Chapters The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 1 : Your Hero for Excellence.
" Come on Gus! You're getting behind! " Seymour called me from some dozen meters away.
I ran to Seymour.
" Seymour... take the googles out... " I ordered him, panting.
" What? Do you want to finish already? If we were just started! " He protested.
Damn it! He could be so genially idiot sometimes! So, I took out his googles as well.
" Hey dude, why did you...? Ahhhhhh! " Seymour screamed and stuck to me with a hug like a fat toad, when he realized the
" That's what I gonna ask you, Dr. Cooper! " I don't know why The Big Bang Theory show came to my mind. " What did you
" No! How can you think that?! "
" Then how do you explain this?!! " I opened the arms and turned around.
" Man, I don't know, I don't know!! "
" Ok, ok. " I relaxed a bit. " Get us back to your house. Now. " I emphasized with the index finger.
" But how?! I don't know what happened! It could be the hardware acceleration chip...? Or the VR expansion set...?
" I don't care what was. Get us back, now. " I threateningly pointed my finger to him.
" I've already told you, I don't know how to get us back! "
" No? Aren't you the bloody genius? Then figure it out, Einstein! " I pushed him a bit too hard.
" Hello? Is somepony there? " A female voice interrupted our argument.
Seymour stuck like a toad to me again.
" Ahh! Dude, what's that?! "
" That's Zecora, you damned chicken! " I recognized the voice, while struggling to get out from his embrace again.
" Zecora? But I don't like Zecora... "
" Come on, hide! "
" Why? If it's just Zecora... "
" This's the adult version, you idiot! She might be hostile! " I whispered below my breath.
" Ah, rig... "
I didn't let him finish the sentence, as practically threw him into a nearby bushes. Then, I looked back, to make sure
" Damn it, Seymour! Move out! "
" Ehhh... dude. We have a problem here. "
" What kind of problem? " I crawled to his side, and happened to see a field of blue flowers.
" That're Joke Flowers! If we touch it, we'll be screwed! " Seymour rued.
" Damn it! "
" Now what we're gonna do? "
I thought for a while, and then it came to me:
" Scare her. " I sat on the ground, put the googles on and started to look in the available options.
" How? "
" Let me see... Alien vs Predator 7. This will do. "
" Alien vs Predator? I want to be Predator! I want to be Predator! " Seymour bumped of joyful anxiety.
" Suit yourself. " I replied, annoyed, while activating the character change.
" Hello? Is there somepony there. He...? " Zecora finally reached the spot we were hiding, and suddenly... A drooling
" Whooooorrggggg!!! " They both roared.
" Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! " Zecora screamed, jumping in place and bristling, and running away at all the speed she could.
But the two monsters were still pursuin her! The three of them randomly running among the woods, like there were many
After a long run, tired, the alien reached a clear in the forest.
" Harg harg harg harg. " He laughed with a growling laughter. " That was so fun. So pity I've lost such a tasty prey... "
Then the alien startled, shook his head, and deactivated the character change, so I returned to my old self, still
" What the...? Was I turning into... that thing...? " I opened my eyes, frightened: Seymour! I have to tell him to
I rushed back to find Seymour's track, but I soon returned from my steps, and later again...
" Damn! I got lost! "
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The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 2 : The good, the bad and the worst.
Zecora managed to get to her house and locked inside. Then she looked for the window and gasped, scared, as a blurry
Then, suddenly, the door got a thud, and then other, and other.
" Mwahahahahaha! " An evil laugh could be heared from the other side.
" Oh nooo... " Zecora almost passes out.
POM! The door almost cracks open with the last thud.
" Ahhh! " Zecora yells. " Somepony, please heeeeeelp... " She cries, desperate, and covering completely with her
After a while that looks like years to her, the noises stopped. She still spend some more time hidden under the table,
Zecora gulped:
" Could that monster have gone and let poor Zecora alone?
She then risked to half"open the door. Well, it looks like the danger is go...
Suddenly, a claw enters for the open door, impeding it to close!
" Mwahahahahahahahaha! "
" AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! " Zecora's scream was so high and loud, that it made a bird flock to take off.
I could hear it and, seeing from where the birds go flying, spotted where it came from. So I rushed in the right
When I arrived, Predator Seymour already had entered Zecora's house, and had her cornered.
" Mwahahahahaha! I wonder how zebras taste... "
" Ahhhhhhhhhhh! "
" Mwahahahaha....! " He couldn't continue laughing as I shot him and took him down.
Then, I asked Zecora:
" Are you allright, girl?! "
She ran to me and jumped to hugging me.
" Thank you, thank you, whatever you are
I took her out from her house and put her somewhere near:
" I have to capture the monster now. Wait here until I finish, Ok? "
" Watch out! " She raised a hoof, scared.
I almost haven't time to turn and I've already had the predator over me. However, I managed to grab his arm and, using
" Damn it! He was stronger than I thought! " I cursed.
Then, when I was going to reload the gun:
" Oh, crap... "
All my left arm was bleeding. I knelt, stunned. My sight was leaving and coming. I've never had an injury this bad.
" Oh no! My savior is badly wounded!
She practically dragged me to her house, as I was unable to even think.
After a while of applying healing potions and bandages, my blood pressure finally stabilized and the wound cicatrized,
" Do you feel better, my savior?
" No. It doesn't. " I threw a pious lie. Then, how I didn't really want anything between Zecora and me, I added:
" How can you say that, my hero?
I made an annoyed gesture, realizing that it was pointless to argue about it. Then, I moved and twisted the arm,
" Whoa! Great job you did with this! " I cheered her.
" Thank you, but it was nothing compared with you, who are so awesome
I raised a brow: I didn't like were this was going:
" All right, all right. Look, let me take care of the monster. Wait for me here, Ok? "
She happily nodded, and I get out from the house, closed the door and walked to my unconscious pred"I mean friend.
" Well. How I'm supposed to turn him back to his old self? " I tried to reach his VR googles, but I couldn't find it
Then my lightbulb turned on. I put my own VR googles on him and pressed: "Remove character". Inmediately, Predator
" Seymour, dude. Are you all right? "
" Eh... Gus? Where... where I am? What happened? "
" You almost ate Zecora. Don't you remember? "
" Me? Damn! " Then, he stood up, stumbling. " This was your idea, remember?! " He pointed to me, very angry.
" Yeah, and you almost killed me. " I showed him my bandaged arm.
" Oh? Oh, man, I did it again. I'm sorry, dude, I'm sorry, I'm sorry... " He stuck to me like a toad again, crying like
" Don't worry man, don't worry. No hard feelings. " I cheered him with some pats in the back.
" You're the best, man. You're the best. "
" Ok, ok, now let go. " I broke the unconfortable toad"hug. " Look, Zecora can't figure out that you were the predator,
" Yes, dude, whatever you say. " He agreed and turned to hide, drying the tears and swelling the muccus.
I returned to Zecora's house and knocked the door:
" Zecora, open up, it's me, the hero. "
She opened the door and also jumped to hugging me:
" Oh, my hero, I am so happy that you have come back,
Well, that doesn't sounds too bad...
After we had the dinner and talked, knowing each other, I told her:
" Hey, Zecora, I need to get out for a while, so... "
" No! " Zecora interrupted me, raising her forelegs to me.
I looked at her, annoyed:
" Zecora, I DO REALLY need to get out! "
Zecora didn't answered inmediately. She just sat in her haunches, put her forelegs in front of her, like praying, and
" Please... do not... " She barely mumbled, eyes quivering and dropping ears.
The scene was heartbreaking, so I decided to do something about it:
" Look, Zecora. I've already taken care of all the monsters, and, from now on, if you want to stay safe, keep your
By judging Zecora's facial expression, she didn't like too much the idea, but, surprisingly, what did she told me was:
" All right, my hero, do what you must to make it better,
I got out from Zecora's house and got ready my arsenal: A lifeform detector, a sniper rifle and two submachine guns,
" Heh, 'One or another'. " I smirked. " This is gonna be an one-man massacre! "
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 3 : Forward to the past:
I wasn't lying when I spoke about the massacre. I should have cleaned half of the forest dangerous fauna: Spiders,
I did the rampage for two reasons:
First: I wanted to get Seymour safe so he could get us out, and Second and more important: I was in the mood for a
When I finished, I became worried for the high number of dead bodies:
" Damn! Zecora will get pissed off if she find this out! " So, I cast a levitator gun from the game Portal and took all
" Well, that'll do. " I greeted myself, satisfied.
Then I stepped back to Seymour:
" I bet you had your fun, do you? " He shrunk an eye.
" Hell I had! This was like Far Cry Primal, but 1000 percent better! " I opened my arms in the edge of joy.
" Come on, Gus! You're already near the forties! Behave yourself. "
" Ohhh... Don't tell me now that you're concerned for those poor critters. " I mocked him.
" Is not that. Is that your... killer instincs, are kinda freaking me out. "
" Chicken. Well, tell me some good news. "
" The news? Well, there's a good one and a bad one. "
I really didn't want to hear the bad. Let's pospose it, do we?
" Which is the good one? "
" I figured out how to come back... "
" Wow! That's the best of news! Come on, it's almost nightfall and I wanna bath! " I cheered happily.
" Not so quick, buster. " He stopped me with an opened hand " You're not going to like what you're gonna see. "
" Bah. What could have happened? The Third World War started while we were out? Come on! " I took out importance to the
It turns he wasn't exagerating.
We appeared inside what'll be his room, just it doesn't look like his room. No VR rack, no TV, no fancy computers and
" Seymour, dude...what... what happened? "
" It's not what happened. " He answered with a despaired tone. " It's what's not. "
He extended a newspaper to me, and I took it. My eyes opened wide:
" Thursday, 9th December 2010?! We traveled back in time?!! But how?!! "
" Remember that I told you that I've done some improvements to the VR systems? "
" Yeahhh... " I started sweating, as I was imagining what was coming next.
" I used this new prototype chip, that subatomic based one... "
" What...?! That one, which breaks the rules of time and space...?! "
" The very same... "
" Holy shit! And now how we get back to our time?! "
" Hell I know! My VR system is now in 2020, and the chip's technology will not be invented until 2017. "
" In a few words, we're stuck here, 10 years earlier. And I suppose there are two of us... "
" Yep. Luckily, I didn't moved here until 2012, so we have plenty of time. "
" Wow! That's so reassuring! " I launched my sarcarsm of the night.
" But look on the good side! We now know what's gonna happen in the next 10 years! We could become some kind of gurus,
" No way, Seymour! Don't you remember what happened in Back to the Future? And we haven't a DeLorean! So, if we screw
" Oh... Then... What do you propose...? "
" Let's get back to Equestria. "
" Huh? "
" As you said, we already know what's gonna happen. We can become famous there, without the risk of messing with our own
" Ow! You know, Gus? Sometimes I wonder if we're not relatives. "
" Yes, sure. Your mom slept with my dad. "
" Yeah... What?! "
" Never mind. Come on. Let's get some rest here, in the civilization. We'll get back to Equestria tomorrow. "
Zecora woke up well early in the morning. The first thing she does was to call her hero's name. She started to look
Finally, she returned to her home and laid to the floor, crying. Why this always happens to her? Everytime she thinks
Maybe it was time to give up?
Nopony was going to miss her, anyway.
" Zecora, why are you crying? "
Zecora stared at me, and her face looked like she has seen the light in the darkness. She trotted to me with a wide
" Gus, Gus, You have came back to my hooves,
" Hey, cut that out, will you? We aren't married or anything! Do we? " I replied. Then, I pointed to Seymour.
" Oh, nice to meet you, Mr. Not Equine,
" Hey. " Seymour answered with a careless gesture.
" Oh! It looks like I have to prepare a larger lunch today,
" Why don't you go to Ponyville to get some? " I suggested.
" Ponyville? But, the ponies don't talk to me at all,
" Come on, I think you can give it a try, isn't? "
Zecora put a forehoof on her chin:
" Yes, I think so... "
After Zecora had picked her raincoat and left, Seymour and I sat into her house.
" Why the long face, buddy? " I tried to cheer my friend after a long boring silence.
" Damn it, dude. You barely have passed a day here and you've already a mare in love with you. "
" What's so? Jealous? " I laughed.
" No... Yes... "
I laughed even louder.
" I toght... ha ha ha ha... I thought you don't liked Zecora. " I could barely speak as I had almost no air in my
" I didn't! You know that my crush is for Pinkie Pie. By the way, why we didn't go with Zecora to Ponyville? We missed
" Nope. We didn't. If we go now to Ponyville we'll be spotted by the Princesses, and next thing that will happen is that
" Oh, right. They'll banish us for sure. "
" Yep. So, by now, we'll better keep ourselves low profile... " I pointed down.
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 5 : Gimme a break, will you?:
Twilight woke up, among her friends, all of them lying in the ground, uncounscious, at the border of the Everfree.
" What... what just happened?! " She asked, putting a forehoof in her face, still dizzy, and then got frightened when
The other mares started to wake up too.
" Owww, mah head. Ah feel like ah been bucked a hundred times. " Applejack complained.
" Look, two Twilights. " Rainbow Dash smiled, like drunk, raising a forehoof to her friend.
" Angel... don't be so mean, Angel. " Keep saying Fluttershy between snorings, still asleep.
Twilight looked right, then left: Where...?! Where is Pinkie Pie...?!!!
" Girls, girls! Pinkie Pie is missing! " Twilight screamed, terrified.
" Huh... what?! " Rarity awakened.
" It looks like something knocked us down, and ponynapped Pinkie Pie! "
" But why only ponynap Pinkie Pie, having better and prettier ponies to ponynap, like myself? " Rarity objected,
" Rarity! " The others mares said in unison.
" There's no time to waste, we have to save her! " Commanded Twilight. " Follow me! " They entered the Everfree...
I, suited like Iron Man, was flying using my lifeform scanner. As I had recently cleared the woods from the larger
" There she is! " I communicated to the other stupid and fat Iron Man that was following me. " Intercept her! "
Iron Man Seymour landed just before Pinkie Pie, who with a high"pitched shriek, turned to the right, trying to escape.
" Stupid! " I scolded him with my robotic"like voice. " I almost had her! Go, go, go! " I threw him away and resumed the
Twilight and the other mares could hear Pinkie's screams:
" She's in danger! Come on, this way! "
Finally, we surrounded the runaway mare for both sides, and captured her at the same time.
" Gotcha! "
" Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! " Pinkie screamed, trying uselessly to escape.
" Release our friend at once! " Ordered Twilight, defiantly.
" Yes, release her, before I buck your lights out! " Threatened RD, performing like a boxer.
Shit...
I'll get Seymour killed for this. Seriously...
In front of us, there were the other mares of the Mane 6. Seymour and me looked each other, while both holding the tail
" Now what do we do, boss? " Asked Seymour in a whisper.
" Follow my acting. " I whispered back. Then, I put a fist in my chest and talked aloud, with the robotic voice, of
" Yeah, exactly what he says! " Seymour backed me up, also with robotic voice and launching a fire blast too.
" Don't worry about me! Save yourselves, save yourselves! " Screamed Pinkie Pie.
Our power demostration surely had scared Applejack, Fluttershy and Rarity, but Twilight and RD stayed firm.
" We're not going without our friend! " They replied.
Twilight started to scratch the ground with her hoof, getting ready to attack.
Alright, that didn't work. Let's try Plan B.
