Chapters Cortez walked through one of his mansion's many hallways, a bottle of ale in his hand and the moonlight glinting off his Shroomite Armour. He approached a chest and flung it open with a creak that echoed through the halls. As he was about to pull out his Venus Magnum, an odd glow coming from off to the side caught his attention. The glow's source was a long wooden rod with what looked like a small unicorn cut from a large Amethyst, which seemed to glow with violet energy.
'What in Red's name is that?' thought Cortez, as he examined it more closely. He noticed it had the words Baculum Equestria engraved on the lower end. 'What could that mean? It's certainly not Terrarian,' he thought. Cortez could feel strange magic pulsing off of it. 'Maybe I should consult Tagar. He's smart when it comes to magic stuff, maybe he might know what this is,' he decided, before grabbing the strange staff and heading off to find his Wizard.
Cortez arrived at Tagar's sleeping chambers shortly. Upon his gentle prodding, Tagar awoke and greeted Cortez with a bleary, "Someone once said friendship is magic. That's ridiculous, you can't turn people into frogs with friendship! Oh, hello there Levi, what can I do for you today?"
"My name is Cortez, not Levi," Corrected Cortez. "Can you tell me what this strange stick with a horse on the end does?" The old Wizard stared into his crystal ball for a moment and then placed the staff on the table. "I can most certainly attempt to, Dominique," he stated, ignoring Cortez's sigh.
After a few waves of his hands across the staff and more silent staring into his crystal ball, Tagar seemed more confused than enlightened. "Definitely magic, but I don't think it is a strong weapon...perhaps it's a teleporter of some kind, like the Rod of Discord?" Tagar ventured. "Perhaps you should go ask the Goblin."
Cortez flung his hands into the air with a heavy sigh. "Yeah, I'll go ask him. Thanks anyway. Useless Wizard..." Grabbing the staff, he left the room in search of the Goblin's forge.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"I still don't know why we carry around all these spiky balls, do you?" the Goblin asked as he spotted Cortez entering.
"I don't, and I also don't know what this staff is," was Cortez's reply.
"Hmm," he said as he inspected the offered staff carefully, running a small object over it"It seems to be an object, a magic staff, pulsing with 20,000 Terathaum's!"
"It that a lot?" Cortez asked.
"Well, considering the Heat Ray is one of the most powerful weapons we have seen and only has 40 megaathaums..." the Goblin trailed off.
"That's a lot, then."
"I would say ask Levi. He has explored many places and is generally quite a good guide," the Goblin offered.
"Okay." Taking the staff, Cortez left the oppressive heat of the Goblin's forge. Cortez walked outside to where the Levi was not sleeping, but rather pacing the length of the garden. Levi jumped when Cortez appeared.
"Sorry, didn't see you there, it must be that Shroomite stealth mode," he said, rubbing his neck.
"I wasn't using it, you were just too focused on the floor. Also, I was wondering if you might know what this staff is?" Cortez asked as he handed him the staff.
"I'm not sure, I've never seen anything like this in all my hours of travelling. Try pointing it into the sky and focusing mana through it. Maybe something'll happen," he offered.
"Alright then, I'll do that. Can't hurt anything if I point it into the sky...except maybe a harpy or two..." Cortez left the garden to find a quiet spot to cast, blissfully unaware about how wrong he was.
When reached the top of a nearby hill, ignoring the dozens of rabbits swarming at his feet, he pointed the staff upwards. Drawing upon his mana and pouring it into the staff, he felt the power of a hundred great Wizards (and unicorns) flow through him, as though the staff were reacting to his magic. A rainbow beam shot out into the evening sky, but instead of simply flying off, it curved towards his wondrous mansion and began wrapping it up. After a moment, the mansion was fully enveloped, and the rainbow flashed, extending a beam into the sky and causing a very loud ping noise. Cortez stared in disbelief; every last pixel of his mansion was now gone, even the garden and Levi, who were outside. Cortez looked towards the beam of light flying into the sky, almost gone by now, and knew what he he had to do.
"I'm coming for you, guys!" he shouted, before pointing the unicorn at his face and pouring as much mana into it as he could. He felt the rainbow envelop him, before a strange squeezing sensation and a blur as he suddenly rocketed upwards in the same direction as his manor.
Every pixel zoomed and whirled through space, passing thousands of stars, black holes, even entire galaxies, until the light beams landed in a system an enormous amount of astronomical units away, where it flew into a planet in a strange orbit around its sun. The beam of rainbows and light and pixels landed near a small village, on the edge of a really large and spooky forest. Every atom in the beam's landing zone was vaporized, and replaced by a very large mansion with a garden attached, a bunch of vendors, and soon one very dazed and confused Cortez.
______________________________________________________________Meanwhile, in the CMC clubhouse.___________________________________________________________________
"Ok, we're sure to get our Cutie Marks this time!" Scootaloo exclaimed enthusiastically.
"I dunno scoots, I think this might be a bit dangerous. I mean, more so than last time when we tried to get our Cutie Marks in bomb disarming," Sweetie Belle retorted.
"I think trying to disarming a bomb in the middle of Ponyville is more dangerous that this," Scootaloo argued.
"Ah think we should jes' do it, Ah mean, what's tha worst that could happen?" Applebloom ended the argument.
"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS DEEP EVERFREE EXPLORERS, YAY!" the trio shouted in not-so-perfect harmony.
The trio wandered through the forest, and after about half an hour stopped by a tree to rest.
"You sure night was a good time to do this?" Sweetie Belle asked Scootaloo.
"Duh! Any other time and our sisters would have stopped us," Scootloo answered.
"Ah wonder why they wouldn't want us out here this late..." Applebloom said to no-one in particular.
"Cause, they don't have adventurous minds like us. It's something that happens when you grow up, you start to think that anything fun is too dangerous to do."
"Well let's jes' not grow up then! C'mon, let's keep goin'!" Applebloom led them away from their resting place.
...They did not expect to find a pack of corrupted timberwolves.
They walked for several more minutes before Sweetie Belle smelled something. "What's that awful smell?" she hollered, nose contorted in disgust.
"I dunno, but it smells kinda' like... TIMBERWOLVES!" All three of them screamed in terror and began to run forward, the pack of timberwolves bursting from their hiding spots in the nearby brush in pursuit. They dodged trees and jumped over rocks, but soon Applebloom cried out in pain. She had slipped, and the timberwolves, sensing her predicament, pounced!
______________________________________________________________Meanwhile, outside the forest..._________________________________________________________________
Cortez stumbled away from his manor and looked around. Not too far away he saw what looked like a jungle crossed with the Corruption. After taking a few steps away, he idly broke away some Corrupt grass with his Shroomite Digging Claw. He wondered how the Corruption got this close to his house, and why the surrounding terrain was so different from what he was used to. Perhaps the rod had simply moved his house, rather than sending him to space? Hadn't he had stopped the spread of the Corruption and the Hallow ages ago? Before his many questions could be answered, he heard what sounded like several loud screams coming from just inside the forest. Cortez pulled out his Megashark, loaded some Chlorophyte bullets into the chamber, and with lightning speed, leaped over a rock and began firing into the forest at random. He heard several loud crack! sounds in retort, as well as the sounds of dying wolves.
Applebloom and the other Crusaders shook in fright as the wolves came down to make the kill, only to be rent apart by what looked like tiny green streaks of magic moving very fast. The fire in the wolves' eyes died as they fell apart with a loud howl, before all was still. Something had killed the wolves, but what or who was it?
The CMC, still unsure of what had happened, quickly looked around but failed to notice Cortez as his armour had caused him to vanish.
"W-what was that?" Sweetie belle asked with uncertainty.
"I dunno, but whatever it was, it's green and Awesome" Scootloo said in awe, still looking around.
As the three of them exchanged ideas Cortez watched feeling satisfied, but decided to figure out where he was, and why a unicorn was not trying to impale him. Using the power of lightning, he arrived back at his house within seconds, and had some questions for the Levi.
"Levi, you have maps, where are we, and have you ever seen a unicorn without a horn?" Cortez asked inpaitanly.
"I have maps and have been trying to figure out the same question, and I have not." The guide responded while still looking at a map that was on the table.
"I saw a Unicorn, one without a horn and one with wings! Ever heard of such things?"
"I have not seen the last two you mentioned, or heard of them. I recommend you fly around and check out what else there is here besides a Forrest."
"Thanks Levi, I'll do that" Cortez walked out of the room, thinking about how unhelpful he had been.
With speeds only achievable with the power of lighting, Cortez got to the site of where the wolves had been earlier, and noticed the mysterious unicorns were not there anymore. He went to where remains of the Timberwolves still lay, and could smell corruption. It looked like he and his house was not the only piece of Terraria to be here.
A few minutes later he threw his hover bored underneath him, and jumped on. He flew above the trees and toward Ponyville. He flew off into the sunrise and from the view of the harpy following him, it would have looked really cool, but harpys don't generally notice that sort of thing. The harpy soon met its fate as a grenade turned it into a pile of crisp feathers.
After about five minutes of flying, he noticed what looked like a small settlement. He landed a little ways away and he began to run through the streets faster than any pony there would have believed possible, and stopped in front of a large tree with books inside. He resisted the urge to go inside and look around at the books, because he knew his stealth mode didn't make him intangible.
After running faster than most would believe possible for about an hour, Cortez became tired and stopped at a corner to rest. He looked around. Not many ponies were up and he guessed it was early in the morning. Suddenly he heard a feeble cry from around the corner, and with speed that would rival that of the dungeon guardian, searched the block for the source of the cry. He discovered the plea had originated from the next block over. The sight he saw was several gruff looking stallions chasing a young fille around a corner. Within a few seconds, she had run into a lonely alleyway. The gang circled her as she cowered next to a dumpster, whimpering.
"Well, well look what we have here" Laughed the one who appeared to be the leader of the pack. He drew back his fist and struck Square in the face, she cried out in pain and shrunk down further. Unnoticed by all of them, Cortez was watching from a distance. The gang ponies looked about as powerful as a caster with no magic, but decided to wait.
The darker ponies advanced further on the pink pony, one pushed her to her feet as they all circled her laughing and making comments of the upmost rudeness. One began to speak,"Hello my little pony, don't worry, we're real nice" Cortez was rather annoyed by his tone, and knew exactly what he planned to do.
"No guards to help you here, there's no one who can save you from us, hold her down!" He commanded his henchmen.
Now Cortez feared for that pony in the centre. After concluding she was not equipped to defend herself and if she was she was not going to. He decided to take action.
All of the ponies jumped as Cortez appeared a few feet away from them,"I'm here." He said in an rather intimidating voice.
"No o— eh? Who are you, well whoever you are, you messed with the wrong ponys, Get him boys!"
The first one charged, but met his fate as Cortez flung his clawed hand up at just the right moment to render him lifeless. The second one came at him from the side and Cortez whipped out his shinning Venus magnum, he took one shot at the attacker, and the pony fell to the ground lifeless. Cortez let several bullets burry themselves into the next attackers. The last henchmen was sliced apart by a beam of true night. Cortez saw unmistakable fear in the last stallions eyes, but none the less he charged and let out a battle cry. He swung his knife but Cortez effortlessly dodged it. When the second swing was attempted, Cortez easily ran around him and slapped him in the rear end, hard. The stallion cried out in pain as he turned around swiftly. He swung his blade powerfully, but he was no match for the speed of Cortez. He caught the knife, then bent the stallions hoof back, before flipping him onto his back.
