Chapters Duba: Carrying a basket of mangoes. "So, why are we doing this?"
Spike: "Ever wonder why we only talk to ponies?"
Duba: "Well I've talked to gryphon's ,rocks, and zecora.
Spike: "What would you say if I were to tell you that there's a special type of species?"
Duba: "Are you talking about breezies? Because I stepped on one the other day."
Spike: "No bats."
Duba: "Like Fluttershy?"
Spike: "She's a vampire pony not a bat pony."
Duba: "That still doesn't explain the mangoes."
They both arrive at a single tree on a hill shined by the moonlight.
Spike: "Grab a mango peel it and move it around the air."
Duba: "Why?"
Spike: "Just do it."
Duba: Grabs a mango, sits down and peels it "Now what?"
Spike: "Wave it "
Duba: Waves the mango in the air. "Are you sure this is going to..." A wooshing sound is heard causing him to shake in fear. "S-Spike?"
Spike: Runs off leaving Duba paralyzed in fear
Jasmine: Talking into Dubas ear "Are you going to eat that?"
Duba: "N-no?"
Jasmine: Snatches it "Yay because I was pretty hungry." She opens her mouth revealing her fangs. She stuffs the mango into her mouth. "I didn't think a normal pony would be so courteous with fruit normally they toss them at us and run off." Wipes her mouth "Wanna hang out?"
Duba: "You're not going to suck my blood are you?"
Jasmine: "Why do you want me to?" Shows her fangs nearing Dubas neck.
Duba: Lets out a small whimper.
Jasmine: Pulls back "Hehe i'm only joking I only eat fruits ."
Duba: "Oh um okay great."
Jasmine: "I'm Jasmine by the way who are you?"
Duba: "I'm Duba, still funny I didn't think I would talk to a bat pony."
Jasmine: "Well you are now? So what were you doing waving around mangoes?"
Duba: "My friend Spike said that's how you're called out."
Jasmine: "Not necessarily if it's night time we usually just fly around the night sky. Me I was looking for food this tree is a mango tree it hasn't grown anything in ages but I check on it regularly seeing you with the mango in the air just made my stomach control my actions."
Duba: "So there's no dangerous bat ponies."
Jasmine: "Only if you take our fruit."
Duba: Smiles "Great" Looks around "So if you go around the night sky, why are you the only one here."
Jasmine: "I like this area more other bat ponies don't come here as much."
Nightwatch: Lands behind Duba "Hmm you look very delicious."
Duba: Turning around "Oh well you're more than welcome to the mangoes?"
Nightwatch: "I wasn't talking about the mangoes." She draws her fangs out.
Jasmine: "Nightwatch lay off this one is cool."
Nightwatch: "I'll say." gets hit by a rock
Heartbeat: "Nightwatch stop trying to drink ponies blood, this is why nopony likes us because they think were blood suckers now sit and eat a mango."
Nightwatch: "Whatever." Turns to Duba "Be sure you don't wander in the night when these two aren't around." She flies off
Jasmine: "Sorry about that."
Duba: "It's okay."
Heartbeat: "She can be a real jerk sometimes but she doesn't mean any harm." Grabs a mango and starts eating it.
Duba: "Well it was nice talking to you bats but I should really get going I have to find Spike" Picks up the rock Heartbeat used on Nightwatch. "And thank him for abandoning me."
Jasmine: "Okay bye" Waves farewell before flying off with Heartbeat following behind carrying the basket of mangoes.
Spike: "Whoa that was amazing you talked to them they weren't so scary after all."
Duba: "Nope..." Punches Spike with the rock "That's for ditching me."
Duba: "Dive bomb!!!" Duba crashes into Spike creating a huge explosion.
Vinyl Scratch: "Whoa, new record."
Spike: "I know right what would you score that?"
Vinyl Scratch: "About eight-ish"
Duba: "I feel funny." Trying to stand up but falls. "I can't walk on my two legs."
Vinyl Scratch: "You alright Duba?"
Spike: "I'm fine why do you ask?"
Vinyl Scratch: Realizing what's happening she burst out laughing. "No way, you two switched bodies when you crashed."
Spike: Inspecting himself. "Whoa, freaky."
Duba: "Wait so I'm Duba now? I can't be I need to help Rarity out later"
Spike: "I can do it."
Duba: "You're not me so don't you dare do it."
Spike: "Fine...you be me and help her I'll go about doing dragon stuff."
Duba: "Like?"
Spike: Opens his mouth and starts blowing. "Well starting with breathing fire. But i'll be back in a bit." He walks off.
Duba: "We need to fix this Vinyl."
Vinyl Scratch: "Hey I would kill to switch bodies you're on your own this time." She walks off.
Duba: "W-what? no."
Spike: Continues to blow. "Maybe I'm missing something to this fire breathing technique."
Fluttershy: Gently flies down. "Oh, Spike there you are I have been looking all over for you."
Spike: "Am I in trouble?"
Fluttershy: Oh on you're not I just wanted to pay you for feeding my animal critters I know a few of them weren't so kind towards you." She hands him a sapphire.
Spike: Just looks at it.
Fluttershy: "Oh..if it's not what you wanted I can switch it for another one."
Spike: "It's not that...what am I suppose to do with a sapphire?"
Fluttershy: "Don't dragons usually eat them."
Spike: Putting a finger in his mouth. "Won't they break my teeth?"
Fluttershy: "Of course not."
Spike: Takes it delicately. "Okay then thanks." Fluttershy smiles before taking off.
On the other side of Ponyville.
Duba: "I can't believe I'm stuck in this body."
Carrot Top: Quickly spots Duba passing by. "Hiii Duba, what are you doing today?"
Duba: "Oh I'm not Du....I mean I'm going to help Rarity."
Carrot Top: "Oh and is she paying you?"
Duba: "Nope voluntarily."
Carrot Top: Raises an eyebrow in concern. "You've never used big words before are you feeling alright?"
Duba: "I'm fine, but I should really get going." He runs off. "What just happened?" Finally reaching the boutique he enters the bell chimes.
Rarity: "Just a second, I'll be there shortly" She trots happily before stopping and gazing uncomfortably at Duba. "Oh..it's you..can I help you with something?"
Duba: "Nope I'm actually here to help you."
Rarity: "With what exactly?"
Duba: Thinking for a bit. "I'm filling in for Spike."
Rarity: "Is he alright?"
Duba: "More or less he's not himself right now that much I can say."
Rarity: "Oh, poor Spikey wikey I hope he gets better."
Duba: Happily sighs at hearing her say that.
Rarity: "Well okay then follow me." She leads him to a room that's in a wreck of clothes and fabric. "Alot of this fabric has gone to waste some of it good and some of it not I want you to pick the good from the bad, discard the bad in the trash, and what you think I can use again organize it in those cabinets alphabetically and by color did you catch all that?"
Duba: "Yes."
Rarity: She looks at him surprised. "Really? Well then it shouldn't be of an issue I'll check on you in 30 minutes hopefully you do a decent job." She leaves closing the door behind her.
Duba: "Okay time to make Rarity proud." He picks up a fabric only for it to slide off his hoof. "Oh right no fingers."
Spike: Poking at the sapphire. "Do I just bite it?"
