The Great and Powerful Reward

The Penis Monster's Relief

“Well would you look at that,” Twilight said to herself, somewhat in awe. Actually, she wasn’t sure if she’d said it to herself. Any one of the dozens of ponies galloping past her in fear could have heard her, in which case, she’d said it to those ponies. Maybe they’d heard her, maybe they hadn’t. It didn’t really matter at that point, anyway, because Rainbow Dash’s screaming had been correct. There was most certainly a monster; it was most certainly giant; it most certainly a penis. “That matches Rainbow Dash’s description perfectly,” she continued, running through the 3-item checklist in her head.

“It’s a good thing I brought this with me,” she thought, pulling a book out of her saddlebag. Upon hearing the screams of her pegasus friend, Twilight had grabbed a copy of A Reference Guide to Sexual Predators and ran out of the library. Now, she flipped through the pages with her magic, looking for the entry on Giant Penis Monsters. The monster was, obviously, a predator of a sexual nature, so it would definitely be included in the book.

Seemingly unaware of the ponies screaming and running all around her, Twilight sat down in the middle of the street to read. She was not at all distracted by the fact that just a few hundred feet away, a raging monster was levelling a good portion of the town.

“Aha! Here it is,” she declared, once again, probably not to anypony in particular. She’d found the entry: Penis Monster, Giant. There it was, right in between Pedophile and Pentagram Demon. The latter entry piqued her interest, so she made a mental reminder to research pentagrams when she had less pressing matters to attend to. For the time being, she’d have to focus on the penis monster.

She quickly read through the page, absorbing all of the information despite the ambient chaos. Apparently, the only way to stop her current foe without killing it was to provide it with sexual release. “Okay, let’s do this,” she snorted, looking up from her book to get a better look at her prey. She’d thought that Trixie’s dick had been big, but compared to this beast, it seemed more like a pencil that had been sharpened almost all the way to the eraser. Estimating the monster’s size, she guessed that the diameter of its shaft was at least four feet. There was no way she’d be able to fit something that big inside of her. Pinkie Pie wouldn’t even be able to do it, no matter how much she’d been sleeping around, there was no way she was THAT loose.

There was not anypony in town who’d be able to help. This was a job for something bigger. Something like... a dragon! But there were no fully grown dragons nearby, at least none that would be willing to help her. She was only acquainted with one dragon, but he was even smaller than she was, so he wouldn’t be any help. Unless... unless she could use the Growth Acceleration spell that made a creature temporarily grow to adulthood! Of course! She didn’t know any grown dragons, so she’d MAKE a grown dragon!

Twilight giggled evilly to herself as she tucked her book away and turned around to start looking for her scaly purple-and-green assistant.

“Spiiiike! Where aaaaare yoooou? I need your help with something!”

*** Several Hours Earlier ***

Spike was meandering down a road near the outskirts of Ponyville. He’d been unable to find Rarity at her boutique, which was strange, considering it was only shortly before opening time. Normally, Rarity would have been preparing for the day, getting ready to sell dresses and fix buttons and all that stuff. Of course, Spike would have done everything in his power to make sure she had to do as little work as possible, instead, he would offer his help so that she could relax. Something important must’ve come up for Rarity to leave her shop in the morning.

So, he walked, idly wondering where the love of his life had gone. That was what he’d been doing when he happened upon an opossum. Upon Spike’s approach, the opossum immediately had a heart attack and died. Well, the opossum had FAKED a heart attack, and his consequent death. But Spike lived in a library, and he’d read a book or two before, so he was well aware of the opossum’s tendency to play dead when threatened. Not only did Spike live in a library, but he also spent most of his time with a pony who never missed an opportunity for research. Therefore, Spike recognized his chance to perform a valuable experiment: How long would an opossum play dead while being constantly aggravated by a predator?

Spike quickly glanced around, and he soon located the necessary tool that he needed for the experiment. Picking up a stick from the ground, he brandished it above his head and declared, “For Science!”

He then took a seat next to the opossum and began to poke it with his Experimental Science Tool.

***

“BAM,” exclaimed Twilight’s teleportation spell as she exploded into existence near the outskirts of Ponyville, conveniently close to where Spike was sitting in the dirt. The sudden noise startled the dragon, but earned no response from the still-dead opossum.