"Arrgh." The gang leader couldn't stifle his agony. As he began to rise, he was violently hoisted into the air by his neck. "Wh-who are you." He wasted his breath to ask.
"I am Terrarian." Was the last thing the stallion said before he was thrown into the dumpster, destroying it, and then Cortez ended his miserable existence with several shots from he Venus magnum.
"T-terraian, is that your name?" The fille barley managed to summon the courage to ask.
"My name is Cortez." Was the last thing he said before flying back to his house.
Cortez flew across the morning sky, still thinking about why someone would go about defenseless like that. No of the solutions Cortez had could come up with could solve the mystery of walking about unarmed. Until he thought of one thing; what if this land was generally peaceful enough that that was unnecessary? No, that was impossible; no place could be like that. He continued to fly, still wondering.
Cortez entered his house and popped open a rather large bottle of ale, consuming it within a few minutes. Soon, Gunpowder Garry walked into the room.
"Hey there me hearty, mind if I join ye?" he asked.
"No not at all, have some ale."
"What's the occasion?"
"I explored the town and found some pony being attacked another, she did nothing to defend herself though, so I killed all the attackers. I'm planning to go check it out again later."
"Hmm, strange. Who wouldn't be prepared to defend themselves? Sounds...stupid, to walk around unarmed," Gunpowder Garry said, stroking his beard.
"I know, it's so strange. Of course, it's possible that they have defensive powers or something that I don't know of," Cortez wondered.
"Well, it seems ta me that perhaps they need some sort of 'guardian angel'," Gunpowder Garry said, smirking.
"Perhaps. I'll go find out if there's anything else that needs to be ended," Cortez replied.
"Yea, ye—" Cortez sped out of the room. "...do that." The pirate soon proceeded to swipe another bottle of ale from the shelf, looking around shiftily.
Cortez flew above the city, looking for anything that could interest him. He dropped down to the ground and began speeding through the streets, being careful not to hit anything. Meanwhile, Twilight was using a telescope to try and get a better glimpse of the blue blur that had been reported. So many reports had been filed to the mayor, but she had decided to let Twilight figure it out. She had been looking for hours, but had little success. Just when Twilight was about to give up, she noticed a translucent blue streak somewhere on the other side of town. She quickly ran down her stairs, out the front door, and raced as fast as she possibly could to the blur's location. Cortez was many times faster, though, and had arrived back near Golden Oaks in that time. The two collided, leaving Twilight in the ground with a bad headache, and Cortez flipped over several times, although he recovered quickly and continued his trek across the town.
After a few minutes, he saw three ponies standing atop one of the larger buildings in the town.
"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS BASE JUMPERS, YAY!!!" he could hear from the ground as the trio jumped. The three fillies promptly noticed that they had forgotten to use any means of landing safely.
"HEEEEEELELELLLLLLPPPPPPPP!" Cortez heard their cry, and answered.
In one swift movement he rocketed toward the building, crashing through the doors, causing them to fly across the lobby. Cortez then ran up the stairs in a flash of blue. Less than a second later, he had arrived at a window on the mezzanine, and he jumped through the window like it was nothing, destroying it. He just managed to catch the trio by crashing into them, catching the falling fillies and landing on the (now very broken road) without the use of his hoverboard. Several bystanders looked at him, but only had a few seconds to do so before he sped off back to his house.
"Ugh, this thing is impossible to get a glimpse of!"
"I'm sure that you'll find it someti— burrrrrrp." A letter protruded from the fire that had escaped Spike's mouth.
"It's a letter from Mayor Mare. It says, "Dear Twilight; Reports have now come in of the blue streak saving three fillies. It soon disappeared though, and we have not seen it since. The last we saw of it was right outside my office window. -Mayor Mary Mare P.S, Some of the townsfolk are getting uneasy about this, please prove it's not a threat or take care of it soon. Good luck. -Mary... heh, I'm sure it's no match for something like, I don't know, the Elements of Harmony?" Spike said, rolling his eyes as he finished reading the scroll aloud.
"Spike, we don't even know it's dangerous! However, it saved three fillies—and I bet I know whom—so it can't be all bad," Twilight replied.
"Yeah right! It's probably one of those aliens who what to gain our trust, then capture and experiment on us, and turn us into zombie ponies!" Spike said worriedly.
"Spike, what comic books have you been reading?" Twilight asked skeptically.
"Oh, nothing...just 'Zombie aliens from Planet X', that's all." Spike shrugged. He held out his comic book for her.
Twilight picked it up and flipped through it. "Spike, this is nothing a dragon your age should be reading!" Twilight scolded, but was interrupted when Spike belched out yet another letter. "It's from the princess, we need to go right away!"
After flying back, Cortez found Levi outside his house looking at the garden. The guide jumped when he saw Cortez, but before he could greet him, Cortez began to speak; "I never thought I would save a unicorn from a monster infected by Corruption, or three multiracial fillies from falling to their death!" he ranted.
"Well, I take it you did, but it will be nightfall soon, and who knows what dangers there are here you haven't encountered." Levi offered sagely.
"True, and I'm tired. Goodnight, Levi. Don't drink all my ale while I sleep." Cortez walked off to his bedroom. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow.
Cortez dreamed of a store he had seen being robbed, and he flew in from the roof and rained all Hell upon them, slaughtering the crooks. But, the reaction from the ones he had saved was not what he expected. They began running and screaming, and their Royal Guard came in to defend. They were no match for top-tier Terrarian weaponry, however, and were taken down with ease. Then, suddenly, the moon rose, dyed a crimson hue. Hordes of zombies overpowered their guard, ripping apart anypony that got in their path. Demon eyes began terrorizing the town, turning it into a realm of chaos. Quickly, the sun took the place of the crimson moon, the zombies soon rendered lifeless and disappearing due to the daylight. The sky was filled with cotton candy, the clouds of sugar raining thick, beady drops of chocolate milk rather than rainwater. All chaos imaginable—and more—was what lie before him, his only wish being for this nightmare to end.
When his wish was granted, Cortez awoke...and to his horror, part of his dream was reality!
Cortez flew outside, disregarding the fact that there was a window in the way, and began to look around. To his horror the ground had become a checker board, and the clouds were Cotten candy, raining chocolate milk! A group of overly large squirrels came and began tackling him. Their lives were soon ended as Cortez rose into the sky to get a better look at the city. He looked up at the sun and noticed it was midday, then the moon took its place and it was nearly dawn. Cortez smashed a wall apart to get a look at the clock. It was afternoon. Cortez sped toward the town, pushing the shroomite infused circuits to fly as fast as possible.
'How could I have slept through all this?' Cortez thought to himself angrily. He could have stopped this, the ponies were much too weak to have a chance fighting whatever it was that caused this. His thoughts were interrupted when he ran into a grey Pegasus sleeping on a cloud. The crash caused Cortez to be flung off his hover broad, as it began to fall in the direction of what looked like a long canyon. Cortez swore as he fell toward the ground, preparing for the pain that awaited him. When it came he uprooted a tree and destroyed a habitat of snakes.
Cortez awoke minutes later, to find that snakes did not like to have their home landed on by a blue streak from the sky. The snakes began to slither around him, attempting to bind him to the ground, while they hissed. Cortez, grabbed one of them and tore it in half. He then whipped two others with the halves. He threw the halves away and swung his arm to end the life of one. The others were thrown away as Cortez used the limited flight ability of lighting boots. It was enough to get him going in the right directing of where he had seen his hover board go.
In a few minutes he had arrived at the gorge. It appeared gastly, but none the less, he dove in, forgetting he had no hoverbord. He tumbled down the side of the canyon, causing a small Avalanche. He cursed himself for forgetting to attach the feet straps. Cortez fell off a large cliff and landed next to his hoverbord. He lie in the ground from the fall, unconscious. He soon recovered though, and snatched up the hoverbord and threw it underneath him, and sped off.
He soon arrived in Ponyville, and landed atop a mid sized building, and pulled out an object had had not yet had a good time to use in this land, "Well, first time for the sniper rifle." He loaded the weapon with one bullet. He propped up the riffle on the window sill, and used the scope to aim right for the monster. He saw several ponies talking to a monster, that was obviously the cause of the chaos. He placed his finger on the trigger and oppressed it. A blinding flash shot out of the barrel, and the green streak flew straight to the target, and embedded it's self into Discord.
Twilight was confused. A green streak had come out of no where, and it caused the embodiment of chaos to fell pain. Cortez then jumped down and made a dramatic impact in front of Discord,"You will not ruin this land, I will not allow it!" Cortez said to him firmly.
"Oh, no who does he think he is bossing the lord of chaos around like that, let's teach him a lesson shall we?" Discord said in a playful tone as he snapped his fingers, giving Cortez an overly large and goofy moustache.
Cortez was not fond of his game, and to display his power, whipped out his possessed hatchet as it whirled around, chopping off what discord had done,"Sorry to ruin your hard work."
"Well well, getting a bit cockey are we? Well let's see here." The embodiment of chaos assembled a large Boulder in front of him, and hurled it in the direction of Cortez, who by the power of Ankh shielding, deflected it with ease. Cortez could see he was getting worried. Discord hurled another, this time Cortez side-stepped it with ease. The next rock was mid-sized, and when Cortez caught it, he crouched it into powder, he could see a hint of fear in the chaotic beings eyes. Discord decided to try a different projectile. He assembled a fire ball between his paw and claw, and let it explode causing the fireball to expand in all directions. Cortez was unharmed by this though, and the lord of chaos raised his hands erupting fire from the ground! Cortez zipped in assorted directions to avoid the flame, as he prepared to attack!
"My turn then?" Cortez then charged toward the towering creature, and slid under his paw to avoid it, before giving a mighty stab with his shroomite claw. Discord tried to mask his pain as he took another swing at Cortez, who again dodged it. Then discord got lucky. He slammed his claw into Cortez with all his chaotic might, sending Cortez into the air, and into the stripped shop that was behind Twilight and the others.
"Well now my little ponies, now that that interruption is over with, shall we get on with this?" Just as the chaotic being finished his sentence, a flaming bullet forged with curses of corrupted monstrosities, struck him below his wing. He had rarely felt pain, much less liked the sensation he felt now. The cursed flame gave him the sensation of being burned form the inside out. The six elements cringed as the embodiment of chaos, let out a high scream, not just because of the pain, but because he now knew what being had come to end him.
"You will not rule this land." Cortez told him flatly as he continued his unrelentless barrage of gunfire,"This is your final day." Cortez continued to take slow steps toward him as the bullets flashed out of his Venus magnum.
Discord continued to scream as the pain brought him to his knees. The green flames began to consume him, he knew his end was soon. As Cortez got right to where he was, he stopped firing, as the flames continued to burn him,"P-please, d-d-don't kill me." He said feebly,"I can change, I can change!" He half yelled half cried, "Please Terrarian I beg you, spare me!" But Cortez (who wondered how he knew what he was) did not feeling merciful, he took a step back and prepared to administer the final shot. But as he pulled the trigger, a beam of pure harmony struck discord, turning him to stone, the bullet shattered upon impact with the still flaming statute.
The six looked at Cortez in awe, and Cortez looked at them in shock that they had not let him kill Discord,'Why? Why didn't you let me kill him, he transformed your peaceful land into a land of chaos, why spare him?' As he turned to face them, he saw them ready an explanation. Unfortunately he was already storming off into the forest before they could deliver
"Wait!" Twilight stepped forward to explain, but he was gone.
"Don't worry sugercube, you did what was right." Applejack reassured her.
"Poor Discord, the flames are still there." Fluttershy said sympathetically.