Twilight Sparkle: "Spike there you are, I thought you were helping Rarity."
Spike: "Oh...I'm not."
Twilight Sparkle: "Oh that's splendid I need you to write a letter to the Princess" Hands him a scroll and pen.
Spike: Attempts to grab it but it falls to the ground he just stares at it.
Twilight Sparkle: "Are you okay Spike?"
Spike: "Yeah but um how do I grab things?"
Twilight Sparkle: "With your hands?....if you're not feeling well I can do it myself while you rest back at the castle."
Spike: "But I still need to know how to breathe fire."
Twilight Sparkle: Lifts the scroll and pen with her magic. "Just go back to the castle and rest I'll check on you when I finish my task for the day." She flies off.
Spike: Continues to blow attempting to breathe fire.
Back at the boutique.
Duba: Panting in exhaustion. "Finally I can see why she needs someone with fingers."
Rarity: Walks in "I'm assuming you didn't make a complete mess of things...oh"
Duba: "I'm sorry if it's not how you wanted it."
Rarity: "No no Duba darling this is perfect you really surprised me I was assuming you would do your usual nature of making a mess of things but this.." Inspects the bad cloth in a ball then walks over to the cabinets all in order.
Duba: "Thank you Rarity" He blushes.
Rarity: "Now how would you like me to repay you?"
Duba: His stomach growls. "A good gem would hit the spot."
Rarity: "Gem? you're not a dragon but you do have a random nature so who am I to judge." She hands him a emerald gem "I hope you can help again soon darling." She walks off.
Duba: His mouth waters as he bites into the emerald suddenly in a state of pain as he realizes he nearly shattered his teeth from how hard he bit into it. "I can't eat emeralds anymore? I gotta find Duba and get my body back." He runs only to be stopped from the front door with Rarity and Carrot Top.
Carrot Top: "Are you trying to take my coltfriend you fashion freak?"
Rarity: "Fashion freak?" Scoffs "Why I never he only offered his services I in no way was trying to take him from you."
Duba: "Um I'm just gonna go." He slowly heads for the exit.
Carrot Top: Sees him sweating. "You worked him like a dog didn't you and his teeth."
Rarity: "I had nothing to do with that."
Carrot Top: "You're such a liar." She tackles Rarity pulling on her mane.
Duba: Runs off.
Spike: At Vinyls house sitting on the couch. "So I have been trying to breathe fire with no luck."
Vinyl Scratch: "That sucks bro."
Duba: Entering the house. "I want my body back, I want my life back, also you're dating Carrot Top?"
Spike: "No..Why?"
Duba: "No reason...but how can we switch back to our old selfs?"
Vinyl Scratch: Gets up. "Do what caused it I'll ready the catapult." She heads out.
Moments later.
Duba: Nervously shaking. "And are you sure this will work?"
Vinyl Scratch: "I dunno"
Rarity: Approaching angrily with her mane messed up. "There you are next time you want to help make sure it's as far away as my boutique as possible." She pulls the lever launching him off.
Vinyl Scratch: "Well....that was unexpected."
Spike: Sitting down on a target still attempting to blow fire.
Twilight Sparkle: Walks up to him. "Spike I thought I told you to rest back at the castle."
Spike: "I can't."
Twilight Sparkle: "Well come on." Lifts him up with her magic. "I'm free for the day so I'll be sure to set up some remedies for whatever is wrong with you."
Spike: Flailing around. "I can't leave me alone."
Twilight Sparkle: "Spike what is the matter with you?"
Duba: "Twilight watch out!!!" He smashes into both Spike and Twilight creating another crater.
Stallion worker: Tosses his construction hat on the ground. "Oh come on!!"
The smoke slowly clears.
Vinyl Scratch: Approaching them. "Duba..Spike?"
Duba: "Yeah?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Are you back in your old body?"
Duba: Inspects himself. "Sure am."
Vinyl Scratch: "Neat-o what about.."
Spike: Screams. "What is going on why am I in Spikes body?"
Twilight Sparkle: "Oh come on Duba got his old body back and I'm stuck in Twilights."
Vinyl Scratch: "Only one way to fix this."
Duba: "Lets ready the cata.." Burps out a stream of fire.
Duba,Spike, and Vinyl walk into a bar looking around.
Spike: "Why are we here exactly?"
Duba: "Berry Punch invited us and I think we should take a break from our awesome ideas."
Spike: "You mean destructive?"
Duba: "Whatever you want to call it."
Vinyl Scratch: Looking around. "There she is." Approaches her. "There you are you drunk mare."
Berry Punch: "Piss off or i'll...Oh hey it's you the bug eyed DJ."
Vinyl Scratch: "Actually those are just my visors." Takes them off. "See."
Berry Punch: "That's a *hic* nice trick you got there. I got one too wanna see?"
Duba: "Sure" He smiles in anticipation.
Berry Punch: "One...two..." She vomits on Spike.
Spike: "Oh come on!!!"
Vinyl Scratch: "Go Berry."
Duba: "That was awesome."
Spike: "Oh man I smell like heavy cider."
Berry Punch: "That's what I was drinking hun."
Duba: Flies alongside her. "You are awesome."
Berry Punch: "*Hic* I know." Taps a bar stool. "Take a seat."
Duba: Quickly sits. "Vinyl were getting our drink on."
Vinyl Scratch: "Alright you joining us Spike?"
Spike: "I'm too young to drink."
Berry Punch: "Booo" She throws a cider bottle knocking him unconscious on impact.
Duba: "Okay then....Bartender one cider please."
3 drinks later.
Duba: "I feel dizzy."
Vinyl Scratch: "Stop spinning on the bar stool then."
Duba: "Oh right." Stops abruptly falling off the stool.
8 drinks later.
Berry Punch: "Sooo Duba do you have a marefriend?"
Duba: "What did you just call me?"
15 drinks later.
Vinyl Scratch: Passed out covered underneath a pile of cider bottles.
Duba: "I think Twilight wants to kill me. She hates me and and I think if I apologize she will zap me." He starts wheezing and laughing at the same time."
Berry Punch: "You sure are one heavy drinker."
30 Drinks later.
Duba: "Whoa everything is duplicating" Sliding back and forth unable to stay still.
Berry Punch: "That just means your drunk." Finishes her drink. "It also means you're incapable of judgment. So how about a kiss?"
Duba: "Like chocolate?"
Berry Punch: "No a kiss on the lips."
Duba: "Oh...okay." He leans forward releasing a huge stream of vomit at her then falls off the stool. "Oh dear I fell."
9:30 AM: Ponyville Plaza
Duba: Walking with Vinyl and Spike he steps on a wrapper. "Huh, what's this?" Picks it up.
Vinyl Scratch: "Looks like trash."
Duba: "On the floor, in my Ponyville I don't think so come on guys were going to solve this mystery to the mystery cave."
9:45 AM: Dark Cave
Vinyl Scratch: "Are you sure we have a mystery cave?"
Spike: "I can't even see."
Duba: "Is that you tickling me Spike?"
10:30 AM: Dubas House.
Duba: Putting on bandages. "So, for future references we don't have a cave but we must be detectives to solve this case of the wrapper on the floor. I will be the main detective, Vinyl can be my sidekick, and Spike you're my butler."
