Chapters A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
''Why does everything have to be so difficult?''
Kevin was driving home from a long day of police work. He was a pretty good cop, if someone were to ask him.
But even though he was good, today was a total failure. He was planning on pulling some Hispanics off the road and talk to them for about half an hour, to see them become angry. However, there were no minorities on the road, so he did it to other people instead.
Unfortunately, Kevin’s idea of humor was lost on the people he pulled over. Apparently at least one person complained about it, and now there is an investigation to find out if he abused his power. He didn’t think he did, but odds are next Monday he would probably get canned. He may have been a good cop, but he still had a bad reputation.
Hey, nobody said that being a cop is great. Far from it, in fact.
He parked his car in front of his mansion after leaving the police station. He stepped out of his car and observed his home for a moment, taking in its splendor.
Well Kevin, you have it made . A job with power and authority, a lot of money and a grand house.
He did not have a wife, nor did he want one. He was a twenty-five year old guy with money bursting from his pockets. He could date anyone he wanted. Why settle one girl if you could have four?
He never understood people who got married. Why would someone want to bind himself to one woman? That was the worst thing that could happen, according to Kevin.
Kevin walked up to his front gate, which had a voice recognition, a nice bonus he bought when purchasing the mansion. It was a simple touch screen device attached to the gate, with small green lines on it that lit up when Kevin said something. Kevin walked up to the device, touched a few things on the device, said his passphrase and walked inside his front yard. A short walk later, and Kevin was in his own home. He kicked his shoes out and plopped into the couch.
''Finally, now I can watch the latest episode of the ‘real housewives.’ ‘’Kevin looked around his living room to be certain he was alone.
No one can know about this.
As Kevin turned on the television, the first pictures of ‘Channel One News’ became clear on the screen... but something seemed off. The color seemed brighter than normal. He decided to let it go and just watch TV.
''Huh? What’s with his face?'' Kevin asked as he observed the anchorman, who was going through some odd facial reconstructions.
He suddenly grew a large fang, hanging out his mouth like a saber-tooth tiger. His brows became thicker, more bushy and turned into a pasty white color, while a goatee sprouted from his chin that was the same color as his brows. The eyes became larger, and the iris turned into a deep crimson while the white sclera turned bright yellow.
Suddenly, two large antlers grew from the top of his head, but they were different from each other. One looked like a regular deer antler, while the other looked like some horn out of a fairy tale.
''What the fuck is going on?!'' Kevin could only watch in curiosity and fear while the anchorman continued to chance in front of his eyes. One arm morphed into an eagle’s talon, while the other arm changed into a bear claw.
The suit suddenly became saggy around his sides, as if his chest was turning thinner...or maybe that mass was just shifting itself as his neck grew longer and his face unmistakably took the physical shape of a horse.
Finally, the transformation stopped, and Kevin spent a few seconds in shock before words began to fly from his mouth.
‘’What the fuck is going on?! This doesn't make any sense!'' Kevin tried to think if this was a joke from the channel, and if it was, he would definitely sew the station. He stopped thinking when he heard a voice speak up.
“Make sense? Oh, what fun is there in making sense?” The ‘anchorman’ responded, as if he had heard Kevin.
Kevin blinked, hoping he was just hearing things, and the news set background in the TV completely vanished, leaving only a black void. The strange creature that transformed from the anchorman stood out easily against the darkness. Kevin finally realized that this creature looked like a Frankenstein project gone wrong, with parts made up of multiple different animals.
They wore a sinister smile on their face, and Kevin could feel his eyes focused solely on him.
''What are you?'' A very confused Kevin asked.
“Oh, silly me. I forgot to introduce myself.” --he bowed, but it appeared mocking instead of genuine-- “My name is Discord, Master of Chaos.”
There was something about him that sent chills down Kevin’s spine. Maybe it was how he spoke, possible something in his tone of voice, but there was something...evil about him.
However, before Kevin could think about anything else, as Discord began speaking again.
“I have followed you for a few days now, and I know what you truly desire. You’re a man that just wants to have fun!” Discord said with a smirk present on his face. He had Kevin where he wanted him, and Discord knew it, because Kevin was now listening intently to Discord’s words.
“But the best way to have fun...is when you have power , and I believe that you are the ideal candidate to receive this WONDERFUL surprise!”
Receiving power in order to be entertained? It seemed a bit silly to Kevin. He already had power and authority, but he reminded himself that would go away soon enough.
And if this “Discord” creature is offering a different kind of power, what reason did Kevin have to refuse? It could be another chance to have fun, so hell, why not?
Discord dramatically continued, “I can give you immense power, enough to alter the very fabric of reality as you know it! Now, do you accept my generous offer?” Discord extended his lion’s paw out toward Kevin on the television.
A few seconds of silence passed before Kevin burst into a fit of laughter. At first he thought the whole “power” thing was intriguing, albeit ridiculous, but now? Now this all sounded insane!
''Okay, where is the hidden camera? Because there is no one who can change reality.'' Kevin didn’t even finish his sentence before whole his house started to spin around. Kevin fell off the couch and quickly dodged the table before it smashed against him. He then watched while the table changed into smoke and disappeared. As quickly as it began, it stopped and everything fell on the ground.
''No one can change reality?'' Discord asked in a mocking way.
Okay, so he is serious. Kevin thought before standing up.I need to choose my words thoughtfully, to make sure I don’t piss him off.
''So, Discord was it?'' Kevin stated. ''I have just one question: why are you here?'' Kevin asked him.
Discord suddenly flew out of the TV and stood in the living room while having a reading glasses on and a piece of parchment in his hands. He started to speak really dignified, something that sounded as fake as the promise he made to Kevin.
''If you just sign here, here and here, and you get all the power you want.''
''All the power I want? And you are serious? Hmm, I like that. But what will happen exactly? How will it work?''
Discord started laughing. “You humans, always wants to know how things work. Let me explain so that you can understand. I snap my fingers, use the spell, and you are powerful. Simple as that.'' He then held out his lion paw, which contained the scroll, out to Kevin while giving him a quill with this eagle talon before saying, ''Do we have a deal?”
Kevin looked at the hand and started thinking. Can I trust him? Probably not, but all the power I want, I need to say yes to that. Just imagine if he DOES speak the truth and I don’t accept! Then again, I have the feeling he’s lying.
Discord impatiently tapped his tapped his leg with the hoof on the ground.
‘’If you don’t want it, then I will just go and-’’
‘’No wait, let me think about this,’’ Kevin hurriedly said to Discord.
‘’Make your decision now, or I’m gone,’’ Discord said, annoyed.
Kevin looked at Discord for a few seconds while thinking before Discord spoke again.
‘’I’m gone.’’
Before Discord did anything, Kevin reached and grabbed the scroll out of his paws. As soon as Kevin drew his signature, the scroll disappeared.