“Oh, Twilight! I’m glad you’re here,” he began to explain, calming down once he realized that the explosion was just Twilight. “You see, I’ve been sitting here poking this dead opossum for a few hours now, and at first I thought it was just playing dead, but now I’m starting to wonder if it’s actually dead or not.”

Twilight was quickly distracted from her mission of saving Ponyville. An expression came on to her face that could be read as saying something along the lines of “Ooh, scientific research!” She took a few steps closer to the opossum, preparing to use her magic to check for vitals. But then she paused in the middle of a step, seemingly realizing that she was losing focus. She forced herself to avert her eyes from the glorious, beautiful science that was being done right in front of her. Barely managing to fight off the temptation of the research, she took on a stern tone with Spike. “Not now Spike, there’s a terrible crisis happening in Ponyville as we speak, and I’ve been teleporting all over the place looking for you. You’re the only one who can help!” Then she picked him up in her purply magical glow and levitated him away from his test subject.

“BAM,” her spell exclaimed once again, as the unicorn and the dragon seemingly vanished from existence. The opossum still did not move.

A few minutes passed, and the opossum cracked open one eye, carefully checking his surroundings for danger. When he’d confirmed that the annoying dragon was gone, he scurried back to his home in a nearby tree.

When he got home, his opossum wife was so happy to see him, that they had wild and crazy opossum sex all over the tree!

***

Somewhere in a house near the center of town, a pony sat back and stretched after slaving away at his desk for hours.

“Aww yeeeaah! Opossum sex. Nothin’ classier. Nothin’ hotter.”

On the pony’s desk rested a small name-plate that read, “Ren A. Sans.” The name plate served no practical purpose, because the desk was pushed up against a wall, and the face of the plate, which was at the edge of the desk, was pressed directly against said wall. Therefore, nopony would possibly be able to read it. It could really only be used as a device for the omniscient narrator to introduce the owner of the desk.

“Yup... Opossums going at it. I think that’ll be enough clop for this chapter. After all, my readers are some pretty messed up people. They can probably get off to that kind of stuff.”

Suddenly he sits at attention and looks at you, just now noticing that you were observing him.

“Oh, hello there, reader. I guess it’s time for my self-insert.” He clears his throat. “Um, hello! I’m Ren A. Sans, and I should probably stop wasting your time and get back to writing.”

The pony bent over his desk once more and pulled out a new piece of parchment from a nearby drawer. He took a quill in his mouth and dipped it in his inkwell. Before he began writing, he took a moment to observe the terror caused by the giant penis monster rampaging just outside his window.

Right as he was about to touch his quill to the parchment, the entire wall of his house caved in, showering him in wooden splinters and shards of glass. A moment later he was crushed by the enormous weight of a gigantic penis monster falling on top of him.

He died instantly because he was OC. He got what he deserved.

Anyway, you may be wondering, “Does that mean the story’s over, since the author just died?” Allow me to answer that question by simply continuing the story. I will now pretend that the entire incident with Ren A. Sans never even happened.

***

Twilight and Spike appeared just in time to witness the phallic titan demolish yet another house. Quickly checking to make sure the house wasn’t the home of her or any of her five friends, she concluded that it’s destruction was no great loss, for it was clearly unimportant. She might have heard the screams of a certain OC dying inside the building, but she couldn’t be sure. Whether she’d heard it or not, it wasn’t important.

“What IS that thing!?!” Spike shouted, gesturing at the monster.

She turned to her purple companion. “It’s a giant penis. I need your help to stop it. I’m going to use my Growth Acceleration spell to turn you into an adult dragon. Then, I’ll need you to use your soon-to-be giant mouth to give the monster a blow job. Sound good?”

“What? But I don’t--”

“Good! Here goes.”

Twilight’s horn began to glow as she readied her magic. A deep red mist began to flow out of her horn and drift towards Spike.

“Twilight please stop! I’ve never done anything like this before! What if-- HNNNNNN!” Spike’s pleading was cut short as the magic mist enveloped him and his body began to expand.

