Chapters

A VERY MERRY UNIVERSAL MAGIC CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 1
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 2
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 2
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 1
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 2
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 1
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 2
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 1
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 2
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 1
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 2
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 7A: The Neon Less Trotten:
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 7B: Death of a Sales Neon:
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 8A: Big Neon Walking:
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 8B: The Neon Effect
My Little Forest
Cupcakes
Fire Factory
My Little Pony: Universal Magic: The Lost Episode
TF's POV
Lawman's Origins (Working Title)
The Universal Halloween Spook-Tacular Magic Special
Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 1
A Nice Little Bedtime Story For Kids

A VERY MERRY UNIVERSAL MAGIC CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

A VERY MERRY UNIVERSAL MAGIC CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

Character Commentary Coming Soon

A VERY MERRY UNIVERSAL MAGIC CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

Well hi there y'all…it’s me again…back for another fucking special……………….ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH… Another fucking special god damn it. I knew I should have canceled that contract when I had the chance…but nooooooooo…my agent said I had to do this special…it’ll get me exposure….exposure my fucking ass.

Well it’s that time of year again I suppose. Time to write down what happened…as from the point of time of me writing this in my good ol’ journal, Christmas is already over. But I guess I have to tell you all a tale as to what happened. Well…I'll tell you…just give a moment to allow me to mix some egg nog and vodka. That’s a pretty god mix…right? Hold on…just give a minute………..almost got it there….there…I have my drink, now let’s do this shit. So where do I begin?

Well, I suppose I should explain that like how the Halloween special happened and everything is fine. Like I said to the other guys, by the next special, everyone would be back alive. And everyone was since the time Mac unleashed that green goblin guy and almost destroyed Stalia…and probably all of Equestria.

But we all know Stalia is the most important part here. The only thing that needs to be said is that just like Halloween, Christmas is the same thing here in this universe. It’s not called Hearth’s Warming Eve, just Christmas. And there was apparently a Pony Jesus and Pony Santa as well.

Let me explain how this works…So many…many…many years ago…was a stallion…named Jesus. When was he born? Where was he born? Was it during Christmas time? Was it during the springtime? Did he make wood? Did he do steroids and crack cocaine to get his magical powers? What’s a Jesus? No one knows.

All anypony knows is that he was once real, but his life is more or less of a legend. He was a god pony and was one of the earliest ponies to spread harmony upon to others as the concept of being nice to one another wasn’t invented until this so called Jesus thing happened. And once Jesus opened the minds of many, they were all blown away and praised him for how magical he was, and when I mean magical, I mean, he did the card trick thing. But then there was a pony that wasn’t happy that someone was trying to be nice to others and do the fancy card trick thing.

This one pony wanted everyone to be miserable and never let anyone have any fun...or see the amazing card trick. Some say he wasn’t even a pony at all and he was a zebra…or at least that’s what the local hobo says anyways in Stalia. And some say he was just the local school's principle... But regardless of who he was, he was not happy and so, legend has it, he went to space and fought some space demons and came back with a magical amulet that automatically nailed this Pony Jesus to the cross while dark clouds passed by.

And when I mean by dark clouds, the legend literally just says it was dark clouds. No rain or lightning…just dark clouds randomly appeared out of nowhere. Not even a sentence about god farting out of his ass. And then…Pony Jesus died and everyone was very sad by this all except for that one pony that killed him. But instead of the other ponies taking their revenge and kill the one that killed Pony Jesus, they instead just banned him from their lands and forced him to live in Pony Mexico…the worst possible place right next to Canada…good thing that doesn’t exist here though.

And so the ponies wrapped up Pony Jesus' dead body in used toilet paper and was about to bury him, but then they realized they were too lazy to bury him so they just went ahead and put him in a cave instead until they felt like burying the dead body. And then three days came by and Pony Jesus rose from the dead, and Pony Jesus walked outside to thank the ponies for keeping him nice and warm and giving his body a place to stay while he was dead.

And legend has it that he went to heaven as well and was about to speak of the good word about god and such…but once everyone else saw that Pony Jesus was alive, they automatically thought he was a zombie so they killed him. And now, every Christmas, some pony in their mid forties that is on drugs and has a doucebag looking beard goes outside and dresses up as Pony Jesus to remind everyone of this great stallion that once lived…that and earn minimum wage. Hey, a pony has to put food on the table you know?

But what about Santa Pony? What does he have to do with all of this Christmas mess? And How did Christmas came to be in this universe? Well if you sit down and go easy on the OJ Simpson…I’ll tell you. Well it all started sometime after Pony Jesus' death. Somehow, somewhere, there was a pony living in the northern part of the world that got word of Pony Jesus' existence. And legend has it that this pony heard of all the good will that Pony Jesus did, and so as a pony that was living in the north part of the world, he decided that he needed to do the right thing.

What was that right you may ask? Well, it’s obvious…isn’t it? He went down to South America Pont Land and captured a bunch of Pony Midgets and forced them to build a little factory and forced them to make toys for boys and girls so he may give them to the kids out of his own heart. But then one day, there was a Wiivolution that broke out amongst the Pony Midgets and they tried to revolt against the evil Pony Santa, however Pony Santa had a trick up his sleeves for he had a banana.

And as soon as he threw the banana on the ground, many Zebras came to his aid and helped control the Pony Midgets. And so, Pony Santa has an army of Zebras, super zebras to be exact, to keep the Pony Midgets in check as the super zebras whip them all day, every day to work until they die. But don’t worry, the population of the Pony Midgets will not go extinct as the Super Zebras make sure to force breed the Pony Midgets as well, as well as breed with their females. And as all this happens, Pony Santa stays in his office, smokes a cigar and overlooks the whole entire process.

What does he get out of this? Nothing. Then why do It you may ask? Well he was some old fat guy stallion that happened to find the fountain of youth somewhere up in the mountains towards the north and he had nothing else better to do with his time other than to become a disciple of Pony Jesus. Yeah...that’s right…Pony Jesus is still involved. And apparently he can come in contact with wherever Pony Jesus' spirit is living at and talk to them. And together, they make Christmas possible.

At least that’s how the legend goes that is. Anything else is more or less is fake news don’t you know? But as to how everyone else got to know of this legend known as Pony Santa, no one really knows actually, so I don’t have an answer for that one. However, legend has it that Pony Santa was forcing the Super Zebras to perform unethical science experiments on the weak Pony Midgets, and legend has it that he found a way to become a quantum being. How you may ask? Don’t look at me, I don’t know anything about Quantum Mechanics? That’s just how the story goes.

But…apparently since he is a quantum living being, it basically gives him super powers. But that's just the legend. But the real question is though…does this story get passed around from generation to generation, from boy to girl all across Equestria and maybe even the entire world? Hell no…this all sounds way too ridiculous and most of the ponies that I’ve seen and heard from don’t even know this legend. Well…all except for Stalia..of course. Stalia seems to keep the tradition alive it seems to keep the original tale intact while every other pony in Equestria seems to have moved on and made a more family, friendly version. With Pony Jesus, the tale goes that he was a pony with magical powers that may or may not have a connection with god.

And Pony Santa, depending on who you ask, was a creative way to market products for the holidays or he was a fat stallion that had diabetes that was generous enough to go out and deliver presents to all the good boys and girls all around the world. And as far as I can tell, that’s the story that Twilight and her friends roll with as I’ve been told this. But here in Stalia, as I said, the old tale is the one that gets passed around.

And as far as I am aware, it’s the only place that still has the old tale alive and well. I suppose that’s how Stalia is, traditional in spirit, and it shows as it sticks out like a sore thumb amongst the rest of Equestria. The only thing though is that no one here, even in Stalia, is for sure if these tales are true. Some say it’s a myth while others say it's true. You know what I believe? Nothing. I honestly give up, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it did exist. And if it did…it better stay far away from the fucking Christmas specials…because my contract says I have to do seven of these god damn forsaken specials, seven each for Halloween and seven for Christmas, and I can already tell where the next special might go.

I swear, if the writers and producers of this Christmas special plans on pulling this shit on me, there’s going to be hell to pay, lawyers are going to be shoved straight up their fucking asses, and I’m sending them a GOD DAMN in-voice. Anyways, that’s the whole back story for all that you need to know. So how about we get this special started...shall we? Now where do we begin? With me?

Nooooooooooo…that’s not in the script, thank god, instead…let’s start off with someone that you wouldn’t expect…Forrest. Yup, that beautiful, red bastard. Well, he’s not even a bastard. He’s just a big ol’ wussy. But at the end of the day…does it really matter? In fact…it doesn’t matter if you’re a dick or a pussy…what matters at the end of the day…you’re all assholes in one form or another. Well aside from that, let’s get started shall we…before the producers come on to the set and start fucking with the program.

So we start in Stalia, but not on the ground, but rather in the sky. I know, we’re setting the bar pretty high aren’t we? The production budget has increased by five bucks in recent months. It opens a whole new world of opportunity for the show. So anyways, we’re in the sky, but not just anywhere in the sky with some random, dirty, whore filled clouds. No…instead…we’re in Forrest's shitty excuse for a home.

Basically saying we're starting off with Forrest’s cloud home. Now as a fresh reminder as to what Forrest’s home is like, it’s lingering above Stalia. Although not over the entire town, of course. Rather it’s lingering over the opens fields of grass and the hills that roam the landscape that surrounds Stalia. And of course it’s high enough in the sky to be on level with Cloud City, Stalia’s equivalent to Cloudsdale. And with that being said, we start at Forrest’s home. His house you might call it. It's about roughly two stories high, made out entirely of clouds with a hint of non-cloud related material as well. There’s even a little stream of water pouring out on the side of Forrest’s home as well, just like Rainbow Dash’s home, but instead the color of rainbows, it’s the color of fire.

And I do believe at one point Forrest wanted to make it actual fire but he was too much of a pussy to be a stallion and use actual fire in fear that it’ll scare Rainbow Dash away. Because you know…the whole...stalking thing. But anyways, everything looks modern from the inside and outside. It’s rather nice to say the least, almost as if Forrest was raking in the money…but he wasn’t…because he had a second mortgage on his home and could barely pay rent. Hell, he even owed money to a couple of loan sharks…literally…sharks that hands out loans.

They are magical sharks that Forrest summoned from the sixth dimension and then loaned him some money, with his legs being collateral, and last time I heard, Forrest has about three months before the loan sharks comes back from the sixth dimension with lead iron pipes and ready to break his legs. Of course, you might be asking how do they get money from Forrest that way? They don’t! They instead just get the pure enjoyment of beating the everlasting shit out of some poor innocent creature that happens to be in debt and is in need of some assistance.

So Forrest is fucked…unless he declares bankruptcy…but even then he can’t because he even owes some hobos some money…even Dead Hobo Body…and I can’t believe he’s owing money to him. I hear Dead Hobo Body comes out at night, standing outside of Forrest’s home, waiting for him to come out with his metal bat to bash his skull in. But it’s Christmas time so Dead Hobo Body is off for the holidays, so Forrest is safe…for now. But anyways, Forrest is kind of broke as he lives on his paycheck that he gets from working at the factory…that is literally called the factory.

What do they make there? No one knows, but all that smoke coming from the smoke stacks must be something important. So anyways, Forrest is inside his home, on the first floor in his living room in a way. Everything is pretty much is made out of clouds, although there is some slight color differences surprisingly, but for the most part, it’s just clouds. But it’s that good kind of clouds where you can use it for a very specific purpose to fuck it. It’s a two for one kind of deal, the best kind of deal. There’s also a fireplace that has some wood that has not been lit from what the looks of it: Never.

However, if I had to guess, Forrest is just waiting to fuel the flames of his fireplace whenever a poor child can’t pass some sort of test, but hey, that’s just me getting drunk right now because…the fucking…Christmas special son of a bitch. Anyways, and right behind Forrest is the stairs to go up to the second floor, which mostly comprises of his bedroom and an attic that not even Forrest knows what goes up in there. But yet, he doesn’t have a basement, what pity I say, and what shame too.

What would Forrest do if there ever happened to be a cloud tornado ripping through Cloud City? Probably fucked. But aside from that, I should also mention that the staircase is one of those fancy spiral stair cases where it kind of goes at a circular angle as you go upwards. Not in a tight circle, like a lighthouse, but like if it was a mansion of some kind that is generous on the space that was there to spare. And with that in mind, the kitchen and dining area was somewhere off that cannot be seen by a simple guest and blah blah blah, let’s move on with this shit. So Forrest is sitting on his couch, a couch that looks like it was made for three to sit on. He is sitting comfortable on the couch, which all of his body is on the couch cushions and such. Forrest is sitting on the couch like how sometimes other ponies sit…like a weird puppy dog, even though it doesn’t feel like that shouldn’t be possible but yet is somehow.

So anyway, Forrest is sitting on his couch with a big, warm smile on his face, almost as if there was nothing to bother him in his own mind and the like. If anything, it looked like Forrest was fine and contempt with himself and with the life that he has made despite all the shit that life has thrown his way. He seems not to be bothered by the fact that we’ve already started another Christmas special, but rather, he seems to be in his happy place, calm and comfortable. And that’s the thing with Forrest, no matter what life throws his way, he always seems to be happy with it no matter what in the end, even if life is holding a knife to his dick and threatening to chop it off to appear a scootaloo, he still manages to be happy one way or another in the end.

And since it was Christmas time, it almost seems like nothing can shoot Forrest’s happiness down. But Forrest wasn’t just alone by himself, even though most of the time he was. Oh no, instead, he had a very special guest over, the Hitler Nugget. Yup, that guy’s back, and who would have thought too, and so soon as well. Although the weird thing was though we couldn't find the Hitler Nugget anyway when it came to filming on set, so we just got a stand in for him.

Well, the Hitler Nugget wasn’t there to cause any trouble or harm towards Forrest. No, instead he was there as his friend, because...you know…the last special…the Halloween special. Anyways, the Hitler Nugget was sitting in a chair made for one. The Hitler Nugget was sort of small for it so it looked huge compared to him as well in the Hitler Nugget’s eyes. But even if you were to look into the Hitler Nugget’s eyes at that very moment, you wouldn’t have any kind of hatred towards the juice or plans of world domination. No, instead, you could see that the Hitler Nugget too was happy and contempt with himself and was enjoying his time that he was having with Forrest.

The Hitler Nugget even had a nice, little, warm smile across his face along with his little Hitler Mustache. He was also holding a mug, a mug that looked like he had brought it himself because I’m sure in the Hitler Nugget’s case, he would be considered disabled because….well you know, he’s a living, breathing chicken nugget that looks like it came from McDonalds so he does not have any human organs but yet can still do human things.

In this special’s case, we call that personification, and all I have to say is they are not paying me enough to do this shit. Anyways, the Hitler Nugget was holding a mug, filed hot and tasty coco that Forrest had made for him. But of course, you must be wondering why The Hitler Nugget is at Forrest’s place or why he is even part of the story at all. Well to tell you the truth, it’s because the stand n that we got for the Hitler Nugget tried to back out of this special, but his contract states if he doesn’t work, then the studio can torture him until he dies a slow and painful death as well as kill his wife and children. But I’m not legally obligated to give the details of that said contract, or else the studio heads are going to send a hitman after me and replace me with a guy named Larry that they found working at a Starbucks.

I would let him have it, but according to my contract, if I do, then he also is allowed to saw of my face with a specific, rusty saw from the 1800’s and wear it to pretend that it’s me and to try and fool the audience that nothing has changed or worrisome from behind the scenes. In which case there is, but let’s not get into that, let’s continue on because right now, someone from the studio is putting a gun to my head because they now realized that I was stalling this entire time in hope that help will come.

Help me. So the show must go on. So the Hitler Nugget was at Forrest's house and as the Hitler Nugget was sipping on some hot coca, Forrest was just having a smile on his face and said to The Hitler Nugget, “And so that’s why you want to gas the Juice Hitler Nugget?”

The Hitler Nugget said with a still warm smile on his face, as if the conversation was normal to have, “Why yes, yes it is why. They must not get away with what they have done to me and the others. The Juice must pay for their crimes. And so ever since that day when I turned 5 years old, I made it my duty to bring Justice to Jones and his family. I mean the nerve of these juices, thinking they could go up to them and do that to them? WELL I AM NOT HAVING IT GOD DAMN IT! I WILL HUNT ALL THE JUICES UNTI THEY ARE ERADICATED FROM THIS WORLD, EVEN IF IT IS THE LAST THING THAT I DO! DIE JONES WERDEN RÜCKGESETZT!!!”

As the Hitler Nugget was yelling and screaming to the top of his lungs, the Hitler Nugget all of a sudden had his face turn from happy and warm to angry and sour. And as he yelled to the heavens from his vocal cords, the Hitler Nugget raised both of his arms up high in the air and made fists with them and shook them like he was angry at god or something like that.

But once after he was done yelling, he looked back towards Forrest with a calm look once again and said to Forrest, “Sorry about that.”

Forest then said with a welcoming look on his face that looked like it was understandable and contempt and said to the Hitler Nugget, “ It’s fine Hitler Nugget. We’re friends after all, and friends talk to each other and their problems when they need to let it out. And if possible, friends help out friends get through their problems.”

The Hitler Nugget then said, “Yeah, you’re right! Thanks for teaching me Forrest about the magic of friendship.”

Forrest then said as he closed his eyes and had an even bigger smile on his face, “No problem at all there Hitler.”

And as Forrest was done speaking, Forrest's eyes opened once more.

And so the Hitler Nugget then asked Forrest, “But what should I do about the juices then Forrest? Should I still go out and gas them like how Jones would have wanted or should I let their reign of terror continue to go on as everyone else suffers their wrath with no mercy and no end in sight?”

Forrest then paused for a moment and no longer had a smile as it felt like to him that the conversation that he was having with Hitler Nugget was starting to turn into an awkward one.

So Forrest stared at the Hitler Nugget and raised one eye brow up and said, “Ummmm…I don’t think so Hitler. Maybe, we should try and not try and gas the juices.”

The Hitler Nugget was starting to get agitated a little bit and he said, “But I have to do something Forrest! They must all die and burn in hell for what they have done!”

Forrest then said as he moved one of his hooves forward…in a sign of…something…and said to the Hitler Nugget, “Yes, and I understand that part Hitler. But maybe we should try and…control these feelings instead?”

The Hitler Nugget started to become even more annoyed by Forrest’s words and he then said with a tone in his voice, “Control my feelings!? I tell you what is out of control! THE FUCKING JUICE ARE OUT OF CONTROL! THEY ARE TRYING TO KILL US ALL AND RULE THE WORLD WITH THEIR FANCY FALVORS OF PURE DELIGHT! BUT THEY DISGUISE IT AS IF THEY IT IS PURE DELIGHT, BUT REALLY THEY ARE EVIL DELIGHT! EVIL I TELL YOU! THAT IS WHY THEY MUST BE STOPPED AT ALL COST! SEND ALL THE JUICES TO THE CONCENTRATION CAMPS AT ONCE I SAY!!! THE THIRD RIECH SHALL NOT BE IN VEIN I TELL YOU! THE FIFTH REICH SHALL REIGN SUMPREMEEEEEEEEEE!”

Forrest then said, as he moved both hooves up in and down, in a way of saying for the Hitler Nugget to calm down and he said, “Calm down Hitler. It’ll be alright. Look, clearly you need to channel your anger somehow. And since I don’t think you can let go of your anger against the juices just yet, how about we try something small first. How about every time you want to yell and scream the N word at juices in public, you should….write a letter…”

The Hitler Nugget calmed down and instead looked confused as to what he heard Forrest say to him. The Hitler Nugget asked Forrest, “Write a letter?”

Forrest then said, “Yes, write a letter. That way, every time you feel angry about something that you feel like is the juices fault, you can write a letter to them, expressing how you feel about them and why you feel that way.”

The Hitler Nugget was silent for a moment and after a moment had passed, The Hitler Nugget then asked Forrest, “And after I write the letter…should I give it to the juices?”

Forest then started to have an awkward look on his face, as if saying he wasn’t sure how to explain it to the Hitler Nugget.

So Forrest then said to the Hitler Nugget, “No! Not…yet at least. Wait a while before you send it to them.”

The Hitler Nugget was still calm, but even more confused than before as he asked Forrest, “Why? How will I be able to tell them to their faces that they are stinky, dirty, no good for nothing juices that deserve to be slaughtered by the millions in an unforgiving genocide?”

Forrest, as he continued to have an awkward look on his face, then said, “Well…uhh…it’s because uhh…Your writing! Yea, you need to make sure your writing is good enough for them to uh read it and everything! Good penmanship is important after all and you need to make sure your grammar is in tip top shape. You also need to choose the right words as well to make sure it’s the best delivery you can give to them.”

And Forrest had said that to the Hitler Nugget, he had a big, awkward smile on his face that looked like he was guilty of something, but really he wasn't. But he also had big eyes too as he had that smile on his face as well and his eyes also looked like he was guilty of something, and who knows, maybe he was. Maybe he is guilty of not liking the Dark Knight. But anyways, Forrest had also said that to the Hitler Nugget in a fast kind of tone.

That kind of tone that says, ‘Hey, I want to get this done like 'Sonic.' This is awkward, and afterwards, please put a bullet in my head because this endless loop of songs from the early 2000’s are driving me to drink and I want death, please give me death noooooooooow.’

Yeah that kind of tone. Of course there was a moment of silence for a while.

The Hitler Nugget had to think about what Forrest had said to him, but then he came to the conclusion and said to Forrest, “Hmm….you might be right there Forrest. And then after I improve on my skills of grammar, THEN I CAN GAS ALL OF THEIR BIG NOSE FACES AND TAKE BACK THE SHEKCLES THAT THEY STOLE FROM JONES! AND THEN JUSTICE WILL HAVE BEEN SERVED! AND ALL SHALL BOW DOWN TO MEEEEEEEE! DER SÜDEN WIRD WIEDER AUFERSTEHEN!!!"

The Hitler Nugget this time around didn’t just say sorry like he did the last time, and instead he just got up from his seat and stood on the ground, holding his little arms high in the air with the evil look in his eyes as well as a grin to go along with it. All that was missing was a sound of thunder in the distance and then it would have been complete. But I’m sure the thunder was a bit late. Anyways, after The Hitler Nugget had said that to Forrest, Forrest was a bit put off by it and wasn’t sure how to take it.

So instead, Forrest continued to smile awkwardly as he was before and said to the Hitler Nugget, “Yeah…sure…let’s go with that. Wait a minute…big noses…sheckles…oh never mind, I’m sure you’ll figure it out later there Hitler ol’ buddy.”

The Hitler Nugget then lowered his arms down and went back to his normal face a usual and had a big smile on his face as he was happy deep down with the advice that Forrest had given him.

And as the Hitler Nugget got back into his seat and back into the position that he was in right before he had yelled out at the top of his lungs, the Hitler Nugget said, “That is such a good idea Forrest. I would have never thought to write a letter to the juices. Thank you very much…friend.”

As the Hitler Nugget said the word ‘friend’ towards Forrest, the Hitler Nugget had his eyes half closed, had a warm smile on his face, and was pointing towards Forrest.

And in response, Forest pointed back towards the Hitler Nugget and said, “Right back at you Hitler. Anything that I can do for a friend.”

The Hitler Nugget, as happy as he could be, then asked Forrest, “Say Forrest, since you helped me out with one of my problems, how about I help you out with something? Like you said, friends help each other out.”

Forrest then had his smile go away and he then thought about it for few seconds, but then his face just turned into an embarrassing look as he didn’t want to impose or whatever…shit Forrest believes in.

So Forrest said to the Hitler Nugget, “No…I don’t need any help with anything Hitler.”

The Hitler Nugget then said to Forrest, “No really, tell me, there must be something you need help with. I could maybe help clean your house. Maybe move some furniture that you might need moving. Maybe I could run some errands for you. Help exterminate the dirty Zebra race.”

Forrest was then taken a back a bit and then was unsure as to what he just heard with his ears, so he asked the Hitler Nugget, “What was that last part you just said Hitler?”

The Hitler Nugget, with a smile on his face, said, “Nothing. But really, there must be something.”

Forrest then said, “Thanks for asking Hitler…but…I really don’t need help with anything at the moment. I am perfectly fine on my own.”

The Hitler Nugget then said with enthusiasm in his voice, “Wow, not only are you a good friend that helps others out, but you’re a friend that tries to be modest. Now I must help you out to return the favor someday. How come you are the only one that is willing to accept me and be my friend…UNLIKE THOSE DIRTY, NO GOOD FOR NOTHING STALIN AND HIS RED ARMY!?”

Forrest then said, “Well, I guess it’s because of how I was born and everything. I’ve always been this way and I guess I just had it in my heart to be this nice no matter what towards others. I suppose I might be deserving of something of good fortune in life, but I am fine with whatever life throws my way. I just hope I get to do the one thing that I really want to do this Christmas.”

The Hitler Nugget then got curious, but that happy kind of curious as he still had a small smile on his face and the Hitler Nugget then asked Forrest, “Oh yeah…well what is that you would like to do this Christmas Forrest? Is it to wish for world peace…by getting rid of all the juices?”

Forrest then said with a smile, “No no no Hitler…it’s nothing like that. Instead…all I want for this Christmas is to spend Christmas eve with my friends.”

The Hitler Nugget’s smile then went away and instead a confused, dumbfounding look was placed on his face.

The Hitler Nugget then said to Forrest, “Really? That’s it? That’s all you want for Christmas? Why not ask for something…else like a gas chamber to get rid of all of the fruits that are not oranges?”

Forrest’s smile suddenly disappeared as he was then reminded of his sad childhood.

He then looked out towards one of the nearby widows and then said to the Hitler Nugget, “Well…to tell you the truth Hitler, it’s the only thing that I’ve been dreaming of having for Christmas. Every year I’m alone and all by myself, with no family or friends to spend it with. I don’t even have a pet to spend it this Christmas with, so it’s always just been me up high in the sky, in my home, spending it with nopony else. I don’t have any friends to come over or family to spend it with. Not even anypony from my work wants to come over. I’m all…alone…but…ever since Knight came here and this being his first Christmas and all…I believe this year will be different. I believe that this will be my chance to spend time with my friends and give them a gift that they have always wanted, because there is nothing like a gift to me than seeing the look on everypony’s face when they receive a gift that they’ve always been wanting. That's all I want.”

The Hitler Nugget didn’t get mad, but wasn't happy either.

In fact, he was starting to feel a little sad on the inside, so he then asked Forrest, “Wow…so…you’ve always been alone on Christmas? Even when you were a child?”

Forrest then said, with a tiny smile on his face, but still an overall frown sitting upon the lower part of his face, “Yeah…even when I was a child it’s been like that. In fact that’s kind of why I ask for this one thing that I want to do on Christmas this year. It’s because of my father and that one year on Christmas when mom died.”

The Hitler Nugget was then interested in what Forrest had to say so he scooted a little bit forward on his seat and he then asked Forrest, “Ohhh….my mother died too! Looks like we have something in common…that means we can relate to each other now and that means we have a chemistry together as characters. Please Forrest…go on…”

Forrest then looked back towards the window with a sad, depressing look on his face and as he was looking outside, the soft, white snow was starting to fall outside and cover his window.

And so Forrest then said, “ Well…it was the year that mom died…”

And so we begin another flashback…so uh…..du do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do…

SOMETIME IN THE FAR PAST WHEN IT WAS DURING CHRISTMAS TIME

And so it's in the past, where everything is before. We are once again back in the crummy ol' place that was also Forrest's childhood home, the cloud trailer park. But let's get into the nitty gritty details however. The Cloud Trailer park was somewhere off key, somewhere not near Cloud City or Cloudsdale or anything like that, but it wasn't too far from Stalia however.

And as one would expect, it was dirty, muddy and littered with everything one can imagine a trailer park would be filled with. There was trash everywhere, with the trailers not even being made by clouds, but part clouds and part whatever they could find in the garbage. And the clouds that made up the ground weren't even white like most clouds, but instead a dark, dirty cloud. It wasn't quite black like a thunder cloud and looked more like the color of dirt, but it was somewhere in between those two colors. Not only that, but the entrance to the trailer park also had a somewhat broken, rundown sign that had all of those fancy, flashy lights attached to it to let others know that this was The Cloud Trailer Park and any other generic trailer park that's sitting in the clouds.

And of course the place was about as big as it could be to fit maybe roughly two hundred to three hundred ponies or so...maybe more...maybe less, who knows. What matters was that it was snowing, yes even when this was high up in the sky and as the snow was falling, the flashback focuses on a particular trailer.

A trailer that was sort of a weird, spring green kind of color on the outside, all as the snow fell upon it and slightly covered the window. And the flash back takes us inside where Forrest is having a jolly good ol' time decorating the tree. And apparently, this flashback that Forrest made magically includes a date of the 21st, pretty much saying it was only days away for a little Forrest to be getting a visit from Santa Pony. And little Forrest has a big of a smile as it he could have, even though in front of him the tree isn't anything special. In fact, the tree is only a three foot tree, maybe smaller, and it looks like it's a dead tree. It still has some pine needles attached to it, but only barely and it looked like those pine needles wants to just jump off and get it over with...just like the people from 9/11. The greatest Christmas Story of all.

Anyways, even though the tree is pretty much dead, and it looked like it was barely hanging on as he was decorating it, little Forrest seemed to have been happy just to be doing that. The dead tree didn't bother Little Forrest, not one bit. If anything in his eyes, the tree seemed to be perfect. Little Forrest didn't need to have a big tree to make him happy, because all that mattered was that it was a tree and that it looked nice. And little Forrest was decorating that tree alright, the best he could that was.

He only had maybe five or seven ornaments before he resorted to making his own ornaments out of papers or whatever he found from outside. But to him, as long as it looked like it was Christmas, that's all that mattered. And soon, after what seemed like a quite bit effort that he had put in, the tree was about to be finish as the flashback starts off with. And little Forrest had a yellow star that he had made out of construction paper.

Sure, it looked like a piece of shit, but in the end, it would look like something. So little Forrest, the pegasus that he was, used his wings and got off the ground. And soon little Forrest hovered a couple of feet from the ground and placed the yellow, paper crafted star on top of the tree. And once little Forrest laid that star on top, it limped to the side a little bit, but it was stable enough to call it a Christmas star. And so, once little Forrest was satisfied with his work, he gently landed on the floor, not making a single noise and sat down on his ass and looked on in awe to see his work.

If one were to have looked into his eyes that day, one would see a tiny bit of glimmer coming from his eyes, as his heart was ignited just by looking at the pure joy of a Christmas tree. It didn't matter if it had tinsel or was covered in silver and gold. What mattered is what it symbolized something. And to little Forrest, it was a symbol of that of harmony and peace as well as togetherness and family. It represented the good times to be had and to put aside differences, even if it was just for a moment before bringing those differences back. For a moment, little, Forrest was in a state of pure bliss as it was the time of year to be together around with family and friends and to celebrate a time of happiness and good will towards others.

And then in that moment of pure bliss, it was all disrupted as his deadbeat father spoke up. And once he spoke, little Forrest turned his little head around towards his back with a worried look as he was unsure as to what was going to happen next as it did kind of startled him a bit. And right behind little Forrest was the good ol' recliner that his dad was sitting in, as well as the big mother fucker himself sitting in it as well as a can of cloud beer. Although this cloud beer was a little bit special as it had a sexy picture of a female mare dressed up as Santa Pony.

Anyways, Forrest's dad said to little Forrest and interrupted him, "I have such a disappointing and gay son."

Once Forrest had heard those words, he looked back, with the worried look of course, and asked his dad, "Why do you say that dad?"

As Forrest had asked that, little Forrest turned his body around and to look at his father as he was talking to him.

Forrest's dad then said to him, "I knew I should have raised you better. But your bitch of a mom wouldn't let me have you. She kept yelling at me that I would abuse you and teach you the wrong things in life. WELL THAT BITCH HAD IT COMING TO HER THE DAY SHE DIED GOD DAMN IT!"

Little Forrest then said to his dad, "But...you killed her...rem.."

Little Forrest was cut off and Forrest's dad then said, "I know...I FUCKING RMEMEBER THAT FUCKING DAY YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT! She was taking you away from me, and that bitch wasn't going to get away with taking what came from my fucking ball sack. Back in my day, we called that stealing...or theft...which either you prefer. And so I had to do it...TO PROTECT THE FRUIT OF MY FUCKING LOIN! And I was sure that once I had taken you away from her, you would have learned to be a REAL STALLION! But I was wrong. You're just a no good, pussy ass fart eating mother fucker. Just like your mother. That's not to say I don't miss your mother Billy."

Little Forrest then said, "It's Forrest...dad."

Then Forrest's dad said, "Whatever, it's the same thing. My point Billy...is that I miss your mother too. I didn't marry and rape her for nothing you know? She was as a beautiful mare the day that I met her. And even my dad agreed with me, that's why he made sure we had a shotgun wedding instead of a real one. Well, it was a cross bow, but that's what we called it back in the good ol' days anyways. And it was perfect. Sure, her dad tried to prevent it from happening, but good ol' pops knew what to do and...used a bow and arrow and killed your mom's dad in the head. just like any other shotgun wedding. And so, when I made my vow that day, I promised to treat her like any other mare.

'Of course she didn't learn how to make a sandwich right or...give me a proper blowjob like a wife should. Hell, she used her teeth. Had to slap her a few times and threatened to knock out all of her teeth if she didn't learn how to do it proper. The point is...I don't hate her...well...aside from her trying to take you away and all, but I do hate you Forrest. You are my least favorite child and I hope you burn. You would have been my favorite if you would just follow my hoofsteps and learn on how to become a REAL STALLION...but you didn't. You are a worthless, pathetic, piece of shit. You are the most waste of pony life that I have ever seen."

Little Forrest was starting to tear up a bit as his heart was starting to break.

Little Forrest then asked his dad, "Are...Are you saying you don't love me dad?"

Little Forrest tried to say those words as he was trying to hold back tears that were welling up in his eyes.

Forrest's dad then said to him, "Yeah you damn right I don't you fucking twerp."

Little Forrest was starting to cry even more and more as tears started to run down his cheek and he asked his dad, "D-D-D-oes this mean...I have to leave...now?"

Forrest's dad then said, "HELL NO! You think I'm fucking retarded!? No, you don't. At least not yet. Honestly, if it was up to me, you would be on the streets, maybe a pedophile staring at you...wanting that sweet ass of yours. But I am legally obligated to keep you and give you food every now and then because if I don't, the pegasi police and the cloud police will be all over my ass and I'll probably be going back to jail. And probably not with the ones that has my jail buddies in it. And besides, the Cloud Police already have warrants for my arrest for killing those three innocent clouds and forcing them to give me a cloud blowjob...the only problem is that I'm not in their territory. But once I step in there, then that'll have my ass. But for now though...Billy...you have to stick around. But if you're going to be living here, I'm not going to be putting up with some gay ass tree that you have Forrest. SO I'M BURNING IT DOWN!"

And then, what seemed like out of nowhere...although by this point, I'm pretty sure it was out of nowhere, Forrest's dad took out a Molotov that was already pre-lit, and who knows, maybe he just had a case just stacked near him just for such an occasion, like what he was doing now. Well Forrest's Dad took the bottle, and chucked it at the Christmas tree that little Forrest had worked so hard on, trying to bring life to it.

Once the flames hit the tree, the Christmas tree went up in flames and smoke. What was left of the tree was clearly going to be merely ashes in a few minutes as Forrest sat there a gaped as his mouth was hanging down low, his eyes big as the sky, and his heart broken. Little Forrest had no words to say as all words escape his mouth, so he couldn't say anything but sit there and watch in front of his own eyes his work go up in flames. And as the Christmas tree burned in front of him, Little Forrest started to cry.

Tears started to go down his cheek fast as if it was suddenly raining and the water drops was going down his face.

Little Forrest, after taking a moment and soaking everything in, turned around to his dad and asked the question, "Why dad? How could you do this? It's Christmas!?"

Forrest's Dad then said, "I don't care about your faggoty ass Christmas you little bitch! What I care about during the winter time is beating my meat to keep me warm. So unless you're going to turn into some hot mare (and turn 18), GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FACE!"

Little Forrest was lost for words and was unsure how to respond, but then a little bit of hope sparked within him as he thought he could probably salvage this Christmas.

So Little Forrest said to himself quietly, "Well...I guess I could go to my friends houses and celebrate Christmas there..."

Then of course, Forrest's Dad spoke up right away and said towards Forrest, "Friends!? HA HA HA HA YHA! YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE YOU FUCKING LITTLE PRICK! Instead, you're going to stay here. And you can only go outside when I tell you to go outside. You will take a shit when I say you can take a shit. You got that you son of a bitch Billy!"

Little Forrest then continued to beg and ask, "But...but dad...my friends..."

And as Forrest was begging those words and was completely hopeless, the tears continued to pour from little Forrest's eyes.

And so, in response, Forrest's Dad then said, "Forrest...what did I tell you before? You. Don't. Have. Any Friends. You never have. And you never will. Friends...back in my day we didn't have friends. Instead what we had were gangs, and gangs was what made the world right. It toughened up the stallions and it got all the chicks to come towards us because if anything a mare likes, a mare likes gangs. Because that way you can have an orgy and it will not be awkward at all. So tell me...what does so called "Friendships" offer like gangs offer? Nothing! I tell you...this world is going to go to fucking shit with all this "Harmony" and "Friendship" shit."

But little Forrest protested as he said as loud as his tiny voice could say while still crying many, many tears, "But I do have friends! I do! I do!"

Forrest's dad then said, "Ohhhh...alright then...I'll play along with your game here Forrest. Your so called friends are not even your friends. You are the third wheel Forrest. A third fucking wheel, and how do you think that makes me feel, to have a son...THAT'S A THIRD FUCKING WHEEL!? WELL I'LL TELL YOU HOW IT MAKES ME FEEL! IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF AND IF I HAD A WOODSHED, I WOULD THROW YOUR ASS INTO THE WOODCHIPPER BOY! NO SON OF MINE IS GOING TO BE A THIRD FUCKING WHEEL! So that's why you're my least favorite and I disown you. Besides...your friends don't even like you. They come by every now and then just to grab a smoke with me, because they actually have balls while you go there and...do whatever pansy shit that you do when I'm not looking. They pity you Forrest...they fucking pity you. And that just makes you a loser. And you will always be a loser. A dimwit. A fucking retard. A faggot. Every name in the book, that is what you are Billy...I knew I should have aborted you when I had the chance."

Little Forrest, as broken as he was, and as a mess he was, then asked his dad a simple question, "What?"

As little Forrest continued to cry and cry, Forrest's Dad then said, "You heard me. I had a chance to abort your unborn fetus asshole...but your mom said it was, "immoral" and that "it was still alive and is a pony" Fucking bullshit...that's what it is. So...with that being said...you're not leaving Forrest...NOW GO SIT IN THE CORNER WHILE I JACK OFF!"

Little Forrest tried to resist by saying, "but..."

But then Forrest's Dad then said, "NOW!"

And so, as the Christmas tree continued to burn, and surprisingly not burn down the trailer itself, little Forrest hung his head down low as the tears continued to drip onto the dirty carpet. Little Forrest walked slowly towards the nearby corner and was a wreck. He was saddened by what his father had said to him, and that he wasn't going to able to celebrate Christmas at all of any kind. He just wanted a nice and peaceful Christmas for once, but instead, what he got was disappointment.

And so, Little Forrest walked to the corner laid down, and curled up into a little ball, and it was sort of a small ball too since he was only a small kid after all. And as little Forrest laid there, his back was to his dad, who was looking at Playcolt and was beating his meat off to a sexy mare wearing a bunny costume, while little Forrest continued to cry and cry.

And right before the flashback ended, little Forrest then started to sort of sing a little bit. There was no tune or anything like that, only the sound of his voice.

Deck..the halls with bales of holly...

Fa la la la la...la la la la...

Tis the season to be jolly...

Fa la la la la...la la ...la la....

And So, little Forrest closed his eyes and tried to sleep it all off. He was sad, depressed. He just wanted to sleep forever and not wake up. All he wanted was a nice Christmas with friends to celebrate with. But that was merely just a dream for him. In a way, he just wanted to die. So he could be in heaven and maybe then he would get his Christmas wish.

And maybe even spend it with someone with as well. And that's the end of that flashback...du do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do...

BACK IN THE PRESENT

And so, we're back in Forrest's house. You know...when Forrest is all grown up and stuff. He is his own stallion or some shit like that.

Well anyways, the flashback had ended and Forrest was hanging his head low with his eyes shut and said, as if he was explaining it all even though they all saw it, "...and that's why I want to spend Christmas with my friends..."

The Hitler Nugget was left in awe as his mouth was opened and he then said, "Wow...so your dad was really that much of an asshole?"

Forrest then said to the Hitler Nugget, "Well...kind of. I like to think he said those things to me because he's only looking out for my best interests. So I still love him...he just doesn't return any of my calls...or my letters that I sent him. I even try to show up every once and a while to check no him, but he just ends up being blacked out drunk and tries to beat me to a bloody pulp instead. So it's all fine."

The Hitler Nugget then said to Forrest, "Yeah but...he sounds like a real asshole. It sounds like...you're in denial there Forrest."

Forrest then exclaimed, "Oh no, you've got it all wrong! I'm not in denial. My dad is just showing how much he loves me that way. That's what he said to me after he beats me to a bloody pulp. My dad would never lie to me or try to hurt me in any way possible. If that's what he says what love is like from a father to a son, then what is what love is."

The Hitler Nugget then said to himself quietly, "Wow...and I thought I had the worst father."

The Hitler Nugget then said to Forrest, "Well...uhhh...if you say so Forrest."

The Hitler Nugget then gave a slight, awkward smile towards Forrest, trying to move past the abusive father relationship going on, but Forrest never seemed to have taken note about the Hitler Nugget's weird smile.

So Forrest continued to say while his first few words he had closed his eyes with a big smile, "I know so. And besides, I can forgive what my dad did to me back then. Sure it was sad, but now I have friends to spend time with during the Christmas season! And I have a plan on how to spend time with them too!"

The Hitler Nugget then took the awkward smile away and replaced it with an honest smile and got curious and asked Forrest, "Oh really? Well then Forrest, please do tell me."

Forrest then said, "Well later today, me and my friends are going to meet at the bar and hang out. And I was thinking when I go there, I'll talk to them and maybe try to see what kind of gifts they want. And I'll even invite them for a little Christmas get together too at my place!"

But then Forrest thought about something real quick and he then said, "Assuming they can find a way to get up here that is..."

Forrest then had a weird smile on his face with red cheeks, indicating he was a bit embarrassed about messing up on that little detail.

The Hitler Nugget then said, with a normal smile, "Well that sounds great! Well...good luck Forrest. I have get going back to my camp to train some new Nazi Nuggets into the Nazi Nugget Army!"

And so, the Hitler Nugget jumped down from his seat and on to the ground. He then proceeded to walk with glee and joy in his little Nazi Nugget heart while going over by a coat rack that was by the entrance where the Hitler Nugget had put his beige coat and bowler hat at when he had entered Forrest's home earlier.

The Hitler Nugget put on his coat and topped it off with his head and while the Hitler Nugget was doing so, Forrest had gotten up to get the door for him.

Forrest had gotten out of his chair, walked towards the door calmly, and opened it for him while Forrest was saying to the Hitler Nugget, "Well that's ok there little buddy. I have to get going too. It's almost time to go and meet my friends. Don't want to be late after all! But you're invited to come to the Christmas party if you want tomorrow."

The Hitler Nugget, as he was about to go out the door, with a big smile and glee all over his face, "No thanks. This was my cameo for the Christmas special! Well...see you in the next special Forrest! Hopefully it'll be for Halloween again!"

And then...the Hitler Nugget was out the door and was on his way off the set...I mean clouds and back to the Nazi Camp....a midget is playing Hitler Nugget and they are keeping him in a cage and only feeding him dog food and...ok ok..I won't say any more about it. The producers were ready to pull the trigger on that one...they better not blame me when he hangs himself somewhere in the background.

Anyways, after the cameo appearance from the Hitler Nugget, Forrest got his scarf from the coat rack and put it around his neck. It was a simple scarf, one that had the colors of orange and yellow, as well as a really dark shade of red to stand out against his red fur coat. They were in a pattern of red, orange, yellow, to represent the fire color of his mane and cutie mark. The design was that each color had a reasonably rectangle-ish shape throughout the entire scarf, with every red rectangle having a little snowflake design, to represent the Christmas part I suppose.

And once the scarf was wrapped around Forrest's neck, Forrest headed out the door and into the sky while also making sure to lock his door of course. And once he was outside, the sun was sort of out, but then Forrest flew downwards to the ground and passed the weather clouds.

And once he got passed the weather clouds, the sun was half gone as half of the light from Celestia's sun was blocked by the weather clouds that was making it snow. And on Forrest's way down, he could see pretty much the entirety of the land before him. pretty much the entire town for the most part. It was big and spacious, but Forrest simply headed towards the shopping part of the town as he had wanted to stop there first real quick before meeting us at the bar.

And beneath him that was the ground, there was snow everywhere...well for the most part. Where the ponies were walking, obviously wasn't covered in snow and was cleared as many ponies in the town had work to do. But pretty much everywhere else where there was little to no activity, like on the grass, it was covered in snow.

And as Forrest got closer to the round, Forrest could see kids having fun and playing in the snow like sledding and making snow ponies as well as ice skating and throwing snowballs at each other. As for the grownups, they were bustling on by, minding their own business. Some had smiles on their faces while others had frowns of despair. Some had to get to places like work or the post office to mail off packages for the Christmas season while others were simply shopping for gifts for their loved ones as well talking to one another. Yes, it was that time of season where this shit would happen.

But that part of the shopping district that Forrest was focusing on was not that of the shops themselves or the people around them, but simple to specific ponies. Ponies that dressed up both like Santa Pony and Pony Jesus. And as soon as Forrest had his target, Forrest landed on the ground swiftly and easily without a struggle and had a big, glowing smile on his face as he was happy to see Santa Pony. The pony wearing the Santa Pony costume was in the middle of the street and was wearing the typical Santa suit with the fake beard and all.

And as the busy ponies were passing by Santa Pony, the guy that was pretending to be Santa Pony was shouting, "Ho Ho Ho! Merrrrrrrrrrrry Christmas to one and all! Don't forget to give to the needy and the poor! And also don't forget that the time of year it is to be good to your loved ones! Ho Ho Hoooooooooooo!"

Forrest was sort of watching him from afar and was happy to see him standing out there, in the cold, and yelling stuff about being a good person...pony...whatever. And so, Forrest went ahead and walked right up to Santa Pony who was busy yelling out various things about the holiday season.

