Chapters To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 1 - One hell of a welcome party
I was walking up through the tunnels, when I spotted something glowing slightly in the darkness, as I inched closer (Never know what the hell you’ll find in this forest, I’ve been exploring it for a good 500-ish years and I still don’t know everything in here) I shifted into bat form (Imagine someone just shrinking and changing, no magic fire or any other cheating things) and screeched at it, to see if it was alive…
I swear to god it just fucking teleported. Because now it’s on the god damned ceiling.
“Nope, Nope nope nope nope, just NOPE!” I shout, shifting into wolf form and getting right the fuck out of there…
Hey, I may be immortal (as far as I know), but if it glows in the fucking dark and can teleport without any flash or shit, I am not fucking with it.
So i guess I should explain some things, like just what my abilities are, and what I am. Currently I am a shapeshifter / god-like being, around about on par with Discord on average but, because I’m the Lord of Balance, if I use my element gem (a serendibite) I can block the elements of Harmony (and the Elements of Anarchy) or even reverse their effects… or I should be able to.
But that isn’t important at the moment, and besides, it would take me a couple of days to get in a position to even levitate something if I did that. Now I’m sure your wondering, ‘If your so god damned powerful, then why haven’t you taken over the world HUH?!’ to which I have a one-word answer. Paperwork. Do you even realise how much fucking paperwork that would make? If I ruled the world the I would have to sign every fucking thing, from royal allowances for the previous rulers (Hey, I’m not an asshole) to signing off shipments and (shudder) tax reports…
And besides, that would mean that the entire world would be dictated by one person, which would then lead to massive riots and rebellions, all the way from Neighjing to Mooscow… I still haven’t gotten over how much this world likes puns. I mean really? Canterlot, Las Pegasus, Haygus… and then theres where they put Tartarus…
IN MY OLD GOD DAMN COUNTRY! AUSTRALIA IS NOT THAT BAD! And they just keep on sending the god damned criminals there! It’s the British all over again. Well at least the can’t get sent there for stealing horses.
But I’m getting off topic, the point is, I am not going to take over the world… But I might take Australia back (I am never going to call it Tartarus, that belongs the the giant of a dude who stands on Nothing… in the mythology at least)
So anyway, I pissed off back home to grab a few things, things like Toothbrush and paste (that i absolutely did not steal from a passing blue caravanning pony who looked like a total bitch) some spare clothes, a brush for my hair, a cooking pot, that I chucked on my head as I chuckled to myself and said “Welp, I’m going to go put apple trees everywhere!” and finally, a bag of wild, mixed apples, I had a couple rainbow-coloured ones (I shit you not) that tasted like ambrosia from the legends, a couple big macs and a bunch of other types, I left the green ones out because no.
And so, with all my stuff in a neat orderly pile ( without the neat or orderly) and a pot on my head, i wondered aloud, “Where the fuck did I put my picnic blanket?”
After finding the blanket (I had it in the towels cupboard for some fucking reason) and tying it in a bundle (on a stick) with everything inside I shouted “JOSIE THIS IS FOR YOU!!” and then proceeded to put on the fakes Mexican accent i could and said “On a steek.” And so i set out westwards, to where I knew a little pony hamlet was(they obviously considered it important even though it only had around about 150 peo-ponies in it, i need to get my mannerisms up to date) I figured i would take regular breaks, one at the Tree of Harmony, one at the Everfree castle, and one at the Surreptitiously Superfluously Spectacular Stream Serpent Steven’s river.
so it was with much surprise i arrived at the Tree of Harmony a month later to discover a castle above it, decrepit and abandoned, but still obviously a castle, so I decided to investigate, wondering when this had been built. I mean, I had been away a thousand and fifty years, but still.
Now Imagine my surprise when I entered the main hall and noticed two thrones, with torn and decaying banners behind them, depicting the sun and moon, the very things Celestia and Luna claimed to control, if i remember correctly. Which means I’m either at a memorial, or they had to flee from something bad, well that thought put me on guard.
I took a look around the place, throwing stones every couple seconds and setting of numerous prank traps… “Yep this is their castle all right, No one else would have prank traps like this, and defiantly not this many!
I went to the top of the remaining tower, figuring that it would be safest to sleep in, as it was night… actually now that I think about it the sun should have risen by now. Oh well, just means more napping for me!
Or so i thought it did. That quickly went out the window when i heard yelling from downstairs. Quickly as I could i Packed up my makeshift bed and hid behind one of the remaining pillars. Until Luna herself teleported into the room! I hadn’t seen her in forever (almost literally) i wondered if she even remembered me, that thought sobered my mind up right quick.
So with a slightly clear mind I stepped out form behind the pillar, “Luna?” I asked her, quietly “What are you doing here?”
“O-Omnus?!” I could hear the surprise and shock at seeing me after so long.
“yep, that’s me, Please don’t hug strangle me.” I said smiling slightly
She lowered her arms “I was merely taking my place as ruler of Equestria. If the ponies deem to ignore my night then I will force it upon them! ” she said with fire in her heart and confidence in her voice.
“Why?” i asked, confused “They need to sleep during the night, and it’s not as if there aren't nocturnal ponies out there. Like the Thestrals or the Vamponies, hell maybe even some of the Frost Ponies. Besides if the night lasts for longer than it’s meant to the world will freeze, and all shall die Luna.”
She bristled with fury at that last part “ART THOUGH SAYING THAT OUR NIGHT KILLS ALL!?” She screamed.
“What! no! I’m saying that the sun has it’s part to play in the circle of life as well as the moon. I am sorry if it didn’t seem that way.” I panicked slightly.
“Very well, We are sorry as well for shouting at thou old friend.” she blushed, embarrassed (Can you say cute as all hell?) “Perhaps thou are right, and we should probably let Celestia out of the sun.”
I started laughing as she said that. then moved over to hug her.
But then, of course someone had to break the moment. “Nightmare Moon!” A little violet purple unicorn said (I am 6”2, Luna is around about 5”, the purple one is 3” Ahh Crotchy, now your at their level)
“We won’t let you get away with this!” she said as 5 other filed into the room behind her.
”Well act-“ i was interrupted
“The elements of harmony are right here! Honesty! Kindness! Laughter! Generosity! Loyalty! there all right here! And to bind them all together is Magic!” She shouted as the gems started glowing, reshaping themselves to better fit their new bearers.
“Oh dear” I said as i summon my Crown of Balance (The crown is what hold the gem in place)
They fired their elements at Luna, but I was having none of that and quickly branded myself in front of her, Summoning all of my magic reserves to create a shield in front of me.
Holy Fuck! These things are strong! God am I a lucky fucker that I summon my gem.
“Wha! But how!? The elements of harmony can’t be denied!” The purple one said
“I dunno Twi, but i know i can't do that again!” said the orange one wearing a… is that a stetson!? Where can i get one of those?!
“May, be, if, you, would, let, me, explain?” I panted, out of breath at the moment. “I literally just finished convincing her to stop this and free her sister. Nice timing by the way.”
“Yes, He did, and now I’m considering going back to the eternal night plan.” she stated flatly, I just glared at her “Wrong time for a joke then?”
“BUT HOW DID YOU BLOCK THE ELEMENTS OF HARMONY!?!?” The purple one shouted, having gotten redder and redder while we were talking.
“Trade secret, sorry hun.” I said, making her even more red. “Now then, you have a sister to free, and you six stay here, I should be good to go in a couple of minutes.”
“Okay Ommy!” Luna giggled as she lit up her horn. “Oh and omen?” I looked at her, “Tia will be glad to have you back with us.” She laughed(everyone thought I was fucking them way back when). I laughed with her.
Celestia appeared, sitting on a certain part of me, slightly confused.
“Hello Tia, if i knew you wanted that then i would have come back sooner” I said as she finally looked down.
She Fucking Squeed. That was adorable and beautiful… fucking Tia
“Omny!” she jumped off me, letting me sit up, before hugging me in that god damn bine breaking way. Family thing i guess.
“Well you’ve certainly gotten stronger!” i said as she let go, blushing slightly.
“HEY! You cant talk to the princess like that!” The one that looks like skittles shouted.
“oh? and why not?” I smirked
“Because she's the princess! She's the oldest, wisest person out there and deserves your respect you freak!” She shouted at me… I already fucking hate her.
I frowned “Newsflash Skittlefuck I am older than them. Also, I am most certainly wiser in some areas, like living off of nature, street smarts, and a bunch of other things princesses can’t do because it’s ‘Improper’. Oh and your calling me a fucking freak, My race was around long before yours was bitch.” With that last statement i turned into a hydra and spat acid to the side, letting her know my disgust (my clothes and bag disappearing, as usual).
She fucking punched me… in the face…
I glared at her, using the predator stare to promote the instinctive fear of a human to the number one priority. She pissed herself, getting that stare form seven hydra heads would be bad to be fair, but still.
“AHHAHAHAHAAH” I burst out into laughter, shifting back into human form, all the while she was frozen there. I just couldn’t stop laughing… until the orange one kicked me in the face. sending me flying through a pilar, a solid stone wall, and out into the air.
I formed wings and flew back in, doing a rolling landing and jumping up with claws instead of hands.
“You are going to regret that you fucking whore.” I said calmly
“Omnus Stop!” Celestia and Luna shouted at the same time. I jerked to a halt, obviously they are royal guard or something, just protecting their princess as their job entails. “just let them be Omny.”
“Ugh, fine” i say “oh and good hit by the way miss orange stetson pony.” with that said i transform into a pure black ragdoll kitten and curl up on top of Luna’s head, purring and faking sleep.
“So who is he Princess-es?Said Twi-Yknow, I’m just gonna call her Purple.
“Well that isn’t exactly our story to tell *Purple*, maybe you should ask him when he wakes up. At this point Luna was scratching my head, which felt disturbingly good.
“Oh, that remind me, I need to speak with both of you in private when we get the chance.” I said, startling everyone except for Tia and Luna, who remembered my antics well.
“Very well, we can talk once we get back to Canterlot.” Said Tia, petting me a bit… which sent me into an actual slumber.
To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 3 - God Damn You Guards
“That THING is a prince!?” I heard Prissy Cunt say, as I snapped out of memory lane (presumably it took a couple seconds) “I demand that his prince-hood be revoked! for un-princely behaviour!”
“… What un-princely behaviour, Blue Blood?” Asked Tia, looking exasperated.
“How on earth is he a prince” Whispered Luna into my ear.
“ House Blood was made into minor Princes and Princesses when you were sent away, for being the only ones to actually stand against you.” I gently whispered “It appear the line gone from being noble in name and behaviour, to noble merely in name.”
“Oh…” she said sadly.
“He has no respect for the throne Auntie! Look at him, he’s got Nightmare Moon on it with him!” said Prissy, obviously worked up.
“I designed this fucking throne for their father, I believe that I would be one of the only people to truly respects it’s history you cunt. Oh and you have already accepted my duel, so you cant demand anything about me.” I said, aggravated that he would say I do not appreciate history.
“Wel-uh-I-You will regret this day Freak, You will die one way, or another.” he threatened, then left, clenching his wittle fists like a baby with a toy.
“So how are you that pricks aunt Tia?” I said, rubbing a sobbing Luna’s back.
“Last of the line of Blood, royal orphanage.” Tia said, worrying about her sister, a fact of which I’m quite proud of.
When we finally got Luna to calm down and go to bed, her tower already furnished to her liking, apparently, though I did have to promise to make her night sky ‘glorious’. Which I did through putting all the constellation I remembered from my old world into it, leaving a big gap which had Luna’s cutie mark in it, along with her sister’s.
I went down to the kitchens to get a small nighttime snack when I heard whispering, ominous whispering. Naturally I followed it, I mean, I was in the royal castle, with a princess who had just come back, a princess who was a big player on the political scale and me, the princesses best ( I like to think ) friend.
I found two servants whispering outside Luna’s door, I snuck behind a pillar and quietly listened.
“You sure this is the room of the night bitch?” said servant #1
“Yea, I saw the Princess and the Freak take her here earlier.” Said servant #2
“Alright, I’ll go rid the world of evil, you stand guard.” #1
“Alright.” #2
I stepped out from behind the pillar and kept to the shadows, quietly sneaking up on them, sadly I didn't have my blades on me at the moment. As i reached them Number 2 spotted me.
“Hey who the hell are you!” He whisper-shouted as I stood up.
“Who me? I’m the Freak.” I said, punching him in the side of the head and knocking him out.