"I personally think he go exactly what he deserved, but no one deserves a death sentence." Rarity said to the sky,"You did the right thing deer."
"Yeah, if he comes and try's to kill anything again, we'll kick his flank!" Rainbow dash told Twilight.
"I still can't help but think what could drive some pony to kill like that." Twilight paused,"But I'm going to find out!"
Cortez stormed out to the Forrest and took his anger out on several unfortunate Timberwolves who where shredded faster than a cheeta on Hermes Boots. He also flew up and with an almighty roar crashed into a mountain, making it much shorter than it had been minutes earlier. His anger of the monsters salvation had maddened him beyond reason.
Minutes later he pulled out his rocket launcher, and filled it with rocket lV's, before blasting a section of the Forrest to kingdom come, and then he flew up and destroyed the place he had been standing.
After a long stay atop the mountain, calming himself, He realized the life of Discord was not truly that important to him. This didn't make him any less angry at the Lord of Chaos though.
As he slowly flew home he still tried to comprehend the ponies lettering him live. He had destroyed their land, and probably would have killed them. Cortez did not know about the element of harmony, and thought the only reason they had prevailed, was because he had distracted Discord, giving them enough time to trap him in a stone prison.
It was afternoon by the time he had went back to his house, to find the pirate captain passed out in his living room, a bottle if ale next to him. He went to talk to Levi,"The ponies let him live, after all he had done, they allowed him to live!"
The guide looked out the window,"Well then why are things back the way they were, oh and winter is coming, you should winterize the house and prepare a room for Santa himself." The guide sidetracked, not wanting Cortez to let his rage surface.
"They trapped him in the stone prison he probably just escaped! What's to say the same will not repeat?" Cortez asked the guide.
"There's you, you whipped him and could anything here be more powerful than the lord of chaos himself." He could not be more wrong.
Twilight was going mad searching the canterlot archives for something that could say what this creature could possibly be, with no success. She had skimmed the most ancient books, written many thousands of years before. She was just about to give up when she found something with a picture of something that looked rather like the thing that was about to kill Discord. It showed how this being killed its foes, without mercy, and noting could challenge it. It was also kind, and saved many ponies, before it just, disappeared. She also learned that this being was called a "Terrarian", and that they come from the land known as "Terraria".
This explained some things, and she concluded that this Terrarian needed to be found and taught the magic of friendship, she got looking right away.
After many hours of searching, she decided to go back home. She got on for an uneventful train ride, except when some crazy light green unicorn was going mad asking about the creature she had seen,"You must have been searching the canterlot archives too, my names Lyra, what was it like, do you know what humans are? My name's Lyra and sorry, I'm just so exited that I might finally get to meet a human!" She practically screamed in delight.
"Yes, I'm Twilight, it stood on its back legs and nearly killed Discord, no, you already said that and I noticed!" Twilight was already exausted and did not feel like dealing with crazy mares.
"Well hi Twilight, now as I was saying I've been trying to prove the existence of humans for years now, but every pony thinks I'm crazy."
'I agree with them' Twilight thought to herself,"Well sorry to disappoint you but I don't think it's 'Human'" Twilight answered, 'ugh why does this mare have to know everything about this thing'.
"So than what is it, answer that!" She said defiantly.
The train stopped and the door opened,"Well, I've really got to be going then, bye!" Twilight sped off as fast as she possibly could.
"Wait, I have another three hundred and sixty-seven questions to ask!" Lyra chased Twilight through the Ponyville. Twilight kept running "How tall was it? Did it have hands? How did it hold the weapon?" Twilight ran into her house and slammed the door hard and Lyra continued shouting out questions, but the sound was muffled by the door.
"Well, did ya find anything?" Spike asked rather enthusiastically as he tossed an empty container of ice cream over his shoulder.
"I did and you should be getting to sleep." Twilight pointed toward his bed.
"Awww com'on Twilight, can't I stay up a little longer?" Spike pleaded.
"No, you should have been in bed hours ago, young dragons need their sleep." Spike made a noticeable humph noise as he trudged off to bed. Twilight however, was up for some late night stargazing. She pointed her telescope toward the moon and couldn't help but notice something about it was off, it looked like a snow man!
Several minutes earlier, Cortez sat on his deck, and kept thinking about the monster, and as it became night, he felt a chill in the air. He ran in and said to Levi,"What time of year do you think it is?"
"I believe it is Mid summer." Levi replied.
"It seems a little cold for summer." Cortez told him.
Levi consulted a telescope and some charts,"Look out at the moon."
Cortez looked out the window at the moon,"That's no moon" He loaded his Venus magnum,"That's a snowman!"
Twilight heard an unholy scream as dozens of sharp pine needles were shot in her direction. She dove behind her bed to avoid them, as spike ran toward her, his scales protecting him,"T-t-twilight, what's happening!"
"I don't know, but it's not safe here, let's get outside!" The two of the raced outside to be greeted once again by the unholy scream, as what looked like a present with teeth was trying to chew her apart. She blasted it with magic, and it was incinerated. She then saw a heard of zombie Elfs making their was toward them as the unholy sound returned.
"What are these things?" Spike asked.
"IT MATTER NOT WHAT THEY BE, WE SHALL MAKE THEM BURN!!!!!!!" Luna swooped down with her horn ablaze, as streaks of fire rained down from the sky, turning the ever scream into a pile of ask.
"Princess Luna! What are you doing here?"
"WE CAME TO AIDE YOU IN THIS FIGHT, AS WE THOUGHT THEEE MAY NEED OUR ASSISTSNCE!!" She quickly turned around and fried a hoard of zombie Elfs.
Cortez was pushing the circuits on his hoverbord to the max trying to get to the town, minutes later he saw twilight in a building, and then a santank driving toward the same building. It let out a hellstorm of bullets upon twilight, present raining from the sky followed. Cortez flew in and threw twilight out just as the shop was reduced to ash as rockets impacted it.
Cortez awoke to twilight prodding him,"Terrarian, wake up we need your help!"
"Whh, how do you know what I am?"
"Library, but that's not important right now, There's a giant tank terrorizing Ponyville! Uhh, what's your name?"
"Cortez" was all he said before whipping out his Venus magnum and shot green streaks across the block. They impacted the monstrosities face, before Cortez flung himself upon it, tearing what was left of its face off. Underneath was a horrid mechanical scull. The tank launched a spray of bullets, followed by a brave of deadly presents. Then it unleashed hell, rockets were launched in all directions, the panicked resadints of Ponyville continued to scream as the town was turned into a relm of carnage. Cortez was flung to the ground as the santank prepared to send a barrage of gunfire upon Cortez.
"HAVE AT THEE MONSTER!!!!!!!!" Luna flung several large fireballs upon the tank, blasting it across the street and onto its side. Cortez finished it off by reaching his hand inside and ripping its face apart, before taking the gun off its arm.
He was at what looked like some sort of doll house, when a barrage of needles hit mp him in the back. The unholy scream returned as Cortez threw a piece of street lamp, impaling it. Cortez saw a rather amusing site inside of the boutique. A fashion crazed pony (one of the ones he had seen when he fought Discord) was trying to fight a gingerbread man. Cortez ended the battle by putting a bullet in the cookie's head.
Cortez chuckled at how he had taken it with one bullet, when a barrage of rockets struck him in the back! Cortez lay on the ground long enough for countless numbers of elves piled atop him, he threw his arms in every which way, but to no avail. The elves clung onto him before Twilight began to blast them off one by one, Cortez finished the rest with one firm swing of his hatchet,"Thanks!"
"No problem— Watch out!" Twilight yelled as Cortez was assaulted by an army of archers. He took cover behind a overturned dumpster, and pulled out a grenade.
"Duck!" He yelled as he hurled the explosive toward the hoard of archers. A massive cloud of flames burst from the place the bomb had landed, incinerating the army. Cortez stood up feeling rather proud of himself, when he was violently bashed across the street. He soon noticed a pink pony fending off a nutcracker with some cupcakes.
"Take that! And that!" She yelled as Cortez sliced the nutcracker in half, but the turned his attention to the yeti that had jumped in front of him. It yelled loudly as he went in for a punch. The yeti caught it and flipped him into the top floor of the shop that looked like a cake. His arm felt bad, but not broken and regardless of the pain he grabbed his new gun. He loaded the chamber and aimed it at the yeti, and then held the trigger. Green streaks erupted from the barrels striking the beast and killing it.
Cortez flew down and landed in the street only to be hit by a hellstorm of ice spikes! Cortez looked up to see a frost queen spinning in the air above him, raining down icicles. The queen swooped down but Cortez leaped out of the way.
As the queen began spinning Cortez and Luna noticed it was vulnerable. The both attacked it Luna using fireballs and Cortez using his rocket launcher. He was hit by the barrage of icicle spikes and sent across the street. He got up a few seconds later, to see that Luna had destroyed the ice queen, but then noticed 4 santanks surrounding him. The gears and treads clanked as they drove up arround him.
Twilight had gathered five of her six friends, and they quickly walked toward where Cortez was slowly standing up. Rainbow dash flew at one, and yet out a battle cry as she gave it a hard kick in the back of its head. Applejack proceeded to kick it in the back while rarity shot it in the back with magic.
The one tank they had attack turned its attention toward the five ponies, while they other three started turning their guns. The bullets roared off into the night, but Cortez was fast. He simply ducked down as two of them shot each other's faces off. He easily evaded the falling presents, but the rockets were killer. He stood up unmoving,"Come get me." He said coldly as the three santanks launched a storm of rockets, and Cortez ducked at just the right time. Two of the tanks were decimated by the barrage of rocket fire, and were reduced to a smouldering heap of metal.
Fluttershy was walking through Ponyville with mister bear, and when she came to see one tank backing her friends to a wall, she whispered to mr. bear,"Go get em!" Mr bear charged toward the santank, leaping on-top of it, and clawing its face off. It then penetrated its armoured back, and ripped it apart from the inside.
Fluttershy saw Cortez fighting another tank. She bravely walked to it and jumped in front of Cortez as he was about to burn it, and looked into its mechanical eyes. Normally when Fluttershy used the stare, she sees a past, a soul, but in these eyes, there was simply red death. And Fluttershy would have expirenced death had Cortez not thrown her aside. He was met by a painful wall of bullets, followed by falling presents. He was soon directly hit by several rockets that painful made him tumble across the street. His vision blurred as he lost consciousness.
Cortez woke up to the sound of beeping he then heard a distant voice,"I think he's waking up!" When he could see he noticed it was the Orange pony leaning over him, along with all five others. A few seconds later he truly realized what was going on.
He sat upright fast enough to make them all jump back, he reached for his Venus magnum,"who are you, where am I?"
"Your in the Ponyville hospital, we couldn't do much for you with that armour you've got there, half the time you disappeared. You died twice." The nurse standing in the corner told him.
"Then how am I alive now?"
"I couldn't run much tests with that armour you've got on, but every time you died you came back, it was like something wouldn't let you die."
The memories came flooding back. The yeti, the tanks, the frost moon, the rockets,"How long was I out?" He asked.
"About two weeks, that snowman moon must have brought winter early."
"Two weeks! I have to go, gunpowder Garry probably drank all my ale while I was gone!" Cortez pushed them all aside and stumbled out the door.
"Wait!" All the ponies called behind him, but he ignored them, his ale was on the line! As he pushed open the door of the hospital, he saw the results of the frost moon. Many houses and shops were broken of destroyed, but he ignored them and began to brake into a run, streaks of lighting shooting out behind him.