Suddenly a white light came from Kevin's hand and had taken over his body, so that whole the room was shining in bright white light. For Kevin, it felt like a someone had just injected him with steroids. Then the light became brighter and brighter until Kevin needed to close his eyes to prevent him from becoming blind. Then all the light erupted into a loud boom. Kevin opened his eyes to see that he was in another room now. The room was not very big, around 6 by 6 metres, and in the middle were a lot of big pillows. At the left side were some bookcases and a bureau with a very old computer and printer. There was one bed on the right. Kevin then noticed that the room was not square, but oval-shaped. He then noticed that there was one exit, which was a door.
''Okay, where am I? You know what, doesn't matter. I just go,'' Kevin said to no one in particular. Kevin tried opening the door, to find it locked. He pulled out with all his power, to find that it did not open.
''Goddammit!'' Kevin then noticed his clothes. WHAT THE FUCK?! His clothes changed into some kind of Arabian genie clothes. It kinda looked like this
''The fuck?''
''Ahh, so I see that you have discovered your new set of clothes,'' a voice said that Kevin knew all too well. Suddenly Discord stood in the room.
''Where am I?'' Kevin started to become angry. Why had Discord brought him here?
''Oh, this is your new house,'' Discord said.
''WHAT!?''
''This is your new-''
''I heard you the first time. But why is this my new house?''
''Alright, let me explain. I told you that you could have as much power as you wanted. Well, that's true, but with limits,'' Discord began, ''because now you are a genie. And as a genie, you have all the power you want, but also have to fulfill the wishes of your master.''
''You didn't tell me THAT!''
''I didn't want to spoil the surprise,'' Discord said while laughing.
''Does this mean that this is my lamp?'' Kevin asked Discord.
''Someone can view it like that, yes.''
''So now I need to fulfill three wishes for my master every time I get out of here?!'' Kevin asked angrily.
''Oh no, you got it wrong. Your masters have unlimited wishes.''
''WHAT!!!!''
''And this is not really a lamp you see.This is the inside of one of the Elements of Harmony. And you are not on your own universe anymore. This is Equestria. And there are six Elements of Harmony, and you will fulfill as many wishes as they want.''
''No no no no no....... Serious?''
''Eyuppe,'' Discord said.
''But don't worry, you don't have to wait months before they free you. They will probably get you out in a few hours. Well, arrivederci,'' Discord said before a white flash was seen and he was gone, leaving a book in his place. Kevin walked to the book and read the cover.
''The Rules of Wishing: A basic guide on becoming a Proper Genie.''
''This can't be happening. This can't be happening.'' Kevin said while picking up the book and started to read.
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A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
seeing.... Ponyville? Serious now, what's it called?..... are you serious?
seeing.... Ponyville? Serious now, what's it called?..... are you serious?
The ponies were on the train back to Ponyville while wearing there elements.
''Now we can wish for everything!'' Rainbow said to the others. ''I am gonna wish that I become captain of the wonderbolts.'' Rainbow said before looking to no point in particularly with dreaming eyes.
''Ohh, and i'm gonna wish that I get a lot of new gems for my dresses.'' Rarity said
''And I will-''
''Girls, I don't think that it is smart to wish those things right now.'' Twilight said. ''From what I have heard from genies, they can be very tricky and on purpose misunderstand your wishes, and they give you something that you don't want to have. I think that we first need to wish some smaller things before starting with big wishes.''
''Like something to drink?'' Pinkie asked
''Yes, that will be a good wish.''
''Because I'm very thirsty right now.'' Pinkie added
''Then conjure him. There are no other ponies in the train, so go ahead. Just expect him to be angry'' Twilight said to Pinkie
Pinkie looked at her element and said the sentence:
''Genie, come out''
Suddenly there was a light flash and Kevin stood there, dressed in some kind of artist robes while looking at a piece of paper he was holding.
''No no no, the curtains have to be black, otherwise it will not go with the carpet.'' He looked around him and saw that he was no longer in his room. He then noticed the ponies looking at him.
Switching over to perspective of Kevin
''Oh, hello masters. As you can see , I was busy redecorating my new house.'' I said before letting the piece of paper disappear. Man, I loved my powers. Lets just change back into normal clothes. I conjured magic glitterstuff (that's how I call it) that was circling around my body, and changed me into the clothes I as a genie. These clothes are not my kind of clothes, but this was the dress code for a genie when fulfilling wishes. When I was done, I started talking
''You know, I can't wait till it is finished. It will look FABULOUS!'' I then realized what I said. ''I mean, uhh, it will look nice.'' said while trying to come over as nonchalant as I could. I may be in a land of colorful ponies, I still need to protect my manliness. I then noticed that they looked at me like I was some kind of weirdo. Maybe I am
''Uhh, is something wrong?''
''Aren't you angry'' the purple unicorn asked (bydeway, I don't think that there is a girlish-er sentence than that)
''O, I was angry, and still am angry at your princess. But I am not gonna freak out about this and become such a mean guy. Like my mother told me, if something happens that you don't like, don't become all angry about it. Just let it slide. But do you have a wish or anything like that?''
''Yes, I do, I do!'' the pink pony said while bouncing up and down. Did she have to much sugar or anything like that? My god, what a energy.
''Alright, but before you start, I need to tell to you all that there are a few wishes that I cannot do. That is just beyond my power, or against the rules.''
''Rules?'' the lavender colored unicorn asked me
''I summoned the book that I read when I arrived in the element. ''Yes, this book goes into detail.'' I said before levitating the book to the purple unicorn.
''It's basically four rules,'' I began ''the first rule is, I can't kill someone.'' I said while slicing open my throat with my index finger and my head fell on the floor looking at the ponies before saying: ''I can't do it.'' with made sure that all six were screaming. Hey, don't look at me like that. It was funny. I picked up my head and putted it back on my body, before spinning it hard and letting him stand normal again.
''Second, I can't make someone fall in love with you.'' At the end I summoned up a big heart that I let explode in multiple smaller hearts before those smaller hearts disappeared.
''Third, I can't bring someone back from the dead.'' I said before summoning more glitterstuff from my hand palms and shot it to the ground, making some pony appear were the ears fell of and blood was coming from his mouth. ''Its not a pretty sight, AND I WON'T DO IT!'' After that I made the pony disappear with my glitterstuff.
''And last but not least, I can't fulfill any wishes that change my way of life for good.''
''Huh, what do you mean with that?'' A white unicorn asked me
''Well, for instance, if I would listen to a kind of music that you don't like, then you can't wish that I never listen to that music again. You CAN wish, however, that I will not listen to that music on that moment, but not that I will listen to it again.''
''And now that you know what the rules are, you had a wish, go ahead.''
''I wish that I had something to drink.'' the pink pony said.
Is this serious? I can do everything with my magic, and she wants a drink? Okay! Wait, she did not say what she want to drink.
''And what did you want to drink, master.'' I asked her
''Lemonade is good. And my name is Pinkie Pie, not master, you silly.'' You've got to be kidding me. She is called Pinkie Pie? For real? Later you are going to tell me that the one with the rainbow colored hair is called rainbow! I snapped my fingers and conjured a little cloud. I then made a glass appear, and I let the the cloud rain lemonade in the glass, and then I gave the glass to Pinkie.
''Here you go.''
