself stumbling upon friends, families, and herds who might be fighting with each other. I don't use magic to force them to love each other, but I do use it to remind them why they loved each other so much in the first place. If Trixie didn’t care about you at all, she wouldn’t have reacted the way she did."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" I shot back, bitterness creeping into my voice despite myself. The guilt still churned inside me, heavy and cold, refusing to let go.

Cadance paused, her expression softening as she met my eyes. "Actually, Edgar, yes—it should make you feel better," Her tone was gentle, but there was conviction behind it. "I think I speak for both of us now when I say that we now believe you aren't doing this on purpose. You’re not a villain or some kind of monster. Trust us, we've seen monsters before. Those who’ve used love as a weapon to twist hearts, to take and never give—ponies who truly wanted others to hurt." Her eyes flickered, just for a moment, with a shadow of something darker—something that carried the weight of painful memories—but she quickly brushed it away, focusing on me again. She didn't say the name, but I knew exactly who she was referring to. "You’re nothing like that.”

"The fact that you are feeing as guilty as you are shows that you probably care a lot about her feelings. Her and everypony else you might have been in contact with, just like they care about you. That’s important. There’s more love here than hate, and that's a sign of Hope." she continued softly. "It means that not everypony is out to get you. It means that ponies like Trixie, Twilight," Cadance paused again. "...And even Aunt Luna... care about you because they see something in you worth caring about." Cadance seemed to tiptoe around the subject of Luna. "And that’s not something to take lightly," she added. "It’s a sign that there’s still hope for understanding, for connection—even with Princess Celestia. If we take the time, maybe she’ll come to see that you’re not a threat."

I shook my head, laughing bitterly. "The same Celestia who almost skewered me in front of everyone? That Celestia?"

Cadance took a deep breath, her wings relaxing as she continued. 'My Cutie Mark isn’t about seeing the future—it’s about understanding Love. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about it, it’s that love has the power to change even the hardest of hearts. I know that Celestia can change too, if we give her time...and a chance.”

Shining Armor, who had been quietly listening, stepped forward. "Hope extends to her too, same as you. “I don't think you've seen the side of Celestia we know yet. The real Celestia."

"The REAL Celestia?" I snorted, unconvinced. "Yeah, I’m not holding my breath."

Shining’s expression remained steady. "I’m not saying it’ll be easy, and I’m not saying it’ll happen overnight. But she's not some heartless ruler. She’s been around a long time, and there’s a reason she’s held in such high regard by so many. There’s hope that, given enough time, she’ll see that you’re more than whatever she fears." He paused, his gaze softening. "We’ve known Celestia for a long time, and I..." Shining Armor was interrupted as Cadance scooted a little close to her husband, leaning her head against him. "...Well, we hope that one day, you’ll get to meet the Celestia we know and love. At least before you have to leave."

I sighed, letting myself slide a little deeper into the water, feeling the warmth barely reaching the tension still knotted up in my chest. “The real Celestia...” I muttered, half to myself. I could still see the look in her eyes, the absolute fury when she’d cornered me. I wasn’t ready to believe she’d just... change her mind because I played nice. But Shining’s words stuck with me. Maybe I hadn’t met the “real” her yet. Maybe all I’d seen was her fear. "I guess we'll see."

Cadance seemed to sense my doubt, her gaze softening again. “You’re not alone in this, Edgar,” she said quietly. “We’ll do what we can to help, but you’ll need to trust us too.” Her words hung in the air for a moment, and I could feel the sincerity in them, but it didn’t quite reach the part of me that was still wrestling with the storm inside. "We'll try to figure out a way to smooth things over."

The sound of a soft knock echoed through the steamy bathroom.

“It's Twilight.” came the voice, muffled but unmistakable. “Can I come in?”

I exchanged a quick glance with Cadance and Shining Armor. They hadn’t mentioned her arrival earlier, but I wasn’t surprised to see her. With everything that had been going on, it was only a matter of time before she checked in.

“Yeah." I called out, wiping my face and forehead free of any stress.

Twilight Sparkle poked her head in, her eyes a little red, like she’d been crying. She was holding herself together, but just barely. Her mane was frazzled in that familiar Twilight way—probably from stress. But despite the obvious weight she was carrying, when her eyes landed on me, she blinked, and the faintest hint of a smile curled at the corner of her lips.

"Nice beard." She said, pointing to my face.

I blinked, glancing down at my reflection in the water. Sure enough, despite wiping my face clean earlier, a new foam beard had formed, clinging to my chin like some kind of cartoonish prop. “Oh, come on...” I muttered, wiping at it again. “I swear these bubbles are cursed.”

Twilight giggled quietly before stepping fully into the room, her eyes softening as she took in the sight of us all. "How are you doing, Edgar?" she asked gently, but before I could answer, Shining Armor and Cadance were already moving toward her.

“Twilee,” Shining began, concern lacing his voice. “How are you doing? Did you and Celestia...?”

Twilight’s smile faltered for a second, her ears drooping slightly, but she straightened up, giving her brother a reassuring nod. “It was... hard,” she admitted, her voice a little quieter now. “We yelled...and cried...and apologized...and talked. We don’t agree on a lot of things right now, especially when it comes to Edgar.” She gave me an apologetic look before continuing. “But... we made it through and we spent most of the time hugging it out. I know it’s not going to be easy, and we’re still on opposite sides of what we think is right. But... it’s not going to ruin our relationship. We still trust each other, and we know we're only fighting about this so much because we're worried about each other.” She took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as if she were letting go of some of the tension she’d been holding. “It’ll take more than one argument to break what we have.”

I sat up straighter in the tub, rubbing a hand over my face. "I'm... sorry you had to go through that, Twilight. Really." The words felt heavier than they sounded, and they were a lot harder to get out than I’d expected. Twilight as she probably just described her personal hell. Going toe-to-toe with Celestia about me couldn’t have been easy. Yet here she was, holding herself together. I knew she had it in her, but seeing it in person was something else. It was inspiring to see her make it through that.

Twilight gave me a weak but genuine smile. "I'm okay. Just recuperating." Before she could say more, Shining Armor and Cadance were already moving. Without a word, they closed the gap between them and Twilight, pulling her into a gentle but firm hug. It was almost instinctual, the way they held her, like she was something fragile and precious. Shining wrapped one hoof around her, while Cadance leaned her head against Twilight's. It wasn’t just for her, though—I could see the way they clung to each other, finding comfort in the closeness. Twilight blinked in surprise for a moment but then let herself relax, her eyes closing as she melted into the embrace. I could see her body sagging slightly, the weight of the day catching up to her as she took a deep breath, steadying herself.

"...This helps though." Twilight murmured softly into her brother's shoulder.

For a moment, the room was quiet, the warmth of the hug filling the space as they kind of tetter-tottered in place like someone would do in a very meaningful hug. The quiet stretched on, the soft hum of the bathwater and the warmth of the room filling the space between us. I shifted a bit, watching as they held each other. It felt like I was peeking in on a scene that was too personal for me to belong in—a reminder that, despite everything, I was still the outsider here. These ponies had a bond that went far beyond what I could ever really understand, no matter how much I thought I knew about them from before. But strangely enough, I was glad. Twilight needs this more than anyone else in the room right now.

Cadance was the first to speak after the hug broke, her tone gentle but with a hint of playfulness. "Feel better?" she asked, stepping back slightly to give Twilight some space.

Twilight nodded, a small but more genuine smile forming on her face now. "Yeah... thanks. I really needed that."

"Good. Hugs always make things better for everypony." Cadance smiled warmly, her eyes soft as she watched Twilight relax just a little. "It's been a rough start to the morning for all of us," she said. Then, almost as if the momentary relief sparked an idea, her eyes lit up. "What do you say we go grab some quiche or funnel cakes?" Her voice took on a brighter tone, like she was trying to push the morning’s gloom away. "You know, to reset the day."

Twilight hesitated, her smile faltering as she looked down at her hooves. She bit her lip, like she was weighing whether or not to break the mood. Shining Armor caught the shift immediately, tilting his head slightly. "What is it, Twilee?"

Twilight let out a sigh before meeting their eyes. "There’s... something else we need to talk about." She glanced at me for a split second before looking back at her brother and Cadance. "There’s going to be another meeting later today. With all the royals."

Shining Armor blinked, his ears twitching as his eyes narrowed slightly. "Right. About the incursion, right?"

Twilight hesitated, her eyes flicking to me again before she shook her head slowly. “No… it’s not about the changelings.”

Cadance raised an eyebrow, confusion crossing her features. “Then what’s the meeting about?”

Twilight swallowed hard, visibly bracing herself. “Edgar… again.”

Shining Armor’s expression darkened, his brow furrowing as he glanced at Cadance. “Wait, what? Again?” His voice was measured, but there was an edge of frustration creeping in. “Look, Twilee, I get that Edgar’s situation is… complicated. But we came here for two reasons: to make sure you were okay, and to discuss the second major changeling incursion since our wedding. That’s a serious red flag, and historically, it’s a sign they’re preparing to swarm since it was done in such a short time frame.” He paused, clearly trying to choose his words carefully. “I’m not saying Edgar’s situation isn't hard for him, but… is it really that important?”

Twilight didn’t flinch at her brother’s words. She just met his gaze, her own steady and sure, despite the weight of what she was about to say. “Yes,” she said simply.

Shining Armor opened his mouth as if to argue, but whatever he saw in Twilight’s eyes stopped him. He let out a slow breath, his shoulders sagging slightly. Cadance, too, looked like she wanted to say something, but instead, she just nodded, though her confusion hadn’t entirely faded.

“Alright,” Shining said, his voice quieter now. “If you say it’s that important, then we’ll be there. But I hope this makes sense soon, Twilee.”

Twilight gave him a small, appreciative smile, but the tension in the room didn’t ease.

“Is that everything?” Cadance asked, her voice soft but tinged with a cautious curiosity, as if she wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to hear the answer.

Twilight’s hesitation returned. Her eyes flickered nervously between me and Cadance before she shifted uncomfortably on her hooves. “No… there’s one more thing.”

Cadance’s eyes narrowed slightly, and I could see the gears turning in her head. “What is it, Twilight?” she asked, her tone a little sharper now, though she still tried to keep it gentle.

Twilight fidgeted, clearly struggling with how to phrase it. She glanced at Cadance, then quickly looked away, her ears flattening slightly. “Please don’t get mad,” she started, her voice low, like she was already anticipating the reaction. “But... Princess Luna is still waiting in the other room.”

The temperature in the room seemed to drop instantly. Shining Armor’s hoof shot up to his forehead with a heavy smack. “Aw, jeez...” he muttered, rubbing his face in disbelief.

Cadance’s reaction was much more visceral. Her ears pinned back, and for the first time since I’d met her, I saw a flicker of real anger in her eyes. "What?"

Twilight’s wings drooped as she glanced between the two of them. “I... I tried to tell her it'd be best for her to leave, but she’s insisting. She wants to take some time to apologize...and she wants to see if Edgar wants to allow her to finish welcoming him into her Royal Herd properly... with an ablution.”

...

"Unreal..." Cadance hissed, her voice low and sharp, barely holding back the fury boiling underneath. Her wings twitched as she paced in place, her eyes narrowing as if she were trying to contain the storm inside. "Un-fucking-real."

Twilight winced at Cadance’s outburst but didn’t try to defend Luna. Instead, she just gave her sister-in-law a sympathetic look, as if she had expected this response all along.

It was the first time I’d heard her swear even with all the drama earlier, and the intensity behind it caught me off guard too. Even Shining Armor, who was usually calm under pressure, stiffened slightly beside her, though he didn’t seem entirely surprised by her reaction. His ears drooped a little, but he wisely kept quiet, knowing better than to interrupt her when she was like this.

Cadance’s pacing stopped as she took a deep breath, clearly fighting to control the storm brewing inside her. Her wings were twitching, her chest rising and falling faster than usual. “I swear,” she muttered under her breath, “defeathering wouldn’t be an overreaction.”

Twilight shifted uneasily, clearly feeling the tension. "She... she said she wants to take some time to talk to Edgar and explain why she did what she did while they, um, wash each other." Her voice sounded hesitant, like she knew just how absurd the whole thing was but had no choice but to bring it up. She bit her lip, shooting a nervous glance at Cadance, who was practically vibrating with barely contained fury. “Luna thinks that finishing up will help clear the air between them. But she won’t force Edgar. If he refuses, she'll just clean herself up once he's done.”

Cadance’s wings flared out for a moment before folding back, and her jaw clenched tightly. “And she thinks this is okay??? Unbelievable,” she spat, her voice a low simmer. She turned to me, her eyes intense as they bore into mine, her frustration clear. “Gee, what do you think, Edgar? Do you want to do an ablution with my Aunt Luna right after what happened earlier?”

I opened my mouth to answer but quickly realized I didn’t know what the hell I’d be agreeing to. "I’m going to be careful with how I say this..." I started cautiously, feeling like I was walking through a minefield. "Before I say yes or no, what exactly is an 'ablution' and what would I be agreeing to?"

Cadance’s wings twitched again, her frustration bubbling beneath the surface as she took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. Her voice was tight, clearly holding back her anger. “Edgar... do you even know what a Royal Consort is?”

I blinked, “Uh... no? Not really. I just found out I apparently was one this morning." I admitted, rubbing the back of my neck. "I have some ideas, but it’s not like she handed me a rulebook or anything.”

For a second, there was silence. Cadance’s eyes darkened with a simmering fury. She stared at me, her face composed, but I could see the anger sparking in her eyes.

The room went dead silent for a beat, and when I looked back at Cadance, her expression had darkened with a mix of shock and fury.

"…I’m going to do it," she muttered, her voice low and seething.

I blinked, confused. "Do what?"

Her eyes narrowed, her voice dropping dangerously low. “With a potato peeler,” she hissed, her wings twitching like she was barely holding herself back. “I’m going to defeather her with a potato peeler.”

Shining Armor sighed softly and stepped closer to his wife, trying to play peacemaker. “Babe? Baaaaabe~... Mi Amore?” His tone was soft but firm, the kind of voice that said he’d been here before. “I hear what you’re saying, and I love and validate you... But maybe we should dial it back a notch and, you know... calm down a bit?”

Cadance’s head snapped toward him, and her glare could’ve melted steel.

“I’M CALM! LOOK HOW CALM I AM!” Cadance said calmly in the most un-calm tone imaginable as she wiped away a tear of ~~frustration~~ calmness. “I am completely calm!”

It was like watching a volcano try to convince you it wasn’t about to erupt. Her wings flared wide, and she stomped her hoof on the tile floor with a sharp crack, the word reverberating off the walls like a cannon blast. The sheer intensity made me jump...but strangely enough it also took everything in me not to laugh. Cadance might’ve been furious, but there was something almost... endearing about the way she was on the verge of exploding.

Shining didn’t flinch, though. He just smiled, patient as ever, and threw me a sideways glance like, help a guy out here, would ya? “And I totally believe you, love. It’s just that-” He gave me a wink. “You miiiight be scaring Edgar a little.”

I gave a half-nod, more amused than anything. "Yeah, gotta admit... the potato peeler thing's a bit intense."

"I don't meeaaaan it!" Cadance huffed, and while her frustration was intense, it wasn’t directed at me. It was clear that she wasn’t angry with me but at the situation itself. She proved it as she turned to me with a sheepish look as her face started to soften. “I’m sorry for yelling,” she muttered. She turned to Shining Armor and leaned into him, rubbing her neck against his with an affectionate nuzzle. “I love you, Shiny.”

“I love you too, Cady,” Shining replied, pulling her closer with a comforting nuzzle, his tone gentle like this was just how they calmed each other down.

Cadance took a deep breath, visibly trying to rein in her emotions. The storm inside her hadn’t fully settled, though, and her voice still had that simmering edge when she spoke again. “To answer your first question...” Her gaze flicked to me, eyes narrowing just a little as she continued, “An Ablution is a ceremonial cleansing. It’s part of the Prima Nocta. Your first night together that Aunt Luna, and I want to stress this, tricked you into when she made you her Royal Consort. It’s supposed to mark the final step in bringing you fully into her herd."

“So... it’s like an fancy bath?” I asked, trying to make sense of it.

Cadance’s wings twitched, and she gave me a tight-lipped frown. "No Edgar, it's not just a ‘fancy bath.’ It’s supposed to be romantic and sacred tradition after a herd’s first night together." She huffed at me. "After you’ve, well... make love, you clean each other. It’s meant to wash away the remnants of your night together. You're symbolically cleaning the ‘impurities’ of your pasts and your promising to take care of each other in the future. It’s like saying, ‘We’ve accepted each other for who we are. We shared everything, even the most intimate parts of our lives, and now we want to start a new life together.’"

“Whoa, I’m sorry. I didn’t know…” I apologized quickly.

"No no, it's fine. I'm sorry. It's not your fault, It’s just that—" she struggled, clearly searching for the right words before letting out a growl of frustration. "Ugggh! Of course you don't know! I bet she didn’t tell you anything on purpose!" She ranted as she paced in a really tight circle. "That’s not love, Edgar. That’s... I don't know what that is. It's like something straight out of Chrysalis’ playbook! How could she do such a thing!?!"

Her words hung in the air, heavy and biting. Hearing that name—Chrysalis—I could feel the weight behind it. This wasn’t just anger. Cadance was hurt, and the more she spoke, the more I could see how deep that wound ran. This wasn’t just about what Luna had done—it was about how wrong everything felt at its core for her like she couldn't believe what her own family had done.

"And you washing each other to finish it?" Cadance continued, her voice dropping to a low, simmering tone. “It doesn’t even make sense! There’s no point to it! You’re immune to magic, Edgar. Even though Aunt Luna is royalty, there are no magical promises that can be made between you two. And thanks to her little stunt this morning, Celestia can’t harm or order anypony to harm you anyway. So what’s the point? To mock your feelings?" She shook her head, her voice growing confused. More frustrated... Sadder. "It just feels... cruel. Like she’s trying to convince you that finishing this will make everything better. But it’s not going to change anything. It’s just gonna to mess with you, whether she realizes it or not.”

I stayed quiet, processing what she was saying. A part of me wanted to know what Luna had to say for herself, but Cadance’s words were sinking in. I had a hard time understanding what I actually wanted from her after hearing that, but before I could reply, Shining Armor stepped forward with a calm and steady voice.

“Look, Edgar,” he started, “You don't have to, and I don't think you should...but if you want to talk to Luna, I’ll stay in the room. I don’t trust her right now either, and I’ll make sure she doesn’t—”

Twilight quickly interjected, her voice more measured but firm. "Actually, Shining, I think I should stay." She glanced at Cadance, whose wings were still twitching in frustration. "You might be better off helping rein in Cadance if things get a little heated. We don’t want another incident." Her words were careful, but there was no mistaking the subtext. Something had gone down between Cadance and Luna earlier, something big. I didn’t need to know the specifics to figure that much out.

Cadance let out a huff, clearly still on edge, but Shining nodded, understanding Twilight’s unspoken point. He glanced toward his wife, his expression softening. "Yeah... you’re probably right."

Twilight turned to me, her gaze softening too. "Shiny's right. You don't have to, but if you choose to listen to her, I’d like to stay while you talk to her. I don’t think Luna means harm, but... it’s important we make sure everypony’s on the same page this time. No more lies."

I glanced at all three of them, feeling a strange knot form in my throat.. I was an outsider, and yet they cared. It was overwhelming.

...These familiar strangers... these ponies that I thought I knew but didn’t really know. They were still going out of their way to help me. It didn’t make sense. Why? Why were they still here? Why were they batting for me, when I was just some anomaly who’d stumbled into their world and making a muck of everyone's emotions? When I'm just a foreigner that didn't belong...

“Why are you all still here?” I asked, my voice cracking slightly despite my best effort to keep it steady. “Why are you so invested in trying to help me?”

And the moment I asked, I regretted doing so....

The music came back...

The three of them looked at me, surprised by the question. Cadance, Shining Armor, and Twilight—all of them wore different expressions, but the sincerity in their eyes was unmistakable. It was like they couldn’t imagine doing anything but helping me. And that, more than anything else, made my chest feel tight in a way I wasn’t prepared for.

Shining Armor spoke first, his answer as simple as it was honest. "You look like you need help," he said, his tone direct, but there was a kindness in his eyes that I hadn’t expected nor was I surprised by. "That’s all I need to know."

...Oh fuck, that was in character...strike one.

Cadance followed, her voice softer now, the sharp edge of her anger giving way to something more tender, more focused on me than Luna. She took a deep breath, as if steadying herself before speaking, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "Every stallion deserves to feel like a prince, just like every mare deserves to feel like a princess," she said, her tone thick and nasally with emotion. "It’s not about titles or roles... it’s about dignity, Edgar. And I can’t just stand by and watch my Aunts try to strip that away from you." She paused, her gaze locking onto mine, and slowly shook her head, disbelief clouding her eyes. "You matter... and it breaks my heart that you're even asking why we care." Her voice wavered, the vulnerability in her words striking me harder than anything else. Shining Armor stepped a little closer, and acted as a pillar for her to lean on. "You deserve better than that, Edgar... so much better."

No...no God Damn it....Strike two...

Twilight stepped forward with her eyes shining with the same raw emotion Cadance had, but there was something more—hope. Twilight’s voice was soft but unwavering as she spoke, a quiet strength behind her words. "Edgar..."

No...No don't you dare start talking, Twilight!

Twilight's eyes glistening with unshed tears. "...you don’t have to go through this alone. You’ve been through so much in such a short time—more than anypony should have to deal with—and we want to be here for you. You’ve been strong, but you don’t have to carry all of this by yourself."

Her voice wavered, just for a moment, but the conviction behind her words remained firm. "You were here for Trixie... you were here for Ponyville... and you were here for me. The least I can do is be here for you now..." She blinked, her tears threatening to spill, but her smile—small and soft—shone through, filled with warmth and care. "You’re not just some random otherworldly savior." Twilight’s gaze softened as she looked at me, the quiet hope in her eyes unmistakable. "You’re my friend, Edgar. No matter how hard things get... I’m here now." Despite the tears brimming in her eyes, her voice was like a steady rock, grounding me in a way I didn’t know I needed.

oh...

oh no...

That was it...

Strike Three!

I could feel the tears stinging the corners of my eyes and the lump in my throat got worse. Emotions bubbling up before I could stop them and threatening to spill over. I couldn’t handle it. The kindness, the support, the way they were all trying so hard to be there for me—it was too much. I didn’t want to cry in front of them.

Twilight stepped forward, her concern evident. “Edgar... are you okay?”

I didn’t trust myself to speak. I couldn’t afford to fall apart, not in front of them. Desperate for a distraction, I dunked my head under the water, letting the heat wash over me. The muffled silence beneath the surface gave me a momentary escape from the storm swirling in my chest. I stayed there longer than I should have, letting it calm me, until my lungs started to ache for air.

When I resurfaced, I blinked a few times, wiping my face with more focus than necessary. "Ugh... soap in my eyes," I muttered, forcing a laugh. Anything to keep my voice from cracking. I blinked again, hoping they'd buy it.

Given the soft chuckles that followed, I don’t think they did. But none of them called me out on it. They just let it slide, giving me the space I needed. And for that, I was quietly grateful.

"Edgar..." Twilight sniffled with a smile. "It's back." She pointed at my face, and I glanced down to see that, sure enough, the cursed foam beard had returned.

“Of course,” I groaned.

Before I could say more, I heard a soft, almost shaky laugh. Cadance, despite everything, let out a breathy chuckle, doing her best to compose herself as she wiped at her eyes. Her magic sparked to life, and a few tissues floated off the counter, one wiping her eyes and nose while another in her glow hovered next to Twilight, who accepted it with gusto. "At least you're consistent," she joked, her voice still thick with emotion but steadier than before.

I couldn’t stop the small smile tugging at the corners of my lips. It was ridiculous, so absurdly out of place in everything that had happened, but somehow, it made the moment feel lighter. More... bearable.

It was the first real moment of relief I'd felt since this whole mess started, and that little bit of normalcy—no matter how silly—helped me feel like I could finally breathe again. I wasn’t carrying all of this alone. It wasn’t just me against the world anymore. The weight that had been crushing my chest from the moment I’d stepped into this bath felt light, and for the first time in a while, I felt like I could get through this.

I took a deep breath, letting the warmth settle in my chest. "Okay," I said, my voice steady now. "I’ve made up my mind. But before I say anything... is my ‘touch’ going to be a problem if I choose to say yes?"

Cadance and Twilight exchanged a quick glance, then shook their heads.

“No,” Cadance said, her tone more composed now. “Your touch is potent, sure, but it depends on the intimacy. It was pretty obvious that you... finished things with Aunt Luna last night. Washing her after that would be like spitting in the rain—I don't think it will make things worse than if you didn't have that touch.”

"Alright," I said, the knot in my chest loosening just a bit more. "I think I want to talk to her... now that I have a friend with me." I glanced at Twilight, who gave me a soft, reassuring smile, though I could see her fighting to keep her own emotions in check. I kept thinking in the back of my mind that if my touch was affecting her, she was doing her best to work with it. I couldn't have been making things easy for her, and I am glad she's with me right now.

Cadance shook her head as she sighed.

“Edgar, do you know what hurts the most about all of this? It’s not just that Luna manipulated you. It’s that she took something that’s supposed to be sacred—the Prima Nocta—and twisted it. It’s meant to be a celebration of love, trust, and the bond between partners, not as a weapon or a shield.” She paused, her eyes narrowing as she fought back the anger simmering beneath. “This isn’t just some tradition for show. It’s a promise. A way for the royal family to connect with those they cherish. It’s a bond we hold sacred, and she... she’s using it like a political tool. It’s not fair to you, and it’s not fair to what this is supposed to mean.”

Cadance let out a slow breath, her wings twitching as if she were still wrestling with her emotions. Despite the debate simmering beneath her calm exterior, there was a subtle shift in her demeanor—something softer, though clouded with uncertainty. Her eyes flicked between me and the floor, as though weighing her words carefully.

Her voice became more hesitant but gentle. "I want to be honest with you. I’m livid at my Aunt Luna. Believe me, I don’t take what she did lightly, but I don’t think she acted out of malice." She paused, her brow furrowing as she glanced down, her tone growing quieter. "I’ve always drawn a blank from her ever since I first met her, and... given everything she’s been through, I can understand why she holds so much back. She’s been alone for so long during banishment, imprisoned on the moon for a thousand years, and even though she’s been back for a while, there are parts of her that still feel... distant. Isolated."

Cadance’s gaze met mine again, her expression filled with a mix of concern and reluctance. "Luna does care about others. I-I know that. Her dedication to protecting ponies from their nightmares, from the things that torment them... it's proof of how much she wants to help ponies, even if she doesn’t always show it in ways we expect. But... how she’s chosen to handle this? It’s wrong. Deeply wrong. And that’s what scares me. Whether she realizes it or not, she’s hurt you."

Her wings shifted slightly, and I could hear the weight of her words as she continued. "I’m not defending her, Edgar. Not after everything that’s happened, but I've seen her let her guard down earlier. I think before you talk to her, you should remember that Luna isn’t trying to come from a place of cruelty. She’s coming from a place of confusion, loneliness... maybe even love, in her own complicated...fucked-up way. But if this is how she tries to show it, then that’s something we need to confront. Carefully."