He ran for a few minutes, and crashed into a tree. The tree shatters as if it was a pile of compressed dirt. Cortez continued to run until he found his house. As he slowed down he noticed that his armour was damaged. He went to the goblins forge,"Hey, can you fix my armour, the frost moon last night damaged it some."
"Yes alright I will, have a nice day."
"You to." Cortez then went outside to find himself shivering. He decided to go get some other armour, and when he arrived at his armoury, he pulled some Titan armour off a mannequin. He then went to find Levi.
"When he did find him he told him,"Looks like you may have been wrong about it being mid summer, or the frost moon brought winter early."
"Yes, last night I noticed the house's defences were put to the test, had to have the goblin fix several of the Flame traps, overheated." He paused for a moment,"Gunpowder Garry's cannon got some good use though."
"The bunny cannon?"
"Both, and where were you for the past two weeks?"
"I woke up today to find the six ponies who saved the chaos lord's life, standing over me."
"Two weeks, what happened?"
Cortez thought for a moment,"I'm not sure. I remember 4 Santa-NK1s surrounding me, then the ponies fought one, a bear killed one, and I think got hit with a rocket strike."
"Sounds pretty bad, the goblin fixing your armour?" The guide asked.
"He is, and I guess I should get back to those ponies, thank them I guess." Cortez began running back to Ponyville, but not before checking his ale was still there.
Twilight and the other ventured into the everfree, cautiously as they knew the dangers that lurked. A bat swooped and Fluttershy cringed. Rainbow dash spoke,"Guys, I'm not sure we should be going in here."
"We have to find him, he can't have gone far." Twilight did not know how wrong she was. They continued walking,"Uggh this is taking to long!" Twilight the teleported them deeper into the Forrest.
"Twilight, please do warn us before doing that!" Rarity lectured, but twilight ignored her. They we're standing before a fenced in area, and inside the fence was a mansion the size of canterlot castle!
"It as big as canterlot castle!" Twilight was amazed, but then saw Cortez talking to a man. Then they saw Cortez enter the house.
"I-I think we should be getting back." Fluttershy said worriedly.
"She's right darling, we should be getting back."
"Oh, alright it's just too bad we won't get to find out more about this thing." Twilight sighed as she teleported them back.
Without his stealth mode, Cortez was much more visible, so he didn't bother running fast, as he searched for the six who had helped him. He came across Twilight going into the library. Cortez stopped her,"Hi, thanks for saving me when I got hit." He said as she jumped.
"Uhh, your welcome I guess, I have so many questions, what is Terraria like, Why did you want to kill discord, any idea why the moon was a snowman." He unicorn would have rambled on forever if Cortez had not stopped her.
"It's good, he was destroying this land and it was a frost moon, and I have some questions too, such as where am I?"
"You're in Equestria, Ponyville to be more specific, what are you doing here?"
"I came across a strange staff I had never seen, it said 'Baculum Equestria' on it, and when I used it, it sent me here." Cortez figured that the pony was just being so trusting because she wanted to know more about him, but he wasn't worried, he could take her in a fight.
"Hmm, never heard of that, I'll check the library sometime again." They went inside of golden oaks library and while Cortez looked at the books Twilight continued to ask him questions, surprised that he had returned.
Cortez considered the next few months uneventful, well except for the whole 'winter wrap up' thing. During those months he learned as much about the land as he could, became friends with many of the ponies and Twilight learned as much about him as she could.
One day Cortez lay on the warm grass, the warm sun beating down upon his un-armoured chest.
"Heya Cortezey, your welcome to Ponyville party is about to start!"
'Don't remind me' he thought as he threw his armour on,"Ok, I'm looking forward to it!" 'Ugg this is going to be worse than the frost moon' he lamented to himself.
As he walked to the party, he admired how fast the re-biluding of the town was going. Most of the houses and shops had been improved, from before the frost moon.
"So, you have party's where you come from?" Pinkie asked with excitement,"Because, I don't know how anypony could live without party's!"
"I think there's someone you should meet" Cortez smiled. He could never remember a time this peaceful, for him, every day have been survival.
"We're here, sugercube corner." Cortez remembered the building pinkie had just announced they had arrived at, it was the one where he had fought the yeti, and it looked completely rebuilt. "We had to rebuild it after the 'frosty moon' thing."
As they entered Cortez guessed every pony in the town was there. He saw every shade and size of pony, and noticed a stage at the front. Pinkie pushed him up to the front and spoke,"Heya every pony, this is our friend Cortez. He is the alien who appeared a few months ago" The crowed gasped,"But don't worry, he's friendly, now I don't know alllllllllll that much about him, so let's let him say a few words about himself!"
The lights dimmed and one shone upon him,"Well hello. My names Cortez I defeated the lord of chaos, saved the town from a frost moon and I guess that about it." Cortez did not know that the list would soon be extended. He left the stage and the lights went back on.
Just as Cortez was thinking this wouldn't be so bad, a green pony came up to him,"Hey, I'm Lyra, and are you a human? Because I know there real and every pony thinks I'm crazy." Cortez was glad his shroomite armour had been repaired, and he quickly vanished.
After reappearing, Twilight came up to him,"Hi, I was wondering if you would like to come to a picnic with us tomorrow, so we could all get to know you a bit better?"
Cortez thought for a moment,"Hmm, well I think I'll have to save this town from a hoard of zombies and stop a lord of cahos, but I'm sure can find some time in between then.
"Alright" Twilight laughed as the party continued.
Aside from the cutie mark crusaders, this was the most peaceful time of Cortez's life. All that would soon change.
A royal canterlot wedding, part 1
Cortez looked over at gunpowder Garry, and grabbed another bottle of ale,"This is the most peaceful time of my life, I don't see a land could be like this."
"Aye, but ye be forgetting the frost moon and discord, there are still the likes of those around here." He drunkely replied.
"True, but then why haven't there been? It's been two months, and nothing majorly bad has happened."
"Ye, it had been but what about those cutie mark crusaders Ye have been talking about?"
"Meh, they haven't done anything that could compare to the frost moon, oh wait expect for the time whe—"
"Isn't some picnic ye have to go to?" The pirate interrupted.
"Oh yes I forgot" he looked at the clock at the edge of the room,"It starts in 1 minute!" Cortez dashed out before the pirate could speak.
He arrived at the site, scattering birds and tearing up grass,"Well, I'm here."
"It is just gorgeous today isn't it." Rarity said happily.
Spike ran up,"Twilight, I have, a, letter!" He yelled as he colapsed into the ground and flames protruded from his mouth.
Twilight picked up the letter,"Dear Twilight, I'm sure you are as exited about the weddi as I am-Wedding?! I will be presiding over the ceremony, but would very much like you and your friends to help with the preparations for this wonderful occasion. Fluttershy, I would like you and your songbird choir to provide the music."
"Oh my goodness! What an honor!"
Twilight continued,"Pinkie Pie, I can think of no one more qualified than you to host the reception.
Applejack, you will be in charge of the catering for the reception."
"Well, color me pleased as punch!" Applejack exclaimed.
"Rainbow Dash, I would very much appreciate it if you could perform a sonic rainboom as the bride and groom complete their I do's." Cortez wondered what that was.
"Yes!"
Twilight kept reading,"Rarity, you will be responsible for designing the dresses for the bride and her bridesmaids."
"Princess Celestia wants me to wedding dress? For a Canterlot wedding!" Rarity said excitedly.
"And as for you, Twilight, you will be playing the most important role of all: making sure that everything goes as planned.
See you all very soon, Princess Celestia." Twilight finished,"But whose getting married?"
"Oh wait, I was probably suppose to give you this one first." Spike handed Twilight another letter.
"Princess Celestia cordially invites you to the wedding of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, and my brother?!" Twilight exclaimed.
"Your brother's getting married? Congratulations, Twilight, that's great news!"
"Yeah, great news that I just got from a wedding invitation! Not from my brother, but from a piece of paper! Thanks a lot, Shining Armour." Twilight said sarcastically,"I mean, really, he couldn't tell me personally? Hey, Twilight, just thought you should know I'm making a really big decision that changes everything, Oh, nevermind, you'll hear about it when you get the invitation." Twilight continued,"Princess Mi Amore Cadenza? Who in the hoof is that?! Twilight? Are you okay? Sorry, it's just that Shining Armor and I have always been so close."
Cortez watched as they continued talking,"So I guess I'll just come to Canterlot and hang around town, seeing as I'll be in this land a while, I might as well see the sights."
"Yeah, or you could come hang out at the bachelor party." Spike said and to Cortez it sounded almost like he was drunk.
"Sure, I'll check that out."
The next day on the train rainbow dash was exuberant,"A sonic rainboom? At a wedding?! Can you say "best wedding ever"!"
"Best wedding ever!" Pinkie pie yelled as they passed through a tunnel.
"So you all get to help with the big fancy wedding, but I'm the one who gets to host the bachelor party! I have just one question, what's a bachelor party?" Spike asked as the rest laughed and Cortez was becoming unsure if he wanted to be at that party.
Cortez was too amazed by the city billet off a mountain to hear the rest of the conversation. As they arrived he heard something about a shield around the city, and continued walking with them.
When they approached the pony he assumed was shining armour, he tuned out for most of the conversation, but his ears perked up when he heard something about a threat and how he was making he shield,"Wait, did you say something about a threat? If you did just tell me the details and ill take care of it."
"Whose this? Sorry that's classified." Shining armour said firmly.
"Ok, take the more difficult way then, the names Cortez, I'm not from around here."
"Nice to meet you, what are you?"
"I am a Terrarian, and if you'll share some info about the threat, I haven't killed anything in weeks and I'm be happy to take care of it for you." Cortez offered.
"Can I talk with twile for a second?" He walked a few steps away,"Twilight are you sure about this guy, I mean did you hear him?"
"Yeah, but he means no harm to us, he saved Ponyville on multiple occasions."
"But if he's so powerful how can he be so good, absolute power corrupts absolutely."
"I don't think he has absolute power, some of the things that appeared when the moon turned into a snowman posed a threat to him." Twilight replied.
"Alright i trust your judgment."
Cortez was rather uninterested in any wedding plans, so he went off to explore the city. He flew around for hours trying to comprehend how it was supported.
It was nightfall by the time he went back, and he saw the six ponies plus spike sitting around a table, arguing about what cadence was like.
"Bet I can guess what you're all thinking! Cadance is the absolute worst bride-to-be ever." Twilight told them all
"Twilight, whatever are you talking about? Cadance is an absolute gem!" Rarity said in shock.
"Rarity, she was so demanding!"
Well of course she was! Why shouldn't she expect the very best on her wedding day?"
"Applejack, did you know that after she told you how much she just 'love-love-loved' your hors-d'oeuvres, she threw them in the trash?"
"Aw, she was probably just trying to spare my feelings."
"No, she was just being fake, and totally insincere!"
"She did raise her voice at one of my birds during rehearsal." Fluttershy added quietly
"See? Rude!"
"But he was singing really off-key."
"Pinkie Pie, you had to have noticed how Cadance treated- Nevermind." She stopped knowing what pinkie would say.
"Rainbow Dash, you're with me, right?"
"Sorry Twi, been too busy prepping for my sonic rainboom to pay much attention to the bride's bad attitude." Cortez figured rainbow dash didn't want to take a side
"Cortez what do you think?"
"Well, I wasn't around so I'm not taking a side." He said not really wanting to be caught in the middle of an argument.
"The princess is about to get married. I'm sure any negative behaviour she might be displaying is simply the result of nerves." Rarity told Twilight.
