Twilight Sparkle and the Stupid Original Pony

Zecora’s mystic hollow tree cottage glew invitingly through the trees ahead of us, warm light and the smell of food slipping through the chinks in her shutters. Inside, Zecora, vocalized to a wordless melody.

I glanced at Ishaz – his expression evinced a conflict of eagerness and trepidation.

“Keep calm, buddy. Barring the last half hour, you’ve been a girl all your life. Nothing to be afraid of. Girls don’t bite.”

“Actually, some do.”

“You know what I mean.” I smiled. “Zecora is nice, just keep calm.”

“Sorry, I’m trying not to panic. Only now I have some new hardware, sending some very strong messages for my brain to try to moderate.”

“Deep breaths, stay cool, step outside of the confusion. This’s gonna be fine.”

—

Gloam was peering out into the night and threw the door open as soon as we approached.

“Mom! Mom! Mom! Can I be a zebra too? It’s just a temporary potion.”

“Of course, dear,” I chuckled, “but your stripes will have to be violet and grey to match your parents.”

“That makes sense, I’ll go tell Zecora it’s okay!”

Twilight caught my eye as soon as I entered; I sidled over to her as Ishaz stood nervously by the door.

“Zecora has eyes for Isha,” she whispered to me. “I don’t suppose she’s gotten over you?”

“He. And yes, he was officially over me as soon as Zecora stepped out of the undergrowth.”

“He?” Twilight snuck a look past me. “Oh my, yes indeed, very ‘he’.”

“I’ve named him ‘Ishaz’. It sounds more masculine without the trailing vowel.”

“Good idea, for a stud like that.”

—

Twilight wandered back to the kitchen to see if she could help with anything and I checked in with Ishaz to see if he was remembering to breath.

“Doin’ okay?” I asked.

“Just trying to keep calm. And enjoying the smells. Dinner smells good.”

“Yeah it does.”

“I can’t believe our last meal on Terra was those damn FSBs. What a last memory of home.”

“Oh, the shame!” I kidded.

“You, too,” he said.

“Nuh uh, not me.”

“Then what did you have for breakfast today?”

“I sucked Twilight’s dick before we woke everybody up this morning.”

“Better than a food substitute bar?”

“More enjoyable.”

—

Supper was a thick Zebronican stew, redolent of exotic spices and containing no sign of the day’s bounty of ominously funky mushrooms. The aromas were familiar from my previous visit to her home, but I had never sampled Zecora’s cooking before.

“The food, dear hostess, is quite delish,
and could I make a culinary wish
you’d teach chef Londarz this dish”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, dear,” Twilight said, “if you ever see him cooking, Voox is kinda uptight. In fact, I recommend you don’t go near the kitchen when he’s in there.”

“Good advice,” I agreed without adding further detail about my experience cooking for Londarz Voox.

“My mode of cooking would give him no pleasure,
the simple truth: I never measure,”

Zecora explained.

“I don´t think Voox would approve,” Twilight said.

“His loss,” my temporarily striped daughter said as she tore another piece of the thin flatbread that formed both serving dish and utensil, and used it to grab another bite of stew. “This is super good, Zecora!”

“Thank you for your words, kind,
you may learn from me, if so inclined.”

—

“Oh, Bear!” I cried after dinner, remembering that he had shut down to avoid the havoc that holy ground could play on transcendentally complex technology. I dug him out of my satchel ready to hoof the green button as he had instructed me.

“Wait,” said Twilight, “why did he shut down?”

“The shrine is holy ground. Did you see what was happening to the enforcers?”

“They obviously weren’t happy, I couldn’t tell why.”

“It fried their electronics, and all their plastics and synthetics break down, and their weapons melted. Those things are not allowed.”

“Oh.”

“Ask Gloam about the synthetics, sometime. Got any secrets you need to tell me before I wake him up?”

“I love you,” she whispered, leaning in as for a kiss.

“I think he’s figured out that much,” I said as I picked myself up off the floor after she tackled me.

I hoofed Bear’s startup button and as his lights blinked to life I addressed our hostess,

“Zecora, though the evening draws to end,
I must introduce another friend.”

I held Bear up for her to see him and vise versa.

“Bear, this is our friend Zecora. She’s an herbalist and shaman and just generally spooky-cool pony. Zecora, this is my friend and guardian, Bear.”

Zecora faced Bear and rhymed,

“The day with wonders was quite thick
it does seem right
that on this night
I somehow might
make converse with a metal brick.”

Bear answered in kind,

“Rhyming sorceress a pleasure to meet,
you this evening, and now I will mete,
out to you the knowledge of my name bare,
miss Zecora, you may call me just: Bear.”

“Mmm, homophones, ” said Gloam sagely, “nice one, Bear.”

“Thank you, Gloam, I did not realize it was a contest.”

“Huh?”

“You stated that I won nicely.”

“Ugh! Did you program my mom or did my mom program you?”

—

As we all bedded down in Zecora’s living room I asked Twilight, “Home to Ponyville tomorrow? Gloamie, you’re going to love daddy’s castle.”

“Only a quick stop, and then on to Canterlot. I must speak with my teacher.” Twilight’s voice held a grim note but she would not elaborate.

When Gloam’s breathing transitioned from ‘pretending to be asleep’ to the more natural sound of actual sleep, I nudged Twilight. When she opened her eyes I nodded towards the door. She guessed what I had in mind and didn’t hesitate.

