The Fumble

“Mr. Lash, please explain why a beast from the plains of the Island of Odd and a twelve year old are sitting on the deck of my ship and what possessed you to recruit them as crew members,” Spyglass hissed. “You have thirty seconds.”

“Well, it was really Jam’s idea first. I just acquiesced,” Eye admitted, waving to Space Jam. “Ah, there you are darling! I’m glad to see you made it out of the tavern in one piece. We heard it collapse!”

Spyglass whirled, smoke practically flooding from his nostrils. “Mr. Jam, is this true?”

Jam blanched. “Unfortunately, yes. It was that or-”

“And what, pray tell, made you think you had the right- that you had the authority- to bring on new members of this crew? To just walk up and talk to any old pony wandering the streets of Trottingham - Trottingham, by Celestia’s Grace! - and just offer them a position aboard? Do you understand that I now have to vet them for capabilities that will determine whether they’re an asset to this crew or not, pay them, feed them, find them bunk space? This is an outrage! I am the captain here, not you, and I-”

“Are you quite finished, Captain?” Jam asked, almost lazily. He had not given an inch of ground since the start of Spyglass’ tirade.

Spyglass frowned. This was not how these conversations were supposed to go. Still, he held his own position. “Not entirely. There is also the matter of your-”

“The matter of this, the matter of that, the matter of the Princess’ lily-white ass, Captain,” Jam spat. A few crew members gasped in shock at his profanity, and one particularly sensitive pegasus clapped her forehooves over her ears. “It was bring these two aboard with us or leave one a slave and the other to be hunted down by an angry mob. If you would rather leave us behind, please feel free to turn the Iris around and deposit us at the nearest port. All three of us.” He made a half-step forward, and Spyglass became acutely aware that at his full height, Space Jam was the tallest single pony aboard the ship. “May I remind you that if I depart, the only trained mage you will be able to call on is the esteemed Mr. Lash?”

Spyglass faltered. “I- no, you can’t dismiss practical concerns this way, Mr. Jam! I’m not even sure we have enough space aboard the Iris to house a kangaroo comfortably! We were getting cramped already!”

Patch coughed. “Captain?”

“And even more than that, we haven’t even exchanged half of our goods from the latest prizes for bits! We’ve barely restocked our provisions, and we didn’t even finish before leaving port! I have no idea what any of you ponies are thinking, but I am responsible for the well-being of my entire crew. Saving innocents is excellent, but offering them a permanent berth-”

“Captain, by the Moon’s taint, let me speak!” Patch roared, bringing Spyglass to an abrupt halt. Two of the crew members, still reeling from Jam’s indiscretion, fainted dead away.

Smooth Talk whistled appreciatively. “This guy. I like this guy,” she commented, nudging Leila. “Tells it like it is.”

“If we’re done squabbling about leadership and practical concerns, Captain, may I remind you that you have a fleet now?” Patch snapped. “Just because Miss Vex can pilot the Complete Vexation without our help doesn’t mean we couldn’t house an entire army on it if necessary. I’m pretty sure the hold could carry half of Trottingham if we needed to. And as for supplies, I’ll check with the chef, but I’m fairly sure that even before we weighed anchor in Trottingham we had enough food to carry us to… say, Sable Blanc, before we really have to worry. As long as we’ve taken on water, we’re probably fine.”

One of the pegasi who had appeared to faint raised her hoof. “It’s entirely true!” she gasped, before passing out again.

Patch blinked. “You two aren’t related, are you?” He asked Spyglass, who shook his head numbly.

“Hey, you. Tall, grey, vaguely spooky. I’m talkin’ to you.” Smooth slipped over to Patch’s side. “Did I hear ya right when you said the name ‘Vex’ earlier?”

Patch blinked his one visible eye. “Why? Does that name mean something to you?”

“Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t, not really any of your business until we get to know each other a little better. So we’re startin’ off with nice, proper self-introductions.” Smooth grinned. “Greetings to you kind folks. I’m Smooth Talk, and the wall of spring-loaded muscle and attitude standin’ next to me is Leila…” she pursed her lips. “Hey, Leila, you got a last name or is it just the one?”

“Leila will do just fine, thank ye.” The kangaroo cracked her forepaws. “And I’m very glad you’ve extended the two of us your hospitality, Captain.” She winked at Eye.

