Billybob the Butt Bandit: a name feared and respected by many. Through his many journeys and quests in the old west, he has stolen hearts and bombarded many bodacious booties. Now, he must journey to the magical land of Equestria through a conveniently placed portal to save the land and his sidekick, Larry the Lubricant. Little does Billybob know, however, that King Sombrero, the dastardly Mexican Crystal King, seeks revenge on the ponies who ended his reign, and with his army of Ass Ninjas, Billybob may never find that which he seeks.

The Adventures of Billybob the Butt Bandit™ will leave you so astounded, so brain dead, and so viciously aroused, that no mere masturbatory technique known by mortal man will quench your carnal desires.

(Not to be taken in the smallest amount of seriousness. This fic, though it may promise to due so, does not treat or eliminate terminal diseases, acne, social awkwardness, euphoria or blunt-force trauma)