Chapters Ratchet and Clank: Nefarious Equine
Somewhere on the edge of the Shadow Sector...
"Lawrence! What's going on!? You said we were coming within range of a space station!!"
"Well we were sir... How was I to know it would suddenly explode?"
"LAAAAAAAAAWREEEENCE!!! *bzzt* Oh, Janice!... It's been so long. Too long! Say you'll leave me again for that nasty villain Englebert!
Oh Lance! You make me feel like a young boy again!
...Say what?"
"Again, we should really get that fixed..." Thunk!
Both Dr Nefarious and his servant Lawrence continued to drift through space, passing several lush planets and a rather large blue star. Even a battle cruiser neglected to notice the chunk of rock that held two of the galaxies most notorious robots. But far in the distance lay a lone black hole, it's hunger consuming everything within range. The chunk of rock began to stretch and bend as the waves of force threatened to stretch them apart like the galaxies most painful rubber band.
"Lawrence?! Save me!"
"I'm sorry sir, but it seems we are trapped in it's gravitational pull..."
"I will annihilate that foolish lombax if I ever return!! YEEAARRGGGHHH!" His metallic body was pulled into a long string of particles, disappearing into the black abyss before them.
The vortex failed to obliterate the two mechanical beings as they tumbled through the tunnel of electric blue energy. For what seemed like eons they drifted through the endless space that spanned every direction. A small hole appeared in the unstable fabric of the wormhole, a single sun drifted around a much smaller planet, its surface resembling that of the planet Novalis.
Dr Nefarious felt his body begin to revert to it's original state as the duo fell into the gravitational pull of the planet far below. The speed they traveled would burn up any organic in several seconds, but the good doctors hard carbonox armor would protect him from the overwhelming heat.
Meanwhile on the surface of Planet Equis,
"Twilight? Don't you think we should just pack up now... I doubt some alien craft is gonna crash land near Ponyville..."
"But Spike, many scholars have records of strange lights and ponyless carriages, They can't all be wrong!"
Spike simply shook his head, one minute his mentor was going on about Pinkie's kooky powers being unscientific, the next searching for aliens through a single small telescope.
"Ooh a shooting star! Quick Spike, hand me my notebook!"
"Here, Twilight!"
Twilight Sparkle began to mumble softly to herself, "Alright so we have a trajectory speed of four hundred kilometers, at a distance of eight thousand feet and dropping fast... Headed in a straight line for... Spike, run! It's headed our way!"
Spike didn't have to be told twice, swiftly he grabbed all the tools scattered on the ground and made a mad dash to the thick trees surrounding the grassy field.
"Come on, Twilight!"
"Just a sec..." Twilight wrote down a simple message and galloped toward the safety of the trees. Mere moments later came the harsh sounds of screaming as a strange mechanic being slammed headfirst into the earth. A large crater appeared where the object had struck. This was followed by another metallic creature that crashed into the first in a pile of mechanical limbs.
Twilight stepped forward slightly, a small claw grabbed her by the foreleg. She turned around to see her assistant shaking his head profusely and mouthed the words, Don't be stupid! Twilight shrugged and gave Spike a reassuring smile. Slowly she trotted out from the trees and held up a simple message written on her notebook.
Dr Nefarious rose from the crater and stared in disbelief at the strange four-legged squishy that followed his every move. A small sign in her hooves read, Hi, I'm Twilight Sparkle! Welcome to the wide world of Equis!
"WHAT?! A SQUISHY TRYING TO MAKE GOOD WITH ME?! I AM DR NEFARIOUS YOU PEA-BRAINED HOOFED SQUISHY! I WILL ANNIHILATE YOU! Lawrence!"
"Yes sir?"
"Kill it!"
"We sort of lost our weapons when Agent Ratchet defeated us..."
"WHAT?! WHAT DO I PAY YOU FOR?"
"Pay, sir?"
"SHUT UP!"
Twilight shrunk back at the alien that somehow knew Equestrian and wanted to annihilate her. She never thought she would meet an alien... Let alone a robot who wanted to destroy her.
"Hi, please don't hurt me... I come in peace, see?" Twilight held her hoof out in a gesture of trust.
The doctor stared for a long time at the hoof extended towards him in peace. He groaned loudly and took it in a rough hoofshake. While he was borderline powerless he decided that an alliance would aid him for awhile.
"Twilight... I am the great Dr Nefarious, evil mastermind and hated villain of the Solana Galaxy. Soon your species will bask in my robotic glory!"
"A umm pleasure to meet you...Doctor. Spike come out and say hello to this... Err alien?"
"Robot!"
"Right, robot..."
A small pinkish-purple reptile watched in quiet fear at these strange metal creatures, He gulped loudly and grasped the strange metallic claw in a friendly clawshake. The Doctors bright red eyes doing nothing to alleviate the small dragons fear. Lawrence stood behind him, silently plucking his guitar and paying little attention to the hoofed aliens.
"Take me to your leader at once! I wish to discuss the matter of space transport!"
"Umm we don't have spacecraft yet..."
"WHAAAA- *bzzt* Janice you're a he?"
"Sorry to disappoint but, I am actually Jamie!"
"Your brother? Wait you don't have a brother... Well that explains the bathroom breaks..." *Clunk* "-AAAAATTTTT?!"
Twilight gave a long confused stare at the robot in front of her. She turned to the one named Lawrence and asked, "Does he always do that?"
"Yes, ever since he was defeated by his arch nemesis he has had this strange glitch, luckily a smack to the head clears it right up. To be honest it's pretty much the one joy I get out of life... Right sir?"
"Lawrence, I'm warning you!"
"Right... Shall we go with this lavender colored squishy?"
"Fine, but only if I get to ride it into town!"
"No! I am not just some steed!" Twilight lifted the robot off the ground and carried him in a large field of magic. "Stay in there till you behave!"
"You dare imprison Dr Nefarious!? I will annihilate you!"
Back in the Solana Galaxy our grand heroes Ratchet and Clank were taking a much needed holiday on the water planet Aquatos. Clank was folded up into a box-like shape, his light robotic snores the only sound in the small room. Out in the deep water Ratchet was enjoying a swim with his new *friend* Hydro Girl. Luckily his O2 mask can last almost indefinitely, recycling that stale air and replacing it with a mixture of pine fresh air. Ratchet fumbled with his words as he chatted with the blue alien swimming beside him.
"So about that umm date you were talking about? Well I-"
""
"You lost Nefarious? He was on a floating rock, where could he go? Damn it Qwark... You interrupted my holiday!"
""
*Sigh* "I'll be at the Phoenix in a few hours!"
