"YES! SWEET MERCIFUL JESUS THANK YOU!!!" I tried to scream but came out gargled because of the linen strip these equine jerks gagged me with. I'm happy as can be that this stranger, this minotaur is sticking his neck out for me.

"By the horn I know you mares get crazy when you go into estrus but this is bucking crazy." My savior known as Iron Will said to the crazy ponies. I swear if I wasn't tied up right now I would totally hug this guy, no homo. These armored ponies put me back onto the ground and begin to argue with Mr. Will. You know, for a magical land filled with colorful ponies the armored ones all look the same. Even so this was definitely my chance to make a get away.

Kicking my feet a bit, I was able to slip through the rope enough to were I could flatly lay on my stomach but not enough to have my hands or feet unbound. Crawling like a world war two soldier I make my escape away from these insane equines. Narrowly avoiding a few stomping hooves I managed to get to an ally way thankfully unnoticed, or I thought at first. Apparently the green unicorn pony saw the my pitiful escape and was now right in front of me. If this pony had alerted the others then I was so fucked, apparently it showed on my expression and the pony quickly responded.

"No no no it's ok, I'm a friend." The unicorn said in a soft soothing tone. Well at least I now know it's a her. As if to prove her point she removed the gag from my mouth, which was great because it tasted terrible. "See, isn't that much better? My name is Lyra. What is your name?" I've been here for about half an hour and I've been kidnapped, molested, chased and tied up like a calf at the Texas rodeo, so seeing a bit of normalcy from a pony is a bit stunning. Of course not answering the nice pony is probably not a good idea so I might as well give her what she wants.

"Smith, my name is Smith." The green unicorn that I now know as Lyra smiled at my response. She seemed to be really interested in me because she was looking all over my body, as if she was an Belgian diamond merchant appraising me like a jewel. Speaking of jewels, Lyra definitely was looking at mine a rather long time until I caught her staring. I'm not sure what to make of her just yet but I might as well test the waters as the saying goes. "Ehem, Lyra was it? If you are a friend as you say you are, then if you would be so kind as to untie me?"

"Of course Mr. Smith I would be happy too." Making good on her word she lit up her horn and the rope magically untangled itself from my naked form. Magic, who would have thought it right? Finally free from my restraints I stood to my full six foot height and straightened the bed sheet so now it covers my squishy bits.

"Thank you miss Lyra for your assistance." I say in earnest which makes Lyra turn deep crimson red in the face.

"You very welcome." Lyra says while fidgeting with her hoof and mane rather nervously. "Excuse me Mr. Smith, would you be my friend?" At first I thought of the cons of such a thing but when her facial expression began to darken with sadness and her lips quiver, I could not help but say yes. Apparently Lyra wanted to be my friend so bad that her mood just turned joyful happy in a heartbeat. She stomped her hooves with a huge smile on her face then jumped at me like a face hugger from aliens. We both collided and she hugged me so hard I could swear teddy bears would get jealous. "My very first human friend! I'm so happy!" Lyra exclaimed as I freed myself from her death grip. This sent up a few red flags because I never told her what I was.

"Lyra, how do you know that I'm a human?" I asked.

"Humans here are considered mythological creatures and we have books and stories about you all. Lyra finished with a calming smile. Well I just saw a minotaur and they are mythological creatures back home so I guess it would be the opposite for us in magic pony land. However it's still disconcerting that people, or I guess ponies in this case would think that I'm not a real creature and that just hurts my ego. I was brought out of my thoughts when I heard a someone yell out quite loudly.

"HEY! WHERE DID HE GO!!!"

Well that was my cue to leave because I didn't want to get captured by those fuckers again, bitches be crazy. I feel sorry for leaving Lyra behind but hopefully she wouldn't be mad about it and help them hunt me down out of spite. For about five minutes I dodged my way in and out of ally ways narrowly avoiding my pursuers with many close calls. Luckily I managed to get clear and started for the edge of town, or so I thought. I noticed a couch floating in mid air with some weird creature atop it with popcorn in one err claw and a soda in a drink holder. The creature itself was like a child pulled apart many different animal figurines and just slapped random pieces together. That was really freaky and I tried to pay it now mind but the bastard whistled really loudly, which got the attention of ponies, armored and unarmored. He pointed downward to me and then was on the run again from these guard clones. I could hear that freak laughing in the distance along with popcorn crunches, I swear if I get my hands on that fucker.

Anyway, I had to sprint towards the edge of town but ended up getting encircled by the clones on all sides. Surrounded and quickly loosing ground I was left with no other option but to use the most sacred and holy of battle cries. Steeling my nerves and pumping out my chest, I charge the clones with reckless abandon.

"LEEEEEEEERRROOOOOOOOYYYY JEEEEEEENNNNKKIIIIIIIIINNNNNSSS!!!!!!!!!!

Surprisingly I caught them all of guard, I guess the last thing they expected me to do was charge them head on. I managed to get clear of the first rank and file only to be tackled by the second right around the corner. Even though I'm taller than these ponies that doesn't mean they aren't heavier or stronger than me. These bastards were heavy and the armor didn't help either, luckily before the they could tie me again another form charged my aggressors, knocking them off me like a linebacker. It was Iron Will the minotaur, he had come to my aid once again. This guy must have some serious honor to help out a random stranger like me but either way I'm grateful and I told him so.

Our escape was short lived as more clones closed in on us and a lot of them had wings or horns which made it extremely difficult for the both of us to get away. It wasn't long before he was tackled to the ground and when I turned to give him help, he waved me away while shouting at me. "Forget about me! Run brother! RUN!"

To this day I wish I could say that I escaped, that I got away, but I was dive bombed from above by the blue Pegasus which allowed the others to catch up and restrain me. I was then brought to the entrance of the tree castle where I saw both Lyra and Iron Will tied up just as I was. Iron Will I could understand why, because he helped me escape but Lyra, she didn't deserve this and I felt bad because of it.

It was not long before we were taken into the fortress of pseudo oak and individually placed into guest rooms with guards stationed at the doors and the windows magically sealed. I personally was expecting some dank, dark prison cell with dim lighting and an irate guard, but I guess I've seen to many movies. The room was nice and spacious with a king sized bed and even had a just as big bathroom. At this point I'm dirty, tired and smelly so I might as well take a shower or something before I'm sentenced for whatever crime I 'committed'.

The bathroom was a bit weird but functioned mostly the same. After a rather long warm shower I toweled off with towels much smaller than the ones I'm used too. Normally by this point I would put on some clothes but since I woke up without any it's kind of hard to. Throwing my hands up in frustration I leave the bathroom and make my way over to the bed and just flop atop it. I closed my eyes to get some sleep but the door to the hallway opened and a mare wearing a variant of the maid uniform walked in. Then with a neutral expression, she spoke these words to me.

"The Princess will see you now."

Author's Note

I couldn't sleep so here's another chapter for you all. I know I'm miles away from writing a decent story but with your help, it's a step in the right direction. Thank all of you for reading and responding.