Spike: "Why am I a butler?"
Duba: "Because I already bought the outfit."
Spike: "That's a maid outfit."
Duba: "And?"
Spike: "I'm a boy I don't put on maid outfits."
Vinyl Scratch: "I'll hold him down."
Spike: "Get away from me!!"
Moments later.
Spike: "This is so embarrassing."
Duba: "And now with my detective hat on we investigate." Shining a light on the wrapper. "Tell me who threw you on the ground." Waits for the wrapper to respond. "The silent
type huh? I got ways to make you talk." Goes to the kitchen and comes back with a bag of sugar. "Last chance to talk." Slowly ripping the bag until it rips completely spilling the sugar on the floor. "See what you made me do."
Spike: "Why are we even interrogating the wrapper just examine it."
Duba: Picks up the wrapper. "Apple tart." Scratching his chin. "Our first clue."
Vinyl Scratch: "I think we know where to go."
Duba: "I think so too."
Spike: "To Applejack?"
Duba: "No sugarcube corner." Jumps on Spike knocking him to the ground. "Onwards faithful butler."
Spike: "Get off you're heavy."
11:05 AM: Sugarcube Corner
Duba: "Okay remember I do the talking Vinyl if things get too crazy I want you to take care of Lulu."
Vinyl Scratch: "I'll raise her to be the best DJ in Equestria."
Duba: "She's in good hoofs."
Spike: "Oh for petes sake were at sugarcube corner nothing bad happens here."
Cupcake: "Hello there Duba, Vinyl , and Spike? Why are you wearing a maid outfit?"
Spike: "I don't even know anymore."
Cupcake: "Well how can I help you three today?"
Duba: "Enough sweet talk no pun intended where's your husband?"
Cupcake: "He's in the back. I can fetch him if you want but is he in trouble?"
Duba: "He will be if he doesn't come soon."
Cupcake: "Ok okay no need to get worked up." She walks off.
11:10 AM: Still at Sugarcube Corner
Carrot Cake: "Hi there did you...Why is Spike wearing a maid outfit?"
Spike: "Why is that so important!?!?"
Duba: "We'll discuss that later want to explain this?" Shows him the wrapper.
Carrot Cake: "Well that's trash."
Duba: "Found on the ground, I don't take kindly to littering."
Vinyl Scratch: "It's true he broke off a ponies hoof for littering."
Carrot Cake: Nervously sweating. "Well I honestly don't know where that came from."
Duba: "Really?"
Carrot Cake: "Yes."
Duba: "Really, really?"
Carrot Cake: "Yes?"
Duba: "He didn't respond right that time you're lying, Vinyl hold him down."
Vinyl Scratch: "I can't, he's on the other side of the counter."
Duba: "Oh, you lucked out this time."
Carrot Cake: "Is that all you need?"
Duba: "I was hoping for a apple tart."
Carrot Cake: "Certainly." Pulling out a fresh apple tart from under the glass counter. "Here you go that'll be."
Duba: Sticking the apple tart in the wrapper. "It's a perfect fit." Glares at Carrot Cake.
Carrot Cake: "Okay I give up we recently began outsourcing our products since business has been slow in Ponyville the wrappers are from us but they could've come from other
places there I talked I just didn't want her to find out."
Pinkie Pie: "Let who find out?"
Carrot Cake: "No one in particular."
Duba: "Your story checks out, but where do you get your apples?"
Spike: "Seriously?"
Carrot Cake: "Well sweet apple acres everypony knows that's where all the apples are grown."
Duba: "Then we'll go there."
Pinkie Pie: "Wait Duba, I want to help your investigation on who threw the wrapper on the ground."
Duba: "How do you know about that?"
Pinkie Pie: "I was following along the story."
Duba: "What?"
Pinkie Pie: "Nothing, nevermind, just go solve this mystery."
Duba: "I will."
Carrot Cake: "And now who's going to pay for that apple tart?"
Duba: "Well it's still...What happened to the tart?"
Pinkie Pie: Smiling sheepishly. "Sorry I couldn't help myself."
Duba: "Well I guess it's only fair that. Run Vinyl." They run off leaving Spike to pay for the apple tart.
11:30 AM: Ponyville Plaza
Duba: "Spike should been here by now."
Spike: "I can't believe you ditched me."
Duba: "You should've ran with us."
Spike: "I can't run in this stupid maid outfit."
Duba: "Well you worked hard enough faithful butler you go rest while Vinyl and I go to sweet apple acres."
Spike: "Where is she anyways?"
Duba: "She went to fetch some important objects." Winks at Spike.
Spike: "Why did you wink at me?"
Duba: "It's code for objects were using to interrogate Applejack."
Spike: "I think I'll just stick around a little longer just to make sure you guys don't do anything too out of hand."
Duba: "Oh faithful butler I knew you wouldn't leave us."
12:00 PM: Sweet Apple Acres.
Duba: "Did you bring the stuff?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Definitely it's all in this duffle bag."
Spike: Looking around nervously.
Duba: "First we check the brains of this operation."
12:05 PM: Apple family house.
Granny Smith: "It's not often, young folks visit me. They're all too busy with task like jobs. I think they slack off to parties, reading books, and being animal tamers no pony bothers visiting their elders every so often so what was is the reason you dropped by?"
Duba: "We wanted to know where you get your apples?"
Granny Smith: "Well from the trees of course, but it wasn't like that before back in my youth oh this whole land was just a giant field of nothing. It wasn't until my great, great, great, great, great."
Duba: "Spike you stay here."
Spike: "I am not staying listening to this boring history lesson on apples."
Duba: "You're the butler you can't say no."
Spike: Grumbles seeing Duba and Vinyl leave.
12:10 PM: Cutiemark Crusader Tree house.
Duba: "No one's here."
12:11 PM: Outside the Cutiemark Crusader Tree house
Applejack: "What are ya'll doing up there?"
Duba: Flies down. "Interrogation."
Applejack: "Interrogation what kind of nonsense are ya spitting out?"
Duba: "Well we learned from Sugarcube Corner they get their apples from you."
Applejack: "Of course they do every pony does it's our main source of income."
Duba: "Oh yeah I forgot you guys sell apples for a living."
Applejack: Only looking at him expressionless.
Duba: "Well I guess we're back to looking for clues."
3:00 PM: Flower Shop
Duba: "Well were at a dead end."
Vinyl Scratch: "I know we can find out who did it but we need more clues."
Spike: Approaching them with an angry look on his face. "Next time you're putting up with her story.
Duba: "Oh faithful butler we almost forgot about you." Thinking for a bit. "Let's go to Twilights."
3:30 PM: Twilights Castle
Duba: Knocks on the castle door.
Twilight Sparkle: Opening the door. "Yes? oh it's you what do you want?"
Duba: "I need help."
Twilight Sparkle: "Clearly."
Duba: "No hear me out. Somepony threw a apple tart wrapper on the ground after much investigating we only found out Sugarcube Corner sells them outsourcing because of slow business they didn't want someone in particular to know, next was Applejack who just told us she sells apples to everyone."
Twilight Sparkle: "You're not a very good investigator are you? but since you came to me for help you can always ask the cakes for the records on the ponies that recently bought apple tarts...Why are you in a maid outfit Spike?"