Sincerely, I just wanna to take out the armor and say: " "Hey, girls, sorry, this is a huge misunderstanding..." " and
" We, the Metal Monsters, do appreciate the loyalty between warriors. So, if one of you are willing to stand for this
At this point, I was hoping that Seymour were saying something like " "Dude, what're you doing?" " But nothing about
The mares stared at each other. Then Twilight steps forward.
" Twilight, ya won't be thinkin'... " Applejack looked her with a scrambled mouth.
" Sorry, AJ, but it was I who get all of you in this mess, and is my duty to get you all out, even if it's the last
" Twilight... " Rarity sobbed.
" I accept your challenge! " Twilight exclaimed with unbreakable resolution.
Hmmmm. Her duty. That gives me an idea. But that'll requires me to win. Damn it. I'm not a saint.
I released Pinkie Pie's tail, and Seymour did it too. Damn! Will he could be actually a robot, disguised as a person?
" Metal Monster Mark One accepts your challenge! Speak your name, so I can add you to my trophy list! " I told her,
" I'm Twlight Sparkle! "
I took a fancy combat stance, one that I'll never do in an actual combat.
" Come on, Twilight! Show that abusive Metal Monster of what you're made of! " Exclaimed RD. " Twilight! Twilight! "
" Twilight! Twilight! Twilight! " The other mares soon joined the cheering.
Twilight looked at her friends, smiling, and her beautiful purple eyes got filled with tears. Then she turned quickly
It tooks all my willpower to not to ran away and quit this shameful fake at once.
Oh Lord! Why I have to do this? I'm gonna kill Seymour. For real. I'm gonna kill him.
" Indeed, Twlight Sparkle, prepare to die! "
Of course I didn't mean it. I just wanna leave her unconscious, just... let's say... not from the first strike.
She attacked first, launching a purple beam from her horn, which I easily avoided with a combination of shielding and
I could see the image in slow motion: The battered body of Pinkie Pie, giving her last aerial trip. I closed the eyes:
What happened later didn't make much sense to me. It was so damned fast, that I hadn't time to understand what had
I looked forward again, and I could see all the mares with her muzzles opened, not believing what has just happened.
I couldn't have a better chance than this one! So I put my arm on my chest and made a light reverence:
" What we Metal Monsters have witnessed today, are equal to the great deeds of our ancestors. Honor, determination and
And saying this, I turned to Seymour and made a gesture of "Let's go" to him, and we both fled away...
After we left, Twilight turned her head to Pinkie, who was still laid, motionless, and with the eyes closed.
" Pinkie...? Pinkie...? " She called and gently shook her, and as she got no response, her eyes filled with tears:
The other mares came closer, shocked.
" Pinkieeeee!!! " Twilight finally yelled, about to cry.
" Gotcha! Ha ha ha ha ha! " Happily bumped Pinkie Pie.
" Pinkie! " The other mares say at unison.
" In the name of Celestia's mane, Pinkie Pieeeeeeee!!! " Twilight angrily exclaimed, while the party mare were rolling
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The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 6 : Friendly First Contact Second Chance:
" Sorry, dude. I pretty shitted everything out. I'm sorry. " Seymour was trying to earn my pardon, while I was
" Seymour... we... we're done. I... I don't want to see you again. Ever. "
" But dude! That was an unintentional mistake! I didn't mean it, truly! You've to believe me! "
" This is over, Seymour. I... I'm going to return to the Earth, and hide at the Himalayas or something, lifetime. I
" Then, this is it?! All our plans of greatness, ending just by a tiny mistake, huh?! " He still complained. " It's not
I didn't answer back nor returned, as that will mean to continue a pointless argument. I've already taken my decision.
No way.
I looked back, and Seymour has dissapeared. Who cares! He'll surely go to Ponyville, will make one of his "tiny
I found a little soil mound, and sat in. I kept watching for a long while, for the last time, the place that one day
As I was standing up and gathering strenght for my goodbye, I saw Zecora galloping very fast to me with a scared look
" Gus, Gus, my savior, protect me please!!,
" Zecora, what's happening? " I asked, worried.
" I saw it, I saw it! Another monster like the one that attacked me!
Dammit, Seymour!
Fluttershy were having a peaceful evening picnic with her animal friends, including Harry the Bear, when the
" Angel, dear. What's happening? Why are you all scared? " Fluttershy asked, concerned.
Harry the Bear sniffed out, stood up and turned to a strange bipedal creature, covered with a large raincoat.
" Grrrr... " Harry growled, showing his fangs.
" Harry, w"what... what's t"that t"thing? Have y"you seen it"t b"b"before? " Fluttershy stuttered, almost panicking and
A pair of yellow eyes glowed on the upmost part of the raincoat, and the next second, Harry had received a demolishing
" Ahhhhhhhhh!! " Screamed Fluttershy, terrified, while the fearsome beast grabbed her for the tail and lifted her about
" Mwahahahahahahahaaaaa...!! " The evil laugh echoed in the darkness, as she passed out.
I quickly ran to the EDS and made a scanning: Predator Seymour was nowhere to be found. Then, I heared the scream. It's
" Zecora, go to Ponyville and warn the others, Fluttershy is in danger! "
" Yes, yes, I'll go right away!,
I'll rather not get them involved into this, but Pinkie Pie's sixth sense surely had already warned them, so it was
Then, I used my tracker spell to find where was Seymour hiding... Well, he's not hiding. He's in the middle of a clear
And it was no trouble at all to find him, as he was roaring all the time:
" WAAAAAAARGGGG!!! IF YOU WANT YOUR FRIEND COME TO MEEEEEEEEE!!! WAAAAARRRRGGG!!! "
When I arrived to the forest's clear, the rest of the Mane 6 where arriving too. Zecora were talking to them, probably
Quick as a lightning, I summonned a magic field and a phase shield at the same time, protecting the mares from the
Damn!
I made the two shield protection to me too and ran among the trees, which were being pulverized by the constant
" What's happening?! What kind of magic is that?! " She asked, scared.
" It's not magic, it's a damned weapon! " I explained in a rush. Then, I cast a thermal grenade. " Twilight,
She do so.
" Woooorrrggggg! " Seymour roared, but his roars stopped when he saw the grenade rolling between his feet.
BOOM! The expansion wave throw him to the air. I took the chance, released the shielding and cast a rapid fire blaster
" Applejack, tie him! "
Once tied enough:
" Rarity, Twilight, hold his fingers, don't let him fire!, Rainbow, buck his head, stun him! " I instructed all of them,
Finally, with our teamwork, he was almost reducted, which allowed me to hold his own guns and shoot him with them.
The blast send him far away back, time I took to cast an overpowered stun grenade and launched it to him. Then I ran
" Now what?! " Asked RD.
" Take cover! " I ordered, taking them to a natural trench nearby.
After the explosion, my ears started to buzz with a static"like noise. I could imagine that the mares, with a more
A second later, Seymour was transported to the Earth without any working VR tool. He won't be able to come back...
I laid myself backside on the ground, tired to death, and closed the eyes.
Then I felt a movement of wings, and something hard tapping my face:
" Hey, monkey thing! Are you dead? " I could hear a familiar voice.
I slowly opened the eyes, and could see the angelical form of Rainb... Ugh! She kicked me in the...! Ok, I deserved
" Wow, monkey thing... that was... awesome! " She amazed. " How can you cast all those spells and fight so well at the
" Yep, I can do it fine when nopony is hitting me in my private parts. " I replied with a carrasped voice, grabbing my
" Oh, sorry. " She giggled. " I'm still a bit dizzy, and my ears are buzzing. That's not permanent, is it? "
I looked at her, wrinkling an eye, really desiring to say yes.
Soon, the other mares found Fluttershy, tied and scared but safe and sound, and all of then came to me:
" Are you alright? You're not hurt? " Asked Twilight.
" Just my pride. "
" Thank you, Mr. monkey... Goos? That's your name? "
" Gus... "
" Well, Gus. You saved us all, and I'm very grateful for that, but there's still some things that not match. Could you
" Well... " I felt a bit embarrassed, and rubbed the back of my head, trying the nicest of my smiles, but by judging
Surprisingly, against what I've feared, the mares took my antics quite well, as they perceived that my intentions
" Yes, sure! " I happily agreed. " And the first pony I'm going to visit is you! " I pointed Twilight.
" Me? Why me? "
" Because I like youuuu! " I smiled, petting her cheek, with a condescending tone.
" Don't do that... you're embarrasing me... " She looked to both sides, blushing.
We all laughed.
Well, it seems that I'm not leaving, after all...
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
And there I was, laughing and enjoying with my newfound friends, when, a warning spark crossed my mind:
I had sent Seymour to the past, where there is still a younger version of me! He could go and release his vengeful fury
" Well, sorry, girls, but I have to go to do something important! See ya! " I stood quickly and teletransported to the
When I arrived to Seymour's room. ( Technically it still wasn't his. ) He had already departed. Damn! I exited the
I cast the Lightfeet an Muscle Toner spells, and all the pedestrians and drivers on my way got surprised and scared
Seymour arrived to my home and ringed the bell. I opened the door, wearing a cap and a casual outfit. " Hello, buddy!
" No, not at all. "
" Come on! I challenge you to another match of 007 Goldeneye! You're not gonna win a single one this time! " I told him
As soon as Seymour entered the house and I closed the door, I cast a sleeping spell on him.
" Now, what do I do with you? " I rubbed the back of my head.
I thought for a while, but I came out with no worthy plan.
Wait. If the VR googles only displaces between dimensions, if I go to Equestria I'll appear on the Everfree, then, from
I grabbed sleeping Seymour, activated the VR and... we appeared on the very center of Canterlot Castle, almost face to
I pushed my VR googles again, and it was dead. I opened my eyes wide, scared:
" Oh, crap... "
It was nightfall, and Twilight was arriving to her library house. She better have a good sleeping night, as the next
" Twilight, Twilight! You have an urgent message from Princess Luna! You have to go to Canterlot at once! "
" What?! What's happening?! " Riposted Twilight, as a carriage landed near her.
" A monkey thing appeared at Canterlot Castle, and tried to kill Cadance! "
" What?! A monkey thing you said?!! "
I, riding a surfing board"shaped cloud, was being aerial pursued by a platoon of pegasi, which were attacking me by
I had to leave Seymour behind. He was uncounscious, anyway. And ponies are nice, they're not going to kill him or
A rain of lightnings started to fell before me. I was able to avoid most of them, but some hit me flat, hurting like
" Damn! What a moment to this VR shit to die! " I cursed. " I should had took Seymour's one instead of crushing it!
At that moment, another lightning stroke me. That was it. I'm gonna leave those damned ponies like plucked chicken. I
Twilight arrives at Canterlot Castle, and Luna and Cadance were waiting for her.
" Cadance, Cadance! Are you alright?! Aren't you hurt?! " Twilight ran to her and they both hugged.
" I'm fine, I'm fine, Twilight. Look. Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake, clap your hooves and do a little shake. Ha
" What?! There were two of them? " Asked Twilight, surprised.
At that moment, a guard arrived galloping:
" Your Highness, the prisoner has awaken! "
" Good, bring him here for interrogation! " Ordered Luna.
A chained and magic dampened Seymour was taken to the Princesses' presence.
" Prisoner, what are you, and why did you entered the royal palace without permission?!! Answer at once!! " Luna almost
Seymour raised his head, picturing a maniacal smile:
" We are... pony eaters...! "
A general horrified gasp could be heard in the hall.
" And we come here to conquer your pathetic kingdom. Yes... Because we like roasted ponies, just from the oven,
The panic had taken over most ponies, and Princess Cadance was hyperventilating, eyes quivering on fear, with a hoof
" Yes. " Seymour continued scaring them. " He'll wait to night to come, and will enter your houses to steal your foals,
" Silence! That's enough! " Screamed Luna. " Tell us were he's hiding! Now!! "
" Why don't you ask to your little traitor over there? " Seymour pointed Twilight. " She was plotting with him to
" Shut up, jerk! You was the one trying to kill us all! " Twilight angrily protested.
" Prisoner! No more lies! Tell us the truth! " Ordered Luna again.
" It's the truth! " Seymour replied, smirking. " Why you don't scan my dreams, so you can see it by yourself? "
Luna got a bit surprised. She hesitated for a while, but finally she cast a sleeping spell on Seymour, closed her eyes
" Captain, arrest her! " She pointed a hoof to the lavender unicorn.
Now it was Twilight who was about to faint.
Another general scared gasp was heared.
" Your highness, wait! This must be some kind of trick! You can't believe what that creature...! " Shining Armor shouted
" Silence, Captain! The dreams don't lie! And what I've seen is beyond all forgiveness! Carry on my order, at once! "
" Yes... your highness... " Shining Armor reluctantly agreed, and turned to Twilight. " I'm sorry Twi. Guards, take her
" No! Big brother! Princess Luna! He's lying! No! " Pleaded Twilight as the guards dragged her away.
" I... can't... take it... anymore... " Said Cadance meekly and fainted, but Shining Armor hold her before she hits the
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Everything that I was seeing was reddish, my peripheral vision had gone, my teeth clenched, the adrenaline was running
Wait, I can't do that... What if I accidentally kill one of them...? Damn...
The huge sphere exploded like a balloon, expelling an air gust that launched them far away, allowing me to escape
Good, now, I can turn back to Canterlot without being seen, and "rescue" Seymour. They'll would had taken him to the
Celestia arrives in her carriage a little later, and gallops to the other princesses:
" Luna, what were you thinking?! " She runs to her sister and hits her head with a hoof. " How dare you to arrest
" But sister, we... a monkey thing tried to kill Cadance, and we searched it's dreams and we could see... " Luna tried
" I don't care what have you seen on somepony else's mind, Luna! You have no right to punish Twilight without my
" Yes, sister... " Luna drooped her head, ears and wings, scared.
Then, Celestia turned to Shining Armor:
" Captain, release Twilight inmediately! "
" Yes, your Highness! " He happily nodded and galloped to the dungeon.
After that, Celestia turned to Luna again:
" We'll talk about this later... "
Luna gulped and trembled.
Twilight, with a magic dampening ring on her horn, were sobbing and walking in circles on her prison cell:
" This... (sniff) this can't be happening... (sniff) This is a nightmare... I'm going... I'm going to sleep, and when I
She laid in the litter and sunk her face in the pillow, crying.
" It's all my fault! It's all my fault...! It's all my fauuuuuult!! "
" Twilight... why are you imprisoned? " I asked, surprised.
She slowly raised her head, looked sadly at me, and put it again under the pillow, without answering at all.
Then, I used my magic to open the cell's lock, entered and closed the door, as I could open it later. Then, I come
" Twilight? Come on, let's get out from here, come on. " I told her while taking out the magic dampening ring from her
" What's... what's the poooooint"t"t"t"t...? (sniff) Princess Celestia will never forgive meeeee... (sniff) She'll
" That's not gonna happen, Twi. I can assure you that. "
She raised her head:
" How... how can be you so sure? How...? "
I looked her straight to her eyes.
" Because... I love you, Twilight Sparkle. "
Her eyes widened, started to quiver, and a spark shined on them. Her coat, mane and tail bristled, like my skin as
" They're coming! Quickly, take us outa here! " I warned Twilight.
She nodded and illuminated her horn.
Seymour's "rescue" will have to wait...
Shining Armor galloped back to the expectant princesses, but alone.
" Captain, where's Twilight? " Asked Celestia, surprised.
" She's... she's gone, your highness! " The white unicorn answered, concerned.
" She's gone? What do you mean with "she's gone"?! " Celestia frightened.