And once Forrest got up to him, Santa Pony looked at him and he then stopped yelling and said, "Oh...it's you...the red guy. What do you want?"

Forrest didn't take offence to the Santa Pony's rough nature towards him and continued to smile and said to him, "I just want to say that I admire you Santa Pony for coming out all the way out here! I mean, I know you must be busy and all and making gifts for the children way up north...but you really shouldn't be bothering to tell everypony here about the Christmas season. You should be getting ready for the big night...huh Santa?"

The Santa Pony said, "Yeah...sure...whatever..."

Forrest then continued to go no, "But I do love you and all Santa. Thanks for taking the time to come here and be with us. Although I must ask...do you do this at every other town or village or something? I mean...why us specifically? We're just some random, not-so-great town and all. You really didn't have to do this you know?"

The Santa Pony said under his breath, "Fucking Jesus...the city doesn't pay me enough to deal with this shit."

Then the Santa Pony said to Forrest, "Look, you keep asking me this every year. Don't you realize I'm just some guy in a suit and not real?"

Forrest then said with a smile while his eyes were closed, "Why that's nonsense! Of course you're real! You're standing right in front of me and we're talking. Besides, how else did I get that pile of empty cans of cloud beer that one Christmas when I was five?"

The Santa Pony then gave a slight sigh and said to Forrest while pointing to his left, "Look, why don't you go on over to the guy that's playing Pony Jesus and bother him and leave me the fuck alone?"

He had said that with a cynical tone as well. Forrest happily obliged to Santa Pony's terms and he said as he walking over to where Pony Jesus was, who was by the electronics store, selling somewhat outdated electronics by human standards, and said, "Sure sir! Whatever you say sir! Good luck on Christmas eve night!"

And so, Forrest walked to the left of Santa Pony, and as Forrest walked over to the guy that was pretending to be Pony Jesus, Santa Pony than gave another sigh and said to himself, "God I wish I could blow my brains out right now."

And so, Forrest walked towards Pony Jesus, who was being a bit preachy and was on top of a brown crate and talking to everyone that was gathered around him. And yes, there was a small group of ponies, gathered around Pony Jesus to hear what he had to say. As for the costume, it was a simple white rope with a red satchel across his chest along with a long mane and a beard that was the color of a dark brown. And the fur colors was a light brown color as well. And as Forrest got up there towards Pony Jesus, at least that guy that's pretending to be Pony Jesus that is, Forrest was able to get close to Pony Jesus, almost like a front row seat. As for everyone else that was listening in on everything, they all had smiles and opens ears on what Pony Jesus had to say. Forrest got up there and was eager to listen too.

Pony Jesus was preaching, "Come one! Come all! Heed what I have to say to you all! I am Jesus, therefore I bring love and compassion to all! Do not fear my mystical powers from the unknown world! I only mean to bring a message to you all! Be kind to one another this season! For it is a time that is most important of all! We must put aside whatever differences that we might have with one another and cast them aside! Aside from casting stones at each other, let us cast with love and bonds towards each other! And I do not mean just your family and friends, but everypony here as well! Even the poor need to be loved once and a while. You all should partake in ways to help the poor, for they are less fortunate then you! Help out and maybe, you will all be saved from a potential, impending apocalypse that may or may not happen with fake dates made up by loonies from the loony bin!"

And after Pony Jesus had preached, he then said, "Wow! What a great speech!"

Pony Jesus then said to Forrest, "Why thank you kind red thing! May god be with you!"

And as Forrest was about to walk away and head to the bar, Forrest said to Pony Jesus, with a great big smile and closed eyes, "Thank you very much Jesus!"

And so...Forrest was on his way to the bar. He had a bit of a ways to walk, but it would only take him maybe like...five minutes to get there. But everything was starting to look up to Forrest. He was happy as he could be and was filled with Christmas spirit and couldn't wait for it to continue and grow and grow until it became everything he loved so dear in his life.

Eventually he made it to the bar, the grey looking bar that is, that we always met up at. It was dirty as always and was playing that old country music that sounded like it came from fifty years ago, lightly playing in the background. There was one or two other ponies in the place, both sleeping or drunk or something and some bugs were flying around the place as well with the sound of the florescent light as well buzzing somewhere in the bar.

And as Forrest came to the door, he yelled out as loud as he could, "MERRY CHISTMAS!"

As for us, we were at the bar and we didn't say a single word. Not even the bar tender who was busy with cleaning his glasses and shit. But Forrest didn't care, as he walked up to us regardless and took a seat right next to me. As for our winter cloths, I had a simple, blue scarf on and nothing else. I had my usual black cowboy hat on and satchel, but that was it.

As for Neon, he had a green and white scarf, same design like Forrest's scarf, as well as a green and white beanie hat on with a little white puff ball on top. It also had a picture of reindeer as well on it symbolized with the color of green. As for Mac, He wore a brown scarf, same design life Forrest's but it was two colors of brown and light brown. He also wore a light brown vest on as well. You know...like the one from Back to the Future.

As for Arrell, he wore a scarf, same design and everything, except his colors were of gold and silver. He also were a beanie hat, minus the puff ball part, of the same colors although it had a wolf on it instead of a reindeer. He even had a sweater on, the same colors that matched his scarf as well as having a picture of a wolf on it. As for Jack, he wore a black leather jacket with a black sweater underneath as well a grey scarf and wore black sunglasses. He wore nothing on top at all...but he looked classy and cool.

So once Forrest sat right next to us, he looked at all of us and he asked us , "So...you guys ready for Christmas!?"

We didn't respond, except for Jack who gave a slight cough. And as Forrest continued to hang onto his smile, the bartender gave him a glass of beer, the same kind that we always had when we went there. As for us, we didn't have smiles on. Instead we had cynical looks on our faces and looked down in the dumps and everything. Well...except for Neon of course. He always wore a smile on his face, whether it for creepy intentions or not.

Forest took note of our smiles that were absent, but continued to smile nonetheless and asked me since I was right next to him, "Hey Knight, how come everypony here is so grumpy? It's the Christmas season, everypony should happy and jumping for Santa to come and bring everypony a present!"

And then we all remained silent. None of us wanted to speak to Forrest. In fact, the only response that Forrest had, while he still had his big, enthusiastic smile on his face, was another cough from Jack. Forrest then started to look a little worried about it all, as his eyes gave that certain type of worried look, but his smile still remained.

So Forrest then said to us, "Well I don't know about you guys, but I'm all ready for Santa Pony to..."

I then cut Forrest off and I then said to him, "Can you shut up Forrest? No one gives a fuck."

I had said it in a sort of mellow, but harsh tone nonetheless. So after I had said that to Forrest, his smile disappeared and he then had a concerning look on his face as he then said to me, "You don't care? But come on guys, it's almost Christmas! Aren't you guys excited?"

Forrest also had made some slight movements with his arms and hooves, and moved it around a bit to add to him talking.

Jack then spoke up, "All I care about for Christmas is that I can go to the orphanage and tell them to their faces that they don't have any parents and they don't get any gifts. Then I fart in one of their faces and give them a noose in case anyone of those little shits wants to hang themselves."

Arrell then said to Jack, with a curious, but equally worried look on his face, right before drinking his beer, "Isn't that a little harsh Jack? I mean they are just kids after all."

Jack then responded to Arrell with, "FUCK YOU ARRELL, THERE'S NO HOPE FOR THEM ANYWAYS! Besides...it's my thing and I go their every year to stick it to them where it hurts. In fact...I'll be heading over there in a little bit after we're done here. I've got a little present for Little Steamer...he he he..."

Jack then gave off a sort of evil grin when he gave off a little laugh.

And with that being said, Forrest still remained worried and he then said to us all, "But...but this is the Christmas season! How could you guys not be excited!?"

Forrest then had a smile on his face return, although only to make his point as he continued to say, "It's the most magical time of year. It's that time of year where you get that warm feeling in your heart and where you get to give to others and see the smile on their faces and their reactions! It's is also the time of year where you get to sing songs with your friends and family and you get to decorate a beautiful Christmas tree! You can even throw a party and have a little get together as well! And most importantly giving to the needy and the little fillies and colts that aren't lucky enough to have a Christmas on their own! It's the best time of year I tell you! And you even get gifts from Santa Pony if you've been good all year round!"

Arrell then busted Forrest's bubble and said to him, "Santa Pony is fake. We all knew it since we were colts Forrest. You still believe in that crap?"

Forrest then had a worried look returned to his face, although this time with a little bit more defense than the last worried look as he said, "But I'm telling you he is real! Santa Pony is real you guys! I even saw him one Christmas eve night!"

Arrell then said to Forrest, right after he took a sip of his beer, "Forrest, your home was broken into that time."

Jack then teased Forrest, "I bet you're one of those ponies that still sleeps with a teddy bear...aren't you Forrest?"

Jack had giving Forrest a certain type of look that pretty much said that he could read Forrest like a book.

Forrest, in response, then had his eyes straighten out along right and looked straight into Jack's eyes, "What? No I don't!"

And then Forrest got a little bit of shifty eyes going on. However, as soon as Forrest had said that, Mac then took one big sip of his beer and basically chugged it all down.

And as soon as he was done, he somewhat slammed his mug on the counter top and said out loud, "Well, if all we're going to be talking about is some red, magical, fat stallion that breaks into our homes and gives gifts to that dirty Applejack...I best be heading out,"

Mac then got up from his seat and started to walk away as Forrest then had his worried look return as he watched Mac walk past him for the exit.

Forrest said to Mac, "But...but I just got here! I thought we were all going to hang out and..."

Mac then gave a somewhat hopeful look towards Forrest with a small smile as he said to him, "I'd like to stick around and chat with y'all fellow Anti-Applejack comrades, but the apples need tending to and my little brother needs his daily beating if he doesn't play Catch the Empty Beer Bottle game with me this time. Well...I'M OFF...SEE Y'ALL ON THE BATTLEFIELD AGAINIST APPLEJACK!!!"

And then he gave a little wave and then he was off. Forrest watched as he had left the bar, and his mouth was a little open as his eyes grew a little bit bigger. His eyes started to show he was disappointed and was starting to become a little sad because one of his friends left him when he had just gotten there as well.

Forrest then said to himself gently, "But...but..."

Neon the interrupted Forrest with him finishing is beer and giving one big gulp with a big smile and said as he got up with an eager tone, "I've got to get going too! Mr. Sweet wants help putting up the Christmas tree!"

And then Forrest said as Neon was walking past him, "But..."

Neon then interrupted Forrest by grabbing a hold of Forrest's head with his arms and giving Forrest' a little noogie with his left hoof as he said to him, "Don't worry Forrest, we'll see each other again soon."

And he had said with a happy smile and all as he let go of Forrest and he then walked towards the exit as Forrest watched.

Neon then stopped once more as he was about halfway through the door, as he then turned his head around towards Forrest and he said to him, "Maybe in the basement!"

And then Neon was off. Forrest, who was still sad, said to himself, "Bye...Neon..."

Forrest even had his right hoof raised to wave goodbye...but Neon didn't notice it.

Arrell then said to Forrest, as Forrest's back was turned towards him, "Forrest, as a friend, I tell you this only once."

Forrest then had a confused look on his face, as he wasn't exactly expecting Arrell to be talking to him.

But he turned around to face Arrell and his full attention was on Arrell as he said to Forrest, "Just give it up Forrest. I know you have a heart for this kind of stuff but...I've been here in this town longer than you have. And I can tell you this Christmas spirit just isn't as big as it is in other towns."

Arrell then took one last sip from his mug as Forrest made a slight whimper sound.

And as soon as Arrell was finished, he then got up and said to Forrest, "Maybe you can try and celebrate it with the other ponies in Ponyville this year...they always seem to have Christmas parties. Maybe even Twilight might let you joint hers."

And then Jack spoke up as he pounded one of his hooves on the counter top as he looked downwards on the counter top while holding his mug, "FUCK PONYVILLE MOTHER FUCKERS! They always seem to beat us in everything, even in Christmas for Pony Jesus' shake! I'm telling you, they're HACKS! FUCKING FRUADS OVER THERE!"

Arrell then walked by Forrest, who had his head lowered as he was disappointed with the conversation he was hearing, and Arrell placed one of his hooves on Forrest's shoulder as he gave him a little smile and said to him, "Don't listen to Jack, he's just drunk right now."

Arrell then started to walk away, but Forrest's expression never changed as Jack then yelled towards Arrell, "Hey, fuck you Arrell. I'm not drunk, I'm just half sober!"

Arrell then said as he walking out the door, "Yeah fuck you too Jack."

And then he was out of there. Forrest by this point was really down in the dumps, especially since there was only three of us left in the bar.

Forrest had his head lowered way down as he then glanced over to us as he asked us in his gentle voice, "Jack...Knight?"

Jack then said as he pounded his empty beer mug on the table, "Don't give me that look Forrest! Look, if you want to have a Christmas this year, you're on your own. Don't go around...asking for us to join in any of your...fucking parities or reindeer games or some shit like that!"

Forrest then said, "But..."

Jack then cut him off as Forrest raised one of his hooves and started heading for the door, "Well I'm out of here! See you around Knight! And see you later...FAGGOT!!!"

When Jack had said that, he gave a little smile towards me, but as he walked passed Forrest, he purposefully bumped into Forrest and went through the exit. Forrest saw as his friend walked out. Of course Forrest started to wonder why he was friends with him anyways, but he then reminded himself, even though his friends used him as a punching bag some of the times...they somewhat got to together some of the time. As a team more less...but still... But then it was only down to me and Forrest by that point. And we were a bit far apart as well. He then stared at me, but didn't say a word. However, I then took my final sip of my beer, didn't finish it, but I had it most of it gone.

I then said as I had an ok look on my face, but one of a cynical kind, "Well, I better get going too. Can't expect to leave Wolf all by himself or else he'll fuck something else up again."

I then got up and started heading for the exit, but then as I was about to pass him up, he somewhat lunged forward and grabbed one of my arms with his hooves as he looked desperate and said to me as he looked up at me as I kept looking straight forward, "Please Knight...please tell me you at least like Christmas at least?"

I then kept looking towards the exit and gave a big sigh. I then shook Forrest's hooves off of me and I turned around looked at Forrest, as he was looking at me with all but of a worried, desperate look on his face and within his eyes.

I then said to him, "Why do you still care Forrest?"

Forrest then asked me, "Excuse me?"

I then said to him, "Forrest...do you want to know why no one cares?"

Forrest then said, "Is it because they are just having a bad day today?"

I then gave another sigh and I then said to Forrest with a straight face, "It's because it's old. It's childish. Grow up Forrest."

Forrest then tried to talk back and said, "But...but Christmas is..."

I then cut him off and I then said to him, "But nothing Forrest. Christmas is a holiday season mostly for the kids, and kids specifically. Look, when we were kids, I'll admit, it was a magical time of the year. We had our time with it, we had smiles, we had fun with it. Sure not every kid did, but back then it was magical. And now...it's not. When you're grown up, it stops being magical, just like everything that you or I or anyone else that has ever loved before.

'But as the years go by...it gets old. The magic starts to wear off, and eventually, very few start to give a damn. Most of us move on and have other better things to do or worry about. And Christmas is not one of those things that you need to move on and let go of it Forrest! It's just another holiday...and honestly...it's a good thing that we stop caring about it too. This world is a fucked up place, and it's better if stuff like this just stays in the background and dwindle in popularity with the old and the kids. Face it Forrest...you need to grow up and move on. Now I've got to get going. Think about what I said to you...ok?"

And then I was headed for the door, until he said to me as I was about to exit the building, "But...but I was going to throw a Christmas party and..."

I then cut him off and said to him as I looked back at him, "LET IT GO FORREST. I'll see you around."

And then I left and Forrest was the only one in the bar...except for the bartender of course, who was just minding his own business and reading the daily newspaper.

As for Forrest, he turned around towards the counter top, looked at his untouched beer and said with a downed face and said, "But...but it's Christmas. It's the most magical time of year."

But then Forrest shook his head quickly left to right and then changed that sad look on his face into a hopeful one as he said to himself confidently with a smile, "What do they know? Of course Christmas is the most magical time of year.......right?"

And then Forrest remained there as he tried to think of what I had said to him.

You could say some time had skipped. At one point, Forrest was leaning forward over the bar counter and said to himself, "Maybe they are right?"

And then at another point, Forrest was at one of the booths and was sitting back and said to himself, "No...no they can't be right. They wouldn't know of Christmas even if it had hit them in the face."

And then at another, Forrest was lying down on one of the booth tables and he said to himself with some doubt, "Well...they do kind of have a point. Especially with Knight."

And then at another point, Forrest was pacing back and forth across the open bar room and as he was saying to himself, "But...but they can't be right. Christmas is a magical time of year! It's the best time to be with friends and family!"

And then finally at another point, Forrest returned to his bar seat and he had his hooves holding his head up, almost as if he was bored, but really he was depressed and down in the dumps as he said to himself, "Maybe it was good only when I was a little colt."

Forrest then gave a little sigh as he slowly got up from his seat. He then started to turn his head towards the exit as he then said to the bartender, "Just put it on my tab..."

And then Forrest walked away with his head down and his eyes giving off of a sad look as well as the bartender not really caring and not saying thing. He was still reading the newspaper. And the amount of time that Forrest was there, a lot of time had passed.

And as Forrest left the bar, he used his wings and flew into the sky and was heading back towards his cloud home. However, since it was the winter of season course, everything got darker a lot sooner so it almost seemed like Forrest's day was just getting a little worse with the darkness of the night only adding to his misery. The sun had already set beyond the grey and depressing clouds and if one were to sit on top of the clouds, like every fucking dirty pegasus...they would be able to see Luna raise the moon and see the stars twinkle out at night time.

But of course, the clouds were still covering the sky...those grey and dark depressing clouds that pretty much represent winter for most of Stalia...that or it's just a cheap background on set that the producers paid illegal Mexicans three cents to make. It's made out of Styrofoam and dead cow meat. It fucking stinks. Anyways, Forrest was high in the sky, flying back towards his home when he looked back at that little market place that he was at earlier. He looked down with a frown on his face still, although not as long and down as it was before.

He looked down and saw that no pony was there. Everypony had pretty much closed up shop and was preparing for their last minute holiday shoppers for tomorrow, in which case, you know what those people are. They always seem to swarm the Walgreen and buy those cheap, plastic dollar store toys for someone's stocking and then pass it off as a gift from the heart.

And then you beat those savages with that said plastic toy until they bleed to death...and then you hide the evidence and call the police and...blame it on a black Santa Claus. Yes...it was the black one....he did it....as well as buying all of the tea from China. The Black Santa strikes again. Anyways, everything was closed and it was as if the place was a ghost town although there was a few lamp posts out there, shining the way as the snow continued to gently fall down from the sky as...it was snowing after all by this point.

Forrest looked down and couldn't help but smile a little bit and look at all of the decoration and the tinsel that glittered and the silver bells that gave off a nice shine that were all hanged up around the place. But of course with the doubt on his mind was starting to weigh him down and that little smile soon disappeared. But then Forrest thought of something and couldn't help but go down there, as he heard something coming from one of the shops. It made him very curious as he made that kind of face that pretty much said, 'What? What the fuck was that shit Nibba? I wonder what that sound came from and...oh...oh no...no way Nidda...fuck this shit I'm out. Ain't no fucking Nijja is going to get caught by that thing'...oh wait I'm sorry, I was thinking of a curious look from a horror movie.

My bad, what I meant to say was, Forrest had that kind of curious look that pretty much says, 'Where are all the white women at?' Yeah...that's the right one. Well, anyways Forrest heard something, but it didn't sound anything dangerous or frightening and Forest was just simply curious like a cat that has lost its way.

His left ear was out and a little but twitchy as it tried to hone on in the sound that Forrest had heard from all the way up in the sky. So Forrest went ahead and made a slight detour and went into that little shopping center area. And once Forrest made his way there, Forrest landed softly and safely on all of his four hooves and started trying to figure out where the sound was coming from. Of course Forrest still had that curious look on his face and the sound had gotten louder.

Once Forrest had landed on the ground, he started looking around in all directions to see where the sound was coming from. Fortunately for him, the sound wasn't too far and was easy to find since A. he isn't retarded, and B. the writers for this special are retarded...especially someone who cannot be named for legal reasons...a certain ghost... *cough*

Yeah...you know who you are you son of a fucking bitch...I know who you are and where you live...don't think I don't follow you. I know your place of work. I know what you like to eat and when you take a fucking shit on the toilet. I know you've also been ignoring my calls too and you just delete them on the answering machine. Who uses an answering machine anyways you...fucking weirdo? But that's ok...I'll keep trying...and I'll keep knocking on your door at three in the morning until you return what is mine.

Anyways, Forrest had found the source of the sound. It was coming from one of the shops with one of those windows that others use for window shopping and inside that window case were various Christmas related items like a Santa Pony suit and a Christmas tree and the like.

But one item in that case was the driving force of the sound, a simple record player to be exact was playing a sweet sound. It was a very Christmassy kind of sound too as it sounded like it came from an old Christmas movie like It's a Wonderful fucking Life or a Miracle on Rule 34th street... or that one where the little boy is in New York City and he gets those bedroom eyes from Tim Curry...Christmas classics I tell you.

However, despite it's sweet sound that it was producing, Forrest was kind of put off by it since he could hear the sound from all the way up from where he originally was. Forrest started to wonder if he was developing some kind of super hearing or something but he quickly shook that thought out of his head as it sounded retarded.

But at the same time, the sound to him sounded delightful, but it was odd that he could hear it all the way from up there. He then started to wonder through his mind, wondering how or why he was hearing that sound from all the way up there. 'Perhaps it's because the old record player is really loud? Maybe, it's the store itself is playing it on speakers? No, that doesn't sound right. But how could I hear it all the way from up there?,' Forrest was thinking through his mind. But then something threw him off his train of thought and a voice started to come from the record.

A regular speaking voice that is that was speaking over the cheery song. It was a male's voice and it was sort of rough around the edges due to it being sounded it was recorded a hundred years ago. The voice started to speak and sounded like it was speaking to Forrest, and of course Forrest had a weird but curious look upon his face once the voice started to speak.

The voice "said" to Forrest, "All around the world, there is always some kind of war. There is always some kind of hate or fighting going on. The hearts with ponies and within other creatures grows weak and filled with despair. But during this time of year, we all should come together and think of each other. During this time of year, we should put aside any kind of difference that we may have had in the past and instead come together to bring warmth and happiness amongst everypony else as well as to any other creature in this world. It may not be an easy task, but if one pony out there could step up to the plate and show that they have a heart, then perhaps this world would be a better place. Perhaps a threat from the dreaded windigoes would be nonexistent. Perhaps if one pony has a heart and gives, then maybe every other pony will do the same and spread that love and comfort all around the globe. We don't have to all agree with the same thing, our politics, or religion beliefs. We don't have to have the same colored coat or what's on our foreheads or backs. We don't even need to speak the same language. All we need is all to have a heart and come together peacefully regardless of who we are on the inside and out. Will it be you this holiday season that makes such a selfless act?"

And then the voice stopped and the song continued to play. But when the voice was talking, Forrest was still confused and taken aback a little bit. But as the voice went on and on, Forrest started to accept it and leaned in a little closer. And as the voice continued to talk to him, Forrest gave a slow, but big smile across his face.

A smile that was filled with warmth and happiness as pure as his heart. And his eyes started to become a little wide too, but not the kind of wide where he would be shocked, but instead, the whimsical kind of big eyes where they would grow as big as they could get and you could maybe even see a little twinkle in his eyes.

In his mind, hearing the voice had put him at peace and sort of sent him a message, a message to remind him that this was the season that he still loves despite his abusive father. That abusive father that I'm sure we all have deep within all of our hearts...and he whips us with his belt while our fugitively alcoholic mother watches...and then our abusive father says that we were a mistake and said that we should have been aborted when they did it in illegal Mexico.

That nice, warm, welcoming abusive father that we all have inside of us. Anyways, Forrest was listening and having pure joy fill his heart as the voice spoke to him, but once the voice ended and the music went back to the old timey music, Forrest was still deep within in his thoughts, thinking about what the voice had told him. And then, someone was right behind him. A certain someone that he would recognize. that someone being Santa Pony, or at the very least a pony dressed up as Santa Pony that is and looked like Santa Pony and sounded like Santa Pony.

As Forrest was in his mind and thinking of the voice that had spoken to him not just a few seconds ago with his eyes still filled with hope and dreams and his smile showing warmth and goodwill, Santa Pony was right behind him and leaned in close towards his ears.

Of course you would think Forrest would have seen him in the reflection of the glass window that Forrest was standing in front of, but he was too busy being in deep thought and didn't notice, although strangely enough though, when I went back and took a look at what happened, there was no reflection at all whatsoever. Well, there was a hint of a reflection, but nothing of the norm that is. It looked like someone was right behind Forrest, but really it was unclear as to who.

Anyway, Forrest was minding his own thoughts when Santa Pony, being right behind him, leaned in forward and said to Forrest calmly and in a welcoming deep tone in his voice as well as with a smile on his face, "Beautiful, isn't it?"

And then Forrest was startled by Santa Pony speaking right behind him and he jumped up in the air.

He didn't jump up that high in the air and only jumped up maybe an inch or two, but he was spooked and had a scared and startled look on his face as he jumped in the air. And when he did become startled, he made a little shrieking sound, in a way to say he was unexpectedly interrupted by someone he did not expect to be behind him. And after he came down from a short jump, he quickly turned around, still with a scared look on his face and quickly looked at who it was who had startled him. Of course, at first glance, he had recognized him to be Santa Pony.

And once he did recognize him as to be the one that would break into someone's house to leave weird gifts under a dead tree, Forrest then quickly turned that spooked look into a face filled with relief.

And Forrest said with a small smile upon his face, "Oh, it's just you Santa Pony. I didn't know you were behind me."

Santa Pony then said warmly and with a continued smile, "It's quite alright. I didn't mean to frighten you."

Forrest then asked Santa Pony who was then staring back into the glass window and enjoying the music and festive decorations and such, "What are you doing here Santa Pony? Shouldn't you be at the North Pole, getting some rest and preparing for your big day? I mean, I know you like to be out here in Stalia and talk to other ponies, but you really need to prepare to deliver the gifts after all!"

Santa Pony then said, with a calm and deep tone in his voice as always, "Yes, you are right, but I like to sometimes take a break and go around Equestria and see the sights. Of course I did notice you out here in the cold Forrest, being all alone when every other pony is asleep. Why are you out here Forrest?"

After Santa Pony had asked him that, Forrest was left with a bit of confusion on his face, as he was a bit taken aback that Santa Pony was asking him a personal question.

But then Forrest got to thinking about it and he came to the conclusion of, 'Wait...why am I out here? I was on my way home while having what felt like my heart broken until I heard singing...and then I heard a voice. What do I say to him? Should I lie? The songs do say he knows when I've been bad, and I assuming he knows that I would be lying too. The song also says he knows when you touch yourself at night. What do I say to him?'

Forrest had thought in his mind. So Forrest then had a nervous look on his face, having little shifty eyes, almost as if he was trying to hide something, but he was trying his best to keep his cool.

So Forrest said to Santa Pony, "Well uhh...hmmm I'm not sure why? I best get going then, I do want to catch some rest since it's late at night after all. You know what they say Santa, you know we're sleeping!"

And Forrest made some slight movements, those kind of movements that suggested that he was about to launch from the ground with his wings and fly into the sky so he can go back to his home and think about what had just happened to him.

But right before he was about to take off, Santa Pony stopped him by looking towards him with still his warm and hopeful smile and gave a little chuckle and said, "He he he he...so the songs say...look Forrest, I didn't mean to scare you or make you feel uncomfortable. I'm just curious as to why you are out here is all. Are you out here looking for gifts? Are you trying to find something inside of your heart that you're not quite sure of? Are you uncertain about yourself? Or are perhaps doubtful of your goodwill towards others maybe?"

Forrest then looked down towards the ground and thought about it for a few seconds.

Forrest then thought to himself, 'Am I doubtful? Well what Knight and what I said back at the bar did put some doubt in my mind. I mean...Knight was right after all. But...no, Knight isn't right? No, he's wrong, they are all wrong about this time of year! That pony on the record player had a point. So no, I don't have doubt...unless...do I?...'

And As Forrest was thinking, he started to show a little doubt on his face and Santa Pony himself could see it as well. However, Santa Pony did know show any hateful emotions towards him though or wasn't offended by it neither. Instead, he got close to Forrest's face and used his right hoof and placed it on Forrest's chin and gently raised Forrest's head up to look him in the eyes. And as Forrest felt Santa Pony's gentle touch of his hoof, he then noticed what Santa Pony was doing as he too looked at Santa Pony's face.

And once Santa Pony had done that, Santa Pony then said to Forrest calmly with another small chuckle, "He he he, I know you have doubt within your mind Forrest."

Forrest then said, with a confused face, "You do?"

Santa Pony then said, as he backed away a little from Forrest and turned to look back into the shopping window, "Yes, it is shown right on your face Forrest."

Forrest then looked back towards the ground, made quick little circles on the ground with his hoof gently, and looked like he was disappointed and said, "Oh...I suppose it does."

Santa Pony then said without looking towards Forrest, "Do not worry though Forrest. We all have doubt sometimes within our minds and hearts. There is nothing of to be ashamed of having a little doubt."

Right after Forrest had heard what Santa Pony had to say about his doubt, Forrest's head quickly sprung up, as if it was some kind of spring and Forrest had a little smile form across his face a little bit and said to Santa Pony, "Really?"

Santa Pony then turned his head around a little to look towards Forrest and said to him, "Yes, of course Forrest. We all get it sometimes, even I have doubt sometimes on my mind."

Forrest then went back to having a curious, but confused look on his face as he raised one eye brow up and he then asked Santa Pony, "You do?"

And then Forrest while changing to look to have wide eyes as well as a surprised face and such and raises one hoof in the air to express his feelings said to Santa Pony, "But...but you're Santa pony! How could you have any doubt!? I mean you're one of the best ponies to have ever lived...right next to Princess Celestia of course. I mean, you TRAVEL THROUH OF ALL OF EQUESTRIA! There is no doubt in my mind that you wouldn’t have any doubt."

Santa Pony again then gave a little chuckle and then said to Forrest, "He he he...of course you would say that Forrest. I've always enjoyed your optimism and enthusiasm over the years. Even when you were just a little tike. But...do you know how much it takes to go through all of that, especially in one night?"

Forrest then went back to having a confused look on his face and then rolled his eyes a little bit upwards as he turned his head towards the side and raised his left hoof towards his mouth, although not directly on his mouth and said, "Ummm..."

And after Forrest had thought about it for a few seconds, Forrest went back to having a normal happy look on his face and said to Santa Pony, "It can't be that much! You have magic unlike anypony else! Except for maybe Princess Celestia of course…"

Santa Pony then looked towards Forrest while still having his body facing the window and said to him, "I'm flattered that you think I'm that special. Buuuuuut...aside from living for so many years, I'm still a simple pony just like you or anypony else. I sometimes have doubt in my mind if I can get all the presents made, wrapped, and packed all onto the sleigh. Not only that, but I have to travel while everypony else is sleeping and trying not to wake them up in the slightest. That is my job after all. And sure it's only once a year, the doubt weighs down on me throughout the entire year."

After Forrest had heard Santa Pony tell his story of doubt, Forrest had a bit of whimsical in his eyes, but also a big curious look at the same time and asked Santa Pony, "Really Santa? You're just like any of us?"

Santa Pony then turned his body and gave full attention towards Forrest and got a teeny bit closer towards him and said to him, "Well, I do have a little special magic that no pony else has. He he he, but for the most part, I am not god and I don't have super powers in order to do everything, especially all by myself. That's why I do have help after all. The point that I'm trying to make Forrest is even though I have doubt weigh heavy on my mind, I don't let that stop me. I know sometimes it can be hard to do it sometimes. I know sometimes it can be hard to get out of bed every morning and to do whatever it takes to have it completed even.

'And I thought of you doing a certain task can be sometimes frightful and makes you doubt yourself that you cannot do it at all and that you will fail somehow. I get that all the time and I know you get it too sometimes Forrest. I have been watching you with a close eye after all. He he, but, even when it gets extremely hard for me and I can't help but feel doubt in my heart, I always remind myself that I need to do the task at hoof. Whether that be going out to deliver the presents or going outside in the cold, windy weather. Things must be simply done Forrest.

'And I know for a fact that you have doubt on your mind on something very special. Just remember Forrest that you have a heart. That you have a heart and determination that you will do what you do best. My part is to deliver presents to all the colts and fillies across Equestria. And what your part is, I'm sure is just as important as any other pony's part is. So believe in yourself Forrest, believe with all of your heart. Just listen to the music with your heart if you have any doubt."

And so, after Santa Pony had spoke to Forrest, both Forrest and Santa Pony turned their heads to the window and Santa Pony raised his right hoof and pointed towards the record player that was playing the lovely, hearth warming tune. And Santa Pony sort of let go of Forrest and Forrest, sort of like in a trance, walked towards the glass window and started to listen to the music closely.

And suddenly, the music started to get a little louder, but then Forrest, as his face continued to have a look of curiosity on his face, closed his eyes and started to think heavily on what Santa Pony had just to him. And then the music started to become louder and louder until...he opened his eyes and there was a little glimmer of light sparkling in his eyes with a big, bright smile across his face.

Forrest then said to Santa Pony as he continued to look into the glass window and at the record player, "Oh thank you Santa Pony! I know what I have to do tomorrow! Oh thank you thank you Santa Pony!"

And as Forrest was still starring at the glass window, Santa Pony said right behind him, "Don't mention it Forrest. By the way, that is quite a dashing look alike suit of mine in that window."

Forrest then responded with, without looking back at Santa Pony, "Oh I don't know about that Santa..."

And then Forrest mumbled on a little bit more, as if he was talking to Santa Pony, but Santa Pony kind of just disappeared after he had said that, as the other Santa Pony, the one from earlier with the one that was all dressed up, came walking by with a smoke in his mouth and the fake beard hanging low as it wasn't attached to his face.

He was starring at Forrest and he was talking all by himself and all the fake Santa Pony could do was have a little mouth open while keeping the little cigarette in his mouth as the burning smell of nicotine filled the air around him and into his lungs, slowly killing him, and I’m sure we all dying on the inside too...

The fake Santa Pony then walked a little closer as he was sort of scared since he didn't expect to see a pony talking to himself late at night and he then said towards Forrest as he got a little closer and stopped, "Who in the hell are you talking to?"

Forrest then turned around to see the fake Santa Pony, although he didn't recognize him to be a fake Santa Pony as he still saw him as the real Santa Pony and ignored the fake looking beard on his face that was hanging down, all with a smile and said towards him, "Why, I'm talking to you silly!""

The fake Santa Pony then said to Forrest while still having the lit smoke in his mouth, "No you weren't...I just came out here to get a smoke and I hear you over here yapping to someone. Are you fucking crazy or something?"

Forrest then said out loud towards to the fake Santa Pony as he got close to the fake Santa Pony's face, all with a big smile on his face and his eyes closed for some reason, "Of course not Santa! Why would I be crazy!?"

And on that last part that Forrest had said to the fake Santa Pony, Forrest opened up his eyes with a big, wide whimsical look in his eyes and even leaned in a little forwards towards the fake Santa Pony's face.

Forrest then after saying went back into a normal standing position and looked upwards and said to the fake Santa Pony, "Well, thanks again Santa for the talk! It really helped me! SEE YOU ON CHRISTMAS DAY!"

And then Forrest launched from the ground and high into the sky and flew as fast as he could back towards his home. And as Forrest flew back to his home, the fake Santa Pony titled his head upwards and watched as Forrest went back into the sky and then said to himself quietly, "Fucking Pony Jesus Christ, kill me now."

A FEW MINUTES LATER

And so, after a long ass time of pretending that Forrest was flying to the next scene and getting the sets back up and making sure everything was in its proper place like getting the light set up, making sure the midget who played the Hitler Nugget was fed because apparently the producers put a deposit on him. I’m assuming they got the actor midget from a seller in Cuba, but I might be wrong on that…it might have been New Jersey…although if I had to bet, it would be New Jersey.

That and one of the camera guys didn’t want to start filming until he got his coffee and we kept saying to him that there was no assistance or intern in his contract. He was only there to handle the third camera for five bucks…and that’s it. He even signed a contract with the producers saying if he did not do what he was told, he would be fed to the beef chickens, and no, I do not know what those are. But my guess the producers have those for something else they are doing. But the camera guy didn’t want to listen so we had to let him have his way because we were all tired and wanted to get the shoot done so one of us had to go get the coffee…guess who drew the short straw?

Well anyways, where were we? I don’t have the script, there was only one and someone had to use it as toilet paper. Anyways, Uhhhh...yeah I know where we left off at. I remember, so Forrest had spent flying for a few minutes and quickly got back to his house. His little home in the sky. Everything was dark as it was night time of course, the producers really wanted to put an emphasis on that part right there. And once Forrest got to his front door, he quickly unlocked it and sort of kicked the door open with his right hoof.

I say kick it open because it opened kind of fast and made a loud banging sound once the door had swung all the way around to the wall, the one hundred and eighty degrees and what not, and you sort of do that by kicking it. But Forrest, the low hanging weakling fruit that he is, sort of did a half kick. It wasn’t a kick, but he had pushed the door with enough force to make a banging sound, but he did not do it out of anger. Instead he had done it with joy filled within his heart.

He had a big, huge smile across his face where you could even see his bright, white teeth shine with just a simple light bulb. He was very happy and overcome with joy. He had the spirit of Christmas and the spirit of giving in his heart and he knew that despite what I had said to him earlier at the bar, he wasn’t going to be down in the dumps.

No, instead he was going to go through with his plans and make sure that this was going to be the best Christmas he was ever going to have. He knew that he had never really celebrated a real Christmas before and that this year in particular, that was going to change and that he was going to make his only wish for Christmas come true.

And so, Forrest eagerly got into his house as she was shaking a little bit from the pure joy he was feeling in his bones and closed the door.

He then proceeded to hang up all of his winter cloths on the little coat rack that was by the door and he then said out loud to himself, “I CAN’T WAIT FOR TOMORROW! I KNOW WHAT I’M GOING TO DO AND I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE IT ALL COME TOGETHER! I’M SO EXCITED I NEED TO TELL SOMEPONY! I KNOW…”

And so Forrest had felt the feeling that some time others get of wanting to tell someone else and thought of who he wanted to tell his Christmas feelings to. So Forrest quickly flew upstairs without even using the steps that he had in his house…although it is a bit weird, why the fuck doesn’t he walk and, oh never mind.

Anyways, Forrest went up stairs and quickly went into his room. And as far as his room goes, it’s mostly just bare bone stuff. A nice soft cloud bed with a cloud pillow. There was a cloud drawer and a cloud picture hanging up on the wall along with a cloud lamp right next to the cloud bed sitting on top of a cloud night stand…yup…everything was made of clouds. And you can thank the producers for that one. We kept telling them that Forrest’s real home was not just made out of clouds, but they kept insisting this would make sense to the retarded kids…apparently this was airing on PBS as well.

Yay…well aside from that little side note, the only thing that wasn’t made out of clouds in the room was the blanket, the bathroom, and a brown teddy bear with a smile on its face. And I know what you’re thinking, no, Forrest does not fuck that teddy bear because he’s lonely. He uses the stuffed rabbit for that as well as the stuffed Mickey Mouse that the producers gave him because at one point we were sponsored by Disney, but then they kicked us off of their Christian Minecraft Sever because one of us got drunk and swore on it.

Now we’re banned from all Disney theme parks and we are specifically instructed to stay three hundred feet away from all executives that work at Disney. And the court also ordered us to never utter the word Disney and just call them The Big D. And The Big D said that if we were to ever break any of these rules, we will be bent over and raped in the ass by them…and the judge approved of this too just so you know.

Not even the jury had a problem with this. But hey…look on the bright side…that teddy bear is Forrest’s real teddy bear, the one that he brought from home. That’s something.

Anyways, once Forrest had gotten into his room and closed the door, he started talking to his Teddy Bear in a calm sounding voice, "Hello Teddy! What a day it has been! I tell you, I might not have a marefriend, but at least we have each other...right buddy?"

Forrest then had a hopeful look on his face and paused as if he was waiting for the teddy bear to come alive and give a response. He had just starred at his teddy bear, waiting, as silence filled the air around him. The teddy bear didn’t speak. It was an inanimate object. Go figure. But Forrest, the weakling that he was, responded back as if his teddy bear did say something back to him, so either he's mentally insane or he truly is forever alone.

Anyways, Forrest said back to his beloved teddy bear as he was walking away, "I know, I know, it would be nice to have pony else besides the two of us. But that's not important because I've got exciting news to tell you Teddy!"

And then Forrest once more paused again, as if he waiting for a response. As Forrest paused however as he was walking towards his bathroom and turned on the lights and after a few seconds of awkward silence had passed, Forrest then continued to speak to his teddy bear.

Forrest then said to Teddy, "Well if you calm down for a second Mr. Fluffy pants, I'll tell you! Well it all started as normal today, Hitler Nugget came over for a friendly visit."

As Forrest was in the bathroom, he was getting his tooth brush ready to brush his teeth to get rid of any germs or bacteria off of his teeth and gums...now that I mention it is quite weird that ponies in this universe, and same goes for me as well...have human like teeth. Thinking more about it just horrifies me and I'm starting to question my existence while being i a pony like body...it's just so fucking weird.

Anyways, Forrest then continued to say to his teddy bear, "Then I went to meet my friends at the bar. They're reaction...wasn't so friendly. Let's just leave it like that as I'm sure you want me to spare you the details. He he he he..."

Forrest gave off a nervous laugh towards his teddy bear and had an awkward smile on his face. But then Forrest went back to the joyful pony that he was and went ahead and brushed his teeth. Of course this in turn temporally impaired his speech a little bit, but he could still for the most part form full words and sentences.

So Forrest continued to say as he was halving a mouth full of tooth paste and such, "To put a long story short...I wasn't really feeling good about it all. I know I shouldn't be let down by anypony at all whatsoever. But these were my friends!"

And after Forrest had said what he had just said, he then proceeded to spit out into the sink and rinse his mouth off with water and no mouth wash because who knows, maybe it's too late for him and Gum Disease has already got him.

So who knows what gum disease's next evil plot will be...probably taking down the New World trade center building in New York City. Yeah...it'll blow it up…with a toy train brain...raisin bran train... What? So Forrest then continued to say while having a bit of a disappointed look on his face, but also mixed with a bit of a hopeful look as well both at the same time somehow, if that makes any sense.

And his eyes were looking upward as well as his head a little bit for whatever reason he might have done it for. Forrest then said as he was still standing in the bathroom, but could talk clearly once more, "These are the ponies that I can trust! The only ponies that I can trust...in this whole...entire...world...surely they wouldn't let me down and that they provide honest feedback to me if I've done anything wrong...right?"

Forrest then started to show a little bit more doubt on his face, as I'm sure it was starting to fill his heart as well.

But then Forrest shook his head a little bit from side to side and said to himself with a smile while getting rid of that doubtful look on his face, "But of course I'm just being silly! I'm like that sometimes, and I'm sure you know what I'm talking about...right Teddy?"

When Forrest had asked his teddy bear that short question, Forrest had then poked his head out of his bathroom and pointed his head towards his teddy bear with a big smile once again waiting for a response from an inanimate object, although he did have his eyes closed once more. And the teddy bear just sat there...starring into blank space and if it did have a soul in the first place, it'll probably be thinking about its existence and screaming out of pain on the inside as he wanting to commit suicide.

Not because of Forrest of course, but because his whole entire life is being a fucking teddy bear. I know I would want to go and commit die if my whole life was just a fucking teddy bear. I mean...just imagine being a lifeless bear with no purpose and just sitting there. You don't have to do anything, not even go to the bathroom. Sure it sounds like a good idea and that it sounds like paradise...but in hindsight, you just would want to die.

You would rather become a vegetable than become a teddy bear, like a carrot, so that way you could stab people with your pointy bottom. And then that way you would be able to say the N word because all carrots are handed the N-word pass from birth. But the tomatoes are handed the C word pass…nigga… Although now that I think of it, Tomatoes aren’t even vegetables…are they? My god…no wonder they don’t have the n word pass…it’s because they have the W word pass. Wigga…

Oh...the feelings that teddy bear must feel.

Anyways, after a few seconds of silence had passed, Forrest then said, while opening his eyes back open once more and said to his beloved teddy bear, all with still a smile, "Yeah, I know Teddy. I know I should probably change my habits sometimes. But sometimes I just worry is all, you know Teddy?"

Once Forrest was done sticking his head out of the bathroom door, he then turned off the bathroom lights and went back into his bed room, along with a bit of a worried look on his face while facing and staring at his teddy bear.

Forrest then continued to talk to Teddy and say, "I mean, sometimes I can't help it you know. Sometimes I think about the scary what if stuff and then it starts to get to my head sometimes and then I don't know what to think! It scares me."

Forrest then went from a worried look on his face and to a more happy and calm look on his face as he continued to say, "But of course I try and think of all the good things. I try and think of the happy memories and how lucky I am to have such good friends. And of course I try and remind myself that I'm lucky enough to have you."

Forrest then had a bit of shifty eyes going on and then quickly turned his head to the right and to the left. Sure, he was all alone with his teddy bear, but from what I could tell, Forrest was afraid if someone was in his room, as if he would have not seen them.

That or maybe a spooky roast or something, who knows really.

But aside from that, Forrest looked at his surroundings and then stretched his neck out a little bit and put his left hoof towards his mouth and slightly whispered towards his teddy bear, all the while having a little smile across his red face, "Psst...Just between you and me Teddy. Aside from the other guys, you mean the entire world to me."

And then Forrest made a cute little squeaking sound for no reason at all, closed his eyes for a quick second while sticking his tongue out... What? Anyways, then Forrest went back to a normal standing position, bent his legs a little bit, and hopped into bed...literally, he just hopped right into it. But of course he landed on the covers and landed near teddy a little bit. He didn't jump that high up though, just jumped at a normal height and such.

And right when he touched the bed, he quickly got under the cover and grabbed a hold of his teddy bear with both of his fore arms and held him tightly against his cheeks. He could feel the soft, fake, brown fur being squished against his soft, fur covered cheek...because you know...ponies and shit... Forrest also had a big, warm smile on his face that would make you aware that he was safe and sound in his own little world, as his eyes were closed thinking of the best things in his life that he had ever come across.

He held that look for a few seconds. And inside Forrest's head, a sweet little tune was playing, all to himself, almost as if he needed to remember this little moment for all of entirety.