Spike: "Is that all everyone's going to keep asking me?!?!"
Duba: "I guess we can try that out come on Vinyl, Spike." He heads out the door with the others following him.
3:45 PM: Sugarcube Corner
Duba: "Just remember the plan got it." Vinyl nods. He approaches the counter.
Cupcake: "Hey there Duba, my husband isn't here right now."
Duba: "Oh don't worry I didn't come for your husband."
Spike: Speaking into a microphone outside Sugarcube Corner telling Duba what to say.
Cupcake: "Well then what can I get you?"
Duba: "A cupcake sounds nice?"
Cupcake: "Which kind."
Duba: Feeling a bit uneasy before holding Cupcakes hoofs. "Whichever you prefer."
Cupcake: Blushing. "D-duba please this is really uncomfortable for me I'm a married mare."
Duba: "I know but...hold on." Sitting down distant from the front counter speaking into his earpiece. "I'm only the distraction why are you making me sound like Romeo?" Spike chatting into the earpiece. "Okay, fine." Walking back to the counter.
Cupcake: "So did you make up your."
Duba: Pulling Cupcake towards him kissing her on the lips he looks behind her seeing Vinyl dressed as a ninja waving papers around she exits through the window a loud crash is heard.
Cupcake: "What in Equestria has gotten into you? I told you I'm married."
Duba: "I know but it took you 2 minutes to break from the kiss. But I got what I needed so bye."
Cupcake: Looking at him confused blushing darkly.
Spike: Sees Duba exiting Sugarcube Corner. "Wow didn't think you."
Duba: Punches Spike sending him a few feet away. "You made me kiss somepony 20 years older than me. She tasted like expired sugar."
Spike: Gets up dusting himself off "How do you know what expired sugar taste like?"
Vinyl Scratch: Pulling her ninja mask down. "I got it by the way nice distraction but I think the kiss was a little too much."
Duba: "I know...Spike"
Vinyl Scratch: "No, I'm serious the business here has gotten so bad the cakes barely you know *Whistles*. If anything that little kiss could cause a break in their marriage."
Duba: "It's marriage you're stuck for life in those things."
Vinyl Scratch: "Hopefully an affair doesn't happen."
Duba: "Just read the list."
Vinyl Scratch: Looking down the list. "Well that narrows it down."
Duba: "What?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Only one pony has bought an apple tart in the past month."
Duba: "Who was it?"
5:00 PM: Ponyville Post Office.
Derpy Hooves: Leaving the post office taking off her postmare hat.
Duba: "Freeze, Derpy Hooves you're under arrest." Derpy raises her hoofs trembling in fear.
Vinyl Scratch: "Can detectives arrest someone?"
Duba: "I don't know, but Derpy we caught you redhanded you thought you were clever but we found you out."
Derpy Hooves: "I'm sorry for whatever I did, I didn't mean to harm anypony."
Duba: "Cuff her Spike"
Spike: "We don't have cuffs."
Duba: "Oh, we'll use this rope then." Ties Derpy making Spike carry her.
Heading to the police station Duba, Vinyl, and Spike walk while Derpy flies behind them from having her arms and legs tied up.
5:10 PM: Ponyville Police Station.
Duba: Entering the station. "Officers I have a pony you need to arrest for littering."
Police officer: "And who might that be?"
Duba: Unties Derpy. "Her"
Police Office: "Oh her, she's the klutz of Ponyville we usually give her a free pass on everything I mean who can stay mad at that face?"
Derpy Hooves: Smiling at the officer. "Thank you for understanding officer I just don't know what went wrong when the wrapper flew out of my hoof from the wind."
Police Officer: "Understandable."
Derpy Hooves: "it's just I do get a little tired of always eating muffins.."
Police Officer: "You get tired of eating muffins?!" Cuffing Derpy "You are under arrest for impersonating a pony."
Derpy Hooves: "Please officer I'm not impersonating anyone." The officer takes her for interrogation.
Duba: Dusting his hoofs. "Case closed and another happy ending."
Spike: "Happy ending? Derpy got arrested."
Vinyl Scratch: "Should we go to Sugarcube Corner to celebrate?"
Duba: "After kissing Cupcake no I think it will be awhile before I can go there."
Vinyl Scratch: "That's true."
Spike: "Can I take this outfit off?"
Duba: "Yeah I was wondering why you had it on."
Spike: "You forced me to put it on."
Duba: "Only to test how it would look on you. You could've taken it off after that."
Spike: "I hate you."
Princess Celestia: Reading a letter from Twilight "This is a such abnormal behavior coming from Twilight. Why in Equestria is she sending someone to Canterlot for me to banish to the moon? This pony Duba must be dangerous."
Guard # 1: Gulp "D-did you say Duba?" Gets on the ground begging "Please your highness reconsider this and send him back."
Princess Celestia: "Is he a threat?"
Guard #2: "Yes he will destroy this castle, leave you crippled and Equestria will be taken over."
Meanwhile
Twilight Sparkle: "And with a good amount of magic I will send you flying at full speed nearly destroying the Canterlot castle. Celestia will surely ban you."
Duba: Staring at his hoof "I wonder what fingers are like." Twilight sends him at mach speed heading to the castle.
Princess Luna: Peacefully sleeping in her bed, Duba smashes in through the window bouncing off the ground and crashing into the wall waking her up. "What? who goes there?"
Duba: "It's me..." Unsticks from the wall falling back.
Princess Luna: "Most interesting way to make an entrance speak your purpose."
Duba: "I'm here to get banished."
Princess Luna: "Why in Equestria would you request such a foul request?"
Duba: "Twilight said there'd be candy wherever I get banished to."
Princess Luna: Sigh "Well poor subject tis a lie, there's no candy of any sort, no sound, only having to hear your own thoughts for company, getting banished is lonely so very lonely." Duba trots up to her and hugs her "W-what? are you doing?"
Duba: "You were crying or going to. I thought you needed a hug."
Princess Luna: "You are most kind indeed, I do not see why Princess Sparkle wants you banished you have shown true kindness."
Duba: "Are we friends now?"
Princess Luna: Slowly nods happily
In the throne room.
Princess Celestia: "I have gathered all of you in search of this Duba." Showing a poster of him "He is highly dangerous from what I've been told by guards, approach with caution and use force if you have to. Bring him to me so I may know his true intentions."
Guard: "Your highness we spotted Duba with Princess Luna."
Princess Celestia: "Sister!!!" Her wings flap open "Where did they go?"
Guard: "They were headed to the garden."
Princess Celestia: "Probably a trap to drop her guard, Guards to the royal garden." She flies off with the guards following her by air and ground. Landing in the middle of the garden field she looks around inspecting the garden surroundings. "Sister...sister? where are you? Duba if you put her in harm's way."
Guard: "Your highness we caught them heading back into the castle."
Princess Celestia: "She can easily be lured into the dungeons." Her horn glows as she teleports to the dungeon cells aside from the usual convicts Luna and Duba aren't there. "Where in Equestria could they be?"
Meanwhile
Princess Luna: "Most humorous indeed this mint pony has a strong obsession with bipedal creatures?"
Duba: "Yep, she calls them hoomans."
Princess Luna: "I shall do research on these hoomans ."