She took a deep breath, her voice soft but steady as she leaned in slightly. "That’s why I'll be close. Not just for you, but for her, too. You’re in control, Edgar. At any point, if you want to stop, just say the word, and we’ll be right there. You don’t owe her anything. Don’t let her or this situation make you feel otherwise."

Cadance’s sincerity shone through, even with the undercurrent of anger still simmering just beneath the surface. I could see the conflict in her eyes—her loyalty to her family, and her deep care for my well-being.

I nodded, feeling a bit more grounded. "O-okay," I muttered, trying to process everything she’d said.

She stepped forward, her gaze firm yet compassionate as she repeated herself, her voice a little stronger this time. "No, Edgar, I mean it. You have control here. Over everything." She let the words sink in before adding, "If you need us, if you feel overwhelmed, we’ll be right there.

Shining Armor gave me a reassuring nod, stepping up beside Cadance. "For what it’s worth," he said, his voice steady but kind, "I’m rooting for ya. You’ve got this." There was a sincerity in his words that made it easier to believe, even with everything weighing me down. I nodded back, appreciating the support.

With a final glance at me, Cadance let out a sharp breath, her wings flaring slightly in a huff as she turned and made her way toward the door. Shining Armor followed immediately, moving just close enough to her side that it looked casual—almost instinctual—but I could tell he was deliberately positioning himself. Strategically, he stayed between Cadance and someone waiting just outside, blocking her view with quiet precision.

As they left, Cadance's hoof steps were a little faster like she was power walking out of the room, while Shining’s presence beside her acted like a buffer, keeping her from doing or saying anything she might regret.

Moments after Cadance and Shining Armor left, the room fell into a thick silence, punctuated only by the soft hum of the bathwater and the distant echo of their hoof steps receding. Twilight and I were left alone in the bright light. Her presence a strange but comforting contrast to everything I was feeling. I wasn’t sure what to say to her—if there was anything to say. The words I wanted to speak were tangled in my mind, just like everything else.

But Twilight was the first to break the silence. "So," she said, her voice lighter, trying to break the tension that had been hanging in the air. "Are you ready?"

"Whether I am or not...she's been patient." I nodded, my chest tightening just a little, but I knew this had to happen.

She took a tentative step toward me, her voice soft but steady. "Edgar... before Luna comes in, I just want you to know something."

I glanced up at her, caught off-guard by the sudden shift in her tone. There was something deeper, more personal, in her words now. A sincerity that tugged at the edge of my emotions.

"You don’t have to worry about me," she said, her eyes meeting mine with that unshakable Twilight conviction. "Your touch—everything that’s going on with you—I’m not afraid of it. I’m here because I want to be."

I opened my mouth, ready to ask how she could be so sure, but before I could speak, Twilight gave me a small, almost knowing smile. Like she’d been expecting that exact question.

"Celestia told me something a while ago, before any of this started," Twilight continued, her voice growing quieter, almost reverent. "She said to always trust in myself, to trust my feelings when it comes to the ponies I care about." She paused for a moment, her eyes flicking to the ground as if she were weighing her next words carefully. Then, she looked back up at me, her gaze softer but no less sure. "And I do, Edgar. I trust that you’re not trying to hurt me—or anyone else." Twilight hesitated for just a second, then added, almost sheepishly, "I'm not going to stop listening to her now."

She caught herself the moment the words left her mouth, her eyes widening in realization. The awkwardness hung in the air for a beat, and she shifted, her ears flicking slightly as her gaze wavered. "Well, maybe unless it's about you..." she amended, giving me a small, apologetic smile. "But I think I should listen to her this time. I trust you because I trust myself."

I let out a soft chuckle, despite the tightness in my chest. It was such a simple moment, but somehow, it felt like a lifeline. Her presence was grounding, giving me something solid to hold onto in the middle of all this confusion.

"...Thanks, Twilight," I muttered, my voice quieter than I’d intended. "I needed to hear that."

Twilight’s smile faded just slightly as she glanced at the door, her expression shifting to something more serious. "That’s her," she whispered, more to herself than to me, and I felt my heart beat faster in response.

My heart pounded in my chest, the dull thud filling my ears as Twilight’s words hung in the air. Luna—the one pony I wasn’t sure I could face, and yet, the one I couldn’t ignore.

It had only been a few hours since everything happened. Memories of her touch—both the comfort and the confusion it brought—flashed through my mind. She’d been a protector, a seductress, a manipulator. My thoughts spiraled back to the night we spent together, the way she made me feel like I mattered, like I was something more than just "Edgar". But now, those same moments felt tainted. Was it real? Was any of it real? Did she even care about me at all, or was I just another pawn in some grand conspiracy?

And yet... part of me wanted to believe that she did care. Even after everything, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something deeper, something that went beyond what I was hearing and feeling.

I wanted answers. I wanted to confront her. I needed to know why. But part of me dreaded what she might say, because what if... what if she confirmed it? What if everything I felt for her, every ounce of trust I thought I had, was based on a lie?

What do I even want her to say?

The knock echoed again, softer this time, but still insistent. I took a deep breath, letting the sound settle in my chest, feeling the weight of what was about to happen bear down on me. Twilight gave me a small nod, then walked over to the door, cracking it open just enough to peek through.

“Come in,” she said softly, stepping aside to make room.

I wasn’t ready, but I couldn't stall any longer. The door creaked open...

...And then, there she was.

Princess Luna stepped into the room, and the first thing that struck me was how different she looked.

She didn’t stand with the proud, regal bearing I’d grown used to. There was no grand entrance, no overwhelming presence that I was expecting. She didn’t command the room—she barely even took up space. Instead, she seemed... smaller. Her movements were slow, almost reluctant, like each step was a struggle under the weight of something far heavier than the crown she wasn't wearing.

Her mane still wasn't flowing flowing with stars and the deep blues of the night sky. That was the same this morning and last night when we were together....but the way it drooped. They way it hung limp and matted, with a few stray strands clinging to her neck and face.

What was once a radiant, otherworldly aura now looked dull, almost lifeless, as though the magic that sustained it had flickered out. Her wings weren’t tucked neatly at her sides either and instead drooped down to touch the floor. Feathers stuck out in places, as if she hadn’t bothered to fix them, or didn’t have the strength to care.

Her face?

Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, the tears still fresh enough to leave streaks down her cheeks. There was a mark that hadn’t been there before—a faint, hoof-shaped mark on the side of her face, with a small cut where the blow must have landed. I didn’t need to guess what the “incident” between Cadance and Luna had been anymore. There is something poetic about both our our cheeks having a cut and hoof-shaped bruise. It's almost like we match...

And yet, even in her disheveled state, there was that familiar tug inside me. Even with her looking so defeated, there was something familiar—something I couldn’t quite shake. This was still Luna. The mare who had saved me more than once, who had made me feel... something, even when I didn’t know what that something was. It was twisted, confusing, but it was real. She was still the one who had made me feel like I mattered in ways I hadn’t expected.

Our eyes met, and for a brief second, I saw it—regret, pain, maybe even fear. Her mouth opened like she wanted to speak, but the words stuck, trapped in her throat. The air in the room felt heavier, thick with the weight of everything unsaid, with the mess of emotions neither of us had been able to make sense of.

“E-Edgar...?” Luna’s voice trembled, fragile in a way I’d never heard before. It was as though she didn’t even believe she had the right to speak, much less to say my name.

I swallowed hard, feeling the weight of the moment settle in my chest. The anger I knew I should have—everything I’d been told, everything Cadance had warned me about—sat just beneath the surface. But standing here, seeing her like this, broken and vulnerable... it was hard to hold onto that anger.

"...Luna?" My voice came out rough, almost hesitant, as if speaking her name might unravel whatever fragile calm was holding us both together.

“I... I have some things need to say to you,” Luna murmured, her voice barely more than a whisper.

Author's Note

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, even if it might sound repetitive at points.

Posting as a "rough draft" after a quick read-through, but if you see anything obvious and disgraceful in my grammar or editing, please feel free to let me know.

Just to preemptively answer some of your questions:

Q. Why is the story so slow? Why isn't anything substantial happening? GET ON WITH IT!
A. I'm FUCKING TRYING!

Q. "Why does this chapter feel like therapy? WHY IS EVERYONE STILL CRYING?"
A.

Emotions are a bit complicated for me and I am not the best at writing them. I find myself droning on and on, but I do feel as if the dialogue needed to be there. I'm just hoping the right tone and story is sent. I write best when I'm tired, but I may miss things because I am tired when I write.

Q. "Who hurt you?"
A. Society

Q."When is this going to stop being depressing?"
A. "Soon. Soon. I hope this will help Edgar have something to look forward to. He's had a rough couple of days.

Q. "Are you even taking these questions or this story seriously?"
A. My own questions that I'm doing for a bit, no. However, if you guys have any questions, I'd be more than happy to PM you. I have no qualms about humble-bragging or clarifying things, and if you bring up something that doesn't make sense in the story that I neglected, I'd actually really appreciate that! I love your guy's comments for a reason, and it's not just to stoke my own ego or hear where you think the story is going.

Now here are two questions for you guys:

1.How do you feel about the other ponies and royals so far? I have my own head canon, but I want to make sure it still makes sense for everyone.

Would you guys be against me taking a small hiatus on continuing this story to focus on rewriting the earlier chapters? I feel as if it's turning off a lot of potential new readers and gives the wrong impression due to how dated the lmao meme thing it had going on.

Chapter Fourteen: Total Eclipse of the Heart - 2/2(Rough edit)
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Fourteen: Total Eclipse of the Heart - 2/2(Rough edit)

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.” — Dr. Seuss

For a moment, there was nothing but the sound of water gently lapping against the sides of the bath, steam curling up into the air, making everything hazy and dreamlike. I couldn’t bring myself to look at her. The anticipation clawed at my gut like a living thing, and the longer I waited for her to say something, the worse my anxiety became. I thought I'd done enough thinking, but that was clearly not the case now that the moment arrived. Now that it was happening, now that Luna was right here, close enough to touch, it didn’t feel like I’d expected.

I hated the way I felt—half furious, half... sorry for her. Seeing her so broken made it harder to cling to the anger that I knew should be there.

My heart thudded painfully against my ribs as I sat there, waiting for her to say something. What excuse was she going to offer? What explanation? I thought I was ready for it, thought I could handle hearing whatever she had to say, but every second that passed without her speaking only made the tension worse.

The bathwater rippled as I shifted, glancing down to avoid her gaze. But even her reflection in the water showed a side I hadn’t seen—worn down, as if carrying the weight of her own mistakes. Luna, so regal and confident on the show and even with me before, now looked like someone torn up by choices they couldn’t take back. Maybe Cadance was right; maybe I did have an idea of how that felt.

Maybe that’s why I couldn’t look her in the eye. Not yet.

And then, she spoke.

"May we join thee in the Balneum?"

"Ball-neum?" I blinked, startled out of my thoughts, finally looking up at her more out of confusion than anything.

Luna’s eyes softened, and she pointed to the Lavender waters with an almost pleading look. “There is more than enough room for the both of us. I wish to speak with you from your level. If you choose not to wash me, I would still like to clean myself.” She hesitated, her voice dropping to a whisper. “I feel somewhat dirty... I hope you understand.”

It caught me off guard. I thought it was going to be a lot harder to keep my cool, even if Cadance had given me the best pep talk in Equestria. I felt angry—I should have been more angry—but something else was inside me. Something deeper. I wasn’t ready for that. It was absurd and surreal. Her voice... it wasn’t commanding. It wasn’t regal. It was small, vulnerable, as if she were asking for permission, not from a subject, but from... me.

"Uh, yeah," I managed, my voice coming out awkward and uneven.

Luna stepped in slowly, gracefully even, despite how run-down she looked. The water barely rippled as she descended the steps into the bath. She was right—there was plenty of room for the both of us. I could almost swim in it myself if I wanted. But still, the bath felt more claustrophobic, now that we were together.

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught sight of Twilight, sitting just off to the side, her back turned respectfully, though it was clear she was listening. She hadn’t said much since Luna walked in—hadn’t needed to—but her ears kept flicking toward us at any possible ambient sound, as though waiting for the right moment to speak. I could tell she was struggling, trying to figure out where she fit in. She wasn’t just here as a new friend to me, but she had to be to Luna as well, I'd imagine. She was a mediator, ensuring Luna didn’t twist the truth as she had done before. But even so, it must have felt strange for her, being this close to such an intimate and what I expect to be painful conversation between the two of us.

The silence stretched on, thick and uncomfortable. I could feel her presence next to me, the weight of her gaze pressing down, but I kept staring at the water, unsure of what to say. Before I could collect my thoughts, Luna broke the silence with a tiny, almost wistful smile.

"We... we had hoped to wash thee ourselves," she said, her voice gentle. "But thou had no need for us, it seems."

"Yeah, I had plenty of time." I replied awkwardly, still unsure of how to meet her eyes or what else to say. The bath, for all its vastness, felt smaller with each passing second. "...Cadance told me about this Ablution stuff. Such a weird word...maybe I would have waited if you told me about it in the first place, or about anything really."

Luna’s smile faded, her expression becoming more serious. She sighed, and I could see the tension in her shoulders, the weight of everything she wasn’t saying pressing down on her. "I understand if you do not wish to finish this or even listen," she murmured, her voice quieter now, almost hesitant. "I would like nothing more than for you to forgive us for what we hath done, but it would be selfish. If you would allow it, we need to cleanse ourselves. We have enough stains to bear without the obvious ones."

Her words hung in the air, and I could hear the layers of meaning behind them. It was written all over her—how torn up she was by what she’d done.

My chest tightened as I watched her, torn between anger and a strange pull to reach out, to offer anything that might ease her burden. But after everything, how could I forgive her for putting me through that? How could I trust her?

I shifted uncomfortably, the water rippling slightly around me. “I don’t know how to forgive you. I don’t even know if I'm allowed to be angry.” My voice dropped lower. “I feel like I should be… but I’m just so confused.”

Luna nodded slowly, her gaze dropping to the water again. "You should be angry, Edgar," she whispered, her voice carrying a heavy weight of regret. "You have every right to feel this way. I have wronged you in ways that cannot be excused. I was sure of you to feel worse about what I had done...but even still it hurts me more than I thought it possible."

The quiet admission struck deeper than I expected. There was no defensiveness, no attempt to soften the blow or justify her actions. Just... honesty. It felt strange, hearing her say it like that—almost like she wanted me to feel what I was feeling.

"I only ask that you..." Luna hesitated for a moment, her voice growing even softer. "...grant us the chance to explain ourselves."

I swallowed, my throat dry. It was hard to speak, to even think about what to say next. The anger, the confusion, the hurt—it was all still there, tangled up inside me. But at the same time, seeing her like this... so broken, so lost... it was hard to hold on to. The air between us felt charged, and I could tell she was waiting, watching me for some kind of sign.

"...Start with the lies then." I said finally, my voice steadying as I forced myself to meet her gaze. "If we’re going to do this, I need you to tell me the truth. All of it."

Luna’s eyes flickered with something—relief that I was giving her a chance? Pain of having to walk through this? Maybe both. She nodded, her expression settling into something heavier, as if she had prepared herself for this moment, though it didn’t make what she had to say any easier.

“I owe thee that much,” she whispered, her voice barely more than a murmur. She glanced away, taking a deep breath before looking back at me, her eyes searching mine. “I have lied to thee... many times. In ways both small and terrible. But the greatest lies... were born of fear.”

“Start with the venom,” I said, my voice sharper than I intended. “You said it was going to kill me. That’s why you had to... That's why we had sex. Then Celestia dropped a bombshell that I wasn't gonna die from it. Was that true?”

I tensed, waiting. Of all the things that could have been a lie, I never thought it would be this. The venom. The one thing I thought I could trust. After everything that had happened—the bite, the panic, the fear—this felt like the cruelest betrayal.

“It was dangerous, yes,” Luna began, her voice steady, though I could see her struggling to maintain composure. “Changeling venom, especially from a Queen, is no small matter. Your body could have suffered permanent damage. Loss of certain... functions.” She winced, her words coming out carefully.

I blinked, the reality of her words slowly sinking in. “Wait... so it was dangerous?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. The idea was so absurd I could hardly wrap my head around it.

Luna nodded solemnly. “Yes. At first, we believed that, had you not been treated, it could have caused permanent damage to parts of your anatomy. It might have required amputation.” Her eyes flickered briefly toward Twilight, who had been sitting quietly off to the side. I glanced over, and Twilight gave me a hesitant nod, confirming Luna’s words.

“Twilight knows,” Luna continued. “All the Royals know of it. So much so that our sister offered to assist thee in much the same way last night. This was not a lie.”

I choked on my spit as I tried swallowing the knot in my throat. She said that last night too, but—

“The same Celestia that tried to skewer me?” I choked out, disbelief flooding my voice.

Luna’s expression remained soft, regretful. “Yes. Our sister.” Her voice grew quieter. “But the truth is... before our time together, the venom had ceased to be a true threat. Uncomfortable—yes—but not dangerous. You would have recovered you taken care of it yourself, or perhaps even naturally. We are not entirely sure.”

"And you knew it wasn't...?"

...Luna nodded.

"You lied.” I muttered, my chest tightening with a surge of anger. “You used it against me.”

Luna’s gaze dropped to the water, her ears flattening against her head. “Yes,” she whispered, her voice breaking with shame. “We used it as a weapon against you. We could not risk you saying no.”

I felt my blood run cold. That stung sharper than I had anticipated, leaving me speechless for a moment.

"Risk me saying no" I repeated, my voice shaking. "I...never thought I would hear that as a dude. Did you even care what I'd think?"

"I do care, Edgar. That has never been a lie." Luna nodded, her shoulders trembling. “Yes...please understand. It was not selfishness that drove me but desperation. Last night, you've proven my fears. You kept searching for every reason to reject us. Whether it was about my modesty, finding a way to try and yourself, not wanting to force us into this decision... I could not leave thee a choice. You never would have agreed so long as you had excuses...had fears of what our punishment our sister rend unto thee if we were found together."

I squeezed my hands into fists under the water, knuckles pressing against the smooth tile at the bottom of the bath. I wanted to scream, wanted to lash out—tell her how wrong this all was.

"...That's the crux of this all." Luna continued. "It's why we deceived thee about Celestia's approval...the second lie.”

Luna's words seemed to hover in the air between us, fragile, like they might shatter with the wrong response. My pulse quickened. I clenched my jaw, trying to wrap my mind around what she had just admitted. All this time, I thought the venom had been the cause, the reason for everything that had gone wrong between us—and now, she was telling me it wasn’t the real danger.

She was...

I wanted to shout, to demand more answers, to ask her why she thought any of this was okay. But instead, I bit down on my rising anger, feeling it seethe beneath the surface. Her reasons, however desperate, didn’t make this better. If anything, they made it worse.

"You lied about Celestia," I said, my voice low, trembling with barely restrained fury. I wanted her to feel it, to understand how much that lie had cost me. “You told me she said it was okay. You knew how terrified I was, and you still lied to me.”

Luna flinched, her eyes squeezing shut for a brief moment as though the words themselves had struck her. “I did,” she whispered, her voice thick with regret. “And I am so sorry.”

“Sorry?” I let out a harsh laugh, though it sounded more like a bitter choke. “Do you even know what it was like? I thought... I thought you had some sort of understanding with her. That maybe, just maybe, she was willing to start over, but no! She was going to kill me, Luna! I went from an offer of pancakes to her spea—her halberd getting launched at me! You lied about the venom AND about Celestia, and I almost fucking died because I trusted you!”

Luna trembled, but this time, she didn’t look away. Her eyes, glassy with tears, held mine, full of guilt. She was taking all of this in, letting me vent, letting me say what I needed to say, and it only made the raw anger simmering beneath my skin feel hotter.

"It never would have come to that," she whispered, though the strain in her voice told me she didn’t quite believe her own words. "Your life was in danger, yes, but true harm was not certain. Not so long as the others were there." Luna shook her head, desperation creeping into her voice. “Shining Armor, Cadance, Twilight... I relied on them-"

Twilight cleared her throat loudly.

"...I used them." Luna corrected in a smaller voice. "They are truly good ponies, Edgar, and I knew they would not stand by and let Celestia kill thee without reason. I needed them. Without their intervention, without their belief in you—”

“You gambled my life,” I cut her off, my voice rising with incredulity. “You used them to save me because you couldn’t? Sure, they might've not stood by, but you sure did! Y-You stood there and watched while everything played out. I never felt so weak or so stupid, or so useless!”

“If I had intervened, Edgar...” Luna’s voice cracked, her wings trembling at her sides. “If I had stepped in, Celestia would have all but confirmed that I wasn't thinking clearly. She would have seen me as compromised, as acting irrationally because of you. I... I couldn't risk that.” Her words came out rushed, her breathing quickening as she tried to explain herself. "If she had even the slightest reason I was too far gone to allow her to attempt to save me, if I was as unreasonable as I had been over one-thousand years ago, it would have only confirmed her worst fears about you. It would have certainly doomed you."

I wanted to shout back, to tell her how wrong she was, but something in her voice gave me pause. I gritted my teeth, the bubbling fury mixing with a deep, unsettling confusion. "You put me in that position on purpose," I muttered.

Luna’s breath hitched, and she gave a slow, almost imperceptible nod. “Yes,” she whispered, her voice breaking. "I... I didn’t know what else to do. I needed you to be the victim, for their sake, for your sake, so that I could put her under the Geis.”

I shook my head at the victim comment to try and get myself back on track.

“The Geis?” I frowned, my anger momentarily faltering in the face of confusion.

“An ancient spell.” Luna repeated softly, her eyes flicking up to meet mine. “ An enchantment to some, a curse to others. One I could only cast because the other Royals—their will to protect you—formed a majority. I couldn’t act, but they could. They tipped the balance, and it allowed me to place that Geis on Celestia to ensure she can no longer harm you.”

"So to force them to save me with this...geis...you made me look weak.” I said, my voice tight with disbelief. “You stood there and let me think you weren't doing anything to help me, knowing that it would make the others step in? That they’d see me as pathetic enough to side with me over Celestia?”

Luna’s shoulders trembled as she nodded, her gaze dropping to the floor. “Yes. It tore me apart to watch, Edgar. To see you suffer and be unable to act. But I knew... I knew that if I did, Celestia would have killed you. The only reason she didn’t is because deep down, Celestia still doubted herself. Doubted whether killing you was truly necessary. I’ve known my sister for centuries before our banishment, and I could feel it.”

I let out a bitter laugh, shaking my head.

“You think she was doubting herself while she was presenting her manifesto on the massacre of every human who makes a pit stop here after me?” I asked. "Fuck. That."

“I know it’s hard to see, Edgar,” Luna murmured, her voice trembling. “But yes. I know my sister. She was trying to convince herself more than anyone else. I watched her cling to any reason, any excuse to justify not killing you. Her doubts were real, and they’re the only reason you’re alive. She is...very strong.”

"That's bullshit..." I swallowed hard, trying to make sense of what she was saying. My mind was racing, caught between the raw anger and the sudden, painful realization that maybe—just maybe—Luna was right. As twisted as it all was, maybe Celestia hadn’t wanted to kill me. But that didn’t change the fact that she could have, or still tried to.

“What if they haven't stepped in?” I asked, my voice quieter now, though the accusation was still there. “Shining Armor pulled a sword on me when he first saw me. What if none of them had stepped in? Would you have still just let it happen?”

Luna was openly crying now, tears spilling down her cheeks, but her voice remained steady as she explained herself. "I did what I could to save you, Edgar," she whispered, her voice shaking with regret but resolute. "I had to trust the others—Shining Armor, Cadance, Twilight. I had to believe they would step in, that they would see what was truly happening and protect you. But if, for even a moment, I thought you were in the truest danger, I would have stepped in myself. I would have broken my vow to never fight Celestia again."

She paused, her voice thick with emotion. "I love my sister deeply, and I swore after everything that happened between us that I would never raise my hoof against her again. We love each other too much to truly harm one another... but this was different. The stakes were so high. I could not sit idly by if your life was truly at risk." Her wing rose from the water to wipe her tears but they kept flowing. She looked at me, her eyes filled with guilt, determination, and something else—something raw. "If Celestia had come any closer, if she had truly meant to kill you, I would have broken every vow. I would have begged for your life. I would have admitted it was all my fault, that I lied, that I did everything to manipulate the situation to protect you."

Luna’s voice trembled as she continued, "When Celestia... when she tipped her weapon in your blood, I almost broke. I was ready to stop it all, to do whatever it took. But then Twilight..." Luna’s voice softened, a hint of relief in her tone, "Twilight stepped in. She was the last voice of reason, the one who tipped the balance. Without her and the bond our sister and Twilight have, I couldn’t have exercised the Geis on Celestia. Twilight saved us Edgar. She saved myself, you, and Celestia from making a terrible mistake. So long as you remain my Consort, my sister can't hurt you."

The weight of her confession pressed heavily on me, and despite the anger that still simmered inside, I could feel my defenses cracking. She hadn’t just stood by to watch me suffer—she had been trapped, just like me, forced to rely on others to save us both. Still, it didn’t erase the pain of her lies or the sense of betrayal I felt deep inside.

“I still don't know what a Royal Consort is...” I asked, quieter than I’d intended. “Why keep me in the dark? Why not give me a choice or tell me what you wanted to do?”

Luna looked away for a moment, Her ears flattening and her jaw tightening as if she were struggling to find the right words. Luna swallowed hard, her tear-streaked face crumpling under the weight of my question. For a moment, she couldn’t meet my eyes. Her gaze fell to the rippling water between us, and I could almost see the wheels turning in her mind, struggling to find the right words. When she finally spoke, her voice was soft but steady, laced with regret.

“I didn’t give you a choice because... it wouldn’t have mattered in the end,” she admitted, her voice a quiet tremor. “If you had said Yes, it would have only made things worse. You would have been seen as a conspirator—manipulating me for your own gain. Celestia, the other royals... they would have believed the worst about you. You would have become the very thing they feared—a guileful coward, using me as a hostage to protect yourself, just as she accused you of using Princess Twilight Sparkle as....”

Her words stung, but I let her continue. There was more she needed to say. More that I needed to hear.

“And if you had said no...” Luna’s voice cracked slightly, her eyes flicking up to meet mine."...then you would have been left vulnerable, Edgar," Luna finished, her voice barely more than a whisper. "Without the protection of your status as my Consort—without the geis on my sister, Celestia would have felt free to act as she saw was necessary. You would have been left to the mercy of her past... I couldn't risk that. I couldn't allow you to face her alone, unprotected, knowing what might happen if she perceived you as even a slight threat. I thought... that if you didn’t know, you would remain blameless. A victim, forced into this position. They wouldn’t hate you. You would have protection—perhaps even sympathy. If you couldn’t make the choice, then you couldn’t be condemned for it."

I stared down at the water, the ripples scattering my tangled thoughts across the surface. What Luna had done… in a twisted way, it made sense. But I hated how she’d done it, how she’d decided that I had to be the victim.

Luna watched me, her eyes filled with what looked like genuine remorse, but I could only shake my head. “You made me look pathetic... I was naked and afraid..."

Luna’s ears flattened, her gaze dropping back to the water. “I understand if you feel angered, Edgar. You should. There’s no excuse I can give you that will make this right. What I did was wrong… but I couldn’t let Celestia harm you. I needed you to be safe.”