And after he held that look for a few seconds, he then opened up his eyes, soften his smile a little bit, and said to his teddy bear in a soft, almost childlike voice, "Good night Teddy. I love you forever and ever with all my heart and soul. Try to have sweet dreams."

And then Forrest and made a quick clopping sound by banging both his hooves from his forearms together, and that in turn turned off the lights.

Again...it was the producer's idea. And another sponsorship. This time sponsored by...hold on let me get the paper...ummm...THIS SEGMENT WAS SPONSERED BY LARRY'S BIG CLAPPER! IF YOU ARE EVER LAZY AND DID NOT WANT TO TURN OFF THE LIGHTS WHILE IN BED, THEN GET LARRY'S BIG CLAPPER! JUST CLAP WITH YOUR HANDS TWICE TO TURN OFF THE LIGHTS SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO GET OFF YOUR FAT LAZY HAMBONE ASSES! LARRY'S BIG CLAPPER! TRUST US, WE'RE NOT GAY! NO HOMO!

Ok that was the end of the sponsorship and I get no money out of this. Only the producer's son does. Well anyways, back to the Christmas special...

THE NEXT MORNING

And so we come to the next scene. And in case you want to know some behind the scenes stuff when it came to the scene change, we paid seventy illegal Mexican workers, only cost the studio about five cent an hour per illegal Mexican. Although we do have to feed them since they keep them locked up in the studio basement and stuff. Uhhh... also ten crew members died, a light exploded, and Forrest almost caught a seizure, and even if he did, we wouldn't really care.

And he would be screwed because the producers and the studio does not provide any kind of health insurance. So he would be screwed. But even if he was back in Stalia, he still didn't have health insurance...mostly because he has no clue about finances. He is hopeless. That and the rest of us just had cheap, black coffee that tasted as piss poor as Starbucks. So regards to that, here comes...or came...or coames what happened after Forrest had gotten up and shit. Well it was the next day, it was Christmas Eve and I recall it being early in the day too.

Well anyways, everything was normal; the grey clouds were in the sky and covering the sky, with some snow on the ground in a few places. Some patches of snow left untouched while others were just muddled together. Overall, a typical day almost as if it wasn’t Christmas eve. But it was, so...yeah... Anyways, we start back at my place, my home...the library or Stalia's library or at least as much as a library as a real library is a movie rental store.

So, I was in my own home, minding my own business, everything was just fine. And Forrest came from the sky and landed, pretty much wearing his normal winter cloths as yesterday and he had a smile that filled him with confidence. And it made him look like he was ready to tackle the challenges ahead. He also had a little saddle pouch bag thingy on his left side sort of like mind but more loose and less stylish.

It was a just a simple, plain, vanilla white bag and he was carrying a note pad and a pencil in it. And so he walked up to my door, calmly, and raised his right hoof and gave a few, hard knocks on my door. And after he had knocked on my door, a good few seconds past by and of course I had heard the knock on my door. So, I went to the door and opened it up. And I wasn’t really in the mood that day. Wolf was annoying me that day with him drinking all of the beer in the house and somehow complaining he wasn’t drunk yet, even though he was constantly walking up the stairs and falling down over and over and over as if it came out from some kind of Looney Toons or Tom and Jerry cartoon. Except he was made out of wood so I’m not sure if he feels anything.

Now that I mention it, I have no clue if he feels his nuts being broken as he goes down the stairs either. Get it? See what I did just there? Wolf is a timber wolf and made out of wood, so his nut shack would be a pair of actual nuts? Did you get it?.....SHUT UP!!!... It was funny and you know it…It was…oh fuck it, these specials are driving me INSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANEEE!

Well aside from that I had opened up the door with what Forrest was greeted with was no warm, welcoming smile like he would give. No, instead I offered a sort of depressed, cynical look upon my face.

That kind of look that says, ‘I’m tired of it all. When will the pain ever stop? Is this why I’m still here? To be tortured like this forever? Did I actually die long ago and this is just my sentence from god and I really am in hell instead? What has my life become? I used to be somebody man!!! I WAS A SOMEBODY!!! I mean…just look me up on goggle and you know…you’ll know that I was a somebody! WHAT HAVE I BECOME!? IS THIS WHAT I HAVE BECOME!? ENTERTAINMENT FOR TARDS!!? God I need a drink. I just need some more beer to take the pain away. Just to take the pain away god damn it.’

You know…that kind of expression that sometimes people and others have on their faces. All without showing any signs of that with my mouth. It was just straight across my face…like…like…uhh…is poker face still relevant these days? Of course not, it’s whatever…year you’re reading this in and it’s probably long gone. Well whatever, you get the point, my face was dull and left without any substance or color or anything to really brighten it up a bit. That was the face that I had offered to Forrest.

However, with what I was greeted to by Forrest was his normal, smiling face unless of course a girl hit him. And which case I would shut the door on him and tell him to man up…or Stallion up as they say in Equestria…I think. Or I might have just imagined that when I was high that one time. Anyways, Forrest was his usual happy self, except he seemed a little bit more happy than usual. And I noticed that as well once I had opened that door.

Once I had opened that door, we just stood there in awkward silence for a few seconds until the sounds of Wolf’s wood crackling as he fell down the stairs again and him yelling out in the background, “I’m ok!...I can do this! No need to help me!...let me…just get up again and try it again…”

And after Wolf had said that to himself pretty much in the background, Forrest then broke the silence between the both of us and said to me, “Hi Knight! So how’s it…”

I then cut Forrest off and said to him, “What the fuck do you want Forrest?”

Forrest then responded to me as he sort of jumped up in the air a little bit with excitement and asked me, “Well it’s Christmas Eve of course! Aren’t you excited!? Can’t you just feel the Christmas spirit in the air!?”

I then said to Forrest with no expression change on my face, “Don’t you remember what I told you in the bar yesterday Forrest?”

And then Forrest’s happiness and optimism seemed to then have toned down as he seemed less excited and energetic. He still had a smile on his face though, but it was much smaller and he just looked like if it was one of those awkward kind of smiles instead. He even had the look in his eyes too, almost as if he was embarrassed by it as well.

Forrest then said to me as he sort of looked towards the side in embarrassment, “Oh yeah…he he…forgot about that…”

But then Forrest said to me as he returned to the look when he first came to my door and before I popped his joy bubble, and jumped up a tiny bit while doing so and looked directly at me in the eyes, “ But that’s not why I’m here!?”

I then got a little bit confused and had a weird look in my eye, and then the expression changed on my face as one of my eyebrows rose upwards, showing that I was unsure and a bit worried as to what Forrest was trying to get at since that’s not how he usually works.

Or maybe it does, but aside from that, I was also taken a back a little by Forrest’s movements…literally, I stepped a little bit backwards and after Forrest had talked to me, I then asked him, “Then why are you here then?”

And then Forrest pushed himself a little bit into my home and was pretty much standing halfway through the door as he pushed himself forward with his body, all with a smile on his face, almost as if I hadn’t popped his joy bubble by bringing up what I had said to him at the bar. I then got wide eyes when Forrest did this too and became a little bit worried.

Forrest then said to me while doing this, all the while having his eyes become a little bit mellowed out, “Well um...I’m doing a little secret, private project of my own and I wanted to come on by and wanted to ask you some questions, Knight.”

And then as I took a step backwards to gain a little bit of personal space from what Forrest took away from it, I then asked him, “And what are you going to ask me then?”

Forrest then looked a bit weird, as if he was caught off guard and for a brief second had wide eyes, almost as if he was caught red handed..hoofed…whatever…and was pretending that he didn’t do anything, with whatever he had done at least that was the look in his eyes for a brief second that was. But after that second had passed, he then went back to normal and just looked like he was embarrassed.

But Forrest had said while portraying those emotions on his face, “Well uhh…you see the questions that I would like to ask you has something to do with Christmas. I want to ask you…if it’s alright that is…if you were to, perhaps, become persuaded to love Christmas once more or something like that. A what if kind of question that is. What would be one gift would you want in the whole wide world!? You know…assuming you want to answer that kind of question that is.”

And then Forrest gave off a little nervous laugh and looked at me with his eyes as if he was trying to hide something.

I then stood there, squinted my eyes at him a little bit, as I was a bit suspicious as for what he was up to, but then Wolf came tumbling down the steps once more and he then said out loud in the background, “OW!”

And when that happened, I just went back to the expression that I had before when Forrest had came knocking on my door and then asked Forrest, “What is this little project of yours again?”

Forrest then said, this time cheerfully with an expression on his face and wrapping one of his forearms around my neck and moving other free arms a little bit to show a little bit of gesture, “I can’t tell of course! Like I said…it’s a secret. But don’t worry a single thing about it."

I then said to Forrest, “You either tell me what the project is for or get the fuck out of my house now.”

Forrest then took his arms off of me and had a little less joy on his face, but still had some left and said to me, “Well…I don’t really want to say, but…I thought about what you said in the bar Knight.”

Forrest’s smile then slowly disappeared and it turned into a sad, frowning face, almost as if he was heartbroken and he couldn't accept the truth as to what he was saying. Almost as if he was trying to resist what the truth was, but couldn’t hold back any longer and had to face the music.

And so Forrest continued to say to me, “I thought about it a lot and well…you’re right. This whole Christmas thing and the spirit of it, it’s nothing to get all riled up about. I mean, I still do believe in it Knight. I still have a small part of me that this time of year is the best time of the year and that everypony should experience it. But I get it though Knight…something's were only good when we were younger. Things are only magical when we were younger and as time passes us by it becomes more shitter and shitter and the only thing we have to lay back on is the nostalgic memories of it. And then we lie to ourselves that it was good times and that we’ll find other times like that somewhere else, even though that time was only one of a kind. I get that Knight. But...I still want to hang on to what I’ve got, and one of the things that I have left in this world is Christmas, my friends, and uhhh…my little buddy...thingy…”

Forrest had said that last part while looking nervous and having shifting eyes going back and forth across the room as he was a bit embarrassed to admit his teddy bear was what he loved the most.

However, I didn’t notice right away and didn’t care all that much but I then raised one eye brow and I then asked Forrest, “So is that it?”

I had said if I was unamused, but really deep down I was curious where this was going.

But then Forrest then said to me, as he went back to his sad and heartbroken face, “Well, I thought about it and such and, while I understand what you said, I get it, I fear that little part of me of liking this whole Christmas is dying. As well as everypony around me like you said one day and soon there will be very few ponies left that likes Christmas. Even though it means much to me, I’ll have to let it go one day. I mean sure there will be probably another holiday some jackass in a suit will try and make up to sell us things and convince us it's just the beginning *cough* but those old times will never be the same again and it’s gone forever. And before that little part of me dies and goes away, I just want to say to make a list and make a little poster showing off all the things that we have ever wanted in our hearts during this time of year. If we had that one chance to fall in love with it all over again and bring that magic back and right the wrongs, even if it was just for a day, what would be the one thing that you would wish for? That is why I ask this Knight…”

And then Forrest went from a sad and disappointed look to a nervous and shifty look very quickly as he knew he was lying. He still had the Christmas Spirit, he was just trying to go undercover and let me hear what I wanted to hear so I would cooperate him. At the time, it seemed like something was amiss, but at the same time it sounded so genuine and honest that I fell for it. And that is why I’ll find a way to ban Forrest from the next Christmas Special…because as much as I want to avoid it, the producers has us locked down in a contract. Fucking…asshole.

And the worst part is that he tricked us. Sadly he isn’t a jackass in a suit like everyone else. He’s a jackass in a suit that smokes a cigar. He looked like he knew what he was talking about too. That clever son of a bitch. But chances are we would still fall for it again. So anyways, I then looked at Forrest for a few seconds, even though he was looking nervous and was looking like he was going to sweat or something and was giving me a weird look, I thought about what he had said.

And then I came to a conclusion and finally figured out what he was getting at…at least at the time that is.

So I then said to Forrest, “Ohhhh…I get what you're trying to do..”

And right when I said that, Forrest gave me a confused look on his face, but a surprised confused look where he had one eye brow up, but he didn’t look worried and looked like he was confused, but yet curious and a little bit shocked.

Forrest then said softly to me, “You do?”

I then said to him, as Wolf came tumbling down the steps one last time, “I sure do."

I then raised my left hoof and wrapped it around his neck and said to him, “It’s ok to let it go Forrest. It just means that you’re finally becoming one of us.”

Forrest then was just plain confused on his face and said to me, “I am?...”

I then continued to say, “Yup...you’re finally seeing the way we see things. You’re becoming dead inside just like the rest of us. And soon you’ll just be like us and you’ll be joining the club as well. And then once you’re fully dead inside like the rest of us, we’ll finally stop calling you a faggot and let you join our game nights. I’m proud of you Forrest…you’re growing up. So yeah I’ll answer your questions.”

Forrest then had a big ol’ smile form across his face right when I agreed to do what he had asked of me as well as a little bit of glimmer in eyes and he said to me with enthusiasm, “Really!? Well then, I’m ready when you are!”

And as he had said that, he immediately went and grabbed the note pad and pencil. He was able to hold the note pad with one hoof, but he ended up holding the pencil with his mouth like how everyone else usually does it.

I then said to him, “Yup…you’re slowly becoming dead inside like the rest of us. You’re in the denial stage but soon you’ll be in the acceptance stage like the rest of us…faggot…”

I then said to Wolf, as he was still on the ground after his recent attempt of doing whatever he was trying to do, while not looking at him and just saying to him with my back turned towards him, “WOLF! Go the basement and fetch the beers we serve when we have guests over!”

Wolf then said, as he slowly got up, drunkenly that is, “WE HAVE MORE BEER IN THE BASMEENT!? WHY THE HELL YOU DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU FUCKING NARC!?”

I then said back to Wolf, “Just get the fucking beers.”

Wolf then said back to me as he went to the secret basement thingy while mumbling and being annoyed that he was unaware of the beers downstairs, “Son of a fucking bitch…you’ll get your beers alright.”

I then slightly raised my right hoof as a gesture and said, “Here Forrest, take a seat.”

Forrest then said, while still having a big smile on his face, “Wow…a seat!? I must have really gotten on your good side huh?”

I then said to Forrest, while Forrest was finding a spot on the recliner chair thing, “You’re starting too Forrest…you’re starting to Forrest.”

And keep in mind, I was not smiling or was happy that I thought Forrest was finally becoming one of us, but instead I just had that normal, depressing, ok look on my face as usual. Mostly because we’ve been kept hostages by the studio to do this shit. So, I then took a seat on the couch, well, as much as a pony could do, while Wolf finally came back from the secret basement thingy with all my stuff from earth and came back with three special beers. Wolf gave me one and I used my magic to open it up and took a sip while Wolf just opened up his as usual.

As for Forrest, Wolf gave the last bottle to him, but when Forrest saw the beer, he then said, “Sorry, I’m not in the mood to drink right now.”

Forrest had politely said that with a little nervous smile on his face and I just replied to him with, “Pussy.”

I then took another swig of my beer and Wolf did his as well.

After we were done, I then asked Forrest as he looked ready to jot down any notes at a moment’s notice, “So, the hell you want to know what I would wish for Christmas?”

Forrest then said with a smile on his face, and probably in his heart, “Weeeeelllll…I would like to know if you could have any Christmas gift for whatever reason, big or small, what would it be and why?”

I then rolled my eyes up in my head and thought about it for a few seconds. And as I was thinking about my answer, Forrest was leaning forward in his chair and anticipating my answer.

And after what felt about a minute had passed, I then said to him, “A silver bell.”

Forrest then wrote it down and after as he was doing so, while somehow holding a pen in his mouth, I don’t know, ponies are weirdo sometimes, he said, “Interesting. And why would you want a silver bell; for Christmas? Does it represent a lost childhood memory of yours? Was it something that you lost when your parents died? Did your dead parents give you a special silver bell and it holds a specific meaning in your memory that you forgot about it and you only remember it by seeing it in your dreams during the Christmas season? Or is it because deep down, you loved Christmas so much that something happened that broke your heart to despise Christmas once and for all?”

I then asked Forrest, “What? Where the fuck did you get dead parents from? You know I don’t have any…at least any that I know of…at this moment in time.”

Well…I said that…what do you expect? They didn’t know I was human. They still thought I was one of them, a fucking pony. I wasn’t going to blow my cover, not even on set.

So Forrest then said to me, “I know but...I’m just trying to guess and stuff. But still, why do you want a silver bell, if you mind me asking of course?”

I then said to Forrest, “I don’t have a fucking clue?”

Forrest’s look then went to a bit of a worried look and he then said to me, “But…you just said you want a silver bell? You clearly gave it some thought.”

I then said back to Forrest, as Wolf continued to trickle down his beer, “I know, but do you really think that I have anything to wish for. I’m only doing this because you asked. I didn’t say I would have an answer for you.”

Forrest was then a bit confused, but worried and he then gave a little hesitation and said to me, “Ooookaaaaayyyy….then. Can I ask at least what made you think of a silver bell in the first place?”

I then said to Forrest, “I don’t know. I just thought about it and something in my mind just said to say a silver bell. It felt weird, but I think that’s just the first thing that just happened to pop into my mind, you know?”

Forrest then said to me, “Well…that sounds like a nice wish Knight.”

I then was a bit confused and I asked Forrest, “Really? That’s a nice Christmas gift?”

Forrest then said back to me, “Of course!”

Forrest even said it with a big smile and with his eyes closed...again...but then those eyes opened back up and he then said to me, “It’s such a simple and sweet gift that it’s sort of beautiful in a way. In a way of a dead Christmas wish that is. He he…but it represents what gift giving is all about though. It’s the thought that counts, and the thought in what you would want is nothing big or expensive. Clearly it represents that spirit of Christmas and deep down represents your inner child that begs for you to return to that happy, younger self of yours.”

I then thought about what Forrest had said to me and I was going to say how much of a faggot that he still was, but I brushed it off and I then said to him, “Whatever…”

I then proceeded to chug my beer while Wolf then asked Forrest, in a drunken manor, “What about me you…fucking red covered pony asshole?”

Forrest, who was not offended by Wolf’s language or tone of voice towards him, said to Wolf and looking towards hi, “Oh? And you have a Christmas wish that you would you would receive if you could too Wolf?”

Wolf then said, as he looked a bit messed up in the eyes, mostly from the beer, “Yeah! You hear me right…you fucker! I demand you to ask me the same question like this bastard over here!”

Forrest then said, “I would be delighted to do such a thing Wolf! Go on tell me what you ‘wish' would be?”

Wolf then threw his mostly empty beer bottle to the side, and quickly got back on all fours on the ground and ran up towards Forrest, almost as if he was angry with him or something like that. He even had a bit of an angry look on his face well. And the thing was it was so sudden as well. He had his wooden claws make noises when it went clash against the wooden floor that was a part of my living room.

And his hind legs sort of leapt as Wolf ran towards Forrest as well, all the while the beer bottle he threw to the side broke into several little pieces with some of the beer that was left in it creating a small puddle for Wolf to clean up later because I wasn't going to be cleaning up his shit. That filthy fucking animal. Oh wait...

Anyways, and like I said, Wolf quickly went up to Forrest fast and was only a mere few inches that was left between Forrest and Wolf's face. And they were at eye level too and Wolf was pretty much the alpha here as he was staring Forrest down a little bit. And Forrest had a wide and shocked eyes as this was all sudden and was unsure on how to react to this sort of thing that had just happened.

And as for Wolf, it felt like he had a bit of momentum and immediately put it to a halt once he got close to Forrest's face. And when he was all up in Forrest's face, all Forrest had to look at was Wolf's deepened and sort of trance, mesmerizing eyes as Wolf's eyes have always been just a neon kind of green color with a hint of magic, metaphorically that is, coming out of his eye sockets. And all with no pupils...because timber wolves don't that those sort of things here in Equestria.

Anyways, Once Wolf got close to Forrest's face, he was whispering to him at first, but with a bit of a determination and command in his voice. He was also a bit fast when he spoke it too, while also making weird movements with his eyes that showed weird, but appropriate expressions for he was drunk off his ass.

And so, Wolf said to Forrest, "Give me he beer. All of it."

Forrest then responded while sort of having his face stiff because of Wolf's sudden actions, "Excuse me?"

Wolf then responded to Forrest with, "You heard me you red son of a bitch. I want the good shit. I want the fucking good shit that you pegasi winged mother fuckers have been hiding from us."

Forrest then started to change a bit of his face expression a little but about halfway through as his eyes rolled up to his head and one of his eye brows rose with it and he was trying to figure what Wolf was talking about.

Forrest then said, "I have no idea what you're even talking about Wolf. Wait...are you talking about Cloud beer?"

And then once Forrest had mentioned the correct name to what Wolf was referring to, Wolf immediately backed off and yelled out loud, "YOU DAMN RIGHT YOU FUCKER! I want that fucking pegasi shit! Your kind has been hiding that shit from the rest of Equestria and it's about time I think we have it since us unicorns..."

I then sort of cut him off and corrected him quickly and said as I continued to drink my beer afterwards, "You mean me Wolf..."

And Wolf then continued to speak and say, "Knight and the rest of the unicorns have been feeding all yours asses by planting food in the crop fields and forcing the Zebras to work it all off for hundreds of years!"

I then quickly corrected Wolf again and said to him, "That's the Earth Ponies that make the food and the Zebras have never been enslaved...yet..."

Wolf then continued to talk and he said to Forrest as he tried to show some pride in his drunken voice and in his body position and movement, "My point still stands...you and your kind better bring me my fucking Cloud Beer or there shall be a race war...and it'll start with a school shooting."

I then quickly corrected Wolf one more time and I said to him, "Now that's a bit too far Wolf. Everyone knows that a race war starts with a shooting at your local Wal-mart, then the churches...and then the school comes next. And it only happens when someone becomes the biggest loser too. Thems the rules of a race war."

Wolf then finished with saying to Forrest, "Point proven Knight! Point Proven. So you and your kind Forrest better deliver the goods...and the shit better be legit or else I'll get the...cartels on your asses. I think. Or maybe it's the...gangbangs that I have to get...whatever!!!"

Forrest then sat for a few quick seconds, looking a bit worried and nervous and reacted to Wolf's comments with saying, "Ok but...did you really have to use 'Your Kind?' I mean it just sounds like you have something against the Pegasi or something."

Wolf then quickly got up close to Forrest's face and pointed one of his claws on his left paw towards him and he said to Forrest loudly "YOU'RE DAMN STRAIGHT I DO! You dirty, filthy fucking pegasi and your fancy fucking wings...WHY DIDN'T THE BIG H GIVE ME FUCKING WINGS!?"

I then said to Wolf, and it was a bit out of character because it had to be said...or else...the studio...and I said to Wolf, "Because Hasbro is not affiliated with you or associated with you in any way shape or form. We've already signed the contracts and the courts said we have to put this in the credits of everything that we do or else we'll be sued up the ass. But then the studio's producers got involved and threatened to bomb the Hasbro building...and they also said that it would start the Great Hooky War. Don't ask me what that means, for all I know it means a Texan with a hook like penis."

Wolf then backed off and as he did, he sloppily walked back towards the stairs and he then said as he was stumbling around up the steps, "Whatever...I'm going to...fucking bed...I need my nappy time and some more alchoaly to put me to sleep. I'll see you fuckers in the next few hours or so...YOU HACKS!!!"

And then he went up stairs and slammed my bedroom door. And then me and Forrest sat there in a few awkward moments of silence and Forrest starred at me while I kept looking upstairs.

And once a few moments of silence had passed, Forrest broke it by asking me, "Is he always like this or was it just me?"

I then said as I looked at Forrest and then told him, "Well considering that he's an alcoholic and a sex addict, this is pretty much the norm. I mean he was just drinking on set not long ago."

Forrest then looked at me, obviously breaking the fourth wall a little, "Really? I thought alcohol wasn't allowed on set? I thought it was just water or grape juice?"

I then said to Forrest, "Well he isn't but he threaten to kills the security's families and snuck on to the set anyways."

Forrest then asked me, while putting one of his right hoof on his forehead, "I'm just wondering how he knows about the Cloud Beer? Only Pegasi knows about that and we're not even in the real Equestria right now. His line in the script was supposed to be that he wants a sex toy. Specifically the one that makes it feel like you're doing anal with somepony."

I then pointed out to Forrest, "Wolf thinks we're still in Equestria."

Forrest then said, as he looked like if he had made a realization of something, "Oh...is any of this real though? I mean I know the sets are but everypony else is the same? Like last Halloween?"

I then said to Forrest, "For the most part...yes...and don't ask how or why. The studio tells me jack fucking shit."

Forrest then asked me one last question, "Where are we even being broadcasted?"

I then said to Forrest, "UPN...and the broadcast is being time traveled into the year 2000 and possibly altering the future as we speak."

Forrest then said, "Oh..."

And as one last thing to say to Forrest, "Get the fuck out of my fake house."

AT NEON'S PLACE...

And so, the next scene transition, I mean right after Forrest left my fake home...yeah that's better, he made his way towards Neon's place of work...and also his home. I mean...everything is Neon's home. Neon is everywhere, Neon is everything, Neon is love, Neon is hate, Neon is life, Neon is our hearts, Neon is our minds, Neon is God, and Neon is nothing. Neon does not exist yet he does exist at the same time. Don't think about it too much or else Neon will see you in your nightmares tonight.

Anyway, Forrest made his way to Neon's place and as Forrest was happy as usual and still having his smile on his face. And of course, there was still snow everywhere in and around Stalia and by this point, most of everyone else was out and about, going about their own businesses and such. And Forrest was heading to Neon to ask him what his wish would be. And Forrest walked up right to Neon's place, wasn't even going to knock since it was a place of business and shit. Well, Forrest got up to the front door and right when he was close enough, Neon popped out.

When this happened, Forrest was then taken aback by this, had wide eyes and his back stiffened a little as the door immediately opened and Neon's and some of his upper body, including his forearms, popped out as Neon's facial expression was his usual happy smile and all. Well...at least I think he's happy...that or he's in pain like Forrest's teddy bear.

And with Neon, once he had poked his head and forearms out of the door, it was so sudden and scared Forrest a little bit. It was almost as if Neon had sensed that Forrest was near and he took it upon himself to greet him when he came to the door.

And so with that being said, once Neon had popped out like that, Neon said to Forrest, "HI FORREST! I'M SO GLAD THAT YOU'RE HERE! I'VE GOT A NEW RECIPIE FOR YOU TO TRY OUT!"

Forrest then said, "Wha...AHHHHHHHH!"

Before Forrest got a chance to what he wanted to say, Neon, with all his might and strength, which keep in mind wasn't very much because...Neon...grabbed Forrest with both of his hooves very quickly and almost as if he was nothing and pulled him into the store and as soon as he pulled him in, he then plopped him down right next to the counter. And on that counter was a batch of cupcakes.

And as soon as Forrest was plopped down by Neon, Forrest was left confused and not sure what to say or do as he had that kind of look in his eyes that said, 'Where am I? This isn't the my home? This isn't even my grandchildren. Where am I? Who are you people? Where are my clothes? Where is my underwear? Where are my genitals? And why am I in a bath tub full of ice? Why is there blood everywhere? Why are there markings on body where my kidney would be? What is any of this? And why did I decide to go to New Jersey? This was a bad idea...I knew I should have gone to San Diego. At least there only take one of your lungs and part of your liver. And in San Francisco, they only take your left leg and leave it in a bowl of rice in a rice paddy field somewhere in Vietnam. I'm rating New Jersey 1 star.'

You know that kind of look that you see others have in their eyes. And right as soon as Neon plopped Forrest down right next to him, Neon, who also wasn't wearing any type of winter cloths...but he possibly keeps warm with all the souls that he has reaped....then started to have wide eyes more than usual, as the pupils in his eyes shrunk down to a little dot, pretty much giving him that insane look and he even went a little crossed eyed for a few seconds and had his head titled up just a tad bit.

And right as soon as that happened, Neon then said to Forrest, "HERE, take a cupcake Forrest! It's a new recipe that I have made for the holiday season and I want you to try one!"

And as Neon was saying this to Forrest, he had picked up a cupcake and then made a gesture that was saying that he was offering one to Forrest. And as he made this gesture, Forrest slightly raised his right hoof up in the air a little bit, looked at the cupcake with still a confused look in his eyes, his ears slight pulled backwards, and his mouth a little bit opened, almost as if he was trying to say something but couldn't find the right words to say.

And as soon as Neon was finished asking Forrest to try one of his delicious new cupcakes, Forrest then said, with a bit of an embarrassed look on his face and a nervous smile, "No thanks Neon, I don't really have the time to be trying one of your delightful treats at the moment."

Neon, who had changed facial expression although the pupils did come back to normal size and it looked like he was looking at Forrest instead of looking at two different directions at once, then said to Forrest, "COME ON! YOU HAVE TO TRY IT ONCE FORREST! IT'S GOOD FOR YOU! I MADE IT OUT OF BODY PONY PARTS THAT I CHOPPED UP IN MY BASEMENT BY TRICKING OTHER PONIES INTO EATING A CUPCAKE, THINKING THEY WERE TRYING OUT A FUTURE RECIPE, BUT REALLY I WAS DRUGGING THEM TO HARVEST THEIR ORGANS BECAUSE WHY NOT AND HOPED YOU WOULD ENJOY IT!"

Forrest then went back to his confused look with his eyes looking like they were being worried a little bit and his smile disappearing with Forrest saying, "What?" Neon then said as he put the cupcake that he had on his hoof back with the other batch and picking up the said plate with the batch of cupcake organs and throwing it to the side and making a weird crashing sound when it did hit the floor.

Anyways, Neon said, "KILL THEM ALL!"

Neon then went back into his normal standing position and pretended as if he never made the cupcakes at all.

Forrest, after hearing what Neon had to say, then brushed it off, shook his head a little, rolled his eyes back, and had a little smile and said to him, "Oh Neon you. You're always so random and funny with what you have to say he he..."

And then Neon gave a little cough, although it wasn't a cough, it was like if he was throwing something up from his mouth but yet nothing came out except his tongue, you know like a 'blagh', but if he was throwing something up...but he wasn't.

Well, Forrest then said, "He he...never change Neon...never change."

And as Forrest was saying that, he was smiling even more and had his closed and wrote it off as Neon being funny. But really Forrest was just in denial, like everypony except for me.

Anyways, Neon then asked Forrest, "Well what are you waiting for Forrest!? Ask me the question you were about to ask me!"

Forrest then got out his note pad and pen and had his eyes back to being open and such and looked like he was comfortable and he then said to Neon, "Well, alright then NNeo...wait...how did you know what I was here for?"

Neon then wrapped one of his forearms around Forrest's neck which in turn pushed Forrest's head a little down as Neon stood on his back hind legs and waved his other free forearm as Neon looked down at Forrest while Forrest had his eyes looking upwards to Neon, "COME FORREST! JOIN ME IN MY CHRISTMAS TRADITION IN DECORATING THE CHRISTMAS TREE! YOU'RE JUST IN TIEM TO HELP ME LIGHT IT UP AND SING THE RITUAL SONG!"

Forrest then thought about saying something, but he didn't because he was unsure of what Neon was talking about. He even had that worried look return to his face. And as soon as Neon was finished with what he was saying, he then let go of Forrest and walked over to his Christmas tree. That was in the middle of the party shop. But it really wasn't a Christmas tree. Really it was a combination of bodies of humans and ponies that were all still alive, tied up, and some had duct tape over their mouths. They looked like they were beaten to a bloody pulp, some had blood coming out of their mouths. Some were even groaning and moaning in pain and some even had broken arms and legs with bones sticking out of the skin.

And they were all in one big pile too. They all looked like they wanted to die. Not only that, but with some of the human beings inside the pile, some were completely naked as well. And Neon, who had let go of Forrest, was walking towards the pile and giving it one last look. And as Neon was walking towards his Christmas tree, Forrest then had a shocking look on his face, but one of those shocking looks where only the eyes look like they were shocked by everything was felt lifeless.

Forrest then said quietly to himself, "Ohh...how did I not see that?"

And then once Neon was right next to his Christmas tree, he gave a smile and all, and went up to one of the human being that were capture. It was a man who appeared to be in his 40's or so, who was also wearing a black coat and a casual white shirt. He looked like he was a normal human being until one day Neon kidnapped him and tortured him.

Well Neon went up to this man, who was looking like he was trying to breath and say something, Neon ripped the duct tape over his mouth, still with his smile and all.

And once the man had his voice back, he quickly gasped for air, but after he gasped air, he looked over to Forrest in a panic and yelled out, "HELP US!! PLEASE HELP US FOR THE LOVE OF GOD FUCKING HELP US! THIS...THING IS INSANE! WE WERE ALL MINDING OUR BUSINUESS WHEN THIS THING SHOWED UP AND TOOK US HOSTAGE! PLEASE I JUST WANT TO GO HOME TO MY FAMILY! HE TOURTEED US FOR DAYS WITHOUT A BREAK! JUST PLEASE LET US FREE DAMN IT! I DON'T WANT TO DIE! I DON'T WANT TO DIE! I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"

And as soon as the man was finished yelling at the top of his lungs, Neon looked into his eyes, and still having a perfect, big smile across his face, gave him a big ol' slap across the face and said to him in a sort of New Yorker type accident, "Shut Up!"

And then he walked away and went behind the register for a few seconds. And while that happened, Forrest just watched as this all happened. And then as soon as Neon came back from behind the register, Neon was holding a can of gasoline in his mouth and was walking back towards the pile of bodies of both human and ponies that he had just sitting right there. And as soon as the man saw it, he said to himself, "Oh dear god help us!" And then Neon got to work on decorating his Christmas tree by weirdly standing on his two back legs and using his two front hooves and throwing the gasoline everywhere on his tree.

And as he was doing so, Neon then looked slightly back towards Forrest and asked him, "So Forrest, what are you waiting for!? ASK ME! ASK ME!"

Forrest, trying not to get on Neon's bad side, then asked Neon along with having a nervous smile on his face and trying to act cool in front of Neon with what he was doing, "Uhhh…right right right, so Neon...if you could have one gift for Christmas that you have always wanted, what would ask for and why?"

And so Forrest was ready to write down Neon's answer and Neon, as he was continuing with his decorating and shit, said to Forrest, "Let me think about that for a quick second Forrest...hmmmm..."

And as Neon was talking, Neon was moving around the pile of bodies, and keep in mind the bodies were stacked high enough to the point where once Neon was behind the bodies, Forrest couldn't see Neon other than hear his voice.

Anyway, Neon continued to say to Forrest, "Well, what I would want for Christmas is a hippo!"

Forrest then had a confused look on his face, but yet a curious one at that as he had a one eye brow that went high up due to his confusion and he asked Neon, "A hippo? Why a hippo?"

Neon then said to Forrest, "Because I'm going to need one to sacrifice later in order to complete the ritual!"

Forrest, with still his confused look on his face as Neon then said, "The Ritual!"

Forrest then said as he was jotting down neon's wish for Christmas, "Uhhh...ok then..."

And then Forrest was writing the stuff down while was Neon finishing up his decoration of his Christmas tree. And once he was done, Neon threw the gas can aside and out of sight and went back on all fours once more and then got in place. Forrest was finishing jotting down his little note, right when Neon was about to light the Christmas tree and he just stood there and watched as he was powerless to do anything.

And so, Neon, who was right in front of the tree, asked the man, "Ok you go bye bye now."

And then Neon immediately opened his mouth to reveal a match and held it in place and then a little flame appeared, all while Neon was looking a little cute as well, at least the kids would say nowadays anyways.

And as the man saw this, he said out loud, "WAIT, PLEASE!"

But then it was too late as Neon then threw the lit match on to the pile of bodies and the whole thing was quickly engulfed in flames as everyone and everything in it started to scream in pain as they were being burned alive. And as soon as Neon was Finished and was satisfied with looking upon his hard work, he then went back to Forrest, turned around to see this tree, and wrapped his left forearm around Forrest's neck.

He then yelled out to Forrest, "COME FORREST! SING WITH ME THE CHIRSTMAS TREE SONG!!!"

And Forrest then looked towards Neon without moving his head, sort of having his look to the right side of him with shifting his eyes and he then looked back at the Christmas tree as the flames burned the bodies and such. Forrest then had a nervous, more of an embarrassment smile on his face as if he had just gotten caught red handed...hoof…whatever, or something to that degree.

And then Neon started to move left to right gently and Forrest followed suit as Neon then started to sing, "O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree ..."

And then he singed that classical Christmas song throughout the time Forrest was there. And Forrest just played along with it...time for the next scene...I mean place where Forrest went to next...

AT MAC'S PLACE...

And so for the next scene...oh fuck it. For the next scene change, Forrest went to Mac's farm. However, the script called for a sort of time skip thingy so Forrest is already there and told Mac what he was doing there. They are of course outside as Mac is busy trying to do something to his apple trees. What he was trying to do in unclear. But what was happening though was that Mac was standing on his two back legs while he was leaning on the tree itself. And yes, there were apples on the tree, it looked a title bit weird but it was there And also, the apples on the tree looked rotten and looked like they wanted to kill themselves.

Anyway, Forrest was sitting at a little wooden picnic table that was just oddly enough out there in the middle of the apple field, but Mac didn’t even know why it was there in his field sometimes. Well, Forrest was sitting at the table, with his note pad on the table and the pen in his mouth, trying to talk to Mac. Mac was looking up at the tree and was giving an ok expression across his face.

And so Forrest asked Mac, "So if you could have anything for Christmas, what would it be?"

And then Mac, who was still leaning against the tree, made a thinking face, you know, where you have your eyes rolled back and your hand...or in this case hoof...on your chin and you go 'hhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmm'. Hhhhhmmmmmm...

And Mac thought about his answer for a little bit. But then he thought of one and quickly looked towards Forrest and he then had a sort of confident look on his face as he then said to Forrest with his usual southern accent, "I would wish for a cross bow. A good cross bow so I could aim at Applejack's head and save everypony from tyranny."

Forrest, who still had a smile and was not taken aback from Mac’s answer, then went and said, "A cross bow...got it.."

And Forrest proceeded to write down Mac's wish and why.

AT ARRELL'S PLACE...

And so for the next place where Forrest went to, it was Arrell's place. Of course it was a bit of a way's out of Stalia, but as usual not too far for Forrest. Well Forrest was near Arrell’s shed as Arrell was bringing something into the shed with him and he looked a little depressed and a little down in the dumps. Forrest was standing with the notepad in hoof and the pen of course in his mouth.

Forrest then asked Arrell, "So what would you wish for?"

Arrell, as he was halfway through the door, "Cologne"

Arrell of course stopped halfway through the door and looking at Forrest. Forrest then said to Arrell with a bit of a smirk on his face, "Ahhh...I get it. You want to catch those mares' attention don't you?"

Arrell then said, "No, I mean cologne of a Rabbid Frog from the Everfree Forrest. You get it from its piss."

Forrest then had a shocking look, but also a confused look as well. He then asked Arrell, "But why though?"

Arrell then said, "It's so I can attract other animals that I could maybe force other animals to breed with...forcefully..."

Forrest then said as he jotted down his little notes, "A Cologne from the Rabbid Frog...got it…"

And as soon as Forrest was finished with what he was writing down, he then looked at Arrell with his usual smile and both stared at each other in silence for a few seconds.

And then Arrell broke that silence and said to him, "Stay out of my shed."

And then Arrell quickly forward inside his shed and slammed the door, in which case Forrest had a surprised look on his face.

AT JACK'S HOME

And so, the last place that Forrest had to visit was Classy Jack's home. And his home was also his place of business. Yup, Jack is...classy that way...I guess. Anyways, once more, Forrest was already there, knocked on his door, got threatened by Jack if it was his little brother, which it wasn't, and he let him in. And then they both sat at the kitchen table and just like Arrell, Jack had an ok look on his face while Forrest remains with his usual hopeful looking face. Anyway, Forrest was at the table, with the note pad on the flat surface and the pen in his mouth, ready for Jack to give him his answer that he was looking for.

Forrest then asked Jack, "So, what would you wish for if you still gave a flying buck about Christmas Jack?"

Classy Jack then looked at Forrest in the eyes and told him without changing any expression on his face, "A rare piece of Jewelry. Also you're a faggot for saying 'buck'. You could have at least have said 'fook' and be less gay, but you didn't…you fucking...wanker piece of shit. Also...why are you asking me what I would wish for Christmas?"

And with that said, Forrest was taken aback, shocked to the core as his mouth was left agape and then the pen that he held in his mouth fell out, with his eyes wide. He wasn't socked because Jack insulted him, no that happened every day. Instead he was taken aback by Jack getting suspicious of him. Sure he was keeping his cool with me, but he knows that Jack is smarter than me when it comes to these kinds of things.

But Forrest quickly shook his head back and forth quickly and then changed his shocked expression into an expression that showed that he was lying about something but was trying to cover it up with a nervous smiles and a little bit of sweating.

Forrest said to Jack, "What!? No...I'm not trying to ask you guys what you want Christmas and buy you these gifts for Christmas? Why would I ever do such thing after what you said to me at the bar yesterday? He he..."

And with that little laugh he gave off at the end, Forrest became even more nervous, but of course Jack could see through Forrest's lie as he still had his ok expression on his face. Better yet it was his asshole look you could say where he looks normal but really he'll go full asshole at any second. Anyways, he had an asshole look on his face but raised one of his eye brows up, pretty much saying, 'You're caught red handed mother fucker. You're done. Time to go to prison where Bubba is going to get right behind you...and give you a nice back massage...and then he'll stick his dick in ya...' Yeah...that kind of look.

Anyways, after Forrest tried to lie his way out, Jack then said, "Not only are you a faggot, but you're a terrible liar as well."

And with that said, Forrest immediately 'deflated' as he sort of laid back in his chair, no longer had a smile on his face and instead traded for a sad, disappointed, down in the dumps kind of face, and his arms hanging low.

He then gave a slight sigh and said to Jack, "You caught me red hoofed Jack."

Jack then said, while giving a curious look to his face, "What were you doing this for anyway?"

Forrest then said, while hanging his head low due to his huge failure of trying to keep what he was doing a secret, "I was trying to figure out what you guys would want for as a Christmas gift. Then I would have gone out of my way to get those gifts and THROW a HUGE party for all of us for Christmas later tonight. And I thought that we would get to play games, laugh, tell jokes, and just have fun and celebrate the holiday all together...as friends."

And as Forrest was saying this, he was making gestures with his hooves and moving it up and town and the like to imply what he saying. And towards the end he had laid his head float down on the table while Jack was following along, especially with his eyes.

So with that being said, Forrest got his head off the table, but continued to let it hang real low, and said in a disappointing tone, "I guess you're going to tell the other guys and make fun of me or something...huh?"

Jack then said in his response while having wide eyes and a little smile on his face, "What? No! I want help you Forrest!"

And with those words entering Forrest’s ears, he had a late reaction so he then said, "Ok then...I guess I'll.."

And in that moment, Forrest's head propped up straight with a shocked face and all and he was surprised by it as he said, "Wait what?"

Jack then said, as he leaned a little forward towards onto the table to get a little closer to Forrest to make his point while moving his hooves a little bit, "You heard me Forrest. I want to come along to help you out too."

He even said it all with a smile and with a little bit of hope on his face. Forrest then asked Jack, with a confused but curious look on his face, "But...you're Classy Jack. You're an asshole and always make fun of me for everything that I do! Why would you want to help me all of a sudden?"

Jack then defended himself, with sitting back straight in his seat and making some more hoof gestures and such as well as having his right hoof go to his chest a little but, "Oh come on Forrest. Even we assholes have to take a bit of a break from being an asshole sometimes. Even us assholes have a heart you know?"

Jack even closed his eyes a little bit as well, showing some confidence in his words. And after what Jack had said to Forrest, Forrest started to gain a little bit of hope back. Actually scratch that, Forrest started to gain A LOT of hope back as his head moved forward and his body started to lean on the table with his hooves firmly planted on the table itself.

Forrest then said with a glimmer in his eyes and said to Jack, "Really? You mean that Jack?"

Jack then said, "Sure...just as long as you get me that present you asked me about."

Jack had said that with a bit of a teasing tone all with a smile on his face with eyes being closed. Forrest then said out loud, "OH HAPPY DAYS AHREAD OF ME! I CAN'T WAITTO GET STARTED!!!"

Forrest had said that as he raised his hooves into the air while still maintaining some sort of balance. He even had wide, big eyes with a shimmer, glimmer sparkling through his eyes, showing that he had hope and optimism fill his heart with pure glee. And then...a montage happened...both within the script and what happened on set...don't ask...

MONTAGE...

And so a montage happened, and with no words too so I only have write down what happened in my own words and create what they call "Imagery" for you people...alright let's begin. And just for the record, the script was...a bit weird when it came to this bit, so just be thankful this was all that happened on set. So where do I start with one of these...montages? Well, I suppose what happened was that they first went to the store.

And as they were on their journey, collecting the items that they sought after for, they had smiles on their faces, big smiles I should add, as they were out together both as friends collecting the stuff. So they went to a store first, just a general store. And at this store they sold various Christmas items for decorations and what not. Along with some Christmas related food too like fruit cake and...Whatever egg nog is made out of…it's made out of people isn't it? It's made out of the juice of the unborn fetus isn't it?

Fucking knew it. Anyway, Forrest was pushing a cart around the store, with a big smile and all, and eyed an assortment of silver bells. So he went ahead, grabbed one with his hoof and put it in the cart. As for Jack, he was close by within Forrest’s field of vision and he had various items for the Christmas party in his cart. And he too of course, like I stated before, had a big smile on his face. He even looked at Forrest and gave him a slight wink with his right eye.

And off to the next place where they then headed was into the liquor store, but in the clouds. Basically their next item on the list was Wolf's very much requested Cloud Beer. I have no idea what it is, but I'm sure it's something. Anyways, Forrest had just picked up a case of cloud beer and walked to the checkout counter. He had a nervous smile on his face and was sweating a little bit. And behind the counter stood a guy of q tall and big size with side burns and all. He looked like someone not to be messed with all with thick eye brows and a pissed off look.

And once Forrest put the cloud beer on the counter to be checked out, the cashier pointed a sign right next to him that read 'YOU MUST BE 21 OR OVER TO PURCAHSE ALCHOAL! NO MINORS OR ZEBRAS ALLOWED TO PURCHASE ALCHOAL.'

And so Forrest then took out an id out of his little bag thing and gave it to the cashier. And when the cashier took it, he then gave it a close look into it. And it was a fake ID. Yeah...apparently Forrest isn't 21, ...apparently he' 15...who would have thought? No seriously he is...he's like the youngest one out of all of us and he's just been getting away with it as well drinking beer at the bar for like years. I mean I'm more surprised than you are right now. But apparently the other guys are like 17-ish or so in age. Yeah...weird...but ok, but the thing to note is…Ponies here are at adult age round 16 or so, so by Equestria standards, we can fuck whatever mare we want as long as it under 16.