"And I'm sure it's the result of being an awful pony who doesn't deserve to even know Shining Armor let alone marry him!"
"Think maybe you're being just a tiny bit possessive of your brother?"Applejack suggested.
"I am not being possessive! And I am not taking it out on Cadance! You're all just too caught up in your wedding planning to notice that maybe there shouldn't even be a wedding!"
Cortez could see a potential clash coming as Twilights brother walked up,"Twilie! Your big brother's looking pretty good, don't you think? Everything okay?
Cortez slipped out of the argument with his stealth mode as he saw the cadence and shining go into a room. He was not ruling out the possibility of Twilight being right, so he entered, his armour turning him extremely translucent.
"I'm listening, I'm listening"
"I thought I made it perfectly clear I didn't want you to wear that."
"This was my favourite uncle's."
"And?"
"And I think I should wear it."
"Are you disagreeing with me?"
"I guess I am!"
Cortez watched as the bride to be used some sort of magic on him
"Oh dear, are you getting another one of your headaches? Feeling better?" Cortez would have killed the princess on site, but decided to wait.
"She isn't just unpleasant and rude, she's downright evil!" He heard as he flew off into the night 'so she is evil, I guess the best choice is to interrogate her, then decided what to do.'
Cortez only stayed at the bachelor party for a while, then was too drunk to assassinate anyone, and saw Luna leaving the bachlor et party,"I see you left the party too."
"That we did."
"Not fitting in?"
"Yes."
"Me too, they also don't have any ale."
Luna chuckled,"What do you think about cadence?"
Choosing not to tell her about what he had seen he answered,"I haven't seen much of her, so I don't know. But I want to know how this city stays supported."
"Ah yes, it was done with great magic and architecture."
"I know a thing or two about architecture, my mansion now sits deep in the everfree Forrest as you call it, but my magic dosent really help me build, well except for the ice rod."
"I have lived long but not heard of these things, tell me, what is your land like."
"It is full of dangers and wonders. Overall I like it."
"Sounds nice. Farewell Terrarian, we must go for our midnight fly."
Cortez watched as she flew out the open window, as the moonlight shone into the room. He soon
Luna was flying into the night when she heard a demonic voice,"Hello nightmare moon."
Luna jumped, looked around and replied,"Thou must not call us that name."
"Oh there will be no need, the real nightmare is coming, and it's coming soon." Luna saw a flash of light then darkness, and she fell down into the royal canterlot gardens.
Cortez lay down on a couch and went to sleep, unprepared for the months of peace to end!
A royal canterlot wedding part 2
Cortez awoke with a headache. He looked around and blinked. As he got up the memories came back to him. The bachlor party, Luna, the wedding, Cadence! He still had to kill her! Checking the time, he sprinted off. He herd singing,"This day is going to be perfect."The voice proclaimed,"The kind of day of which I've dreamed since I was small." Cortez continued to run towards the voice hoping he wasn't to late,"Everypony will gather 'round, Say I look lovely in my gown, What they don't know is that I have fooled them all!"
'You missed one' Cortez thought as he sprinted toward the voice.
"I could care less about the dress, I won't partake in any cake." Cortez reached the sound of the voice and hid behind the door to the room,"Vows, well I'll be lying when I say. That through any kind of weather I'll want us to be together, The truth is I don't care for him at all" Cortez vanished."No I do not love the groom!" He drew his pistol!"In my heart there is no room!" Cortez stepped toward the door."But I still want him to be all mine!"
Cortez kicked down the door,"Prepare to die!"
"To die today, my apologies, I have other plans!" The changeling sang.
"I care not about your plans, you will die before you scream!" Cortez circled the changing.
"No I will not!" The changeling stopped singing and green fire erupted around Cortez, causing him to sink into the floor,"haha." The high and menacing voice laughed
Cortez got up off the ground. He looked around and once again heard singing,"We must escape before it's too late." Cortez walked toward the sound,"Find a way to save the day, Hope, I'll be lying if I say "I don't fear that I may lose him To one who wants to use him, Not care for, love, and cherish him each day" Cortez reached for his glinting Venus magnum,"For I oh so love the groom, All my thoughts he does consume" Cortez packed the gun with bullets,"Oh, Shining Armor, I'll be there very soon."
"Last time I heard singing, I got sent here, this time I won't hesitate." He pointed the gun directly at Cadence.
Twilight jumped in front of the princess,"No, she's the real one. The one you must have saw is a fake!"
"It's true, she's a changing!"
"Ok I believe you, but we need to get out of here, now!"
As they got into the mine cart, Twilight pushed it down the track. It zoomed around, up and down. Cortez herd the voice by the armours enhancements, that witch could rival that of an ever scream,"Finally the moment has arrived! For me to be one lucky bride!"
Princess Cadance sang,"Oh, the wedding we won't make, He'll end up marrying a fake! Shining Armor will be…"
They heard the unholy sound of Chrysalis,"…mine, all mine." She laughed demonicly.
Minutes later the sound of an organ reached Cortez's ears, and he heard the voice of Celestia,"Mares and gentlecolts, we are gathered here today to witness the union of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Shining Armor."
Princess Cadance cried out in sadness,"Oh, we're never going to save him."
Twilight Sparkle noticed the exit,"We will. We just have to find... There!" She teleported the three of them to the ledge
"Next time, warn me before you do that!" The world stopped spinning and Cortez saw three mares
"You're not going anywhere." The said in unison.
Cortez drew his pistol,"That won't be necessary." Cadence pushed his arm down and through flowers as the three mares dove to retrieve it.
"I want it!" They all three dove to get it.
"Princess Cadance and Shining Armor, it is my great pleasure to pronounce you–"
Erupting gunshots echoed from the hallway as Twilight Sparkle yelled,"Stop!"
The ponies around began to chatter as Cortez aimed his gun.
He fake Cadence said to herself,"Ugh! Why does she have to be so possessive of her brother?" She corrected herself,"Why does she have to ruin my special day?"
Princess Cadance yelled to her,"Because it's not your special day! It's mine!"
The ponies around gasped, "This is not you special day, it's your last!" Cortez said darkly.
"What? But how did you escape my bridesmaids?"
"I wanted to shoot them, but Cadence was creative."
"The care a lot about flowers." Cadenced smirked.
Queen Chrysalis looked at her,"Hmph. Clever. But you're still too late."
Applejack stuttered,"I-I don't understand. How can there be two of 'em?"
Princess Cadance responded,"She's a changeling. She takes the form of somepony you love and gains power by feeding off your love for them."
Cortez watched as a pillar of flames erected beside Celestia,"Right you are, Princess. And as queen of the changelings, it is up to me to find food for my subjects. Equestria has more love than any place I've ever encountered. My fellow changelings will be able to devour so much of it that we will gain more power than we have ever dreamed of!"
Princess Cadance looked around,"They'll never get the chance! Shining Armor's protection spell will keep them from ever even reaching us!"
Queen Chrysalis chuckled,"Oh, I doubt that. Isn't that right, dear?"
Shining Armor only responded with,"Mm-hmm."
Queen Chrysalis: Ah, ah, ah. Don't want to go back to the caves, now do you? Ever since I took your place, I've been feeding off Shining Armor's love for you. Every moment he grows weaker and so does his spell. Even now, my minions are chipping away at it."
Queen Chrysalis laughed,"He may not be my husband, but he is under my total control now!"
Twilight Sparkle and Princess Cadance gasped.
Queen Chrysalis chuckled,"And I'm sorry to say, unable to perform his duties as captain of the Royal Guard."
Princess Cadance cried out,"Not my Shining Armor!"
Queen Chrysalis stated her plans,"Soon, my changeling army will break through. First, we take Canterlot. And then, all of Equestria!"
Princess Celestia defied,"No. You won't. You may have made it impossible for Shining Armor to perform his spell, but now that you have so foolishly revealed your true self, I can protect my subjects from you!"
Beams erupted from both their horns, colliding in the centre. At first it looked like Cortez would go a day without killing, but that changed!
Twilight Sparkle cried,"Princess Celestia!" The their princess colapsed.
Queen Chrysalis laughed menacingly,"Ah! Shining Armor's love for you is even stronger than I thought! Consuming it has made me even more powerful than Celestia!"
Cortez clicked his gun,"You forgot about me!"
"Actually I did not, you see if you stay here to fight me, the changelings will overrun canterlot! Muhaahahah!"
"Fine." Cortez ran and dove out the window, fired a few rounds at the changeling queen. She erected a barrier to deflect them as the glass shattered. Cortez fell toward the streets below, but threw his hover bord underneath him. He landed on it and looked up. He saw the barrier shatter above him, as the Changelings flew down in green streaks of fire. Only most of them did not make it to the ground. Cortez pulled out the gun he had obtained during the frost moon and loaded it.
Green Flashes erupted from the barrels of the gun, unleashing carnage upon the changelings. If not for there sheer numbers, they would have had no chance. The bullets whizzed and flew in all directions, finding there way to the enemys and embedding themselves into the changelings sculls.
Not wanting more of the to reach the ground, he set the chain gun up so it would continue shooting, taking out most of the changeling's that rocketed toward the ground.
As one hit the ground, Cortez threw his fist up, knocking a changeling's face off, then hurled a holy hand grenade towards a cluster of them. The course rang out through the street as Cortez ducked behind a dumpster as the bomb shattered all that lie in the street. Bits of hot glass flew towards Cortez, and had it not been for his armour, the glass would have killed him.
Twilight and the other ponies dodged streaks of changelings as they ran to get the elements, but there were to late. The changlings reached the ground and the clash began. It was only seconds later the a mighty roar rose from behind the ponies. They looked up as green flashes wizzed above them, finding their way to the changlings.
Twilight yelled as the barriar shatterd"Go, go!"
Rainbow Dash looked up as changlings rocketed towards the ground,"Looks like we're gonna have to do this the hard way." she looked and saw a copy of herself,"How did you...?"
Twilight Answerd,"They're changelings, remember?" She looked around,"Don't let them distract you. We have to get to the Elements of Harmony. They're our only hope."
changelings hissed as the clash began. Applejack looked at the cahos,"Ok, this is just gettin' weird." Not knowing she was the real one, twiligh pushed her to the ground,"Real me! Real me!"
Pinkie Pie laughed at the imatation,"Do me! Do me! Meh, I've seen better." She punched the bug.
Cortez ran across rooftops with a mighty battle cry, and threw a grenade down into some changlings. But he didn't whatch what was in front of him, and he slammed into a taller building. Changlings surrounded him, ready to strike. Cortez lie on the ground in defeat, as they carried him off.
Princess Cadance struggled," You won't get away with this! Twilight, her friends and the Terrarian will–.
She was inturupted by the doors opening. Cortez and the six ponies were push Queen Chrysalis laughed,"You were saying? You do realize the reception's been cancelled, don't you? Go! Feed!" The doors closed as Chrysalis laughed,"It's funny, really. Twilight here was suspicious of my behavior all along. Too bad the rest of you were too caught up in your wedding planning to realize those suspicions were correct!"
"Hey, don't forget I almost put a bullet in your head!" Cortez reminded.
"Oh right, from what I had heard about you I didn't think it would be this easy to capture you, well, now you are the one who will be dieing.".
Applejack sighed,"Sorry, Twi. We should've listened to you."
Twilight replied,"It's not your fault. She fooled everypony."
Queen Chrysalis looked at her "Hmm, I did, didn't I?"
Cortez decided to wait as the changlings queen sang,"This day has been just perfect
The kind of day of which I've dreamed since I was small
Everypony I'll soon control
Every stallion, mare, and foal
Who says a girl can't really have it all?"