" She isn't there, in the cell! "
Celestia closed her eyes and lightened her horn:
" Thanks to heavens, I can sense her...! " She sighed of relief, but then opened her eyes, concerned. " But I can't
" No, sister, no! We didn't do anything else behind your loin! We just sent her to jail and that's all, We swear!
" You don't fool me, Princess Luna! I know that you were jealous of my little sister, because you think that Princess
" Captain, that's enough! " Celestia stopped him. " It's too soon to drop to conclusions yet! She might have escaped!
" Yes, your highness! " Shining Armor acknowledged, gave a last furious stare to Luna and left.
Then, Celestia stared at Luna too.
" Luna, where something had happened to Twilight, I... I... " She shook her head, closing her eyes a little bit.
Luna, still laid in the floor, lowered the head and ears, and closed the eyes, trembling like a scared kitty.
It was daytime already, an Fluttershy was giving a walk with her animal friends, and happened to pass near the place
" Oh, Harry... I miss you... "
Suddenly, the animals startled out, and ran away.
" Hey, little ones. Why are you ru...? "
Her eyes opened widely, as she could see a huge shadow approaching her from the left, her body froze and started to
" Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!! "
" Flutters! Flutters! It's me, Twilight! Don't get scared! Calm down, calm down! "
Twilight trotted to her and hugged her before she fainted again.
" That's Gus, that's Gus, It's not the other damned murder! Calm down, Flutters. Calm down. "
" Twilight! I... I thought you were in Canterlot. " Panted Fluttershy, recovering from the jolt.
" Yes... I was... " Twilight broke the hug and looked sadly to her friend. " I just came to say goodbye. "
" What? Goodbye? Why? " Fluttershy couldn't understand.
Twilight didn't answer, she only looked at her with sad eyes.
Rarity was repairing her boutique, raising a shelf.
" I have to be very careful, this requires a lot of concentrat... "
Suddenly, the door slams open, and Spike enters the place, startling Rarity and making her to lose the magical grip on
" Spike! " She yelled, furious.
" Rarity, Rarity! Where's Twilight, where's Twilight?! I have to deliver this message to her! It's urgent! " He ran to
" But Spike, Twilight is in Canterlot! "
" No, she isn't! Look! " He forwarded the scroll to the fashion unicorn.
" But what's this?! " She surprised when she read it. " Spike, quick, go to Sweet Apple Acres and get Applejack, I'll go
" Rarity, wait! What's happening?! Why Celestia has to pardon Twilight?! What did she dooooooo?! " Rambled Spike running
The four mares arrive at Fluttershy's cottage, finding the pegasi sitting in her haunches, motionless, with her muzzle
" Flutters...? Flutters...? " Asked Applejack. " What's happenin' to ya, pardner? " She pass a hoof in front of her
" Ah! " She finally reacted. " Applejack? Girls? " She looked around, confused.
" Flutters, what happened? " Asked Rarity.
" Twilight... was here... "
" What?! Twilight?! "
" Yes. She and that... monkey thing... she came... she came to say goodbye... "
" What?! Where she's goin'? Did she told ya? "
" She's going... forever... she's not coming back... " Fluttershy ended the phrase almost soundless.
" Forever...? FOREVER?!! Oh, no! Of all the worst things that could happen... this is...the... worst... possible...
" Flutters, where did they go? Did you see it? " Quickly jumped RD.
" To the Everfree... "
" To the Everfree, to the Everfree. Why is always to the Everfree?! Is there no worst place to go, or what?! " Dashie
" But Flutters, did she told ya why she's leavin'? " Asked Applejack.
" She mentioned something about high treason and... "
" High treason?!! " All the mares startled.
" There is no such thing! " Rarity stood up. " I have her full pardon from Celestia right here! "
" Then Twilight surely doesn't know it! She must be thinking she's still a criminal! We have to find her and show it to
" Let's go! " They say at unison.
" Where? " Asked Fluttershy.
" How than where? How than where? To the Everfree, of course! " RD swung her hooves, annoyed.
" But to which part? That forest is huge! "
All of them looked at the forest.
" Buckings... " RD crossed her forelegs.
Twilight and I where walking through the forest, as we have decided to spend the night in my hideout so we can figure
" My love, why you didn't say goodbye to your other friends? " I asked her.
" Sorry, my love, but I don't think I could. Did you see how we left Fluttershy? If I have to say goodbye to a single
" Twi, are you alright? " I knelt to her, worried.
" Yes, I'm... fine. " She answered, shrinking her eyes an putting a hoof in her forehead.
" You're not. Don't lie to me. "
" Don't worry. It's just... that I haven't slept or eaten well from the day before yesterday, and I've done nothing but
" "Damn", huh? Now are you stuck with that dirty little word, eh? " I smirked.
" Yep. Who could be the culprit? " She smirked too, looking at me, and we both laughed.
" Come on, let's rest and eat something. " I sat at her side and took out some canned food from my backpack.
" That things are from your world? "
" Yep, they are. Come on, give them a try. "
" ...Mmm, it tastes good. "
After we finished our meal, we lie down sideways, looking at each other, smiling like two fool lovers. This was so
" Wait! Wait! Wait! " She stopped me with her forelegs. " I... I'm not ready for this! "
" What? Don't you love me Twi? "
" Yes, yes. I DO love you, but it's... we just known each other from so little time... and... "
" Sure, and if we were old fellas, the tale will be: "We known each other from too long". " I parodied, annoyed,
" No, no, no, my love, no. That wasn't what I meant. " She hugged me, with a condescent voice. " It's just... I'm just
" I'm 38. "
" 38? You could be my father...! If you were a pony, of course... Sorry, my love, it's... I just can't shake off the
I was about to ask her how much time she'll need, when:
" There they are! There they are! I've found them! " Announced RD from the sky above us.
" Damn it! " Twi and me said at the same time.
We stood up and started running.
" Let's split up! We'll meet at Zecora's house! " I told Twi.
" Acknowledged! "
And we splitted up.
RD threw herself over Twilight, but she teleported just before she could reach her.
" Sweet mother of Celestia! Twilight, don't run away, we want to help you! " Yelled RD, looking everywhere.
It didn't took too long to Pinkie Pie to reach Twilight.
" Twilight! Stop! Listen to me! Princess Celestia already gave full pardon to you! You haven't to run away anymore! Stop
Twilight looked at her with the side of the eye: She really wanted to believe her, but the memory of the playing dead
" Stop following me, Pinkie! Buck off! " Answered Twilight and teleported.
But it's not so easy to get rid of Pinkie:
" You can't run away from me! " The party mare reached her again. " Stop already, Twilight! Listen to reason! "
Twilight smiled: Look who's talking about reason! So she teleported, and teleported and teleported so many times that
" Gotcha! "
" Ah! Damn it, Pinkie! " Twilight startled.
Pinkie cornered her and started to walk toward her and to speak without taking breath between sentences:
" Twilight it's me Pinkie Pie! Don't you recognize me? No you can't because that mean monkey has cast a hypnotic spell
Pinkie stopped talking and threw a scared gasp, but she quickly recovered:
" There you are, you filthy ponynapper! I'm going to show you not to mess with my friends! " She screamed, putting her
In less than a second, Pinkie had jumped over my head, had bitten my hair and started pulling it to all directions,
" Ahhhrrrrrrgggg! Twilight, take her off me, take her off meeeee! " I screamed, pained, trying uselessly to shook her
Twilight, confused, was trying to aim her horn to the furious mare, and finally shot the remote teleport. Pinkie
Twilight gasped, frightened, and put a hoof in her muzzle.
I cast a healing spell on my head, and then turned around...
" Oh, crap... "
The other mares had arrived too.
" HE KILLED PINKIE PIEEEEEEEEE!!! " Fluttershy expelled all the air in her lungs.
Following act, Applejack, RD and Rarity threw herselves to buck me, while Fluttershy threw herself over Twilight:
" Don't worry, Twilight! I'm going to protect you from that monster with my life! Fear not, my friend! "
" Flutters, get off me! "
Fighting the three mares at the same time really put me at my limit. I had to act fast! I took the chance when
RD fell in her haunches on the ground, with her muzzle opened, and rubbing her sore cheek.
My eyes opened wide, and I frightened, because I can recognize the expression of a girl when she's pissed off.
And I mean REALLY"REALLY pissed off...
" Oh, crap! " I shouted with fear, and ran away.
But there were no way to escape from her! Even after casting the Lightfeet and the Muscle Toner spells, she continued
Fortunately, after a while, I could decipher a pattern, so, I got her timing, and when she came over me, I took her for
Twilight finally managed to get off from Fluttershy, and she fell at my direction. Fluttershy could see me, running
She made a scared shriek, and fell catatonic, loinside to the ground, with her hooves straight upside. Damn. If this
I got to Twilight:
" Twi, get us outa here! "
" But Pinkie, and Flutters! "
" They'll be fine, take us out, now! "
A little while after we had dissapeared, Pinkie recovered conciousness and stood up stumbling, smiling and with the
" Where I am...? Wow. I haven't had so much fun since... since... " She puts a forehoof over the lump in her head.
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 9 : A conspiracy is gestating:
Twilight and I appeared in a cliff, in the other side outside the Everfree Forest. I looked around: Nopony had followed
" Twilight, what's happening? "
She didn't answer.
" Twi? "
She started gradually to tremble, until she launched an angered scream, her coat became yellow and her mane and tail
" AHHHHHHHRRRRRRGGGGGGGG! " She levitated for a while, and after that she fell all scrambled up. Then, she turned to me
" This is your fault!! This is your fault!! If you never had showed up, none of this would have ever happened!! "
" Twi, what's happening to you?! "
" Don't call me Twi! For your fault, I had to fight my best friends, the very ones I've swear to protect with my very
I didn't say a thing. Just came closer to her, knelt at her side and hugged her. She hugged me as well:
" I'm sorry, my love, forgive me... I'm just so confused... I don't know what to think... " She sobbed.
" Don't worry, my love. Whatever fate we have to face, we'll face it together. "
Twilight looked me straight to the eyes:
" You must know... that now you are the only one that keeps me alive. Please, don't abandon me too. My heart it's not
" Twi, I'll never abandon you, for no reason, never, ever. Because I love you, over all things in the world. "
She smiled, and threw her muzzle over my mouth, but I stopped her:
" Hey, didn't you said that you weren't ready for this? "
" Are we truly ready for anything at all? " She smiled, and we kissed passionately.
And, for the first time in several days, we felt peace at last...
The dream realm. Luna's domain. What exactly she was looking for? That was something that was unknown to
" Alright, pretty face. Show your cuteness already. " Said Seymour.
Luna made herself visible.
" How did...? How did you know that we were here? "
" It's called lucid dreams. I can be sleeping and awake at the same time. "
" How...? That... that's not possible! "
" Well, from where I came, it's completely possible. With training, of course. Why did you come back? "
" We need answers! "
" What answers? I've already told all I know. Did you get punished for doing the right thing, again? "
Luna startled. How did he knows?
" Your sister never listens to you, did she? She always humilliates you and mistreats you, like you were a prickle in
" Stop it! Stop it already! " Luna walked back, sobbing.
" You wanted answers. I'm giving them to you. I never say you were gonna like them. "
Luna were almost crying.
" Please... we need to know how to find Twilight... tell us, please! "
" Ahhhh. The little traitor is now missing? Why I'm not surprised? That's what traitors do when they get uncovered:
" Nooooo"o"o"oooo! " Luna were crying already.
" What's that for? Your sister is gonna send you to the moon again, if the little traitor is never to be found? "
" Yeeeeeessss! " Luna laid to the floor, heartbroken. " Why she don't simply kill usssss?! Why play with us, like we
" And that's all you're gonna do? Lie to cry and wait for your doom? "
" But, what else can we do?! We can't defeat her, she's stronger than us! "
" You defeated her once. The time you returned, remember? And then, it was the little traitor who defeated you, if I can
Luna raised the head and perked the ears, hopeful.
" Smart girl. I see you've figured out were I'm going to. Of course, in your current state, you cannot defeat her, but
Luna hesitated for a while, but finally, her facial expresion hardened, and her eyes sharpened, filled with rage and
" Say, prisoner, what can we do to help you? " She asked, with the voice of Nightmare Moon.
" Well, first of all, stop calling me "prisoner", I have a name: Seymour. Second, stop talking about yourself in plural
Luna put her hoof in her throat and gulped.
" And lastly... " Seymour put his hand in his pocket and raised his crushed VR googles. " ...fix this for me... "
" Are you sure about this, my love? " I asked Twilight, concerned.
" Yes, I'm, 100 percent sure. There's nothing left for me here. I want to go with you to your world. Start a new life,
I raised the VR googles, fully charged and operational.
" Well then. Ready to go? "
" Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! " She jumped in place, joyful. She looks so cute!
I was about to press the "Exit" option, when she stopped me with a hoof:
" Wait! I have completely forgotten about Spike! We can't leave him just like this! "
I raised a brow...
Celestia were attending her daily duties, when Luna surprisingly comes by, dragging a strange barrel"shaped metallic
" Ah! Hello, little sister. Why aren't you resting? Is there something important that you want to discuss with me...?
" Oh no, not at all, it's just that I've found this marvelous device, and I was so excited about that I didn't want to
" A device? What kind of device? "
" This one? Well, it's called a Sundial. "
" A Sundial? And what it does? "
" Well, normally, Sundials just show what time is it, based in the sun's position in the sky. Pretty useless here,
She used her magic to manipulate the sundial's controls, and rolled a dial right. The sun moved to the right.
" Oh! Looooook, it moveeeed! Now to the left. "
She rolled the dial backwards, and the sun moved backwards.
" Wow! Did you see that, sister? It's not extraordinary? "
Celestia step down from her throne, concerned:
" Luna, what are you doing? "
" And look! It can go up... and down! "
The sun went up and down.
" Luna, stop it! "
" And now to twirl! " Luna rolled the dials and the sun started to twirl.
" Luna, that's enough! Stop it at once! "
" And it can raise the moon too! Look, night, day, night, day, night, day...! "
Day and night started to pass quickly.
" Luna, that's enough!! " Celestia used her magic to take apart the device from her sister.
" Why did you do that, sister? If it's so fun! "
" Luna, have you gotten crazy? Where did you find that thing? Answer me! "
" Who cares where I found it! With that device, now our services are no longer required. We can have holidays! Imagine!
Celestia sat on her haunches:
" Luna, look, I do really appreciate your efforts to release me from my duties, but I really need... "
" I was joking. " Luna interrupted her.
" Pardom me? "
" About the holidays. "
" Luna, I don't understand you. "
" You're not going on holidays. You're... just going. "
Celestia remained speechless for a moment, processing what Luna had said. Then, she adopted a defensive stance.
" Wait, wait, wait, wait, because I believe I don't heared you well! Are you defying me, Lu..?! " She couldn't end the
Seymour emerged from inside the Sundial, and quickly took down all the nearby guards. Then, he whiffed the cannon of
" Help! I'm being attacked! Help! " Celestia screamed, trembling of pain.
Then, Seymour transformed in the predator and went toward her.
" I expect you to put some fight, or I'm gonna make you suffer! Mwahahahahahaha! "
Shining Armor and his guards came quickly, but Luna stood in front of them.
" Where are you going so fast, Captain? Don't you see that Celestia is busy? " She mocked.
" Luna, how could you...?! Guards, arrest her! " Shining Armor ordered.