Just as long as we’re not in the US, but Forrest…he’s still a borderline minor. Although Wolf is like…23 I think, last time I checked anyways. So, the ID looked obviously fake as a picture of Forrest was poorly glued on to another person's picture and stuff was written in marker about his age and such. And then of course the cashier looked back and forth between Forrest and the fake ID, and then he gave a big smile like Jack and Forrest and believed it was real.

And then he pressed a button on the register and rung him up. And so Forrest then looked back to him where Jack had his face pressed against the window, looking at him and seeing how everything was going. Jack then gave a wink towards Forrest and Forrest gave a wink back.

And so the next stop was back on the ground in Stalia, for they were now tasked to find and retrieve a hippo for Neon. And he was a big hippo too and was just in the middle of Stalia.

And the fact that there was a big ol' fucking hippo in the middle of the town was amazing, as it was never before seen and...Ok I'm just fucking with y'all. It was actually a tiny hippo. Yes those exist back in Equestria, where there are just tiny hippos. There are usually some bigger hippos of course but...it was just a tiny hippo walking down in the middle of the street, minding its own business like a bug.

And it had its mouth opened as it was yawning and such and it was walking down the street somewhat slowly. And Jack and Forrest were between it, looking down at it. They looked at each other, gave sort of a half confused look with their left eye brows raised up high and then they both shrugged, pretty much saying, 'Well that's weird, but we can roll with it I guess.' And then Forrest took the tiny hippo and ran.

And now for the cross bow as that was the next item on the list. They both went into a weapons store, and by this point in time, they were starting to sell guns too...who would have thought...right? Well anyways, they walked in; everything was nice and wooden like for whatever odd reason. And the guy behind the counter was waiting for them to select a purchase of some kind. But instead Jack and Forrest went up to the counter and Jack pointed to a crossbow that would have been perfect for Mac. And of course Jack had a smile and all.

So the guy behind the counter, who looked like a normal stallion of sorts, looked behind him to see a picture with a sign that said, 'DO NOT SELL TO THESE PONIES. THEY ARE CONSIDERED DANGEROUS!!!'

And then he looked down at the long line of pictures and it included that horney bee mare, some drugged up hobo, a picture of Mac, and a picture of Classy Jack. But then the stallion behind the counter looked back, made a thinking face, and then immediately grabbed the cross bow that was hanging on the wall. And he did so with a big smile on his face.

And he then handed it over to Jack and he then grabbed it, held it in the hair with both of his hooves as if it was some sort of trophy to him, looked over to Forrest and they both in unison winked at each other with a smile and all.

And so the penultimate place comes up next where they went to get that weird animal cologne thing for Arrell. They were in the swamp part of the Everfree Forest that was near Stalia.

And the Rabbid Frog was just sitting in the middle of some shallow filled swamp water and the Rabbid Frog was all red and stuff and looked like it had problems...scary problems... It had weird bug eyes and it looked kind of poisonous if not careful around it. It even had some thorns sticking out of its back. But Forrest and Jack was behind it and front of it. Jack was behind and Forrest in front of it. Forrest was holding a jar while Jack went ahead and grabbed the frog, turned it around and Forrest jammed a stick inside of its asshole and then pee came out of it.

And they also had cloth pins on their noses to protect their nostrils from the musky smell from the Rabbid Frog's pee. And then once the jar was filled with the awful pee, Forrest put a lid on it and sealed it tight. And then Jack let it go and they were both smiling through. And as soon as the Rabbid Frog was let go of, they both gave each other a hoof five...high five...whatever...and winked both at each other.

And so for the final stop, Jack's wish, which was a piece of jewelry...a jewel. Maybe it was rare...maybe it was not...maybe some zebras died over it. Who knows? What matters is that it's a thing everyone wants it and it had a high value placed on it.

Anyways, they went to a jewelry store that was in town. The whole place was all nice and classy and stuff, pretty much would fit Classy Jack's look and stuff. And there was an old stallion with a pair of rounded glasses and a nice bow tie suit, waiting patiently for some customers to waltz on in and buy something. He seemed like a nice pony too.

And then Jack and Forrest came breaking in through the door, while they had ski-mask over their faces while jack was holding a gun somehow. And Forrest was holding a light brown colored back...that DIDN'T have the dollar sign on it...ha...can't be sued now...and Jack basically held up the guy selling the stuff.

The old stallion of course held his hooves up somehow and Jack went ahead, broke through the glass that was protecting the jewelry, as it always is in these cases, and took the jewel that he laid eyes on and put in the bag. And he then shot the old stallion and they then made a run for it, all by breaking through one of the glass windows of the store. And that was about it…no smiling…just death and despair.

And so, that pretty much ends it for the montage as they went and finished gathering everything that they needed.

Of course Forrest was going to back to his home and he was flying somewhat gently in the air, having a peace of mind. And Jack was following too as he was sitting on a cloud that Forrest was able to drag along with. And you know...Jack knew the spell for him to be able to stand on a cloud and what not. Well anyways, both Forrest and Jack had smiles on their faces and Forrest was happy as he could be. Nothing could go wrong as he had it in his mind. and then Jack swiftly, but surely, gave Forrest a big push, almost as if he was hitting him, and pushed him out of the sky. What an aaaaaaaaassshooooolllleeee...

Anyways, Forrest, right after Jack had pushed him out of the sky, fell hard to ground as it was all unexpected and it was from the back as well as making Forrest lose his balance. It was all silent too as well except for the part where crashed towards the ground. And so Forrest of course landed on the ground hard too as once he crashed into the ground, he tumbled and rolled over and pretty much got himself banged up pretty badly.

By the time he stopped tumbling and rolling and such, he had a lot of bruises, it looked like some of his teeth fell out, he had a black eye, and he just looked miserable. And as for the stuff that he had in his hands, it just so happened to fall into a fire that was nearby.

Yes, a classic trash can fire where the hobos go and try and keep warm. Well the stuff fell in there...and yes...even the tiny hippo got engulfed by the flames as it died screaming in pain. This is what it sounded like...

And the tiny hippos sounded like that while it was being burned alive slowly. But don't worry, that species is still around...somewhere in Stalia that is...I think. But the poor tiny hippo... Anyways, as soon as that happened, Jack was having a little smile on his face, pretty much proud of what he had done just then.

As for Forrest, he sort of half looked up towards Jack, who was above him on that cloud thingy, but not too far, and asked him, "Why did you do that Jack? I thought we were bonding as friends?"

Jack then gave Forrest, even though he couldn't see it, a look that said he was confused a little bit. In other words, one of his eye brows were up and his two hooves were up in the air as well to show a little bit of motion with his hooves.

Jack then said, "I'm an asshole Forrest. That’s my character! What did you expect?"

And then Forrest, as he raised his right hoof up a little bit, "Character development?"

Jack then went back to his ok look...or asshole look as from before, although with a tad bit more expression than usual and said to Forrest, "What are you...fucking retarded!? Of course I'm not allowed to have any character development...at least not yet that is. I don't know, I'm still trying to work it out with the producers, they want me to sign a contract, and they want to also have my soul. And I thought I was the asshole."

Forrest then said, while still raising his right hoof up, "Well...can you at least help me get up?"

Jack then put his left hoof to his chin, titled his head upwards a bit, and rolled his eyes a bit backwards and said to him, "Huh...let me think about that for a minute uhhh...NO! FUCK YOU! HA HA HA HA... FAGGOT!"

And as Jack said those last words to Forrest, Jack leapt off the cloud and went back to his business of being an asshole. And then the cloud floated back up to join with the other clouds...I guess. And Forrest was left there, on the ground with snow nearby so it a bit extra cold and everything, despite him having his winter cloths and everything.

And as his mangled body was lying there, Forrest then said to himself, "Well...I suppose since its noon, I can get up and get everything fixed before tonight. Just as long as it doesn't cut to commercial brea..."

HEEEEEEEY KIIIIIIIIIIDS!!! It’s your good ol’ buddy ol’ pal WAKKO THE CLOWN AGAIN! This time I’m here to send you all a happy holiday message! And I said Holidays because we can’t let the Jews Win! Well as you can see here, I just broke into this family’s home and AXED them a question if they are having a great holiday season with WAKKO THE CLOWN! WAKKO THE CLOWN! WAKKO THE CLOWN!!! They said YEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!! And they are sure smiling and having a good ol’ gay time as I shoved a little AX into their skulls, even the KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDS WERE HAPPY WHEN THEY SAW WAKKO THE CLOWN! WAKKO THE CLOWN!! WAKKO THE CLOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWNNNN!!! Even their pet doggy is having a fun time this season, he really seems to like THE OVEN a lot! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

It’s always a fun time when WAKKO THE CLOWN IS AROUND!!! So remember kids, you better unlock those doors so WAKKO THE CLOWN! WAKKO THE C LOWN!! WAKKO THE CLOWN!!! Can come into your home and SPREAD Holiday cheer to all of your family members!!! I’ve got balloons, presents, Bimmy the Bomb, Edgy the Knives, Bas the Gas, my pet Chinny the Chainsaw, and Axiom the Demon that I called upon in a blood sacrifice ritual the other day! And always remember kids, look at the moon…look at the moon. Look at the moon! Look at the moon!! Look at the moon!!!

LOOK AT THE MOON! LOOK AT THE MOON!! LOOK AT THE MOON!!! LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHE…

Uh oh…do you hear that kids? Police Sirens! Looks like that’s my cue to get the fuck out of here! Well, I’ll see you around kiddos….

LOOKATTHEMOON!!!

Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas, and that’s right little boys and girls, I said Christmas! I’m not being naughty because the Jews are wrong! Well, I’m ol’ St. Nick here, to tell you to have a Merry Christmas this year! And…I have a little special surprise, but shhhhh…don’t tell your parents about it though as it’s just a little secret between you and me. I’ve got a little special message to tell you, and all you have to do is call, 1-800-FUCK MY ASS-6969, and I’ll talk to you, right on the telephone too.

And we can just…talk…we can talk about what you want ol’ Santa Claus to bring you this Christmas season. You can tell me all the good things you’ve done this year. And you can even tell me all of the…naughty, things that you’ve done this year. Especially the naughty things. It’s alright, don’t be afraid to call up Santa Claus and tell me all the NAUGHTY things that you’ve done all of this year.

I won’t tell your parents. I won’t even tell another soul…it’ll just be between you and me. In fact, I’ll give you a special little gift under the tree and stocking this year if you do tell me all of the NAUGHTY little things you’ve done this year little boys and girls…just give old Santa here sometime to prepare with the lotion and tissues.

*Santa licks and smacks his lips sexually*

Oh look, it sounds like one of you wants to tell me how NAUGHTY you were this year. Well, let’s pick up the phone and let’s find out then…ho ho ho!!!

Ho Ho Ho..and Merry Christmas, do you want to tell me your name little boy?

“My name is Billy. How did you know I was a boy?”

Why, Santa always knows…and the sound of your breath [small]…

*Santa licks lips aggressively*

So Billy, how old are you?

“I’m…I’m 6 years old.

And tell me Billy, what would you like for Christmas this year?

“I want a…I want a toy truck this year!!!

Ho ho ho…that sounds delightful Billy!!! So uhhh…what are you wearing?”

“I’m wearing uhhhh….”

“Billy…Billy who are you talking to!?”

“I’m Talking to Santa Claus mommy! Santa told me to do so on the TV screen! Do you want to talk to Santa mommy?”

“BILLY, GET OFF THE PHONE THIS INSTANT! GET ME THE PHONE AND GO TO YOUR ROOM! “

…

“YOU STAY AWAY FROM MY FAMILY YOU HEAR! STOP CALLING OUR HOUSE! WE HAVE ALREADY FILED A REPORT WITH THE POLICE AND IF YOU COME ANY WHERE NEAR OUR SON, MY HUSBAND WILL SHOOT YOU ON SIGHT!!! NOW STOP CALLING OUR HOME AND LEAVE US ALONE!!!”

…

Well then…it sounds like they don’t want innocent St. Nick near their children…too bad a certain someone knows where they hide the spare key at….he he…he he he he…ha ha ha, Ha Ha H a Ha, HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAA HAAAAAAAAAAAA! HA HA AH OH HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO!...ho ho ho...MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL BOYS AND GIRLS! I’LL BE WAITING FOR YOUR CALLS NOW, SO DON’T DISAPPOINT OR ELSE YOU’LL GET COAL THIS CHRISTMAS UP YOUR STOCKING…

*Santa makes slurping sounds with his mouth and anus*

This holiday season, go see the movie The Little Green Wrinch! “Oh gee I hate Christmas.” It’s all about a little green midget boy that hates the holiday season! “Ehhh…I fucking hate Christmas.” “Fuck Christmas.” “I don’t want anyone to be happy so I’m going to ruin it for everyone else mmmkay…” The Little Green Wrinch hates the holidays so much that he tries to take it away from everyone else! “Ehhhh...I’m going to dress up like Santa Claus and be an asshole to everybody.” And so he goes around, stealing all the presents! Oh no! “Ehhh...I don’t have a heart.” But then The Little Green Wrinch learns the true meaning of the holiday season. “Ehhh...I guess I have a heart now…ehhhh…” And so he grows a heart on the inside and gives everyone’s holiday back! “Ehhh…here’s all your stuff back. Gee whiz, I’m sure am sorry for acting like a douchebag to you all. I wish you all a merry C*******s to you all…except for the Jews, get out of my house damn it…get the fuck out of my house now…” It’s fun for the whole family! Critics say it’s the best Syncro-vox animated movie of all time. The Little Green Wrinch, go see it a theatre near you. “Ehhh fuck you little boy…”

*The little green Wrinch hits a kid…*

Rated PG-13...

And now a message from the Grease Boi…

"It is dark, with an open, spacious room, all with one light that barely lights up one spot in the room. And then comes out from the shadows is a figure. And the figure comes closer and closer until it reaches the light. And what comes into the light is a scrawny old man that is covered in grease. He has man tits that are saggy with a belly that perturbed outwards. And his big, old man slong hung out as well and it looked like a weird, horrifying unidentified creature of some sort. But the old man had a bit of hair left, grey hair that looked like it was a mess and wasn't combed, along with a big bald spot on the middle of his head. And as for his face, he looks old, with wrinkles all around his face and eyes."

Hi…it’s me...the Grease Boi, America’s sweetheart. *cough* I am here today to tell you all, even the Jews, to have a Merry Christmas or Hanukkah! Except for the blacks, you can go fuck yourselves…Kwanza my asshole… I want to let you know, that the Grease Boi loves all of you, even the dirty Mexicans. But not the dirty sand people though.

And that, this Christmas season, we should all put our differences aside, except for nuclear war, and have a peaceful Christmas this season. It is important to do this to teach our kids, even the autistic ones, but not the mentally retarded ones, that we need to all work together, except with the dirty France, we need to burn them, and bring world peace. Except for Malaysia, we need to nuke it. Our kids are growing up in dark times right now, so for the birth of Babu Jebus’s sake, let’s do him all a favor and hang all the Canadians. We should also try and get rid of Israel too, those mother fuckers ripped me off when I went there for mother’s daughter’s cousin’s, third uncle’s fifth aunt’s birthday at their dirty Chucky Cheeses.

It wasn’t even a good Chucky Cheeses. The giant rat didn’t want to eat the green cheese that I was saving in my pocket for the past twelve months so I could give it to a rat. So I shot him and then I was politely asked to leave…that’s when a Jew robbed me. So this Christmas, do the right thing…and kill anyone that doesn’t like pizza rolls because those are the true monsters in our society. So, have a Merry Christmas, and have a happy new year. Now why don’t you come back to bed honey...

…

Come on, come back to bed with me. I know you want to fix me breakfast, but we can just lie in my bed and enjoy each other’s company as I breathe down your neck and whisper that I want to make sweet love to you, specifically in your left ear. So why don’t you come back to bed with me dear? Hold on, I feel a little dry…

"The old man then proceeds to grab a big tub of grease that is sitting right next to him. He then takes his hands and dips it into the grease to get a good feeling of the slimy, yellow, stench filled grease with his big, bare, old man hands. And then the old man proceeds to scoop up a ton of grease, as the crease drips from his hands. And then after taking a good look at the grease with his mouth a little wide open, the old then slathers the grease all over his body, but also proceeds to concentrate on the nipples that remain on his old man tits. And as he slathers the grease all over his body, he takes his hands and raises them up just a little bit so only his index finger and middle finger are the only things touching his glistening, grease covered body. And then the old man takes the grease and pushes it over to his old man nipples, where he then proceeds to rub it into tiny circles around his old man nipples"

Oh yeah…that’s the stuff. My lips are a little dry too, let me get them moist.

"The old man then proceeds to start, but slowly licking his lips. His tongue slowly peeks out of his mouth, almost as if the old man is uncertain if this is what he wants to do. But this is what he lives for. This is his reason for existing. So the old man sticks his tongue out a little bit further outwards and then proceeds to lick his entire lips in a counter clockwise motion. He slowly licks his lips, giving it moisture so it doesn't go dry."

Oh yeah baby…ok camera guy, let me touch your nipples…

…

Come on over here, I want to touch your nipples.

…

Come over here now before I send you back to the ram ranch god damn it.

Well that was a weird commercial break. I was waiting to see the commercial for the Big Chunky O’s cereal to come out…guess they don’t want to play the ad. Well, where did we leave off, oh yeah, that’s right? So basically saying, since there was a commercial break, several hours has passed since Forrest was pushed from the sky by Jack, and that basically means Forrest has a lot less time to regather everything that he has lost. And that means with what little there is left, because it is winter after all, it’s about to become a lot less bright outside, and the sun wasn’t out that much to begin with even.

So with that being said, several hours have passed and during those hours, Forrest was trying to pull himself together. It took him a while, but once he got up, he didn’t look happy anymore. Instead, he just looked like he his sad, usual self from when he was at the bar. But at the very least, he didn’t look as much in bad shape, almost as if a scene change magically healed all of his wounds…and that’s just the magic of TV for you. Well, anyways, Forrest was brushing himself off as there was still some dirt left on him and his winter clothes from when Jack pushed him down to the ground and rolled all over in the dirt with a tad bit of snow attached to it.

But once he got back up, he still had his little white bag thing that he had been carrying with him this entire time. Once Forrest was done however, he then looked up towards the sky with worry, seeing how much light there was left in the day. He saw how little it was as it was fading away from the sky and into Luna’s goodnight. And it made Forrest worry a lot. But then he thought he’d check on the time, and so he looked by to see if there were any nearby buildings that had a clock. And sure enough, there was a big ol’ clock nearby that was in the window of a nearby shop.

So Forrest turned to look at it, while gritting his teeth, prepared to see what time it was. And when he did, he saw that the time was 4 o’ clock. And once Forrest saw the time, he was exceedingly worried. He even hung his head in shame a little as he was embarrassed how much time he had lost. There was very little time left in the day before Christmas Day, and he only had so much time left. He was sad that so much time had passed him by and part of him in his mind and heart just wanted to give up right then and there.

But in his heart knew that he had to keep going, but it was worrying to see how much time was left on the clock. Forrest eventually raised his head up, and with the exception of the nearby hobos, he was the only one around.

So Forrest ended up saying to himself, “Ohhhhhh…why didn't I just put the stuff in my bag? Well…maybe it would have still gotten damaged, but still. I’m such an idiot. I let the thought that Jack was trying to actually help and a montage get the better of me. And there’s only so much time left! I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it in time!”

Forrest had a look of despair on his face when he had said that to himself, but he then quickly shook his head left to right in a frequent pace and then after he did that, he had a slight smile on his face, but with still a hint of worry in his eyes as he said to himself, “Relax Forrest. I’ll be able to make it in time. I just got to get everything all over again and all without the help of Jack. Surely I can gather all the items before midnight tonight. Heck, I’ll have it all within an hour or two, just you wait…I’ll throw my friends a Christmas party like they have never seen before. I’ll throw one harder than Pinkie Pie even. And the look on their faces when I give them their gifts, it’ll be so exciting. I mean…how hard can it be…riiiiight? He he he he he…he…”

7.5 HOURS LEFT

And so Forrest was off to his first stop to try and collect the items that he had lost before. His first stop was the jewelry shop. However it took him thirty minutes just to find the store since he was far away from the place from where he started off at.

And so he found it and flew there by transportation of his wings. He even had a bit of hope on his face with a smile. But once he got there, he then started to become a little worried on the inside and out, as that smile of hope quickly disappeared as he saw that the store that sold the jewelry was all messed up with broken glass everywhere and such.

When Forrest saw this from the air, he said to himself as his smile disappeared, “Oh no.”

And so he quickly flew down and tried to be careful of the broken glass everywhere. No one else was around, as usually someone when something like this happens, someone would be investigating the incident. But no one, not even an authority figure was around. But then again Stalia doesn’t really have law enforcement to begin with so...pfft… With the store, there was one big opening as Forrest saw, in one of the windows that used to be there. As for the door, it was still there, almost as if it went untouched. As for the glass, it was all over on the ground on the outside, with a little bit of it on the inside of the store as well.

Anyway, Forrest looked inside, at least as far as he could do so and said as he moved his head a little bit up and down, “Hello!? Is anypony in there!? Is anypony ok!?”

Forrest then waited for a response, but there was only silence. Forrest just stared into the empty jewelry shop and then gave himself a slight sigh as he tried to think of something. ‘Oh…what do I do? I can’t waste any time, but look what happened here. This is a mess! What if somepony is hurt!? What if I get in trouble!? But I can’t stand here and complain all day. I’ve got to do something!’

And so as Forrest remained worried as he could be, Forrest gave a sad little grunt, looked down, and stared at the broken glass ahead of him.

Forrest then returned to looking back up and seeing the opening into the jewelry store and he then thought to himself, ‘Well…there’s only one thing that I can do if I want to still do that party…I just hope I’m careful.’

And so Forrest decided to go into the store, while also preparing for any pain that he might feel from stepping on the small, broken pieces of glass. And so he then took his first and the sound of crunching could be heard as his hooves crushed against the piece of glasses.

As Forrest's first stepped on to the glass, he then said quietly to himself, “Ow”.

And then he tried walk forward, although it wasn’t really walking. Really, it was sort of taking big steps or leaps forward so as to limit the amount of steps that he needed to take in order to get into the jewelry building.

And as he was doing so he constantly said, “Ow, ow, ow , ow, ow, ow , ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,” with every step that he took, he said ‘ow’.

Eventually he made it into the store and once he did, he didn’t have to step onto the broken pieces of glass anymore. That relieved Forrest a little bit, but it wasn’t enough to put a smile on his face. Instead, it just made him more worried as he raised one of his hooves up see if there was any damaged done to the bottom of his hooves. Thankfully only minor cuts and bruises were made when he did step on the glass.

However he still had maybe a couple of pieces of glass stuck in it and it was still painful for him nonetheless, but still, it's better than what it could have been for him in the end. But once he put his hoof back down on the ground, he then looked upward to be greeted with a dead body of an old stallion that looked like he got shot.

Forrest was then confused and worried, but then he thought about it for a few seconds and then he came to the stark realization, ‘Oh right…Me and Jack robbed the place.’

Forrest however, finally got a chance to take a good look around the jewelry store considering when he and Jack came breaking through, he had only a few seconds to take a good look at the place. He didn’t exactly have that kind of bits to be going into jewelry stores every so often if you know what I mean to know what it all looked inside. So it was interesting to see what the inside of the place looked like.

All of the walls and the floor were made out of white marble, while the place was filled with shiny and sparkling jewelry that looked like they were some of the rarest material of them all…even though not so much, but still. That or a Zebra died for it and the jewelry is haunted, either way it looked nice. And all the display cases that the jewelry was housed in and to be showed off looked like they were just as rare as the jewelry themselves. And the walls were lined with shelves of necklaces and rings and diamonds. It all looked very nice and expensive.

And above Forrest, there was a chandler that was made out of rare jewels as well. It was quite the fancy place, that was for sure. Oh and of course there was a rotting dead corpse in front of Forrest, an always nice addition to a jewelry store. In fact if you ever have a rotten dead corpse added to your home, the value of the price for it will go way up. Because then the rat people can come out and they have the cash if you know what I’m saying. So anyways, Forrest looked around, with still a worried look on his face, as he was trying to think of a solution to his problem. He still needed a gift for Jack even though he stabbed him in the back.

So he thought to himself, ‘Oh what am I going to do? The place is a mess, the jewel that we took is gone, and the pony behind the counter is dead. And it wouldn’t be exactly right to steal from a place of business. Stealing is never wrong. Then again…I am sort of desperate…and the owner here isn’t exactly alive to receive any form of payments.’

So Forrest looked down and saw that some diamonds had scattered around the place after when Jack broke into one of the display cases from earlier. So Forrest was a bit cautious and a bit hesitant, but he picked one of the diamonds up and looked at it.

It wasn’t big, it wasn’t that fancy either. But it was a real diamonds and it was a nice blue colored one as well. The only problem was it was small, like small like a pebble.

But Forrest was feeling bad enough from taking anything from a dead pony already, so he just held the small blue diamond with his hoof carefully and said to himself, “Well…it isn’t exactly what Jack had wanted…but it’s the thought that counts…right?”

At that last part, Forrest had a little bit of a hopeful smile form on his face, almost as if he believed he was going to make it to the end and see the Christmas party through. So Forrest opened up his little white saddle back and put the blue diamond in it and then took out some bits, all with still a little smile on his face. He then took a few bits out and placed it on the counter that was near the rotting corpse, as if he was paying for the diamond itself.

However, Forrest then said as his little smile disappeared back into a sad looking one, “This is all I can afford for this diamond. I’m sorry that we came in here and wrecked your store..and that my friend Jack killed you…and sort of left you for dead without saying we’re sorry. But I’m sure Jack is feeling really guilty about it by now. But…even though you’re dead and we didn’t really know you so I can’t say for sure if Jack has any feelings about this…I’m still sorry about it. The bits isn’t much…and you’re sure can't use it now…but hopefully this puts you at peace good sir. Well…bye…hopefully you went to other side and are at peace. Bye…”

And then Forrest, as the kind and gentle soul at he was, left the store the way that he came…through the fucking glass.

And of course, he kept saying , “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,” every time he stepped on some glass.

6.5 HOURS LEFT

So the next stop on Forrest's list was to retrieve the cloud beer that he had lost before. It took him an hour to reach the liquor store as the place was located only where Pegasus could reach, and it wasn't exactly a place that every pegasus could go to either since it was a place where alchoaly was sold. So it took Forrest a little bit, but when he did made it, it was a small, competent, liquor store sitting on top of some clouds overlooking a field of some sort that was nearby Stalia. And the place looked like any other convenience store, so there was nothing special about it.

However there was a bright big neon sign that wasn’t quite lit up yet, but was going to at some point clearly, named: RED’S BIG LETTER.

That was basically the name of the local Pegasus alcohol store for Stalia. So Forrest, who was in a hurry, wasted no time and entered the facility. And when he did, the place used a single person…pony...whatever…door where you have to either push or pull. In Forrest's case he had to pull and when he did, there was a little bell that rung to notify the cashier that a customer had entered the building. And as before, it was the same guy who had hairy side burns and the mean look in his eyes along with a thick set of eye brows.

He was the first thing that Forrest saw and when the cashier saw Forrest entered, he just gave Forrest a deep, dark, cold stare right into Forrest’s eyes. And as for Forrest, he gulped a little bit as he felt a little intimidated by the stallion. However he also got to take a better look at the store and the pony behind the register as he was worried that he would get caught with his fake ID the last time he was in there.

As for what the place looked like, it was a normal, convenience store set up. You had shelves upon shelves filled with all kinds of alcohol from rum to whiskey to vodka to even some weird stuff made by the Zebras that was hard to come by. And behind the counter they even sold some cigars and cigarettes, and not the cheap stuff either.

And in one of the corners of the store, Forrest even spotted a magazine rack filed with dirty magazines with pictures of mares showing off their pussies and some weren’t even shaved. I now it was weird. And of course there was a magazine called Playcolt…ha ha ha, you get the pun, now moving on. And there was a little section dedicated to some bags of cheap chips in case someone happened to catch the munchies.

But other than that, that was it other some of the walls that weren’t covered in alcohol were just pictures for advertisements for other brands' of alcohol. And as for the stallion behind the register, the only detail that Forrest seemed to have picked up right then and there was that he was a bit fat, but strong and someone you don’t want to fuck with, had a yellow-golden ish kind of color to his coat, and wore a green apron for some reason. He even wore a green little hat that looked like it was from France.

And he had also had an orange colored hair for his mane as well.

And Forrest noticed all of this, but of course the cashier noticed he was just standing there so he sort of half yelled at Forrest in a weird Scottish accent, “Are you just going to stand there or what!? I don’t have all day you know?”

Forrest then gave a little nervous smile and said, “Right…sorry about that. He he he…”

However the cashier was unamused by Forrest's attempt at an apology and just continued to give him a cold, hard stare…deep into his soul. So Forrest kept on his fake smile and gave one last gulp and after he did that, he moved into the freezer section of the place where they kept the cold stuff. Forrest took his time, found the special cloud beer, and grabbed a six pack with his mouth, that was the can kind, while trying to maintain that fake smile of his and brought it forth to the register.

Once he did, the place it on the counter and said while keeping his fake smile and told the cashier as he looked dead straight into his eyes, “This is it. This all that I would like to purchase from this fine establishment for today. Yup…hmmmm…beer. I sure do love my beer. So, how much do I owe you good sir?”

However there was only silence as the cashier just looked down and back up at Forrest multiple times. The silence was weird and was starting to get awkward and Forrest was starting to get nervous as well as starting to sweat from just the silence between him and the cashier.

However the cashier finally broke the silence by asking him, “Well do you have your ID then?”

Forrest then said, with a bit of worry in his voice, and a tad bit of loudness in his tone, “ID? But…I was here earlier today! Didn't you remember that I purchased this stuff from you?”

Forrest even made some slight gestures with his hoof, trying to get his point across.

However the cashier just looked at Forrest and said straight to him, “Sonny, I don’t even remember what I did ten minutes ago. I have bad memory problems. But if you did purchase something from here earlier, than you shouldn’t have trouble producing an ID. So cough it up lade!”

Forrest then started to get nervous and was starting to sweat some more as he had no way of purchasing the Cloud beer without having an ID that said that he was 21 years old. So Forrest did the only thing that he knew how to do best…act like a pussy and wuss out.

So Forrest then leaned forward across the counter top, closed his eyes and stretched his hooves forward for some reason and cried out, “Ok so I’m not old enough to buy alcohol! But please..please pleas please, I need this. This isn’t even for me, I swear it on my unborn sister’s fetus’s grave that it’s for a Christmas gift for a friend! I’m willing to pay you the full price and all! Just please let me get this…I’ll do anything…anything!”

The cashier remained unconvinced by Forrest's plea. But then he rolled his eyes back towards his head and he then started to think of when Forrest said ‘anything’ and soon, an idea hit the cashier guy. And the cashier guy said to Forrest, “Anything eh? He he he he he…ha ha ha ha HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAA…”

As the cashier was laughing, Forrest looked up towards the cashier pony and opened up his eyes and said quietly to himself, “Uh oh….”

SOMETIME LATER

"AND MAKE SURE TO CLEAN IT REAL GOOD! NICE AND DEEP! I HAD A PONY COME IN HERE EARLIER AFTER HE HAD EATEN SOME TACOS! AND IT WAS THE ONE WITH EXTRA BEANS...,"

The cashier had said while still being behind the counter. While the cashier was standing behind the counter, Forrest was in the place's only, capacity for only one, bathroom. The bathroom itself was like one of those dirty gas station bathrooms that you'd see if you went on a road trip of some kind. The walls were filthy and had mold growing on it, the sink was sort of half broken and could only dispense cold water while the hot water went somewhere else. There was no toilet paper or anything to dry your hands...hooves...whatever..

and the floors were covered in whatever dirt and grime that it had collected over the years. There were even some cockroaches crawling around with a light that would flicker on and off, driving the cockroaches a little crazy. And as for Forrest, he was sort of on his pony knees, with his face near the toilet with a toilet plunger nearby that looked like it was used and a tooth brush. Forrest had a clothespin on his noise so not to take in the rancid smell that eroded the bathroom.

And as for poor Forrest, he had a disgusted look on his face, but not because he was offended by something and was in shock and disgust, but that eeky kind of disgust where you have to get down and dirty for something. In this case, Forrest was tasked to clean the toilet and unclog it in order to be allowed to purchase his Cloud beer. and the toilet itself was not pretty either as it had rust a little bit on the inside of the bowl and outside of it. And there was some hard shit sort of trapped inside of it while also having shit stains everywhere.

It was...disgusting...

5 HOURS LEFT

After spending an hour and a half in the liquor store, Forrest was finally let go and he was off in the air and off to his next location.

As Forrest was flying, he said to himself as the stench from the bathroom never left him, "Awww...that was so disgusting. well, it can't get any worse. At least I was able to get one of the cloud beer cans. Shame I couldn't take the six pack. But it's the thought that counts...right? Ohhh...why am I even talking to myself right now? I've got to keep it together Forrest, my friends needs these gifts for Christmas. And by Celestia I shall deliver...dang it..."

And so Forrest was off to his next location...the Boggy Swamp at the Everfree Forrest to get that Rabbid frog's piss again. It took awhile, especially since he had to find his way through the deep, lushful forest that was the Everfree and all, but eventually he found his way to the swamp, long story short and found the Rabbid frog pretty much at the same spot as last time. It may not have been the same Rabbid Frog, but hey, beggars can't be choosers.

So Forrest was at the Boggy Swamp and he was hiding behind some bushes, staring at the Rabbid Frog. It had the same color even though Rabbid frogs can have different colors...but then it also means they might kill ya depending on the color, and Red is the most common color amongst Rabbid frogs. Anyways, Forrest was quietly hiding behind the bushes, waiting to see if the Rabbid frog did anything. It did nothing, it just stood there while its weird eyes made some weird movements with its pupil and shit.

As for Forrest he was trying to think on how to approach the frog and get the piss.

He had his eyes rolled back and thought to himself, 'How am I going to do this? Well...I think I have a spare jar. It's rather small though, but...it's the thought that counts...right? But how am I going to get it to piss into the jar? I don't have Jack here to help me out right now. This is a job for two ponies.'

Forrest then started to have a worried look on his face once more. He was left unsure on how to handle this situation that was presented before him. He thought and thought, but nothing of the ideas came up with would work. He thought about trying to multitask and hold the frog, push the stick in its with his mouth, and try to get the pee in the jar, but he's a fucking pony, he has hooves, what the fuck do you expect? Sure he has wings, but that can only be used for so much you know? I Know if he had a horn...well let's just say that's why the unicorns are the master race...mkay?

Anyway, He also thought about trying to surprise it and maybe even knocking it unconscious. But even then he was unsure of what might happened. And he didn't have the heart to harm it any shape or form either. So he needed to be careful about his approach. But the more he thought about it, he couldn't think of much. And sadly for him, the clock was ticking and he needed to do something then and there at the moment. So Forrest looked beside him and saw a wooden stick.

And after giving it a few more seconds of thought, he then said quietly to himself as he picked up the wooden stick and brought it close to his face, "Well...I suppose it couldn't be that bad...could it?"

Forrest had said it with a sad face and a sad tone in his vocal cords. It sounded like he was real down in the dumps, the kind of dumps where you kind of want to just lay down and just die. Like a little bitch. Well after Forrest had grabbed the stick, he then started to make his move, and that was by gently, softly, walking across the shallow waters of the swamp. Of course he made a little sound when walking through water, but Forrest tried his best to be as careful as he could be. So Forrest took it at a step at a time. Slowly, but surely he made his way to the Rabbid Frog, which I mind you was just sitting there like a bump on a log, not even looking out for any predators.

Well...I should say prey because the frog is the predator. Well anyways, Forrest got up right behind it, and then he counted to three in his head. One, his muscles tightened up, unsure of what might happen. Two, his mind and body ready for anything that nature threw at him. Three, and then Forrest quickly grabbed the Rabbid Frog while it was struggling and making piggy sounds and squealing.

But of course, Forrest is a clumsy doofus that forgot to take out the Jar. And the expression on his face was nothing but a struggle for him as he gritted his teeth and his eyes opened wide while trying to take control of the frog. He already had a stick on one hoof and he was trying to balance the frog on the other while trying to stand on his back two hind legs. It wasn't easy since he was used to being on all fours...like...everyone else most of the time.

But of course, he did have his right wing opened and that sort of helped his balance, but he just ended up hopping around little bit while trying his best to get the jar out. With a lot of struggle and squealing noises coming from the Rabbid Frog, he got the small jar out, and luckily the lid was taken off, mostly due to the struggle he was currently facing, and Forrest got the Rabbid Frog to face the right way. Well, he tried anyway.

It was moving like a schizophrenic on crack, but Forrest tried to hang on and wait for the right moment when the Rabbid Frog had its asshole facing towards the jar. And as for the stick...well obviously he wasn't going to get it right with his hoof, so he put the stick in his mouth real quick, and aimed for the hole.

Except when he aimed for the hole, he opened up Pandora's box as the Rabbid Frog stopped for a second, and within that second, Forrest thought he had got it and felt a stream of relief. Too bad it was the wrong hole though. The Rabbid Frog then started to have flames form around its skin as spikes enlarged into even bigger spikes as well has its little webbed feet turned into flaming claws all the while the weird eyes turned to pure black.

And then the neck stretched out and made a u-turn and turned around to look at Forrest, and when Forrest saw the Rabbid Frog stretch its neck out like that as if it was related to Stretch Armstrong...he knew he had fucked up. And once the Frog looked deeply into Forrest's eyes and soul with Forrest's mouth becoming more scarred by the second, the Rabbid Frog opened its mouth to reveal razor sharp teeth all around. and it even screamed...but not with a pig like sound, but as if it was a beast not to be reckoned with. And then it jumped on to Forrest's face and started to maul him.

Sadly though the thing mauled him off set and off camera, but I got to see it behind the scenes and it was trying to go for the eyes and it scratched him like hell along with yelling out, "HE HE HE...LUKA MY PERRY BITCHA"

and continued mauling Forrest to death. Well Forrest didn't die, but he could have though. Long story short though, the Rabbid Frog felt like he made his mark and let Forrest go. Luckily for him though, and this was back on set, the Rabbid Frog needed to take a piss anyway and it took a piss in the jar that Forrest had because once Forrest got attacked, he obviously dropped everything.

And when Forrest was being attacked, Forrest was also screaming, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M SORRY MR. FROG!!! I DIDN'T MEAN TO STICK IT IN THE WRONG HOLE MR.FROG! PLEASE HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL! I'M SORRY!!!"

4 HOURS LEFT

And so with that being said, the time was ticking down and not much time was left for Forrest to gather all the things that he needed. And an hour passed from the point when Forrest got attacked until he was ready to continue on. As for Forrest's condition after the Rabbid frog attack, he was scratched up and bruised. He was not looking so hot.

And it's not because of what the Rabbid Frog did to him. Well it was, but not what the frog gave him. He didn't give him aids, didn't give him anal (although it potential could have since the Rabbid Frog is known for such predatory acts), Forrest was just miserable.

He was sad, depressed, just downright beaten down to a bloody pulp. In fact, by this point, the light that graced the earth during the winter season was already gone. The only light for Forrest was either a little bit of Luna's moon light and some bugs that light up the dark that lived in the Everfree. As well as some plants here and there are known to bloom and illuminate during the winter nights. It's quite beautiful, but that's for another time.

As for Forrest, he was alone. In a way, he was, as Jack betrayed him, I sure as hell wasn't on his side, and no one was there to help him. He had it all working out at one point, had all the items and was looking forward to making this Christmas season count. But by the end of it all, it seemed pretty shitty. And within Forrest's mind, he had thought it was going to work out too.

He had some decent Christmas's in the past, and he thought he would make this one the same as the ones from the past, but make it ten or hundred times better and involve his friends. But instead, he was alone and time was running out. and Forrest, was just standing there in the dark of the Everfree Forrest. Alone in the dark, alone with his own mind.

He even looked up towards the sky and started to well up a little bit within his own eyes. He even had a little sniffle.

In his mind he thought, 'Is this all worth it? I'm in pain, I smell, my hooves hurt from the bits of glass, I'm running out of time, my body hurts, and a frog just attacked me. It even burned. And the worst part...I can't even get my friend's gifts. What am I going to do? Can I make it? I mean...I just have to. I've just gotta to make it work somehow. It can't end like this. Yeah...yeah...it can't end like this. Not now anyways. I've got to try, and as long as there is still time, by Celestia, I shall get through this and show them all. I'll show them a great Christmas...and everything is going to be good. everything...is going to be...good. I have to try. I have to believe it. Or else...why am I?'

And so, Forrest then looked around as some bugs chirped in the background in the winter air. He was thinking through his mind and he checked off all the things that he needed. He got the jewelry, at least a jewel. He got some Cloud Beer...or at least a Cloud Beer can. And not even the big can either, the small sample sized bottle he got instead. And he got a small jar filled with Rabbid Frog's piss. So he had half the items that he needed. So all that was left was my silver bell, Mac's cross bow, and Neon's hippo. Neon's...hippo...Forrest thought. All the items or inanimate materials, but the hippo was the difficult one.

Forrest thought, 'A hippo? That's right? How am I ever going to find one? Well, I sure can't find a real hippo around here...at least I don't think so. But...what about the Tiny Hippo from before? But I don't know anything about animals! Arrell and Fluttershy does. But Arrell can't know about what I'm doing and Fluttershy lives too far from here. Maybe...maybe they live around here?

'I mean it is uncommon to see them in Stalia, so they must live around here in the Everfree...I think...but...what is it's habitat like? Where does it hide or live? Ohhhh...only if I had somepony else's help it wouldn't be so bad. And it's so cold. Pull yourself together Forrest! You can do this! You're a full grown Stallion and...you can do this. Don't cry...don't cry...don't start crying now or else...or else nothing will get done. Just don't...cry.... Just...try to look around here and maybe try and call to it...maybe it'll come out...maybe...'

Forrest was starting to look like he was about to breakdown all of a sudden, but he kept telling himself in his heart to keep it all together and that everything was going to be ok. So he turned around and looked at his surroundings and even though everything was dark around him, he wasn't going to give up and was going to at least give it a shot.

So he raised one of his hooves and put it close to his mouth, while his arms hurt from just simply moving it, and said, "TINY HIPPPOO! UHHH...TINY HIPPPOOO!! WWWWWOOOO WOOOO WOO!!! COME OUT TINY HIPPO!! I UHH...I UHH GOT SOME TREATS FOR YOU!! I GOT UHHH...oh I don't have anything treats in my bag do I? UHHH...COME OUT COME OUT! PLEASE TINY HIPPOS COME OUT...maybe...maybe if I sing a song?.."

Deck..the halls with bales of holly...

Fa la la la la...la la la la...

Tis the season to be jolly...

Fa la la la la...la la ...la la....

maybe...another song? Uhhh...

Come out...come out

Little Tiny Hippo

Come out...come out...

everything will be...ok...

Don't worry the dark won't hurt

It's just me all alone

just all alone right here

I promise not to bite

I promise not to fight

I only want to see you in the light

I'm just trying to do my best tonight

I know my best is not enough said by Knight

But I try...

But I try to be good at heart

Even though I may not be smart

My friends may not care sometimes

But they mean to me many lifetimes

I'm alone...all alone

And I may moan and grown

Come out...come out...

tiny little ones

Come out....please come out...

And show me...the light...

"Ooohhhh...and I can't even rhyme right like last time. Even I suck at that. And...no...Tiny Hippos either."

Forrest then looked at his surroundings one more time, and to his dismay...there was nothing around. He was still all alone. and he sang all alone. But Forrest, deep in his own mind, wasn't about to give up just because all the odds were against him like that. He needed to do something so he looked down at the ground, and saw all kind of things. Leaves, moss, grass, and other natural things that grew in the Everfree Forrest.

Forrest wasn't happy but he got an idea though from it. So Forrest got down and sort of laid down on the ground and used his hooves to gather whatever was near him. and after a few minutes had passed by, Forrest was somehow able to create a poor replica of what appeared to be a Tiny Hippo out of whatever he had near him, which was mostly leaves and moss as well as some other material that was unknown to him.

And once Forrest was done, he brought it near his face and took one good look at it. It had two weird tiny dots that Forrest had no idea what to put on it to represent the eyes. He couldn't make a mouth though, as it was mostly just a big clump of stuff, that sort of resembles a hippo, although rather poorly that is. It had little ears that looked like hippo ears, at least the best that he could make it that is. But did have a round body and thick legs.

He also got the head right, but by the end of it though it just looked like a big blob of a mess that barely resembled a creature of some kind. It was the best that Forrest could do. And Forrest, was looking even more depressed. Although he looked mellow out with the look of his eyes, but not the good kind where you get high and you think of weird, but good thoughts. But instead it was the bad kind, the sad kind of mellow eyes.

His mouth was just a simple frown, he looked tired, and just overall his face just said he was about to give up.

However, he held his little creation towards his face and it looked like the size of a fully grown Tiny Hippo and Forrest just said to himself gently, "Well...at least it's the thought that counts...right? he he he...he...he...ohhhh...I wish I could do better but...sadly this is my best. I was I could do better...but...I'm all alone...in the dark..."

Forrest then gave a slight sigh and got up on his four legs. He then put the little tiny hippo thing into his white bag that was no longer white but rather it was dirty and looked like a dirty white van kind of color.

Forrest then looked up towards the night sky and while he couldn't see the moon and its position, as he was unsure if Luna's moon was actually full at all, he said to himself, "Well...time to get going then. I don't have much time left..."

And so Forrest started to head out of the Everfree Forest and head to his next destination, which was back in Stalia.

1 HOUR LEFT

There was 1 hour left until Christmas day. If it wasn't for the time limit, Forrest would be in luck as sometimes, especially on the weekends, stores open way past midnight. But in Forrest's case, he needed to get it all done by Midnight. But luckily for him, the last destinations was well within reach of each other. The only reason why it took him two hours to get back into Stalia was because he had to get out of the Everfree Forest. It was nighttime and that obviously means Forrest had trouble finding his way out of course. He didn't have cat eyes or anything like that.

And he certainly wasn't eating his carrots for that matter either...OR STICKING IT IN HIS EYE SOCKETS... but you get the idea. He wasn't exactly the best around. Sure he doesn't mean being extreme like Rainbow Dash and going on adventures and being daring and the like, but really he was the pussy version of Rainbow Dash in some ways. And he'll always be the pussy version too, just for the record.