''YAY!'' pinkie said before accepting the glass. My god, is there anything more cute than that...... did I seriously thought that, what is wrong with me?
''Does anybody else want some lemonade?'' I asked the rest of them
''No, thank you, I'm good.''
''Me two.''
''And you three?'' I asked the the Twilight and the white unicorn and the rainbow colored one.
''We don't need anything, thank you.'' Twilight said. I shrugged and summoned a glass for me.
''Suit yourself.'' I said before letting it rain lemonade in my glass. When my glass was full, I used my glitterstuff to let the cloud disappear. I then sat down next to Twilight and looked out the window. Hey, where am I going actually?
''So, were are we going to.'' I asked asked to no one in particularly
''We are going back to Ponyville. That is a smaller village, further from Canterlot, the city were we just were.''
''O oka-... did I hear that correct? Ponyville?''
''Yes, do y'a know it?'' the pony with the hat asked me. At this point, I tried not to laugh at the name of the town. Seriously, who calls a town after the dominant species. Wait, are there more towns with this kinda names?
''How could I have heard of *pfhh*.... Ponyville? I am just 12 hours in this universe. But are there by any chances more cities?'' I asked them. If one village had the name of ''Ponyville'' then I wanted to know how other cities or villages were called.
''Well, we have Manehattan, Fillydelphia-'' They did not get further as I was already laughing like a madman about the pun ''Manehattan'' That was GENIUS! I ended up in a universe were all the city names are puns on names from MY world. I can see Discord having fun right now
''Why are you laughing?'' Twilight asked me.
''Haha, I'm sorry. Its just that your cities are like word jokes for me. Because in my world, we have a city called Manhattan, but because you are ponies, it is called Manehattan here. Its funny.''
''Okaaay.'' Twilight said to me while looking like I'm crazy. THIS is why I wanted the power in the first place. To fuck with peoples minds. Or ponies minds in this case. I sat down in one of the chairs and looked out of the window just relaxing and looking at the trees when I heard a loud gasp. I turned to see Pinkie standing still in mid air. The fuck, how does she do that? She then started to speak really fast, and I had no Idea what she said. After her speech, she looked at the others, who seemed to know exactly what she meant.
''Can you translate what she just said, Twilight?'' I whispered to Twilight
''She said that you still don't know most of our names.'' Twilight said in normal speaking voice. Well, thank you Twilight. There was a reason I whispered.
''Hey, wait a minute. I never told you my name. How do you know it?'' Twilight asked me
''Well, princess sunbutt called you like that before I was sucked back into this element.'' I said to her. She did not look pleased that I called her princess sunbutt.
''I wish that you call her princess Celestia from now on.'' Twilight said with a smirk on her face, thinking that I had to fulfill that wish.
''Your forgetting that you can't wish that.'' I said while laughing ''Do I need to tell you rule four again?'' I said to her. '''But because I like you so much, I shall try to call her by her real name.'' I said to Twilight.
''But now that I think about it, I don't know your names, except for yours and Pinkie Pie. What ARE your names?''
''Well, my name is Applejack'' The pony with the cowboy hood said
''My name is Rarity, Darling.''
I then noticed the yellow Pegasus with pink hair. I din't notice her until now. She seemed not really wanting to talk to me for some reason. So I asked Twilight what her name was.
''Ohh, that's Fluttershy. She is really shy around new people. Give her time and she will warm up to you.'' I then turned around with my head to look at the ponies again, only to get a jump scare because the cyan colored Pegasus flew before me.
''My name is Rainbow Dash, and I'm the fastest flier in all of Equestria.'' Now, I can say something about how she thought she was the best. Or the fact that she scared me so easily. But I am gonna mention her name. HER NAME!!! Looks like I was right that her name had to do something with the color of her hair. But come on! This is just to easy! RAINBOW dash? Seriously! I am not ven gonna make fun of her name in front of her, because this is so easy. But now its time to tell them my name.
''Okay, nice to meet you all, even though our first meeting was not very....pleasant. My name is Kevin, I'm 25 years old, I was a cop, until Discord tricked me and made made a genie. Don't think there is much else to say. Now, before I forget to ask, how long is this trip gonna take?''
''It will take about 3 hours from now before we arrive in Ponyville.'' Twilight said. Then suddenly she got a weird kind of look in her eye. Its that kind of look a loin has before hunting the antelope. ''And when we are there, I need to get paper, and then research begins.'' She said like she was mad. I at this point, was fearing for what she meant. But at the same time, I wanted to get out of this train. So lets get out of the train. I snapped my fingers, and a white flash came from my hand. When everypony looked up, they saw that that the train was already almost at Ponyville
''Wha-what happened?'' Twilight asked before looking around to make sure it was no illusion.
''I just used my magic to make the time go faster. Now we don't have to sit for tree hours, looking out some bored ass window.'' I said as the train was stopping at the station.
''But-but-but it takes giant masses of magic to pull a spell so powerful. How did you do this?''
I pointed at myself before saying: ''all powerful genie. Duh!'' at which I only got a grumpf from Twilight. They all stood up and started walking to the door with me talking to them.
''I am really curious how Ponyville looks. I hope it is not a to big town, as O MY GOD, MY FREAKING EYES!!!'' I walked out of the train, only for the brightest fucking colors to make me blind. Why is there that much colors?
''O my god, instant headache!'' I said as I conjured a sunglasses for my eyes. ''Pfew, that's better!'' I said to the ponies who were looking like I was crazy. Maybe you are crazy We started walking to Ponyville.
This. is. pure. TORTURE!! Only 5 minutes had passed since we walked to Ponyville, and Pinkie just didn't stop talking about a chimachanga, or something like that. How can someone talk THAT much? And about something that doesn't even exist! At least, I think it does not exist. I was trying my hardest to ignore her, but I was about to tell her to be quiet, when Rainbow (pfffh, rainbow. It's still funny) started speaking.
''We are in Ponyville.'' rainbow said. Thank god! One more moment listening at Pinkie, and I started to scream. I noticed that Ponyville was not very big, but looked nice. We walked into the town, and what happened next, was funny as hell. As soon as one pony saw me, she began to scream monster, while another pony started to scream ''the horror, THE HORROR!!'' while everyone(or pony) ran away and hide in their houses.
''Well, that went great.'' I said sarcastically
''Oh, buck! Didn't they learned their lesson with Zecora?'' Applejack asked
''I don't know who that is, but I suppose the answer is....no''
''Don't worry, when they know that you are not a monster, this will not happen.'' Twilight assured me. I know, and it will happen NOW I let my hands circle around to summon more glitterstuff. A whole load of it appeared and it flew into all the homes.
''What did you-'' I hold up my hand to silence Twilight
''Wait for it,'' I said. Suddenly loud screams could be heard. ''Bingo!'' I said. Then all the doors of the houses flew open, and all the ponies were floating in the air while in the grasp of my magic. They then all lined up in front of me while still screaming like their little lives would end. I used my magic to make my voice hundred time louder before screaming: SILENCE!!! And my god, this is priceless.They all stopped screaming immediately. I then gave myself my own volume again
''Okay, listen up because I am only going to tell this once.'' I started '' I am not a monster. I am not here to eat your children. I am not going to murder you in your sleep. I am a human, am 25 years, and my name is Kevin. Nice to meet you all.'' It seemed that the ponies in front of me lost some of their fear, but there were still scared looks, but not as much as first. I then snapped my fingers, and the glitterstuff disappeared, making sure that all the non-pegasi fell on the ground. I then turned to Twilight.
