I Literally Am Not Going To Let Myself Get Up To Get A Drink (I'm Thirsty) Or Use The Restroom (I Need To Pee) Until I've Written A Thousand Words. Nevermind I Spent 3 Hours on XKCD. Nevermind It's Now Two Or Three Days Later. Nevermind It's Now Tomorrow.

Swing Boxes Red and gold autumn . I see your lips , the summer kisses . I used to keep the skills of tanning. Since you raised to date Just listen to the music of the old winter . But most important, I think you're my son. When autumn leaves start t

Mort sighed. He hated it when undead ponies became dead while in Tartarus. Oh snap, Mort is showing up. You know where Mort first shows up? Mort Takes a Holiday. That's a much better story than this one. Anyway, Mort nudges the crumpled pile of body parts, groans, and wanders off to find a wheelbarrow. He scoops Caramels body into it, stooping down to grab the few extra pieces that have fallen off. Then he carts it over to the spider room. The spider room is, as one might guess, filled with spiders. Some of the spiders are dead and some are alive. In a nod to continuity, the spiders there were currently celebrating the arrival of a new dead spider from above, the one that Caramel had accidentally squished earlier.

Anyway, when Mort wanted to send something elsewhere, he sent it via spiders, since he had a lot of important duties in the underworld and up above, and couldn't be constantly sending stuff all over who knows where. So he told the spiders to take Caramel's body back up to Celestia. He included a letter to Celestia that's intentionally vague as to sustain the suspense of whether Caramel will ever get to inspect that cart. And like, if he'll come back to life, and stuff. Here's what the letter said:

Dear Princess Celestia: Here's Caramel's body. You know how these things work. Let me know when you need his soul. And hey, maybe actually set aside some money in your budget for sinkhole repairs, y'know?

~Sincerely, Mort

So hundreds of thousands of spiders worked together to carry the parts that collectively made up Caramel up out of the ground and across Equestria towards Canterlot Castle. Nopony tried to stop them, because, honestly, would you mess with 100,000 spiders? I don't think so.

Youtube Video

Unless you like poking death's minions with a stick.

Anyway, they swarmed up the mountain, over the castle ramparts, and deposited Caramel's body in Celestia's private chambers. Celestia was understandably not amused.

Next Chapter