Suddenly, crashing the windows, plenty of predators entered the room, and engaged battle with Shining Armor and his
Predator Seymour tried to reach Celestia, but she used a powerful magic attack and made him retreat. Then, he just
" Luna! What are you doing?!! He's going to kill me!! "
" Oh, no, don't worry, sister. He's not going to kill you. I AM going to kill you. "
" NO LUNA NO PLEASE NO AHHHHHHHHHH!!! " Celestia rapidly bucked of pure terror when she saw Luna lighten her horn.
" Just joking! "
" What? "
But at that moment, another plasma blaster knocked Celestia down.
Normal Seymour walked to Luna's side.
" I didn't know you had so perverse sense of humour, pretty face. I think we're going to get along well. "
They both threw an evil chuckle.
" Whaaaaaaahahahah! Whaaaaaaahahahah! How she could do that to meeeee?! " Cried Spike in his basket " How she's going to
Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy were unsuccessfully trying to calm him down, as Dashie were still flying looking for
" Don't cry, darling. Fluttershy can take care of you. Isn't Flutters? " Rarity proposed.
" Of course, Spikey, I can take care of you, I have enough space to you to play, many little animal friends... "
" No! I don't want anypony else! I want Twilight! Whaaaaaaahahahah! Bring me Twiliiiiiight!! "
Fluttershy retreated, and looked sadly to the other ponies.
At that very moment, the door was knocked. Spike like a lightning got out from his basket, rambling:
" It's her! It's her! It has to be her! " And opened the door. " Twi...! Who are you? "
Fluttershy turned around and she saw : A familiar bipedal creature, covered with a large rainco...!
" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! "
Twilight and me were approaching ponyville taking an alternate course.
" Are you sure we're not going to be spotted? Remember that you aren't precisely a hiding expert. "
" Ah! Come on! Stop teasing me! Will you? " Twilight protested, gently pushing me with a hoof.
We both laughed.
" Alright, alright. We're close. Remember. Nopony. Nopony at all. Just Spike, Ok? " Twilight reminded me.
But when we arrived to Ponyville, the town was deserted.
" Woah, this is weird. Where's everybody? " I asked, rubbing the back of my head.
" Ohhh. Could all the town have gone to find me? " Worried Twilight, putting a hoof in her chin.
I was about to reply that was very unlikely, when my alarm sense triggered.
" Twi, run! " I warned her, just before a bunch of aliens and predators appeared from nowhere!
I cast a rapid fire blaster gun and started to take them down:
" Twi! Didn't you heard me?!! Run!! "
" I won't let you down! " She replied, firing with her magic as well.
" Let's go to the Everfree!! Move!! "
We run back to the forest, while hordes of monsters were pursuin us. Some of them managed to reach us, forcing me to
From the Canterlot castle, Seymour were enjoying the view.
" Ohhh, poor of them. Don't they? They're so outnumbered. Let me even the odds a bit. "
From nowhere, gigantic flying aliens and predators appeared.
" Oh, crap! " I frightened, and after taking down the last mini alien, I cast a hover bike, mounted Twilight in and ran
The forest started to be teared apart by the gigantic horde: Soon there will be nowhere to hide or run.
" Love, quick, that way! " Twilight indicated me with her hoof.
I followed the direction she told me, until I could see a cave.
" Shoot inside the cave! "
" What? " I didn't get it.
" Do it! "
I did so, and right after, a roar sounded from the depths of the cave, and an Ursa Minor emerged from there. The beast
From the depths of the cave, an even stronger roar was heared, and the Ursa Major appeared!
Then, the combat really got ugly.
Aliens, predators and debris of trees and soil started to fell around us, almost crushing us! Even going at high speed
But just when I was taking off, a mountain"like pile of debris fell over us. We aren't gonna make it! Without thinking
Seymour, cozyly sitting in the castle's balcony, were enjoying the show with a pair of binoculars, and mocked:
" Hey, girls, come to see this! " He levitated the cage where the rest of the Mane 6 and Celestia where held, and put it
When Twilight recovered conciousness, the battle was still raging on. She desperately called for me, and then, she saw
" Don't worry, my love! I'm coming to save you! " She ran to the debris and started to remove it.
" Gus, my love! Where are you?! Answer me please! " She dug desperately, because she didn't know were I was, while
Then, she came out with an idea, and cast a Life Force detection spell...
Her eyes widened, her body trembled, the sweat covered her face: Nothing... Nothing was detected... That means...
" My beloved... my... beloved... is... dead... DEAD! NO! He can't be dead! He can't...! "
She puts her forelegs over the debris, shrunk her tearful eyes, trembling from hooves to head, while the battle
Twilight put a hoof in her chest, because she felt a pain in her heart beyond all description.
" Agh. " She mourned, like she had received a mortal wound, which in fact was.
She fell on her side, shivering, her legs stretched with an agonic stertor, her eyes goes up, and her heart stopped
The Ursa Major finally defeated the last colossal alien, and withdrew to her lair, exhausted.
" Well, it seems that the party is over. " Mocked Seymour. " Hey, pretty face, can you sense the little traitor? "
Luna lightened her horn.
" Nope. She's gone. " She said with a regal tone, but she couldn't skip a slight smile momentarily in her face.
The imprisoned mares gasped with terror and concern. Celestia broke to cry as never she was seen before.
" Oh, Twilighttttt... " Mourned the mares.
" Oh, poor Celestia. It seems that your faithful student is no more... Ha, ha, ha! " Cruelly mocked Seymour. " And the
Luna lightened her horn again.
" He's gone too. " She reported with the same cold blood as before.
" Oh, poor ponies, no one can save you now... Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!! " Cruelly mocked Seymour again. " Well, I guess
He made a toast with Luna, and both left, leaving the cage in the balcony.
" To the Tartarus with you, Luna! I'll never forgive you! You'll pay for this! You hear me?! You'll PAAAAAAAY!! "
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The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 10 : What doesn't kill you makes you stronger:
A lightning stroke my mind, and I recovered conciousness. Twilight! She's dying! I have no idea how I survived the
I quickly started a Cardio Vascular Reanimation, blowing air to her muzzle and electrifying her chest, to bring her
" Come on, Twi, don't do this to me! Come on! Come back to me, please! " I mourned, with a mix of fear, rage and sadness.
After three failed attemps, I was already panicking.
" Come on, Twi! I know you can hear me! I'm here! I'm here! Come back to me, please! " I punched her chest instead of
" My love...! My love...! " She could barely say.
" Breath, my love, breath. That's it, my love, that's it. " I hold her and cast healing spells on her until her
" My looooove... I thought I had lost youuuuu... " She cried.
" No, you're not. I told you I wasn't leaving for nothing in the world. Are you alright? "
" Now I am... " She answered, laughing meekly, relieved.
" Come on, let's go to Zecora's place, if that still exists. " I charged her and carried her there.
Luckily, it still was. Zecora received us not without certain wariness. Maybe it's because she still feel something
" Twi, my love, I have to check your friends in ponyville. I'm worried about them. " I told her, putting her in a bed.
" Alright. " She agreed, trying to get back in her hooves.
" No, my love. You're still in very bad shape after that heart attack. Stay here until I return. "
" No! What about if that things attack you again?! I have to be there to protect you! " She protested, concerned.
" Twi! Stay! Right! Here! " I emphasized pointing down with my finger.
I stepped outside Zecora's house, pondering what to do. I couldn't find my VR googles anywhere. It probably got
After a while, finally, the mares inside the cage stopped crying, accepting their ominous fate: Celestia was completely
" Princess, now what's going to be of us? " Finally asked RD.
Celestia didn't say anything nor moved.
" Don't you see, Dashie? We're all going to die, along with all our dreams and hopes! Why the life has to be so cruel
" Well, that might be true, eh? " Seymour suddenly appeared behind them, startling them and making them gasp.
Celestia still didn't move: She seems to have given up.
" What do you want from us?! Why are you keeping us here?! " RD defied him.
" Because... " He opened the cage, and using his VR googles, took Pinkie Pie out while leaving the others inside.
" We'll never help you! " Shouted RD.
" Ohhhh, you will. " Seymour bragged, putting a bridle to the party mare. " And, you. You'll be my personal entertainer,
Luna, who was hidden nearby, hearing and seeing all, scowled, and a side of her lips quivered, letting her teeth on view.
" Are you loco in the coco? Read my lips: I'll never, and I mean never EVER, do a party for you! Period! " Pinkie denied
" You can't imagine how I'm going to enjoy breaking you up. " Seymour looked at her with an evil smirk.
" I don't care! You can break all my bones, and I'll still won't do any party for you! "
Seymour laughed.
" Ohhhh, so innocent. That's so cute. Now move! You'll learn to obey your master! " He slapped Pinkie's face, making
" You filthy abuser! Let me out from this cage and I'll buck your lights out! " Exclaimed RD.
" So, you want some of it too, don't you? Then, I'll get you served! " He said and took RD out too.
Seymour dragged and tied Pinkie and RD on a gloomy dungeon, and took a whip in his hands.
" Well, well. " He make the whip to clash. " Shall we begin? "
Rainbow Dash never thought that so much pain could be felt. She had felt some during her trainings and crashes, but
" Well, have you had enough? " She heard her torturer ask.
She slowly rolled her shaking head to him, panting and with half closed eyes and opened muzzle.
" Please, stop, please... I can't take... anymore of this... "
" Did you heared that, Pink Ponk? Not even the strongest of your friends can stand against Super Seymour! " He adopted a
Pinkie, shaking and panting too, slowly looked at him:
" I've already... told you... I won't be doing... any party... for... you... "
Dashie opened her eyes. How that was possible! How she can withstand that beating, and still resist?!
Then she gets it:
Pinkie was stronger than her. Not in physical strenght, but in willpower. And for what all her physical strenght and
She felt sorry for herself. She was a loser and a good for nothing. That's what she was. That's why she had to leave
Dashie heartbroke. All her dreams from to be part of the Wonderbolts, became just a silliness: They'll never accept
Then, why to live for...? Her friends! Of course! They've always supported her, and accepted her just like she was,
Dashie felt how her will to live returned, and all the doubts and fears left her mind an heart. She knows now what she
" Well, well, it looks that our little Pink Ponk needs more attentionk! Puahahahahaha! " Seymour laughs his own bad
" Hey, you bucking worm... " Said Dashie faintly.
" Huh? " Seymour looks at her.
" Don't you heard what she said? You'll have... no... PARTIES! " Dashie finds yet the strenght to yell.
" Oh! Oh jo jo jo jo jo! But what's this?! Do you have set an agreement and all?! Ha, ha, ha! " Then, he turns to
Pinkie opened her eyes and muzzle, frightened.
" Well, I declare the contest opened! " Seymour raises the whip over RD again. RD closes her eyes, but there's no fear
" No! " Pinkie yells. " Alright, alright! I'll do what you want! I'll do what you want! Just don't hit her anymore,
Seymour lowered the whip, satisfied:
" Good girl. "
Seymour was giving turns and more turns in his spinning chair, in the edge of joy.
" At last! My first night with Pinkie Pie is tonight! " He rubbed his hands. " At last, after so many years! Yeahhhhh!!
Then, he looked forward, and saw Luna in front of him.
" Ah! Pretty face, what have I told you about knocking the door, dear? I could be doing some nasty stuff, you know? Heh,
Luna remained speechless.
" What's happening to you, pretty face? Need something? Just pitch and catch! " Seymour made a gesture like making a
" Seymour, I thought we have something. " She scowled.
" Of course we have something. We have an agreement. " Seymour shrugged.
" That's not what I meant! " Luna hits the floor with a forehoof.
Seymour opened his arms and shooks his head with a smirk.
" Then, enlight me, please. "
" Don't use your mental tricks on me, Seymour! You know of what I'm talking about! " Yelled Luna, starting to get upset.
" Ah! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! My pretty face is jealous! " Seymour almost fell back from his laughter.
" Please, Seymour, don't play with my feelings! I love you! " Luna cried.
" And I love you too, pretty face. " Seymour put a hand on Luna's face, an petted her.
Luna closed the eyes, smiling, and turn slowly her head, blushing.
" Well, sorry, pretty face, but you'll have to wait for your turn. "Pink Ponk" comes first round. " Seymour indicated.
Seymour's VR googles dissapeared from his head.
" Hey! Pretty face! What are you doing?! Give me my stuff back! " He ordered.
" No. "
" No?! How than no?! Would you want me to...?! " Seymour threatened Luna with his fist, clenching his teeth.
" TO WHAT?!!! " Luna's almighty dual voice threw back Seymour to his chair, where he remained, scared.
" Pretty face... what are you doing...? " He asked with frightened voice.
" I'm just protecting what is mine. " Answered Luna, with her normal voice again.
" But, pretty face, I do really need my VR googles, to get my personal stuff. Please, pretty face, give it back to me.
" I'm not leaving you without your personal stuff, my stallion. Just ask what you need, and I'll serve you. "
" Alright, then give me the VR googles. "
Luna chuckled.
" Sorry, my stallion, but that's not how this works. Rules has changed. First, stop calling me "Pretty face", I have a
Seymour stared at her, surprised:
" Oh my God, you're in heat! "
" In heat? What a disgusting term! " Luna swungs her hoof up an down with disgust. " Heat is for animals. We ponies got
" Pretty...? "
" I TOLD YOU THAT MY NAME IS PRINCESS LUNAAAAAAAAA!!! "
Seymour is dragged by Luna's almighty dual voice up to the wall, where he was pushed by an air gust during the yell's
" Ok, Ok. Princess Luna... There's no need to get violent... " Seymour put his hands before him, now completely scared.
" Good stallion. " Luna said with a flirting voice, slowly walking to him. " Can you do a favor to me? "
" Yes. Yes. Sure. " Seymour nods nervously.
" Pick that pegasi and that... "Pink Ponk", and put them back in the cage. "
" Pre... Princess...? " Tried to protest Seymour.
" AT ONCE!!! " Luna indicated with a foreleg.
Seymour lowered the head, submitting, and went to carry on the order...
RD and Pinkie Pie were thrown without any care back in the cage.
" Ohhhhh, what heartless monster could do this... " Rarity horrified, putting both forelegs in her face, looking at the
" ...won't be able to fly again...? " RD completed the line, scared to death. " I won't be able to fly again?! No! NO!!
" You monster! Abusive! Shameless! How could you do this to my friends! " Rarity chastised Seymour, sobbing. " Let me at
" Yes, sure. " Seymour replied and left.
At that moment, Celestia reacted at last, opened the eyes, and saw that dantesque scene. Her eyes quivered. That was
" Applejack... " She whispered.
" Erm... Ya, yar highness? "
" Do you still have ropes with you? "
" Ya, ah've them on ma hat, why? "
" I want you to wrap it on my horn, and take out the magic dampening ring. "
" Yar highness? "
" Haven't you heard? Take. The bucking. Ring. Out! "
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 11 : Retaliation:
I walked back in direction to Ponyville, but stopped before leaving the Everfree. I couldn't risk myself to be spotted
When I arrived there, I scouted the field and could saw three ponies on the distance, one of them laid in the ground. I
I think he's hurt. Or worst. Better check him out.
When I approached, Applebloom spotted me:
" Granny, they'ra comin' baaaaaaaaack!! Ruuuuun!! Ahhhhhhhhhh!! " She screamed, horrified, and ran away. Granny
I ran to Big Mac and inspected him: He was injured pretty badly. I quickly cast a healing spell on him.
" Stay away fro' ma brotheeeeeeer! " I could hear a cry behind me.
" I'm trying to save him, so hold your horses! Will you? " I replied, annoyed.
I finished healing him, and tapped his cheek, trying him to come back to his senses.
" Hey, dude. Are you alright? "
I almost haven't time to dodge a hoof headed directly to my face. He's fine.
