Author's Note

Sorry, the picture isn't the best the only pictures I have are saved on my phone I'm close to paying for a new computer that will totally help me a lot more on making stories but it cost a lot more than my last one. Coming up we got a pony that sticks things up where the sun don't shine. Nasty.

Human Off Topic (Created by Damien Martino)

Date: July 9, 2016
Location: Human World, Law Office

Well, looky looky. Off Topic. We've seen this jerk before. He died in Equestria. How about in the Human World. He was a businessman in this world because he lied and got to the top by doing it. He was happy he had a nice new office that was amazing. However, what he really was impressed with. Was himself.

"I have a lot of money and I can give any women a good time." He said to Lyra who was with Bon Bon.

One of Off Topic's favorite past time was hitting on any women he could find which right now was Lyra and Bon Bon even though they were already together. How did they get the job? Well, Off Topic hired them to get lucky with them. You would think he would know better. Ha. That's a laugh. He was a sexual harassment case in a thousand dollar suit.

We have a pony that knows something about law and companies called Business Savvy.

"Partners at law firms have a lot of power and influence over the careers of brand new associates. You really need the job and you're really at this pon- I mean person's mercy. You don't want to screw this up. Pretty much all you can do is follow what they say and if you do what they tell you to do you'll have a good chance of getting the job. Law jobs are very hard to get into and find but if you get lucky you find one that pays well and stick to it."

Finally Off Topic was showing Lyra and Bon Bon his new office with a view and locked the doors behind him. he wanted their bodies and he wanted them now.

"Beautiful view isn't it but you two are more beautiful." Off Topic said.

"Yeah, sure whatever." Bon Bon said rolling her eyes.

That pickup line was terrible, however, Off Topic had one more trick up his sleeve. He had a prank he liked to play to impress the ladies. In his new office that I should mention was on the 40th floor he would get a running start and throw himself into the window. The tempered glass would always bounce him back. That impressed many girls and if that didn't he would give them many raises so they could jump on his desk and right on him.

So we got a pony that makes Windows and fixes them called Window Fixer. She usually fixes the glass around Ponyville when Rainbow Dash pulls off a Sonic Rainboom. Also when Rainbow or any other pony crashes into one.

"Tempered glass is just unpredictable. It was developed as a safety technique so that pon- people wouldn't get cut on it. Not to throw yourself at it and bounce back. On impact, it could just break."

"Watch this girls." Off Topic said getting a running start heading to the tempered glass.

*Crash!!!*

"AHHHHHH!!!!" Off Topic shouted falling from the 40th floor.

" Oh My God He's Insane!!!!" Bon Bon shouted while Lyra looked away holding on to her.

Off Topic took a running start...and never stopped.

*Boom!!!*

What was that? Well, that was Off Topic's body hitting the ground. Hey, Nurse Snowheart what happened to Off Topic here.

"Once they discovered that their imminent death is there they most likely would have pissed themselves. Anyways he probably died instantaneously. He skull shattering on the ground and his brain herniating out on the street. His spine probably shattered along with his skull and shattered his spinal cord and his body was nothing but a mess."

Well Off Topic you died in two worlds. You're going down...Straight to hell.

Way To Die #72: Shattered Dream