"ME!" Cortez yelled loud enough to make all everyone in the room jump back, as he drew his gun.
The queen hid her terror,"Pfft, there are too many changlings, not even you can stop them!"
"I can still stop you." Cortez fired directly at her head, but the queen reacted a shield to stop them. A rocket impacted the shield, shattering it and throwing the changlings queen Into a wall. Cortez pointed his gun and walked toward her,"She's out!"
Twilight Yelled,"Quick! Go to him while you still have the chance!"
Cadence snapped him out of his trance,"Wha– where... huh? Is...is the wedding over?
Queen Chrysalis hit Cortez with beam of magic,"It's all over!"
Cortez sputterd,"Your spell! Perform your spell!"
Queen Chrysalis laughed,"What good would that do? My changelings already roam free."
Shining Armor tried to use his magic,"No! My power is useless now. I don't have the strength to repel them."
Cortez got off the ground, but his pistol was still on the other side of the room,"Sorry, I don't have mana potions with me."
Cadance looked at her soon to be husband,"Then my love will give you strength!"
Queen Chrysalis chuckled,"What a lovely but absolutely ridiculous sentiment." Three gunshots erupted form the other side of the room, but Cortez, forgetting he was using normal bullets, missed his target, and instead the shots tore the queens leg clean off!
Queen Chrysalis cried out from the pain, that distracted her from stopping Cadence and shinning armour,"Noooooo!" Queen Chrysalis and the other Changelings screamed as they were replled by the blast of love,"I will have my revenge, I swear Terrarian I will have my revenge!" But that threat would not be fulfilled. Cortez had aimed with precision this time, and the queen of the changlings received five bullets to the face.
Cortez closed his eyes in victory,"Stay dead this time." He whispered to himself. He expected to feel victories and happy. But instead he felt like a heartless monster. He took a deep breath and saw that no one else had noticed.
Princess Celestial looked at Cadence who was checking her for ingeriues,"Don't worry about me. I'm fine. You have a real wedding to put together." Cadance gulped.
The next day, Cortez went to the wedding. He did not expect to be invited, but he had received an Invite the previous night.
birds chirped, cymbals crashed. Cortez sat down.
Princess Celestia spoke,"Mares and gentlecolts, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of the real Princess Mi Amore Cadenza–"
Cadance inturupted,"Princess Cadance is fine."
Princess Celestia continued,"Hm. The union of Princess Cadance and Shining Armor. The strength of their commitment is clear. The power of their love, undeniable. May we have the rings please? I now pronounce you mare and colt."
Cortez was surprised to find himself cheering, along with the rest of the ponies in the room.
Shining Armor and Princess Cadance kissed.
Rainbow Dash yelled "Best... wedding... ever!" As Cortez saw a disk of rainbow light explod in the sky.
Princess Luna walked in, she had been recovering in secret all day,"Hello, everypony. Did I miss anything?"
Pinkie Pie squeeled,"Let's get this party started!"
Twilight Began singing,"Love is in bloom
A beautiful bride, a handsome groom,
Two hearts becoming one
A bond that cannot be undone because
Love is in bloom
A beautiful bride, a handsome groom
I said love is in bloom
You're starting a life and making room
For us."
Shinning armour came up to Cortez, who had mostly been sitting off to the side,"Hey, thanks."
"For what." He considerd telling him about the queen being dead, but decided not to."Saving the world for a third time?
"Yeah. At first I didn't trust you, but now I don't see how I couldn't." He paused,"I'm sorry."
"It's fine." Cortez sighed as he watched them pull away in a carriage.
Rarity jumped for flowers that were thrown out if the carriage,"IT'S MINE! Oof! Ahaha..."
"Love is in bloom
A beautiful bride, a handsome groom
I said love is in bloom
You're starting a life and making room
For us, (For us... For us... Aah...)"
Twilight met up with the other ponies,"Now this was a great wedding."
Cortez came up to them,"Hey, mind if I join you?"
"Sur—" She was inturupted by a large bang.
"Hey there me hearties, mind if we join ye?" Gunpowder Garry and All the other had come in a large blimp.
Confetti rained down,"Let's get this party started!"
"Pinkie, that's who I said you should meet." Cortez looked at the pink pony.
Over the next few hours it felt a lot more like a party to Cortez, the pirate had brought truckloads of ale. The goblin had rigged up some rapid fire confetti guns, while bunny was talking to pinke. Cortez found he was enjoying himself, but still did not find the victory he craved. He had no idea what he had brought upon equestria by killing the changling queen.
Luna sat above the party. She was not much for partying, but liked to watch.
"Hello Luna, I see you have concealed it."
"Me, concealed what?"
"Don't pretend you don't know, you and I both know that the nightmare will be upon us soon."
Princess Insectum sat in the hive, awaiting the news that equestria was taken. A wounded soldier approched her throne,"Y-y-your highness." He sputterd.
"Yes what is it."
"I regret to inform you, the queen is d-d-d-dead."
"What, no it can't be!" The changling princess roared.
"It is, she was killed by the Terrarian."
"N-n-no, this cannot be!" She hurled a stone at him in fury,"How do you know this!"
"Miss, I saw it myself."
The new queen let out a cry, as she cast a spell upon the worrier, burning him to death,"I will have my revenge Terrarian, and soon! General! Prepare the armies, as soon as we are at full strength, we will attack once again!"
Cortez awoke to see a strange ceiling. He stepped out of bed and stepped over to the balcony. Instead of seeing Levi's garden, He saw canterlot. A burning Canterlot. Great stones colided with the ground and ponies were crushed beneath them. Fire and explosions erupted from all around the city. He watched in horror as ponies were dropped down in to crevices that opened up in the city. He wanted more than anything to help them, but he could not. Some force was preventing him, his feet refused to move themselves from their place on the floor.
His feet stayed planted until the floor gave a mighty lurch. It ripped open as he fell toward the carnage below. He landed in a street of death, and then the worst happened. The entire canterlot castle fell upon him! He tried to scream but could not. The castle landed upon him and all went black.
Cortez awoke for real this time with sweat on the inside of his armour and his gun drawn. After the changling invasion he had taken to sleeping with it on, although his house would hold them off for some time.
He passed by the calendar in his hallway. It had been a week. One week since the Canterlot invasion. Great swarms of ponies had coursed through the streets rebuilding and cleaning. He walked into his fridge, and grabbed some Turkey.
As he sat down in the dining room next to his bedroom, he shivered as he recalled the dream,'it could have happened. If i wasn't there.' He had been trying to figure out how to leave this planet, but now was not so sure he wanted to. The screams of chrysalis still were fresh in his mind. No matter what he did to try to get it off his mind, he could not.
Glancing at the calendar again, he noticed it was Thursday,'Chess day' he sighed,'Time to get whipped'.
After finishing his breakfast, he walked over to the main living room. Levi was already sitting there with the chess board set up.
"Losers go first." Levi motioned for Cortez to move.
"Ha ha funny." Cortez slid a pawn forwards two, Levi moved the pawn in front of his queen. Cortez moved the pawn in front of his other castle. Levi place moved his bishop. Cortez cam up with a plan. He proceded to move the pawn in front of his king, and at the moment he removed his hand, Levi put his queen out of commission.
"That one gets ya every time!" The guide laughed.
"Well, at least I get a consolation prize." Cortez said as he took the bishop off the board.
"Yeah, call it whatever you like."
After ten minutes Cortez had lost one castle, both bishops, his queen and both Knights,"Not as good at chess as you are at stopping invasions, Checkmate!"
He checked the clock,"Ten minutes? I think that's a new record!" He shuddered at the thought of the invasion. The comman belief that he had not killed chrysalis still haunted him.
"So, what do you plan to do today?"
"Probably find out if there's anyone in Ponyville that I can beat at chess, but other than that I can't think of anything."
"Good luck, you're gonna need it!"
"I'm sure I will find someone who I can beat at chess."
"Just tell Ye self that." The pirate stumbled in,"Even I can beat Ye at chess!"
"Let's see about that!"
While Cortez and Garry played chess, insectum went for a visit to her science division.
"Your majesty." A changling ran into the room,"we found something in canterlot!"
"If it's the body of the Terrarian, you're the third one this week." She said uninterestedly.
"No no no, but it's something that should help us to get that."
"What did you find?" The now queen said much more intrigued.
"This." The drone pulled out Cortez's chain gun,"We found it perched on a balcony, we believe it killed thousands of changlings. Other than the Terrarian himself, it was the biggest barrier in taking Canterlot."
"This-this is something of interest." The changling touched it's smooth surface,"I want to to learn how to use it, then I want a thousand like it!"
"Yes queen!" The changling ran off into the hallway.
"Soon, I will avenge my mother!"
"And, I lost." Cortez looked down at the chess board.
"He he he, even I can beat Ye!" The pirate gloated.
"You need some more practice, how about try some of the folks around Ponyville, like at the pub i found."
"You found a pub? There are ponies there who drink? Didn't think that there would be a pub here." Cortez was surprised. He haden't thought about trying some other drinks, none of them had compared to what he had so far, but it was worth a try.
"There's ale there, that I know, but I'm not sure how it tasted. Ye see, I think I drank a bit much to remember..."
"In that case, it's probably good, bye!" Cortez sped off into the Forrest.
"Hey, er Levi, do Ye what a game of chess?"
Cortez searched the town for the pub, and after an hour of looking, found it. To his disappointment it was closed until that night. So he set off for Twilight's library.
He got there in less than a minute thanks to his lighting boots, and he knocked on the door. It swung open and twilight stood in the doorway,"Hi, I was wondering if you would have a game of chess, I can't seem to beat anyone."
"Uhh, sure." Twilight answerd, surprised at his request,"I'll get the board set up."
"How much progress have you made." Queen insectum demanded
"We, have found a way to use it, as I will demonstrate." The changeling scientist pointed the gun in the direction of the dummy. Dozens of blasts erupted from the gun as bits of metal and fire burst out of it. Insectum threw up a barrier as the scientist ducked for cover.
"Is that what should be happening?" She groaned looking at the undamaged dummy.
"The gun fires, but the bullets cannot withstand the force of the explosion that should propel them towards a targate."
"I want it to work, not spray shrades everywhere." She growled menacingly.
"Our second prototype is in progress, don't worry, it will make our armies unstoppable!"
"Well, I'm guessing there is no one I can beat at chess." Cortez sighed as he lay down his King.
"Sure there must be someone."
"That's what everyone says, but oh well, I noticed there was a Ponyville bar, might you and your friends be interested in going?"
"I'm sure they will, what time."
"9:00, I'll be there." Cortez sped back home.
Cortez left the house and soon after bumped into the CMC.
"Heya, we thought we would get our cutie marks in detective skills, but we didn't. Oh right we figured out you were the green streaks that saved us in the Forrest a while back." Scootloo rambled.
"Yeah that was in the first hour I arrived here."
"But the streaks were green, and you're suit is blue." Applebloom pointed out.
"That's because I loaded my gun with green bullets, and that particular type cannot miss a targate."
"Thanks for saving us from the timber wolves." Sweetie belle spoke.
"No problem, but I need to be going now, bye."
After grabbing a few bottles of ale (in case the ones there were no good) Cortez ran to where he thought the Ponyville bar was located. He had gone to the wrong place a few times, but eventually found it. His arms were full so he kicked open the door. Or rather kicked down the door by accident.
As the ponies saw him come in, they raised their glasses and Applejack spoke,"Ah propose a toast, to cortez not killing chrysalis!"