The other one drew a folding knife and said, “Now what are ya gonna do bitch? Huh?”… I wish i was kidding but he lunged at me… with a pocket knife… I dodged to the side and grabbed his arm, twisting and bringing my knee up under it, breaking it. He started screaming until i conked him on the back of the head, knocking him out.
The guards came running and Lu woke up. opening the door to see a discarded knife and me picking up two people in dark clothes. She paled, instantly realising what had happened after she looked at number ones arm (Which was bent about halfway to the hand, after the elbow) the guards, however, were less intelligent and as soon as they saw me the levelled their spears at me, shouting
“HALT CREATURE! You are under arrest!”
“For what exactly?”
“You are under arrest for attempted assassination of a prisoner. stand down and come quietly!”
“Now I know Celestia did not call Luna a prisoner.”
just as i said that Tia came running, All the guards bowed in a circle around me… it was awkward until one of them noticed I didn’t bow.
“Bow before the Princess beast!” he said, hitting the back of my knees with his spear shaft.
I may or may not have knocked him out and dropped the assassins after eating his spear as a dragon… oops
I noticed that Lu was still frozen, pale and hyperventilating. So i started walking towards her to calm her down… of course i had forgotten i had been told to halt… they may have poked me with those sticks of theirs… 9 knocked out guard and a shocked Celestia i was able to walked to Luna, beginning to rub her back and tell her calming things.
“And just why are there twelve knocked out ponies on the floor Omny?” she asked, sounding bored already.
“well, as you saw ten of them attacked first, i merely defended myself, the other two however, were planning on assassinating Luna, oh and I still need to show you both that thing i mentioned, so yeah hows your night been?”
“they, they were trying to WHAT!?!” she screamed as her hair seemed to turn into black fire, reminding me of an old friend that I lost track of, Swart Vuur.
“Ok Tia don’t calm down but do put your hair out. and use your inside voice.” i said calmly as, if you remember, I was their babysitter, I’ve dealt with her when she was angry before… She still has those big sibling instincts i see.
We eventually got Luna to calm down, of course she wouldn’t move from my side for some reason… I’m guessing it’s because she feels safe or something, i don’t know. Eventually the guard captain came and, surprise surprise he immediately thought it was me, the idiot (I was HUGGING THE FUCKING PRINCESS!).
“You are under arrest creature, for assault on royal servants and guards, as well as holding a princess hostage.”
“… You need to give the guards intelligence test Tia.” I said, getting frustrated.
Luckily another guard came along, a vampony, the captain of the night guard (who I accidentally forgot the name of.) and said, and I quote
“Why the buck are you arresting the prince, Shining?” He instantly paled, stuttering
“W-w-well he knocked out ten guards and two servants!”
“What happened to two sides to every story?” The Night Guard Captain (Whos name was Percussor Nocte i remember) said. I remember why I liked her so much, she could, I think, keep up with Dionysus himself in a drinking contest.
The day guard captain merely mumbled something under his breath… He’s probably lucky I didn’t hear that.
“Alright the what’s your story Creature?” he asked, gritting his teeth (A bit racist are we?)
“Well first off my name is Omnus. Secondly both princesses are hear and I'm not in chains… Evidence Done. HUZZAH!” I reasoned, then asked Percussor “When you get done with your shift wanna go to the bar? You know which one right?”
“That one got shut down, How about the one down south at the end of The Thing's street?” She said back (The Thing is the name of one of our friends, think pony Elephant Man, but immortal)
“Ok then, when do you get off?” I ask in return.
“About an hour, see you there at 3?”
“Sure thing Persy, see you then.” (It is currently around one AM… I’ve been standing here a while.
So I finally got Luna to go to bed in my room, because she wouldn’t go back to her’s. and turned around to a smiling Celestia… Oh god not this again.
“So, protecting Luna are we?” she asked (I wonder if she's going Trollestia or Molestia, She goes into them when she’s tired)
“Go to bed Tia.” Is all I say
“Would you like to come with me?” asks Molestia, rubbing my abs.
“No.” I deadpan, leaving a frowning Molestia to go to bed, then seeing Pers out of the corner of my eye.
I make it to the bar at just before 3, meeting a smirking Percussor
“So, getting in with both of them? eh Tiger?” she asks, punching me lightly in the arm as we head inside to get roaringly drunk and regret it in the morning.
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‘Ow-ow-ow what the fuck did I do last night?’ is the first thought that entered my mind when I awoke, the next is ‘Oh fuck I’m in my bed with Pers… well I’d better let her sleep so I don’t die as much…’
Of course she’s a vampony and awoke to, i imagine, my heart rate increasing. She yawned (What is with these ponies and adorable yawns?) and blinked a couple times, before freezing as she notices that she was laying on me.
“Well, this is a hell of a way to wake up isn’t it Om?” Oh thank god she’s not mad. “I am a bit hungry though so unless you don’t mind…” She said, stretching her face up to my neck.
“Not at all, I know how hard it is for you get food.” Was my answer
She bit down, it didn’t feel special or anything, just like two needles were put into my skin, it didn’t hurt but it was uncomfortable. I held still though.
“Your lucky I don’t mind, I imagine it’s harder to feed off of a struggling person.” I said, as she was still feeding.
She looked up for a second, pausing and saying, “Thrill of the hunt though.” and then went back to feeding.
She fed for another five minutes then stopped, licking her lips at the taste of my blood.
“Still my favourite taste i see.”
“I take care of myself, keeping prepared just for you.” I tease, bopping her on the nose. “So about how we woke up.” I say, noticing she was still naked, as was I.
“I-It um changes nothing?” She said, with a bit of hope in her voice.
“Alright then, it means nothing.” I said, as she sagged and sighed, from relief I assume.
Then I tried to get up,,. then realised that I had just been fed off of, my blood need time to recuperate.
"Give me five minutes will ya? My legs aren't good enough to walk on just yet." I asked. She merely smirked and started dressing, then left after she was done. "Bitch!" I laughed to myself
I got back to the palace at ten AM, having woken up at nine, to see not one, but two angry princesses, a boring-haired Purple and a pink alicorn… with a crystal heart cutie mark.
“And just where have you been Omnus Compositae?” asked Celestia (Uh oh full names are out, think fast!)
“I may have gotten drunk and woken up in a random alley.” I said (Nice!)
“And why do you smell like you had a one-night stand?” asked Luna (Fuck.)
“Well I assume we had a drunken gang-bang” I said (YOU FUCKING IDIOT)
They all frowned at that… of course Purple went,
“Oh so you do mate like us, I wonder what if your genitalia are the same?” Then she blushed after she realised what she implied.
The Pink one had left after I mentioned the words gang-bang.
And thats how I got laid, Got drunk, beat the shit out of Blue balls with a rapier, had a migraine for three days, and how I DIDN’T get the princesses to talk with Faust.
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To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 4 - Finally Faust, The Past, and Discord
Twas a Saturday morning, and all through the castle, not a creature was stirring, except for me, Omnus… And apparently a certain prismatically haired pony, who was squinting at me.
“I know your evil, and when I get proof, you better watch out because I WILL give it to the princesses, you may have them all fooled but not me! Nobody fools the Rainbow Dash!” she announced.
It was to damn early for this shit. so I smacked her away from me and went right back to sleep… or attempted to. She got up again and just fucking stood on me, Now, these ponies still weigh the same as a real pony, with pegasi being the weight of an overweight man instead, so thats about 120kg on my fucking back, If I was still human i would suffocate.
I managed to roll over and throw her off me, only for her to get on my stomach. Then, I had a devilish idea, I grabbed her and turned over, using her as a teddy bear and curling up around her.
“Hey! Lemme go!” she said, struggling, with no leverage luckily.
“Not until you stop being so damn fluffy.” I said, then fell back asleep.
Note to self: Stop accidentally pissing off the princesses.
“Ow, Fuck!” I yelled, in no pain, only surprise, as an aura I recognised as Celestia’s picked me up and dropped me on the floor.
“Why are you sleeping with the Element of Loyalty?” She asked, deceptively calm. Luna was blushing fiercely beside her, halfway between anger and interest.
… wait, Interest?!
“She woke me up, She was fluffy, She is teddy bear. Whats the time and do you have the day off? I said, wanting to get this done quickly.
“Fine, as long as it’s innocent” she said (Can’t promise that it will only ever be innocent) “and we can take the day off, why?”
“Your mother wants to speak with you.” I said, with a serious look on my face.
“If thou are kidding us we shall feed your genitalia to the pigs! ” Shouted luna, with hope in her voice.
“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” asked Tia
“You kinda blew me off for three days, you were way to busy and I couldn’t get you alone for the rest of the time.” I deadpanned (They teleported Rainbow somewhere, presumably to the palace torture chamber)
“Well that doesn’t matter now! Take us to her!” Tia said, now getting so excited that it showed up through her steel mask of disappointment and judgement.
“I can’t take you to her,” I said (They would try to break her free, and the seal would break) “but I can let you talk to her through this gem projector” I said, pulling it out.
I put it in the center of the room and teleported everything to the very corners as the princesses fidgeted in front of the door, I activated the gem with a simple voice command, “Jarvis, patch us through.” I said, then offered the princesses a blueberry.
“For the last bucking time you don’t have to say that, In swear to god Omn” Fausts voice came through as the projector flickered to life (Omn is pronounced Omen) The girls squeezed in delight as they saw her face (Now they’re a believer! without a trace, of doubt in their minds!)
“Bah, RDJ Forever!” I said, throwing my hands up in the air. “Anyway, I’ll just meditate for a while, have fun you crazy kids.”
“I’m older than you by almost a millennia.” Faust ‘the old ’ deadpanned.
I stuck my tongue out then sat there on my bed meditating about my old life.
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“Hey Big Bro, can we go to Comic Con in Melbourne?” Asked my little sister, Jane, with those fucking puppy eyes of hers, I’m going to have to get a gun to fend the boys off her when she’s older.
“Why? *Gasp* Does my little sister want to meet a cute boy at the convention! Does Wittle Janey-waney have a crush that’s going! Ohhh I bet it’s that little Billy isn't it? You have a crush on Billy don’t you Jane.” I teased, as any good brother/father does.
Our parents died in a car crash when I was 19, Jane was 4, I barely had enough money for me to live off of, so I starved myself a bit for her Y’know? I’m not about to give my little sister to a fucking orphanage when I can just suffer a little for her to be happy.
“What, No, Billy is just a friend!” She protested, blushing (Ouch and I hope I didn’t get it right… Billy is fucking weird, he’s ten and I caught him talking to his Pokemon cards…) “So can we go?” And theres the little kid attention span (She’s currently 10 as well)
“Hmmm, Sure. But do you want to dress up?” I asked, we have enough money to go, at least for a day, and I can probably use one of my sick days for it. (I work at the local La Trobe as an accountant)
“OOH CAN I?” She screamed excitedly (That is what I live for) “I wanna go as Korra from Legend of Korra! CAN I, CAN I?!?!”
“Sure!” I said, smiling and ruffling her hair a bit.
So we got to Comic Con, me dressed in a plain grey T-shirt and grey cargo shorts, and my little avatar companion, Jane.
We wandered around the convention all day, me, just being there for Jane, not looking at anything really, (And getting compliments on how good of a parent I was from random strangers i had never met.) and Jane dashing about looking at everything.
We were about to leave when I spotted a stall I wanted to go to, calling Jane over and saying
“Hey Jane, you can get one thing from this stall, then we’re going.”
“Ok Big Bro!” She said, content with that apparently.
She looked at all the item’s there (Holy shit he has a Tasty Planet Goo Plushy! Anyone else remember that old flash game?) and finally decided on two blue Arm Braces from Legend Of Korra.
When I bought them for her however, something happened, she started to writhe in pain and I quickly dropped onto my knees to try and hold her still, when she disappeared with a flash.
“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER! ” I screamed at the man, holding him up by his collar, not even noticing how no one else reacted to me screaming.
“This.” Was all he said before Shoving the Goo plushy into me somehow and kicked me in the balls.
I started crying, he just Poofed my sister out of existence and I couldn't do shit! I slowly started to get up, murder in my eyes, when, about halfway through standing, the world flashed.
That was the last thing I saw before consuming an entire biome (Now known as the Badlands) and screaming my rage to the heavens, before just kneeling down and crying for an undefined amount of time.
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I still haven’t found her, I have however found out about the Multiverse, through experimenting with consuming different things, I consumed a hole in the world and threw a message through (To any who find this doll, [It was my little sister’s Korra doll] If you are on the side against life, know this, if you summon me I WILL kill you, However if you side with life, summon me and have a nice chat or an exchange of favours, Oh and if you see a little girl cosplayer by the name of Jane dressed as Korra from Legend Of Korra, Summon me, I want to see my sister again.).