The thin winter moon shone weakly far above the forest canopy. Very little made it through to show our way and we stepped carefully through the shadows. A few lengths from Zecora’s, the path to Ponyville took a sharp turn. Beyond the corner Twilight led me off the way, where the soft floor of the forest reduced our hoofsteps to silence.

“How’s it having your, you know, back?”

“I liked my female body (and what you could do to it, Princess) a lot, but maybe you’d like to remind me what it’s like to have one of these. It’s weird talking about the change, isn’t it?”

“It is! And I don’t understand why. There was nothing in any of the books about that side effect. And believe me, when I was working on that spell I read everything that’s been written about gender-play spells in the last two thousand years.”

Apparently she missed the chapter on ‘what happens if asilly idiot pours extra magic into the spell’. There was far more to the change than the changes to our bodies. But now, after spending nine years yearning to be penetrated by her, the reversal had been complete and instantaneous. I wanted that royal pussy bad.

“Do you still want to be called my wife, Tangent?”

“Yes, Princess.”

“Then get your dick over here and buck your husband’s royal pussy!”

My thought exactly; she didn’t need to ask me twice.

“How do you want—” I stopped in surprise as her tongue traveled the length of my cock.

“Fast, that’s how.” She was grinning as she raised her head. “We don’t have time for foreplay. Gloam’ll notice we’re missing before long.”

Twilight had turned away from me, presenting her pleasant purple princess plot for peremptory penetration. I gave a lick and climbed aboard.

Fore hooves on her back, ready to enter, I paused for one second longer.

“Consent check?”

“Yes!” She was laughing and exasperated. “I consent! Do it, do it, do whatever, just do it now.”

I did.

One day earlier it had been her dick exploding in me, and as pleasure instantly demolished every vestige of coherent thought I realized how little it mattered which of us took which role, so long as it was us, only us, us together forever, I was dizzy with delight, whirled without end, amen.

Twilight quivered beneath me, suppressing an orgasmic whinny as my brain melted.

I could only hope that ‘practically instantaneous’ was not too fast, at least not this time; I asked her as much.

“I did say fast, didn’t I?” she asked, chuckling beneath me. “I have no complaint.”

“Twi’,” I whispered, still sprawled across her back, breathing hard in her ear, “what’s that?”

In the dim shadows something was moving towards us.

“Gastwight,” Twilight said. “Only slightly dangerous, I’ll try to scare it away.”

Before she could squeeze off a warning spell the gastwight fell dead – behind it stood our daughter.

“Sheesh, I can’t take you two anywhere,” she said, stepping around the fallen creature as I scrambled off her father. “Zecora gave me a knife, can I keep it?”

Gloam proudly led the way back to Zeccora’s home. Twilight followed her through the shadows and I followed last.

Admiring her from behind I reflected that she had said ‘whatever’.

Nootle!

—

In the morning Zecora was a bit salty about the death of a semi-tame monster, but after apologies, she told us about her gift to Gloam.

“Though this is a little blade,
with desert skill it has been made,
you will find it has a bite,
at meal time, or in a fight.”

In daylight the flat of the blade had a patterned effect, almost like a zebra’s stripes.

‘Twas carried once by my grandsire,
and bears the name, ‘the kiss of ire’,”

Zecora further elaborated as Gloam showed off her treasure.

Twilight said that Gloam was old enough to start carrying a blade and we let her keep the knife.

—

When it was time to leave Ishaz surprised everypony, telling us he would be staying with Zecora.

I drew him aside for a private conversation.

“What’s up, pone? I know we think that she’s the one based on Aphrodite’s sign. But you don’t want to rush things.”

“The timing is perfect, she’s traveling to Zebronica in just a couple days. She says anypony with stripes can apply for the Right of Return to become a citizen. Eh, permanent stripes.” He looked over at Gloam. Her coat would probably be back to normal before we reached Ponyville, her temporary stripes from last night were already fading. “Then as a Zebronican citizen I can stay in Equestria as Zecora’s employee under her resident alien warrant. But I’ll be sleeping in her storage hut for now, you’re right, I don’t want to rush this.”

“May the holy one bless you, Ishaz. I hope this works out.”

“It’s gonna, sis— eh, I mean, ‘bro’. I can feel it. I believe.”

“Good.” I grinned, raising a hoof to bump his. “Make sure to call on the Fluttercord, they live just outside the forest. You know Discord; his fiancé, Fluttershy, is a real sweetie. Mild and quiet, but if you threaten one of her friends she will rip your spine out through your nose and sodomize you with it.”

“Sounds like a darling. Discord told me a little about himself before she tamed him, so I have some idea what she is capable of.”

—

Tanna, Twilight and Gloam disappeared down the forest road; Ishaz followed them with his eyes until they were gone.

Zecora watched him carefully.

“Do you suffer the pang of regret?
If you wish to run after, it is not too late yet.”

“No, no regrets. I am so overwhelmed, I don’t even know who or what to swear by. But I affirm by my own self integrity that I will never regret this choice.”

“Then, my new zebra friend,
this day hard at work we spend,
another long day, and then we rest,
and then to travel east from west.”

“Is it far to Zebronica, Zecora? I know nothing about this world.”

There was so much to learn.