But anyways, Forrest couldn't really fly either due to the thick tree branches that covered most of the top of the Everfree. And considering he was all alone with no guidance, it certainly made things more difficult for him too. But Forrest still kept moving forward and somehow got out that forest himself. I mean...if a Forrest within a Forest exists, then that Forrest can find its way out of the Forest from within. What?

Anyways, Forrest, once he made it out of the Everfree of course, was then able to use his wings and fly like a bird and quickly get back to Stalia. And when he was doing so, Forrest looked upwards and he had a bit of a confused look on his face. With the little that he could see, there appeared to be clouds up in the sky, more than usual to be more exact. And while this was winter time, that is to be expected and of course the pegasi also plan this shit out...most of the time that is...being a part of the pegasus race himself, he was made unaware of these changes.

As I am sure there exists a conspiracy theory out that the Pegasi control the weather and the theory made up of some man child living in the basement of his dead grandmother and wearing a three layered tin foil hat. And to be fair it is true...just not in that Jewish kind of way. But the unicorn conspiracy theory might be true...just saying. Well, aside from that, Forrest noticed these clouds and was starting to snow as well. it was light and the cold air only felt a tad bit colder than what it was before two hours ago. But Forrest couldn't help but have that confused look on his face with the one raised eye brow and shit.

But Forrest was running on time here so he just said to himself, "I've got to do this. I can't fail...I just can't. I won't...I swear I won't..."

And Forrest even closed his eyes a little bit and was starting to well up some more tears a little bit more than two hours ago. It was starting to really get to him with how the clock was ticking down and there wasn't much time left. Deep down, he just wished he had more time, just like the rest of us sometimes.

But, no matter where he was at, whether it being here on earth or a magical land filled with Technicolor talking ponies with rainbows and friendship, no one or one thing can escape the stark reality of time itself. And Forrest was no exception to that rule either. So Forrest tried his best to keep going and tried to push himself. It was hard to do so, as all seemed hopeless to continue on with so much little time. Most would have just thrown in the towel and given up. But Forrest though was different, different than the rest in Stalia. Hell, he could fit in perfectly as a background pony in Ponyville...if it wasn't for "problems", as it was within his heart; he had something to fight for.

He had something in his heart and soul that kept him moving despite all the odds against him. He had to do this, if not for himself or his friends, he needed to do it for his memories and his past self at the very least. He had to do it for the childhood memories and the like. Because if he didn't, then he wouldn't have a soul, at least that's what he thought to himself that is. So Forrest pushed forward and quickly, with about 55 minutes left to spare, made it to the weapon shop.

He landed swiftly and only slightly hurt his hooves when he landed. It was mostly because of due to the fact that the bits of glass from earlier was still giving him problems. And of course by this point, he wasn't all cleaned and presentable from earlier. He was all fucked up.

He had scratched all over his face from the Rabbid Frog attack. His hooves and winter cloths along with his bag was covered in mud and dirt as well as what appeared to be some of dark green moss and slime from when he was just standing in the middle of the Boggy Swamp. He had a few thorns sticking out from his body from just trying to get through the Everfree Forest in enough time. He was also bruised up pretty badly and had a little bit of dried blood capped to his coat here and there as well as a slightly blacked eye as well. And of course, underneath his hooves, there were little cuts from the broken glass he stepped on.

But of course...just as much as Forest was a wreck, and a weakling...he could have flown over the glass from before. I mean it was in the script, but either he didn't read that part when we had that table read or, and more than likely, because Forrest has a bit of a wing problem if I remember hearing correctly where he has a bit of a trouble when it comes to accuracy and some gaps with his wings. He hadn't exactly gone to the same place with Rainbow Dash and the academy...yet, he says he's planning on doing it...but only because of Rainbow Dash, but we'll see how that goes later in the future. Any who...with how much he was fucked up, he also smelled pretty badly.

And for Forrest to smell, he wasn't exactly too happy about that either. For most of us males, we don't mind if we smell a little bit or if it's a job, we sure as hell don't care if we smell. Just as long as it isn't around some pretty females. Well at least with everyone else that is, for me I stopped caring since I went through the outside of the universe portal all those years ago. Got to stop at some point you know? But anyways, Forrest didn't like to smell bad, especially if he was around Rainbow Dash.

I mean, clearly he's a like mamma's boy or something on those lines so he was pretty much wants to remain as clean as he possibly can. So it bothered him, mostly on the inside and within the heart, that he smelled pretty badly. But if it meant with what he was doing for friendship, then so be it. So he landed of course right in front of the weapon's shop, all swiftly and shit, and quickly made his way into the shop by opening up the single glass door and all, which also made that little bell ring noise as well just like the Big Red's Letter from earlier.

And of course Forrest had a very worried look on his face as well as a look within his eyes as if he tried to cry earlier. And he was also trying to catch his breath just a bit as well as his chest moved in and outward a little bit. So Forrest got into the weapon store quickly and the door closed behind him and once he did, once more, he would be able to get a better look at the shop from within. Because montage... Inside the store, everything was made out of wood. Sort of like a big, ol’ fancy log cabin that had a store in it.

Pretty much the complete opposite of the jewelry store. And it looked like one of those old timey general stores too, but a bit more modernized per say. It looked in similar to that alcohol store in terms of structure and everything was just shelves on the wall and small isles that placed smaller items and such. But instead of selling liquor, it was selling weapons of various kinds as well as accessories and clothing for whatever reason.

They sold ammunition there separately, especially for the newly equated guns they just got. They sold accessories like a flashlight that could be attached as well as just simple more hand…hoof..whatever…based items like a machete or a really big knife. They even sold some primitive stuff like a bow and arrow and a spear. They also sold rocks, the best kind of weapons. They also sold bullet proof vests that was supposedly reliable, but to be fair it was just a lot of cheap stuff made for that vest, mostly because they were starting to figure shit out.

They also had some smaller, more convenient items like a bag of chips, some soda, and a brand of beer or two that you could buy. There was even apple cider for the kiddies to enjoy for whenever the fathers brought their kids to the shop, was drunk off their asses, and demanded they got a hay burger with extra fries because they think they are at a restaurant…and then when they are told it’s not a restaurant, they stand there with big eyes, constantly scream, “WHAT!?”, and then try to go on a murderous rampage.

Anyways, one more thing to note about the general layout of this store was that it was a bit more opened. There was more room to walk through compared to that liquor store from before and there was one big area to look at guns and other such weapons behind display cases that was near the register. There were even some weapons hanged up on the wall, the more premium kind of weapons, the special ones that needed more time to be crafted. Anyways, outside of that, the whole look of the place, to be more specific, was lit up by what looked like candle light, but was really electric.

You know, those kind of lights that look old timey but they‘re really not. There was even a clear opening to the back that looked like it was only for the employees there as well. Anyways, Forrest walked in, all fucked up and shit, but he wasted no time and went straight to the register where the pony behind the register was. He looked like an ok pony, but he was a big boi though as he had a big, thick, rough beard. And both of his mane and facial hair was of a dark colored brown. He also had a cream-ish sort of coat color with a hint of yellow in it. He also wore a baseball cap and he looked like a reasonable pony. A big fellow, but reasonable.

He even had a bit of a deep, but calming voice. Not the black guy kind of deep, more the white guy kind of deep. Anyways, Forrest ran up the counter, still trying to catch his breath and all, and when he did and stopped in front of the counter, he was still looking miserable as ever.

And as his lungs were breathing in and out, trying to take in oxygen and Forrest's head hanging a bit low, the big boi pony said, "Hello, welcome to The Rack. Need any help finding anything?"

And Forrest...didn't say anything. He was still trying to catch his breath and was looking a little bit more down than he was a few seconds ago. Almost as if he wanted to give up and go back home. But the guy at the register just looked at him and was a bit confused as he was one of his eyebrows up. But then he started to think about something as a thought came to his mind.

Soon the Big Boi pony said to Forrest, "Say, why are you here anyway? Don't you know that there's a winter storm coming by soon?"

Forrest then raised his head back up and his face became as worried as ever. He was shocked and was a bit lost for words and his voice was a bit of a mess. As if he wanted to cry and breakdown a little bit.

Forrest said to the big boi pony, "A storm? Oh did it have to get this worse? It's bad enough as it is for me. Oh never mind, do you have a Cross bow that you can sell to me?! I'm in a bit of a hurry here!"

Forrest was looking desperate as he had put his right hoof on the glass counter top that was the display case to some of the weapons inside of it.

Forrest was looking really desperate, but the big boi pony read his emotions but sadly said to Forrest, "Sorry kid, just sold my only one to some pony that looked classy and made have been a jack of all trades or something."

Forrest then looked down to the ground and groaned, "Awwwwwwww...."

And then the big boi pony then said to Forrest as he was having his eyes rolled back up towards his head, thinking of something, "And I think he had a faggot friend along with him too I think."

Forrest then hanged his head real low and said in a low tone as he looked up at the big boi pony in depression, "awww...now that hurts..."

Forrest then raised his head up again a little bit as the big boi pony then grabbed something from behind the counter and said, "I can give you this slingshot though. That's the closest that I have to a cross bow."

When the big boi pony grabbed out a small sized, slingshot, a typical one at that, and placed it on the counter top, Forrest just looked at it like everything else that he had to settle for from earlier.

And after a few second of thinking it over in his head and staring at it, he just mellowed out with his eyes, but with depression, and asked in a disappointed tone with a sigh, "How much is it?"

The big boi pony then proudly said, "Ten bits!"

Then the big boi pony turned around like he did from last time and took a look at the list of the ponies that he isn't supposed to sell to.

He had a curious look on his face as one of his eyebrows, was surprisingly raised as he said, "Now let me just take a look and make sure you're on the list."

But then Forrest interrupted him looking from the list, placed his hoof on the glass counter top, as well as the big boi pony looked over to him was just moving his eyes, "But...that's a list of ponies that you're not supposed to sell to."

Forrest had said it in a desperate tone as well and the big boi pony just turned his, still with his raised eye brow, but with a bit of shocked eyes and asked Forrest, "It's a what now?"

And then a few loud knocks came from the front of the store, although you couldn't see who it was, and a loud, tough, authoritative voice yelled out, "B.F.I. OPEN UP!!!"

And then the wall from the front of the store, well most of it anyways, was blown up and broken down. And after the explosion, a group of five ponies that looked like they were in Swat gear, but the pony version of it with the letter, B.F.I. in big and bold attached to their gear and uniform, came busting in and such. And they all had automatic weapons and such, they looked pissed with just the look of their mouths and them gritting their teeth as they were wearing helmets as well and you couldn't see their eyes their visor.

And one or two of them were standing on their hind legs with some back hind leg support while others were holding the guns in their mouths, hooves, or fully prone to the ground, aiming the gun at the big boi pony. And then they went guns a blazing. Bullets were flying everywhere and none of the bullets were hitting Forrest or the big boi pony. It's like the storm troopers from star wars...because the BFI can't hit for shit I tell ya. And Forrest was not scarred, he just stood there, with a worried look on his face from before, just watching the BFI go guns a blazing.

And as for the big boi pony, he was shocked at first, but then he quickly ducked under the glass counters and a second or two later, he came back up with an angry face like what the BFI had on, along with a big ass LMG.

He then planted the LMG on the glass counter top and yelled out, "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE YOU DAMN DIRTY PIGS!!!"

And then the big boi pony started guns-a-blazing as well. And then Forrest was caught in a fire fight...kind of. He was in between the two sides exchanging bullets of each other, but Forrest, or the two sides were not affected by this at all. In fact no one died at all that day except for having of bullet being sprayed everywhere and littering the ground.

As for Forrest, he just calmly, causally looked at the slingshot, picked it up with his left hoof, and brought it closer to his face. When he did, he went back to having his mellowed out, depressing eyes and gloomy face and looked at the sling shot into more detail. It was a bit thick, but thin at the same time. It looked like it was made out of that cheap wood as well, pine perhaps. And it had a little rubber thingy for the slingshot in the middle.

Forrest looked at it and after a few quick seconds had passed, he then just said to himself, "It's the thought that count...right?"

And then after he said that, Forrest gave a sigh to himself, looked down, and put it in his white bag. He then pulled out ten bits after he had put the slingshot away and placed it on the counter top, to give it to the big boi pony since he was buying it and all.

And then Forrest calmly, but depressingly walked out of the store. And right about here, it would be almost as if there was sad, orchestral music would be playing in the background. As Forrest walked out of the store, he had his head hanging down low, while the sounds of the firefight was blaring somewhere in the background back at the weapons shop.

And Forrest walking slowly and said to himself gently, "Ohhhh...what am I going to do? I don't have any of the gifts that my friends wished for? What will Jack think when he gets his diamond? It's only so small and doesn't look as fancy or classy as him. What about Wolf's cloud beer? Sure he'll get one, but...from the way he sounded, it sounded like he wanted more than just one. And what about Arrell? I mean...I guess it'll be enough. Sure the jar is small, so hopefully it'll be enough..I hope... And Neon's hippo? Well...maybe he could use a tiny, fake, hoof-made hippo...from all the natural elements from the Everfree. And as for Mac...well...I guess he can still use a slingshot. It could still... do what he wants it to do...I suppose. And Knight...wait...KNIGHT!? OH NO I DON'T HAVE HIS GIFT YET!"

Forrest then went into panic mode and it could be read that from the look on his face. His teeth were gritted, he had big eyes as if he was on heroin, and huge quickly turning his head, as if he was looking for something. Eventually he found a clock and the clock read thirty minutes to minute.

Forrest then yelled out to himself, "AND THERE ISN'T MUCH TIME LEFT EITHER!"

And so Forrest quickly and swiftly made his way to the store that he had gotten the silver bell from earlier. As said before, it wasn't far from the weapons store, so he was able to see it within his own vision. So he quickly made his way and once he had saw the store got closer and closer he had a smile on his face. He had hope within his heart and soul. He just knew he would make it in time. He knew he was right for not given up.

In his mind, perhaps that Christmas wouldn't be so bad after all. He would have at least given all of his friends gifts. In a way, Forrest didn't give up. He had enough heart and soul to keep going and he was going to make it...until the owner of the store came to the front of the store window which was a glass window door by the way, and hanged up a closed sign.

And once Forrest saw this, his face went from having hope and joy in his heart to disappointment and despair all over his face as he said to himself gently, "What?"

And then Forrest crashed into the glass door. He didn't break it, mostly because he doesn't have the muscle for it, but his face was smashed against it. But he quickly fixed that and looked up. The store owner of course thought it was weird but shrugged it off as he saw Forrest crashed into the front of his business.

Forrest however quickly yelled out, "BUT WHY!? YOU'RE USUALLY OPENED UNTIL MIDNIGHT AT LEAST!?"

The store owner, who looked like he didn't care very much, all with a look of a normal pony that you would get through a random pony generator that is, said, "Storm's coming...got to close up early and get on home you know?"

And then the store owner walked away...and never to been seen again from this special...because fuck him right?

And Forrest was left alone, as he starred up and looked at that "CLOSED" sign hopeless and sad.

Forrest then said to himself, "B-But it can't be...I was so close...I was...so...close.."

And then as Forrest said those last words, he eyes started to well up as his head was hanging low. And then Forrest looked over to the big glass window where ponies would do some window shopping if they had wanted to do so. He got up, walked over to the big window display to the store that was on the outside as he sniffled a little bit and put his face up against the glass to get a good look at was inside.

As of course had put both of his front hooves flatly on the window as well, as he just starred as what was on display. It was the display from the night before. It had the Santa Pony outfit that was on a mannequin, a record player that wasn't even on, and various Christmas related decorations for a party or something. And within that, he also noticed a silver bell as well. And Forrest couldn't help but start to cry a little bit as the tears started to flow down his cheeks.

He then took his face and hooves off the glass, closed his eyes as he started to weep, and looked and hanged his head downwards and said to himself, "I-I-I failed. I-I-I-I-I-I tried s-s-so h-hard a-a-and i-i faaaaaiiiiilllledddd..."

And Forrest cried for a few seconds as he tried to wipe the tears from his eyes. He was even sounding like he was coughing up a bit, even though he wasn't. He was trying his best to breath and cry at the same time and couldn't help but cry like how everyone does when they are left in tears. He cried and cried, with no one else to hear his plea. And when Forrest thought all was lost and was all alone, a hoof gently was placed on his left shoulder, a familiar hoof that was.

And a deep voice that sounded familiar as well to Forrest, "Are you looking for this?"

Forrest then said, as he was trying to open his eyes and wipe away the tears to get a good look at who was talking to him, "What?"

And then Forrest turned around to see who was behind him. Why...it was Santa Pony of course. And he was standing tall and mighty with a warm smile that welcomed Forrest. It gave Forrest such a warm feeling that once Forrest saw Santa Pony, his tears stopped flowing, his despair turned into hope, and his frown turned into a smile. And the best part of this, was that on the hoof, Santa Pony had a nice, shiny silver bell, all for Forrest to have and to give to Knight...that was Me...you get the idea.

And Forrest looked at it, and then looked back at Santa Pony with a big, warm, hopeful smile on his face, and tried to wipe away the remaining tears away as he took the silver bell and got a closer look at it as Santa Pony took his hoof off of Forrest because that might have been counted as sexual assault in the state of California.

And as Forrest looked at the silver bell, he shook it a little and could hear a beautiful ringing sound coming from it. And he then brought his hoof that was holding the silver bell downwards and closer to his chest a little and looked towards Santa Pony and they both stared each other in silence. Until of course Forrest immediately went and gave Santa Pony a big hug, a big, warm hug that Santa Pony gladly embraced himself and wrapped one of his hooves around Forrest as Forrest was standing on his back hind legs while trying to give the said hug.

And as Forrest was giving his hug, he said to Santa Pony, "Thank You."

And then Forrest let go of Santa Pony, without a single word, and Santa Pony didn't say a single word either, as Forrest quickly put the silver bell in his white bag, and started heading out. And as Forrest was running away and towards my home, Santa Pony said to himself, "Hmmph...that should do it..."

And that was it from him. And as for Forrest, he was heading towards my home of course, as he ain't got nothing left to do. And he was running towards my home, with a cheerful glee in his heart with excitement and pure joy. Sure there was little time left, but yet he had all the gifts at least to give and to him that was all that had mattered. The party could be a shit show, as long as he was about to at least give the gifts to his dear friends, he would be left at peace.

As for what direction Forrest he took, he went in short of a weird shortcut. Yeah there's a weird shortcut to my place from where Forrest was at. He just had to pass a nearby lake and it was sort of like going to the outskirts, but then after a while he would make a sharp turn to the left and he would be at my home in a jiffy.

And that was that route that Forrest was taking too. Granted though he could have flown there, but two things was wrong with that idea though. One, Forrest was way, way, way too happy and was just so excited that in his mind was just busy was all the things that we would be able to do at the party as well as it being a mission success.

And two, even if it wasn't on his mind, his wings would have to be put on hold as that snow storm was coming by, and as Forrest was running towards my home, that snow storm started coming. One minute, there was gentle snow fall, coming down, quite a lot actually, all with Forrest having a smile on his face. And then...right before the snow storm hit, Forrest slipped on a patch of ice that was on the tail that he was taking. And what was even worst for him was that there was a nearby wood chipper that was left unattended but was also turned on by one of the ponies who worked nearby that did some shit with it.

And once Forrest had slipped on that patch of ice...black ice to be exact, he somewhat went forward, as he tried to catch himself, but that only made things worse, because as he tried to struggle, his bag flew off of his neck and into the wood chipper...and everything inside of it went into the wood chipper...except for the silver bell that "luckily" came out at the last second and was not harmed.

But Forrest didn't notice this and was sort of lost as he landed flat on the ground, Forrest saw his white, dirty bag being shredded, along with everything that was inside of it to pieces. And Forrest watched in horror as this was happening as well as hearing that awful buzzing sound when something would be put through the wood chipper as well. And it somewhat slowly went through too as Forrest had to watch as all of his hard work went to shit...slowly…and painfully.

And once everything was put through the wood chipper, the remains of it came out the other end and into bits with bit of sawdust and ripped pieces of the white bag. And Forrest just laid there, speechless, wide eyes, no words to express about the sheer amount of bad luck that was bestowed upon him that day. And then after a few seconds of silence that had passed by, Forrest slowly got up, still shocked and with big eyes that were horrified by the sight that he had just seen, and walked towards the remains that was his bag and its contents.

He then stopped when he was near it and stared at it for a few seconds. And after a few seconds more, he then tried to grab some of the pieces and take a closer look at it. So he got onto his pony knees, took both of his hooves, and grabbed a whole bunch of the shredded bits...and then he got a closer look at it. It was all ripped to pieces...just like how his heart was at that moment. And to make matters worse, the snow storm hit, and it came in fast and hard as the wind blew quickly into Forrest's direction which then in turned blew away all the things that was from the bag and into the wind. And soon it was all gone. Forrest had nothing. All day he was excited for all to go right. He had hope.

He had dreams. He had a heart. He had only one simple Christmas wish that year, and it was to spend it with his friends and giving them gifts that they had wanted, and to have a party his friends and spread good cheer and good will towards others.

It was to be in that Christmas spirit and to make the memories that he had wish that he had with his father at one point. It was to please his past, child self as well as make the memories of the best Christmas ever. And now...that was all gone. Forrest had ran out of time by that point. He had no bag, no gifts, and now he would have to buy it all over again. He didn't even have a party set up either. All of his efforts, went to waste. And Forrest then sat on his pony ass, started to cry again. All the while the snow storm blowing up a huge storm and the cold beating down Forrest's neck. But Forest wasn't worried about the cold, if anything he felt like dying.

He wanted to die, he was...dead inside...and the tears came in flowing pretty quickly as he put his hooves up to his eyes and the tears started to go everywhere as he said to himself, "T-T-T-T-They were r-r-r-riiiight. K-K-K-K-K-ni-i-ight was r-r-r-r-right. T-T-T-There’s no p-po-po-point holding onto something l-like this, I-It’s t-t-time for me to l-let it all go…b-b-but I don’t want to let it go…b-b-b-but I have to. I h-have to let it go…I have to let it gooooo because…because they’re r-r-r-riiiiight.”

Forrest continued to cry and weep tear after tear. Forrest then continued to say as the tears continued to flow down his cheek, “A-A-All of it was worth for nothing. It was pointless. All I tried to do was…was try and make it good for my friends…and…and make it the best Christmas that ever was for me and my friends. I just w-wanted to make it special just l-like it was when I was a kid. And I faaaaaiiiillleed!!! W-W-Why does it hurt so much to try and l-let go? B-B-But I have to try, because that’s the only thing left that I can doooooo! But…but…but it still hurts!!!”

And then Forrest continued to cry for a few minutes by himself, as the snowstorm continued to blow in like a monster. The cold storm didn’t bother Forrest of course, as he was just too sad and too depressed. With everything that he had done, he just wanted to be alone. He just wanted to wallow in his own pity. He was all alone, and alone on Christmas eve…or day…whatever…with no one else around, No friends to cheer him up and certainly no family either. He had failed himself, his memories, his friends, his family, everything.

He was…well to simply put…a failure. And there was nothing more that he could do about it as he cried out his eyes, all alone in the middle of the night as the storm breezed past him as if Forrest didn’t exist.

And then someone was behind Forrest and a voice came out from a certain someone, wink wink, and said to Forrest, “Stop whining you pussy.”

And then Forrest turned around as the tears continued to come out from his eyes as he said, “Huh?”

Forrest then saw…well…his friends. He saw me, Neon, Arrell, Mac, and even Jack. We were all standing right behind him, bundled up in our only winter cloths that we had, and we all had ok expressions on our faces. We didn’t have smiles, but we weren’t depressed or sad or pissed if. We were just neutral, that was the expression on our faces and I was pretty much ahead of the group and was near Forrest.

Once Forrest had seen us though, he said to me as he turned back his head and hanged his head low as he continued to sit on his pony ass, “I guess you-you’re here to tell me how much you were right I guess? Because if so…I deserve it. J-Just make sure to leave me out here when you’re done…I want to be alone right now..”

And then Forrest continued to weep, although this time a little bit more quietly than what he was doing before. Possibly because he was trying to hold back as much tears as possible since he was crying in front of us.

But I then gave a sigh as I had my eyes rolled up to the back of my head a little and I then placed my hoof on Forrest’s shoulder as I said to him and he turned his head towards me, “Listen, can you stop crying like a little bitch? Just come with us so you can stop being an idiot and come out of the cold. You’ll die out here.”

Forrest then said, “Well…well maybe I do want to die right now.”

I then said to Forrest, “No you don’t. Now shut up and follow me or we’ll kick your fucking ass…got it Forrest?”

Forrest then got up slowly, but surely, and as the tears continued to flow down from his eye sockets, he said to us quietly, “I get it guys. I-I’ll go…lead the way…”

And then without another word, I lead the way, sort of, Forrest was walking right next to me at the same time. As for the other guys, they followed right behind and then we all walked in the cold, winter storm. It wasn’t much further to my place so we headed there to get warm. Now you must be wondering, how did we know about Forrest was out there? And why did we all of a sudden care? Was it in the script? If this were genuinely happened back in Equestria for real, would we still do it? Well…yes and yes, those are the answers. And there’s nothing to say more about that part either.

So anyways, we were walking and eventually we made it back to my home, and of course it was locked. I had to keep Wolf locked in before he thought the snowstorm was the Michelin Man that came to bring him some cookies from the planet WaWaKa.

Wolf…Wolf has some problems I tell you. And his imaginary drinking buddy is ALF just so you now. And according to Wolf, ALF is constantly asking where the anti-freeze is as well as the bomb so he can go to Israel and “Free the people”.

Anyways, Forrest was right next to me, pretty much ready to go in and just lay on the floor and possibly wait to die or something like that. And once I had the key and unlocked the door, I opened the door, but all the lights were turned off. And Forrest was waiting for me to turn the lights on since he isn’t much the one for going into dark places like that. He even has a little teddy bear night light in his bed room whenever he turns off the light.

That's how much of a pansy he is. Anyways, once the door was opened and the darkness was revealed to Forrest, I went ahead, stepped into my home a little bit, and turned on the light switch. And once I did turn on the light switch…SURPRISE, we had a whole Christmas party set up, mostly for Forrest.

And once the lights came on, We all said in unison, except for Forrest of course who instead had a surprised look on his face as we all said, “SUURRRPRISE!!!”

And Jack quickly said after we all said surprise, “faggot…”

And we all said with big smiles on our faces, that were not forced by the way, we actually meant it, and we said it with a cheer and goodwill. We even raised our hooves up in the air a little bit, especially Neon was standing on the back of his hind legs and went a bit crossed eyed for a second or two. And of course, as for Wolf, he popped out from behind the couch in a drunken state as he had a lamp shade over his head and stumbled out like a usual drunk.

And once he did come out from behind the couch, he tried to look at Forrest and said to him, “Surprise! You dirty Pegasus!”

And then Wolf fell flat on the ground. And of course Forrest was taken aback by everything. Usually we use him as a punching bag and not long before, he was crying his eyes out like a little bitch. And yet we were all there, throwing him a surprise Christmas Party…all for him too. He was speechless to say the least, but not because he was sad or in despair.

Not because he had lost everything that he had dreamed so much of. Instead, it was because he was happy. His heart started to soar and hope returned immediately to his heart. He wasn’t sure if this was real or not. He was thinking he was hallucinating and it was all a near death experience. But…it was real. It was right in front of his eyes and he could smell the fresh food that was made that was sitting by a nearby table. He could see the Christmas decorations along with a Christmas tree, a real one, hanged up in the corner.

There were also string of Christmas lights everywhere as well as Christmas music on a record player, ready to begin when the party started. There were also egg nog and other festive drinks as well as Christmas Crackers and what looked like games to play. All with a Christmas theme sitting around it all. Granted, there were no Christmas presents, mostly because there wasn’t much to get in such a short amount time that we had to put it all up.

Seriously, we had to put all of this shit up within hours. And of course, as Forrest was staring at all of this in complete awe, everyone walked into the library a.k.a. my home of mine, I shut the door behind them, and we all kept our big, bright, warm smiles on as Forrest, who slightly walked into my home as well keep in mind, just stood there and had his mouth opened a little, as he was just left in complete shock as to what he was seeing, especially since it was from us after all.

Eventually, Forrest broke his silence as we all walked in front of him to see his reaction, “I-I-I can’t believe this. You did this? You did this all for me?”

Forrest had said that with a curious look on his face with a raised eye brow and I then said to him, “Well…not exactly. I still stand by what I said to you…buuuuuut…it’s actually Christmas the day of so…why not?”

I said with a little smirk on my face, but Forrest still seemed like he wasn’t convinced.

Forrest then asked us, “B-But how did you guys know though? I was supposed to be doing this…for you guys!”

I then said, as I moved my head a little bit to the side, “Weeeeeelll…Jack kind of came and told us about you and what you were trying to do. You sneaky son of a gun you.”

Forrest then said, “Jack?”

Jack, who had an actual, legitimate, genuine, wholesome smile on his face this time, walked forward and then stood right next to Forrest, side by side, and put his right hoof around Forrest's neck and said to him, “Yup.”

As Forrest’s neck was hanging a bit low as it was wrapped by Jack, he then asked Jack, ”But…you…when you pushed me…and…”

Jack cut him off and he said to Forrest, “Like I said Forrest…us assholes have a heart sometimes.”

Forrest’s surprised and shocked face then slowly turned into a great, big, warm smile as his eyes seemed like it started to glow with pure joy in his eyes as he then asked Jack, ”So…does this mean you’re starting to turn over a new leaf and you’ll stop using me as your punching bag then?”

Jack then said, who still had his arm around Forrest, took away his smile in response and pretty much had an ok face on, more or less with a hint of anger in it, “Of course not. I’m still the usual asshole that I am and I’ll still call you a faggot from now till the day that we die and maybe then some.”

Forrest's smile then disappeared into a disappointed look on his face, but then his smile was brought back into a hopeful look as Jack then said, also with a smile and a wink by his right eye, “Buuuut…I can stop being an asshole for the next few hours and call you a Baguette instead.”

And then Jack went back to the others and we all went back to staring at Forrest and waiting to see his full reaction.

Forrest then asked us, “But…how did you guys find me out in the snow storm?”

I then said to Forrest, “Well, we went out looking for you like an hour or two ago. We searched you at the Everfree, Arrell looked for you up in the clouds, the bar, and I even looked for you in Ponyville, but we just happened to hear you crying like a wuss and so we found ya.”

Forrest then said, as he started to well up in tears, but tears of joy this time, “I-I can’t thank you guys enough. This means so much to me and…”

And then Forrest’s smile turned into a frown and his head started to hang low as he said to the us, “Ohhh…that’s right. I don’t have Christmas gifts for you guys.”

Arrell then said, with a confused look on his face, “What?"

Forrest then continued to say to us, with a little bit of puppy dog eyes, “When I had asked you all what you would have wanted a wish for Christmas, I was going to try and get it for you guys. And then I tried my best and got it all…but it got destroyed in a wood chipper and now I have nothing for you all. I’m sorry.”

And so, Forrest went back to being disappointed and sad all over again. He wasn’t crying, but it looked like he was going to start again.

But before such a thing could even happen, I then said to him, “Quit whining Forrest!”

Forrest’s head rose up and he looked at us, and we were all smiling at him as I held one of my forearms out towards him as I said to him with a big smile, “This is a Christmas Party Forrest! Stop worrying and let’s start having some fun, alright!?”

And I even gave him a little wink with my left eye too.

And once he saw that, he then cracked a smile, and then after a few seconds of silence, he then jumped up high into the air, well, at least as much as he could with being inside and all, and yelled out as he spread out his arms and wings, “MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!”

And then we all gave him a loud cheer and the party began. And what a night it was. While it wasn’t technically Christmas eve still, it was still Christmas, early in the morning, and we sure did have a heck of a time partying. We had played games, ate a whole bunch of festive related food, as well as dancing and singing Christmas corals to one another as we all held our hooves together in good cheer. It was all very wholesome.

However, at one point during the night, something else did happen. Wolf was on the couch, trying to get drunk on egg nog and failing miserably because of it. Arrell was hanging out with Jack and talking to him about stuff. Neon had a blindfold on and was trying to play some weird game with Mac as Mac was trying to direct him to do something and was becoming frustrated with it as well. And as for me, I was over by the food table trying eat some lousy fruit cake.

And as for Forrest, he was nearby the door, sitting there by himself, overlooking the whole party and just having a warm smile on his face. He was at peace with himself. You could see it in his big eyes as his pupils were a bit bigger than usual. He was truly at peace with himself. He was at peace with his memories. He was at peace with childhood memories.

And…if anyone that time got any wish that they had wanted to come true…it was Forrest. It didn’t go exactly as planned, but in the end he got what he wanted. In his heart, he was happy with it all. And he was going to remember this moment forever and ever all within in his heart and soul and was never going to let this memory go ever. He was going to keep it and remember this one moment in his heart forever.

And then as he was in deep thought about all of this, he heard a slight knocking on the my front door. His ears perked up a bit, as he was curious as to who would have been at the door at that time of night as well as during a snow storm of all things. Forrest looked back to see if we had heard anything, but we were all busy, minding our own business and having a genuinely fun time.

So, Forrest looked back towards the door, and gently opened it up without us even noticing. And when he did, he went and opened the door a little bit, just a crack just to see who it was And when he did, he saw no one there. He was confused by seeing no one there, and was starting to wonder if he was going crazy or something. He even had wondered if the winter storm that was still strong as ever going on outside had anything to do with it.

But then Forrest decided to look down, and once he did, he saw a little present sitting at my door step. It was a red box with a green ribbon and a nicely tied bow on top of it. And there was even a little tag attached to it.

And there was a slight note on top of the box that said, "I believe you dropped this."

But before Forrest could pick up the note and maybe see who it was from, the note disappeared into the snow storm, as if it was like magic. So Forrest quickly took another look outside, to make sure no one else was out there, and once he had seen no one else, he went ahead and took the present swiftly from the outside cold and brought it inside. And of course, he closed and locked the door behind him. And once he had did so, he then held the present with one hoof and took a closer look at the tag.

It read: “TO: KNIGHT FROM: FORREST”

Forrest then had a little smile on his face, but a small one as he may have had an idea who it might have been from, a certain pony that was, but then wondered what it could have been though. But since he had a gut feeling that it was from Santa Pony, he went ahead and walked over towards me while I was still at the food table. And when I saw Forrest come walking up to me, I had a curious look on my face as well, wondering what was in the box as I tried to cough up chunks of fruit cake. Forrest even had a little smile on his face.

As Forrest came up walking to me though, I had asked him, “What’s that Forrest?”

Forest, once he was right next to me and handed…hoofed…whatever…me the present, he said to me, “It appears that I didn’t lose all of your guys’ Christmas presents.”

So I took the present from Forrest, who looked like he was eager for me to open up the box as I had a curious look on my face with a raised eyebrow of course. I didn’t say anything else, just kept my mouth shut until I saw what was inside of it. So I gently unwrapped the green bow, took the top part of the box off, and saw what was inside of it. It was a silver bell, and it had a little snow on it as well. So I took the bell and I then no longer had a curious look,

but instead just an ok look on my face as I said as I threw the box to the side, “Oh…it’s the silver be that I had asked for. Huh...didn’t really expected this to be honest.”

Forrest then asked me with a giddy smile on his face, “Well…do you like it?”

I then said, “Yeah sure, it’s cool I guess.”

I then took the silver bell closer to my ear and tried to ring it a little and for some reason, I didn’t hear a sound. I went to having a confused look on my face and wondered if there something wrong with my pony ears or the bell with it being all screwed up, but then I started to wonder where Forrest even got the bell and had it all wrapped up when we had found him outside. And then…it ringed in my ear.

And then I put it down on the food table and said, “Yeah that’s a cool bell…I guess.”

And then I went back to eating my food and Forrest just had a big, warm smile on his face as he said as he closed his eyes, “I knew you would love it.”

And that ends our little Christmas special. Yup…that’s it. No extra thing at the end, no nothing. That was it. And, for a special…it wasn't so bad. But now we have to a second Halloween special as part of our contract…and we have to go and deal with the headless horseman next…..ffffffuuuuuUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK!!!...

CREDITS:

Cast:

Knight

Wolf

Forrest Fire

Classy Jack

Neon Party

Arrell

~~TK~~

The B.F.I

The weapons store sales pony

The Red's Big Letter sales pony

Fake Santa Pony

Santa Pony

Rabbid Frog

Tiny Hippo George

The pony at the store towards the end with that one line

The guy on the record player

Teddy (Kill me)

Gust Starring: The Hitler Nugget

Forrest's Dad

Producers:

Ricky Dicky

Ricky the Dicky the II

Lumpy

Stunts:

Tim Whirl : Hitler Nugget's Stunt Double (Please help me, they're keeping me in a cage and feeding me only dog food. Please send help)

Crew:

That one Camera bitch guy

All the family members that the producers took hostage

Hey: It's me again

Yup: Another one of these

This took me: Forever to complete

I mean: Hell, it fucking sucks

But it's finally: Done

Happy Jew day everypony!!!

See you: For the next Halloween Special

Songs:

Fa la la la la...la la la la By: Some fucker probably...

Alone: By Forrest

Believe: From that magical train movie...yeah that one...

The producers would like to thank the following

All the hostages that we have taken

The Big D

Larry's Big Clapper

Wakko the Clown

Pedo Santa

Blight Movie Studios

The grease Boi

UPN in the year 2000

Time traveling

The scientists that we kidnapped and forced to make time travel possible so we could air this on UPN in the year 2000

All the dead scientist's that we had to silence to keep this quiet

The private Military that we hired to kill the scientists

Production pets:

Shemmy the rat

Mark the Rat

Spermey the Cat

Seriously Samsung

Rick Hoover

Ben

Production babies:

AIDS

Sue (boy by the way...)

9/11

The Holocaust

Baby Jesus

Babu Bajebus

My Bitch

A tiny hippo was harmed during the making of this Christmas Special

Animals were overseen by the Animal Rights Group

The Elements of Protection will return...it's in their contracts so they have to...

WHIPLASH STUDIOS

Author's Note

Hey y'all, sorry this took me so long to get out. It was not a good idea to try and do it all within one month. And I even tried to rush this as well at one point, but glad I didn't. Anyways, not much else to say other than here's the link to an alternate scene and that this whole Specials Universe will continue...at some point...and yes it is one long story....alright see you next time...

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 1
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 1

Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 1:

Dark, gloomy, despair, nothing, hopeless, and bleak. I open with these words in my journal right now to express what kind of fuck that we are all in. And I’m not trying to be funny here. Sure I started writing this journal after I had gotten it from Celestia and she suggested, “My student, continue your quest for friendship by writing everything down for me. It will be a very important part of your studies.”

I say that mockingly, but whatever. Here I am, living in Equestria, thinking that I can try to live a peaceful life on my own and shit. But nope, I end up being Celestia’s personal student and going through the same things that Twilight did in the show, amongst other things. And I have to live with these new friends that Celestia told me to get along with and shit. Oh, it’s what I did; it was what I was forced to do, thinking it was just another obstacle to get over so I can be left alone.

But after a few adventures, I started taking a liking to the guys, my new home and shit. Although I wouldn’t say I fully liked them yet. I was warming up to them though. It was alright, perhaps my peace that I was looking for. The freedom to go out and explore the universes while the ponies here expects nothing that I a human. But then it happened. The day came. The day we didn’t think that would come. The dread that lingers all over the lands… Neon… The fire rose, the skies blackened, the hearts all withered away in sorrow.

We were all doomed. We all knew Neon was something “special” but we didn’t think he’d do it. We didn’t think he would take it this far. We could have stopped him, we could have, but we just thought it was a joke. Just a little joke. A LITTLE FUCKING JOKE! Well who’s laughing now I guess? Who’s laughing now. Long story short, Neon caused a nuclear apocalypse.

And I’m not saying that he pushed a button or flipped a switch and caused a nuke to go out into space or have a bomb randomly appear form out of nowhere. NO! NEON WAS THE BOMB! And everyone paid the price for it; everyone paid the price with their blood, their souls, their lives, their dreams, and their ambitions! EVERYTHING IS GONE! EVERYTHING! There is no hope, no life, no dreams; we are all that are left here.

Me, Wolf, Mac, Arrell, Jack, Forrest, who is scared shitless… and Neon. This isn’t Equestria or the land of the happy Technicolor talking ponies anymore… no… this is the Land of Neon. This is Neon’s World now that we are living in. And in it, TK and Factory Dash aren’t in it. I don’t know for sure, but Neon may have killed them. I don’t have clear proof that he did kill TK, but it may have been possible.

There certainly is no way out of this universe to go out and see if he’s waiting for him in the outside of the universe anymore. I think he might be with Lawman now. And once more, I’m stuck in a universe, a world where I don’t want to be in. I could try though, try to scrap something together with what remains of this old forgotten world and try to remember what TK taught me to get out of Neon’s World. But Neon… Neon knows; Neon keeps us in check.

He knows and will just make sure to cut off our escape. He said after what he did with a smile as usual that we are his friends forever and that we will never leave each other. And according to him, the best news was that the Sweets had “retired” and moved on and now he owns the Party Store.

It’s his place of business where we all “hang out” at now. And honestly, it’s the only safe place left aside from our homes that survived the “explosion”. And it’s where Neon lives and thrives. The doom, oh the doom, we all have to live under Neon’s rule, and we are all doomed.

Ok now let’s get into what happened recently, the sooner I get this over with, the sooner I can jack off. Got to do something during the apocalypse…

Well let’s start off things simple. It all started off today over at the Party Store, while the rest of the town of Stalia and what surrounds it was for the most part, in a destroyed form or another.

The skies had a dark, vomit inducing kind of green to it, while the air was filled with a faint, yet visible fog that rolled in anywhere that it went. On top of that, the air stunk up wherever you went to, almost as if there was always a pile of corpses following you wherever you went to. There was even a sound that you think that isn’t there and it’s all in your head, yet it’s somehow there and that it will drive you to the brink of insanity.

A sort of low tone siren going off somewhere off in the distance, yet you can’t figure out in what direction it’s coming from layered with a constant groaning sound from somewhere nearby. And no matter how many times that you wash your hands… hooves… whatever, either it being in the mostly contaminated water or rare fresh water that happened to survive Neon’s fires, you always felt dirty.

The filth could never be cleaned off no matter how many times you may have tried to do so. And over at the Party Store, the design of it, both interior and exterior, was changed in Neon’s personal Image. The Party Store was almost similar in design to Sugar Cube Corner, well, when it used to be around that is, but now it was expanded with a decent sized open area so Neon and us could hang around and “talk” or whatever.

Alongside that, he had a kitchen, a set of stairs that were kind of big and circular in a way that led up to his room and the bathrooms and such. And to add to the theme of despair, the entire place, despite being changed into Neon’s way of thinking, was not in a clean state. Instead it looked like any other buildings that had survived. Torn, dirty, riddled with bugs and mold. Yet it was one of the safest places left in the world.

The walls were still sturdy and could be used as defense from any mutated zombies or other weird creature made up from Neon. Yet despite the security, the walls were colored of that almost of a rotten down prison, an even darker shade of green compared to the dark skies.

You’d think Ponyville would be good since the tree of harmony and shit. But that was destroyed too along with all of that remained of Ponyville in Neon’s second wave attack where he purged anything that tried to defy him. And now the only thing that remains of Ponyville is just the name, but then again he was usually with the guys in against Ponyville, so go figure. But still, it was all too depressing.

Oh and with a circle booth in the Party Store… it was a nice touch that Neon added so I do have to give him props for that…

Anyways, we were all in the store while Neon was behind the counter, trying to cook up something for us to taste test, all except for Forrest who was out and about in the remains of Stalia. As for us, I was just standing there, Arrell was at the booth, and Jack and Mac were over sitting at the counter, where Neon was working at.

And for Forrest, he was being brave being outside all by himself, but he needed to check something for us, but don’t worry, he had his saddle bag with him in case he found something that he thought was interesting for us to take a look at.

Anyways, Forrest was running outside and running towards the doors of the Party store, and as soon as he got to the doors with a look of horror and worry in his eyes, he opened the doors swiftly and soon after slammed them shut with his back, trying to breathe in and out heavily.

As he was doing so, he said to us, “No luck out there guys. I can’t find any toilet paper.”

As for the rest of, except for Neon who was minding his own business and Wolf who was just chilling in the corner, surprisingly taking this whole Neon thing the best compared to the rest of us, said in unison, “Awwwwww....”

Neon then said to us “Awww, that sucks for you guys… ha ha…”

Neon had his back turned to all of us as he was mixing something in the mixing bowl.

Jack then pounded his left hoof on the counter hard as he then said with an angered face, “This is bullshit! We shouldn’t have to put with Neon! There are 6 of us and only one of him! If we work together, we can take him down and try to restore society! He can’t take all of us!”

Of course Neon wasn’t too happy about Jack’s statements as his ears perked up when he heard that, so with his back still being turned to Jack, he turned his head a full one hundred and eighty degrees with the sounds of bones crackling very quickly.

And within Neon’s eyes, they were not normal as it quickly turned to black with small red pupils as his voice deepened into something that of a demon’s voice and said to Jack, “Are we going to have a problem?”

And Jack immediately coward in fear and started to shake a little as he then said in a Forrest kind of way, “No, no problem at all.”

Neon then said to him, “Good.”

And then Neon returned his head into a normal position and his eyes changed back to normal colors as well as his voice.

I then spoke up and said, “Well this fucking sucks. Guess we’ll just have to keep using the many unsold copies of “Ponies” magazine.”

Mac then spoke up with a bit of a curious look on his face, “How many do we have?”

I then told him, “Last time I did count, we had a fucking boatload of it. We should be good until the day we die.”

Mac then said, “This is fucking more shitter than fucking Applejack I tell ya! I’m sure she’s laughing at me now, having to wipe my fucking ass with fucking pictures with dead pony’s faces on it while she’s in the afterlife, chucking it up with their fancy toilet paper! Well damn you I say. Damn you all to the after after life!”

Mac shook his hooves in the air in an angered way.

I then said to Mac, “There’s no use trying Mac, I’m sure we are all fucked, even in the afterlife. I’m sure Neon did something to them once everyone died, didn’t you Neon?”

I looked over to Neon, wondering if he would answer me back. But instead, Neon just swiftly turned around and showed us what he was working on. It was an “Ice Cream Sundae”, but Neon’s version of it. Instead all it was was spoiled ice cream filled with cockroaches and pieces of dead bodies that were left over from the blast, all topped with blood from god knows where and someone’s left testicle.