I sat there, just thinking about her and not even realising that I was crying until Faust said something.
“Omn, are you OK?” was what she said, snapping me back into reality.
“Hmm, Yea, yea I’m fine.” I said, She knew not to push when I didn’t want to discuss something… But the sisters didn’t
“Thou art crying Omny, That does not agree with thy words.” Said Luna.
“I agree, you are most defiantly no ‘O.K’” said Tia, crossing her arms.
“Just leave it, the past is the past. Do not press me about this.” I said, as sharply as I could while not insulting them, then leaving to go walk in the gardens, maybe talk to Discord (I heard he’s in the center of the gardens as a Pigeon Potty)
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POV Change, Luna
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“I learned long ago to not push things about him girls. His past is his own, and is filled with regrets I suppose, but that is not my problem, he wants us to stay out of it. So we will” Said Mother, semi-sternly.
“But Mother! He is our friend, we must help him if we can!” I said, surprised.
“I for one, agree with Lulu, we should help Omnus with his problems if he has them.” Said Tia (Huzzah! Sister agrees with me!)
“That is not what friendship is, forcing him to fix his problems is slavery of the mind, if he needed help he would ask it. Omnus is a smart stallion, he wouldn’t let it effect anything.” Said Mother, for some reason not wanting to help him. “If he came to me for help I would give him anything I could,.But he has made it clear in the past, And just now, that he does not want help.”
“I hath been down that path is the past, that is how we had Nightmare Moon.” I said, disagreeing.
“Nightmare Moon was born of jealousy, not grief.” Was Mother’s short, cryptic answer “Now then, you girls have a country to rule. If I here of you harassing Omnus about this then you WILL get grounded Missies.” Was the last thing Mother said.
“What do you think she meant by grief?” Asked Tia, pondering that.
“I know not, but it is most pressing no?” I said in return, curious myself.
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POV Change, Omnus
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I sat there, just talking to Discord’s statue with him talking back via Telepathic Communication. We talked about a lot, apparently Tia and ‘Lulu’ don’t visit him, ever. It was therapeutic in a way, talking with an old friend who had gone mad through pretty much going through the same things I did. He did most of the talking, I just sat there and listened with my eyes closed, absorbing in everything, until he said the one phrase I was dreading at the moment,
“Tia and Lulu are coming, You might want to hide behind me as a stick or something eh? Maybe a little butterfly on my nose?”
Naturally I did turn into a butterfly and sat at his nose, but my wings had a little ‘Birdie’ markings on them, lend hand right wing, right hand left wing.
Discord laughed at that, then said, “Just let me taunt them, they’ll go away soon enough.”
“Your show dude.” Was all I said. If Discord could have grinned he would have.
“Why hello there Ladies! For what reason have you come to see little old me? Could it be because of a lack of discord, don’t pardon the pun, among ponies? Want me to spice it up a little for you?” He said.
“We are not here for your games. Guard, are you sure that he went this way?” Said Tia, seeming impatient.
“Y-y-yes your majesty, he was sitting here for twenty minutes before you summoned me, perhaps another guard saw him leave?” said Captain Redshirt
“Thank you Lieutenant Redshirt, you are dismissed. (So close! Wait… what?)
“Awww, not here to see me Tia? How about you Lulu? And what is this, a prisoner escape Your bedro- mean The Royal Fungeons Celestia?” (Fuck, Discords good. But I had a better one.)
“We are here with Celestia Beast. It would do thou well to remember that WE are in charge here, not thou.” Said Luna, angrily
“Wha-no!”said Tia, blushing. “I am here to find Omnus, You know, the one that was able to hold you down so we could imprison you.” said Tia, Ouch.
{I had to mate, you were going to destroy the balance… though Tia has also ruined Balance…} I thought to Discord,
[Don’t worry about it, besides, I needed time to cool off… But even then a thousand years is a bit much] thought Discord back to me
{How about this then, In about six months I’ll send a class expedition up here to the gardens, three fillies will start an argument and Bing Bang Boom, your free. But Tia will never buy that you just went sane from that, so you get stoned after pressuring the Elements of Harmony’s Bullshit Friendship thing. and then I convince Tia to let them ‘Reform’ you. You go rogue again, and then you do a friendship spiel after becoming friends with one of them.} I quickly thought up a plan, not a good one, mind you, but a plan is a plan.
[Hmmm, let me think about it, I’ll tell you next time you come around ok?] He thought to me, seriously considering this.
{Ok, I’ll comeback in around two days, you can either do this, and earn their trust, or have me free you then, and run off into the Everfree, theres a perfectly cliche evil looking ruined castle in there for you.} I thought
[It’s a deal] he said back to me.
“Well, if the Obviously Ominous Omnus was here I would have noticed, after all, I have some choice words for that man!” Said Discord to Tia and Lulu, feigning anger (I hope)
“Pray tell, How dost thy jaw feel, being stuck like that.” said Luna, smugly (I did not raise her like that!)
“Probably the same way it feels to have Nightmare Moon in the background of your mind, annoying.” Said Dissy (He just earned a nickname) with a sick cold burn… Get it, cause the moon is co- ok i’ll stop.
Tia and Luna stormed off and I went back down and changed into human form.
“Thanks man, I owe you one.” was all I said.
“No you don’t, you are, after all, going to free me, that was my way of paying you back. Friend.” Was what he said. I sat there for the remainder of the day, then went to bed, promising to visit in two days, then once a week, at least. if he chose option one.
But I guess we’ll just have to wait and see what he chooses wont we?
To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 5 - I Make A Vow.
I walked down the large, spacious, wasteful, sparkling clean hallway towards my room, they put me about midway between their towers… God i’m going ti have to break it to them that I like them only as friends, Sure, They are both beautiful, but theres also the fact that I practically raised them.
I noticed the sun was setting, (Luna can design shapes into the moon but she can’t move it, Celestia CAN’T move the sun, neither can move the planet) when I spotted a pair of guards, the one on the left, a girl, took her helmet off and smiled at the other one, who had already had his off.
The girl was Perc, much to my surprise, and the boy I had never met, He had blue hair and his armour had purple star insignias on it…
I remember now! Shining Armou- wait, isn’t he fucking the babysitter princess. Ah well, either way I’ll let the kids have their fun (Hopefully not to much).
So it seems I ‘forgot’ to mention just how my abilities work. You see, much like in the game, Tasty Planet, when I eat something my skin turns into that colour. I can eat anything, emotions, (Yes emotions are physical, Magic Emotions or something) Meat, Veg, Fruit, Gems, and literally anything, even dragon scales!
So as you can imagine I never quite go hungry anymore, I still like the taste of meat, which is why I hunt, but I don’t specifically need it. I also may or may not have eaten a Draconequus corpse, and so, can do a little summoning magic, I don't really use it that often (So it is weak compared to Discord, maybe a normal unicorn level), because Cheaters use magic, Awesome people Eat Everything that makes them mad.
I asked a passing guard (on duty) what the time was, he said that it was getting near 6pm so I started heading to the royal dining hall.
I arrived not five minutes later and entered, noticing that the Elements of Harmony… I’m going to call them the Mane 6 from now on, and Spike, were sitting there already eating. I sat down at the far end of the table, (The princesses are petty, no matter what they say, and will probably ask worse questions if i sat up there instead of down here) The table only had enough room for about fourteen people, with the princesses sitting next to each other at the head.
A waiter came and took my order, I asked for a salad with gems in it (I would have ordered meat if it was just me and the Princesses).
“So where were you today Omnus?” was the question Tia asked, after waving for the guards to leave the room… uh oh.
“I was just out wandering the city, It’s amazing what a hood and galoshes can do for a persons figure, Ya know?” I said, not exactly lying but still hiding the truth.
“Now thats a gosh-darn lie!” said Applejack adamantly calling me out
“So what were you doing then Omnus?” asked Tia, with a confident smile on her face.
“What I do is my business and mine alone. I will say this once and once only Princesses. Drop It.” I said bluntly, narrowing my eyes at them
“We do not know what thou art talking about Omnus, We art merely concerned for thou’s safety and wondered how thy day was.” Said Lu, slightly haughtily.
“If you will excuse me, I think I’ll go create another Badlands, Perhaps we can call this one The Wastelands.” I said, standing up form my half finished meal, and tossing the gems to Spike. Who was minding his business.
So I went stress hunting, It was fun, the hydra was a challenge compared to the normal stuff in the forest.
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POV Change, Celestia
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I watched him walk out, angry, and winced. It’s very rare that Omnus even gets angry, rarer than even I, and yet we made him mad in mere minutes. Perhaps mother was right, but that is an apology better suited for later, when he is calm… maybe I could finally get him alone.
“Excuse me for saying this Princess, but, What was that!? It’s like you were interrogating him!” I hear Twilight say, confused.
“We had an incident regarding him this morning, He was meditating about his past life and started crying. He cries less often than a prisoner form Tartarus escapes.” I say, calmly.
“Well princess, If you’ll here my opinion, Maybe he was thinking ‘bout family, can’t exactly blame him for keeping that from ya.” Reasoned Applejack.
“Nah! I bet he was crying over something like not getting a sandwich before the shop ran out or something, maybe about an evil plan that failed.” Said Rainbow Dash (Just why does she hate Him so much?)
“Why do you hate him so much? I mean, if thats ok to ask…” said Flutter Shy.
“Because He’s evil, he doesn’t have a good bone in his body!” Said Dash, stubbornly.
“He practically raised me and Luna.” I said, “He was pretty much our father.” She paled at that, realising she insulted someone who was a parent to us (and hopefully, future consort).
“Well I think he’s one of this villains that act all nice, then stab you in the back when you least expect it, or maybe he already has and you don’t know it!” said Rainbow… I think she's been reading to many of those Daring Do novels I had personally published.
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POV Change, Unknown
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There was that merchant, pain, then nothing, I-I’m only ten for gods sake! Why me… What happened to Mark? Will he help me. I hope so. I’m so scared Mark, please, help me.
I was surrounded by weird horse-people hybrids, they, they were all pointing those spears at me and i, I panicked. Mark, I hurt them, I hurt people. Mark, whats wrong with me.
I sat there crying in my cell is what was called ‘The Royal Dungeon’ And those weird horse people came. they, they were asking what I was, as if I was the weird one, Mark, help me, please Mark. I miss you… Big brother.
The big, mean dark one came in again today, still asking the same question, Who art thou?, Art thou of relation to Omnus Compositae. I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS! i want to scream, but i can’t, they’ll just hurt me again. Big brother please, help.
The white one came in today, she’s a lot nicer than the blue one. She always brings me food and asks the same questions, but today was different. She said some words that scared me.
“My friend, Omnus, He was crying today, he said it was about the past and I can’t help but feel as though he had a little sister. Considering he’s human though. It’s unlikely.” Could Omnus Compositae be my brother? Could my brother have left me to rot in the dungeon?
Nah, he wouldn’t do that, theres no way. Right?
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POV Change, Omnus / Mark
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I was walking around, just wandering, trying to clear my head late at night. I eventually found myself drawn to the dungeons. I walked down the steps and grabbed a torch, just walking in any direction my body chose, while my mind wandered it’s own path.
That is, until I saw her. A human. Dressed as Korra from Legend Of Korra. I sat there for who knows how long. Just watching my sister, Jane, sleep. I made a vow then.
“I will get you out Sis. No matter what I have to do. No matter who I have to break. I will get you out. Then you will be free. We can be a family again. Even if we are being hunted by ponies. They can’t stop me anyway. So I WILL keep you safe. I will not lose you again.” I vowed silently
“Never Again.”
I woke up the next morning. Plotting how to get her out. I eventually decided to just barge in and take her, consequences be damned. If anyone got in my way… Well I can eat anything…No remains. I will not fail her again. Never.
I started crying. Why was she even in the dungeon? She would never hurt anyone, She's only 10 for fucks sake! (I used magic to check her age) If this is how Luna and Tia treat people… I can’t exactly trust them anymore can I?
Maybe Discord was right. Maybe the ponies have ruled to long. Pride comes before a fall. The only variables are who trips them, and if they get stabbed while they’re down.