"What's up Ratchet?" Asked Hydro Girl, her blue eyes fixed on the floating lombax.
"Sorry Hydro, but Dr Nefarious has somehow vanished... I gotta go check all the commotion."
"Oh... Well feel free to visit my apartment anytime you want... It's been fun!" She gave Ratchet a sly wink and drifted into the warm currents surrounding her living quarters.
With a reddish tinge to his cheeks, Ratchet swam back to the air-lock and unlocked the hatch leading to the apartment. The air-lock slid open, revealing the inactive form of his buddy Clank.
"Clank? Clank! Wake up!"
"Hmm energy equals mass squared?"
"We got a... umm emergency on our hands!"
"An emergency? What has Qwark done this time Ratchet?"
"Oh you know, just losing our old pal Nefarious...."
"Oh dear..."
"Yeh, tell me about it."
Within an hour they had packed all the necessary equipment and boarded their trusty spacecraft, colored in the Lombax print paint job. The ship reverted to space flight as it breached the oceans surface, its trajectory now locked to one of the galaxies most advanced war fighters, The Starship Phoenix.
A few hours later they had reached the Starship and entered the Q-force meeting being held on the bridge.
"Reports say that a large rock carrying Doctor Nefarious has vanished without a trace, many think he may have teleported away or been picked up as a hitchhiker by a box-like ship. I, Captain Qwark believe he may have escaped into another galaxy through the use of an illegally acquired Rift Inducer!"
"Umm yeh, kinda think that would, you know destroy him..."
"Ratchet, you must head out to the Maney Way Galaxy, where sources tell me he may have escaped to. Here are the co-ordinates to Planet Equis within the Horsehead Nebula."
"But... Wait I'm going with just Clank again? Aren't you meant to be a great hero?"
"Well I... Am joining you on this perilous mission!"
"Say what?"
"Together we will, you know place the doctor in custody and prove once again that I... Err I mean we... Are the heroes that everyone loves! But not the ones they need right now."
"Huh?"
"Oh, nothing..."
So without further delay the three heroes squeezed into the now tightly packed ship and started up the powerful, gravimetric warp drive. Clank gave Ratchet the all clear as the ship began to power-up. With a loud sonic boom the ship launched into warp speed, sending it through space in all of 3.6 seconds. Far below them was a lush planet that reminded Ratchet of several planets he visited over his four major adventures.
"Well we're here... Qwark do you have any clue where to land?"
"Errr...."
"Perfect!" Ratchet face-palmed in sheer annoyance and requested the computer to find a landing destination. The gravitational pull began to steer the ship off course.
"What the? The gravities to strong, how do we break through it Clank?"
"It would appear we have lost all control of the ship... I suggest we brace for impact."
"Talk about deja vu..."
An explosion filled the night air above Canterlot, a large flaming object fell toward the center of the garden within. From inside his statue Discord began to scream, here he was trapped in stone awaiting the inevitable explosion from the debris.
(Oh Goody, defeated by the Elements of Harmony and now crushed by a molten rock!)
The object veered to the right, narrowly avoiding Discord and crashing nose first into the castle wall.
(Hah! Celestia's gonna love fixing that...)
Alarms began to ring as a hundred guards poured into the castle grounds, they glared at the motionless form of Discord and breathed a sigh of relief that it was not his doing. From above the majestic form of Princess Luna appeared as a large silhouette as she descended to the hard earth.
"What hath struck our castle so? My sister stirs restlessly at the sounds of crunching metal."
"This strange object your highness, it fell from the sky and struck the outer wall!"
The princess of the night stepped forward and surveyed the crumpled object. With a loud whoosh the cockpit swung open, three strange figures fell out and rolled several feet to rest beneath Luna's hooves.
"What in Tartarus are thou strange creatures from beyond the heavens? I see thee carry a metallic golem, do thou come in peace?"
"Urgh... Huh, what the?" Ratchet fell backwards and stared at the strange four-legged alien with wings and horn. His mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, the strange sight keeping his words silent.
"Are thou some sort of feline creature?"
"Errr ummm, I'm a lombax, from the Planet Veldin of the Solana Galaxy. The golem you refer to is my good friend Clank... His a robot. And the big fat guy is Captain Qwark."
"What is this country thou speakest of? We have never heard of such a place!"
"An earthbound species? Just perfect... Clank, buddy... I could use your assistance!"
The small robot awoke in a slight daze, his eyes focused on Ratchet,
"Ratchet, who are you talk- Oh, them.... It would appear they are a type of equine creature, though unlike any we have encountered in Solana. The large blue one appears to be some sort of royal hierarchy."
"We art the Princess of the Night!" The princess rose graciously and revealed her power over the moon.
"Amazing, it would appear that they can manipulate the moon with some sort of remote technology."
"It is the magic of Equestria!"
"Uh-huh..." Ratchet rolled his eyes at the mention of magic and proceeded to awaken the unmoving form of Captain Qwark.
"What? Where am I? Ratchet, are we dead?"
"No we are not dead you moron! We are stranded on a planet full of..."
"We are ponies, strange creature!"
Ratchet stifled a laugh as he heard the name spoken aloud. "P-ponies, and they are kinda primitive."
"Primitive? Thou dare insult a princess?"
"Oh right your royalty, oops!"
"Guards! I want these misfits imprisoned for destroying royal grounds! They will stay there until my sister has judged them for herself."
"Hey! Wait a minute you can't just arrest-"
A pair of metallic handcuffs were placed over his hands, locking into place around his wrists.
"You did..."
The three heroes were pulled to their feet and escorted to the dank, wet dungeon far below. The doors were bolted shut with a loud clang of metal. Clank sat himself on the bed and gave Ratchet a grin, "Luckily I brought the Bouncer with us this time. You can thank me later."
"Well thanks Clank, I Captain Qwark will free us from imprisonment!"
"Give me that!" Ratchet yanked the deadly weapon from the Captains bumbling hands and directed it towards the right wall.
"Well, here goes nothing!"
Ratchet and Clank: Nefarious Equine
Princess Celestia awoke relatively early, some loud commotion had occurred an hour ago several floors down. She watched as Luna slowly descended the moon beneath the horizon. She yawned loudly and stretched her longs legs out, her knees popped slightly as her joints became lax. Slowly Celestia rose out of bed and proceeded to call for her morning coffee.
"The night can last just a little longer, Luna always waking me up with some stupid *criminal activities*. Just once I want to sleep in peace, but of course it must be on a Sunday... A Sunday!"