''Now they know that I'm not a monster. Lets get going.'' let me tell you one thing, the look you get of shock, is one of the best looks you can get, and I just got six of them. Genius! We all started walking again, but I had no idea to what we were walking
..............................................................................................................................................................................................
ten points for the person who gets the Aladdin reference
A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Don't know how to call this chapter
I already regretted getting whole the town together with my magic. Because it was 5 minutes later, and all I heard by now was Twilight nagging that I can't do things like that. My god, why was she being so BORING? It worked, right?
''-and that's why you can't do that!'' Twilight finally finished with her monologue.
''Hmm, did you say anything Twilight?'' I said to piss her off. It worked. It looked like she was going to explode. I love my job. I then saw them all walking to a very large tree. So I decided to follow.
''So, why are we walking to a tree?'' I asked to Rainbow
''That is the local library, and Twilight's home.''
''She lives in a tree?''
''Yes that's weird, right?'' Rainbow said to me
''Well pardon me, sugarcube, but don't you live in a house made of clouds?'' Applejack said with a large grin on her face
''She lives in clouds?'' I asked Applejack
''Yes that's weird, right?'' Applejack said before starting to laugh, and I tuned in, with a grumpy looking Rainbow Dash next to us. we then said goodbye to the others and went in the library, were I just remembered something horrible.
''Oh, no.... Gustave is alone in my sanctuary!'' I yelled
''Who is Gustave?'' Twilight asked
''He is the one I hired to help me with redecorating. But he likes the modern style a lot, and I don't like that! I have to stop him before he turns my sanctuary in what a disco out of the year 2542!'' I said before changing into smoke and being sucked in the crown thingy.
Out of Kevin's perspective
''He's weird.'' Twilight though
''Hay, Twilight. So you are back from stopping Discord?'' Spike said while coming out the kitchen. ''And did the princess reward you for it?''
''Well, we did got something, but I don't know if you can call it a great gift.'' Twilight said
''Oh, what did you get?'' Spike asked with enthusiasm. Then out of nowhere, a light flash came from the crown, and and Kevin stood in the room again.
In Kevin's perspective
''No worries, he did not change my plans. Do not panic, he made it look really nice, SO NO PANIC!'' I said to Twilight. I then heard a loud yell coming from behind me, and I saw a purple lizard, or something like that. And he was scared out of his mind.
''Well, hello there.'' I started. ''My name is Kevin, what's your name?'' I asked the thing
''M-my na-name is Spike.'' He started
''Hello, Spike. I am a genie, was a human, but that is a long story, and princess Trollestia said I need to be a genie until she says otherwise. Now, may I ask what you are?''
''I am a dragon.'' Spike said while looking very proud.
''Ehh, are dragons, I don't know, MUCH bigger?'' I asked him
''He is still a baby dragon.'' Twilight said.
''Okay, that explains it.'' I said before snapping in my fingers and conjuring a cloud to lie on. ''Ahh, this is nice..'' I then heard Twilight telling Spike that they still had to clean up the library after some kind of fight with her friends. I looked around to see that there were books everywhere. I then saw Twilight ans Spike picking up the books.
''You don't really know how this works, do ya?''
''How what works?'' Twilight asked. Oh, for the love of god I snapped my fingers, a bright light, and all the books where back on the shelves ordered by category and on alphabet.
''There you go.''
''I don't need your help with these things.'' Twilight said. Now, there is one thing you should know about me. I like singing. And because I like singing a lot, I watched a lot of Disney movies. And I knew that this was a moment for a Disney song. I snapped my fingers and let
Youtube Video
appear:
Well, I know you have your own magic
And the most unicorns do to
But you do not have to feel nostalgic
You’ll be sorry if you do
You got more power then you had before
You have more magic in your veins
With me at your side, you’ll never be poor
And that’s only one thing you can gain
Master Twilight, miss
What will your pleasure be?
I don’t really want to do this, but this isn’t about me
No no no
Life is your restaurant
And I’m your maître’d
Come on, whisper what it is you want
No, this ain’t about me
Yes miss, I don’t want to do this.
But your the boss about me
I swear, if these elements weren’t here,
I would throw you all into the sea
Your wish is my command
You have the upper hand
I’m not in the mood, cause I got screwed
But this isn’t about me
Oh no, ah ja ja
No no , ja ja ja
Oh no, ja ja ja
Papataptatipapa
Do you want this? Letting emeralds appear
Do you want that? Summoning a large basket of apples
Can you pull this, out your little hat Changing myself into a bunny
Can you go, poof Changing into myself
Hey looky here, ha Conjuring a large pile of bits
I bet you can’t go abracadabra, let things rip Duplicating myself
And then make everything disappear Snap in my fingers and everything I summoned disappeared
But you don’t gonna sit there, slight jawed with buggy eyes
You gonna let me answer all your prayers
You are my master, that’s what applies
Now your wish, is one of my cares
Now I have a powerful urge to help you
How’s that possible? I want to know
You have a list of three miles long, no doubt.
And now I gotta rub like so, hey ho
Master Twilight, miss, bet you got more a wishes then twenty three
I don’t want this job, prefer to be a cop
But this isn’t about, isn’t about
No this isn’t about, isn’t about.
No this isn’t about me at all.
No this isn’t about me at all.
POOF
and the music stopped and I was lying on a cloud with a large sign with ''applause'' and a dragon and a unicorn who looked like they just seen a madman. Maybe they did.
''How....how did you..... where did.....'' Twilight was stuttering. ''Alright, I really want to study your species now.''
Third person
What did I just see? How did he do that with the music and the special effects? Twilight thought.I have never seen anything like that kind of magic, except from Discord. I need to research this. Twilight turned around and started looking for paper and a quill with ink.
''Alright, I have the things, now lets..... where is Kevin?'' Twilight looked at the place where Kevin stood a few seconds back, to see it empty. ''Spike, do you know where Kevin is.''
''He is right over... huh, he was just there.'' Spike started looking for a place where Kevin could be, to hear a loud laughing coming from outside.
''Uh oh.'' Twilight said as she ran outside and to the sound of the laughing. What she saw there stunned her to the ground. Kevin was rolling over the floor laughing, while two unicorns were screaming. Well, unicorns might be big words. You could see the horns, yes. But everything else looked weird. The hind legs were changed into the legs of bears, while the front legs looked of that from a antelope. The eyes had the colors red and orange in them. They also seemed to have no mane, and instead of the normal fur, they had the spikes of a hedgehog.
''KEVIN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!'' Twilight yelled
''Oh, *laugh* hey Twilight *chuckle* what do you think of my *pfhh* creations?''
''Change them back, RIGHT NOW!!'' Twilight spoke. Smoke could be seen from her ears.