“Why!? Did it ever cross your mind to just tell me the truth? To give me a choice?” I demanded.

Her face fell. “If you’d known, Edgar, what would you have done? Tell us truthfully.”

I opened my mouth to answer, but stopped, the words suddenly caught in my throat. I didn’t know. Maybe I would’ve tried to run, or maybe I’d have faced down Celestia and ended up skewered... But I can't get that moment from just before she found us out of my head. “I thought… maybe there was a chance to prove myself? Get on her good side. Am I stupid for thinking that?"

Luna hesitated, her voice faltering, and I saw the flicker of sadness in her eyes. “I… I do not know, Edgar,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “She is a good pony, truly, but… fear can change even the kindest of hearts. I did not expect her compassion this morning. That wasn't an act, and she seemed ready to give you that chance. She was willing to see you as more than a threat, more than… whatever her past has made her believe about humans. But when she found us together…”

Her words trailed off, and a pang of regret twisted in my chest. “So… I ruined it because we fucked,” I muttered bitterly.

“No, Edgar,” Luna’s voice was firm, her gaze intense. “You did not ruin anything. I made that choice. I was the one who put us in that position. If there is blame to be had, it is mine alone.” Her voice softened, a hint of sorrow in her tone. “I fear… I may have shattered whatever trust my sister might have had in us. And for that, I am truly sorry.”

The silence weighed heavy in the air, broken only by the occasional drip of water echoing off the smooth tile. I looked at Luna, feeling a mix of emotions so tangled I couldn’t even name half of them. She’d gone so far—too far—to protect me. Or so she kept saying. But what if this ‘protection’ was just her way of justifying something else, something my touch had twisted??

I took a slow breath, keeping my voice as steady as I could. “Luna… why did you do all of this? I mean… making me a ‘Royal Consort.’ I still don’t even know what that means.”

Luna’s expression softened, and before she could respond, Twilight’s voice broke in from the edge of the bath. “The basic idea is that you’re… well, her royal colt-friend on paper,” she said gently. “Legally, you’re exclusive to her—only her—unless she gives permission otherwise. Normally, that means that ponies are barred from even touching you in a suggestive manner without her consent.” Twilight frowned, looking away as if searching for the right words. “But even I can’t say what else it means for you yet. Each consort’s contract is unique when drafted and usually tailored for the consort and the initiating royal, by the rest of the royals. You don't have one yet.”

“So, I’m gonna be bound to you and whatever rules they decide?” I asked, my voice sharper than I intended. “You put a leash on me by lying to me! That’s what all of this was for? So you can have a pet colt-friend that you can train?!?”

“We would neverdo-" Luna started to raise her voice in frustration, but stopped herself with a hoof to her mouth when she saw how she startled me. She looked horrified for a moment before turning away from me. She took a deep breath in and out, shutting her eyes as she took a moment to calm herself. "We're...I'm sorry, Edgar. That wasn't right. You don't deserve that from us but we beg of thee...Please don't say I would wish to use you or own you. I don't." She spoke with a restrained, quiet voice that seemed to strain against her.

Through sheer will, I uncurled my hands away from the edge of the tub and forced myself to calm my nerves, and take a deep breath.

"I made you my consort to protect you and others...” she began, her voice soft but unwavering. She looked away as if gathering her thoughts. “I thought of Trixie,” she continued, her voice a bit unsteady. “Her behavior toward you became intense quickly, Edgar. At the time, I didn’t understand why, and I feared what might happen if other ponies developed feelings for you too—feelings too quickly that they might not be able to control. I… I acted out of a mix of motives, but I feared other ponies feelings for thee. I believed that I could weather the affects of your touch, since I knew full well what it was like to be corrupted by overwhelming emotions, but our niece seems to have...” She trailed off, clearly struggling with how to explain it. "I know now that there may be something real behind what I felt for thee, even if it is complicated and hard to express."

...So not only is Celestia under magical restraining order, but everyone else who would attempt to touch me is under a legal restraining order, it sounds like. This is...surprisingly well thought out, given how little time she had to enact this little scheme. I was having a hard time arguing, but...even if it almost made sense, I don't know if I can accept it.

"Did Luna tell you all the same thing?" I turned to Twilight, only to be answered by a quiet nod. "...Luna said she likes me?" Twilight gave another sad nod and I felt my heart drop into my stomach. “I just don't know what to believe..." I said, though my voice had softened as I turned back to Luna. "The times when we were together, I felt so happy when I was with you. Maybe I was too quick..."

I was half-way hoping Twilight would step in and call out a lie Luna told somewhere in the middle of all this, but no. Luna liked me back, and that makes this a whole lot worse.

I thought that maybe there was something real between us. But now that I was seeing Luna’s true motivations, the situation seemed twisted and complicated.

I shifted slightly, folding my arms, a futile attempt to keep something grounded in all of this.

“The worst part is, I don't think I can blame you. Not when we know about my "touch" in the first place. How can you or I believe your feelings are real? You were trying to talk me out of liking you this morning, but you still showered me with affection. I still felt like you wanted something more...That's still my "touch", right?" I paused, pressing my lips together, like maybe holding back could keep me from slipping. "So how can I know if you even believe there is something real there in all this? What was it you called it? A "beautiful lie"?”

Luna’s expression softened, the vulnerability in her eyes deepening as she looked at me. “I know how it must look,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “It must seem as though I’ve used you, ensnared you… and you are right to question it. But what we shared feels real to me, even if I tried to deny it...” She looked down, a sadness weighing in her gaze. “If it is all due to your touch, then I am foolish to hope otherwise.” She looked back up, her voice steady yet soft, filled with quiet determination. “But, Edgar, I swear… I would never bind you in a way that you couldn’t escape. If you wish to have nothing to do with me after this, I would understand. If, one day, when you are able to leave… I will not hold you back if you choose to do so."

Luna's body raises higher from the water and she held her hoof against the red teeth marks I left on her chest. "Everything we have done was for thine best intentions in mind. No matter how awful it was for thee, know we would have put ourselves in your position if we could. This is not a lie either, and we did our best to make sure you were not punished for our choices... Even if these feelings are false as my sister had warned, this is the least could do for one as selfless as thee. ”

If her words didn't strike me like a bolt, her pointing to that bite mark did. My hand went back to my own mark back on my shoulder muscle, and I started to get a clearer picture of why this was all happening in the first place. All I could feel was a rising wave of… guilt and shittiness.

We fucked...we bonded... and we ruined things. She ruined things for a "selfless hero".

She still thinks I'm a mighty swordsmen, and just being with me forced her to into a situation where she couldn't back down. She put so much faith in me, seeing me as some hero who deserved her protection. She lied, but at least it was for a better reason than when I did. I was too much of a coward to tell them the truth...

I feel like a fraud compared to her.

I swallowed hard.

"You messed up Luna...You made the wrong choice in trying to protect me..." My throat tightened, and it was almost impossible to force the words out. “Luna, Twilight… I—”

"Can I speak?" Twilight interrupted me with a fast request, and the words died in my throat again.

Twilight’s ears flicked before she cleared her throat and filling the gap left by our silence. She turned back to us with a thoughtful expression, yet she still seemed conflicted. It was like she was struggling to figure out how to say whatever was on her mind. When Luna’s eyes finally met hers, Twilight spoke.

“I think...Luna did tell another lie just now,” Twilight said carefully, her voice steady but tinged with a hint of sorrow. Luna’s puffy eyes widened slightly. "I’m sorry, Luna,” Twilight said softly, “but it’s the only way forward for both of you. He needs to know what you were feeling… all of it.”

Luna flinched, like Twilight’s words had cut her more deeply than anything I’d said so far. The muscles in her neck began tensing as if bracing for another blow.

“I think Luna did lie when she said she did all of this only to protect you.” Her eyes didn’t leave Luna’s, and I could see the hurt and the conflict reflected in her gaze. “I believe she was trying to protect you—she’s proven that time and again—but I think she also wanted to protect herself.”

Luna’s breathing quickened, and her ears flattened as Twilight’s words sank in.

“Luna, you were afraid for him, but I also think you were afraid of what would happen if you didn't do anything when you knew you could.” Twilight’s voice softened, and I could hear the sadness there. “You were afraid of the guilt, of the heartbreak, of feeling powerless if something happened to him.”

I watched Luna's face as Twilight kept talking. She looked sad before...but now she looked worse.

Twilight pressed on. “I understand... It’s terrifying.” She looked down, as if recalling a painful memory of her own. “I already told you what happened. I was forced to either drop the shield and let my friends be taken by the changelings or watch friends outside be tortured and killed one by one. In Hindsight, I still don't know if I made the right choice. If it was just me putting myself at risk, I'd do it in a heartbeat, but it wasn't just me. Anything would have been better than knowing you had the power to protect somepony and not do anything. You made your decision because you were afraid of feeling the same pain and guilt.”

Luna’s expression crumpled, her ears flattening against her head as she turned away. I could see her struggling, her wings fluttering against the water as if she was trying to find a way to escape the room.

“When Cadance confronted you, she said you were being selfish and that you weren’t thinking about Edgar in that moment. It didn't make sense to me at first, but after arguing with Princess Celestia and hearing your reasons now, I think I get it; Sometimes, fear and grief... they change us. They make us act out of desperation. And good ponies, even princesses, can end up doing bad things if they think they have to.”

Luna’s eyes began to water. She opened her mouth to respond, but no words came out. Instead, she looked down at the water, her body trembling. “I... I—” she choked, and before she could finish, her hooves went to her eyes. She covered them, and quiet sobs escaped her.

She looked back at Luna, her eyes searching, her tone gentle but firm. "You did your best to save him the only way you thought you could. You told us earlier that you were the only pony that'd be punished for her actions, who'd suffer for them, and that's when Cadance slapped you. I think you want to be right, but it wasn't just you hurt by this. It wasn't just us or Trixie either. You really hurt the stallion you were trying to protect.”

Twilight must have hit the nail right on the head.

The sound of Princess Luna's wails filled the room, and it was the most gut-wrenching thing I’d heard. Luna, who had always seemed so strong and composed, who had saved me countless times, now looked completely shattered. The sobs were raw, and they echoed off the bathroom walls, cutting through the steam and the silence. She whispered and choked, “I’m sorry... I’m so sorry,” over and over, almost like she was speaking to herself as much as to us.

"Luna..."I clenched my jaw, staring hard at the water as her apologies continued to echo around us. The sight of her breaking down like this... It felt wrong. It felt unfair. It felt heart-wrenching.

Everything I went through felt small compared to what she's going through. Luna’s flipped her life upside-down for my sake. She didn't want me to die, and she’d thrown herself into this because she thought I was some kind of hero. She thought that much of me.

I’d felt weak, terrified, helpless... but was it fair to weigh that against everything Luna had sacrificed? I’d told her a story that was barely half-true, and now she was the one carrying the burden of it.

Twilight’s voice brought me back to the present, her tone gentle, almost pleading. “Edgar... I know this doesn’t fix things, and I’m not asking you to forgive her, but she's not a bad pony. She's just...afraid, and made a lot of mistakes. Whether it’s love, friendship, or just duty, she really does seem to care about you. Cadance wouldn't have considered leaving you alone with her if she thought otherwise." She paused, glancing back at Luna, who was still wiping tears from her eyes. "Even if we are all having a very hard time trusting her right now, we can't say she lied about that, and maybe that’s enough for now. Enough to start moving forward from all of this.”

I clenched my jaw, forcing myself to breathe, to keep my emotions in check. The room felt too claustrophobic now, and everything felt like a mess.

I want things to go back to how I thought Equestria would be like. Even if Celestia wasn't the Celestia I was expecting, she was still Celestia to these ponies.

Twilight was still Twilight, and Luna...she's still Luna.

...

I wiped my eyes.

What the hell could I do to fix what I broke just by being here?

...

No answers came to mind as I listened to Luna sob. Eventually, the crying finally slowed to a halt.

After a few more moments of tense, overbearing silence later Luna spoke once more, sniffling as she had done so in attempts to regain her composure.

"...M-may I have the bottle of shampoo?" she asked gently, her eyes flicking toward the shampoo sitting beside me. "You know the "why" of it now. I would not ask you to wash me, but... I would still like to cleanse myself. I don't want to walk back like this." The tension between us was thick, and I could feel the weight of her waiting—waiting for something from me. Forgiveness, understanding, maybe just a sign that I wasn't as angry with her as I was trying to make myself. "I won't bother thee any further...I promise."

I wanted to try and force myself to speak, but it was like I was frozen. Soon, a purple glow started to envelop the bottle as Twilight’s magic carefully lifted it, making my choice for me and begging me to do something...stupid.

The lavender shampoo didn’t make it more than a foot away before my arm reflexively shot out to grab it. My fingers clumsily closed around it, pulling it back toward me, earning surprised looks from Twilight, who had suddenly turned toward me after feeling her grip disappear.

"E-Edgar?" Twilight asked, her voice uncertain, her ears twitching nervously.

I stared at the bottle in my hands for a moment, my heart hammering in my chest. Even with an audience of two, it felt like too much, but I forced myself to act.

"Don't worry Twilight. L-Luna can have it in a moment after I-ayyy What The Fuck!?!"

With a small flick of my wrist, I purposefully let the bottle slip out of my hand as I kept fumbling it purposefully clumsy, juggling it with my palms instead of grabbing it. Thick, gooey shampoo squirted out all over the place—across the tub, my arms, shoulder, even my head once again. I let it happen, watching as the lavender foam spread like some kind of ridiculous accident.

"AAAAH jeeeez. Knyoh fuch! " I shouted, pretending to struggle with the bottle. "Fucking... Jinkies. Thought I could grab some more before handing it over, but...NO, GOD DAMN IT!" I gave the bottle another fumble, letting more shampoo ooze out as I half-caught it only to let it slip out of my hands again like a soap. "None of you have fingers! Why the hell did you make these bottles so slippery!?"

I felt like I was starring in a live-action version of The Three Stooges, pulling a slapstick routine right here in the tub. Shampoo flew everywhere, landing in Luna's wings, on the walls—hell, I was half-expecting the gel to land in my own eyes, but thankfully most landed all over me.

"...Edgar, what the hay are you doing?" Twilight asked, annoyed but trying to keep a straight face. "This isn't the time for this, so stop touching the bottle so I can help—" her voice started to trail off after she realized what I was doing...before a smile made it's way onto her face.

"Shut up, Twilight! I'm trying to concentrate...GOT IT!" I finally got hold of the bottle once more, but I squeezed it as hard as I can possibly can, letting it the gel spurt out like a sooper-soaker and squirt across the water. I meant to aim it in an arc over Luna's head and onto her back, but instead it pooled into a small swirly pile on the top of Luna's head before it started to almost melt and slid down either side of her mane.

Luna blinked, watching the shampoo drip down my arms and shoulders, her bewildered expression softening. It was like she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. She didn’t seem to mind the pile cascading down her mane. Although her eyes twitched reflexively at the droplets that landed near them, they stayed fixated on me as they following the slow trail of lavender shampoo as it slid down my shoulders and into the water.

"...Fuck...Sorry Luna. I've gone and made a mess of things." I muttered, glancing over at her with a dramatic whine. "...And I just got clean too. It's going to take forever to "Ab-lute" myself and clean this out of my hair... I've only been here for like an hour' and a half, but it feels like I've been in this bath for fucking months, and now I still have to wallow in cleanliness and lavender?!?" I pointed at the very small streams of gel sliding down my own hair, letting the ridiculous complaint hang in the air compared to Luna's own shampoo waterfall. "...I don't know what to do..."

My eyes flicked up to meet hers, feeling my heart beat just a little faster as I hoped she would catch on.

Luna’s eyes widened slightly, and the corner of her mouth twitched, like she was holding back a smile. The tension between us disappeared a little, and the air felt lighter than it had since she walked in. She seemed to understand what I was doing—what I was offering.

“Perhaps... we could assist thee?" Luna’s eyes softened, the hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "If thoust would allow.”

I paused for a moment, then gave her a slight nod. “Yeah, maybe.” It wasn’t an answer to everything—not yet—but it was something. "You're a mess yourself...and a big mare. If you still can't use magic...then maybe I can help you and make things quicker. I should probably clean that bite too."

Her lips twitched, trying to settle on either a soft smile or something more restrained. For a moment, her vulnerability cracked, replaced by the faintest glimmer of amusement.

Twilight, watching the scene unfold, raised an eyebrow but kept her tone soft. “Are you sure, Edgar? You know this is—it's not legally or magically binding for you, but... it's important. You're forgiving each other, and saying that you'll willing to move past things.” She glanced between us with quiet apprehension, clearly concerned about what this meant. "Even if you both didn't think of each other like that, you'd still be each other's special somepony in spirit."

I let out a wry chuckle, swirling a bit of the soapy water with my finger. “Oh, believe me, Twilight, I’m well aware. If the look Cadance gave me when I called this a fancy bath was any indication...”

Luna’s eyes widened, then she snorted—a sound so uncharacteristic and unexpected that her hoof flew up to cover her mouth, her eyes crinkling in amusement. “You did not say that in front of our niece.” she finally guffawed, barely keeping a small chuckle at bay.

“Yeah.” I tried to hold back a smile of my own as I looked at her, noticing how the laughter softened her face, even if just for a second. “You know, I still like your smile. I'd like to see it more.” I added quietly, feeling a bit of my own tension ease as I said it.

Luna’s mirth faded, replaced by a subtle yet visible guilt in her gaze. The hint of laughter had vanished as fast as it had come, and I could tell by the way she held herself that she didn’t want to mess up whatever else needed to happen... It made it clear to me that this Ablution had to happen.

Twilight cleared her throat, her tone thoughtful but direct. “Well, if you’re sure...” Twilight gave me a skeptical look, then levitated a spare loofah over with her magic and tossed it at me, letting it splash into the water near my arm. “Well then, why don’t you start with this?” she said with a faint, knowing smile.

Luna began to wade towards me, but I still felt a strange apprehension, which grew as she drew nearer. I tried keeping a straight face, but... It still felt like something was off to me. That there was something missing. When she finally was touching distance, she gave me a tentative expression, then pressed the loofah gently against my arm.

I pulled back, the action appearing to both surprise Twilight and seemingly hurting them both.

This still wasn't right... Not when I'm the reason this all happened in the first place.

If this "ablution" is so important for them, if it was to be supposed to be about accepting our past and forgiving each other, than it didn't feel right doing this. Not while I haven't been honest either.

I swallowed hard, forcing the words out.

“I want to trust you, Luna,” I said quietly, my voice rough with emotion. “I want to make things right between us. I want to believe that the Luna loved hearing about Batman, or the Luna that invited me to Nightmare Night... that she’s still here and real.”

Luna looked up at me through her tears. “I-I'm still here, Edgar,” she whispered. “And I... I want to be a better friend to you. I vowed this to you as you slept peacefully...”

Look at her.... trying so hard. It wasn’t fair to keep letting her shoulder this alone. It hurt to see her like this. Broken and torn up, and guilty while I stayed quiet. I can't deny that she sacrificed a lot for me, I didn’t deserve the kind she was willing to make.

"But it's not fair to ask that of you if I can't even tell you the truth about me either..." I finally got out.

Twilight’s eyes widened, and she leaned forward slightly, her face showing a mixture of surprise and concern. The bath felt stifling, and I struggled to find my voice, feeling the weight of the lie, the weight of everything that had brought me here.

...But there was no turning back now. If telling them cost me... then maybe that was what I’d earned. It was time to be a little more honest with myself.

"I think that you only feel things for me..." I cleared my throat, forcing myself to continue. “That you only did this in the first place because you thought I was… well, some hero. I told you I took down a whole changeling invasion on my own… but I didn’t.” The words felt bitter on my tongue, and I could feel the shame creeping up my neck. “I was an idiot who acted without thinking, and the only reason Ponyville is still standing is because of my dumb luck.” I looked down, unable to meet their eyes as I went on. “Luna… you still had to save me. I was still helpless without you. I let you think I was a hero...but I lied. It was all just a car.”

As the confession slipped out, I felt my heart drop. The realization hit me like a punch to the gut: everything that had gone wrong—it was because of me. Luna had ruined her relationships with the other royals, placed a curse on her own sister, and bound us both in this twisted, desperate pact. All of this, and for what? Some "badass" who didn’t even exist...

I wasn’t a mighty warrior worth risking anything over. I was just a guy who’d been lucky enough to survive, propped up by
piece of machinery and a bizarre coincidence. If I’d told the truth from the start, Luna wouldn’t have needed to do any of it. Luna might have still been nice and understanding to me, and Celestia might have still given me a chance to prove myself. The other royals wouldn't have been so angry at her for what she did. She wouldn’t even have needed to feel like protecting me in the first place.

It was all my fault...

I could barely bring myself to look at her, my voice coming out low and raw. “Luna, all of this… it probably wouldn’t have happened if I’d just told you the truth. I never wanted to… to drag you into my mess, to make you ruin things with Celestia. I just wanted to feel like a hero. I didn’t deserve any of this… not your protection, not your trust, and not your apologies. None of it. I'm so sorry.”

"...Is that all?" Luna asked.

I braced myself for anger, for disappointment. Instead, I noticed Twilight and Luna exchange a silent nod, like they’d come to some quiet understanding. When I finally met Luna’s gaze, expecting resentment, all I saw was something steady, even gentle—a quiet understanding in her eyes.

“Edgar,” she murmured softly, her voice calm, “We knew.”

My mouth opened and closed without making a sound. My mind reeled, and I couldn’t quite comprehend what she was saying. “W-what?” I stammered, stunned.

Luna nodded, but before she could speak, Twilight began with her soft but thoughtful tone. “I had… a theory,” she said, glancing at Luna before looking back at me. “Scarlett Blush’s report described the scenes in detail, including the deep tracks your… Miniature locomotive left in the dirt and grass, and the damage it sustained.” She hesitated, choosing her words carefully. “It didn’t line up with what you said about fighting them directly. The changelings’ remains have massive cracks, as if hit by a tree. When combined with that… machine part you mentioned having a changeling horn stuck inside it...a Kam-shaft, I think was how it was written, it made me think… maybe you had some help.”

Luna nodded in agreement, her expression gentle but knowing. “And I, too, had my suspicions when we first met, but it didn't matter.” she continued. “The filly you rescued had a nightmare later in the night. It was abstract, a blend of terror and awe, but one image was clear: a figure standing between her and an awful smile, at great risk to himself. One that she begged not to give up as she was trapped in a glass cage. ” She paused, a hint of sadness in her eyes. “Edgar, I have fought changelings myself. I know their tactics. I did not truly think you could have held off their forces by might alone...but it didn't matter to me.”

I stared at her, uncomprehending. “But… then why?” The words came out choked, thick with disbelief and shame. “Why would you go so far?”

Luna’s expression softened, her gaze gentle and unwavering. She seemed to consider moving closer but held her distance, her eyes full of quiet understanding. “Bravery… isn’t something measured by victories alone,” she began softly. “Sometimes it’s simply having the resolve to stand your ground when nopony else can, to protect others even when there’s every reason to turn away.”

Her voice lowered, carrying a warmth that softened the words. “You may not see yourself as a hero, Edgar. But that little filly in Ponyville does. During her nightmare, she called out for the ones she trusts. Her sister, her brother... and the ‘hoo-man’. ” Her gaze lingered on mine, sadness flickering in her eyes. “She wanted you to save her because she believes in you. That is what it means to inspire others. To give hope, to make others feel less alone.”

Luna’s voice wavered, a quiet admiration filling her words. “I may have doubted the details of your story, yes. But knowing that you risked yourself for her—for them... that, to me, is heroism."

She took a deep, steadying breath, her eyes steady on mine. “From yesterday to now, I believed that my desire had been to protect you… from dangers you may not even see, things you cannot always protect yourself from. You have already proven you can protect others, Edgar… and that you would risk your own life to do it. But you shouldn’t have to face it all alone. Even if you do not love me as you thought anymore, I would still stand by you, to save you from what you cannot always see. Nopony should be without somepony who can protect them, whom they can trust.”

Luna held up the loofah once more, her expression fragile but hopeful. "Please, Edgar. Let us be that mare for thee." Her voice was barely a whisper, carrying the weight of her apology and, maybe, her longing for something more.

I looked at my own. The steam didn't seem to strangle us anymore, and instead curled around us in a strange, quiet intimacy. Even now, a part of me was hesitant. Sure, we’d been through… well, everything in such a short time. The highest highs, the deepest lows. But did that mean I was ready for whatever this “Royal Consort” thing was? Especially when it all happened so fast? Just me touching her might be messing this up.

...

So I took a slow, steady breath.

"Luna, I thought I wanted to spend more time with you, and I thought that I was falling in love with you, but after what happened because of us, I don't know. Maybe you had a point that I should have been giving this more thought. It’s too soon to start thinking of ourselves like "special someponies" right now." The words hung in the air, and I could see her face fall, just a fraction, her eyes darting down to the loofah in my hands. That fragile hope started to flicker out, and she bit her lip as if to hold back a response.

Then, without another word, I pressed the sponge to her coat. “But maybe… if it's okay with you, maybe we could try something a little easier first.” She blinked, her eyes lifting to meet mine, that sadness slowly melting into confusion. “Like friends?” I offered, quirking a tentative smile.

The bath was quiet for a moment, then I watched as her expression softened, a glimmer of something warm and hesitant breaking through. "Friends," she echoed, her voice thick with relief and—was that hope?

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Twilight smile. Maybe it was relief, maybe she was just glad that the tension was starting to let up. Either way, she didn’t interfere, just watched with that thoughtful look that meant she was filing away notes or getting ready to share some “insight” on friendship later.

“Yes… Yes, Edgar, I… I would like that very much.” Luna agreed. She pressed her own Loofah into my chest...and we got started cleaning each other.

Being mostly skin and some hair, it took Luna almost zero time to clean me from the shampoo I spilt on us.

The issue was with me cleaning her, but not because it was hard.

I could have finished washing Luna a while ago, and I know that I should have. She's got to get some sleep, and her mane and coat could shimmer under the nearly pristine bath water if I choose to stop. But something felt oddly therapeutic about washing her. She even gave me tips on how to preen her as well...which is also something that close friends do, apparently.

I almost completed a full circle around her at this point, I felt myself finding more reasons to slow down before it was finished. Each stroke of the brush, the loofah, and even my fingers combing through her mane and tail felt like I was less trying to scrub away any dirt from her once pristine coat, but more about exploring each other further and showing our trust.

Luna was oddly quiet now. She had been during the whole process, not including her instructions on wing care and identifying what should be cleaned and what she should take care of herself. It was my first time washing a pony, so I just took everything in stride as best I can and assumed this was normal.

She didn't seem upset anymore though. Even her breathing became more steady, though the air between us was still thick with things she still wanted to say, I guess. I could feel her tension loosening under my touch, but she was getting more and more relaxed around me, and her eyes were no longer strained or puffy. In fact, she was starting to look more and more beautiful as her hair hung low and floated in the surface of the water.

Maybe there was something to this "fancy bath".

Finally, I came face to face I combed my fingers through her mane one last time, to confirm that no more dirt or "me" was hidden anywhere. I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I was holding, placing the cloth down beside me. “There. You’re clean now.”

“Oh, that’s great, Edgar!” Twilight exclaimed. The poor mare hadn’t seemed to know quite what to do with herself the entire time we were washing each other, just sitting in the corner twiddling her hooves, whistling and staring at the ceiling.