*Kaboom!* "What in the-?!" A loud explosion rocked the foundations of the castle, several smaller compact explosions rang out from the initial blast.
"I am going to kill Luna when I work out what the *bleep* is going on!"
The princess of the sun galloped through the halls, her face etched with an expression of unwavering hate. In Equestria there is but one simple word of advice... Do not awaken the princess before her coffee, hell hath no fury like a sleep-addled Celestia.
The dungeon door was blasted away with magic revealing three cells, that shared one common trait. The wall behind them was nothing more then a smoking crater, all that was left was a small puddle of yellow liquid left by some sort of giant gorilla. Celestia shouted her sisters name in the ear-splitting volume of the Royal Canterlot Voice. Several heads around the city were raised at this strange occurrence. Last time Celestia had used that voice was Sombra's Mexicolt stand-off and Chili Eating Contest. Those days were dark indeed for toilets.
Luna appeared almost instantly, her face aghast at the sheer destruction of the prison wall.
"Luna! What is the meaning of this?!"
"Illegal aliens..."
"So this is about racism?"
"No, we mean criminal space aliens."
"Really? Your kidding me, right?"
"We can show thou the strange flying craft now embedded in the outer perimeter... But first we must seek out these fugitives, obviously they have access to powerful magic."
"You didn't check them for weapons or spells did you?"
"Well, no but-"
*Sigh* "This is why you shouldn't be in the justice system... Considering that is EXACTLY how Discord escaped..."
Luna gave a guilty grin to her sister and scuffed her hoof on the cob-webbed floor, "Well where would the fun be if they stayed locked up?"
"I. Must. Resist. Urge. To. Kill. Sister..."
While these events were taking place, Twilight had managed to hook Dr Nefarious to a strange device. The Doctor yanked and thrashed at the rope bonds, but the pink aura around it kept it excessively tight.
"What are you doing? I will annihilate you!"
"Just a little experiment... Lawrence here has been a great help!"
"Sorry sir, but I haven't had this much fun in ages!"
"Lawrence! Your meant to be MY servant, not some foul little squishies accomplice!"
Lawrence simply shrugged and pulled a large lever attached to the rather large machine. A massive arc of electricity coursed through the Doctor's metallic skeleton.
"LAAWWWRRREEENNCCEE! WAIT WHY HAS MY GLITCH STOPPED?"
Twilight turned to face Nefarious and gave him a pleasant smile.
"I managed to revert your glitchy programming and upgraded your weakened state, you are now better then new. Here let me just release the rop-"
"MWAHAHAHA YOU FOOLISH SQUISHY!! NOW I CAN RELEASE MY HOLOGRAM ATTACK!"
Nefarious jumped of the chair he was attached to and threw a hologram at Twilight, grabbing her with his sharp claws. Twilight tried to blast him with magic, but a small energy shield protected him from arcane blasts.
"Lawrence for once you make me proud!"
"Thank you sir, perhaps we could make a robotic clone of the feisty little... Squishy?"
"Good thinking!" Nefarious held Twilight at arms length, her breath ragged from the clamped claw around her neck.
"Hey, don't look so gloomy, being a robot is fun! Mwahaha!"
"You- your evil!"
"I think I remember saying I'm the most hated villain in Solana,,, here see, I'm on the cover of Super-villain Weekly."
He held up a small magazine, the cover was adorned with a photo of the Doctor. Behind him was a gigantic robot that appeared to be a ball with an orange *eye*. Below the picture were the words, New in makeover technology, become the robot of your dreams and leave your squishy flab behind! The new and improved Biobliterator, now with transforming death mech capabilities!
"Personally I think they overplayed the whole makeover bit... Guess they never heard of Helga the fitness trainer, she's fatter then a Momma Tyhrranoid before kids!"
Twilight simply stared into his red eyes and gulped at what was about to occur.
"Lawrence, hand me a screwdriver, lets give this equine squishy a new chassis! Mwahahaha!"
Ratchet and Clank fled into the forest, the castle now far off in the distance. From behind them came a very out of breath Qwark.
"Could... We... Just... Take a little...nap. Last time I did this much running was last weeks Blargian Snaggle-beef casserole... That stuff goes...through...me like-"
"Well that sure explains the terrible smell from Deck B... Ratchet I must warn you, Qwark has disgusting flatulence issues."
"Oh joy, wait whats that- Uggh...think I'm gonna be sick!"
"Oops, sorry!"
"Man it's worse then that swamp beast thing from Oozla and that thing was foul! Clank... You wouldn't happen to have my 02 mask handy?"
"Here!"
"Oh thank the sweet air for that!" Ratchet released a large breath, the cool fresh air quickly vaporizing the stench.
A circle of yellow eyes peered at the gang, their hungry howls ringing out across the land. Ratchet took a step back as a large pack of wolves surrounded them. He stared for some time before he noticed they were made of wood.
"Wooden wolves? Well this should be easy." Ratchet pulled out his trusty Pyrocitor and began to cover the timber-wolves in a jet of flame.
They yelped and cracked as the fire quickly left them as smoldering corpses. Ratchet tried to collect his reward but no bolts came, it appeared such currency did not exist in this galaxy. The gang turned away and wandered further into the forest, unaware of the large pile of wood quickly forming into a giant wolf.
"Raawwwrrr!!"
"Oh that can't be good..." Ratchet spun around and saw a giant version of the creatures he defeated barreling towards him in animal rage.
"Typical... You think you've beaten all the enemies and some bigger, meaner one shows up."
Qwark simply cowered in fear and watched Ratchet and Clank battle the vicious beast. Ratchet pulled out his powerful Gravity Bomb and launched three projectiles towards the giant timber-wolf. Each shot blew out a chunk of wood and toppled the beast onto the hard ground, where it splintered into a thousand pieces. Several sparkly coins were magnetized to his wrench on defeat, it appeared that this galaxy had a different currency.
"That was kinda a wooden battle don't ya think?"
Clank just stared at Ratchet, he was used to his friends bad jokes but this was not even worth a chuckle. Ratchet scratched the back of his head and shrugged,
"Yeh I know... Anyway, let's try to find a way out!"
For hours on end they wandered through the dense forest, the constant whining from Qwark doing nothing to alleviate the frustrations of being lost. Several nasty critters had tried to attack the group but were easily thwarted with a single shot from the Rift Inducer. Ratchet stared at the large sum of coins he collected and wondered what weapons he could buy at the nearest vendor. He continued to wander aimlessly till Clank noticed a break in the trees behind them.
"Ratchet I believe I have found us a way out!"
"Finally, any more of Qwark's complaints and I may have just turned him into a sheep..."