''Why? This is funny! And its their fault. They called me a monster, which I don't like to be called bydeway, so I changed them INTO monsters.''
''Okay, lets say differently. I wish that you change them back.''
''Ugh, your no fun at all.'' Kevin said before snapping his fingers while changing them back into ponies. On which the ponies ran away in fear.
''Your welcome!'' Kevin yelled after them ''Sheesh, some ponies, right?''
''You can't just change ponies in monsters!'' Twilight yelled
''Why not?''
''WHY NOT?!!'' Twilight closed her eyes and took some deep breaths.
''Because it's not nice to do. And when you know that other ponies don't like it, you should not do it.'' Twilight opened her eyes, to see Kevin holding another pony with his magic before picking up the mane like it was some kind of play dough.
''Hmm, did you say something?'' Kevin asked
''PUT IT BACK!!!'' Twilight yelled
''Put what back? You have to be clear with what you wish.'' Kevin said while grinning
''I WISH THAT YOU GIVE THE MANE BACK!!!''
''O, okay.'' Kevin said before trowing the mane back on her head and putting the pony down, before changing his face into that of a snake.
''NOW GET AWAY!'' Kevin slissed to the pony. And the pony ran away, while Kevin was laughing like a madmen. ''you ponies are so much fun.'' Twilight sighed.
''Lets get back to the library.'' Twilight said.
''Alright.'' Kevin said before a flash of light came from his body, and he transported to the library.
Kevin's perspective
Why did Twilight have to find me so quickly. I had so much fun with the monster ponies. But no, I had to change them back, and now I'm sitting in a library, looking at boring ass books. Now, don't get me wrong, I like reading. But NOT when I can do so much fun stuff with my magic.
How long will it take for Twilight to be back? If she isn't here in 5 minutes, I change Spike into a chicken. Oh, that will be funny. You know what, I'l do it right now. I flew up and was about to snap my fingers, when Twilight walked into the library. goddamit . I quickly flew down and leaned to the wall of the library.
''So now that you are here, I want to ask some questions about your world, if you are okay with that.''
''Do I really have a choice?'' I asked her, while already knowing the answer.
''No, but it sounds nicer if you ask somepony first.''
''Lets get this started then.''
My god, shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!!!! It was now 2 hours later, and she was still going on with the questions. Every time I thought we had handled everything, she thought of a complete other question, to start a whole bunch questions again. It was almost dark outside and she was STILL going on.
''And then I want to know what-''
''Oh, please, isn't this enough torture?! Is there no off button?''
''Pfh, you don't need to react so irritated.''
''I was irritated after question 87. Now i'm just desperate to stop this conversation.''
''Just a few more questions and we are finished. Now how-'' Twilight was interrupted by a few knocks at the door. ''Hmm, who could that be.''
''OHH, THANK YOU LORD!!!'' I screamed as I held my hands in the sky before changing into smoke and going into the crown.
A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
sleepover
''He did what?''
The main six were all in the library sitting with each other. Twilight totally forgot that they would have a sleepover for celebrating that their friendship was restored after Discord took it away. She also didn't notice that Spike was already gone to the CMC to stay for the night. All the questions distracted her. Twilight was now telling what Kevin did to the other ponies.
''He changed their body parts in the parts of other animals, while giving them the spikes of a hedgehog. And you know why? Because they called him monster!'' Twilight explained to the others.
''Ya know what's funny?'' Applejack asked the rest ''He hates Discord for tricking him, but he seems like the kind a guy who would do the same.''
''Hey, hey, don't we forget something?'' Pinkie asked the rest
''And what would that be, darling?'' Rarity asked Pinkie.
''Kevin is not here. Shouldn't he be here to?''
''Well, I don't think he would like a sleepover.'' Twilight stated. In truth, she had no idea if he would like it. But seeing that he wasn't the nicest company, it might not be best idea to get him here. Twilight surely didn't want the sleepover to be unpleasant. And he was a guy. The reason Spike wasn't here was because he was a guy.
''We could ask him.'' Pinkie stated. One look around was enough to see that Pinkie was the only one who thought that it was a good idea.The rest also thought it might be better not to summon him. But they didn't make any objections either, and Pinkie wanted to summon him. Twilight sighed
''Go ahead.'' two simple words, and it seemed to make Pinkie 30 times happier then she already was. She took her element of harmony and spoke.
''Genie, come out.'' A bright flash, and Kevin appeared in a white apron with the text 'kiss the cook' and with a typical white chef hat on. He stood in front of a furnace with a frying pan.
''Making pancakes, making pancakes, lets finish making pancakes.'' Kevin sang before trowing a pancake in the sky. ''making pancakes, mak-'' Kevin then realized he wasn't in the sanctuary anymore.
''Huh, what-'' PLOF. The pancake landed on Kevin's head
Kevin's perspective
''Huh, what-'' PLOF. Goddammit, why does this-. I suddenly realized that the pancake was still hot. ''AHHHH, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!! I realize now that it must have been funny as hell, seeing someone in a apron with the text kiss the cook, running around with a pancake on his head, while screaming like a little girl. Then I realized: I have magic. I clapped while running and the pancake disappeared, but of course, I had my eyes closed and ran into the wall. I landed on the ground and heard the girls laughing very hard. I wonder why they laughed I thought sarcastically.
''Ha ha, very funny.'' I said as I pushed myself off the ground. I snapped my fingers and appeared in my serving clothes. Goddammit, I hate these clothes so much. ''What will your wishes be?'' I asked them. I wanted to get this done as fast as possible, so that I could continue making the pancakes.
''I wanted to ask you if you wanted to stay here and enjoy the sleepover.'' Pinkie said ''hey, funny word, sleepover. It sounds weird. Sleepover sleepover sleepover. You know what's also a funny word? Chimichanga. And-'' Lucky for me, the torture stopped when Twilight shoved her hoof into the mouth of Pinkie.
''What she is trying to say, do you want to attend the sleepover?'' Twilight asked me.
''Well, I was actually in the middle of making pancakes, so-'' Before I could finish my story Pinkie started to speak again.
''Kevin, I wish that you stay for the sleepover and that you try to like it.'' oh no, she made a wish. I sighed as I had no other choice than to attend. When I get my hands on Discord, he's gonna get it. I snapped my fingers and conjured a big cushion for me to sit on. But before i sat down, I realized something
''But I am not gonna sit down before I finish my pancakes!'' I said while shooting glitterstuff out of my hands and making cookbook appear. I then opened the cookbook, I had to find the recipe.
''Where was it, where was it.... ah here! Blood pancakes. A nice recipe from Norway.'' I said out loud before making all the ingredients appear. ''Lets see, eggs, flour, blood, milk and other things.'' I said to myself. I then noticed the horrified looks from the girls.
''Is something wrong?'' I asked them
''You-you mix BLOOD with pancakes?'' Rainbow asked me with horror. ''What's wrong with you?''