Cortez tried to mask the agony the statement had caused. He imagine every scenario of telling them,"Sorry, I'm not feeling well, got to go!"
"Cortez, what's wrong!" Twilight yelled to the allyway
Cortez blindly ran through the Forrest. He stopped beside a tree breathing hard. For an hour he sat there, before slumping over and going to sleep.
It was late in the night when he awoke to the feeling of an evil presence watching him. He stumbled over to a clearing in the Forrest. 'Wait' he stopped 'There was no clearing here before' as he approched it he saw a green flame was consuming it. Red streaks flashed across the sky. There was only one monster that would cause this destruction.
"The two eyes."
Cortez sped across the Forrest to Ponyville, and all the while felt as if he was being watched. When he was about to arrive he saw a massive explosion overhead. He picked up speed until he reached Ponyville.
"Hey, guess you must have saw the monster too, but don't worry, we already took care of it." Twilight informed cortez as she examined a purple rock,"This mineral is unlike I've ever seen before, it's like it's pulsing with dark energy!"
"Yeah, anyways, we kicked some major flank!" Rainbow dash gloated.
"Uhhh, is it safe to come out now?" Fluttershy poked her head from around a corner.
"No, it's no-"
"I'm glad it's gone now, it looked absolutely gastly."
"It was some sort of floating eye, and it seemed to summon mini versions of itself."
"That wasent th-" Cortez tried to say.
"And without the elements of harmony to-" Rainbow dash was interrupted as a gunshot erupted into the air.
"That wasn't the monster I saw, it's something much worse, it was-" a lazer rained down from the sky and Cortez was thrown to the ground.
"Why didn't you tell us there was something else!" Applejack dove out of the way as another beam landed where she had been.
"I tried to, but I was interrupted by-" a horrifying scream sounded as two massive eyes, held together by one small string flew down, one smashing through a house.
"Don't get hit by the green flames! I don't have antidote for anyone!"
"What green flames?" Rarity's question was soon answerd as several streaks of green plummeted towards the earth.
Cortez aimed his gun in the direction of Spasmitizim, and blinding flashes shot from the barrels of his gun. The beast turned itself towards him, and was met with a claw to where it's face would be if it had one.
Meanwhile pinkie pie was sitting atop a shelf filled with pies. Retinazer phased through the wall and looked in the direction of pinkie pie, only to be it by a large blueberry pie,"Take that!" She threw another,"And that!"
Retinazer shook the pie off and phazed through the wall again,'That's new Cortez watched it pass through the wall like it was nothing. He hurled a smoke bomb directly at it, and hit it with a series of rockets. Retinazer shook the smoke away and took to the sky's.
It was hit seconds later with a sniper bullet, and then the what now appeared to be metre casing, fell towards the street.
"We need to take the fight out of the town!" Cortez yelled to Twilight who was rapidly fireing spells at Spasmitizim.
"But how?" She yelled back.
"Still working on that!" Cortez flung his possessed hatchet out. As he saw Spasmitizim crash through a building, shooting green flames at him, he flung it in the general direction of the green eye, and less than a second later caught it again,"I have an idea, Rainbow dash, can you get Retinazer as far as you can from here?"
"They look the same, which one are you talking about?"
"Lazer shooting one!"
"I got this" Rainbow dash flew towards the eye, and began to circle it while the eye tried to hit her with its beams, but the cyan Pegasus was too fast. Seeing the eye was focused on her, she began to fly in the opposite direction of the other eye.
Spasmitizim fired at Cortez, who took cover behind a dumpster. It was soon no longer suitable for that propose, so he dove into the street to avoid the next ball of fire. Shooting a rocket into the pupil of the eye, it was launched backwards. But then the eye spurted a stream of flames, directly at him! This time whipping out his shield he blocked the stream, and noticed it was time.
Detonating a smoke bomb, he shot up and grabbed the fleshy cord connecting the two eyes. Pulling out his nights edge, he began to attempt to slice the cord. At the same time, in order to escape the flames, he tried to climb along the rope to get away. But there was no escape, the giant eye spewed flames at him, hitting the cord that bonded the two eyes. The cord burst into a green flame, as well as the eyes connected to it.
By that time they had gotten close to Retinazeron the outskirts of Ponyville,"Rainbow dash, go back to the town!" She complied just in time to avoid a stream of lasers,'Theses eyes as stronger than before'
He dropped down just in time to avoid streams of lasers and fire. But before hitting the ground, he tossed his hoverbord beneath him. It carried him up, to the point where the lights on it began to grow dim, and he let himself freefall.
The six ponies below watched the twins zoom up to meet him, but as Cortez felt the air rush past him, he pulled out something he rarely used. A holy hand grenade. He threw it down, and straightend himself into a dive. The twins were left just above him as the course rang out. The two eyes widened as the explosion scorched the area where their faces would be if they had had them.
Cortez continued falling until he was nearly at the ground, but then caught himself with his lightning boots. His decent slowed until he was just a few feet from the ground, then he dropped the rest of the way.
"Good job."
"Well done."
"I wonder if it dropped more of that ore?"
"Watch out!"
All seven of them took cover, except for cortez who grabbed the string connecting the two eyes, and was pulled upward. As he was halted upwards, he popped the cap off of a star shaped potion. He drank the sharp tasting potion.
The eyes turned towards him, and their pupils grew. Cortez looked down and heard all six ponies yelling to him.
"Darling get down from there, will you?"
"What are you doing, you'll get yourself Killed!"
"Umm, mabey that's not such a good place to be."
"Are you joking, what do you think you're doing there!"
"If you don't get out of there faster than an apple falls from a tree, you're dead!"
But Cortez ignored them all and held on. Streams of lasers and flames crossed paths right over him. He let out a horrid scream as the cursed flames began to burn through his armour, and the lasers passed all around him. He continued to hold in until Retinazer had the same debuff, and threw another holy hand grenade at Spasmitizim. He dropped just as the explosion went off, and hit the grass.
"Cortez!" The ponies and spike watched as cortez smashed a blue bottle beside him. Instantly a explosion of blue flames erupted around him and he was gone.
"Where did he go?"
"I do that sometimes, just without the bottle and flames!" Pinkie pie demonstrated by appearing several meaters away.
In the middle of his house, the same blue explosion erupted out of the air. Cortez appeared in the hallway.
He crawled over to a table, and chugged a greater healing potion. Almost instantly all burn marks on him vanished. Soon after the flames subsided,'Now I need to get my armour to the goblin, tomorrow."
Cortez drifted off to sleep without bothering to remove his damaged armour.
Cortez stepped out of bed. The clock showed it was still night. He walked towards the deck that protruded out of the wall of his house. The night was beautiful, but something seemed different. As Cortez swung his head up to look at the moon, it had a shadow cast over it, in the shape of a circle.
His eyes widened, he had only seen that once before, he whirled around to see words engraved into the wall,"THE NIGHTMARE IS COMING SOON!!!" He jumped towards his armour stand, but received a throwing knife to the back. He fell to his knees as one word rang in his ears,"Soon!" Cortez collapsed onto his front the word still ringing in his mind,'soon, soon, soon, soon." Getting slower and softer and softer as he lay on the ground, bleeding.
Cortez awoke, and looked over at the wall, there was nothing engraved upon it,'It was only a dream.' He thought to himself. It was midday, as he got up he felt pain everywhere, he fell back onto the bed,'Guess the healing potion wasn't perfect.'
He reached for another and drank it. The pain subsided almost instantly,'guess I should get my armour to .goblin' he thought as he stepped over to his closet. He flicked the lever to the side of the large door and with a soft creaking noise it swung open.
His closet had close to a hundred mannequins, all holding a suit of armour or set of vanity items. He grabbed a set of spectre armour, as well as goast wings. He put the robes on and soon felt the magic flowing through him,
'I wonder, if I had used that staff with more power, what would have happened?' Deciding it wasn't the best idea, because last time it had teleported him across the galaxy, and he could have landed somewhere without air!
'Just use this armour until my shroomite armour is fixed, then switch back it shouldn't take Sarx to lo to repair.'
He hauled the damaged armour to the forge. He could feel the heat penetrating his skin before he entered.
"Oh hello, I heard about last night, are your alright?" The goblin asked in his odd voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine, but my armour can't take healing potions like I can."
"Oh my, it does look damaged, I should have it repaired in a few days."
Cortez left the heat of the workshop, and flew to Ponyville.
"Have you got so thing good to tell me?" The now queen of the changelings asked.
"Well, I have repaired it so far, but it is no where near ready for usage." The changeling bowed low.
"Show me."
The changeling pushed several levers on the wall, and then connected a few wires, then pushed one final button. The gun began to spin, flashing sparks as it did,"something was found during what happened recently in Ponyville, one of our spies found it." The scientist yelled over the noise of the chain gun.
Three blasts of green were launched our of the barrel of the gun, each hitting the rock in different places. When they collided with it they smashed apart, leaving green flames. A shard of one of the bullets struck a nearby changeling, who immediately screamed as they were consumed by the flames consuming him.
"Impressive, but three shots is not going to help us rule equestria, I need thousands." The queen spoke slowly.
"Yes my queen." Queen Insectum left the room with the other changeling still burning on the ground.
As Cortez zoomed across the dark Forrest, he saw something flying. A dark beam was headed straight towards him, so he jumpted out of the way and saw it hit the ground. Another one struck him and he fell to the ground. Looking up he saw it was a corrupter,"Aguamenti!" The water bolt spell sent bolts of water above him, destroying the corrupter. The spectre armour's life stealing ability healed him within seconds.
Quickly he ran back to buy some purification powder from the dryad, and after he had he ran back to the place that had been corrupted. When he arrived there it had spread, but not enough to be out of control.
As he arrived at Ponyville, he bumped into the Cutie mark crusaders,"Hi."
"Are you the same guy who took down the entire changling army?"
"Yeah..."
"How did you do it?"
"Are you able to stop a force like discord?
"Why is your armour different?"
"Slow down, I did stop discord and its different because my normal armour is kind of broken."
"Can you do magic? Sweetie belle asked.
"Everto falx!" A glinting purple ring formed between Cortez's hands, and slowly sped it's spinning,"verus!" With that word the ring launched itself from his hands. Applebloom ducked although it would not have hit her anyways. It spun faster and faster until it hit the side of a cart. The Demon scythe shattered upon impact, and there was no effect upon the cart.
"Wow! What kind of magic was that, I don't think even Twilight can do that!" Sweetibelle exclaimed.
"Well I already know you can fly, so I'm not even going to ask that." Scootaloo said.
"What other magic can you do?" Sweetibelle asked, interested.
"Rutillus pluo!" A golden arch shot out of Cortez's hands, striking the ground creating golden sparks where it landed.
"You need to teach us how to do those things!"
All three of them yelled,"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS MAGES, YAY!"
"Nope!" Cortez sped away from them.
"Paperwork paperwork, is that all there is to being a princess?" The lunar princess lamented.
"No sister, although it may seem that way these days, there is more to it than that."
"Princess, something urgent has come up!"
"What is it?"
"'It' has returned!"
The crystal empire part 1
Cortez stepped into Twilights library, hoping to avoid the CMC's truckloads of questions. He saw that the other five elements of harmony were there too
"Where are my quills?! No, no no no no! I need the magical compendium volumes 1 through 36! Where is it?! Flash cards! I'm gonna make some flash cards! Spike, I'm going to need you to quiz me.
On everything! Everything I've ever learned. Ever."
Spike started to climb out from under the huge book that had nearly crushed him.