"Hey! Is that a house? Mind if I do the introductions?"
"Sure, if you get captured I wont have to haul your lard ass around..."
The Captain puffed out his chest and wandered over to the front entrance. He raised a meaty hand and rapped his knuckles against the wooden door.
"Just a minute... Angel Bunny please be patient, we have guests..."
The door opened slowly, revealing a yellow pony with a pair of wings growing from her back. She turned towards the large figure before her and let out a blood-curdling scream, slamming the door on Qwark's chin.
"Way to go Qwark! Your heroic charm worked wonders..." Ratchet shoved Qwark out of the way and called softly,
"Hey umm you in there, we just wish to talk... Sorry if my friend startled you but believe me... That's usually my reaction when I wake up with his face staring at me..."
"I-is it s-safe to c-come out?" Asked a light voice, the question barely reaching his ears.
"Sure, we come in friendship and peace!" Ratchet stared at the large wrench in his hand and decided to put it away out of sight, the frightened pony would probably cower in fear at the large tool.
Once again the door opened, a very shy pony stared at the strange cat-like creature with a pleasant smile on his face,
"Umm hi...I'm Fluttershy..."
"Huh?"
"I'm Fluttershy..."
"Hi, Cluttersly!"
"Umm no it's Fluttershy..."
"Oh Fluttershy... Well that makes more sense... I'm Ratchet, nice to meet you!" The lombax extended his hand, shaking Fluttershy's hoof as she slowly smiled.
"Umm, well you can come in...i-if you like..."
"Sure, Clank! Qwark! This here is Fluttershy, shes inviting us to stay for awhile!"
Fluttershy gave a large gulp at the strange monkey wearing a green suit, still a little shook up from earlier. She noticed a small silver creature surveying her house and thought he looked quite cute.
"This is Qwark, who you've already met and this is my good friend Clank. Who is a robot or as your kind is known to call them, a golem."
"Oh my, he looks quite handsome..."
"Thank you, ma'am! I see that you are an animal caretaker? We have chickens and sheep back in our own galaxy, though many of them aren't willing..."
"G-galaxy? Your aliens?! Oh wow, I've never met space aliens before!"
"It would seem that these *ponies* are the predominant life form on this planet, but are yet to accomplish spaceflight.."
"Yeh I kinda figured that..."
"Also my sensors have detected vast amounts of Raritanium are found here..."
"Any trace of Nefarious?"
"Not yet."
Fluttershy shivered at the name, to her ears it sounded like some kind of villain. Discord wasn't so bad anymore but Fluttershy was still scared of funny sounding strangers.
Angel glared at the trio as they stepped into the small cottage. The bunny hated new people, especially when none of them were ponies and one was tall enough to bump the ceiling. He tapped his foot in annoyance that his lunch was now five minutes late.
Ratchet stared in wonder at the cottage, every manner of feathered, furry and scaly critter seemed to make the residence their home. Outside was a chicken coop filled with a dozen or so chickens, happily pecking at the tiny worms that crawled across the dirt.
"I love your house, nice and quaint... Very different from the quarters on The Phoenix..."
"The Phoenix?"
"Oh yeh, that's our... Well kinda our mother ship. We get our missions and stuff from there..."
"Oh wow! Spaceships sound very... Umm different."
"Yep... So what type of umm pony are you?"
"I'm a Pegasus!"
"Oh ok, so there's...?"
"Three kinds... Well four if you count the princesses. Earth Ponies, who have no magical abilities and no wings or horn. The Pegasus, most of us prefer the sky but flying frightens me... Unicorns are the big magic users, instantly recognizable by the horn on their heads. And the Alicorns which share all three abilities. What about you three?"
"Well the Captain here has never actually told us what he is, guessing something about his *secret* identity."
Qwark had sat down on the couch and was now fast asleep, Angel trapped in his arm like a soft toy.
"Awww, he likes Angel... How sweet!"
"Yeh...sweet... And you already know what Clank is so... I'm a lombax and I have no idea where my species lives."
"Oh, well that must be hard."
"Not really, By the way have you maybe seen a blue robot who yells at everything?"
"Can't say I have... Maybe my friend Twilight knows...."
Spike returned from a nice lunch with Rarity to find the library in complete disarray. Hundred's of books lay scattered and torn, the building smelt of oil and grease. From the basement came the sounds of maniacal laughter and Twilight's panicked voice. Spike threw open the door and took the stairs two at a time. As he reached the bottom stairs he noticed what appeared to be a clone of Twilight, laying on a table next to the one who bucked and kicked as another jolt of electricity rocketed through her.
"Let her go you big meanie!" Spike charged towards Nefarious and tried to whack him in the head with a book. *Thunk!*
"Ow! You actually hurt me you filthy squishy! I should annihilate you, but first we're going to try something... Which of these is you real friend?"
"That's easy the one on the right! Now give me back Twilight!"
"Ok, here you go!" Nefarious unlocked the bindings around Twilight and watched as the little reptile hugged his mentor.
"Excellent!" The doctor put his hands in a gesture similar to that of a certain Simpson's character.
"Just like that, your letting us go?"
"Of course, we were just... Upgrading some hardware....MWAHAHAHA!"
"Oook...." Spike supported Twilight as he returned to the upper floor of the library, he turned to say his thanks but they both disappeared before he could utter a single word.
"Oh by the way, Hope you enjoy Twilight's...additions! Sir, perhaps next time we just skip the lame puns?"
"LLLAAAWWWRRREEENNNCCCEEE! Turn off the comm-link you moron! Before he works out where we are!"
"Of course, sir!"
The young dragon wondered briefly if he should write a letter to the princess but decided that no permanent harm had been done...
Ratchet and Clank: Nefarious Equine
"Hey Twilight? You got any ink I can borrow?" Asked the bright pink pony hopping constantly as if her life depended on it.
"Affirmative, I have that item. Please stand by while I retrieve requested object. Spike, my assistant shall bring them to you shortly. Please come in and enjoy a refreshment or light snack. Respond kindly, how are you Pinkie Pie?"
"Twilight, have you gone loopy again? How many times must we say it... You are not tardy!"
"Yes, I feel out of sorts... How would I act normally in conversation?"
Pinkie gave Twilight a once over and wondered why her hair was sharp as a knife, she continued to stare incredulously at the unicorn who seemed to have replaced her friend. Her pink body shivered violently warning her that something big was going on. That's when they began to notice the fearful shouts throughout the town. A blue streak glided through an open window and began shouting about strange creatures and tiny golems.
"Twilight, we have a situation on our hands! A group of strange guys has wandered into town with Fluttershy in tow.... I think they're keeping her hostage!"