Guard: Standing in front of them "Stop cretin you are under arrest, step away from the Princess and follow me to the dungeon."
Duba: "Mmkay bye Luna."
Princess Luna: "No, guard what is the meaning of this arresting an innocent pony of crimes he hasn't committed."
Duba: "I took a cookie from the royal kitchen when you weren't looking."
Princess Luna: "That's still not a felony of any sort, stand down guard." The guard looks away in shame and trots off. "I am so sorry Duba...Duba?"
Duba: Floating in mid-air with a magic aura around him "Over here I think I have to go somewhere." Celestia drops him on the ground.
Princess Celestia: "You are marked as a threat by the royal guards, as Princess I can't let you cause any danger."
Duba: "I just took a cookie I still have it if it's such a big deal to you guys."
Princess Luna: "Sister!!!" Steps in front of Duba. "You aren't banishing this pon..my friend."
Princess Celestia: "Luna, this pony is your friend?"
Princess Luna: "Yes thou seems surprise."
Princess Celestia: "Well I heard from the guards he was a threat worse than any villain we ever dealt with. After the incident with Tirek I didn't want to risk putting anyponys life at risk."
Duba: Sitting down eating the cookie.
Princess Luna: "He is of no threat, he has shown kindness the likes I have never experienced...." Stands up straight. "Sister I will take him as a student of mine."
Princess Celestia. "L-Luna."
Princess Luna: "You learned alot from your previous student who is now the Princess of Friendship, it is only fair I experience it as well."
Princess Celestia: Sigh "If that's what you request, you are a Princess after all you don't need my permission to make choices." She approaches Luna and hugs her "I know you will be raise a great student like I have." She breaks from the hug and trots off.
Princess Luna: "Did thou hear the splendid news? I shall be your new teacher...Err How doth one be a teacher?"
Duba: Shrugs.
Twilight Sparkle: "What nonono please Princess Celestia I'll write a million friendship letters just please don't make me do this."
Princess Celestia: "I have had enough of these complaints all towards you mistreating Duba in ways that go against your role as Princess of Friendship."
Twilight Sparkle: "But he's an idiot. I'm sorry Princess but he's just so quick on getting on my nerves."
Princess Celestia: "Really? and what about your little pink friend."
Twilight Sparkle: "Who Pinkie Pie? That's different we're friends."
Princess Celestia: "As you will be with Duba." Her horn glows as a magic chain is formed around Twilight and Dubas hooves.
Duba: "Wow, this castle is roomy." Unaware of the chains.
Princess Celestia: "Now go Princess Sparkle."
Twilight Sparkle: "I can't believe this well come on Duba." She walks off with him following behind they end up at the garden. "Now listen I don't want to do this but I have to. So
let's get some ground rules, no funny business that includes...well anything you do that involves destruction. Also keep your hoofs off my books and ugh i'm going to have to write a list for this, but did you catch the main rules?"
Duba: Poking at a dandelion.
Twilight Sparkle: "Duba!!!"
Duba: Jumps up in surprise. "Yeah?"
Twilight Sparkle: "Did you hear any of the words I told you?"
Duba: Shakes his head.
Twilight Sparkle: Facehoofs. "Why me?"
Princess Luna: "Ah my dear student Duba."
Duba: "Moonbutt!!!" She runs towards Luna dragging Twilight along with him. He jumps and hugs Luna.
Princess Luna: "Thou are quite affectionate it's very humorous." She notices Twilight on the floor. "Miss Sparkle why are thou on the ground?"
Twilight Sparkle: "Long story so you know Duba?"
Princess Luna: "Indeed did thou forget I made him my student?"
Twilight Sparkle: "I thought I was just having a bad dream."
Princess Luna: "Oh, it was no dream of yours now that I recall on that night you dreamt of Flash Sentry in a very mischievous way."
Twilight Sparkle: Blushes darkly. "Please don't go into details."
Princess Luna: "It was your dream but as Princess I always keep my fellow subjects dreams in privacy."
Twilight Sparkle: "So Luna..I need to ask how exactly can you handle being around Duba without you know losing your sanity?"
Princess Luna: "I don't follow what thou are saying?"
Twilight Sparkle: "Do you think Duba is annoying?"
Princess Luna: "No I don't he is very humorous to be around similar to your pink friend just without the party throwing."
Twilight Sparkle: "I see, I guess I will try to spend the day with him and maybe then I'll warm up to him." She looks at Duba who is now eating the same dandelion from earlier.
At Ponyville.
Twilight Sparkle: "Okay Duba to better understand you, I will have to see what your day is normally like so go along with your normal every day schedule."
Duba: "Okay..." He walks a few feet before turning around. "Can you not follow me it's weird."
Twilight Sparkle: "Were chained up you id....I mean I just want to hang out with you that's all." She smiles.
Duba: "Oh okay then.." He heads off to Vinyls house.
Rarity: "Twilight there you are." She runs up to them. "Oh..hello there Duba" She nervously backs away a safe distance from him."
Twilight Sparkle: "Are you okay Rarity."
Rarity: "Yes except for the fact that he bit my rump thinking I was a marshmallow."
Duba: "I said I was sorry Vinyl told me you were made of one but you tasted like bad shampoo."
Rarity: Slaps Duba. "Why I never those were very expensive and imported shampoos. But that's for another time Twilight I finally have your dress ready pick it up when you have
the time."
Twilight Sparkle: "Okay I will."
Rarity: "Why are you chained up?"
Twilight Sparkle: "Long story well I gotta go." She pulls on the chain signaling Duba to continue on his path.
Duba: Finally reaching the house he knocks.
Octavia: Peeks through the peep hole before opening the door. "She's not he..."
Duba: Burst inside knocking Octavia down. "Vinyl are you here?"
Octavia: "Why do I even bother?" She gets up and notices Twilight. "Oh, Princess I didn't know you would bless me with your presence I'm ever so sorry for my rude behavior if I had know..
Twilight Sparkle: "It's fine" Pulls on the chain tripping Duba. "Have some manners you're a guest."
Octavia: "It's alright he just comes for Vinyl and leaves."
Twilight Sparkle: "That's still not an excuse to be rude."
Vinyl Scratch: "Yo Duba sorry I couldn't hear I was testing out my new headphones and man those wubs replace sound."
Duba: "I didn't hear anything."
Vinyl Scratch: "Because only I can hear them well come on let's get Spike." She trots off with Duba following but is stopped by the chain he pulls on it knocking Twilight back.
Twilight Sparkle: "I swear I won't forget this one." Gets up "Well I have to go Octavia it was nice talking to you."
Vinyl Scratch: "So why is Twilight following you?"
Duba: "I don't know she's been really creepy lately."
Twilight Sparkle: "Hello? chained up."
Duba: "There's Spike." He runs to him dragging Twilight
Rarity: "Thank you so much for the help Spikey wikey."
Spike: "It was my pleasure R-rarity" he happily sighs
Duba: "Hey Spike were going to the park wanna come?"
Spike: "Well seeing how I just finished helping Rarity sure...Twilight why are you here?"
Duba: "She's being creepy."
Twilight Sparkle: "Were chained up you idiot." The chains glow as they shorten causing them to slightly shrink. "Did the chains just get shorter?"
Duba: "Told you weirdo."