I was just sitting there, trying, unsuccessfully, to stop crying. Eventually, whoop-dee-fuckin-doo the queen bitch of the gay pride parade waltzed on in…
“It’s not a good day to test me Girlie.” I say, gruffly. “I’m warning you now, don’t fucking do anything, don’t fucking threaten me, Don’t even fucking talk to me or I Will, End You.” I said. matter-of-factly
She fucked off right quick after that. I sighed, rubbing my face with my hands. On one hand, she’ll now be to scared to annoy me. On the other, She will defiantly tell the others about this and I’ll have to deal with the fallout.
Oh well. If Tia asks I’ll just say I’m still mad over last night. The truth… kind of.
I was right. Tia and Lu barged in, in the middle of me getting dressed. They blushed and then went.
“Did you threaten Rainbow Dash.” Said Tia, not really asking
“Yes, I did.” Was all I said, then I walked past them and started heading off the the top of the mounting. They followed me, of course
“Why dis thou threaten her?” Said Luna.
“She had been threatening me for the past couple days, i felt it prudent she knows what will happen if she continues.” With that said I grew wings and took off. flying to the top now…
Oh right they have wings as well.
“You -“ Tia started
“Drop it.” was all I said before teleporting to the gardens and then going to the center of the maze to just lay down and relax for a while.
Before long it was dinner time again. This time things went a little differently, with Applejack and Rarity blatantly glaring at me, Tia tired of me, Twilight confused, Spike Indifferent, Rainbow not even looking in my direction, and Pinkamina muttering something about throwing me an ‘adult party’, whatever that is… wait… Adult party as in, Strippers? If i’m right Pinkie will definitely be able to throw me a party. Fuck. Yes. Flutters was either studying me with her eyes, or undressing me with them.
Before long it was over, and I showered, then went to bed, I would get Discord’s answer, then I would free her. At any cost.
To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 6 - Fuck Equestria
Dream sequence
I'm running through forest, a Monster chasing me. Somehow i'm staying ahead as it crushes the trees behind me, trying to get to me. But I can't here the trees splintering, all I hear is a blub, like when you drop a pebble in water. However, I can here screams, cut off short, terrified cries of "Mommy! ", "Daddy No! " and the worst of all. "Why Mark , why would you hurt them like this, wha-what have they done Marky? " Then. Finally, the one that breaks me, causing me to just stop running. To stand still and just accept it, numbness spreading through my entire body as tears stream down my face.
"Mark! Please, no, no Marky Don-AHHHHH-! "
As I sit there, the Monster crawls up behind me, I turn around.
"Why? Why do you torment me?" I ask.
"Torment you? Me?" It asks, sounding Incredulous. "Why Mark, It's you who's doing this. Don't you remember? I am you. And Mark. I will win eventually, when that happens All Will Be CLEANSED!
Waking World, Mark/Omnus
I jolt upwards, accidentally head-butting the creepy pink one. Pinkie Pie.
"Owie Wowie I don't like this game. To much pain, I mean, a little pain is nice, but only when I'm nice and strapped up!" She exclaims... Hmmm, might have to remember that...
"Maybe for you, but I prefer giving it out, just a little fun, a little nibble here, a pinch there. a nice strap somewhere else. Perfect." I purr, flirtatiously.
"Well then," She said, smirking, "I may just have to prep a little 'surgery kit'" She waggled her eyebrows.
"All that aside." I said, getting back to business. "Why were you watching me sleep?"
"Oh that? I just came in and wanted to see if you sleep like us!" She said, joyfu-... you know what? She says everything joyfully. "The princesses sent me to tell you that breakfast was ready! And Twilight, Rainbow and Applejack are all listening at the door!" Right as she said that the three of them stumbling in... To Pinkie Straddling me and only my bare chest visible... uh oh.
Rainbow turned red... Shouldn't that be purple with the fur? "Hey Freak! Get outta Pinkie!" She charged us... While we were laying down... with the blanket between us... Did she think I had a fucking hole in the blanket?
She jumped on the bed as Applejack was saying "Now hold on now Rainbow!"
"You want some to Skittles? I can take of two at once. Even four if you two are up to it." I said, suggestively.
"Ye- wait no! Shut up!" Said Rainbitch, punching my chest. Repeatedly. Luckily I'm now solidified goo so i just jiggled, a bit like jelly.
"Rainbow get offa him." said Applejack.. I like her. "You too Pinkie." She said after a moment. Damn.
"What were you two doing anyway?" Asks *Purple*
"Oh we were just seducing each other until the precious little Alchohol, Vampire-book and M&M came in." I say, calmly. Sending Pinkie into a giggle-fit, still on top of me... Shaking... on my crotch.
"Oooh, Someones getting antsy is he?" She giggles, cutely, while shaking her ass a bit. I merely groan a bit.
As the other three left, each varying degrees of red (HAH TWILIGHT IS A VIRGIN... maybe some breaking in later... oh well.) Pinkie and I had a little 'Party' of our own. Just regular, she and I quote, "Forgot my equipment, sorry, maybe next time!"
About half an our later we came to the dining hall, hair wet from our showers (What, you think I'm doing a walk of shame in what amounts to a six star hotel?) Surprisingly enough they were all waiting at the table. The Mane six (Minus Pinkie) all had red faces and the princesses were squinting at me, as always Spike didn't care. What a Bro.
"And what were you two doing?" Asks Celestia, pointedly
"You wanna take this or shall I?" asks Pinkie
"Ladies first, I say, bowing and sweeping my arms towards the table.
"Thank you. Well you see Princess, when a mare and a stallion decide that they wanna make extra special cake-frosting, They have a little Party of Two, Sometime, like now, It's Really good! Sometime it isn't though." she exclaimed... yeah that made me puff my chest out in pride I admit. "And then, if the mares in he-"
"Thank you Pinkie, I believe we get the picture." Tia said, raising a hand and blushing madly. So was Lu. "Please, just sit down. We Will discuss this later Omnus." In the 'No-Arguement' voice... But I couldn't resist.
"But TIIAAAAA!" I cheeked.
We sat down and the waiters came along to collect our orders. I don't know what the other got but I got a bowl of assorted gems.
The food arrived and I started crunching down. (I crave those minerals.) Chewing only to be polite. I didn't even have to use my mouth to chew really, it's just a force of habit. Apparently Spike was curious of some things.
"So what kind of party did Pinkie mean?" He asked, causing me to choke somehow, and Pinkie to take a drought of juice to do a spit take at me with masterful precision. I extended my mouth outwards and caught all of it, naturally.
"How old are you, Spike?" I ask.
"I'm eighteen, why?" he says, causing me to actually loose form for a second, turning into goo and devouring the chair and some tiles.
"Ei-Eighteen. and you don't know what the birds and the bees are? and you're so small?" I say. when I reform. summoning extra tiles and another chair. "Have you been eating your meats?"
"Wha-ew! No, why? I don't have to!" He says, disgusted. I... I just don't even...
"What!?!" I yell "You Are Dragon. Sharp Teeth. Sharp Claws. Predator Look. Brain Says No."
"Wait, so, I'm meant to eat meat?" he asks.
"You will actually die form not eating meat. Have you even had fish? Omega 3 Tablets, Iron tablets, Have you kept you teeth sharp? what about soy beans? at least tell me you ate them, Hell, even pistachios!?" I'm standing up now, Angered.
"Spike doesn't need any of those. He has the gemstones to supplement them." Says Fucking Purple... FuckING.
"Do you even realise what you just said?! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO FIND LIVING CELLS IN A GEMSTONE YOU STUPID GODDAMN ARHGHHG! " I just crash. Covering my face and hanging my head. "Just, just fucking scan him, scan his living to dead cell ratio. Spike is a carnivore. Not. A. Herbivore. Goddammit woman have you even asked any other dragons what they eat. I know for a fact that the castle has a book on them, detailing diets."
Spike is pale, just sitting there staring off into nowhere. God. He's eighteen and doesn't have wings. Dragons normally get those at 6! He's got the body of a toddler!
Most of the others are shocked as well, except for Tia, who looks shamed. and Lu, who merely has her eyes widened.
Purple just sits there. Looking. Fucking. Angry. FUCKING! ANGRY!
"And Just Who Are You To Tell me what Spike Needs!?" She demands.
I start shifting into a golden dragon. the size of a fifteen-year old
(size)
"Considering I lived among them for at least fifty years. A lot. I know a shitload of there customs. And No. I will not be telling you them, they are reserved for members of the Dragon Hoard." I said, angrily. then went to the gardens.
As I was walking in the gardens I remembered about Disso andstarted heading towards his statue. Lo and behold, when I got there someone was stoned (and I don't mean Discord).
A pony was there, she looked like a tree-hugging type. So I started a conversation, to both of them.
"Hello, how are ya?" I ask.
"Good, man, I'm just, shifting through the colours of the auras. Seeing the different ones this statue has man." She says, sounding drugged "My names Tree Hugger by the way man."
Hey wait. how does she know what a man is?"
[I do not know and it disturbs me] says discord,
{Well... Do you have an answer? To the question I asked last time?} I say back.
"Hey man, why are you like, talking to the statue man?" She asks... Oh god she's an aura sensor. I thought she was just high.
"I don't know what you're talking about." I deadpan, glaring at her. Luckily she takes the hint and back off
"Okay man, just be careful y'know, Discord is not connected to the earth. only the spirit realm, and he creates only Illusions." With that said she... turns into a sapling? What the fuck? is that how she tele- k'now what? fuck it.
[Who the, She. What?] Says Discord, confused.
{My answer?} I ask, subtly telling him not to question weird ponies.
[I'll take the 6 month option, another six ain't going to do anything after all.] He says... using logic.
{Alright then. Hey, don't get stoned again, I'm not sure what'll happen if it hits someone twice, It could scramble your brains into being less chaotic over time, thereby making the world screwy and making me have to become a mass-murderer or something.} I warn, jokingly.
[Don't worry, I always have a backup plan... as long as you aren't involved] He jokes. I fucking love this guy.
{See you when I see you mate. and, as always, I'm sorry.} I say.
[We've been over this, it was not your fucking fault. You have nothing to be sorry for.] He gently says. telling me to shut the fuck up and get over it.
That night, Omnus
I walk, as if with purpose, across the courtyard and towards the dungeon, shifting my form into dark green goo as I go, and slithering up the grassy hill that's right in front of the royal dungeons.
As I enter the dungeons I feel that I tripped a magic alarm.
"Oh Shit." I say, as i started sprinting towards the cel of my sister. keeping as quite as I could while going that fast.
I skid to a halt in front of her cell.
"Hey sis, Wake up, wake up now!" I say, as I rush to melt the bars off the cell. Now in human form.
"Huh, wha? BIG BROTHER!" She exclaims, joyously, "How did you get here. Those big meanies wouldn't let you in, I know for a fact that the blue one would have just sent another hallucination to torment me, instead of one of yo-" She pauses her ranting as that bars melt.
I rush into the cell, Grabbing her and quickly turning around and sprinting, as I reach the exit to the dungeon I see both Celestia and Luna standing there. They look suprised.
Qucikly I turnaround, beginning to spring the other way, there should be a sewer entrance somewhere. Not even hearing their calls of
"Wait, Omnus!"
There it is. Right at the back of the Dungeon. I shift the arm that isn't holding Jane into a crowbar, jamming it into the side of the manhole and jimmying it up, right as we duck down I hear the words, the words that will haunt me for a Very. Long. Time.
"Wait Omnus! Thats an enemy to the state, she must be Tortured For Information " Luna yells.
It's at that moment when I decide, Fuck Equestria. Fuck the sisters. Fuck the elements of harmony. Fuck Chrysalis and Sombra.
Fuck it all.
View Online
To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 7 - Bonding time! and discussing punishments.
At Omnus' Everfree home. Jane's POV
I woke up, gradually blinking the blurriness away, seeing a wooden Pira pyramid roof, with (I think their called struts? yea,) struts, evenly spaced across it. wondering where I was I sat up and regretted it straight away.
"ah! My head!" I quietly said. Unfortunately someone must have heard it. I hope it isn't Blue Meanie. The White One would still be bad, but not as bad, she was always polite.
"Jane? You ok?" Said... Mark!
"Mark!" I yelled rushing over to him and hugging him.
Same Place, Same Time, Omnus POV
She was hugging me! Oh thank god, Ra, Chaos, The Void, Jahova, Hell even Ymir!
"Hey there little sis. How ya feeling?" I asked, gently prying her off me and kneeling down (She's around 3", Short, I know. But still adorable).
"*Giggle* Good now Big Brother!" She said, It's been so long I forgot her damn giggle. I'm glad I was able to create a picture of her from my memory when I got here or I might have forgotten what she looked like!
