Chapters Author's Note
Hello all! This is another one of my passion projects, mainly because I've been writing grim dark mostly non stop for a long time. Not that I'm going to stop writing them since I started this, I most certainly am. I just wanted to give romance and porn a chance and see if I'm any good at it. While I do intend for sex scenes and sexual stuff, it will still be a romance story.
This chapter is for character building and stuff, with a rather steamy scene near the end. The second chapter won't really have much in terms of sexual content, but the third one will be the first to have an actual sexual act in it. If that bothers you that I didn't start the story off with straight up sex, that's completely fine, everyone has their preferences. But I prefer there to be buildup, it makes it more satisfying in my opinion.
And as a warning, this is more or less another one of my passion projects. So going into this, you should accept the possibility that I may go on hiatus for a while with it, or just straight up stop writing it. There is only one series I am currently working on that I am going to finish, and these stories just serve as a break from it a lot of the time. And a chance to see what I can do.
Tell me what you think of the story, if you spot any issues like grammar or anything, and thanks for reading!
Chapter One: Blue Eyes.
Normal, average, nothing special.
All adjectives Jason Pitler has used to describe himself, though he very rarely says them out loud.
He has spent his entire life just being average, average grades, average looks, average everything. It’s just the way he’s lived his life, never felt a desire for anything more. His friends, if they can even be called that, always thought he was weird and a loner. Which was probably true, but that didn’t bother him either.
Eventually, after years of working part time for minimum wage, he saved up enough money to move. It isn’t that he hated where he lived before or anything, he felt neutral about it. He just wanted somewhere...new, where nobody knew him and he truly felt free, free to make decisions about anything he wanted to. To talk to whoever he wanted, befriend whoever he wanted, whatever he felt like.
However, he doubted that he’d actually befriend anyone, he just liked the option.
Besides, it wasn’t like he was leaving anyone or anything behind. He talked to people at school occasionally, sure. But he never had any actual friends he was close to, nor did he ever date anyone due to lack of interest in a relationship. He didn’t know his parents, didn’t have any siblings he knew of, and didn’t really have anyone other than his previous landlord that actually cared about him.
But, since he was eighteen years old, he still had to go to school. He hadn’t heard anything about Canterlot High yet, then again, he didn’t really have anyone he talked to. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t anxious, especially since he was transferring in the middle of the year. That was a lot of unwanted attention, but luckily it's really easy to just blend in and seem like anyone else after people stop paying attention to you.
Jason usually liked to walk whenever he was feeling nervous or anxious about anything, it was always very calming and allowed him to think. He preferred to do so at night if he could, the darkness and background noise of the night made everything seem peaceful. The only problem was since this was a new town, he didn’t really know the layout very well. He knew his own block decently, but that was about it. He walked around his own block for an hour or two, before feeling comfortable enough to move to the next block, and that’s just how he’s been doing his walk tonight.
Jason stopped walking where he was, in the middle of a sidewalk with a street light a foot or two in front of him. He stopped paying attention to what time it was, could’ve been eight pm, could have been three in the morning, he really had no idea. The only things he had on him were his outdated phone, his wallet, and his keys to his car and apartment.
He looked to his right, seeing his reflection in the glass window of a nearby shop, the light coming from the streetlight allowing him to see it. He had brown, wavy hair that was a bit curly. He never tried to style it, mostly because he never had a reason to change his appearance. He had dark blue eyes, very similar to the color of sapphires. His face was normal for a guy, his jawline was a bit sharp, his nose was normal and his cheeks aren't particularly fat or anything. The only thing that bothered him was that his facial hair usually grew back annoyingly quickly, giving him a bit of stubble on his face, grown in enough to show what his facial hair would look like if he didn’t shave.
Right now, he was wearing a bright white t-shirt with dark blue jeans, normal light blue and white laced shoes on his feet. The only thing he’d say was different about his outfit would be his wallet, it had a hole in it that a chain went through, the end of the chain was a hook that attached to his belt. He didn’t get it because he thought it was ‘cool’, he got it because he really couldn’t afford to lose his wallet, and he could be very forgetful.
He had a normal body type, not too skinny, but not really chubby either. That was something he could attribute to his metabolism, since he never worked out in his life. Height was what he supposed was around the normal for his age and gender, roughly five eleven when he last checked.
*Very...normal looking, good. I should wear something like this to school tomorrow.*
Jason took his eyes off his reflection, pulling his IPhone six out of his pocket to check the time.
*Twelve, not as late as I was worried it would be. I could be out longer if I wanted to, I don’t need more than a few hours of sleep since I don’t really expend a lot of energy. I should head back anyway, not really sure how tomorrow’s going to go.*
He put his phone back in his pocket, heading back to his home. He was content to just walk back to his apartment, feeling like he confidently knew his way back.
Until he saw something out of the corner of his eye that caught his interest.
As soon as he walked past an alleyway between buildings, he could have sworn he saw a human figure in there. He stopped for a second, contemplating whether he should just keep walking, he didn’t like involving himself in other people’s business.
*What if it’s someone in there that’s injured or something? I’m antisocial, not uncaring. *
Jason let out a small sigh as he slowly backed up, standing back in front of the alleyway and peering inside. He didn’t notice before that this alleyway had lighting, an overhead lamp attached to the wall was illuminating the alleyway with a light blue color, allowing Jason to see what it was he saw.
It was a girl.
She didn’t look old, maybe seventeen or eighteen, she likely even went to the same school he was going to. She sat in the fetal position with her back against the wall beside a large dumpster, it'd be hard to see if he hadn’t just barely noticed her. She had long, straight pink hair, covering the majority of her face and going down to her shin. Her skin was the same color as her hair, but was a much brighter tone. It kind of reminded him of Samara from The Ring movies, but...pink.
He could barely see her eyes, which seemed to be a light blue, though it was hard to tell through her hair. She had a half-lidded look on her face, she seemed to be staring at a spot on the wall across from her, in an almost catatonic state as she was evidently in deep thought, she hadn’t even noticed him yet.
She wasn’t wearing a lot of clothes, a pair of sweatpants that seemed almost too big for her to wear and was barely on. What she was wearing, from what he could tell, looked like pink furry slippers, like the kind someone would sleep in. She was also wearing a tight, white t-shirt, leaving very little to the imagination. He could easily see her curves, and she had a body that was very...healthy for a girl her age. He could also see her somewhat large bust, he was sure if he really looked, he could probably see her bra if he wanted.
*Not that I’m interested in that, it’s just...an observation.*
She looked perfectly fine, physically, at least. It was difficult to read the expression on her face, but nobody that felt fine would be sitting in the fetal position past midnight between two buildings. He wasn’t the best at being able to tell what other people are feeling, but he got the impression she was...distraught.
*Should I….try to help her? I’m not sure what I could even do, but just leaving her here doesn’t seem like a good idea either.*
If he just left her here, then someone else might see her and...take advantage of the situation. He didn’t know what kind of town this place was or what kind of things went on here after the sun went down, if he just left now, it would likely always be on his conscious and he’d always wonder what happened.
*I hate being an over thinker. * Jason thought to himself as he walked in the alleyway, standing just a little bit beside her.
She still hadn’t noticed him, whether that was because she was ignoring him, or was just that deep into thought, he couldn’t tell.
“Hi.” Jason said in a voice just barely loud enough to hear, giving a silent nervous gulp after.
The girl’s eyes widened as he spoke, as if being snapped out of her trance. She shifted her gaze from the wall to Jason, her stare seeming to pierce into his soul. She focused on his face, before going downward looking at his body, almost like she was checking him out.
“Hello.” She said despondently, her eyes shooting back up to his face, looking at him almost curiously. “You know, most people don’t approach a strange girl sitting in an alleyway to say hi.”
Jason nervously put his hands in his pockets, noticing the sardonic tone in her voice. “Yeah, well. Most people don’t sit in an alleyway by themselves past midnight, either.”
She stared at him for a few seconds, before the corners of her lips curved into a smirk. She let out a chuckle as she lowered her legs, laying them flat on the ground with her arms at her sides.
“I guess you’re right, maybe we’re both just some weirdos.”
Jason looked at her for a few seconds, unsure of exactly how to respond, he was always terrible at idle conversation.
“Look, I’m...really bad at small talk, so I’ll just get to the point. Are you okay?”
The smile on her face lowered back to a frown, her gaze turning from him back to the wall. She straightened her back and put her head against the wall, she brought her left hand up to her face and moved her hair behind her ears, revealing more of her face.
Despite the darkened expression on her face, there was a certain..brightness to her. Her baby blue eyes worked perfectly with the color of her hair and skin, not a single blemish or abnormality at all.
*She’s...really pretty, actually. *
“That’s...a really complicated question to answer.” She mumbled, looking over at Jason and using her left hand to pat the empty spot beside her, signaling him to sit beside her. “If we’re going to talk, come sit down with me, it makes me uncomfortable if I’m the only one sitting down. Besides, you clearly don’t have anything better to do if you’re out talking to some strange girl in an alleyway past midnight.”
Jason just stared at her for a few moments, wondering whether or not she was being serious. When it was clear she was, he realized he was already in too deep and might as well indulge her.
Jason walked forward and sat down beside her, in almost the exact same position she was.
“So, what’s your name, stranger?” She said as she tried to make her voice deeper, like she was mocking someone.
“Um...My name’s Jason. What’s yours?”
Her eyes widened in what looked like surprise, like she hadn’t expected him to ask her that.
“My name….” She said more to herself than Jason, her mouth opened and closed a few times, trying to figure out what she should say. But every time it seemed like she knew what she was going to say, she hesitated. “My name...is Diane. You can call me Diane.”
She extended her right hand to him, as a way to greet him. She had a slight smile on her face like she was trying to seem happy, but it was clear she was straining. He looked down at her extended hand, trying to figure out who this girl was.
*What kind of person hesitates in giving their own name?*
Slowly, he shook her hand, noticing that while it was soft, she still had a firm grip. It was a bit scary, actually.
“It's...nice to meet you, Diane.” Jason said with a bit of a stutter.
“Likewise.” She responded, before pulling her hand away and sitting in the same position as before. Her arms lying to her sides and her strained smile disappearing.
There was now an awkward silence between the two that seemed to last forever, Jason didn't know what to say and Diane seemed to be waiting for him to say something.
*This is why I hate talking to people, I gotta say something.*
“So...y-you come here often?” He asked with another nervous gulp, this one more audible than the last one.
Diane looked at Jason with raised eyebrows for a second, before giving out a high pitched snort and giggling.
“Wow, you really are terrible at small talk.” She said as she brought her hand to her face, trying to get her hair to stay behind her ears by tucking them. “I do, actually. I come here every other night, it's kind of like my secret getaway spot. Been doing it for a couple months or so, this is the first time someone else has come here though.”
He felt a bit embarrassed at her finding his lack of communications skills, but at the same time, it was the first time he’d ever actually made a girl laugh. He could count the amount of times he’s talked to a girl on his hands, even less of those are times girls talked to him first out actually wanting to rather than needing to.
Jason looked around the alleyway for a moment, noticing that it wasn’t as dirty as he thought it was. Other than the dumpster and a backdoor to the shop they were sitting against, there wasn’t really anything here, much better than most alleyways he saw in his old town.
“It's not the worst place I suppose, though I’m not an expert or anything. What are you trying to get away from?”
He could see her tense up when he asked that, and hear the loud, frustrated sigh she let out as she looked down at her hands idly.
“Nothing, everything. I don’t know. I just get...really really fucking overwhelmed sometimes. With school, friends, clubs, and a job, I barely have any free time. And even on the chance that I get to be home, my sisters are either being too caring, or not caring enough. I love them to death, but sometimes I just need to be alone!”
Diane let out a groan as she clenched her fist, almost like she was mad at her for being mad. Then she closed her eyes and inhaled deeply through her nose, trying to calm herself down.
“Whenever I need a break, I just sneak out for a bit and come here. After a few hours, I usually come back with none of them knowing. Being alone here helps me think and calm down, it's my only escape. You wouldn’t understand.”
He looked at her with something he wasn’t sure he’d felt for anyone else before: understanding.
“No, I totally get it. That’s what I was out for, actually. Whenever I get stressed or nervous or whatever about something, I usually go out for walks at night. It helps me think and is usually very soothing to me, it's my only real escape.” Jason looked up into the night sky as he spoke, he found it a lot easier to talk with someone if he isn’t actually making eye contact with them.
“Tonight I was really worried because tomorrow is my first day at school, and as you can tell, I’m not exactly a people person.”
Something he said seemed to peak her interested, she turned her head to face him, a bit of curiosity in her eyes.
“Canterlot High?”
Jason looked back down at her, looking at the spot between her eyes as he talked to her. This makes it seem like he’s making eye contact with her when he’s actually not, a little trick he learned from years of avoiding eye contact.
“There isn’t another high school around here, as far as I’m aware.”
She rolled her eyes, seemingly annoyed at something.
“Well, there’s Crystal Prep. That place is full of aristocratic arrogant assholes who only care about themselves, if it wasn't for the fact that I know there are some good people there, I swear I’d-” Diane caught herself when she noticed Jason staring, a shocked expression on his face at how quickly she got that angry.
She awkwardly brought her hand up to her mouth and coughed in it, “Sorry about that, I went on a bit of a tangent there.” Diane said as she lowered her hand, seeming to regain her composure. “Anyway, I go to Canterlot High. It's a really great and unique place, even a loner like you would love it. There’s just...a lot of history and problems between them and Crystal Prep, it's not something you have to worry about, it’s mostly over.”
*Ok, that was a bit weird. *
Jason relaxed a bit, admittedly curious about what happened between the schools, but not enough to stick his nose in it.
“So, will I see you there tomorrow then? I’d like to have someone show me around at least, I’m kind of terrible at navigating.”
He barely noticed it, but her composure faltered for a second. And there was a look of...sadness in her eyes, like the way she looked before.
“I doubt it, I usually stay pretty low profile and keep to myself at school, I know how to not get noticed if I don’t want to be. There will be someone who will help you tomorrow though, she’s really good at helping new students get adjusted, and just about everything else.”
There was some very clear hostility in her tone as she spoke, being directed at whoever she was talking about. But before Jason could ask about it, she was already back to normal.
“That also explains why I didn’t recognize you, since I know almost everyone in this town. What made you decide to move here?”
*She seems to have a habit of directing the conversation the way she wants it to go, I should probably take that as a red flag, but I don’t know enough about girls to say whether that’s normal for them to do or not.*
“Well,” Jason shifted around a bit, pulling his hands out of his pockets and trying to get more comfortable, which was hard to do with how cold and hard the ground was. “I grew up in an orphanage, so I didn’t know my parents. I don’t have any siblings that I know of, and due to my atrocious social skills and lack of desire to be social, I’ve never had any close friends. I wanted to go somewhere where no one knew me, a fresh start. This was the closest and cheapest place, so this is where I ended up.”
Diane frowned as a sullen look came over her face, something in her eyes that he hasn’t seen directed at him since his days at the orphanage: pity.
“Jason, that sounds...really lonely, and sad. I’m sorry.” She said with compassion in her voice, more sincere than almost anyone’s ever said to him.
*I...don’t know how to respond to this, no one’s ever apologized to me before like this. I’m not sure whether to feel sad or happy.*
“ No, it wasn’t that bad, really. I felt really lonely for a while when I was younger, but eventually I got used to it and it just doesn’t bother me.” He noticed that somewhere along the conversation, Diane had moved closer to him. But, unlike with other people, this isn't making him uncomfortable, he wasn’t sure why. “Honestly, I think it fits me. Being alone and not being close with anyone is what I’ve always known, and it's the choice I’ve continued to make.”
Diane hid her face behind her hair, which just didn’t want to stay behind her ears, turning her head to the right and seeming to be looking at the wall again, bringing her arms to her chest and crossing them.
“No one deserves to be lonely, Jason. And no one deserves to feel like it's ok to be lonely and to never have anyone close to them. I can’t even imagine who or where I’d be without my sisters or my friends, they’re everything to me.”
For a second, he thought he heard her sniffle, the idea of making her upset like that made his heart drop. But when she looked at her, she didn’t look that sad anymore. If anything, she just looked angry. He could tell her jaw was tightened and that she was probably scowling.
*Great, you haven’t even been in this town for a day yet and you already pissed off the first person you met. Smooth, Jason, real smooth.*
He felt disappointed and mad at himself, letting out a silent sigh as he stood up.
“I clearly made you upset, I’m sorry. I...should just go.”
Jason put his hands back in his pockets, beginning to walk out of the alleyway.
“No, Jason, please wait.” He heard Diane’s voice, more quiet and depressed than he thought she was capable of. He also felt her hand grab his forearm, an electric shock went through his body as he felt her warm, soft hand touch him. “I’m not mad at you, I promise. Just...don’t leave, I like talking with you.”
Jason looked down at her, both of her eyes looking up at him through her hair. He saw something in her eyes he recognized instantly, he’d recognize it anywhere: loneliness.
*Not even you can say no to that, she’s giving you a second chance, don’t fuck it up.*
Jason sat back down in the spot he was before, feeling Diane’s hand retract. Strangely, he missed the feeling that came with that.
“I know there’s a lot of tragedy and sadness in the world, it just pisses me off that there are some people that were just so fucked at birth. I may not know you that well, but you aren’t a bad guy, Jason. You have no idea what you’re missing out on, and it makes me...disheartened.”
She lowered her arms to her sides again, putting her hair behind her ears for the third time before facing Jason again.
“I’m so-”
“If you say you’re sorry, I might hurt you, and not in a way you’d like.” She said in a threatening tone, glaring hard enough to kill someone if thoughts could kill.
“I...I can’t help it, it's just my first response since I usually assume it's my fault since I can’t communicate with people.”
“Believe me, I get it. I have a friend just like that, she was bullied for a good portion of her life and she’s extremely shy.” Diane’s face relaxed as she spoke, a small smile was even rising as she talked about this person, she must think fondly of them. “She apologizes for basically everything, I try really hard to get her out of her shell. But that many years of bullying has a lasting impact on someone that’s hard to deal with, I just wish there was more I could do to help her, and you.”
*She seems to care a lot about her friends, I’m getting a lot of mixed signals from her.*
Jason reached into his pocket to check his phone, looking at the time and seeing that it was almost one thirty.
“We...probably should be leaving soon, it’s almost two in the morning and it's a school night. Do you...want me to walk you home to make sure you get there safe?”
He was expecting a lot of responses to that, but a giggle wasn’t one of them. And yet, when he heard her giggle like that, he felt something...warm inside of him. It made him feel weird, he wasn’t sure how to explain it. Was this the ‘butterflies in your stomach’ feeling he had heard about?
*She’s...kind of cute, actually. I haven’t met a lot of people, but she might be the most interesting person I’ve ever met.
“No, silly billy, I don’t need you to escort me back. This is a really small town, everyone knows each other and the majority of people here are really nice. Nothing like that happens here, it just doesn’t. Thank you though, you’re sweet. I bet the girls were all over you at your old school, girls love nice guys.”
“Nah, not really. Girls never seemed to have an interest in me, but that’s probably because I never really showed an interest in anyone else. I didn’t have a first crush, hell, I’ve never even had my first kiss.”
He heard Diane let out a slight gasp of shock, genuinely surprised at what he said. “Are you serious? Not even your first kiss?”
He only blinked in response, his eyebrows furrowed slightly in confusion. “Yes. Why, is that weird?
She had a baffled expression on her face, her mouth opened and closed for a second, speechless on how to respond.
“Well, not exactly weird per se. I’ve never met someone so...innocent, I guess.”
Suddenly, her eyes focused on something, like she just noticed something about Jason’s face.
*Why is she staring at me? Was it something I said?*
Jason was getting noticeably nervous, he didn’t like people paying attention to him in general, getting stared at made him...vexatious to put it lightly.
“Uhhh...Diane? Why are you-”
Before he could say anything else, she got closer to him. Then she started climbing on top of him, and by climbing, he meant straddling.
*What is she doing? What is she doing?! WHAT IS SHE DOING?! *
With Jason’s back against the wall and her on top of him, mixed with him being shocked, afraid, and flustered all at the same time, he couldn’t really do anything to stop her. Without a single word, she placed herself in his lap. Her legs were wrapped around his torso, with her crotch pressed against his, something he wasn’t in the right state of mind to tell if she did intentionally, the only things separating them were the layers of clothing they were wearing. She placed her left hand on his chest, right where his heart would be. Her right hand was touching the side of his face, as gentle as she was soft. Her face was inches in front of his, close enough to where avoiding eye contact was almost impossible.
Jason was completely overwhelmed at the moment, his minding having a total meltdown. He could feel her womanhood through her baggy sweatpants, the feeling of intense heat as their genitals made contact was more than he could handle. The feeling of her incredibly soft hand on his chest, and her other hand caressing his face like a baby, filled his entire body with heat. He felt warm, really really warm everywhere, especially in his face, which he was sure was beet red right now. His arms were still laying on the ground to his sides, he felt like he was unable to even try to move them at the moment.
His heart was beating like a drum it was so loud, he could hear and feel every beat like it was trying to jump out of his throat, he was sure she could too. His breathing was erratic and his mouth was dry, he was also sweating almost everywhere. He looked down to try to avoid eye contact with her, which only made things worse.
If her shirt didn’t cover much before, it covered almost nothing now. He could see all the way down her shirt, which included the entirety of her breast. He was sure they were at least a D cup, maybe even bigger than that. Like the rest of her body, they seemed to be completely flawless. No blemishes, stretch marks, or anything like that. The only part he couldn’t see were the actual nipples, and those were being protected by a midnight black bra.
He couldn’t help but wonder if her underwear matched.
“Blue.”
His eyes immediately went back up to her face, which looked the same as it did before, like she hadn’t even noticed. Her voice was like a whisper, if she hadn’t been so close to him, he likely wouldn’t have heard it. Or maybe that was because his heartbeat was so loud.
“W-what?”
She gave a light chuckle, finding what he said both cute and funny.
“Your eyes, not bright green, not dark purple. They’re blue. A different shade than mine, but still blue. That’s not something I see very often. A surprising amount of green, more purples than you’d think. But blue? Really not that often, especially not a dark blue like yours. When I look into them, they remind me of the ocean. So dark and so deep, I could almost get lost in them.”
Jason was left completely speechless, his mouth slightly agape as he tried to think of something to say, but nothing came.
“You know,” A sultry expression came over Diane, her lips curved into a sly smile as her eyelids half closed. “Most guys in your position would have at least tried to put their hands on me by now, but you haven’t. Then again,”
Diane moved her face closer to Jason’s, their noses were almost touching. She was so close he could hear her breathing, while his were erratic and loud, hers was very calm and quiet. It was...very soothing, actually. They were staring directly into each other's eyes, there was no way for him to break it other than closing his eyes. But, likely because he was already feeling so many other things, he wasn’t feeling that anxiety and nervousness that he usually had with eye contact.
“You aren’t like other guys. And I really like that.”
He could feel her hot breath on his face and neck, sending goosebumps all over his body. He was very tempted to touch her, he could only imagine how soft the rest of her body was if her hands were this soft.
She moved her face even closer to his, bending her head to the left slightly so their noses didn’t touch. Their lips were now just an inch or two away from touching, now breathing directly on each other's faces. He barely even felt her right hand come off of his face, moving down to his chest as she placed it beside her other hand. The entire time, she never broke eye contact, not even once.
He could tell there was something stopping her from going any further, like she was waiting for something.
“If I were to kiss you right here and now, taking your first kiss, would it bother you?”
There was something labored about the way she spoke, he could feel her breathe getting hotter and faster along with her heartbeat. He was just guessing, but it seemed like she wanted this. But instead of just doing it, she was asking for his permission.
He couldn’t quite place it, but the fact that she was asking for that made him...happy.
“I-i….wouldn’t mind.”
That was all the confirmation she needed, without another word and a close of her eyes, and what felt like more anticipation than he could handle, their lips connected and they kissed. As soon as they did, he felt like some kind of connection had been made, like that kiss linked them together. There was so much passion and intimacy in it, just raw emotion. He didn’t move his lips, he had never kissed before and wouldn’t know what to do, he was too afraid of ruining it. But she didn’t seem to mind taking the lead, in fact, it felt like there was some desperation coming from her. Whether it was desperation for more, or something else he couldn’t tell.
He couldn’t say this for certain, but she seemed experienced. She wasn’t using tongue or anything, it was entirely a closed mouth kiss, but she was doing everything with it that she could. And yet she was still being so gentle, clearly restraining herself for him out of concern.
Just as soon as it began, it ended. She suddenly pulled back, a sound Jason could only describe as a mixture of squishing and popping happened as their lips parted. She opened her eyes, and he could still see the want in her eyes as she looked at him. Her cheeks were a bright red and her breathing erratic, it was clear she wasn’t satisfied.
*So why did she stop? *
“I’m sorry Jason, but we can’t go any further than this. At least, not tonight. I think you’re sweet, and cute, and I think we could be really good friends despite how bad you think you are at communicating. But,” Diane bit the corner of her lip, like she was stopping herself from speaking before thinking about what she was going to say.
“Would you...like to be Frenefits with me?” She asked hesitantly, her face similar to a little girl asking for a toy she really wanted.
Jason was starting to come down from his high, his heart beating was finally starting to slow down and he was getting his breathing under control. It’s just the heat in his face and the rest of his body that wouldn’t go away, but he doubted that would happen as long as they stayed in the position they were in.
“F-Frenefits?” Jason stuttered out, feeling immense confusion at both the situation and the word he was trying to pronounce.
“Yeah, friends with benefits, you know? Or do you not know what that is?” Diane asked innocently, most of the desire and lust she had just a few moments ago seeming to quickly vanish.
*What is with this girl? She either has more self control than anyone I’ve ever known, or she can become another person at the snap of a finger. I’m not sure which one concerns me more.*
“No, of course I know what friends with benefits are, I’ve seen the movie. I’m just confused, because…” Jason was trying his best to try to avoid moving around, he didn’t want to push them any closer than they already were. At this point he was fully erect, all he could do was hope she didn’t notice. “Well, you kind of just met me. And we don’t really know each other, like at all.”
“That’s true, but, I already like you more than some guys I’ve known for years.” She moved her face closer to his again, but this time it didn’t feel sexual. It felt more...friendly, like she just liked being that close to him. “I felt comfortable around you pretty quickly, which isn’t normal for me. I’m not sure how to explain it, but I just feel...connected to you, somehow. Besides,”
Diane’s expression darkened as she frowned, “I...want to help you. You came here for a fresh start, and I think that was a good idea. But take it from me, nobody can change without some kind of experience or people to help them. I can help you be more social and make connections, and if you say yes, I can help with more than just that. But even if you say no, I still want to be your friend.”
*She seems so genuine and cares about me even though we just met, which could be a good thing or a bad thing. But if I say no, how could she expect things to not be awkward after that ?*
Diane looked at Jason almost expectantly, not moving an inch of her body, which he appreciated for a different reason.
“Diane..I-”
Before Jason could say anything, she put her finger to his lips to shush him, shaking her head back and forth in a disapproving manner.
“Don’t give me your answer, not right now at least. You’re horny, and nobody makes good decisions when they’re horny.” She said bluntly as she pulled her finger away from his lips, before lowering her gaze to his lower torso. “Though, it seems one part of your body is very sure about what it wants.”
It was very obvious what she was talking about, he was just really hoping she wouldn’t have noticed it. For the third time that night, Jason nervously gulped, an embarrassed expression on his face as he tried to think of what to say.
“I’m so-”
“Boop!”
Before he could apologize, Diane poked him on the nose, like when you’d try to get a dog to stop doing something. It didn’t really hurt, but it was really...unnerving.
“Stop apologizing, that’s the first thing we’re going to work on.” She said sternly as she waved her finger back and forth, “Besides, you shouldn’t apologize for that, you don’t really have any control over it. And I fully expected it, if you hadn’t gotten hard, I would have just assumed you were gay and this conversation would have gone a completely different way. Anyway, I’ll get off of you now.”
Diane unhooked her legs from his lower torso, putting her feet on the ground and standing up, moving a few inches away from him.
“I know you said you were anxious about tomorrow, but I promise you, you really shouldn’t be. Everyone in Canterlot High is really open and accepting, and you might find that you and I are the least weird with a lot of the people there. We just got done with midterms too, so you transferred in at a good time. Tomorrow will be an easy peazy day for you, which is why I want you to spend tomorrow thinking about what I asked you.”
Jason was trying really hard to keep his eyes on her face, and not lowering his gaze to look at her breast. Or to try to look at her lower area, which he was sure the sweatpants were sagging enough to where he could probably see her panties.
Luckily for him, even though he was fully erect, jeans do a really good job of hiding those.
“I want you to also know that, no matter what impression you have of me, this isn’t...typical of me. I’m not a slut, I don’t sleep around or do stuff with just anyone. Neither is my offer, there are very few men that have been in my life I had any kind of relationship like that with. My last boyfriend was two years ago, and that…”
Diane’s entire body tensed up as she closed her eyes for a moment, she was seemingly remembering something painful.
“Didn’t end very well. After that I haven’t been with anyone in any kind of way, for reasons I don’t want to go into. I haven’t actually kissed anyone since then either, It’s just...been hard for me to trust anyone and be comfortable with anyone since then. What I’m trying to say is,”
Diane opened her eyes as she crouched down, getting to eye level with Jason and having a very serious expression on her face.
“I want the friends part just as much as the benefits part, probably a lot more. That’s why I feel like I need to give you the day to think about this, it's important to me that you want me, not just want to get laid. Because if that’s all you want, I will end it before it even starts. Do you understand?”
Jason contemplated what she was saying, trying to make sense of it the best way he could while his body cooled down.
*So, let me get this straight; She wants to be my friend and try to help me be more social, but she also wants to do sexual things with me, but only if I want to do sexual stuff with her? It's official, this is the strangest night of my life. *
“Yeah, I think I get it. I appreciate you giving me time to think about it, I don’t do well with pressure, or decisions in general, honestly.”
“Good!” She said as she beamed a smile at him, this one didn’t seem strained at all. “My house is only a block away from here, so I should be able to get back in time and get enough sleep. You know you’re way back to your house, right?”
“Yeah, I do, I’m also only a block away.” Jason responded as he slowly got up, not even realizing that his legs were half asleep so he stumbled a little bit.
“That’s nice, maybe you can invite me over sometime. I really gotta get going, bye!” She said as she began walking out of the alleyway, going in the exact opposite direction of where his house would be.
Jason watched her walk off, still trying to sort out the last hour of events that just occurred.
*Should I have asked for her number? No, that would have seemed too pushy. Ugh, I have no idea what to do and no one to ask for advice.*
As he began walking back home, he found himself touching his lips a lot. When she kissed him, she had a certain taste about her he couldn’t quite pinpoint. Her lips were soft and warm, but there was still something to them. But now, he was sure he had it figured out.
She tasted like bubblegum.
Chapter Two: School Days, Part One.
*There aren’t a lot of things that make me more uncomfortable than eye contact. Waiting, getting a haircut from a barber and trying to figure out whether I should try to talk or not, stuff like that. But getting lectured? It was relatively low on that list.*
Celestia’s office was a bit bigger than he was expecting it to be, and had two more bookshelves in it than any he’s been in before, one of them with a mirror above it strangely enough. Her desk was probably wider than him if he were laying horizontally, made out of a light brown wood with three symbols on the front carved into it, the sun, the moon, and what he wasn’t entirely sure to be a mountain.
There were various things on her desk, but they were all things he’d expect to be on there, like a computer, intercom mic, and a few books. He also noticed the window in the right corner of the room with shades on it, a nightstand in front of it with a printer on top. Behind the desk was a large board with various writing on it, he guessed that was supposed to be a schedule of some sort. And a framed PhD on the wall in the left corner of the room, which, he hoped at least, belonged to the principal.
“...While clubs are highly recommended to both help socialize and they look good on your transcript, they aren’t a requirement. We also don’t…”
The principal was giving him a lecture about what the school expects from him, sitting in her chair behind her desk with her arms on the table. Clubs, school programs, all that stuff, he’d heard the same spiel before from his previous principal. He knew that it was either a requirement of principals to tell new students about them, or they just did it because getting more members would get them more funding, so he couldn’t really blame them. But he wasn’t interested in clubs or programs, and he didn’t get nagged on before for getting B’s and C’s, so there just wasn’t anything she was saying that was interesting to him.
He was interested in the principal, however, she looked like someone straight out of a cartoon. She was tall, freakishly tall. Well over six feet, maybe even closer to seven, it was really intimidating actually. She also had long, rainbow hair that almost looked like it was constantly moving on its own. It was kind of majestic, but also kind of freaky. Her skin was a stark white like a vampire, with dark heliotrope eyes to match.
*Diane mentioned she was in a club, I wonder what kind of club she’s in?*
Diane…
He had barely gotten any sleep last night when he finally got home, everything that happened with her kept playing again and again in his head like a broken record. Just the day before that he had never even held a girl's hand, and yet in just under an hour he had his first kiss and almost lost his virginity.
He was still trying to figure out what he said or did to make things go that way, and even now it was a struggle for him to not think about it.
*I wonder, is she thinking about me? I doubt it, I’m sure she has more important things on her mind.*
He was sure he looked like he didn’t get much sleep, he barely had time to change clothes. His shirt was basically the same one as last night, just black. A different but identical pair of jeans with his chain wallet hooked to it, and the same shoes he was wearing last night. The only thing new was the small backpack he was wearing with the bare essentials he would need.
“...That’s about everything, sorry I talked your ear off, it's just this is a big school and we like to give a lot of options for extracurricular activities. Do you have any questions?”
Jason snapped out of his trance, lowering his gaze from her entrancing hair. He put his hands in his pockets nervously, somehow he dealt with people in authority worse than with most people.
“N-no….I think I got it.” He said as he fidgeted around nervously, before remembering something he needed to ask. “I...do need help with something, if it isn’t too much trouble. I’d appreciate it if someone could show me where my classes are and stuff? I’m not that good at finding places myself.”
“Oh no, It’s no trouble at all! I was about to ask you if you needed help, actually.” Celestia said with a dismissive wave of her hand, moving her chair over to the intercom mic. “I have the perfect person for the job, she probably knows this place better than I do.”
She pressed the button on the mic to turn it on, lowering her mouth to the tip of the microphone.
*Great, another girl, my area of expertise.*
He had expected to be waiting there awkwardly for a few minutes while waiting for whoever was going to be showing up, feeling obligated to make idle conversation but being unable to. But not even a minute had passed before he heard the sound of the doorknob turning, before it swung open, just barely missing him.
“Hiya Principal Celestia? Whaddya need me for?”
He heard the voice before he saw her, since she spoke before she walked in, he was kind of curious how she got here so quickly. She sounded more like a little girl than a teenage girl in high school, but it wasn’t high pitched or anything to the point of annoyance.
“Pinkie, it's so nice to see you!” Celestia said cheerfully as she smiled at the person outside her door, “Come on in and meet our new student, he needs help learning where his classes and everything is, and I thought you’d be ecstatic to help!”
“REALLY!? I’d LOVE to help! Where is he?” She asked excitedly, walking into the room and shutting the door behind her.
As soon as he saw her, his eyes widened in surprise and recognition.
*Is that...Diane?*
The girl first turned her head to the right as she looked for him, then turned to her left, her bright baby blue eyes locking onto him as she beamed at him, practically the face of happiness.
“Hello!” She said giddily, extending her hands towards him as she did. “My name’s Pinkamena Pie, but you can call me Pinkie! What’s your name?”
She was the spitting image of Diane, she looked exactly like her, could have been twins for all he knew. Her skin was the exact same shade of pink, her eyes the same shade of light blue. He should know, he was close enough to her to recognize it anywhere. Her hair was also pink, but was...different somehow. Well, obviously it was different, it was in a completely different style. While Diane’s was straight and silky, this girl’s hair was bouncy, curly, and a complete mess, like cotton candy.
Though her hair was the same shade of pink, there was something about it that just seemed...brighter, he couldn’t quite explain it. And the smile on her face seemed so genuine and pure, it made him want to smile, and he rarely ever smiled if it wasn’t out of nervousness.
“Um...Hi. My name’s Jason Pitler, nice to meet you.” He said as he slowly extended his hand, shaking hers.
Her hand was soft and warm like Diane’s, or maybe that was just all girls? He wasn’t experienced enough to say, all he could base it off of is the one girl he’s touched. And this girls hand shake was more...relaxed somehow, it wasn’t as firm as Diane’s.
“Likewise!” She exclaimed as she shook his hand frivolously, before letting go just as quickly. “Hand over your schedule so I can see where your classes are! Oh I hope we have some together!”
“Oh, yeah sure.” Jason mumbled as he reached into his pocket, pulling out a folded piece of paper.
Faster than he could see, she swiped it out of his hand, unfolding it just as quickly. Her eyes moved quickly back and forth as she read the schedule, like she was looking for something. Jason was a bit baffled at how quickly and eager she did that, but he decided not to question it, and focused on something else.
Her outfit was very...colorful, was the best adjective he could think of. She was wearing a white blouse that had a purple heart in the center with a bright blue vest on top of it that went down a little past her shoulder, lighter blue bracelets on both of her wrists. She had a purple ribbon at the end of the blouse that was wrapped around her waist, below that was a bright purple skirt with balloons on it. She also had bright blue and white laced boots that almost went up to her nights, a small pink ribbon was at the top of each of them.
He glanced at her bust for a second, just to compare to Diane’s. It was hard to tell, but it was possible it was about her size.
*She looks like a character out of Candy Land or something.*
“Aww...We don’t have any classes together, that sucks.” She said in a defeated tone, her lips pursing together as pouted. She handed his schedule back to him, which he took, folded, and put back in his pocket. “I know where all these are though, we should have enough time for me to show you where they are, if we go right now !”
Suddenly, as her smile came back, she grabbed Jason by the hand. She ran out of the room, pulling Jason behind her, who looked very confused and nervous, not sure what to do.
“See ya Principal Celestia!” Pinkie said as she shut the door, leaving Celestia inside to watch them leave.
“Come on, let's walk and talk! That’s like, my second favorite thing to do!”
Pinkie Pie seemed to be very...exuberant, she had so much energy and was always smiling. It kind of threw him off a bit because she was so unlike anyone he had met before, he was trying to figure out whether that was a good thing or not. She also seemed intent on trying to have a conversation with him, but luckily it seemed she was good at holding a conversation.
*I just wish she’d let go of my hand, I’m starting to get sweaty.*
“ I mean, sure, but I’m terrible at small talk. Um...what’s your favorite thing to do then? If walking and talking is your second, I mean.”
“Well, baking of course! I love making sweets and pastries and stuff for my friends!” She said as she let go of his hand, much to his relief. Then she twirled around like a ballerina, getting in his face eagerly. “What’s your favorite thing to do?”
She stopped directly in front of him, stopping him in his tracks. She was face to face with him, invading his personal space like only one other person had before. He tried to look anywhere other than her face, his heart quickly beating as he felt himself rapidly being overwhelmed with nervousness and social anxiety.
The worst part was none of the students walking around the hallways were batting an eye, like it was completely normal of her.
“U-um….I-i like...watching...horror movies, I guess?”
After he said that, she backed away from him and put her hands on her hips. Her eyebrows furrowed as she looked at him in concern.
“You look upset, was it something I said?”
“No...It's just,” Jason closed his eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath as he tried to calm himself down. “I’m not a ‘people person’, is all. I get anxious really easily and people just kind of scare me sometimes, it isn’t your fault.” He said as he exhaled and opened his eyes, getting his breathing more or less under control.
“Ohh, I get ya. You should have just said so, I know a few people like you, it's no biggie.” She said as she turned around, “I’ll try to stay out of your bubble. Now let’s get back to walking and talking, your first class is just around the corner.”
Pinkie said as she began walking down the hallway, a bit slower than before for Jason. He followed behind her, keeping his gaze on her back and avoiding eye contact with the people in the hallways. Luckily it was breakfast, so there weren’t a lot of people around. But the few people who were around were stealing a glance at them, interested in the new student he had to guess.
Otherwise, the school looked good. Rows of green lockers with various rooms, it was certainly cleaner than his previous high school for sure.
“This is your first period, Mr. Doodle’s history class. He can be pretty cranky sometimes, but he’s really just a sweetheart.” She said as she stopped, turned to her left and pointed towards a classroom, before turning back to the right and walking again. “So, why’d you decide to move here? Your dad has to come here for work or something?”
“No, I grew up in an orphanage, I never knew my parents. I just wanted to come here for a fresh start, seemed like a decent place and I found an apartment that was relatively cheap.”
Pinkie stopped walking for a minute, something about her body language made her seem...sad.
“Oh...I’m….really sorry, I didn’t think that was a personal question. I don’t mean to be nosy, I just want to get to know people I’m friends with.” She glanced back at him for a moment, before looking forward and beginning to walk forward again.
*Friends, huh? She seems nice, but I don’t know if I can. She’s a bit too...touchy for my liking.*
“It's fine, you couldn’t have known. I do have something I want to ask you though, if you don’t mind.”
*It’s clear to me now this girl isn’t Diane, she’s too different. But at the same time, she looks too similar to her to not be related or something. Diane did mention that she had sisters, maybe this is one of them?*
“Shoot! I’m an open book.” Pinkie said as she turned a corner, having a bounce in her each step Jason didn’t notice before.
“Do you...have any sisters?” He asked awkwardly, turning the corner and noticing something at the end of the hallway. It was a double door entrance that led what looked like a library, but was much bigger than the one at his previous school. The shelves were taller, had a lot more books in them, and were all in the back of the room, there was even a second floor.
There were a few computers in the center of the room in a circle, and while there were a lot less computers than his last schools, they seemed more advanced and up to date. It looked more like a library than a computer lab, unlike his last highschool.
“Well yeah! I have three of them, some of my bestest friends in the world!” She said as she turned around to face Jason, the slight bit of sadness he noticed from earlier seeming completely gone.
“Do you have one that...looks like you and is named Diane?”
Pinkie’s eyebrows furrowed in thought for a moment as she hummed audibly, deeply thinking about what Jason asked her. Before suddenly relaxing her face and looking normal again.
There was an awkward silence as Pinkie just stared at him, before suddenly letting out a loud gasp and putting her hands up to her face dramatically.
“Do you think my dad has a secret family and is living a double life I don’t know about?!” She asked loud enough for everyone in the hallway to hear, but once again, no one seemed to bat an eye at her.
He was starting to realize this girl had a very...unique personality, and stuff like this happened so often that it was considered normal for her.
“Um...I don’t think so?” He mumbled, not really sure how else to respond.
“Good! Then I’d have to kick his butt for cheating on mom.” Pinkie turned around again and started walking forward, before suddenly skipping like a girl in elementary school playing hopscotch. “The school library’s just up ahead, let me show you it real quick.”
*So, not a sister. Then what, they just happen to look alike but aren’t related? Pinkie doesn’t seem the type to lie.*
“Sorry to ask, it’s just I met a girl last night that looks a lot like you.”
“Really? Just like me?” She asked as she stopped in front of the door to the library, turning towards him with a hand on her chin in a pondering look. “That’s strange, I know everyone in this town, and I can’t think of anyone that looks like me.
Before Jason had time to respond, Pinkie already seemed to lose interest as she grabbed Jason by the hand again and pulled him into the library.
“Oh well, no point in dwelling on it. Anyway, here’s the library!”
Jason felt himself getting anxious again, but a bit less this time. This is just the kind of person Pinkie was, she was very hands on, it wasn’t a big deal. He’d just….have to adjust. Physical contact didn’t bother him nearly as much as eye contact.
Pinkie glanced back at him, noticing she was holding his hand and quickly let go. “Sorry, habit.” She said with a guilty expression, before gesturing towards all the books in the library. “We’ve got tooooooonnnnsss of books, a little something for everyone. But I don’t really come here for the books.”
She walked over to the computers, Jason walked over with her, but honestly was more interested in the books. He liked reading a lot more than talking to people or using computers.
“The school spent a small fortune on these computers, but they are still monitoring them. So don’t try to look up anything…” Pinkie suddenly glared at Jason, her hands on her hips and a skeptical expression on her face like she suspected him of something. “Indecent.”
“I….don’t,” Jason felt her stare peering into him, similar to the way Diane stared at him the night prior, as he tried to look anywhere but her. “Look at porn, I’m not really like that.”
“Really?” Pinkie asked in a genuinely surprised tone, “My sister Limestone told me a lot of boys were horndogs and all they do is watch porn and spank the monkey.”
*Wow, she just...doesn’t have a filter, does she?”
Jason stood there uncomfortably, he had never even talked about this kind of stuff even with other guys. Certainly not with a girl, even if a girl as open as Pinkie was the one he was talking with.
