The Conversion Bureau: Signal

The world tasted like purple. This was apparently normal.

“Ah…auhff….”

His eyes hurt and he screwed them shut, and he heard a gasp before the lights were turned down.

“Why do my eyes hurt?” he choked out.

He sensed someone come closer to him.

“You’ve never used them before. Please, take a moment and relax.”

The pain receded somewhat, and he relaxed, but did not open his eyes. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Everything felt numb. In his waking delirium, he heard a pen click and some papers shuffling.

“Hello. My name is Dawn Shimmer. Can you tell me your name?”

He was silent for a moment, processing the question. The voice was feminine and gentle.

“My name…” he murmured, “is Fred. Fred Buchannan. Doctor Fred Buchannan.” His voiced sounded wrong.

Dawn said nothing at first, and he heard the sound of the pen scratching on paper.

“Very good, sir. Now, what’s the last thing you remember? Please, take your time.”

He did. He could think now, but it was a little slow going. At least he thought it was. He shifted on whatever he was laying on – a bed? – noted how weak he felt. At least it was comfortable.

“I was… in a waiting room, reading a book. I heard them call my name and say the conversion apparatus was ready and the signals were clear. I went in, saw the computers and the other equipment. My handler, Dr. Fairbanks, walked me through the procedure first. Then she asked me if I was sure I wanted to do this, and I said yes and signed the final waiver…” He paused. “My body’s dead, isn’t it?”

The other voice made an uncomfortable sound, then replied, “Yes. I’m sorry.”

He tried to shrug but still felt too tired.

“They told me that would happen… can I have some water?”

“Of course, just a moment.”

There was the sound of clopping fe- no, hooves, as Sky Shimmer walked away. He heard her return, and felt something pressed against his lips – plastic, and then cool water. He drank greedily and his throat felt better.

“Are you ready to continue?”

“Yeah. So after finishing the last of the paperwork, they hooked me up. Had to cut into my brain and set everything, ran a few diagnostics. Had me on an anesthetic. They were talking to someone else – I think you guys – and we got the all clear. Then…. Something. Everything faded like I was falling asleep, and then I was here.”

He heard the sound of Dawn writing once more, and an affirmative sound.

“Excellent. Now, Dr. Buchannan, just a few more questions. What is your degree in?”

Things were coming back to him a lot faster now.

“Genetics PhD, and I have degrees in biomedical engineering and metaphysical biology. Most of my work focuses on the human genome and making apparatuses to grow organs and such artificially.”

He opened his eyes, blinked, and focused on the figure before him.

She – he was certain it was a she – was an orange unicorn with a blonde mane. Her horn was glowing the color of sunlight, and there was a clipboard and pen floating in the air next to her, her blue eyes focusing on what she was writing. She looked at him and smiled.

“Everything seems to be in order, doctor. We’ll have a more in depth interview later this week to make sure you aren’t suffering rejection or regression, but for now you should rest.”

She stood up from her haunches and adjusted the blanket over him with her magic, but he held out his arm shakily. He noticed then that it was a fuzzy brown foreleg with hoof.

“Wait…. Ms. Shimmer. Can I see a mirror?”

Dawn Shimmer paused and stared at him, thinking, as if debating with herself.

“Are you sure? You really should just be resting now.”

“No. I want to see…. Best get it over with.”

A sigh.

“If you insist…. Before you look though, know that I – and everypo, er, everyone else, think you’re doing a very brave thing.” She turned away and went to the closet on the far well, fetching a mirror. She levitated it over and before Fred.

Fred Buchannan, PhD, stared at the figure. It was small and curled up in a bed far too large for it – him. A chestnut brown unicorn colt, a tiny horn sticking out of the messy red hair that was his mane. Fred gulped, as did the colt.

“They told me…. But I guess I didn’t really get it until now…”

He lay down and relaxed again, suddenly feeling even more tired. The blanket was drawn up to his neck and tucked around him.

“Get some sleep, Dr. Buchannan.”

He closed his eyes and the world faded out around him.

“…you can call me Fred.”