Neon had a big, wide smile on his face as he said to us all, “It’s done! So who wants to taste test this?”

All of us, except for Forrest, said in unison, “Not it.”

Forrest of course sighed and said, “Oooohhh, why do you guys force me to do this?”

Jack then said, “We don’t, it’s Neon who does. If it was up to us, you’d be eating uncooked beans. And if it was up to me… well I’d just punch you and then steal something from you cause fuck you.”

Neon then grabbed a spoon from out of nowhere, don’t question him, and said, “It’s dinner time!”

Forest looked down when he saw what he had to try out as he took a big gulp.

But Neon assured him, “Don’t look so glum my chum. You’ll be helping me out trying to get my recipe down for the coming competition later today! The Ritual Blood Festival Challenge!”

As Forrest walked up to the counter, being forced to taste test or else face the wrath of Neon, Arrell spoke up, “What’s that?”

Neon then explained to us all, “Why it’s only the biggest and most honored thing in the world… as of right now… until next time! It’s where you go in front of the “cameras” where it captures your soul in its innocent state, and you have to perform a cooking contest. If you can make the best food out of the blood sacrifices and appease the Lord Bacniqu, YOU WIN AND GET TO KEEP YOUR SOUL! And the best part is that you get to perform in front of his loyal and undying loyalists that will tear you from limb to limb if you dare fail or intervene with his plans! Isn’t that amazing?!”

Arrell then said with a nervous laugh, “Yeah… that uhhh… sounds great… ha ha…”

As for Forrest, he hadn’t taken the spoon from Neon, nor was it there anymore, it was just there for show… from Neon, and Forrest was just standing there, hesitant to try the food that Neon had made. However he was following the conversation and he thought he could maybe slip out of this one.

But Neon didn’t forget as he immediately turned his attention to Forrest and slammed both hooves on the counter top and asked him with a big, crazy smile, “So Forrest, did you try it!?”

Forrest didn’t know what to say as he just stood there, frozen and said, “Uhhhh…”

Neon, unchanged in his look, said to him, “Well what are you waiting for!? DIG IN! DIG IN! DIG IN! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! COME ON, DO IT! OR ELSE!”

He had said it all with a big goofy smile on his face. As for Forrest, he took one big gulp, opened his mouth, and took a small, yet decent size bite from the ice cream. And once he did, he couldn’t help but wanting to gag, but he knew that if he wanted to remain alive, and his soul, he had to force himself to swallow it. And so, with all of his might, despite wanting to throw up right then and there, and didn’t wait to savior the awful taste and let it slide down his throat. And as it went into his body to be digested, he made a gagging sound from his mouth as he stood there, having a bit of a coughing fit. As for Neon, he just stood there, smiling, nodding.

And as soon as Forrest was done gagging, Neon looked at him and asked him, “So, how was it?”

Forrest, not wanting to upset him, and trying his best to speak after eating such an atrocity, said to Neon “It was… great Neon… ha ha..”

He had to force a smile on him, unlike Neon who just had one naturally no matter what he did.

And as for Neon, he couldn’t be happier as he said to him, “That’s great!”

And then Neon went ahead, turned around, went to the spice cabinets, and took weird potions that he concocted by himself, like three, with his hooves, and walked back to the counter and placed the potions on the counter.

He then said to us all, “I will try to do this new recipe on the rest of you guys now to see if it’s good enough for the upcoming competition!”

Then I said annoyingly, “Ok, let’s get this over with already.”

Neon then said while his pupils were minimized in his eyes, “Great!”

And then… nothing. Nothing happened, and yet, something did happen a few seconds later as a bunch of green slime erupted from the potion containers and immediately multiplied and grabbed a hold on to all of us, all except for Neon. And it was alive too, and a bit smelly. And with that being said, we all screamed in terror, not knowing what it was or what it was going to do to us, but Neon, Neon didn’t care. He just looked onward and said, “That’s good enough.”

And then Neon walked around the counter and headed for the door.

And right before he left us as we were stuck in our spots with the mysterious green slime attached to us, Neon looked at all of us and said, “Well I’m off to the competition, wish me luck!”

And then he left us, with no way out of the mysterious green slime.

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 2
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 1: Neon Probz Part 2

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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 2
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 2

Episode 2: The Best of the Neon: Part 2:

Continuing from where we left off at, but first a quick recap. Forrest was out and about on a trail in what used to be Stalia’s park, and then he found an unborn fetus that was somehow still alive.

He then came back, scared, as I then calmed him down. And then Neon busted down through with a corpse that I’m assuming he had just found from somewhere, possibly in the dumpster, and forced Forrest to a competition to whoever can be the worst at something… or some shit like that.

First it was cans, and Forrest had his can filled with nothing but baby spiders. And then the next challenge was painting the wall with children’s blood… and then he puked… let’s continue.

And yup, the challenges were not over yet. Neon had more in store for Forrest, and Forrest just wanted to be done with it. He just wanted to just go to bed or kill himself. In fact it felt like he was ready to let Neon take him, but of course Arrell talked him into trying to keep moving forward, as we can’t let Neon beat us. And in a way he had a point.

We can’t let Neon have his satisfaction. If we’re going to die, we’re going to die like Arabs and go out with a bang instead of being a frenchie cheese eater and go out like a whimp. So Forrest was encouraged to move on and Neon had all of us go back outside. With that part I’m annoyed with since it was so annoying to have to go back and forth, in and out, just stay in one place, am I right? Or am I right?

No, well fuck you then, this is my journal, not yours. Well, I think it used to belong to someone else, I think I see bits of blood here and there, but whatever. Moving on now…

So we were back outside mentioned from before. This time we were out in the park were Forrest was at earlier. Almost around the same spot from where he spotted the unborn fetus that was still alive, yet it couldn’t be found at. And once again, we kept our distances from Neon and Forrest.

And with that being said, Forrest looked at Neon with a bit of a frown and asked him, “What are we doing out here?”

Neon then said to him, while sort of staring out into empty space, “That’s easy! Sunburst said that it wanted to challenge you to an emotional state challenge. All you have to do is not show any emotions at all.”

And when Neon had said that, I was then promptly reminded of TK and how he was emotionless, well, aside from anger at times that is. But still, it only reminded me of how there was no hope for any of us by that point.

And with that being said, Forrest then said to him, “But, I’d lose since I do show emotion. I care about a lot of things.”

Neon just said to him, “Well good luck to you then Forrest, you’re going to need it! Sunburst here is a champ at not showing any emption at all! Isn’t that right Sunburst!?”

Sunburst the Corpse just stood there, with his head hanging down a little bit, moaning and groaning like usual and looking like he wanted to die and be free from the pain of Neon. But Neon just smiled back as the silence took over.

And after a few seconds of silence had passed as well as staring at Sunburst the Corpse, Neon looked back at us and told us, “Alright, now start heckling Forrest to challenge his emotions guys!”

And so we did what we were told since we didn’t want to die. Sure, usually most would die with dignity and die than to serve on their knees, but if we did die by the hands of Neon… or hooves… whatever, we would probably not go to heaven or anything and go to Neon hell or something.

So out of fear and just in general wanted to do this, we walked up individually towards Forrest and heckled him. As for Forrest, he looked worried and sad as usual in this broken world.

First up was me, as I walked up to him, no emotions at all and said to him, “Your fire stuff sucks. Get a better act you scuffed Rainbow Dash.”

Forrest then gave a little smile towards me as he then said, “Well that’s not bad, I’m honored to be a scuffed Rainbow Dash.”

And then I walked away.

Next up was Jack as he just walked up to him and said to him, “You’re a faggot.”

Forrest then just went back to a neutral look for this world, which was a little bit sad, but whatever, I guess it didn’t count, as he then said, “But you call me that every other day. In fact it gets redundant.”

Jack had said that with a mellowed outlook as I had, “Well you’re still are one.”

He had said that last bit with a bit of a squint in his eyes and an angered look on his face as he was walking away from him.

Then it was Mac who then had an ok look on his face as he then said, as he put his left fore arm around Forrest a bit “Forrest, I don’t mean to say this to you, but you don’t eat enough of my apples. The reason why you’re so soft is because you eat that Ponyville crap. Now what I suggest is stop being promoting that government crap and tries some of my home grown shit.”

Forrest then said to him, “But you don’t have a farm anymore. All the trees are dead.”

Mac then looked a bit surprised as he then said, “I don’t!? Then what hell was I doing this whole time when I was at home!?”

Mac had looked a bit pissed off as he had removed his left fore arm from Forest and shook it in the air instead.

I then said to Mac, “You just get drunk and say how much you miss Applejack because you don’t have anyone to be jealous of anymore.”

Mac then told me, “I did!? Those damn glow in the dark zebras are out there somewhere I tell ya, messing with my fucking mind! Even in the Apocalypse!”

And then Mac walked back to us, still being an idiot. And last up was Arrell who then had a bit of a more friendly look to him, and that made Forrest smile and appear to have a little bit of hope in him when he came near.

And once Arrell was near him, Arrell told him, “Forrest?”

Forrest then responded, with both still having smiles on their faces, “Yeah?”

Arrell then said, “You suck sometimes. And frankly you should be ashamed of yourself. No go neck yourself.”

And then Arrell walked away, and Forrest’s smile disappeared as he then said, “Oh…”

But none of that forced Forrest to show that much emotion.

And in a way, Neon was up, as Neon then said to Forrest, “Hey Forrest!”

Forrest then looked over at Neon’s direction as he was curious as to what he had wanted next from him.

In which case Neon then asked Forrest, “Guess what?”

And then a few seconds of silence had passed as Forrest didn’t ask ‘what’ this time. Instead Neon, seemingly from out of nowhere, grabbed the unborn fetus from before that was still alive with the help of Sunburst the Corpse, and put it front of him for Forrest to see. And with that being said, the unborn fetus was moving slightly and started to talk in a little baby voice.

The unborn fetus said to anyone that could hear it, “Ma ma… da… da…”

And then Neon with a smile, a bit crossed eyed, put a hammer from somewhere, in Sunburst’s right hoof, and started smashing the unborn fetus into a pancake as the blood splattered onto Sunburst the Corpse and Neon’s faces.

And as Neon was forcing Sunburst the Corpse to repeatedly smash the unborn fetus as hard as he could with the hammer, Forrest just went back to a disgusted look on his face, as he showed a lot of emotions now, but just stood there frozen, disgusted, wanting to cry for the poor unborn soul.

And after what felt like twenty one seconds of Neon just hammering away at the unborn fetus down to a pulp, Neon stopped and immediately yelled out, “Sunburst wins!”

And Forrest then asked Neon as he started to well up in his eyes, “How… How could you do such a thing Neon? It was a poor, defenseless little thing and you killed it?”

Neon then said, “It wasn’t me that did it, it was Sunburst! Yaaaaay for Sunburst!”

Forrest started to shed some tears, and Neon saw this which then made Neon tell him, “Awww… don’t cry Forrest cause you lost. It’s just a game after all. Now it’s time for one more challenge, a race! Loser takes all! You guys go on ahead now; Sunburst needs my help to practice for the big race! Meet me near the Party Store’s doors at sunset… or else!”

And then Neon walked off with Sunburst the Corpse, and far away from us. Perhaps far enough to where his ears couldn’t hear us talk. And once we did, we all walked up to Forrest as Forrest started to quietly weep… like a guitar or something.

And once we got close enough, we stopped and I asked Forrest, “You ok?”

Forrest then said, while still looking at the now dead for sure unborn fetus, “No! I can’t take it anymore! I just can’t do this anymore you guys!”

He then turned his eyes to us as he sat down on his pony ass and his eyes filled with nothing but tears and sorrow, “We’ve got to get out of this place!”

Arrell, feeling a bit sorry for him, “Forrest, come on there buddy, you know we tried. You know we can’t do that. And besides, I have an image to keep up with Neon, so don’t even.”

I then said to Forrest, “Look Forrest, I know you want to escape, I do too, unlike Arrell here. He has an image problem.”

Arrell then annoyingly looked at me as he said, “I do not!”

I then said to him, “You’re self centered sometimes Arrell, face it, you’re a prick sometimes.”

Arrell then said, with a bit of an angered look on his face, “Fuck you.”

I then said to him, “Yeah whatever.”

I then went back to talking to Forrest, “Look, you just have to face facts here just like the rest of us. We’re fucked. We’re fucked if we do this. We’re fucked if we do that. There’s nothing we can do Forrest. Sometimes in life, you’re just fucked. And there’s no ifs, ors or buts about it. So you can either sit there and eat it or you can join the rest of society and have some false hope that one day things will get better even though we all know it in our hearts that it won’t.”

Forrest then said, as he got back up on all fours, “But… but I’m a Pegasus aren’t I?”

I then said to him, “Ya.”

He then said to us, “And I’m Forrest Fire, where I can go so fast that I can create a Sonic Fireboom while setting things on fire right?”

I then told him, “From what I can recall… yeah…”

Forrest then started to go back to a mellowed out look on his face as he then said, “So, can’t I just go fast during the race and create a Sonic Fireboom and maybe even escape here. I mean surely he can’t…”

I then cut Forrest off and told him, “You can either die trying or live and make sure your soul is still alive. But by all means, fuck yourself over; we… kind of don’t care.”

Forrest then said, “You don’t?”

I then said, “Well don’t take it too harshly, I’m just saying we are all dead on the inside now, and you are our buddy so we do kind of care. But at the same time, hey, you want to fuck yourself, go fuck yourself then. See you at sunset buddy…”

And then we all walked away from Forrest, leaving him to fend for himself. He didn’t look to have been phased from our comments at all, so that was good, but he did just stand there, thinking about what I had said I’m sure.

LATER AT SUNSET OUTSIDE THE PARTY STORE…

And so we skip forward to the race, where we were just outside the Party Store and was waiting for the race to begin. Forrest was at the made up starting line that was made out of the left over children blood on the ground, and Neon had let Sunburst the Corpse go and be on his own, just like a bird letting the baby bird leave the nest… kind off…

Anyways, there was no sundown of course, but the green skies were starting to become a bit darker so that’s your indication that was sundown in this new world… the new normal I guess you could say.

And as Forrest had his legs in the ready running position, even though he would just use his wings, but whatever, Neon just stood there behind Sunburst, but at a distance and asked Forrest, “You ready Forrest!?”

Forrest then said, “Yeah… sure am… he he…”

Forrest had looked at Neon when he had said that with a forced smile and a nervous laugh.

And Neon started to squint at Forrest after he had said that, and went, “Hmmmmmm…” as if he was suspecting something of Forrest, while still attaining the smile of his.

But Neon’s eyes went back to normal size and he then said, “Alright then! The first to make a full lap around the entire town of Stalia Loses… Wins…Dies… GO!!!”

And then Forrest was off, at resounding speeds as usual and left a bit of trail of fire in his wake. As for Sunburst the Corpse, he was walking very, very slowly like an old grandpa that could climb up the stairs and fell down three times, and then blames it on the wind.

All while continuing the moan and groan in pain as he said, “Kill me please…”

But none of us ever did.

Anyways, as for Forrest he was so far away from us Neon couldn’t even see him anymore, and eventually went past the town and into the Everfree Forest. And even though he knew he was far away from Neon, he didn’t want to stop. He wanted to keep going. From the look on his face, he didn’t want to stop at the remains of Ponyville, or even the ruins of Cantorlot, not even to the now filled with dead fishes and whales beaches or any of the other edges of Equestria. He didn’t even want to try to go to one of the other countries and their remains.

No, he wanted to go far, far from this place, even if it meant to space, even if it meant the sun or the moon or a different planet. Yet even Forrest knew that no matter what corner of the universe that he was in, Neon would always be there, to find him, and to forever be his friend and to take him back, in a bad and creepy way of course. But Forrest wanted to believe that he could escape from this nightmarish world, so he kept going and going, faster and faster as he pushed his wings and his heart, oh god it was all so very fast and right before you knew it… boom, he made a Sonic Fireboom with him breaking the sound barrier and leaving an explosion behind his wake.

But that wasn’t good enough as he kept pushing and pushing until he couldn’t see what was right in front of him anymore. Yet that wasn’t good enough as he started to tear up a bit, not from the wind, but from the world that he was now living in.

And at that moment, he pushed himself even faster than he had ever done before… well… kind of… as he then blacked out. And here’s the tricky part that I was still able to capture but… it gets kind of weird, although what I am about to talk about, I have seen this before. At least from when we were telling each other’s back stories in a weird way and to what used to be the Three Little Fuckers.

You see, Forrest was in a limbo like state, a weird place where it’s just darkness, a Dark zone you could say, as Forrest had been here before as a filly on accident one time, but his memory was wiped. It’s a long story, and longer story how I know this, trust me if things were different, I’m sure I would be writing a different journal filled with an evil talking skeleton, a buffed up Discord, and talking computer OS’s I’m sure. But it’s not that kind of a world.

Anyways, Forrest was floating, in a dark zone kind of place, if you want to describe it like that, in a sea of darkness. Yet he could see himself as he opened up his eyes and awakened, not to the darkness, but to the shining of balls of light in front of him. And the balls of light moved towards him, and to be quick about this, these are called The Fates, or sometimes The Travellers, but whatever.

And there were many of them, but one that glowed a light blue got up into Forrest’s face as Forrest was floating on his backside.

And the Fate with the light blue light said, in a sort of high pitched tone, male type though, “Woah there fella, didn’t expect to see you again here.”

Forest then asked him, while being a bit dazed and confused, “Excuse me? Do I know you? Where am I? And what am I doing here?”

The Fate with the light blue light then exclaimed to him, “Woah, take it easy with the questions there fella. There are something’s that you weren’t meant to know, at least not right away that is. Just know that you were once here too and…”

And then a light pink light quickly rolled up next to the light blue light and told him, this time in a female high pitched voice, “No, that was another one.”

The light blue fate then looked to the light pink fate and asked it, “Woah, what are you saying, this is the same one, isn’t it?”

The light pink one then said, “No, that was a different one from a different universe, remember?”

The light blue light then said, “I don’t follow.”

The light pink one then said, “Remember, the Elements of Protection in that one universe that battled Punished God Discord, the one that tried to take the Universal Magic Theory and cause an imbalance among the rest of the universes?”

The light blue one then said, “That was the one? I could have sworn this was the one.”

The light pink one then said, “I just told you this is the wrong one. Just becareful, you can’t cause an imbalance here or else everything is going to be screwed, even The Inca is going to get pissed off at us.”

The light blue one then said, “Ok ok ok then. Now let me see here, which one is this one’s fate. Hmmm…”

As the light blue one was seeing, somehow… the destiny of Forrest’s fate, Forrest was just floating there, almost as if he was chilling along, watching the two talk.

And eventually the light blue one then spoke up and said, “Ah, I see here. You’re this version of Forrest then. Ok so listen up here, we’re going to send you back.”

Forrest then said, still dazed and confused in his tone of voice, “What? No… no no no… I don’t want to go back there.”

The light blue one then said to him, “Now don’t start crying, just listen to what I have to say.”

It then made a sound of clearing its throat and said to Forrest, “Now your fate is a troubled one. And trust me, an alternate one of your world would wish to be in your position right now as the alternates have it way worse. Just know this: There has been a corruption in your universe. A rogue thing has happened, and there is nothing that we can do to fix it. BUT, us fates have it in store for you that you and your other friends will be able to fix the thing that we couldn’t fix. So just hang in there and know that things will be good for you in the end. Ok? Ok… now let’s send this little fucker back to his universe and then we can grab some coffee, I ain’t buying though…”

And then in a bright flash of light, Forrest was then returned back to our world, his universe, and he was then falling lifelessly from the skies, high above the Everfree Forest. Yet he was unconscious as well at the same time, but as he was falling from the heavens, with his back facing to the ground, he finally was able to wake up and had his eyes wide open as he then saw something he had hoped to not see ever again… Neon.

Neon was on top of him, smiling, waiting for him to wake up, and as soon as he saw him, he said, “Hi, you missed me!?”

And then Neon punched him real good and knocked him out… all while in the air. And Forrest had blacked out again.

BACK AT THE PARTY STORE….

Forrest eventually came too as he eventually opened his eyes. And once he did, he was back at the party store, but none of us were around him, worrying about him. We were just chilling, trying to do our thing while Neon was behind the counter, trying to fix something.

And as he awoken Forrest, still a bit dazed and confused, asked, “Where am I? Was I just dreaming the whole…”

I then quickly cut Forrest, not looking at him and instead just lying down on my back on the floor, looking at the ceiling, just waiting for the time to pass, “Nope, you’re still here. We told ya…”

Forrest then gave a little whimper as he then looked down in the dumps and said, “Oooohhhh…”

But Neon then went over to him with his little chef’s hat on as he then said with a smile, “Cheer up Forrest, it turns out that you were the winner of the competition!”

Forrest then said, unchanged with his expression, “I was?”

Neon, with a smile and all, said to Forrest, “Yup! Turns out Sunburst was a fraud and rigged the whole thing to begin with as he got some ponies from Japony to help him rig the race! And it was found out that he tried to overthrow me and attempt a coup. But don’t worry, it’s all fixed now! I fortified it! And to celebrate, I cooked you a special treat! Unborn Fetus Fila!”

And then out of nowhere, Neon pulled out a silver platter of the same unborn fetus from before, but now steamed and cooked well done. And in turn, Forrest just vomited all over the cooked unborn fetus and passed out.

And from there, I then said to him, “Embrace the struggle Forrest. Embrace the struggle.”

And that was about for that day. We’ll see how the next few days pan out… but this was fun though… bye for now I guess…

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 1
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 1

Author's Note

Welcome back to more episodes of this thing... enjoy...

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 1

Episode 3: How Neon got His Hat Back Part 1:

Well, I suppose it’s time again for another entry into this living nightmare huh? Just another day in “paradise”… or should I say “Neon’s Paradise.” And Neon’s Paradise is pretty fucking badly compared to third countries, let’s put it like that. But I suppose it isn’t all bad. For starters, me and the guys are still alive… and when I mean by alive, we’re being kept hostages right now. And no one is going to come and rescue us just like that classic Iran Hostage Crises. And there’s no Ben Affleck coming to our rescue now.

But even then, someone like him would be a god send right now, anybody really who could come to our aide would be a god send, yet it is not I’m afraid. Well, let’s get the journal entry underway before Neon finds out what I’m doing, I don’t think he likes me noting everything that has happened down. Or else I’m a dead man… dead pony… whatever…

Well if you were thinking this next part starts off at night and at the Party Store, with Mac sitting at a round table, with a weird look on his face and maybe a cheese eater hat or some shit like that, looking and seeing beyond the fourth wall and into another dimension and saying, “This is a love story, about faces,”

Then you would a dead wrong mother fucker. And it’s because it doesn’t start off like that, what do you think this is, some kind of… parody show or story on some fan fiction website or something like that? Then you are out of your damn mind. I mean if that was the case, then I think I would start having a breakdown about my existence, I mean I can’t just exist as words in some guy’s computer screen… can I?

Ok never mind, so it starts off with all of us at the Party Store, sitting around, except for Neon cause he was somewhere else, being miserable as usual.

And Jack was moping around, sitting at one of the seats at the counter area on his back with a look of despair on his face and he asked out loud to everyone, “Oooohhhh, when will this nightmare come to an end?”

I then said as I was sitting down at one of the corner booths, putting my right hoof on my face, looking bored, “Just embrace the struggle, we will all go out easier that way.”

Forrest then said as he was on his back on the floor, “Do we go out easier?”

I then responded to him with a depressed look in my eyes and a slight sigh, “Honestly… I really don’t know anymore.”

Arrell then blurted out as he was looking out at one of the windows out into the apocalypse, “Why can’t we just pull out? Why can’t we just cut and run? We’ve been here for so long, wasted so much time, and probably cost the lives of whoever is out there still alive in this mess, don’t you think it’s time we just leave? I mean it feels like we have been here for twenty years and nothing was accomplished.”

Mac who was sitting right next to Jack at the counter top area while looking a little curious and realization look on his face and then said, “Yeah, why can’t we just leave in the middle of the night without telling anypony about it?”

I then said to the guys, “Well that’s fucking stupid. I don’t know who would be stupid enough to do a thing like that.”

And then I looked over to a blank wall, almost like I could see somewhere beyond the fourth wall myself. And in my head, I think I had just made a reference to something to somebody in some universe. And then that was interrupted by Neon as he had just came out of the back with his usual, smiling, psychopathic demon face on him like always.

And he was behind the counter, looking at Mac and said to him, “Hey Mac buddy, can you come to the back with me and help me out with something?”

Mac then surprisingly in a clam and quick fashion said to Neon, “Yeah ok, sure thing.”

And he then got off his pony ass, with a curious look on his face I might add, and walked behind the counter and followed Neon into the back. And then a few seconds of silence went by and there was silence. And then after that few seconds of silence, we then heard loud roars of machines that sounded mortorized and had very scary and pointy ends to them as we heard slice and dicing and Mac screaming out in agony in the back.

He was yelling out in pain, “AHHHHHHH! OH MY CELESTIA THIS FUCKING HURTS LIKE A MOTHER FUCKER! OW! DON’T TOUCH THAT! THAT’S IMPORTANT NEON!”

and we could all hear Neon say to Mac, “SORRY!”

And then we heard more of slicing and dicing and then it was over and few seconds of silence came to us a little bit more. And then that was ended as Neon came walking out with a smile on his face and with Mac’s literal skinned face. And then he looked over to Jack as Jack as well as all of us had surprised, yet disgusted looks on our faces.

Anyways, Neon went over to Jack and put the face on the counter top and said to Jack, “Now put your silly new Nightmare Night mask on Jack!”

Jack then had a look of determination in his eyes as he said to him, “No! It’s not even close to that season yet and…”

Jack was then quickly cut off by Neon as he then turned into that demonic black monster of himself like from the last couple of times where all of his body is blacked out, grows in size a bit, and he has red eyes and shit while saying to Jack while pounding on the counter top with force, “Put the fucking face on Jack or else I’m going to rip yours off and feed it to my pet Gibbly!”

Jack then had a look of terror on his face as he then put Macs skinned face on without remark as Neon then quickly went back to his normal self… kind of quick if you get what I’m saying.

And as the bloody, smelly skinned face covered Jack’s face and as he tried to put on a forced smile on for Neon, Neon then responded back to Jack with “Thank you!”

And then Mac walked out of the back, all calmly and shit, just without his face so you could imagine how we could see all of his muscles and exposed teeth and eye balls, yet he didn’t seem to be in pain. In fact I don’t know if he noticed if he still had a face on or not.

But he then came out strolling like nothing had happened to him and asked us all, “Hey guys, what are you all doing?”

Mac then looked at Jack and noticed something and said, while rubbing his exposed chin and having a curious look on his face, “Hey, you look different Jack. Did you get a haircut?”

Jack didn’t respond, he just stared at Mac, with his forced smile still on, but I’m willing to bet you could guess what was going through his fire filled head at the moment.

But Mac then continued to talk and said, “Wait a minute! That looks just like my face! It looks good on you Jack, where’d you get it?”

Jack didn’t respond, he continued to stare at Mac in silence with his forced smile on.

Neon then suddenly busted out some more of Mac’s skinned alive faces, I’m guessing he had made some copies somehow cause he is Neon after all, and then yelled out to us all, “I’ve got face masks for all of my friends!”

And then he threw them up in the air and each skinned face landed in front of us for all to wear. But none of us put on the face right away as we just had surprised and worried looks on our faces. We stared at the skinned faces, then back to Neon, then back at the skinned face, and then back to Neon who then leaned in a little closer without a word pretty much signifying that if we didn’t do what he told us to do, we’re going to be paying for it somehow. So with that response in mind, we immediately put on the skinned face of Mac and put forced smiles on a faces in silence just like Jack.

And with that being said, Mac saw all of this, was a little bit confused as to what was going on, and started to look a little disappointed and sad as he then said to us all while pointing his right hoof to all of us, “Oh, I see that... all of you also have the faces like me as well … he he… it looks good on all of y’all too… I guess…”

And then Mac’s head started to go low as he walked around the counter.

As he was walking around the counter, Neon shouted out to all of us, “It’s time to start cleaning up my friends! We need to make this place sparkle with the blood of the innocents before the TV crew get here to show off my baking skills!”

Of course the skeletons were going to come, and Neon wanted us to clean up this rotten hell hole for him. But we weren’t in the mood to oppose Neon and his wrath, so we grabbed whatever that was lying around since Neon didn’t really notice what we did anymore when it came to his demands... some of the time anyways, and we started cleaning.

Cleaning whatever that we saw that was in front us like for me example, I was just wiping down one of the booth tables with a dirty rag while Forrest was cleaning the ceiling with a dead rat’s body. Arrell was cleaning the counter with his hooves, and Jack was pretending to clean the walls with a mop.

As for Mac, he was trying to clean one of the windows with a piece of paper that read, “HELP ME,” from a survivor of Neon’s World that was surely dead by now. And Neon was walking around, making sure we were doing… something… and then spotted Mac with his smile always and noticed how he was down in the dumps and giving a sigh every now and then.

So Neon went up behind him and asked him while placing his left hoof on his back, “What’s wrong there buddy?”

Mac then explained to him, “Oh… I’m not feeling too good.”

Neon the offered him, “Why don’t you come up to the counter and tell me about it?”

And so Mac stopped what he was doing, dropped the piece of paper, and followed Neon to the counter were Neon jumped beyond the counter and started making Mac something to eat. As Mac was sitting down and trying to explain to Neon his problem, Neon pulled out a bowl, put two amputated testicles from some guy he must have killed, put children’s blood over it and put sprinkles to top it off with some bone marrow in a whip cream form and an eyeball on top for a Neon Sundae.

As Neon was doing this, Mac was saying to Neon, “Ever since the guys got faces like mine, I haven’t been feeling too good. I mean I like they are trying to go with my look and all, it looks good on them, but it makes me feel like I’m not special anymore. I’m supposed to be special, more special than Applejack. I feel like I’m stuck and I don’t know what to do.”

He was saying all of this while keeping his head low and sitting on his pony ass on the chair.

As soon as he was done, Neon then suggested to Mac, “Well what you need is a new face!”

Mac then said to Neon, “I do?”

I then looked back at the two and asked Neon, “Are you suggesting he goes out and cut off other people’s faces off?”

Neon then turned back into his demonic form real quick and yelled at me with a threatening stance and glare over at me, “GET BACK TO WORK KNIGHT!”

I then let out a little yelp and turned my head back to what I was doing and just listened in on the conversation.

Back to Neon and Mac, Neon then pulled out two faces and he said to him, “Her, try this one!”

Neon then slapped a skinned face on to Mac’s face, and this face was a bit familiar, thankfully Forrest wasn’t looking as it was Rainbow Dash’s skinned face. Now granted it could have been Factory Dash’s face for all I knew, but it was defiantly a Rainbow Dash’s skinned face that Neon slapped on to Mac’s faceless face.

And as Mac was still trying to process as to what was happening, Neon said to him, “You could be the face of an airplane going into the One World Trade Center!”

Mac then started to think about it in his head I suppose, as he had a little smile form on his face with his left hoof on his chin. And I suppose you could imagine Mac flying like Rainbow Dash into a building like the One World Trade Center.

But then that little smile of his disappeared as he then looked back to being depressed as he took the face and put it back on the counter top and said to Neon, “No, I don’t think that would work out.”

Neon then grabbed that other face and slapped it on Mac’s face with a fart sound attached to it and said, “Well why not be a firepony then Mac, where you could put the flames of all the screaming souls that I just burned as the ponies cry for help!”

Neon had slapped the face of a fire fighter pony, only catch was that this face was all burned to a crisp, but Mac didn’t seem to have noticed it. And once again, Mac had a little smile form on his face and was probably thinking of himself trying to put out fires and such.

But then that face disappeared as he then once again took the face off and put it back on the counter top and said in a sad tone, “That won’t work either. What about a face that would send me to the moon?”

Neon then said, “You mean Doge? GME? AMC?”

Mac then said to him, “No, I mean up to the moon and space that would be cool.”

Neon then said, “Sorry, we never went to the moon and it was nothing but Nevada! So that face doesn’t exist!”

Mac then sighed and said, “Oh… ok…”

and then Mac sat there for a bit thinking, but then stopped and asked Neon, “Is there a face that says I’m in an identity crisis?”

Neon then said with a smile, “Sorry Mac, I’m a good Christian Pony, I don’t believe in trans faces cause that is immoral.”

And then Mac then said while hanging his head low still, “Oh… ok then…”

And then he got off his pony ass and started walking out of the Party store, yet Neon didn’t stop him, he just let him go. As for the rest of us, we stopped doing our work and watched what was happening. And as soon as Mac was out the door, Neon looked to all of us, pounded his right hoof on the counter with a littler serious look in his eyes, and we all got back to work.

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 2
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 3: How neon Got His Hat Back Part 2

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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 1
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 1

Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 1:

Yet another day is Neon’s Paradise. Not sure what to say anymore other than another thing happened that is of worth writing down I guess. Well, where should I begin from what happened today? Hmmmm… Well, maybe I should mention it involves Arrell now.

Yup, it’s his turn in the world of Neon’s. Arrell, while he probably always had an identity crisis considering he never did too much when it came to the group, he definitely had his days… and this was one of those days. So we should start with earlier today where we were at the Party Store, all just hanging around like usual. Just standing around as the world outside was dying and scary, just like any other time, even before Neon. And speaking of Neon, Neon was trying to fix something for all of us, despite us not wanting to do anything with whatever he was making.

But this was Neon’s World, we had no choice. So as Neon was behind the counter, fixing and mixing with… things… that involved blood of little puppies I’m sure, we were all at one of the tables, sitting at the corner booths, all sitting around the circle table. And as we were all gathered around, we were just talking and trying to pass the time.

Mac was saying while in the middle of the conversation, “Only if I could fly like you Forrest and get the damn hell out of here!”

Forrest then responded with, “But… don’t you remember? I tried that… it didn’t work.”

Mac then said to Forrest, “Yeah but you didn’t try hard enough. Now what I would do if I had wings is that I would fly faster than you and still be able to carry one of you.”

Arrell then spoke up and said, “Nope, you wouldn’t be able to. Now with me, I may not be as fast as Forrest, but I would be able to carry one of you guy with me, maybe two. I’m that good, I got the muscles.”

Jack then said to Arrell, “Stop trying to talk like you’re tough. I’m the tough one here, you fucker.”

Arrell then said to Jack, “No need to use harsh language, but I understand it if you don’t have my good looks and charm. You don’t get these muscles without getting some of the ladies after all.”

As Arrell was saying that, Arrell was giving Jack that look that says, ‘Don’t worry, I know I’m better than you, and there’s no shame in it’ or that kind of look like he’s giving you the bed room eyes and you can’t help but think he’s coming on to you, even though you’re coming on to him in your mind. You know that kind of look. While Arrell gave him his slight charm of a smile and moving his eye brows up and down in a quick secession.

And Arrell towards the end even started to flex his right forearm as well, trying to show off his muscles, even though those muscles weren’t shit, but whatever. All the while Jack was looking a bit annoyed by Arrell’s words. And might I add that if Arrell could carry someone while he was flying, that person or pony or whatever would probably get stuck in his legs or something.

I mean, who would let someone just climb on to something that flies? That person or pony might fall off or get caught in some kind of landing gear and die, and that would be stupid and be on the one who commanding it all……. I think I just referenced something again. I’m getting some weird feelings from it too… gives me goosebumps.

Anyways, I then butted in and said to Arrell with a sort of cynical look in my eyes, “Your Ego is showing again Arrell.”

Arrell then started to look pissed at me as he said to me and looked me in the eyes, “I don’t have a fucking ego, you do.”

I then said to Arrell, “That’s what an egotistical person would say.”

Arrell, then being frustrated with me then gave a loud ‘ugh’ and then got out of his seat and said with an angered and annoyed look his eyes as he was walking through the exit of the Party Store, “I’m going out for a bit to clear my head.”

Forrest, with a worried look in his eyes, said to Arrell, “But what about Neon!? What if he finds out that you aren’t here?”

Arrell then said to Forrest, “Then you can take my spot and cover for me. I’ll see you guys later.”

And then Arrell went through the main doors and bailed on us, all the while Forrest looked over to Neon who was then staring back at Forrest with an evil look in his eyes all with his smile still being there.

And as soon as Forrest saw Neon’s eyes, he started to sweat nervously, not sure what Neon was going to do to him now that Arrell was gone and he was going to have to take his place. Sure, one of us could have taken Arrell’s place, but that’s why we have Forrest, he is a good friend after all.

MEANWHILE, IN THE PARK OF STALIA…

So Arrell went to the park in Stalia, once again, still destroyed and barren of most life. And Arrell went over to the bench that Mac sat down on last time, you know, when he didn’t have his face on that time… remember it? I member. Anyways, he was sitting down and started to have a depressed look on his face. And as he was sitting there, he gave a slight sigh and was looking at all the mutated animals and creatures roaming about that was made from after the blast.

You had a poor little doggy with no eyes but seven legs, a big ol’ mutated chicken that was now a predator and a big ant that was half the size of a pony with the legs of a spider, and with eight legs I must add. And there was a weird unknown creature that was made from the blast, it was kind of hard to describe since it’s unknown. Just know it was black, it was a predator, walked on four legs, and did not have fur, but like a weird hard scaly kind of skin, all with uhhh… sharp terrifying teeth.

Yeah just walking around, wasn’t doing anything but just walking. But Arrell was specifically looking at the ant one as the ant was just trying to look for food.

Arrell was then saying out loud after giving another slight sigh, “I miss when I had my animals back at my little cottage before all of this. I used to force feed the animals, keep the animals there against their own will, and even experiment on them and create new ones and take care of them, even though they spoke our language and asked me to kill it even though I would deny death to it. And Asshat… I miss you Asshat. Only if you were still here with me. You would be making my day and help me get through these times right now if you weren’t killed in the blast.”

Arrell then gave a depressed sigh in his voice as he continued to say, “I remember how you used to climb on to my back and we would do stuff together and you would help me out even though I’m sure you were autistic I think. Oh Asshat, those were the days.”

Then a mysterious voice from behind Arrell spoke up and said to Arrell in a very charming, deep, and male brit bong voice, “Those were the days indeed my dear friend.”

Arrell then shook his head to both sides to look and see who said that while saying, “Who said that?”

And then the mysterious voice said, “I did.”

And then Arrell looked to his left and right behind him, sitting on the top of the bench was a mysterious, normal looking black cat.

And he was licking his paws too, as Arrell asked him with a confused face, “A talking cat?”

The talking cat then said, “Yes, I couldn’t talk before. But after the… incident that your kind had, I was then soon made and now I don’t even age at all, let alone speak in a fluent language such as the one that your kind speaks.”

The cat had a warm little smile on its face while Arrell asked him, “Wow, and you’ve been living here... in this shit hole?”

The black cat then said, “Yes, well, it hasn’t been the best but the other creatures that remain alive are quite friendly once you get to know them, in fact some are just misunderstood. Perhaps you could understand them since you seem to be of their type.”

Arrell then asked the black cat, “If only I can do some weird shit to them that is probably against nature and god in every possible way.”

Arrell had said it was a little smile on his face.

And as the black cat was about to respond, he jumped down and sat down on its cat ass on the bench like how Arrell was, and said to him, “Ugh, never mind. But I am interested in you now. Do you happen to know a blue unicorn around? Perhaps even a green earth pony?”

Arrell then said, still with a smile, “Yeah I do! Their names are Knight and Neon.”

Arrell then started to have a little frown on his face as Arrell continued to say, “But you probably don’t want to meet him for… reasons..”

Arrell then had a curious look on his face as he then asked the black cat, “Why do you ask?”

The black cat then said, “Oh nothing. Just… curious is all. By the way, the name is Blacky.”

Blacky then extedned out his paw as a sign for a little handshake… hoofshake… pawshake… whatever…

And Arrell then said to Blacky with a smile, “The name is Arrell.”

Then Blacky then said in a charming tone, “I think we are going to be the best of friends there Arrell.”

And if you’re asking who Blacky is… or was. I don’t know how to explain it to you, it happened a while back. Let’s just a certain situation happened where it involved me being stuck in the woods somewhere in the north and that I was being hunted by a group. And some guy in that group named Blacky was a part of it if I’m not mistaken. And some guy named Sky I think too… didn’t happen too long ago too, like maybe a year or two ago…

BACK AT THE PARTY STORE…

So Arrell came back from the park as we were all around the counter, drinking some stuff in shake glasses as Neon was behind the counter. We all had sickly looking faces on as we were disgusted by what Neon had made for us.

I was asking Neon as Arrell was walking in on us, “What is this stuff Neon?”

Neon then looked at me and said, “It’s a blood shake! And not just any blood shake! Every one of your glasses is filed with a different type of blood mixed with other blood. So for example yours Knight, it has both Cat Blood and Fetus Blood… from the Slender Fetus!”

I then had a broken look on my face as I said to Neon, “Oh... joy… And you even killed that Fetus thing huh? Well… uhhh… I don’t know what to say.”

Neon then got a bit closer to me and then said, “Don’t say anything, drink up!”

And then Neon looked over to Forrest as Forrest was looking like he was about to gag, as Neon said to him, “And Forrest… since you let Arrell go, you have to drink his now… and I made it special for you.”

And then Arrell walked in with a smile on his face and Neon noticed. And Neon said with a smile, “Never mind, Arrell is back. Arrell, I made something special for you and…”

Arrell cut Neon off, in which case he had balls, “Never mind that Neon! I’m just so happy right now! I just made a new friend, a black cat named Blacky! And the best part, he talks! I just wanted to let you guys know that I’ll be a little late today when we go out to the gym, I need to go and meet Blacky about something. Well bye now!”

And then Arrell turned back around, ignoring our torment, and walking away like Neon wasn’t shit.

Neon then started to squint a little bit, meaning he was pissed, but for me, I had a curious look on my face as I put my right hoof up to my chin and rolled my eyes back as I was watching Arrell walking away and asked myself, “Blacky? Why does that name sound so familiar?”

Neon then said out loud to himself, with still his squinting eyes and smile, “Yes… why is that name so familiar?”

LATER AT THE GYM…

So Stalia has a gym, but it was basically destroyed from the blast. But it was kind of still intact with some gym stuff. Neon and Forrest was there cause I don’t know. Neon just wanted to do stuff with us, and one of those things was to work out. Sometimes Neon just surprises you, even when he has gone rogue. He just cares about our health.

And Neon and Forrest was already there, waiting on Arrell, meanwhile the rest of us were either at the Party Store or doing whatever.

As Forrest and Neon was waiting, Forrest asked Neon as he was hovering a bit in the air, “Where’s Arrell at?”

Neon then said with squinting eyes again, “Yes… where is Arrell…”

And then Arrell busted through the already busted doors of the gym and all with a smile and with Blacky… also with a smile.

Arrell walked in and said, “Hey guys, sorry I was late! Blacky was telling me the funniest story ever! Blacky, why don’t you tell them?”

Arrell was looking over at Blacky when he said asked him, but Blacky said with humbleness in his voice, “Oh I don’t think so Arrell. They don’t want to hear the boring story. How about we just get started what we are here to do huh?”

Arrell then said, “Well ok then. Let’s start exercising you guys!”

Neon just kept looking at the black cat with a bit of suspicion in his eyes. So the first thing they started to do was balance on big, dirty balls… you know those exercise balls, they were just dirty and covered in dust and stuff. But they still had plenty of air in them, and three of them to be exact, with a lime green one, a light blue one, and a yellow one.

Arrell had the blue, Neon had the yellow, and Forest had the green one as they were trying to do stuff with it, but the guys didn’t really get it so they were just laying on it and jumping on it, not sure what to do with it. But as for Blacky, he had a little sneaky look in his eyes as he was eyeing Neon, so he went over to Neon’s ball and popped it with his claw… so now we only had two balls now.

And as Neon’s ball deflated, and fell on the ground a bit, he just stared at the black cat still with a smile and squinting eyes. Next thing they did was running on the treadmills. They were broken, but the tread part was still movable. So all three of the guys were trying their best to move it and run, but of course Blacky spotted Neon, walked right up to him, and used his tail to trip Neon’s back leg.

And once Neon tripped, he fell flat on his face, but somehow you could tell he was still squinting at the cat without even looking at the cat. And the last thing they did was lifting weights. There was only one bar with a few heavy weights on each end, and it was Neon’s turn to do it. So he got on his two back legs, started to lift the weights in full with ease, and stood tall and mighty with a smile.

But then Blacky jumped up on to the weight and said with a charming smile, “I hope you don’t mind the extra weight.”

And as Blacky put all of his weight on the left end of the bar, Neon started to lose his balance and then fell to the left side, failing to hold the weight, all while having his eyes squint over at Blacky and with a smile.

But Forrest saw what was going on and had a worried look on his face as he then said to Arrell, “I think Blacky is starting to make Neon angry Arrell.”

Arrell, still with a smile on his face said, “What are you talking about, Blacky is harmless.”

He had said while doing that shooing movement with his right forearm.

LATER THAT DAY AT KNIGHT’S HOME / THE LIBARAY…

Stalia only had one library, and that was what used to be my home. And while Neon was gone, me and Wolf decided to go back to the house anyways and look at the books just because we were bored. And once we had entered our old home, it was still intact.

And as I had opened the door for me and Wolf, I said to Wolf, “Damn, it feels like it has been forever since we’ve been here.”

Wolf then said in a normal tone, “I don’t know, seems about all the same to me.”

I then had a curious look on my face as I looked down to Wolf right next to my right and asked him, “What happened to you? Who touched you?”

Wolf then said to me, “The day when alcohol stopped coming Knight. I can no longer get drunk off my ass so therefore I am having no feelings anymore.”

I then said to him, “Oh… ok…”

And so the both of us walked to the library portion of the home. And once we did and I turned on the lights, cause I had a backup generator in the basement, surprisingly Neon didn’t get to that after the blast.

And Once I did I looked at all of the books, and I said to myself, “Wow… even the books are still here, all untouched. Can’t say I have too many memories in this room.”

Wolf then said to me, “How can you? You never wanted to be here to begin with, and all of this was for nothing as we will all die one day and the sun will explode, killing us all and eliminating everything and anything we had ever done. This world is for nothing. Our lives were for nothing. And now a green pony will just mock our lives like how we mocked ourselves.”

I then asked Wolf, “What?”

And that’s when Arrell popped up behind us with a smile alongside Blacky as he said, “Hey Guys!”

I had jumped up a bit from that, but wasn’t too startled as me and Wolf then turned around and asked Arrell with a curious look on my face, “Arrell, what are you doing here?”