But since last night, somehow he didn’t feel as anxious about it as he thought he would.
“I...probably don’t have any right to say this, but you don’t really have a lot of experience with guys, do you?”
Pinkie’s mouth opened for a second as it seemed she was speechless for a moment, “Um….oh no! Look at the time!” She suddenly said as she looked down at her wrist, before pulling a crayon out of her hair and drawing a watch on her wrist. Her tongue hanging out of the corner of her mouth and sweat beading down her face as she was putting visible effort in it, before putting the crayon back in her hair like nothing happened. “There’s...significantly less time than I thought we had, I have to show you your classes right now !”
For the third time in the past ten minutes, Pinkie grabbed Jason by the hand and began to lead him out of the library, almost faster than he could keep up with.
“Your next class is a bit far away, so we got to speed it up!”
Usually, Jason would be growing more anxious by the second. But each time Pinkie touched him, it made him less uncomfortable. Being around her, who seemed to just radiate joy, made it hard to be anything but happy.
*I’ve known her for all of ten minutes or so, but I have to admit. Pinkie is growing on me, she seems to have a way with people, even with someone like me.*
Chapter Two: School Days, Part Two.
The rest of the day went by faster than he thought it would, which was a change for him since he was usually so anxious about what might happen throughout the day that it made the day seem to go by slower. But after Pinkie showed him his classes and left, time just flew by.
The classes were easy to understand and most of the teachers did a good job of teaching, and, despite his fears, almost no one tried to talk to him to try to learn about the new student. Before he knew it, it was lunchtime.
“Come on, sit with us! You’ll love my friends, they’re the bestest people in the whole world!”
He probably should have expected this, but when lunch came around Pinkie was trying to introduce him to her friends. He was more than a bit worried, his interactions with her earlier that day was already enough to run his social battery dry. But it would have been more of a hassle to resist her than it would be to just give in, plus he felt like Pinkie was the kind of person who would get him to agree one way or another.
The cafeteria was about as big and looked like his last one, big tables and chairs, lines that lead in to the food and then out. The only thing different was the back of each chair had a sun symbol on the back, similar to the one on the front of Celestia’s desk.
“Pinkie...can you at least take it slow? I didn’t get breakfast today and I’d really like to eat.”
Pinkie had grabbed him by the arm as soon as he got his tray of food, a chocolate milk carton, slice of pizza, mashed potatoes and an apple. The food looked better than his last high schools too, so far everything about this school seemed to be an improvement. He just wished more people left him alone.
“Oh, yeah, sorry. I promise I’m working on giving you your personal space, I’m just not used to having to do it with anyone else.”
*Anyone else?”
“Hey Pinks, is that the new student I’ve heard about?”
A girl from the table Pinkie was trying to lead him to said, having a deeper voice than Pinkie, but still somewhat high pitched. She had rainbow hair like Celestia, but it was darker and less majestic. She had light blue skin and cerise eyes, she was wearing a white blouse with a blue vest like Pinkie, but a rainbow lighting bolt on the front instead. She had rainbow bracelets on both her wrists, a long pink and white skirt with black shorts underneath, with blue sneakers that were white laced.
*I try not to be judgmental, but she’s the most girly tomboy I’ve ever seen.*
“Yeppers! He’s not very social though, so be easy with him. “
Pinkie sat beside the multicolored tomboy, immediately chowing down on the various desserts and candies on her tray, leaving Jason to sit across from her. The person sitting beside him had red and yellow hair that went down to her back, having hair that was some mixture of straight and poofy, curling up near the end. She had bright cyan eyes and beautiful amber skin. She was also wearing a blouse, this one being a bright orange with a red and yellow sun on the front. Though instead of a vest, she was wearing a leather jacket. She had a bright purple skirt that went to her knees, being paired with small, black boots that had multiple straps on it.
*She somehow managed to combine school girl with bad girl in her outfit, this school is filled with some interesting people.*
“Hey there, I’m Sunset Shimmer. It’s nice to meet you.” She said as she smiled at him, giving him a brief smile before gesturing towards the girl sitting across from her.
“That’s Rainbow Dash,”
Rainbow Dash put her hands on the back of her head, setting her feet up on the table beside her already empty lunch tray. Except for an apple she seemed to be saving for later.
“Yo.”
“That’s Applejack,”
Applejack was a very southern looking person, she had light blonde hair tied in a pony tail that goes down to her back, wearing a tan cowboy hat on her head matched with emerald green eyes and three white freckles on each of her cheeks. She was wearing a light white button up shirt with the upper part of it being green, a brown belt with a red apple as the buckle went around her waist. Wearing a blue skirt with pockets on the front that went down to just above her knees, big cowboy boots with red apples on the front.
“Hey there, partner!” She said with a tip of her hat.
*Huh, didn’t think I’d find anyone of the country variety in this part of the country.*
“This is Fluttershy,”
The girl sitting beside Applejack looked different than the others, she seemed less...gregarious. She had long, straight pink hair, similar to Diane’s. Though it was a much brighter shade of pink, and curled up at the ends. She had opal eyes and grayish olive skin, and had surprisingly well cared for skin. She only wore a bright white t-shirt, a bright green shirt with various butterflies. She wore large green boots, but the bottom had a different design that resembled white high heels.
“H-hello…” She said barely louder than a whisper, hiding her face behind her hair as she twiddled her thumbs.
*She’s...really shy, maybe even worse than me. Is this the girl Diane was talking about?”
“And then there’s Rarity. There would be Twilight, but she didn’t come today.” Sunset said as she gestured to the girl beside her.
Rarity immediately made an impression on Jason that the others didn’t, she just seemed more...flamboyant. She had dark purple hair, the front part of it curving downward, the bottom part curving back and around to her side, it was clear she knew how to use a curling iron. She had stark white skin and bright azure eyes, he could also tell she heavily put on makeup.
She was wearing a light blue t-shirt, a purple belt with a blue buckle around her waist, the bottom of the belt is where the dark purple skirt with blue diamonds started. She was also wearing large, purple boots that went up to her knee, diamonds that looked like they were embedded into the top of the boot.
“Hello darling, splendid to meet you!”
*She’s the beauty queen of the school, every school has one. But she’s close friends with these girls specifically, what an interesting group of friends. I wouldn’t fit in at all.”
“Um...thanks for the warm welcome. I’m Jason Pitler, nice to meet you guys...I guess?” Jason said awkwardly with a nervous wave of his hand, glancing around the cafeteria for a moment.
Some part of him hoped he’d see Diane, sitting in the corner of the room somewhere eating by herself. They’d make brief eye contact, he’d look away from her out of habit, and look back to see she was waving for him to come sit by her.
But that didn’t happen, all there was were the chattering of conversation and dozens of faces he didn’t know.
*I wonder, is she watching me right now?”
“So, why'd ya move here?”
He heard Applejack ask him, causing him to turn his attention back to them. He immediately felt his stomach drop, seeing that the eyes of all the girls were now on him, even Fluttershy. He didn’t deal well with being the center of attention, but this wasn’t the first time he’s had to deal with something like this.
*Alright, calm down, you’re fine. Just...focus on talking to one at a time, pretend the others aren’t there.*
“ Oh, I just wanted a fresh start somewhere, is all.” He said as he looked down at his food, awkwardly picking up his pizza and taking a bite out of it.
“Well, you chose a pretty good place. People around here take their grades pretty seriously, especially me, so things get kind of hectic around test time and finals. I can help you with studying and stuff if you need it.” Sunset Shimmer offered, giving him a brief smile.
*These guys seem...really nice actually, at least to a stranger like me. Everyone I’ve met in this town has been really nice to me, it's a bit unnerving, honestly.*
“No, I think I can handle that, thanks. Though,” He mumbled as he laid his pizza down, opening the milk carton and taking a drink from it.
*They are girls, and you don’t really have anyone else to ask about it. Fuck it, what’s the worse that could happen?”
“ I’m...sorry if this comes off as rude, since we just met, but I don’t have anyone else to ask.” He said as he tugged on his shirt collar nervously, “I need advice, I’m having some...girl problems.”
“Is she hot?” Rainbow asked, seeming more interested in Jason now.
Jason immediately thought of when Diane was straddling him, his face turning beet red as he tried to look away from Rainbow Dash, quickly chowing down the food on his tray.
Strangely, Pinkie stopped eating mid bit, cupcake frosting still on her face. Her eyes shifting to Jason, not surprised, but more..curious, like she was expecting something.
“Rainbow Dash! That is not the first thing you ask about a lady.” Rarity shouted, seeming genuinely offended.
“What? I just wanted to know if she was hot or not.” Rainbow said nonchalantly, putting her feet back on the floor and taking a bite out of her apple.
“She….k-kind of looks like Pinkie, sort of.”
Rainbow turned her head to Pinkie for a moment, looking her up and down for a moment like she was checking her out, before turning back to Jason and taking another bite out of her apple.
“Pinkie’s hot, so is that a yes?”
Applejack smacked the back of Rainbow’s head, not to actually hurt her, just to discourage her.
“Get yer mind out of the gutter! Is that all ya think about? Just last week, ya were asking for our cup size to figure out who had the biggest nubbers!”
“Well yeah! How else was I supposed to know?” Rainbow said as she rubbed the back of her head, “I mean, I could have guessed it was Fluttershy, but I wanted to be sure. And even I was surprised by how much!”
Fluttershy’s face quickly got beet red as she made a high pitched squeal, somehow managing to hide further behind her hair.
“Not that big....”
He just barely heard her whisper. He also noticed that Pinkie was no longer looking at him, seeming to have lost interest and gone back to her food. But he couldn’t shake the eerie feeling that she was still intently listening.
“Don’t mind them, they just get…” Sunset Shimmer gestured towards them, trying to think of the right word to use. “Overzealous. Anyway, what kind of girl problems are you having?”
“It's...a bit complicated, I’ll try to explain.”
He couldn’t quite put it into words, but there was something about the aura Sunset gave off that was just very comforting. He was significantly less anxious than he would usually be, he just felt less nervous about her, it was strange.
*Diane was right, this school is full of weirdos.*
“I...met her in an alleyway a little past midnight, we started talking and-”
“Woah, wait, in an alleyway past midnight? Jason, those aren’t the kind of girls you want to associate with.” She said with concern in her voice.
“No, she...looked upset, so I just wanted to check on her to make sure she was ok. Then she wanted to talk with me, and she….took my first kiss.”
He heard Rarity give an excited squeal, leaning over to Jason with her hands on her face dramatically.
“Oh spill the tea! What was it like? Was it magical? Did you kiss her first or-?”
Sunset Shimmer loudly cleared her throat, furrowing her eyebrows as she glared at her. Rarity sat back down in her seat, giggling nervously.
“I apologize, I just...really enjoy hearing about others' love lives. But a lady should never be so...obtrusive. Anyway, go on now,”
Rarity said as she put her hands on her knees, tapping them excitedly.
“Um...ok. After she kissed me...she asked me if I wanted to have a...relationship with her, and said that I should take the day to come to a decision.”
Sunset’s eyebrows raised slightly in confusion, not entirely understanding what he was implying.
Jason shook his head, bringing his hand up to his face and awkwardly scratching his cheek. “I believe the term she used was...frenefits. ” He said with heavy emphasis.
There was silence among the group as Rarity and Sunset stared at him for a moment, he could almost hear the gears in their heads turning as they tried to understand what he was saying. There was almost an audible click as their eyes opened and their mouths opened in a circle, like their faces were saying ‘Oh’.
“Hawt.” He heard Rainbow Dash say, flinching when Applejack glared at her, like she was threatening to slap her again.
“I...wow, alright that’s not what I was expecting.” Sunset said as she turned toward her tray, picking up a fork and playing with it, like she didn’t seem that interested in actually eating. “How..well do you know her?”
*More than I should, less than you think. *
“Not very well, barely more than strangers, really.” He said as he put a spoon full of mashed potatoes in his mouth, swallowing before speaking again. “I...know she’s a student here, that she knows everyone in this town, and that she has siblings, a job, and is a part of a club. That’s about it.”
Pinkie let out an audible gulp, swallowing the last bit of her food and chugging it down with her milk. She seemed to be thinking about something, her eyes darting back and forth as she tried to work something out in her mind.
“Well, at least she isn’t from Crystal Prep, then I’d have to assume it was some elaborate plot to get back at us.” Sunset said with a scowl on her face.
*Seems like Diane wasn’t the only one who had issues with Crystal Prep, what happened to cause turmoil like that?*
“Darling, I don’t mean to sound obtuse, but this girl sounds like...a floozy. And that isn’t the kind of girl you want to have relations with.”
There was a...hot feeling he could feel in his body, similar to the heat he felt when Diane was straddling him, but less intense. He couldn’t quite explain it, but the feeling made him...agitated.
*Is this...what getting angry feels like? I don’t like it.*
“No, I don’t think so. “ He said with a bit of hostility, more sternness in his voice than he believed he’s ever had. “She told me that she wasn’t like that, and I believe her.”
“Partner, how exactly do you feel about this girl?”
*That’s the exact question I’ve been asking myself all day.*
“I’m...not sure. I like her, I think. She was nice to me and held the conversation, making up for my lack of conversation skills. But, you’re right. I don’t know her, but she didn’t know me either. I think...I deserve to give her a chance.”
Fluttershy put her hair behind her ears, opening and closing her mouth like she was going to say something.
“I...I think yo-”
Before Fluttershy got the chance to say anything, the bell signaling the ending of lunch. Fluttershy gasped out of surprise, going back to hiding behind her hair.
“Oh shoot, I gotta go, I can’t be late to class again, see ya.”
“I need to go too, I promised Soarin to meet him in the janitor’s closet after lunch, if ya get what I mean.”
Rainbow Dash and Applejack said as they got up and dumped their trays, quickly leaving the cafeteria with many others. Jason turned back and noticed that Fluttershy had already left, a bit surprised at how silent he was.
“Darling, as much as I’d love to help you, Sunset and I should be heading to class.” Rarity said as she began to stand out of her chair, her tray in her hand.
“Yeah, Cherilee hates it when her students are late, even by a second. I’m sorry we couldn’t have been of more help to you, it was nice meeting you!”
Just like that, it was just him and Pinkie. She stared at him for a moment, a blank expression on her face as she was thinking of something.
“Do you trust her?” She asked, no evident tone in her voice.
*Well, she could have just kissed me. But she asked for my permission first, she could have done a lot of things to me, but she didn’t.*
“Yeah,” He said as he ate the last of his mashed potatoes. “I think I do.”
As soon as he said that, her empty expression disappeared and was quickly replaced by that same childlike smile, the one that just seemed to irradiate joy and happiness.
“Then what else is there to say? If you can trust her, then you should already have your answer.”
Pinkie said as she stood up, her tray being surprisingly organized despite it being a mess earlier. “I gotta go now, I need to stop by the baking club and pick something up before I go to class. Good luck with your girl troubles.”
And just like that, he was alone again, just like it he was used.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
*That was...an interesting first day.*
Jason thought to himself as he threw his backpack across the room, face planting into his bed.
His room wasn’t really impressive, and was actually quite small. He had one bed barely big enough for one person, with white sheets, a blue blanket, and one pillow, and were all placed in the right corner of the room. Across from that was a small tv he would watch movies on when he had the time, and a small window to the left of that. His closet, with the few clothes he had, was in the back left of the room, covered by a small white door.
He didn’t have anything else in the room besides a fan he used on hot days, the room overall looked very bland. A black carpet with bright white walls and a roof, normal, like him.
“That was easier than I thought it’d be, but it didn’t really solve my problem.”
Jason let out a loud groan, flipping over and staring at the ceiling with his arms to his sides. “Pinkie seems nice, but she’s also really unpredictable. Her friends seem like good people, if a little....peculiar.”
He reached into his pocket with his right hand, pulling out his phone and seeing the message he got from Pinkie earlier. She had convinced him to give her his number, but he was just as bad at texting as he was at socializing in person. He hadn’t gotten around to opening it yet, he was still trying to figure out how to respond to ‘hiya ;)’.
“Should I ask Diane for her number? I don’t want to seem creepy, but even if she says yes, I feel like I’d just be annoying her. But I also want to talk with her outside of the alleyway.”
Jason brought his right hand up to his face, pinching the bridge of his nose out of frustration. “I’m still not even sure what to say to her. I want to say yes, because I really like her and she’s the first girl to be so forward with me. But I’m also worried I’m going to mess it up somehow, and I really don’t want to do that with her.”
He let out another frustrated groan, when did things get so complicated?
*I know I came here for something different, but I wasn’t expecting this!*
He heard a ding coming from his phone, signalling someone texted him. He looked at his phone, seeing that Pinkie had texted him again.
‘When are you going to be meeting alleyway girl?’
Alleyway girl was Diane, obviously. She somehow didn’t connect the dots that when he asked her about Diane, he was talking about the alleyway girl.
*Pinkie isn’t stupid, but she doesn’t seem like the smartest out of the six girls I met.*
Jason swiped up on his phone, beginning to type in his response.
‘Tonight at-’
He stopped for a moment, realizing something. She never said what time to be there, just tonight. She said that when she went there, she was usually there for a couple of hours. And when he met her, she had probably been there since maybe ten.
And right now, the time was ten thirty, which meant...
*She’s probably there right now, waiting for me.*
He sent a message to Pinkie, just saying ‘tonight’. Then he quickly put his phone back in his pocket, ignoring Pinkie’s near immediate response. He didn’t bother changing clothes, his weren’t dirty and he didn’t want to make her wait any longer.
*I...think I have an answer, just not sure if it's one she’ll be satisfied with.*
Chapter Three: BJ-Day. (NSFW)
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. Chapter Four: Pink Preference.
‘She’s not who you think she is.’
Jason spent a good portion of his night after that just staring at his phone, reading the message Pinkie sent him over and over again. For some reason, it baffled him. Not because of what it said, but because of what it implied. Who did he think Diane was? A girl he met in an alleyway by chance, who seemed to understand him better than most people did, and almost immediately made her sexual interest in him known. She was also almost overwhelmingly nice to him and said she wanted to try to change him, more than almost anyone in his life had.
Right now, he didn’t think she was anyone, in reality he barely knew anything about her. He’d be lying if he said that didn’t make things a bit more exciting, the mystery of who she was and what she’d do next made things more interesting. Jason quickly found himself becoming more and more infatuated with her, not only looking forward to the next time they’d meet, but also putting together the pieces of the puzzle. Who she was, why Pinkie Pie was such a touchy subject for her, and why she seemed so...attracted to him.
Which led to the other thing he couldn’t stop thinking about, getting his dick sucked by her in an alleyway.
He’d masturbated before of course, basically any guy that could has. But that was nothing like it, it was a lot more intense and felt way more amazing, there was also a sense of intimacy that came with it, he felt closer to her during those moments than he did with anyone else. The strange thing was he had always had a fear of getting STDs, which is one of the many reasons he avoided others. However, even after the events of last night, he just didn’t feel worried about it, even after she told him she was experienced. Jason really wasn’t sure why, he didn’t just suddenly become careless, but after seeing how concerned she was at times, he just didn’t think she would willingly do something like that to him.
*I guess...I trust her, huh, never thought I would be able to trust someone in highschool.*
At the moment, Jason was in the library, sitting at one of the tables meant for reading in the back. It was currently the middle of breakfast, he got to school early so he could quickly eat breakfast and head here, the same thing he did at his previous school and the same thing he’ll do here to avoid people. He had his arms laying on top of each other with his head buried in them, only his brown hair sticking out. He wore the same thing he had yesterday, this time with the addition of a dark black hoodie that covered most of his upper body. He had his eyes closed and was trying to organize his thoughts, but to anyone else it would look like he was just napping before class, so nobody would bother him.
“Hey there loverboy! Don’t you think it’s a bit early to be napping?”
*Almost nobody, it would seem .*
He didn’t need to raise his head to look who it was, that high pitched childlike voice couldn't be anyone else. He felt Pinkie Pie tussle his hair for a moment before sitting down in the chair beside him, the librarian not even bothering to tell her to quiet down, even they had to just learn to accept Pinkie’s rambunctious personality.
Usually, being touched would make him a little anxious, physical contact just kind of bothered him. Yet sometime yesterday Pinkie touching him just stopped bothering him, not that he particularly enjoyed it either, he felt neutral about it. Either getting so comfortable with Diane was making it easier for him to be around other people, or Pinkie just had a way with people that made them feel relaxed around her, it could have been both honestly.
“I got back last night kind of late, so I’m still a bit groggy.” He said as he raised his head to look at Pinkie, rubbing his eyes a bit to make it look like he’d just been sleeping.
Pinkie looked the same as she always had, though he noticed she wasn’t wearing as much makeup as before. He hadn’t even noticed she had been wearing makeup before until he saw her without it, though the changes were very miniscule. She still looked very pretty and had almost flawless skin, the only difference now was he could see slight bags under her eyes, it seemed she didn’t get much sleep last either. She was sitting on the chair facing him, her legs on top of one another and her arms on the table, one of them pointing upward so she could rest her head on it as she looked at him. Her hair also seemed to have a little less bounce than usual, he wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not.
“You were with her last night, weren’t you?” She said in a passive aggressive tone, her smile faltering for a moment.
Jason may have been terrible at reading a room, and with people in general, but even he could tell that Pinkie had some kind of problem with Diane. He opened his mouth as he was about to ask why they had problems with each other, but then quickly closed it when he remembered how well that went last time.
“Yeah, I was. We...talked for a bit, and I ended up not getting back until it was almost two.”
*Probably shouldn’t mention what exactly we did last night, it was embarrassing enough for me to talk to them about just the kissing, I don’t know if I could handle talking about more than that.*
Pinkie glared at him for a moment, like she could tell there was something he wasn’t telling her. Instead of just glaring at him until he told her, she closed her eyes and gave a reluctant sigh, then opening them and looked at him in concern.
“Do you trust her?” She asked, a more serious tone in her voice than Jason thought she was capable of, it was almost scary.
Luckily for Jason, he had already been thinking about that earlier. He cleared his throat and turned to face her, trying to make the most stern expression on his face as he could.
“I do, is there a reason I shouldn’t?”
Pinkie looked him straight in the eye for a solid thirty seconds like she was trying to win a staring contest with him, and to his surprise, not blinking at all. This was a bit difficult for Jason since looking people in the eye was hard for him, even if it were Diane. So he couldn’t help but exhale when she looked away from him, turning her gaze down to her skirt as she reached into a pocket and pulled out her phone.
He noticed that the case was a cupcake one, he wasn’t really sure what else he was expecting. She turned it on and typed in her password with almost inhuman speed, before scrolling through it like she was looking for something. She suddenly stopped and turned her phone around, extending her arm so the phone was right in his face.
“This is her, right?” She asked hastily.
Jason looked at Pinkie for a moment, then down at the picture she was showing him. It was definitely Diane, those blue eyes, pink skin, and long and straight pink hair that hung off her like a curtain were unmistakable. She seemed to be at some kind of bar, which didn’t seem right since he knew she wasn’t old enough to drink, but it also didn’t really surprise him that much if she lied about her age occasionally to get into places like that. She was leaned over the counter showing off her cleavage, obviously trying to persuade the bartender to keep giving her drinks since from how red her face was and several empty shot glasses around her showed she was plenty drunk already.
The place looked like a strip club or something like that, a party was going on judging from the amount of people around, he was actually a bit surprised there wasn’t anyone trying to hit on her in the picture. He also noticed the clothes she was wearing, which looked very different from what he’s seen her with. A dark pink tank top with a black t-shirt underneath, wearing a leather jacket on top of it all. Her pants were dark black skinny jeans, and her shoes were blue high heels. He had to admit she pulled off the look very well, but somehow it just...didn’t seem to suit her, or maybe that was just because it isn’t what he was used to seeing her in.
Coincidentally, that’s the most clothed he’s seen her, he wasn’t sure whether to be proud of that or not.
“Yeah, that’s...that’s her. Why do you have a picture of her?”
Pinkie pulled the phone out of his face, looking down at it as she seemed to be swiping through photos. “Well, before I answer that, I have to apologize. I kind of half lied to you when I said I didn’t know anyone named Diane, I know of her, but I don’t know her personally. I wanted to wait a little bit to make sure it was the same person, sorry!”
As she apologized, she stopped swiping on her phone, finding whatever she was looking for. She turned it around to face Jason again and pushed it against her face, her cheek squishing against it as she gave him a sheepish smile. On the phone was another picture of Diane, though this one was her in a group photo with two other people he didn’t recognize, holding up a peace sign and smiling at the camera.
“You were right though, she does look just like me, we could be twinsies! She’s got my eyes, my skin, even my fashion, pink! Buuuuuut her hair is completely different from mine, and I don’t really drink, so we’re at least a little different. Also I triple dog checked with my parents and I’m like, ninety nine point nine percent sure neither of them have a secret family or an affair. So I guess she’s just my doppelganger or something!”
Jason stared at Pinkie in shock for a few moments, bringing his hand up to his head and scratching it in confusion before lowering it back down to rest on his leg, every answer just seemed to come with another question.
“Ok, so, wait. You’ve never met Diane? So, then how did you get the picture then?”
She snorted in response, like he asked a question with the most obvious answer in the world.
“I had one of my friends take the picture for me, silly!”
*In hindsight, yeah, that’s pretty obvious.*
Pinkie stopped pushing the phone against her face and laid it in her lap, beginning to text someone. “I couldn’t really tell you when she started showing up, she just sort of did. Some of my friends brought her up to me like you did, asking if she was my sister and stuff like that. I got super interested in her, and kept trying to meet her myself, but I just couldn’t! Believe me, I tried!
Then I heard she likes to go to raves and stuff like that, and I...don’t, not my type of parties. My friend Vinyl Scratch DJ’s and takes gigs at places like that for extra cash, so I asked her if Diane showed up to send me a couple of pictures of her if she showed up, which is how I got these!”
Pinkie showed a few more pictures she had of Diane by swiping her phone, it appeared Pinkie had quite a few pictures of her. All of them were pictures of Diane in a strip club or some other kind of party area, sometimes wearing something that was very revealing, and other times she was wearing significantly more, and she seemed to be at least a little tipsy in most of them.
Normally, seeing a woman in clothing that skimpy would’ve made him blush a bit and look away, even if it was just in a picture. Since it was Diane, and he had already seen the majority of Diane’s body and had it burned into his memory, it didn’t really bother him that much. He also wasn’t going to bother pointing out how strange it was to have that many photos of the same person, he was still trying to categorize what counted as ‘weird’ with Pinkie.
“Alright, that explains that. What did you mean by ‘She’s not who you think she is?’” Jason asked with more of an accusatory tone than he intended, causing her to flinch when he asked.
“That’s...my b, I phrased that wrong. Hmmm, how do I say this?” She asked herself as she began scratching the back of her head, closing her eyes thoughtfully for a moment.
She opened her eyes with a more focused look on her face, lowering her hand and just staring at her phone, almost like she was lost in thought for a moment, an uncharacteristically blank look on her face.
“Actually, almost anytime someone told me they’ve seen her or met her has been at a club or something. She usually only shows up at places with alcohol, I’ve rarely heard of her being anywhere else. Then a couple of months ago, she just sort of...fell off the radar. No one had seen or heard of her for a while, I started getting worried. When you told me you found her, I couldn’t help but feel really relieved! I was afraid she had drank herself to death or something, I’m glad she’s ok.”
Pinkie looked up at Jason with a slight smirk, a look of concern and what seemed like guilt on her face. “It’s strange, but even though we haven’t met, I can’t help but feel connected to her somehow. Like she’s my long lost sister or something, it doesn’t really make sense, but that’s ok, where’s the fun in making sense?” She said with a giggle, though it did little to hide how shaky her voice had gotten.
Jason wasn’t sure how to react, he couldn’t tell if Pinkie was sad or not, he really was terrible with people. He knew he should say something, but he didn’t know what, and he was sure he would say something that would have just made it worse. He stayed there in silence, waiting for Pinkie to say something, and feeling a lot more awkward than he usually did.
“Anyway, about what I meant.” Pinkie suddenly said, her chipper tone returning. She was giving that wide, happy smile again, the one that made even him want to smile.
He still felt a bit concerned about whatever just happened, but it was out of his area of understanding, so he was just going to let it be. She seemed fine now, he didn’t want to risk pushing that.
“This might be a bit presumptuous of me, but I like to think that I’m pretty good at understanding people, I have to to be able to make them happy, you know? Like I said, I haven’t actually met her, but I can make assumptions based on what I know. Unless her behavior’s changed, she’s…” Her smile faltered for a moment, her eyes half closed like she was remembering something unpleasant. “Not in a good place.”
“What do you mean?” Jason asked in a concerned tone.
“People like her...they have an unhealthy way of dealing with things, in the sense that they don’t.”
Pinkie fidgeted in her chair a bit, looking up at Jason for a moment before glancing back down, like it was suddenly difficult for her to look at him. She put her phone back in her skirt pocket and began twiddling her thumbs, needing something to do as she talked to make it easier for her to think if he had to guess.
“Going to parties every other night, drinking until you pass out, those are things you do when you’re trying to distract yourself....or running away from something. I won’t try to guess what she was dealing with, that’s not my business or my right. As much as I’d like to help her if I could, I don’t think she’d accept. She kept going to parties like that and kept drinking, pushing off whatever she was avoiding dealing with for as long as she could. Sure, it works, for a while. Eventually though, it’ll catch up with you, pushing it off like that would just make it worse. When it does…”
She trailed off whatever she was saying, her thumbs stopped moving and her eyes got sadder, he could’ve sworn some strands of her hair go from curly to flat in a few seconds. It was clear she was talking from personal experience, either someone she was close to, or herself. Whatever she was remembering right now was clearly a painful memory, if not straight up traumatic.
Jason may have been borderline useless with people, but he’s seen enough movies to know that when something like this happens, trying to comfort them anyway possible is the best thing to do. He knew physical contact helped a lot, just touching their hand can work. He began reaching his hand forward to touch hers, before quickly retracting it as a wave of social anxiety and thought of messing up came over him.
What if he did something wrong? What if it just made it worse? What if she didn’t want him to touch her? All these thoughts filled his head as he tried to stop himself from shaking, being touched was one thing, initiating the contact was a very different one for him, his social anxiety had always been like that. No matter how comfortable someone was with him, it was an entirely different process for him to get like that with someone else.
Except for Diane, Diane was...special somehow, he was still trying to figure out how.
*Not yet, I’m not there yet, I’m not sure if I ever will be.*
“Pinkie...are you ok?” He asked in a slightly shaky voice, for now asking was all he could do.
That seemed to snap her out of her trance, her eyes widened and she let out a slight ‘huh’ noise as she looked around the library, remembering where she was and what she was talking about.
“Oops! Sorry, zoned out there for a sec!” She said as she brought her fist up to her head and knocked it against it, sticking the tip of her tongue out of the corner of her mouth and making a muffled ‘doink’ noise.
*....I’m going to choose to not acknowledge that.*
A few awkward seconds passed by before she returned back to normal, though now she only smirked and it seemed a bit forced, even to Jason.
“As I was saying before my train of thought got derailed, I think all that distracting caught up to her, and she had a breakdown. That’s why she kind of just disappeared, it was just serendipity that the first person to see her again was the guy just transferring in. I can’t really tell you why she wants...that kind of relationship with you though, as far as I know, she wasn’t the type of girl to do hookups and stuff. From what you’ve told me, she seems fine. That’s not reliable though, I also think she’s the kind of person who’s used to putting on a face. She doesn’t like other people to pity her or try to help her, she feels like she has to deal with her problems herself, which is why I don’t think she’d accept my help if I tried to give it. Makes me a bit sad, I want to be close with my doppelganger.”
Jason stared at Pinkie, thinking on what she told him. Everything she said made sense, a frightening amount of sense, actually. It almost sounded like Pinkie was psychoanalyzing her, someone she hadn’t even met. Diane was nice to him and was a good person, but he couldn’t deny there were things he was hiding from her, but he couldn’t blame her for that. He was still basically strangers with her, but that didn’t stop him from noticing things like that. While he wouldn’t have guessed that Diane had spent a lot of time drinking and partying, it didn't surprise him either, there was still a lot about her he didn’t know yet, a lot he wanted to know.
He also couldn’t help but feel...worried for her, if any of what Pinkie was saying was accurate. He wanted to help Diane, the same way she was trying to help him. At the same time, he knew that if she didn’t want to talk about something, she wouldn’t talk about it. If he tried to push it, he might just piss her off. The last thing he wants to do is piss off one of the nicest people he’s ever met, especially not someone who might end up taking his virginity.
“Pinkie, you’re actually really smart, huh?” Jason said blunty.
Pinkie blinked her eyes rapidly, trying to register the compliment she just got. As soon as she did, she waved her hand back and forth as her lips twitched like she wasn’t sure whether to smile or not.
“No! I’m...really not, I just pay attention to things most people don’t think are important. Besides, even if I was, my older sister is way smarter than I am! She’s getting a PhD and is going to be a geologist!”
“I need your help with something, have you ever dated a boy before?”
She suddenly stopped waving her hand, her eyes widening a bit in surprise at his sudden question. Her mouth opened and closed as she tried to stutter out a response, before stopping and just lowering her head dejectedly.
“I...haven’t, I’ve never dated anyone. I guess most guys just can’t handle me, huh?”
Her question was rhetorical, but there was a bit of hurt in her voice. Jason couldn’t exactly empathise, sure he’s never dated anyone either, but he didn’t care about that sort of thing. Pinkie was a social butterfly and cared about being friends with everyone, which meant surely there was a boy or two she was interested in that just wasn’t interested back.
What was surprising to him was that there hadn’t been a boy who was interested back, there was plenty of reasons to. Her personality was a bit annoying, sure, but she cared a lot about people and just wanted to make others happy. Plus she had a very pretty face and an above average body, from what he’d just seen, he was pretty sure she was smarter than she let on. It was strange.
*Then again, strange is kind of synonymous with Pinkie.*
“Regardless, I still need your help as a woman. I...don’t know the first thing about romance, or what makes someone attracted to another. Ever since she kissed me, I’ve been struggling to understand what she sees in me. I was hoping with your...talent for paying attention to things most others don’t, you could help me with this.”
He closed his eyes and held his breath, expecting her to say no, he didn’t think she had any reason to help him. Then he heard her giggle excitedly, her chair scraping against the floor closer to him. He opened his eyes to see her face to face with him, her hand on her chin as she stared at him thoughtfully, like she was looking for something.
He jumped back in his chair a bit, startled at how close she had suddenly got. She didn’t seem to notice, just continued to examine his face.
“Hmmm, well, you aren’t ugly or anything, but you aren’t particularly handsome either. You aren’t too skinny but you don’t have any muscles either, your skin is mostly clear, but it’s also really pale since you don’t go out that often. I haven’t talked to you that much since you have problems communicating, but you seem really nice, if a bit awkward. I guess the best word I could use to describe you would be average, but that might be exactly why she’s attracted to you.”
“She’s...attracted to me because I’m average?”
Pinkie leaned back in her chair, reaching into her hair and pulling out a piece of candy that somehow didn’t have any hair on it. She furrowed her eyebrows in frustration as she tried to unwrap it, having trouble doing that for some reason.
“Despite what most modern movies might make you think, hot girls actually prefer to date guys less attractive than them. No matter how confident or mentally stable a girl might seem, all girls are insecure about something, especially when they're in a relationship. They’re always worried about whether they’re good enough for someone, or if someone better would come along. Average or ugly guys aren’t likely to go after someone attractive since they have low self esteem, so if they get with some hot girl, they don’t really have eyes for anyone else. They aren’t likely to cheat and would be satisfied with the relationship, it works out pretty well.
No offense to you, but you have very low self esteem, and your social anxiety makes it hard for you to even talk to most girls, so much as hit on them. You don’t have any positive aspects about you, but no negative ones either. Get rid of your communication problems, and you’d be the perfect candidate for a girl with major insecurity issues.”
As soon as she stopped talking, she gasped as her lips curved into a toothy grin, successfully unwrapping the piece of candy. She tossed it in her mouth and began chewing, her face suddenly tightening up in a grimace. She spit the piece of candy back in the wrapper and wrapped it around it, tossing it across the room straight into a trash basket.
“Expired, definitely expired.” She mumbled to herself as she reached into her hair again, this time pulling out a lollipop.
Jason stared at her stupefied, both by the fact that she just casually hid things in her hair, and what she was saying. He more or less knew what she said already, he had noticed at his previous highschool that there were a fair amount of couples where the girl was evidently more attractive than the guy, but was that really the reason? Because they were insecure? It sounded right, but that meant he had understood people even less than he thought he did.
*If she’s right, that means even Pinkie has insecurities, I wonder what about? What kind of things is Diane insecure about?”
“Well…let’s say you’re right, that doesn’t really explain why she likes me. I’m...a loner, wouldn’t she want someone who’s average who can be sociable like her?”
“Yeah, she would, if she were sociable herself.” Pinkie said matter of factly, unwrapping the sucker and giving it a cautious lick as she tested if it was expired or not, liking the taste and immediately putting it in her mouth with the stick poking out the corner of her mouth.
She looked up at Jason and noticed the confused look he was giving her, realizing what she had just said probably didn’t make sense if she didn’t explain.
“Ok, so, let me explain.” Pinkie brought one of her hands up, leaving it clenched while the other one was holding the sucker in her mouth. “From what I’ve heard, she never initiates conversations or approaches anyone. Anytime she’s talked to anyone has been after they talk to her first, but she’s not bad at it, just doesn’t like it.” One of Pinkie’s fingers unclenched, pointing upwards like she was counting something. “She doesn’t align herself with any cliques or specific types of people, she can get along with basically anyone. Again, only if they approach her. If left alone, she could go the entire night without talking to a single person.”
Pinkie raised another finger, adding something else to whatever she was counting. “The strangest thing is, she doesn’t even have a phone! In this day and age, that’s crazy! Do you have any idea how bored I would be if I didn’t have my phone? How else would I play Candy Crush!” She said exuberantly as she raised another finger. “She also apparently has a lot of hobbies, which means she has a lot of free time. But outside of the parties she goes to, I don’t think she hangs out with people in her free time, which means she spends a lot of it alone.” She raised another finger, her fourth one, leaving only the thumb left.
“Finally, she talks about having a job and being in a club at school, but she won’t tell anyone where she works or what club! She obviously wants to keep people out of her life, but to a point where she’s overly defensive about it.” She raised her thumb, counting the fifth reason for whatever criteria she was making.
“She meets most of the marks, which can only make her one thing: A popular loner!” She said as she put down all her fingers except for her pointer finger, accompanied by a crunching noise as she bit down and began chewing on the candy in her mouth. “Just like stands users attract other stand users, loners attract other loners. That’s probably partly why she’s so interested in you, there aren’t a lot of loners around here and meeting someone like her wouldn’t be easy, plus you’re new around here so you’ve got this whole ‘Mr Mysterious’ vibe girls just eat up.”
Jason’s eyes widened in realization, it all made sense. She said that she usually kept to herself and avoided attention, but she just seemed really good socially, was she really a loner? If she was, was that really the reason she was so interested in him? Just because they were both loners? It had to be more than that, it just didn’t make sense for someone like her to want someone like him. He couldn’t help but feel she deserved better.
*Also, Mr Mysterious? I don’t really come off as mysterious, right?*
“Which...kind of leads me back to why I think you should be careful around her.” Pinkie said with a slightly sardonic tone, pulling the half chewed sucker and staring at it with a blank look on her face. “She’s told multiple people she goes to this school, but that’s not true. I’ve asked teachers, students, even the principles, none of them have seen her around here. No one named Diane is on any club rosters, and no one has seen her during any of their classes, which meant she more than likely lied. I think...I think she goes to Crystal Prep, another high school around here. If she does, she’s not the kind of person you should trust, most of the students there aren’t really good people.”
*Crystal Prep, isn’t that the school Diane said she hated?*
It was, he distinctly remembered what they talked about when he first met her. He remembered the rant she went on about them and how much she hated them. He admitted he was curious why the two highschools seemed to dislike each other so much, but it really wasn’t his business, even if he was apart of one of the highschool’s now.
“No, I don’t think so. She seemed to hate them as much as the rest of this school does, for whatever reason. Plus, I...trust her, I really do. I don’t want to think that she’d lie like that, not without good reason. If you can’t find her, It’s probably because…” Jason thought back to all the times he had brought Pinkie up to Diane, how she always seemed to scowl and her voice got bitter whenever she got brought up.
It was obvious there was some bad blood between the two, but it seemed to be one sided. According to Pinkie, they had yet to meet. Hate seemed too strong, but there was some disdain from Diane, he just didn’t know what or why. Pinkie seemed to care for her, so he couldn’t tell her that, he didn’t want to hurt anyone, especially not her or Diane who’d been so nice to him.
“She’s probably avoiding you.” Jason said as he glanced away, he didn’t like being dishonest. While what he was saying wasn’t exactly a lie, he was leaving out enough to where it felt like one.
Pinkie looked up at him in surprise, as if she hadn’t even considered the possibility. Then her eyes lowered again, the realization of that being the possible truth saddening her. “I hadn’t thought of that, she must really not like me if she would go so far to avoid me. Why? What did I do to-”
Pinkie was interrupted by the sound of the bell ringing, signalling the ending of breakfast and starting of class. She flinched as she suddenly stood up forgetting she was even at school for a moment.
“Oh, I’m going to be late! I’ve got to go to my locker and get my stuff and head to class!” Pinkie said in a panicked tone as she pushed the chair in, eating the rest of the lollipop and throwing away the stick into the same trashcan.
Jason reached down to pick up his backpack, having left it on the ground beside his chair when he came in. He stood up and was about to walk out to his first class, being stopped by Pinkie when she stood beside him, placing her hand on his shoulder and leaning into his ear to whisper something.
“Thanks for talking with me, I know it’s hard for you. I don’t mean to make you worry about all my problems, I just get worried about my friends. Just be careful, k?” She said in a hushed tone, her voice more gentle than he’d expect from Pinkie. She quickly ran out of the library, having left so fast she left smoke that was in the shape of her like a cartoon.
He flinched when she said that, feeling a sense of familiarity with what she just said. That sounded exactly like Diane, she’d said it enough to where he’d recognize it. More and more he saw similarities between them, were they really completely unrelated? He knew the whole myth about everyone having a doppelganger, but was that really what was happening here?
He shook his head dismissively, he didn’t have time to think about that right now, he needed to get to class.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The rest of the day had been mostly uneventful, the only thing else that had happened was during lunch. He got his food and went off somewhere else to eat on his own, Pinkie messaged him and asked him where he was, he answered that by saying he preferred to eat alone.
Surprisingly, she didn’t push him and just decided to let him be.
He went home, took a nap, and studied a little. After finishing his homework, it ended up being a little past eight. He was laying on his bed, his arms against the pillow and his head against his arms with his back facing the wall. He didn’t feel like sleeping yet, and he was pretty sure Diane wasn’t going to be there tonight, she seemed like she would tell him when she would be there.
At least he hoped so.
Now was the time a day he spent collecting his thoughts, reviewing all the knowledge he’d collected and letting osmosis do its thing. Specifically, the talk he had with Pinkie in the library. Throughout the day, he kind of just put himself on autopilot. Not thinking about anything in particular and just focused on learning, not allowing himself to relax until he’d done all his studying and homework was done. Once he did, that entire conversation came to the front of his mind.
Learning that Diane used to spend a lot of her time drinking and partying, that despite Diane’s feelings towards Pinkie they had never met, and especially that Diane might have only been interested in him because he was a loner and because she had insecurities. It was...a lot to take in for him, some of it he truly hadn’t been expecting. Ever since he’d met Diane, it seemed like his world started getting a bit more hectic. Diane was a mystery in a lot of ways and he’d been slowly getting more pieces to the puzzle, it was hard just to figure out where they fit.
Ironically, Jason hated puzzles.
While confusion was the strongest emotion he was feeling right then, there was something else, something that’d been there since his talk with Pinkie. The thought that Diane was only interested in him because of her own insecurities and because she was like him sort of...bothered him, in a weird way.
He’d never once thought himself as a special, average is what suited him. Diane however made him feel special, the way she said that she just felt comfortable around him and that she liked him more than most guys had an effect on him that he had never experienced before. There hasn’t been a single girl he thought of more than her, and he was just as surprised that she said that she had thought of him, even if just once.
If it were true that she only liked him because of her own problems, he’d feel...hurt.
There was a sudden dinging noise from his phone, distracting him from his pessimistic pondering. He reached into his pocket and pulled it out, seeing that he had gotten a message from a number he didn’t recognize. This phone was relatively new, so he doubted it was spam.