Eye winked back, springing to life as he sauntered over to Spyglass’ side. “Indeed, indeed! The ladies are absolutely right, Captain, absolutely one-hundred percent correct. You are the very soul of Harmony and Generosity to consider taking them on board! After all, they’re absolutely indispensable to my future world domination efforts. I can’t imagine anyone in this crew replacing them, unlike certain other individuals who won’t be named to avoid hurting their feelings. After all, I’m certain they’re trying their best!” He grinned, waggling his eyebrows.

Spyglass frowned. “...Mr. Lash, are you trying to threaten me?”

“Threaten? Oh no, Captain,” Eye grinned. “Absolutely not! And even if I was, weren’t you the pony who, just today, told me that discretion was a quality I absolutely lacked? If I lack in discretion, how could I possibly pull off any sort of subtle, nuanced threat to quietly engineer your death and replace you with myself or one of the other crew members should you at any time choose to directly harm the ponies I spent so much time and effort to recruit!” He let out a long, genuine laugh, slapping Spyglass on the back with a hoof. “Anyway, I will be taking my leave. After all, I’m sure Velvet will be most pleased by my return.”

Spyglass made as if to say something, but felt a hoof on his shoulder. He turned to see Space Jam, quietly shaking his head, and nodded at the unicorn. Jam slipped past the Captain, raising his voice. “Actually, Eye, do you think you could find accommodations for Miss Leila and Smooth Talk first?” he asked. “I’ll accompany you in a few minutes, don’t worry. Then we could both see Velvet together,”

Eye giggled. “Oooh! Jam, you are an absolute treasure.” He returned his attentions to Leila. “Well, my dear? Any particular part of our fleet you would like to see first?”

“Have ye got any half-decent booze? I’ve been locked in a tavern with naught but water and piss-warm beer to drink for too long now,” Leila complained.

“I believe I know just the thing!” Eye began to bounce in the direction of the ship’s hold. “Follow me!”

Smooth grimaced. “Pass on the stuff. Rots the brain and loosens up the tongue. It’s bad for business.” She turned her attention to Space Jam. “Smooth moves there, lovebird. Now you mind tellin’ the rest of us why you just went out of your way to make sure your hot pink friend over there doesn’t meet up with this Velvet immediately?”

“Velvet was supposed to follow after us, with my si- my friend, Vex, in tow.” Jam caught himself. “They never showed up along the road, or they would likely be here on deck waiting. I find myself wondering what happened to delay that meeting.”

“That’s twice you’ve said that name. I do know a pony who happens to call herself that.” Smooth Talk grinned up at Space Jam. “Alright, prettyboy, where do you think she’s hiding herself right now?”

Jam pointed a hoof in the direction of the Complete Vexation. “Probably on board that.”

Smooth whistled, then nodded her head in satisfaction. “That settles it. Same Vex.”

Vex stared at the ceiling. Beside her, a cup of tea sat on her desk. The lines of steam from its surface had long since vanished. She took a half-hearted sip, then shook her head. “Lukewarm.”

“Unit-Vex, perhaps it would be prudent to focus on rest. This Unit’s sensors indicate extreme mental fatigue.” Velvet stood to the side, watching quietly. “Normally that cup of tea and possibly the vessel it is contained in would have been consumed by now.”

Vex said nothing. Instead, she turned her attention to the piles of sketches on her desk. “That won’t be necessary, Velvet. I’m certain I will recover. It’s simply a matter of focus. Willpower. Mind over matter.”

“This Unit remains unconvinced. Unit-Vex, you were directly affected by This Unit’s actions in Trottingham. Why?” Velvet’s tone was conversational rather than accusatory- at least, as much as Vex could discern. Her voice still carried a hint of mechanical distortion which made picking out emotions difficult.

Vex closed her eyes. “Those six ponies. I shouldn’t have killed them.”

“This Unit’s memory banks are still operating at a hundred percent capacity. Unit-Vex did not terminate those targets. That duty was left to This Unit, and was executed efficiently and without rancor.” Velvet shook her head, and Vex marveled for a moment that the twitches and jerks from when they had first encountered each other seemed to have faded from the android’s movements almost entirely.

“I gave the order. That is no different than pulling the trigger.” Vex frowned. “And I was too much of a coward to tell you to stop. And my Cutie Mark only appeared afterward. Do you understand? I turned you from a pirate into a weapon, Velvet.” The tears threatened to leak through again. “I’m probably no better than whatever pony built…” she caught herself.