"Does one of them resemble a striped rodent?"
"Yeh, but what's that got to do with anything?"
"I want them annihilated!"
"Errr isn't that a tad extreme?"
"Just follow my orders Rainbow Dash, we have bad guys to defeat!"
"Aww yeh!"
Outside Fluttershy tried to hide her face, she felt embarrassed by the way Ponyville handled strangers who weren't ponies. Everywhere she went doors were locked shut, windows covered and children pulled inside away from the newcomers.
"Umm everypony? Don't be afraid... Their really friendly and are just here looking for someone!" Fluttershy tried to carry her voice but her silent words simply went unheard. Feeling defeated, she proceeded to escort the trio to Twilight's house. She hoped that the lavender unicorn could persuade the others to give the strangers a chance.
The door of the library was thrown open, Twilight was standing in the doorway with a scowl on her face. From behind her came a blue streak that charged headfirst towards Ratchet.
"Rainbow Dash! Stop!"
Ratchet saw the blurred outline of a pegasus heading directly for them, he contemplated on which weapon he should use and settled on his Plasma Whip. Quickly he pulled it out and crouched low to the ground, as the distance closed between them he threw it forward. Rainbow Dash saw it far to late as she felt a searing slap against her face, the whip sent her flying back several feet. She attempted to get up but was thwarted by the foot of the large one in green.
Ratchet stepped forward and offered his hand to the dazed pegasus. Rainbow Dash glared at the lombax but took his outstretched hand anyway, she opened her mouth to say something but was cut off by Twilight.
"Stand back pegasus, they are mine!" Her horn began to glow with a large ball of pinkish electricity that was launched directly towards the lombax.
Hey wait! I'm on your side! Ratchet dropped a single Holo-shield and ducked behind it as the ball of energy struck it directly. The shield guarded from the attack but disintegrated upon impact. He pulled out his Tesla Claw and shocked Twilight's body, sending her into violent convulsions. A single spark shot from her head and revealed what Ratchet had suspected. The unicorn before him was a robotic impostor.
"Hey why'd you do that to Twilight!?" Shouted Spike as he ran forward to help his mentor up.
"She is a robot!"
Spike snorted and stared at the unconscious unicorn lying on the ground, "I think I would've noticed that by now!" Twilight began to stir, she grabbed Spike and whispered into his ear.
"His a fugitive, the princesses are searching for them right now! Run inside and send a letter, I'll handle them!"
"Ok Twilight, be careful!"
The fake Twilight stood up and turned to face Ratchet, "Nice try but Nefarious gave me a few upgrades to test out!"
Rainbow Dash stared at Twilight, who was this Nefarious she mentioned and why is she so aggressive? Surely that furry thing can't be right...
"I defeated your master and his army of Tyhrranoids, I'm sure I can deal with you!"
"STOP THIS AT ONCE! LAY DOWN YOUR WEAPONS OR WE WILL BE FORCED TO USE EXCESSIVE AMOUNTS OF MAGIC!" The sun burst through the clouds, a pure white figure stood in a beam of light. Her armor was golden with a purple gem, it appeared to Ratchet that this was royalty.
"Wah!" Captain Qwark began to run away but was thwarted by a large field of energy, sending him back ten feet onto his stomach. "Ratchet help! I'm to handsome to be in prison!"
"Oh be quiet Qwark, have some dignity, man! Oh right... You sort of lack in that department!"
"ENOUGH! LAY DOWN YOUR ARMS IMMEDIATELY, RESISTANCE IS NOT A WISE CHOICE!"
"Damn it, imprisoned twice in two days.... Do I look like that much of a criminal?"
Celestia landed before the three prisoners and gave them a fierce growl, her face was etched with coffee withdrawal. Her right eye constantly twitched as she demanded the truth from those beneath her hooves,
"WHAT IS YOUR PURPOSE HERE?" Said the princess, her Royal Canterlot voice shattering several windows as she continued to scream
"Woah, calm down your majesty! We are looking for an evil mastermind that somehow ended up on this world and our ship crash-landed due to the immense gravity emanating from this planet."
"LIES!"
"Luna, quiet! You didn't even question them earlier! I may be very short today but I still must uphold a code of ethics. "
"One thing, the unicorn Twilight? She is a fake!"
"MY APPRENTICE IS NOT A FAKE, I WOULD SEE IT WITH MY OWN EYES IF IT WERE TRUE... MY MAGIC WOU-"
"Well this isn't magic, its technology... Probably undetectable by your powers!"
"LUNA TAKE THEM AWAY!"
"WAIT!!!" All eyes turned to the young pegasus who had shouted. Fluttershy blushed a vivid crimson as she felt everypony around stare directly at her.
"Yes Fluttershy?"
"Umm p-please don't put them in jail, they aren't here to cause trouble I swear. I wanted to introduce them but nopony would listen... Twilight's the one who attacked first!"
"Is this true, Twilight Sparkle?"
"Of course not, Fluttershy is lying her little head off!"
"Excuse me?"
"Fluttershy is a filthy liar!"
Celestia narrowed her eyes at her apprentice and asked a simple question, "This sentence is false."
"What?" The fake Twilight slowly became nervous as she contemplated the question.
"This sentence is false!"
"Error! Umm *cough* I'm perfectly.. F..i..n..e, just a bit of a cough. *bzzt* Paradox Detected, begin emergency shutdown sequence! Nooooo! Oh sh-!" Shrapnel flew everywhere as the fake Twilight exploded in a large ball of fire.
Celestia stood with mouth agape, once again she had failed to detect a fake. A sheepish smile rose to her lips as she turned to face the prisoners.
"Umm I think I owe you an apology..."
"WHAT ARE THOU DOING!? THEY DESTROYED ROYAL PROPERTY AND DISRESPECTED THEIR SUPERIOR!"
"Oh put a cap on it Luna, this was obviously a misunderstanding. Now release the prisoners so that we may discuss what their purpose is."
"Fine...!"
"Good girl."
Deep within the underground caverns below Equestria, the Diamond Dogs had begun to mine a rare yellow metal that had never been seen amongst the packs. Each rare node found seemed to contain some magical properties. The dogs began to barter and trade the metal, searching for the biggest pieces they could find. Today the ring-leader of their operation Rover was inspecting the wide fields where they had found the annoying unicorn Rarity. Hoping that another gem finder might stumble upon their territory. His eyes went wide at the tall blue humanoid that wandered into view, behind him was another humanoid, this one silver with a sort of suit attached to the metal skin.