‘Hey there, Gummy Bear. I need your help choosing something for me, for the next time we meet. ;)’
His eyebrows raised as he read the message, confused as to who was messaging him. There were three more dings, the first two were images, the third was her asking ‘Pink or Black?’ His internet wasn’t the best since he chose the cheapest option, so it took a few mmoments to load. As soon as it did, his body shot up and started leaning over as his hands shakily held the phone between them. His eyes widened out of surprise as they were glued to the screen, his entire body quickly getting numbingly warm, especially his face and groin.
The first picture was of Diane, her body almost entirely naked except for two pieces of clothing. She had taken the picture in her bathroom, showing her entire body in the reflection. He could see every inch of her bare skin, which was about as flawless and beautiful as he thought it’d be. The only thing she was wearing was a pink lacy bra, it didn’t look like a push up bra, but it was so tight against her large breast that it might as well have been. She was also wearing a matching pair of pink panties, but it didn’t cover very much. It was tied around her lower hip, barely covering any of her upper thighs and covering enough of her womanhood to where he couldn’t make anything out. The hand that wasn’t taking the picture she had beside her head, giving him a peace sign along with a devilish smile, one of her eyes closed as she seemed to be winking at him.
The other picture she took looked mostly the same, her wearing almost no clothing and showing a lot of skin. Instead of taking a picture of her reflection, this selfie was taken overhead, showing off her body from above her. The underwear she was wearing now covered about the same, but they were black instead of pink. They were also made out of a thicker material, a little less see through than the pink ones. Her other hand wasn’t giving a peace sign, this time was pulling on the center of the bra, letting him see more of her breast. She was giving him another winking smile, but this one seemed a bit more sadistic and teasing than the previous one.
To say these pictures aroused him would be an understatement, he felt very similar to when she would straddle him, but it was less enjoyable since there was no physical contact. He’d heard of guys asking girls for nudes before, but he had never understood the appeal of it. This was the closest he’d ever gotten to one, and the fact that Diane trusted him enough to send him this and so confidently show off her body to him made him a bit happy.
He knew there should have been a lot of questions he should be asking, like how he got his number or why she got a phone when she said she didn’t like having one. It was more than a little suspicious, and he was sure she’d be expecting him to ask a lot of questions. Right now, he only had one question on his mind, and he already had the answer.
‘...Pink…’
Author's Note
Wow, didn't realize it had been like a month since I updated this. I was so focused on finishing the arc my other fanfic was on, I kind of lost track of timetoo sexy.
Like with my other stories, I would really appreciate if you told me of any grammar issues or story inconsistences. This is my first romance/sex story, and I'm not very confident in my writing, so I'm expecting some issues along the way. I also really appreciate comments, whether they be criticism, or just stating there's something about the chapter you liked. Thanks for reading, enjoy!
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Chapter Six: The Closest He's Ever Been. (NSFW)
Never in his entire life had Jason been so happy it was Friday.
He had almost always had a consistent sleep schedule, he needed to for his job, which he’ll have to get another one soonish. But in the last three days, Diane has managed to completely mess that up. First by keeping him awake as he couldn’t stop thinking about her, and then by being unable to stop thinking about her and what she’d done to him. He didn’t mind it that much since he was used to being tired, but it just proved how much of an impact Diane has had on his life so far.
Like he’d expected, he had trouble falling asleep. He was coming down from the high of having phone sex with her, which wasn’t something he thought he’d ever experience. It was also the first time he’d ever felt excited about the next day, so much so it was hard for him to calm down enough to fall asleep.
The school day felt a lot longer than it usually did, he always dreaded going, but didn’t mind it so much when he actually went. Now, he actually wanted the day to be over. It wasn’t like there was a new episode of a tv show he wanted to watch or anything.
He was excited to see Diane, and also a bit nervous.
He was also a bit surprised that Pinkie didn’t approach him in the library again that morning, he was sure there were things she wanted to ask him about Diane, she seemed curious about her almost to the point of obsession.
Strangely enough, he felt a bit disappointed that she didn’t, disappointment wasn’t something he was very familiar with when it came to people. Usually, talking to almost anyone was anxiety inducing and he was worried he was going to say the wrong thing. With Pinkie, he didn’t feel like that. She seemed to just perfectly understand his communication problems, and being around her felt comfortable. Like Diane, she was also trying to help him with his social problems.
The more he interacted with them, the more he realized that they were just as similar as they are different.
On his way back home, after reminding himself what was happening later that night for what felt like the umpteenth time, he realized he had another place to stop at first. He never bought condoms before, but he knew he could get them at pretty much any convenience store. It was a bit embarrassing, but luckily the store clerk didn’t ask anything other than wondering if he wanted it in a bag, and he was able to quickly get out of there.
He wasn’t able to study or do any homework he had either, he wouldn’t be able to concentrate, and none of it wasn’t something he couldn’t just do over the weekend. He ended up pacing around his room nervously, leaving the condom wrapped on the nightstand for when she arrived. There wasn’t much else he could do, he had absolutely no experience with stuff like this and didn’t know what to do. He had peed at least three times while waiting, both out of being nervous and he would hate having to go to the bathroom in the middle of that.
The only thing else he ended up changing was what he was wearing, usually, he’d wear jeans, a t-shirt, and just socks. Now, he was wearing a t-shirt with sweatpants and no socks, not sure whether he looked good in it or not. He took a shower before hand and cleaned himself as thoroughly as possible, though there wasn’t much else he could do, he didn’t even know what women thought was physically attractive in men.
Jason stopped his incessant pacing when he heard a chiming noise from his phone, something he set to tell him when Diane specifically texted him. He sent her the address earlier that day like she asked, and he’d been waiting anxiously for her to message him. He quickly swiped his phone off the nightstand, seeing the exact message he wanted to.
‘I’m outside. >;3’
While he was a bit ashamed at how quickly he did so, he put his phone back down on the nightstand and opened the door to his room and started walking downstairs to his living room. The bottom floor of his apartment was where everything else was, and there was significantly more space than upstairs.
Right outside his room before the wooden stairs was his bathroom, which was the basic white tiled room with all the bare necessities. As soon as he got to the bottom, to the right was what consisted of his living room. Just a chair in the corner with a bookshelf beside it, both things that came with the apartment and very little books actually being on the shelf.
The left side was the kitchen, which was just a counter with a microwave on it, an oven to the left of it, and a fridge to the right. He kept all eating and drinking utensils in a cabinet above the microwave, which was only enough stuff for one person. The wallpapers were somewhat torn and the brown carpet wasn’t in the best condition, but it was more than enough for him.
He walked up to the blue wooden door that led to the outside, peeking through the peephole the door had to see the other side. He didn’t recognize her at first, she was wearing a rather large, dark blue hoodie and sweatpants. She had her hood up and was covering most of her face, if it weren’t for the fact she was looking directly into the peephole and waving with that typical smirk of hers, he wouldn’t have been able to tell it was her.
Jason didn’t know why she was wearing a hoodie, maybe to conceal who she was? He wasn’t sure why she’d want to do that, it might have even had something to do with her sneaking out of her house so her sisters wouldn’t notice. He didn’t know, and it wasn’t his business either.
He unlocked the door and unhooked the chain that kept it shut, it came with the apartment and he thought he might as well use it. He opened the door and shut it behind her, she pulled her hood back and looked around.
“Sorry it’s not the best, I cou-”
He didn’t get to finish his sentence, as Diane had brought her hand up to his nose and flicked the tip, not even turning around to do so.
“You stop that. It’s fine, you should be glad you can afford a place at all. You’re independent and can provide for yourself, most girls love that in a guy.”
She turned to face him and grabbed him by the collar, pulling him to her face like she was going to kiss him. Right before their lips touched, she stopped, giving him a sadistic little grin.
“Now, are you going to be a gentleman and escort me to your room? Or are you going to make me find it all by myself?”
Jason suddenly felt his face get absurdly warm, especially his cheeks and ears, as he found himself looking directly into her eyes and inches away from a kiss. He opened his mouth and tried to stutter out a response, before just giving up.
“Yeah...it’s this way.” He said with a defeated tone, Diane letting go of his collar.
He walked past Diane, going towards the stairs that led to this room. As soon as he walked past her, he felt her warm hands snake in under his arms and around his chest, pulling him into her. He blushed as he felt her soft breast press against his back, the familiar warmth and softness of them bringing a numbing heat to his body he was getting to know very well. She nuzzled her face into his chin, her tongue sticking out and licking him from his collarbone to his neck, inhaling deeply through her nose.
“You smell nice, and taste clean, did you clean yourself up just for little old me?” Diane whispered into his ear, lightly biting his earlobe as her hot breath blew onto him.
“I-i...thought-” Jason was finding it very difficult to speak, only barely able to hear her whispers over his own heartbeat.
He couldn’t think properly as he got more aroused by the second, her hands moving around his body and pressing it more into her own. Her right hand stayed on his chest, her pointer finger drawing a circle around one of his nipples. Her left hand kept slowly moving lower, the feeling of her fingernails tracing against his skin was pushing him over the edge. He couldn’t stop himself from letting a slight grunt escape his lips, closing his eyes in anticipation as her fingers slipped under his pantsline.
Then, without any warning, it all stopped. She pulled both her hands off him, taking her mouth off his ear and stepping back a few inches.
“What are we standing around for? Let’s go to your room.” She said nonchalantly as she walked in front him, smacking his ass as she did, shaking her hips to the side noticeably more than usual.
“Y-you’re...a real tease, you know that?” Jason mumbled, his hand on his chest as he tried to calm himself down, unable to stop himself from panting a bit.
“Wouldn’t be as much fun if I wasn’t.”
They didn’t say anything else as they walked up the stairs, she stood in front of the door to his bedroom, like she knew that’s what it was. He opened the door and walked in, she followed and shut the door behind them.
“This is my room, it’s not much, but make yourself at home.”
“Welp, don’t need these anymore.”
(Sexy stuff starts here, skip if you want.)
He turned around to see what she was doing, only for his jaw to drop in the process. She had somehow already managed to get her hoodie off and onto the floor, her sweatpants down to her ankles. Like she told him last night, she was indeed wearing the same pink set of underwear she had sent him pictures of. What really flabbergasted him was the fact this was the first time he clearly got to see her body in person, and how different it was from pictures.
She was incredibly slender, and yet still perfectly voluptuous. She wasn’t an ounce overweight, her body resembled that more of an athlete than a normal teenage girl. He didn’t see even a bit of hair on her either, he wondered if she had shaved before coming here. He knew it was as perfect to feel as it looked, seeing it never failed to arise a desire in him to touch her body to his heart’s content.
“You weren’t….wearing a shirt under that?”
“Of course not, don’t you know?” She asked in a slightly sarcastic tone, kicking off her sweatpants as it landed somewhere on the floor. “If a girl is at home and wearing a hoodie, we are not wearing a shirt underneath.”
Without saying another word, she pounced on him, like a predator onto its prey. She pinned him with his back against his bed, their bodies on top of one another with their faces inches apart, her hands on both sides of his head. Her breathing sounded labored and erratic, he could feel how hot her entire body was as they made skin to skin contact, and he could see the raw lust in her eyes.
“I think a mixture of last night and a few minutes ago was more than enough foreplay, so let’s just jump right into it.”
Their lips crashed together just like last time, with Diane slipping her tongue into his mouth, quickly establishing dominance. This time felt different somehow, less...restricted.
If she was giving in, then so would he.
Just this once, he was going to throw away his reason and logic, ignore all his thoughts of failure and hurting her. She had told him that nothing he could do would make her upset, and he was going to believe her.
He began kissing back as much as he could, though he doubted he was very good at it. He brought his left hand around her back, grabbing as much of her ass in his hand as he could. He slipped his right hand under her bra, squeezing her soft breast and pinching her nipple between his finger and his thumb. She let out a slight squeal into his mouth, pulling her lips away from his for a moment.
“You’re...less hesitant than usual, I think I like that.” She said with a smile, moving her hands behind her back. He heard the sound of her unhooking her bra, pulling it off and tossing it to the side. Her large tits bounced out almost eagerly, her erect pink nipples poking against his body.
Instead of kissing him again, she brought her mouth to his neck, licking a specific spot on it, he could just barely feel her teeth grazing his skin.
“Do you know why most people like giving hickeys?” She whispered into his ear, sounding a bit out of breath.
She didn’t give him the time to respond, placing her lips on his neck and starting to suck on it. Her lips were incredibly soft and something about the way she was doing that sent a tingling sensation through his body unlike anything else. He sharply inhaled as she pulled her lips off, coming with a slight popping he noise, he felt her saliva on his neck and something else she left there.
“It’s because it’s kind of like marking your territory, showing that that person belongs to them.” She murmured, an almost triumphant looking smile on his face, like she was proud she had so much control over him.
He was still touching her body, it was so soft and enjoyable he almost felt like he couldn’t let go, but he could feel his cock as hard as it had ever been poking through his pants. It was erect to the point of almost pain, but even if he tried, he wasn’t sure if she’d let him pull it out.
He felt her bring her right hand down to his waist, grabbing his shirt and bringing it up to his chest. She began to slowly lower her body, placing her tongue in the center of his chest, tracing the tip down his body. Her tongue was easily the warmest part of her body, he couldn’t stop himself from shuddering as more of his body was covered in her saliva, he wasn’t even sure when he started sweating.
Soon her face was gone from his vision, his hand no longer touching her body, he quickly found himself missing it. He shook in anticipation as her tongue stopped at just below his belly button, her head rising slightly and no longer licking him. It took her less than a second to pull down his pants and underwear to his knees, his member sprung out and poked her nose. He could feel her hot breath on the tip, both of her soft hands resting on his upper thighs.
“Sorry, I don’t have the patience to play with you this time.”
He wasn’t what she meant by that, before he could look, he felt that same godly sensation he had two nights prior, a lot more quickly than he was prepared for. Last time, she took it slow, putting it in her mouth inch by inch. Not this time, instead, she put the entire thing in at once, without even slightly gagging or flinching. The warm, wet, and soft feeling of his penis inside of her mouth, her hot tongue swirling around his tip and it quickly became covered in her spittle.
He failed to stifle a loud moan as she brought her head down to the base, easily taking in his entire length again with a loud squelching noise. She repeated this process quickly again and again, his manhood being drenched in her saliva. He could feel her left hand grab his testicles, softly playing and stimulating them. It was clear to Jason that before she was taking her time, allowing him to savor the pleasure of every moment. This time she had a goal, which was to make him ejaculate as quickly as possible.
He glanced down at her, noticing her eyes were half-lidded and watching him, enjoying every second of his reaction. She put the tip of her tongue in his urethra, causing him to grip the bed sheets as he was wracked with pleasure. It was hard to tell over his own moans and the wets sounds of her giving him oral, but he could have sworn he heard her giggle.
He lasted even shorter than he did last time, not even able to form a coherent thought as her mouth worked magic on his genitals. As he approached his climax, he put both his hands around the sides of her head, thrusting into his mouth as he tried to get every inch as far down her throat as he could. He let out a loud groan as he blew his load on the back of her throat and into her stomach, unable to feel anything but the ecstasy overriding his every sense.
He was a little bit worried he would cause her to accidentally choke or something, he had been a bit more forceful than he intended. To his surprise, the only sound he heard from her was gulping, drinking his semen like it was her favorite drink in the world. Soon he felt that his balls were empty, unable to shoot out any more of his baby batter. He let go of her face as every bit of tension left his body, his arms laid to the sides and he relaxed, panting breathlessly.
He heard a wet squishing sound as he felt her remove his cock from her mouth, looking at her to see a wide grin on her face. Her mouth was covered in a bit of saliva, she stuck her tongue out and he noticed it was a bit white from his spooge. She smiled at him as she began to move again, quickly placing her body on top of his.
He watched as she swiftly slid off her pink panties, seeing that it was a bit wet with some sticky substance. Instead of laying horizontally on him like before, she was now sitting on top of him vertically. Her legs wrapped around his and leaning back slightly with her hands on his knees, lining up his still throbbing dick with her vagina and slowly lowering herself.
“Wait, I bought a condom! Let me-” He reached his right arm to the nightstand, trying to grab the condom he left on there. He was interrupted when Diane suddenly leaned forward, grabbing both his arms by the wrist and pinning them down, with more strength than he thought she’d have.
“Nope, don’t need it. It is much better raw.” She said hastily, an excited look on her face as she kept eye contact with him.
He tried to say something else, but his mind went completely blank as pure rapture consumed his every thought. She didn’t hesitate to slip his manhood inside of her, he heard her let out a loud gasp of pleasure and surprise.
“Your...girth and length are perfect, this is...nothing like his.” She said shakily, her voice sounded a bit hoarse and strained, like it was hard for her just to speak.
For Jason, it was better than anything he could possibly imagine, even greater than what was happening before. The inside of her somehow felt even more soft and warm than her mouth, that feeling encompassing the entirety of his penis and he could feel it all around him, he fit inside her perfectly like a glove. It was also somehow even wetter than her mouth, any time he tried to move there was a wet squelching noise.
“This is...I…” Jason tried to speak, but there wasn’t a single adjective he could think of that would be able to describe what he was feeling, his mind was such a mess of sensations and euphoria it was hard to even speak.
His entire body felt mind numbingly hot, so overwhelmed that he couldn’t focus on anything else but her and what was happening. The smell of musk and sweat that filled the room, the sounds of both of their panting, the feeling of his cock twitching inside of her eager to move, it was all making his mind feel hazy. Everything about this just felt so...right, and he wanted more of it.
“Yeah...the first time is...really something special. Even for me this is...spectacular doesn’t do it justice, it’s like my pussy was meant for you. I’m going to start moving now.”
She let go of his hands, placing them on his chest. He could feel her entire body was shaking, every pulse of her heartbeat was almost in sync with his. She slowly lifted up her lower body, until he could just barely see the tip of his cock poking out from her pink lips, before she slammed it back down to the base. She let out another sharp gasp and moaned, her nails scratching his chest a bit, but he was so overwrought with pleasure the pain barely even registered.
Jason couldn’t stop himself from moaning either, feeling that same strong desire to to touch her body. He brought his right hand up to roughly squeeze her breast, pinching her nipple between his finger and thumb like before. He placed his left hand on her inner thigh, his thumb scraping across something hard.
He saw her suddenly open her mouth and close it, hearing something that sounded like a muffled scream. Her hands clenched against his chest as she closed her eyes, her face got extremely red and she even started twitching a bit.
“That’s...my clit.” He heard Diane whisper in a husky voice, like she was trying to concentrate on something.
He looked down at where his thumb was, to try to see what it was he touched. Right at the top of her vagina was a small, circular nub, a bit brighter pink than the rest of her body, and it seemed to be...throbbing a bit? He ran his thumb over it again, eliciting another muffled scream from Diane. He didn’t know much about the female anatomy, other than a penis goes inside a vagina and that’s how babies are made. But he had heard that women have a sensitive spot on them that if stimulated, even just a little, was enough to make them feel a lot of pleasure. It was something men wouldn’t be able to understand since they didn’t have one, but if he had just found Diane’s…
Jason’s lips curled into a small sadistic smirk, this was his chance to tease her back a little.
He placed his thumb on the nub, rubbing it in a clockwise motion to try to stimulate it. He felt her entire body tense up, her eyes opened slightly and her entire face flushed, as she let out a much louder moan than he had heard from her before. Her eyes glazed over a bit as she looked down at him, her mouth slightly open and her hands curled open, scratching deeply into his skin. She began bouncing on his cock again, this time in sync with every circle he made, letting out a loud moan each time.
He tried to time his thrust with hers, but he just couldn’t keep up. Her mouth stayed open and her tongue was lopped out like a dogs, he could feel her hot breath on his face with every moan. It was clear she had completely lost herself to pleasure, giving in to her urges, so lost to her sex drive she didn’t even want to speak. Soon he felt himself becoming the same, briskly becoming addicted to the sensation of thrusting himself inside of her, almost feeling like he was getting deeper each time as her inner walls squeezed his cock and got tighter. Seeing her breast bounce each time and hearing their moans, the sound of their flesh wetly smacking against each other, it became impossible to concentrate on anything else.
He wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, it could have been minutes or even hours. They both ignored the fatigue in their bodies and everything else, focusing only on the cardinal pleasure they were getting. He only noticed a difference when she started to speed up her bouncing, her insides started getting wetter and so did the smacking sounds.
He felt the familiar build up inside of him, the first drops of precum leaking out. He may have indulged himself in his instincts, but the second he felt he was about to cum, he snapped back to his senses. He liked Diane a lot, but he didn’t want to get her pregnant. They were both far too young, and it would have been really bad for both of them.
“Diane, I’m about to cum, and I’m not wearing a condom. I need to pull out!” He said frantically, letting go of her breast and thigh.
He put both of his hands on her slim waist, not surprised that it was just as soft as the rest of her body. As soon as he tried to pull her off of him, her look of blind pleasure turned into a scowl, he heard her make some deep noise from the back of her throat he had never heard a human make before. She forcibly pushed herself back down, the entire length of his cock being swallowed up, threatening to make him lose himself in the pleasure again.
*Did she just...growl at me?*
“No! You’re going to cum inside of me, this is your first time and I want you to experience how amazing that is.” She said aggressively as she pressed her hands down onto his chest, she began bouncing on his dick again, this time faster and rougher than before.
He understood why she would want him to experience that, everything inside of him was telling him to just cum inside her. But he couldn’t do that, he cared about Diane too much to risk ruining her life over a brief moment of pleasure. He tightened his grip slightly around her waist, trying again to pull her off him.
“It’s not worth getting you pregnant! I d-”
“I’m on birth control, don’t worry about it, it’s fine!” She said almost desperately, slamming herself so hard on him that it was starting to hurt a bit.
She didn’t seem like she was lying, and he didn’t want to believe she would lie just for some temporary pleasure. While he knew birth control was not a guarantee, it was high enough to where it might as well have been. Even if he still wanted to protest, it was clear she wasn’t going to let him pull out. And he wasn’t going to be able to force her too, not without hurting her.
Both of their panting got faster and moans got louder the closer he got, every time she got to the base of his member she pulled herself up and pushed herself down faster than before. The buildup was getting so intense and pleasure so overwhelming he couldn’t even think, not even trying to stifle his ever increasing moaning.
“Give me your cum, I need it. Give. It. To. Me!” Diane said needingly, empashing each word with a loud smack of her body against his.
Finally, Jason couldn’t hold back anymore. He grabbed her waist as tightly as he could and pushed her down, thrusting inside of her as hard and as deep as he could. He felt his lower body explode in pleasure as the tip of his cock shot out stream after stream of jizz. He thought after she sucked him dry he wouldn’t have any left, but that didn’t seem to be the case at all. He was almost positive he could actually feel his balls getting smaller as he came inside her, more and more shooting out one after another, a lot more than he ever had before.
They both let out loud shrieks of pleasure, Diane’s nails digging into his chest and drawing a bit of blood, but he didn’t care. Soon there was nothing left in him, having given her everything he had left. Neither of them had any more energy left, she collapsed on top of him, her arms to the side and her head laying on his chest. They were both breathing heavily, their heartbeats a little out of sync and still rapidly beating. His erect penis was still inside of her, he could feel their lower bodies covered in both of their own liquids, the rest of their bodies slick with sweat like they’d just ran a marathon.
Even though he was still inside her, her soft breasts pressing against his bare chest, and he found her extremely attractive, he didn’t feel even an inkling of sexual desire. He had gotten rid of all it when he came inside her, he honestly didn’t think he had anymore in him, and he felt satisfied.
(Sexy stuff over, mostly.)
He remembered her mentioning that she usually preferred to cuddle, and while he had zero experience with that, he was more than willing to try for her. He placed his left hand around her back, pushing her further into him. His left hand went onto her head, as he tried his best to play with her hair, he’d heard that girls liked that too, though he didn’t exactly know the best way to do it.
She flinched and her eyes widened slightly when he touched her, like she was genuinely surprised he did. Then she relaxed as her eyes closed, her lips curling into a pleasant smile as she wrapped her arms under him and around his back, snuggling her head into his chest and pulling him as close to her as she could into a hug.
He couldn’t help but feel this would be better if he were bigger, but she seemed satisfied with what he was doing. Her ear was exactly where his heart was, she seemed to be listening to it, and from the way she was breathing, it was soothing her. He didn’t know if he was doing a good job with her hair or not, but she wasn’t stopping him or saying anything, so he at least wasn’t bothering her.
Jason’s entire body felt warm, but it was a different warmth than before. The feeling of being so close to someone he cared about, hearing their breathing and heartbeat, and trusting each other to be this close with her. Not feeling awkward about not talking because both of them felt comfortable with the silence, no fear of hurting each other or saying anything. He honestly felt that even if he were looking her in the eyes right now, it wouldn’t bother him at all like it usually would.
He was happy, Jason felt genuinely happy.
“I think I can see why you like cuddling so much.” Jason whispered, his voice a bit raspy since he was still very tired, that was probably the most exercise he’d gotten in years.
He heard her lightly chuckle, raising her head slightly and putting her hair behind her ears, then laying her head back down against his chest.
“We just had the best sex of your life, and that’s the first thing you say?”
*Well, it’s the only sex I’ve ever had, so she’s not wrong.*
“What did you expect me to say?” Jason asked as he shifted around a bit, noticing his own heartbeat had mostly settled down.
“I don’t know, something like ‘that was amazing’? Or, ‘are you ready to go again?” While she was obviously joking, he didn’t doubt she had the energy to have more sex if she really wanted to.
“I don’t think I need to say that sex was amazing, we both know it was. And I think I’m done for the night, I can’t do that again, I don’t have the energy you do.”
“Don’t worry, we’ll work on that.” She said with a giggle.
Jason noticed that while most of her body had calmed down, her legs were still shaking a lot, like she was really cold. He couldn’t help but be a bit concerned, while he was also sore, he wasn’t to the point of shaking.
“Are you okay? Your legs are shaking.”
“That’s....I’m ok, it just means you did a good job. You are so absurdly sweet, Jason.” Diane said as she brought her face to his, giving him a peck on the lips and then resting her head back on his chest.
He felt a tingling sensation in his heart, something he only felt with Diane. He wasn’t an expert in romance, but he had a pretty good idea of what it was, he was developing feelings for her. It made a lot of sense, she was his first for a lot of things, and very easily one of the nicest people he’d ever met.
He had to tell her his feelings now while he felt even the slightest bit confident, or he might not get another chance again. He knew there was a very large possibility he was going to get rejected, that’s why he had to do it now, before it turned into anything more.
“Diane, I think I’m starting to develop fee-”
“I have to go.” Diane suddenly said, slowly raising her head off his chest. He let go of her, a little sad that their embrace was already over.
Her hair covered her entire face to where he couldn’t see her, but he somehow felt she had a sad look on her face. Her hands were no longer under him and were pressing against his chest, but he could feel that she was suddenly very tense.
“Are you sure? You ca-”
“I can’t stay the night, my sisters will know something and that might cause more trouble than it’s worth. Believe me, I would love to stay here in each other's arms until we both fell asleep. But, I just…” She stayed silent for a few moments, her body was shaking again, but this time he could tell it was for a different reason. “Can’t.”
Jason could tell there was something she wanted to say, but something was stopping her from saying it. It was also clear she was afraid of something happening, but he wasn’t sure what that would be either.
He’d like to think that it was just a coincidence she cut him off when he was about to confess, but even he knew that would have been wishful thinking.
He flinched slightly as she lifted herself off him, a small squishing noise as his half-erect penis came out of her and started to become flaccid, not unlike a balloon deflating. He felt an urge to stand up and help her when he saw her legs were still shaking as her feet hit the ground, but it didn’t actually seem to impede her moving around at all.
He watched in awkward silence as she walked around his room, picking up the pieces of clothes she tossed aside earlier. Once she had them all gathered, she began to quickly slip them on, taking a bit longer than she did to take them off. When she was done, she walked over to the door, not even sparing him a glance.
“I have to go now, we can talk tomorrow, k?” She said in a solemn tone, opening the door. “And Jason, please don’t fall for someone like me. You...deserve better.”
He opened his mouth and sat up, but he didn’t get the chance to say anything. She walked out and shut the door behind her, he heard her run down the stairs and open the door in the living room and leaving his apartment. Jason was left confused and a bit hurt, had he done something wrong?
He just had one of the best moments of his life, feeling happy and closer to anyone than he’d ever been before, so why did he still feel so far away from her?
Chapter Seven: Magical Mystery.
Waking up smiling wasn’t an experience Jason had ever had before, but like last night, it was a first time experience he enjoyed.
He hadn’t realized how tired he really was until after Diane left, when he got up to clean himself and do the nightly routine he usually did before going to sleep, all the endorphins and adrenaline ran out and his exhaustion hit him at once. His eyelids got heavy and his arms and legs got weak, it was a struggle to brush his teeth.
He had nothing else on his mind but falling asleep, and as soon as he was done and his head hit the pillow, he was out. He didn’t have time to think of much else, but the first thing he thought of when he woke up was the night have passion he spent with Diane before, and he couldn’t help but smile.
Then he felt the soreness, mostly in his lower body, an unpleasant sensation he was going to have to deal with throughout the day.
He rose out of his bed with a sluggish groan, his mouth dry from dehydration and still feeling groggy, but the satisfied smirk was still on his face.
You deserve better.
Diane’s words came to the forefront of his thoughts, lingering like she had just said them. He registered her words when he heard them, but hadn’t had time to think what she meant. She had said that right before he was going to confess, even he could tell that wasn’t a coincidence, she was too smart to not know that. She also seemed to be in a hurry to leave after that, when she was so comfortable before, he really could have stayed like that with her forever.
The words she said bothered him too, the tone she said them in sounded like it hurt her to say.
*Deserve someone better? Does she really think so little of herself? She’s amazing, why can’t she see that?*
He looked over to his nightstand, grabbing the water bottle he placed there last night. He drank from it and noticed the condom he left there that didn’t get used, he opened the drawer and tossed it in there, in case Diane would actually let him put it on next time.
*If there is a next time…*
He eyed his phone that was also left on the nightstand, the only thing left on there. He placed the water bottle back on the nightstand and snatched it, turning it on and not really being surprised he didn’t get any messages, he usually didn’t.
He typed in his password and went to Diane’s contact, his thumb hovering over the keyboard. He had a very strong urge to text her, it didn’t feel right leaving things off like he did, and he was worried about her. Worried about why she suddenly left, and, even if it was just because he was paranoid, finishing inside her made him feel anxious. She said she was on birth control, but he’d heard stories of it not being reliable and a baby happens anyway, he couldn’t help but worry about it.
Then he remembered what she told him about texting her, that she was busy throughout the day and couldn’t respond until later. Messaging her now would not only be pointless, but would just make him worry more. He’d check his phone every other minute hoping she’d respond, she likely never would until later into the day. Jason also knew he would just end up annoying her, coming off as desperate or making her worried about him.
If I want to talk, I’ll talk, I’m very simple like that.
He sighed as he turned off his phone, he wasn’t going to ask her about something that clearly made her upset. He’d leave her alone and text her later that night, if she wanted to talk to him about it, she’d bring it up. He didn’t know how to talk about it at all, if he tried to bring it up, it’d probably just make things worse.
He stood from the bed and stretched, his legs shaking a bit as he tried to ignore the dull soreness in his legs, he could already tell it was going to be a long day.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
That had all happened Saturday, and she hadn’t texted him even once. It made him extremely worried and anxious, even more so than usual. On Sunday he had decided to risk it and text her, she read the message, but hadn’t responded.
He’d like to believe she was just busy, but that wasn’t the case and he knew it. Now it was Monday and he had to go to school, trying to do his best to keep it in the back of his mind. He was going to try texting her again before he went to bed, if she didn’t respond, he would try calling her. He would feel like he was annoying her, but he had to at least try.
And if she didn’t respond to that either, he was going to try to go to the alleyway and hope she was there. If she wasn’t and she kept ignoring him, he’d have to give up, what else could he do?
He went to the library like he usually did during breakfast, this time he felt a bit more peckish than usual and grabbed a bagel. He finished it rather quickly, it was more than enough to get him through until lunch. He was wearing the same hoodie he did yesterday, though he had to wear different jeans for...obvious reasons, at least until he got around to doing laundry.
The real problem was keeping him occupied until then, if he let his thoughts drift, he’d end up worrying about Diane again. He usually spent most of his days just letting his mind drift and thinking about various things, this was the first time in a long time he had to avoid thinking.
Luckily, he had just the thing.
He pulled out his phone and turned it on, swiping until he got to the game section, clicking on an app titled ‘Bejeweled’ with a large blue diamond on it. He rarely downloaded phone games at all, he mainly used his phone to watch videos or scroll through forums. Every now and again though he’d get agonizingly bored and wasn’t in the mood for that, so he downloaded a handful of games he could just play.
Bejewled was the perfect mind numbing game he could just play, it didn’t require enough effort for him to really think about it, but entrancing enough to where it could keep him occupied. It was just the type of game where he had to match similar types of jewels so they vanished, being replaced by others with the main goal being to match as many jewels as possible as quickly as he could. It was a lot like Candy Crush, but signifcantly less complicated. Simple, just like him.
“Wow! You play Bejeweled too! What’s your high score?”
Jason jumped at Pinkie’s sudden voice, he hadn’t even heard her walk up to him, or felt her leaning over his shoulder and looking at him playing Bejeweled. She was wearing makeup now, the only thing he really noticed was there weren’t bags under her eyes, but it was hard to say if that was because she actually got any sleep or her makeup. Her large poofy hair was just barely not touching his face, it might have been his eyes playing tricks on him, but something about her hair was cleaner than usual, almost like she tried to groom it.
*She’s giddier than usual, and she smells really nice, like strawberries. No! Stop smelling her, that’s creepy.*
“Um...I-i think the highest score I’ve ever gotten was around fourty thousand? I’ve been playing for a few years and I’ve gotten sort of good at it.”
Jason tried to avoid eye contact with her, he hadn’t been this close to a girl other than Diane, and it still made him a bit angsty, even if it was Pinkie.
“That’s actually kind of impressive! I play Candy Crush mostly now, but when I stopped playing I think my highest score was somewhere around seventy thousand…..”
She suddenly trailed off as her eyes turned to him, lowering her gaze to a spot on his neck like she saw something. She narrowed her eyes suspiciously as she got closer to him, causing Jason to shirk back uncomfortably. Suddenly her eyes widened and her mouth opened like she was going to gasp, but no sound came out.
“Is that...a hickey?” She asked in a hushed tone, leaning down and cupping her left hand around her mouth, which wasn’t necessary because she was so quiet even he could barely hear her.
Jason blushed furiously as he felt his ears getting warm, he tried to crane his neck to see the spot she was talking about. It was hard, but he could just barely make out some of the skin around his neck was a darker purple than the rest, the exact spot Diane sucked on him two nights ago. He tried to cover it with his hand, beyond embarrassed and surprised he out of all people would have a hickey.
*That explains why she brought up hickeys all the sudden, how did I not notice that when I was brushing my teeth the last few days?*
“...Y-yeah, Diane...gave it to me.” He murmured, so quietly he hoped she hadn’t heard him. He wanted nothing more than to shrink away from her gaze, if he had known he had a hickey, he would have just stayed home! The best he could do now was cover it the best he could and hope nobody noticed.
“In an alleyway? That sounds a little...unsanitary.”
“Um...no, we were...at my apartment.”
As soon as he said that, Pinkie’s entire body tensed up, a serious look on her face that looked almost wrong on her. She opened her mouth to say something, but closed it just as abruptly. She walked around him and pulled out the chair beside him, sitting down in it and scooting closer to him. Her nose was slightly crinkled as her eyebrows furrowed in a scowl, not an expression he thought the ecstatic party planner was capable of.
“Did you guys...you know...do it?”
Despite the grave expression on her face, her question sounded like it came from an elementary schooler. Like she was asking a dirty question that her parents had told her she wasn’t allowed to ask, it was kind of cute in a weird way. If he wasn’t so red faced at the moment, he probably would have smiled.
He couldn’t bring himself to actually say it, anything he’d try to say would just come out as a stutter and he’d feel more embarrassed. Instead he nodded, doing his best to hide behind his hair, wishing he’d grown it out like he debated with himself for years.
The silence only made it worse, he didn’t hear Pinkie make a single sound for what felt like an eternity. He heard the chair creak as Pinkie leaned back, she sighed loudly like she was relieved about something. He looked up to her staring at him, wearing an expression he couldn’t quite discern. She was somewhere between a scowl and a frown, her eyebrows not entirely furrowed and eyes half open. The corners of her mouth were shaking like she couldn’t decide between smiling or frowning, her arms laying on her legs as she twiddeled her thumbs.
She looked....perturbed? Angry? Jason couldn’t tell, and that was somewhat unsettling.
“I...huh, not sure why but I...didn’t expect that, I guess I’m the only one of my friends who’s still a virgin, huh? Other than Fluttershy, anyway.” She awkwardly chuckled, though something about her voice sounded off. It was a bit shaky and she was speaking faster than usual, like she was talking just to talk. “Rarity, Rainbow, and Applejack have had boyfriends, Sunset tried it out of curiosity, and Twilght wanted to experiment with it. I would have eventually after a year or so, but I never got a boyfriend. But I didn’t think...you would, good for you!” Pinkie said as with a sheepish smile.
That smile didn’t look like ones she usually had, it looked fake, almost pained. He was terrible at reading people, but even he could tell that smile was forced. He wasn’t sure why, she was her usual self just a few moments ago. Did him confirming he slept with Diane upset her somehow? Why? It didn’t make any sense to him, if she didn’t want to know, why did she ask?
“Pinkie? Are yo-”
“So how was it?”
He was taken aback by the sudden question, the embarrassment he had momentarily forgotten came back with a burning heat in his face.
“Pinkie! I can’t...talk about that, it’s hard for me to even talk about it in public.” Jason said as he fidgeted in the chair, feeling Pinkie’s curious gaze on him.
“Really? I thought boys loved bragging about having sex with girls! At least, that’s what Limestone told me, that the first thing they do is tell their guy friends about it.”
*I don’t think I want to meet this ‘Limestone’, she doesn’t sound like she’d like me.*
Pinkie’s smile looked a bit less fake and her voice sounded more chipper, but it still felt off, like an imitation of what she was usually like. Her hands were moving around and making gestures in an animated fashion, not with any particular motion like she was just moving them so she had something to do. Her eyes were fully open and her smile wide, but something about it was just lacking the normal energy she had.
To Jason it was evident this was an act, the same kind Diane would put up whenever he asked about something she didn’t want to talk about. This was more severe, her behavior was more erratic and almost desperate, trying to hold back whatever emotion she was actually feeling. He wanted to help her, but he didn’t even understand what was wrong.
“Maybe, but I’m...not like most guys, you know that. I don’t even have any guy friends to brag to, I can barely talk about anything like that with Diane, anyone else is too much. Can we just stop talking about it?”
Jason had his hand on his chest, trying to calm down his heart beat. He looked around to see if anyone had heard them, he would probably die of embarrassment if other people were listening in. Luckily, he and Pinkie were the only ones in there, other than the librarian Cheerilee, who was preoccupied aggressively typing something on a computer and not paying attention to the world around her at all.
“You’re saying...you’re more comfortable with Diane than me?”
The way she asked that made his heart sink, making him feel a kind of pain he’d never experienced before. When he looked back at her, it only made it sting a little more. Her voice was somber and she sounded completely disheartened, she had a frown on her face that was just wrong after being used to seeing her smile. Her half-lidded eyes made her almost look lifeless, her pink skin was even a bit duller and some parts of her hair deflated a bit. Depressed was the first word that came to mind, but it didn’t feel right associating that word with Pinkie Pie of all people.
“No...Pinkie it’s not that, I just have a different relationship with her than you. You and me are friends, while Diane and I are…” Jason offered as he waved his hands, trying his best to cheer her up
*What exactly are we? Frenefits doesn’t quite fit, we’re more than that now.*
“Complicated. Really, really complicated. Plus whenever I talk with Diane we’re always alone, you know how I am with other people.”
Jason realized after Friday he was getting incredibly comfortable with Pinkie, he wasn’t immune to her charisma and her way with people. He rarely stuttered with her anymore and the social anxiety was practically non existent. Except for whenever she asked something like that, there were some things he was very uncomfortable talking about in public, that was one of them.
However, he wasn’t lying when he said his relationship with Diane was different. It wasn’t something he could explain, he just felt so relaxed and open, even when she was teasing him so much. Maybe it was because of Diane’s brash nature, but he just couldn’t be like that with Pinkie. She was just too...different.
“We’re basically alone right now, that shouldn’t change anything.” Pinkie whispered, just barely loud enough to hear, glancing away from him and crossing her arms.
There was a coldness to her tone that almost made it sound like it wasn’t even Pinkie who said it, he was sure she intentionally spoke ust loud enough for him to hear. He wanted to say something, but she didn’t give him the chance. She put her thumb in her mouth like a baby, taking a deep breath and blowing into it like a balloon. There was an audible popping noise as her faintly flattened hair bounced back like it was made of rubber, the color in her skin coming back like it was never gone. She jumped out of her seat with her last breath, her eyes opening wide and her mouth curving into a wide grin as she beamed at Jason.
“I heard you were super good at math from some of my friends in your class, is that true? Please tell me that’s true!”
She suddenly leaned forward, grabbing his hand and placing them in hers like she was begging for his help, she was even batting her eyelashes! He pulled his hands away, sudden physical contact was one of the things that were guaranteed to make him anxious. He darted his eyes back and forth to try to avoid eye contact, already feeling his heartbeat pick up after he just calmed it down.
*Why is she switching topics so abruptly, so she can avoid talking about what we just were?*
“I...yeah, I guess? I usually get A’s and B’s without really studying that much, I wouldn’t say I’m that good at it though.” He looked at her hair and saw that it was completely back to normal, her skin wasn’t dulled anymore and her smile didn’t look pained anymore. She was acting exactly like she usually did, no sign of the distraught she was feeling moments before.
She was able to completely hide her emotions like that and act like she normally did without the slightest chink showing, something about that...disturbed him.
“Why do you ask?” He said hesitantly, noticing a glint of something in her eyes he wasn’t sure if he liked.
“Can you come to my place after school and tutor me a bit?!”
There was an almost desperate tone in her voice, she was practically pleading with him. While Jason was even more taken aback than from earlier, not so much the fact he was being asked to tutor her, more that he was being asked to a girls place!
*I’ve never been to a girls place before, and why is Pinkie inviting me over of all people? Doesn’t her sister Limestone hate guys? It certainly sounds like it. I suppose I shouldn’t be that worried about it, I did just have a girl over to my place not that long ago. But I don’t have any parents or siblings, is it really ok for me to come over like that?*
Pinkie’s eyes narrowed a bit as she stared at him, having an intense look in her eyes like she came across a word she’d never heard before and was trying to figure out how to pronounce it. Her mouth curved into an ‘o’ shape as she realized what he was thinking about, at least what she was pretty sure he was thinking about.
“You won’t have to worry about my parents! They’re usually at work during the day, and even if they come back, they won’t mind! Maud is going to be off at a rock convention for the next few days, Marble rarely comes out of her room, and Limestone won’t bother us as long as I ask her to, probably. We’ll…” She smirked deviously, “Pretty much be alone.”
Jason gulped nervously, he wasn’t quite sure why.
*Be alone with Pinkie? Well, we’d need to be so I can tutor her properly, and it isn’t really that different from when we talk in here. I wasn’t really doing anything anyway, other than anxiously waiting for Diane to text me.*
“I don’t know, Pinkie. I’m not su-”
“Please? Pretty please with a lot of whip cream, gummy bears, sprinkles, caramel sauce, and a cherry on top?” She squealed as she got face to face with him, their noses touching and she was giving him the biggest puppy dog eyes he’s ever seen on a human. “I’ve got a big test tomorrow, and I don’t even know the quadratic formula! I promise I’ll stay still and listen, mostly!”
He couldn’t help but wonder why she was asking him of all people, Pinkie knew a lot of people, surely she knew someone else who was better at math than him. Maybe he was just the first one she asked? He didn’t mind it that much, but he couldn’t help but feel there was some ulterior motive, as absurd as that was considering this was Pinkie.
“...Okay, sure. I can’t stay for more than a few hours, but I-”
“Great! I’ll text you the address later, see you after school, bye!”
Almost faster than he could see, she stood up and zoomed out of the library, leaving smoke in her shape behind her like Friday. It was very sudden and seemed like she just wanted to leave, he checked his phone and saw that there was still ten minutes or so until it was time for the first class, so why was she in such a rush to leave
*Was it something I said? I don’t get it, why’d she get so upset and then happy again? Girls are weird?*
There was a tight knot in his chest, he wasn’t sure why, but he was dreading going there.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Other than trying his best to hide the hickey on his neck, Jason’s day was pretty normal. He didn’t have very much to do school wise this week, so he could be lazy this week if he wanted, other than doing homework and studying like he usually did. He’d have to start looking for a job some time next week, but for now that was a problem for future Jason.