“Unit-Vex, at some point you must admit to This Unit what is concerning you.” Velvet sighed- though lacking lungs and a diaphragm, this was expressed by saying the word “sigh” very softly. “This Unit can assure you, Unit-Vex, that your concerns are unfounded. This Unit could have performed an emergency override of Unit-Vex’s orders if This Unit had deemed them unfit. However, This-Unit also broadly interpreted Unit-Vex’s permission to execute as a directive to execute. Whatever you feel responsible for, Unit-Vex, This Unit wishes to share in that blame.”

Vex said nothing for a few moments. Then she picked up her quill. “Velvet, I’m going to do some work on improving the efficiency of your nonlethal weapons. Promise me that if I panic again, you will not blindly follow me.”

“This Unit has Unit-Vex to thank for the increased judgment that will make this possible.” Velvet nodded. “In addition, This Unit will note that if not for Unit-Vex, those six would have almost certainly ambushed us before we left the harbor, with their entire crew behind them. Escape would have been improbable.”

“Mmph.” Vex began to sketch Velvet’s net-launcher on a fresh sheet of paper. “Even so…”

She didn’t bother to finish the sentence, instead letting the implications tumble through her mind, unsaid. Even so, someday she would have to answer to those six. Even so, nothing about what she did would bring them back. Even so, it was her unthinking orders that had spurred Velvet to use deadly force. Even so, there was nothing she could do to avoid responsibility.

And despite every single ‘even so’, she knew who she was now. She was Vex the Artificer.

She could never repair the damage she had done. She could, however, do what all good artificers did: examine her failure and use it to build anew.

“Velvet, would you mind leaving me alone for a moment? I’m going to do some sketching.”

“Do you promise to show This Unit the results afterward, Unit-Vex?”

Vex hesitated for a moment, then nodded. “Of course.”

“Acknowledged.” Velvet smiled and exited.

Vex took her seat. Now to get some work done-

There was a knock at the door.

“Who is it?” Vex called, not looking up from her sketch. The net had been an excellent concept all on its own, and would be an efficient way to deal with large groups without resorting to Velvet’s more lethal weaponry. Was it possible to expand that design? Perhaps a lasso of some sort, or a net designed to deal with magic-users. Build it from a magic-repellant material, or- no, that might not be flexible enough. A magic-proofed coating, allowing it to resist attempts to throw it off? More promising. The alchemists in Tradewinds seemed to have been close to developing such a substance, and Vex was sure she had copies of someone’s notes from her time skulking through the library. Perhaps it was just a matter of modifying them. She could convince Spyglass to allow her to purchase the equipment she needed the next time they were in port. Perhaps the net would-

That knock again.

Vex continued sketching. “I am incredibly busy. Please state your business or go away,” she called over her shoulder.

“And now is that any way to greet your favorite cousin?” a muffled voice called back from the other side of the door.

Vex’s quill dropped to the paper. She stared straight ahead, dumbfounded. “...Smooth?” she ventured, her voice trembling.

It was impossible. Today was too momentous already. She had fallen asleep and this was an incredibly lifelike dream. She was hallucinating. When she walked to the door and opened it, there was no way under the Sun that she would see a pony she had long ago given up reasonable hope of reuniting with. Hesitantly, Vex stretched her body out and managed to pull the door handle down. It swung open.

“And there you are, Vexy.” Smooth’s eyes glinted and she smiled. “I see you finally managed to steal yourself one of these things, you dirty little rat.”

Vex choked slightly. “...I have already cried twice today and both times were unpleasant. Get in here and hug me before I make it three.”

Smooth leaped forward, tackling Vex into a bone-crushing hug, which she reciprocated as best as she was able. Jam and Velvet hung back, smiling.

The two separated, laughing. Smooth frowned. “What’s with the mane-cut there? Tryin’ for the brooding genius look?”

Vex bit her lip and swept back her mane, revealing her missing eye. “It’s a more practical choice I’m afraid.”

“Moon’s taint!” Smooth cursed, looking at it. “Who did it to ya? Where? How many goons do I need to hire? I’m gonna take their measurements, build ‘em custom coffins, bury them alive in the coffins, and then for good measure I’m gonna cremate them instead!” She pulled Vex close again.

“I did it. To myself.” Vex shook her head. “Alchemical experiment gone wrong. I’ve been more careful since. What about you? I don’t remember you having a cutie mark last time we had the pleasure of speaking.”

