I told you to go right

My sexual urges satisfied, I had a rather invigorating/almost stupidly cold shower alongside Luna, who, of course, was loving every moment of the cooling splashes. The water ran slowly down her neck, as she gently hummed Rick Astley to herself in the knowledge that the water we were showering with would probably curdle and turn into urine due to how much of a PISS-take the song was. (Badum-tsst.)
"Lulu," I shivered, "W-Why is the water so cold?" Luna stoppes humming, and chuckled warmly, warmer than the water at least.
"Well, since you're so worked up over nothing, I figured that you could use a cold shower." she replied, running a hoof up my neck to my chin. "And anyway, you're probably over-heated from that sexcapade. What better way to remove my heat than to have none of the heat?"
"Y-You're in h-heat?" I asked, teeth chattering away.
"Not yet, that comes later. After Hearth's Warming, Winter Wrap-Up, and my birthday!" she giggled, before booping my nose. "Boop." In reply, I took a hoof, and put it behind her head.

"Beep hoop, Lulu." I replied, before kissing her on the forehead. "Beep boop."

"Lulu?" I asked, looking into the empty cupboard that only contained my tattered old hat, and my blood, piss, dirt, ripped, and smoke-stained coat.
"Yes, dear?" she replied from the bathroom, in the manner of a wife talking to her husband as they both prepared for a night out.
"What happened to my clothes?"
"Those? Bluebollocks came in, took everything except the 'infected hat and disgusting coat', and went out to blast it apart with an RPG."
"What a dickhead..." I groaned.
"Don't worry," she called, "I got revenge by putting Griffonian Viagra into his dinner that evening. Needless to say, he came knocking on my door and asking me to relieve him."
"And?" I smirked, putting the two clothing items on.
"I gave him a copy of Playcolt and told him to go fuck himself, literally." laughed Luna. "And don't worry about clothes for the wedding: your friend Rarity's coming up here to make suits before the wedding, since she also needs to take the bride's measurements. I doubt it'll take her very long to make you a suit."
"Depends if she wants to." I answered back, looking into the mirror on the cabinet. "She'll be 'busy' with Fire Trail, if you catch my drift."
"I do." she sighed. "And don't worry about it. They'll probably have gotten over it."
"I hope to hell you're right. I don't play a full house, their ace high'll give me the boot."
"Speaking of boots," Luna said, all of a sudden behind me and leaning on my back playfully. "Look what that Six Shot mare left for you." The sound of magic was heard as I began floating upwards a few feet. Something was put on my hooves, and I was lowered down again. Looking down, there was a pair of slightly furry, brown, buffalo-skin boots, with steel toe-capping. Ha, Thunder's Tooth Kicker. Fuck your Teufort Tooth Kicker.
"Wow." I whistled, giving a few bounces on the spot, the boots clinking slightly. "Warm, my feet are sweating already, and they make me look like a psychopath. I love 'em. I'll go thank Six later." Before I could turn for the door, I was gripped in an external field, picking me up, spinning me round, and leaving me hanging in front of Luna's slightly irritated face.
"Which also reminds me: you haven't been trying it out with that mare, have you?" she asked sternly.
"What? No!" I replied quickly, raising my hooves in defence. "I'd never date another mare unless I had confirmed my relationship with the first marefriend was over. Ours isn't, and I didn't know, so I did nothing." Luna glared at me, before sighing and letting me drop to the floor with a clink.
"Well, I hope not, for your and her sake." Luna growled. For that moment, I was genuinely terrified. I thought she was going to kill me. "You trot along to breakfast now." she said, ushering me away.
"Wait, it's still breakfast?" I asked, confused and slightly shocked. "What time did you wake me up?"
"Umm..." Luna paused, looking into her head for the answer, "...4-5 o'clock? Something along those lines."
"Well, what time does your sister usually come to rape our ears with Rick Astley?"
"...6:15, I believe. That shower didn't take very long, but the sex di-"
Thud thud thud.
"Luluuuuuuu! Time for breakfast!" sang Celestia. I nodded to my marefriend, and trotted quietly to the door, placing my ear against it. When I could hear Celestia put hers against it and lean all her weight on it, I withdrew and opened the door.
"GENTLEMEN." I proclaimed in a slight french accent, loudly and proudly, pointing a hoof to the rising sun through the window. Celestia nearly had a heart-attack, falling straight onto the floor with an adorable squeak of surprise. She panicked, flailing around on the floor, before she stopped, staring at my boots. Slowly, her eyes moved up to stare me in the face, her smile getting warmer the further she went.
"Thunder?" she sighed, standing up. "It's good to see you again."
"Aye." I replied. "And FYI?" I whispered, gesturing for her to lean down. I went to her ear. "You're a terrible Spy, Princess Fallonthefloorafterplacingmyearagainstadoor."
"You too, you too." she giggled, happily accepting my hoof shake.
"Actually, I'm a better at stealth than you'll ever be." I replied sharply. "For instance, you might notice I am now wearing your Royal Neckalce and Crown, having taken them right from you when you were looking at me." I gestured to the golden crown and necklace around my neck and on my head. The two were promptly levitated off my small form, and Celestia groaned loudly.
"Not my fault you're so easy to mug." I chuckled as Luna trotted out of the door. "And beside, it's also not my fault your regalia looks weird when it's on Lulu, and vice versa." And, for the second time in a few seconds, I had taken the goddess' regalia, and changed it for her sister's.
"That'll be enough, Thunder." Celestia muttered.
"I win, Trollestia."
"[censored]."
"Goddamn."
"I win, beeyatch."