He couldn’t help but keep thinking about the conversation he had with Pinkie earlier, there were so many things about it that threw him off. What did he say that made her upset like that? How did she swing between depressed and happy so easily? Why did she ask him of all people to come to her place and tutor her? Every time he thought he had an answer to any of those questions, it just brought more up.
It had been almost all he could think about throughout his day, at least it had gotten his mind off Diane. Now it was lunchtime, he had eaten a little less than he normally did and went to the library to be alone. Instead of sitting at the tables on the bottom floor like in the mornings, he preferred to go up to the second floor between the ailes of books. He had yet to see a single person go up there, it was comfortable and he had plenty of books to read from if he wanted to.
He was sitting on the floor crouched against one of the shelves, his head leaning against it and his arms laying on the floor. His eyes were closed but he was still conscious, in that weird state of mind where he wasn’t entirely awake but not entirely asleep either.
“Pinkie was right, you are in your own little world.”
Jason, for the second time that day, jumped at the sudden voice. His eyes shot open as he looked for the source of the voice, glad it wasn’t against his ear this time. It wasn’t high pitched like Pinkie’s, it belonged to someone else and sounded familiar.
Sunset Shimmer was standing to the left of him, wearing the same outfit he saw her in before with her hands on her hips, giving him an amused smirk at his reaction.
*What’s she doing here? Did Pinkie send her to find me for something? That doesn’t make any sense, she would have just texted me if she wanted something.*
“Yeah, I...get lost in thought sometimes. How’d you find me?”
“I know...well knewI guess, It’s complicated. Anway, I knew someone who used to come up here a lot, and realized it was a pretty good place for a loner like you.”
She lowered herself and crouched down on the floor beside him, reaching into one of the pockets of her leather jacket and pulling a small box out. She flipped it open and pulled out what looked like a thin cigarette, putting it in her mouth with one hand and holding the box with the other. That’s when he realized, and hoped, that it was a candy cigarette when she bit the top off of it and began chewing.
She glanced at him and saw that he was eyeing the candy cigarette. “ I...used to have a really bad habit of smoking, I’m trying to get over it. I’m not sure how she knew, but she said one of the best ways to get over it was with candy cigarettes, it’s worked so far.”
Sunset pulled the rest of the candy cigarette out of her mouth and held it between her fingers like a real one, putting the box with the rest of them in between them, pulling another one out and offering it to Jason. He hesitantly took it and stuck it in his mouth, nibbling on the end and enjoying the sugary test.
“Huh, I didn’t...peg you as a smoker. So what did you come find me for? Did Pinkie say something?”
Jason was avoiding eye contact with Sunset, he hadn’t been expecting to be talking to anyone during his alone time. He didn’t mind it being Sunset that much, out of all of Pinkie’s friends she was the one that made him the least anxious, but it still bothered him a bit.
“Yeah, but nothing bad.” Sunset said with a roll of her eyes. “She talks about you every now and again, more so than any other boy that I know of. Mostly things like how she thinks it’s cute when you get flustered, or how she wishes she could help you be better with people.”
Jason abruptly stopped chewing, his eyes widening a bit as the realization of Sunset’s words hit him.
*She...thinks I’m cute? Diane’s said the same thing, but I just thought it was because she was teasing me. Is there actually anything about me other girls find attractive?*
He bit off the top half of the candy cigarette, trying his best to hide the red hue on his face.
“I’m...really surprised, I didn’t think there was anything about me that was worth talking about.”
Sunset tossed the rest of the candy in her mouth, he saw out of the corner of his eyes her smirk lower into a frown, her body getting slightly more tense as she hid her eyes behind her hair.
“Hey...how good are you at keeping secrets?”
“I’m…” Jason hesitated in answering, the question was sudden and he wasn’t entirely sure on how to answer. “Not sure, no one’s told me any secrets before. I...can promise I won’t tell anyone if you don’t want me to, I don’t really talk to anyone other than Pinkie and Diane.”
She watched him cautiously, narrowing her eyes and glaring like she was trying to make a decision. She sighed as her body relaxed a bit, reaching into the box and pulling out another candy cigarette.
“I have the ability to see all of your memories, or just specifically whatever ones you’re thinking about, all I have to do is touch you.” Sunset offered casually, as if what she was saying was completely normal.
Jason has experienced a lot of awkward silences, a lot of them coming from his attempts at making a joke, this was one of the worst.
“Is this...supposed to be some kind of joke? I mean, I always kind of believed in telekenisis and stuff like that, but that sounds a bit ludicrous.”
She responded by extending her arm towards him, like she was offering it to him. “Think of something, some memory from your childhood or whatever. Then just touch me and I’ll be able to tell you whatever it is, that should convince you.”
Sunset didn’t even look at him as she spoke, more focused on the candy than him. He was about to ask her more questions, but realized that would have been pointless. He closed his eyes and thought back to seventh grade, thinking of the time he snuck his 3DS into school and played it all day instead of doing classwork.
He ignored the anxiety he got from physical contact and touched her hand, her entire body tensed up the second he did. She didn’t move an inch, he watched in astonishment as white lights shined from her eyes, like there were two flashlights behind them. Her pupils completely vanished, leaving what seemed like just her scelera. Her mouth hung open, but no noise came out.
She suddenly pulled her arm back, her eyes rapidly blinking until her pupils came back and she was back to normal, chewing on the candy cigarette again like nothing had happened.
“That’s the first thing you think of in your childhood? The time you snuck your DS into school? Most people think of a sleepover with their friends or something, I guess you have been anti-social for a while.”
Jason opened his mouth to respond, but closed it as he stopped himself, she was right. He also found it hard to speak after the display he just witnessed, with just one touch she really did see a memory from his childhood. He knew about the possibility of people being able to read minds or hear other peoples thoughts, but seeing their memories? That was something else entirely, how was that even possible?
“Wow...you can really do that? That’s...I’m...how? Some sort of magic or something?”
Sunset shrugged, making a humming noise that sounded something like ‘I don’t know’. “I’m not really sure how it works, or how to explain it, I’ve been trying to figure it out for a while. When it first started I just saw the entirety of someone’s life whenever I touched them, that caused some...problems.” She stopped talking for a moment and shivered, remembering something unpleasant. “I eventually learned how to just see either a recent memory, or whatever memory they’re thinking about.”
She turned her head to face Jason, he was staring at her in astonishment, trying to comprehend what she just did and said.
“You’re not freaking out as much as I thought you would, at least you aren’t showing it.”
The truth was, Jason was freaking out a lot, just internally. He had always considered himself to be open minded, but the revelation that there was a girl who can read minds sitting right beside him was nothing short of mind blowing. He had so many questions he wanted to ask, but he felt if he tried to voice them, he’d end up just asking all of them at once. The only thing preventing him from freaking out externally was his crippling fear of making a fool of himself.
“I’m...compartamentilzing, and also kind of in shock.” He finished the candy cigeratte and grabbed another, in that moment he understood a bit better why Pinkie preferred to be doing something while she was thinking. “Ok...so why are you telling me? We barely know each other and this seems like a big secret to trust someone with, isn’t this something you should be talking with your friends about?”
“They already know, they were the first people to know actually. I think I can trust you, you don’t peg me as someone who would go around telling secrets like this. As for the reason, you’v-
She stopped talking when her phone buzzed, she put the candy cigarette in her mouth and reached into the other pocket and pulled out her phone
*Probably Pinkie and the others wondering where she is.*
He watched in silence as she texted someone, rather quickly turning it off and putting it back in her pocket. “You might not realize it, but you’ve been getting pretty close to Pinkie, closer than almost any other boy I can think of. What I’m about to tell you is another secret, but this one is something only I know about, you might be the only one who can help.”
She had a much more serious expression on her face as she said that, which was a little hard to take seriously with candy sticking out of the corner of her mouth. She brought her other hand up to her temple and began rubbing it, similar to when Jason’s studying something he had a hard time comprehending.
“Pinkie has...gaps in her memories, ones I can’t see and that she keeps playing off.”
There was a concerned and worried tone in her voice, it was a bit shaky and she clearly sounded relieved to finally be able to talk about it with someone. This sounded like something she’d been holding onto for a while, what could it be that she would tell him but not the others.
“Gaps? What do you mean?” Jason asked, hoping for clarification.
“It’s...complicated, I’ve never tried putting it in words, so give me a second.” She pulled her knees to her chest so she was in the fetal position, her chin on the top of her knees. “I can’t even remember when exactly, but a while back Pinkie was talking about how she had a really bad habit of falling asleep when she wasn’t even tired. I didn’t even think much of it at the time, we figured it was just Pinkie being Pinkie.
I accidentally touched her once while she was talking about it, and it’s...more than just that, a lot more. Sometimes she’d wake up in different clothes in a different place, but she just moves past it and pretends it doesn’t happen. There are chunks of her memories missing, there’s no pattern either. Even though the memories belong to her, I couldn’t access them, it was like reaching into a bag for more chips when there aren’t any, but when you shake the bag you can hear them, so you know they’re there. It’s really frustrating and I still don’t understand it.”
She threw her hands up and gave an exasperated sigh, tossing the rest of the cigeratte in her mouth and chewing on it angrily.
*Gaps in her memories? From the way Sunset describes it, it sounds a lot like she’s blacking out.*
“That’s...really serious, but how am I supposed to help?”
“I...have a theory or two on what’s going on, but it’s all just conjecture. I know that you’re going to her place later today, she told us about it. I really hate to ask you to do this, but I need to get a better idea of what’s going on with her, and this is the only way I can think of. If you get the chance, can you...look around her room?”
“Are you....asking me to search through Pinkie’s things?” Jason asked hesitantly, turning his head to look at her. She was hiding her eyes behind her hair, like she was ashamed to look him in the eyes. “Sunset that’s...a complete violation of her privacy, not to mention a betrayal of her trust if she were to find out. I can’t do that!”
“I know, I’m asking a lot.” Sunset responded. “I’m not asking you to take anything, or even touch anything if you can avoid it. Just...if you see anything that’s weird or out of place, even for Pinkie, tell me, that’s all. I don’t want to have to ask this of you, but I know she always cleans her room before we come over, she won’t do that for you since you wouldn’t know what’s different. I just…”
He saw her shaking a bit, taking a deep breathe and exhaling to calm herself down. “She stopped talking about it a few weeks ago and hasn’t brought it up since, which means it either isn’t happening anymore, or she is just choosing not to talk about it because she doesn’t think we can help her. But I need to help her, and all of them if they ever needed it. I can not even put into words how grateful I am and how much I owe them, if I can’t even help a single one of them when they need me, then I’m worse than worthless!”
Jason didn’t know anything about Sunset or her friends, but from the way she was talking, there was something that happened that she felt guilty for, or maybe she asked for help with something? Either way it seemed they had helped her in a way she felt she could never repay, the kind of friendship that was real.
*Can I really do this? I abhore even thinking about betraying Pinkie like that, I’ve never had anyone trust me like she and Diane do. I want to help Pinkie, anyway I can, but this is risky.*
“I...will do it, on one condition.” Jason said as he turned away, grabbing the last candy cigarette from the box. He was starting to get why Pinkie ate so much candy. “If I get caught, I want to tell her everything you told me. If I were to mess up my friendship with her...I don’t think I could ever forgive myself.”
Sunset opened her mouth to respond, being stopped by the sound of the bell, signalling the end of lunch. She chewed the last of the cigarette and slowly stood up, dusting off her jeans and stretching a bit.
“I can agree to that, thank you a lot for this Jason.” She said as she reached down and grabbed the empty box, tossing it back in her jacket pocket. “I have to go now, just...be careful, ok? You aren’t a bad guy Jason, I think I get what Pinkie see’s in you.”
She left without saying another word, leaving Jason sitting on the floor. He wasn’t in any rush to get to class, his next one was right across the hall from the library. Which meant he had plenty of time to contemplate his life decisions, and wonder when things got so complicated.
Chapter 8: A Girly Girl (NSFW)
Pinkie’s house was...bigger than Jason expected.
He knew it’d have to be decently sized, to be able to house Pinkie, her three sisters, and unless her parents were divorced and live separately, both of them. When Pinkie texted him the address, after being initially surprised at how her house was only about a block or so away from his apartment, he double checked to make sure he had everything he’d need and headed over.
It was very easily the biggest house on the street, if not the entire block. It was a relatively suburban neighborhood, the kind you’d see in tv shows; rows of houses a fair distance from each other with enough space in front of it to have a small yard and a driveway for the cars. He was a bit worried he wouldn’t be able to spot her house from the others, since they all looked so similar with only a few distinct differences.
Oh boy, was he wrong.
While most of the houses were about a story tall and only big enough for a small family, The Pie Family’s house was at least three stories tall, more than enough for six people. It looked to be made out of a sturdy dark oakwood, the roof made out of bright white fibre cement pointing upwards. It was perfectly polished and almost seemed like the house was just recently made, it was clearly very well taken care of.
There were a total of six windows, two for each floor, but none of them he could see into due to thick dark curtains on the other side. The door was made out of dark black iron, a small glass window at the top that was hard to see through, and had various swirls and other patterns on it. The doorknob looked like it was made out of pure steel, so clean he could see his reflection in it. Every few feet on the walls was a light attached to it, none of them were on right now, but he had a feeling if they were all turned on at once it would be almost blinding.
*Is her family rich or something? This is more like a miniature mansion than a house!*
He walked up to the door nervously, extremely hesitant to knock. Jason was intimidated, similar to a time when he was younger and he accidentally hit a baseball into the window of someone’s house, somehow he was more anxious now than then. He eventually worked up the courage to knock on the door, still a tinge of fear that by some horrible mistake he had the wrong house.
He felt that his fear had almost become true when he didn’t hear anything for half a minute, or maybe because his knocking was so light and brief it went unnoticed. He was about to double check the address Pinkie sent him and knock again, before what sounded like someone rapidly running down stairs from the inside. The footsteps came to the door and briefly stopped, he could just vaguely see something pink and bouncy through the top window of the door before the doorknob turned, revealing Pinkie Pie on the other side.
“Hiya Jason! You got here quick, I haven’t even had time to get out of my school clothes yet!”
While that was true since she was still in the outfit he always saw her in at school, he doubted that it was because of a lack of time. Jason might have been terrible at noticing small details, but even he could see that she had put on a considerable amount of makeup since he’d last seen her in the library.
There was no sign of the dark bags under her eyes he had only ever seen once, and her cheeks looked rosier than usual. There wasn’t a single blemish or anything on her face at all; it was completely smooth and flawless. Her eyelashes were also longer than usual, it might have been a mistake, but he could have sworn she was batting them at him. She was also wearing dark eyeliner that worked perfectly with her baby blue eyes, which somehow had more life in them and were brighter than usual. Her hair was a bit padded down in some areas as if she had tried to groom it, but it retained most of its curly, bouncy shape to an almost stubborn extent. The smell of strawberries he had picked up from her before was stronger now, and while he quite enjoyed it, it came off a bit more overwhelming than he’d like. To top if all off, she was wearing scarlet red lipstick.
Jason was completely blown away by her appearance, caught completely off guard at how different she was with makeup on and how well she did it. Where did girls even learn how to do stuff like that? However, while she was incredibly more attractive with it on, he’d even go as far as to say downright gorgeous, it still bothered him a bit.
He understood why some girls chose to wear makeup, sometimes they wanted to feel pretty or were fishing for compliments. It wasn’t his place to judge. Even so, he never liked it, preferring that they didn’t wear any. To him it just seemed so...forced ; like they were worried about their looks and cared too much about their appearance. Jason found it difficult to feel attracted to a girl if he felt they were trying too hard, or if they seemed insecure about their actual personality when it came to dating.
Maybe that was another reason he liked Diane so much, anytime they met she wasn’t wearing an ounce of makeup, not even friday night when she came over and they...did what they did. Everything was natural about her, from how she looked to how she acted.
*At least, that’s what I thought. She still hasn’t texted me back.”
Jason shook his head as he tried to avoid thinking about Diane, turning his attention back to Pinkie. “Wow, you look...really good Pinkie, I don’t think I’ve seen you wear so much makeup. What’s the occasion? Are you going somewhere?”
“Just to my room, silly billy.” She said with a playful giggle, gesturing for him to come inside. He flinched a bit at that, trying to ignore how similar she sounded to Diane. “What are you waiting for, come on in! It’s not like we’re going to be studying outside!”
Albeit a tad confused, he obliged and entered her abode, shutting the, surprisingly heavy, door behind him. He didn’t understand why she had put on so much makeup if she wasn’t going anywhere, there’s no way she did that just for him, he had only come over to help her with math.
Right?
He was beginning to suspect there was a bit more to this than just studying. He was about to ask Pinkie about that when he turned around, his words caught in his throat as soon as he did.
Directly in front of him were lavish stairs, covered in a thick red carpet that was cleaner than anything he had in his apartment. To the left of the stairs was the living room, but it was a lot different than any living room he’d seen. The walls were a dull brown, which was jarring to Jason, he had honestly expected her house to be colorful and full of various decorations. In comparison to that, this was actually pretty boring.
What filled the room was three, yes three, different plasma screen TV’s. Sitting on a large TV stand, one sat in the middle while the other two were on both sides of it. They were currently on and playing some cartoon, the TV screens were connected and were showing it all on one screen. He knew that could be done with PC monitors, but not with TV screens!
Also on the TV stand, connected to the TV’s was every game system he knew of, a small aisle of drawers adjacent to it, which he imagined were where the controllers were kept. On both sides of the TV stand were large bookshelves, but it wasn’t books they held. The left one held video game cases, each row being for a different system. The bookshelf on the right held movies, everything from VHS tapes to CD’s.
The only other thing in the room was a very large, and very comfortable looking, black couch on the opposite side of the room. A coffee table in front of it, which had a surprising lack of drinks on it, and a small mini fridge beside it.
*That room probably cost more than an entire years worth of rent for my apartment.*
He turned his gaze to the right, a mixture of fear and curiosity at what luxurious room was there. To his shock, it was the kitchen, and it actually appeared pretty normal. There was one rather large fridge, an oven, a sink, a microwave, and an almost disturbing amount of cabinets and drawers. While he couldn’t see it, he had a gut feeling that there was an abundance of sugar filled snacks.
Strangely enough, he also had a feeling that the fridge was actually only filled with whipped cream.
“Whatcha looking at?” Pinkie asked as she got up in his face, following his line of sight to the kitchen.
Jason found himself to be a bit speechless, the revelation that Pinkie was a rich girl was a bit staggering. “Pinkie...what do your parents do for a living?”
“Rock farming.” She stated in a matter of fact tone, like it was the most obvious fact in the world.
Somehow her response just made him more confused, he raised his eyebrows and waited a few seconds for her to elaborate.
She didn’t.
“Um...you mean they’re geologists?”
She shook her head back and forth and laughed. “No, that’s Maud! She’s very clear about making that distinction! Maud’s a geologist, and my parents are rock farmers!”
Pinkie was very adamant when she told him this, similar to a teacher telling a student the difference between multiplication and division. She wagged her finger back and forth in front of his face almost dismissively.
*I...have several questions, but I feel like asking them would just cause more questions.*
He stood there in silence for a few moments, trying to resist the urge to rub his temples. Before he had time to say anything, she had grabbed him by the hand and began leading him up the stairs.
“That’s enough standing around, come on, I’ll show you my room. The sooner we get done, the sooner we can chillax!”
Usually, someone touching him so suddenly like that would cause a surplus of anxiety. But, either because it had happened so often with her, or just because it was Pinkie Pie, he had become less bothered by it over time. As they walked up the stairs, his nerves began to steady. The less anxious he was, the more he noticed about her hand. Like Diane’s, her hand was very soft, with skin about as smooth as it looked. The distinct difference between hers and Diane’s was that Diane had a certain firmness to her grip, while Pinkie’s was much more gentle; almost like she was afraid of hurting him. Not just that, but other than Friday, Diane’s entire body was always incredibly steady and never shook. While with Pinkie he could see her shaking a bit and her hand was even a bit sweaty. If he didn’t know any better, Jason would say she was nervous.
That didn’t make sense though, what could Pinkie possibly be nervous about?
It didn’t take them very long to reach her room, the hallway they went down only had three rooms he could see. One on the right, the door being a bright pink which was a stark contrast to the dull brown doors. One at the end, which he assumed was the bathroom, and one on the left directly across. Jason didn’t think it’d be a stretch to say the room on the right was Pinkie’s room, it was the one on the left he was a bit more intrigued about.
Other than the vibrant colors, there were no signs or anything on it, he half expected there to be various stickers or something. The door on the left was a dark black, almost scarily so, and reminded him of a chemical tank with how many labels and warnings were on it. Warning signs, caution symbols, a handful of ‘Stay Out’ signs, and one in bold letters that said ‘No Boys allowed.’
Everything about it just screamed ‘Rebellious Teenager’.
“Yeah...That’s Limey’s room, I think she’s in there right now. I didn’t tell her I was bringing anyone over, so just be reeeeeal quiet.” Pinkie said in a hushed tone, emphasizing her point by placing her finger against her lips.
She let go of his hand and opened the door, walking in and gesturing him to follow her. The same anxious feeling he got when he first saw her house sprung back up, but for a significantly different reason. He was reminded that this would be the first time he entered a girls room, which really shouldn’t have made him as apprehensive as it did, especially since he had a girl over to his just a few days ago.
He gulped nervously as he hesitated to walk forward, closing his eyes like he was stepping into a whole new world. The first thing that he noticed was the smell, it hit him as a bit strong and sweet. Kind of like when he would enter the shops of a mall and sometimes he’d enter one with a lot of cologne, but instead of cologne it smelt like candy and flowers.
He slowly opened his eyes, expecting the walls to be blindingly pink. Instead, they were a bright yellow, having patterns of balloons of various colors, mixed in with large, pink hearts. It wasn’t a very large room, probably a little bit larger than his. To the left of the room was a medium sized bed, it had three large pillows with a lot of patterns, the sheets and the blanket on it also had the same heart and balloon patterns as the wall. The headboard was normal except for the top, which was carved out into a heart shape. There was a large curtain like over top that seemed like it extended outwards, though he wasn’t sure how comfortable that actually was.
The only thing on the bed was a somewhat small alligator stuffed animal, it was bright green with small, purple eyes. He wasn’t sure why, but even though it wasn’t alive, its eyes pierced into his very soul. His entire body shuddered when he briefly made eye contact, and he tore his gaze away from the inanimate eyes while he still could.
To the left of the bed was a small shelf attached to the walls, having only a few things on it like a mirror and a toy chest full of fake treasure. Above it were a handful of framed pictures on the wall, some were her with her friends, others were her with people he didn’t recognize. A large, brown sign in the center of it, the words ‘Live, Laugh, Love’ engraved on it in bold white letters. To the right was a small nightstand, a pink lamp and a picture of her with her family sitting on it.
The only things else in the room was a large rug with a sunflower on it, a window to the opposite of the door with pink curtains, and a very large wardrobe against the wall on the right side of the room. The wardrobe was open right now and was filled with various types of clothing, everything from nightwear to dresses he found hard to imagine Pinkie Pie even wearing.
He sort of knew it before, but seeing her room just confirmed it. Pinkie was, in every sense of the term, a girly girl.
“You like my room? It’s been like this since I was twelve, and I love it just as much now as I did then!”
“It’s...unique.” Jason said absentmindedly, looking around the room for a table or something they could study at, but there wasn’t one. “So...are we just going to study on your bed? I don’t see anywhere else.”
“Yuh-huh! My bed’s super comfy and has plenty of space! You can go ahead and get comfy, we miiiiiight be here a bit.” She said with a wink, spinning in a circle several times and then walking towards her wardrobe. “First, I gotta change into something else. Wearing my school clothes after a while gets stuffy!”
She reached into the wardrobe and pulled something out, but her back was turned to him, so he couldn’t see what it was. She placed the clothing over her arm and walked towards the door, hiding the clothing from him so well it almost seemed intentional.
“I’ll be right back, I’m going to go change, I’ll be back in...five minutes or so.” Pinkie said as she shut the door behind herself.
He listened as her footsteps got more distant, then heard the sound of a door opening and closing. He laid his backpack on the ground beside her bed and grabbed the few things he brought to help with the studying. A calculator, a mostly clear note-book with the exception of a handful of doodles he made while he was bored in class, and a math textbook.
It only took him a thirty seconds or so to get it all out, he went quickly, realizing this was the opportunity to look around that Sunset said he might have. His hands shook a bit out of a fear of getting caught and guilt from betraying Pinkie’s trust. He clenched his fist, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. A slight feeling of resolve washed over him that he’d never felt before.
*Pinkie will understand if she catches me. I can explain, this is for her, Sunset and I are just trying to help.*
He started by just looking around the room, seeing if there was anything out of place or that might have shown any distress Pinkie had been suffering from that she was hiding. On the surface, nothing seemed wrong. Actually, to his surprise, the entire room was very neatly and meticulously organized. He didn’t really think that was something she cared about.
Not a single picture was crooked or out of place, all the clothes in the wardrobe were folded or hung in order of colors. The pillows, sheets, and blanket of her bed resembled one of a bed at a five star hotel rather than a personal bedroom. Some part of him expected there to be crumbs or some remnants of snacks, but there was nothing.
After about two minutes of searching around the room and looking under her bed and behind some of the frames, he didn’t actually expect to find anything, and his expectations were met. He wasn’t even sure what it was he was trying to find, her journal maybe? If that was true, he didn’t think he could bring himself to read it. He knew to girls that was an incredibly private thing, and it was forbidden for anyone but them to know what was written in it.
He sighed as his eyes slowly scanned over the room, there was nothing else he could see that he hadn’t already searched. He didn’t hear Pinkie’s footsteps, but he didn’t think he had much time left. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw that the drawer of her night stand was slightly open, he didn’t know how he hadn’t seen that before. Maybe he knocked it open a bit when he was searching around?
Out of a mixture of knowing Pinkie would notice it, and that it bothered him a bit that it was so out of place with everything else in the room, he had an urge to put it back in. He walked over to it and put his hand on the small knob to push it back in, stopping abruptly when he saw something inside.
A pack of cigarettes.
He opened the drawer a bit more to make sure he wasn’t mistaken, and as much as he wanted to be in that moment, he wasn’t. It was small and white, the words ‘Morely’ in a golden sticker on the front. There was also a small, see through lighter sitting beside it, and since he could tell it was half empty, it had clearly been used fairly often and recently.
Jason was tempted to pick it up and check how many had been smoked, but he had a feeling that Pinkie would know somehow, so he just shut it back. But, the damage was already done, he’d already seen it. His mind was running a mile a minute, dozens of thoughts and questions running through his mind.
*Why would Pinkie be smoking? Don’t most people who smoke do it because they have a lot of stress? Or have an addictive personality. Pinkie doesn’t peg me as someone who gets easily addicted, but I’m not exactly the best judge of character, so why?”
Something Sunset Shimmer mentioned in their talk came to mind, about how she used to smoke and that it was Pinkie’s idea to use candy cigarettes as a substitute. It sounded like an idea she’d come up with, but what if it was more than just that? What if Pinkie had done it herself? It was possible she had an on and off addiction to cigarettes, but why? What would have caused her to start?
He didn’t have any more time to think, he heard the sound of the door opening and closing, quickly followed by the far footsteps of Pinkie Pie. He got so nervous he was borderline nauseous, moving to sit on the bed probably faster than he ever had before. He shifted into multiple positions, trying to find one that appeared the most natural. He ended up settling with just sitting on the edge, his legs on the floor and his arms crossed. His right leg was tapping rapidly and he had a strong urge to bite his fingernails, but he resisted the best he could.
As soon as the door opened he put on a strained smile, about to make an awkward joke about her falling in. Luckily, it never left his mouth, as his jaw almost dropped at Pinkie’s outfit.
Her skirt was replaced by pink shorts with blue stripes, they were fairly short and went about five inches up from her knee. He’d never seen them in person before, but she was wearing thigh high socks. They were a dark purple, covering her feet and going up to her knees, leaving only her thighs visible.
The blouse and vest she wore at school was gone, replaced by a single piece of clothing. A bright white, sleeveless t-shirt, it was clean and also a size too short. It clung tightly to her chest, basically the only thing it covered, but not tight enough to see whatever bra she was wearing. Her midriff was completely exposed, her waist was surprisingly slender, all the skin she was showing didn’t have a single blemish and looked as smooth and flawless as her face did. Her belly button was so small it was almost unnoticeable. Her metabolism must have been ridiculously high for her to eat as much as she did and her body still be so perfectly shaped.
Speaking of her chest, her breasts were massive! They must have been covered by all the clothes she wore normally, because right now he could tell they were as big as Diane’s. They were perfectly round, perky, and weren’t sagging in the slightest. He wasn’t sure if that was because of a bra she was wearing, or if they were like that naturally.
He watched in pure shock as she moved with stride over to the wardrobe, placing the clothes she was wearing before in a basket inside. She bent over, showing off her large posterior, he could almost see up the shorts she was wearing from the angle he was at. He quickly turned away, his face flushed as he tried to resist the urge to glance.
He heard her turn around and begin skipping towards him, a bounce in her step he wouldn’t be able to mistake as anyone else. He felt the spot beside him collapse in on itself as she sat down. She turned toward him, but didn’t say anything. She remained eerily silent. He found himself afraid to turn to look at her, knowing he would find it difficult to keep his eyes off her body.
The bed strained slightly as he felt her weight shift, and suddenly he felt hot air blowing into his ear. Shivers went up his spine as he brought his hand up to his ear to stop it. He turned to Pinkie to confirm that she was actually the one doing it, not like it could have been anyone else.
“Sorry, but I’ve always wanted to try that, your reaction was as funny as I thought it’d be!” Pinkie said with a giggle.
Something about her laugh made his heart skip a beat, and he suddenly found it difficult to take his eyes off of her face. Seeing such a blissful and innocent expression on her and knowing that he caused it made him a bit happy.
“As fun as it is to mess with you, we really should get started. I don’t like studying, but I dislike procrastinating even more.”
Pinkie’s voice took on an uncharacteristically serious tone as she reached down to grab a pencil from the pencil case he brought, twirling it in between her fingers in her right hand. She grabbed the notebook on the bed and flipped it open, smirking at one of the doodles she came across, and then flipping again until a clear page.
“Do you mind if we start with factors? They’re what I have the best understanding of, but it’s rough at best.”
They spent the next thirty minutes going over some math problems, Jason calming down rather quickly as he got into it. Doing math had always been soothing to him, as long as it was math he understood, anyway. The process of using numbers and letters helped him to focus his thoughts, maybe that was part of why he was good at it.
Well, he was relatively calmed down, until Pinkie started getting a lot closer than he was entirely okay with.
It wasn’t anything intentional, at least, he was pretty sure it wasn’t. It started as just her hand tracing his whenever she’d point out something, which was easy enough for him to ignore. He wasn’t quite sure when, but as they progressed, she seemed to be getting closer to him, inch by inch. Her soft legs began pressing against him, and her breasts eventually enveloped his arm, leaving a lot of her cleavage visible if he looked at her, nevermind just how his arm felt sandwiched between them. His heart was beating so hard and loud he thought his ribcage was going to crack. His entire face was hot and he was sure his cheeks were red, Jason was sure she noticed, but if she could hear his heartbeat, she didn’t show it.
That wasn’t the only thing that bothered him, it was how easily she was learning. He’d never tutored anyone before, but Pinkie was progressing faster than normal. Sometimes he wouldn’t even say anything, she would skim over a page in the textbook and write down the example problem, solving it perfectly without even saying anything or asking a question. Anytime she did, it was more rhetorical. Like she was explaining how to do something in the form of a question, and he would just nod to confirm it.
She also constantly had that confident, knowing smirk on her face. Never hesitating or slowing down, he barely had to say a single thing or help her at all. It was like he was just a placeholder, she was tutoring herself at this point.
He inhaled deeply as he prepared to ask her something. It was presumptuous, and came at the risk of sounding like an asshole, but it would irk him if he didn’t say something.
“Pinkie, you didn’t actually ask me here to help you with math, did you?”
She stopped whatever she was writing, her lips curving downward into a frown. She didn’t look up at him, her gaze transfixed on the problem she was in the middle of solving. She remained silent for what felt like forever, a tension in the room he normally associated with Diane.
Without a word she laid the pencil down onto the notebook, shifting away from him a bit to where she wasn’t touching him anymore.
“Jason, what do you honestly think of me?”
There was a cold sternness to her voice, her face mostly unable for him to make out as she turned it away from him.
“I....” Jason paused as he tried to collect his thoughts, the question completely blindsiding him. “I think you’re a fantastic girl, you’re so social that you know how to get along with anyone. You can hang out with just about anyone, and yet you still choose to go out of your way to talk with me. You’re really nice. If I’m being honest, you’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”
Everything he was saying was true and what he genuinely felt, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that it was the wrong thing to say. Pinkie’s body slouched down a bit, her hair deflating slightly. There was something sad about her body language now, reminding him of his talk with her earlier that day.
“That wasn’t what I was asking about.”
Her voice was meek and barely more than a whisper, if he hadn’t been so close he wouldn’t have heard it. His jaw tightened as he tried to figure out what to say.
“I-”
(Somewhat sexy stuff starting, skip if you want.)
He was interrupted when she suddenly jumped forward, her lips enveloping his in an instant, his eyes widened out of shock into a bug-eyed expression. The notebook, textbook, and pencil fell off her lap to the ground as she placed her hands against his chest to balance herself.
Jason’s mind had turned into tv static, unable to think or react in any way. He didn’t kiss back or move at all, the pencil he was holding in his hand clattered to the floor. His first thought wasn’t why she was kissing him, or even how he should react.
It was the fact that she tasted exactly how she smelled; like strawberries.
She took advantage of his lack of reaction, pushing him down onto his back against the bed. In a moment she was on top of him, straddling his hips and pushing her body against him. Her kissing was passionate, and yet there wasn’t any lust behind it. It was like she was trying to express what she was feeling the best she could, which was through kissing.
Her hands began to move down his body, getting to the edge of his shirt. Her soft hands about to move under it, reminding him of when Diane touched him like that, bringing him back to his senses. He firmly grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her off of him, their lips breaking contact with a thin trail of saliva between them.
She slowly opened her eyes, having closed them at some point, they were half open and she had a hazy look in them. There was a bit of lust like he’d seen in Diane’s eyes, but there was something else he couldn’t identify.
“W-what...are you doing?”
Jason was out of breath, the sudden make out session leaving him winded. As much as he hated to admit it, he was also aroused, he was sure from the position they were in she noticed. His mind was telling him he shouldn’t be, but with how close she was to him and how scantily dressed she was, it was impossible to stop it.
Her breathing on the other hand was remarkably calm, it almost sounded like she was sleeping. Her body language gave away how she was really feeling though, her entire body shook similarly to how he did in times of extreme social anxiety. The thing was, he couldn’t tell if it was because she was nervous, or afraid.
“Kissing you, obviously.” She said as her voice cracked, shaking a bit like it was hard for her to speak.
“Why? You know Diane and I are-”
“Not together, right? You guys are just friends who have sex, you AREN’T a couple.” Pinkie quickly countered, her emphasis having a bit of snark to it.
Her statement left him conflicted. She had put so much conviction into it, she sounded so sure. Her snide at the end surprised him; it was the closest to being mean that he’s ever heard from her. What she was saying was true, but hearing her say it like that caused a stab of pain to his heart. He broke eye contact with her, not even noticing he was making it with the cauldron of emotions he had.
“It’s...a bit more complicated than that.” He managed to stutter out, something about the way she was looking down at him made him feel small and his throat dry.
“Does she have feelings for you?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head like a dog.
“I don’t know.”
“Do you…” She paused, her jaw tightening for a brief moment. “Have feelings for her?”
Her grip on his shirt tightened, she hid her eyes behind her hair, her voice sounded a bit strained. Jason hesitated in answering, he knew the answer; he’d been thinking about it too much that entire weekend to not. But to say it out loud took more courage than he thought it would, not just that, the situation he was in right now was fragile. He could tell Pinkie was holding back whatever she was feeling for his sake.
Despite that being the case, he had to be honest, honesty was one of the few things he had,
“I...I think so. I don’t have any experience with romance or anything, but I think...I like her.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, he could literally see the dejection hit her like a truck. Her entire body drooped and her hair deflated more than before, parts of it losing its normal puffiness. She slowly lifted her hands off his shirt, holding them tightly against her chest. Since his hands were still on her shoulders, he could feel how violent her shaking had suddenly gotten.
She had hidden her face so well behind her hair he could only see her chin, he heard her make a noise that was somewhere between a sigh and a sob. This was the most upset he had ever seen her, such a drastic change to how unchangingly happy she was any other time, and he couldn’t ignore the stab of guilt that his words were what made her like that.
Before he had the chance to try to comfort her, she suddenly lowered herself to him, wrapping her arms around his back and placing her head on his shoulder. He gasped as her large, pillow like breasts pushed against his chest, her mess of hair poking into his cheek.
“I like you, Jason.”
She whispered the words directly into his ear, her hot breath sending shivers down his spine. She hugged him as tightly as she could, almost desperately so, like she needed to be comforted in that moment.
“W-why?” He managed to say, his mind barely able to think coherently as he tried his best to ignore the urges a certain part of his body was telling him to give in to.
She didn’t say anything for a while, hugging him exactly like that without making a single sound, her hot breath hitting his neck every time she exhaled. She was still shaking, but it was less so than before, he could feel her heart was beating just as erratically as his.
“Because,” She abruptly let go of him, raising her body to where she was straddling him again, placing her hands on his chest to balance herself. There was a smile on her face that was unlike any he’d seen on her before, it was pained, he could detect that sadness behind it. Yet there was also a bit of relief and content, in a way, it was reassuring. Her eyes were more or less the same, though they were still half open and she had that unique light in them that he’d only seen in Pinkie’s eyes.
It made him realize something, that was the most genuine smile he’d ever witnessed from her.
“I don’t...know a lot of guys, not really. Sure, I’m friends with a lot of them, but I’m not close with any of them. Sunset and the others are my closest friends, I’ve tried getting closer to guys but, well, they think I’m weird. Some think I’m friendly in all kinds of ways and I sleep around, others just find it hard to see me as anything else but the girl everyone’s friends with. You’re the first guy who hasn’t straight up told me they aren’t interested, and you aren’t like most people I’ve met. You’re sweet and I know you don’t like it, but your shyness and how flustered you get is cute. I could go on and I’m not even quite sure when, but I started crushing on you. You might not remember, but…”
She fidgeted and shifted around uncomfortably, unintentionally, or maybe intentionally, rubbing against his bulging erection. He stifled a groan by biting his lip, grabbing her by the waist to get her to stop. She moaned slightly at his touch, but otherwise didn’t react at all.
*We really need to get out of this position, I don’t know if I can keep holding myself back like this. She’s so soft and her waist is so slender, what do all these hot girls see in me?*
“I told you about how girls with insecurities would look for guys like you, and I...have a lot of insecurities. It was kind of my way of telling you I was interested, but I guess I shouldn’t have expected you to get something that subtle, that’s my b!” She said with an innocent giggle, shrugging her shoulders and bringing her hands to her chest again. “It...doesn’t help that my friends are so perfect. I’m not beautiful like Rarity or Fluttershy, not smart like Twilight or Sunset, and I don’t have a muscular body or athletics like Applejack and Rainbow Dash. I really don’t have a lot going for me other than I can get along with basically anyone, which is surprisingly lonely in a strange way. But…”
Her face suddenly got flushed as she lowered her hands, grabbing her shirt by its bottom and lifting it over her head before tossing it to the side. She was wearing a dark black bra, they looked a bit tight on her, pressing against her breast and preventing them from sagging. He couldn’t tell if that was because it was a push up bra, or it was just a size too small for her.
The black bra was extremely familiar to him, it was identical to the one he’d seen Diane in, down to the same color and made out of the same material. It didn’t seem weird at first, sure it wasn’t likely for them to own the exact same underwear set, but it wasn’t impossible either. Something was telling him there was more to it than that.
He didn’t get more time to think about it, as right before his eyes her hands went behind her back and undid the latch on the bra, tossing it to the side with the shirt.
Her breast bounced out of them almost eagerly, confirming a question he had been asking himself since she walked in wearing that stupidly small shirt: Yes, her boobs were naturally perky. The first thing he thought of comparing it to were two large, completely inflated balloons. They were round and large, and bounced with each movement she made. Her nipples were fully erect and were a lighter shade of pink than the rest of her body, and would have been hard to notice otherwise.
She now sat on top of him, not wearing anything on the upper part of her body, it’s near perfection being shown in its full glory to him. There wasn’t a single flaw he could see across her body, and the rest of her was likely as soft as her waist. Both of her arms were under her breast holding them up, not like they needed it, her hands fidgeting as she resisted the urge to cover herself with her hands. She was blushing furiously, blinking rapidly and trying to look anywhere but him, clearly embarrassed but enduring it for him.
His hands were shaking, it was taking every ounce of his willpower to keep his hands where they were. He had been so anxious over Diane the past three days that he hadn’t masturbated at all, he was more pent up than he had been in a while, so it just made this entire situation worse. Every throb of his cock felt more intense than the last, almost to the point of agonizing. The only thing that was stopping him from giving in to his libido was the guilt he’d feel for leading Pinkie on and betraying Diane, but that was ebbing away every minute.
“I’m willing to give you everything I am, I’ve wanted to be in a relationship for a long time. I know I’ll probably mess up a lot, but please, I just want one chance. Guys like girls that put out, right? I can do that, I don’t really mind all that much. But, I have next to no experience, so I don’t really know what I’m doing.”
Jason’s mind was working in overdrive, trying to understand everything that was going on, how to react. He desperately resisted the more overwhelming urge by the second to run his hands all over her body like a kid playing with a new action figure trying to find every feature it has. Not only was this the first time a girl was confessing to him, but she was doing it while barely wearing any clothes and on top of him.
Suffice to say, he was struggling to even speak at this point.
“P-Pinkie...I…”
He was interrupted by Pinkie rubbing her lower body against his, eliciting a sharp gasp as he felt just how thin the shorts she was wearing were. She lowered her body once again against his, slipping her hands under his shirt, and tracing her fingers against his skin. She let out a shaky moan as she pressed her bare tits against his chest, he could feel her erect nipples poking him through his shirt.
“You...don’t have to worry about me getting pregnant either, I have endometriosis, and I take birth control to help deal with it. So, it’s like, reeealllyyy hard for me to get preggers. You can...finish in me as much as you want, all I’m asking is that you give me a chance.”
She was trying to sound seductive, but Jason could make out the desperation in her voice. She wasn’t doing this because she was a sexual person, she was doing it because she thought it was the best thing she could think of to try to persuade him, even if she was getting turned on from it.
It made him feel bad, because it was working, he was getting more aroused by the minute and it was making it harder for him to say no. Once again, he was reminded of Diane, specifically when she was telling him about her boyfriend. She said she was only dating him out of desperation to be in a relationship, to be loved and to make someone happy, it was really hard to say no to.
“But...Dian-”
“You have a girl half naked on top of you offering herself, and you’re still thinking about someone who you aren’t even sure has feelings for you?” Pinkie asked, slowly raising her body. Her cheeks were slightly inflated in a pouting expression. “Am I not enough for you? I d-”
*Yeah, I can’t be in this position anymore.*
Out of a desire to get out from under her, and prevent himself from getting any more aroused than he already was, he placed his hands on her shoulders and flipped her over. She didn’t have time to react, and before she knew it she was on her back against the bed with Jason over her.
His face was inches away from hers, his legs firmly on the bed and his hands still firmly on her shoulders, his entire body imbued with mind numbingly warm lust. His pants felt tight against his erect member, everything inside of him was telling him to ravage her. It would be so easy, she was practically begging him to!
But he wasn’t that far gone, he knew while it would have been easy, it also would have been wrong.
(Somewhat sexy stuff over.)
“Pinkie…” Jason said as he took a deep breath, keeping his eyes closed and trying to focus on his breathing. “There’s nothing wrong with you, you’re amazing, really. You have no idea how much it’s taking right now to not give in, you are very attractive and have a great personality, anyone who doesn’t want to get with you is just missing out.”
He wasn’t entirely sure where he was getting all the confidence to say this, any other time he’d be in this position he’d be so wracked with anxiety he’d be stuttering every other word. Maybe it was because his mind was overwhelmed with lust and emotions that it didn’t have room for his usual social anxiety. Or, maybe he was finally getting better, and was breaking out of his loner shell like Diane and Pinkie had been trying to get him to.