''Hey, its hecka delicious.'' Rainbow became very green and it looked like she was going to throw up. Actually, everyone looked like they were going to throw up. I looked at Twilight questionably
''Okay, I understand why they are grossed out,'' I said waving my hand to the rest ''but you have fired a million questions at me, and one of the questions was what I normally eat''
''You said vegetables, fruit, and meat. NOT BLOOD!!!'' Twilight yelled
''Hey, it's not blood from a human or pony. Its pig blood.'' and again, it looked like they were all going to trow up. Now, I like to have fun. But I also have a heart, and making blood pancakes in front of ponies who are all herbivores, and eating it while they watch, goes too far, even for me. I snapped my fingers and the furnace and the ingredients disappeared.
''I think I will just conjure up a salad.'' I said before more glitterstuff shot up from my hands and made a bowl with a salad. But with chicken in it. I'm gonna have some meat, dammit.
''Say, do you six also need something to eat?'' I asked them.
''No, we already ate before we summoned you.'' Twilight informed me. He, summon me. Sounds weird As they started talking to each other just sat there eating my salad before Rarity asked me something
'''Say, Kevin I have a question.'' Why can't I eat in peace?
''Yes, what is it?''
''I was wondering why you were wearing those clothes. I mean, you were wearing something else when we summoned you 5 minutes ago.''
''Well, that is because the rules say that I have to wear this when I'm around my masters, except when they wish that I can wear what I want. But otherwise, I need to wear this.'' I told her.
''Oh, but what did you wear before you changed into a genie?'' Rarity asked.
''Well, I want to show you, but I can't. I am only allowed to show you if you wish to view them, or if you wish that I can wear my own clothes.'' And no, for anyone who reads this, I am not lying here. This were the rules.
''Then I wish that you show me what you normally would wear.'' I snapped my fingers, and I wore a simple sweatshirt, with some simple pants under it and brown shoes.
'' I would wear something like this. Just a easy outfit.'' I then saw that Rarity did not look happy at my clothes. ''Is something wrong?'' I asked her
''Oh, no. Nothing is wrong it is certainly a... uhm.... nice outfit.'' Rarity said with a fake smile.
''Okay, I'm confused now.''
''Huh, what do you mean?''
''Well, I thought Applejack was the element of honesty. But seeing that you are even worse at lying, I don't know it for sure.'' I said before starting to laugh. ''Don't worry, I know it is not a nice outfit. I just wear it because its a easy outfit.'' I said while laughing. I then sat down and started eating my salad again.
I then remembered something: I fucking HATE salad. Sure, I like vegetables, but not mixed together. So I ate it so quickly as possible. I know that I could conjure up something else, but I am pretty lazy, so I just went for the salad I. After I was done, I let the bowl disappear and sat back on my cushion. I was just about to get a little rest, when suddenly Pinkie was right in front of my face, and bouncing up and down. I will not go into details how my screaming sounded, but it was very girlymanly.
''Would you please never do that again,'' I asked while still breathing heavily from the scare
''Do what again?''
''.....never mind. Did you wanted to ask me something?'' I asked annoyed
''Yes, now that were are finished, we can all eat these cupcakes.'' Suddenly, out of nowhere, Pinkie had a box in her hooves. Where the hell did she got that? I thought as she passed down the cupcakes.
''Here, take one.'' She offered me
''No, thanks. I don't really like things with much sugar.''
''Oh, okay.'' Twilight said ''I think Pinkie wouldn't mind''
But Pinkie did mind. How was it possible to not like sugar? Everypony liked sugar.
''No, I do mind. I insist that you take one. You have to taste at least one cupcake from Pinkie '' She said to me. But I really wasn't in the mood for a cupcake
''No thank you.''
''Eat.The.Cupcake,'' Pinkie commanded. All the laughing and smiling had stopped now, and she was all serious now, and while I would never admit it, I was scared. But I would not eat the cupcake, no matter how scared I was. I just didn't want it. I leaned closer to make I was close enough for her to hear me
''No,'' I said. Time seemed to slow down. Everybody could feel the tension in the room. But I would not bow to the pink menace, dammit. Then, in a second, Pinkie tried to shove the cupcake in my face. Lucky for me, I saw it coming. I quickly jumped out of the way.
''I don't want to eat your cupcakes!'' I said as I stood straight again.
''B-b-b-but why- everypony, how can?'' Pinkie started stuttering and talking to herself while her eyes started twitching
''Must like....but why....everypony eats....sugar....not like cupcakes....must like.....'' I stepped a few passes back as Pinkie was really starting to scare me
''What's wrong with her?'' I asked the rest of them who were are looking really concerned
''I think you broke her,'' Rainbow said. I turned back to Pinkie to see that she was still talking to herself while wearing a weird smile.
''He.....doesn't like sugar.....does....like meat.'' Pinkie suddenly perked up and faced me again ''You said that you ate meat, right?''
''Yes?'' I said warily ''Why?''
She started talking in herself again ''Meat cupcakes... need meat....how....fluttershy has meat....angel cupcakes.'' Pinkie said while grinning and laughing like she came out of a horror movie. Everybody looked at Pinkie while backing away
''Kevin?'' Twilight said
''Yes?''
''Eat the cupcake!'' Twilight whispered
''No.''
''Eat it!''
''I don’t want to!''
''Do you want her to kill Angel?''
''Well....''
''KEVIN!!!''
''But I don't want to eat the cupcake!''
''I don't care, now eat it!!!''
''No!''
''EAT IT!!!''
''NO, dammit!!''
''I wish that you eat the cupcake NOW!''
''FUCK!!'' I yelled angry ''If I get diabetes, its your fault!'' I said while walking to the crazy mare
''I want to try the cupcake,'' I said while being angry. Pinkie however, seemed to cheer up from the news, and gave me the cupcake. I took the cupcake and took a bite out of it. ''I knew it, instant diabetes!'' I thought as I took a bite from the cupcake. I swallowed the bite. (with much effort)
''I think I eat the rest later,'' I said while I placed the cupcake on a table close to me. No way I'm gonna eat more of the cupcake I thought as I sat down on my cushion again.
Now let me tell you: I just wanted to get some sleep. Getting kidnapped out of your universe and chanced into a genie, makes you tired. So I started to get annoyed when I was once again disturbed while trying to fall asleep.
So Pinkie turned on an old gramophone (seriously, a gramophone? What is this, the dark ages?) were a tune was playing. Admittedly, it was a nice tune. I found myself humming to the tune. Suddenly, Pinkie started singing to the tune
Youtube Video
Okay, so while it isn’t my type of music, I must admit that the songs was quite entertaining to hear. I was listening to the song while I was reading a book that I conjured up. (Yes, I know I was sitting in a library. But I’m not going to just take a book that isn’t mine. I have manners)
As soon as the song ended, we were all clapping for Pinkie.
Wait, why am I clapping? I don’t even wanna be here!
So it turned out we were doing karaoke. And with we, I mean they, because I am sure as hell not gonna sing in front of everybody.
I did not notice all the other songs they all sung, as I was deep in my book. It was about a guy who murdered all kinds of criminals that escaped the prison.
...As he strapped the criminal to the table. He used his free hand to get to the knife. As he had the knife in his hands, he took a few steps back, before looking at the scum with much disgust.
