1000 Ways To Die

Date: October 28, 2013
location: Smokey Mountains, Grave Digger's Cemetary

"Ahh!! Ugh!! Help!!"

Something was walking with skin falling off and blood dripping. Look out it's a zompony. Well actually no that's Grave Digger looking to be a bit in trouble. What happened to him well we've heard of him in some of our deaths before. Grave Digger took his job seriously. Well at least he used to when he started years ago. He would dig a hole for somepony and repeat. After doing it for years though he got sick of it.

"Only twenty more years till retirement." He said digging another hole.

All he really wanted to do was golf. Every time he got the chance he would golf. Even when he was on the clock, he would bring his golf bag and even play golf in the cemetery. It was his own golf course. He would use the tombstones and other things he had to play golf with. He had no respect to ponies that have passed away. He dug holes and tried to get a hole in one. Sometimes he got so lazy he didn't even bury the caskets holding dead ponies and try to get a hole in one in the hole they were in.

"Hole in one ya hear that from the dead!! Ha Ha!"

He sprayed fungicide on the grass and kept playing. He picked up his golf tees by using his mouth. He showed a complete lack of respect to the occupants. He took a piss near someponies tombstone and began to play golf again. One day though Grave Digger had a high fever and blisters all over his body. Thinking nothing of it and thought it was just the flu he would take simple medicine. His family was worried about him. Stubborn not to go to a doctor even though the family begged him to go he went to his cemetery instead to...work.

"I' m fine I don't need no doctor!! Now give me my golf bag!!" He shouted at his family.

That day he played like he always did. Then he started to feel tired. He found some shade and decided to sleep off the flu he had. While he was asleep two emo ponies who were a couple sneaked into his cemetery and began making out.

"I wonder if will see a zompony. Ha ha." The stallion said.

"Well let me bite you on your neck you sexy stallion." The mare said given the stallion a hickey.

After an hour of them making out Grave Digger finally woke up and his flu wasn't gone but that was the least of his problems.

"Ahh!! Ugh!! Help!!" When Grave Digger woke up the blisters, he had was now his skin peeling off. His mouth was full of blood. When he saw the emo couple, he tried to ask for help but to them he looked like a real zompony

"Ahhh!!!" The mare shouted.

"Let's get out of here!!!" The stallion shouted.

They ran off and Grave Digger...

*Plop*

Finally hit the ground dead.

How did his sickness end up like that anyways? Twilight explain more of what happened here.

"When he sprayed fungicide on the grass and held the golf tees that he put on the ground with his mouth he ingested chlorothalonil a very commonly used fungicide. Unfortunately for him had an allergic reaction to it. This caused flu like symptoms and the next phase is your skin begins to peel off. It's very rapid and within an hour it's all over your body and even the inside of your body the same thing is happening. You can actually choke on your own windpipe and die from asphyxiation.

Grave Digger had no respect for the dead. The ponies under the grave hated him and decided it was time for him to die. Hey, Grave Digger, I need you to dig another hole...For yourself.

Way To Die #130: Par For The Corpse