"LAWRENCE?! WHERE IS THE RARITANIUM YOU KEEP MENTIONING?"
"Beneath us sir, where most precious metals are known to congregate..."
"Quiet! I hear something over there! You, in the bushes! Come to me and I'll be less inclined to annihilate you!"
Nervously the lone Diamond Dog stepped forward, his eyes locked on the metallic form. The Doctor stood higher then any dog he knew and had a large gun pointed directly at his face.
"Where is the raritanium?"
"Raritanum? What is that? Is it a shiny?" A gravely voice asked, his horrible language skills sending spittle flying onto Nefarious metallic skin.
"Hey watch it! I just got this buffed to perfection! I hate squishies and their foul liquids! It is a yellow metal you dumb mutt, have you seen any?"
"You pay Rover in gems yes?"
"What?! Do I look like I've got gems?! Give me the raritanium now, before I use my new weapon against you!"
The diamond dog simply gave the doctor a blank stare, reminding Nefarious of the Tyhrranoids that he had hired a few years ago. He began to scream in frustration at the dumb squishy before him and blasted him with the gun held at his temple. The large dog fell to the ground and watched as his flesh turned to metal. He began to cry in fear at the experience but quickly became cold and logical as his mind became that of a machine..
"Reporting for duty, sir! The metal you seek is contained within these caves... My kind will much appreciate this transformation, the rest are simply moronic squishies that I could care less about!"
"Mwahahaha! I think I have found my new army Lawrence! Soon I will obliterate Ratchet and the entire galaxy! You, what is your kind?"
"We are Diamond Dogs, master! Our mission is to serve you!"
"Lawrence! Follow him and make sure he obeys, I must find one of these large reptilian beasts. Perfect for aerial units!"
"At once, sir!"
Ratchet explained all the details of his adventures, from thief's and corrupt chairmen to an infection of protopets and a robotic madman. Rainbow Dash was impressed that he had survived the harsh challenges of Dreadzone and became the fan favorite around the galaxy.
When both princesses were satisfied they began to explain everything about Equestria and the evil villains who had tried to take over. Fluttershy sat between the two parties explaining that she wielded a magic know as the Elements of Harmony, and that her's was kindness.
"So know that we know what you are... Why have you come here?"
Ratchet pulled out a small box that revealed a hologram of Nefarious standing before a large machine.
"This is Dr Nefarious and he has fled to this planet, we need to find him asap before he can plan another world domination. Do you know of anyone matching his description?"
The newly freed Twilight gave him a look that said, well duh! And proceeded to explain the plans he had in mind.
"He wants to turn Equestria into machines? I must insist Ratchet, that these four accompany your group. Another two ponies shall join you shortly... We must stop Nefarious and his ev-"
*Crack! Boom!*
Outside in the castle gardens was a gray pegasus with a cutie mark of bubbles on her flank. Within her mouth was a large flail that swung back and forth as she flew awkwardly around the grounds. Her eyes pointed in different directions, revealing a strange statue shaped like Discord. She tried to say something to the trapped figure but the weapon slid from her grasp and struck the ground with a heavy thud and a slight tremor.
(What is this pegasus doing? She's going to squash me with that thing!)
The cross-eyed pegasus giggled at the large crack in the earth, she lifted the flail back up and began to spin. The sheer momentum caused by the weapon sent her flying like a helicopter. The force of the spin sent her back towards the statue, which now began to scream as a large metallic ball hurtled through the air and smashed into the platform he stood upon. The fall was only short but the stone encasing him shattered into a million pieces. Discord laughed at his new predicament,
"First Fluttershy buddies up with me and now little miss Derpy let's me run free...again. Thank you, Derpy! Your chaotic nature is something to be proud of."
Derpy gave Discord a broad smile and tried to hug the unprepared draconequus.
"Thank you, Mister... Can I have one of those chocolate milk candy clouds?"
Discord stared into the pegasus eyes and groaned at the adorable ponies question. He snapped his fingers and a small pink cloud appeared and began to rain chocolate milk upon Derpy. He laughed as the gray pegasus wallowed in the large puddle that had formed around her. With a single awww, Discord teleported to where he felt the presence of another chaotic form beginning to emerge.
"Looks like I've got company! Time for some fun! Haha!"
Celestia turned from the window and shook her head,
"Discord has escaped again girls... Try to keep him from, I don't know... Joining forces or something. Perhaps when I imprison chaotic demigods in stone I should stop putting them on display in the garden."
Twilight stared at the princess dumbfounded, she only now realized how dumb it was to place Discord in plain sight.
"Gee, do ya think princess? If you two stopped doing silly easily avoided things Equestria would actually have a moment's peace... Looks like I gotta go get AJ and Rarity and fight not one but TWO villains... I hope your good Lombax!"
"I do this stuff all the time! Now if you'll excuse me I need to take my Scorpion Flail off that poor ponies umm hoofs."
"Oh so it's your fault?! The nerve of you aliens..."
"Come on Twilight, lighten up! We got a planet to save!"
"Uggghhh! I can't wait till you go home!"
"Hey you! Orange furry guy?" Pinkie Pie burst through the door and ran up to Ratchet, a devilish smile dancing on her lips. "Can you sheep me? I wanna be a sheep, please?"
Ratchet raised an eyebrow at the request but thought, eh what the heck. He pulled out his Sheepinator and blasted Pinkie with a wide beam of energy. In mere seconds a bright pink sheep was standing in the ponies place. Her face lit up as she saw her fluffy fleece and funny shaped head.
"Oooh, Look I'm sheeple! Ok, lets get going guys!"
Celestia watched in quiet contemplation as the small group left her chambers.
"Do you think they suspect anything Shelly?" Said a masculine robotic voice, in Celestia's place stood a massive robot with a live nuclear device within his body.
"Dese ponies be stupid, we will crush dem all! Dey remind me of wee little sissy girls!" Replied another manly voice, this one a massive green behemoth with a cigar hanging from his mouth.
"So, should we join the good Doctor?"
"Nar, let me kill some ponies!"
"That's not really a plan..."
"Aww you spoil my fun Reactor! Fine, we squish dem and join with Ne...Nef...Nefer.. grr the Doctor! Ratchet will be crushed like a girly man!"
Ratchet and Clank: Nefarious Equine
Nefarious stood before a dragon, its wet breath misting the visor protecting his delicate brain circuits. Its golden eyes glared down at the insignificant machine before it. The doctor began to charge his newly created Biobliterator Gun, a bright orange light began to glow within the weapons barrel. He began to laugh maniacally as the beam of energy engulfed the dragon in its searing warmth. The dragon began to thrash violently and tried to release a torrent of fire. Slowly its snout began to solidify and form into a metallic shell. Within minutes the beast was completely robotic, bright red pinpricks of light replaced its amber eyes.