" Whoa, whoa! Hold your horses, dude! " I stood up and stepped back to a safe distance from him.
Big Mac stood up too, still stumbling, throwing me daggers from the eyes.
" Hey, take it easy, pal. Your wounds could get open again. " I tried to calm him down.
" Brotheeeeeeer! Ya'ra aliveeeeeee! " Applebloom galloped back to him, in the edge of happiness, and hugged him.
This seems to calm him down.
" See? I'm here to help. " I quickly took the chance, pointing my hands to me.
Then, I looked to Granny Applesauce, and I couldn't skip a smile: She was plain asleep.
" Applebloom, where's your sister? Twilight is looking for her. "
" Hey, ar' you friend o' Twilight? "
" Yes, I'm. "
" An' why she's nat with ya? "
Heh, that clever filly.
" Those things want to capture her. "
" Ta capture her taa?! Like ma sister?! "
" They captured her? Where they took her? "
" Ah saw them goin' on Canterlot's way, but Ah'm not sure. Ah was taa scared to look... "
Seymour knocked at Luna's room door:
" Luna, my princess, it's Seymour. "
" Come in, come in, my stallion! "
He entered, came near her and sat on a confy couch.
" Did you carry on my order, my stallion? "
" Yeah... I did. " He confirmed with apathy.
" Why the long face, my stallion? Think on all the fun we're going to have tonight! " Luna happily bumped on her bed.
Seymour obeyed and walked with weariness to her bed.
" But why are you so saaaad? Are you still thinking on that Pink Ponk, or what?! " Luna started to piss off.
" No! I mean... is that... I don't understand. If we won already, why do you have them alive? I mean... I can understand
" Ohhh. Is that I have plans to them. "
" Plans? What plans? "
" I'm going to destroy every and each thing they love most, and I going to make them watch, later, I'll banish all them
" Wow, my princess, you really took it seriously with your vengeance stuff. Remember me to never piss you off. " Seymour
" Ohh, my stallion. You're as wise as always. " Luna smiled and blushed, swinging a hoof.
Somepony knocked the door again:
" Your highness, it's your captain. May I enter? "
" You may enter, captain. "
A frowned Shining Armor entered the room, holding a scroll with his magic.
" Your highness, the list you requested. "
" Ow! That's what I call efficiency! Well done, captain. Behave well and your beloved Cadance will live. " Luna tapped
Luna unwrapped the scroll to read it, but instead she looked to the side.
" Don't slam the door, captain. Behave yourself. "
Shining Armor threw a ponycide stare to her from behind the half"opened door, and closed it slowly.
" Are you sure that you should keep him as your royal guard captain? He looks like he's gonna betray you anytime. "
" Oh, don't worry, my stallion. While I have his beloved marefriend in my power, he'll be quietty, quietty. "
Suddenly, a sound like metal hitting metal resonated.
" What's that?! " Seymour startled, scared.
" Bah, that's surely my sister in other of her tantrums. " Luna replied without caring too much.
The sounds repeated, but louder and including broken glass and monsters roars.
" Your sister's trantums are always so loud? " Seymour inquired, worried.
Luna startled, dropped the scroll and teleported to the balcony, finding the cage break open and Celestia flying away,
" What the Tartarus?! Guards, catch them! Quick! " Ordered Luna, raising a hoof.
A flying alien squadron took off after the runaways, but were intercepted by a pegasi squadron as well, and an aerial
" What the...?! " Luna looks below, where, at the castle doors, were standing an impassive Shining Armor.
" You ordered me to stay quietty! "
" What in the Tart...?! Order your troops to buck off! AT ONCE!!! " She yells, angered.
" Troops, carry on your princess' duty! " Exclaimed Shining Armor.
Luna looks upside smiling, but the smile dissapears quickly, as the battle still continued. Then, she looks to Shining
" What the...?! Captain, you'll pay for this betrayal!! " She screams. Then, she looks upside again, furious. " Why I
Rarity was the first to spot Luna's take off:
" Your highness! There comes that evildoer! Quick, teleport away, please! "
" I can't teleport while carrying five ponies! I could leave one behind! " Rued Celestia.
" Princess, don't worry about us! Save yourself! " Exclaimed Pinkie Pie.
" No way! Or we escape all, or we don't escape any! " She asseverated. " Pinkie Promise! "
" Your highness?! " All the mares surprised.
" I already lost Twilight... " Tears dropped from her eyes. " I won't afford to lose anypony else! Not even one! "
Suddenly, Luna teleported in front of her.
" Well, sister, it looks that you won't lose one, but five at once! " She smirked.
Celestia closed her eyes.
" Sorry, my ponies... " And teleported them to safety in the ground.
" This is between you and me, Luna. Let my ponies away from this! " She defied Luna.
" Let my ponies this, let my ponies that, blah"blah"blah"blah"blah"blah"blah. " Mocked Luna, shooking her head
" That's not my decision, Luna, and you know it! "
" But sending me to the moon was, you bucker scum! If you had dug a bit deeper, like my stallion Seymour did, you'll
" Luna, I can't recognize you... " Celestia startled. " Or is that you're Nightmare Moon... again?! "
" Don't be silly, sister. If I was Nightmare Moon, everything will be darkness right now. But you're right... I'm not
A tear slided on Celestia's cheek.
" THEN YOU LET ME NO CHOICE!!! " She screamed as well, enlightening her horn. " EN GUARDE!!! "
She launched a lightning against Luna, but it faded on a gigantic flaming sword that emerged from her horn.
Celestia hadn't time to get surprised! The magickal sword started to attack her several times per second! She never
I was sitting at the forest border, pondering my next move: If I go carelessly near Canterlot, Seymour could spot me,
Suddenly, a shine in the sky catched my eye. I cast an Enhanced Sight spell, and could see the havoc's cause: Celestia
Then, I happened to look below, and could see the rest of the Mane 6, looking motionless at the battle. They'll surely
As I could see, Celestia's body was all covered with cuts, scratches and bruises, while Luna was intact. Celestia's
...And it looks that the combat has ended...
I'll need to approach the mares, but just by myself will be unwise, as the last time we met wasn't in the best of
While falling, Celestia felt strangely lightheaded, like if a heavy burden were removed from her shoulders. All the
She'll leave the world of the living with no remorse, with no regret. She had played her part, had given the best of
Celestia closed her eye, as she saw the ground come closer...
The mares were shocked by that horrible sight: The bloody body of Celestia, falling from the sky. They can't believe
Now, all is lost...
Celestia opened her eye. Shouldn't she be dead by now?
" Oh, no, no, no, sister. You're not going to get away so easily. " Luna smirked. " Because, first, you need to see how
Celestia closed her only eye and broke crying, completely helpless...
" Come on, Rainbow Dash, you look like a turtle! " The mares were galloping, trying to hide somewhere, but RD needed to
Then, AJ looked backwards, just to find that she actually was dragging Dashie, who, with closed eyes and four legs laid in
" Rainbow Dash, fer Celestia's sake! Stand up! "
" Leave me, AJ... " She meekly pleaded.
" What?! Ha da think ah goin' to leave ya behind, huh?! Stand up already, we hav' to escape! "
" Don't you understand, AJ...? I can't fly anymoooore... My life is ruineeeeed... Leave me, pleaaaaase... " RD lowly cried.
" Don't worry, AJ, we'll help you! " The rest of the mares returned and with everypony's help, carried RD to the Everfree.
Once there, they hid as good as they could.
" I'm going to check is there's no dangerous animal nearby. I'll be back right away. " Said Fluttershy.
So, she trotted and looked around, everything looked safe if it wasn't for... A familiar bipedal creature, covered
Fluttershy passed out.
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 12 : When the heart rules on:
" Flutters? Flutters? " Among reveries, Fluttershy believed to hear Twilight's voice. There was no doubt. The bipedal
Fluttershy started to cry.
" I'm sorry Angel, I'm so sorryyyyyy... "
" But Flutters, Angel is not here. "
Oh, no! The bipedal monster has eaten Angel too!
Fluttershy cried even louder.
" Flutters! Cut it out! It's me, Twilight! "
Fluttershy shook her head, and she could see Twilight's face clearly:
" Twilight!! You're not dead! You're not dead! Ha, ha, ha, ha! " They both hugged and cried of happiness.
Then, Fluttershy heared something and looked at me.
" Don't worry, Flutters. He has been protecting me all this time. Are you alright? "
The animal caretaker mare nodded.
" Where are the others? Are they alright too? "
" Well, Pinkie is hurt pretty badly, but Rainbow Dash is even worse. "
Twilight frightened:
" Oh, no! Take me to them! "
The other mares startled and gasped very much when they saw us:
" Twilight! Ha could ya still walkin' aroun' with that monster?! " Screamed AJ, with a mixture of anger and fear.
" Yes! How could you?! Look what the other one did to Rainbow Dash an me! " Added Pinkie, enraged, pointing a hoof to
" Oh, dear, and you even attacked us! I hate to say this, but it looks like that you... " Started to say Rarity, but
" My friends... " Started to reply Twilight. " I know what you all are thinking about me, but I want you to know... "
She drooped to the ground, crying.
Alright, if that doesn't touch them, nothing will. I was touched already.
The mares stared each other, except Dashie, who was like with a hoof in the grave. Rarity was crying too.
Fluttershy was the first to hug Twilight.
" Of course I forgive you, Twilight. I'm sure that all this was a misunderstanding. "
Rarity soon followed.
" Forgive me, Twilight! Forgive for doubting youuuuu! " She cried.
Now AJ and Pinkie had tearful eyes too.
" Of course we forgive you, Twilight! " They hugged her and all of them cried together.
If I keep watching this scene I'll start to cry too, so I rushed to check Dashie's wounds...
Luna dragged Shining Armor to the cell where she has Cadance imprisoned, and threw in front of the bars.
" There you have. Take a last look to your marefriend, scum. " She angrily chastised him.
" Shining Armor? My love? " Cadance leaned to the bars.
" My love. I'm sorry. I've failed you. "
" No, you haven't, you haven't. Anything that you could have done, is fine by me. You have nothing to apologize for. "
They managed to hug and kiss between the bars and cried together.
" Well, well. Very touching. " Mocked Luna. " Now, Cadance, time to die. "
" No, Luna, no! Please, no! I beg you! " Shining Armor pleaded. " Kill me instead! Kill me instead! But don't kill
Luna smirked.
" I warned you, captain, and you betrayed me... "
" No, Luna, no, please, no! "
" Ohhh, you're dissapointing me, captain. Are you going to keep pleading, even after I killed your little sister,
Shinining Armor stopped pleading. The rage that filled his heart after hearing that, was simply too much.
" You're... a monster... A BUCKING MONSTER! " He stood up, defiantly, enlightening his horn. " What do you want, eh? Do
Luna smirked.
" That's how I like it... But I don't want to fight you. You're too lame. "
" What?! "
" What I do need, is you to find and capture the remaining runaway mares, dead or alive. Alive, preferably. "
Shining Armor startled. That bucking alicorn was just playing with him?
" This is your last call, captain. Fail me this time, and Cadance will pay the price. Dismiss. "
Shininng Armor stood still. His head was spinning. What was this, some kind of perverse game?
It seems he has no choice this time. The very life of his marefriend depended on the fulfillment of Luna's orders. And
He has no choice...
Rainbow Dash opened her beautiful magenta eyes:
" Twilight...? Did I died? Thanks to Celestia! "
" Dashie! What are you talking about?! I'm alive, and so you too! "
" Buckings... "
" But Dashie, aren't you happy to see me? "
" Yes, Twilight, I'm so happy to see you... " She said with weariness, forcing a smile.
" Hey, faster flier in Equestria, flap that wings and tell me how they feel. " I told her.
" That was awesome, my love! " Twilight amazed. " Your healing skills overly surpass even mine! "
" Heh, sure. But I can't still teleport. " I clarified.
RD opened her eyes wide. Do they could really mean...? Skeptical at first, she straightened her wings... There they
" OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH! My wings! You healed them!! You healed them!! " She stood up and jumped of happiness. " I can fly
" Ahemm! " Twilight pulled her for the tail. " That's enough Dashie, he already knows how grateful you are. "
" No, he don't! "
" Dashieeee. "
" Oh. Alright. Sorry. " She got it at last and broke the hug.
" Alright, girls, now that I finished healing you, I can pay attention to you. What happened in the castle? " I asked
" Oh, that was horrible! That monster and Luna allied together, and... " Rarity stopped, and scrambled the mouth.
" And what happened?! Did they do something to Princess Celestia?! " Twilight panicked.
The mares lowered her heads and ears, and closed their eyes.
" What?! What did they do to her?! Answer me! "
" Twilight... ya must be strong... " Said AJ, putting a hoof in her shoulder.
" No... No... No, no, no, nonononono NOOOOOOO!! " Twilight screamed, and I hugged her tightly, afraid that she could
" Breath, my love. Breath. " I petted her mane and kissed her forehead.
That's it. This time, Seymour had signed his death entence...
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 13 : Master and Commander:
" All is loooost! Celestia is gooooooone! All is looooooost! " Twilight mourned, tightly hugging me.
This was plain awful. Watching Twilight suffering like that really got me: I can't let her like that, her heart wasn't
" No, my love, no. All is not lost. We can fight back. We must! "
" What? " Twilight broke the hug and stared straight to me.
" We have to fight back! " I stated with determination. " We can't leave Seymour and Luna at their will! I don't know
" But, how? Celestia is gone... What can we do? "
" We must retrieve the Elements of Magic, and take them down! "
Twilight's face enlightened:
" Of course! That's right! I have completely forgotten about them...! But how we're going to retrieve them? The castle
" Don't worry, Twi. I'll figure it out. But, for the time being... " I turned to the rest of the mares. " All of you
" What? We? " Fluttershy and Rarity panicked.
" Yes, you. "
" But ha wa're goin' ta do that? Ah don't hav' any horn or wings, ya know? " AJ protested.
" You don't need any horns. " I smiled.
" What?! " They all surprised.
" That's right. You only need your hooves. You can use them to cast magic like they were horns. "
" But, but, how's that possible? " Dashie inquired.
" I came out with that conclusion, after I saw you casting a lightning from a cloud just by hitting it. "
" Wowwwwww. " Dashie amazed.
" That's right. Damn, I learned to use magic too, and I haven't horn or hooves. So, why you not? " I stood up before
First, I approached Rarity. Being an unicorn, it will be easier for her, right?
" Rarity, I have here a list of combat spells that you have to learn. "
" What? Me and a fight? Oh, no dear! That's like water and vinegar! I'll never put a beautiful and clean pony like me in
" Alright, alright! " I tapped her muzzle, annoyed. " No fighting for you, then... "
" Thank you, thank you, dear! " She hugged me.
" Ok, Rarity. Go to do... something pretty around... " I made an annoyed gesture.
" You bet I will! " She smiled and left.
Then, I turned to the pegasi. Maybe I'll have better luck with them.
" Alright, Dashie, Flutters. You already knew the basics of focusing, you only have to change the way it's done. Now,
They did as I said.
" It's working, it's working! " Happily bumped Dashie. " Now what? "
" Well, now, keep moving the hooves, but also imagine that there's an energy ball growing between them. Go ahead. "
Dashie managed to do it quickly.
" Bravo, Dashie! You're a natural! " I happily cheered her.
" You bet I am! "
" Great, Dashie. Listen, what you have there is what is called a "Hadou" "
" A "Hadou"? "
" Exactly, and the attack you're going to perform is called "Hadou"ken". "
" Well, it's a funny name, but I got it. " Dashie giggled.