Spike: "Right? so okay to the park."
Vinyl Scratch: "Last one there buys lunch." She runs off along with Spike and Duba dragging Twilight. They finally reach the park "Ha Duba you buy lunch."
Duba: "No I don't Twilight was the last one."
Vinyl Scratch: "Then Twilight buys lunch."
Twilight Sparkle: "Please just end this already."
Spike: "So why are we at the park?"
Duba: "Well it's nice here right?"
Spike: "But why here?"
Duba: "Well Twilight needs to be somewhere calm she's so uptight lately."
Twilight Sparkle: Looks in surprise. "You took me here to relax? That's um kind of you Duba." Not noticing the chain slightly extended.
Vinyl Scratch: "Okay so what are we going to do here."
Duba: "Easy." Falls on his back. "We look at clouds."
Twilight Sparkle: Sits down. "That sounds fun."
Spike: "Duba you're starting to become boring."
Duba: "You're boring." Slaps Spike with his wing.
A few hours later.
Duba: "Okay time for lunch my stomach is killing me."
Twilight Sparkle: "Sounds great what did you have in mind?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Yeah where?"
Duba: "To the club they're food is awesome." His mouth waters. "Nachos."
Twilight Sparkle: "Oh the club....ugh."
Duba: "If you don't want to go there we can choose somewhere else."
Twilight Sparkle: "No it's fine."
Duba: "Let's try the bar."
Moments later they reach the bar and enter.
Berry Punch: "Heyy if it isn't my favorite drinking buddies and the purple thingy?"
Duba: "Oh this is Twilight Princess of craftsmanship."
Twilight Sparkle: "It's actually friendship."
Duba: "Right."
Berry Punch: "What brings you here?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Honestly we don't even know listen Duba were going with our flour bombs when this little date is over meet us at Fluttershy's cottage."
Twilight Sparkle: "Why there?"
Vinyl Scratch: "It's far away, and she agreed."
Duba: "So okay time to drink."
Twilight Sparkle: "Sorry I don't drink."
Berry Punch: "Relax this stuff is not alcoholic."
Twilight Sparkle: "Well then there's no harm." She picks up the mug. "To friendship kinda."
Duba and berry lift up their mugs and drink.
Moments later
Twilight Sparkle: Feeling woozy. "Berry you told me there wasn't any alcohol in this drink."
Berry Punch: Chuckles. "Why would you believe me..I'm drunk."
Twilight Sparkle: "*Hic* I'm getting you both for this." She falls over and passes out.
Duba: "One more drink?"
Berry Punch: "You know it."
Twilight wakes up a few hours later. "Oh my aching head. Duba you..Duba?" She notices Dubas gone along with Berry. "I'm free? Oh thank you sweet Celestia I'm what the?" Notices she's chained to the bar stool.
Bartender: "Hey this is for you." Hands her a note.
Twilight Sparkle: "Left with Berry to make bombs with Vinyl and Spike be back soon." She gets infuriated. "He left me chained to a bar stool that idiot." The chain shortens. "I will personally tear him limb from limb I will make him suffer beyond" The chain instantly shrinks down forcefully dragging Twilight to the bar stool. She hits her head on it knocking her unconscious."
Duba: Riding in a train. "Bye bye Ponyville." He goes to find a seat and sits down next to a pony in a purple suit. "Hi I'm Duba." He extends his hoof.
Ms.Harshwhinny : Ignores Duba.
Duba: Pushes his hoof more at her. "I'm Duba."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "Get your filthy hoof away from me."
Duba: "It's not filthy, I just walk on it oh then it is filthy wait so is yours."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "If I shake your hoof will you leave?"
Duba: Happily nods.
Ms.Harshwhinny: Shakes Dubas hoof. "There now leave."
Duba: "Yay, I can't wait to tell Luna I made a sorta friend."
Ms.Harshwhinny: She looks at him with interest "Luna as in the Princess Luna."
Duba: "Yup I call her moonbutt she thinks it's funny."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "I see and how do you know Luna."
Duba: "Twilight launched me into her room."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "You know Princess Sparkle as well?"
Duba: Nods.
Ms.Harshwhinny: "And where are you headed now?"
Duba: "Crystal Empire Luna wanted me to give this note to." Pulls out a note. "Ca...den...se"
Ms.Harshwhinny: "Princess Cadence how in Equestria do you know all these princesses?"
Duba: "Twilight I've known sorta she doesn't like me being around her..Luna is my teacher in friendship though we usually make prank calls and play games. Princess Celestia um I just tell her something involving friendship I make something up but she thinks it's better to learn something unlike Applejack not sure what that means...and cadense I will meet today to hand her the note."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "You must be pretty extraordinary to be able to meet so much royalty especially having one as your teacher. Also it's pronounced Cadence."
Duba: "Okay cadents."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "Close enough well good luck on your task Mr.Duba was it?"
Duba: "Yes but my names not mister Duba it's just Duba."
Ms.Harshwhinny: "I'll remember that." The train stops. "I guess this is your destination may we meet again.
Duba: "Definitely." Gets off the train and looks at the Crystal Empire. "Wow, Spike would eat this place up." A mare passes by Duba pokes her.
Mare: "Eep perv." Slaps Duba.
Duba: "I wanted to see if you were made of crystal so I can make sure a dragon doesn't eat you."
Mare: Scoffs then leaves.
Duba: "Eesh the ponies here are so hard headed." Rubbing his cheek he pulls out a note and tugs on a stallions mane. "Excuse me do you know cadance?"
Stallion: "Who?"
Duba: "You know Princess Cadents?"
Stallion: "Princess Cadence? Why yes she lives in the very tall crystal castle smart guy." He leaves with a tempered look on his face.
Duba: "I really hope the Princess here isn't as cruel as these ponies." He heads to the castle only to be blocked by the guards.
Guard: "Halt speak your purpose."
Duba: "I have a note from Luna and I have to give it to the Princess that's name starts with a C" The guards look at each other before stepping aside. He heads inside the castle. "Normally Princesses are in the throne room." Heads to the throne room and sees her sitting down. "*Squee* I was right." Rushes at her the guards nearby tackle him down.
Guard: "You shall not go another step."
Duba: "I can't with you guys on top of me."
Princess Cadence: "That's quite alright guards he doesn't look like a danger to anyone." Approaches him. "Can I help you with something?"
Duba: "Actually I'm just here to deliver this note from Luna." He shows her the note waving it around.
Princess Cadence. Taking the note and reading it. "I'm sending my student." Turning the note over. "That's it? What student?"
Duba: "She must mean me."
Princess Cadence: "You are Lunas student? Well that's a surprise normally Celestia is the only one capable of taking ponies under royal wing you must've been an exception."
Shining Armor: "Hey what's with the noise earlier? it sounded like an earthquake."
Duba: Gasp "Hey it's you captain of the royal guards I think."
Shining Armor: "Why yes I am I didn't know my title would be so famous outside the Crystal Empire."
Duba: "You're the one that was bawling like a foal when Twilight became Princess."
Shining Armor: "That was liquid pride."
Duba: "You mean like." Whispers into Shinings ear.
Shining Armor: Chuckles. "We gotta hang out sometime."
Princess Cadence: "I am not going to interfere in whatever you two just discussed but you know Twilight?"