"Mwahaha! These foolish squishies will be unprepared for my Mechano-drake!"
"Affirmative master, I will engulf them in plasma and leave Ponyville in smoldering remains!"
"Fly my metallic creation, we make haste to their puny settlement!"
A shadow fell over Ponyville, everyone stared up to the clear sky and wondered what calamity would befall them this time. Rarity was knee deep in a new dress, the natural light giving life to the silken material. She sighed loudly as the sun was blotted out.
"I thought Rainbow Dash forecast a lovely sunny day, I guess she forgot yet again..."
She trotted over to the window and stared at a strangely draconic shadow flying high above the land.
"Oh I don't think we were scheduled a dragon attack today... This is the worst thing ever... My dressmaking is ruined!"
The shadow grew bigger as the dragon descended towards the earth. A thunderous roar echoed through the countryside as the metallic beast spread a wing to relinquish its master from his perch. Nefarious dropped to the earth and turned to his robotic dragon,
"Go on! Have some fun, lighten the place up! Mwahaha!"
"With pleasure!"
A large crowd of ponies formed around the new stranger, their curiosity taking over logic. The mayor stepped forward and demanded a name from the metal stranger.
"Who or what are you?"
"I am the great Dr Nefarious! Bow before me squishies, soon you will no longer be pathetic flesh bags!"
"Another villain? But the new season hasn't even started!"
"What?! I am not just ANOTHER villain! I am the GREATEST villain this galaxy has ever known!"
"Uh-huh..."
"Pah! I will show you.... MECHANO-DRAKE! BURN DOWN THEIR TINY SQUISHIE HOUSES!"
A massive ball of fire flew across the sky, its blazing trail heading straight for Carousel Boutique. It struck the building with shattering force, igniting the light flammable clothes inside. A loud scream broke out from within causing everypony to stare in fear. From the burning building ran Rarity, trailing a pile of dresses with small hooves underneath. Her face was whiter then usual, sweat pasted on her forehead. She watched in horror as her livelihood crackled and burned before her, in mere seconds the inferno had claimed its victim. Rarity whirled around to face Nefarious, her fury unimaginable,
"I WILL DESTROY YOU!" A burst of magic flew from her horn as she tried to throw him away. A shield protected him causing the spell to simply reflect into the empty air.
"Mwahaha! See how pathetic your squishie powers are? Robots are the glorious future!"
"Nefarious... How was your trip in space? Must have been so fun losing to a Lombax." Ratchet stepped forward and aimed his Plasma Coil directly at the robots head.
"No, not you again! Why must you be so annoying?! Grrr never mind, I have more important things to attend to. Enjoy my little pet!"
Dr nefarious teleported into thin air, leaving Ratchet with the bitter taste of his escape. The robotic dragon roared in fury as two massive cannons began to extend from its back.
"Oooh a boss battle, Time to extinguish his flame!"
*Insert epic boss theme here*
Youtube Video
Ratchet pulled out numerous weapons as rockets began to paint the streets of Ponyville. He lay several turrets upon the ground and fired a powerful shot from his fully charged Shock Cannon. The damage to his foe was barely noticeable as it breathed a huge cone of fire towards the lombax. Quickly he strafed to the left and began to pepper the dragon with his Dual Vipers. Everypony was crowded around the apparent arena the two now fought on, their eyes locked on the epic battle occurring before them.
"Alright Dragon-bot... Lets see how you fare against THIS!"
From his inventory came a large gun with a long tube, as he pulled the trigger a large rocket flew from the barrel and struck the dragon full in the face. The heavy impact caused pieces of its metal amour to fly off into the air, embedding themselves in the soft soil. Roaring loudly, the dragon flew up in the air and attempted to slam the ground where Ratchet stood. The earth shattered beside him as he once more jumped away and shot several more rockets into its unprotected mouth. The dragon roared in primal fury and entered his second battle mode, his wings extended outward as two large rockets fired from beneath. Each one struck the ground and released a large shock-wave towards the strafing lombax. He dodged them with ease and dropped a mini-nuke onto the beasts back. A small explosive cloud followed the initial blast, sending the metallic skull hurtling into the square.
The dragon fell to the ground defeated, a huge surge of power enveloped the lombax, shattering several windows and posts. Rarity ran forward and kissed him on the cheek, her face filled with awe.
"Woah, woah, woah! It was really nothing ma'am *Ahem* I do stuff like this all the time!"
"Well it seems your quite the hero ummm...?"
"Call me Ratchet, oh by the way this is Clank."
"Hello!"
"Oh how dapper! That suit looks fabulous!"
"Yes, in my home galaxy I am quite the celebrity."
"Is that so?" Rarity stared at the little silver robot and got a sudden flash of inspiration "Idea! Sweetie Belle? Did you save my scrapbook."
A muffled groan was heard through the clothes pile as the young filly searched for her sisters fabled scrapbook of designs. A tattered book landed at Rarity's fore-hoofs,
"Found it 'sis!"
"Oh thank heavens!"
Behind Ratchet was a large chariot, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were the noble mares pulling it for both the newcomer and the other ponies. Twilight ran forward and grabbed the unaware fashionista by the neck, dragging her towards the chariot. The citizens dispersed from the square, returning to their boring lives as the Elements headed towards Sweet Apple Acres.
Today was quite the apple harvest over at the orchard, Applejack had just finished in the southern field and had gone to take a nap. Her signature stetson covered her face as light snores arose from her sleeping form. A loud thump against the solid earth stirred the orange pony awake, she stared at the large chariot and saw her friends ready and waiting.
"Well howdy there Twilight, whats with the big ol' group gatherin'?"
"Oh you know, just an escaped god of chaos and an evil robot mastermind from beyond the stars."
"Isn't ol' discord, ya know reformed?"
"Well umm he is but I err gave him to much creative freedom.. I'm the worst god-sitter..."
"This is Discord we're talkin' bout Fluttershy... Not the most trustworthy guy in any world."
Applejack's eyes widened at the strange striped bat creature casually lounging in the chariot, the tiny metal golem beside him raising her eyebrows even higher.
"Who in tarnation is this here wingless bat?"
Ratchet looked somewhat offended, was he really that ugly to be confused with a bat? He shook his head and offered a gloved hand to the orange pony,
"Hi I'm Ratchet, pleased to meet you! Oh and I'm not a bat... I'm a Lombax and I come from another world."