Smooth stepped away, her face lighting up as she proudly displayed her mark - while from a distance it looked like the sun with rays of light shooting forth, closer inspection would reveal that the center point was actually a golden coin. “Well, d’you remember the big scam game we pulled with that one nouveau riche who married into House Blueblood- no, you wouldn’t, that one was me and Sturdy Shield from the Guard. We did this whole thing where we convinced him it was a good idea to pour half his savings into the currency exchange in advance of the value of Zebrican silver rising, but then the price actually fell, but the thing is we got his money, only I lost half of it in Los Pegasus and spent the other half trying to hire up a new-” she cut herself off. “Anyway, turns out I’m good at making money. Who knew?”

“Clearly not retaining it, if you’re also here,” Vex teased. “But I’m glad you are.”

Jam stepped in, clearing his throat. “You two are cousins?”

“And partners in crime, and we once posed as foreign dignitaries,” Smooth contributed, pursing her lips. “I never understood how that one went south. D’you think it was before or after the octopus didn’t arrive on time?”

“I believe it was the point at which a translation error resulted in the delivery of several hundred live bees instead of a honeycomb to the royal palace,” Vex replied, shaking her head.

“Anyway, that’s why the two of us ain’t welcome in Canterlot anymore. And why I’m a mare now.”

Jam looked from Vex to Smooth, then buried his face in his hoof. “You two are messing with us, aren’t you?”

“Actually, most of that was true,” Vex replied. “Though in fairness, there were at most fifty live bees and they would not have been a problem if Lady Periwinkle hadn’t turned out to be allergic.”

“Moral of the story: always do your research before you attempt to steal the crown jewels.” Smooth nodded decisively.

Jam shook his head. “Vex, if I hadn’t already seen you in action I’d have said it was impossible for a nine year old to get so wrapped up in as many events as you’ve played a hoof in.”

“Not impossible. Highly improbable,” Vex corrected. Then, abruptly, her good mood seemed to evaporate. “That reminds me of something. Jam, I apologize that Velvet and I were not present. We ran into… difficulties.”

“Difficulties.” Smooth shook her head. “Yeesh. I take my eye off you for five seconds and you lose your eye and stain your coat grey, kiddo. What are we going to do with you?”

Vex froze. “Smooth, my coat has always been grey. Hasn’t it?”

“Pretty sure it was white back in Canterlot,” Smooth replied, brushing through Vex’s coat with a hoof. “Ain’t engine dirt, either. This is- well, would you look at that? Vex, you little somethin’-or-other, you didn’t tell me you had a cutie mark now! Get over here, more hugs!”

Vex’s train of thought was intercepted before it could leave the station as she was enveloped in yet another crushing hug. Jam coughed. “Not to interrupt you two in the middle of a touching family reunion, but it seems as if we all have catching up to do. Perhaps it would be a good idea to make some tea and discuss things over it?”

Vex cast an eye towards her desk, and the sketches on it, then back to Smooth, Jam, and Velvet.

For now her work could wait. “Tea sounds lovely, Jam. I think I still have some of that Shetland blend you and I enjoyed last time.”

“So while I was trying to build up a reputation as the best con mare in Trottingham without anypony actually knowing about that reputation, you got yourself installed as the captain of a battleship in a sky pirate fleet and also you’ve got a pet robot now?” Smooth chuckled and took a sip of her tea, carefully balancing the cup between two surprisingly dexterous forehooves. “Celestia’s Wings, Vexy. You sure know how to find excitement.”

“This Unit clearly resists the implication that she is anypony’s ‘pet robot’,” Velvet intoned, glaring at Smooth. “This Unit is a fully capable automaton with a range of available emotional stimulus replicators and fully-operational logic circuits.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. No idea what half those are,” Smooth set her cup down and waved one of her hooves dismissively. “You want the one who understands fancy engine physics, that’s your mare Vex. Now if you want to sell someone an arcane engine or pet robot, I can get that done.”

“This Unit is not for sale-”

Jam coughed quickly, interceding. “Vex, you were about to mention why you never met up with Eye Lash and I in Trottingham?”

Vex took a sip of her own tea. Jam had helped her brew this pot, and his practiced skill showed- the flavors were far smoother than when she had attempted it several nights ago. She set the cup down carefully, still wary of how weak her magical aura was in comparison to Jam and Velvet’s. “We ran into… difficulties,” Vex admitted. “There were several ponies in the market who appeared to be from the same fleet that the Complete Vexation was a part of.”

Jam’s expression hardened. “Are you certain, Vex? This ship alone represents the culmination of Equestrian technology if half of what you’ve mentioned to me about it is true. Even if it was the flagship and the remainder of this fleet was made up of more conventional airships, it seems unlikely that such a fleet could even be funded. I can’t even think of which noble house would have the bits to undertake such an endeavor without going bankrupt at the end of it.”