" Well, Dashie, now pitch the ball against that boulder. "
" There I go! Say goodbye, boulder! " Happily exclaimed Dashie and pitched the ball, but it dissintegrated not even
" Ohhhh. " Dashie regretted, dissapointed.
" Don't worry, Dashie. That's normal. You'll have to practice it several times until you can do it right. Come on! You
" Then I'll practice until I can do it better that even you! " Happily claimed the pegasi, resuming the drill. " Hadou"
Then, I turned to Fluttershy, who was still moving her hooves, with no success.
" How you're doing, Flutters? "
" Can you explain me that "Voodoo" thing again? " She shiyly asked.
" Ok, ok. Maybe that's not for you. Let's focus on healing spells better. "
" But you're already too good at it. " She looks like she's giving up.
" Yes, I am, Flutters, but if I get wounded, who's gonna heal me, huh? "
" Twilight can. "
" Twilight is not coming. "
" What?! " They all startled.
I knelt to Twilight:
" Sorry, Twi, but you're still too weak for... what happened. I need you to stay here and rest, so you'll be ready to
" But I can still train. I can get stronger. I must! " She insisted.
" Sorry, my love, but I can't risk to stress you too much. Besides, you're already a good fighter by yourself. Go to
She closed the eyes, lowered the head and the ears, and reluctantly nodded.
After giving Fluttershy a healing know"how, I left her practicing with a little sprout and approached Pinkie and AJ.
" Alright, Pinkie, AJ, as you've never even focused, I'll explain how it's done. First, imagine you're gathering energy
" What's a solar plexus? " Asked Pinkie.
" It's... the intersection between the chest and the abdomen. " I pointed to the place on myself.
" An intersection? But if I don't see any... " She looked at her torso, without understand.
I looked upside, and then I came out with something:
" It's where your cupcakes go when you eat them. "
Pinkie stared at me, surprised, and then, she smiled:
" Now you're talking, hooman! "
" Alright, once you do that, imagine that all that energy goes from there through your chest, shoulders and forelegs,
Pinkie and AJ kept a while looking to their hooves. I looked down. Damn, this is gonna take a while! Maybe I should
" I think I got it! I think I got it! " Happily exclaimed Pinkie.
" You did? Well, do you remember what I explained to Dashie about creating an energy ball...? "
" Yes! The "Hadou"! "
" Did you remembered that? "
" Of course I do! I remember everything! I even remember everypony's name in Ponyville! My memory is flawless! "
" Alllright... see that boulder over there? Cast the "Hadou"ken" to it. " I pointed a big stone.
" What? No! I was raised in a rock farm. I'll never ever attack a rock. Period. " She turned the head and closed the
I twisted the eyes, upset, but then I came out with an idea. I took a small black crayon, went to the boulder and
" What about now? I bet it'll be easier now, doesn't? "
Pinkie stared for a moment to my "Masterpiece", and then frowned and clenched the teeth:
" Youuuuuuuuu bet... Hadou"ken! "
A second later, the boulder wasn't more but a dust cloud with falling debris:
" Bravo Pinkie! But I think you overdo it a bit there... "
" I don't! "
" Whatever... "
I officially named Pinkie as AJ's monitor, so she could taught the cowboy mare how it's done, and returned to
" Any progress, Flutters? "
" No... I'm so stupid and useless. " She sobbed.
" Huh"huhhh. Not at all. " I denied with my finger, and picked up Rarity, who was making figures with the trees branches.
Then, I returned to AJ:
" Buckin's, pardner. No matter ha many times ah try this, ah can't make a buckin' ball. Maybe this's nat fer me. " She
I thought for a moment, and then I picked a rock and put it over a stump:
" Alright, AJ. Now, focus and buck the rock. "
AJ looked at me with distrust, but she turned to the rock and bucked it.
The rock dissapeared in the sky.
" Well done AJ! I know you have it on you! " I cheered her, who can't still believe it.
" No, Spike. I'm not leaving you, Spike. " Was saying Twilight while sleeping. " Spike! " She woke up with a startle,
Then, she galloped to me:
" Gus, Gus, my love! I've completely forgotten about Spike! We have to return to Ponyville! I need to take him out of
" Sorry, my love, but you can't go back there. Those things could be still there and you'll get killed! " I warned her.
" But I can't leave him there, alone! And I'll go there with or without you! "
" Ah, no, you little crazy, I can't allow that! " I put my fists on my waist, upset.
" Try me! " She shouts and teleported away.
But I had her locked on. So, I quickly passed and ambushed her, and when she was going to pass for my position, I, with
" Release me! Release me! Let me go! " I brought her back protesting, and tied her to a tree:
" There you're gonna stay until we retrieve the Elements, Twi! " I told her.
" Gus! You can't tie me like I was an animal! Let me go! "
" You're an animal! " I roared, enraged.
She stopped rambling, and kept staring at me, with tearful eyes:
" Then... That's how you see me...? As an... animaaal...? " She cried.
I quickly understood my mistake:
" No, my love, no. That's not what I meant. " I hugged her.
" Then... why you don't let me goooooo...? " She sobbed.
" You know why, Twi. Don't make this worse than already is. "
" Gus, if you don't let me go, we're done. You hear me?! Done!! " She pushed me away, angry.
I stood up furious, with fists in my waist. So, she's trying to blackmail me now?
" Well, fine then! " I shouted, upset.
" Fine! " She shouted back, upset too.
" Hmph! " We both turned our backs to each other, crossing arms and forelegs, respectively.
Then, I could see the rest of the mares, watching the scene. I twisted my eyes.
" Well, that's it. Training is over. Take a rest and we'll continue later. " I stated with an angry gesture and walked
Dashie came at my side:
" Hey, Gus, I'm not tired. I want to continue training! "
I twisted my eyes again. Well, what the hell...
" Alright, Dashie, I think you're gonna like this spells, they're called Lightfeet and Muscle Toner, and they allow you
When I had moved far enough, Twilight called Rarity:
" Psssst, Rar. Come over here, please. " She whispered.
" What's it, dear? "
" Rarity, please, let me go. I need to look for Spike. "
" But, Twilight, Gus is right. If you return there, you'll get killed! "
" Shhhh! Rar, lower the voice. Look, I'm going to be careful, they won't see me. Rarity, help me, please. " She put a
" Twilight, please, don't do that, you're going to make me cry. " Rarity sobbed.
Twilight only enhanced the expression.
" Pretty please? "
" Wahhhah! " Rarity made a short cry. " Oh, dear, you got me! Just promise me you'll be safe, alright? "
Dashie and me were practicing our shielding endurance, bumping to each other at max speed. But I couldn't stop thinking
Suddenly, I looked upside, and Dashie was the last thing I could see, before all blacked out.
" Gus, Gus! Please, answer me! I don't know what I'll do if you die! Answer me, please! " I could hear Dashie cry, as
" Wow, Dashie, I didn't know you had those feelings for me. " I smirked, teasing her so she could see I was fine.
Dashie startled, then she stood up on her hinderlegs and looked around, worried about something, and later she put her
" If you tell anypony what I've just said, I'll rip your ear off! " She whispered with clenched teeth, and later made a
" Whoa, whoa! Easy, girl! I got the point! " I chuckled, tilting the head, just in case.
Then, she helped me to stand up.
" What happened, Gus? Why did you take out the shield? "
" I didn't. I just... lost the focus. "
" And that happens very often? "
" No. Only when you're thinking in something else. "
" You're still worried for your argument with Twilight, are you? " Dashie figured out.
" Yeah. " I sadly nodded.
" Well, I'm just wondering, that she and you finally break up, there might be somepony... Not me, of course...! " She
" That's enough, Dashie. Cut it out. " I put my open palm before her and made a negative gesture with my arms.
" Ow... Don't tell anypony about that either... " She frowned.
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 14 : Point of Inflexion:
I was walking back to check Twilight, when I happened to meet Rarity. She was with her loin turned to me:
" Hey, Rarity. How's Fluttershy training going? "
She didn't answer, just straightened all her legs, mane and tail, and started to tremble, like if I had threatened
" Rarity, what's happening? " I asked, worried.
She turned around in a flash, with eyes wide opened, and stuttered:
" N"n"n"ooothing"g"g? "
I didn't pay attention and kept walking. Well, maybe that's Rarity just being Rarity, I guess.
But when I arrived to the tree where Twilight should be, I discovered why she was reacting like that: No trace of
" Damn it! " I cursed, picked up the ring and rushed back.
Rarity was panting, recovering from the jolt, when she saw me running after her!
She threw a scared yell, and started galloping away from me! But everytime she looked, I was getting closer and closer!
" Ahhhhhhhhh! " She screamed, and dropped to the ground, trembling, with her forelegs over her head. " No, please, no! "
But I just passed her around.
Rarity raised her head, surprised of being still alive, and fainted.
Twilight was already in Ponyville. Hiding between the buildings and debris, she could get near her library house,
" I've already told you that I don't know anything about Twilight, Spike! Now get lost! "
" You have to know! You have to know! You're her brother! How you're not going to know? " Spike insisted. " Why you
Twilight's joy was overwhelming: Spike and Shining Armor, they both were alive! She couldn't resist and carelessly
" Spike! Big brother! You're alive! You're alive! "
" Twilighttttttt! " Spike also yelled of joy and ran toward her " You didn't leave! I knew you won't abandon me! I knew
Shining Armor soon joined them.
" Twilight, little sister! I thought you were dead! You're alive! "
They still hugged and cried of joy a little longer, too happy to think on anything else.
Finally they broke the hug, and Twilight put Spike in her loin:
" Well, Spike, now I have to take you with me to the Everfree. Our friends should be worried sick for me by now."
" Wait. Your friends are with you at the Everfree? All of them? " Asked Shining Armor.
" Yes. Why...? Wait a sec. How did you escaped from the castle? " Twilight was suspicious.
" That's a long story, and we haven't time. We need to find them before Luna does! Quick, show me the way! " Her brother
" You're right! Come on, this way! " Twilight galloped back to our hideout, followed by Shining Armor...
When I got to Ponyville, there were already some ponies cautiously walking around. It seems there aren't any monsters
Meanwhile, Twilight had lead her brother to our hideout. But, fortunately, Pinkie Pie had other of her combos:
" Oh, no! We're going to be knocked out again! " She warned.
Shining Armor scowled: "Buckings, they discovered me!", he thought. So, he trapped them with his shielding spell.
Twilight stopped short:
" Brother! But what are you doing?! "
" Little sister, please, run. Run away. " Shining Armor closed his eyes.
" What?! Brother, let my friends out! "
" I can't. Luna has me. Please, little sister. Run away. Save yourself. Luna still thinks you're dead. Run away,
Twilight didn't move:
" Sorry, brother, but I'm not running away anymore! I'm going to fight back! Release my friends, please! Fight
" Twilight, Celestia is not dead! There's no need to avenge anypony! Run away, please! "
Twilight scowled:
" You'll say anything just to make me leave, isn't? Isn't?! "
Monster"like noises could be already heared.
" Please, Twilight! You haven't much time! Run before they get you! Do it for me, please! " Shining Armor pleads.
" I'm not going anywhere, brother. And if I have to die, so be it. " Twilight's determination was unbreakable.
" No, Twilight! Listen to your brother, please! You can't die, you can't! " Pleads Spike, frightened.
Shining Armor closed his eyes again, and dispelled the shield.
" You know that this is my death sentence, little sister. Make it worth. " He sadly concluded.
" ...then Spike, Twilight and her brother left to the Everfree Forest. " Applebloom was finishing her report to me.
I looked to the Everfree, scared, and rushed back:
" Thanks, girl! "
Not too far from where I was, I could spot a large army of aliens and predators, heading to the forest. Oh, no, pal!
So, I cast and Implosion Blast, and threw it against them, wiping out most of their rear guard. A part of the army
I put my hands toghether in front of my solar plexus and roared:
" Multi Hadou"ken! " And plenty of Hadou"kens come out from me, and I started to turn around as well, resulting in a
For the rest, I cast my Dispel Sword, and the Lightfeet and Muscle Toner spells, and I was unstoppable...
The rest of the monsters were rapidly approaching, but they got trapped inside Shining Armor's shield.
Suddenly, Luna appeared behind him, making him to shiver.
" Well, well. What do we have here? The prideful captain of my royal guard... " She started with a mild voice.
Then, she started to walk around him:
" I only can wonder why he'll do such thing. I mean. What could be more important than the very life of his marefriend?
Now Shining Armor was sweating.
" And where's she, by the way? Did she abandoned you too, like she do with Celestia? Ohhhh, typical from a little
Shining Armor looked at her with rage:
" If you were only half the loyal and brave she is, you'll be fighting her by yourself, and you weren't sending an army
" Ohhhh, you're offending me, captain. " Luna put a hoof in her chest. " You already know that I don't like to waste my
Shining Armor shook his head, annoyed.
" But, fear not, my brave captain, as I'm not going to kill you... yet! " She threw an evil laughter.
The mares were trying to escape, when they got surrounded by aliens and predators! Fluttershy, Spike and Rarity quickly
But the other mares were more than ready to fight!
The battle soon become big and ugly. Twilight using her former spells, while Dashie, AJ and Pinkie their new learned
The monsters tried to surround them ever more, but a rainbow blur, running in circles among the siegers, delivered a
Twilight fired her purple beams over the remaining attackers, while AJ bucked away the ones that get too close!
" Hadou"ken! " And Pinke took down a group that were hidden in the tree tops!
More monsters were coming, but Dashie cast a black cloud and turn it into a lightining machine"gun, taking all them
Other flying alien squadron were approaching, but another Pinkie Hadou"ken tossed them away, to not to return!
AJ were throwing her rope, lacing any nearby foe and kicking it againts the next that was coming behind, creating
Luna was watching all that, astounded. She doesn't counted with such resistance.
It looks like she has to get dirty again.
" Well, at least this's not going to be boring. " She smirked.
She looked around, among the mayhem, looking for a weak spot. Then she found it: The frightened mares and the baby
Finally, the last monster was defeated, and the fighter mares looked around, looking for more threats.
" Impressive. Truly impressive. " They turned around, just to see Luna holding Fluttershy, Rarity and Spike hostage.
" This's your chance! Take her down! Don't worry about me! " Fluttershy yelled.
" YOU SHUT UP!!! " Screams Luna. Then, she looks back to the others. " Well, what are you waiting for? "
The mares looked at her, angered.
" You're a bucker coward, Luna. Taking advantage of the weak and defenseless. Come on! Fight me if you dare! " Defied
" Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! " Luna evily laughed. " I don't need to fight you if I have them. Surrender now. I'll start
She couldn't get to the "o", as a blurry rainbow took her apart. Both mares rolled far away, and Luna summoned her
Now it was it. Speed vs Speed. Dashie cast the Lightfeet and Muscle Toner spells, and managed to dodge or stop the
Luna started to teleport, trying to get Dashie by surprise, but her sword just ricochet against the pegasi's shield.
Next thing, she has Dashie almost over her. The three swords clashed together, creating a rain on rainbow colored
They both engaged battle again, and Luna rolled back and threw an Expansion Wave.
There she stood, panting and with some cuts and bruises.
" That little bucker! " Then, she turned her head upside, and Dashie was approaching to her from above, ready to pierce
" I have you, you bucking worm! " The pegasi yelled.
Luna almost haven't time to teleport to safety, before Dashie stroke the ground, causing a rainbow colored explosion!
Twilight was getting ready to help her friend, when her heart hurt again.