From the glances she exchanged with Luna, I could tell she knew this was supposed to be a private moment, but she was here because of the “circumstances.” The whole time, she was trying her best to be both helpful and unobtrusive, bless her heart. And yet...she just couldn’t help herself—and continued backseat cleaning for me and for Luna.

Be gentle with the horn, being respectful around our "genitals"(much to our chagrin), and offering up other brands of shampoos and coat washes she has in the cupboards...And yes, they were still all lavender-scented.

Having her here wasn't all bad though, since Twilight watching us was a good excuse to not get carried away...even if it was a bit distracting to have her watching us. At least she wasn't making a big deal about it, and I could tell that she was just being a good friend to both of us. Additionally, as it was related, she's even been doing her best to make sure I understood that a "Royal Consort contract" as they called it, wasn't supposed to be nefarious or anything. She bounced a couple ideas my way, with the the stuff ranging from not doing crimes to learning more about equestrian culture. It almost sounded like a "don't be a dick" agreement. Luckily, I think I have a better idea than most people would anyway, even if my MLP knowledge seemed a bit lacking in comparison to how complicated this world felt. Twilight had been so patient and supportive so far, and I was grateful for her presence.

You'd think she was the Princess of Friendship or something.

"Let's test it out. Can you use your magic now, Luna?" Twilight asked.

Luna appeared to hesitate, and suddenly her horn started to glow. She used her magic to turn on the showerhead and rinse us off one last time. "...I see. We're done already."

"I guess we are. Should I help you dry off?" I asked her.

Luna's wings started twitching nervously at her sides as she looked down at the water, gathering her thoughts. After a long pause, her horn glowed once more, and suddenly Twilight's started to as well.

A few moments went by, but then, Twilight seemed to nod her head.

"Edgar..." She began cautiously, her eyes searching mine with a mixture of vulnerability and longing. "Before I leave, I have one last request. Just once more... before we part, may I hold thee?

“You want to hug me?” I asked. "Is that going to be a problem, Twilight?"

Twilight looked between us, her expression a mix of uncertainty and hope. “I… I don’t know, Edgar. You’ve touched each other quite a bit while cleaning each other, but… a hug?” Her eyes shifted to Luna, who was staring at her with a quiet intensity. Twilight’s brow furrowed, and then her magic enveloped the loofahs and soap bars, floating them gently towards the edge of the tub where they landed with a soft clink.

Twilight glanced back at me, her eyes meeting mine for a brief moment before she gave a small nod. “It’s okay, I think,” she said hesitantly, but her words carried a hint of conviction. “If you want to give her a hug, Edgar, I won’t stop you. This is important for the both of you.”

Luna’s ears perked, and I saw her gaze soften as she looked back at me. “Please, Edgar,” she said, a faint tremor in her voice. "We feel we may not have another chance for a while at least.” Her eyes shone with something like hope.

"Are you sure, though? I mean—what if it’s just my touch, messing with you??” The words felt awkward, but they needed to be said. “How do you know if this is real?”

Luna’s expression softened as she stepped closer. “Even so…” Her gaze flicked down, her voice dropping to a murmur. “I know that I feel, Edgar. I know that I do care. And if my feelings may be exaggerated… all the same, I wish to offer you comfort.” She lifted her head, her voice growing steadier. “And perhaps, selfishly, I’d like to feel your warmth one more time. I won’t beg, but if you feel the same… please, let us both have this small reprieve. Just once more, I wish to hold thee.”

The moment stretched between us, filled with unspoken emotions and lingering tensions.

I finally nodded, holding my arms out and offering her a small smile of reassurance. “Alright, Luna,” I said softly. “Let's hug it out.”

Luna's eyes lit up, her face brightening with a mixture of joy and relief. Without a moment’s hesitation, she stepped closer to me, her hooves padding gently. One after the other, her forehooves rested themselves on my shoulders as she leaned her weight into me. As I supported her, she relaxed, her wings folding gently to create a warm cocoon around me.

It felt like while I was supporting her, she was supporting me as well. I felt protected. The warmth of her body pressed against mine, and for the first time in what felt like days, I allowed myself to relax, just a little. So I hugged her back, snaking my arms through the feathers and around her back and neck.

At first, the hug felt tentative—careful, as if we didn’t want to break the truce we have now. But as the moments passed, I felt her hold begin to tighten as if she were drawing strength from the contact.

Then, I felt it.

A tremble, barely noticeable at first, ran through her body.

Her words came out in halting breaths, as if she were struggling to hold herself together. “I… I’m sorry, Edgar. I don’t want to cry—I wanted to keep myself together, I wanted to…” Her wings, which had been steady, began to quiver slightly. And her breath, which had been soft, turned into a muffled sob. I felt the tears, wet against my neck, as she pressed her face against me. The hug was no longer a simple gesture of comfort—it was a desperate grasp for solace.

“I had thought that finishing this together, washing away all this… shame, would somehow make things better between us," she whispered, her voice breaking. "But I don’t feel right. I still feel… lost. I had always imagined... I had always dreamed of a day when I could share this moment with somepony I loved. To be close to them as I am with you now...But not like this. Not like this.”

“Luna,” I murmured, my hand stroking her mane, trying to soothe her. “It’s okay.” I felt her body shake, and I was having a hard time keeping myself together too now.

“I'm...afraid. I fear I have broken my sister's trust in me so greatly that I may not be able to mend it.” Her voice dropped, almost inaudible, and her eyes met mine. “I fear that even if I am even truly forgiven, I'll never be truly be trusted again, by our family or you.” Her body trembled against mine and she pulled me even closer, holding me as if she feared I might disappear. “Twilight may say that I am not a bad pony, but I am not always a kind pony either. I… I know I am capable of cruelty, I warned you as much.” she choked out, her voice raw. “You have seen it now, felt it—” her voice faltered as she held her words at bay. “You may no longer feel angry anymore, but are…" Luna choked back a sob , as if she was truly afraid of what she was going to say. "...Are you afraid of me now?”

...Words just felt cheap, so I chose to act.

I lunged forward before I could question myself and pressed my lips against Luna's. Our lips met awkwardly, my teeth accidentally clicking against hers, and the small shock caused me to realize what I'd just done. I started to lean away, but her wing raised from behind me, cupping the back of my head and holding me steady as she deepened the kiss, soft and tender. She tilted her head as I closed my eyes to match her own.

When her muzzle pulled away from mine, and her wing fell back behind her. For a moment, her eyes widen, her expression a mix of surprise and awe. “Edgar...you—”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that right after saying friends was a better starting point...” I admitted. “I just… No." I whispered, meaning it with every shaky breath.

“You... you’re not afraid,” she whispered, her voice trembling. “Even after everything...”

“No, even if you think I should be.” I told her. I shook my head, my heart still pounding in my chest while I could feel my face heating up. I didn't mind though.

Luna pressed her forehead against mine, her eyes meeting mine. “Thank you...Thank you.” she whispered. Then, her eyes closed, and the tension in her body seemed to fade.

We stayed like that for a long moment, foreheads touching, sharing the same breath.

"Ummm..." A voice interjected, breaking the spell that had momentarily fallen over us. It's tone was hesitant, but there was an undercurrent of urgency.

Twilight, who had been quietly watching, suddenly cleared her throat. "You didn't mention you'd be kissing. We still don't understand your touch as much as we should… and I think we've pushed our luck enough for one day." Twilight’s face flushed as she spoke, her eyes darting from us to the floor. "Shouldn't you both dry off?"

Her words yanked me back to reality, the air between Luna and me suddenly filled with an awkward tension. Twilight wasn’t wrong, and as I glanced down, I could feel my face heating up uncomfortably.

"Right. Drying off,” I muttered, looking away and feeling a sudden rush of embarrassment.

Luna’s wings had already started to pull back, and she dipped her head slightly, her gaze flicking over to Twilight with a mix of gratitude and restraint. “Yes, of course. I suppose it is time we… finish up.” Her voice was soft, but I could hear the reluctance in it, and something about that made my chest tighten.

Twilight’s smile was small but supportive as she passed over a couple of folded towels and laid them in front of us, her eyes noticeably more focused on the floor than on either of us. “Sorry,” she said, trying to fill the silence with an upbeat tone. “I’ll, um, give you two a moment to, you know, get sorted. Just… let me know when I can turn around, Edgar.” She took a cautious step back, and turned away to give us a little more space and privacy.

When we got out, it took Luna hardly anytime to dry herself off. Even from here, I felt she had an almost localized vortex of hot air swirling around her. During which, she kept drying the towel with her magic as she was drying herself, so every stroke left her bone dry as her mane started to retain the ethereal flow it used to have.

I beat her by a hair though, being mostly hairless. Now, all that was left was to find my pants. Wasn't interested in looking like a beach tourist the entire day.

I was encouraged to take the first step out with Twilight and Luna insisting that Stallions should go first. I asked them to go, but they were adamant that they were in the right since they both offered first.

So, I let the door creak open, only to see something... stranger than I was used to.

No royal guards or royal-tee, or any Royal-stab-happy princesses. Instead just above the doorway, was a wizard hat—a familiar, worn-out, star-studded wizard hat. It floated there like some kind of magical sentry, suspended mid-air and spinning silently like a flying saucer.

For a second, none of us moved.

"...I forgot about the Balconies..." Twilight muttered to herself, her voice carrying a mix of realization and exasperation. She shook her head as she kept her eyes on it."Trixieeeee?"

"Trixie?" Princess Luna echoed, raising an eyebrow at the spinning hat above us, her voice tinged with confusion.

"Twilight?" I started to ask, my gaze bouncing between them, but then something prickled in my gut—a deep, inexplicable disturbance in the force, like my soul was sending out a silent scream of warning.

○□ X ↻ □ ○ △ ↬ △ B B △ A

Is... Is that a fucking quick-time event?

Before I could fully process it, the hat gave a sudden, almost comical jerk—then bam! Like a cannon, out shot Trixie like a Great and Powerful cannonball in the shape of a mare, forelegs extended.

"ED-GAAAAAAAAR!" she shouted, her voice booming as she collided with me, clamping her forehooves tightly around my neck. Her back hooves locking onto my waist in a hug that was somewhere between an affectionate embrace and a wrestling hold.

"TRI-XIEEEE?!?" I gasped out, barely able to blink before her impact sent me staggering backward, my feet scrambling for traction that wasn’t there. The world tilted as we tumbled back, my arms flailing, reaching for anything to stop the fall.

"SIR EDGAR!" I heard Princess Luna shout, but it was too late.

The water came up to meet me as I landed in the jacuzzi tub with a splash, Trixie clinging to me all the while, and my head plunged beneath the surface. Bubbles erupted around us as I struggled to find my footing, but Trixie only tightened her grip, oblivious to the fact that we were now both submerged.

Through the muffled, underwater haze, I could still hear her yelling, her voice distorted into a bizarre, bubbly warble."Bllbllblee-ed-gaaaalblblbl...!” she cried, her relief somehow undampened by the fact that I could barely make out what she was saying.

I pushed myself back up, breaking the surface with a sharp gasp for air. As I blinked away water from my eyes, I caught sight of Trixie, who also surfaced with a big, deep inhale. Her eyes were squeezed shut, her expression one of pure, uninhibited joy as she tightened her embrace, her hooves wrapped snugly around me once more.

"EDGAAAR!" she shouted again, as if I hadn’t heard her the first few times.

"TRIXIEEEEEE!!!" Twilight added, her tone exasperated, one hoof pressed to her forehead.

"Trixie!" Luna’s voice cut through the commotion, firm and unmistakably disapproving. She stood by the edge of the tub, her eyes narrowed in annoyance, and I caught a hint of barely contained anger simmering beneath her otherwise calm expression.

Trixie’s head whipped around, fixing both of them with a scowl as she let out an indignant huff. “Lunaaaa...” Trixie’s scowl only deepened as she glanced back at Luna, tightening her hold on me with a stubborn little squeeze, almost as if she was trying to shield me from the princess. “LunaAAA…!” she growled.

"Trixie!" I gave her a light push, feeling my patience wear thin. “I just got dried off, okay? Please, it's been emotional enough in here. We don't need you fighting anypony!” I tried to gently pry her off, but her grip only tightened, and even though her eyes were squeezed shut, I heard a break in her voice.

"NO!" Her lower lip quivered as she looked up at me, and before I could say another word, her expression crumpled. “I… I thought you were dead,” she whispered, her voice cracking. “The last thing I remember was Princess Celestia. In your room...with a halberd, and Luna just stood there!” She hugged me even tighter, squeezing her eyes shut as she pressed herself further into me. "You weren't there when I woke up..."

My own frustration faded, a pang of sympathy slipping through. "Trixie...please let go. I'm fine now, and touching me does things to ponies."

"No!" She shook her head against my chest and tightened her hold, like she was holding on for dear life.

Just as I was about to respond, the door burst open, and Cadance and Shining Armor came rushing in, their expressions tense and alert. Shining’s eyes swept the room, but he relaxed slightly upon seeing me intact and soaked again. When his gaze fell on Trixie, still clinging to me in the tub, Twilight sighed.

“It was the balconies,” she said flatly behind the couple.

“…The balconies???" Shining Armor asked in surprise. "HOW? She's a unicorn? How'd she sneak past the guard and get in through the balcony?!?"

"Her hat should have been confiscated by your guard." Twilight began explaining. "She must've turned it into an object of holding way before she even came to Ponyville, and controlled it like a frisbee while she was inside it..." Twilight revealed as a matter of fact. "It's surprising, but out of the realm of possibility. Being a Falling Star and a Magician is a dangerous combo when they already tend to think outside the box."

Cadance hummed.

"You have got to admit, she's creative." Cadance’s gaze flicked briefly to Luna, a quick, unreadable look passing between them, before she turned back to Trixie. Her expression softened as she approached the edge of the tub looking at Trixie. “Sweetie? Are you feeling better now that you know Edgar's okay?” she asked gently, her voice calm and soothing as though speaking to a distraught foal.

She nodded. "Mmmyeah..."

“Do you wanna get out of the tub now?” Cadance coaxed.

Trixie shook her head emphatically, wrapping her forelegs around me again. “I can't keep leaving him alone. He gets hurt when I do...” she mumbled, barely meeting Cadance’s concerned gaze. "What if I'm still dreaming? What if Princess Luna is keeping him all to herself ?" She turned back to me. "What if I wake up and you're not there?!"

"Trixie, you know you're not dreaming." Twilight tried reassuring. “I know you really like him, but—”

But a quick look from both Cadance and Shining Armor silenced her. They cleared their throats meaningfully, both subtly nodding toward Trixie and me.

“I think…” Shining began, his voice deliberately gentle, “This might be a good time for them to meet up, now that we're all here. They probably have some things to say to each other, right?” He looked down at us.

"Mmyeah..." Trixie sniffled and gave a shaky nod, her grip on me loosening just a bit. Her gaze flicked up to meet mine, and I could see the guilt and uncertainty flickering in her eyes. “Edgar… I—I’m sorry. I haven’t been a good friend to you,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “I know I’ve been a little…difficult. But I’ve been really trying—”

“Trixie,” Luna interjected, her tone firm yet surprisingly gentle, “Perhaps it would be wise to… unhoof Edgar.” Her gaze flickered briefly to me. “You may not like it, but he is my Royal Consort, and his touch will only make things harder for you.”

A light blue glow covered Luna's mouth.

"First of all, even when you managed to put that spell on Auntie Celestia, the Consort title isn't in writing yet. Second of all, shush!" came a curt reply from Cadance. Luna rolled her eyes, before eventually accepting Cadance's decision, though she seemed annoyed by it regardless.

Trixie’s jaw clenched, her face scrunching with irritation as she shot a begrudging look back at Luna, holding onto me as though she couldn’t quite bring herself to let go. “I know I shouldn't be...but I also know it's at least a little real.” she muttered. “But that’s… that’s why I have to do this now. I need to tell him the truth, even if… even if it’s the last time he can see me.” I felt her grip relax slightly as she took a deep breath, gathering her courage. Finally, she looked back up at me, her eyes a mixture of guilt, sadness, and something else I couldn’t quite place, and she let go and waded a few steps back. She took in another breath and shook her head slightly. “Edgar, before anything else... I have something to say.”

The intensity in her eyes threw me off, her usual bravado giving way to something raw and painfully sincere. I watched her gather herself, every word seeming to take effort.

...

But it took a while longer than I thought it would...

“Trixie, if this is about… y’know, your feelings,” I ventured, giving her an awkward smile. “I get it. I don't want to force you to try and get things out so soon after what happened earlier today. I am sorry that I—”

“Shut up!” she snapped, squeezing her eyes shut as though trying to block me out. “Edgar, just let me talk!”

“Okay, okay…” I muttered, holding up my hands in surrender. “I was just trying to—”

“Please,” she choked out, her voice faltering. “You don’t know what I’m trying to say.”

I blinked, surprised by the seriousness in her voice, and for once, I actually held my tongue. Her gaze drifted to the wall, like she was gathering her strength from anywhere but me, and I could see how much effort it took her to start.

“You've...you've been nice to me. Luna said that you even stood up for me, but you don’t know me as well as you think you do,” she murmured, barely above a whisper. She even seemed to be thinking hard about what words she was choosing. “Even if you think you’ve seen the worst of me or even, if you think you know my past… you don’t know it all. You don’t know what I’ve done.” She took a shaky breath, her voice dropping. “I… I teleported and left you down there with the changelings. Does that sound like something a friend would do?”

"Yeah? You ran to get help cause you couldn't teleport me inside." I said.

"There you go again, trying to excuse me. But that's not all." Trixie said. "That night, the night we met…” Her voice cracked, but she pushed forward, her words now spilling out in a torrent. “I... I tried to… to ra—ra…”

“I know you tried to stab me with a rubber prop knife. I thought we were past that.” I tried, half-joking, only to see her glare turn scorching.

“Edgar! This is hard enough without you interrupting!” She let out a frustrated huff, looking away as if expecting the worst reaction from me. “Trixie… I frotted myself on top of you. I came on top of you, and I almost went even further than that.”

"...What?" I asked.

She remembers?!?

Her gaze dropped, her eyes filled with shame, and her voice softened, barely more than a whisper. “It was the night we met and you were drunk. You… you even told me we shouldn’t, but I still forced myself onto you. Trixie rubbed herself all over your pants…” She cringed, and I could feel the pain in every word. “That morning, I struck you across the muzzle and lied. I made you think you’d wet yourself, but it was I, Trixie…who ‘wet yourself’—and on top of you, too.” She let out a defeated sigh, clearly expecting judgment. "But I want you to know that... I hate that I did that. I want to make things right between us, and if that means not being your special somepony until I can prove I can, then I will. I just... I couldn't keep that bottled up. I don't want to lie to you anymore. I think I really like you..."

Her words caught me off guard. "Trixie, that's not what happened! Sure, I said no at first, but we were both drunk and you were surprisingly convincing.”

"What?!?" "What?!?" "WHAT?!?"

Every pony in the room save except for Shining Armor and Princess Cadance shouted, queuing the melody magic to make it's first appearance in an almost light-hearted background music.

After a few moments, Trixie unfroze.

“What do you mean by that?” She asked.

I could feel the blood draining from my face. “Y-yeah,” I said slowly. “I remember mostly everything that happened… but I thought you didn’t. You had like a whole bottle of wine.”

"SO DID YOU!" Trixie screeched in shock.

"Yea, but I'm bigger than you." I offered her. "How did you remember? I thought you'd be black-out drunk."

Her eyes widened, a faint spark of anger rising through her shame. “You knew?” She shook her head, her voice trembling. “You knew, and you let me walk around with you thinking… thinking I’d gotten away with it? With lying to you?” She struggled to keep her voice steady. “I hit you, Edgar. I slapped you and made you think you were the one who wet the bed.”

I winced, the memory crashing over me. “I didn't know you lied to me,” I admitted, rubbing the back of my neck. “I thought it was completely reasonable for you to throw that punch, given what you knew. You thought I pissed myself under and on you. Completely understandable. If I told you what happened, it’d only make things awkward, so I just… I went along with it. I figured it'd be too awkward in the morning if you knew what happened, but now I know about "my touch". That changes things.”

I really gotta think of a less Molest-y name for that.

Trixie’s mouth worked soundlessly as she stared at me, slack-jawed, her entire expression frozen in dumbfounded shock. It was as if I could practically hear her mind stalling out. I half-expected her to start sparking and smoking like some glitchy machine.

Luna, standing at the edge of the tub, frowned and cleared her throat. “Edgar, I understand that you are new to Equestrian customs, but self-control is still necessary for a mare, even if she’s impaired. Stallions like you respond differently if a mare presses herself upon thee. You would... succumb more easily than a mare might, so it falls on her to exercise restraint. Especially if she does not know whether you are in a herd with another.”

“Didn’t the changeling venom impair me, too, Luna?” I defended Trixie with a raised eyebrow. “Also, didn't we both drink some delicious ‘sambuca cocktail’ you made for us last night.”

Luna tried to ignore the look that Cadance was giving her, and instead pointed at the hoof-shaped mark on her cheek. "Yes... and thou shalt see that everypony in the Royal Family is righteously furious at us for it."

"Furious is an understatement." Cadance shot a look as she leaned in at Luna once more, forcing Luna to lean away from her with a flushed face.

Fuck. Time to deflect away from Luna now.

"It's okay. We made up, Cadance." I said.

Cadance raised a skeptical eyebrow. “...I'm somewhat of a firm supporter of Love, and I'm all for the Magic of Friendship, but seriously?” She tilted her head like she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “You’re just... fine with it already? After everything Aunt Luna did?”

“I get why she did it... and I’m the guy with the weird touch-thing going on. It's gotta be more my fault than anypony else's." I added defensively. “I mean, it’s not fine... but it’s fine, you know?”

“No, I don’t think I know.” Cadance shook her head, her expression a mix of concern and curiosity. “Even if Luna or Trixie were ‘influenced,’ so were you…”

“Well, things are… different where I’m from.” I cut in, trying to make this simple. “Back home, it’s actually the guy’s job to stop things before they go too far. He’s supposed to keep his head straight, even if he’s, well… let’s just say not thinking straight.” I scratched the back of my neck. “Guys are usually stronger, so there’s, uh, kind of an unspoken rule. If he messes up, even if it’s ‘consensual,’ he gets the blame. Even if it was an accident or spur-of-the-moment, it’s still his responsibility.”

The words surprised even me—I explained that way faster than I thought I could.

Guess reading all those stories helped me out here.

“I’m kinda thinking of this as me getting off easy. I'm not mad at Luna anymore, and I'm definitely not mad at Trixie.” I tapped the hoof-shaped bruise from Trixie lightly. "So... I guess I’m saying our worlds have reversed views and stuff."

Princess Cadance looked like she wanted to say more, but her husband jumped in. "He looks like he's in a better mood anyway. Let's take the win for now."

Cadance begrudgingly dropped it, but Shining Armor looked almost excited as he turned back to me.

"Ya know, to be honest, if I put myself in your skin, I don't know if I'd be taking all this as well as you are." Shining started. "Cadance and I figured that out pretty quickly after talking with with you that there were some serious cultural differences between us, especially with mares. You really threw us for a loop earlier, especially since you kept beating yourself up over all this!" Shining Armor leaned toward Twilight, wagging his eyebrows. "That'd be like if Twilee ever got transported to your world. She'd have a colt-friend day one, let alone her own harem of stallions fighting over her."

Twilight went beet-red. "...Bonk, Shiny."

"Start dating already!" Shining commanded no differently then if he told her to do chores. "Any stallion would be lucky if they gave you a chance, but you gotta give'm a chance first. Whatever happened with that "Flash" guy, anyway?"

"Babe!" Cadance quickly jumped to her defense. "Leave my sister-in-law alone about that already. I already banned you from harassing her about it."

"She's my sister first, and I swore a sibling oath to harass her every time we visit and she's not in a herd." He looked back to Twilight and grinned. "Besides, the bloodline's gotta go on somehow. The sooner she gets to dating, the sooner I get a nephew to do cool uncle things with, like throwing them as high as I can before catching him."

"She'll get a herd when she's good and ready, so maybe you should stop focusing so much on your sister's love life," Cadance smirked and got a devilish grin. "and start focusing more on putting a foal in me."

Shining paused for a moment with a blush appearing over his face first...then a devious smile.

"...I'm bucking trying, but you won't stop swallowing!" Shining Armor shot back at Cadance as if he had a stroke of genius, matching her fluster with his own.

A loud smack could be herd as Twilight's hooves went to cover her ears.

"~STOOOOoooOOP IT~! We're RIGHT here!!!" Twilight shook here head to drown out the noise with the most furious blush her face can manage. "I wish Horny Jail was a real place. I'd bonk you both and send you there for your estrus week with nothing but puzzles and books for reading."

"You're gonna seclude me and Cady in a room with the most boring stuff imaginable and no royal obligations? You must really want a niece and-or nephew as badly as I want one!" Shining teased.

"Babe, seriously. Enough or I'll cuff you to the bed and paddle you. TO-NIGHT!" Cadance growled, her cheeks reddening in the most sultry shade of red. "And not in the fun way."

"Tonight??? You're bluffing..." Shining said lovingly, leaning against her barrel as she nuzzled back under his chin. His eyes went to her eyes and his smile grew when he saw that look. "You're not gonna let me walk into the conference room with a limp in my gait. You luuuuuv me too much."

Cadance hummed out in contentment and had an almost serene look with her eyes closed, as if enjoying some magic feeling that only she and her husband experience in each other's company. "...The paddling has just turned into pegging."

"~La la la la laaaaaa~!" Twilight's voice went high pitched as her eyes bulged out. "La la la la la laaaaaaaa~!"

Honestly, I'm glad she had the brightest blush in the room, and that she was as distracting as she was. It completely drew the focus away from my own blush.

Cadance and Shining were fucking unstoppable.

Twilight soon cleared her throat many times before she took on a more Twilight-esque analytical tone. However, the blush still remained. "I only had him for a few hours of questions a few days ago, which is not a lot of time. We can't call it "reversed gender roles" because we don't even know for certain what is considered "normal" and "reversed" for Edgar. If roles were truly reversed from ours, it sounds like mares on his world would be bigger pound for pound with notable exceptions, but Edgar just said stallions are often stronger. Isn't that right, Edgar?"

"Uhhh...yea." I confirmed as I started to feel my own blush start to slowly fade.

"So based on what I understand so far, both our stallions have higher testosterone and tend to be bigger on average than mares. Historically for ponies, this was mainly due to..." While Twilight trailed off overanalyzing and I did my best to drone out the reminders of the best couple's banter. I was still recovering from the conversation I’d just been subjected to when Princess Luna cleared her throat softly, her voice pulling me back. Her expression was contemplative, maybe even a little apologetic.

“Sir Edgar?” she began, her gaze briefly flicking to Cadance and Shining Armor. Though they weren't saying anything, the appeared to still be having their own silent, shameless exchange by flirting with their eyes. “We apologize if our niece’s boldness with her husband caught you unprepared. T’is something of a custom for them both to… ah, keep each other’s affections ‘well-polished,’ shall we say?” She gave a faint smile, like she was trying to keep a straight face.