"Umm. Big brother, are, are we going to go back to the mean blue one and the white one?" She asked... The Mean Blue one?... Oh dear me Luna Nightmare Moon, What exactly have you done? ... I may have to check her memories. I'm not going to ask my sister to tell me what was done to her.
"No, we aren't going back there. Ever if I can help it.' I said, smiling gently at her.
"Yay! Thank you big brother!" she exclaimed excitedly
"Hey sis? If you ever wanna talk about what happened. you can just talk to me ok? No matter what I'm doing." I say, looking her in the eye for a moment, then hugging her.
"Now then. let's talk about what you can do eh?" I say joyfully "I wanna see if you can Bend It Like Beckham!" I chuckle at my pun.
"Umm, ok? how did they do it in the show? Smooth movements?" She asks, a little confused.
"Here." I say, Shifting forms and becoming Aang from the original series. "Let me teach you!" I assume it's just moving your bodies natural magic to do things with movements.
News flash! I'm awesome. and right.
"Look Daddy! Im doing it!" She yells, bending some water out of a glass and freezing it in place... I'm going to assume that her costume lets her master it easier or something... Wait what did she call me?
"Wow! Seems to come naturally to you Sis! Now practice it. Again and again and again and aga- "I get it!" She interrupted my little rant... She's growing up! Almost brings a tear to my eye and a shotgun to my hand... I'll go make a rocking chair for the porch.
Hey if she's the avatar would enemies from the series 'spawn' now that she's here?... OH FUCK MURPHY!
Hey nothing happened!
Late that night, Omnus POV
I put her to bed, I guess I'll have to make her one soon. and laid down on the floor, next to the bed of course. I waited half an hour until I was sure she was asleep (She does little high pitched snores, like in cartoons) and I stood up and went over to the side of the bed she was sleeping on, placing both my hands on her head I poured a little magic into them, with the intent to view the memories.
Memory lane, Jane's Pov
Hungry, thats what I am. I need food. I- I might die if I don't, I don't want to die. I want to go back to my friends. Billy, Alisha, Cedric, Diane. I want to go home.
The Blue one is coming through the door now, With food... I hope I get some this time.
"We art going to talk about just how thou ended up in my chambers. Or art we going to just go with thou old answer. 'I don't know, I was just with my brother in MelBorne. You could have at least come up with a city that actually exists." She says. Starting to pick at the food. Watching me all the while.
"I-I told you I don't know how I got there ! I was just wandering around Melbourne Comic Con with my brother, Mark, and he buyed something for me and poof! I'm there. Can I have some of that food?" I say quickly, hungry.
"No." was all she said.
It went on like that for a couple more days.. I assume since It's always dark down here except for torches. Sometime she would throw the food at me, watching and laughing as i tried to reach it but failed.
Then a white one came in. She has pretty rainbow hair.
She had food as well.
"Hello little one." she said, smiling. She seems nice.. but she has food and...
"Would you like something to eat?" she says gently.
"Yes!" I say. happy. food.
"So do you truly not know how you got here?" she asks
I pause long enough to swallow and say "No, I told the Blue one over and over, I. do. not. know." I said that last part with frustration.
"Very well." she says.
"Would you like some more food?"
The next day the blue one was banging on my cell door.
"If thou dost not tell us how thy got here we shall have to get it... Another way." She says, glaring at me.
"I don't know how!" I scream at her "Just leave me alone!'
"Very well then. On the morrow we shalt get the information from you... forcefully.
Omnus' Shack, Everfree forest, Omnus' POV
"That fucking." I growl quietly. Luna can't enter her dreams anymore, I put up too many wards to ever be broken, wards of regeneration, kind dreams, Ward regeneration wards, and defence wards.
"God, at least Tia was nice, It seems that Luna has forgotten what the fuck a child is though!' i say, clenching my fists at my knees.
I sigh, unclenching my fists. I figure I'll tell Jane that I had a peek, a little white lie seeing as I saw it all. unconscious in Luna's room. Dungeon. Starvation! calm, calm down Mark.
I'll ask her what Luna's punishment should be tomorrow. She was never a very vengeful person. she'll probably get me to crack a belt on her or something.
Oh well. I'll pretend to not enjoy that if she says it.
The next day, Omnus' POV
I wake up early, probably around six judging by the hourglasses on the wall, they're rigged so that when one is full another starts.
I get up and go to the fridge (Hey I have been here for over a thousand years, I managed to rig up some electronics) And get out some manticore bacon.
I took some culinary classes, and I worked as a butcher's apprentice for about a year.
Getting the pan on the oven (gem powered, basically an electric) and putting some butter in it, I start mashing some potatoes and frying them along with the bacon. Ill do some eggs afterwards. Jane wakes up and sniffs the air. "Cooked brekky?" she says as i nod my head. "You don't do that very often, whats up?" She asks.
"Jane." I deadpan "I just got you back. Remember how in doctor who how he said its sort of a timey wimey gibberish or something?" She nods "Well I've been here for over a thousand years, most spent alone and looking for you."
"Oh well," she says... Just like Jane to understate something "Wait, a thousand years? But, but that makes you like. OLD!" Ok then Jane. Ok. Two can play at that game.
"Respect your elders young missy, I'll not have you being so flippant in front of your 'betters'" I say.
"Really big bro... Now your starting to sound like grandpa!" She says... That was the point
"Thats the point Jane, I don't like being reminded that I'm older than the princesses." I say... DUMBASS DUMBASS DUMBASS!
"Are the princesses the white on with the flow-y rainbow hair and the dark blue mean one?" she asks. Okay Jane. Well, Ok.
"Yes." Is all I say. "The food ready so do you mind grabbing those plates for me?" I jerk my head towards a stack of plates, stacked in a rack.
"Sure." she says.
We start eating breakfast, I'm thinking about introducing her to Faust, (Fausty is the only one that knew I had a sister... A mistake on my part I now realise.)
"Wacha thinking about?" She says, snapping me out of my daze.
"Oh i'm just thinking about introducing you to a friend of mine. Say, what kind of punishment should I give Luna, Thats the blue one."
"Who's the friend?" she asks "And i dunno, maybe you could spank her or something? like, a LOT of spanks."
"The friends name is Faust. She doesn't live to far from here. I could probably take you to her once we're done eating. And I kinda thought you would say that with the spanks. I swear you have a-" I cut myself off. She's only ten I'm not giving her The Talk.
"Have a what?" she asks, innocently.
"an obsession." I say, "So, wanna meet Faust?"
"Is she like the blue one?"
"no, she's more like Celestia, the white one."
"Ok then, I like her!"
To do that which I was asked.
Faust's Caverns, Omnus' POV
"Remember to be polite. And no touching random things." I say as we're walking down the caves, me holding a ball of fire for her to see... And totally not because it makes me even more awesome
"Or what?" Jane giggles, shoving me... while I have a BALL OF RAW FIRE IN MY HANDS.
"Or I will bring you to her in a hot pink dress after I doll you up a lot." I deadpan.
"Fine." She replies. "So what does she look like? Is she as old as you? Are you dating her?" She asks, repeatedly.
"I- I'm sorry?" I stutter out "What was that last one?"
"Oh My god you are aren't you!" She squeals.
"No! no we aren't dating. Just friends." I say.
"Uh huh. sure." she says, rolling her eyes "And the other two questions? how old is she and whats she look like?"
"Well we're here so I'm not answering them!" I exclaim. THANK THE LORD VOIDY PANTS MCMUFFGEE!
I knock on her door and wait a minute, before knocking again.
This isn't like her, normally she opens it before I even knock. Badass alicorn bullshit it is but still.
I knock again after another minute passes before opening the door myself (She gave me a key ages ago).
The place was trashed, Furniture thrown around the room... Blast marks on the wall. Oh fuck is that a blood splatter!
"Sis, Im going to put you in a safe place for a minute. stay there and don't move." I say.
"O-okay" she manages to say, wide eyed.
I use some bending to make sure that she goes under ground, into a chamber that I just created.
I look around, following the blast marks and blood stains to the bedroom.
God, if the living room was bad, this was worse. Piles of ash, telling me that there was probably more than one assailants.
A grey top-hat with His mark is laying there, on top of one of the piles. As I see this I abandon all caution and sprint to the bedroom door.
I bash it down and with a resounding BANG it hits the floor.
There are so many pile of ash in this room... One of them is bigger than most...
"No-no-no-no-no-no." I say, rushing over the room, sweeping ash out of the way. I reach the big pile and sweep that away to.
'Oh thank Raptor Jesus!" I exclaim, relieved to find a badly broken alicorn at the bottom of it.
"Faust, Faust are you alright?" I say, poking her after checking her pulse and breathing.
She doesn't respond.
"Hmmm, She has to stay here if we want to keep Him contained, but he'll probably just send more goons after her and it won't matter. Oh fuck it you're coming with me." I say to myself, lifting her up and carrying her towards the exit.
I may have almost forgotten Jane... Oops.
I'm not telling her that though.
As we were running through the tunnels I noticed a small yellow glowing orb... and another. and another. lots. of. orbs.
HOW THE FUCK DID I NOT REALISE! They must be security cameras for Him or Faust. I'm guessing Him.
They started chasing us and I lost form, shifting into a slime basically, solidifying my outer surface so I didn't eat Faust and Jane.
I grabbed jane and went as fast as I could, going through tunnel after tunnel. We made it to the surface in record time, but I didn't slow down.
If they could do that to Fausty what could they do to me when I had to defend both of them?
"Why are we only doing this now!?" Screamed Jane, as I teleported to the cabin. Quickly making a simple wooden couch with magic (Cushions included) and put Faust on the bed.
"Magic-proof rocks. Nothing can pass through them." I say as I levitate the medical kit over to the bed. Luckily Faust taught me about Pony anatomy so I could just cast an examination spell and set the bones based off of that.
Holy Fuck how is she even alive!? She has fifteen broken ribs, both of her clavicles are shattered and Her kneecaps have been broken... Both. Kneecaps. They would have had to hold her still since thats the only part of the leg that was broken... oh fuck Jane needs to leave.
"Jane? I need you to go and just wait outside. Don't wander." I say, I don't know if it was the tone of my voice or the fact that Faust was really bad but she did it without a word.
I started to use magic to fix the ribs back in place, putting magic splints to they wouldn't move much (I made it so they wouldn't interfere with any organs either)
I will only ever say this once. Do. Not. Try. To. Fix. A. Shattered. Bone. I ended up having to actually remove them, piece by piece, replacing them with iron ones (after fixing the cartilage obviously).
The kneecaps were the easiest. teleport the halves out and replace with iron.
I gave her some painkillers I had in the Med-kit (Needle form, duh) and just let her rest. I would check on her every fifteen minutes or when she inevitably woke up and pani- "AAAAAAIIIIHIHH!" Oh hello Murphy! Good of you to finally show up!
Sadly I was sitting next to her and she still has the royal Canterlot voice... And she screamed... OW!
"Hey, hey, calm down Faust, It's only me. Only me." I said, with the softest voice I could manage when my ears didn't exist.
"The painkillers should set in in about another minute so just hang on and squeeze my hand eh?" I say... Oh wait alicorn strength.
I quickly turn my hand gelatinous yet solid before she starts squeezing.
It still hurts but its more like a strong handshake now... from the a gorilla
"I'm going to cast a pain transfer spell." I say.
I cast the spell and immediately start to writhe on the floor, pure agony coursing through my shoulders, legs and ribs. I don't think I screamed... Or else.
After a minute of torture it calmed down. I should have given her a sleeping drug.
I get up and start talking to her. After calling Jane in of course.
"Well that was fun wasn't it?" I say.
She asked Sis to slap me for that... and she did it.
"Et Tu Jane?" I say. "Oh by the way this is my little sis, Jane."
"Well I'm glad you finally found her. But where am I... Wait did you take me out of... oh dear." She says, finally realising where we are.
"Yes I took you out of the seal. He already got goons down there and you were unconscious. It was either let you die or save you so..."
"There was a seal down there? Why didn't we see it it woulda been adorable. Can we go back and see it?" Says Jane... I forgot she's clueless about magic...
"No, no, this isn't an animal seal it's a seal as in 'I'm sealing the door' or 'oh dear he just sealed us in Auschwitz'."
"Oh... damn." Huh, thought she would've ben a bit more disappointed over that.
"Back to the point," said Faust, unamused (Are you not entertained?!) "We should figure out what we're going to do next. Once I heal up I may go and see my daughters." I don't even realise that I growled at that last part until she asked me "Wait, why are you growling, did I do something?"