‘’Time to die,’’ he said as he pulled his arm back and shot-
‘’Kevin!’’
‘’AHH!!’’ I screamed while I threw the book in the air ‘’What, what’s wrong?’’ I saw Rainbow Dash laughing her ass off as she was standing next to me.
‘’Haha, so you are also an egghead like Twilight.’’ Rainbow Dash said while laughing. ‘’I got you good there.’’
‘’HEY, I’m not an egghead!’’ Twilight said to Dash ‘’I just like to read and-’’
‘’Boring!’’
Annoyed, I stood up and walked to retrieved the book I threw to the other side of the room.
‘’I hope that it isn’t damaged. I was just at a thrilling part.’’ I said while inspecting the book. ‘’Pfew, not damaged.’’ I said as I took the book and made it disappear. There will be little reading tonight
‘’So why did you call my name?’’ I asked Rainbow
‘’Its your turn to sing.’’
‘’Yeah, I’m not going to sing,’’ I said as I sat down again.
‘’Oh don’t be a party killer. We all sang, so now its your turn,’’ Rainbow said like it was some kind of fact.
‘’I actually have a good reason not to sing,’’ I told her in the hope that she wouldn’t press the issue. I was wrong
‘’What’s the reason?’’
‘’I don’t think that you would like the kind of music I listen to,’’ I stated. And it was the truth. The music I listened was either Dubstep or music with racist lyrics, and I didn’t think that they want to hear such songs
‘’How bad can it be?’’ Rainbow Dash asked
‘’I agree with her,’’ Rarity chimed in ‘’the music can’t be that bad.’’
‘’Okay, but don’t say you didn’t like the song,’’ I said as I walked to the front.
Okay, which song should I sing? What about… no that’s a stupid song. Wait, I know! As soon as I knew which song I wanted to sing, I snapped my fingers and the music started to play
Youtube Video
I didn’t even come two minutes into the song, before they stopped me from continuing this song. Well, everybody else except Rainbow and Pinkie stopped me, as they were laughing their ass of.
‘’Hey, I said you wouldn’t like my kind of music!’’ I said as I walked back to my cushion and sat on it again. Actually, I knew that they would stop me if I sung that song. It was a good way not to be forced to sing. While I quite enjoy singing, I believe that singing should only be done when you actually want to. And I didn’t feel like it now… and I did it to piss of Twilight
‘’Why are you going to sit again?’’ Twilight asked me
‘’Because you stopped my singing.’’ I told her
‘’I stopped that song. You can still sing a song that ISN’T about that topic I don’t even want to say.’’
‘’You can just say that the topic was sex, you know.’’
‘’Stop saying that word!’’ Twilight said as she looked at me with much anger ‘’Now get up and sing a song that isn’t about… you know’’
I putted my hand to my chin and pretended to think before saying: ‘’nah, I pass.’’
‘’Then I wish that you sing a song that isn’t about you know that.’’ Twilight said with a smug grin.
Think you won this round, Twilight?
‘’I’m sorry, but I don’t understand the wish you want.’’ I said while trying to give her a confused expression. ‘’What do you mean with isn’t about that?’’ I asked while my confused face turned into a smile
‘’You know what I mean! Don’t sing about that topic.’’ Twilight said
‘’I’m sorry, but you really need to say literally what you mean, otherwise I can’t understand you,’’ I said while grinning
Twilight started to become red in her face ‘’Don’t sing about sefgbh’’ Twilight said
‘’Couldn’t quite catch that,’’ I said while leaning in closer
‘’Don’t sing about sesdcsfs’’
‘’I’m sorry, what?’’
‘’I said don’t sing about sex!’’ Twilight shouted. She started to become even redder when she noticed how loud she said it…. and I was rolling on the floor laughing
‘’Oh priceless,’’ I said as I calmed down ‘’Okay, but can I drink some water first.’’ Instead of waiting for an answer, I conjured up a glass of water and sat down while drinking
Second person view:
‘’What do you want us to do?’’ Applejack asked Twilight
‘’I want that you all say that he was horrible at singing,’’ Twilight said as she whispered to her friends while Kevin was drinking water
‘’And why?’’ Rarity asked
‘’Because I think that the reason that Kevin is mean to other humans, is because he thinks he’s good in everything, and thus sees himself better than the other humans. If we show him that he is horrible at singing, it might make him less mean.’’ Twilight explained
‘’I don’t think he’s that mean, actually.’’ Rainbow spoke up ‘’Yes, he turned those ponies into monsters, but only because they called him a monster. And you said that he turned them back.’’
‘’Because I told him to,’’ Twilight said to Rainbow ‘’How can you say that he’s nice?’’
‘’Hey, I’m not saying I won’t help you with this. It are just my thoughts.’’ Rainbow said
Twilight shook her head before saying: ‘’So you all help me with this?’’ She asked. The rest just nodded
‘’Hey, if you’re done talking, can I begin? I want to get this over so fast as possible.’’ Kevin said from the other side of the room
‘’Yes, I’m done.’’ She said before Kevin snapped his fingers and music started to play
The song Kevin decided to sing was this one:
Youtube Video
After Kevin was done, he looked around the room to see that the jaws of everypony where on the floor.
‘’Twilight?’’ Applejack whispered
‘’Yes?’’
‘’I reckon that that was one of most beautifullest song I’ve heard in m’a life.’’
‘’So what did you thought about it?’’ Kevin asked Twilight
Twilight wanted to say that he sung horrible, but she just couldn’t do it.
Come on Twilight, say that it was horrible
‘’Uhm, it was….’’
‘’So awesome!’’ Rainbow interrupted her. Twilight just glared at Rainbow.
''Can I just sit again?'' Kevin asked
Twilight facehoofed before saying: ‘’go ahead’’
Kevin’s perspective
Not much else happened that night. We did some small games afterwards and talked a little bit, and eventually the girls all went to sleep. Because I couldn’t get back in my sanctuary (because Pinkie wished I stayed for the sleepover) I conjured up a sleep bag and went to sleep
A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Damn Twilight, you scary!
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Dash a wonderbolt... HELL NO!!!
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
The cutie mark crusaders... m'kay
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Update: sequal and other stories
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Genie?... God, Why a Genie???
Today was a good day. Well, it did not start as a good day, but it is now
Discord had stolen the elements of harmony and turned Twilight's friends to the opposite of their persona's. Lucky for Twilight, she could give them their memories back, and find the elements, and they defeated Discord. They all got a ceremony and it was nice to be seen as heroes. But it was not necessary for Twilight to be famous. The gossip that ponies did when there was someone famous, was enormous in Canterlot. Lucky for her, in Ponyville they did not see them as heroes. It was now a few hours after the ceremony and they were still in Canterlot, speaking to the princess how they had beaten Discord
''And then we went, KABOEM, and Discord got a taste of the rainbow.'' Rainbow Dash was telling proud how they defeated Discord.
Celestia was happy that everything was solved and that Discord was back in stone. But there was something.... off about the elements. It looked like Discord did something to them. But they still worked, so there was nothing to worry about.
