The Replacement Letters

Dear Princess you-know-who

What the thudge?! Pinkie Pie is the craziest flank of a mare I have ever had the displeasure of ever knowing. She believes she has the ability to see in the brief future with twitches and other feelings. When she claimed that a 'doozy' was coming, she lead me and some of my friends to almost get killed by a hydra, only to discover that the 'doozy' is nothing more than me saying that I believe in such crud. Plus her cooking is nasty, and her parties are for babies. All this Pinky sense nonsense has even put me in castes. Pinkie has a pet alligator, that she abused by pulling the poor thing's teeth out. Pinkie should stop with her childish behavior, quit that dump Sugarcube Corners, get a REAL job, or go to a psych ward. Course, the only job she's capable of is breaking rocks with her head.

Twilight Sparkle

PS: There's a hydra out there that needs to be hunted down and killed.