"No, no. It's just..." I sigh "I know for a fact that Luna was starving Jane, and i'm pretty sure she was going to torture her based off of what she screamed as I broke into and out of prison for her. Celestia..." I look to jane to see her shaking her head. "Celestia didn't, apparantly, and knowing those two Tia didn't even know about Luna's... methods."
Faust was wide-eyed. Shocked (I'm guessing) at Luna's actions and words. Now that I think about it it's a bit odd having a diarchy, I mean, really, Night and day, black ops and field ops, and the world hasn't been burnt to the ground yet? Waaaaiiit... they returned to the exact same system as before Nightmare Moon...
"we... well.... I will certainly be having... words... with Luna when I get there... Hmmmmm. maybe eating only sugar for a year will do... get her sick of sweets forever..." she said, thinking out loud (That just evil... I hope she does it!) "Anyway, that has to wait until after i've healed. Thank you Omnus. I really don't know what would have happened if you hadn't..."
"Hey don't worry about it, what are friends for?" Her eyes flicker down a bit as i say that "Oh by the way, some of your bones are now and Iron - Aluminium Alloy so don't try lightning spells... and try to avoid getting them cast at you.
"I will Omny, and thank you, once again." She says, as she falls back asleep.
"You two are totally dating aren't you?" asks Jane.
To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 9 - Comforting and Spies
I walking through the forest, just hunting for some fruits and a pig, when I heard a sniffle, like someone was crying, so, with my bow strung and an arrow notched I stalked towards the sound, you could never be to careful in this forest.
I arrived at a hill that had a sharp drop into a ravine, what I saw shocked me, Dux Luporum, the demigod of wolves, was sitting there at the top, crying her eyes out.
Now I suppose I should say why this shocked me, Dux has never cried, not when her husband died, not when she saw her children killed, not even when the ponies started stealing the fruit needed for her wolves to mate (The Fruit of Fertility, 'Zap Apples'). So to see her crying...
"Dux?" I asked, at the edge of the clearing, "What's happened?" I approached the top, almost jogging over.
"Leave me be, Omnus." She said, turning her head to the cliff and huffing.
"Uh... no" I said, "Now tell me, what's got you like this?"
"Leave, Me, Be, Omnus, I will not talk of this." She growled.
"Very well, We won't talk, but I'm not going to leave." I said, sitting down next to her and putting my hand on her withers.
"Stubborn Ape." Was all she said.
"Human."
"Does it matter?"
"To you? God no, but where I came from it was a pretty big insult to call someone an ape, so it does to me."
"Very well... Ape"
I started Idly scratching her, being that she is an actual wolf, not a Timber Wolf, I could actually do this. She didn't object, instead relaxing into my hand, she stopped crying after a couple minutes
We sat like that for hours, just sitting at the edge of the cliff, until she said, "Thank you Omnus." and stood up to leave.
I watched her go, sitting there for a few more seconds before resuming my hunt.
Omnus' Shack, Everfree Forest. Omnus POV
I walked up to the shack and I could here arguing inside.
"We have to find him Miss Faust! Its a forest! What if he got lost, what if he got eaten!?" Said Jane, Getting herself into a panic
"Do not worry child, Omnus has been in this forest for almost a millenia, he knows it better than you know the back of your hand, besides, Your brother pretty much can't die." Said Faust, attempting to waylay her fears, although I could hear the worry in her voice.
"Faust is right you know, never seen something that can kill me sadly" I say, walking into the house, with Faust glaring at me, promising retribution for the last word, I assume.
"Marky your home!" Said jane, rushing over and hugging me.
"And with food!" I say back, holding up two bags, one with some meat and one with fruit and vegetables, "Sorry about the smell Faust"
"It's no problem, I know the smell, you forget I was the queen, I had to go to many carnivorous countries for my diplomatic duties."
"Very well, I'm going to start cooking, Just a simple fruit salad for now Faust, and the same with some bacon for you Jane, But I will be popping into town later to get some proper cooking food."
"It is fine, Omnus."
As I cooked we talked, talked about how things had been, I had asked if she wanted to talk to them and she said... No, suprisingly, she told me to just let her cool off for a bit with the recent news.
Celestia POV, Canterlot Castle
I was pacing in my personal study, wonder just how child ! Added on top of that was the fact that she was clearly related to Omny, being that they had the same eyes and dainty nose, as well as the same suspicious gaze, nomatter what they do its always on there. I smile as i start to think back to when I was little, he seemed confused over the fact that I had hugged him and given him a flower. Of course, from the right angle he always looks confused.
I chuckle, and of course, the door opens, admitting my nephew, Prince Blueblood.
"Yes, Blueblood?" I ask, knowing it was something important if he came to my study to tell me.
"My spies have finally gotten back to me, Auntie. They say they saw him heading into the Everfree Forest with the little one." Said Blueblood, once again proving his use as a Spymaster.
"Thank you Blueblood, Have you sent any of them inside?" I question
"I was merely waiting on your word to send Ms Sweetie Drops. She lives in Ponyville under the name, Bon Bon, so she already has a base of operations." He said, hesitating slightly on the last part.
"But?" I say, dreading what she would cost.
"Well, Auntie, She owns a business so we would need to cover her average income per day, as well as the Everfree fee." He said.
"And how much is this?" I ask, resigned to my fate.
"Per day she makes, generally, 100 bits, Then theres the Everfree fee, another three thousand bits. So if we want her in there for five days, the usual time, it would cost 3500 bits." He said, bringing out the forms.
"Do it, and make sure to tell her that she is not to harm anypony this time." I say, only wishing to know what he's doing.
"Very well Auntie, She will enter the forest tomorrow" With that he left, taking the paperwork with him.
Now then, back to what to do with Luna. I never thought she would go that far. I need a suitable punishment but i can't have it become public...
Hmmm, what if I send her out into the Badlands, with provisions of course, and make her walk back without magic.
But Twilight will probably wonder where she went, I can't just confine her to her room or send her back to the moon either.
Actually, Discord might have a suitable punishment, if only i was able to talk to him, If he's alive I may be able to, but I don't want to know if the elements killed my uncle, I mean, he is the Spirit of Chaos so a large does of Harmony magic might have.. .No, no, Bad Tia, stay off of this topic, you did the same thing whne you worried about Lulu and wouldn't have been able to rule without Omnus.
Omnus POV, Everfree Forest
I was scrying, thats attempting to see what others are doing, trying to see what Luna was doing at the moment. All I saw was her just laying on her bed, like a child having been sent to her room.
"Wacha doooin?" Asked jane, obviously bored.
I shrugged "Eh, not much, just spying on Luna. Why?"
"Wanna play with us? It's Monopoly."She said, with a grin.
"Fine. But if i'm playing I'm going Cor-pirate Execute-ive." I say (If i play i'm going to win).
"Do I want to know what that means?" Asked Faust, with the board resting on a table beside the bed she was laying on.
"It means I'm-" I begin to say
"Going to lose badly!" interupted Jane.
"Nuhp Ima gon win." I say, folding my arms and turning my nose up.
"Prove it." Said Faust.
"Oh it is SO on."
Dux's POV, Everfree Forest. Ponos Rock
As I lay on top of Ponos Rock, I look out at the forest, wondering how, in such a place as this, a place where it's eat or be eaten, some beings still have enough room in their hearts to look out for... People, I like that term, outside of their own packs.
I let loose a howl of contentment, before entering the cave and laying my head down, closing my eyes to go to sleep.
unknown POV, Everfree Forest, Ponos Rock, 15 minutes later
I enter the cave, there, at the wall furthest away, lies one of THEM, one of the ones who ruined my plan. I shall not fail again, But the Lord of Balance would sense it if she died, So I will have to settle for imprisoning them for now.
And when the striking surface it hot, I will RUIN him, he took my Wife from me, I'll take EVERYTHING from him, all of his supposed friends, the Whore and her two daughters, the Demigods of the Wild, that Bitch of Sombra's, that beast brother of Tirek's, the Spirit of Chaos,
ALL OF THEM WILL SUFFER FOR WHAT HE DID TO ME!
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To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 10 - Fluttershy? Fluttercry. Flutterterrify.
"Hum diddly hum he diddly he, fuck eti fuck." I sang quietly as I started sprinting away from the house, jumping into the air and changing into a pigeon, flying strait up so that I would be out of the canopy.
As I flew toward Ponyville I noticed someone heading towards the Everfree, she had a blue and pink mane and a faded yellow coat, she was acting a bit suspicious though, at least, suspicious for a pony, which is completely guilty for everything else, dashing from tree to tree, looking around as if she was afraid of someone seeing her, so i decided to follow her, landing on branches near her and listening as she talked to herself.
"Okay okay, relax Sweet, It's just the Everfree and all you have to do is find a dangerous... oh Faust oh Faust what'll I do! Can i just send the money back? yeah, thats what I'll do, I'll just send Blueblood his money back and be done with it, ahahhahahah he can get somepony else to risk THEIR lives! HAH!"
I was amused by this and decided to... mess with her a bit, i glided down and landed on her shoulder, cooing to get her attention, she looked back at me and said,
"If you dump on me I will end you!"
"Relax," I said, causing her to stare at me in shock, "I'm not going to shit on you, I just want to know who your after in the Forest."
She hesitated, then replied, "Well, I suppose... I'm after a pony named Omnus Compositae, supposudly he broke into and destroyed the Royal Dungeons, and escaped with a dangerous convict."
"Do you know what he looks like, I may have seen him in my flights."
"No, I was only told he was unusual, and had no magic to sense."
"Then I'm afraid the Everfree will be no help, everything is layered in chaos in there."
"I was going to abandon the contract anyway, to dangerous in there."
"Well then..." I said, then promptly dumped a load off... if you know what I mean.
"HEY! GET BACK HERE YOU BUCKING BIRD!"
Ponyville, 5 Minutes Later, Omnus' POV
I shifted into the form of a unicorn, grey with a purple mane, and walked into town, grabbing a bag of bits from home and making a satchel.
I walked into the market, looking around to see what was on offer. Applejack was selling apples, Roseluck was selling Daisy, Daisy was selling Lili, Lili was selling flowers... Those three are VERY weird... I'm gonna go talk to them.
"Hey girls!" I said, as i walked over.
"Hey Mr. Watcher!" They said in unison
"I was walking by when i noticed two beautiful young mares were being sold, and i just had to stop by." I chuckled.
Daisy and Rose flattened their ears, shuffling nervously.
"Hey, don't worry, I'm here for some flower, just be careful, never know what kind of pony will see you."
"Yes Mister Watcher." They said, with relieved looks in their eye.
"So, can i get a bouquet of tulips?" I asked
"Yep!" Lili said, the others were to busy looking 'inconspicuous'.
"Awesome, how much?"
"Only one bit! We have a sale on common flowers right now."
"Alright, well here we go, have a nice day girls!" I said, walking cheerily down the road.
I wandered around for a bit, eventually deciding to go to the library. As i started jogging down the main street, which had numerous government buildings on it, I heard someone crying gently, more of a sobbing really.
I head in the sounds direction, oddly enough it was coming from a small path out of town, toward where I knew Fluttershy's house was, I started sprinting down the path, the noise growing louder, until I saw Fluttershy, bawling her eyes out in front of her house's... burnt remains...
"Miss Fluttershy?" I called. "Do you need help?"
She didn't answer, her sobbing only increasing.
Some animals started coming out, for some reason they could see through my disguise, they had always trusted me, confusingly enough.
I jogged the rest of the way to her, and put my hand on her shoulder.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt at all?" I asked, begged really. Her sobbing started dying down.
"You can always build a new house, I could pay if you don't have enough bits."
"I- it's not the house that i'm crying about, I had all my pictures of my mother and father in there. A-And now they're..." She started sobbing again.
"I think you need these more than I do," I said, handing her the tulips I bought "If you'll allow it, I could find some paper and use a spell to get them from your memories and put them into a picture."
"Please, please do."
"Alright Miss Fluttershy."
I sprinted into town, buying some paper from someone called Feather Note, and sprinted back, by the time i was done I was quite winded.
"If-if you'll just hold still for a second" I said,
She nodded and I activated my horn, focusing on her memories and basically copy-pasting them onto the paper, one by one. The process only took about a minute but by the end of it I had used a good portion of my magic.
"THANK YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH!" She practically screamed, launching herself and throwing her arms around me.
I fell down onto the ground, with her still clinging to me and now sobbing into my shoulder. I should mention she's barely shorter than me in my human form (5"5'), and my pony form is actually taller than human form, around 6".