Duba: "Yep she's my sorta distance get away from me friend."
Princess Cadence: "What?"
Duba: "She doesn't like me being around her but being princess of friendship maybe she's just shy."
Princess Cadence: Looks at Duba who is looking back at her smiling. "That doesn't seem like Twilight to push ponies away." She writes on a scroll.
Shining Armor: "So what's your name anyways?"
Duba: "Duba."
Shining Armor: "Nice meeting you Duba" Scratching his head. "I really hate to leave you hanging but I have to get back to my post whenever I'm free and you are as well just message me in some way."
Duba: "Will do...crybaby."
Shining Armor: Playfully scoffs. "It was liquid pride." He trots off.
Princess Cadence: "Here you go deliver this to Twilight." Duba grabs the note. "Okay is there anything else I can help you with?"
Duba: "Well I was wondering if dragons can eat the ponies here."
Princess Cadence: "Hm? I always wondered the same thing. I'm afraid I can't answer that question for you at the moment."
Duba: "I'll ask Twilight she's smart." Waving bye leaving the Crystal Empire and waiting at the train station. "That wasn't so hard." The train finally arrives he gets inside heading back to Ponyville once arriving he heads to Twilights castle and knocks on the door. "Twilight...Twilight...Twilight!!!"
Twilight Sparkle: Opening the door. "What do you want?"
Duba: "Are we friends?"
Twilight Sparkle: "No" Closes the door only for Duba to knock again. "What now?"
Duba: "Do you hate me?"
Twilight Sparkle: "I don't it's complicated to explain why are you asking me these questions anyways."
Duba: Nervously scratching his back. "I read the letter that was meant for you."
Twilight Sparkle: "Letter?"
Duba: "Uh-huh Luna sent me to the Crystal Empire to talk to Cadence....Hey I got it right."
Twilight Sparkle: "You went to the Crystal Empire and talked to Cadence? The security there must be terrible. But let's not go off topic what did she say?"
Duba: "Not much I told her about you then she was writing and I was mostly talking to your brother." Hands her the letter.
Twilight Sparkle: Reads the letter. "I am really disappointed in you, you should take this role as Princess of Friendship seriously. It's not some title given with no meaning, there's a lot to it and you should know from the experiences you had I'm not entirely sure what this pony has done to you but you should learn to forgive and forget -Cadence." Lowering the letter looking at Duba who is moving his head following the movements of a bee he sneezes provoking it to sting him.
Duba: "Ow."
Twilight Sparkle: Sighs before crumbling the note. "I can choose who I want as a friend every other pony can fall for your little act but I'm not." Slams the door on Duba.
Duba: His eyes water before walking off.
Twilight Sparkle: Peeks through a window. "No Twilight don't fall for it he's only trying to fool you."
Lyra Heartstrings: Sees Duba holding back tears. " Duba are you okay what's wrong?"
Duba: "A bee stung me and it really hurts."
Vinyl Scratch: Crawling on the ground, sneaking up on Spike before pouncing on him.
Spike: Get's knocked down. "Haha, hey no fair you're a jaguar"
Vinyl Scratch: "It's the circle of life. What are you anyways?"
Spike: Looks at his costume. "A fish apparently."
Vinyl Scratch: "Why a fish?"
Spike: "I'm not so sure, I mean it was a fun idea of Duba convincing Ponyville to dress as animals and stuff. But why did I get the fish?"
Vinyl Scratch: "How exactly are the costumed picked?"
Spike: "There's a jungle painted box, you reach in and whatever you pick out is your costume. But a fish what I can I do as a fish?"
Vinyl Scratch: " Speaking of fish where is Duba?"
Spike: Raising an eyebrow. "That didn't make any sense, but I kinda wondered that too I mean he made this day surely he would have shown."
Vinyl Scratch: "Maybe he got sick, or maybe he has to do a speech and is practicing in his costume."
A bird like noise is heard.
Spike: "What was that?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Sounded like a bird." Looking around in the air. "That's weird."
Spike: "Well we can...AGH!!!." Get's swooped off the ground from Duba dressed as a hawk.
Vinyl Scratch: "So that was his costume." Scratching her head puzzled.
Twilight Sparkle: Standing next to a portal, holding a ball. "Ready to play catch Duba?"
Duba: "Yes...I want the ball."
Twilight Sparkle: Tosses the ball into the portal.
Duba: Jumps into the portal and after traveling he falls in a pile of rubble. "Hey, where'd the ball go?" He goes around looking through the rubble. "Found it!!!" Looks up. "Whoa,
Ponyville became such a dump."
Stallion: "Hey, what are you doing without your chains?"
Duba: "Chains? That's not my style of fashion."
King Sombra: "Slave what is the hold up?"
Stallion: "A s-stallion." Whimpers to the ground.
King Sombra: "You dare not answer my question? I shall punish.." Spots Duba. "You come here."
Duba: Walks up to him with the ball in his mouth. "What's up?"
King Sombra: "How dare you speak to me in that tone."
Duba: Spits the ball out. "Sorry, I had the ball in my mouth, what's up?"
King Sombra: "You show no fear of me, how is that so?"
Duba: "Am I suppose to answer that?"
King Sombra: "Well I may not be fearsome to the likes of you, but my queen will surely make you discover true fear and make you the little cowardly filly that you are."
Duba: "But that's not my gender."
King Sombra: Lets out a annoyed grunt then levitates Duba with his magic. "Just come and be silent."
Duba: "Where are we going?"
King Sombra: "What did I just say?"
Duba: "I don't know, what did you say?"
King Sombra: "Grah!!! I can't take this." He teleports to a throne room.
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "My king, I sense you have brought another escapee you want me to torture some sense into?"
King Sombra: "No, it's a pony that I believe you should torture until he can't mutter a word."
Duba: "I can still talk you know."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: Turns to face them. "I see." Inspects Duba. "I will gladly show him some manners."
Duba: "Hi Twilight." He smiles and waves at her.
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "That's Dark Queen Sparkle you peasant."
Duba: "Is it nightmare night already? I didn't bring a costume."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Leave him my King, I will take it from here." King Sombra drops Duba to the ground and leaves the throne room.
Duba: "Queen and King... You're dating Sombra? I thought you liked Flash Sentry?"
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "He was a coward who stood in my way of ruling what's rightfully mine."
Duba: "The library?"
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "My patience is wearing thin with you."
Duba: "I got the ball by the way." Squeezes it a few times making it squeak.
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "I see you enjoy playing games...I have a game we can both play." Gives Duba a menacing grin.
Duba: "Cool, we rarely play anything."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Then follow me." Leads Duba down a flight of stairs before reaching a dungeon with the sounds of ponies crying and begging for freedom.
Duba: "This place is such a downer why did you pick here."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "This is where I play all my games." She forcibly slams Duba to wall and chains him up. "Tell me have you ever wondered what it's like to be an earth pony?"
Duba: "From Applejacks point of view, it sounds boring."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Ugh, that pony tried to talk some sense into me. I would have spared her along with my so called friends but we didn't see eye to eye."