I let out a small laugh, rubbing the back of my neck. “Oh, it’s fine, really,” I assured her, though the blush still crept up again despite myself. “I mean, I’m not used to seeing couples… "polishing" each other like that, but they look wholesome. It’s like they’re still in the honeymoon phase.” I paused, then added with a bit of honesty, “Honestly, Shining Armor’s lucky—he found someone that really cares about him, and she’s… well, she’s clearly been head-over-heels for him too. I’d say they’re both pretty lucky.”

At this, Luna’s brow arched in surprise, and her gaze grew thoughtful again. “Indeed? It is rare for a stallion to be thought of as the ‘fortunate’ one in such a pairing.” She paused as if choosing her words carefully. “While it's important for those with a special somepony to keep their other half happy, often it is a mare who initiates, as she must first catch her stallion's attention. To keep each other engaged in the relationship. T’is considered her duty to win him over and hold his interest, while it is a stallion's to be worth that interest.” Her eyes grew warm with admiration as she looked toward her niece. "But they're different. They told us it was as if they fell in love at first sight. They strove to better themselves for the other's sake."

I raised a brow. “So in Equestria, mares are supposed to do the… the courting?”

Luna nodded. “Both must be desirable, but we believe that stallions have it easier in that regard. A mare's duty is to woo. That is what it means to be a proper partner here, especially when other mares may also wish to win a stallion’s favor,” she explained with a quiet, thoughtful tone. “Thus, it’s often the mare who considers herself fortunate to capture a worthy stallion’s attentions, whether she is their first, or if she joins a herd. Though Cadance, I think, has found a most willing partner who loves her unconditionally—and without thought of any other mare.” She nodded as if this was no small feat. “Even for a Princess, loyalty like Shining Armor's is… enviable.”

It took me a moment to digest this. It sounds par to the course of a typical herd set-up in a story, but it is a bit different hearing them talk about it like this in person. It's a bit harder to wrap my head around even though I heard about a few dozen ideas about it already.

“Wow. That’s… well, different. Not bad,” I added quickly, noticing her curious gaze. “Just different. Where I’m from, a guy sticks to one partner, and is usually the one expected to make the first move, to impress too.”

"You have impressed, if you were wondering." Luna gave a soft hum, a light smile touching her lips as if something had been confirmed for her. She looked at me with a warmth that held a hint of expectation. “But reserving yourself to one mare? I wonder, how might you feel, now that more than one mare may show interest in you? If reversed...It would be quite dreamy fantasy for most mares.”

I blinked, not quite expecting the question, then let out a chuckle, scratching my head. “I don’t know, to be honest. If I wasn't rich when they were doing it, I'd probably think I was about to get scammed,” I joked, shaking my head. “Back home, I’m kind of… average, I guess?" Probably even less than that, considering I'm a theatre kid. “It’d be kind of a shock.”

Luna smiled a little more, her gaze gentle, her words flowing smoothly. “Then mayhaps it is time for thee to see thyself through a different lens, Edgar.” Her voice softened, her tone inviting. “My tastes are not freakish. Many mares may find themselves drawn to thee as I had—To thine courage and kindness.” She looked down for a moment as if gathering her words. “It would be my hope that you may come to realize thy own worth, and perhaps be open to any admiration shown to thee. After all…” Her voice grew softer still, almost musing, “In Equestria, a stallion with such qualities might well find himself… in high demand.”

Her words made my heart pound, and I had to fight to keep my voice steady. “What, you're saying you wouldn't try keeping me for yourself?” I asked, half-joking, though her gentle smile suggested she was only half-teasing.

“A possibility worth exploring, should you wish it,” she replied, that mysterious smile only deepening. "Though, we may be "friends" for a time, and you should still be cherished by mares who see you for who you are."

The blush started creeping back.

"I appreciate you buttering me up like that,” I replied with a chuckle. “But, uh… that might not be the best idea with my ‘touch’—I still need a better name for it.” I scratched the back of my neck, casting her a sheepish smile. “I mean, I’d have never imagined even anyone seeing me like that, let alone you."

"...What of Mrs. Lulamoon?" Luna asked, her tone turning serious. “We saw how strongly she feels for thee. Surely there is some truth to her feelings, and some of the friendship you share? Do you feel for her?”

My mind suddenly flashed to the soaked unicorn that's been sitting in the bath with me this entire time...the one that I've been ignoring this entire time.

Oh, shit. I forgot about her.

I turned back to the previously blue-screened mare to see...steam literally coming from her ears and her nose now like her brain been frying this entire time.

"Trixie?" I tentatively called out. "Trixie, I wasn't trying to ignore you. I'm sorry that I was, but I think we can put the whole misunderstanding behind us."

...

"Are you okay Trixie...? Do you smell burnt toast?" I tried again.

I waited a few moments, before she shook herself out of whatever trance she was in.

"...So Edgar... You're used to gender roles being reversed?" She asked...letting the question linger in the air before she narrowed her eyes?

“Twilight just said that that was an assumption...Trixie?” I muttered, realizing too late what was happening. My gut twisted with an inexplicable sense of dread.

"Edgar...?"

...Oh, no.

!!! ○ □ X X□ ↻ ○△ ↻ △ ↻ △ ↻ B B △ A !!!

The music suddenly shifted, and as it changed, what appeared to be the world's angriest blue ball with hooves dove straight into my chest as Trixie tackled me, plunging us both underwater again. Her hooves found my shoulders as she grabbed me, shaking me violently, her rage pouring out in the form of underwater bubbles

Desperately, I tried to resurface, only to catch a mouthful of lavender bath water. I could barely breathe as she shook me back and forth, her angry, inaudible, water-muffled warbling and echoing in my ears:"Yububllulblb-DiiicKCHHbbhhb!

When we finally broke the surface, I coughed, struggling to catch my breath as Trixie clung to me, eyes blazing.

“Am I okay?!” she shrieked, her hooves locking onto me like a vice. “You lying, blockheaded, self-righteous JERK!” She shook me with every syllable, punctuating each word with another furious shove. "You thought I wouldn’t remember?! You thought you’d cover for me, make it easier on me? You liar!”

Luna jumped to the bath as well in an instant, biting down on Trixie’s mane in an attempt to pull her away. “Unhooph Sir Edgar, you cur!” she commanded, tugging at her hair as she tried pulling Trixie off of me...

But Trixie’s fury was relentless. She held tight, shaking me back and forth like a rag doll. I felt like a bobble-head in her grasp.

"Our whole relationship was built on throne of LIES!” The magician screamed, her words devolving into hysterical rage. “I've been terrified of this conversation! I spent days dreading it. I thought I ruined everything, but you’re just as much of a lying, horny idiot as THE GREAT AND POWERFUL MEEEEEEE!”

Her voice reverberated off the walls, forcing Cadance and Shining's Horn to start glowing...only for them to stop as Cadance started to rush toward the bath.

“Shiny! Gonna need your muscles!” she shouted, diving into the bath to pry the Great and Powerful Trixie off me, with Shining following suit with a splash. Luna abandoned her mane grip and latched onto Trixie’s right leg, attempting to pull her back.

Shining’s face twisted in bewilderment as he gripped his wife’s tail to anchor himself, while Twilight also dove in to help, grabbing Luna. “How is she so strong?!”

“I SURVIVED ON A ROCK FARM FOR MONTHS!” Trixie howled, tightening her hold as she continued to unleash a barrage of insults. “And don’t you dare think you’re getting off easy, Ed-gaaaar! You lied the night we met! You lied the morning after. You lied about what happened with Telsona! You’re a bigger liar than I am! You're the BIGGEST LIAR in Equestria, and you made me LOVE YOU!” Her voice cracked, a tremor in her words. "You're the Biggity-est, Big Big, Biiig, HUMONGOUS, Assholiest..."

You know... despite this morning and what is happening this very moment, I had a strange sense that everything was gonna turn out alright. They might be worried about me, but Trixie was being gentler than it looked with the water sloshing about and over the tub. It was almost kinda fun, and I was actually glad that Trixie wasn't as sad as she was a moment ago. Whether or not this was better than the alternative though...

"I—swear—to—god—it—won't—HappenAgain!" I tried saying through heaves and shoves.

"SWEAR TO ME!" She shouted, taking one hoof off of me and grabbing her wet hat before beating the wet wool against my head repeatedly.

Eh, I'm sure it'll work out...

***Minutes later***

I sat on the edge of the nearby couch, the only undestroyed piece of furniture in my room, with a towel wrapped around my waist and a pillow shoved in my hands—one of Twilight’s enthusiastic attempts to “help me relax.”

I didn't need it, but it's the thought that counts.

Celestia was nowhere to be seen. Apparently, she was a few floors down addressing the Royal Guard alongside Princess Blueblood. I’d been assured by Cadance and Shining that Celestia was explaining what happened and why it was…wrong, but the unease still lingered.

Luna, looking unusually disheveled but composed, sat beside me, her wings loosely wrapped around herself as she fixed a challenging look on Trixie from across the room, as if daring her to try anything else. Trixie had been peeled off me earlier, but she still wore the fresh hoof-shaped mark on her swollen right cheek—courtesy of Princess Luna. She glanced over at her hat and cape, which were drying across the room, while her expression softened each time she glanced back at me.

Cadance and Shining were nearby, speaking in low voices, and Twilight hovered in the doorway, keeping a wary eye on Trixie, as if expecting Round Two at any moment.

The peace felt tentative, fragile—held together by unspoken apologies and the sighs that slipped out as we all settled down. Finally, I dared to break the silence.

“So…” I began, trying for a diplomatic tone, “are we good?”

I saw Trixie’s expression darken slightly, her ears flicking back in irritation as she gingerly touched the bruise on her cheek, wincing. She shot a glance at Luna and muttered, “This wasn’t the Great and Powerful Trixie’s finest moment… but yes, we’re "good". Mostly.” She winced again, massaging the bump. “Though… Princess Luna’s punch still throbs.”

“Good,” Luna huffed, a slight smirk playing at her lips as she leaned further into the sofa, her wings stretching out in a lazy, half-satisfied display. “Then perhaps this will remind you not to lay hooves upon my consort again.”

Trixie bristled, her eyes narrowing as her tail flicked in agitation. “Edgar wouldn’t be your consort if you didn’t swoop in and steal him right out from under another mare’s nose,” she countered, meeting Luna’s gaze with a challenging glint. “You knew! You knew I might've loved him, and-"

"Edgar isn't your stallion." Luna’s expression hardened, the playful hint vanishing as she met Trixie’s gaze with an equally challenging look.

"Then why did you get decide he had to be yours?" Trixie retorted, her voice sharp. "I would have helped him, and I would have listened to him."

“To prevent impulsive mares like you from trying to harm him. I overlooked your confession last night as you seemed genuinely remorseful. Perhaps you were, but you've all but confirmed that you are completely controlled by your feelings than your brain. Thou art still too arrogant and foalish. After your display, we no longer believe thou art fit to be a mistress let alone his herd mate,” she retorted, the words slipping out in a low growl.

“And after what you did,” Trixie shot back, her voice low and seething, “...and didn't do, maybe you’re not fit to be anypony's herd mate. He'd still be safer with me than he'd ever be with you!”

"After today, maybe both of you need shut up, since none of you have a moral high ground." Cadance interjected, a hint of annoyance flashing across her face as she stepped in between the two mares glaring daggers and thunderbolts at each other. She pinned both Trixie and Luna with a stern gaze, her voice taking on a firm, authoritative edge. “Even if Aunt Luna technically saved Edgar in a roundabout way, she put him in an bad spot, and none of us like that. If you don't believe me, you can see my opinion right there." Cadance pointed to the hoofmark that was still on Luna's face. "However, we’re supposed to be trying to move past this, not adding fuel to the fire. What you did was wrong too, but you don't hear us scolding you.”

Twilight cleared her throat, her gaze flicking thoughtfully between Trixie and Luna. Her eyes lingered on the bruise on Trixie’s cheek as she sighed, clearly getting tired of the back-and-forth. “Speaking of that opinion of yours, it’s been long enough, I think,” she said, shifting her gaze between Cadance and Luna.

Both Luna and Cadance caught Twilight’s hint and, with a reluctant sigh, let their horn glow softly. Luna's magical glow appeared to be casting a cool, gentle light across the bruise on Trixie’s cheek. The mark began to fade, healing under Luna’s careful magic. Meanwhile, Cadance’s own horn shimmered with a warm glow as she leaned over to tend to the hoof mark she’d left on Luna. The two princesses exchanged a look of shared understanding, though Luna’s gaze was shadowed with something else—perhaps guilt.

When they finished, there was no evidence of any strikes. They both looked almost immaculate, save for Trixie's wet and frazzled hair—wait, Luna's apparently fixing that too.

...Now they appear to be finished.

Luna drew back, casting a reserved glance at Trixie. At first, she didn't say anything as if she was still thinking about how best to approach this, but then she spoke, her voice was soft but steady. “Miss Lulamoon, I... apologize that I was too rough on thee. It is hard for myself to control mine own strength, and...I'm also sorry for the actions I took that led to… this arrangement that Edgar and I now share, and for how you saw it,” she said, gesturing slightly toward me. “While I believed my actions justified at the time, I now see they were inexcusable. I am sorry for the pain and confusion I’ve caused both of you, and I only ask that you understand that this wasn't done to hurt thee.”

Luna’s gaze softened, and her tone grew quieter, her sincerity clear as she added, “I… cannot deny that you care for him. Whether or not I think you need to temper your emotions...you have shown your loyalty toward him even considering his touch, and especially when you stood up to our sister on his behalf.” Luna inclined her head, showing an unexpected gesture of respect. “That was… very brave of you. I think there is something real behind your feelings as well if you can only learn to control them.”

Trixie blinked, surprise flickering across her face as she processed Luna’s words. Her brow furrowed, looking at her back leg for some reason. Maybe she was just avoiding eye contact while if weighing her next response carefully?

After a moment, she huffed, crossing her forelegs and looking away. “You’re still a Bitch.”

Luna’s eyes narrowed and she practically fumed in anger as her wings bristled slightly. “OOOOOoooo, thou art an impossibly—”

Cadance and Shining quickly stepped between them. Cadance shot a warning look at Trixie, while Shining stepped forward, clearing his throat.

“Alright, enough,” Cadance said firmly, giving both mares a look that left no room for argument. “Edgar had already forgiven you both, so quit."

Trixie gave Luna a final indignant look before grumbling and backing down.

Then, turning to me, Cadance added, “That being said...I think you might want to rethink how quickly you forgive mares for this kind of thing.”

I gave her a shrug, a small smile pulling at the corners of my mouth. “Oh come on, it wasn’t so bad—I wasn’t scared of Trixie anything,” I admitted. “Honestly, I thought the situation was funny then.” I chuckled a little, rubbing the back of my neck.

Cadance frowned, fixing me with a look that was equal parts concerned and exasperated. “Right. And this from the Stallion who just went through with the Ablution despite everything that happened.” She sighed, shaking her head. “Edgar, if there was another element of harmony, yours would be forgiveness, but there is a fine line between that and rolling over. You’re going to have to learn to stand up for yourself a little more. She leaned forward, her eyes narrowing slightly. “I get that "roles might be reversed", but you can’t let mares just walk all over you.”

"I'd probably forgive them anyway. Besides, it's kinda hard to stand proud when I'm stuck with my wiener out for the world to see." I trailed off, giving a significant look down at the towel wrapped around my waist.

"Right...the clothes thing." Shining clicked his tongue in sympathy.

Twilight’s magic flared as she floated over a very small stack of clothes, presenting me with my plaid boxers, socks, and shoes...and nothing else.

I glanced around, frowning. “Where are my pants?”

“Oh, um,” Twilight’s ears flattened as she smiled sheepishly. “While you were… out, we kind of had to shear them off with scissors. They’re, um, not in the best shape.”

My smile dropped as the news hit me harder than I expected. “Seriously? They're gone?!?”

"No, You "seriously?"." Shining Armor countered.

Shining and Cadance seemed like a unit. Shining raised a brow looking amused, and while Cadance took the other have of the burden to look annoyed.

“Yeah, after everything else, that’s what you’re still upset about?” The Pink Princess plead.

“It was a nice pair of pants, and my only one. I don't like being naked,” I muttered, rubbing my neck. "What about my shirt?"

Twilight’s ears perked up, and she offered me a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry! My friend Rarity has her own Boutique. We had them delivered with a note this morning, and she's actually patching them up. In fact, she's probably finished and is making some replacements and extra outfits for you right now!” she said cheerfully. “You’re welcome to come along with me and pick them up yourself!” She brightened even further, getting more and more excited. “In fact, we could make a day of it! I could give you a tour around Ponyville once we’re done and we can get a bite to eat!" She squee-d like on the show right afterword, trying to be persuasive...I had an ominous feeling this wasn't going to go well.

“Then Trixie will be joining Princess Sparkle and Edgar,” she announced, tossing her towel aside and lifting her head in a mock-regal manner. Before Luna could open her mouth to object, Trixie shot her a daring look. “My wagon is, after all, still in Edgar’s car—and I’ll need his keys to retrieve it.”

I felt a pang of guilt as her words reminded me. “Oh, right… your wagon. Completely forgot about that,” I admitted, scratching the back of my head. “Twilight, you didn’t happen to grab my car keys while… searching my pockets?”

Twilight gave a small, sheepish shrug. “Uh, no… didn’t get the keys or anything else out of your pockets. Sorry.”

"Hmmm!" A glint of satisfaction sparkled in Trixie’s eyes as she looked back at me with a triumphant smile, as though she’d just won some unspoken contest. “Then Trixie must accompany them. If I don't go with him, then I might suspect your Consort of being a thief! What a scandal that would be.” she said, her tone leaving no room for argument. “Besides, it's only fair that he gets to explore Ponyville with mares he knows he can trust~” she took another glance at Princess Luna's direction and...

Oh my god. Where do I even begin to describe her look?

Princess Luna gave a delicate tilt of her head, her lips curving in a slight smile that might’ve passed as polite… if it weren’t for the glint in her eyes, like she’d just caught her opponent showing her hand. It was subtle, almost too subtle, but I could tell: Luna wasn’t just watching Trixie; she was studying her, like a hunter sizing up prey that thought it was clever enough to hide. She was smugging through her teeth to counter Trixie's own smug.

The look wasn’t just annoyance—it was patient, calculating. A faint tension sat in the set of her jaw, as though she were biting back a retort, but those eyes said plenty. I could practically feel her thoughts humming: Thou aren't slick, Bitch.

"That is...perfectly fine. I trust Edgar, and I know you won't lay a hoof on him during your time in Ponyville." Princess Luna said, wearing a total 'mean girls' smile if I ever saw one.

"I can see he's been through more than enough the past two days." Trixie said smugly with a challenging look. "I wouldn't dream of it yet."

"I know you wouldn't." Luna countered smuglyer. "But it is up to what Edgar prefers, no?"

Both mares turned to me, expecting some help in their tug-of-war.

...oh fuk. They want my help.

"No, this feels like a trap." I admitted. Or like foreplay for a cat fight.

Luckily, Twilight came to the rescue, raising an approving eyebrow at her suggestion. “Honestly, a walk might be perfect for us after everything this morning, and Luna's been up for quite a while.” she agreed, glancing my way. “How about it, Edgar? A trip into town, some fresh air, maybe some brunch after we get your pants?”

"...I do need pants." I turned back to Luna, and she gave a reluctant nod after a few moments of thought.

“Very well,” she said softly, letting out a sigh as she glanced over us. “If Twilight deems it suitable… then I trust her. But do try to keep them out of trouble.” Her gaze shifted to Trixie, her lips pressed together with a mix of irritation and acceptance. "I still have some orders to give the Night Mares before we retire to our chambers for the day."

Trixie just grinned at Luna, thoroughly pleased with herself for winning some imaginary battle.

Luna smiled back at Trixie...also thoroughly pleased with herself for winning some imaginary battle.

“I’ll take my leave, then. It’s late enough for me as it is, and I’ll need to be up tonight.” She glanced meaningfully at Cadance, Shining, and Twilight. “Don’t forget about the meeting later.” With a slight dip of her head, she turned toward the door.

She paused, casting me one last, lingering look—an expression of warmth and something… tentative, like she was leaving something unsaid. “Sir Edgar, I’ll be seeing thee anon.” Her voice softened as she added, “Enjoy thy day.” With that, she slipped gracefully from the room, her magic closing the door behind her.

The moment the door clicked shut, Trixie let out a triumphant huff, practically bouncing in place as she shot me a smug grin. “Well then, looks like you’ll have The Great and Powerful Trixie’s exclusive company today,” she said, emphasizing her title with a flourish.

Before I could respond, Twilight stepped forward, giving Trixie a skeptical glance. “Not exclusive, Trixie. I’m coming too,” she said, her tone light but unmistakably firm. “I still need to keep an eye on Edgar and… well, on you, too.” Her eyes softened a bit. “We don’t really know the full extent of Edgar’s ‘touch’ or if it has any limits on how much it can… amplify things. So we should be cautious, alright?”

Trixie let out a playful huff, clearly undeterred. “Oh, please, Princess. Trixie knows exactly how to handle herself.” But the faint glimmer of a grin tugging at her mouth told me she didn’t really mind the arrangement, either. "Though...I suppose we can allow you to join us."

"...Sure." Twilight rolled her eyes, then glanced back at Shining Armor and Cadance. “Besides, I need to pick up Spike from Rarity’s boutique, so it makes sense to come along.” She looked over at her brother with a smile. “He’ll be thrilled to see you guys, too.”

“Oh, it’s been ages!” Shining Armor said, his eyes lighting up. “I can't wait to brag about my new MODULAR Parasprite Golem mini, and—”

But before he could finish, Cadance gently rested a hoof on his shoulder, giving him a small, subtle shake of her head. “Why don’t we let Twilight, Edgar, and Trixie have some time together?” she suggested, her voice warm and full of encouragement. “We’ll see Spike when they’re back at the castle later. For now, we have… a few things we need to discuss here.”

Shining blinked, his ears perking in surprise as he turned to her. “We do?”

“Yes, we do,” Cadance replied with a meaningful look, her eyes twinkling with a hint of something that didn’t exactly need explaining. “It’ll give the three of them a chance to bond, don’t you think?”

"Riiight, we do!" Shining agreed, his expression shifting from confusion to realization. “You know what, you’re right, Cady. We’ll catch up with Spike later.”

Trixie tossed her mane, looking almost smug as she sidled up to me. "Oh, don’t worry, Sparkle. With Trixie around, this outing is guaranteed to be anything but boring."

Twilight let out a good-natured sigh, casting me a knowing smile. "Somehow, I don't doubt that."

Twilight rolled her eyes, clearing her throat loudly enough to interrupt the flirting. “Ahem! Anyway! Shall we?” She trotted forward, gesturing for us to follow, her eager grin suggesting she was more than ready to take on this outing.

As I got up and joined Twilight and Trixie near the door, I couldn’t help but feel the anticipation of the day ahead. With everything that had just gone down, maybe a simple trip for pants with a couple of ponies wasn’t such a bad way to unwind.

But just as I was about to step outside into the halls, something nagged at the back of my mind—an unsettled feeling, like I’d forgotten something important.

“Wait!” I blurted out, stopping dead in my tracks.

Twilight and Trixie both turned to look at me, alarmed. Twilight’s brow furrowed, her eyes filled with concern. “What is it, Edgar? Are you okay?”

Trixie’s ears flicked up, her face tense with worry. “Did you forget something?”

I paused, frowning as I searched for the right words.

“…What the heck am I going to wear on the way to Rarity's?” I asked, looking down very unsecured towel around my waist.

For a moment, there was a silence.

Then, Trixie let out a groan loud enough to echo off the walls, smacking her hoof against her forehead in exasperation.

Author's Note

I am sorry if this chapter seems simultaneously rushed and long-winded. I couldn't find a good stopping point, and wanted to finish up before I had to split this into two smaller chapters. Edgar's been stuck in the castle(let alone the bathroom) with DRAMA long enough. I think he's earned a completely normal day in Ponyville

Posting at 5:30 AM on Sunday, so I might be missing somethings or a word between words every now and then. If you see a mistake that absolutely annoys you, let me know! I'll be re-reading this in the afternoon tomorrow!

Otherwise, let me know how you guys like it, if anything seems confusing(or if there is a glaring issue), or if you have any questions you'd like me to PM you about.

Next chapter : ＡＣＯＭＰＬＥＴＥＬＹＮＯＲＭＡＬＤＡＹＩＮＰＯＮＹＶＩＬＬＥ！

Introduction: Braking into the Impossible(Rewritten)
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The Greatest Performance

Introduction: Braking into the Impossible(Rewritten)

"The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world. So, wake up...wake up and... smell the ashes..."

-The G-Man

Amidst the fog of war, the sounds of battle echo as angels’ tears fall upon the living. Now, two souls are fiercely entangled across the field. One battles risking the soul, a man who became a slave to his own ambition. Another, a noble soul, whose courage and faith are his greatest weapons. The air is drenched humid with acrid smoke and spattered crimson; no words are spoken. None are needed. One will live, and one must die.

Fate conspired to arrange their battle. Both men are of similar build, differing only in their states of mind. One, clutching a shortsword and shield, sweats and breathes heavily, body worn by battle but filled with vim, vigor, and the will to see things through. The other, wearing a crown not earned and wielding a long sword and dirk, his face a mix of terror, spite, and sorrow for facing an old friend.

In the growing silence, one finally speaks.

"Have you ever fought against someone you would once die for...? It's a strange feeling seeing you as who you truly are, an assassin here to bring Scotland to ruin," Macbeth says dejectedly, weapons clutched desperately.

"I'd still die for you. I'd fall on my blade now if there was even a chance you'd turn back...but that is too late now, isn't it? Lay down your sword Macbeth! If you live through this battle, they'll keep you alive for as long as possible- To punish you for every unspeakable atrocity you've committed against the people of our land. Please...let me end you quickly. That is all I can do for you now!" yells Macduff, once a friend.

"Do you think I wanted this? To become a monster for the sake of the people!? No, Macduff, but someone had to make the hard choices." His eyes glistened with a strange intensity, as if a fleeting vulnerability slipped through the cracks in his resolve. "For Scotland, I became what no one else could. If not me, some hellspawn even worse. The decisions I made—only I had the strength to carry their weight. Mark my words, should I fall today... it is only a matter of time before they find another monster to hunt. You will keep looking for monsters until all that's left is the reflection staring back at you in the mirror."

Macduff’s eyes hardened as he listened to Macbeth’s twisted justifications. The battle-worn knight stepped forward, his grip tightening on his shortsword.

“Hear yourself, Macbeth! A necessary evil? You speak of monsters as if their creation is some noble task—as if by slaughtering innocence, by bathing in blood, you’ve cleansed this land! You say you carry Scotland’s weight? No, my friend, you’ve buried its dignity beneath your sins!” His voice cracked with emotion, but his stance remained firm. “You claim to shield us from some greater terror, but what is left of the man I once knew?" He murmured, voice heavy with sorrow. "I once called you brother, but the man who wears that crown... is a stranger. One who hides behind lies, blinded by madness, too far gone to recognize his own reflection.”

He shifted his stance, preparing for the inevitable clash. One will live, and one must die—but it was clear to Macduff, his old friend was already dead.

"Don't lecture me, MacDuff. I see through the lies of your clan. I do not fear the dark side as you do." MacBeth paced away from his friend. "I have brought peace, justice, freedom, and security to my new Empire."