"You have a place to stay?" I asked, prepared to offer my 'home' that I had built forty years ago, near the outskirts of town but now as far out as her's.
"Oh, i wouldn't want to bother you! And you are a busy stallion, I wouldn't want to take up to much time." She said, her voice growing more confident.
"Nonsense! You wouldn't be a problem. Come on, I'll make you a nice cup of tea while I set up a guest bedroom for you hmm?"
"Thank you." Was all she said.
A half hour later and she was set up in one of my guest bedrooms. Having made sure she would be fine and that the fridge was stocked in case she got peckish, I set back out to the library, this time making it the entire way.
I knocked on the door, not expecting Spike to answer right away. So, of course, he did.
"Oh hey. You here to talk to Twilight?" He asked, flippantly.
"Yes I am Mr?" I said.
"Twilight! Someones here!" He called, then invited me in, saying "My names Spike, what's yours?"
"I'm Watcher, nice to meet you, Mr. Spike."
"I'll be down in just a minute!" Called Twilight,
When she finally came down, she was dressed in a plain white dress shirt and purple skirt.
"Hello! What are you looking for today?"
"Oh I was just going to look for books on ancient history, I'm interested in following up a note I found about a fellow name Omnus Compositae." I said, simultaneously teleporting a fake Journal into the archives in the Everfree Castle.
"Wait, you know about Omnus? WHERE DID YOU FIND THAT NOTE!" She shouted, grabbing me and shaking me like a teen with a soft drink.
"Woah Woah WOAH! Hey, Let me go!" I started struggling, playing to the old-man/stallion card.
"TELL ME!" She screamed in my face, then freaking blasted me with magic through the window, I landed on my back, and felt glass shards go into my skin, causing me to bleed profusely.
I cried out in pain, only to feel her magic pick me up and slam me into the ground.
"TELL ME WHERE!" She expelled, slamming me once more into the ground and breaking my horn, we had drawn a crowd at this point.
"Okay, Okay, just stop, Please!" I begged, trying to play the crowd a bit, it appeared to be working.
"Twilight Stop!" I heard Fluttershy shout, the magic aura disappeared from around me, allowing me to flop back down to the ground,
As I layeed there, grounding in pain, I was thinking about just how powerful Twilight would have to be to make me bleed, Only five beings that I know of can make me bleed, Discord, Faust, Him, the being inside me, and Harmony - who disappeared and left the Elements of Harmony, and now Twilight...
"How dare you beat an old stallion! What do you ha- " I tuned Fluttershy out as a doctor arrived, turning me over and starting to remove all the glass embedded in my back.
"This'll sting a lot." He said, then started disinfecting with what I think was rubbing alcohol, I merely moaned in pain.
As soon as the doc was done disinfecting he cast a healing spell on me, fixing up all my wounds and removing my pain.
He also grew my horn back but whatever.
"You THREW HIM OUT OF A WINDOW BECAUSE HE ASKED YOU A QUESTION?!?! " I heard Flutters screech as I stood up shakily.
I looked around and saw the crowd, ever growing, muttering angrily, It's rather well known that I (in this form at least) make big trips into the Everfree and then head to the library to do some research, before staying for a while and going back in. I suppose they thought Twiight had tried to kill me... which she very well might have, temporarily at least.
"Calm down Miss Fluttershy, I'm fine and Miss Sparkle is... uh.... well, crazy if i'm honest. I'm going to go to canterlot and look in their library, may as well follow up my lead."
"Oh, are- are you sure Watcher? I mean, you did just get thrown out of a window, I could help you if you want." Said Fluttershy, drawing back into herself.
"I'm fine Miss Fluttershy, and besides, you're the one meant to be taking it easy, I've still got many a year left in me yet You just watch!" I said, laughing at the last bit.
Another half hour later and I was in Canterlot, travelling to various markets and teleporting the food I bought back to my forest home for the others to eat.
I got the the Public Archives in the palace and started looking through the index for any reference to any other immortals' names, I couldn't find any, no immortals at all. Not Grogar, not Tirok, not Tirek, not even Discord had a paragraph, he was called "The Spirit of Chaos and Discord, like a Windego* he only appears when the element he represents (chaos) runs rampant. *See pg 1911 for more information."
I stormed out of the archives and teleported to my home, telling Faust how much I found, how they had erased every immortal from history.
I finally went to bed after getting Jane in her's and giving Faust some more painkillers.
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To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 11 - Battle Against Insanity and Exhaustion.
"To what do I owe the pleasure Brother??" I said, sitting on top of Canterlot Mountain at one in the morn, taking in the beauty of the sky while sitting in the Glowing Mineral Pond.
He faded into the light and started speaking. "Things are moving Brother. They are picking up pace and even I cannot see what will happen."
"That... That is most disturbing. Are you able to do or tell me anything? anything at all?" I asked, worried now.
"I can only tell you these three things. One, He and Omnia have allied themselves." He said, making me inhale sharply "And two, you are not strong enough."
"They... Allied themselves together!" I almost shouted "What does He thinks he's doing, He has never wanted to destroy us, merely conquer us, like a game."
"I fear that He has gone mad, which also explains Faust's condition." He said. "I will train you to be a better warrior soon, or would you prefer to be a better mage?"
"Both, if I can, and what is the third thing?" I asked, sincerely worried.
"I can do that, number three. Omnia... has Dux." He said, hesitating.
"Fuck!" I exclaimed, "Are you going to join us? Or do you have to stay neutral?"
"I will be, yes. However, I cannot fight front line, He cursed me to never wield a blade against another, remember?"
"Oh thank god!" I exclaimed, letting out a breath I didn't know I had been holding. "Are you able to start helping now?"
"Slightly, yes. For instance the blades I will be training you in is more of a stave..." He said, Pulling out a chrome cylinder, with a red button on the side and dark stripes at the center.
"Is that-" I began to ask.
"A double-bladed lightsaber? yes. The crystal is quartz-like, to contrast your crown." He said, activating it and showing me the white-light emitting plasma of the blade. "So... Shall we get started?"
"One second, I need to fanlord"
"Fanlord?"
"I do not merely 'fanboy'."
Omnus' Shack, 5 hours later.
"So, Where were you?" Faust asks as I step through the door.
"Getting beat on by Uby. He... can certainly use a stave..." I say, trailing off slightly.
"You hesitated. What. Else." She said, stressing each word.
"Well... We think that He finally snapped, and that thats why he tried to kill you." I admitted, holding back the information about her 'dead' husband...
"Huh, well that would explain that. Oh by the way I'm not dying."
"I figured, We are ageless after all... me especially considering I can just change my face." I joked. God, that reminds me of the time me and Uby went to a council meeting together, he had the mind-blowing idea to make me look like him, just to see what would happen... needless to say they were scared shitless.
"Yes, I remember well from our..." she looked over to the sleeping form of Jane. "Nights."
There was no stress-leave in that castle let me tell you.
POV ???? The Immediate Void
"So you are going to help them?" A voice says in the black of The Void.
"No, I'm going to make sure that he does not snap. His sanity is barely even a twig at this point." Ubuze says to the Darkness
"Surely it can not be that that bad if he does?"
"He can consume Nothing and Everything." He deadpans. "The Void would be devoured as nothing more than a snack."
"Sweet Author"
"Exactly, The Author would have to reset the entire Multiverse, possibly some of the Omniverse!"
"Then you have our aid, Ubuze, Lord of the Void, Become our champion in the endeavour to aid his sanity."
"This I shall."
"Then do it, temporary Spirit of the Void."
Omnus' POV
"Alright. Lets see if you can stand." I say as I look at Faust, examining her with medical knowledge built up over the course of a thousand years. "Your knees may be a little stiff, that'll be there no matter what though, side effect of having an unnatural material inside of you."
"Shut up Omn, I know what I'm doing!" She said, attempting to push me away as I help her up.
"Alright then." I smirk as I let go entirely.
She smirks at me, standing as if she doesn't have new knees. "I told you so."
"Then let's walk to Canterlot shall we?" I said, narrowing my eyes at her and smirking even more.
"Woa-" She starts to panic, then gets control of herself. "Alright, let's." Wiping my smirk off my face.
"A- are you sure?" I ask, my eyes widening slightly.
"Yep, Let's go, You should probably write a note for Jane though."
"I was going to, just wanted to make sure you're up for the challenge."
"Challenge... right.."
Twilight,Third person POV, Ponyville
"Why did I snap at that stallion? I just felt so angry and, It's like I was... POSSESSED! " She suddenly yelled, her mane frizzy and unkempt, coat greasy and dirty, with tear streaks that had long dried up running down from her eyes to her jaw.
"Bwah!" Shouted Spike, as he jumped in surprise and felt the ladder shift under him. Throwing him safely onto the pile of returned books he was putting away.
"Spike, would you stop sleeping and grab my schedule please?!"
"But I- " Spike sighed "Sure Twi."
"Actually, just rearrange it please, I've got to go explain to my friends why I hurt that stallion like that!"
"Uhhh... Sure Twi, I'm sure that'll go well." Spike said himself as Twilight ran out the door and down the road.
"She is soo doomed.." He said, knowing that this would likely be irreparable.
Twilight ran up the hill to the Carousel Boutique, having ignored the glares of the townspeople all the way there.
She knocked on the door and heard a "It's open!" from inside.
She rushed in and said "Rarity, I just want you to-" and was cut off by a curt,
"And just what are you doing here Twilight?!"
"I'm here to tell you why I did what I did to that stallion!"
"Exactly what possible reason could there be for attacking a pony, especially one who just happens to be a good friend of mine?!" Said Rarity, almost screaming.
"I was possessed!"
"By what?"
"Well, I-"
"Do you even have any proof?"
"Wel-"
"Then get out."
Twilights eyes widened. "But I-"
"You are banned from my store Miss Sparkle!"
"Rar-"
"Do not make me call the guard Miss Sparkle." Hissed Rarity.
"Yes Rarity..." Twilight sighed. Then started to walk home, dragging her feet and attempting to figure out how to prove she was possessed.
Omnus' POV, Canterlot Mountain top
"Are you done yet?" I ask Faust as she comes up the mountain path.
"No... I... Will... Win!" she exclaims as she lunges forward toward the rock jutting out the top of the platform we are now on.
"Woah there! No lunging, who knows what could-" I say as I catch her, turning her over to find her passed out. "Right... You passed out."
I summon a piece of paper as well as a quill and ink. "Well you certainly won in my book." I gently say as I write a small note to Jane to explain that I wouldn't be home until tomorrow morning, and to stay in the cottage until I got back.
I put her down, retracting the extra arms I had made back into my body. "I guess we're sleeping out here tonight... May as well get you comfortable." I mumble to myself as I summon a Queen-sized bed for us and put her on it, laying on her side.
I then cast a notice-me-not spell around us, so that no one would see anything out of the ordinary, I then yawned and laid down on the other side of the bed, closing my eyes and going to sleep.
To do that which I was asked.
If anyone does end up finding my place and reading MY PRIVATE JOURNALS then you should probably find out who i am, i mean you only have my name at this point. So i’ll give you a small description of me so you know who it is ripping your insides out when you turn around, ey?
Well I guess I should start with species, I am a Human, scientific name Homo Sapiens, or at least I used to be, I guess now I’m a Shape shifter / Form shifter. My history is unimportant so that wont be going in here, basically I look like a Furless ape of some sort, which would be half correct, as humans were part of the Ape Kingdom when we were still non-sapient yet sentient.
So you found a little old 'cabin' in the woods and decided to investigate? the only thing i can say about that would be the word, "Foolish." Screams are heard throughout the Everfree forest, the bigger animals waiting, knowing that if they showed themselves that whatever it is wouldn't be the only thing caught by the Thing.
Om. Nes?. My name is at the tip of my tongue… Omnes, Omnes Compositae. I had almost forgotten who I am I have been here so long. Out here in this lush, green jungle-like forest.
But that doesn’t matter at the moment, what matters is that I need to go hunting this morning, I’m almost out of meat.
So I went off hunting, i had set up some critter traps to catch rabbits and the like but, much to my dismay, they were all broken, however from the tracks it looked as if whatever is was that fucked up my traps would be big enough to get a bunch of meals out of and small enough to actually kill, a manticore, most likely.
So I set off, going as quietly as I could, having unslung my shitty bow earlier, i wasn't exactly green beret before I got here... Actually I was only seventeen when I got here I laughed quietly, thinking about all I had gone through, but thats enough reminiscing, says my stomach, grumbling like a 6 year old whale.