Arrell then said to me, “Oh it wasn’t my idea, it was Blacky’s.”

Blacky then raised his right paw up and said to me, “Charmed.”

I then still had a curious look on my face, I asked Blacky while looking at him, “Do I know you from somewhere?”

Blacky then said to me, “Perhaps… maybe it was very cold. Perhaps very dark and gloomy with a few others with em.”

He had said those last words with a little evil look in his eyes as he said them, but I wasn’t catching on so I said to him, “Uhhh… not that I can recall.”

Blacky then said, “Then no, you don’t know me. Shall we be let in?”

I then said to Blacky, “Uhhh… Sure… why not?”

And then me and Wolf backed up a bit and moved to the side to let the two in. As the two walked right on in, Arrell was looking around while Blacky was just watching me. But I ignored and shrugged it off as I went to one of the shelves and used my magic to get one of the books off the shelves, and as I was doing so, Blacky went up behind my left back leg and then got out all of his sharp, untrimmed claws, and scratched my back leg really hard.

As in so hard that my back leg started to bleed a bit, and once he had done that, and he had done it with a smile I might add, I jolted up, yelled a little bit, and dropped the book as I then had a pissed off look on my face as I then looked downward and stared at Blacky and said to him, “Ow, you little fucking prick!”

Blacky then went over to Arrell, as Arrell was confused as to what was going on.

I had then turned around to look at Arrell and said to him, “Arrell, your little cat friend is being a dick.”

Arrell then said with a smile, “Blacky? Pfft… he’s harmless. He wouldn’t harm a fly.”

Blacky didn’t say a word in his defense; he just smiled with a charm, innocent look on his face.

And as I saw staring at him, I still had a pissed off and annoyed look on my face as I said to Arrell, “Yeah… well we’ll see about that…”

And then two left because why not?

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 2
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 2

Episode 4: Neon-Pocalypse Meow Part 2:

And so we’re continuing where I left off, why am I splitting this up into two parts? Because I need a break like everyone else does, so shut up. I need to go and drain the fifteen and a half incher don’t you know? Anyways, where was I? Oh right, Blacky and Arrell…

So after Blacky had Neon suspicious and the little son of a bitch scratched the back of my legs and made me bleed a little bit, fucking prick, Neon called all of us except for Arrell to a meeting at the Party Store. By the way, the sun was going down and was going to be night time soon, so imagine that in your mind. Anyways, Neon had made us all come to the Party store and had all of us sit around the counter.

And as we were all gathered around Neon as he was standing behind the counter, Jack asked Neon, “The hell did you gathered us around for Neon?”

Neon then still with a smile no matter what, said to us all, “What have a problem gentlecolts. Arrell’s new “friend” is a threat to our “friendship” and something needs to be done about it.”

Forrest then said, “I don’t usually want to agree with Neon, but he is right, Blacky isn’t the cutest cat to be around. I’ll admit he seems nice at first, but he really isn’t once you get to know him.”

Mac then spouted out, “I concur! I saw that little snake in the grass go to talk to Applejack, and I think he is trying to throw a little coup against us.”

I then said to Mac, with a little annoyed look on my face and said to him, “That doesn’t even make sense. And you always see Applejack everywhere.”

Mac then had a little depressed look on his face with a frown and gave a little sigh and said, “Yeah… I know… ever since she is gone I have nothing left to live for.”

Arrell then suddenly came walking on in with a smile alongside Blacky and stood right behind and asked us, “Hey guys, what are you all doing right now?”

We then all turned around to look at Arrell and I spoke up and said, “We’re having a meeting about your new friend.”

Arrell then had a curious look on his face and he said, “What about him?”

Forrest then said to Arrell, “Well, while we shouldn’t be fighting each other, especially because of Neon and all, we all agree that your new friend needs to go.”

Arrell had an annoyed look on his face as he rolled his eyes at us and gave out an ‘ugh’ and said, “I told you guys this already, Blacky is fine. He’s friendly, he wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

Blacky then started walking up towards us and in front of Arrell and even surprised Arrell as he said, “I’m afraid they are partially right Arrell.”

Arrell had a little surprised, yet worried look on his face as he said to Blacky, “What are you talking about there Blacky?”

Arrell had even turned his head to the side a bit as well. Blacky then started explaining to us all, “While they are partially correct in their assessment about me, I really don’t care about you or the others. Really, I’m only after the ones you call Knight and Neon.”

Arrell, who was starting to look heartbroken, said to Blacky, “B-But… why?”

Blacky then started to turn around and look at the rest of us, specifically me and Neon as he then said, “You see, I’m not really a cat. More specifically a cat by soul. Let me ask you, do you believe in past lives?”

I then said with a curious look on my face, “Kind off… your point?”

Blacky, who was then looking at me, but throughout was looking at all of us, “Well, that is great. And it’s also great that you have a brain to think through about this stuff. You see, I had a past life and I was once a pony. A pony who used to be a sort of… bounty hunter you could say. I did some things, had debts to pay. And then one day someone by the name of TF came to me and wanted me to pay away that debt. At first I thought he was serious, and so I went along with him, on a little journey. He wanted someone so badly, so very badly, a blue unicorn that he was so pissed at. So me and a few others in a big group along with codenames, mines was Blacky, along with Mr. Brown, Grey, Star I believe the name was.’

We all went through quite a mess trying to find this unicorn. At first we thought it was going to be an easy, simple job. We blew up and derailed a train. Chased him through the woods, had a bunch cannibals try to go after him. Followed him deeper in the wilderness, found him and his little group at an abandoned and destroyed church, it was like hell to us all! And even though we killed his little friends one by one, sometimes easily, as they weren’t a match for us. They didn’t even have the skills to fight us. Yet, that blue unicorn was the one that we couldn’t get, he got away from us. And it turns out, our little leader TF, he was messing with me, he was messing with all of us, and it was all a lie. He back stabbed me and the others, especially the one that had the code name Sky.’

That poor young lad, he had his life ahead of him, and yet it was taken away. And my life was taken away all because TF was obsessed with you and wanting to see you hurt. And as it turns out, it was all a test to see how well you would do. And once I had died, I thought I was going to go to heaven at least, to see the one that I loved that died before The Great War. But I didn’t go to Heaven. Instead as my soul was ascending a little green earth pony jumped up and took me, and soon I ended up in a place called Neon Hell.’

I asked where was this place because I only have ever heard of Purgatory, but turns out there was another placed Hell, but not Neon Hell. I was tormented, tortured to what felt like a thousand years to me. But I didn’t give up hope, and soon my soul was able to escape that place, but not without a price. Parts of me are now gone forever, and the same for little friend that I brought along with me out of Neon Hell. And ever since I got out and somehow ended up in this cat’s body, I’ve been looking for the ones responsible for my death.”

I was starting to remember who this Blacky was, but just barely. I recall that little thing that I went through the woods, but I didn’t recall too much about that.

But I spoke up in my defense and said to Blacky, “What the hell did I do to you? I wasn’t the one that fucking killed you, that was TF!”

Blacky then stared down at me and said, “Oh but it is your fault. If it wasn’t for you, TF wouldn’t have fucked with me. And I wouldn’t have been in Neon Hell for a thousand years! And one way or another, you and Neon are going to pay the price.”

Neon the blurted out with a smile, “Not if I have anything to say about it!”

But Blacky just looked back at him with a sly charm of a smile and said to him, “Oh but I beg to differ my green friend. You’ll see.”

And then Blacky turned around without a single word, and walked away from and out of the Party Store. But for Arrell, it looked like he had just lost a friend that slightly reminded him of his pet bunny Asshat. And he didn’t say a word either as he just looked kind of sad while reaching his right arm forward, trying to not let go of Blacky, but Blacky left him. And then after a few second after Blacky left, Arrell put his right arm down and hanged his head low.

And from there, Jack got off with an annoyed look on his face, walked up behind him and placed his right arm on his back and went near his face and said to him, “Are you just going to let that piece of shit go Arrell?”

Arrell looked towards the direction of Jack with a sad face and said, “What can I do? He lied to me and… broke my heart a bit…”

Jack then said, “Cut that wimpy faggot Forrest shit out Arrell! You said you had muscles earlier, well what are you waiting for!? Huh!? Go out there and kick that fucking black cat’s ass! He’s smaller than you!”

Arrell’s sad face then started to turn into a determined one as he raised his head high and said to Jack while looking forward, “You’re right. He used me! But he isn’t going to get away with it!”

And then Arrell ran out the door of the Party Store, and Jack looked a little proud of Arrell, but Forrest was a little bummed out that Jack referenced him in his words. But we all soon followed Arrell out to see the fight that was going to take place outside the Party Store. And by the time we got out, the sun was setting, assuming you could see it and the night was about to take over the sky, assuming you could still see it.

And as Blacky was walking away still, Arrell caught up to him, but still keeping his distance from him, and said to Blacky with a mad look on his face, “Hey Blacky! I’m talking to you, you shit head!”

Blacky then stopped in his tracks and turned his head to look at Arrell, while we all caught up to them and stood behind Arrell, but Blacky had a slick smile on his face, as he wasn’t afraid of Arrell.

And then soon Blacky turned around and said to Arrell, “Yes, what is it my former friend?”

Arrell then said to him, “You aren’t walking away that easily! You come out here and fight me!”

Blacky then said to him, “Well… if you say so…”

And then Blacky started to levitate off the ground with his legs hanging down like he was meditating or something, but had full control of his two front arms as he just stared at Arrell with a smile. As for Arrell, he had wide eyes, not sure what to make of this little event. And without a word, Blacky made that little motion with his paw that said, ‘Come and get me bitch.’

And so Arrell shook his head to get rid of his wide eyes, and returned back to his mean and determined face, and started to charge forward towards Blacky, ready to raise his right hoof up and throw a bug ol’ punch at Blacky as he yelled, “AAAAAHHHHHHH!”

But to his dismay, as soon as he got close enough, Blacky raised his left paw, and threw the slightest punch, and that then sent Arrell flying backwards and into the dirt.

In which case, Arrell said once he landed, “Ow.”

As we saw Arrell land on the ground, we then all looked up at Blacky and Blacky was staring back at us. And as he did, he gave a little formal chuckle, and said to us, “So… you’re looking for a fight huh? Well then, let me introduce to you… Sky…”

And then from out of the ground, a black covered pony that looked like he was covered in black rock and water entirely, rose up from the ground as if he was rising from the depths of hell itself, and somehow Blacky was doing it all with his cat mind or something. And yes, it was Sky… rebirthed or something like that… And to say who Sky was, I believe that was his codename if I recall back in the forest back then. I really don’t know, I was kind of on the move, trying to Survive TF… and I’m not going to get into who he is as that’s a whole another story. But Sky was like some young kid who ended up getting tricked and ended up dying. Seemed to have been a good friend to Blacky too as far as I could tell.

And then Blacky then said to Sky, “Go and have some fun with Knight Sky.”

And then there was a low little growl that came from Sky and he then started walking menacingly towards me as I had wide eyes and wasn’t sure what to do here. I then looked around me and the other guys, aside from Neon who was just standing there, looking at Blacky, had stepped far away from me.

So Mac, Jack, and Forrest, who took ten steps away from me to the left of me yelled out, “YOU’VE GOT THIS KNIGHT!”

I then had an annoyed look on my face and looked at them and said, “Oh you sons of…”

I was then cut off as I was then punched really hard in the face by Sky, and my ass landed on the ground.

I then too said, “Ow.”

Meanwhile, Neon and Blacky was eyeing each other with no words. But then Neon started to rush forward and soon as Blacky saw this, he too rushed forward and as soon as they met in the middle and clashed with each other, all they did was started throwing numerous, quick little punches at each other, while blocking and dodging punches, all at a fast pace.

Sometimes Neon was hitting Blacky, sometimes Blacky was hitting Neon. And both had looks of hard determination to win this fight against each other. While that was all going on, I was trying to defend myself against Sky, and I didn’t have too much fighting I my blood, I was kind of in the middle you know. Can do some fighting, but not really, and can do some of the thinking, but not really.

And as I was trying to dodge some of Sky’s punches just barely as I was stumbling on my feet… hooves… whatever…, Jack was telling me, from afar, “Go for the nuts Knight! That always works for me!”

I then said to Jack as I was trying to dodge Sky, “His nuts is fucking rocks you dipshit!”

Jack then responded back to me with, “Well try anyway!”

I then responded back to him with, “Fuck you!”

And while I was dodging and shit, Neon and Blacky were still going at it, but Neon and Blacky started adding kicks to their methods with their legs…so yeah… Nothing really to add there, just repeating the same moves on a loop like dragon Ball Z. Anyways, as I was trying to fight off Sky, I was running away a little bit, but Sky was close behind me. And I kept my head looking back, trying to keep my distance from him. And then I spotted a rock near me, a medium rock, and then I used my magic to pick up that rock, and throw it right at Sky. But it did barely any shit to him as it just scuffed him a little.

And as I was running, and stumbling a bit in my steps, I said to him, “Stay away from me!”

But then I started to think for a bit, trying to see what I could do to get me out of this situation, and then I remembered that I still have my satchel on and that I had a gun in it.

So I then said out loud to myself, “Ah ha!”

I then used my magic, opened up my satchel, and pulled out my handgun that no one else was questioning about, and I said to myself quickly, “Huh… I forgot I had this.”

And then I used my magic, metaphorically took a holds of the gun, aimed it at Sky, and started shooting at him to see if that worked. It did not as once again, it only scuffed him a little, but only by a bit. But it did enough to where Sky gave a longer growl this time, like he was crying in pain or some shit like that.

And I then said to myself, “Well shit…”

And then I put the handgun back into my satchel, tried to think of another plan. Meanwhile with Neon and Blacky, they were going at it for a bit, almost like a scene where there needs to be some fucking metal playing the background with cool sound effects going on with some slow motion bits thrown in. It looked kind of cool, but whatever.

The important part here is that eventually Blacky missed a punch that he threw, while Neon dodged that punch, and instead threw one finale punch that would end the fight.

Neon threw a punch right at Blacky’s cat face, hard enough to where it sent Blacky sailing through the sun set sky and far away from Stalia, as Blacky was yelling out loud as he was soaring away from the fight, “This isn’t over!”

And Neon finally calmed down, went back on all fours, and with a smile. As for me, I was trying to do some thinking and finally came up with something. So I quickly turned my whole body to full attention towards Sky, as I kept backing up, but trying not to stumble on myself. I then fired up my ol’ unicorn horn, and fired a spell that Celestia had taught me many years ago back at her school when I used to be her personal student… since you know… she’s dead now cause of the blast. And I hit it directly at Sky.

And as sky was in the middle of throwing a punch at my face, the spell took hold, slowed him down and eventually to a grinding halt. And then Sky was frozen in place, not being able to move unless I used another spell to free him. And in the nick of time too, because his left pony hoof was about to hit me right square in the face.

And as I had stopped him just in time, I had a look on my face of relief, and said to myself, “Wooo… good thing I paid some attention in Celestia’s school.”

And then I stepped away from Sky’s frozen body, and we all gathered together, yes even the deserters, but whatever, we moved on.

And then we all walked over to Arrell who was still on the ground, as he raised his head up and was rubbing his head with his left hoof and looked a bit dazed and confused, he said out loud, “Awwww… what happened?”

I then said to Arrell, “We kicked your ex-friend’s little ass and now he isn’t a problem anymore.”

As I was saying that, Arrell was getting up from the ground himself and was looking at me with a worried and sorry look on his face.

He then said to us all, “I’m sorry that I didn’t realize sooner that he was only using me to get to you guys.”

I then said to him, “It’s fine, what’s done has been done, it’s in the past.”

Neon then also said, “It’s ok Arrell, some of the demons of the damned are going to come up and fight against us unexpectedly, it isn’t your fault. Come! I’ll make all of you a blood shake!”

And then we all looked nervously and said, “Uhhhhhh… yeah… sure…”

And then we all had forced smile on our faces and we were all walking back to the Party Store. And as we walked away, Sky, who was still frozen in place, made a low growl noise, pretty much saying, he wasn’t done yet… bum bum buuuuuuuuuuuum…

Alright, I’ll see you all next time I guess…

Author's Note

That's it for now, more in the future. See you until next time...

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 1
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 1

Author's Note

Hey, welcome back for more... about 17 more sets to go and then the finale... it's coming... like sometime in the future... don't worry about it...

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 1

When will it all end? When will it all just come to a fucking end? Why were we left alive? Why couldn’t we have gone with the others in the blast? Death is a preferable alternative than to life here. By now, we would wish a nuke or a cluster bomb to be sent in our direction, where it would blow off our limbs and toss it on to the deserted streets and let us die in one of the abandoned buildings. Just please, put a gun to our temples and pull the fucking trigger already… but that’s just me day dreaming.

In all honestly there is no way out of this hellscape that we got ourselves in. Well, that we were forced into that is. We really didn’t have a choice in the matter as Neon just exploded one day and in the blast took us with him. For all we know, this is Neon Hell and somewhere up above is the land of the living, where everything is fine and dandy up there. But I doubt it; else I think we would have seen some of the souls of the damned that we damned in the first place down here. Instead, the damned are the lucky ones right now, and for us it is only hell on Earth… Neon Hell that is.

But what about heaven though? Is heaven even safe from Neon’s clutches? That I don’t even have the answer to, but it probably isn’t. Hell I don’t even know of what God here is like in this My Little Pony universe, although I believe it’s a woman from what I’ve been told. I hope she can get in the kitchen and make me some soup… cause I don’t eat sandwiches that much. I don’t even know what I’m talking about anymore… just kind of bored really.

But ooo… Something did happen today, to Jack really. I guess I can log that story of him for now. So let’s see, let me look through with my magic and see what happened again and… alright, let’s begin. Hmmmmm hmmmmmmmmmmmm…

So it was a morning in what is now Neon World, and what used to be the remains of Equestria… specifically Stalia. And the morning sun was rising off into the distance, at least as best as it could. Neon sort of put the sun on auto pilot after he killed Celestia you know.

And with the dark green sky being thick and covering the entire planet I presume, since we never got contact from outside of Equestria, but it’s safe to assume everyone is dead. Or at least most considering the past events that took place. Like maybe at a ninety to ninety five percent of the entire world’s population being dead is my guess. Anyways, it was the usual morning in Neon’s World, and Neon was out and about, basking in his own creation.

Neon was gently galloping through the ruined and burnt buildings, frolicking through the rubble and debris like they were flowers in a meadow. He was dancing and twirling on all of the dead and rotten corpses that filled the streets that remained that didn’t immediately turned to ash after Neon’s little explosion from early on. And Neon was in a good mood, like a genuine good mood so that was good for us. And as he was heading back to the party store, he got up onto a hill like place in the town of what used to be Stalia and looked back as the sun was trying to break through the dark clouds.

He then said to himself, “What a beautiful day that I have made. My friends would so love to see this sunrise… especially Forrest because I know how he likes nice things. And if he doesn’t…”

Neon paused for a brief moment, and then his voice got deeper and scary sounding like a possessed demon, “I’m going to rip out his eye balls while pouring hot acid into his eye sockets while cutting out his tongue.”

And then a small, little screech could be heard from behind him coming from one of the destroyed buildings.

And when Neon heard that, he turned around behind him with his smile as usual and said out loud, “Oh, what’s this? Do we have yet another survivor that doesn’t seem to know when to die? Well why don’t you come out of hiding you little rascal so I can put an end to you.”

And then from out of the darkness and shadows of one of the buildings that was partially destroyed, out came a mare who was down low to the ground, like really low, with her belly barely dragging on the ground, and crawling like some kind of bug, came out. She had a long, rugged, bleached mane that looked like it used to be a brighter and more of a beautiful color, same with her tail as well. Her skin was all but of that of a dark grey with a hint of brown in it, with what it used to be of a bright tone of color that spread happiness and joy to everyone else.

Her teeth was that of an animal, ready to rip and tear meat from a bone clean off. Her nose was missing as well as her eyes. Instead, her eyes were depend and were nothing but that of a black, endless void whenever you looked into her eyes. Yet it seemed that she could somehow still see out of those eye sockets. And to top it all off… she still had some eyebrows so she could express some emotions if need be.

And when she came crawling out like an elongated spider, she hissed at Neon.

However Neon only trotted up to her lightly and hanged his head down to her level just a bit and said to her, “Why hello there girl. Aren’t you a cutie? You’re not supposed to be here. You don’t belong in this world.”

Neon then stood there, thinking for a bit while still smiling, “Hmmm… where could you have come from even? I was sure I had put an end to everypony in this sector. I could kill you know and use your organs for a pie that I am making for my dearest of all friends… but I think you will do just fine for something that I need…”

AT THE PARTY STORE…

And so as usual, while Neon went out, we were instructed to not leave the store. Not like that there was much to do outside anyways. We were all in our usual spots like always. Me and Arrell at one of the booths, Jack and Mac at the counter tops, and Forrest was just fucking about and doing whatever. I think he was flying or something and trying to find something to past the time on.

I said out loud to everyone, “Well this is boring. When will Neon get back?”

Jack then said while looking a little bit confident and looking like an asshole of some kind, and turning around from his seat to face everyone, “Well whatever Neon is doing, we all know it won’t be good. I’m sure Neon is cooking up his next plan for one of us.”

I then asked Jack as I put my right hoof on my cheek, while having a curious look on my face, “What do you mean by that Jack?”

Jack then said to me with a sort of grin on his face, “Come on, in the past, he targeted Forrest, Mac, and Arrell… kind of… I’m sure the next one he picks, that poor sap is going to have to go through some terrible and embarrassing. And I’m sure you’re next on the list Knight?”

I then asked him while having a look of annoyance on my face, “Why do you think it’s going to be me? What makes you think it’s not going to be you?”

Jack then said while being an asshole, “Because Knight. I think Neon knows deep down, he’s too afraid to single me out and that I would stomp a mud hole in his face before he even told me what to do. And I’m willing to make that a bet with you too.”

And then without notice, Neon busted open the doors to the Party Store and said with a big smile on his face, “Jack, you’re next!”

And once Neon announced that out loud, Jack immediately shivered up and scurried away in fear as he made a little yelping sound. As he was looking scared and cowering in fear, he looked towards me.

I had a look that was still that of annoyed one, but deep down I had a little smile on my face as I said to him, “You sure you still want to take that bet Jack?”

Jack then without a word, quickly got on all fours and crawled quickly to my booth and tried to hide under the table.

He then yelled out loud to me, “Quick, hide me Knight. Take my place instead of me… please…”

Before I had a chance to speak to Jack, Neon walked over to the booth and lowered his head down to Jack’s eye level and said with a perfect smile like always, “Oh but Jack…”

Neon’s voice then turned into that of a demon’s voice as his coat color started to darken a bit, “… There’s no escape for you.”

And then Neon went back to looking normal again. He then grabbed Jack’s left forearm without much of a struggle and pulled Jack from under there, and Jack felt the force that was Neon’s right forearm. And boy oh boy, it was strong. Deadly even…

And so with Jack standing up on all fours and scared on what was going to happen next to him while having a look of worry on his face, Neon said to him, “Now there’s a pretty young mare out there that’s going to be your date. I want you to go out there and introduce yourself to her… or else…”

Neon then very quickly placed a light blue bandana around Jack’s forehead as well as placing a small potion in his left hoof.

Neon explained to him while doing so, “So here’s a bandanna thingy to make yourself look nice and a drink that I want you to give to her.”

And right before Jack went outside to meet his new lover, Neon said to him lastly while his voice got deeper like a demon’s voice while he started to turn black, “And Jack… just remember… there’s going to be some bad luck happening to you nigga…”

And then he went back to normal and said to him while waving him off, “Have a good time you two…”

Jack then gave a nervous gulp, looked at the potion, and then turned around and left the Party Store. As soon as he left, the doors closed behind him, and we just all sat there, waiting for Jack’s return. As soon as Jack got outside, he saw his new mate, and she was just sitting, growling and barking like a crazy, rabid dog.

Jack then said to himself while putting on an angry look on, “Alright then Jack… you’ve been through worst… you can do this.”

And so Jack expanded his chest out a bit, put on a tough guy look and walked towards her and said, “What’s up babe? You look like a single bit whore and you’re a worthless piece of meat. So how about you do me a favor and either you suck my dick right here right now or go on a date with me later on.”

He had said it with such determination and with a tough guy act. And he looked like he meant it too as he strutted around, looking like he was going to beat up some other stallion if they tried to move on his girl. He had done it while carrying and holding the potion in an upright fashion too.

But as soon as he was finished talking, the crazy mare went crazy, screaming and howling and went all over the place and tried to get on to Jack’s back and everything while clawing him a bit. This caused Jack to scream a little bit in distress and losing his balance while trying to be careful with the potion as it tipped from side to side. But he wasn’t good enough and the potion spilled on to his bandana, and what came out of the container was a mysterious red liquid. The liquid then covered and repainted the bandana into a red one instead of a light blue one. And as soon as that happened, Jack started to hear the voices of the damned in his head and could feel their presence as the sounds of hell raged in his ears.

When he felt this, his eyes were wide opened as he then said, “What?” to himself.

As for the mare, she was able to get on top of his back and head as he remained still.

And after a couple of seconds of screeching like a banshee, she stopped, looked into Jack’s eyes and said in a normal tone of voice with a bit of scruffiness, “You sound like a hot guy. So yeah sure, I’ll go on that date with you. I’ll be here later, don’t be late.”

And then she got off of Jack’s head and just crawled very fast away. And now not only did some bad luck happened to Jack… he was going to have to go on a date too…

And from literally out of nowhere, the sound of a studio audience going “ooooooooooooo” happened, but Jack wasn’t concerned about the disembodied voices. He was worried about the bad luck.

BACK IN THE PARTY STORE…

So Jack immediately walked back in and we didn’t move from our spots.

He then looked worried as he then said to Neon, “What did you do!?”

Neon then said, “Nothing you silly! Now you better get ready for your date… and don’t forget…”

Neon then returned to being in a dark form with a demon like voice and said to him, “There’s going to be two more bad luck things happening to you. So you better be watching yo back nigga…”

And then Neon walked away and back to his own private studies. And Jack just stood there with big eyes like a statue, too scared to move or to do anything really.

So Arrell thought it would be best to maybe help him out just a bit so he got out from the booth, walked up to him and asked, “What was that all about?”

Jack turned around, worried, and said to him, “It’s the bad luck that Neon put on me. I don’t know what he did, but he did something.”

Arrell had a curious look on his face so he asked Jack, “What do you mean?”

Jack then said, “Neon hooked me up with this chick, not my type, but still, and I have to go on this date with her. And then this potion that Neon gave me accidently spilled on my bandana and now I’m hearing terrible voices and a scary place.”

Arrell then said as he mellowed out his look a bit, “Oh I’m sure that it isn’t that bad. You’re just being superstitious and…”

Jack then shut him up by placing the band on his head, and once he did that, Arrell saw a vision of all the souls of the damned that Neon killed, being burned in the fire and flames; wailing and screaming for mercy. They were surrounding him, trying to reach for him to help or to possibly drag him down with them all. And on top of a pedestal, was a burnt pony corpse levitating from off the ground and looking down on him with anger. He also wore a red robe that looked a little bit esoteric. And then Arrell pulled the thing off from his head and threw the band to the ground in an instant.

He then said while breathing heavily, “The fuck was that dude?!”

Jack then said, “I know right!?”

Jack then had a crazy smile on his face as he started to sweat a little bit, “But I’ve got an idea. Neon said that there were only two bad things left, so I just need to get the other two bad things done and out of the way, so that my date with this chick can go smoothly.”

Jack then put on a smile of a crazy person and Arrell just looked a bit frightened as he then said while backing up as fast as he could, “Get away from me! I don’t want your curse!”

Jack then had a look of disappointment as Arrell backed up and ran to a corner. He then looked towards me and walked over. I wasn’t worried and was all cool like.

He then asked me, “Quick, tell me you’re fighting somepony and that something bad is going to come from it? Like... you breaking through a wall in a fight.”

I then looked annoyed once again towards him and said, “I’m not fighting with anyone. Out of all of us here, I’m the only one who isn’t worried about what Neon does to us. Forrest is scared like always. Mac is too stupid to realize what is going on half the time. Arrell is in his own little world at times and tries to pretend it’s not bad. Wolf isn’t even a part of this mess. And you’re supposed to be the tough guy and be fearless about what Neon does to you.”

Jack then said with a nervous grin, “So… that’s a no?…”

I then said to Jack, “You’re on your own.”

I then got up from my booth and walked away, rolling with whatever was happening.

Jack then said while sweating bullets and gritting his teeth and putting a hoof to his forehead, “Oh no… what am I going to do?”

And so Jack needed to find a solution to his problem or else he was fucked. And not in a good way either.

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 2
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 5: Bad Thing No. Neon Part 2

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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 1
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Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 1

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 1

Has it ended yet? No? I’m still writing this? Damn it… I thought I was dead and that this was the afterlife. Like this is all that there was, just me writing… or that I’m just some text up on a computer screen and that’s what I reincarnated as.

Like that was my true purpose all along, to be ones and zeroes up on a computer screen for something to read and that was the afterlife… life after death. And that god is some asshole writing my own existence. Oh well, I might as well continue to log an entree in this journal, it’s not like there is anything better to do in Neon’s World but to be tortured. Whoever reads this, please… understand that it was all fucked for us. There was no way out of it.

Only depression and despair.

I mean, who knows, maybe you’re in a war torn country right now, at least you have a war. We lost ours in like a few hours, and even then it wasn’t much of a fight. It was just running away and hiding, hoping you wouldn’t be the next one to get killed, and for the vast majority, you were on that list. But what happened in the past was in the past. It’s time to move forward and think about the future… Neon’s future anyways that is. I mean it ain’t much, but hey… at least I’m still alive.

So I’ve got that going for me. Anyways, this next story that I have for you is quite interesting… as Neon’s target wasn’t me… yet anyways… but was rather himself. Oooohhhhh… very interesting right? So, where should I begin? Let me think about this for a moment… and uhhh… ok I’ve got it.

So it was in the middle of the night, and Neon was over at the counter in the Party Store sleeping while standing up and laying his head down on the counter top. For the rest of us, that’s unnatural, and uncomfortable, and would prefer to lie down while sleeping, but Neon is Neon, he could sleep while being set ablaze and it still wouldn’t faze him.

Especially with how he is now, there is no telling what he could do. We can only imagine really. As for the rest of us, we were just somewhere else, nearby really, doing our own thing and sleeping.

Except for Wolf, I think he was trying to jack off, but the stick figure porn that I drew for him just wasn’t doing it for him. He said it was kind of hot, but he wanted the stick figures to have more thicker lines, but I told him to go fuck himself… and so he did.

Anyways, Neon was asleep and within his own dreams, he was having a sort of nightmare you could say. And there was no Luna around or alive to help him out with his nightmares. In it, Neon was dreaming that he was at the kitchen studio with the whole competition and stuff from before.

He was working on another taping of the TV show The Ritual Blood Festival Challenge. And on it, Neon was at a small counter top, making a couple of cupcakes made out of livers and eyeballs.

He was doing good with the recipe that he was working with, but then the Lord Bacniqu said to him as Neon looked up at him, “Bat u kl-shu shiuma bla tina wini.”

Neon then said with a smile like always, “What?”

Then Neon looked down and the recipe that he was working on was completely gone. It had just disappeared from his sight and Neon was confused as to where it had even run off to. Neon looked from both left to right, wondering if it did run off, but he saw nothing.

Then the Lord Bacniqu said to him as Neon looked back towards him, “ClaKla but-tsu tsu, mina kisu little bitch.”

Then the two skeletons who were both at Lord Bacniqu’s bottom of his stone thrown were have grins on their faces.

The left skeleton, while holding on to the TV camera, said to Neon, “The Lord Bacniqu states that you are losing the challenge.”

Neon then said while still smiling, yet confused, “What?”

The Right skeleton with an even bigger grin said to Neon, “What he means by that is that not only did your ritual run away from you and is already long gone to some backwards Jewish country, but you’re losing the plot as well. Your friends don’t like you anymore. And they will overpower you and this shall be your end. You are now powerless. And there is nothing that you can do about it. And the Lord Bacniqu has stated that this shall be your punishment for not appeasing him.”

Neon then said with a smile still, “Bu-But my friends still like me. We’re going to be best friends forever and ever and ever and ever and ever. They would never leave me. I made sure of that. I-I can never be alone again… it’s impossible…”

Then the skeleton on the left said while pointing his left index finger behind him said, “Think again there Mr. Party.”

Then Neon, still holding a smile all throughout this ordeal of a nightmare, turned around, and all of a sudden, all of us was there, surrounding him in a semi-circle… except for Wolf. Not sure why, but whatever. And Neon just stood there and just kept on smiling, albeit, with a bit of a crack in it.

He then said to all of us, “What are you doing here guys? Are you here to cheer me on like the good friends that we are?”

We all then had angry looks on our faces… well the dream versions of us did anyways. And we were getting slightly bigger than him as the time passed as Neon shrunk a little as we talked.

The dream version of me said, “No, we are not here to cheer you on.”

Jack then said, “Yeah, we figured we don’t like you anymore.”

Arrell then said, “And that you need to pay for what you’ve done to Equestria and to everypony else.”

Neon then said while still smiling with some cracks forming, “But… but guys… I did this all for you! I did it for us! We’re going to be togeth…”

Neon was cut off by Forrest as he got into Neon’s face as he grew into a giant from Neon’s view, “We don’t want to hear what you have to say! We’re going to kick your little green ass!”

And then Mac said to finish it off, “And after that, we are through as friends. We are packing up our things and leaving you.”

We all then said in unison as we circled and enclosed Neon in a little space as Neon started to look like he was going to crack, “We’re leaving you! We’re leaving you! We’re leaving you!”

And we all said that repeatedly like twenty one times or so until Neon suddenly awoke from his slumber. Once Neon did, he immediately shot up his head, while smiling and showing his bright and straight teeth to the empty dining area of the Party store. It was still late at night, about roughly three in the morning at the ol’ witching hour and crickets who managed to survive Neon’s explosions were singing away into the night.

Aside from that, there was only merely silence with no one else around but Neon himself, standing behind the counter, as Neon scanned the room. He was looking around, sort of worried almost, almost like something was going to get him.

But then that silence ended once Arrell opened the front doors to the Party store as he came in with a mellowed out face with three dead baby looking demons circling around him. They all had little wings, looked like they were part mutated, and part burned alive, and appeared to have been foals who perished in the blast, yet somehow still alive.

They all had no eyes, only a black void, and burned bodies, all with sharp teeth like animals. Arrell walked in with all three of them, just circling around him and annoying him.

As Arrell got close to the counter where Neon was, Neon asked with a usual smile, “Arrell… what are you doing up so late?”

Arrell then said, “Well I was sleeping and stuff. But then I heard some noises behind the store so I decided to go check it out and found these little guys. I thought I could so some ungodly experiments to them, but they won’t stop moving and I’m bored with them and just want to go back to sleep now. I can’t seem to shake them off of me; you think you can do something about it?”

Neon then said, “Why are you asking me?”

Arrell then said, “I don’t know… maybe because you’re the boss now and stuff. I don’t want to ruin your little plans that you may have for us later so I thought you should do it.”

Neon then said, “Oh…. Ok then…”

And then Neon grabbed a meat tenderizer from behind the counter, and since Arrell was close enough the three dead babies were high enough, Neon just smacked all three in the head with one powerful bash to the skull in a row. Blood came out of their little fractured skulls as they fell to the ground, green blood that is, but blood still nonetheless.

As soon as all three collapsed on the floor, Arrell said to him, “Alright, thanks boss.”

Arrell started to walk away from Neon.

As he was, Neon just gave Arrell a dead pan look wile gritting his teeth, smiling and said under his breath, “I am not your boss, I’m your friend.”

LATER THAT DAY…

So it was later in the day, past the ol’ witching hour and past the night time experience. It was now morning in Neon Stalia and Neon was busy away, working on a new recipe for The Ritual Blood Festival Challenge that was going to take place later that day that he had to attend or else suffer the wrath from Lord Bacniqu.

So Neon was just smashing random body parts with a meat tenderizer like a robot in the factory over and over and over. Soon however, I came into the dining area and dropped an old box filled with an old camera with some film reels to go along with it. I was carrying it with my magic from the Party Store’s attic and plopped it in front of Neon.

I too also had a mellowed out look on my face as I then asked Neon, “Hey Neon, you think you can help set this up for me?”

Neon then stopped beating the meat and held the hammer in place as he just stared at me with his usual smile as he asked me, “Why can’t you do it?”

I then said to him, “Well since you’re the boss around here, I figured you should be the one who takes responsibility for these kinds of things. I mean I did find these up in the attic and assume that it’s your stuff. And I’m bored around here so I figured I’d watch it but don’t know how to operate. I figured you’d know how to do it boss.”

Neon’s left eye started to twitch a bit as he gritted his teeth and said to me, “Sure thing… pal…”

So Neon stopped what he was doing and assembled everything together over by the booths with the cloth screen and the film reels.

Once everything was set up, I looked over to him and said, “Thanks boss.”

As Neon was walking back to the counter to continue with his fine work, he said to himself underneath his breath, “I’m not your boss, I’m your pal…”

That’s when Forrest came flying in from up stairs and as he was flying up towards the ceiling and looking down on Neon, he was looking kind of pale.

Neon looked at him and asked him while gritting his teeth, “What’s the problem… buddy?”

Forrest, who was starting to look ill and was not having a mellowed out look and then sneezed real quick before saying, “I think I’m coming down with something. And I figured you’d have something to do with it. So you think you can fix me some medicine for it since you’re the boss around here?”

Neon then said to him while gritting his teeth and having his right eye twitch constantly this time around, “Sure thing… buddy… I’ll get right on that…”

And then after that, Jack came walking from the outside and walked into the Party Store.

After he came trotting in, Jacked with a mellowed out look on his face asked Neon while he was behind him, “Hey boss, I got a question to ask you.”

Neon then turned his head one hundred and eighty degrees all with the sounds of his bones cracking to go along with it.

He still kept his smile and then asked Jack, “Yes… what is it… ol’ chum?”

Jack then said to him, “Yeah I was looking around and was thinking of replacing my old jacket with a new one since you know… your explosion dust kind of ruined it a bit. I found a few new jackets that would fit me and was thinking of going for a new look. I just need your opinion on what the new color should be so I can then grave rob it from the dead pony later on tonight.”

Neon then said through his smiling teeth, “Sure… what are the choices?”

Jack then said to him, “Sure thing boss. The colors were blue, light blue, midnight blue, a shiny red, a very dark green, and a white. That and a slightly blacker black I guess I saw on a dead guy once. So which one should I go for boss?”

Neon then said while taking a few seconds to muster up the words to say it, “…Black…”

Jack then said while rolling his eyes and having a cynical look on his face, “That’s great…just… great boss. I’m already wearing black and you want me to go to black still. Well… whatever… you’re the boss… thanks for the advice boss… bitch…”

Jack then started to walk away from him and into the back for something as Neon then said to him as he was slowly turning his head back into the normal position like how it should be normally, “Glad to have helped you out… ol’ chum of mine…”

And then from out the back as Jack was going to the back, Mac was struggling to drag a bench through the store as he was pushing as hard as he could and closing his eyes while he did.

He then gave up, leaned on it with his two front hooves, and opened his eyes while having a mellowed out look as he entered the dining area and asked Neon, “Hey boss, you think you can help out with moving this bench here?”

Neon then looked towards him, with both of his eyes twitching and his body started to shake like a crazy person that was starting to break down would.

He said, while stumbling a bit, “W-w-where do y-you need it m-moved to compadre?”

Mac then said to him in an ok fashion, “Oh no, I don’t need it moved to someplace. I just want to move it.”

Neon then asked him, “Why?”

Mac then said in a dumbfound tone, “Because… Anyway can you help me move it boss?”

Jack then came from the back all angry like and then said to him while holding his right hoof up to him and said, “Woah, he isn’t helping you until he gives me a second opinion on what color he wants me to choose other than black.”

Mac then looked angry as he then said to him and shaking his left hoof at him, “Fuck you! He needs to help me move this bench around!”

As Mac and Jack were complaining to each other, I started to wail out to Neon, “Boss, the movie won’t start!”

Then Forrest said while still hovering in the air, “Hey, boss, I’m still sick and not feeling well. I feel like I’m going to throw up soon.”

And then Arrell came back from outside the Party Store and as soon as he opened up the double doors to the place, the three dead babies were circling around him again and he said, “Hey boss, they’re at it again! I need you to do something about it!”

As we were all busy talking and complaining and yelling, in Neon’s head, it was like all the voices from his recent nightmare, all talking to him at once. All of the five talking heads just yammering away at his little pony ears as Neon looked at all of us with a friendly smile.

A friendly smile that was slowly starting to breakdown and show some cracks, as if that smile was going to break and that he was going to go to new levels of insanity that we hadn’t seen before from him.

And as this was all going on, he said underneath his breath, “I’m not your boss… I’m supposed to be your friend…”

And then Neon just stood there, in the center of it all, not sure what to do with all of us, as his world that he wanted looked like it was starting to fade from him.

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 2
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 2

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 6: Neon Party Hyper Helper Part 2

Where was I before? Oh yeah, the whole Neon targeting himself without realizing it kind of… thing… let me continue on with what was happening from before. I’m telling ya, the whole two parter thing is just weird to me. I don’t know why I do it… its short stuff anyways. What am I? A fucking blue square that’s a greedy jerk dick that would put wings on anything so it can sell? … well I’m not…

Well anyways, let’s get back to Neon’s story. So what happened previously was that Neon had a bad dream of sorts, feared that we’re going to leave even though that’s kind of hard for us to do… otherwise we totally would ditch him to go to the mall and hang out with the cool kids instead. And then we started asking him for favors, started calling him our boss, and slowly he started to go insane. Now for the next part.

After all of us asked him to do something for us, we all just bickered where we were at in the dining area of the Party Store for what felt like hours. We just either argued with each other, or we complained and wailed to Neon about something that really isn’t important, but important enough for us to ask him to help us out.

All the meanwhile, the three little demon babies that Arrell brought in that were circling Arrell stopped circling around. Instead, they went ahead and started to circle around Neon. And as the three little demon babies were annoying him and going round and round in a circle, combined with our constant bickering to each other, Neon was… just standing there, not moving a single muscle. He was just standing there in the middle of the room like a statue. He wasn’t blinking.

He wasn’t breathing. He just stood there with a big smile like always and stared off into space. But deep within him, he was thinking. He was thinking about something alright, and that something is something that I can’t figure out, not even with my magic or the portal window as he just stood there… thinking.

About what, who knows what he was thinking, yet he was letting all of the sounds and little annoyances surround him like the air that surrounds us. If anything, it felt like we just became voices in his head, the voice that tells him things. Maybe some good things, some bad things, the bad thing that make you do bad thing. He was just standing there like a complete maniac, a psychopath.

He was already a psychopath, but if our wailing towards him didn’t turn him more into a psychopath, then I don’t know what would do that. He just stood there, watching nothing, just staring off into empty space as thoughts went through his head. And you can only imagine what was going through his head. Not even an insane person would be able to take what he was taking, yet he was starting to show some of the cracks.

He was starting to show signs of weakness that we could not see before that were not there prior. Yet he started to break, but not in terms of giving up and returning our once fruitful lives, but the breakdown of insanity, and evolving that insanity into something more that it is not. Turn insanity into something more than what you could possibly imagine and think up in your tiny little finite mind of yours.

He was beyond thought without reason or rationality. He was simply in a different plane of thought of existence, and what he was possibly thinking we may never know. But as he was just standing there, all cold and yet no bite, truly deep within something was growing. And what was growing was sure not be good in the long run of things. But soon everyone, including myself, was interrupted as one of the skeletons, the left one, from The Ritual Blood Festival Challenge came on by the Party store.

He opened up one of the double doors, and as he was standing in the door way and pointing with his right thumb out the door, he said out loudly as we all paid attention to him, except for Neon who just continued to stare out into cold space, “Hey uhhh Neon! We need you down over at the studio. The finale for The Ritual Blood Festival Challenge is about to begin and the tapping is going to start in about one hour or so. So I’m just saying you should probably start getting your things down here if you want to be part of the show. Just saying…”

And then the left skeleton left and we all remained silent to each other.

But eventually that broke as Arrell then said, “Wow that sounds like it was important boss. You should probably get going before it’s too late.”

I then said to neon as he had his backs to us, “Yeah, Arrell’s right. We should get out of your way so you can do your thing boss.”

Neon didn’t respond to us. He just stood there in cold silence.

Forrest then brought up, “Should we go down to the studio and cheer the boss on like last time?”

Forrest was still in the air by the way, still looking pale and everything.

Mac then said out loud, all calm like, “Ya, sure thing.”

Jack then nodded his head slowly as he looked at Mac and said, “Yeah we should probably leave now.”

And then we all in unison nodded our heads to each other with all mellowed out looks on our faces and started to head towards the double doors of the Party store.

As we were all leaving, I was the last one out, and before I left, I said to Neon, “Ok boss, we’ll meet you down over at the studio. Don’t be late boss.”

I then said to him as I headed out the door, “Alright, see you there boss.”

And then I left and closed the door behind me and the rest of us headed down to the studio. But Neon… he just stood there, not even saying a single word to himself. But the three little baby demons continued to run around him like some kind of playground equipment for little kids.

And he just stood there, staring into a blank, white wall… thinking about something and letting his thoughts roam his endless mind. What could he have been thinking then? Only god knows… and god was probably dead too.

LATER AT THE STUDIO…

We were all there, lined up from shoulder to shoulder, with me, then Forrest, then Mac, then Jack, and then Arrell, standing behind the cameras, waiting for Neon to show up.

I said to everyone as I looked at all of them, “Geez, it’s getting late, the boss should be here by now.”

Forrest then said with a bit of a worried look, “I hope he’s alright. I don’t want the boss to get mad.”

And then out of the blue, Neon arrived just in time as he slowly walked in from the right studio door and right onto the set. He then got behind the little kitchen like counter and stood in place, staring at us with his usual smile like before. Yet something felt wrong about that usual smile of his. It felt a little bit deceitful… well to me at least that is. But other than that, we didn’t see anything wrong with it.

And once Neon was in place, the left skeleton said while being behind the TV camera like always, “Alright, you got here at the last minute Neon! Now today what the Lord Bacniqu commands you to make is something out of the things that we give you. And the things that we shall give you are a dead dog’s head, a cat’s tail, some rotten fishes, and some dead kid’s organs and their blood for liquid purposes. Make something that will appease the Lord Bacniqu and you shall win! And if you do not, well like we said before, we’ll take your soul and what not……… BEGIN!”