*Yeah, right.*
Instead of making her feel better, it actually made her more sad. After recovering from the surprise of Jason’s sudden actions, her lips dropped into a frown, tears forming at the corners of her eyes. “Then...why don’t you want me?”
“If I had met you first...maybe I would have, but I met Diane first. I don’t have any experience with romance at all, probably even less than you. However, doing something with someone else, when I haven’t even gotten to properly confess and know if she reciprocates what I feel for her at all, would be…” He paused as he grit his teeth, trying to think of the best way to put into words what he was thinking and feeling. “Wrong, it would make me feel really bad. What would make me feel worse would be using you as rebound, you deserve better than that, Pinkie.”
“I...don’t mind being used as a rebound, if it’s by you.” She said meekly, so quietly it was more like she was saying it to herself than him.
Something about the way she said that made him upset, he slowly opened his eyes, doing his best to keep his gaze on her face and off her chest. His eyebrows furrowed into a scowl, something he rarely ever did.
“I do. Why do you think so little of yourself?”
She recoiled at his words like she’d been hit, her nose scrunching up and her lips pursing, he was reminded of a dog when it was getting yelled at. She brought her hands up to her face and covered her eyes, he wasn’t sure whether it was because she couldn’t look at him, or if she just didn’t want him to see her cry.
“The s-same reason as you, I just do.”
Her voice was muffled and he could tell she was on the edge of crying, he suddenly found himself glad she was stopping him from seeing her face.
*Great, now I feel like an asshole.*
He let go of her shoulders, raising himself off of her and getting on his feet as he felt the last bits of arousal fade away, driven off by the guilt rising up in him. Without saying a word, he reached down and grabbed the studying supplies he brought, the backpack was left open and on the floor, so it wasn’t difficult to put it back in.
As soon as he put everything in he zipped it up and slung it over his shoulder, sluggishly walking over to the door like a zombie. Pinkie didn’t make a sound, keeping her face hidden beneath her hands except for her quivering lips, biting them like she was trying to stop herself from saying something. She hadn’t moved, her back was still against the bed and her chest exposed, but Jason didn’t think he could get aroused right now if he tried. Her body was shaking again, he had to ignore his urge to comfort her; he was the reason she was on the verge of crying after all.
He was more conflicted in that moment than he thought he ever had been in his life. He wanted to just leave; he hurt her enough and knew what happened here would keep him awake for many nights to come. His words were what caused the damage, and yet he wanted to say more, even if he couldn’t change his feelings.
There was at least one thing he could say.
“I’m sorry, Pinkie.”
That was the final push, he heard her let out a heart wrenching sob, Jason was sure if he turned around right now he’d see the tears she’d been holding back rolling down her cheeks. He opened the door and walked through, closing it behind him.
He was also glad that Pinkie’s room was sound proofed, he wouldn’t have been able to take it if he heard her crying.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
He didn’t walk any faster than he usually did, nor was the distance from his apartment to Pinkie’s house any longer, and yet it was the longest walk home he’d ever experienced in his life.
He couldn’t get her out of his head, how pained her face was when he said he couldn’t reciprocate her feelings, how her voice shook when she was trying her best to not cry in front of him, it hurt to think about it.
He tried to think about anything else, even Diane, but it all somehow came back to Pinkie. By the time he got home, his mind was so focused on what happened with her, how he could have handled things better, and how he missed all the signs before, that he barely even paid attention to the world around him. He unlocked his apartment and walked in, shutting the door behind him but not bothering to latch and lock it like he usually did. He trudged up the stairs to his room, tossing the backpack somewhere on the floor and jumping head first onto his bed. With any luck the sweet embrace of sleep would take him and he’d be able to stop thinking for a while.
Sadly, it never did. His body was tense and he felt uncomfortable in his own clothes, he couldn’t stop thinking about Pinkie. Most of the time it was the guilt that weighed him down, he’d never hurt anyone like he hurt Pinkie. Occasionally, his mind would drift to Pinkie’s body, how surprisingly voluptuous it was and soft her skin felt.
He hated himself for thinking of her like that after what he did, he had no right.
*I hate being human sometimes, I wish I was a dog or something. Then I’d just be getting affection all the time, instead I get to deal with constant counterfactual thinking and social anxiety. Ya-fucking-hoo.*
He wasn’t really sure how long he was on that bed, shifting around into different positions but never getting in one he could relax in. He closed his eyes as hard as he could and did his best to focus on the darkness and pretend he still couldn’t hear Pinkie’s sob or how strained her voice was.
What finally broke him out of his stupor was his phone ringing, it shocked him so much that he had forgotten it was even still in his jean pocket. He shot up out of his bed with a loud gasp, wondering who could have been calling it. It wasn’t Pinkie, he wasn’t even sure if she would ever want to talk to him again after what happened.
The thought that his friendship with Pinkie was over hurt him a lot more than he thought it would.
He harbored a small hope that it was Diane who was calling him, but somehow he doubted that too. He shook his head and promised himself he needed to try to stop asking himself so many questions about every little thing, he may have been paranoid by nature, but he still took it way too far.
He pulled his phone out of his pocket and saw that it was Sunset, and his eyes also widened a bit when he saw it was already eight. She had given him her number after their talk in the library in the hallway, it was a bit awkward since that was the only time he’d given his number to a girl other than Pinkie, but he thought he handled it well. However, he was kind of just expecting her to text him, not call him.
“Hello?” Jason said as he answered the call and brought the phone to his right ear, sitting down onto his bed.
“Jason? Wow, I didn’t recognize your voice for a second, you sound way more normal over the phone. Anyway, how did things go at Pinkie’s?”
He internally debated whether he should tell Sunset what happened, from how things were looking with Diane and Pinkie, Sunset might end up being his only friend. But, he decided not to tell her. At least, not the details. If he said that she confessed, Sunset seemed like the type of girl that would want the details, and he really would have preferred to not do that. He already sort of regretted telling her and the others about his whole situation with Diane, anything else and he didn’t think he’d be able to look her in the eyes the next time they spoke, which was already hard enough for him.
“...Not well. Pinkie...might be really upset at school tomorrow, if she even decides to go. Please, if she doesn’t want to talk about it, don’t ask her.”
“She confessed to you, didn’t she?”
Silence.
“Yeah, I figured as much.” He heard her sigh on the other side of the phone, and then the sound of a door slamming shut. “She’ll bounce back from this, she never stays sad for long. I won’t bother asking you why you didn’t say yes, you have your reasons, and I can tell you’re the type who likes to keep that kind of stuff to himself.”
Jason appreciated Sunset’s words, Pinkie was the social butterfly of the group, but Sunset was much more tactful and gentle. He saw her as the mediator of the group, and he more or less understood why she approached him with Pinkie’s issue. If she brought it up to the group, that would draw a lot more attention to it than Pinkie would be comfortable with, and that would have made things worse.
He was really starting to warm up to Sunset, where had girls like her been his entire life?
“So how did...searching her room go? You didn’t go rifling through her panty drawer or anything, did you?” Sunset asked with a playful chuckle, he could make out the distinct crunching noise of her chewing on candy cigarettes.
He blushed a bit at her words, but knew it was nothing more than a joke. “Of course not, I stayed away from her clothes and checked everything else. I didn’t get caught, I’m pretty sure she didn’t notice. I didn’t find anything unusual, until…” He paused as he asked himself if he should mention the pack of cigarettes he saw, that was Pinkie’s business if she smoked and it might have meant nothing.
Even so, it might have also meant something important, and Sunset was likely the only person he could talk to that would know.
“I checked the drawer of her nightstand, there was a pack of cigarettes in there and a lighter, I’m pretty sure it was at least half empty.”
He heard her sharply inhale, the sound of her dropping something and whispering ‘shit’ under her breath. A few moments of tense silence passed as he didn’t say anything.
“Are you sure?” She asked in a hushed tone, like she was in a crowd of people and didn’t want any of them to hear what they were talking about.
“Yeah, I am. I’m just as surprised about it as you are, actually, you’re probably more shocked since you’ve known her longer. Has she ever smoked before?”
“Never! At least, not as far as I’m aware. And I should know, I used to...look into her and the other girls for stuff like that, when I was going through something. Either she just recently picked it up, or she’s been doing it for years and has hidden it from all of us, that would explain why she knew using candy cigarettes as a substitute for smoking would help get over them.”
There was no sound coming from the other side to indicate it, but he could vividly picture Sunset rubbing her temple right now with her other hand while nervously chewing on a candy cigarette and wearing a detective’s hat. He couldn’t help but smirk at the image of Sunset in a large trench coat and with five o’ clock shadow, busting down doors and interrogating people for answers.
Diane and Pinkie were both good and bad influences on him, never before would he have been thinking about something so silly during such a serious situation.
“Thanks for telling me this Jason, who knows how long this would have gone on otherwise. I’ll...try to talk to her about it the next time we’re alone, without indicating you were involved the best I can. But Pinkie’s a lot smarter than most people think, she’ll probably figure it out.”
*I sure hope not, if what happened earlier didn’t end our friendship, her finding out I betrayed her trust and searched her room while she wasn’t there probably will. Maybe I should have just stayed full loner and not interacted with anyone.*
The more he thought about it, the more he realized that Sunset was probably right. Pinkie gives off this impression of a giddy airhead that doesn’t really pay attention to much, but anyone who really knew her would know that wasn’t the case at all. She was very perceptive and, from what he gathered in the little time they spent actually doing math, a very quick learner. All Sunset would have to do was bring up that she knew about the cigarettes, and it would take her all of maybe five minutes to put the pieces together.
“Hey, so…you mentioned that you used to look into people? I won’t ask about that, but…” This was kind of a long shot, but it was his best chance at learning more about her. “Do you...know anything about Diane?”
He heard her stop chewing on the candy in her mouth, she was so silent for so long he had to look at his phone to make sure she hadn’t hung up.
“Yeah...I met her once, actually. A while back ago I was trying my best to makre sure I got as many votes as possible for The Fall Formal, something like prom where they elect a princess, what I wanted to be. I heard about her from someone else and kept showing up at...raves until she did, if that’s the last time I ever see her, it’d be too soon.”
He detected a bit of animosity in her voice, which sounded wrong coming from Sunset.
“Why? What was she like?”
“She was…” Sunset’s voice was shakier than before, she drew a sharp breathe before speaking. “Dodgy, and quite frankly, she scared me. She was disturbingly good at controlling the conversation, always finding a way to answer a question without really answering it, and directing it back at me somehow.
She...knew things about me I have no idea how she learned, even seemed like she was analyzing me as we talked. She was so cold and emotionaless, at times I wondered if she even felt anything at all. When you brought her up at the lunch table, I wondered for a long time whether it was even the same person, your description of her was nothing like the Diane that I met.”
He couldn’t exactly blame Sunset, he knew Diane could come off that way sometimes, but he wasn’t sure if he’d go as far to say she was scare. She scared him sometimes, sure, but he thought that was just because of his terrible social skills.
*Did Diane act differently around other people? Why, what is she trying to hide? Does she act normally around me? Or...is it just another mask?*
“I was intimidated, yeah, but I wasn’t actually scared until...I brought up Pinkie. I pointed out how they were identical to each other, and could have been sisters. As soon as that remark left my mouth, it’s like all the music and the dancing stopped, and there was nothing but her .” She paused, silent again for a few moments. “Ever since I came to this wo-to this school, I was kind of a bully, but I was never afraid of being physically hurt, not until I said that. The things she said to me...she mixed together so many curse words and slurs I think a sailor would have blushed.
She was strong too, in an instant she picked me up by the collar and lifted me off the ground like I was a toy, I was so shocked I could barely fight back. The second she was done with me and my feet hit the ground I was gone, I haven’t stepped into a night club or anything since, she’s one of the few people I’ve ever met that scared me. That was pretty close to two years ago, and I still think about it sometime. I guess she’s cooled down since then if what you’ve said is true.”
It was hard for Jason to even imagine Diane getting violent with someone, he’d seen her anger before...but enough to get violent? The Diane he met wouldn’t do something like that, not even when Pinkie was brought up, she must have been a whole different person then.
*I wonder if that was before or after what happened with her boyfriend, if I had to guess, she changed after she had to go to the hospitial because of her alcohol poisoning. *
The strength part didn’t exactly surprise him either, while she had a very attractive frame, it wasn’t a small one. He noticed the muscles she had, while they weren’t the kind an athlete would have, they were enough to where he didn’t doubt she could pick up someone like Sunset. He was curious about how she got that way, everything he learned about her just brought up more questions.
“I’m...sorry that happened between you guys, I’ll talk to her about it the next time I see her.”
*Whenever that will be, she’s left me on read for almost three days now.*
“Did you learn anything else about her? I knew that she didn’t like Pinkie, but I didn’t realize it had been for that long.”
“I did...yeah, it’s complicated. I was scared of her, but I was also really motivated to win The Fall Formal. I won’t deny that I was also curious, Pinkie was as much of a sweetheart then as now, I was baffled by what could have happened between them that would cause that. I asked around, and…”
He heard the sound of a door opening and closing again, a sink turning on and water running for a moment before being turned off again.
“Everyone at the school knew Pinkie, but despite her claiming she went to that school, only the people who went clubbing at night knew Diane. Anyone who knew her knew better than to ask about Pinkie with her, she avoided not only talking about her, but even going to the same places she did. I never learned why, but all I can say is…
No one’s ever seen Pinkie and Diane in the same place at the same time.”
Something about the way she said that resonated with Jason, making him think about all the connections between Pinkie and Diane he knew about. He was tempted to tell Sunset everything he knew about Diane so far, but that would include some of the things he told her he wouldn’t tell others.
He was concerned about her, but he didn’t think telling other people stuff about her was ultimately worth the risk.
“Back to the drawer, was there anything else in there? She only has one night stand, and that’s where she keeps her spare phone. Was it not there?” Sunset asked, the apprehension in her voice from before was gone.
“Her spare phone?” He asked curiously, something about that statement got his heart racing.
“Yeah, most people don’t know it, but Pinkie is actually the super cautious type. Instead of selling her old phone when she buys a new one like most people, she keeps it somewhere as a backup, though I doubt it will ever get used. I’ve never seen her so much as drop her phone, breaking it is just straight up out of the question. It’s probably been in there so long it’s started gathering dust. I stumbled across it once in there when I was looking for something, I thought it was weird and I asked her about it later.”
‘Can’t tell you, it’s a secret, all girls gotta have a few secrets.’
Diane’s words echoed like she had just said them. He shot up out of the bed, his eyes widening out of realization, remembering that there was no spare phone in there. What could that mean? Only Pinkie should have had access to it, but he knew she was still using the same phone she always did, so why?
‘So don’t give my number out to anyone, k?’
He began pacing around the room as he remembered the things she said, the gears in his mind working faster than they ever had before. He felt like the main character in a mystery novel near the end, when they had an epiphany and began to piece together all the evidence and discover who the culprit was and what really happened. He remembered noting that Diane was a quick texter, the kind that would suggest she texted a lot of people. The only other person he knew who was like that was Pinkie.
‘Pinkie is a...sensitive subject for me. So just...don’t ask me about it, k?’
‘I can’t even imagine who or where I’d be without my sisters or my friends, they’re everything to me.’
‘I don’t mean to make you worry about all my problems, I just get worried about my friends. Just be careful, k?’
Everything was starting to make sense, all the mysteries and questions he’d been asking himself were being answered and connected with each other, something his unconscious had been working on in the background ever since everything started. It was all starting to make sense.
Why they looked so similar.
Why both claimed to go to the same school, yet Pinkie had never seen her before.
Why Diane thought social media would be bad for her.
Why they used some of the same phrases.
Why Pinkie was wearing a black bra that was eerily similar to the one Diane sent him a picture of.
It was an absurd, and absolutely ridiculous conclusion. Something straight out of a cartoon TV show, or some random, edgy fanfiction. If he said it to anyone else, he’d sound crazy! But…
*It...makes sense, too much sense! It explains everything, way better than anything else I can think of.*
“Jason?” Sunset asked, her voice sounded distant with how deep in thought Jason was, he hadn’t even noticed how erratic and loud his breathing had gotten.
No, this wasn’t something he was just now realizing, he had known about this for a while now. It had been staring him in the face ever since he first talked to Pinkie, he just didn’t want to see it because of how ludicrous it was. He kept pushing it to the back of his mind, searching and hoping for any other kind of answer, but there wasn’t one. Everything he learned kept pointing to the same thing, the phone was just the last sign he needed to where he couldn’t ignore it anymore.
He heard an almost audible click as the last piece of the puzzle fit in, the truth he could deny no longer dawning on him.
“I have to go.”
“Wa-”
He hung up on Sunset without hesitation, putting his phone in his pocket and running out the door as fast as he could. He needed to hurry and get there, if he didn’t talk to her tonight…
He might not be able to fix this.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Averagely, it would take him about thirty minutes to get to the alleyway. Now with him running, which he only ever did when he had to during gym or something, it would be more like fifteen.
He didn’t care if he got there early and she wasn’t there, if that was the case he would wait, until midnight if he had to. He needed to talk to her tonight, he couldn’t wait until any other day. His anxiety and fear would be too much for even him, and he didn’t think he’d be able to pull out the confidence like he had in that moment again.
The second he saw the entrance to the alleyway he slowed down and stopped himself, more exhausted and breathing heavier than he was sure he ever had in his life. At that moment, he didn’t care.
He looked into the alleyway, finding the exact girl he was searching for.
She was in the same position she was in when they first met; sitting on the ground with her back against the wall and her knees to her chest, her long, straight hair blocking most of her face. She was wearing the same small, white sleeveless t-shirt he’d seen her in earlier. The same pink shorts and purple thigh highs, even wearing the same pink furry slippers he saw her in the first time they met.
Her hair wasn’t covering as much of her face as usual, however. He could see some of it, and the bits he could see made him sadder than he was expecting it to. Her eyeliner was running from the crying she had been doing, her lipstick smeared like she’d been eating food with a lot of ketchup.
Even from where he was standing he could see she was shaking, whether that was because it was cold out and she wasn’t wearing a lot of clothing, or something else, he didn’t know. Her lips were moving wordlessly as she silently sobbed, though it didn’t appear anymore tears were coming out.
He took a few steps forward, giving away his presence to her, he didn’t exactly try to be quiet with his breathing. She tensed up as soon as she heard him, raising her head and half opening her eyes to look at him through her hair, he suddenly felt like prey that had just been spotted by a predator.
He gulped as they made eye contact, but she didn’t say anything or make a single move. For once, Jason broke the silence out of more than just because it was awkward, he broke it because he was concerned, and afraid.
“Diane, are you...Pinkie?”
He wanted her to laugh.
Laugh like she always had before when he was being awkward, or was making some terrible attempt at a joke, or at least give him that usual smirk she always had. For her to tell him he was being an idiot and ask him how he got such a silly idea in his head, while patting the spot beside her and gesturing for him to sit down so they could talk. To let that small part of him that didn’t want to believe it, that it was just a coincidence that she was wearing the same clothes as Pinkie was earlier that day, have a small glimmer of hope.
But reality was cruel, because that wasn’t what happened at all.
Instead, Diane slowly stood up, resembling a zombie in the old black and white horror movies more than a person. She trudged toward him, her head hung low and her hair covering most of her face. He couldn’t bring himself to speak, anytime he tried to say anything it caught in his throat, unable to leave his lips out of fear he would say something stupid or make things worse.
She stopped right in front of him, still hiding her face behind her hair. With her right hand, she reached down and grabbed his, interlocking her fingers with Jason’s. Any other time his heart would have fluttered at the intimate contact with the girl he liked, but this wasn’t any other time. Her hand shook like a leaf, her grip on his hand so tight it was like she was holding onto it for life itself, it was only through sheer willpower he ignored the pain it caused him at the surprising amount of strength she had.
“Take me to your apartment.”
It was only one sentence, and was so meek and muffled he barely even heard it, but it carried a lot of meaning behind it. There was so much sorrow behind her words, he could tell it was taking everything she had not to fall apart right in front of him. He decided against saying anything or asking any questions, he didn’t want to see her breakdown, certainly not on the streets in the middle of the night.
In absolute silence, they walked back to Jason’s apartment, neither making any kind of sound on their way there. Her grip got looser, but he already knew his hand was going to be bruised. Her shaking calmed down also, only slightly noticeable and more likely because of what she was wearing and how cold it was out.
As soon as they made it inside the front door of his apartment building, he heard her let out a huge relieved sigh; Jason guessed it was because the manager always kept the inside warm. He guided her up to his room, walking in and shutting the door behind him, while using his free hand to flip a switch on the wall and turn the lights on.
When the lights flickered on, he felt Diane whimper like a wounded animal as she let go of his hand, not saying a word as she walked into his bathroom and locked the door behind her. He found himself missing her touch, even if she was shaking and sad; any physical contact with her at all was enjoyable for him.
He trudged over to his bed and sat down on it, hearing the sound of the sink turning on from the bathroom and assuming she was washing the ruined makeup off of her face. He had taken the hint and didn't ask anything through the door, giving her the time and space she likely needed. Out of all the times to push her, now would be the worst.
He felt his phone vibrating again for the umpteenth time in the past half hour. Like the previous ones, it was quickly followed by the sound of a handful of text messages with a short reprise of silence, then followed by another call. He pulled it out of his pocket and declined the call, already knowing they were all from Sunset.
‘Busy with something really important right now, tell you what I can tomorrow.’
He sent her that text message and typed it faster than he ever had before, powering it off and leaving it face down on his nightstand. He waited patiently on his bed, his elbows propped on his knees and his hands laced and hovering in front of his face. Normally, in situations like this, where a girl was in his bathroom, he’d be riddled with anxiety and beyond nervous. Even in this context, he should at least be filled with a sense of dread, or something akin to it.
Instead, he just felt...nothing, not even able to form a thought as he sat on his bed. He listened intently to the sound of the water coming from the faucet in the bathroom, so focused on it he wasn’t even sure how much time had passed until it stopped. His body tensed up when he heard the click of the door unlocking and opening. Diane stood on the other side, her face completely clear of makeup and her hair mostly behind her ears.
She had a blank expression on her face, staring at him for a few seconds before walking through the bathroom door and shutting it behind her. His heart skipped a bit at her natural beauty, he had forgotten how pretty her face was, even though it hadn’t actually been that long since they’d seen each other.
*Just a few hours, if she really is Pinkie.*
She sat down on the spot beside him on the bed, plopping down without even glancing at him, her eyes staring off into the distance like she was deep in thought. Jason opened his mouth to say something, but closed it just as quickly, wondering if saying anything might make it worse.
“Diane...are you ok?”
She flinched as soon as he spoke, he couldn’t tell if it was because he spoke at all, or if it was because of something else. She lowered her head, once again hiding her face behind her hair as her ears failed to hold it back. It vaguely reminded him of a child hiding behind their parent whenever there was a stranger.
They remained like that for the longest five minutes of his life, somehow managing to be more tense and awkward than any other silence he’d ever been in. He didn’t want to say anything more out of fear of making her upset. It may have been unfair, but he kept waiting for her to take the next step. Every now and again, he would hear her sharply draw a breath as if she was about to say something, her hands gripping the edges of the bed. Then, her hands would slacken, and she’d go back to staying silent.
Jason pulled out all the courage he had left, taking a deep breath and resting his hand on hers. She tensed up at his touch, startled by how sudden it was, but she didn’t pull it back.
“Diane, I’-”
He was interrupted by her suddenly pouncing on him, pushing him against his bed on his back. This action quickly took him back to the first time this had happened to him earlier in the day. However, instead of suddenly being kissed, she buried her head into his chest, bringing her arms under his back and wrapping them around it.
“Jason, please...hold me. Hold me like you did Friday night. I...really need it right now.”
He’d never heard her sound so shaken before, he could feel her hands gripping the back of his shirt, his chest getting a bit wet where her face pressed against it. He laid there in shock, his heartbeat was erratic as his arms hovered cautiously over her. He bit his lip nervously, lowering his left hand on her back and pushed her further into his chest, his right hand gently lowering to rest on the back of her head as he began to play with her hair, imitating the way he held her that night the best he could.
He closed his eyes and pushed away every thought he had, pretending like nothing that had happened that day was weighing on his mind. He concentrated on the warmth of her frame as it was pressed against him; how soft she was beneath his touch. This was something he had only ever had with Diane, an intimacy that he scarcely imagined before they had met. Every breath brough the intoxicating smell of her hair to his nostrils.
All his worries and anxiety slowly ebbed away, his body relaxing for what felt like the first time since Friday. He no longer thought about anything that happened. Right now, he was holding the girl he had feelings for in his arms, and he was happy.
He heard her let out a relieved sigh as she relaxed in his arms, just barely hearing her murmur something that sounded like ‘thank you’ under her breath. He didn’t know how long they laid there in each other's embrace. As time went on he fell into that strange mental state somewhere between consciousness and sleep. Jason found himself forgetting all of his problems and worries, so enamored with this state of peace nothing else mattered.
“It all started...a few years ago.”
He was snapped out of the trance by her abrupt wobbly words, opening his eyes and lowering his gaze to look at her. Diane had shifted her head to the left slightly. The top part of her face was still covered, but he could make out her chin and mouth, curved downward in a stern frown.
“I won’t go into the details, but...there was a large rift caused between Pinkie and her friends in middle school, it wasn’t until somewhat recently things were fixed between them. During that time though, she didn’t want to show it, but she was hurting really badly from the whole experience. She did her best to ignore it, to push down and repress all the pain she was feeling, and I guess that’s how I...manifested, I guess is the term?”
Diane let out an awkward chuckle, meant to hide the uncertainty in her voice. She stayed silent as she glanced up at Jason, watching and waiting for his reaction. Jason remained quiet as he watched her, he didn’t want to say anything out of risk she would lose her confidence to continue speaking, he knew what that was like all too well.
“I…’wake up’ whenever she’s really upset about something or is feeling any particularly strong negative emotion, sometimes even overthinking is enough. It happens in an instant, the only noticeable change is that whenever I’m in control, our hair goes completely straight and won’t go back to normal. She usually thinks that she just fell asleep, and wakes up without remembering any of it. She doesn’t have access to any of my memories, but I remember all of hers. That’s how I know everything she does, but she doesn’t know anything about me, it’s really complicated and I don’t really understand it. I guess in a way, you could say I’m all her pain personified.”
A wave of agony reverberated in his chest at her words, there was so much emotional anguish in those last few words she spoke, it wasn’t like anything he’d heard before. He clenched his fist for a moment, making his grip on her a bit tighter than he intended, luckily she didn’t seem to notice.
“The first time it happened, I was really confused and didn’t understand what was going on, I still thought I was Pinkie at the time. It happened while Pinkie was taking a walk, so I ended up just wandering around until I got into a club. While I wasn’t exactly ‘Pinkie’, I still had all her emotions, and was feeling really...really bad, after a while I was looking for anything I could to distract myself from it. I didn’t have my phone on me, so I...ended up wandering into a bar, I’m not really sure what I was thinking at the time. It wasn’t the type of stuff Pinkie ever did before, maybe I just wanted to try something new?”
She gave a weak shrug before continuing.
“When I walked in, it was like entering a whole new world! People were there that even Pinkie had never met before, and apparently a lot of guys liked the long, straight hair look. I think I got hit on more that night than Pinkie had in the last few months. I was an early bloomer, so back then I looked a lot like I do now, but I was still only fifteen. They couldn’t serve me alcohol, and I couldn’t ask for it out of risk or revealing how old I actually was, but it was...nice being treated like someone else, to be someone other than Pinkie. I decided to start using the name ‘Diane’. It's Pinkie’s middle name and no one but her family knows that. Plus it sounded mature, which was apparently the vibe I gave off, so it was the personality I decided to take on. Diane: The mature, sexy woman who’s mysterious and doesn’t take shit from anybody, and spends all her time partying. If only I had known how badly things would spiral out of control after that.”
She held back a choked sob, hiding her face in his shirt. He rubbed her back as affectionately and gently as he could, cursing himself for not being able to do more.
“It’s...ok Diane, take your time. I know this can’t be easy for you.”
She sniffled and cleared her throat, her grasp on his shirt loosened ever so slightly.
“I had to deal with more than just the emotions she didn’t want, I also had to deal with her overwhelmingly strong urge to make people happy. I didn’t know how to do that, especially not with the life that I’d established. After a bit I...couldn’t cope with the pressure, and started drinking...and smoking. I k-know, I know , I shouldn’t have, I really shouldn’t have. Even if I was in control, it was still Pinkie’s body! I permanently damaged her health, and I’m the reason she smokes, even if she doesn’t know it. I can’t even tell her how sorry I am! I’m sorry, I’m...so, so sorry.”
She sobbed again as she muttered those same words, Jason held her as close to him as he could, but nothing he did seemed to help.
“Diane, it isn’t your fault, it’s okay. I-”
“IT’S NOT OKAY!” She suddenly exclaimed loudly.
She raised her body upward, putting her hands against the bed to prop herself up on and knocking both of Jason’s hands away. She raised her head to look at him, her hair still covering half her face, but he could discern the scowl she was making, the tears at the corners of her eyes she was struggling to hold back.
“It’s...not...okay.” She mumbled, her elbows shaking and eventually giving out as she collapsed on top of him again, burying her face in his chest.
He waited before hesitantly resting his hands on her again, as soon as he made contact she let out a heart wrenching sob. All he knew how to do was comfort her. He had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from speaking. He wanted to say something, to be able to tell her it would be alright and to help her. But he knew that, more than likely, he would just make things worse.
All he could was what he’d always done; listen.
“Then I...met Randal, my ex.” She whispered, using his shirt to wipe off the tears. Typically that would have really bothered him, but considering the situation, he decided to excuse it. “He...took advantage of me, but not in the way you think. He saw through my act, he could tell how insecure I really was, for once I thought...I thought I found someone who understood me.”
There was a brief pause as he heard her sniffle, somehow burying her head deeper into his chest. He had stopped playing with her hair, resting his hand on her head as he listened intently to each word.
“I told you that I got with him and had sex with him because I wanted to feel useful, and while I wasn’t lying, it wasn’t the entire truth either. I had this deep urge from Pinkie to make people happy, and letting him use me like that to make him happy, even if it was just one person, it was enough! I...I...”
Her words came out slurred as she struggled to speak, her right hand came up to her chest and clutched it where her heart would be. Her breathing was becoming more erratic and she shuddered as she tried to suppress her sobs.
He hated this, being helpless and unable to help her was a feeling he’d never experienced before, and hopefully never would again.
“I let him take Pinkie’s virginity, all because of my selfishness! I know Pinkie told you she basically couldn’t get pregnant, but I still shouldn’t have done that, or any of the things I did! I love Pinkie, I really do, but at the same time...I get really mad at her sometimes. Every time she gets upset or hurt I have to deal with it! All her problems and how she really feels about things, because she can’t be honest, because she’s afraid! Even so, she doesn’t deserve what I’ve been doing to her body either, It’s not fair!”
She practically spat the last words, a mixture and anger and sadness in her voice. Diane did her best to hide her face behind her hair, squeezing her mouth shut so no sound would come out, but it only muffled her mewls of pain.
“Diane, you don’t need to feel so bad for it, really. Pinkie would understand, she-”
“And how would you know?” Diane asked coldy, a hint of spite in her voice, but he didn’t think it was towards him.
She raised herself upwards, straddling his hips and sitting on top of him. Any other time this happened Jason would have been very aroused by it, this? The way her eyebrows were knitted, how she intensely stared at him; the way the tips of her lips quivered and tears ran down her face? He felt anything but pleasure form this sight.
“I...who am I Jason? Am I Diane, the emotional wreck of a party girl who’s so desperate to make people happy and to be cared about, she’d even use her body to do it? Or am I just Pinkie, her need to stay happy all the time so strong that she’d rather repress everything than deal with it? Am I just...cursed to not be happy? Do you have any idea what that’s like? Constantly feeling like shit , and everything I do to try to make myself feel better just makes it worse! I…”
She raised both of her hands, looking down and sneering at them. She brought them up to her face, putting them over her eyes as if to try to forcefully stop the tears.
“I don’t know what I am! Am I a person? Do I even deserve to be happy? What am I? Do any of the emotions I feel even belong to me? I’ve asked myself every single day who I am, but I never get an answer! I don’t know! I don’t know, I don’t know!”
She repeated it to herself loudly like some kind of mantra, shaking her head back and forth. Jason reacted before thinking about it, raising the upper part of his body so his face was inches from her own. He gently pressed his hands against hers, which was hard because he couldn’t stop himself from trembling. Her shaking stopped for a brief moment, her hands receded from her face as she made eye contact with him.
Her eyes were half open, blurred from the tears that were still running down her face. Her cheeks were soaked with them, her nose was slightly running and most of her face was red. As he looked into her eyes, he didn’t feel the slightest bit of anxiety or fear. Instead, he admired that even though she was crying, she was still so beautiful to him.
She gave the best warm smile she could, letting out something between a chuckle and a hiccup. She tried to wipe the tears off her face, but didn’t do a very good job of it. “I’m...really s-sorry you have to see me cry like this, I can’t imagine how ugly I must look. But…” She grabbed both of his hands, gently pulling them off her face and laying them on his lap.
She broke eye contact with him, her smile breaking into a frown as she hung her head. He noticed that her shaking hadn’t stopped at all, neither did her erratic breathing and heartbeat.
“I was hoping you’d never have to find out. I was...thinking since Friday how to tell you we couldn’t be together. I didn’t want to get attached to you, to anyone, because of my situation. I don’t even know if…” She paused, once again bringing her hand to her chest, clenching it where her heart would be. “My feelings for you are real, or even if they belong to me, and aren’t Pinkie’s. I’m…”
She hesitated in speaking, whatever she was trying to say caught in her throat. He hated that those words filled with such sadness sparked joy in his heart, he hated even more that he had to make a conscious effort to not smile.
“beyond flattered that you picked me over Pinkie even though you didn’t know if I felt the same way or not, that’s the kind of thing that would win over any girl's heart. I wish you had met Pinkie first, maybe then it wouldn’t have hurt so much to see you kiss her.”
She tried to hide how hurt she really was when she said that, but they were too close together and she was already too far gone to conceal it. Jason felt his heart sink at her words, his eyes downcast with a doleful look on his face. If Diane had access to Pinkie’s memories, that meant she had seen everything that had happened.
He wanted to apologize and say he shouldn’t have let things go as far as they did, but he knew now was not the time or place.
“Jason, I’m so glad I met you, I can’t express how thankful I am. But...I wish you hadn’t fallen for me, and I really wish Pinkie hadn’t fallen for you too. What she feels for you is real, and she deserves to be happy. So, please, just forget all about me and get with Pinkie. After all, I’m…”
She slowly raised her head, as soon as Jason could see her face, he could almost hear the sound of his heart cracking. Diane was trying her best to hide her pain behind a smile, to mask the agony behind her words. She could barely even open her eyes, the corners of her lips quivered, her distress was etched on her face despite her best efforts to hide it.
“I’m just a coping mechanism, I’m not a real person. I c-”
He moved before he even had the chance to think, embracing her in the tightest hug he could manage, his head rested on her shoulder as his hands wrapped around her back. He ignored the miniscule feeling of arousal he got at her supple breasts pressing against him and the intoxicating smell of her hair. He pushed down all his emotions except for his desire to help the girl he had feelings for.
He couldn’t hear her talk with her voice filled with so much pain, or watch her try to hide her despair anymore; he’d break down himself if this continued. He squeezed his eyes shut to prevent just that, making a conscious effort to not hug her too tightly out of fear of hurting her.
“Please, stop. I can’t hear anymore.”
“B-but...I’m not-
“You’re real to me!” Jason shouted, louder and more sternly than he ever had before. He had to make sure she knew he was serious, but he couldn’t keep his voice from sounding brittle.
He heard her gasp and her shaking abruptly stopped, he felt her left hand grab him by the shoulder tightly. He wanted to pull back and look at her, to see the expression she was wearing and look her in the eyes, but he knew he couldn’t. If he did that he’d lose his resolve, and he wouldn’t be able to say the words he wanted to.
“Do you have any idea...how much I missed you? It might have only been two days, but it felt like forever. You didn’t text me back or respond to my calls. I...really thought I messed up somewhere, that my shitty communication skills finally pushed you away. I know this may come off as a little insensitive, but...I’m relieved that that’s not it. I’m sorry that you had to see what happened between Pinkie and I, but I meant everything I said, I…” He paused as he nervously gulped, this would technically be the first time he confessed to a girl, sort of. “Like you, I really do. Pinkie’s amazing, but I don’t want her, not like I want you. You do deserve to be happy, and I know I’m probably the worst option since I have zero experience with romance, but I want to be the one to do that. I have feelings for you, not Pinkie. If that isn’t enough proof that you’re a real person, then I don’t know what is.”
He hated to admit it, but there was still some part of him that was expecting her to turn him down. Even though he heard her say that she had feelings for him also, it was almost too good to be true.
He waited with bated breath, the room quieter than he was sure it’d ever been, the only sound was their out of sync heavy breathing.
“You...really mean it? You missed me? And you’re...sure you have feelings for me, not Pinkie?”
“Diane, you should know by now, I’m kind of a terrible liar.”
She brought her other hand to his back and gripped tightly, lowering her head and pressing it into his shoulder.
“Jason, can you promise me something?”
“Anything.”
She deeply inhaled and exhaled, her breathing shaky. “I’m about to cry, like, really cry. And it’s going to be ugly, and gross. I don’t want you to see me like that, so can you just...not look at me until I’m done?”
He had to resist the urge to laugh, he wasn’t quite sure why.
“Of course.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, her entire body dropped as he let herself fall into him, wrapping her small hands around him as tightly as she could as she began to bawl into his shoulder. He winced slightly as he tried to ignore the pain from her nails digging into his skin, telling himself it was nothing compared to the pain she’d been carrying for years.
Jason couldn’t even begin to comprehend what that must have been like, to wander aimlessly wondering if you’re even a person, having to indulge in partying and drinking to cope. There were still a lot of things about her situation he didn’t understand and wanted to ask about, but he understood now wasn’t the time. This was the first time she’d ever talked about it with someone, she was expecting him to completely turn her down and pick Pinkie, him accepting and choosing her must have been a shock she genuinely wasn’t expecting.
*Here I thought my problems were bad, seeing Diane’s situation makes me feel a lot better about my own.*
With each rise and fall of her body, half of them being followed by a muffled sob into his shoulder, Jason could tell a subtle change occurring. Diane was crying, but it was not only out of pain. There was relief, too. Relief that she wasn’t going to be abandoned, that to someone else, she mattered. Relief that someone else saw her as a person, something she’d been convinced wasn’t true for the longest time. Her crying, in a strange way, made him feel a bit satisfied. It let him know that he said the right things. For once, he hadn’t completely messed something up with his words.
Sometime during her crying, they had gone back to the position they were in before; Jason laying on his back against the bed with her resting on his chest. Her arms were underneath him and holding him tightly with her head still burrowed into his shoulder, drenching his shirt with her tears.
He lost track of how long they stayed like that, his own feelings of fear and despair ebbing away as he allowed her to expel all the anguish she’d been holding inside. Soon each sob was quieter than the last, the time between each one grew shorter and her trembling eventually settled down into nothing. He didn’t notice that it had stopped until there was no sound in the room at all, the silence becoming near deafening. Jason was only distracted from it by her soothing, almost serene breathing. He would have mistaken her for being asleep, except when he placed his hand on her head and his other on her back she flinched. He began to mindlessly play with her hair, he was fairly sure she was done, which left his mind blank as he didn’t quite know what to do now, he was more or less running on gut feelings and intuition at this point.
“Do you...feel better?” his voice came out more hoarse than he intended.
She shifted around on top of him, lowering her body and placing her ear on his chest where his heart was. She nodded her head.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Diane responded with an exasperated sigh. “No...but I need to. There’s not much left to talk about, I’ve told you everything that’s happened to me. You’re the only person that knows the truth. While my sisters are suspicious of why Pinkie randomly disappears at night, they don’t actually know.” Her voice was croaky from all the crying she’d done, it cracked slightly when she spoke.
He internally listed off all the questions he had left, which were actually a lot less than he previously thought. Most of them were just about how the whole ‘switching personalities’ thing worked, but there was one thing that had been bugging him since Friday night, which became the most prominent question he wanted to ask.
“Was...Pinkie telling the truth about the whole endometriosis thing? Can she really not get pregnant?”
Diane let out a chortle that came from the back of her throat, which resulted in her coughing and then trying to clear her throat. “You just witnessed a girl have a complete breakdown, and you’re worried about her being pregnant? Seriously, I can’t tell where your priorities are.”
She paused as she brought her right hand out from under his back, placing it on his chest beside her head. She almost absent-mindedly began sensually stroking it up and down his chest like she was massaging him. He let out a sharp gasp at the sudden touch, enjoying the pleasant sensation more than he thought he would.
“Pinkie doesn’t lie often, unless it’s to herself. Yes, she has endometriosis. It’s painful at times, but it essentially means it’s very hard for this body to get pregnant. On top of her taking birth control to help regulate her periods, the chances of you getting me...us pregnant are astronomically low. You’d have a better chance at winning the lottery, five times in a row.”
Despite the snide tone in her voice, her words were a huge solace to him, he let out a breath he’d been holding in as soon as he asked it. “That’s...really good, actually. Diane, I-”
“You’re still calling me Diane. Even now that you know I’m Pinkie, or at least something created by her, yet you still call me by that name.” She interrupted.
While a bit tight, her voice carried no emotion, coming out more like an observation than anything else. Before he had the chance to respond, she lifted her entire body, bringing her head to his and resting her large breasts on his chest where her head was just a moment ago.
She took a second to tuck her hair behind her ears, showing her face for the first time since she let everything out. Her cheeks were dry from the tears she shed, most of her face was slightly hued, but she had stopped crying. There was a light in her eyes he usually associated with Pinkie. A smirk was stretched across her face, the happiest smile he’d ever seen from her.
It was genuinely the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen, he felt like time itself had stopped, leaving him completely stunned and unable to do anything but stare.
“You’re so sweet you give any of the candy Pinkie eats a bad name. You’re smart, cute, and so innocent. You know all my problems, you’ve seen the bad in me, and you still want me. You see me as a person. You had Pinkie literally half naked on top of you, and said no for me.”
Diane briefly shook her head.
“Nope, I’m not sharing you, I’m keeping you all to myself.”
She spoke in a fruity voice, his heart skipped a beat as his lips parted, the meaning behind what she was saying taking a few seconds to register.
“Are you saying-”
She closed the distance between them in an instant, shutting her eyes and capturing his lips. They were as soft and supple as he remembered them being, the distinct difference between her kiss and Pinkie’s making itself known with the evident taste of bubblegum.
It was passionate, but unlike any other time they’d swapped saliva, there was no lust. It was intimate and made his heart feel like it was going to beat straight through his ribcage. A strange mixture of electric shock and numbingly warm heat began to spread through his body as soon as they made contact, but it wasn’t arousal like he typically associated it with.
It was deeper than that, it was pure, real joy.
Before he had time to kiss back or even close his eyes, she pulled back, their lips breaking as she opened her eyes to peer into his. He flinched as she brought both her hands to his face and cupped his cheeks, snapping him back to reality.
“Yes, dummy, I want to be with you. More than frenefits, I want us to be together . You don’t have to worry about dating experience, my last ‘relationships’ wasn’t exactly romantic, so-”
She didn’t get to finish as he kissed her for once, wrapping his arms around her and bringing her as close to him as possible. Diane was so surprised by the sudden action she didn’t even kiss back, her eyes widening and staring back at him.
Just as quickly, he stopped kissing her, his face inches away from hers, but still holding her body as close to his as he could. “That makes me really happy Diane, more than you could imagine.”
He felt her rest her head on his shoulder, nestling her face into his neck.
“I’m warning you, I’m a handful. I’m needy and kind of a huge smart ass, and as you already know, a major tease. I’m also kind of an attention whore and want you to make me your first priority, I don’t care if you talk to other girls though, I’m not the jealous type.”
“That’s fine. You have to put up with my terrible communication skills, and I don’t really talk to anyone other than Pinkie, so I’d say it’s a fair trade off.”
Her body suddenly coiled up as she placed her hands on his shoulders, her head receding from the comfort of his neck to face him again. The jovial grin was gone, replaced with a much more stern, grave expression.
“I’m serious, Jason. I can’t be there for you all the time, I’ve only ever taken over during the night when Pinkie’s alone with her thoughts, and that isn’t even very consistent. If you’re in trouble or you need me, I hate to say it...but I might not be able to help you, no matter how much I might want to. I can’t forcibly take over, it doesn’t work like that. Pinkie has to be emotionally vulnerable, and not want to be ‘Pinkie’ anymore.”