"Your new Empire?" MacDuff said reflexively, biting the inside of his cheek and doing his best not to break character.

"is this right?"

"Don't make me kill you..." MacBeth had no such issues. After all, his lines were quite in character.

"MacBeth, my allegiance is to the Royal Family. To the MONARCHY!"

"If you're not with me, you're my enemy." Macbeth said with a dangerously low voice, before holding up is sword. "NYOOOOUUM!"

"They're doing this again?"

MacDuff shook his head.

"Only a Little Shite deals in absolutes. I will do what I must-NYUUUM!" Macduff held up is sword in a high stance...igniting it in an imaginary glow.

"That's an absolute, Dingus! NYOOOOM again."

Macduff stepped forward, his sword raised high, voice unwavering. "You were my brother, Macbeth! I loved you!" He paused again. "...NYUUUM!"

The tension snapped as Macbeth snarled, raising his sword in response. "LIAR!" He leaped forward, letting their sabers of light clashed with an electrifying crack—

PSHHHHHH- WWoowoWO-PSHHHH!

"This is...really dumb."

"This is...Amazing. I wanna see where this goes."

"NYOOOOOOOOM!" Macbeth swung his blade, adding an overly dramatic whooshing sound as he pivoted. "do♪ Do♪ DO♪ DO♪ doDO!DO Do do!"

Okay...~Now~ it's getting dumb. He's doing the Darth Maul theme, not the Anakin versus Obi-wan theme.

"NNYYUUUM! HWUUUUAHHHH!" Macduff mirrored the action, both men now making lightsaber sounds, their faces locked in intense concentration as he finally did his best to mimic the chorus of Duel of the Fates. "♪CORN OOOOON♪~A COOOOOOOB♪... CORN ONNNNN♪... A KA BOOOOOOB♪

"King Lear never told you what happened to your father!" Macbeth bellowed in mock seriousness, his sword shaking as he pointed it accusingly at Macduff. "Duff...I am your father, Macduff!"

"But... But you're my brother!"

"I KNOW!!!" He broke out into a manic laugh.

"No...No that's not true!" Macduff shot back, voice quivering with exaggerated distress. "That's impossible! LITERALLY! We're both the same age!"

Suddenly, a voice from the shadows shattered the intensity.

"St-STOP, STOP! For the love of everything, CUT!" echoed from somewhere in the back of the room.

The grand battlefield disappeared as the dimly lit set blinked into the harsh light of reality. Wooden platforms, paint-splattered props, and half-assembled backdrops took the place of the war-torn field.

Edgar's P.O.V, First Person
Maples, Minnesota

It was 2:00 pm at Oakwater High School in Maples, Minnesota. Unless it was a half day and I was home playing computer games, I was usually in the last class of the day, Theatre.

My name is Edgar Jorgensen, a senior student in high school soon to graduate in a couple of days. I'm average in everything except math—I suck at math, but am strangely good at Economics. I have a few decent friends at school, but I'll admit that it took a while to figure out how to make the right friends.

In fact, when I first came to the school in my freshman year, I tried making friends with some dank gangster dudes.

*** flashback***

"You guys seen that new Miley Cyrus twerk vid? Holy shit, brah, that was ratchet as fuuuuuuuck."

There they were, the senior section, the hippest, most gangsta group of all the seniors.

'Ok. This is it, Eddy. Don't mess this up.' As I approached the table, the seniors looked more and more menacing.

I don't know if I can do this. What if I get bullied?

You know how when you need to pump yourself up, you hear a song in your head?

his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy...

Well, that kind of happened, and it inspired me to walk up there in the most civilized way possible.

"What's up, mah niggas? What's shaking? What's the word on the street, homie-gee?" I spoke, giving the most gangsta hand movements I could. "Get the lyrics I be rappin?"

...

end flashback

Needless to say, they weren't impressed. Did you know you can't say 'nigga' if you aren't black? I didn't , and because of this, they kicked my ass. Nobody else liked me the first year either because apparently if you're a freshmen, it is the law of high school that people really fucking hate you. I didn't understand it until I became a sophomore. Just know that if you are a freshmen, I probably hate you too when I first meet you.

Anyway, after my parents found out I got my ass thoroughly handed to me, they enrolled me in a martial arts class of my choosing. The closest dojo was an Aikido dojo, so I went with that. I'm not that far into it, and frankly it just feels like the Weenie Hut Jr. of Jujitsu or Judo. That being said, the people who are good at it and don't go all Steven Seagal with it ain't really anything to scoff at. My tiny-as-fuck five foot sensei could kick my ass any day of the week with his finger holds and wrist holds.

By senior year, I got pretty good too. I'm like a belt before brown, so I know how to break something if someone messes with me. Just not sure I could. However, its more focused on non-violence, so I've been encouraged to use the French martial art of "S'échapper et fuir" as well if all things go wrong. More than anything, I had to learn how to be decent under pressure and how to resolve situations before fighting, improving my people skills.

Anyway, enough of sniffing my own farts.

I was a very bored thespian at my high school's drama club taking the last theatre class of the day. Only taken two semesters though. I needed the extra credits, and I got to dick-around all day playing pretend. It was nice, and the improve games we played were fun. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do at the club; otherwise, I wouldn't apply for any part I could. I could be anyone but "Edgar", so it was a nice break from life. Besides, it was the last three days of school anyway, and I'm already passing with an A(as was literally everyone else in the class because theatre is really freakin easy), so no point in really taking it seriously. So...I improvised, and luckily for me, the first rule of improv is that "you can't say no".

If you're a secret service agent protecting the president's poodle, you better sweep that room for bugs and avocados. Someone says you are Celine Dion with smoker's cough, well you should honestly quit but it's your life, I guess. If you decide that Shakespeare's Macbeth needed to be reimagined for a modern audience and decided you needed to rip off a space opera, you may as well have fun with it so long as your other actors can't say no.

In case you were wondering, that was me playing Macbeth, but now I'm playing someone who finally got to tick-off Mr. Akers for the day.

Mr. Akers was pretty cool for an old guy. He’s the high school drama teacher, and he loves to inspire us to get creative and push boundaries. He’s the kind of teacher who always says things like, “There’s no wrong way to tell a story,” and he really believes it. He encourages us to experiment, take risks, and make bold choices in our performances. However, he doesn't like my bold choices.

"Eddy, what was that?" he asked, deadpan, in an almost disbelieving tone. Honestly, I don't see how he didn't expect this. "You had it down so perfectly, and then you just had to go and mess it up."

"Well, Mr. Akers, we only have like three days of school left until graduation. I figured I am allowed to goof off a little, since you got no more tests and our grades are high enough to pass anyway. Last time I'm gonna be able to mess around like this in school, so why not? I got plenty of time to play games, get a job, read a single book, yada-yada, but this is the last time I'm can be here, no?" I exclaimed with a smile on my face and a twinkle in my eye. Really, I was stalling for time until the bel-

*Brrr-ing*

And there it was.

As I got ready to pack up and leave, I was stopped. The bell had saved me this time, but Akers wasn’t going to let me go that easy.

"Ed, I need you to stay for a bit," Mr. Akers called out, crossing his arms like some wise sage about to hand down life lessons.

Great. Here we go.

I slumped back into my chair, trying to shake off the lingering adrenaline from our ridiculous, but completely necessary, lightsaber duel. "Yeah, sure thing."

As the last of my classmates filtered out, chatting about graduation plans and summer jobs, I tapped my foot. I knew what was coming, and frankly, I didn’t care. Not really. Akers was cool but man, he had a tendency to try and get real deep on you when you least needed it. Like that one teacher that thinks they are Robin Williams from Dead Poets Society.

"Edgar," he began, sliding into that calm, teacher voice, "You know I like you, right?"

"Are...Are you coming on to me?" I ask, hoping to fluster him.

No such flustering happened though. He was used to my antics at this point, and reciprocated with a middle finger. He made sure his hand showed his wedding band.

Was it okay or even professional for a teacher to do this? Probably not, but Mr. Akers and I go waaaay back. Well, as much as you can in a few short years. I love the fact that I can talk and joke around him like I normally would with anyone else.

He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "That’s part of the problem, Ed. You don’t take anything seriously."

"You enable me." I shrugged, not even bothering to hide the smirk. "What’s there to take seriously, Mr. Akers? There are no plays or grades or anything anymore. Were just having fun messing around playing improve games like freezeframe or quiet bench while we wait for the year to end. It’s fun."

"Fun’s good," he admitted, pacing in front of the "chalkboard", of which the class had none but had to pretend there was one anyway. It was more hands on than that. "But there’s more to life than just messing around."

I nodded along, but my mind had already started drifting. I knew what he was saying. Hell, maybe part of me even agreed with him. Still, it wasn’t like I needed to worry about that now. Graduation was in a few days, and my whole summer was mapped out with gaming marathons and chilling with my buddies. Akers was acting like life was gonna hit me like a truck the second I got my diploma. I wasn’t planning on getting run over anytime soon.

As Mr. Akers droned on, my brain had long since checked out, coasting through his lecture on autopilot. Sure, I knew he was talking about something important—"the real world" and "responsibility"—but...he's done this a few times already, and when you hear like twelve, you hear them all. Really, I just spent time getting hyped up for a few shows. Game of Thrones, that other horse show that is coming on Netflix. Something "Bobo the Jacked horse", and the start of Season five of My Little Pony getting teased.

Ok, I know, it's a show to sell toys for little girls. Laugh it up...

...You done?

...How about now?

...

Quit calling me a neckbeard!

...Ok, to be fair, it is better than you'd think. The same chick that did Foster's home for imaginary friends and a few other shows worked on it. It's got fantastic humor, and the characters are so hilarious that I end up borrowing a lot of jokes and lines from the show in my improv and "totally original characters". If only the rest of the glass new where I was getting my material.

"Edgar, stop acting retarded."

Wait, what? I snapped back to attention, head jerking up like a puppet. Did he really just say that? Akers, Mr. Theater is for Everyone Akers, just drop that in our conversation?

I shot him a confused look. "Did you really just-"

Akers looked at me, not missing a beat, arms crossed, expression deadpan. "Oh? Oh ~now~ you're listening after I've already been talking for a few minutes." His tone shifted from casual to sharp, like he knew exactly how to hit a nerve. "And since I finally have your attention, you're right. You’re graduating in a few days, and I’m telling you, you can't go through life thinking everything’s a joke. Got any plans?" I nodded my head.

"Plans for the future? As in living and working and buying a house?"

...

I shook my head.

"You're about to step out into the real world, and it’s not gonna go easy on you just because you can crack a few jokes or improvise your way through a scene. Maybe if you wanted to be a stuntman or something like that with those flips and rolls that you do, but you haven't even thought that far ahead, have you?

I try not to roll my eyes. Typical Mr. Akers—always talking about how life isn’t some big play where you can ad-lib your way through. But I lean back in my seat, deciding to humor him. “Okay, but… ‘the r-word,’ though? Really?”

“That’s what you’re getting out of this?” Akers doesn’t miss a beat. "Gawh-lee, I'm glad could retire if I wanted to. Your generation gets more and more sensitive by the year." He sighs, shaking his head. He rubs his temples, then looks me dead in the eye. Look, Edgar, you’ve got potential. Real potential. But you don't have the attitude to make the best of it. You gotta fix that or you'll be stuck just sitting on the computer day in and day out looking at your cat videos"

I wonder what he would think if I told him it was actually pony videos...

"You're excused, Edgar. I just needed to remind you that you need to grow up eventually."

"Thanks, Mr. Akers. I'll, uh, think about it," I mumbled, heading for the door without another word.

"...later" I thought to myself.

As I drove through the woods on my way home, still mulling over Mr. Akers' speech, my mind wandered to the last four years. What had I even done? Yeah, I was "moderately active," but that mostly meant sitting on the computer, watching YouTube or that pony show I’d never admit to liking in public. I never really did anything. Prom? Never went. Girlfriends? Never lasted more than a month, and to be fair that was on me. Sweeping the dojo was about as close to a job as I’d gotten, but it felt more like an unpaid intern. It’s not like I wasn’t aware that I was skating through life. It's just…reality checks suck.

My thoughts fizzled when the sky outside darkened out of nowhere. One second, I was cruising down the empty road, and the next, it was like someone flipped a switch. I squinted at the dashboard clock—2:45 PM. No way it should be this dark.

Instinctively, I flipped on the headlights. That’s when I saw it.

The familiar Minnesota woods had turned into something completely different. Darker. More...alive somehow. The trees were all wrong and not the tall pine trees or deciduous trees that I've grown accustom to. Instead, they appeared to be replaced by trees with vines hanging off some of them that weren't native to Minnesota. The road wasn’t straight anymore, either...in fact it was less of a asphalt road and more like a muddy trail twisting through some creepy forest that definitely hadn’t been there five minutes ago. But that wasn’t even the freakiest part.

Dead center in the road, there was a beat-up caravan or wagon. The colorful and bombastic kind you’d expect in a traveling circus or something. It was charred and smoking like it had just survived a barbecue gone wrong. I blinked, my grip tightening on the wheel. What the hell?

Then I saw her.

No fucking way...

A cerulean-blue unicorn, complete with a starry wizard hat and cape, was standing on the side of the caravan. She looked exactly like...no, she was Trixie.

THE Great and Powerful Trixie!!!

The funny-talking magician from MLP! This was impossible. It had to be a hallucination or some kind of messed-up dream. I felt my heart racing, and my brain couldn’t process it. Did I pass out from car emissions on the road!?! God I hope not!

But before I could even try to wrap my head around that, I noticed what she was doing. Her horn was glowing bright, and flames—actual flames—were shooting out of it, slamming into...another beam of fire.

My eyes darted to the other side of the caravan, and I nearly choked.

A dragon. An actual, full-sized, 8-foot-tall, red-scaled dragon. The kind you see in fantasy movies, only way more terrifying in real life. It was spewing fire right back at Trixie, who was in the middle of some Dragon Ball Z style beam struggle.

I could barely breathe. This was...wrong. None of this should be happening, right? Trixie and dragons weren’t real. They couldn’t be real. Yet, here they were, battling it out like it was no big deal.

Okay, calm down. Just brake. Just...

But before I could think straight, I realized something worse. The road wasn’t asphalt anymore—it was mud. And I wasn’t cruising along at fifty. I was still going fast, but the forest floor had turned to muck, and as I slammed on the brakes, the Mustang’s tires skidded and slipped like I was driving on ice. My tires weren't made for this!

I had to be going at least Forty miles an hour...thirty five...thirty...

Oh shit.

I yanked the wheel, but it was too late. The car lurched forward, and my heart plummeted into my stomach. I couldn’t stop. I was going to hit the dragon straight into its side.

I-I’d like to go home now...

*CRASH*

Author's Note

Update 12/23/2023: for newer viewers. My writing style has changed quiet a bit since I started this story back up, and I am looking back at my older style and cringing. As such, I will be working on rewrites off and on just to clean it up for inconsistencies and so that you'd have a better idea of what the story would be like soon. Just know that it does change for the better if it seems cringy right now.

Update 10/11/2024: Finished a rewrite of my first chapter while doing my best to keep what I was going for in line with my prior thoughts. If you are reading this and I haven't edited the next two chapters yet, be warned it will be a bit jarring.

Chapter Nine: Introductions, Interrogations, they both start with an "I" - 1/3
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The Greatest Performance

Chapter Nine: Introductions, Interrogations, they both start with an "I" - 1/3

"Sometimes paranoia's just having all the facts."

-William S. Burroughs

***Edgar's POV***
*Guest Room*

The next morning came and started as most might expect.

You wake up having no idea who or where you are and freak out for about a second, but then as soon as you wake up bit you start to remember what happened right before you went to sleep. In my case it was feeling hungry and sore. I rub away those little eye-boogers you get when you wake up and started to stretch myself, only to realize that I was still bandaged. So after stretching everything but the parts that were bandaged, I lay back down and try to go back to sleep. I knew I probably wasn't going to go back to sleep anytime soon, but I really like the feeling of laying down right when you wake up. It's euphoric.

After about half an hour I decided to get up and out of the harsh rays of sunlight that are plaguing me. They were fine yesterday, but this morning they seem to have made it their mission to ruin the afterglow of waking up. So after I answered the call of nature (which is harder then it sounds when only one hand isn't bound), I started to limp over to the exit. Using the wall as support, I made my way out of the room to see if I can rustle up some food since I haven't eaten any real substance since yesterday morning.

*smack*

...Only to have my face flatten against some invisible force in the doorway, which caused me to fall flat on my ass. After yelling a very choice word(use your imagination), I rubbed my thumping nose and looked back at this unseen wall. I saw some fog from my breath left over on it. It was starting to fade but it was noticeable nonetheless. I reach out for it and eventually my palm flattened against the clear, cool, and smooth surface. When I ascertained that it probably wasn't going to kill me, I gave it a couple knocks.

It was glass alright, but the sound it gave off when I knocked on it suggested it was thick. Like really thick, almost like the kind you would see in an aquarium that kept sharks or dolphins. On the other side of the glass wall appeared to be another glass wall, only this one had a whiter tint and very faint symbols scratched into it. It was so fine, that if I didn't run into any of the glass, I probably wouldn't have noticed any of them. I followed the glass upward and saw that they were bolted to the crystal tree branch...crystal wall column... They were bolted to the pillar that was attached to the wall, or...is that a latch? Is it supposed to move?

I couldn't even fathom how they managed to make this so quickly, nor how they managed to do this while I was sleeping, but that's all the moot point though. Right now, there are so many questions that are much more important than that. Questions like "Why?" and "Who?" were the more dominant ones at the moment. However, there was one question above all others that I just couldn't get out of my head.

"The fuck?!?"

***Trixie's POV***
*Dining hall*

We were currently situated in the dining hall, eating Apple spiced oatmeal like every other pony in here. It as regal as this place was meant to look, it was leaning more towards soup kitchen because of the large cauldrons of varying types of oatmeal. Well, as much variety as you can get when the main ingredient of every single one is apple and oatmeal. The bustling ponies that were either in line for their bowl or currently eating, sitting on the ground pushed this image. It wasn't all bad though as most of them actually seemed genuinely happy, almost as if this was a indoor picnic. Whether it was because they knew everything was going to be alright, or they knew they had to have a positive attitude I couldn't tell. But this sense of community still brightened the mood immensely and eased everyone else's feelings. Even Pinkie Pie, who was currently making foal faces at a pair of giggling twin foals a few tables over the distance, seemed to emanate a feeling of ease. I just wish either she or the ponies at the table I was at could do the same thing for me.

We were all sitting at a corner table of the large crystalline hall. I myself haven't even touched my bowl of oatmeal aside from playing with the apple slice on top. I already felt sick to my stomach after last night and didn't have much of an appetite.

"Ya know, it could just be a REALLY big misunderstanding. You thought Edgar was a dragon too, didn't you Twilight? An Anti-magic dragon sounds pretty spooky. " I heard the annoyingly cheerful voice of Pinkie Pie say, obviously trying to comfort me. She then bit the side of her bowl and lifted her head up, letting the contents of the bowl dump into her gullet. "If any-phing, sheesh probabry awarding him tickish to the Grand Gawwoping Gawa. Iph you shave Ponyviwwe emouph timesh, you get'em imm da maiyl." She tried to say with a mouth still full of oatmeal, oblivious to the judgmental stare of the white Unicorn mare off to her side.

"...Manners, Pinkie darling."

"If he tries anything, I swear I'll pulverize 'em." A voice from above me threatened.

"Um, weren't you just talking about how awesome and brave he was last night."

"Oh come on, that was like ten hours ago! Besides, I was totally playing Nightmare's advocate." The brash tomcolt spoke, before looking off to the side and coughing. "Of course, That's IF he tries anything. Otherwise, I'm super chill with him being here. He beat up changelings and doesn't afraid of anything."

"...Proper Equish, Rainbow darling." Rarity shook her head. "Doesn't it seem a bit odd that all this is happening so suddenly? I mean I know that trouble like this is always a bit-flip away around our group, but something feels wrong about all of this. What if Celestia thinks that the human is a threat? After all, he is a forei- an outsi- oh shoot, he's not from around here."

"You could try using "hero", and his name is Edgar." I chastised, starting to get mildly irritated at the posh unicorn.

Look at her, that two-faced whorse. Just last night she was fluttering her perfect little eyelashes at Edgar, and now she is talking about him like he's some sort of monster. It's outrageous, and those eyelashes are probably fake!

Rarity looked to Twilight, and almost as if they had some silent understanding, they both looked back at me with worried eyes.

"Trixie, I am trying to be objective..." Rarity stopped what she as saying and looked around the room for a second. After a few moments she looked back at me and opened her mouth to speak again, only to close it once more. "There's no easy way to say it, is there?" She asked, turning to Twilight.

"Say what? Sparkle, what's she saying?" I looked at her, begging for an answer. Twilight looked reluctant to answer at first, she glanced over to me and spoke.

"Trixie, if Celestia decides that he is indeed a threat, then you might not see him again." Twilight said solemnly.

"Yea, she'll just banish him back to his tree in the jungle, right?" Pinkie asked. After a bit of silence, I saw hair started to deflate and go limp like a balloon. "...Bu-because she will just banish him back to his home...right?"

"Oh no..." Fluttershy said as she hung her head low. The others soon followed suite as the mood went darker.

I didn't get it, why wouldn't it matter what his name was? It's like they're insinuating that...

No, they can't be serious.

"How could you SAY something like that?!?" I yelled them, slamming my hooves at the table, causing everypony at this table and a few other tables to turn their heads in surprise.

"Darling, I understand you're upset. I really do, but you must calm down." Rarity said in placating manner. "Please. We don't want to make the other ponies worried." She tilted her head toward the other tables, motioning at the ponies sitting there.

I slowly slink back into my seat. I am far from calm right now, but apparently it was enough for the other ponies to stop paying attention.

"This is a bad joke. It has to be. Edgar wouldn't hurt a fly, let alone another pony." I pleaded to the group.

""Wouldn't hurt a fly"?" Applejack butted in incredulously. "Now that's a load of crab apples. Ah don't claim to be the shiniest apple in the bushel, but an army invaded and he killed 'em all! That don't pass the sniff-test, Sugarcube."

"And if Trixie recalls, he saved your little munchkin and this entire town, you inbred!" I shouted at Applejack.

"Care ta' repeat that, sugacube?" Applejack asked, placing her both her hooves on the table in an aggressive stance. I couldn't tell whether or not that was unintentional or because she wanted to brawl, or if she meant to do that to scare me into backing down. Frankly, I didn't care about what any of them thought at this point. Edgar wasn't here to defend himself, so if nopony else was going to stand up for him then I will have to do it. I slipped a large feather out from one of the pockets sewn into my cloaks lining and held it in my magical grasp, causing a wince and wide eyes from Applejack.

"You put that thing away." Applejack said, slowly lowering herself back to her seat.

"You don't know what Edgar is like. None of you do!" I told them flat out.

"And I suppose you know him so much better then us, Missus "met-him-yesterday"?" Rarity brought up.

"I known him for twice as long." I countered.

"Two days then. Like that's sooo much better." She sighed as she shook her head. "Look. We all saw the letter and the way it was worded. The last few times Celestia acted this drastically was when either Discord or Tirek returned. I would argue it may even be worse!"

"I'm sure there is a plausible explanation for all this. After all, Princess Celestia has been around for a very long time and is a very wise ruler. Surely there must be a good reason for wanting this done." Twilight told me, probably hoping to ease my nerves.

It didn't work.

Neither Twilight or I have gotten a wink of restful sleep since the sleepover last night, the bags under our eyes confirmed this. It took Twilight casting a sleeping spell on us both just to get a couple hours of sleep, but even then I had nothing but nightmares.

It was around midnight at the small mansion Twilight called "her room". When first walked in I hardly noticed Applejack teasing Rainbow Dash, or Pinkie passed out cuddling Spike and those three fillies everyone worried about. I was stricken with awe as to how a room this big could fit in the castle. And here I thought Edgar's room was huge. Seriously, it was bonkers how big this room was. To put it in perspective, I noticed a walk-in closet right next to the bathroom door, and the interior of that could probably swallow my caravan when it was it's normal size.

The bucking closet was bigger then my home...

I didn't let myself linger on those thoughts for long and forcibly un-slack jawed myself to maintain some sense of composure.

Anyway, it started out as a blast. We were doing our makeup, we pigged out on ice cream were talking about how our weeks have been, played a version of "truth or dare" mixed with "spin the bottle". All being done while we did our best to avoid talking about what happened earlier today, but there was still a clear tension in the air surrounding the Farm Mare and Twilight. They were smiling as they joined in on our games, but they did not seem to be enjoying each others company as much as they were enjoying the company of everypony else.

Afterwards, Rainbow smacked Twilight with a pillow and things got a little crazy. So after smacking each other around with pillows for a while (I still don't see how Fluttershy could be so brutal with a fluffy sack of feathers), we did a mix of truth or dare and spin the bottle. After everything was done with and everypony decided to turn in for the night, things took a turn for the worst.

***Last night***

Edgar...

Edgar...

While everypony else was asleep, I found myself restless. I just couldn't stop thinking about him. How he kept getting into stupid situations, his infuriating attitude about his near death experience...the stupid way he smiled at me when he told me to go have fun. I know he said that I should go and enjoy myself, but how could I do that when he's left alone all by himself?

*Rustle Rustle*

My ears twitched as I heard some rustling. Curious, I peeked one eye open just to see who it was. I heard the sound of mumbling, and with a sharp breath, a purple princess woke up, leaning up in a startled state before starting to calm down after a few moments later. I guess Twilight couldn't sleep much either as got up, rubbing her eyes as she stretched in the moonlight. Suddenly her horn started glowing as to illuminate her surroundings, scanning the room to see if anypony else was awake, but I guess she didn't notice my eyes slightly opened. It seems as if she was awakened from a nightmare before starting to get up.

What is she doing?

Twilight got up and started to walk over to her desk, yawning all the while. When she got there, she levitated a parchment and quill over to her.

Does she ever stop writing??? I mean, how much paper did she use up earlier? Is that what happened to that old treehouse of hers? She turned it into paper?

It was when I heard her start talking to herself as well that l shut up my inner monologue and I started to pay attention.

"Dear Princess Celestia," Twilight started, using the glow of her horn to Illuminate what is possibly a letter to Princess Celestia. "I know that it is late, or very early for this, and that you are probably busy with making sure Canterlot and the rest of the other cities are safe, but I made a promise to you. I promised you that if I ever discovered something new about the magic of friendship that you would be one of the first ponies to know. I have written to you so many times in the past, with each letter I wrote, the more excited I felt about the next lesson I would learn. This feels like cheating, but I wanted to ask for your help."

"In the aftermath of the attack on Ponyville, I did my duties as optimally and diligently as possible, but with each decision made, it felt as if I had a paraspite sitting on my shoulder, whispering that the decision I just made was going to get somepony hurt."

"I scheduled double guard shifts with Luna's aid, I allotted ration amounts for the coming days in case an aid shipment was delayed. I did headcounts with Mayor Mare to make sure everypony else was still safe and unharmed, but I still felt powerless. Princess Luna told me that I made the only decision that I could when I sealed off the castle, and I believe her. My mind is telling me that it was the only one to be made, but my heart is tearing into me. It makes me sick to my stomach. The "right" decision couldn't have been to abandon my friends."