Duba: Poking his eye with his wing. "That sounds painful."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Grr, you are distracting me." Her horn glows as an aura forms around Dubas wing. "Well let's make you a earth pony." The sound of the other prisoners begging for her to stop are heard but she ignores them slowly tearing off Dubas wing. With one final part attaching the wing it comes off. "How did that feel?"
Duba: Squeaking the ball in his mouth. "Is it over yet?"
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "What?!?!" Inspects the area where Dubas wing was. "You aren't screaming in agony, or feeling no pain at all."
Duba: "Yep, me and Vinyl play this game all the time. So my turn right?"
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "For what?" Gets her eye poked by Dubas wing she puts her hoof on her eye. "How dare you harm me."
Duba: "You know what you were getting yourself into you shouldn't have picked this game."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Grr wait here." Disappears into the darkness then returns with a rusty cannon. "This use to belong to somepony but I made a few modifications." She
pulls the string with her magic.
Duba: "That looks like Pink." Get's the air knocked out of him getting hit in the stomach by a spiked ball. The ball in his mouth falls to the ground. He starts to flail around.
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Hehe, I see that did the trick beg..beg me for your freedom slave."
Duba: "I want to get the ball." Trying to reach it but can't due to being chained up.
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "Again no pain? Are you a blubbering idiot or something?"
Duba: "Yes, you call me that all the time."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "I am not the Twilight you know."
Duba: "That's silly of course you're the Twilight I know you're very grumpy."
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: "I can't take much more of this." She picks up a quill and a paper, and starts writing something before unchaining Duba. "Leave my Kingdom and never return."
Duba: "How?" He picks up the ball.
D.Q. Twilight Sparkle: She attaches the note to Duba and opens up a portal tossing him in.
Back at the present Equestria.
Twilight Sparkle: "I'm glad, he's finally off the face of Equestria now I can." She gets interrupted by the sound of a portal opening with Duba falling out of it.
Duba: "Hey Twilight, you're not dressed all depressing anymore. I got the ball." Squeaks it.
Twilight Sparkle: "What the? How is this even possible you were gone for 10 minutes how can you obviously be back?"
Duba: "I dunno ,hey where's my other wing?" A smaller portal opens with his wing falling out of it and landing on Dubas head. "Oh there it is." He notices a note attached to it. He gets it and reads it." He is a fate worse than death never return him to my kingdom. signed Dark Queen Sparkle
Vinyl Scratch: "Hey, Spike Tavi kicked me out again hope you don't mind if I go to the kitchen and grab a bite."
Spike: Blocks the door. "I wouldn't go in there just yet."
Vinyl Scratch: "Why is Duba in there?"
Spike: "Yes along with someone else."
Duba: From behind the door. "You're making a mess. That's not suppose to go there put it here." Smoke alarm goes off.
Cloudchaser: "Real smooth you're messing up the pancakes."A loud screech is heard before the oven explodes.
Duba: "Oh sweet Celestia my wing it's been blown off Cloudchaser you'll have to burn them back in place with that small fire."
Cloudchaser: "I can't do that."
Duba: "Why not?"
Cloudchaser: "Because I already blown off my own hooves."
Duba: "Nooo"
Spike and Vinyl open the door in panic and see the kitchen in normal condition with Duba holding a syrup bottle over a plate of pancakes and Cloudchaser with a pancake in her mouth.
Princess Luna: "I don't feel comfortable lying down in this formation."
Pinkie Pie: "Don't worry Princess Luna you're safe."
Duba: "Yeah we're rated TV-Y so were good."
Princess Luna: "TV what now?"
Duba: Looks at Pinkie before flying up switching the rating from TV-Y to TV-Y7 "We'll because of the bronies we can actually go towards darker sides to our characters like
grimdark and clop."
Princess Luna: "I see and what are these grimdarks and clops you speak of."
Pinkie Pie: Stands on Dubas back to switch the rating to TV-14. "Grimdark is well us but in a gruesome way kinda like the cruel story cupcakes where somepony made me look like a murderer and made me hurt Dashie before turning her into a cupcake I would never do that." Wipes her eyes. "But it was a story and we all know I wouldn't hurt a fly
unless it landed on my cupcake."
Princess Luna: "This is most interesting and what is clop?"
Duba: "Pinkie Pie?"
Pinkie Pie: Hands him a MA card.
Duba: Flies up switching them. "Okay clop is basically what you were worried about earlier being exposed except most the time the ponies involved always show pleasure in what they're doing I blame rule 34 but that's another story. Really really really explicit things happen because of clop mostly showing a mares genitalia and some other weird stuff. Bronies actually enjoy the content but I won't judge."
Princess Luna: "Thou has taught me alot may I see some examples of these grimdark and clop?"
Duba: Looks at Pinkie Pie.
Pinkie Pie: "I am not pulling out that rating card.
The fancy life ain't for me.
Photo Finish: Inspecting Dubas body "Yes, yes so much potential." Lifts up his wings. "Just groomed feathers you are truly model material."
Duba: "I need an adult." He starts to whimper.
Photo Finish: "Ah, but I am an adult more than that I am what will make you famous beyond words, I will take you to the top."
Duba: "The top of what? Because I can fly up there."
Photo Finish: "Humor you are full of surprise I love it." Lifting up the front part of his mane. "I think we will need to dye this maybe silver or white."
Duba: "But it's always been black can't we leave it alone?"
Photo Finish: "Don't you want to be famous."
Duba: "No, I don't even know why I'm here."
Photo Finish: "You were drawn to me."
Duba: "You kidnapped me."
Photo Finish: "A bit rash but when I see someone with potential I will go to extremes to get them on the path to stardom."
Duba: "But I don't want to be a astronaut."
Photo Finish: "Enough of this sillyness you will be a famous stallion and I will be the one to take you there." Gets scissors along with hair dye.
Duba: "Get that stuff away." He flaps his wings and takes off through the ceiling.
Photo Finish: "Hard headed I like that."
Duba: Continues flying until he reaches his house he flies to the closet and slams the door.
Lulu: Hears the door slam and approaches the door. "Dad is that you?"
Duba: "Go away."
Lulu: "Why?"
Duba: "Crazy diva coconut haired pony wants to kill me."
Lulu: "What?"
3 weeks later.
Vinyl Scratch: Knocks on Dubas door. "Hey it's been 3 weeks are you ready to come out?" No answer. "You know poor Lulu has been starving to death is close and is dangerously thin, because you hadn't fed her.
Lulu: "That's not true, I know how to cook for myself."
Vinyl Scratch: "I'm trying to lure him out." Kicks the door handle. "But he's not going to listen so let's do this the hard way." She opens the door and sees a skeleton of a pegasi.
"Oh sweet Celestia Duba!!!"
Lulu: "Dad?!?!"
Duba: Walking into the room with a drink. "What?"
Vinyl Scratch: "Where have you been the past 3 weeks."
Duba: "Canterlot Castle."
Vinyl Scratch: "What were you doing there."
Duba: "I'd rather not say."
Meanwhile at the castle.
Princess Luna: "Thou has the nerve of threatening my student? I shall punish you beyond words." She levitates a razor cutter with her magic.
Photo Finish: "No leave my fabulous mane out of this."
Back at Dubas house.
Vinyl Scratch: "And the skeleton?"
Duba: Shrugs. "It was there when I bought the house." Pokes it. "I think it's dead."