“Perhaps somepony did.” Vex closed her eyes. This was the part she hadn’t wanted to talk about. Trying to dance around the subject would only make things more confusing. Best to just say it all at once.

“This Unit regrets to inform Unit-Jam that all possible sources of information were terminated due to risks they posed.” Velvet bowed her head slightly.

Before Vex could even process what had happened, Jam sighed. “I suppose I should have expected that, given the amount of time you spend with Eye.”

Vex felt an intense wave of relief wash through her. She wasn’t sure she was ready to have that conversation with Jam. She wasn’t sure if she ever would be. And now she owed Velvet the truth even moreso than before. “It’s not entirely true that every source was terminated,” she admitted. “None of those ponies are alive, but I did see that the insignia they were wearing matched Velvet’s cutie mark. And they specifically mentioned an ‘Admiral Cerise’.”

Jam froze mid-sip. “What?”

“They also mentioned something about a ‘mechanical impostor’. I believe whatever artificer created Velvet originally intended her to be a decoy or replacement for this Admiral. And now she’s on the hunt for her lost property.” Vex finished her own tea, allowing the heavy tannin aftertaste to linger on her tongue. “We should inform Captain Spyglass of this.”

“This is impossible, Unit-Vex.” Velvet raised her head, her expression as close to panicked as Vex had ever seen it. “This Unit’s directives contain no reference to any other Unit with the designation ‘Cerise’.”

Smooth finished her own tea, shrugging. “I got no idea what’s going on here, but I’ll bite. Assumin’ ‘directive’ is just a fancy word for what you’re supposed to do, what’s your main purpose, metal mare?”

Velvet rattled for a moment. “This Unit’s primary directive is ‘Love Eye Lash’.”

Jam actually dropped his cup in surprise, managing to catch both the fragments and the splash of tea as it shattered with his magic and quickly repair it. “What did you just say?”

“This Unit’s primary directive is ‘Love Eye Lash’. This Unit was created for this explicit purpose, and all other directives are subservient.”

Vex felt the entire world upend itself. “This is ludicrous. There is no way Eye Lash could have built you. And no way an Artificer could know Eye Lash. None of this makes any sense, except-”

A loud knock sounded at the door, followed by Spyglass bursting in. “I don’t want to intrude, but Eye Lash is currently attempting to organize an orgy in the Tomcat’s hold and I could use someone to convince him not to.”

“Huh. I’m watchin’ Equestrian history in the making here,” Smooth muttered. “First time an orgy has ever ruined the mood.”

In spite of herself, Vex burst out laughing.

“I see. So while Jam and Eye Lash were freeing a pair of captives and stumbling on my long-lost cousin, you and Patch tracked down an information broker, fed him the decoded message we recovered from the Vexation, and then received a new one, which we are currently decoding.” Vex stared at the paper in front of her, waves of frustration emanating from her body as she tossed away yet another scrap of paper. “Captain, has it ever occurred to you that we may be flying ourselves into a trap, presuming that this is in fact from the same crew that this ‘Admiral Cerise’ lead?”

“Then I want it decoded even faster,” Spyglass replied, his voice cool. “All the better to know what we’re meant to avoid. Besides, something feels ‘off’ about this whole situation. Even more so than it normally does when Eye Lash is involved.”

The group had relocated to Spyglass’ quarters aboard the Iris, where they sat around a small table. Patch stood near the door, guarding the entrance as best he could. Unfortunately, Eye and Leila had already infiltrated, and as halfway-drunk as the pair seemed to be it was better to allow them to participate relatively quietly than to spend time and energy on forcing them out. Smooth had undertaken the task of keeping them distracted, largely by quietly sharing stories of her previous accomplishments. The three were now engaged in a round-table discussion which occasionally rose high enough in volume to overshadow Vex’s attempts at decoding the encrypted message.

Jam lifted a pen. His own attempts so far had been frustrated. “Captain, Velvet and I have been working on this problem as well and it’s clear where we’re going wrong.” He threw the paper aside. “None of us are trained code breakers. If this cipher is more complex than the previous, you might have just traded our first bit of information for one we can’t use.”

“I am not turning these ships around and returning to Trottingham. We don’t have enough bits to bribe the guards, for one thing.”

“I could shoot them!” Eye sang out, wandering over to the table.