The near emotional ecstasy Jason was experiencing began to fade away as the weight of the situation set in, while he didn’t let go of her, his grip loosened as his smile too began to falter.
“What happens...if Pinkie becomes aware of you?”
“I think…” Diane paused and tilted her heat to the side, contemplating his question and pondering for an answer. “Some part of her knows, just not consciously. Which is why she never went to her friends about it, they might figure out the truth, and that part of her that knows doesn’t want that. If she were to be told and forced to confront it however, I don’t really know what would happen. Maybe nothing would happen at all, or maybe…” She paused again as her voice took on a somber, almost dreadful tone, hery eyes glancing to the side as she broke eye contact. “I’d disappear.”
Her voice was taut and soft spoken, a brooding expression on her face that showed she didn’t like thinking about that possibility anymore than he did. The fact that such a thing was even probable made his chest hurt, he held her as close to him as he could to try to console her.
“I don’t want you to disappear.” Jason said meekly.
A hollow chuckle escaped her lips, her eyes focusing on a spot on his shoulder, almost like she was refusing to look at him. “I don’t want to disappear either, silly. Hopefully, the day will never come where we’ll have to know. If it does, let’s hope I’m wrong.”
She removed her left hand from his chest and placed it on his shoulder, the same location she had her head in and was crying just a few minutes ago. “I’m sorry about your shirt, it’s stained with tears and snot now.”
*She’s changing the subject again. I’ll let her, nothing good will come out of talking about that anyway.*
“ It’s no big deal, I have other shirts.”
“I’m sor-”
On nothing more than an impulse, he brought his right hand up and lightly tapped her nose, his lips curved into a smile as she gasped.
“Boop.” He mumbled sheepishly.
“That...didn’t feel good.” She said in a snarky tone, pouting and glaring at him.
“I don’t think it’s supposed to.”
She loudly harrumphed as she playfully smacked him on the chest, he couldn’t help but chuckle at how cute she was.
“For real though, I apologize for what happened with Pinkie today. I knew she was going to confess at some point, but I didn’t think she’d do it so...boldly. I’m actually kind of surprised you resisted her, that must have been hard for you.”
*There’s an erection joke in there somewhere, but my mind isn’t far enough gone to actually make it.*
“It wasn’t, really. Self control has always been an important thing to me, it helped that I had you in mind the entire time.” He paused as he expected a feeling of embarrassment to come over him when he said that, but surprisingly, nothing did. Maybe now that everything was out in the open, it was easier to say stuff like that?
“Is...Pinkie going to be ok?”
Her eyes met his again briefly, before she closed them, a pained frown was the only give away to what she was feeling.
“I know it isn’t your fault, you did the best you could. Even so, she’s hurt, badly. She won’t be going to school tomorrow, she’s taking the day off. It’s...hard for me to ignore all the negative feelings, the only reason why is because…” A light blush came on her face. “I’m with you.”
“Do I…” He nervously gulped, that ‘butterflies in your stomach’ feeling coming back with a strong vengeance. “Make you happy, Diane?”
Her eyes opened in a bug-eyed expression, her face getting noticeably redder as she tried to stutter out a response, it was the first time he’d ever seen her embarrassed. “I guess.” she murmured to herself, turning her head away from him.
*Oh my god, she’s so fucking adorable sometimes.*
He had to resist the urge to smother her in affection, settling instead for grabbing her chin with his hand. “You make me happy too.” He whispered as he kissed her, she fell into it in an instant.
That raging arousal he’d been doing his best to suppress made itself very known, unable to be held back anymore as he was reminded how little clothing she was wearing and how close they were. His right hand slowly moved up her body, he reached her breast and gave it a light squeeze, feeling that she hadn’t bothered to put a bra back on.
As soon as he touched her soft mounds, she grabbed his hand, breaking the kiss just as swiftly. He opened his eyes, a mixture of shock and disappointment. Diane’s breathing was erratic and her hand was shaking, he could tell she was aroused, he was familiar with all the telltale signs.
Which only made him further confused.
“I’m...sorry Jason, but I can’t, not tonight. It…” She paused, glancing away from him as if she was trying to think of the right words. “Would feel wrong.”
He lowered both of his hands, a blot of shame building up in his stomach like a pit. She was completely right. He might have been absurdly pent up and missed her more than anything, but that wasn’t an excuse. If he had sex with her when she was emotionally vulnerable like that, he’d never forgive himself.
“Yeah, you’re right, what was I thinking?” He wanted to wrap his arms around her again, but he knew it would be forced and uncomfortable. He lowered his head, trying to avoid eye contact with her. “I won’t try that again. Please, at least stay the night. I want to fall asleep with you in my arms, I don’t think I’ve ever felt as good as I did Friday night.”
He saw her wince, fidgeting uncomfortably as she placed her hand on top of his. “I want to, you have no idea how badly I want to, almost more than anything. But…” There was a desperation in her voice that reminded him of the first time they met. “Limestone heard Pinkie crying earlier, but she didn’t barge in and probably just assumed that she cried herself to sleep. As soon as it’s morning, I already know she’s going to grill her for everything. So if she comes in and I’m not there...it’d be bad. Tomorrow, I promise I’ll stay the night, I’ll make it happen.”
“Oh…” Jason couldn’t hide the dejection from his voice, even if he was also excited that she would be staying the night tomorrow. He’d never had a problem with patience before, but this was something he didn’t want to have to wait for.
“I’ll make it up to you.” She said in a sing-song voice, a playful energy shining through.
He was intrigued by that and raised his head to look at her. She leaned forward with a mischievous smirk he was all too familiar with.
“You want to know Pinkie’s darkest secret?” Diane said in a hushed tone, almost like Pinkie was in the room and she was trying to speak so she wouldn't hear her, which wasn’t entirely false.
“Um…” He was completely taken back by the shift in conversation, but he couldn’t deny his curiosity either. He didn’t want to invade her privacy, but he trusted Diane. If she was offering to tell him, it couldn’t have been that bad. “Yes…?”
“She goes to comic cons.”
Jason’s eyebrows raised at the revelation, something so unexpected, and yet so unsurprising.
“Like, anime conventions and stuff?”
“Yeah, Pinkie’s a total weeb. That’s not surprising though, pretty much anyone who knows Pinkie could tell you that. I don’t quite get it either, but she doesn’t want anyone to know how dedicated she actually is to it, it’s such a strange thing to be embarrassed about. She goes to conventions like that every year, making some excuse about where she’s really going. That isn’t the juicy part though, the real tea I’m spilling is…”
She glanced to both sides of her like she was making sure no one else was around, even though they were completely alone in his room. She gestured for him to get closer, he obliged and leaned his ear down to her mouth.
Which she then promptly blew hot air in, he should have expected that.
He recoiled as shivers sent down his spine, his cheeks a bit rosy, he was almost ashamed of falling for that.
“That really is fun to do!” She said with a playful chuckle, smiling at him smugly. “Seriously though, she buys costumes and dresses up as her favorite anime characters.”
He drew a mental line in his mind as he connected what she was saying, only one thing coming to mind.
“Pinkie cosplay’s?”
“Pinkie cosplay’s.”
Jason didn’t binge anime like a lot of guys his age, but he dabbled every now and again. He was pretty familiar with cosplaying, having come across a few people who made realistic costumes of their favorite characters.
He’d never admit this to anyone, but some of the ones where it was real life girls dressing up as anime characters always...interested him. He wouldn’t go as far as to say he had a fetish for it, but it definitely turned him on a lot more than most things did.
“Here’s the thing: She is obsessed with dressing up as anime girls with pink hair, because she feels like she could pull it off better than most people. While she can, there’s one character she got the costume for that she couldn’t quite pull off because she couldn’t style her hair properly. However,-”
She puffed out her chest almost proudly, placing her hand on the center of it like she was about to brag about something. “-I can. So, tomorrow, while you’re at school, I’m going to put it on for you and send you pictures. Mainly because this particular costume...leaves little to the imagination, I think you’ll find it quite...enticing. I don’t want to tell you who it is though, that’ll spoil the surprise.”
“Can I…” Jason nervously gulped, incredibly interested in the idea of Diane cosplaying for him, what did he do to deserve such an amazing girl? His mind reeled through the list of anime characters he knew with pink hair and wore revealing outfits, sadly, that was a very large criteria. “Get a hint?
“Hmmm.” she hummed to herself as she brought her finger to her chin thoughtfully. He immediately recognized that devious gleam in her eyes. “Sure. The character has long, pink hair. They wear a very tight body suit a lot of the time, and is basically what made the anime popular.”
Her eyes scanned the room as she spoke, not looking for anything in particular. As soon as her gaze landed on his nightstand, specifically, on the small clock above it, she froze. She hadn’t noticed it before, but it appeared old and likely came with the apartment. Her teasing demeanor vanished, replaced with an alarmed one, reminding him of those intros in some Slice of Life anime where the character realizes they’re late for class.
“It’s past midnight already?! I have to go!” She hopped off of him and out of bed, glancing back at Jason hesitantly. “I swear, we can talk more tomorrow. The later it is the harder it’s going to be to get back in.”
He wanted to tell her to stay, to be selfish and beg her to stay the night. But, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He simply wasn’t a selfish person, no matter how much he wanted to be sometimes. He watched as she made her way to the door and opened it.
“Hey Jason?” She said, her back still facing him.
“Y-yeah?”
She turned her head to face him, beaming with the widest, toothiest grin he’d ever seen from her.
“I missed you too.”
He was left speechless, staring as she urgently walked down the stairs and shut the bedroom door behind her. A few seconds later he heard the distant sound of his apartment door opening and closing.
He was so happy in that moment that nothing could ruin his mood. He collapsed onto his bed, finally allowing his body to fully relax. Without any more worries on his mind, and after all the adrenaline and endorphins burned out, he finally fell into the sweet embrace of sleep.
Chapter Ten: Party Of Two, Part One.
Like usual, Jason woke up just a few minutes before his alarm, making him ask himself once again why he even bothered setting it. Then he reminded himself that the reason that happened at all was likely because he set the alarm and his anxiety is what caused him to wake up before it. If he stopped he wouldn’t worry about oversleeping, which is more than likely what was preventing him from oversleeping in the first place.
*Moments like these make me hate being human.*
He sluggishly raised up from his bed with a groan, still somewhat groggy from his sleep and having a strong desire to use the bathroom. He got off the bed toward the bathroom and grabbed his phone on the way there. Before it could ring in the next few minutes he turned off its alarm. With a tired grumble Jason shut the bathroom door behind him and unbuttoned his pants, sighing as he relieved himself.
Cautiously, he thumbed through his text messages with one hand. Unsurprisingly, Sunset had tried to call him and sent him a few more text messages before abruptly stopping somewhere around midnight. She sent him everything from ‘What happened?’ to ‘Pinkie just told us she won’t be going to school tomorrow and everyone’s worried, can you please tell me what’s going on?’
He admittedly felt guilty that he didn’t bother to respond to her for so long and left her anxious like that, but Diane took priority, and he didn’t want to risk being interrupted last night. Jason wanted to message her everything that happened, but he was honestly still organizing all the information in his head. Some parts of last night he understood and others he was still working out. He wasn’t even sure what parts of that information he was allowed to tell Sunset, if any of it.
As he continued scrolling through his notifications, buttoning his pants back up with his free hand, he saw that Diane had texted him about an hour after she had left. He washed his hands and walked out of the bathroom, sitting back down on his bed as he read it.
‘Leave your apartment unlocked when you leave for school. I’m going to leave a present for you, and I don’t want to have to break in to do it.’’
“That’s...a bit passive-aggressive, but ok?” Jason mumbled to himself.
He remembered Diane mentioning before that crime basically didn’t exist in this town because it was so small and everyone knew each other. After living here just a few weeks, he didn’t doubt it as everytime he watched the news it was absurdly boring and no crime was mentioned at all. He even checked the UCR out of mild curiosity and it confirmed what everything else was saying: crime here was practically non-existent.
Plus, knowing Diane, her present was going to undoubtedly be something sexual. With how pent up he still was after everything yesterday, it was making it hard for him to say no.
‘Alright, I will. I usually get home around four-ish, you should have plenty of time to set up whatever it is you want to give me.’
He sent her the text and was just going to turn off his phone before getting ready for school when a new message from her almost immediately popped up. Had she gotten any sleep at all?
‘Thanks! I promise you’re going to like it. ;)’
There was a very small voice in his head telling him to just skip school and stay home and watch TV all day while he waited for her, and as tempting as that was, his fear that he might miss something really important on the day he was absent was much louder. His immune system was naturally strong so he rarely got sick and, as of this very moment, he had a perfect attendance record. He wasn’t going to break that just because of his libido.
But then again...
After another moment he finally put his phone back into his pocket and sighed before standing up to prepare for school.
**********************************************************************************************
Nothing about him walking through the hallways to the library was any different than usual, but Jason couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.
He had this irrational fear in the back of his head that everyone in the school knew that he had turned down Pinkie and that’s why she hadn’t shown up to school that day. He was afraid that other students in the hallway would glare at him or her close friends would confront him about it. He knew that the only ones who were aware that she confessed to him were Sunset and Pinkie, and he doubted either of them would go around telling anyone.
*But that’s how fear is: Irrational and illogical, and makes me feel stupid for even having it.*
He let out a relieved sigh when he sat down at the table in the library like he always did. The only other person in there was the Librarian Cheerilee, who was hiding her head beneath her arms like she was taking a nap, a bottle of water and a smaller bottle of aspirin beside her.
If he hadn’t gotten well over eight hours of sleep last night, he would have loved to take a nap too. But, right now, even if he was tired, he probably wouldn’t be able to sleep. With a concoction of his typical anxiety, the guilt he felt with having made Pinkie cry because of how poorly he handled things, and the excitement for whatever Diane had waiting for him, it would be impossible.
Instead, he laid his head down and placed his arms on the table similar to Cheerilee, closing his eyes and focusing on organizing his thoughts. Diane gave him all the answers he needed, it was just the issue of understanding them that he struggled with. The fact that he had met a girl who could essentially read minds was life altering enough, but now he was dating a girl who was actually the second personality of another girl? It was astonishing how hectic his life had gotten in just two short weeks of moving.
*Dating...that’s what we are, right? We both confessed and said we have feelings for each other, and she had even said she missed me! However...I didn’t actually ask her out, do I need to do that to make it official?*
He thought back to a specific moment of their conversation, where he told her that she made him happy and kissed her, easily the most intrepid thing he’d ever done. Thinking back on it now, it was incredibly embarrassing and he could feel his cheeks getting warmer and his chest tightening. He wanted to flip his hood up and recede into his clothes like a turtle into its shell trying to hide from the world, but that would have the opposite effect and just draw more attention to himself.
Ironically, that is likely the closest he’s ever been to properly articulating his feelings into words, even if thinking back on it made him flustered.
“Rough night?”
A distinctly stern and feminine voice shook him out of his stupor, he already knew who it was before he looked up. He slowly raised his head to face Sunset, sheepishly smiling and doing his best to avoid eye contact with her.
“Um...no, pretty good night, actually. I...sorry for not getting back to you, I got really distracted with something.”
Sunset was standing to the left of him, her arms crossed with a distinct scowl on her face and tapping her foot against the floor impatiently. Her outfit was a little different to what he usually saw her in. She was wearing a pair of skinny jeans instead of a purple skirt and a yellow shirt instead of a blouse, the collar of her leather jacket popped open more than usual and showed off more of the silver buttons that lined it.
“I don’t mind that much that you didn’t tell me what was up, I just wish that you’d texted me this morning. I was…” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, the tension in her body leaving as she relaxed and let out a relieved sigh, opening her eyes again as her scowl disappeared. “Worried. I didn’t know what happened and it was really sudden. Pinkie texted the group chat after that and I barely got a wink of sleep. Honestly, the only reason I haven’t crashed is because I’ve kept myself busy, I’ll probably pass out during lunch.” She said with a nervous giggle.
Jason could see what she meant, there were dark bags under her eyes, but they would only be noticeable if anyone was close to her or really looking for them. The guilt of being one of the main reasons she lost sleep stacked on top of his guilt for Pinkie was a bit much to bear, a strong desire to apologize rose in him.
He opened his mouth to do so, but like she knew exactly what he was going to say, Sunset put her hand out in front of her, gesturing for him to stop. “Don’t say you’re sorry. I doubt you had any more control over whatever happened last night than I did in Pinkie deciding to confess to you. I can’t blame you for that, so you shouldn’t either. What matters now,”
She lowered her hand and pulled out the chair under the side of the table she was at, sitting down and bringing her hands up to her face and rubbing her eyes. She pinched the bridge of her nose and took a deep breath, opening her eyes with a more haunted look in them as she struggled to keep her eyes open. “Is Pinkie. Please, just tell me what happened. I’m pretty sure whatever it is you realized last night has something to do with her, and more than anything I want to help.”
Now that she was closer to him, he could make out more details showing how disorganized she was. There were strains of her hair sticking out making it appear more raggedy, some of her clothes weren’t entirely on properly, and by the way her eyes were half-lidded and her head kept lowering every now and again with her having to stop herself, it was a genuine struggle for her to stay awake.
Jason had to bite his lip to keep himself from attempting to apologize again.
“You see...that’s the thing,” Jason said hesitantly, glancing away from her and rubbing the back of his head. “I don’t really know how much I can tell you. I don’t want to keep anything from you, it’s just the situation is really…” He paused as he tried to find the right word. “Sensitive.”
Sunset’s eyebrows furrowed as she leered at him like she had laser eyes and was trying to shoot a hole through his brain, but at least she was a bit more awake now. “Are you serious? Something so important happened that you had to end our call and couldn’t get back to me for the rest of the night, and you can’t even tell me what it was?”
While her words sounded almost threatening, there wasn’t any actual anger behind them. It was more like she was stating a fact she hated that she had to accept, that, or she simply didn’t have the energy to get angry.
“...Yes?” He whispered, recoiling slightly.
She stared at him for a few more seconds before sighing again, bringing her hands up to the sides of her head and rubbing her temples with her eyes closed. “Celestia dammit, why do humans love making things so bucking complicated? First algebra, now this.”
He heard her whisper under her breathe, but he had to do a double take as he asked himself if he really heard that right. Celestia? Bucking? He recognized the words, but had never heard them used like that before, almost like she was swearing.
“Will you at least tell me whatever you can? I’m not going to be able to relax unless I get some answers.” Sunset said as she begrudgingly opened her eyes again, slapping both of her cheeks to wake herself up. “I know you must have a good reason for not telling me, so I can’t be mad.”
“I…” He thought back to what Diane told him, that if Pinkie were to learn the truth, she might disappear. “I’ll tell you what I can, but you have to promise me that it can’t go back to Pinkie. It just...can’t.”
Sunset’s eyes widened in concern at the sudden desperation in Jason’s voice. “I hadn’t intended to anyway...but sure, that’s no problem.”
Her words were reassuring, he turned back towards the table, finding it easier to organize his thoughts and speak if he wasn’t facing her. “After we talked, I...came to a revelation about something, but I needed to leave right then and make sure I was right. I can’t tell you the circumstances, but it ended up with me bringing Diane back to my apartment and we talked. After that, she left and I passed out.”
“So Diane is involved with Pinkie?”
“...Yes.” He murmured.
“I knew it.” He heard Sunset whisper. “Jason...do you trust her? I told you about...what happened between us, she might just be using you to-”
“She’s not!” Jason suddenly shouted, a flash of anger at what she was about to say.
Sunset flinched, her mouth agape out of surprise at the usually meek man yelling at her. Jason realized his outburst and immediately looked towards Cheerilee, who was still passed out and hadn’t seemed to notice. He hid his face the best he could, an immense wave of embarrassment coming over him.
“She’s not.” He said in a hushed tone. “You just...met her when she was going through something, I promise she isn’t like that at all. She…” He closed his eyes as he pictured Diane breaking down and crying into his shoulder, her act falling apart and showing him how bad she felt for everything she’d done in Pinkie’s body. “Still beats herself up about some of the things she did to this day. I...can’t stand to hear anyone badmouth her, not when she’s already hurting that badly herself.”
“I’m sorry, I-I didn’t know.” Her eyes were downcast in a doleful expression, her voice surprisingly soft-spoken and filled with shame. “If I had known you had gotten so close to her I wouldn’t have...nevermind. I’m sorry, really.”
“It’s...ok, really, I can’t exactly blame you for it. With a first impression like that, I don’t think I’d have a good opinion of someone either.”
“Can I…” she glanced back up at him, shifting around uncomfortably in the chair. “Assume she’s the reason you can’t tell me what happened exactly?”
Jason remained silent, interlocking his hands as he twiddled his thumbs, needing to do something with his hands.
“Figured.” Sunset said with another sigh, having done so more in the past couple of minutes than anyone else he’d ever talked to. “Do you think you could get her to give you permission to tell me? Pinkie is...really important to me, and I want to be able to help her when she needs it.”
“Maybe...I’m not sure, we’ve never talked about you, I don’t know how she feels.” Jason seriously doubted he could, with how hard she tried to keep it hidden and him having to figure it out and confront her, there was almost no chance she’d be ok with other people knowing.
At the same time, he was very aware that he was way over his head with everything. His life had been so unexciting before, he had no idea how to handle all this or what to do to help Pinkie. Of course, he was grateful to have a girlfriend, a hot one who couldn’t get pregnant and genuinely liked him at that. Regardless, Pinkie was suffering because of the whole situation, and he really wanted to help her.
“I can try, I would really appreciate your help. But you have to understand, this isn’t my secret to share. If I can’t convince her to let me tell you, there’s not a lot I can do.”
He turned to face Sunset again, and her face blank. She was clearly intently thinking about something. She closed her eyes and remained silent for an entire minute, her breathing slowing down. He had actually begun to worry she had fallen asleep, and was about to try to wake her up when her eyes snapped open, more life in them before like she’d found the resolve to do something.
“I-”
As soon as her lips parted, The Pillar Men Theme began blasting from her jacket pocket, causing both of them to jump slightly. He’d recognize that theme from anywhere, it was all over the internet when it came out and still occasionally showed up today.
“Sorry, I gotta take this.” Sunset said with a sheepish smile and a small blush on her cheeks, reaching into her jacket pocket and pulling out her phone. She fumbled with it in her hands like it was the first time she’d ever used it.
“Hello? I’m…” She glanced at Jason nervously. “In the bathroom right now, I had Taco Bell and my stomach is really upset with me at the moment. Why do you-” He could just vaguely hear a girl's voice from the other side of the phone, but he couldn’t quite discern who it belonged to.
Whatever she had just said clearly shocked Sunset, she suddenly jumped up out of the chair, her eyes slightly bug eyed with a panicked look on her face. “What? No! Rainbow, we can’t! She explicitly asked us not to come over and that she wanted to be alone, visiting her might just make her more upset! You-”
More talking came from the other side, then a clicking noise as she ended the call. For the umpteenth time, Sunset sighed as she slipped her phone back into her pocket, bringing her other hand to the side of her head and rubbing it vigorously.
“That girl...no wonder she’s a pegasus, I’ve never met anyone as impulsive and spontaneous as her.” Jason raised his eyebrows at the word ‘Pegasus’, but like before, decided not to comment on it. “I’m really sorry Jason, I have to go deal with this before it gets out of hand. I’ll see you tomorrow, and hopefully I will get more answers.”
She turned around and walked a few steps, then unexpectedly stopped, glancing back at him over her shoulder. “Jason, please don’t blame yourself for any of this, it’s not your fault.”
He lowered his head and made a muffled grunting noise, shifting around in his chair to where he was facing the table again. “It’s easy to tell me that, you’ll find it’s a lot harder to convince me it’s true.” He said solemnly, directly quoting Diane. Now that he was more aware of Diane’s situation, he knew just how much meaning and weight those words carried when she said them to him.
Sunset had a sad expression on her face as she opened her mouth to respond, closing it and shaking her head back and forth, walking out and leaving Jason by himself. He lowered his head onto the table under his arms, his hood covering his head and closing his eyes, somehow left with more things to think about than before.
Again.
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Jason was in the library during lunchtime like usual, though this time he hadn’t actually eaten anything. He wasn’t sure if it was because he had so much on his mind, but he just didn’t feel hungry at all.
He was sitting in his usual spot on the second floor between the bookshelves, leaning against it while sitting on the ground. His hood was up and his mind was in a very different place. Ever since his talk with Sunset earlier in the day, he had been trying to think of the right words to use so he could convince Diane to let him tell Sunset her situation. He knew he needed to use the right words and wait until she was in a good mood. One of the major problems was waiting for the right time.
He didn’t want to do it today, at risk that doing so would make her upset and ruin the plans they had. At the same time, he hated making Sunset wait, especially with how much he wanted her help in repairing his relationship with Pinkie.
*How do the people in drama shows do it?*
He felt the distinct vibration from his phone telling him he was getting a text message. He half expected it to be Sunset, telling him that she had successfully prevented Rainbow and the others from visiting Pinkie after school.
In a pleasant surprise, it was actually Diane.
‘Are you alone right now?’
One of the things he didn’t like about texting was being unable to tell the tone behind messages, he couldn’t make out whether she was just being a tease or if it was urgent.
‘Yeah, why?’
He waited in anticipation as he saw the three bubbles showing that she was typing something. After a few more seconds he heard the ding and saw that she had sent him an image. As soon as it loaded his eyes widened and he felt the familiar tingling sensation and warmth or arousal through his body. He was very glad that nobody came up to the second floor during lunch.
He had been so distracted with thinking of how to ask Diane for permission that he had completely forgotten that she had promised to send him pictures of her in one of Pinkie’s cosplays. It was just as sexual as she suggested it would be.very tight bodysuit that left very little to the imagination. Even though he had seen her completely naked before, that didn’t make it any less arousing. The bodysuit was bright red with small, white lines around the stomach and chest areas. Gold bands were around her wrist and purple gloves on her hands. There was some kind of attachment on the back of it that might have been a helmet of some kind, but he couldn’t exactly tell.
She was also wearing some kind of headband with two small, sharp red horns poking out of it, and her teeth were much sharper than usual as she was giving him a toothy grin. She was taking the picture with her left hand, her right hovering beside her face and giving him the peace sign while she was flashing him that seductive wink of hers.
‘Like?’
Suffice to say, Jason was left completely speechless and stupefied. Thinking back on the hint she gave him, he felt stupid for not guessing it was Zero Two, it seemed so obvious now!
Luckily, he didn’t need to speak to type.
‘Yeah...I do, a lot. You look really good in that, I can see what you meant when you said you could pull it off but Pinkie couldn’t.’
She responded near instantly, a small heart coming off his message as she liked it.
‘Thanks babe, I knew you’d like it. ;)’
He sharply gasped at being called ‘babe’, he could practically hear Diane calling him that in her silky smooth voice. His fingers shook slightly as he struggled to type, an uncontrollable smirk coming onto his face as he was filled with a sense of joy that only Diane had ever given him.
‘So, unrelated but related question, how do you feel about BDSM?’
He had to think a bit to remember what that meant, having been a long time since he’d last heard it used. He was well aware of what fetishes were common, BDSM and choking being some of the most. He was never really aroused by either, but didn’t kink shame either.
He never liked the idea of choking because he knew he’d be too afraid of hurting the other person, though he’d never been choked himself, he doubted he would like it either. BDSM was something he was conflicted on. He...sort of understood why people were into being tied up and blindfolded, the feeling of being able to just completely give yourself to someone you trust did sound nice.
At the same time, he didn’t like losing control like that, of being unable to move or even see. The idea was scary to him, and he also didn’t think he’d ever find anyone to trust or that trusted him enough to do that. But now that he had, he was reminded of something he’d overheard a jock say when he was talking to his friends about fetishes; ‘If a girl is hot enough and I trust her, I’d be willing to try just about anything’.
‘I’ve never tried it, but I think I understand it well enough. Does this have anything to do with my ‘present’?’
She took a bit longer to respond than usual, he wasn’t sure why.
‘Mayhaps. I would send you more, but I have to go. I’ll see you in a few hours. (‘3’).”
He was fairly sure that the emoticon at the end was meant to be a kissy face, but he had to tilt his phone to make sure.
And just like that, Diane was gone and he was alone again. He didn’t mind, however. His smile faltered a bit, but didn’t quite leave. Her texting him was exactly the reassurance he needed, reminding him just how lucky he was. He would be able to get through all this and help her, how could he not with a girl like Diane at his side?
While he was still excited to get home, he was also now a little afraid of whatever the present was, though he couldn’t quite explain why.
**********************************************************************************************
It had been awhile since he speed walked anywhere, not counting last night. His apartment was close to the school, so he didn’t need to drive there. He would actually forget sometimes that he had a car, until he came back home and saw it sitting there. Depending on where he got a job, it might not be used for quite a while.
He had a mini-heart attack when his door easily opened before remembering that he had left it unlocked for Diane. He shut and locked it behind him, more out of habit than anything.
He was welcomed by...a trail of candy wrappers? It kind of reminded him of those scenes in movies where the man or woman leaves a path of flowers leading to the bed to try to be romantic, but there were no candles, and it was candy wrappers instead.
He couldn’t stop himself from chuckling at the absurdity of it.
*That’s just like her.*
He followed the trail of wrappers up to his bedroom still wearing his backpack and having taken off his shoes at the door. His bedroom door was slightly ajar, though the inside lights were still off. The door creaked open as he walked in, the room inside deathly silent. He flicked the light switch. One look into the now lit up room had Jason’s backpack, and his mouth, dropping to the floor.
He wasn’t exactly sure what he was expecting. A colorful box like a christmas present? A letter with his name on it? A puppy?
Not Diane herself.
Diane was laying on his bed, her hands tied together with rope above her head which was laying against the pillow. Her legs were spread apart, with similar rope tying her ankles to the posts of the bed keeping her in that position. She was wearing a thin, red blindfold that only covered her eyes, the rest of her face remained untouched.
*How...did she even do that to herself? In the dark?*
Her clothes, or lack of it, left him just as befuddled. There was no shirt to speak of, or even a bra. Instead, a thin piece of white cloth was tied around her chest, straining to hold back her breasts and just barely covering her nipples. A black thong was covering her genitals, but by the way they were squeezing because of how tight they were, he was probably seeing more of her than if she were naked.
The only thing else she was wearing were a pair of pink socks that went well above her knees, showing off her thighs and arousing him in ways he didn’t think possible. In seconds he was completely erect, almost to the point of pain. His throat became ludicrously dry. He could feel sweat running down his face after just a few seconds of staring and found himself completely unable to turn away or even blink.
“Jason? Is that you?” Diane said with honeyed words, the tone of her voice sending shivers down his spine.
“Yeah...where’s my present?” Jason’s voice was hoarse and strained as he found it more and more difficult to concentrate enough to even speak by the second.
“Don’t you get it? I’m your present, all tied up and ready to be unwrapped.” Despite the fact that she couldn’t move and literally had her hands tied, the confidence and seduction in her voice still made Jason feel like she was the one in control.
Jason gulped.
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Chapter Ten: Party of Two, Part Two. (VERY NSFW)
(Sexy stuff starting now, skip if you want.)
“D-Diane...I, uh...wow, I just…” Jason was finding it difficult to articulate his thoughts into words, so entranced by the sight before him that he didn’t even notice that he’d unclenched his hand and dropped his backpack to the ground.
The girl he was currently massively crushing on, the girl he was pretty sure he was now dating, was now before him in a way that made his blood catch fire and his pants uncomfortably tight.
She had somehow tied herself to his bed with rope while blindfolded, and was wearing by far some of the most provocative and arousing clothing -if you could call it that- he’d ever seen, all for him.
~If someone had told me this would be my life three weeks ago, I would have thought they were crazy. I’m with the hottest girl I’ve ever known, who can’t get pregnant, and is the second personality of another girl. I...is this a blessing or a curse?~
“I…” He was trying his best to ignore his ever increasingly erect member, which was getting well beyond the point of being painfully hard. “Am...not entirely sure I’m ok with this.”
Diane raised her head slightly and moved it in his direction, having used his voice to determine where he was. “Why not? Do you...not want me anymore?”
“No. it isn’t that…” From the familiar warm sensation pulsating through his body, his throbbing cock, and his libido that was getting more difficult to resist by the second, it was definitely not that. It was difficult for him to even keep his eyes on her face, having to actively keep his gaze from wandering to her body. No matter how many times he’d seen or felt it, he kept wanting her even more each time. “I’m just...I’ve never done this before. I don’t really like the idea of doing stuff to you when you aren’t in control or can really stop me, it makes it hard to tell if I’m doing something you don’t like.”
The corners of her lips curved upward into a warm smile. “Jason, listen to me. I trust you, completely. There’s nothing about me you don’t know, I’ve told you things I’ve never told anyone else. You’ve been nothing but nice and patient with me, tonight I’m going to reward you for that.” She shifted around on the bed a bit, presumably to get more comfortable, straightening her head to face the ceiling. “This is one of the things I was into. If you really, truly think you can’t do this with me, I’ll understand and you can untie me. However, I assure you there’s nothing you could do that would upset me. If there is, I will say something, I promise. I want you to at least try this, we can stop whenever you want.”
Her voice was confident and yet somehow also soothing, it didn’t waver in the slightest. He took a deep breath and walked forward, his hands trembling from how nervous he was. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure that I didn’t stutter.”
He gulped, exhaling loudly as he hesitantly brought his right hand forward, resting it on her inner right thigh and giving it a light squeeze. He heard her sharply inhale, and was surprised by how soft and warm she was, even though he really shouldn’t have been.
“Cupcakes.” Jason heard her whisper with shaky breath.
He turned his head to her, questioning for a moment whether she even really spoke. “What?”
“Cupcakes. It’s the safe word. If I want you to stop, that’s what I’ll say.”
Jason understood the concept of safe words, but didn’t entirely get the purpose of them. If you want whoever you were doing stuff with the stop, why wouldn’t you just say ‘stop’? He was sure there was some explanation for that, but he never felt the need to look into it.
“Ok.” Jason whispered back, his eyes drifting to the two beautiful mounds of flesh on her chest.
He ignored the anxiety inside of him, bringing his left hand up and towards her breast. He slipped it under the thin layer of cloth, groping as much of her left breast in his hand as he could, which seemed quite small in comparison. He could feel how erect her nipple was, matching maybe even his dick in hardness. He gave it a firm squeeze, the absolute softness and addictive feeling of it just as amazing as he remembered, maybe even more so.
He heard her let out a muffled moan and murmur something under her breath, but he couldn’t make out what it was. He gave the cloth a light tug and found that it came undone rather easily, pulling it off of her as her breasts came free and bounced almost eagerly. They were just as perky as he last remembered seeing them, his chest tightening briefly as he recalled that that was technically during when Pinkie was in control.
He had a strange...urge, to run his tongue along her body. He didn’t feel comfortable admitting it out loud, but ever since they’d kissed and he discovered that her lips tasted like bubblegum, he had this curiosity in the back of his mind about how the rest of her tasted. After she licked his neck and literally made him shiver from how good it made him feel, that sense of curiosity blended with his desire to pleasure her the way she did him; it made it hard to say ‘no’ to this opportunity.
~Well...she did say there was nothing I could do to upset her. Time to test that.~
He closed his eyes and lowered his head to her solar plexus, sticking his tongue out like he was going to lick a lollipop and running it against her skin. He made a straight line from there to the spot between her tits, leaving it slick with his own saliva and her sweat.
“Oh...fuck, Jason. That’s...do it again.” Pinkamena said as her entire body shuddered, a pleading tone in her voice he’d never heard before.
He happily obliged, this time starting at her belly button. He noticed her body squirm as his hot breath hit her stomach, feeling a tinge of satisfaction at the fact he was teasing her the same way she always did him.
Jason was struggling to describe the taste, it was unique and unlike anything he’d ever tasted before. It was distinctly sweet, which was unusual because he knew sweat and skin in general were kind of salty. This was different. It was like licking cotton candy, but more...texture? He didn’t quite know how to put it into words.
What he did know was how intoxicating the taste was. There was some muskiness mixed in with the smell of her body, that sweet taste he couldn’t quite explain, along with how smooth her skin was and how she shuddered and moaned in response was too much for him. His mind was getting hazy, Jason was soon unable to think coherently anymore as raw lust began to cloud over everything. His anxiety and nervousness began to ebb away as he kept stroking her body with his tongue like it was a paintbrush and she was the canvas.
Before he knew it he was crawling on top of the bed and hovering over her, his left hand still groping her breast and his right one resting just above her groin. When his tongue reached the spot between her breasts again, Diane jerked a bit and let out another moan. He eyed her nipples for a second, curious.
He traced a circle around one of her erect nipples before popping it in his mouth, causing her to let out a yelp in response. He didn’t really know what he was doing acting entirely on instinct and urge. Regardless, from how raspy and erratic her breathing was, and how rapid her heartbeat was, Diane was clearly enjoying it.
“R-Randal...never.” She paused, audibly gulping. “Did anything...like this.”
For one of the few times in his life, Jason felt proud of something he did. He didn’t know much about Randal, other than he sounded like the worst kind of person to be with. Knowing that he was pleasuring her in a way Randal never did made him happy.
Jason brought his right hand down to her crotch, rubbing the outside of her vagina through her thong. He was shocked at the amount of raw heat coming from that spot before he even touched it, and how wet he could tell she was. He pushed the thong aside and slipped his middle finger into her pink folds, the sound of her moaning like music to his ears. His mouth receded from her breast, tracing the tip of his tongue up her chest to her neck. As soon as he reached her chin, she lurched forward, capturing his lips in a sudden passionate kiss.
Taking advantage of his hesitation, Diane forced her tongue past his lips. Her kissing was filled with emotion and desire that he tried to reciprocate the best he could. Even though he was on top of her and teasing her insides with a finger, he still had the feeling that she was really the one in control.
The kiss ended quickly, a trail of saliva between their lips as they both breathed heavily. He slowly opened his eyes, glad that the moon was bright enough to illuminate the room and allow him to see her. Diane’s face was red and flushed; she had a broad grin on as she tried to catch her breath. It was incredibly sultry, but then again Jason was finding every little moan or twitch of her body alluring at the moment. Judging from how hot his own face felt, Jason was probably making a similar grin.
“Jason...I need you inside me, all of you.”
To Jason, those words were the go ahead he’d been waiting for. He feverishly brought his hands to the buckle of his belt, unfastening it with more vigor than he’d ever done anything before. With a light clang his pants and belt were tossed to the floor. His shirt followed them just before he lowered his body to where his erect dick was just outside her entrance.
“Wait!” Diane suddenly exclaimed. “Take off my blindfold first. I…” She lowered her head, the corners of her lips spreading into a sadistic smirk. “I want to see it enter me.”
Her words were honeyed and ardent, making it impossible for him to say no. He brought his left hand under her head and gently raised it, undoing the simple overhand knot as the blindfold slipped off her and fell to the ground. Jason found himself captivated by her beautiful blue eyes, the light behind them, and the fact that blue was his favorite color, made it his favorite part of her body.
He could see how much desire and emotion was behind her eyes as she looked back at him: The way she was slightly looking downward but still maintaining eye contact with him, how she was fluttering her eyelashes at him to taunt him. The hot, rapid gust of air that hit his face each time she breathed, the way her chin was trembling in excitement and anticipation.
He thought Friday was the best night of his life, but this? He already knew that he’d be looking back on this and wanting to repeat it for the rest of his life, and now that he was with Diane, they could create moments like this for as long as they were together.
He followed her gaze down to his still fully erect member, hovering just outside of her perfectly pink pussy. While using every ounce of self control he still had left, he lowered his lower body as slowly as he could. As soon as his tip entered her, he tightly closed his lips and had to lightly bite the inside of his cheek to resist the nearly overwhelming urge to slide the rest of his inches in at once. His body was wracked with his pent up sexual desire, screaming at him to force himself into her and take control. However, his mind was telling him that her enjoying this was just as important to him as his own pleasure. He didn’t want to rush this, he wanted to enjoy it, savor every moment.
His penis fit inside like it was the last piece of a puzzle. A slight squelching noise reached his ears as he felt his cock get slick with her juices. His cock felt perfectly warm, her insides encompassing and squeezing his phallus like it didn’t ever want to let it go. The more of himself that he pushed in, the harder he found it to pull out. It fit in her so...snuggly, which felt like an adjective he’d use to describe putting clothes on rather than putting his penis inside of someone, but it felt right . Something about this time wasn’t like before. Friday was more...spontaneous, there was little forewarning.
With this he sort of knew what to expect, Diane had promised before that something like this would be happening. Now, he knew that she was going to be staying the night. No rush, no place either of them had to be after this and nothing either of them needed to do. They could take their time and enjoy every second, burn this night into their memories.
That’s exactly what Jason intended to do.
As soon as those last inches were in, his balls pressing against her plump rump, a sense of euphoria spread throughout his body. It was like Friday, but stronger than before, something he didn’t think was possible. He couldn’t stop himself from letting out a loud moan as he was overwrought with elation, the carnal knowledge he was engaging with her was by far the most intimate and closest he’d been with someone. His arms, which were on both sides of the bed beside her, were quivering as he struggled to not just collapse and give in.
“Jason…” Diane whispered, panting like a dog on a hot day. “When...you’re inside me…” She tried to suppress a groan as she shifted, raising her lower body upwards and trying to get him as deep into her as she could. “It’s like...you’re filling up a hole inside of me that only you can. I mean it...Both Pinkie and I...have never felt as close to anyone as when I’m with you.”
He glanced up at her, their eyes making contact again. She had raised her head to look at him, a smile so wide it reached her eyes, which were practically sparkling. There was lust behind them, but also something gentler. A warmth he could only describe as joy, the same kind of look he usually associated with Pinkie.
Jason knew he should have been happy that she was looking at him like that, the same way he would see couples look at each other in the hallway. To a point, he was. At the same time, his entire body was trembling with sexual desire. His mind was completely hazed, his impulse to thrust into her and dominate her made it impossible for him to even form words. He did his best to return her gentle smile, placing his hands on her hips. In one swift motion, he pulled his cock out to the very tip, before pushing it back in as far as he could and pushing her body against his.
Diane responded with a loud squeal, arching her back and pushing against the rope around her wrist and ankles. Being inside of her felt so...perfect! Pulling out, even for just a moment, almost felt wrong to do. Each time he thrusted back in, he felt like he got a little deeper in, and her inner walls squeezed him tighter. It was like her vagina didn’t want him to remove his cock anymore than he did.
Soon, he was absorbed in the rhythm and lost in the rapture. Diane broke eye contact and lowered her head again, her eyes half-lidded and glazed over like she was in a trance. Seconds later she was wearing a lopsided grin and her tongue was sticking out, licking her lips eagerly as his cock slipped in and out of her, slick with both of their own body fluids and followed with the loud slapping of their flesh colliding. Each time he gave her every bit of his length he had, she let out a loud moan, thrashing her lower body in time with his thrust.
He followed her gaze, watching along with her the sight of the center of their coitus, joining her in moaning whenever he fully entered her. He soon understood why she was so interested in watching. There was a certain satisfaction in it, in observing the process that was giving them so much bliss, almost like a guilty pleasure. Jason had watched porn before, but actually watching it happen while he was the one doing it was...exhilarating! He felt like he was doing something he shouldn’t be, biting the forbidden fruit.
It made the entire experience somehow more perfect. His heart was beating harder than it had ever beat before, he couldn’t stop smiling, and no matter how much he was sweating and how tired his body told him he was, he didn’t want to stop. Everything about this night was perfect.
Jason quickly lost himself, ignoring everything and focusing on the pleasure. To him, the only sounds that were in the room were their combined moans and yelps of ecstasy, accompanied by the loud slaps of their bodies with each thrust. Every now and again, amidst her panting and gasps of pleasure, she’d curse under her breath whenever he thrusted a certain way. He wasn’t sure why, but learned very rapidly the best way to do it that got the most reaction out of her.
He got a small blot of sadistic satisfaction at every moan and yelp she made, understanding more about why Diane was such a tease. He was also starting to get why people were into bondage. If he just kept in mind that Diane wants this and is enjoying it just as much as he is, he could allow himself to bathe in the pleasure of having control over her like this. He had always had such little control in his life, he had become content with it and it never bothered him. However, now that he had a small taste of it, even in just the confined space of this bedroom, it was just as intoxicating as everything else.
Out of a mixture of how absurdly aroused he was in the moment, his absolute privation of self-control as he indulged in his primal desires, and how pent up he’d been the past couple of days, he ejaculated inside of her faster than he normally would have. Jason couldn’t stop the loudest groan he’d ever made from escaping his mouth. It was guttural and almost loud enough to be a scream. As he did, he pulled out to the tip of his cock one last time and thrusted back inside her with everything he had left, hot spooge spurting out of his urethra and deep inside of her, his cock throbbing eagerly with each pump.
