The Joker and The Rose.

= The next morning =

As i was lying on the floor, my eyes closed, i suddenly heard two voices singing. I opened my eyes and looked up towards the cell opposite me. What i saw was Ramon with a banjo in his paws, leaning towards the wall separating his cell from Tony's, who was on the opposite side also leaning on the wall.

They stopped singing, Ramon noticed me looking.

"Aah, desnudo has awoken!" He said.

I sat up on the straw bed, looked at the duo and failed to comprehend something.

"Where did you get the banjo?" I asked Ramon.

"This? The guards gave it to me. They thought it might lighten the mood." His claws plinging on the strings.

"You know how to play it?" I asked again.

"Not really, but its not that hard." his claws kept dancing over the strings.

That was awfully nice of the guards to give him a banjo, i would have asked the guards to give me "Anastasia" but i need amplifiers if i want to utilize her full power, and i don't honestly think they have one of those on board, Oh well.

The guards came and went with breakfast. This time it was some kind of wheat porridge with half a loaf of bread and a jug of milk.

After breaking my fast on this basic but filling meal, i removed my shirt, rolled up my pants to my thighs, and started doing a basic workout session, one i did everyday in the morning to keep myself fit. Simple push-ups and sit-ups followed by light stretching made sure i didn't turn into a couch potato. It also gave me some queer looks from Ramon.

"The heck are you doing Ah-temis." Ramon asked, his accent didn't really allow for him to say my name correctly.

"What does it look like i'm doing?" I asked Ramon, who despite his buff body structure didn't seem to know about basic exercise training.

"Dunno Esé, but it looks pretty darn silly." Ramon barely managed to restrain a fit of laughter.

"This is called exercising Ramon, maybe you should try it." I replied.

"Nah i'm good Ah-temis, the only training i used to do was with my claws and a log hanging from the roof in a chain."

"And how was that training?" I asked in between push ups.

"Well what i did was i practiced hitting it and smacking it around, basic combat training with my claws." Ramon said.

"Sounds simple enough, so you got some combat training, that might come in handy if we want to get off this ship before we reach Canterlot." I finished my workout and put on my shirt.

I suddenly heard Catalina exclaim something from her cell.

"Hold on there a minute! Who be saying that we gonna jump ship!?" She sounded slightly aggravated.

"I am saying it. I don't know about you guys but i am not thrilled about meeting Queen Princess Celestia. Something about being an omnipotent goddess that has the power to move the sun rustles my jimmies in a very 'id rather not have her smite me down against the pavement' sort of way." I emphasized my point by rustling my pants, making them roll out to my feet again.

"I agree with Artemis." Tony chimed in. "I am done with this place."

I looked at Ramon. His face showed that he was conflicted about the idea. But finally he also agreed. "Yes, we should definitely escape before we reach Canterlot, but i be thinking we take over the ship, dump the ponies somewhere and sail away before reinforcements get here."

"Great idea, i'll come up with some way of getting us out of these cells." I started examining the bars to check for any kind of weakness.

"Hehe, Ah-temis, if you figure out a way to get out of here, i will let you captain the ship." Ramon said. Tony agreed on it.

"I'll hold you two to that." i said as i checked the bars for rust.

"Hold on there a minute, don't i get a say in the matter?" Catalina said.

"Well you have two choices, either you help us escape and it will go much easier, or you don't help us and we still escape." i started jerking the handle to the cell door to check for rust there.

"Well... if you put it that way. I guess i have no options then." Catalina replied.

As i went on with investigating the cell to check for any means of escape i heard a door open and close at the end of the hallway. The sound of hoof steps echoed through the cells.

"Somebody be coming." Ramon said in a hushed tone.

I stopped and sat down on the straw bed pretending to knit a few straws together. I could hear how it went dead quiet in the other cells.

The pony stopped outside my cell and turned to me.

"You, walk over to the far wall and face it with your arms behind your back." The guard said.

I did as he was told. I heard how the door to my cell opened and the pony approached. I felt a pair of cuffs slid onto my wrists and lock with a click.

The pony led me out of the cell without a word. Two other ponies were waiting in the hallway. They put a bag over my head and lead me away from the cell area.

After being led through countless of corners, hallways and doors that i kept banging my head against the top off i found myself sitting on a chair. The bag went off my head as i was blinded by the brightness of the room. They chained my right hand to the table, enough so that i can still move it around but i wouldn't be able to leave the room. I looked around and figured out that i must be in the great cabin of the ship, the large glass windows covering one side of the wall showing the landscape below, we were up in the air. Opposite the wooden desk sat the large silvery pony from before.

"Oh, you again." I bluntly stated.

"Yes, me again. We didn't really get the chance to talk before." The pony said.

"No we didn't, for some reason you guys decided to take a nap when i got up from the hole and only after i got back from the tunnel i-" The pony cut me off.

"Storm would you kindly show the guest our appreciation for what he did back there." The pony looked behind me.

"Whut?" I was about to turn my head around and look when i felt something grabbing it and slamming me forehead first against the wooden table. The sound echoing off the walls.

"Oohf... aah." I raised my head up again and held my right hand on the temple trying to stop the ringing.

I saw from the corner of my eye how the magenta mare that kicked me before back in the den walked around to my left side of the table.

"Bit of advice, never start with the head, it makes you all groggy and you can't feel the rest-" I was cut off by the mare slamming down her hoof on my left hand.

I felt nothing from that one. "See?" i looked back on the large silver one.

"So what are you exactly." The large pony asked.

I decided it was time to make this pony lose his shit.