“Mr. Lash, shooting the Trottingham guard would probably be a civil service well-rendered, but it is far more trouble than it is worth. Please do not disturb our code-breakers while they are working,” Spyglass growled.

“Well, they aren’t making any progress one way or the other. Come now, Captain, surely it wouldn’t hurt for me to look,” Eye crooned, peering over to take a look at the cipher. “Hmm? Oh, isn’t this just a Veracity cipher? Those are just based on a series of Imperator ciphers. All easy things, you just need the right keyword to start.” He waggled his eyebrows. “I suggest ‘dicks’.”

“Ignore him,” Spyglass ordered the decoders.

Jam took a closer look at the cipher. “Actually… he’s right, I think. I’m not sure about the key word, but I do vaguely remember reading about Veracity ciphers at one point. This could be one.”

Vex nodded. “Velvet, could you verify?”

“This Unit sees no evidence to contradict Unit-Eye’s assessment of the cipher. Now attempting to decode.”

“Try ‘eclipse’,” Spyglass suggested.

Velvet whirred for a moment. “Negative.”

“Should’ve known they wouldn’t be that easy,” Spyglass muttered. “Try ‘Trottingham’?”

“Negative.”

“Sun?”

“Negative.”

Spyglass grew increasingly frantic. “Celestia? Moon? Overthrow?”

“Cerise?” Jam suggested.

“Negative. Negative. Negative. Negative.” Velvet’s entire body had begun to vibrate by this point as she taxed her circuits. “This Unit respectfully requests narrowing the focus of the search to the correct keyword, as this process is somewhat of a burden on This Unit’s computation power.”

Vex groaned. “Of course it will be,” she muttered. Then, in a louder voice. “Velvet. Go ahead and try ‘dicks’.”

Spyglass scoffed. “You can’t be serious. You, of all ponies, cannot believe that the keyword could possibly be-”

“‘Dicks’ appears to be the correct keyword for this cipher. Now decrypting.”

Spyglass coughed. “If any of you need me, I will be under the table,” he managed before falling on his side.

Jam frowned. “Eye, how did you know that was the correct key word?”

“I didn’t! It was a lucky guess,” Eye called back, posing dramatically.

Jam sighed. “...Eye, I’ve been meaning to ask you this for a while now. Why is there a mess of grease all over your flank?”

“Oh, that’s my cutie mark! Isn’t it dramatic?” the stallion struck a pose. “I drew it on myself!”

“You should see the real one underneath it,” Smooth piped up. “It’s somethin’ special.”

Leila doubled over with laughter. “Ah, feck, that’s never going t’be old, innit?” she roared, clapping Eye on the back. “Go on, ye bastard, tell ‘em all the tale of your Cutie Mark!”

“The real one?” Jam asked softly. Were his coat not white, the color draining from his face would’ve been quite obvious.

“Ignore these two scoundrels,” Eye protested, holding up his hooves defensively. “This is definitely my real cutie mark! Absolutely! Positively! There is no way that the real one is entirely unfitting for someone of my stature!”

“S’a pegasus gettin’ shot in his balls,” Leila contributed.

“You can actually see a little bit of the blood if you look very closely.” Smooth grinned, pointing.

Jam began to peer closer. “What in Celestia’s name…”

Eye’s horn began to glow with a bright pink light. “I told all of you! That is not grease! It’s the real mark!” he shouted, before releasing the spell. Everypony held their hooves to their eyes, momentarily blinded.

When the light faded, Jam stared in horror. Where there had once been an admittedly-elaborate mess of grease, there was now a very clear drawing. Whatever had been there before, Eye’s cutie mark was now a crude, child-like painting of Equus consumed in fire and covered by a crown. A gentle prodding (accompanied by a rather awkward response from Eye) revealed that it was as genuine a mark as any other pony’s.

Jam made a small choking noise. “...Did anypony else see what he did?”

Mutely, most of the room nodded. Leila scratched her head. “Aye, he changed his arse tattoo out for a different one with a magic spell. What of it?”

“Do you understand what that means?” Jam managed. “A Cutie Mark isn’t some tattoo, it is the representation of finding your vocation, your true calling and talent! Changing it at will is tantamount to changing your essence! It requires levels of magical control and potential I can’t even think about!”

Before Leila could offer a response, the entire ship shuddered, sending everypony in the hold off balance. A voice from the deck called down. “Captain! We’re under attack!”

Vex froze. “It can’t be…”

A booming voice echoed through the air. “By the order of Admiral Cerise, surrender the Mechanical Impostor and the Commander now, or face death!”