As soon as Rainbow wanted to speak again, a voice could be heard.
''Hehehehe, it was a nice fight indeed.'' the voice of Discord spoke
Celestia immediately jumped and stood in a fighting stance. She would not let her ponies get any harm.
''Were are you, Discord?'' Celestia said to him while the main six quickly put on their elements
''Oh Celestia, you should know where I am. I'm in stone and cannot escape. I just wanted to compliment you on your victory. You see, when something is changed into stone, It takes about a day before the mind is also trapped. So I just wanted to say goodbye.''
Celestia did not seemed to be convinced and still stood in a battle stand.
''Oh, I know that you don't like me. And that's why I have a surprise. the only thing you need to say is: genie come out. The rest will show then.''
''Is this some kind of trick?!'' Celestia said angrily.
''Why would you think that, Celestia? No I just want to give you all a gift for defeating me. I honor my enemy's if they won. well, I will be going now, because my mind is getting weaker, so until next time, Celestia.'' Discord said before his voice disappeared.
A long silence happened before Twilight spoke up.
''Princess, do you think we need to say the trigger sentence?'' Twilight asked Celestia. Even though Twilight thinks Discord is evil, She was very curious about what would happen if they would say it.
Celestia thought for a moment. This can go wrong on so many ways. However, thousand years ago discord did the same, but then when Celestia came in the castle, there was a mirror made by Discord that would let you travel to another dimension. And she was also curious about what Discord did.
''Alright, my little ponies, use the trigger sentence''
I just began reading another book. You see, I was a fast reader. A VERY fast reader. In 4 hours, I had read a book with almost 500 pages. I just started with his next book, when he felt a pulling sensation. I felt the sensation becoming bigger and bigger. Then suddenly a lot of smoke started to appear around me. It started slowly, but it became more and more in mere seconds. Then the smoke pulled me to the door. I can only say, that I was scared. But I also knew that I was getting summoned. The smoke was getting more and more and it was becoming hard to breathe. Then I became really angry. Angry at Discord for tricking me. When I'm out, I will kill him
Then suddenly the door slammed open and a light flash of bright could be seen. Then the smoke started to become thick and I started to cough, when suddenly the smoke disappeared and I could see another room. I then realized: I'm out of the element! And now I am gonna kick Discords ass.
''Okay where is that motherfucker Discord!'' I said in anger to myself. ''I will kill him for tricking me like this!'' I then heard some people scream behind me. I turned around, expecting to see the humans who summoned me. Only for me realize that there were no persons. There were horses. Multicolored horses. Who can TALK! There was one big horse, and 6 smaller ones who were looking at me with a mix of fear and curiosity. Oh you asshole! Not only did Discord send me to another dimension, it seemed that in this dimension, ponies were the dominant species. And looking at them, they had never seen a human before. Otherwise, they would not freak out this much.
''Well, isn't this great?'' I started to say angrily.'' Discord did not only change me into a friking genie, he also transported me to a world with multicolored horses! I swear, if I get my hands on that guy, I will rip out his organs and show them to him!'' This was not the best thing to say, as I saw those smaller horses become pale after I said it. Then the bigger horse then decided to step forward.
''What are you and why are you here?!'' The horse asked me. ''And would you please refrain from using that kind of language?!'' And me, being the asshole I am, and because she was so demanding, HAD to not listen to her demand
''Well well, straight to the point. I like you, sunbutt.'' And of course, the ponies behind her all gasped at what I said. Must be a important horse. But before someone could speak up, I started to speak again. ''and to answer your questions, one: I was a human, now I'm a genie, and for two: I am here because that asshole Discord tricked me.'' I snapped my fingers and summoned a chair for me to sit on. I sat down in the chair.
''To make a long story short: I came home, Discord messed up my TV, and said that he could give me all the power I desired. And of course, me being stupid, I agreed and he changed me into a genie and send me to this universe. And now I need to fulfill wishes for the bearers of the elements, or something like that. And I guess you don't have a spell for sending me back?'' I said nonchalant
Celestia looked at me for about half a minute before speaking
''I do have a spell for sending you back.'' Celestia said
I cannot believe my ears. She HAS a spell for sending me back. Thank god, at lest I can go back now. ''Really, o thank god. I can finally get home and then I will...''
''But I will not use the spell''
A moment of silence
''What?'' Why is she being difficult now?
''I have done a quick memory read spell, and I have seen-''
''Wait, what! You used a memory spell on me? Who gave you permission? You are lucky that my powers still have to regenerate, as the book called it, or otherwise I would make sure that you could not read my memory.'' my god, who does she think she is?
''I am princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria!''
''Isn't this great, now she can read minds to! Wait one moment.'' I snapped my fingers and a small light flash came from my hand, and my mind was my own again. ''So, I set up a barricade to make sure no one enters my thoughts or memories. But now back to the matter at hand-''
''Don't ya mean hoof?'' one of the little horses with a cowboy had asked me
''Hand hoof, I don't care! I want to know why your horse princess won't send me back.'' The last of the sentence I spoke to Celestia
''We are ponies.'' Celesta said
''Whatever.''
''Like I was saying before I got interrupted,'' Celestia said before giving me a nasty glare.''I have seen your memories and I saw that you did some very..... mean things to your fellow humans.''
''Name one!''
''Wanting to pull some random person at the side of the road, to make him angry.'' fuck
''Well, that was just one time!''
''One of the many times, and you know it.'' Celestia said to me. Okay, now I'm getting angry. She does not want to send me back because I did some harmless pranks?
''So I think you can use a lesson.''
''WHAT!!!''
''You will fulfill the wishes of the bearers of the elements, until I decide that I will send you back''
"I don't think that is necessarily, I think that-''
''Twilight, can you please wish him into the element again. And I suggest that from now on you wear your elements, because then you can summon the genie for every wish.''
''Awhh, this is going to be awesome. A own genie!'' the rainbow colored pony, (or Pegasus, seeing that she had wings) said
''Hey!'' I yelled to her.'' I am not a possession!''
''But twilight, can you please wish him into his sanctuary again?'' Celestia asked
''Of course, princess.''
''No, don't you dare!'' I said while pointing with my finger to her
''I wish-''
''No, stop it!''
-that you are-
''Just send me back to my own universe!''
-back in your sanctuary.''
I looked at my legs and saw that were my legs used to be, was now a tail that was attached to the crown thingy. I then felt a pulling sensation that was pulling me to the crown. I quickly hold on to the table that stood close to me.
''NO, I WANT TO GET HOME!'' I yelled before I was sucked into the crown. I opened my eyes again to see me standing in the same room as earlier.
''FUCK!!!''
They all watched when the genie was send into the crown again. And Twilight smiled at this. No one insults the princess and gets away with it.
''....Twilight?''
''Hm, o, i'm sorry, what?''
''Do you think you can handle this genie, Twilight?'' Celestia asked
Twilight thought about this for a moment. he could give trouble. Then again, he had to fulfill their wishes, so they could easily contain him. What could go wrong?
''Yes, I think we can handle this, right girls?''
''Right'' they all said in union.