"Human. Place of origin: Tellus. Population: Just over 7 billion individuals. Us humans are known for being war mongering, self absorbed, arrogant creatures of mass destruction. We possess technological advancements that you couldn't possibly hope to understand.-" I leaned forward and looked the pony in the eyes. "- We could destroy this world a million times over and there ain't jack shit that you or that 'Sun goddess' Celestia can do about it." I smiled as i saw the face of the pony empty of all colour. Which wasn't much, granted that he was practically gray from the start.

My head was slammed down into the table again by that FUCKING MARE!

"Like we actually gonna believe that?" She said.

I felt how blood was filling my mouth, along with something hard moving around. I reached into my mouth with my right hand and grabbed the small object. i took it out and saw that it was a tooth.

'Oh now that bitch be dead.' i thought.

I ran my tongue along my teeth to check which tooth was off. It had been the first premolar tooth to the right on my lower set of teeth that had been knocked out. I'll check with a dentist later to get a replacement. If these cretins even have such a thing as oral hygiene.

I felt a trickle of blood running down from my mouth, i wiped it away with my hand and saw that it was completely black, 'well that's strange, last time i checked humans have red blood.' i thought to myself.

I looked at the two ponies in front of me, "Can i have my one phone call?" I asked them both.

The marecunt (Yes i will forever call her that and there is nothing anybody can do about it.) was standing on her back legs, leaning her left foreleg on the table and the right hoof on her hip. She looked behind her at the silvery stallion. "Do you know what the heck a phone call is?" She asked.

The silver stallion who had his front hoofs crossed and elbows resting on the table, was looking at me with an interested look.

"I haven't got the slightest clue." He replied.

'Oh right, i guess they don't have any form of modern technology in this world. At least not what i picked up from my cousin. They did have trains though, i guess that is a bit of relief.' I thought. That was going to cause some problems.

"Tell me your name 'Human'" The stallion practically spat the last word.

"You can call me Artemis. I would shake your... hoof, but." I rattled the cuffs that held my right hand captive close to the table.

"Yes i can see how that is a bit of a problem." The stallion said with a mocking smile.

I looked back and forth between the stallion and the marecunt. "Now, i can imagine you two trying to pull the 'good cop, bad cop' thing, but since you told your little... pet-" I pointed at the marecunt "- to slam my head against the table, i get the feeling that neither of you are playing the good cop, amirite?" i looked at them both.

The marecunt turned to the stallion. "Can i smack his head against the table again?" She asked.

"No, i think he gets the idea." The stallion leaned back on the chair. "Now tell me Artemis, whats up with the black blood? I guess its connected with why Storm's magic couldn't affect you." He asked.

"Oh i would love to tell you about that but first, *Cough cough* Could i have a glass of water?" I asked them with a dry voice.

"Well, sure." He gestured towards the guard. The pony put a glass on the table and poured water into it with a jug. The water was crystal clear. I picked up the glass of water and moved it close to my mouth. I looked up from the glass towards the stallion and grinned.

"Wanna to see a magic trick?" I asked.

--- Ramon ---

"You think they killed him?" Tony asked.

"Naah, they probably just took him for questioning. Tho i wonder what they be wanting from him." I looked towards the door at the end of the hallway. Suddenly i could hear some shouting from behind the door.

"Stop right there criminal scum! You-" The voice was cut off by the sound of slashing as the voice screamed about something being stuck in its knee. The door flung open and one of the guard ponies flew down the hallway in a spray of blood. As the body landed on the floor bouncing comically i noticed how a great gash from the neck to the flank covered the entire left side of the pony.

"Hory fucking sheet!" I exclaimed as i looked back at the door and saw Artemis standing there, covered in blood, panting and holding a broken drinking glass in his right hand.

I saw how Artemis started walking down the hallway, he picked up a key chain from one of his pockets and threw it to me, thankfully it wasn't covered in pony blood. I quickly unlocked the door to my cell and did the same on Tony's and Catalina's cells. Artemis had reached the end of the hallway, he turned around and looked back at us. We just stood there looking at him.

I saw how he took a deep breath, like he was about to say something. But instead he just started coughing like crazy. After recovering from his coughing fit he finally said. "Sorry, my throat is a bit parched, i'm still slightly thirsty."

I emptied my lungs of air, i noticed just now that i had held my breath the entire time, i took another breath.

"Okay Ah-temis." I turned around and pointed at the possibly dead pony. "What the fuck!" I turned back, facing him.

Artemis looked at the pony like he hadn't known of its existence until now and simply stated. "Oh right, sorry he was in the way and wouldn't let me pass. So i violently stabbed him with this." He held up the broken piece of glass like it was the greatest trophy he had ever received. He was smiling very proudly.

Tony leaned in and whispered in my ear, "He is quite resourceful this one."

I whispered back, "Yeah, and completely crazy."

Artemis started walking back down the hallway, passed us and continued down towards the door. The three of us followed him. When he passed the practically gutted pony a slight moan could be heard coming from its mouth. Artemis tapped the pony in the side with his foot and said; "Oi! Shut up, You are supposed to be dead! At least have the decency to be quiet when you are dying."

Artemis stopped at the end of the hallway in the doorway. He then turned back to us. "Okay guys, here is the plan: I am pretty sure that in a bit of a rage i kind of butchered everybody on this floor of the ship. We need to find the armory, get some weapons and then take over the ship."

"I'm down with that." Tony said.

"No complaints here." Catalina joined in.

The two of them looked at me. I sighed.

"Okay, we go with Ah-temis plan." I said.

"Yosh!" Artemis clapped his hands together. "Lets start a mutiny people!" He said.