There it is, sitting on that rock, I still haven't figured out why a predator would sunbathe on the edge of the middle in a clearing, but this world is kinda fucked up like that. It was facing toward me, but the wind was going in my direction so that should hold my scent off of him for a bit longer. I silently nocked an arrow (I designed some stone Broadhead arrows) and carefully took aim, directing the middle of the bow just above the eyeball, from this far I couldn't miss.
I let go of the string, the arrow sliced through the air, just as the manticore yawned. OH SHIT. The arrow hit the eye, but didn't get the brain, I quickly took aim again and fired as the manticore was roaring in pain. This time i manage to put the arrow in one of it's nostrils, and it fell silent as the broadheads jiggled in its brain. reducing it to sludge... yeah I'm not grabbing the nose arrow. I quickly pulled the arrow in it's eye out, and then skinned it and started stripping meat of the bones quickly.
I got back and my warning note was still in the door (and I mean on top of the actual door, under the frame) so no one had found my house. Not that I expected anyone to, but it pays to be careful. I believe that I’ll be going back to civilisation this week. After all, while I was hunting I saw a royal chariot go toward that little pony settlement out on the edge of the forest.
And so, with that in mind, I set out, into the Mountain of the Dragon, who’s name was Ferro Ungue I had learned (through accidentally beating the crap out of him) i went down through the miles of tunnel, with only the light of my torch and slightly glowing eyes to guide me.
It took me many hours (two, to be exact) but eventually I found the door, the door to judgement, the door to- “Come in Deary, it isn’t healthy to stand out there in the damp like that” I heard her say from inside, her voice brought a small smile to my lips, as it always does, the kind of smile you keep reserved for your grandma, who always has those special cookies ready for you, even when she didn’t know you were coming.
“Just a minute, I need to catch my breath after that long walk, I still don’t know why you had to put your home in a cave network of all things! I mean, It takes hours just to get to the surface!” I said, jokingly, as we had had this conversation before.
“Bah! The exercise will do you good I say!” She cackled, I merely chuckled, as men do not giggle, as i joined her at the table where she already had a teapot set out along with some biscuits, cups and saucers.
“So, Faust, how are we today? Anything new in this old place?” I ask, more out of courtesy than curiosity.
“Well, let’s see shall we? Bones are still creaking and groaning. Hearts failing-“
I spat out my tea, luckily into the bin she had ready, her magic aura looking slightly paler than usual now that I think about it.
“Excuse me!? Did you say your HEART was FAILING!?!” I emphasised while gently screaming, gently because she's a bit old, screaming because she said her FUCKING HEART WAS FAILING!
“Oh yes dear, and do wipe your mouth would you? It appears I only have a couple more years left in me.” she stated, matter of faculty while still telling me off for my bad table manners.
“Dear god, I- well I am sorry, but I would think my sympathies would not go un-tanned. Have you got anything that you want to do? Because I found that artefact that you were talking about, the one to let you speak with anyone as long as I was there.” I asked with concern while still hinting that she can now talk to her daughters again.
“You Have! Thats Amazing!” Faust somehow lent over the table and i swore i heard my bones snapping with the strength of the hug she gave me, “ Can you please go and get my daughters together? The only thing I want to do is talk to them again.”
“You didn’t even need to ask, I’m here to help you after all…” i sighed “ I wish that I could free you, but that would release Him as well.”
“We have already talked about that dear. Now then, Run along! Hop to it! I want to talk to them again. And leave the device here would you? Thank you.” She somehow got me into another bone crushing hug, and I think she may have been crying, judging from the wetness on my shoulder.
And so with that I set off, To find (and reunite) the Royal Sisters.
To Torture the Lord of Chaos himself.
To fuck with people a bit.
To fight the not-so-bad guys.
To discover that the elements of ‘harmony’ aren't all they’re cracked up to be.
And to help an old, dying friend.
View Online
To do that which I was asked.
Chapter 2 - Purple Ponies Plus The Peposturous Past
“Right, well now we just need to wake him up!” was the first thing i heard, though it sounded oddly muffled. As i tried to get my vision un-blurred i heard someone say
“well just dump some water on him *Purple*.” (No respect will be given to her until she stops being so naive).
“If you do I will most certainly not be pleased.” I said, finally recovering my vision to find trying to move, discovering i was strapped to a big, circular machine. (Think smaller version of The Incredibles cuff-prison) with other machines beeping and recording information. ‘Huh, How did i miss those beeps?’ I wonder, slightly bemused.
“Oh your awake!” *Purple* says sounding excited.
“No my name is Omnus, not excited,” I deadpan, “Now why am I hear? And why am i cuffed like this?”
“ Well then Ominous-“
“My name is not Ominous, it is Omnus. As i just said.”
“well Sorry ‘Omnus’ *What a terrible name*” she says, almost to quite to hear at that last part. I decide not to comment about vampires. “But, anyway, I want to study you, so you just answer some questions and ill just jot it down here! Ok? Then well get to Finding out how resilient you are!”
“Did the princesses-“
“PrincESS!” she says, emphasising the ‘ess'.
“Princesses”
“Princess!”
“Princesses”
“Princess!”
“Princesses”
“Princess!”
“Princess”
“Princesses!!”
“Oh good, you agree with me that both of them are princesses.”
“Wha- but, never mind.”
“The answer to my question?”
“Yes the princesS knows about this, she was curious herself.” She said, Nervously glancing back and forth… I forgot how bad ponies are at lying ( except for the direct royal family, after all, I taught them how!).
“Uh huh,” I reply, shifting into the form of a kookaburra and laughing at her “I’ll just go check with THEM if you don’t mind, bye-bye Purple!”
“No, Wai-“ is all i hear, already leaving through an open window… I was under a tree-house… alrighty then.
As I was flying towards the Everfree Castle I noticed another catle off a ways, on mount Canterlot… hmm now that I'm thinking about horse puns I wonder what happened to Gallophrey, oh well.
I decided to go check out that castle instead, i mean, i was making good time anyway and it looks so SHINY and bright… and i’m a bird… Ok i’m going to shit on peoples heads then kooks-call them. But I’m also going to check out the castle so *Sticks young out somehow*
I arrived at the bright and shiny castle-city-fortress-thing and think, ‘ Oh My God it looks a lot like those fairy tales of Camelo- oh wait. it is exactly that isn't it… Oh well, one way to find out! To wherever the throne room is!
I was in the throne room, just sitting on top of the throne, when Tia and the innocent side of Lu walked in, saying
“We must find him sister! He said he hath a message for us and he hath been gone for two days!” from Lu.
“What, only want to find me because of the message?” I said, shifting forms and angling my left off the top of the glorified chair.
“Wha- NO!” Lu was blushing at this point, I don’t think she thought those words through before she said them.
“We wanted to hear the message, but we are happy that you are okay Omny!” Tia said, looking adorable form the blush, but still hot from the eye thing. “Where were you anyway?”
“Oh me? That purple one kidnapped me, she forgot i could shape shift, said something about testing my resilience. It sounded like she wanted to dissect me.” I said, flippantly..
“*PURPLE* kidnapped you? I knew she was slightly eccentric with her studies but this is way to far!” Tia said, apparently this Purple, If thats even her real name, had mental problems… and was an element of harmony…
“So who is she anyway?” I asked, befuddled from Tia’s reaction.
“She’s my personal stude-“ As she said that someone who looked like a preposterously prissy pony ponce barged in.
“Aunty You must make time to see me! I am simply to important to ignore like the common rabble!”
Said this cunty looking pale fellow with blond hair and a blue bowtie… A BLUE BOWTIE!
“Well you interrupted my meeting with them… Fuck it. I challenge you to a duel of honour, stakes are that, If I win, you have your prince-hood revoked until I see fit.” I say, entertained and slightly insulted.
“Very well you filth.” He spat. “And if i win you are not allowed to ever be in my view.”
“Ok then! A duel it is! We have to shake to bind it though.” i say back
“HMPH! I do not shake with Commoners!” you could see him spitting.
“Omnus is a prince of Equestria, through saving our mother when she was pregnant with us.” Tia said, I had actually forgotten about my prince-hood, fond memories i had getting that.
———————————————————————————————————————————
I was out hunting in my forest, now known as the Everfree, I was sneaking through the bushes and checking the traps that i had laid, when I heard something crashing through the canopy above, sounding close by. I quickly changed direction and rushed through the bush as quietly as i could, while still moving fast.
I found myself on the edge of a clearing, a carriage with oil lamps on it broken, fire close by, two dead corpses in Ironbark armour hitched to the front. I decided to look in the carriage, which had turned on it’s side, and as i looked in I hoped that whoever was in there was alive.
There was! It was a lady, unconscious on her side, obviously pregnant, in the back seat. She had red hair and white fur, she was bleeding out of he side and hip. I tried to wait her up by whispering ‘ hey, wake up.’ but that obviously didn't work, so I grabbed he by the arms (Noticing wings on her back)and hoisted her on top of the carriage, until i was able to get up, I jumped down off the carriage and grabbed her form the top, carrying her bible style, I noticed bushes rushing and sprinted for the edge of the clearing that i had come from. I barely made if before i saw wooden heads poking out and sniffing the clearing.
About an hour later I had made it home to my shack, and gotten a pot of water on to boil. I had washed her wounds as well as i could… which meant she was in her undergarments on my bed, however i had wrapped her wounds in bandages and gotten her under my blankets. So now it was just a matter of time before she woke up.
About five minutes later, whenI had a pot of tea ready and was about to pour it into some cups I heard her groan, I quickly turned around, putting down the tea, and went over to her.
“Can you hear me?” i asked. Unsure about her state of consciousness.
She groaned again, blinking. “W-Where am I?” she asked, sounding very afraid.
“Just relax, You are at my home, you crash landed in the forest and i brought you here.
“Which forest? How are my guards? Who are you?” she asked in rapid succession, seeming to have a slight panic attack.
I went and brought the tea over, setting the tray down and pouring her a cup.
“I will answer your questions in order. One, we are in the Everfree. Two, I’m afraid your guards died on impact. Three, My name in Omnus Compositae.” I said, trying to sound as calming as possible… It appears it didn’t work, as she appeared to panic a bit more. So i said “ Don’t worry, I am the Apex Predator of this forest, nothing will come for you and yours.” It actually appeared to work a bit.
“Well thank you for you hospitality but i really must be going.” she said, trying to get up. I gently pushed her back down saying
“You aren’t leaving until those wounds heal, you got hit in the hip so if the stitches come undone you might damage your child.” I said bluntly… Hey I lived in a forest cut of from civilisation for thirty years, I don’t really talk to anyone that often, just be glad I don’t rhyme every sentence. Could you imagine that! I mean what if i wanted some orange juice? ‘Could i please have some juice of O, i thank you, bartender Moe.’
I gently pushed her down, laying he back on the bed. “You need your rest to let them heal, before you ask I will sleep on the floor, after all you need the bed more than I do.”
“Thank you.” she said smiling slightly.
“It is no problem, May i ask your name?”
“Faust, my name is Faust.”
I nursed her back to health for a couple weeks, during which we just talked about anything really, philosophy, current event, how i got here (Still don’t know how) and other things. I ended up getting her to talk about her family and found out she was having twins. Congratulating her I asked what their name were and what gender they were.
She said and I quote. “Well we don’t really have any names for them yet, but it appears they like the heavenly bodies, like the sun and moon. They are both girls as well.”
“Well why don’t you name them Celestia and Luna then? They are both pretty names and seem fitting if they like the heavenly bodies.” I asked.
“Hmm, i may just do that.” She said smiling.
Eventually we were found by a group of guard… who proceeded to arrest me for ‘kidnapping their queen’. I was taken to the Everfree castle (which was actually Where Ponyville is), along with Faust, who was now, i estimated, about a week from bursting.
I was interrogated then released when Faust had a talk with her husband.
He made me a prince, which i fucking hated. And so i stayed in the castle, living the life of royalty and babysitting whenever Faust and Omnia (Her husband) where away, which was often, so i became Celestia and Luna’s best friend, and that remained throughout the years, when Omnia died, and Faust ‘Disappeared’, when Discord started his Chaotic Reign, When the sister beat him…i had tried to talk to luna about 50 years after Tirek, she started shutting me out and eventually went full 'Everyone will love me!' Even when we already did forcing me to hold her down and Celestia to use the elements on her.
About 100 years after that i left, going back to my forest and starting the weekly tea thing with Faust.