" No! Not again... " She mourned, and fell to the ground.
" Twilight, what's happening to you?! " Pinkie got scared.
" My heart... hurts... " Twilight could barely say, panting.
" She's wounded! Quick, we must find Gus! He can heal her right away! " Pinkie carried her with AJ, and both rushed to
Meanwhile, Dashie's and Luna's battle had become aerial. Luna was teleporting, trying to catch Dashie from behind, but
" Ha! Nice try! You'll never catch me! " She mocked to the dark blue alicorn.
" How is this possible?! " Luna complaint.
Dashie just keep accelerating. If she continued like that, she'll make the Sonic Boom, which she could use to stun
" It's so close! " She thought aloud.
I spotted the battle, and quickly ran to it, when I saw Pinkie and AJ carrying Twilight and galloping toward me.
" Hurry up, Gus, she's badly wounded! " Said Pinkie, and then leaving Twi in front of me. " We're going back to help
I quickly started healing Twi's heart. Damn! I told her to rest!
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 15 : Death of a Buttlerfly:
And there it goes! Dashie finally perfomed the Sonic Boom! Then she looked back, expecting Luna to be falling by now,
" She ran away. Coward. "
Then, she spotted me, healing Twilight, and landed near me. I did a quick glance to her: She had several cuts and
" Oh, buckings! Is she going to be alright?! " She asked, pointing Twi with a hoof, scared.
" Yes. In two or three weeks. Damn! I told her not to get involved! " I cursed. " Where are the others? "
Dashie looked back.
" They were there... but I can't see them. "
I looked upside.
" It looks like that damned alicorn ran away. Bring the others here, this place is no longer safe. We have to move out."
" I'm on my way! " Dashie parted to find the other mares, but she returned a while later, when I had already ended the
" Gus, Gus! I can't find them! They're nowhere around! " She informed me, scared.
" What the...?! Damn! " I realized that Luna has ponynapped them all...
A pretty beaten Luna approached Seymour, and he couldn't help himself but to say:
" Whoa! What happened, my princess? Rough day? "
Luna walked toward him, and made the VR Googles appear.
" Oh, jo, jo, jo! Are you came back to your senses, my princess? It was time already! " Seymour got happy, thinking she
" Teach me how this thing works. "
" Huh? My Princess? I think... that's better that you lend it to me. I'm all an expert, you know? " Seymour pointed
" Huh, huh. Teach me. How this thing. Works. " Luna repeated, tilting her head, very angry.
" But my princess...? "
" AT ONCE!!! "
Seymour stood in front of the cage holding Applejack, PinkiePie, Rarity and Fluttershy.
" You know? This is exactly what I wanted to avoid: Revolting ponies. Because revolting ponies are dead ponies. So, I'm
All the mares gasped of fear.
" Roasted! " Another gasp, louder than the first.
" And eaten!! " Another gasp, even louder than the previous. " That'll make an example so nopony want to revolt
" I VOLUNTEER! " All of them startled when heard Fluttershy's voice. It wasn't because what she said, but the way she
" Flutters, no, Flutters...! " The other mares tried to protest.
" SHUT UP YOU ALL! " Fluttershy screams, looking at them with a scary look. Then, she looks to Seymour again.
" Ohh, the Element of Kindness. How convenient. " Mocked Seymour. " Alright, so be it. The execution will be tomorrow at
" No Flutters, no. Why you? " Rarity put her forelegs over her.
Fluttershy looks at Rarity:
" Rarity, you always bring wealthy clients to Ponyville, making it a prosperous and healthy town. "
After, she looks to Applejack:
" AJ, you have to take care of your little sister Applebloom. And who else will give us those tasty apples that only
Then, she looks at Pinkie Pie:
" Pinkie Pie, you're the one that gives joy and happiness to our town. Without you, it will be gray and sad, and
And, finally, she turned around, closed her eyes and lowered the head:
" I'm just an useless pegasi, who can't even fly... Please, let me be useful for this only, I couldn't take it if
" You're not coward, Flutters! " Yells Rarity, sobbing. " Please, let me take your place! "
" No! I'll take her place! " Bumps Pinkie.
" Nah way, ah ar' the one who will... " Started AJ.
" Enough! All of you, enough! " Screams Fluttershy. " I need all you to live! To live for me! For our relatives and
" That's not fair, Flutters. " Protests Pinkie Pie.
" Pinkie Promise! " Repeats Fluttershy.
All the mares sighs.
" We promise... Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. " They said with weariness...
I carried an unconscious Twilight to Zecora's house, and sat aside to Dashie.
" What are going to do now, Gus? We're the only ones left. " She inquired.
I really don't know what to do. I was out of ideas. Also, the fact that she just took the mares and didn't used them
" Gus? " Asked again Dashie, worried for my silent treatment.
I frowned.
" Dashie, do you happen to know why Seymour and Luna kept alive you all, when they first captured you? "
" Ah, sure I am. How could I forget that? To torturing and abusing of us. That was for! "
I lowered the head and clenched the teeth. That damned Seymour! I never thought he'll fell so low! Then, they'll surely
I stood up.
" Dashie, we're going to Canterlot Palace. We're going to finish this. "
" But how we're going to enter? There surely will be millions of monsters guarding the castle! "
I put my hand in my pocket and took out a magic book: Teleporting, my nemesis. But I have to learn it yes or yes.
" We will, Dashie, we will... " I affirmed.
First thing I did, was to get to my hideout near Zecora's house. There I had a stock of real weaponry, as the things
I picked a sniper rifle, an uzi submachine gun, some frag grenades and plenty of ammo. There can't be place for any
" Dashie, first thing what we have to do, is to neutralize Seymour's magic tool. I'll try to shoot him down first, but
" And how I cast that? "
" Well, first you have to learn how to magnet yourself. Start with this piece of iron, try it to get stick to your
" Hey! Where are you going? " She asked, concerned.
I didn't turn around:
" I have my own spell to learn. I'll be back... " And I left.
The nightfall happened without I even realize it, and I haven't learned the teleporting spell yet. How that was
Dashie came closer to me with a tired look:
" Gus, friend. I can't get that thing to stick to my hoof. I can't hold anymore, I need to rest, or I'm going to pass
I frowned. Seems that we both had the same issue.
" Alright, let's eat and rest a while. We're not going to get anything else done for today... "
The next morning, we were startled from our slumber for an angry and worried Twilight:
" Hey, you two! How can you be sleeping, while our friends are in danger?! Don't you have any shame?! And Dashie, I
Only then, I realized that Dashie had slept with me. I smiled.
" Ohhh. Buck oooooooooofff. " Dashie yawns, still sleepy.
" Ah! But we haven't broke up? I can sleep along who I want with! " I replied, putting a fake anger face.
" What?! Did you...? " Twilight's angry face become scared and tearful.
" What do you think, if you bucked me out?! " I continued teasing her.
Twilight started to cry and turned around to gallop away, but I catch her for the tail before she could and dragged her
" Come here, my love. How could you think I'm gonna give up so easy on you? Nothing happened! "
" Why, my love, whyyyy? Why you make me to suffer like thiiii"i"is? " She cried.
" Because I'm trying to protect you, my love! And sometimes that means doing things that we don't want to! "
She looked at me, panting, but by her expression, she looks like to had understand it.
" Sorry, my love. I let myself to act carelessly, and I put everypony in trouble. I even bucked you out. Can you forgive
" Of course I do. And now, you have to go back to rest, beacuse that little heart of you still is badly. " I petted her
" Oh, it's not. It's fine already, and ready to action! "
" What?! " I put my hand on her chest, and checked her vitals. All were normal. " How...? " I couldn't believe it.
" Ah! Zecora's healing potions! Seems she has some aces under her hoof! " Twilight smiled. " So, what's the plan? "
I looked at her, not understanding at first.
" To save our friends! "
" Ow! Right...! It's... you'll probably aren't gonna like it... is plain crazy... "
" That's Ok. Some pink mare taught me that a bit of crazyness it's not a bad thing. At all. "
We both smiled and kissed in the lips. When we broke the kiss, she told me:
" Ah! My love, I had a present for you! "
" A present? "
" Yeah. A reconciliation one. I made it last night. Take. "
She gave me an amulet, with our pictures inside, and it reads: "Loving you is magic, your Twi"
" Do you like it? " She smiled, a little worried I didn't.
" How I'm not gonna like it, my love? " I smiled, and we kissed again.
" Are you done? " Dashie complaint, upset. " We're getting late, you know? "
It was near noon already, and Fluttershy was being transported in a cart for all through Canterlot, so everypony could
All the ponies stared to that silently, too scared to reply. Luna looked upside, satisfied, as Shining Armor's shield
While watching this, Seymour got remorsed: Any other of the ponies wouldn't be any problem, but the lovely
" My Princess, don't you think this's a bit... excesive? I mean, I played my part scaring them and all that, but it's
" Ow, but my stallion! Aren't you telling me you're backing out? If we don't do this, we'll soon have a revolt, and
" Alright, you got your point, but... I don't want to do it. "
" Ah! How could you think I'll let my stallion to stain his beautiful hands with that filthy pleb blood! Of course not!
The unicorn startled:
" What?! No! I refuse! I won't do it! "
" Don't question me, Shinny. Remember Cadanceeeeee. " Luna threatened him.
Then, she threw a butcher's knife in front of him.
" Alright, Captain. It's time. Carry on with the execution. "
Some predators with drums started to beat them. Seymour stared at Luna:
" Damn. You're so perverse... "
Luna evily smirked:
" I thought that you liked me to be perverse... "
Shining Armor raised the knife with his magic, and came closer to Fluttershy.
" Please... forgive me... " He babbled.
Fluttershy smiled.
" Don't worry, my brave captain. I'm ready. " And she closed her eyes and stretched her neck, getting ready for the
Shining Armor raised a trembling knife...
That's what I saw from my watching spot from a nearby tower, where, Dashie, Twi and me, after silently reducting the
I moved the dial of my sniper rifle. I just wanna to hit Luna's head, where the VR Googles were. Looks like she's the
Suddenly, Seymour ran towards the execution pedestal. That bastard! He wants to do it by himself!
" No, dude, no! Don't do it, don't do it! " He screamed to Shining Armor, but I couldn't hear him.
I pulled the trigger...
All that Fluttershy could feel, was a strong hit on her loin. An unconceivable weight fell over her, and a sharp pain
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 16 : Final Countdown:
Luna stared at the bloody body of Seymour, frightened and shocked:
" No, my stallion! NOOOOOOO!!! " She galloped to him and put her forelegs on his body. " Please, my stallion! Answer me!
I reloaded my gun and pointed to her head, but suddenly a swarm of flying aliens took off, putting her out of my line
I quickly launched my Implosion Blast and get rid of most of the vanguard, unfortunately that's the type of spell that
" Dashie, this a good time for that EMP! " I shouted, keeping the fire.
" I'm trying my best! " She replied, focusing ever harder.
" I'll help you, Dashie! Concentrate! " Twilight enlightened her horn even more and Dashie got covered with rainbow"
" AHHHHHHRRRRGGGGGGG!! " Dashie screamed, and, just when all the swarm were over us, her EMP wave finally came out
The VR Googles in Luna's head fried up, and she didn't even notice.
The effort was simply too much, and Dashie passed out.
" Dashie! " Twilight frightened.
I put my hand in the pegasi:
" She's fine! Let's finish this! "
I stood up and pointed again my sniper rifle to Luna's head, who was still trembling and shocked upside Seymour's
" Now I got you, bitch! " I closed my eye to aim better.
But just before I could fire, Shining Armor and the guards, unaware that I was going to put an end to the matter,
I raised the gun and cursed. Well, anyway. She's fairly outnumbered. Then, I looked to Fluttershy: She was under
" Twi! Teleport Flutters here! I think she's hurt! "
Twilight tried to, but failed.
" I can't! That spell drained all my magic! "
" Damn! " I cursed, and cast my surfing board"shaped cloud and went down.
I removed the fatty corpse of my former friend from over Fluttershy, and put my hands on her body: Damn! Broken ribs!
I looked behind me:
" AHHHHHHHHHRRRRRGGGGGGG!!! " Roared Luna of pure rage, sweeping down anypony who came nearby her.
Damn. Maybe I had to interfere.
I focused on healing Flutters. Damn, her cardiac pulse is so low! Her blood pressure is under 100/60 and dropping down
Suddenly, an earthquake"like tremor almost made me to lose balance, and several pieces of debris and ponies started to
80/40...
40/20... Fluttershy's blood pressure continued to drop down.
I sadly watched Flutteshy. Her life was literally dripping between my fingers. What can I do? Totally despaired, as I
" Ahhhhhhhggggggg! " Fluttershy recovered conciousness with a long gasp!
" Yes, yes, Flutters! Keep it going! Keep it going! Breath! Breath! " I was so relieved!
I applied some more healing magic to her chest, and finally managed to patch her broken bones and damaged internal
She opened her beautiful blue eyes again, and smiled to me:
" I had this beautiful dream... a lovely stallion came to me... and kissed me... I was so happy... so bad it was only...
" Alright, Flutters, let's take you outa here. " I cast the cloud again and took her to where Twi and Dashie were.
Twilight's angry expression told me that she has seen what happened:
" How could you...? " She shook slowly her head and half closed an eye.
" Twi, I didn't know what else to do! "
" Don't call me Twi! We're done! You hear me?! Done! " She waved her hoof horizontally, to emphasize her affirmation.
Damn the darned damned darn...
But I haven't time to think on couple problems, as Luna was taking down the last guards. It seems that I'll have to
I went down again, and saw Shining Armor staggering, trying to hold Luna inside his shield:
" Captain! Evacuate the area, I'll take care of her! " I shouted to him.
" Why I should listen to you?! You're one of them! "
" I'm not! And your sister is up there! " I pointed to the tower top.
" Big brother! " Twilight called him, waving a hoof.
" Twilight! You're safe! " He happily exclaimed.
" Do what he says! He knows what he's doing! " She replied.
Shining Armor nodded, and galloped to evacuate everypony, leaving Luna temporally inside his shield, giving me some
" Twilight! What are you doing here?! You have no magic! " I quickly warned her.
" I don't care! We'll defeat her together...! "
" No, Twilight! She's gonna kill you! " I screamed, concerned. " Evacuate right now, or we're done! "
" You filthy ponynapper, how can you do this to me?! " She angrily replied.
" And I mean it! "
" But Gus... my love... " She sobbed.
" My love? If you just bucked me out. Don't you remember? " I opened the arms, smiling.
She smiled too, slowly shooking her head.
" I hate you. "
At that moment, Luna broke Shining Armor's shield, and teleported away.
" I'll be back alive. Pinkie promise. " I turned my head to Twi, smiling.
" You'll better. Or I'll kill you. " She replied, smiling too.
I smiled yet again, and teleported too...
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 17 : Every war has a Final Battle:
I appeared just behind Luna, and she stopped short. I pointed my sniper rifle to her, but she doesn't turned around
I took out my finger from the trigger:
" Luna, give up already! " I pressed her. " You lost! Surrender already! "
She doesn't turned around.
" How dare you...? " She trembled, without looking at me. " How dare you to put yourself at my level?! "
Then, she finally turned to me, covering herself with an energy field so powerful, that I thought I was gonna to be
" I AM AN ALICORN PRINCESS!!! I WILL NEVER SURRENDER TO A PLEB SCUM LIKE YOU!!! DIEEEEEEEEEEE!!! " She screamed with
One could expect that 1000 years of solitary confinement has rusted her fighting skills. But guess what? They don't!