One second, he was a small baby dragon. The next, he was a few times taller and his arms grew almost all the way to the ground. Next, his torso extended and his limbs grew thicker. Finally, in one great burst, the size of his entire body increased exponentially, taking the form of a fully grown dragon. The mist faded, and Spike could barely see Twilight because she was so far below him.

He glanced around. Ponyville seemed a LOT smaller. None of the buildings were even half of his height, especially since a lot of the nearby ones had been demolished by the now-relatively-small penis monster. Remembering his purpose, he quickly spotted the beast. A single step brought him to his target. He bent over to get a better look.

The monster had stopped its destructive behavior as soon as it had seen a huge dragon appear. It immediately recognized the fact that such a large creature was its only chance for relief, so it charged. As luck would have it for the penis monster, the dragon bent over upon its approach. This presented a target for the monster. It ran as fast as it could between the dragon’s legs, then crouched down in preparation to jump. It shot into the air, flying on a path directly towards the dragon’s asshole. There was its relief. That was where the monster would finally be able to calm itself.

But Spike, for some reason, did NOT want a giant penis monster jumping into his asshole. So he knocked the monster out of the air with one of his powerful claws. he penis fell to the ground, altogether uninjured thanks to its rock-hard body, then used its pubic hairs to right itself. It charged towards the dragon once again.

This time, Spike was prepared, so he reached out to intercept the penis while it was still on the ground. As he was about to grab it, he hesitated.

This monster was a giant penis. Did he really want to touch it? No. He didn’t. He drew his claw away. But he had to grab it. It was for the sake of Ponyville and all of his friends. He had no choice. He had to do what he had to do.

He reached out and took the giant penis in his claws, grimacing. As soon as he had a hold of it, the monster started to struggle, wiggling it’s body in an attempt to break free. The thought crossed Spike’s mind that the monster might actually be wiggling because it enjoyed the feeling of rubbing against his scales, but he immediately pushed that thought out of his head. But that thought was soon replaced by another: the thought of what he was supposed to do next.

He felt sick. Here he was, holding a penis, about to suck on it. He’d never imagined he’d have to do something like this, and he most certainly didn’t want to. A full minute passed as he stood there staring at the wiggling penis, the only thoughts in his head were about how much he didn’t want to do it.

With the monster’s rampaging stopped, the atmosphere had returned to that of an ordinary day in Ponyville. It was quiet and calm. The birds could be heard singing, and a playful breeze danced across Spike’s scales.

Twilight’s impatient voice called out from far below. “Come oooon, Spike. What are you waiting for? Suck on the giant penis so we can get this over with!”

Spike took one last look at the penis monster with dread, then closed his eyes. He began to bring the it closer to his mouth. Spike concentrated with all his might to think of something else as the penis drew closer, “Imagine it’s Rarity. Imagine it’s Rarity. Imagi-- Wait. Rarity’s a mare. That doesn’t make any sense.” But before he could come up with something else to think of, the penis made contact with his lips.

The monster, sensing its opportunity, shot straight into Spike’s mouth. It found bliss as it felt the warm slimy walls enclose it on all sides, rubbing it all over. It latched its pubic hairs onto the dragon’s face and used them to push itself in and out of the mouth.

Spike’s claw fell away from his face and he stumbled backwards as the penis began to move itself inside of him. He was so surprised and taken aback that his mind went blank, refusing to process the fact that it was really happening.

The testicles dangling out of Spike’s mouth began to swell as the monster picked up the pace, forcing itself deeper, all the way into Spike’s throat. After only a few more thrusts, the penis began to throb, and its balls visibly shrunk.

The wave of semen crashing down Spike’s throat forced him to gag and cough, shooting the monster into the air. He bent over and spat, trying to get the slimy substance out of his mouth. He succeeded somewhat, dumping pools of giant penis monster seed in the middle of the street.

A couple hundred feet away, the giant penis monster collapsed in the ground, giving a happy sigh. Its body began to deflate, losing its hardness. It was satisfied, and it would rampage no more.

A/N: (Added about a day after this chapter was posted) Wow. I just went back and reread this chapter, and I realized something important. It sucked. But it wasn't just this chapter that was bad, each chapter has been worse than the last. So, I think the end of this story is near. I'll have to put it out of its misery so it won't have to suffer for too long.