"Well I'll be a donkeys uncle... Never thought I'd meet a gosh darn space alien. By the way my names Applejack. So what brings you round these parts?"
"Just an evil robot hell bent on turning the galaxy into his own personal mechanical empire."
"Sounds 'bout right... Can't ever let ya hair down, cause when ya do? Some other bad guy shows up ta ruin ya day..." Applejack tipped her stetson back and stared back at Twilight. "Take it ya need ma help sugarcube? Being element of honesty an all."
"Yes, I could really use the help."
Slowly the orange pony hopped up into the carriage and sat down next to Ratchet, who simply stared off into the distance as they lifted off the ground.
"Oh hi AJ! Guess what I'm a pink sheep now!"
"That's nice Pin- Wait, what?"
Once again Applejack raised an eyebrow as her eyes settled upon the Pinkie-sheep, then again she wasn't to surprised with her random, reality bending friend.
Lawrence had been enjoying his moment in the spotlight as large packs of Diamond Dogs dug for precious Raritanium, each one following his every command,
"No wonder he enjoys being a villain, pity my minions are all squishy... DIG DOGS, DIG!"
"Rover, why do we hav ta grind da gems? Lets make HIM do it!"
"Request denied, we follow the masters command for the glory of the robo-rover empire!"
"What? We all get metal stuff?"
"Affirmative!"
"Oooh skin so shiny... Dig faster, me want metal skin!"
Nefarious teleported into the cave in an electric blue cloud, causing several Diamond Dogs to scatter in shock. The Doctor felt all their beady eyes fall upon him as they saw their true master.
"Lawrence, how are our little minions coming along?"
"Back already? Well it was fun while it lasted... We have enough Raritanium to increase the power of the Biobliterator gun across several hectares."
"Yes! You dumb mutts have done well... Seems it is time for these squishies to have a metallic makeover, Mwahahaha!"
Nefarious began to charge the gun to its full potential, releasing its powerful energy in a surge of blue light. As the bright light faded the new and improved Diamond Dogs stared in wonder at their new forms. Salutes greeted the Doctor once the changes had taken full effect, their new master earning the trust of the packs.
"We take new name! We become the Chrome Hounds!" Murmurs of agreement drifted through the crowd, Rover bowed before his former underlings and howled in metallic fury.
"Alright, my mechanical minions your new task awaits you. I want the head of both Twilight Sparkle and a furry squishy thing called Ratchet! These pathetic hoofed squishies will bow to me!"
"And what do we do with other elements?"
"ANNIHILATE THEM! That is all. Now run along my dumb slaves, kill the weak little pony things!"
"Death to Ponies! Rend them, squish them, annihilate them." The large army began to dig through the earth, half headed towards Ponyville, the others to the walls of Canterlot.
Two large footfalls echoed through the now empty tunnels as holograms of the princesses wandered into the chamber Nefarious resided. The Doctor was once again yelling at Lawrence for sarcasm, when he was startled by the loud voice that sounded vaguely familiar.
"Hey if it ain't old Neffy, how's life been treating ya?" The heavily masculine voice sounded strange and out of place coming from the lithe form of a female equine.
"Who the hell are you? Squishies do not give me nicknames and live to talk about it!"
"Oh right, the ponified Holo-guise..." A small whoosh sounded as the holograms faded away, revealing two very tall robots that were twice the build of Nefarious.
The large green one chewed the end of a cigar as he stared down at the skinny robot before him. "Still a nerdy lil girly man I see, At least now ya not a stinky squishie!"
Nefarious stared up at the massive robot in disbelief, "Shellshock? I thought Ratchet gave you a new coat of bullets after your failed the Dreadzone battle? And how did you make it to this stupid squishy planet?"
"Reactor can say all da techno bull-"
"Shell, don't strain your processor man, that last batch of coffee was disgusting after that stuff with your accountant."
"He used numbas on me, so I blew his super CPU to tiny little shardy things!"
Reactor drew a large glowing object from his chest and lay it upon the stone. Nefarious stared at it with vivid interest and stepped forward to pick it up.
"Think of it as a joining fee, Shellshock and I wish to join your forces to destroy that damn lombax that stole my title and ruined my relationship with Courtney Gears! Oh and to squish his *wee little furry brain* as Shellshock puts it."
"A Taboran Crystal is just what I need, consider yourselves a part of my army! But I will annihilate you if you call me Neffy again!"
"Heh, seems little nerdy girl doesn't like da old name we gave her!"
Shellshock began to laugh until he saw the large gun pointed at his chest, he glared at the Doctor and began to insult him.
"If I can turn squishy to robot, I can reverse it! What will it be, insults or annihilation?"
The large green robot stepped back and apologized to the mad doctor, who now gloated over beating one of his former tormentors.
"Now that we've been re-united you will use your Pony-guise to change the rule over to me, and destroy any squishy who tries to fight."
"What if the princesses come back? We sort of just took their place..."
"What my minions always do, ANNIHILATE!"
Over at the Crystal Kingdom the two princesses had begun preparations for the trip back to Canterlot. Princess Luna could not wait to return and watch the new season of Game of Roans. The boring nightlife had made her holiday feel like a year, even the dreams she wandered through were boring. She wanted nothing more to sit at home and eat a bowl of popcorn while watching her favorite shows. Celestia on the other hand had enjoyed the northern hospitality and regretted having to leave to attend the droll Gala they held every year.
"So sister how do thou think the kingdom is?"
"Knowing those six? Probably some new disaster... As long as Sparkle stays level-headed it should be fine. What's the worst that could happen?"
"Thou have done it once again!"
"What do you mean?"
"Jinx it by uttering those accursed words!"
"Oh right... It's fine!"
"Why?! Is fate my cruel tormentor? We must return immediately!"
"Relax, I'm sure whatever it is will blow over!"
"CEEELLLEEESSSTTTIIIAA!"
The whole kingdom was awoken by the loud shout that continued to echo around the mountains. Everypony began to run for cover, remembering the last time the sisters fought. A whole kingdom fell beneath the waves when Celestia had stolen her sisters hair brush. Never again did anypony mess with a sisters belongings. Even Cadence could do nothing to quench that fury. Luckily this time was a false alarm, making several thousand ponies sigh in collective relief.
"We have a bad feeling..."
"I gotta feeli-" Celestia stopped her song as Luna's eyes bored deeply into her soul, she smiled sheepishly and trotted out of the palace to search for their aerial chauffeurs.
Luna sighed deeply as her sister left the room, her excitement building at the thought of action and battle once more. She stared up at the moon and pondered on what disaster Twilight and her friends were a part of this time.