As soon as he came inside her, she let out a mixture of a delighted squeal and a shriek of pleasure, her hips buckling against him as she pushed against her restraints, raising her body towards his as much as she could. He tightened his grip on her waist and pushed it down as much as he could, feeling her vaginal walls squeeze his cock tighter than before, trying to drain him dry of every last drop he had.
When the last shot of jizz was sent inside her, he collapsed on top of her, all his vigor gone following the immense release that build up had been leading to. His head landed on her chest, the spot between her breast and directly on her heart, listening to her heartbeat like she had done to him before. It was rapid and loud like a drum, but there was a certain rhythm to it that was almost soothing.
They were both breathing heavily, he was still inside her and fully erect, but he was sure if he pulled out he would quickly go flaccid. He felt Diane lower her mouth a bit, kissing him on top of his head, then the sound of her pulling against the rope around her ankles again.
“Jason...untie me.” She asked in a raspy voice.
Jason heard her, but it took him a couple of seconds to register it, he was currently experiencing something akin to jetlag. He took a deep breath and raised his head, quickly missing the sound of her heart beat reverberating throughout her body. He reached down and undid the ones around her ankles, finding they were tied with the same knots and just as easy to undo as the one with her blindfold.
As soon as he undid the ones on her wrist, she embraced her lips with his in another kiss. It was just as sensual and passionate as any other time. She brought her hands to both sides of his face, then wrapped it around his neck and brought him closer to her in a tight embrace. For a moment, Jason felt bliss as he sank into her body and closed his eyes, the intimacy and closeness in that moment was all he ever could have asked for.
Just as the moment began, it stopped when Diane suddenly flipped him over with her on top. He sluggishly opened his eyes out of shock, seeing that she had taken advantage of his surprise and tied his hands together above his head.
She was wearing that signature sadistic smirk of hers again.
“You didn’t really think I’d be satisfied with just once, did you?” She leaned down and whispered into his ear, giving his ear lobe a long lick as she traced it, similar to how he did to her earlier.
Jason didn’t have the time to even react, so taken back and effectively stunned by how quickly he had lost control and she had taken it back. He could do little more than shiver at the euphoric sensation of the way she licked his ear, his cock giving another weak throb as it was still inside her.
She flashed him a fox like grin as she lifted her body, his half erect cock slipping out of her with a wet squelching noise. “A little interesting fact about me.” He heard her say as she lowered her body, grabbing his cock in her hand, her mouth hovering above it and blowing hot breath on his tip as she panted. “I like the way I taste.”
With that she practically devoured his cock, still slick with both of their liquids, taking its entire length without a moment's hesitation. Since he just came, the tip of his cock was still very sensitive, his baby batter still dripping from it. With the way her tongue was swirling around the head, her head bobbing as his cock returned to it’s full erect glory, it was an overwhelming sensation of sudden pleasure. He couldn’t help but moan and pull against the restraints. He stopped squirming for a few seconds in surprise when his legs refused to move though. Looking down, Diane had managed to tie his ankles. Jason tried to ask her how and when that happened, but her tongue chose that second to roll over the tip of his cock, forcing the question from his mind as he bit the corner of his lip.
As soon as the bulbous tip of his member reached the back of her throat, getting fully erect again faster than he ever had before, she pulled it out. Her long tongue lopped out eagerly, licking his urethra as his cock was now covered in a new coat of liquid, holding it in her hand and giving it agonizingly slow strokes as she stared back at him longingly.
“I liked being dominated, and I’m sure you enjoyed dominating me. But now, we’re going to see how you like being the one who’s tied up and getting fucked.”
She lifted her body up, placing her left hand on his chest, her lower body hovering above his. She moved her hips around until her entrance was directly above his dick, bringing her right hand down to her penis fly trap and spreading her lips. He couldn’t help but watch. Something inside him reveled at seeing his thick white semen drip out of her and onto him; how her pussy was covered and filled with so many liquids from the both of them that it had a visible sheen to it.
“Remember, the safe word is Cupcakes.”
Some part of him expected that she would, as slowly as possible, guide herself down so he could watch. Instead, she took all of his manhood in a single swift motion. She tossed her head back and sighed, her right hand rubbing the little pink nub at the top of her vagina.
“One more time.” She whispered as she lowered her head, bringing it down to Jason’s. Her long, pink hair covered most of her face, but he could still see it clearly. The wide grin on her face, her heavy panting and red hued look, her blue eyes filled with something similar to wanderlust as she looked down at him.
It was a stark contrast to how she was just last night. It was how he preferred to see her.
“You’ve got…” She brought her mouth to his neck, licking him from his collarbone to his right ear lobe. “One more in you, right?” She whispered into his ear, her voice pleading with him as she gently nibbled on his earlobe.
~How could I say no to that?~
“Y-yeah, I think so?” Jason said as he tried to move at all, his libido coming back with a vengeance, making the feeling of his cock just sitting inside her without moving frustrating in a way he’d never experienced before.
“Good.”
She raised her body again, glancing down between her legs as she raised her hips, he could just barely make out the tip. She let out a deep sigh as she pushed back down, placing both her hands on his chest as she started to ride him. He peered up at her, seeing she had that same expression on her face as Friday. Her eyes half closed and filled with lust, her tongue hanging out of the corner of her mouth as she let out moans that got louder with each bounce.
Diane was slamming down hard and desperately onto his cock, like it was the last thing she’d ever do. Combined with how sensitive his cock still was, basically his entire pelvis area was experiencing a dull pain. Yet, at the risk of feeling a tad like a masochistic, Jason kind of liked it. It was comparable to whenever he’d get the occasional cramp, the stark feeling of relief as the muscles relaxed wherever the cramp was easing. This was stronger though, and was still accompanied with a bit of pain with each downward thrust of Diane’s hips, which somehow made it better.
Maybe it was just the fact that the pain was being caused by the hottest girl he knew screwing herself silly on top of him. That probably helped.
At first, Jason disliked being tied up like he was now, having gotten used to and enjoying the dominant role for the short period he had it. Now that his ardor was taking over again though, he was enjoying not having to do anything and letting someone else just completely take over. If he really tried, he could probably break the restraints, even as weak as he was compared to most men.
But something about the illusion that he was just a slave to her whim, that she was in complete and utter control, was alluring and aroused him further. He could also tell with that devious glint in her eyes and the way she was staring down at him, that she was just as turned on by being on top as he had been just moments ago. The faster she picked up her bouncing and harder she brought herself down, the more her nails dug into his chest as the melody of her moans got louder. He honestly didn’t mind the pain, it actually helped him focus on the pleasure more.
After just a few moments of Diane taking him like this, Jason’s libido began to overwhelm his body's concerns. All sense of time and dull fatigue was pushed to the back of his mind like trying to remember a dream. Despite this, his entire lower body was still rebelling and telling him to stop and rest, still not having recovered. He got the idea that he was going to be absurdly sore tomorrow. Regardless, he did his best to push through, fairly sure he was ‘feeling the burn’, as he’d heard in several workout commercials.
With every ounce of strength he had, he tried to match her pace, squirming beneath her and using his knees to help Diane bounce on top of him. It was messy and chaotic. Their breathing, moaning, and heartbeats weren’t in sync like the few sex scenes he’d seen where the couples were perfectly in tune. He could briefly feel the rapid beating of her heart where their bodies were connected, just as erratic as his own but dancing to its own beat.
Even so, despite their motions being out of sync like two musicians who’d never played together, they were still the same. Feeling the same overwhelming, mind clouding, numbing pleasure. They were making the same noises like animals breeding in the wild going hand in hand with the wet, meaty slaps of their flesh and creaking of the bed. If they looked, they’d have found the same jubilant and awestruck smile on each other as they both watched the intersection of their sex like it was their entire worlds.
In that moment, they were the same, and couldn’t have possibly been more intimate or close. Jason added on to the list of things he now understood about Diane, finding the list of stuff he didn’t understand getting drastically smaller. When she said that she had sex not for the pleasure, but for the intimacy, he didn’t get it at first. How was that any different than hugging someone? Even after they’re previous session of coitus, he was much more concentrated on not messing up than truly enjoying the moment.
Now he got it. Now that they were connected in the closest way possible, with him being inside her and her dropping her mask and showing him who she really was, he got it. In this moment, the intimacy and bliss being shared between them allowed both of them to understand one another in ways nothing else could. She understood him better than anyone he’d ever known, Jason actually liked himself around her, and felt he could be genuine. Also, for once, he thought he understood why she was the way she is. There was no awkwardness, no anxiety or nervousness when there was eye contact between them. Nothing existed but how he felt and who he was deep down.
Her, both Diane and Pinkie, and only them, had truly broken his shell that had held him back his entire life.
Jason was enlightened by this. A plethora of emotions, all positive, began to overwhelm him. His last few thrusts were almost mindless and desperate, some part of him having sensed he would be releasing again deep inside her soon, and intending to give her everything he had left. The girl, no, the woman who offered him everything deserved nothing less. He wanted to combine his physical pleasure with his emotional breakthrough in hopes of arriving at the absolute peak of fulfillment he could.
When he reached climax, along with their combined screams of pleasure as he could discern she came almost at the same he did, he couldn’t help but cry. A hot tear rolled down his face as his screaming groveled down to something between a sob and a moan. The strongest sense of relief and happiness he’d ever experienced rose to the surface like boiling water in a pot.
As he shot what he was sure was the last of the semen he had, almost positive that once again his balls actually shrank a bit, she collapsed on top of him with a sharp gasp. His hands relaxed as her fingers were no longer digging into him, leaving small red marks behind on his chest that weren’t deep enough to bleed, but would likely take a day or two before fading away completely.
Without either making any more noise than their shallow breathing, she raised her right arm above her and effortlessly undid the restraints on his wrist, then down to his ankles before plopping back down on his chest like she had no energy left in her at all. As soon as the ropes were off, he acted on the first impulse that came to mind, wrapping his arms around her and pulling Diane as close to him as he could, biting his lip to stop himself from letting out another sob of relief. He wanted to capture it, to grasp the intimacy between them like it was a real, tangible thing.
He peered down at her, able to tell from where her long eyelashes were that her eyes were closed. Her long, gorgeous straight hair covering most of her face, some of it slick with her own sweat. Yet, without a shadow of a doubt, he could see that little grin of hers. A distinct satisfaction, like she’d just finished the biggest and best meal of her life and was about to sleep better than she ever had before.
She raised her body a bit, her arms shaking as they struggled to hold herself up, and gave him a peck on the lips. She opened her eyes and glanced down as she raised her lower body too, his dick popping out and going flacid in moments. Doing so unleashed the floodgates of her vagina, the semen he’d shot into her began to pool out of her, resembling a donut someone took a bite out of. Rather than some grape flavored filling, it was his own man jelly that began to make a small puddle on his pelvis, some of it leaking down onto his bed.
(Sexy stuff over now.)
“Wow, you really…” Diane said with a surprised sounding scoff. “Came a lot inside me. Like, a lot. I guarantee you if I could get pregnant, I would be.”
Jason couldn’t stop himself from smirking, a joke coming to mind that exemplified more than anything just how dirty his thoughts had really become. “I guess…” He tried to catch his breath as he spoke, the endorphins and adrenaline fading away and making him realize just how exhausted he was. “You’re a CreamPie now, huh?”
She laughed. It wasn’t just a laugh, it was identical to the one he heard the first time they’d met. It gave him a sense of nostalgia, which felt almost wrong since that wasn’t even really that long ago.
“That…” Diane said, collapsing on top of him with a playful slap on his chest, which stung a bit more than it should have. “Was by far the worst joke I’ve ever heard. That means something since Pinkie has made some terrible ones, you have no idea how much I envy you for not having to experience her pun phase.”
She looked up at him, her mouth open like she was going to say something else before abruptly stopping. Her eyes narrowed and her smirk dropped into a frown, shifting to a much more concerned expression.
“You’re crying.” She said as she brought her right hand up to his face, trembling slightly as her thumb traced his cheek and wiped away his tear. “Why are you crying? Did you...not like it? Did I...do something wrong?”
The sudden transpose from her usual cocky and confident tone, to a meek one that sounded like a little girl who knew she’d done something wrong was so extreme and sharp that it actually hurt his heart to hear. He shook his head back and forth as he gazed down at her, bringing his right hand up to her head as her soft hair interlocked his fingers, playing with her hair like she had said she liked.
“No Diane...I’m happy. I’m....” He gave her the best smile he could, which felt more real than any he’d given before. “Just so happy and relieved. How could I not cry? I’ve never felt like this before! I have everything anyone could ever want. You’ve made me happier than I could have thought possible, I can’t put it into words, crying is the closest I can get.”
She cusped the side of his cheek, a tear rolling down from her left eye as she let out a wet sob. “Jason...You have no idea what that means to me. I...I’ve spent so long just trying to make someone, anyone, happy! I..didn’t think I could do it, that a fuck up, an accident like me wouldn’t be able to make anyone happy. To hear you say that is…” Her hand fell as her head slowly dropped, resting her head on his chest like it was a pillow. “If I could cry right now, I would. But, Pinkie didn’t exactly get a lot of sleep last night. That, which was the best sex I’ve ever had in my life by the way, took everything out of me.”
He could tell how tired she was because of how close they were. Her entire body was quivering, her legs and arms especially so. They were both so soaked in sweat that he was sure if there wasn’t the thick smell of sex in the room, it would be impossible to ignore it. Every part of her body that was on top of him was completely relaxed and would flinch every now and again, he didn’t think she could move even if she tried. He typically would have been disgusted by the various liquids covering his lower body, they were warm but he could also tell they were very sticky and kind of felt gross.
But he didn’t have the energy left to be disgusted, or to really do anything. Both his hands were stagnant on her body, fatigue setting in so quickly and heavily he found it near impossible to keep his eyes open. As he closed his eyes and darkness encompassed his vision, there was one thought left on his mind. His self control and self regulation gone and not there to prevent him from turning it into words, his anxiety not there to warn him of what could go wrong by saying it.
“Diane.”
“Hm?”
“I think...I love you.”
His words came out as nothing more than a raspy whisper, but from the way her fingers, which had been tracing a circle around his nipple idly, stopped. She had heard him. He couldn’t look down to see the expression on her face, as curious as he was about it. His senses were dulling very quickly, he knew with absolute certainty the soreness he’d be feeling in the morning would come with likely the worst pain he’s ever experienced in his life, and yet he didn’t dread it.
The last thing he felt before slipping into unconsciousness was Diane kissing his chest where his heart was, raising herself up and bringing her mouth to his ear, whispering to him six words in a gentle tone he thought only a mother would be capable of.
“I think I love you too.”
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Chapter Eleven: The Truth Comes Out, Part One. (NSFW)
Sleeping had always been a sort of conundrum to Jason.
He never dreamed. He knew what dreams were, of course, but just never experienced them himself. For him, whenever he tried to sleep, it was simply just a process of him closing his eyes and then opening them hours later. It was like he had just chosen not to experience those several hours. Jason couldn’t count how many times he had tried to remember the exact moment he fell asleep, it was a battle he would never win but also would never stop fighting.
Tonight, however, was a bit different. If he ever woke up in the middle of the night, it was typically due to having to pee. He liked to drink water a lot and it didn’t help that he had an overactive bladder. This time, instead of his body demanding that he relieve himself, it was to his ear getting tugged on like someone was trying to get his attention. It was a bit painful, but the person who was doing it was still very gentle, it was actually kind of enjoyable.
With a groan, Jason groggily opened his eyes, blinking rapidly until he could see properly, or at least as well as was possible with how dark his room was. When his eyes finally adjusted, he could barely make out that Diane’s face was just a few inches from his, eyes barely visible. It was creepy but comforting at the same time. Her eyes were half closed and had a sultry look to them, less sexual and much more like she was just enjoying teasing him.
“Hey, you’re finally awake.” She said while trying to make her voice as gruff and masculine as she could, obviously trying to mock someone.
Jason’s mind was foggy and it took him a few seconds to process things, he had actually forgotten why Diane was on top of him at all and had a very minor and brief heart attack. Then like a tidal wave all of the memories, along with the emotions that accompanied them, hit him at once. The happiness, the physical pleasure, the pure euphoria he felt, was unlike anything he’d ever experienced before.
The fact that he was completely naked with a very attractive woman also completely naked should have made him feel a cacophony of emotions, everything from sheer embarrassment to crippling anxiety. Maybe it was because he was basking in the aftermath of last night’s rapture, or just Diane herself, but at the moment he just felt utterly relaxed and complacent. He was sure at least part of it was because of how comfortable he was with Diane. Things that applied to most people didn’t apply to her, which luckily included his social anxiety.
For the most part, at least.
“Diane, It’s…” Jason reached over to his night stand and turned on his phone, glancing at it and seeing that it was just a few minutes past four. “Four in the morning. Why did you wake me up?”
He wasn’t overly upset that Diane did wake him up, he was sure she had a good reason for it. Jason just...really didn’t like being woken up. It would be almost impossible for him to get back to sleep now.
“Well, buster, ” Diane said in a snarky tone, disapproving the slightly irritated tone in his voice. “I wanted to tell you that Pinkie is going to be waking up in about two and a half hours, give or take. It shouldn’t take me more than fifteen minutes to get there and ‘fall asleep’. I wanted to wake you up so we could take a shower. I doubt you’d want to go to school after last night, and I don’t even want to think about how Pinkie would react waking up like this.”
He couldn’t deny her logic. From how disgustingly sticky his entire lower body felt, on top of the gross, hot feeling that came from sweat, he was suddenly really craving that shower. Jason probably should have expected that laying in bed completely naked with someone after rigourious sex would have made both of them feel pretty dirty after waking up, not that either had much of a choice since they quite literally passed out afterwards.
He brought his hand to his face and rubbed his eyes to try to wake himself up more, it did little to get rid of the mist dazing his senses. “That…” He paused to yawn, disliking the taste in his mouth after just waking up. “Makes sense. You didn’t have to wake me up though. I’m a pretty heavy sleeper, you could have easily gone ahead and took a shower and then woke me up after.”
Jason noticed her head drop a bit and then shake it a little, he wasn’t quite sure why. “Oh you poor, sweet, wholesome boy.” She said in a tone that sounded like someone would use on a child.
She leaned forward and grazed the tip of her tongue across his cheek, which very quickly and effectively woke him all the way up. She stopped at his earlobe, giving it a slight nibble, her hot breath directly on his ear sent shivers down his back and a twitch in his cock.
“I said we are taking a shower, as in at the same time. Your shower is big enough for the both of us, right?”
Her voice was so innocent that it completely masked the meaning behind what she was suggesting, something Jason would never understand how she did so well. The image of taking a shower with Diane made him both aroused and worried, as irrational as that was. He had already seen her completely naked multiple times, but it still made him a bit angsty at seeing her naked, like he was seeing something he wasn’t supposed to.
He’d be too scared to say it out loud, but he was also somewhat agitated about Diane seeing his body. It wasn’t anything special, he didn’t work out, but he also wasn’t particularly chubby. It was just average, which was the problem. Compared to her body, which was very easily the sexiest female body he’s ever seen in his secluded life, it felt almost wrong to be naked with her.
“I...I think so?” Jason stuttered out, trying to ignore the rising heat of arousal across his entire body and his quickly hardening member.
“Good.”
Diane lifted herself off Jason, placing her feet on the ground off to the side of his bed and jumping down with an energetic bounce. She stood on the tip of her toes and raised her arms above her head, stretching and then letting out a satisfied squeal that he found downright cute.
Despite the fact that he could breathe better now that a literal weight had been lifted off him, he missed the contact of their bodies together. It sounded ridiculous since they had literally just slept with each other, but no matter how much time he spends with her, it’s never enough.
He couldn’t see any details of her body due to how dark it was, so he just watched the outline of her walk across the room and flick the lightswitch. He slammed his eyes shut at the sudden brightness, waiting a few moments before opening them again and lowering his gaze to his legs, an almost morbid curiosity to see how they looked.
It certainly didn’t appear as gross as it felt. Anything below his thighs actually seemed completely normal, though his intuition was telling him that they were going to sting like a bitch when he tried to move them. His entire pelvis area on the other hand was just layered in various stains. Almost slick with his and Diane’s sweat, his half erect penis was sticky with small patches of dried semen, along with the spots between his genitals and his thighs, and his stomach. It actually made him wrinkle his nose a bit at the sight of it, which caused him to breathe in the pungent smell of the room he had missed before.
The distinct smell of sex in the room was rancid, but it wasn’t so bad that it burned his eyes. The best way he could describe it was that it smelt like how sweat tasted, but with a sharp...muskiness to it. The strange part was that he didn’t particularly dislike it, even though it was a strong smell it wasn’t necessarily a bad one. He could even find himself coming to enjoy it with enough exposure, sort of like anchovies on pizza in a weird way.
As soon as he relaxed and brought his head up to Diane, blood rushed to his face in a blush. She had turned to face him, her perfectly perky rack on full display to him without a hint of embarrassment. Her entire body was as perfect as usual, her perfectly slim body and flawless skin leaving his throat dry. The only exceptions to her perfection were now around her thighs, where similar spots of dried semen could be seen. Even the pink thigh highs she was still wearing, the only clothing she kept on because they had both honestly forgotten about them, had a few spatters of white on them that had dried to the point of being somewhat crusty.
There was a tinge of guilt due to him having been the one who did that, it felt like he’d tainted something pure, which was certainly not the case here.
“Well? What are you laying there and staring at me for?” She asked as she put her hands on her hips. “You can look and touch the merchandise as much as you want in the shower, you’ve gotta get up first though. All of you, I mean, not just your dick.”
He tore his gaze away from her voluptuous body, trying to hide his embarrassment as he moved his legs. The second he did and they were dangling off the side of his bed, there was a stabbing pain throughout both of them, like someone was playing a very large game of tic tac toe on him with needles.
~I never got the saying ‘gonna feel that in the morning’ until now. Yep, I’m definitely feeling it.~
He suppressed a groan as he stood up, pushing through the pain since he knew that, hopefully, last night would not be the last night of rough and passionate coitus. The pain had briefly distracted him from the fact that he was naked, something he was harshly reminded of when he looked down and his fully erect cock was poking out from between his legs eagerly, rearing to have more sex when it hadn’t even been cleaned from last night.
He was also reminded of how...unimpressionable his body was. He had no scars, but he did have a freckle or two and some light acne. His frame was normal, and he had no hair on his body to speak of since he shaved semi-regularly, he didn’t like having hair since he found it itchy. The only thing he might say is abnormal is that he had an innie belly button which made it almost appear like it wasn’t even there, he wasn’t sure how common of a thing that was.
He more or less tried to shamefully hide his body the best he could, which wasn’t very easy. He grabbed the blanket on the bed that they had mostly neglected, using it to cover basically the entirety of his front. Jason was expecting Diane to get that devious glint in her eye and that sly smirk, teasing him about how he was acting more like a girl than she was. Instead, her eyebrows furrowed and her smile dropped into a frown, apparently upset by what he did.
That hurt more.
“Jason…” Diane whispered under her breath, concern evident in her voice as she walked towards him.
He tried to keep his eyes on her face, the way her breasts were bouncing with each step, and even her thighs jiggling slightly, made it even more difficult to contain his libido. As soon as she reached him, she yanked the blanket from his grip with relative ease, and then embraced him. She gently wrapped her arms around his back, pulling him into a hug so tight it almost felt like it was the last one she’d ever give him. Her absurdly soft breast squished against him, and he could feel his dick poking against her stomach.
At first, he thought it was supposed to be sexual. It wasn’t until she buried her head into his chest, with her hair covering nearly her entire face, did he realize that wasn’t the case.
“Di-”
“Aren’t you comfortable with me Jason?”
Her tone was sad and dejected, it made his chest tight and stomach drop in a way he hated more than even his own anxiety. He pushed down his desire and unease, wrapping his arms around her back and resting his chin on the top of her head, pulling her more against him.
It did little to relieve how tense he could tell her body was, it would take words to do that, by far the thing he was the worst at.
“No...Diane I’m...very comfortable with you, more than anyone else. I literally can’t put into words how happy I am that you're comfortable with me enough to walk around my apartment naked. It’s just…” He paused as he closed his eyes to try to put his thoughts into words. He deeply inhaled, able to make out her delightful smell even from the scent of sex that filled the room. “I’m...really insecure about a lot of things, including my physical appearance. Seeing how just ridiculously perfect and sexy you are makes the contrast that much more apparent, I don’t want you to see what I look like and...decide you don’t want me anymore.”
He waited in anticipation for how she would react, hoping he used the right words and didn’t mess up. After a few seconds he noticed the tension in her body ebb away as she let out a shaky sigh, raising her head and giving him a small smile.
“Jason, I don’t really care what you look like, I’m not that shallow. I’m attracted to you for you. I know you don’t think much of yourself, trust me, I get it. I also know saying it might not convince you, but please, believe me when I say nothing you can do or say would make me stop liking you.”
Diane’s tone was stern and reassuring, she kept eye contact with him and her leer did not waver. It honestly kind of scared him a bit, but it did let him know that she was entirely serious. It wasn’t a question of whether he trusted Diane or not, he did completely. It was more he didn’t understand how she could find him attractive.
~Just something I’m going to have to learn to live with I guess. Should have figured I could literally have the perfect girlfriend, and still think there’s a problem.~
Jason gave a hesitant nod, which seemed to satisfy her. She pulled back from the hug and stood on the tip of her toes, giving him a brief peck on his lips and then twirling around like a ballerina before trotting towards his bathroom.
He found his attention lowering to her plump rear, there was a visible jiggle with each step, sort of comparable to jello. Jason was honestly amazed by the female anatomy now that he’s had multiple chances to observe it in all it’s bare beauty. It was astonishing how their waists were so slender and yet the breast and butt were much more...rotund. No matter how much he saw her, or even touched her, it didn’t quench his urges to enjoy the softness of her feminine attributes.
The best part was that she probably wanted him too as much as he did, it was just a matter of him adjusting to their very open relationship.
“Just a warning,” Diane said in her usual upbeat tone, opening the bathroom door with a sway of her hips he knew was intentional. She turned to face him, leaning against the now open door and waiting for him, giving him a flirty wink and a toothy grin. “I like my showers hot.”
**********************************************************************************************
The shower had been, surprisingly, very non sexual.
Not to say that they didn’t touch each other or do anything, because they certainly did. Amidst the actual cleaning themselves that entails a shower, they had a very sensual make out session. He had taken the opportunity to explore her body once more, yet again taken aback by how ungodly soft she was, and enjoyable to touch to the point of near addiction. However, this time he attempted to initiate going further due to sheer lust overshadowing his typical anxiety, but she stopped him.
Diane told him that they didn’t have time for it. While he knew that was true, it made him a bit guilty when she said that. He couldn’t quite shake the feeling that there was more to it than just that. Either he was getting much better at reading people, or much worse and he was starting to see problems where there weren’t any.
Neither would really surprise him.
It wasn’t until after they got done and dried themselves up that he realized he didn’t exactly have any clothes for her, or maybe she just selectively hadn’t mentioned it. They ended up on deciding to let her wear the thong since it was easily the cleanest piece of clothing she came with, and one of his shirts. He was about a size larger than her, so while it fit on her well enough to where it didn’t just slip off, it kind of hung on her body like an overcoat. It went down to her upper thighs, and if Jason was being honest with himself, he found it adorable.
He had just tossed on a pair of boxers, a t-shirt, and jeans, what he normally wore.
The shower had taken roughly twenty minutes, giving both of them plenty of time to basically do whatever they wanted, which made him wonder why she woke him up so early in the first place. He turned to her to ask her that exact question, only to find that she had managed to walk over to his bed without making a single sound. She picked the blanket up off the ground and laid it on the bed, covering some of the stains from last night that Jason needed to clean out before he slept in it again.
She patted the spot beside her with her hand, gesturing for him to sit next to her. He was bothered by the expression on her face, more specifically, the absolute lack of one. She had the same blank expression on her face that he’d seen a handful of times now. An absent playfulness to her eyes that was a sign that she was thinking about something really important.
Jason still was terrible at social interaction, but he had spent enough time with Diane and knew her well enough that he had a smidge of confidence in being able to read her. The best indicator was her body language. Her shoulders were slumped, he could see that her jaws were tight, the left one was slightly indented which meant she was chewing on the inside of her cheek. These were all little tells Diane had whenever she was upset about something, or thinking about something serious.
Jason tried really hard to convince himself that it wasn’t creepy that he’d memorized all these things and that he just cared a lot about her. Sometimes it worked.
He gave a nervous, almost audible gulp as he sat down beside her, barely able to ignore the constant fear of not being good enough for her that was eating away at him. He wanted to believe Diane when she said nothing he could do would push her away, but the thought that she would suddenly realize that she could do much better than him was always there, and it terrified him.
He sat there for a solid minute without saying a word, waiting for her to say whatever it was she clearly wanted to say. His arms rested on his knees, his hands clutched and trembling slightly as he kept glancing at her. The anticipation was killing him.
~I’m starting to think she does this on purpose because she likes being dramatic, she really is similar to Pinkie in a lot of ways.~
Without making a sound, which Jason found both impressive and disturbing, Diane turned to face him, crossing her legs and arms. Her blank expression was unchanging, though he could see the corners of her lips twitching as she struggled to keep it that way.
“Jason, I need to know: Did you mean it when you said you loved me last night?”
His face turned scarlet at Diane’s question, having hoped she wouldn’t have asked him about that. When he said that, it was when he was feeling that euphoria of physical pleasure and mental relief, telling her that he loved her felt like the only way he could express both that and how grateful he was to her for making him that happy. However, now that he was more lucid, he questioned whether that was a good idea or not.
“Diane, I…” He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he tried to calm himself. He wanted to be completely truthful with Diane, but he knew that might hurt her feelings, so he needed to be careful with what he said. If he messed up this relationship, he’d never forgive himself. “Don’t really know anything about love. What I’ve heard from tv shows and stuff pretty much sums it up. When I said that last night, it’s because I wanted to tell you how much I care about you and how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. Telling you I love you was just the first thing that came to mind. In reality, I’m not clear enough about what love is supposed to mean to be able to tell you with utmost confidence that I do love you.”
It was hard for Jason to say that without stuttering or wavering at all. While he trusted Diane completely, it was still aggrevantianly difficult for him to put his thoughts and feelings into words, no matter how much he wanted to at times.
Diane’s body flinched at his words, her head dropping and her long, silk like hair covering most of her face. He could tell what he said made her dejected, biting the corner of her lips to prevent herself from frowning. Before it got any worse, Jason placed both of his hands on hers, awkwardly interlocking their fingers. She gave out an empty chuckle at his actions, not stopping him, even though she clearly didn’t understand why he was doing it.
“That doesn’t mean...that I don’t feel anything for you.” The reason Jason was trying to hold her hands was because he was trying to recapture some bit of the intimacy from last night. He recalled in detail about how much she valued closeness, and trying to recreate that, as embarrassing and awkward as it made him feel, was an easier way for him to make her feel better than words. “I don’t know if it’s love, but I know that it’s genuine. Whatever it is I feel for you is the realest thing I’ve ever felt for anyone, it was like there was a piece of me that had been missing, and being with you makes me feel complete.”
“I don’t know if that’s love. If it isn’t, then I can promise you that I can love you. I care about you more than I care about anyone, maybe even myself. You’ve given me so much, you make me so happy, and make me want to try to be better. What I feel for you might not be love, but one day it might turn into that, and that’s more than what I could say about anyone else I’ve known.”
If it was with anyone else, maintaining eye contact and holding both of their hands the way he was would have been impossible, and very likely would have induced an anxiety attack. His hands had gotten sweaty and trembled as he struggled to keep a grip even with it being Diane, his mind trying to focus on the words he was saying and working to keep his voice as stern as he could.
When he was done and said everything he could think to say, he noticed his heart was beating like a drum in his chest. All he could do now was wait with dry lips to see if he had said the right things or not. Jason also hadn’t noticed until he stopped talking that her grip had been getting looser as he spoke, her arms were shaking worse than his and her lips were quivering.
“Jason, that’s…” He hadn’t heard Diane’s voice that shaky since she’d told him about her situation. Her eyes widened as a hot tear rolled down the right side of her face. She reacted immediately, disconnecting their hands and wiping off the tear. “All I could have asked for.”
She took a breath and calmed herself, leaning forward and placing her hands on the sides of his face, rubbing her thumbs gently against his cheeks as she captured his lips in a kiss. He was taken aback by it, not having the time to kiss back as it only lasted a second or so. Then she lowered her hands and wrapped them around his back, placing them firmly on his shoulder blades as she nuzzled her face in his neck.
The hug and sudden shift in tone made Jason bowl over. He was relieved that he apparently said the right things, but confused how she went from hinging on his every word to embracing him. He almost reflexively hugged her back, which is when he noticed that it was different from how she hugged him earlier.
When she did so before the shower, there was a lot of care put into it as she tried to make him more comfortable with her. This time, her clutch on him was iron tight even as her hands trembled, it felt desperate. He could feel her lips quivering as she gave him small kisses along his neck. It wasn’t in a sexual way either, it just seemed like she was trying to be as intimate with him as she could be.
He didn’t like it. Everything about it made him feel like she was doing this because it was the last time they could, that thought filled him with a sense of foreboding dread he was all too familiar with.
Her chest rose as she took a deep breath and then exhaled, which didn’t make her shaking any better. She pulled back from their embrace, placing her arms on his shoulders so they were dangling off.
“You need to tell Pinkie.”
Her voice was low and barely more than a whisper, but he was able to make out how much effort it took for her to actually say it. For once, Diane was the one who couldn’t keep eye contact with him. Now that he was on the receiving end of it, he could tell when someone was just pretending to be making eye contact with him, and she was.
“Tell her what?”
He tried playing it dumb, hoping he was misunderstanding like he occasionally did.
“Everything.”
He wasn’t.
His heart skipped a beat at the emptiness of her tone, shattering any hope he had that she was talking about something else. His entire body slumped and he lowered his hand, feeling a strange sensation rising up inside of him.
“Diane, if I do that…” His eyebrows lowered in a rare expression of seriousness on his face. “You might disappear. I...really don’t want to lose you, not when I just got you to be mine.”
“You think I do?!” Diane shouted at him, the first time she ever genuinely did so. “I’m fucking terrified of what might happen if you tell her! There’s a very real chance I might just disappear and no one but you and Pinkie would know I ever existed! Or maybe she’ll just push me into the back of her mind, never able to have control again and forced to do nothing but watch! Or maybe nothing at all will happen! Maybe knowing about me will change nothing, and things will keep going like they have been all these years, the only difference being she’s aware! I don’t know!”
Both of her arms were extended outwards with her palms open, making gestures to emphasize what she was saying. Her eyes were narrowed, nose wrinkled, and mouth in a sneer as she scowled hard enough to where it was almost etched on her face. Despite the distinct anger in her expression, he could tell the corners of her eyes were tearing up as she struggled to stop herself from crying.
She was making it obvious that she was even more against the idea of telling Pinkie than he was, terrified at what could come from it, and how much she had agonized over doing it for a long time now. Diane wanted to be her own person, but it was impossible to do that when she kept having to use someone else’s body. She had her own feelings, wants and desires, but none of that mattered if she had to keep reminding herself that her body didn’t belong to her.
“If you’re that afraid of it, then why-”
“Because I can’t take this guilt anymore!”
From the way she yelled, it was like she was raising her voice to try to relieve some of the mental anguish she was experiencing. Jason recoiled at the sudden outburst, somewhat hurt by it, even though he understood it wasn’t him she was angry at.
He wanted to say something to comfort her, but nothing came to mind, leaving him with his mouth slightly parted as he agonizingly waited. Her head dropped as her hair covered the entirety of her face again. An almost visible puff of air came out of her mouth as her chest and back rose, she was taking very heavy, exasperated breaths.
“How long…” She paused as she tried to stabilize her breathing. “Do you think...our relationship could last? Before someone finds out? A couple of days? Maybe a week or two? A month if we’re lucky. No matter what happens, Pinkie will find out one way or another, it only takes one of us messing up a single time. She might be forgiving, but even she has her limits. If she learns, she’ll probably see it as you using her body without her permission, and she’ll never forgive you for that.”
Jason bit the corner of his lip, among other things, he had been trying to keep that thought at bay. He didn’t like being reminded that the body he was having sex with belonged to someone else, but there was only so long he could ignore the pit of guilt in his stomach from that same thought. Especially since he couldn’t ignore his romantic and sexual desires for Diane, a direct conflict of interest that he wished wasn’t there.
“We...can make it work Diane. Telling her anyway, how is that any different than her finding out on her own? I don’t like it anymore than you do, but I want to be with you.”
“Because, it would hurt a lot less if you told her rather than her finding out. Also, I...couldn’t do it. Every time we kiss or touch or do anything, I can’t help but think about how it’d hurt Pinkie. Don’t get me wrong, I love you and I love being with you, a thousand years wouldn’t be enough to repay what you’ve done for me. I mean everything I’ve ever said to you, and I would give anything to stay with you. But…”
She slowly raised her head, and the sight of her pained expression made him want to rip out his own heart rather than deal with the agony it was making him feel. The tears she had been struggling to hold back were now running down her face, prominent lines between her eyebrows and pinched lips with a clenched jaw. The sight made Jason regret having sex with her last night, if doing so had caused her so much pain.
“I can’t keep doing it. On top of knowing the permanent damage I’ve done to her body and everything with Randal, I can’t live with the fact that I would be with the person she likes, using her body. It’s...too much, I just can’t.”
She crawled towards him, placing her hands on his chest and pushing him onto the bed. He didn’t resist at all. She kept her hands on his chest and laid her head against it where his heart was, listening to it was soothing to her.
“I mean it when I say I love you. I’m not exactly anymore experienced in romance than you are, but I don’t think I’m wrong in that. If there is any chance of us having a relationship, and god do I hope there is, then it’s only if Pinkie knows and she’s ok with it. Telling her risks so many things, but it’s the only way to ensure that we can stay together, which is what I want right now more than anything.” She paused as a muffled sob escaped her lips. “You...should tell Sunset first, she’s probably going to talk to you during breakfast like before. It’ll make it easier for you to tell Pinkie, and so someone can help her through whatever happens afterwards.”
“You…” Jason audibly gulped, understanding just a tad more how a deer felt when caught in headlights. “Know I’ve been talking to Sunset?”
He felt her shift around on his body to get more comfortable, the sensation of her warm, soft skin rubbing against him distracted him somewhat. “No, but Pinkie does. I told you she’s very perceptive. It’s near impossible to lie to her and she notices everything. Don’t worry, she also knows there’s nothing going on between you two. Sunset’s….in a weird place right now, and romance is the last thing on her mind.”
Her voice was completely monotone as she spoke, her eyes closed as she idly traced her finger in a circle around his nipple. He could tell his chest was a bit wet from her tears, and also that she was trying to focus her mind on something else, at least for a little bit.
“And...you aren’t mad?”
“I could never be mad at you Jason. It’s not like you two were having sex in between the bookshelves or something, that would have been a lot more noticeable. I trust you completely, if you didn’t tell me about her, it must have been because you didn’t think it was that important.”
Jason was conflicted.
While the words were somewhat passive aggressive, there really was no tone in her voice. He was also glad that she had actually referred to herself as a person, something he was happy he was able to make her realize.
However, he was also terrified of the prospect of telling Pinkie everything. He didn’t want to lose this girl in his arms. Before, when he had become accustomed to loneliness, he would have thought it ridiculous at how much he had come to care for her in a mere two weeks. Now, like he said earlier, he had genuinely believed she had become a vital part of him. Without her, it would be like someone carved a Diane shaped hole out of his very soul.
“Then...what do you want me to do now?”
Jason was doing everything he could to keep the anxiety and angst at bay, it was almost pathetic how close he was to crying at that moment. The main thing stopping him was that he knew, no matter what the outcome was, he would look back at this as potentially the last time he could be with Diane. He didn’t want to spend it crying over a future he was unsure of, instead, he wanted to cherish the time with her the best he could.
Diane halted her absentminded tracing on him, grabbing his arms that had been motionlessly laying on the bed. She placed one on her head and the other on her back, then pressed her head as deeply into his chest as she could.
“Please...just hold me.”
**********************************************************************************************
He had only really been able to spend an hour or so with Diane before she had to leave, but that hour was so unbearably short. He could tell that she didn’t want to leave anymore than he wanted her to, but Pinkie ‘waking up’ in Jason’s apartment could only make things exceedingly worse.
He barely had the motivation to go to school, already knowing he wouldn’t be able to pay attention in class at all. Jason had next to no appetite, focusing entirely on how he was going to explain things to Pinkie. He was so overwhelmingly riddled with anxiety that he couldn’t stop his body from shaking, and from the way some people glanced at him before he put his hood up, he didn’t look much better either.
This was without question the most distressed he’d ever been in his life, the only thing that came to mind that compared was a play he had to be in when he was in elementary school. While he certainly felt like he was going to, throwing up wasn’t going to get him out of this. The best he could do was try to work through it.
~On the plus side, at least I know I won’t fall asleep in class or anything.~
Surprisingly, and unfortunately, the librarian Cheerilee actually seemed more energetic and alert today, almost eerily so. She had a wide smile that was all too forced, and he was fairly sure her left eye was ever so slightly twitching.
Luckily she mostly ignored him as he went to his usual table and sat down, probably because she could tell the mood he was in. He carelessly tossed his backpack to the ground as he plopped down, letting out a relieved sigh now that he was mostly away from people, which tended only to make his anxiety worse. He took off his hood and leaned back against the chair, his arms dangling lifelessly to the sides as he closed his eyes.
To help keep his mind focused, he began reciting what exactly he was going to say to Pinkie and how he was going to say it. There were, of course, some details he would have to leave out, such as the sexual things him and Diane got up to. There were other things too, like Randal. Is that something he should bother to mention? Or would it just be pointless? He didn’t truly know, nor did Diane say anything about that.
“Wow, I...don’t even know what to say. Frankly, you look terrible. I thought I was bad yesterday, but you look like Applejack after harvest season, but somehow worse.”
He hadn’t even noticed Sunset walk up to the table, so enthralled in his own mumbling that he was basically in his own little world. At the same time, Jason wasn’t overly surprised by her sudden appearance, Diane did warn him she would approach him today.
“Trust me, I know. I’ve been avoiding mirrors because I’m sure I look pretty bad.” Jason said as he leaned forward in the chair, opening his eyes and turning to Sunset. She was in much better condition than when he saw her yesterday. She was wearing the same outfit, but the bags under her eyes were gone, which meant she either put on makeup or got a sufficient amount of sleep. Her hair was also back to the same style when he first met her and wasn’t unkempt.
He wasn’t sure what it was, but seeing Sunset now made him realize how attractive she was. Her skin was flawless and her outfit complemented her perfectly, her eyes were so full of life and her smile was refreshing in a way. Jason felt a tinge of guilt at this as he already had a gorgeous girlfriend, but he knew he’d never act on it.
“Good news is I...got permission, you could say. It’s much more like she already knew we’d been talking.”
Sunset’s smile dropped briefly to shock, then to worry and fear. She pulled out a chair and sat down in it, resting her arms on the table. “Is that why you look so distraught? Did you two have a fight or something over it?”
He couldn’t help but chuckle a bit at the concern in her voice, even if it was a little wrong to do so. “No, the exact opposite actually. Last night was the best night of my life, no contest. The problem is…” Jason sighed as he lowered his head, nervously twiddling his thumbs, a lifelong habit he always had when nervous that he never quite broke. “She wants me to tell you and Pinkie everything, nothing about that is easy. I need to figure out exactly how to word certain things and what all I need to mention. Saying the wrong thing the wrong we would be...bad.”
He wasn’t quite sure what kind of reaction he was expecting out of her, but while there was still some evident concern, the corners of her lips curled up into a triumphant smile.
“Lay it on me then! I’ve been wanting an explanation, I’m not sure why Diane wants you to tell Pinkie, but I can help you with that. I probably know her better than you do.”
“Not as well as you think.” Jason murmured under his breath.
It wasn’t as quiet as he hoped. She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at what he said, her arms uncurling and her hands clenching slightly into fist. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“Well…” He tensed up at the accusatory tone in her voice, fumbling a bit over his words as the anxiety he had been trying to suppress came back with a vengeance. He knew that he couldn’t just explain everything at once, he’d need to do one thing at a time, starting with the most complicated one.
“To sum it up....Diane and Pinkie are kind of...the same person.”
He waited in tense silence after saying that, reeling back a bit as he dreaded her reaction. She sat there for a few moments before leaning back in her chair, crossing her arms as she sternly stared at Jason.