I started to hear sniffling.

"Applejack's sister was outside that barrier, and I don't think our friendship is going to be the same. I thought Apple Bloom was going to die and still kept the shield up. I would have gladly traded places with Apple Bloom in a heartbeat if I could, but this is a worthless thought since I still kept it up. I know what I ended up choosing... That voice in the back of your head. The one that tells you that you are worthless and everything that you are doing is wrong...Does it ever go away? How do I fight it and still stay "me"? I want you to teach me how to be strong like you. I want to be worthy of the title you passed down onto me. I want to protect everypony, and I don't think I can handle being put in a spot where I have to choose between lives again. What would you have done? Could I have still protected them?" I could see tiny shimmers of liquid falling from Twilight's face and landing on the parchment she was writing on, rubbing her eyes once she saw the few droplets start to stain the scroll.

I could feel a tear coming to my eye as I found it a little harder to breath myself. She is not okay after yesterday, and she is still beating herself up about it.

Come on, coward. Get up and tell her its not her fault. Tell her that she did all she could, and that everything is going to be okay. Do something!

I couldn't muster the will to do such a thing though. What could I even say to make it better?

Twilight paused, and I thought she was going to end it on that depressing note, but then the somber look that was on her face soon faded, as if to distract herself. "Princess Luna has been helping me. Along with her and some newfound friends, we managed to make the best of this situation. Princess Luna brought aid and stability to Ponyville, the two others each helped out in their own way. One of them was the last Unicorn I would have expected to see. Her name is "Trixie", or "The Great and Powerful Trixie", as she would prefer." Twilight chuckled as she shook her head, her voice starting to brighten up. I would like to think that she was doing what I was and reminiscing the times we had together.

Like that one time I enslaved the entire town with a corrupting magic amulet that she had to trick me into taking off? Good times, good times.

"I think I told you about her before. When I first met her, I found her to be both arrogant and infuriating. It wasn't until today that I believed that she is truly making an effort to change herself." She stopped writing for a split second, but then started up again. "A few of my friends in Ponyville lashed out at me because my inability to protect them and my decisions afterword. Some coming from those that were left outside, and some coming from those that were inside the barrier. I even experienced some backlash from my best friends, and though I know it was because they were scared, it hurt because they were all right to do so. Trixie helped bring out my good side, however, and it made dealing with this much easier. She's not perfect by any means, nor was she a pony I wanted to see anytime soon, but I think I needed her yesterday. I didn't realize it until about an hour ago. I know that she's a good pony at heart, and she did more than enough to prove it yesterday. Although she may stumble along the way, I feel that I may have much to learn about friendship from her."

Wow. I don't know what to say except that I felt confused and strangely flattered. Twilight still needs to give herself more credit. She has money, fame, success, and an entire town that loves her despite what she is thinking. She rubs elbows with the Princesses, has incredibly loyal friends, and probably has stallions throwing themselves at her feet. She has everything I don't have and more...How could she ever need somebody like me?

"The other pony was something I certainly did not expect. They're not even a pony. He said he was a "He-you-mahn", which was a creature from a different world! Trixie said he fought off a dragon, which seemed like another tall tale of hers until he fought off the entire changeling army by himself. I was amazed, but I wasn't as surprised after I found out about his unique immunity to magic. Because of this however, we couldn't heal him with normal means. He should be resting right now, and while he definitely looks "out of this world", he seems friendly enough and has this calming nature about him. I don't quite know what it is about him, but Trixie seemed almost attached at the hip while he was answering my questions after only knowing him for a day. Maybe I'm overthinking things, but I'm almost certain that there is more then meets the eye when it comes to him."

Twilight stopped talking for some reason. Taking a small peak, I saw her roll up that parchment whilst tying it, and picking up another fresh clean one.

"I guess I really went off on a tangent there, didn't I? Maybe I'm just tired and rambling on. I guess what I'm trying to say is in the aftermath of that dark hour that I've seen these ponies shine the brightest. They were....they were brighter than me, and maybe through whatever light they have, I thought that I could learn something from them. From all of this, but I just don't see it." She wiped her eyes and looked deep in thought, before speaking again. "What do you think? What was I supposed to learn?" Twilight paused, as if she was awaiting an answer from the sheet of paper, which never came. She then shut her eyes and took a deep breath, holding a hoof to her chest. After about a few seconds passed, she released her breath while extending her foreleg out. Sealing the scroll with a ribbon, she quietly started to tip-hoof over to where the dragon was sleeping.

*Clip-Clop Clip-Clop*

"Spike...Spike" she whispered, trying to gently shake him awake.

The young drake's eyes seemed dazed and confused, half-lidded and on the verge of closing again until Twilight waved the two scrolls in front of him, prompting a tired huff.

"Twiiii~liiiight, can't it wait until tomorrow?" she questioned in an annoyed whine.

Twilight put on the puppy-dog eyes as she lightly shook the two scrolls she had in her magic.

"Please Spike? I promise I won't bug you for the rest of the night or day tomorrow."

A deep sigh came from the drake as he took the scrolls in his claws.

"Gee Twilight, two scrolls?!?" he chuckled, blowing a small ball of fire into them as they disappeared, illuminating the room for a moment. "Alright. Going back to sleep."

"And Spike?"

"Yea, Twilig-ahg!?" Spike said as he turned around and was surprised with a spontaneous snuggle hug, powerless to pry his way out. "Hey, enough already."

"Thanks for sticking around with me all these years." She said sweetly." I know that I can be a pain in the flank sometimes and I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate everything you do."

Ohhhhhhhh, that's so ADORABLE!

Smiling, I closed my eyes and tried to get back to sleep again after that sweet note. It was bittersweet, and I would have plenty of time to talk to Twilight tomorrow anyway. But like my luck so far, that HAD to get ruined.

*𝔹𝕦𝕦𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕡*

"EEP! Spike, what was that for?!?" Twilight jumped, whispering harshly as the smell of burnt hair complemented the whooshing sound that the tail was making.

Ok, Maaaaaaaybe Trixie can stay up a bit longer.

I peeked my eyes open from under the blanket as I saw the last moment of Twilight patting out the smoke from her tail. I had to be careful not to giggle loud enough for them to know I'm awake, but I still smiled a little at the scene that was happening.

"I didn't do it on purpose, Look." Spike said with a sudden alertness, as he pointed at the ground behind her, where an object encased in flames was burning. When the dancing fire finally subsided, a deep ivory colored scroll appeared on the ground in place of the flames. Though, it seemed to lack the care that was put into Twilight's letter. Unlike Twilight's, the ribbon was almost tied on there hastily and without much effort in perfection.

"That was fast." Twilight commented while she levitated the scroll off of the ground and began untying the ribbon.

*𝔹𝕦𝕦𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕣𝕡*

Spike burped out another scroll, only this one seemed was wrapped with blue ribbon. The scroll was made of a very thin paper, and looked very old and discolored. Twilight and Spike looked at each other.

"Gee...twoooo scrolls..." Spike commented as he started turning back toward the scroll on the ground.

Twilight finished unraveling the ribbon around the scroll she currently had in her magical grip and began to peruse it. She froze for a second or two before rereading it again, this time she looked like she was reading it even faster as her eyes quickly darted to the left and right.

"Well, what is it Twilight?" I heard Spike ask.

"Spike, run to the barracks and tell the thestrals and any unicorn who can make a barrier to meet me in the main hall. I have to find Luna." Twilight seemed to cast a spell on the double doors for some reason, then fled out the double doors as she galloped down the halls.

"Twilight, what's going on? You weren't raised in a barn." Spike chided as he ran out to follow her before the pitter patter of his scaled feet stopping to close the door behind him. His voice echoed in the hall. " Come on, you promised I could go back to sleep!"

"Spike, just do it!" Twilight echoed from far off the hallway.

As they rushed hastily out of the room, they neglected to bring the scroll that caused this commotion.

It couldn't be another changeling attack. If it was, then why wouldn't she want to wake up all her other friends? Curious at why she was behaving so drastically, I slowly got out of my sleeping bag and crept over to the table as quietly as a creature with hooves could. While I'm pretty sure this may be illegal, I need to make sure its not anything to do with me. I don't want to have to make a hasty getaway at the last minute unless I have to. So I took the scroll in my magical grasp and began to read through it.

Twilight,

Do not lose sight of that human for a moment. Refrain from physically touching him. Arriving shortly are detailed blueprints of a containment procedure that MUST be used to negate the threat his race's super-magical properties possess. I understand that my sister is also lending her aid over at the moment, and will view this as a somewhat drastic measure. Should she question this, or even try to impede your progress. Stand your ground. You are a princess, this is your castle, and this is of the highest priority right now. If, for some, reason you should fail in convincing her, show her this scroll. Although she might not agree with it immediately, Luna will at least allow you to continue.

I wish I didn't have to put you in this situation, and I wish I could be more descriptive as to my sudden sense of urgency, but this is a matter of utmost secrecy and security. If the creature you described is what I believe it to be, many lives could be in danger.

I will be there tomorrow afternoon, so before you rest for the night, please make sure you place some of the night guard on the task of assembling the said blueprint whilst keeping a close watch over it.

I will see you soon. Until then, please keep yourself safe, my faithful student.

~Princess Celestia

P.S. Luna, this is real. Don't even try to argue with me. You owe me after that Mullen Mouth incident.

P.S.S. Twilight, I am concerned for you and I would like to make time for us to speak about your letter. Please find me when you are free tomorrow. Otherwise, I am sure I will find you sometime tomorrow.

"...Oh Buck." I whispered almost in reflex. As I felt the sudden chill in my spine after reading that, I glanced over toward the other sleeping ponies, then back to the scroll. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I reread it again just to see if this was a joke or if I simply misread it, but there was no mistake.

What is this? What in Tartarus is this? WHAT IS THIS?!?

What did Edgar do to get himself in trouble? Celestia didn't discover that he was lying already, did she? No, there's no way she could have. She wasn't even here to meet him yet. And secondly, what super-magical properties??? Last time we checked, he was anti-magic. Wait...if he's in trouble, what does that make me? I've had my fair share of issues with Ponyville, and since I lead Edgar here, they'll probably see me as an accomplice to whatever they think he was doing.

...We have to get out here. As I started to sneak toward the door, I felt a large burst of wind and bright flash of light behind me.

"I'll even show you the letter." I heard Twilight's voice whisper loudly from behind me as there was a large, papery crinkle sound.

Buck!

I turned around and saw Twilight and Spike, both looking at a very large, dark pony that was reading the scroll. The parchment was blocking her face, but with a horn THAT long peeking over the page and the fact that I don't suffer from short term memory loss, I know that has to be Princess Luna.

Double Buck!

Due to her horn moving from the left and right, I assuming she was shaking her head.

"We are unconvinced." Princess Luna said. "Surely this is a badly thought out jest."

"I don't think Princess Celestia is the type to joke in a time like this. Look, it's her seal." Twilight pointed out with hoof. She was biting her lip in nervousness as she waiting for Luna's answer.

"Of all the foolish, moronic, absolutely..." Princess Luna said, her anger starting to rise. As the tone of her voice started to raise, it stopped all of a sudden as I heard her exhale deeply through her nose. I could have sworn I saw a dark mist coming out from the other side of the parchment. The voice still had anger to it, but sounded almost like a whisper-yell."Why in Tartarus are we wasting resources better spent on securing our township with imprisoning an ally!?!"

They haven't noticed me yet.

I don't know it was the poor lighting of the room, if it was them being distracted with all of this being thrown at them, or if I was just naturally really stealthy, but I figured it would probably be a very good idea if I skedaddled the heck out of the room as slowly and quietly as possible. Putting one hoof behind the other, I backpedaled towards the door of Twilight's room while they were distracted by what they were speaking of.

*Clip-Clop*

Ohhhh, why are hooves so LOUD?

Amazingly enough, none of the ponies seemed to notice that hooves make noise on tile as I made my way to the door...but it looks like the drake just did.

"Uhhh, Twilight?" Spike said, nudging Twilight as he stared at me.

"One second, Spike. This is important." She brushed off, completely oblivious to me making my way out. Whether it is just dumb luck or fate I wasn't going to let the fact that they were that distracted go to waste. "Maybe Celestia knows something we don't. I haven't lived as long as you both have, and you were gone for a thousand years." She tried to reason, almost as if to convince herself more then Luna.

*Clip-Clop Clip-Clop*

Come on, the door is RIGHT THERE!!!!

I was inches away from the door. If I could juuuust reach it...

"Twilight, I Reeeeally think you shoul-"

"Spike, is this really the time? "Twilight whispered in a frustrated tone. As she was now fixating her gaze on him for a few moments before turning back to Princess Luna.

The young drake rolled his eyes and huffed. He looks like he's been through this song and dance before, and turned back toward me. This time however, he raised his claws and...shooed me away, as if to say "carry on".

...

*Clip-Clop Clip-Clop*

After what felt like an eternity of agonizing the tension, I finally place my hoof on the door and get ready to push it open.

"Are you suuuure, Twilight?"

"SPIKE, what is so important that you have to keep interrupting-"

*SSSQUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAK*

I barely even tapped the door to open it before the weight of the door caused it to start to swing open on its own, causing an excruciatingly long squeak of an unoiled door hinge to interrupt all other sounds in the room.

...Are you serious.

Slowly, the other mares in the room started to wake up with yawns and mumbles. The door's high pitch screech was enough to wake them but more importantly, it gained the attention of the two Princesses, as Princess Luna lowered the letter from the front of her face with her magic aura casting a light right at my silhouette. The magic from her horn illuminated her face, showing that she was not amused. She had an annoyed look, and I could have sworn I saw her left-eye twitch. Twilight also seemed a little worried as she looked at me and then shifted her eyes between Luna and I a few times.

...

*SSSQUUEEEEAK*

I tried to continue opening the door faster before but it was stopped by a blue glow of Princess Luna's Magic.

"I have to go to the restroom?" I lied with the vain hope that she would believe me.

"Hold it in." Princess Luna commanded as the door behind me shifted itself closed with an Azure blue glow. A click signified that the door was locked by her. "Let us have small discussion, Miss Lulamoon. Tell us how you have become acquainted with Edgar."

.....Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck

***Edgar's Pov***
*Current time*

"Can I ask where you're taking me?" I asked the guards.

"No."

"Could we at least go grab something to eat?"

"No."

"Please? I'm starving here!"

'No."

"Is "no" the only thing you guys can say?" I asked rhetorically. The male pegasus on my right didn't say anything else after that, and in the back of my mind I gave a little mental cheer that he didn't say no again. On my left however, the Female Thestral that stayed silent and seemed to think about this for moment before smiling a cheeky little grin.

"No."

That did little to help my mood

It isn't every day that I'm being escorted down the hall of a tree castle to either be executed, thrown into a prison, or experimented on. Most would think I am just having an hyperactive imagination and I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, and they are probably right. But when I am getting escorted to an unknown location, for an unknown reason, and all I am getting out of the ten armored ponies that are escorting me are grunts and "no's", I can get pretty freaking worried.

The makeup of the Guards seem to be a mix all the races of ponies that I have seen so far, though with the Pegasi and Earth Ponies the closest to me. They seem to be split half and half on either side of me, with a mixed formation of Solar and Lunar guards.

While their walks are relatively slow, it was clear that they wanted to speed things up as they took very deliberate and calculated steps. They just couldn't cause while I was doing the best I could, it still hurt to walk. That's not to say that I probably couldn't. While I kept feeling dull thumps from each step that felt, the biggest pain and annoyance I felt was from the Bandages that were chaffing me and restricting my movements, and this fucking headache that just won't go away.

Surely they noticed shear amount of bandages Fluttershy put on me. At the very least, they could have got me a walking cane or something to help with this Cancerous Migraine. What would they even give me? An icepack, Advil...Horse Tranquilizers? Eh, the later is seemingly more tempting by the second.

As we made a right turn, my eyes fell upon a white double-door down the hallway. It was big and obvious, so if I had to make a guess, I would have assumed that that is where these guards wanted to take me. I sped my hobbling up, just to get this over with and have a chance to rest my feet. As I suspected, the royal guards with hastened their walk to match me.

This proved to be a very stupid move, as I started to feel dizzy and nauseous, to the point where if I actually ate something this morning, I would have threw it up. My body couldn't keep up with the physical and mental CrossFit that I was putting myself through however, and my left leg buckled and I stared to topple over.

Oh...I guess I'll die then.

I was saved from the incoming deathblow when a thestral guard caught my fall in a very Luna-Like manner, catching me with her side, and using her left wing to wrap around my other side to stop me from sliding over another direction. The other Pegasi on the right gripped my bandages on my right arm with his teeth to try and stabilize me. The rest of the guard squad stopped immediately in their tracks to form a wall both in front and behind me, Half of them facing away and scanning for any possible threats. The other half looking toward my direction to keep an eye on me. One thing that noticed was that whether it be with magic, their teeth, or their hooves, they were prepared to draw the gladius on their sides.

"Careful there, Speedy," Grunted the female bat pony in a playful tone, "If you go too fast, you might end up needing more bandages, and I doubt your mare-friend would like that." Mare-friend?!? As I slowly pushed myself off her back with my free hand, she started to push herself up a little farther to help me, while the Pegasus on the other side started to pull me up too. "Uuuuuup we go!" exclaimed the thestral as I stood up straight. After she seemed sure that I was stable, she motioned with her hooves and we all kept walking toward the double-doors.

"You doing alright, Romeo?" The thestral asked. The bat pony then turned to look at me with a half smile and deep scarlet eyes that I recognized from yesterday.

"Oh hey, you're that chick from yesterday." I thought out loud. There was no mistaking it. She had the same dark azure hair with red highlights peeking from the tips of her hair near the bottom of her helmet, and her piercing Scarlet eyes that seemed to be staring into my soul. "God, I know your name, it's on the tip of my tongue...uuuuuh Ruby?" I guessed.

"I didn't tell you my name." she said with a smug smile "...And I'm not a "chick". I ain't got a beak or back-half of a lion for a behind."

"...Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? What's sooooo crazy!" I guffawed, looking away as I felt heat rise to my cheeks. Feeling stabilized thanks to the help of the royal guards on my sides, I decided to break away from the topics. "Well I think that we spent too much time dilly-dallying, so think its just about time to get a move on." I started to walk forward to the dreaded double-doors in front of me, as did the other guards seeing as I started moving again. All except for the still unnamed thestral guard.

"Nope, bump the breaks," She stated as she raised her hoof, causing all the other guards to stop and stand at attention. She then trotted in front of me, then "about-faced" toward my direction. "You still didn't answer my question." She declared, her eyes and head trailing up and down as if she was sizing me up, sniffing the air around me as she does. "You don't look so hot, Romeo. Your face is flushed and you've been sweating cold this entire walk." With one eyebrow raised in playful suspicion, she started her Sherlock impersonation again. "You doin' alright, hun? You aren't nervous over a tea party with the Princesses, are you? We can go back and take a nap together if it'll make you feel better?" She teased with concern hidden in her teasing.

...

.......

That's where I was going?!?!?

The Pegasus Solar Guard that helped me up sighed in annoyance, and shook his head.

"Need I remind you that that everything is strictly need-to-know, and that we were told not to tell the treasured guest where he was going?" He cautioned, moving his eyebrows in a way that just screamed Take a Hint.

"Oh come on, it's not like our treasured guest wouldn't find out in the next two minutes anyway." She defended. While she did her best try and justify that slip, I could not get over her word choice. "Treasured" is not the choice of word I would have used.

I know that I should try to keep myself grounded and remind myself that this is a real world, with real people and real situations, but I keep thinking back to the stories and fanfictions I have read before. Typically in these stories, whether it is adventure, action, horror, or slice of life, there is something called a Rising action. Usually its connected to relevant incidents that create suspense, interest, and tension in a narrative. If I was to go by that logic, that would mean that the Glass cage I found myself in earlier is connected to the meeting I'm about to have with the Princesses. I doubt they put that there just because it goes so well with the decor, so if it is for some negative reason, I can't help but get even more frightened then I already was. It's not like I could just book it out of here very easily either with all these bandages surrounding my body.

I was suddenly broken out of my thoughts by a voice addressing me.

"...Ah shit, you are spooked..." The female guard said as her smug smile slowly started to fade as her eyes met mine. She looked deep into my eyes, and for a moment I could almost sense a sort of protective aura from her. "Hey~..." she said as she pointed her hoof downwards. I only looked confused as she then pointed at me, then pointed down. I took this as an invitation to get closer to her own eye level, so I leaned down as far as I could without getting nauseous or off-balance. She then put her hoof on my chin and tilted it to make sure that I was looking right at her scarlet orbs, and spoke.

"Relax," she reassured, a smile starting to sprout again. "You're going to be in a room with two of the nicest ponies in Equestria. At least, they're way nicer than I am. If this was a trial, you wouldn't have been sleeping in a better room than us. Myself and my Centurii are stuck in barracks and tents while you got a nice, secure, and snug bedroom in Princess Twilight's castle. Canterlot snobs wish they could have gotten a room with your view." Adopting the smug smile from before, she took her hoof out from under my chin and then proceeded to ruffle my hair with it. "So don't sweat it, nothing bad is going to happen. I promise."

Almost like she practiced this speech in her head, she closed both her eyes, tilted her head slightly, and gave a big toothy grin, of which her fangs that were about a half-inch poked out.

I really wanted to still be worried after that. after all, I didn't want to let my guard down depending on what might happen, considering I'm two for two on "[iDays that I could have died on]". But there was something about the way she said it. How she was so confident that I couldn't help but feel myself ease up quite a bit.

If this was gonna get Game of Throne-sy, it would have happened by now, right? I just gotta go in with a cool head, and show that I am the smart, heroic, and still approachable person they think I am...

Oͫ̎r̝͍̳̹̭͚̄̌ͬ̐́ .̶͕̼̼̎ͥ͐ͭ̃͒.̩̞͇̹̇ͤ̊.̨͎̪ͦ̇ͬ̅̓t̖̿ͨ̂h͎̘̟̜͖̙̮ͥę͉ͪ̌͛ͦ̓͊m̵̝̜.̴̞͓͔̓͋̉.̢̪̰̲̑̋͐̂ͯ̓.̷̌ͥ̈̍.͓͕̬͈̑ͧ ̖̺̜̻͉͕͍͊̂ṯ̱̪͈̲̺͈̌ͦ̊ȓ͓͙̭̣͇̈̕u̳͇͎͓̬͓̱ͭ̉t͗̐̏̚h̬̪̭͚͛.̧̪̞̂̆͊̏͐ͥ.̦͍̓̽͜.̮̮̖̖̥̥̫ͧ̒͋̆ͨ̐

"...What?" I asked out-loud, prompting the unicorn that was standing off to the side of me to speak up.

"Do not worry, Edgar." He spoke in a very business-like tone "I was just asking if I needed to remind our commanding officer that the Princesses are expecting us at any moment?"

"Do I remind you to suck my dick, Flash?" The thestral chick who's name yet alludes me chides back.

"You don't have a dick." another Pegasi of to the side of me noted.

"I do. In fact, I'm stuck foal-sitting an entire squad is full of dicks and assholes who keep trying to tell their acting officer what to do." She grunted with mild annoyance and a commanding tone. "You're all stiffs. Honestly, can't wait to get back my Centurii.

Damn...

"Anyway, if you're feeling up to it, we can head on over now. You're practically already there." The thestral encouraged.

Well, there is no time like the present.

She walked up to the double doors and opened it enough for her to be visible to the ponies inside.

"Your majesties, our Treasured Guest is here." She said, giving a polite bow toward the ponies inside. I soon heard Luna's voice call out.

"We thank thee for thy service, First Centurion. Please send Edgar in posthaste."

The bat pony look my direction, and nodded me toward the room with a smile. I took this as sign that I should start walking in.

"Thanks." I said as I start to walk forward.

"No worries. Good luck in there" the bat pony waved me off. As I was about to enter the doors, I heard her speak once more. "By the way...it's Scarlett."

"I'm sorry?"

"My name. Scarlett." She finally revealed as she started to sashay away, letting her hips move in a way that does not seem to have any decorum you would expect from a royal guard, her tail flicking left and right. Before leaving for good, I see a cool smile as she looks back my direction. A few other Lunar guards followed her in suit, while the rest of the solar guards started to take up posts a small distance away from the double doors I was standing in front of. "See you around, Romeo."

Do they have even have Shakespeare here? Also, why do I feel so lightheaded all of a sudden?

I passed through the double doors to take in my surroundings. This room gave off the impression of a sort of parlor, with the intention of entertaining guests or foreign dignitaries. Sitting in the middle of the room were two couches, each facing each other. In between the two was an ornate coffee table, with some fancy tea and tea accessories to go along with it. On the much larger, chalice silver colored couch sat two Alicorns. One of a pure white coat and prismatic mane, the other darker coated one I already met. Regardless, I could recognize both in a heartbeat.

Celestia, in all her regal glory was sitting on a couch pouring herself some of what I assumed was tea in an adorably pink teacup while Luna had a white souvenir coffee mug of black liquid in a glowing magical aura, with the engraved with the words "No Maidens" with an close-up shot of the top part of her face below the text, looking as if it was pitying who was looking upon the picture. Something just seems surreal about that, any other day I feel that it would lighten the mood. Unfortunately, all that was on my mind was that God-awful music that nobody else can seem to hear playing in the background. Though, there as something wrong with this music. While I admit that for the first hearing it it sounds beautiful, it sounds almost...threatening. At least, the undertones were.

"Ah, so you must be the "infamous" Edgar I've been hearing so much about. Both Twilight and Luna have told me so much about you. Isn't that right, Luna?" She greeted with a warm and friendly smile.

"Hi." I greeted before giving a short bow of my head. I stayed in my spot for a moment or so, not quite sure what to do next. Celestia shook her head and used her hoof to wave me over.

"Oh don't be shy, come over here and take a seat." Celestia beckoned with a motherly smile that promised nothing but grace. "We don't bite."

Being careful not to trip in front of Celestia of all ponies, I waddled my self way over to the adjacent couch.

I noticed that although both the Alicorns looked at me with very attentively, they both had noticeable bags under their eyes. All the while the music started to getting more noticeable.

"Hey, do you guys hear that by any chance?" I asked, hoping that they heard the music. After the two alicorns looked at each other and seemed to strain their ears, they looked back at me.

"I am afraid I am not sure what you are talking about." Celestia told me. "Do you mean the castle staff roaming the halls or the guards that just dropped you off?"

"Eh, must be my imagination." I lied. I was about to answer her, but I decided against it. It will probably end up the same anyway. I would talk about the music, they would look at me like I was crazy, and we would move along like nothing happened until we do the exact same thing a little later.

"...Very well. Would you like some tea, perchance? It's a Goldenbrew maple blend." Celestia offered.

I don't even know what that means, but it sounds fancy. Therefore, it has to be delicious. I nodded, and Celestia poured me a cup and levitated it over to me. Just like when Trixie offered me wine a couple days ago, I quickly snatched it from her magical grasp.

"Heh, sorry. There's a story behind that."

Celestia looked confused for a moment before it hit her.

"Ahhh, that's right. Your magical "immunity"." Celestia clicked her tongue. Her horn started to glow, but after a few moments, it stopped. "Simply remarkable. I don't have any control of that tea cup anymore. That reminds me of why we summoned you here. I do hope you are finding you accommodations suitable."