"That isn't gonna be enough cards." She ran to get more.
"Twilight, calm down! It's just a test." Spike looked up fearfully.
"Just a test? JUST A TEST?!? Princess Celestia wants to give me some kind of exam and you're trying to tell me to calm down because it's JUST A TEST?!" Cortez searched his bag for heart arrows.
"uah, yes." Before speaking spike grabbed a helmet and tied pillowed around himself.
I'd say she's handling things pretty well." Applejack turned to rarity.
"Yes." She replied.
"If this is well, I'll stay here while you go to Canterlot, I promised a few fillies that they could take me for show and tell." Cortez opened the door and left.
Cortez sped across the town to where he believed the school was. After going to the wrong place a few times, he finally arrived there,"Hey I'm here, what's up?"
"We have show and tell first thing, and as you already know." Scootaloo continued,"Your our show and tell."
"Ok, I can guess what the means but I'm not su—" He was interrupted by a loud bell singleing the start of the school day.
"Just wait outside here." The three filles walked inside.
Cortez waited for a minute. Then for five minutes. Ten minutes. After a half an hour the door sung open and Applebloom spoke,"Sorry about the wait, snips and snails took a long time showing off their ant farm."
"Filles and colts, may we present to you, our show and tell." Half expecting a trumpet blast, Cortez walked through the door unceremoniously.
"Uhh, hi." Was all he could think of to say,"I guess I'll just talk then. You may have noticed I'm not from around here, I'm from a world called terraria. I nearly killed Discord, fended off half the changling army, and saved Ponyville twice. I guess that's about it." He saw several hoofs fly up.
"My mom told me your a murderous alien maniac, is that true?" A colt at the back asked.
A bit surprised by the question, he answer,"I wouldn't call myself a maniac, but the alien part is true." He didn't explain how killing hostile monsters was different then murder.
"So what's your cutie mark, is it like, a changling with a knife through its head?" One or two other ponies laughed at the pink pony's question.
"What's a cutie mark?" He asked but then remembered,"Oh yeah, those marks that appear on you when you discover your destiny, well I guess the answer to that would be I don't have a mark on my butt." Snips and snails snickered loudly.
"Wait, so you're a blank flank? Hahahahahaha!" The pink fille laughed loudly.
"Well, if you mean to Insult me you failed, I still don't get it."
"Wow, he doesn't even know what a blank flank is, haha!"
"Any questions that don't involve failing miserably at trying to Insult me?" Their expressions changed as a few ponies around the room laughed,"Nope, well I'm done then."
"Those rotten fillies, trying to dishonour you in front of every pony, you saved Ponyville three times!" Sweetiebelle sulked. After school had ended, Cortez had agreed to walk home with them.
"Don't worry, I don't even get their Insult, so no harm done."
"But you don't understand, for years they've been calling us blank flanks for not having cutie marks, its kind of a big deal." Scootaloo kicked a rock across the street.
"Oh look, the maniac black flank is hanging out with his blank flank friends, go figure." Diamond tiara said mockingly while silver spoon chuckled behind her.
"Blank flanks blank flanks blank flanks!" They said as the pushed them further into the alleyway. Cortez watched and then noticed something. The dented dumpster from the first day he had arrived in equestria.
"Same allyway." Diamond and sliver were circling the three fillies laughing.
Cortez dealt with the situation in the only way he knew how. Two gunshots followed by streaks of green erupted from where Cortez stood. The two snobbish fillies were knocked over by the bullets that Impacted them.
"What did you do!" Applebloom yelled as she ran up to him.
"Sorry, you're right, I know I'm wearing spectre so I should have hit them with magic, it's just I'm so used to using my gun, that I just—"
"No, not that, you just shot two fillies!" Applebloom yelled.
"They looked like they wanted to hurt you, so I shot them." He said nonchalantly.
"But you can't just go around shooting ponies for no reason!" Sweetie belle looked up at him.
"They were trying to hurt you three, I think that's a reason."
"Can you heal them?" Applebloom asked.
"Does a wizard sell ice rods?" He walked up to them, broke open two healing potions and shoved the liquid down their throats,"They would be dead had I had shroomite armour, but with this spectre it just helps magic weapons." They drank the potions,"That's all I can do, could someone get local health services?"
Scootaloo had already left to find a doctor.
"You used one of your alien super weapon things on my daughter, I will not allow this to happen without consequences!" A older pony came up to Cortez and yelled at him.
"She'll be fine, healing potions always work."
"You shot her with some sort of magic thing, I am not okay with that!"
"It's not magic, and she did have hostile intentions towards my friends, so what did you expect." He asked.
"Mark my words you will pay for this, as owner of—"
"What, and you'll do what? You have money, I have unmatchable weaponry, who wins?" Cortez smirked.
"Well-I-but-" Having nothing else to say, he stormed off.
A guard flew down and landed next to Cortez,"Princess Celestia would like to see you right away!"
"What for, I mean, I know I just shot two fillies..."
"Shot two fillies!? No one t— well they never tell me anything, but it's about something else."
"Should I go to Canterlot then?"
"As fast as equinely possible! Except that your not a pony, so as fast as what ever you are can go."
After stopping to admire the landscape, Cortez arrived at Canterlot castle,"What's up?" He asked hoping it wasn't about the fact he might have killed to fillies.
"Twilight went for a test, do you remember?"
"Yes..." He answer uncertainly.
Celestia answered,"The situation may be more serious then I thought."
the crystal empire part 2
"So, do mean 'I go in and blow stuff up' or 'could be an actual problem'? From the look on the princesses face, he decided he should be concerned.
"Have you heard of the crystal empire?"
"No, but it seems like something I should have, I've spent a lot of time at the library."
"That's because there are no books about it, it was lost over a thousand years a—"
"Wait a minute I'm sensing a pattern. Almost all the villains that pop up are from a thousand years ago, Nightmare moon, Discord and now this crystal empire."
"The crystal empire is not the villain, it is who enslaved it that must be fought." The Princess looked back at him.
"So I'm guessing that was Twilight's test? Why am I needed here?"
"It was, but there is more you need to know."
"Doubt it, I know the drill, I go in, gun down the odd one out and we're done. But still, why don't you just make a list of all the ancient evils, so we can find them before the wreak havoc!"
Ignoring him, Celestia continued,"The emotions and feelings in the crystal empire are reflected across all of Equestria, if that love is not replenished at the festival—"
"Yeah yeah yeah, but what's the problem, why are you sending me in, who enslaved them!?"
"King sombre, a being with a heart as black as night, he enslaved the empire, and when Luna and I attempted to save the empire, he banished himself and the empire to below the ice of the arctic."
"Is that the more serious part?" Cortez was beginning to wonder if this was actually important or not,"I'm sure Twilight and her friends can handle that."
"But there is more, I recently discovered that King sombre is a creature call and umbra."
"Wait, isn't that the darkest part of the shadow— oh I get it."
Celestia continued,"He not only wishes to enslave the empire, but to release an army of those like him to ravage all of equestria!"
"Sounds like it's important, I just have to get something."
"There's no time for that, get there as soon as possible!"
"What progress have you made?" The queen demanded.
"While unable to rebuild this weapon, I have constructed several more using the same—"
"I don't care what it's made of, just that it works!" The changlings queen yelled, making the scientist stager back.
"They will give you a huge advantage over the ponies, but are not yet perfected."
"I don't care, Begen mass production!"
Cortez threw open the door to his house, he wanted his shroomite armour,"Hey drax, are the repairs finished?"
"Oh, sorry I completely forgot" he pointed to the staff,"I've been looking more at this, and I think that if we can push 20 000 Terathaums through it, it could open a portal and bring us back home!"
"Wait, how?"
"It had the thaumatic energy stored inside it when you discovered it, it only needed your mana to jump start it." The goblin said Excitedly.
"So we would just need a sort of thaumatic reactor?" Cortez asked uncertainly, having no idea what he was talking about.
"Exactly, if we can produce 20 000 Terathaums, it would be possible to power the device!" The goblin set the staff back down.
"But do you have the other thing ready?" Cortez thought it would be useful in this fight.
"Oh yes, although it's only a prototype, it is garenteed to flatten a small town!" The goblin smiled,"Don't kill yourself with it!"
"I'll try, thanks."
"Anytime"
After a much longer time than he expected, Cortez came to the place where the empire would be. Black smoke surrounded a transparent blue dome. Just as he deactivated his hover board, the shield began to shrink back,'Perfect timing.'
But then he noticed he black smoke advance upon the city, and just as he passed by it,'Guess they didn't mean to do that.' Using his lightning boots, he Landed on the balcony where cadence and shining armour stood, "There's something you need to know, there's an army of that thing, and we're sitting ontop of it! If this cloud gets through, we'll have a lot more to worry about than negative emotions. The princess called me in incase the army is unleashed!"
"Her magic won't last much longer, do you have any ideas?" The desperate captain asked.
"Yeah, I got one." Cortez answered,"It involves blasting that monster back to where he came from."
"I'll find the crystal heart, you fight King sombre." Twilight ran out of the room.
"Cadence, you just need to put up the shield for a little while longer, and I'll need some supplies." Cortez sped off in hopes of finding sufficient tools.
After a while of searching the castle, Cortez found what he needed. A long durable banner to be tied between two posts at the gates,'Just one more thing.'
"I need the fake crystal heart." Cortez descended to where applejack and rarity stood, trying to back ponies away.
"Even I can't keep this party going forever!" Pinkie pie protested,"Oh hey Cortez." The ball she had been bouncing on slipped, and flew up to where the crystal heart was perched.
"I'm going to need that." Cortez grabbed the rock, and flew up to the castle,"Just keep the shield up a little longer." He began to cut a hole inside the rock, and after doing so was able to place the device inside.
Cadence passed out and the magic barrier faced away,'Oh no' Cortez went faster than he beloved possible down to where he had tied the banner between two posts.
"My crystal slaves!" A face formed on the shadow as it advanced.
"Hey dumbass! You want this?" Cortez placed the rock inside the slingshot and pulled it back as the umbra's smile grew,"Then fetch!" He released the rock and immediately all the smoke retracted towards it.
"Ha, what a chump" Cortez gloated before detonating the bomb. A massive explosion erupted in the arctic, while all could hear the screams of the crystal monster,'Another job well done.' But again their was that small piece of him that said it was wrong.
"Another party, except this time there's thousands of ponies who want to shake my hand." Cortez mutters as another hundred or so crystal ponies came to thank him.
"I would like to officially..."
'Now the big one'
"...thank Cortez for defeating King sombre and freeing the crystal empire." The crowd cheered his name louder than he believed possible.
Queen Insectum watched as thousands of changelings mass produced the weapon called a 'Gun'.
"Hello queen, I would like to congratulate you on your a accession to the throne." A blue hooded figure materialized behind her.
"W-what are you!?" The queen demanded.
"Oh, that doesn't matter, what matters is I can help you in the goal we both share."
"I'm listening..."
"This is how you may destroy the Terrarian, and all of equestria. Instead of attacking him, make him come to you." A smile crept across his hooded face.
"I don't understand, how will he come to us?"
"Through fear, fear that the land he loves will be lost. Threaten him, and he will come running into your trap."
"Yes! Yes it will work!" The queen was almost jumping with excitement,"He will come here, and we will bring his head back, then rule forever!"
The blue figure vanished.
"It is done, the changelings are stupid, and think they will have a chance in battle with the Terrarian." The crowd below the tower he stood on cheered.
"Everything will go according to plan, and our lord will soon rise!"