“Elaborate.” The red and yellow haired girl said bluntly, reminding him more of a detective interrogating a suspect than a high school student.
“I...can try but it’s...complicated, I don’t really get it myself.” He remembered every word of what she said to him, that night was forever burned into his memory. However, that didn’t mean he really understood that much of it. The best he could do was try to simplify what he did understand himself, at the risk of paraphrasing.
“She said...that something happened to Pinkie that caused a lot of issues, something between her and her friends I think. Some kind of mental trauma that forced her to create Diane as a coping mechanism to deal with all the emotional problems that came with it. She didn’t mention how long it’d been or go into much detail, just that the event that sparked it happened sometime during middle school.”
As soon as the words middle school left his mouth, he heard her sharply gasp and her eyes widened, her entire face went pale like she’d seen something terrible. She wrapped her arms around her shoulders like she was cold, grasping her leather jacket desperately. She lowered her head as her eyes shook, an expression somewhere between disbelief and shock on her face as she muttered something to herself.
“No, it couldn’t have been...right? Did..did I do this?”
Her voice wavered and carried a solemn tone, he got the feeling something he said really made her upset. He considered Sunset a close friend, so seeing her so suddenly distraught like this bothered him. He ignored his social anxiety and placed his hand on her shoulder, hoping the physical contact might help.
“Sunset...are you ok?”
His voice and the touch seemed to snap her out of it. She glanced up at him, taking a deep breath before closing her eyes and whispering to herself. He was only able to make out the last part, which was something along the lines of ‘my past is not today’. The color returned to her face as she opened her eyes, a small smile on her lips as she turned to him.
“Yeah, I just...it reminded me of something. It’s not important, don’t worry about it.”
He waited a few seconds before nodding, retracting his hand a bit, relieved. He didn’t know why she had that reaction, but it wasn’t any of his business, at least not now. He had more than enough on his plate already, if she said it wasn’t important, then he’d just have to trust her.
“If you say so.” Jason mumbled as he shifted around uncomfortably on the chair. “The details…” He briefly glanced away, recalling vividly how ashamed Diane was of the drinking and other late night activities she used to do. “Aren’t important. Whenever Pinkie had a lot of negative emotions she didn’t want to deal with, she kind of just...pushed them onto Diane, and she ‘takes over’ at night time and vents. That’s probably why she was so aggressive when you saw her, she has to deal with all of Pinkie’s piled up problems and it...really takes its toll on her.”
“The problem is, with how Diane and I’s relationship has…” He glanced away from Sunset once more, this time with a noticeable red tint on his cheeks. “Progressed. We both agree that Pinkie needs to know the truth. The thing is, I feel like no matter what I say to her, she’s going to be upset about it. There’s also the real possibility that when I tell Pinkie, Diane might just disappear, and I…” He paused as he closed his eyes, the image of Diane eroding into dust and blowing into the wind was far too lucid for his liking. “Really don’t want that. So, if you could help me in any way...I’d really appreciate it.”
Sunset’s expression didn’t change very much throughout his explanation, it was blank as she intently listened to his every word. When he was done, she tilted her head to the left a bit like a dog. A confused expression on her face, like she was expecting more and didn’t understand why there wasn’t.
“Is that all?”
Jason was baffled by how casually she asked that, as if it was just a minor problem and that he hadn’t just told her that one of her friends was essentially living a double life. “Does this...not sound crazy to you? Pinkie has a second personality that I’m in a relationship with! That seems like something you’d read in a bad book or something.”
Sunset brought a finger to her chin, glancing to the side and making a light humming noise, evidently mocking thinking hard on his question. “...Not really? I mean, I can read minds from just touching people, having a split personality in full on Jekyll and Hyde style doesn’t seem that bizarre. I’ve definitely dealt with stranger things. Besides, I….” She paused as she brought her gaze back to him, her complacent smile dropping for a moment into a more saddened expression. “I guess you could say I’ve experienced something similar.”
“Something similar….to having an alter ego?” Jason asked, disbelief written on his face.
She responded with a shrug of her shoulders and a sheepish smile, but nothing about her behavior was suggesting she was lying. Some part of him wanted to ask her about that. He was finding it hard to believe the odds that two people would experience something like that so close to one another were even possible. However, Jason got the feeling that if she wanted to talk about it more, then she would have.
“Ok...getting back to the original subject.” He laid back in his chair rubbing his right temple as he felt a slight headache coming on. It was probably from a multitude of reasons. Frustration and anxiety at the top of the list, but he could blame any number of things and it’d probably be right. “Will you help me with this? I...can’t mess this up with Pinkie.”
“Yeah, of course I will.” Sunset said with a scoff and a wave of her hand. “You're both my friends. While for different reasons, I want to help both of you.”
Her words were genuine, and while Jason somewhat questioned why she appeared borderline desperate to help him, his gut was telling him it was for a good reason. “I...really appreciate it Sunset. I’ve been stressing about this all day, I…” He let out a breath he’d been holding in. Knowing that someone else was willing to help him was a huge relief, though it only eased the weight of anxiety on his heart a bit, they still had the hard part to do. “How do we start?”
Sunset held up a finger gesturing for him to wait and grabbing his backpack with her other hand. He didn’t bother stopping her since he didn’t have anything in there particularly important. She unzipped it and reached in, shuffling around a bit until she pulled out a notebook and pencil. She laid it out on the table in front of it and flipped it open, twirling the pencil between her fingers with surprising expertise and precision.
“I need you to tell me everything.”
He reflexively gulped.
**********************************************************************************************
They had spent the majority of breakfast and a bit of first period going over things. He tried to tell her to just go to class and that they could continue later, but she said that what they were doing was more important.
He was sure it had nothing to do with the fact that her first class was AP algebra.
Jason did tell her everything, sort of. He kept it somewhat vague and only went into details for certain things, like about her ex boyfriend. Both out of sheer embarrassment and because he didn’t think Diane would be ok with him talking about their sexual activities. He told her basically everything else.
Afterwards, they both agreed it would be easier for Jason if they were to write out what he was going to tell Pinkie, that way he could rehearse it to himself like a speech or something. She ended up helping him with what he should mention and what he shouldn’t. He always asked for her reasoning behind them, and she always gave an explanation he could at least understand. She even helped him with the exact wording of some things so it was the least hurtful.
To summarize, he would be telling Pinkie basically everything with the exception of a few details. He wouldn’t be mentioning Randal, the things Diane did with her body such as the drinking and smoking, and he wouldn’t explain the...extent of his relationship with Diane. Everything else would be things Sunset felt Pinkie deserved to know, the rest she thought was unnecessary and would just risk straining the relationship between her and Jason.
Afterwards, Sunset left, telling him she would make sure Pinkie would come by during lunch and talk with him up by the bookshelves. She begrudgingly went off to her class, mumbling something about being tired of having to deal with both math and letters at the same time.
To Jason, while it made things immensely easier for him now that he knew what to say, he couldn’t deny that some part of it felt...shallow. He came to this realization as he memorized it through repetition during class, he knew even if he tried to pay attention he wouldn’t learn anything.
Just repeating words had a certain meaninglessness to it that could easily be interpreted as non caring, he didn’t like it one bit, but he also didn’t have a lot of choice. He was too worried that if he tried to change anything he’d mess it up.
When lunch came around, Jason still found himself far too nervous to even have an appetite. Sure, he knew what to say now, but that certainly didn’t stop the ever present fear of failure. He instead waited on the second floor between the bookshelves, the same place he spoke to Sunset before. He remained crouched down on the ground, with his back against the books.
“...Hey.”
He perked up at the sudden voice, narrowing his eyes slightly as he didn’t quite recognize it. Pinkie was standing at the end of the aisle, her voice was hoarse and didn’t have that upbeat tone to it she usually did. Her appearance was somewhat different too. She was wearing the same outfit, but her hair was disheveled and unkempt, somehow more of a curled mess than usual. Yet it also had much less of the bounce than it usually did, kind of dropping like a wet rag. Her skin wasn’t as bright as normal, more of a dull pink really.
“Hey.” Jason replied awkwardly.
He could tell the smile on her face was forced from the way it was shaking, she was struggling to keep it on. She didn’t want to be here talking to him, especially not after he turned her down. He didn’t think she disliked him, just she was still dealing with getting rejected and didn’t quite know how to deal with it.
“Sunset...told me you had something to talk to me about, that it was really important? I didn’t even know you two were friends, I was pretty surprised!” She said with an awkward chuckle, a ghost of her former joyous laughter.
“It’s...the truth. Something you deserve to know.” Jason said as he turned away from her, seeing her tense up out of the corner of his eye.
“Does it...have to do with why you turned me down?”
Jason gave a solemn nod, doing his best to ignore the pain in his heart from hearing Pinkie’s aggrieved voice. “It also...has to do with Diane, in more ways than you think. Pinkie...I’m sorry to do this to you, but it’s very important. Just...trust me, you want to hear what I have to say.”
He didn’t dare even glance at her, he wasn’t sure if he would have been able to handle the look in her eyes. He heard her walk into the aile, lowering her body until she was sitting on the ground similar to how he was. Pinke sat opposite of him, her head lowered and expression blank as she patiently waited.
Jason took a deep breath, this was the moment of truth.
“It all started a few weeks ago, when I was taking a walk…”
View Online
Chapter Eleven: The Truth Comes Out, Part Two.
Numb.
That is the one word that Pinkie could use to describe how she felt after her talk with Jason: Numb.
She didn’t understand at first why he was telling her all the things he was, some of them he had already told her about before, and she could also tell there were some details he was leaving out. She also noticed that when he retold her some events,they were with some added details he had neglected before.
The more he talked and told her, the stronger the sense of foreboding dread in the back of her mind grew, and yet she couldn’t quite explain why. It was like every word he said was giving her a puzzle piece, and the more she got, the more she could see the full picture, only to soon realize what it was and losing the desire to finish the horrible depiction.
Despite what she wanted, it would be finished nonetheless.
Once Jason was finished, Pinkie having intently been listening quietly and patiently, any thoughts or emotions failed her. What he was trying to tell her was obvious after a point, yet she refused to believe it, she didn’t want to. It wasn’t until he blatantly told her that she and Diane were one and the same that the truth sunk in.
Even at the end she attempted to deny it, trying to find a fault in the explanation Diane had supposedly given him. However, considering two of her best friends were talking horses, or the fact that she’d fought both megalomaniac demons and mythological sirens, it wasn’t that terribly unbelievable.
Not just that, but something inside her was telling her it was...right. Maybe some part of her had always known the truth, a possibility she had always considered since it answered too many questions. Now that she was being forced to face a reality she had been repressing, it was impossible for the pink party planner to be willingly oblivious to it anymore.
Without a single word, she got to her feet and walked out of the aisle, not even giving Jason another glance. She didn’t know what expression he was making or how he felt, just that he didn’t try to stop her.
She didn’t bother going to the rest of her classes, her mind was akin to radio static as she could not form a single thought, trying to learn anything would have been pointless. She should have tried to tell her friends that she was leaving, she knew they’d be worried about her. The thing stopping her was the fact that if she tried to, she’d have to think to type in words, and right now she didn’t want to think.
At the moment, she was on total auto-pilot, she wasn’t sure how long she’d be able to stay like that.
On her way home in her car, she started getting...flashes, was the only way she could explain it. It was strikingly similar to that whole incident with Sunset and the memory stone, when Wallflower caused her and everyone else to forget her until all the memories came back.
Instead of that, it was...much more like reexperiencing events she didn’t remember experiencing, or finally recalling a dream from months ago her brain had been hell-bent on forgetting.
They started once she pulled into the driveway, which she was admittedly thankful for as they were increasingly distracting and painful. It started with the first night that Diane manifested, the confusion and misunderstanding.
Then came the drinking, the taste of cold alcohol burning down her throat, so vivid she could almost feel the heat in her cheeks and warmth in her chest at that moment.
The smoking, the raw taste of burning and ash in her mouth as her lungs filled with charcoal like gas, so lucid her throat itched with a strong desire to cough.
The worst part was the emotions. The dread. The pain. The angst. The anger. The guilt. All the negative feelings she had been pushing down and forced onto Diane were coming back to her full force, and it was mentally agonizing.
She managed to ignore it until she got up to her room, glad her parents weren’t home and her siblings were still at school. Once she got there, she collapsed onto the bed, clutching her head in her hands and grinding her teeth as the memories and emotions bombarded her. Soon she began to remember Randal, the man who she gave everything to out of desperation to give her life meaning. The raw shame she felt when she offered herself to him, and him using her like a toy.
Pinkie began to feel new guilt and shame, for having shoved all these emotions down onto Diane, to have made her suffer like that. She couldn’t deny that she was obscenely upset about Diane having used her body like that, however she also couldn’t deny that by redirecting all of her anguish and her urge to make people happy over to her, she was at least partly to blame.
Things became easier when recollections of more recent events came to mind. The first time she met Jason in that alleyway, where her relationship with him truly started. Even with the knowledge she had now, it was impossible for her to tell if her feelings for him were truly her own, or had been transferred from Diane.
Everything else came blasting with a mixture of emotions: The first night she spent with Jason, the rapture of being intimate and valued by someone else. It was unlike anything she’d experienced before, and was leagues better than anything with Randal.
Then came the things that happened after. When Diane broke down and told Jason the truth, and how much it had been hurting her with what she’d been doing with Pinkie’s body. Any latent resentment she might have towards her shifted to sympathy at how blatantly sorry and regretful she was. It made it difficult to hold a grudge.
Everything after that was relatively positive. The night of confessions between the two, and then the second night of passion they shared, and lastly the events of that morning in Jason’s apartment. All the emotions, which at first were from her originally, had become Diane’s, and she had reexperienced them as if they were her own.
All the blanks in her memories had been filled, even the ones she didn’t know were empty. Every night of binging alcohol and smoking, every night with Randal, the recent events with Jason, and all the pain and bliss that came with it. There were no gaps or questions anymore, she knew everything Diane did, though it didn’t help to ease her torment.
She wasn’t sure when, but sometime during the onslaught of memories she had closed her eyes and pushed her head into her pillow pile. Pinkie wasn’t able to focus on anything but her thoughts, blocking out everything else. Tears had rolled down her face even when she didn’t recall crying, the numbness from before fading away and revealing the cacophony of emotions she had been suppressing for far too long.
“...Hey…”
Pinkie’s eyes snapped open at the sudden voice. It was weak, feminine, and petrifyingly familiar, yet she couldn’t place where she’d heard it from. She raised her head and scanned the room with her eyes, she had them half open since the light burned them a bit. She couldn’t see anyone else, she appeared to be completely alone in the room.
“...Over here…”
She shifted her head towards the sound of the voice, this time it sounded somewhat muffled, and was coming from her wardrobe.
“Oh, great, I’ve finally lost it. First I find out I have a second personality, and now my clothes are talking to me, fantastic!” Pinkie said with mock exuberance, letting out a hollow chuckle as she wiped the tears off her face.
She hopped off the bed, walking towards the wardrobe fueled by a sense of curiosity and a desire to distract herself from her thoughts. She grabbed the handles of the wardrobe, pulling it open without an ounce of hesitation. Pinkie wasn’t entirely sure what she was expecting, her clothes now having faces, wearing big, eager smiles and wanting to talk with her? That was certainly not the case thankfully , her clothes were as faceless as always.
She was much more taken aback by what she saw when she glanced into the mirror.
She saw her reflection, but it was...different, distorted to an extent. She was wearing the same clothes, but the changes were evident in everything else. Her pink skin was much duller, and her hair wasn’t curly at all, but silky straight. The thing that bothered her the most was that the reflection wasn’t actually how she looked. She brought her hand up to her hair and ran it through, and while it wasn’t as puffy as usual, it was still about how it always was.
A second glance made her realize exactly what it was she was gazing at, she looked like Diane.
The reflection waved its hand, flashing her a sheepish smile, the corner of her lips shaking. “Hi, Pinkie. It’s...nice to finally meet you in person, kinda.”
For the second time that day, Pinkie’s mind turned to static at the sheer weight of trying to process what was happening, though she recovered a lot quicker this time. She knew the person she was looking at was Diane, all the pictures she’d seen of her before were undeniable proof of that. The newfound knowledge that Diane is the embodiment of all of Pinkie’s pain made this meeting she’d been wanting so much more...surreal.
“I…” Pinkie stammered as she tried to form a response, this being the first time she could actually talk to her zealous doppelganger. “You know...I had already planned out an entire party for when I finally met you. Seems pointless now, huh?”
“Yeah, I’m…” Diane’s friendly facade faded, the awkwardness of technically being the same person and trying to have a conversation made it hard to keep up the usual pleasantries of socialization. “Sorry, I know how much you like your parties.”
Pinkie suddenly found herself on the floor, not even noticing her legs were shaking when she walked to the wardrobe, her knees buckling and giving out as she collapsed. She wasn’t quite sure why. They didn’t hurt or feel particularly weak, physically, she felt fine. Emotionally, on the other hand, ‘distraught’ would have been on the bottom of adjectives she’d use to describe her current mental state.
She felt the immeasurable weight of guilt from forcing everything onto Diane like that, but, as much as she hated it, she still held some shards of animosity towards her. She sympathized with her, yet the fact that she did permanent damage to Pinkie’s body wasn’t something she could ignore. Pinkie was also experiencing a strange sense of relief and happiness. Part of her was absolutely terrified that the real reason Jason turned her down because he didn’t like her, finding out it was because he already developed feelings for a different side of her was strange, but better.
There was a plethora of other emotions she was experiencing beneath the surface, but those were the most prominent and strongest in that moment.
“Hey…” Pinkie raised her head at Diane’s words, finding her vision had started getting blurry again from tears. She could make out that Diane was pushing against the mirror with her hands pressing on it, like she was on the other side of a window. Her eyebrows were knitted and pulled together, her smile now a deep frown as concern was etched on her face. “Are you okay?”
Diane paused as she lowered herself, seemingly trying to hide the frustration at the fact that she couldn’t physically comfort her. “Yeah, It’s just…” Pinkie brought her hands to her face and began wiping her eyes. “A lot to take in, y’know? Like, your friends turning into demons and learning there’s an alternate dimension where there are talking ponies that can use magic is one thing. Learning you’ve been living a double life that’s so secretive that you aren’t even aware of is...kind of crazy, and that means tons coming from me!”
“Trust me, I get it. I’m probably the only person who understands.”
Diane’s voice lowered, awkwardly rubbing her shoulder and glancing to the side. Despite the fact that they were the same person, they didn’t share thoughts, but Pinkie knew what was on her mind, because she felt the same way. It was difficult for them to talk, not because they didn’t know what to talk about, but the opposite.
They both had so many questions to ask, so many things they could talk about, it was impossible to choose. Pinkie in particular wanted to ask about Jason, to ask her her reasons why she fell in love with him to see if they were different, it was the only way she could really know whether their feelings for Jason were the same or not. However, she was afraid of doing so, of the revelations that might come from that.
She saw Diane’s chest rise and fall as she took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she tried to compose herself. She opened them and turned to Pinkie, resolve behind her eyes and an unwavering determination.
“Pinkie, I...can’t put into words how sorry I am for...well, everything . The damage I’ve done to your body, Randal, and even Jason. I care about him a lot, but...I shouldn’t have done anything with him, especially not after you developed feelings for him too. He...I ju-”
“Please...stop.” Pinkie’s voice was barely more than a raspy whisper, but Diane heard it clearly and stopped in the middle of her sentence. “If...if you had just done everything you did because you wanted to, without considering me at all, and without any guilt, I’d be furious with you. But…” Pinkie paused and sharply inhaled, closing her eyes as the vivid memory of Diane breaking down as she confessed to Jason appearing in her mind like a movie. “You didn’t.”
She opened her eyes and stared into Diane’s, clutching her heart as a dull throbbing pain started that was in sync with her heartbeat. “It’d be different if you just said you were sorry, I would believe you, but it’d be hard for me not to be at least a little peeved. With you though I...can feel it, how long you carried that guilt, and how cathartic it was to finally be able to talk about it with someone.
You were trying to deal with everything, and it tore you apart. Jason was the first to see you as a person, he made you feel happy and like you were worth something, when you’d spent so long in despair and thinking you were nothing more than a coping mechanism for me. How could you not fall for him? You saw someone you could be with, you didn’t have to be alone anymore, there’s no way I could be mad at you knowing everything you’ve been through. If anything, I should be begging for forgiveness, I…”
The blunt pain in her heart worsened as she spoke, hot tears rolling down her face again, her voice breaking as she spoke and unable to make it any louder than barely above a whisper. She could also tell that Diane was feeling a similar way, her entire body quivering and her lips pursed, hanging on every word Pinkie said.
“Wish I was smarter, that I would have figured it out sooner. Or told my friends. Or stopped lying to myself for so long. If I hadn’t been so selfish and dealt with my problems like a normal person, none of this would have happened! You wouldn’t have had to suffer, maybe I wouldn’t feel so alone. I...I just…” Pinkie’s voice cracked as she leaned forward, lowering her head and placing her hands on the ground in front of her, unable to talk while having to see the pain behind Diane’s eyes. “I wish I had known sooner so I could help you!” She shouted with a wretched sob.
Pinkie’s emotional dam broke, she was unable to keep the emotions bottled up anymore, openly weeping on the ground. The guilt and despair became too much, tears ran down her eyes as she cried like a child, clenching her fist. Some part of her was glad that she decided to come home early when no one was home, that way she could be as loud as she wanted.
Diane didn’t make a single noise as Pinkie broke down, out of respect or fear, it was impossible to tell. She genuinely couldn’t remember the last time she gave in and just fell apart, crying was one thing, but this was emotional distraught on an entirely different level. Her arms soon gave out as she totally collapsed onto the floor, her forehead pressing against the ground and her hands grasping the carpet desperately between her fingers.
Her sobs eventually died down, until they were little more than slight muffled grunts, more from the fact that her throat was sore than anything else. Her face was wet with waterworks, and she was somewhat happy she hadn’t worn makeup today, it would be totally ruined by now.
“Pinkie, I…” Diane’s voice was resigned, and sounded like her voice was being covered by something. Pinkie raised her head, seeing that Diane was hiding most of her face behind her straight hair, her hand covering her mouth as she seemed to be struggling to stifle her own sobs. “You have no idea what that means to me, I was so worried that you’d hate me for everything and just tell me to disappear. You saying that you’re sorry and that you want to help me is just...alleviating to an extent I can’t even put into words.”
She paused as she lowered her hand, quickly wiping her eyes and letting out a loud sigh. Diane tried putting her hair behind her ears, a few stubborn strains refusing to conform and dangling on her forehead. “However, you can’t help me Pinkie. At least, not how you think. The way I see it, you only have two options. And they’re yours to make. I know it’s a lot of pressure, but...you have to make a choice, no one can do it for you.”
While somewhat unsteady, Diane tried to take on a more serious tone. She was trying to be composed, but it was evident that was extremely difficult for her.
“What…” Pinkie straightened her body, once again sitting on her knees. “Are they?”
“Well, there’s the first, the obvious one. Now that you know the truth, you can…” Her voice lowered abruptly as she gulped, a hint of fear in her eyes. “Reject me. Pretend I don’t exist, eventually I-”
“No.” Pinkie interrupted her, voice blunt and steadfast “That’s not an option. I couldn’t do that to you, or Jason. That’s just…” Pinkie’s head dropped for a moment as she raised her hands, wrapping them around her shoulders as if to hug herself. “Too cruel. Whatever the other choice is, that’s what I’m taking.”
Diane’s lips curled upwards into a small smirk. “I...thought you might say that. The truth is, I’m not even sure the result would be any different, or if those are the only choices we have. I’ve...agonised over this for so long, and yet now that it’s happening, I’m not nearly as much of a train wreck as I thought I’d be.”
“That’s...good, right?”
“Sort of.” Diane shook her head dismissively, placing her left hand against the mirror like she wanted to touch Pinkie. “The only thing left is...to accept me. Accept that I’m a part of you, that while you initially created me just to deal with all your negative emotions, I’ve become something much more than that.”
“What’ll happen...after I do that?”
“I...honestly don’t know. Nothing could happen, and I could still take over whenever you fall asleep. If that happens, we’ll talk about that. Or…” Diane clenched her jaw as she grimaced. “I...might just disappear anyway. I really hope not, but...I still think we should do that. It’s uncertain, but...if I disappear after that, at least I’ll go knowing you accepted me. That’s as close as I could get to being happy.”
“Diane…”
The tone of Diane’s voice made Pinkie’s chest tighten. It reminded her too much of Fluttershy when she would get bullied, not bothering to fight back and just accepting it. She didn’t like it, but this was much different than a high school bully.
In a sense, Diane’s very life was in Pinkie’s hands, and both of them knew it. Diane could cry and beg, but it was ultimately Pinkie’s choice. The weight of this fact hit her like a train, making her entire body shiver with a cold sweat. She remained eerily silent as she tried to organize her thoughts, but it was hard to think without giving in to the overbearing emotions.
Did she accept Diane, even though there was still a very real chance she’d vanish anyway? If she did, she’d have to live with that for the rest of her life, and it would likely break Jason’s heart. She hated that some part of her would be happy. He would then be single and she might have a chance, but she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she did.
“I…” Pinkie murmured as she raised her head, her hands shaking as she struggled to speak. “I want to give you a chance, that’s the least I can do. Even if you disappear, the alternative is much worse. So…” She hardened her gaze, her eyes twinkling with resolve. “What do I do.”
Diane leaned forward, or, at least as much as she could as a distorted reflection. She gently placed both her hands against the mirror, showing the entirety of her palms and spreading her fingers apart.
“I think...if we ‘touch’, something will happen. I don’t know myself, I just have a sort of...directive, I guess? It might be something, or it might not. Honestly, everything about this situation is bizarre.”
Pinkie slowly stood to her feet, her knees wobbling as she struggled to keep her balance. “Yeah, even for me this is bonkers. But...if that’s what you say we should do,” Pinkie hesitantly raised her arms, keeping them to her side as she steadied her hands to remain on level with Diane’s.
Diane responded with a wide smile, which was the last thing Pinkie saw as their hands touched, her vision and senses going completely white.
Epilogue. ( Slightly NSFW)
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. Chapter Five: Phone Fornication. (NSFW)
Author's Note
Yahallo! I was having a bit of a problem deciding what to do with this chapter, mostly because I'd never written a phone sex scene before, and wasn't entirely how to even go about it. I've always been good at planning out big events, but it's the smaller stuff like this I struggle with.
Chapter Five: Phone Fornication. (NSFW)
‘So you prefer pink? That’s good to know, I’ll make sure to remember that. ;)’
Though Jason couldn’t see her, he knew Diane had one of those erotic smirks on her face right now. Even through text he could tell when she was teasing him, not that he minded if she did, it let him know she was still interested in him.
‘I thought you didn’t have a phone? Did you...get a phone just to talk to me?’
If she did get a phone just to talk to him, he’d feel really conflicted. On one hand, he’d be happy that she went that far just to talk to him. On the other hand, he’d feel very bad about her spending that much money on him. He knew she had a job, but still.
However, he did actually like texting, more or less. When he texted people, he sounded normal. There was no eye contact, no feeling obligated to speak so things weren’t awkward, and he couldn’t stutter in text.
‘No, not really. Like I said last night, I didn’t have one because social media’s bad for me. But for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been thinking about getting one for other stuff. I really like listening to music, but my mp3 player is getting too old and there’s some songs I can’t get on it. I also get super bored sometimes and have nothing to do, so having a few games to play would be nice.
Though, if I’m being honest, I did like the idea of being able to talk to you outside of that alleyway. So, you were just the final push, not the only reason. I should also let you know, since I’m usually so busy throughout the day, I probably won’t usually be able to text you till night time, assuming I even can. I should also let you know, you're the only person that has my number, and that I would actually text. So, don’t give my number out to anyone, k?”
He breathed out a sigh of relief, glad he wasn’t the sole reason she bought a phone. That only made him a little less confused, however. He did ask her to give him her number, but when she said no, he didn’t say anything else. So how did she get his number? He started typing and was about to ask her that exact question, before she sent him something else.
*Wow, she’s a fast typer, she must have used to text a lot of people.*
‘Hey, so, I don’t actually like texting all that much. Do you mind if we call? I...prefer to hear your voice.’
Jason was a bit surprised, she seemed so good at texting, he just assumed she liked it. While he was a bit disappointed since he was comfortable with that, it didn’t bother him enough to say no to Diane. He had trouble telling most people no, but with Diane that seemed to be even harder. He started calling her after quickly changing her contact to ‘Diane’, and she picked up almost immediately.
“Diane?”
“I’m here, I was just...doing something.” He heard her whisper, hearing what sounded like a door being shut and locked. “How was your day? I didn’t see you at lunch, Pinkie and her friends too much for you?”
“Well...yeah, they were kind of overwhelming, even for me. I think I’ll be eating my lunch by myself from now on, no offense to any of them. By the way, how did you get my number? I don’t remember giving it to you.”
He heard a slight bouncing noise, which he guessed was her jumping on her bed. She began to shift around, getting comfortable on whatever she was on.
“Can’t tell you, it’s a secret, all girls gotta have a few secrets.” She said teasingly, giving out that adorably devilish giggle of hers. “You know Jason, you sound a bit more confident over the phone. I think I like it.”
*She’s steering the conversation where she wants it to go, I’ve noticed she does this whenever there’s something she doesn’t want to talk about. I get there’s some things she doesn’t want to talk about, but I just wish she’d be more honest with me.*
“Really? I’m just less nervous because I don’t have to worry about eye contact or anything, I don’t think I sound more confident or anything.” Jason said as he gulped, this might have made her upset, but he was worried and felt he needed to ask. “Do you mind if...ask you a personal question?”
“I’m a D cup, my bra size is 41.”
“What? No, not that!’
*Is that big? They certainly felt and looked big, no! Don’t let her throw you off track.”
“I wanted to ask if you...used to have a drinking problem?”
He may not have been able to see her, but it was like he could feel her scowl. He didn’t hear her say anything for a few seconds, he couldn’t even hear her breathing, he wasn’t sure if he’d ever been more tense in his entire life.
“She showed you the pictures, didn’t she?”
It was phrased like a question, but the tone of her voice made it sound like a fact. There was no anger or hostility, not even accusation, her voice was just...blank.
It kind of scared him.
“Y-yeah, she did. Did yo-”
“Of course I knew, they weren’t as subtle about taking pictures of me as any of them would think. I figured people would have told her about me and she’d get curious about what I looked like and asked people to take pictures of me, there’s nothing that girl can’t get if she really wants it. I just didn’t care, if people want to take pictures of me, let them.”
There was more anger in her voice now, which wasn’t much better, but was more comforting than the emptiness it had before. He heard her open and close a drawer or something, she pulled something out, but he couldn’t tell what it was.
“I’m so-”
He heard what sounded like her slapping her phone, and then making a grunting noise. “Shit, I can’t boop you on the nose. Jason, do me a favor and boop yourself on the nose for me.”
He stayed quiet for a few seconds, not entirely sure if he heard her right. When she didn’t say anything, he put the phone between his shoulder and ear and smacked his hands together, hopefully producing a noise that convinced her.
“Good boy. Listen, don’t blame yourself Jason, I don’t want you apologizing everytime you ask a question you didn’t know would bother me. It’s just...that period of time was really rough for me, and thinking about it makes me...upset. I don’t want to talk about it, and I know I said not to ask me about things I don’t want to talk about, but...I need to talk about this, I can’t keep it bottled up. I…”
He heard her stop talking for a moment, even stop breathing like she held her breath. Then he heard her get off her bed, her light footsteps walking across the room and abruptly stopping. The sound of wind blowing as she opened a window, her sharp breath as she deeply exhaled and inhaled.
“I didn’t have a drinking problem, no. I had a lot of problems, and drinking was how I dealt with them. I still have these issues to this day, but I don’t drink anymore, I can tolerate them now. Back then I was...lost, confused, I didn’t know what to do with myself or who I was. I was completely miserable and depressed, I...can’t tell you why exactly. Not yet, I’m not ready. It wasn’t just because of one thing though, there were so many things going through my head then, going through my head now. I hated being alone with my thoughts, so I spent my free time going to parties and getting so drunk I couldn’t think, and then I drank some more.
I do a good job of being composed now, but honestly Jason I’m...still kind of like that. It’s hard for me to get out of bed in the morning, even harder to get through the day just trying to stay positive. I’m not even sure the last time I can remember being genuinely happy.”
There was a deep sadness to her voice, filled with sorrow and regret. He couldn’t imagine what her face looked like right now, maybe it was better that he couldn’t. He had always been terrible at dealing with sad people, he couldn’t even cheer himself up, how could he make others feel better?
The best he can do is try to understand other people's sadness, and help them anyway he can.
He tried to think back to everything they’d talked about, anything she mentioned from her past that would indicate one of things she was talking about. He did recall one thing, it might make her worse, but it was all he had.
“Is one of those things...the boyfriend you talked about?”
He heard her sigh, like he’d brought up a topic she’d been dreading. He heard her set the phone down on the windowsill, a beep noise as she put him on speaker.
“Jason, if I told you that I’ve only ever slept with one person in my life, would you believe me?” She sounded a bit more distant now, but he could still distinctly make out her voice.
He stayed silent for a few moments, believing her meant trusting her, he’d been thinking about that almost all day. It was obvious there were some things Diane was hiding from him, but they all just seemed to be things she was sensitive about. He didn’t know her very well, but she had been nothing but nice to him.
Did he trust her? There was only one answer for that.
“Of course I would, you’re my friend, I trust you.”
She sharply inhaled, as if surprised at what he said. Then she giggled, at least he made her a little less gloom.
“Thank you Jason, that means a lot, I know how hard it is for people like us to trust others.”
He heard her shut the window, another beeping noise as she turned him off speaker and brought the phone back up to her ear. He heard her walk to her bed again, but this time she seemed to just sit on the edge of it instead of laying down.
“I don’t like sex for the pleasure, not just the pleasure, anyway. It’s about intimacy, the feeling of being truly close with someone, the warmth of another person’s body, being trusted and being able to trust someone else like that. Honestly, a lot of the time I'd prefer to cuddle. When I met him, I was easily at the lowest point in my life, I would have done anything to not feel like shit, to feel like I had some purpose in life. He was my first, and only, hookup. He wasn’t my boyfriend so much as someone I exclusively had sex, and that was basically all he wanted me for. He didn’t actually care about me, he didn’t comfort me when I needed it, I was nothing but a living sex toy to him.”
Something flared inside Jason, something he hasn’t felt in a long, long time. Anger.
“You...deserve better than that.” Jason growled, a little surprised at himself.
She didn’t even seem to notice, she laughed in response. It wasn’t a happy laugh, he wasn’t sure how to describe it, but it sounded...somber.
“It’s easy to tell me that, you’ll find it’s a lot harder to convince me it’s true. I don’t value myself very much, a lot less back then. When we had sex, it was the closest I’d ever been to someone, and it was also the happiest I’d ever made someone. I felt like I’d finally found something I could do that’d make other people happy, even if it was just one person. I devoted myself to it, learned everything I could about it. I learned to pleasure him the best way that I could, in any way I could. I let him do whatever he wanted to my body, however he wanted to. I knew then just as I know now that he was just using me, but I didn’t care, I was being useful.
We ‘broke up’ when he lost interest in me, more specifically, when he thought I was sleeping around with other guys. He didn’t believe me when I said I had only gotten so good at sex all the sudden was because I was trying to please him, he was convinced that once I had gotten a taste for sex I became a whore, said that I already had the body of one. Then he just...abandoned me, never talked to me again, like I was trash. Like everything I did for him didn’t mean anything, l-like I-”
Her voice sounded shaky, like she was on the edge of crying. He’d never heard her like that before, she usually sounded at least somewhat confident. Now she sounded so...hurt, he knew that there were some guys in the world who only dated girls for sex, but to hear someone he knew was being treated like that and then just thrown away was...infuriating.
“Diane...you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t-”
“No...I need to, I’m alright.” He heard her mumble, hearing something like sniffling. “After that, I kind of just spiralled out of control. I drank until I passed out, and it eventually took a really bad toll on my body. I ended up having to go to the hospital for alcohol poisoning, the doctors said it was a miracle my liver was even working properly. I couldn’t drink for a while and it forced me to deal with my problems, and I finally...broke down.”
She stayed silent for a few seconds, her breathing sounded erratic again, but it didn’t sound like she was crying.
*Pinkie was right, that girl really is terrifyingly perceptive.*
“After a while I just drifted around, I’d cried until I couldn’t anymore and I had no one to talk to. I stopped going to parties, stopped drinking, I...needed to be alone for a while, being around other people was bad for me, and I was bad for a lot of people. So in my free time when I needed to get away, I’d go to that alleyway, and I haven’t talked to anyone since. Well, until you, anyway.”
Her voice was slowly getting back to normal, she was starting to sound less sad and more like she usually did. Everything she was saying made sense, and it lined up with everything Pinkie said. Even so, he couldn’t help but feel like there were still things she wasn’t telling him, important things.
There was also a question he’s had on his mind for a while, her explanation only brought it to the surface of his mind again.
“Diane, what...am I to you? Are you only interested in having sex with me so you feel useful? Are you just using me to help deal with your insecurities?”
He felt stupid asking her that, even if it were true, he wasn’t sure if she’d give him an answer. But ever since Pinkie told him she might just be using him, it...bugged him, and had been all day. He might not have thought very highly of himself, that didn’t mean he was ok with being used.
“I’d be lying if I said that wasn’t at least a little bit of why, I miss feeling that close to someone and making them happy again. I can’t make you believe me, but I promise you that I’m not doing that with you. If I just wanted sex, there would be easier ways for me to get it than that. As someone who’s been used like that before, I could never do that to you. You..”
She was silent for about a minute, he could just barely hear her shaky breathing. It wasn’t sad as if she were on the verge of crying like before, it was more like she was...afraid. Of what? He didn’t know.
“Mean more to me than that.”
Her voice was raspy and quiet, little more than a whisper, but he could tell she meant it. Hearing her say that made his chest feel warm, for a moment he didn’t know what to say. He’d never felt that he really meant anything to anyone else, sure some people have been friends with him, but he knew most people who were friends in highschool were out of convenience, they didn’t really care about each other. Since he’d never had parents or anyone that was close to him, no one had ever told him they loved him or they cared about him, this was the closest he’d ever heard.
It made him feel very flustered, but...also happy.
“Diane...I...thank you, I care about you too. Even though we haven’t known each other very long, you’ve made an impression on me no one else has.”
“Same here, but it isn’t so much the how long we’ve known each other, I’d say it’s more about what we do in the time we have shared.” She said with a giggle, he could hear her shift around as she laid on her bed. “So, this might be a little weird to ask, but do you mind if I come over to your place tomorrow night?”
“Why do you want to?” He wasn’t upset that she did, just surprised. Surely wherever she lived was better than his dingy apartment, maybe she just didn’t want her sisters knowing about him?
“It’s no problem if you don’t want to, I’ll get it. It’s just...if we’re going to keep doing stuff like we did last night, I’d rather not do it in an alleyway where we might get seen or heard. I might be into a lot of things, but I’m not an exhibitionist.”
He felt his cheeks get hot as he remembered the details of last night, if someone had seen them during that, there was a very good possibility he would have had a heart attack. At the time he wasn’t really worried about it, if his moaning was any indication. Thinking back on it now, he was embarrassed at his lack of shame then.
“No, you’re right. So, do you want me to bring you here tomorrow?”
“Nah, just text me the address. I’ll tell you when I’m on my way.” He heard the sound of her clothes moving around, not able to tell whether she was taking something off or putting something on. “You know Jason, there’s another reason I called you than to talk.”
(Sexy stuff starting here, skip if you want.)
He noticed the sudden erotic tone in her voice, the same one she usually used when she straddled him. Not only that, but her voice shifted a bit and became more husky, like when she’d whisper straight into his ear. He’d never experienced it before, but the feeling of someone’s hot breath on his ear as they licked him was...arousing.
“What...would that be?” Jason asked as he tried to relax, he could feel his member starting to slowly rise at her voice.
“You asked me if I thought about you at all, and I told you only once or twice, that wasn’t a lie. But after last night, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” He heard her breathing pick up, but couldn’t make out what she was doing. “The cute way you move around when I touch you, the way you try to stay quiet just makes me want to try harder to make you moan. Your body is so soft like a girls, you're so warm and nice to touch. The feeling of your cock twitching in my mouth, the warmth of your cum on my tongue and the sweet saltiness of it, the way your body tense up as you unload yourself inside of me. It’s all I’ve been able to think about.”
He could practically feel the desire coming from her voice, she was speaking in the same way she did before they started making out. It sounded like she was breathing directly onto the phone, her shaky breath was almost strained. He could also vaguely hear the sound of something wet being squished, something about it was familiar.
*Is she...fingering herself?*
“It’s left me incredibly hot and bothered, but I can’t exactly do anything about that throughout the day. I couldn’t come to the alleyway tonight because I’ve been busy, so I figured we’d just have to do this instead. That’s why I sent you those pictures earlier, I was hoping to get you into the mood, and it’s also what I’ll be wearing tomorrow.”
“What…” Jason gulped as he felt his cock throbbing in his pants, he slowly reached down with his other hand and began to unbutton them. “Are you wearing now?”
“Socks.”
“Socks?”
“Just. Socks. The kind that goes up to my thighs, they’re pink if you were wondering.”
The idea of Diane being completely naked on her bed, wearing nothing but socks and masterbating to him was too much. He successfully whipped his fully erect penis out, wrapping his hand around the shaft and quickly moving his hand up and down. His breathing was getting erratic and he could feel his entire body getting numbingly warm, he could feel each heart beat throughout his entire body, especially his dick as it throbbed eagerly in his hand.
“Oh my, you’ve gone quiet on me. Are you...playing with yourself? You naughty boy.” She teased, he could hear her fingering get faster.
Jason closed his eyes as he listened to her fast breathing, just barely able to make out the sound of her putting her finger in herself. Her panting and occasional moan was putting him on edge, he didn’t know how much he liked the sound of others moaning until now. He couldn’t stop himself from thinking back to the previous night, focusing on when she was sucking him off. How warm and wet the inside of her mouth felt, the euphoric sensation it gave him when she wrapped her tongue around the tip, the feeling of his mind being overwhelmed with pleasure.
Even thinking about the moments before made him more aroused, the way she licked his body, the feeling of how soft and enjoyable it was to touch her. Her skin was flawless and her figure perfectly shaped, the thought that she was currently pleasuring herself to him made him feel more pride in himself than he thought he ever would.
He didn’t last as long as he usually did, which was likely because of how aroused he was. He couldn’t stop himself from moaning as he came, his baby batter spurting onto his stomach. A few seconds later, he heard Diane make a sound that was a mixture of a squeal and a gasp. The squishing sounds sped up and then stopped, her breathing got faster and more erratic, almost like she was wheezing.
(Sexy stuff over.)
“Well...that was fun.” She whispered, he could hear the sound of her licking something, like a cat when cleaning itself. “I’m sorry this is all we could do tonight, I promise I’ll make it up to you tomorrow. I have to go to sleep now, I suggest you do too, you’re gonna need a lot of energy for tomorrow.”
He heard a clicking noise as she ended the call, and then a dinging noise as she sent him another message. He looked at the phone, blushing as he saw she sent him a picture. It was another picture of Diane, but this time she wasn’t wearing anything, laying naked on her bed. He could see her entire upper body, the picture cutting off at about her belly button. Her bright pink nipples were fully erect, perfectly perky breast of hers without a single flaw was on full display for him. Some parts of her body seemed a bit shiny, like she was sweaty. She was looking up at the camera with a smirk and winking at him, her other hand between her legs past what he could see.
That image was more than enough to arouse him, he felt he could go again if he truly wanted to. But Diane was right, he needed to get to sleep, he felt he’d need every second. He turned his phone off and set it on the nightstand, reaching under his bed and pulling out a roll of paper towels he kept under his bed for emergencies. He cleaned himself and pulled his pants up, throwing the paper towels in a trash in his room.
Right now, Jason was at the most relaxed and most excited he could remember. Usually, he jerked off before bed every night, it made it easier to fall asleep. This time felt special, he didn’t feel an ounce of nervousness or anxiety, not even slightly nervous like he was about anything. The last time he remembered getting excited about anything was probably when Game of Thrones season eight finally came out, and even then it wasn’t like now.
*What a letdown that was.*
He’d expected that when she came over tomorrow, he’d almost dread it, he didn’t know how long he’d actually last in sex or if he’d even be able to pleasure her at all. But considering how considerate and nice she was with him, and that she seemed to understand his inexperience, He didn’t think it’d really bother her.
He had a feeling that tomorrow was going to be the best night of his life.
