The Diary of John, the Least Interesting Stallion in Equestria.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Dear Diary,

I'm sorry that I didn't write in you yesterday. I was simply too busy. Firstly, I could not stand sleeping out in the park bench. Wrecked or not, my house is the only place to sleep that isn't too exciting. I went home and found my bed amid the ruins, shoved some broken support beams off, and then went to sleep.

Upon waking up, I went to what used to be my kitchen and prepared breakfast as best as I could. Fortunately, the stove survived and I was able to heat up some water to make tea and oatmeal. After breakfast, I set about the business of retrieving as much from the rubble as I could. It would appear that I was mistaken yesterday, as there was a lot more that survived the accident then I had initially suspected.

My manual for the E.S. 000 survived, fortunately, as did my toothbrush, toothpaste, and some bits. I could not find much else. Not that I had much else to find. I make it a point not to own too many things, which could lead to excitement and excitement, as you know, is very unhealthy for ponies such as myself.

As I was retrieving what few items I had from the wreckage from my home, I promptly decided to temporarily move into my store. While I was about to leave, however, I noticed that it was time for me to open up my store. Of course, I was already on my way there, Diary, so I simply continued walking.

What happened next, Diary, was very nice. In fact, it was the thing which made me feel less upset over the whole matter. Miss Derpy Hooves walked into my store. Of course, at this point my heart began racing terribly in anticipation of another rather reckless incident. Quite the opposite happened, however. She needed to buy an air-conditioning manual. I forgot what for, however. I was too distracted by how she was acting. She seemed to be shy and embarrassed. I don't quite know why she was, but before I thought to ask, she left.

A few minutes later, Miss Rarity came into the store in need of a sewing machine manual. After buying it, she left rather quickly. I wondered what was going on still, and hoped it wasn't too exciting.

Throughout the day, at about minute-long intervals, Miss Twilight Sparkle came in needing a manual for a magic-powered science machine, Miss Apple Jack bought a sprinkler manual, Miss Fluttershy purchased a manual for a pet-feeder, Miss Rainbow Dash bought a flight navigator manual, and Miss Pinkie Pie purchased a manual for an oven. Those were only the ponies whose names I remember, however. Pony after pony went into my store, buying manuals until I was completely out of stock.

I was about to close the store, when Miss Derpy Hooves came in, still shy. I asked her what was bothering her. Then she told me. She was feeling bad about wrecking my house. It took her until the next morning to realize what she did, and it was making her very upset. The reason that no pony had passed by my ruined house while I was in it was because Miss Derpy Hooves had, with the mayor's help, held a town-wide meeting. They all decided to each come by my store and buy one manual until I was out of stock, to help pay for the repairs needed to fix my home.

I was not sure what to say, but that has to be one of the nicest things anypony has done for me. I simply must find a way to thank Miss Derpy Hooves later on.

As for today, Diary, nothing much happened. I need to re-stock my store, and until the construction crew arrives I will have to live here. That is fine, though. I have a back room big enough to hold my bed and my tea and oatmeal, and there is a distinct lack of exciting things happening here. I do believe that I will enjoy a break from all this ridiculous excitement.

Well, I must go to bed now.

Goodnight, Diary.

Sincerely,

John