"I could do less with the whole "SCP" thing you have going on right now, but it's nicer than any hotel I've been to. What's with that, anyway?" I asked her, taking a drink of the maple tea she offered. It tasted kinda like Black tea with an aftertaste of lemon and... sweet maple syrup? "Thaaaaat's weird." I said as I put the cup down. It's wasn't awful, per say. It's just a strange combination.

A strange combination that I wouldn't order if I had the choice.

Celestia chuckled at my reaction.

"You remind me of when I first tried it. The Goldenbrew Maple's leaves make for some of the most interesting flavors of tea. Right before Fall, it expels its unhealthy sap into its leaves as waste, infusing them with its nutrients. Coincidentally, the sap that's unhealthy for it is healthy for adult ponies, and it is really good for waking a pony up for the day." Celestia said, leaning in and giving an almost giddy whisper "... I didn't even have to add any sugar for it to taste as sweet as it does. It's all in the leaves, and its paleo if you are into that sort of thing!"

Luna gave a sigh as she pinched her nose.

"I don't see how you think anypony other than yourself would enjoy that abomination you call a beverage."

"Oh come on Luna, it will catch on eventually. Not to mention the vitamins and minerals in the leaves are essential to a growing mare's health."

"If you grow anymore, we'll have to build a bigger throne for you."

Shots fired!

"You don't need to be jealous Luna. I make this look good." She defended as she pointed at herself. To be fair, she was about as wide as I was, but she didn't look fat. "Besides, It's a gluten-free beverage that can keep you awake when you need it most. It is a superfood!"

"Coffee is the exact same thing." Luna deadpanned. "Only it tastes better. We hath told thee we should have just made more Prench roast."

"We?!? There was nothing stopping you from asking for more to be made. Besides, you always make the coffee is too strong and nigh undrinkable without adding enough sugar or cream to turn it into mud." Celestia said taking another sip of her tea and giving a hum of delight.

"I work for a living, Tia. If my coffee is too strong for you, you clearly never needed the energy boost. Besides, thou art one to speaketh of such things when thy tea is already undrinkable regardless of the copious condiments you infuse in it."

Celestia just deadpanned at Luna for a couple seconds as a magical aura surrounded her teapot, pouring herself another cup."...You're drinking bean water."

"Thou art drinking leaf juice!"

"♫~Bean wateeer~♫"

"Leaf juice!"

"♫~Beeean wateeer~♫"

"Leaf Juice!"

If this was anything like any of online comics or fanfiction that I've read, this would probably go on forever. I wouldn't have minded watching them bicker, and I probably would have thought it was hilarious if that ominous music wasn't going on in the background. At least it got me to focus on more serious matters, like "why was I was locked in a glass cage for a couple hours with little to no contact with anyone?"

"Umm, excuse me?" I interrupted with some regret. I was actually enjoying that. "I don't mean to be rude, but you said you needed me for something?"

"Hopefully not anytime soon." Celestia said a little too quickly before catching herself. "We summoned you here because we wanted to talk."

Trying to brush off the subtle attitude that seemingly came out of nowhere, I questioned her again.

"...You just wanted to talk?" I asked with a little confusion.

"Yes, just talk." Luna said.

"Ummmm, okaaay?" I said mildly awkward and confused. It's amazing really, because you'd think there would be a lot to talk about with the battles and the prisons and the fact that it shouldn't be possible for me to talk with them or anybody else in this place. Really, I at least want to bring up the recent changes to my room (mainly the glass box thing), but that would probably be a little forward if I was just to bring it up outright. I wouldn't want to overstep my bounds or anything, so I decided to play it safe and start with something easy. "So, how's the weather today."

I felt the ghost of Cringemas-past hovering over me, and I know that this was this cliché opener was the best I could come up, though neither princess seemed to mind.

"However we want it to be, but it is rather nice." Celestia mused. "How are you enjoying your time in Equestia? This is likely not the warmest reception that you could have received, but we are glad that you are okay."

"Well, I am a bit hungry. Actually, really hungry. I hadn't had breakfast yet."

Celestia frowned.

"Oh, I am sorry to hear that. We are working on distributing aid among the townsfolk until we get a proper handle on the situation, but I don't believe you were the top priority." Celestia then gave a reassuring smile. "This shouldn't take long, and once we are done, I can send orders to our custodians to bring you something." She took a sip of her tea, then poured herself another cup.

"Now, a little birdie told me that you were not from around here, and that you recently stumbled upon Equestria a couple of days ago..."

"Yeah," I answered, preparing to give most of the story of what has happened thus far in my own words. "I was driving home, listening to some tunes on the radio when suddenly everything went pitch black. Now it would have been strange even if it was nighttime, but I was driving home in the middle of the day. The road started to get bumpy, I kept hearing the cracks of branches as I was driving over them. I thought I had gone off road, so I flipped on my headlights and It was the weirdest thing I ever saw. I saw Trixie battling a d-"

"A dragon," Celestia finished for me. "Yes, we are well aware. Miss Lulamoon has great admiration for that feat, and she appears to be quite the fan of you".

"You spoke with Trixie?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. How much has been happening since I was asleep?

Celestia shook her head.

"I did not speak with her personally, but my sister spoke with her at great lengths in the early hours of the morning. How much do you know about her? Do you know what type of pony she is?" Celestia questioned with a tilted head, as if to gauge my reaction.

That is a weird transition, and I'm getting the feeling that something else going on here. Luckily, what Celestia doesn't know is that I have had a birds-eye view on My Little Pony since a few months after the show came out.

"Why yes, as a matter of fact. She is a traveling magician who helped me find my way here." I told her.

"And did she tell you why she was ran out of this town on numerous occasions?" Celestia interrogated. "...Did she even tell you she was ran out of this town at all, and that she avoided this town?"

"...Because she tried to enslave Ponyville?" I said slowly with an uneasy shrug.

ow, shouldn't have shrugged

Celestia's eyes widened in surprise, though I can't tell if this is her acting or if it was genuine.

"Really?!?" She questioned, eyebrows raised and a shocked face adorning her. "If it were a few hundred years ago, she would have been put to death for that, or worse, she could have been imprisoned in stone and buried somewhere that we could have easily forgotten the location of." She said, just casually dropping that as if she did not give that much thought. Resting her head on one of her hooves, she shook her head. "Thank the heavens nopony was seriously harmed, but she had the means and a motivation to do far worse. You know that she was responsible this and yet you still traveled with her? That is curious, and does not look good for you."

That's not fair! Back in the show, she was being corrupted by the Alicorn Amulet. She held a grudge, but she was not "all-there" that episode either. She sincerely had remorse at the end of the episode.

I almost spoke out to defend her with this fact, but I caught myself. At least I am getting better at that.

"Well she's not a bad pony. On the same night that she met me, Trixie gave me food, water, and a place to sleep. She's even helping me find a way back home. She just came here to apologize about everything she did." I defended, before doing a double take at what she just said. "Wait...what do you mean it doesn't look good for me? What do I have to do with it?"

"I mean, it all seems very strange..." Celestia started. "You were "ripped" from your home and coincidentally showed up during Trixie's life or death encounter. Then, you made your way here with the same mare that, up until recently, had bounties placed on her capture. It is then revealed that this same mare, who my dear student described as being mischievous and really good at conning other ponies into believing her tall tales, suddenly mended all her ways and lends her aid to a creature she had only met only the day before going to Ponyville. They then travel to the town to ask the aid of Princess Twilight, who this con-mare should have every reason to hate, simply to ask to return you home. Cui bono?"

"Ummmm" I ummed, still not sure what she is suggesting.

Cui bono? I think I heard that phrase from my history class before, but I can't for the life of me remember what it is supposed to mean.

"That is not even the half of it. Upon arriving, they find that in a bizarre set of coincidences they arrive the exact moment an attack is going on. The creature that was clearly outnumbered, yet not outmatched and managed to not only defeat the army AND a Changeling Queen, he does it with minimal injuries and, Luna correct me if I'm wrong," Celestia's horn started to glow, and from behind the couch two black splintered pieces of wood started to rise, with the handle being stained in dark green blood. "A wooden sword?"
...

"I'm almost done Edgar. I am recapping these events as they were explained, as I am still have a few questions lingering in the back of my mind...and I am not sure I would like the answers...this is your chance to prove me wrong."

Brows furrowed, Celestia's eyes narrowed as she leaned in.

"One...Why would Trixie risk bringing a creature as strong and fierce as you into Ponyville, to the same town that has humiliated her on multiple occasions? Two...if the changelings were not already attacking Ponyville, how do you think events would have played out if it was just the two of you in Ponyville. Three...Trixie offered to take you to Ponyville to get you home. A logical pony would assume this is some form of repayment for a sort of "life debt" that she might owe you for saving her from that Dragon, but I can't shake the feeling that she offered this because she would have something to gain from you. However, I can't fathom what it could be. It doesn't sound like she benefits from helping you in this situation."

Luna chimed in.

"Cui bono, Edgar? Did Trixie ask anything in exchange for your return home?" Luna asked in suspicion.

I am not the sharpest knife in the crayon box, but are they insinuating that I was brought here to do something terrible? I am just as lost as they are!

I was about to speak, but I was not even able to get a single sound out before I was interrupted by the prime interrogator in this conversation.

"Stop," Celestia interrupted, holding a hoof in front of her with her eyes closed. "Before you start answering these questions, you should know that we can not force you to tell the truth. While we have the power to invoke truth from those we have doubts about, it is based on magic and would not work on one such as you..." She then opened her eyes and stared into me, like a lioness contemplating her meal. " ...But my sister has used this magic on Miss Lulamoon last night."

This sentence caused my heart to sink, then slowly pick up the pace quicker than before. I can almost hear the beating right now. I glanced over at Luna, and she nodded with an neutral expression that I just could not decipher. The motherly vibe I got from watching episodes with Celestia and the adorable view I had of Luna were all gone in this moment, and I can't help but feel more threaten than when I encountered Telsona.

I haven't even done anything wrong. I am just sitting here, and I'm feeling like I am fighting for my life. All they are doing is staring and asking questions!

"We know beyond a shadow of a doubt that Trixie Lulamoon was telling us her truth, or what she believed with all her heart to be true, and if you are indeed telling the truth, we should hope to hear similar answers."

"Well...I mean... yea, it sounds really suspicious when you put it like that." I admitted...

Okay, you can do this. Just keep it short and simple.

"Alright. One? I don't know. Two? Twilight would get me in touch with you and Luna. And three...?" I paused while rattling off these answers.

Why has she gone out of her way to help me?

"...She said she was already planning on going to Ponyville to repair her reputation, but I don't think I have anything to do with that. That's her business."

That part is true, and I am rooting for Trixie, but that is mostly because I feel as if I known her for a long time the episodes I have watched and the stories I read. She has been going out of her way to help me, and we even worked together to get into the castle almost without knowing anything about me, apart from my time with her these past two days. When anyone else would probably run away from me or from Ponyville during this attack, she didn't. She showed that she was worried about me plenty of times, but that seems a bit out of character for someone she just met.

Celestia wore a neutral face just the same as Luna had, nodding as I was speaking.

"Okay, and how were you able to fight this "Queen Telsona" with a stick?" She asked, the tension easing in her voice.

"Its not as unlikely as you may think, sister. Against any armored opponent or anything with a thick shell like giant bugs or crabs, A bludgeon like clubs or maces are usually the best weapon to use." She explained. Celestia sighed as she shook her head. Almost as if to prove a point, she tilted it back and forth in Luna's face.

"Lulu, it's a stick, and not even made from a durable hickory at that." Celestia deadpanned. "It's not made for war, and it would have broke before he could any serious damage to a changeling's natural armor, let alone a Queen's chitin."

"Right, it wasn't. Which is why she got stabbed in the eye with the splintered piece." I said confidentially.

"That's not to mention that regular changeling Chitin isn't nearly as strong. If anypony gave a good strike to the temple or the sternum, they should go down relatively fast. It is not unheard of to use an improvised weapon if that is what it takes, isn't that right Edgar?" Luna said, looking at me like I knew both know what we were talking about.

"...Yeeah! Anybody with half a brain should know that!" I said, gaining Luna's approval. Celestia just stared at Luna in disbelief, before turning back to me.

"And what about everything before that? How did you go from encountering her to stabbing her eye out? You seem to be missing some steps, and how you can accomplish that task is beyond my imagination."

A blush crept to my face as I remember her pinning me down and...trying to seduce me.

"I am sorry, but it is a bit difficult to remember. Everything was a bit of a blur. High adrenaline and all that." I lied.

"Celestia, is the minutia really necessary? She is gone right now and Edgar survived." Luna remarked, seemingly trying to change the subject to something else.

"Luu-Naaaa~?" Celestial nagged. With Luna giving an affirmative nod, Celestia rolled her eyes and sighed. "Well, I know there are things you aren't telling us, but as I already said, we can't make you tell us." She tool a sip from her cup, and with the teapot surrounded in Celestia's magic, she refilled my cup with tea without me asking. "What about the Melody magic that you have been causing?"

"I'm sorry, the what?" I asked. I heard Trixie say something about that before, but I have no idea what they are talking a-

"Melody magic. You mean you haven't sang with ponies, danced, or heard any form of music come from seemingly out of nowhere? No instances of spontaneous musical numbers to be seen? Both Twilight and Luna were both corroborating this happening yesterday." Celestia questioned with raised eyebrows.

Hold on a second.

"Wait, you know about it? You can hear it too?" I asked, causing the other two heads in the room to turn immediately to me. "What about now? Can you hear the song playing right now?"

Celestia and Luna both looked confused for a moment before their ears started move, almost as if to the invisible violins in the background. Apparently they did hear it because soon their eyebrows raised in shock, Luna's lip giving the slightest quiver as both Alicorn's were half-slack-jawed in disbelief.

"How..."

I could have sworn I heard one of them murmur something, but it was much to quiet for me to hear. They soon looked to each other and enveloped themselves in their own magic auras for a couple seconds, soon having it fade. Soon after, I heard a magical chime around me, and for just a brief moment the room shined brighter for a split-second before dimming back to its original color.

"It's subtle, isn't it...? Yes, we can hear it now." Celestial admitted as she eyeballed me. "Before, we have been hearing it almost constantly as of recently. And it has come about much more recently ever since you've shown up."

"You don't think I'm doing it, are you? I mean I don't even know what the hell this "melody magic" is, but whatever it is I am not doing it."

"What, you expect us to believe that you don't even know you are causing this melody magic?" Celestia interrogated.

"It can't all be him, sister. After all, a tragedy did just happen very recently and our subjects are likely still distraught and emotional." Luna chimed in, almost as if she was playing Devil's advocate.

"I mean sure, I heard the music stuff plenty of times. I seemed to be the only one that heard it a lot of times, and some of it seemed familiar, but I'm not doing it!" I defended, getting a little antsy at her look. It was starting to become more agitated. "Uhhh, what did you just do?"

"That was a sound-proofing spell. Nothing can hear what is being said in this room." Celestia told me.

"Ummm...why?" I ask slowly, since this was starting to make me a little uneasy. It was reminding me of certain shows on HBO.

You know the ones.

"Honestly, it should have been the first thing we have done when you walked in. We don't want anypony getting caught up in whatever influence the melody magic might cause. Additionally, we feel it prudent to stop ponies from spying on our conversations all "Willy-filly". From what I heard, a guard was already spying on a conversation between my sister and you which should have stayed secret." She stirred in a sugar-cube as she into her tea. She then looked up and saw the obvious concern on my face. "Is there something wrong Edgar? You do seem tense."

I HAVE BEEN TENSE EVER SINCE I WALKED INTO THIS FUCKING ROOM! Its honestly starting to feel like that music was there for a good reason, but I can't be bothered to wrap my head around it because of all this pounding headache!

"I'm fine," I lied. Conveniently, my stomach rumbled right at that moment. "I'm...I'm just a little hungry!" I semi-truthed with what I am sure was a convincing light-hearted smile.

"That it? You're hungry?" Celestia asked with a raised eyebrow. I nodded my head energetically. "That's right, you mentioned that earlier."

"I haven't eaten anything since yesterday, and even then all I had was a can of peaches and half a banana." I told her, hoping to try and throw her off my scent.

"Well, that..."Celestia looked like she was gonna tell me to wait again, but then she raised an eyebrow and turned toward Luna. Luna's horn was glowing, and within a few moments Celestia's horn started to glow. Celestia shook her head and looked back with a soften expression? "...that certainly won't do. I wish that I took the care to make myself aware of how little you actually had to eat."

Celestia gracefully got up from her spot on the two Princess's couch, stretching her legs as it seems as if she had been there for quite a while.

"I'll take a short leave of absence to see if I can rustle up some food for us." Celestia looked to Luna then looked at me. "Behave you two... and remember Luna; no tonsil-hockey while I am gone..." after that, she teleported, leaving a flash of light and a slowly fading silhouette made of what looks like glitter.

D...Did she just?

"TIA!" Luna gasped in a flustered manner, a tinge of deep purplish-red blush painting against her face as she embarrassingly glanced between me and the afterimage formally known as "Celestia". I doubt I was faring much better as I felt that tingly buzz you get in your face when you know your blushing. Honestly, it was a bit more refreshing than the unreadable expressions she had earlier, and is a bit of a godsend that I won't take for granted anytime soon.

Luna turned back to me, but when our eyes met we both looked away just as quickly, leaving an air of awkward silence. In the ensuing silence, I was trying to figure out what I was going to say. I couldn't think for anything to say however, so I just resigned to the silence and started to admire the lovely chandelier that was dangling above us. Now that I think about it, I was kind of glad that it was quiet. It was a preferable alternative to Celestia's voice right now.

What the hell was that all about? That was not at all what I imagined Celestia would be like. She looked so much nicer on the show, so why was she being so... so damn bitchy to me? I haven't done anything to her, and I know that I certainly didn't deserve the treatment she was giving me right then and there. She had bitch resting face for most of the time we were talking. What did I do to deserve this interrogation?

*Ploof*

I felt a depression on the couch that I was sitting in, and when I turned I saw Princess Luna sitting right next to me. Well, more like I "looked up" to see Luna sitting next to me. If we were standing she probably would have came up to my chin, though if you counted her horn she was taller. Since we were both sitting down though, she probably towered over me by about half a foot. She was still trying to avoid my gaze like we were doing a little while ago, only this time her tail was flicking back and forth in an almost "tick-tock" rhythm. Eventually the silence was starting get to me, so I started to clear my throat but Luna beat me to it with a sigh.

"We apologize for our sister," Luna groaned as she shook her head whilst facepalming (facehoofing?). "She infuriates us sometimes. Taking any chance she can to embarrass us." Luna cleared her throat, obviously wanting to change the subject. "Edgar. We have been meaning to ask how thy bruises are mending. You seemed to be fairing well with the walking, true?" Luna asked.

Well, if you don't count the time walking here, yea. I'm feeling a bit better now.

"Yea, I think I'm doing alright, though I think I have a killer migraine. I'm still a little sore, but it's the type of sore that you get after going to the gym for a couple hours. I think I might be able to stretch pretty good if it wasn't for these bandages." I said, kind of hoping to get these bandages off of me since they were starting to feel a little constrictive.

"You are probably dehydrated. We are not fans of the tea our sister enjoys, but you must drink something. Would you prefer coffee, or water?"

"No, I'm fine. The tea really isn't that bad once you get used to it." I assured. I just gotta think of the maple syrup taste as a sweetener and pretend I smoked a bowl earlier.

"Very well. I pray thee, allowest me to inspect the dressing of thine injuries?" Luna asked, pointing a hoof at my bandages. I think she wanted to look at the bandages, so after a nod from me, I saw that Luna's horn started to glow for a split second before it faded again. She rolled her eyes and gave a sigh. "That shall take some getting used to." She remarked. She then shifted her body my direction. She leaned in and put two of her hooves on my shoulders to brace herself, and pressed her face against my chest, tilting her head so her horn was pointed safely to the side of my head. Upon touch, her hair went from doing an ethereal wave to just hanging off her head and onto the couch with a slight curl at the ends.

This felt weird.

"Uuuuuuh, Luna? What the heck are you doing?" No answer, though I did feel a couple short, hard scrapes on my bandage. "Luuuuuuna. Luna! You still haven't answered m-GAH, HEY!" I said, flinching as I felt a sharp pinch right under my nipple. Luna's head retreated as her face flushed with embarrassment. "Did you just bite me?!?"

"Our sincerest apologies Edgar, we... haven't used our teeth to grab things since we were but a foal." She justified. Carefully, she leaned in slower and successfully grabbed the tip of one of the bandages and shifted it upwards. "They are still noticeable. Because they are so recent, they will look worse before they look better. You do appear to be healing well, however."

"So I can take these off now?" I asked. My hopes were dashed when she grabbed the bandages again and scooted them up to their original spots.

"Kindness likely would not take too kindly to that. We feel that it may be best if they be kept for time being. Whilst I am not a doctor, we would be surprised if this took longer then two days, or even sooner to heal fully." She said, earning a groan from me. Luna took her hooves off of me and rested on the same couch as me, letting out a sigh. After a couple seconds she spoke again. "We're sorry..."

"Hey, it's not your fault that the changelings attacked yesterday," Or that Applejack is a bit of a cunt.

"It is not that, though we extend our apologies for you having to take part in that as well." Luna corrected, before giving a sigh." We... I never did apologize for what I called you earlier. When you said you didn't see a difference between us and Nightmare Moon, I assumed that you meant that in the worst way. And without thinking ahead, I let my anger and frustration get the best of me. I deemed you a "foreigner", and I know that it was most ignorant of us to do so. Could you find it in thy heart to forgive my transgression?" Luna asked, genuinely sad and concerned about what she was apologizing for.

"But I am a foreigner, so you have nothing to apologize." I told her, slightly confused at her apology.

Luna would have none of it.

"No, don't insult yourself to make me feel better." Luna said, shaking her head at me. "We're over a millennia old, and we should hope to be mature enough to understand when we have wronged somepony."

"But I'm not from around here, so I am foreign." I tried to explain, causing Luna to tilt her head in bewilderment.

"...Edgar, what does being a..." Luna paused, almost hesitant to speak again before she swallowed and started again. "What does being a "foreigner" mean to you?"

"It means you're not from around an area, or not native?" I asked, a little unsure of myself now. I knew what the word meant, dammit! But from the way Luna asked that question, it made me feel like I knew nothing. "Why?"

Luna's eyes widened for just split second in surprise before going back to normal, probably from hearing something she wasn't expecting. Her mouth soon formed into an "o" as she nodded at me in understanding.

"You have no idea what we meant when we called you a "foreigner", do you?" Luna asked rhetorically.

"What? But I just told you what it meant!"

"Yes, but that is the most basic form of the word." Luna told me, earning her a dumbfounded expression. Luna seemed to be in thought for a moment. "Oh, how could we explain this? Thou art taking it very literally, and it has different context when we have used it."

"Yeah?" I said, remembering giggling like a little girl when I first heard my friend call my dog a bitch. To be fair, I was twelve.

"A year after I first returned from banishment, I faced social stigma for a month in Canterlot when I accidentally made the son of noble bawl his eyes out at the Grand Galloping Gala." Luna admitted.

"Now how do you "accidentally" manage to do that?" I asked.

"He looked as if he was having a wondrous time, so I remarked upon his merriment. I told all the nobles how gay he was, and how it made me happy how one could be so gay in a place like Canterlot. Truly, he was the gayest stallion in all of Equestria."

"You spread rumors saying he was gay?" I asked, shocked that Luna would be so blunt.

"Back in my time, gay meant "Carefree" or "Joyous"! I didn't know it meant he was a colt-cuddler now." Luna said as she fidgeted in place. "Besides, they didn't turn out to be rumors, and we had brought them out of the broom closet much too early." Luna said much more quietly.

"Okay, but what's this have to with you calling me a foreigner?" I asked. Luna tapped her forehooves together, as if trying to find the best way to word what she was going to say.

"As you know, it's a word that's often used to describe if something is not from this land, but it's more...aggressive." Luna started to explain. "Instead of simply not having origin in Equestria, it is declaring that something just doesn't belong there. That they're not welcome. It is considered an ugly word and I had used it against you with very little hesitation."

"That is a lot to take out of one word." I commented, trying to wrap my head around this. "And why would a world like that have a meaning like that anyway? I thought this was Equestria, the "Land of Love and Tolerance"."

"You have to understand, nearly everything that that has came from outside Equestria's borders had brought destruction and misfortune unto our land." Luna said, seemingly glaring off into the distance. "Changelings, Tirek, Sirens. The list goes on and on of the terrors Equestria has had to deal with. Is it so hard to believe that us ponies would be so distrusting towards those that they are not familiar with?"

"Well, that explains your sister..."

Luna bowed her head in an apologetic way, before meeting eyes with me.

"Our kingdom has not made a single good impression on you since you had arrived, and it appears now that even we, the rulers, had dishonored you. I beseech thine forgiveness, and urge that thou mustn't judge our sister harshly. For millennia, her golden heart has weathered loneliness and shielded our subjects, and despite the pressures of ruling, she had kept it open for all her subjects. There are few whose hearts can compare, and it reveals itself to be both a blessing and a curse..."

With both of her hooves, she grasped my right hand. They felt smooth and hard, but the gentle pressure she applied made it seem protective.

"It is because she cares so much that she was so harsh in her manner of speaking. She is frightened of the safety of our subjects. We are all frightened right now as not long ago, she had made the mistake of not trusting her student during her niece's wedding, and the changelings almost cost us everything." Luna told me, expressing some form of anxiety. Her eyes seemed glassy, and though there no signs of a tremble in her voice, she gave off the impression of someone trying to keep it together. "Not one month ago, we barely managed to drive Tirek back into the abyss that is Tartarus. Yesterday morning, my sister almost lost this town, the ponies, and those special few that she held in the sacred recesses of her heart, and we would not have known until it was too late. The only reason that this hamlet isn't a graveyard is because of you, a foreign creature... and I shall treasure this gift that you have given us."

"Oh...you're welcome."

Oh god, tell me I'm not starting to tear up. I am a manly man who thinks manly things! I don't cry for anyone other than Hachi.

My fears were confirmed when Luna took one of her hooves and wiped away the not-tears that was forming near my eyes, a smile hint of a sweet smile peaking at the corners of her lips.

"You didn't have to do that," I sniffled. "I wasn't about to cry. It is just dusty in here."

"We shall ensure Princess Sparkle's maids are notified of this complaint". Luna shook her head as if to shake off some thoughts and change the subject. "I am sorry that thou had to hark upon our burdens. We suppose none of us hath been receiving much rest as of late. What of thou, Edgar? Doth thou hast any stories thou sayeth to us of thine homeland? We wish to hear of thine memories of merriment!"

I started to compose myself. "Well, my life was pretty boring until now. I really didn't have any interesting stories about my life that I could tell until a day or two ago...However, I do have a story I think you may like. Let me tell you all about The Dark Knight."

"The Dark Knight?" Her ears perked up.

"Yea! So it all started when this super rich kid's parents walk down..."

Author's Note

I think I am gonna start this story back up again. I hope it hasn't been too long or that the fandom hasn't died out.

BTW, Shout if I am missing anything or if I have any grammatical errors, or if anything simply does not make sense. I am getting back into the swing of things.