We started to teleport and slash! Teleport and slash! Teleport and slash! The resonating wave from our clashes were
I had to get out!
I cast a Counter Fade spell, which caused all the glass shards to shine with a blinding light. The trick worked and
Nevertheless, Luna quickly recovered, and started to break the balcony's stone pillars and threw them to me, I managed
Then, she flew to the roof. Knowing that if I want to have a chance, I'll have to keep the initiative, thus I used my
I had to run until she run out of slates, and then I teleported and clashed again my sword against her's. Then, I could
We clashed our magickal weapons for a while, and then she went flying, and I after her, and fought in the sky, and just
I was busy on that tactic, when a chill crossed my nape: I just could look a second behind, but it was enough to get
Quickly, I cast my Implosion Blast, and used the reactive power to break the constraint and to escape just in time.
The moon fell over Luna, and exploded in 1000 pieces! Well, that wasn't too hard... Shit! Luna appeared just behind me,
After a while of running, I started to feel bumpy inside. Maybe I left a piece of my intestines around? So, I cast a
Luna finally destroyed my Decoy, and started to yell:
" COME ON, PLEB SCUM!!! YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T DEFEAT ME!!! I'M THE PRINCESS OF DARKNEEEEEEEEEEEEESS!!! "
Then, suddenly, everything turned black. Shit! I can't see a shit! I waved my sword, but finding nothing but
Ok, Gus, piece of idiot, you can't see, so you have to rely on the other senses! So, I closed my eyes, and focused:
An unbearably high"pitched scratching noise, like cristal being cut, but 1000 times worst, started to flood my ears! I
Just...
Perfect...
Now blind and deaf...
This is it...
That pony bitch is going to take me down...
I fell on my knees, panting, and cast a Mid Shielding Field on the ground, to buy some time. I couldn't hear a shit,
I took out the pendant Twi gave to me, where was our photos inside a heart each, and reads: "Loving you is magic.
I looked to my right, and could see Luna, who has standstill, surprised that I could cast a light inside her darkness
I cast a Lumen Beam over her, and even she managed to dodge it, I could see that the dark area has a border. If I
I stepped out the shield... And slipped to the ground! The ground has become slippery, like wet soap! Shit! How many
Anyway, I can't spend too much time in this, or she'll figure out, so I started to hit the ground with my heels,
I hit a wall so hard, that I lost almost all the air in my lungs. Instinctively, I clapped my hands before me, catching
" DIE, PLEB SCUM, DIEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! " I could hear even with the ear taps...
I put my boots over the sword, and sliced it to a side! The wall exploded, and we both went through it and fell
There we were, panting and filled with cuts, scratches and bruises, looking to each other.
I took back my fighting stance with my Dispel sword, as we were out at last of her darkness trap.
" Luna, give up already! This is pointless! Even if you kill me, you'll be left so hurt, that any other will be able to
Luna chuckled.
" You're so naive. Do you really believe I do care? I have enough with killing you! NOW DIEEEEEEEEE!!! " And she rushed
I rushed to her, screaming too. This is it. Is now or never. We both are in our limit. And only one will remain...
Our swords clashed one last time, and the expansive wave flew away all the debris and the leaves from the nearby trees,
" Let me go! " Cried Twilight, managing to escape from the hideout where everypony was, and galloped desperately where
" No, Twilight!! " Screamed Shining Armor, scared. " You have no magic! Come back, come baaaaaaaack!! "
" No! He can't be dead! He can't be dead! He can't...! " Twilight yelled, crying while galloping.
Luna's horn rolled at her side, but her bathered body still could move. She managed to stand up, but I took her for her
She still defiantly looked at me.
" What are you waiting for, pleb scum? Finish it already. You know I will never surrender to you. " She panted.
I looked back, and I saw a beautiful lavender mare happily galloping towards me. Then, I looked back to Luna, smirking.
" I know. But you will surrender to another little princess, don't you? "
Luna threw a despective bloody spit...
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
I had to answer to Celestia for everything that had happened. Luckily, with as good attorney as Twilight Sparkle, my
Funny thing is, that after all this ended, Twi and me ended breaking up again. She came out with some kind of
I'm accompanying Fluttershy to her picnics form about five months to now, as she invited me to one and said she's too
Dashie keeps training with me. Her dream to be part of the Wonderbolts has returned to her and she's becoming stronger
Something fun happens with Rarity. Sometimes she runs to me and starts to tell some annoying speech, or even bites or
I still haven't managed Pinkie Pie to organize any party for me. And the last one she did and I showed up unninvited,
Applejack is the only one that's still behaving more like the way I remember her to. I give thanks to the heavens that
And about Luna... well, it turns out that Celestia didn't banished her to the moon again. It looks like that losing her
And, here I am, six months after all this madness happened, and I have no mare yet. Maybe I should try Zecora again?
I stood up, shooking the dust from my raincoat, when a meekly voice sounded behind me:
" You know, Teddy Bear? That raincoat doesn't scare me anymore... "
GustaffInmortal
Author's Note
Note from the Author:
Well, my brony fellows, this is it: The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying.
I'm already working on the Book 2, and if I get enough votes, I'll upload it.
Long life and prosperous!
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying.
" FIGHT! "
I rushed toward my opponent, trying to surprise him and, therefore, break his fighting strategy. However, the man,
Then, I put a leg between his, and projected his full body to the ground, and thus performing a flawless judo ippon.
Without giving him time to recover, I quickly pushed against the ring's cords, and, taking advantage of the thrust,
This finally do, as my opponent fell facedown, and couldn't stand up after the count of ten.
" Woooooow! " I exclaimed along with my friend Seymour, the typical fatso nerdy genious.
Both raised our arms and took out our Virtual Reality googles, as in the TV screen in front of us we had all the
" Awesome, Gus!! You took down Dr. TakeDown, the tenth in the world ranking list! I can't believe it! "
" But believe it! At this pace, I'll soon be Number One! "
" Yeaaaaah! " We both celebrated at once.
I put the VR googles on the table and stepped out from the VR rack.
" Are you leaving already, buddy? " Seymour grabbed my jacket.
" Yeah, pal. It's late and I'm hungry. "
" But you haven't seen my latest improvements in VR yet! "
I made an annoyed gesture. Seymour and his crazy inventions.
" Yes, like the one that almost fried my balls? "
" No, buddy, no! I promise this is safe, and you'll like it! Put the googles on! Come on, come on! "
I did so, and Seymour transformed into Darth Vader.
" Come and fight, Luke Skywalker! " He parodied, yielding his harmless lightsaber through my body. I took out the VR
" Watch this guns, you punk! " He stretched his virtual biceps. Even the voice changed.
" All right, all right. I must confess that's cool. " I approved.
" See? " He took out the googles, smiling. " And also, I know exactly how we can celebrate your victory. " Commented my
" What? Are you going to celebrate my victory with a plastic suppository? " I smirked.
" Are you sure you don't wanna it? " He replied. " Of course not. Because, this, is the paradise, the nirvana, a dream
" What, photos of your naked mom? "
" Ha! You wish. " He was so deep in his monologue that he didn't get the sarcarm, or ignored it: " This... is the adult
I slighty smiled. Adult MLP in VR? Well... it not was exactly a dream come true, maybe half a dream, or maybe one
" Hey! " Seymour took me out from my thoughts. " Wanna try it out? It's a beta version, and the AI algorithm sucks. But
" All right, all right! " I agreed reluctantly.
Seymour copied the USB content to the two VR googles and we stepped back to the VR rack.
" OK! Ready or not, here we go! " He announced, like some kind of sport commentator.
I then put the VR googles on, and a bunch of trees appeared in front of me.
" Heh. The Everfree Forest, I presume? " I smirked.
" Yep. Isn't cool, huh? "
" Yeah. Hey, buddy. Why almost all the MLP FiM fanfics starts in the Everfree? "
" Hell I know. Some kind of clichee, I suppose. "
I extended my hand, and I could touch the tree's bark. It was so incredibly real, like it was really there.
" Hey, Seymour! Your VR gloves are a kick on the head! " I couldn't do nothing but became astonished.
" Sure they are! Just wait when they'll get supported by the simulator! Come on, Ponyville is this way! "
" Right... " I smiled, but then... wait... did he mean that... the VR gloves aren't turned on?! Then, why I can touch the
I slowly brought my hand near the googles, and put then off at the same speed: The tree was still there. I gulped and
Author's Note
Starting Date: 1. 9. 2019
Finishing Date: 31. 9. 2019
I'm not a native English speaker, so I do apologize before hand if the flaws in the translation do affects the
This is my very first contribution to the blog, so, feel free to comment and/or add constructive/destructive
The Equestrian Monomyth - Book 1 - Be a Good Brony or Die Trying
Chapter 4 : Spoiled friendly first contact:
Zecora returned almost empty hoofed:
I'm sorry, I'm sorry my hero for my fail,
Now you'll surely believe I'm useless,
No, no, no, no, Zecora, don't worry. I don't think none of that. Besides, between Seymour and me, we recolected enough
Ow...! -
By the way, Zecora, what happened? -
Oh, the usual. Everypony locked up on their houses,
I see... So, it's probably that those ponies will come here for an antidote. -
Yes, I presume it will be if they are smart,
All right. Look, don't tell them we're here. I don't want the panic got loose. Also, if there are any unicorn, ask
We had our lunch, and later, I told Zecora:
Well, now Seymour and me are gonna check that the woods are safe to walk on, alright? -
She nodded in agreement.
I smirked, while thinking: -( Cool. Massacre time again. Oh, yeah! )-
The next day, exact like an english gentleman, the ponies arrived to Zecora's house. Seymour and I watched all the
After they left, we returned to Zecora's place.
Well, Zecora. Some of the unicorns agreed to borrow you the magic books? - I inquired.
Oh, yes, yes! The lavender one, Twilight Sparkle, has a collection,
Satisfied, I turned to Seymour:
Well, buddy, it seems that we have some free time now. Can you spend a walk around? I have something important to
Yeah, yeah. - Said Seymour with a disgusted tone and walked
Zecora returned almost empty hoofed:
" I'm sorry, I'm sorry my hero for my fail,
" No, no, no, no, Zecora, don't worry. I don't think none of that. Besides, between Seymour and me, we recolected enough
" Ow...! "
" By the way, Zecora, what happened? "
" Oh, the usual. Everypony locked up on their houses,
" I see... So, it's probably that those ponies will come here for an antidote. "
" Yes, I presume it will be if they are smart,
" All right. Look, don't tell them we're here. I don't want the panic got loose. Also, if there are any unicorn, ask
We had our lunch, and later, I told Zecora:
" Well, now Seymour and me are gonna check that the woods are safe to walk on, alright? "
She nodded in agreement.
I smirked, while thinking: "( Cool. Massacre time again. Oh, yeah! )"
The next day, exact like an english gentleman, the ponies arrived to Zecora's house. Seymour and I watched all the
After they left, we returned to Zecora's place.
" Well, Zecora. Some of the unicorns agreed to borrow you the magic books? " I inquired.
" Oh, yes, yes! The lavender one, Twilight Sparkle, has a collection,
Satisfied, I turned to Seymour:
" Well, buddy, it seems that we have some free time now. Can you spend a walk around? I have something important to
" Yeah, yeah. " Said Seymour with a disgusted tone and walked away.
Some weeks later, I was studying Twilight's books outside Zecora's house, as Twilight came earlier and we had to hide.
I looked to Zecora. Her sight was lost somewhere on the window. Yep, I had to tell her that I only wanted her as a
At that moment, I heard multiple musical instruments at once from my Early Detection System, or EDS. I installed it so
" Geez, that's Pinkie Pie leading the parasprites out of town. But I can't let that vermin ruin off our cover. " So, I
" Huh, what? "
" It's the parasprites' episode. We have to wipe them off. We'll wait until Pinkie Pie leaves and we'll get to work. "
" And you woke me just for that? If I could recall well, Pinke Pie managed to get rid of all them just by herself. She
" Come on! Did you buy that? That the parasprites will just FUSH...?! And vanished in the air?! " I swung my arms to
He stared me with a angry look, then his eyes twisted up, his expression transformed like a chamaleon, and a happy
" So, are you in? " I pointed back to me with my thumb, happy to see him agreed.
" No! " He got back to his angered face, and turned in his hammock, giving his back to me.
Argh! Damned Seymour! Who understands him? I guess I had to take care of the trouble all by myself. Well, time to test
I used my VR googles to cast two low power phaser pistols, and ran to the music's direction.
After a while of following Pinkie at a safer distance, I sighed of relief when she finally stopped playing and started
Shots, shots and more shots, and the parasprite's number started to quickly diminish! More shots, now using my Locking
I fell clumsily on my back, but I couldn't stop laughing and shooting. Well, Muscle Toner spell! I leaped up like a
I stepped back to our hiding spot, finding Seymour's hammock empty. Well, maybe he left to shit, thing which he does
Then, Seymour appeared. He looks nervous and were shaking:
" Gus, Gus, buddy! Thank goodness you came back already! "
" Seymour, dude... What happened? " I asked, starting to worry.
" Man, you have to help me, I'm in deep shit here! "
Come on! He shits on his pants and now he needs me to clean his butt, or what?
" What did you do now, you idiot?! "
" Come, come here and you'll see! "
I followed him to a nearby hideout we had recently built, and showed me a moving sack.
" Mmmmmmphhh! " Could be heared from the sack.
I cautiosly approached to the sack and opened it a bit, but it was enough to see Pinkie's violet mane. I tightened it
" You kidnapped Pinkie, you idiot?! Are you nuts?! " I scolded him below my breath.
" What's the big deal, dude?! " He replied aloud. " If you slaughtered all those animals just for bumfffttt?! "
With the speed of a lightning, I tapped his mouth with my hand, but it was too late, as I could see the sack start to
" What were you thinking, you piece of shit?! " I grabbed him for his shirt and shook him violently. " I told you to
" But dude, I had a plan! "
" Yeah?! Ha! Go ahead, let me hear it! " I told him with rage, letting him off.
" Man, you know that in all these fanfics, the character has to wait one or two years before making a move. I don't
" Ha! And I presume that you've found a shortcut, didn't you? "
" Yes, I did! " Seymour adopted a pose like he had earned a Nobel prize. " Since Zecora fell in love with you because
" Wow... heh heh... that's... " I smiled and swung my finger to him. " That's the brightest and most ass kicker plan I
" Then you like it? " Seymour smiled too, filling himself with hope.
" OF COURSE NOT, YOU IDIOT!!! THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!!! " I screamed of pure rage, forgetting for a moment that Pinkie
" Then what we're gonna do?! We can't have her there forever! "
" I know, I know! " I turned around, rubbing the back of my head. " Just let me think, will you? "
" You could torture her until she breaks and... "
" Seymour, if you say a single word more... a single one... " I turned around and threatened him, gripping my fist.
But then... I froze in place, as I could see Zecora trotting toward us.
" Buddy, this is becoming worse every minute... " Seymour whispered, all pale and sweating.
" Hey, what's happening?
" No. "
" Yes. "
" No! I mean... " I stared to Seymour with a murderous look. " Seymour was complaining because... he said that your soup
" That's true? I'm so bad? I'm making you ill?!
Zecora turned around and galloped back to her house, crying in a way that broke my heart.
" Whoa, that was clo... . " Started to say Seymour, but I punched his lights out. " Argh! Shit, dude! That hurts! "
I didn't say anything else, and walked back to the hideout. I'll had to somehow convince Pinkie that everything was
Just...
Perfect...
