The Replacement Letters

Dear Celestia the goon

My so called 'friends' felt that I was acting with too much pride, so they pulled a vicious joke on me. I'm all for a little prank from time to time, but today they trampled on my reputation by becoming a 'superhero' to replace me. If they thought I needed an attitude adjustment then why didn't they TALK to me. I'm all ears, I would've listened, but NOOOO, they became Mare Do Well and made me look like a chump. Just because I'm the element of loyalty does NOT mean my friendship is unconditional; I don't want any part of them any more, they're a bunch of jerks. Anyway, I think we should do something about that death trap of a hill here in Ponyville, it almost claimed the lives of several ponies, that I had to save. Aren't I awesome?

I guess the only good thing to come out of this is that I got to give a baby a wedgie. I think I'll start giving babies wedgies more often, or for that matter, shove old ponies across streets, and if they whack me with their canes or purses I'll shove em' again.

Rainbow Dash

PS: Maybe I'll get my own Mare Do Well costume. That would be awesomer than awesome.