And then a black plastic tube came down from the ceiling and dumped all of the ingredients on to the little kitchen counter top and then it left and went back into the ceiling. Neon then grabbed out a meat tenderizer slowly and started to pound the dead, rotten meat slowly, all the while just staring at us and not looking away or doing anything else. He just pounded the meat very slowly repeatedly.

But we didn’t care what he was doing as I then looked at everyone in line as they all looked to me and I said to them, “Alright, this is the part we need to cheer for the boss or else he’ll get mad at us.”

I then looked over to Neon and yelled at him, “Woooooo! Go Boss!”

Forrest then said, “You can do it boss!”

Mac then said next, “You go get them boss sir!”

Jack then said while raising his right hoof up in the air, “We believe in you unlike Forrest Boss!”

Arrell then said while using his wings to hover off the ground a bit and said to Neon, “Do what a boss does and show him who’s the boss… boss…”

And we just sort of repeated those lines, but in slightly different ways to Neon as he continued to slowly pound the meat away with the meat tenderizer. And somewhere in his mind, he was thinking again. And the cracks were starting to become more visible as his smile was starting to become off and move while his eyes twitched every couple of seconds. And the pupils in his eyes started to dilate, while his ears went backwards, and his body started to spaz a little bit with each passing second. Then his coat started to grow that of a darker shade of green. And then it got dark and dark and darker until his entire form became enveloped in total darkness as his eyes remained bright and white and pupils fading into non existence. And then the dam broke and Neon turned back into a demon that he did before.

He had a self contained explosion within and said out for all to hear in the studio, “QUITE!”

He got on his two back pony legs, as his form grew into what looked like an eleven foot demon. His width grew as well, along with his eyes that looked like they were going to kill us. His entire body was blacked out, and the only thing that showed emotion were his pupiless white eyes as his voice deepened and stood taller than us and looked down on us all, even overshadowing the Lord Bacniqu as well. And all around us, fire and flames rose from out of nowhere from the ground, surrounding us all with nowhere to run as Neon wanted to have a word with us as he looked like a giant to us.

He said to us, “I am not your boss! I am your friend! I am your buddy and will always be your friend as you will be mine!”

We were all speechless and all had wide eyes on our faces as we didn’t move a muscle since we didn’t know what was going on or how to respond to this.

Neon continued to say to us while moving his two forearms around, trying to convey his emotions from his blackened body, “I cannot let it happen again! No, I will not be alone ever again! We’re going to be here together forever! As friends! I won’t lose you… but… but you are making me lose you! You…you’re betraying, conspiring against me to leave me! You think I’m too stupid to realize it! No… I won’t let that happen! You’re going to see… you’re going to pay for it!”

Neon’s eyes started to look like they were on fire and he leaned his top half closer to us as he got closer to our face. As for us, we all flinched and stumbled back a bit, not sure where to run off to, but our bodies needed to do something in defense.

But Forrest then said with a sad look on his face, “But… Neon… we were your friends… But then you did something terrible. So we can’t really be your friend anymore.”

And even though Forrest was telling the truth, Jack then said while trying to sort of whisper to Forrest, “Forrest, shut the fuck up, he’s going to kill us.”

However Neon heard what Forrest’s words as he bent his back a bit as he looked up towards the ceiling of the studio and said, “Terrible!?”

He then got even closer to our faces as he leaned and said to us with a look that could kill on his face, “I’ll show you what’s terrible!”

Then the flames around us got hotter and more humid, as Neon raised his hooves up and was ready to pounce on us and attack us like the monster that he truly was on the inside. We all knew it was going to be the end for us, so all five us quickly huddled together and held each other since this seemed like the end as we screamed in terror.

And then suddenly… everything stopped. As in time itself froze… except for me. Everything went to a dead silence. The fire stopped crackling, the screams from the guys stopped echoing, and Neon just stopped growling like a monster. And when I saw this, I looked around, let go of Forrest, and looked around to see why this would have happened.

I said to myself as I scanned the room, “What the hell…”

I then spotted a sort of portal, but an unusual one at that as it looked more like a door that was opened to an endless white void.

And then a disembodied voice said to me in my head, clear as day in my own ears, “Well, what are you waiting for? Go through the door?”

The voice sounded a bit familiar, yet it sounded a bit different. But I looked at the door to the endless white void, and figured it was worth a chance to jump through. So as everything stopped in time around me, I walked through the door and into the abyss.

IN THE VOID…

So I was in the void, all by myself. The door behind me closed as soon as I turned around and there was nothing. Just whiteness and silence. Yet not that white to where I couldn’t see myself. It was like being in an endless room with the same usual gravity, all with me standing on some kind of weird ground and everything was white. The walls, the floor, the sky, all endless white, yet with no one else in sight.

I then raised my right hoof with a worried look on my face as I called out into the void, “Hello!? Is anyone there!?”

I kept turning around and around, hoping to see someone and perhaps see that source of that voice that was in my head. And eventually after turning around enough times, I spotted someone off into the far distance. It looked like it was another pony.

I then yelled out to the figure in the distance, “Hello!?”

But I got no response from the said pony, so I decided to walk up to it while having a bit of curiosity on my face. As I got closer, the pony had his back to me and the pony had a light green color to him. And as I got close enough, it looked like it was Neon. I was a bit worried, not sure what was going on, but then he turned around. Neon looked like his usual self while smiling at me. Yet this was a bit different. His smile felt like he was just the same ol’ Neon.

The Neon that was random and would do random things like kill people and go to random places and hide his true intentions, yet wouldn’t explode and kill us all. He looked more like his normal self. So I walked up to him and became face to face with him, while still be sort of cautious just in case I walked into a trap.

So eventually I stopped in like within five feet of his face and asked him, “Hi? What are you…”

I was cut off by Neon as he then asked me, “Hi Knight! Nice to see you again! Have you been playing with the chickens again?”

He then turned his head a bit sideways to me.

I then said while being a bit nervous, “Riiiight. It sounds like you… but… the hell is going on here?”

I was still scanning the endless void, wondering what this all meant and what it had to do with me.

I then looked back at Neon as he then said, “Do you remember this place?”

I then said to him, “No… I don’t recall ever being here. Why?”

Neon then said to me while I had a look of confusion, “Don’t you remember being here though before? The times that we had together? I was here too once before you know? And then you came.”

As I looked around the void, some memories started to pop in my head as I then said to him, “Now that you mention it, I do recall a place like this when you broke the fourth wall that one time we made the big bang you and I. But… what does this have to do with me? And why do I need to remember this place? We were barely in it.”

Neon then said to me, “No we weren’t. We were here forever. Don’t you remember?”

I then said to Neon, “You’re not making any sense.”

Neon then turned to his left as he then looked out in the distance as he then said, “Isn’t it beautiful?”

I was confused as I had no idea what he was talking about. But then I turned to my left as well and saw what he was saying and there was something there now. In front of us was a guard rail, and beyond that was an endless field of flowers and grass. It looked like a peaceful place and if you concentrated hard enough, you could hear some bird chirping off into the distance. It was like a whole another place right before my very eyes.

All the flowers were blooming and the nearby sky was bright as day. And into the far distance there were some hills, just with no one else around is all. It almost looked like a liminal space; a certain feel to it all. A feeling of that I had already been there, yet never had. I looked out into the field as we continued to talk to each other.

Neon said to me, “You know I saw him here too once.”

I then looked over to him as Neon continued to look outward, “Who?”

Neon then said, “Your good ol’ friend Lawman of course.”

I then asked him, “Wait… you saw him? Was he still alive or something?”

I had a bit of a shock look on my face as I asked that. But Neon just said to me, “Well… do you remember now?”

I started to look disappointed and was feeling like I was talking to a broken record by this point. So I gave a slight sigh and felt like I was getting nowhere with this. But then a hand touched my right pony shoulder.

My pony ears perked up and I then quickly turned around and saw a human like figure. He towered above me; his body was covered in stars and galaxies, as his eyes were pupiless and had no mouth. He also wore a black cape too. He didn’t look angry at me though, just kind of a bit serious.

Neon then said to me, “That’s our old good friend The Universe. Say hi!”

However I had no idea what he was talking about.

But then the so called Universe spoke to me in a deep male voice, so I guess he was a he and said to me, “Don’t mind him Knight.”

I asked him, “Who are you?”

The Universe then said to me, “You don’t remember who I am. But that’s ok, cause right now… I’m not really here.”

I then asked him, “What do you mean by that?”

The Universe explained to me, “I was once alive. I had control of the universe as you and Neon gave me from before. I was playing my part that you gave me as she was playing hers. But then… something happened to Neon that I’m not sure of. And I don’t think I’ll ever know what happened. But all I know is he took control away from me and now I only exist here. I am almost but a memory now. But I can still talk to you… here at least.”

Then he paused for a moment as the birds chirped in the distance beyond the guard rail and from the fields of flowers.

He then went on to say to me, “But that’s not important. What’s done is done and it cannot be reversed. At least for that universe that is. Right now, what you need to know is deep down, that is not Neon over in the universe.”

I then said to him, “Not him? It kind of feels like him though, just really hyper and wants to kill us all.”

The Universe then said to me, “That’s not true though. I can feel it isn’t him back there. I don’t know who Neon really is underneath, but that’s not him.”

I then asked him, “So he’s being controlled then by some entity? Was that the real him killed and replaced with some sort of copy?”

The Universe then looked out the fields of flowers and said to me, “No. I don’t know. I just know deep within him and his vessel, it’s not the real him.”

I then asked him, “Then what do you want me to do about it then? Why am I even here?”

The Universe then looked at me and said with sad eyes, “You’re here so I can at least talk to you; to send a message.”

He then got on one of his knees and got closer to my eye level as he laid his left hand on my right pony shoulder. It felt a bit weird and it tingled a bit.

He said to me, “You’ll have a role to play to fix Neon… one way or another. Either in life or in death. Neon is a demon now…or at least like one. He has a tendency to speak what he hides within himself, and you must help him confront that all the way through. And if you can’t… well you can help save his soul.”

I asked him, “Does Neon even have a soul?”

He then said to me as he looked deep into my eyes, “Yes.”

I then asked him, “But why me though? Why can’t I just run away? I just want to leave that universe and get out. I can just find another MLP universe and go over there and start anew and…”

The Universe cut me off, “No. You must stay there till the time is right and the job is done. If you don’t, this could potentially spread.”

I asked him, “What do you mean by that?”

The Universe said, “Before he took control, I was able to prevent the other possibilities of Neon exploding happening in other universes. Yours is the only one that Neon did explode in. If he explodes in the others… it can lead to massive, unfathomable consequences. Not just for the universes related to yours, but almost every one that exists. This is a little bit more than one possibility over the other. This is Neon taking control of everything and even reality itself.”

I asked him, “So what? You send me back in and I try to talk him out of it or something and then we all live happily ever after?”

The Universe said to me, “It doesn’t work like that. You’ll have to be patient and just wait. When the time is right, and you’ll know it one way or another, you’ll find a way to cure him. Even if it means you have to end him.”

I then asked him while looking a bit suspicious, “So I’ll have to kill him?”

He said to me, “Not necessarily. Hopefully it doesn’t come to that. You’ll have many moments to redeem him. But if all else fails, there is always one secret weapon that is sure to beat him.”

I asked him, “What is that?”

He said to me, “Your own mind Knight.”

And then he took his hand off of me and got up and looked down on me again. And then the door that I went through opened up and it lead back to where I left off back at the studio in Equestria. I turned around and stared into the timeless state that the guys were in.

The Universe said to me, “Now go. You and your friends still have to play your and their parts.”

Before I left as I had no choice but to go, I turned around and looked into his yes and asked him, “One last thing? Is that the real Neon… over there looking at the fields?”

The Universe looked over to the other Neon and then back to me.

He then said, “Maybe… perhaps. Or maybe it’s something else.”

I then said to him, “Ok then. Will I see you again?”

The Universe looked over to the fields of flower and said to me, “That I am unsure of. I wish I can say, but only time will tell if we ever do cross paths again. But I wish the best of luck to you Knight. And may you play your part right, and then maybe things can become what they used to be… a home.”

I then said to him one last time, “Alright then…”

I then turned around and started walking through the door way, but before I did, I told him while walking, “See you later… I hope.”

And then I walked back into the room as the door closed behind me from the endless white void. Time was still frozen for the moment as I just stood there and looked into the Neon’s demon form and thinking what the universe guy had to say to me.

I wasn’t near my original place though, near the guys. I was a bit far to the left. And then without warning, time resumed from where it had left off. From there, Neon was resuming his role of trying to attack the guys.

But then the Left skeleton yelled out to him as he was hearing what Lord Bacniqu had to say to him in a soft whisper tone, “You are disqualified Neon!”

Neon then stopped in his tracks and then had wide eyes as he then said in his demon voice, “What?”

He then quickly turned back into his original form as a pony and kept his smile though as he then asked the left skeleton, “Disqualified?”

the left skeleton said, “Yes, the Lord Bacniqu has disqualified you from the challenge. He said you have overshadowed his greatness and that you embarrassed him in front of millions on live TV so now you’re disqualified.”

Neon then said while gritting his teeth, “Really?”

The left skeleton then said, “Yeah. You can keep your soul and whatever… you’re just disqualified and stuff. You a lose… so go home and stuff.”

Neon then said, “Oh… ok…”

He then turned around and started to walk out of the studio.

The guys all looked at each other as Forrest then said, “I hope he isn’t mad at us.”

Arrell then looked over at me and noticed that I wasn’t right next to them and he then asked, “Hey, why are you over there? I thought you were over here.”

I then said to them in an awkward way, “Yeah uhh… I just really wanted to move away from you guys because uhhhh… you stink.”

Arrell then said, “Oh…. Ok then… that’s kind of rude but ok then.”

I then said to him, “Yeah well… put on some deodorant next time… or something.”

I then started to walk away. They all looked confused amongst each other, but then Mac said, “Well you do stink like the pigs I used to raise.”

Arrell then looked a little bit annoyed by Mac as he then said, “Sure… thanks… You know we haven’t been able to take a bath since Neon exploded right?”

Mac then said with a surprised look, “We haven’t? Then the hell have I been bathing in then?”

Forrest then said disappointingly, “That’s children’s blood Mac… children’s blood…”

Mac then said with a surprised smile, “Oh… well no wonder why I look so young.”

Arrell then said while squinting towards Mac, “I’m disturbed of you now.”

Jack then said, “I’m just surprised he hasn’t noticed till now.”

BACK AT THE PARTY STORE…

Back at the party store, Neon was there, smiling and not doing anything behind the counter. He wasn’t moving. And we all had made it back too by this point.

He asked himself through his teeth, “How… how could I have been disqualified? How could this have happened?”

We all gave each other looks of worry and then decided to chime in. I then said to Neon, “No Neon, it wasn’t your fault. It’s our fault. And as your…. Friends… we apologize to you.”

Forrest then said, “Yeah, clearly it’s because we kept calling you boss, when we really we should have valued our friendship and called each other who we really are together… friends.”

Forrest had set it in an honest way as he said while smiling.

However Jack looked towards him with an annoyed look as he said to him, “Fucking faggot.”

Neon then said while taking Forrest’s words to heart, “Do you really mean it guys?”

Arrell then said, nervously, “Yeah… yeah we kind of do Neon.”

Mac then said, “Well it’s also because you’ve kind of kidnapped and forced us to like ya and stuff,”

The four of us then said in an annoyed tone towards him, “Mac!”

Mac then said with a smile, “Just sayin’ is all!”

Neon then said with a now relaxed smile, “Wow… you guys are right. We are friends together, and no matter, we’re sticking together… forever…”

We all then agreed in unison nervously while having shifty eyes and looking the other way from Neon. And then Neon magically got a letter that popped up right in front of him that appeared in a sudden flame.

Neon then quickly opened it, read it, and said to us, “Great news friends! Lord Bacniqu said that while I was disqualified from the challenge. I was invited to the Blood Ritual to the Death Challenge. I’m going to fight Lord Bacniqu in a struggle for power! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!”

And that was the end of it. We just went about our day and I thought about what the universe guy said to me. Not sure what he meant by his words and what I was supposed to do… but I guess I’ll be finding out one way or another. Until next time… see ya strangers...

Author's Note

When there will be more you ask? I don't know...

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 7A: The Neon Less Trotten:
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 7A: The Neon Less Trotten:

Episode 7A: The Neon Less Trotten:

I’m starting to lose track of time…. How long has it been? Four days? Four weeks? Four months? Four years!? In Neon’s world, time is almost irrelevant. It’s also hard to tell the time in Jesse Jackson’s basement……… too soon? Am I hitting over the target yet over someone else’s basement? Is Jesse Jackson still alive back in my universe? Is Jesse Jackson even real to begin with? I don’t know anymore…. What am I doing here, why am I writing this? Oh right…..

The thing that keeps my sanity in this place that Neon has us under. This hell that we can never escape from as we forever stuck in a never ending loop of madness. Oh well, no crying over spilled beans…. Milk… whatever. It’s not like a milk salad or anything. So I guess what happened recently was The BlowTroops. And no, it’s not a sex thing or a kink thing, even though it does sound kind of a quirky kinky time to be in a BlowTroop. Hey, don’t ask, don’t tell, am I right? So let’s see where to start at…. Uhh….

It was just a normal day in Neon’s World. Neon was behind the counter keeping an eye on us like a hawk; making sure we were staying in our places and not doing things that he didn’t like. Neon would pretend be doing stuff like making a cake or spinning an ice cream shake; but really he was just mashing around what looked like clay or possibly some pony’s organs that he found. Who knew what he was really doing as we just kept to ourselves.

Neon would just stand there…. Smiling at us and locking us down with his frightful eyes. We all kept our cool though, pretending that he wasn’t even there as we minded our own business and did things to keep our minds off the depression of our lives. Yet, his presence could be still felt from far and wide and even up close with just his eyes. Wolf was still lying down, like a bump on the log and was ahead of the rest of us and given up just about on life. He was somewhere…. Doing something in the background that I can’t even tell you, even looking back on it.

He may have been jacking off in his own mind. Me, Jack, and Mac were playing cards in the corner by the entrance like usual as it was the easiest way to past the time…. I think I was winning…. But I can’t tell what games that ponies play…. See what I did there, I referenced a My Little Pony episode. I only know season 1 through 3 and I think 4. I don’t know, I left like in 2013, for all I know I just referenced a reboot of Night Court episode. That was a fun show to pretend that existed. Anyways, we were doing our thing, Forrest was in a booth reading a half burned book of some kind in the other corner; and Arrell…. Was somewhere in the back.

We…. Didn’t know what happened to him at the time, but he was fine as he was just trying to cope with his life. All was silent in the Part Store as the humming in the background in the green haze of the sky continued. But then all of a sudden a disfigured, scrawny looking deer came waltzing through the door in an official BlowTroop uniform, made from rags and other burned pieces of clothing found through Neon’s World.

It was also decorated with a yellow sash and some badges that looks like it was done by a four year old. The deer had a light grey coat color all with walking on its hind legs, an eye missing with the empty eye socket that looks like you could fuck it; and three antlers. He also didn’t have any eyelids so he couldn’t blink and his voice sounded like that of a fruit bowl that took it up the ass so much that his farts would probably sound like the wind. It also sounded like his balls didn’t drop yet.

Well the deer came walking on in like it was a normal, everyday creature with in his left deformed hoof holding a broken, rusty trumpet and in the other a scroll. As it stood by the entrance of the Party Store, our attention turned to the deer as he took the rusty trumpet to its mouth and blew the best he could. The sound was of course terrible as our pony ears (except for Neon’s) were flattened back as we cringed with our teeth. The sound of the attempt at making any music from the instrument was awful, yet felt a little welcome due to the fact that anything was better than Neon. After the deer sustained a note for at least eleven seconds long, the deer was about to say something.

I then looked back from my chair as I said with a pessimistic look on my face as I asked him kindly, “Who the fuck are you? And what the fuck are you? Can’t you see were trying to wallow in our own misery in our own healthy way?”

Mac chimed in with me as he raised his right hoof forward and an annoyed face, “Yeah! I want to be miserable in peace you damn varmint!?”

The deer then yelled out in his fruity, low tone voice, “I apologize, but I am here on behalf of King BlowHard on information on your request to join the BlowTroops!”

Arrell’s ears perked all the way from the back as he busted through the kitchen doors with a gleeful face as he yelled out, “The BlowTroops!? What took you so long!?”

As Arrell was walking forward, I questioned him with a brow slightly raised, “You know this jerk dick Arrell?”

Jack then looked a little angered as he sat back a little bit in his pony chair as he questioned as he squinted his eyes, “Yeah? How do you know him exactly? I thought everypony was supposed to have been dead?”

Neon then finally spoke up. He stood there like a statue and looked like he was angered too as much as Jack was, yet keeping his smile all the same.

He said through his lying teeth, “Yes. Unfortunately I didn’t get everypony when I had my “little outburst” back then. There are still some stragglers out there. And the ones that didn’t stay in the happy place had a slight…. Defect in the process of my rising….”

Neon’s neck then snapped towards Jack with a crackling sound as he looked at us with his dreadful eyes and smile, “There was sadly a side effect to my “fun” and it sadly caused some animals to mutate to the level of what ponies used to be. And they have since created a society of their own. I have yet to “cleanse their souls” and free them from their “holes”. I only haven’t done it yet because I have allowed them to exist in my world. And when I deem the time is right, I will rid them from existence itself and make sure they don’t even leave a mark in this world. I will wipe the slate clean and make it a world just for us and us only…. Buuuuddddiiiieeeessss….”

There was a moment of silence until Mac said with an innocent smile “Well good luck with that….”

Clearly Neon wanted to kill the mutated animals and the rest that lived without permission in his world, yet something was preventing him from doing so. What that was, I have yet to find out. But regardless of Neon’s point of view, Arrell was at least happy. I looked over to see him and he wasn’t even paying attention. He was happy for once in this dump of a land. And the fact that animals were upright and talking, it’s like all of his life’s work finally came full circle and nature itself imitated his hours of his efforts from before the blast. He was happy to see something that he was used to, especially since AssHat wasn’t with us anymore.

In fact…. I think Arrell was talking about the whole BlowHard thing for the last few days if I can think about it….

ONE WEEK AGO….

Oh yeah…. Looking back through my magic window portal thingy, Arrell was foreshadowing King BlowHard to us this entire time. Well let met write down the context for that, I’m sure you fine folks would like to know this too. So a week ago, Arrell was all by himself on the hunt for flowers that Neon had told him to fetch, yet doesn’t exist anymore due to the blast. Yet, Neon, in his all creepy fucking wisdom, insisted on Arrell fetching some for his “Special Baby Cakes.”

Don’t ask, but it involved some type of unborn fetus of some kind. Anyways, Arrell, in a depressed state, went out on his own and embraced the dark green sky. He looked upwards as he only tried to see what he used to see; a happy place where ponies could run around and talk and play. Looking around the remnants of Stalia only gave him the feeling of nostalgia for a time long gone that was taken from him by Neon.

The more he tried to think of it, the more he had hoped he would be able to go back to those good times. Yet, the more he stared into the abyss of destruction and decay, all he could feel was nothing. He was filled with a deep emptiness that he only gave a sigh as he hung his head low and walked quietly as his hooves clopped on the ground. As he was walking, a flyer was being blown by a nearby gust of wind. It just so happened that it was going towards Arrell’s direction as he walked right into the flyer. It covered his face as he quickly took his right hoof and looked at it.

It read, “Looking for hope in your meaningless life? Interested in learning skills to scam others? Want to earn useless badges to brag to others about? Want to know how to tie 7,144,121 different types of knots? THEN ENLIST IN THE BLOWTROOPS TODAY! Inspire to be like KingBlowHard even though you won’t amount to anything in life! Enlist with 5 other friends and receive free gum! Gum may cause a side effect of unknown diseases. KingBlowHard is not responsible for any possible deaths when joining the BlowTroops or chewing the gum. Send in your application with a 4 bit charge. No purchase is necessary.”

Arrell’s face lit up as he grinned from ear to ear. He was suddenly filled with hope and passion as he could only see a potential future in his eyes where things could be great again. I don’t know why he was so happy, a 4 bit charge to send in an application is outrageous I say! But hey, we all get scammed at times. Anyways, Arrell saw it and enlisted us without our consent….

And as we all know, and what a skeleton hambone once told me through some fiber optic cables, SILENCE IS CONSENT!

So you know, I guess we did agree to the Terms and Condition. But ever since then on that Fumetastic Day, Arrell has had hope ever since as he had seemed a little too happy around the store. Although if you ask me, I think Arrell was just happy to see some animals that he may or may not be able to torture ever since AssHat was gone. He had a hole in his heart to fill, and KingBlowHard was the next best thing for him.

BACK IN THE PRESENT….

So that was the context in case you needed it. You probably didn’t, but hey…. We all need a five hour prequel to explain where a flyer came from. It probably went through some bloodshed and some wars with some deep lore attached to it. You never know, maybe I can write that too, might be a best seller in Neon’s World and I’ll still get on the New York Times’ Bestseller list still.

Anyways, Arrell was standing there like a kid who is ready to beat his first pig to death at a slaughterhouse. You know, a kid who is in the family business at the butcher shop, but also owns a slaughterhouse, and that same kid wanted to sing and dance, but his Slavic based father said no to him or else he’ll throw him off the rooftop. So the same kid slowly goes insane as he starts to seeing Muppet like creatures in his closet telling him to cut himself every night despite that’s the Ritalin taken affect. And while he knows they aren’t real, he still does it anyways to feel something to fill in the void of his Slavic father telling him no.

So he slowly goes insane as he loses blood from his veins and decides that the next best thing in life is to torture and kill animals, and while you can’t do it for nothing legally, you can however do it for a paycheck at the slaughterhouse. And that’s where your hamburgers come from as the born psychopath guts the pigs while laughing until he bleeds out to death, to which the father will then spit on him because the kid wasn’t Slavic enough. Yeah…. That kind of standing.

Arrell was giddy as he looked at the representative and told, “Well, what’s the news? Are we in?”

I then blurted out with an annoyance on my face, “Who’s we? We didn’t sign up for anything.”

Arrell nervously smiled at me and said, “Oh don’t worry Knight, it’ll be fine, just trust me!”

I then stared at him while slightly squinting my eyes, “Didn’t you trust a cat that tried to kill me last time?”

Arrell then playfully brushed me off as he turned his head, “You’re still on that? Pffft, that was ages ago.”

I then looked at him cynically, “That was two weeks ago.”

Arrell then said to me gleefully, “And I’ve grown since then. Your point?”

I then said to him as I looked back at my cards, “I thought you were supposed to be smarter than me with all the fancy knowledge you have.”

Arrell said to me with a hint of egotism, “Of course I am, unlike you who lived in a library and didn’t use it to your advantage.”

I then said to him while still looking at my cards, “At least I don’t make animals that ask to be killed.”

Arrell shrugged me off, “Whatever.”

He then looked back at the representative and asked kindly, “So, what’s the final answer?”

Arrell was bending his pony knees a little bit while bopping up and down, “KingBlowHard has made his final answer, which usually doesn’t happen. Since you’re ponies, we would deny you, but because KingBlowHard has taken special interest in you, you have been granted acceptance into the BlowTroops! However, before we can allow you in, you must first past initiation!”

Arrell jumped up with a spring in his hooves as he was happy to hear the news; despite not being officially in just yet. Neon then crept up behind Arrell like the liquid terminator and wrapped his left pony arm around Arrell’s back. Arrell was undisturbed as Neon stared back with dilated pupils.

Neon then whispered into his right ear, “I think this is a great idea friend. Pass so we ALL can get in and so I can ‘meet’ KingBlowHard myself.”

Arrell backed up a bit but with a smile still, “You’re excited to join the BlowTroops too?”

Neon just stood there, still as a figure, “Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssssssss.”

Neon started to crank his neck a bit backwards, “I just want to meet the KING who was able to get away from my explosion and…. Start a society that I do not approve of.”

Neon’s neck started to crackle and bend even more backwards as he continued to speak like a deranged pony, “I just want…. Shake his flipper or…. Whatever the FUCK he is!”

Neon’s whole body started to twist and turns in ways I didn’t even imagine as he continued to say out loud for us all to hear, “And I just want to give him…. A GREAT BIG OLD HUG…. FROM ME TO HIM….”

Neon then went back to how he usually was as Arrell still looked happy.

He pointed to him with his right hoof, “Wow, I didn’t know how much you loved the BlowTroops. This couldn’t have gone better.”

Arrell then turned to the representative with a determined look in his eyes, “Alright then, we accept your initiation! What do we have to do!”

The representative then said lousily, “Well all you have to do is name the BlowTroops starter badges without looking at the free book we sent you.”

Arrell didn’t seem a little surprised, yet not taken a back as he said to him, “Really? That’s it? Well I was expecting something else like trying to carry a cherry with my ass or something but uhhhh… ok then…. All of them?”

The representative then said, “Yes, all of them, without cheating. It’s in the BlowTroop code to make sure who we’re letting in really wants to be part of the BlowTroops.”

Arrell stood there, a little dumbfounded and said, “Uhhh…. Ok then. Well let’s see there’s the…. Scammer Badge. The one with the skull I think on it?”

Arrell tilted his head to the side as he raised his right hoof slightly upward, unsure if he was getting it right.

The representative stood there like a conforming robot and said blankly to him, “That’s one, you still need to name the others.”

Arrell then looked to the ground while putting his right hoof to his chin while trying to think, “Let’s see, I know this. I can think of the names, I can think of it.”

Arrell then quickly looked back up with wide eyes as he answered another badge, “There’s also the, uh, one million and one knots badge. There is the Pitch a Tent and Sit on an Apple badge. And uhhhh….”

Arrell was having trouble thinking of the other badge names, as there was a few for beginners. Arrell opened his mouth a little wide as he tilted his head back as he tried to ponder the names. The representative waited like a good BlowTroop. Arrell tried his best to remember everything.

Eventually a little flicker of electricity went through his neurons and tried his best to fire off all of the starter badges, “Start a Grease Fire, Do the Pony Paddle, Do the Flipper Flapper, Scammer Two: Electric Boogaloo: Popcorn Edition, Can Drive These Nuts, Abuse the Elderly, Catch The Zigger, that’s a controversial one, Paint a wall, Feed the homeless animals, Pick The Lock and…. That’s it?....”

Arrell then started to smile nervously as his legs started to shake a little due to the pressure.

The representative then spoke out while raising his arm, “Almost, you’re missing one more.”

Arrell then looked down to the side as he gritted his teeth.

He said to himself under his breath, “Shit, what was the last one.”

Arrell then looked at us three, desperate for any help, “You know the last one?”

Jack and Mac didn’t pay any mind to Arrell while I looked back with an irked look on my face, “Does it look I know?”

Arrell then quickly looked over towards Forrest who was by his lonesome self.

Arrell asked him, with a tone of begging, “Forrest?”

Forrest sat on his pony ass, shrugging while trying to put on a smile the best his could. Arrell started to look a little worried as he looked behind him towards Neon, who was staring at him blankly behind the counter.

Arrell wimply let out, “Neon?”

Neon didn’t say anything. He stood still as he took out a pig’s head and slapped it on to the counter. Neon then took out a big butcher knife as he then sliced through the pig’s skull.

Somewhere in the background as Neon disturbingly cut into the pig, an eerie sound of a pig squealing could have been heard in the background; some say…. Neon was trying to imply some sort of symbolism to his statement about society. Arrell, with no hope, looked back at his demise towards the representative. His head was hanging a little low as he couldn’t muster the final answer. The representative looked like he was becoming impatient as he stood there, tapping on the ground.

The representative said, “I don’t have all day. Do you know the final starter badge or not?”

Arrell, trying his best to come up with some answer, was cornered metaphorically. Just like back in his school days on a surprise quiz, he couldn’t remember the final answer. Arrell gulped hard as his chest pounded heavily. He started to sweat as he could feel his pony skin start to heat up.

The representative said with only so much time left, “Well?”

Arrell couldn’t figure out what to say. Somewhere in his mind, he knew it, yet his brain was against him.

So without much left to lose, he blurted out what he thought was the final starter badge, “Scutter The Ludder?....”

Arrell winched up as he closed his eyes, thinking it may have been the wrong badge. As he was shaking, the representative looked down for a bit and let some seconds pass by.

He then said with a blank stare, “Alright, close enough. You and your Troop pass.”

Arrell, surprised and excited by the news, suddenly had a bright smile form upon his face. He then jumped up with pride as he raised his hooves up in the air. He cheered and looked around, still seeing us unamused and not caring at all. Arrell didn’t care though, he was happy to see some kind of hope return to his world once again.

Arrell took a step closer to the representative and asked out of curiosity, but with interest, “So, what happens next?”

The representative took out a scroll and was writing some stuff down.

He said with his whiny voice, “Oh uh, we’ll send you your uniforms along with your first task. Until then, let all of your members in your Troop know. And since you seem to give a shit, you can be the Troop Leader.”

Arrell perked up as his mouth made an “o” shape as he said, “Oh boy, the leader! It’ll be an honor to be the leader of my BlowTroop!”

The representative put the scroll down and said, “Yeah that’s great. See you later to check on your progress in the future.”

The representative then walked away, as if he couldn’t care any less and wanted an end to his questionable existence. Neon of course wouldn’t mind helping him out if he volunteered. Then again, Neon doesn’t care; he’ll do it against your own will. Hell, he is your will in this world that he has made.

Speaking of Neon, while we were all minding our own business, Neon slid to the back of the kitchen as he made sure he was all alone with himself. Once he was alone and Arrell was busy planning on what he was going to do for his new Troop, Neon started to converse with himself.

An eerie sound blew over in the room as a dark, deep voice, muffled started to say something to him, almost as if there was another entity in the room with him; yet you couldn’t tell if there was one or not. It mumbled something that only Neon could only understand. Neon started to nod as he kept his unusual smile.

Neon said out loud, “Yes…. Yes we shall put an end to this mess. IT shall only be a world for me and my friends…. And no one else.”

The deep, muffled voice came back as it said something, almost as if it was demonic.

Neon continued to nod without question as he said, “Yes, I shall use Arrell to my advantage. I need to get close to KingBlowHard and end his reign. His kind should not have come into existence in the first place. It was a mistake on my part. I shall right my wrongs.”

The deep muffled voice returned, hard to make anything out when looking back. And the more that I think about it, the less I know the better.

Neon started to shake his head in denial, “No, I cannot do it over night. He is protected by many, and it’ll take too much time and energy to get through them all. They can easily run away and then I will have to start all over again as they gain new ground. It’ll be a loop that never ends.”

The voice continued once more, almost as if it was behind him and said in a backward language. Neon then cracked his head and looked out the window and stared at Arrell. Arrell noticed that Neon was watching him as he turned around and waved at him, without a second thought to it all.

Neon cracked his head back to the kitchen, saying in a monotone voice, “Yes, he shall be the key to my victory and a key to my world. I must get close…. And then…. I can strike at the heart of the scum that remains in my existence….”

And so, Neon plotted his plans his head, trying to figure out the best possible outcomes if possible. I for one however was and am still concerned about joining some gay boy scout thing. Well, looks like it’ll be a new arc I guess…. Womp womp womp womp….

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 7B: Death of a Sales Neon:
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 7B: Death of a Sales Neon:

Episode 7B: Death of a Sales Neon:

And so a new arc begins in Neon’s World…. Neon’s evil plot to kill KingBlowHard. Granted most of us already knew that’s what he wanted the moment we saw the look on his face, so it isn’t surprising or anything like that. It’s just not subtle, but hey, what do we care if Neon wants to kill a dolphin or not?

He already killed everyone else in this world, might as well add dolphins to that list too. Still though, we didn’t want any part of this ordeal. We weren’t gay or fruity, and we certainly didn’t want to deal with any scout masters that would want to take advantage of us. Sure, we were adults, but when did that stop those bastards?

Regardless, we were held up against our own will, not because of Neon, but because of Arrell. Whatever hope he had left in Neon’s World was all hinged on being part of the BlowTroops. Some would say he was insane and coping and seething. I mean, it was mutated animals, why the fuck would he be happy to be part of this?

Then again, it was his fetish so I guess fair enough. But at the same time, no sane person would attach themselves to the name BlowTroops either. But who knows, maybe it was all comical and it was just there for show…. Or not. Either way, we were all part of the BlowTroops…. Even Wolf…. But he seemed to have taken it very well when we had to tell him he was part of the BlowTroops.

Granted, he wasn’t excited either and still felt lifeless, but it did get him moving a little bit. And truth be told, even if it’s just a little bit, it’s good for his health. Speaking of health, due to a lack of sunlight with the green haze covering everything in Neon’s World, staying healthy is a very important thing in Neon’s World.

That’s why I use Green Squeeze, the only healthiest drink to have in case of a Neon Emergency. And don’t ask what is in the Green Squeeze, I don’t know. And if you want to know why I tried to advertise the Green Squeeze to you, it’s because Neon knows we would all eventually die and suffer due to the lack of a sun. So he is purposely keeping us alive with making sure we get the vitamins and minerals that we need…. He just didn’t say how we would be getting our vitamins and minerals. Either way though, a nice, cool, refreshing Green Squeeze does hit the spot at times.

It keeps me going and with no crashes at all. Side effects include: Depression, suicide, thoughts of suicide, thoughts of jacking it off while hanging yourself, thoughts of existential crises, thoughts of Chevy Chase, bloated stomach, loss of ability to feel anything at all, fifty percent chance of cancer, a possible formation of Super AIDS, and a slight increase of potential death. Ask your doctor if Green Squeeze is right for. Buy now and enter your chance to win a tip for you and three of your friends to a shithole somewhere of your choosing. No purchase is necessary, you are liable to pay your own taxes in states of Illinois and California.

So aside from the Green Squeeze, it wasn’t even a few days before we heard more about the Blow Troops. A big boxed package arrived for Arrell and just left on the front porch of the Party Store at 3 in the morning, during the ol’ fashioned witching hour time. This journal entry has been brought you by Jerry’s Pitch Fork and Torches. Come to Jerry’s Pitch Fork and Torches for all of your pitch forks and torches needs. It’s even good during the Witching Hour to hunt for some witches.

Jerry’s Pitch Fork and Torches, There’s Nothing Wrong With Jerry. Neon didn’t tell me to put that ad in, Jerry who is still alive did. Don’t tell Neon, but he’s still alive and still wants to sell some pitch forks and torches. But I’m more surprised that there’s a pony named Jerry in this universe. That doesn’t sound like a pony name, but that’s Jerry for you. Good ol’ Jerry…. He’ll probably be dead the next time I see him. Neon always sniffs out the stragglers. At least he’ll die doing what he loved…. Selling pitch forks and torches…. Rest In Peace Future Dead Jerry. Rest in peace….

Anyways, Arrell got the box in and he yelled out through the whole Party Store, “Hey guys, it’s finally here. Come on down and see!!!!”

While he could have woken us up individually to come and get us, he rudely interrupted our boredom and sleep so we all groggily got up and stumbled out into the hallway and downstairs…. except for Neon. He just slid into the room like it was nothing with his usual smiling face. In fact he looked a little more giddy than usual, probably because of his plans and everything. By this point, none of us cared what Neon; we were at his mercy anyways.

And it’s not the good kind of mercy, but the scary kind. That kind of mercy where you’ll be beat up and hogtied and will be possibly illegally sodimized, until you realize you’ll be buck broken. But then you think about it, and buck broken doesn’t exist, but then a black guy comes in there and starts debating with you that buck breaking is real. And then he will ramble on how that the Egyptians and Mesopotamians from thousands of years ago had something to do with it while doing mental gymnastics. But then he keeps going and going and going and going and you eventually realize there is no end in sight to the debate so you end up slapping him. The black guy then calls foul and cries like a little bitch as he calls you a racist as he runs off. You don’t know where he goes but probably ends up in a sewer somewhere. And then when you least suspect it, you’re getting buck broken mentally…. And thus the cycle continues…. That kind of mercy.

Anyways, we all stumbled into the lobby of the Party Store…. I guess you call it that…. The dining area? Whatever, we were all there and while we were all annoyed, we were there with ears, ready to listen to Arrell.

He said to us all as he puffed out his chest in pride, “Attention BlowTroop Recurits! Line up straight and report for duty!”

I then said with cynicism in my voice and my eyes wanting to go back to rest as I remained a little groggy, “How about shut the fuck up.”

Jack was right behind me on this, and totally not in a gay way, and said as he had circles under his eyes, “Yeah, why can’t we do this some other time. I was busy dreaming of Forrest?”

Forrest seemed a little flattered by it as he fluttered in the air a bit as he asked kindly, “Was it a pleasant dream of me Jack?”

Jack only shifted his eyes towards him as he was pestered just by his presence, “No, I was teaching a certain faggot not to speak when not spoken to.”

Forrest then landed back down on the ground as his moral dropped to an all time low.

He hanged his head low with a little depression, “You could have at least been soft on me.”

Jack grunted as he said to him, “I’ll never will with you.”

Arrell however ignored all of that and said with a prideful smile, “Maybe other ponies who are lazy and don’t want to do work would put it off for later. But we’re official BlowTroops now! We represent this organization and we must do it with pride as we uphold the BlowTroop Code!”

Arrell held on to a huge smile as he closed his eyes and tried to make his back straight like a pole.

Mac then blurted out, “What code?”

Arrell then opened his eyes and then tried to think. He then started to seem a little uncertain about it as he put his right hoof to this chin and went, ‘hmmmmm’. He stood there as we waited as I started to feel like it was all coming apart. Arrell eventually came up with a small answer that seemed believable enough to put in the energy today.

Arrell said with a pride filled smile once more, “It is to scam Non-BlowTroop members and make it look cool that we can tie many different types of knots!”

I said underneath my breath as I looked around for something to perk me up a bit, “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

Let’s be honest here, the only difference the BlowTroops and the BoyScouts of America is that the BlowTroops don’t have the lust for little boy’s butt. So in a sense, it was ethical to join the BlowTroops.

And I guess since I’m in it now, Join the BlowTroops today! You can trust us, age ISN’T just a number. And sign up a friend the same day and you’ll get some cheap chewing gum for free. Arrell made me do it…. Plus I want to earn my Advertising badge. Hopefully I have been a wonderful psyop for you today thus far as you read this in the future.

Anyways, after Arrell opened the box and gave us all of our uniforms; we all lined up outside of the Party Store in the green fog filled sky, Neon included. The uniforms themselves were rather simple as they were all the same format, yet each one was unique in their design. This was mostly due to it being all made of rags and scraps found out in the depressed wastelands, but hey, we got some mix and match stitched together in the universe.

It was mostly dull colors though with one long sash around our chests that was surprisingly made out of that cheap velvet you see sometimes in store departments at the mall. We had no badges on other than a badge that shows a little dolphin named BlowHard Jr.

It was to symbolize that we were merely children in this organization, and into the metaphorical adult hood, we had to pay our taxes. That’s why, it’s always best to keep your gun loaded at all times and know exactly where the important parts of your brain are. They can’t collect if you’re dead. Just leave it for the uncle you don’t like. They’ll pay…. They always pay in the end…..

Anyways, we were all lined up and ready for our first day of the BlowTroops. We were all standing in unison in our uniforms, and while we weren’t straight, we were straighter than the United stated Military. Hey, don’t ask, don’t tell, am I right?....

We were mostly unamused, but hey, what else were we going to do that day? Plus Neon seemed imminent about the whole thing, and in his world, you have no choice. As we all stood in a line, including Wolf, although he had no uniform oddly enough, Arrell stuck his chest out in pride as he walked back and forth in front of us. He wore his uniform with pride with a badge with the symbol of a mini KingBlowHard on it to show that he was the leader of his BlowTroop. So as he puffed his chest full of air, he got serious with us, almost as if he was trying….

Arrell said as he closed his eyes in confidence and with sheer dedication, “Alright, listen up you BlowTroop maggots! I don’t know where you all came from, or what toilet they scraped you out of, BUT I AM HERE TO SET YOU STRAIGHT!?”

Jack then got a little irked with Arrell’s tone of voice.

He looked angered as he put one hoof forward and demanded, “Hey, no pony talks to me that way!”

Arrell wasn’t going to have any of it as he immediately lunged at Jack and pushed him back into the line formation as he scolded him, “YOU DON’T TALK TO YOUR SUPERIOR BLOWTROOP LEADER, YOU HEAR ME!?”

Jack, not feeling like to belittled by someone like Arrell, decided to mumble under his breath while rolling his eyes, “I’m going to get you for this one day, when you least expect it.”

Arrell then got hissy at him, “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME YOU BAGUETTE!?”

Jack rolled his eyes once again and said to get the whole ordeal over with, “Nothing you jackass.”

Arrell then closed his eyes and went back to walking back and forth in a line, “That’s better. Now, our first job to prove that we are worthy of meeting KingBlowHard himself and to be in the top tier of all of the BlowTroops, we must perform the first task of earning our first badge as a Troop. The first badge we will earn is The Scammer Badge. It is a nice badge, and a badge that we will wear with pride once we earn it together! We will gladly ALL show off the badge with a skeleton cowboy in a wheelchair off to the other BlowTroops to show that WE are BlowTroop Material! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!?”

We all said in unison in a very lousy type of tone, “Yeah…. ”

Arrell wasn’t satisfied with our response and so he bulged out a little as he put on a scowl look on his face, “WHAT WAS THAT YOU BAGUETTES!?”

So we all annoyingly said with some sarcasm in a slightly higher tone while rolling our eyes, “Yeah!”

Arrell wasn’t liking it as well as our tone as he started to flutter a bit with his wings and getting closer to our faces, “ARE YOU ROLLING YOUR EYES AT ME YOU BAGUETTES!? I WILL TAKE THOSE EYES AND REPLACE THEM WITH YOUR BALLS IF YOU DISRESPECT ME AGAIN! NOW DID I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!?”

We all then stared forward, yet with still unamused looks on our faces, as we all said, “Yes Arrell!”

Arrell was still getting on our nerves as he got very close to our faces as he lifted himself up higher just a bit from the ground, “MY DEAD GRANDMA CAN SCREAM LOUDER THAN YOU, AND HER VOCAL CORDS WERE RIPPED OUT BY A FUCKING BEAR WHILE WRESTLING ANOTHER BEAR! Allegedly….”

Despite Arrell’s attempt to intimidate us, and a tidbit of information that we didn’t know about him, Jack had enough and spoke up for the rest of us, except for Forrest who was shaking a little bit, and stood up to the leader.

Jack got even closer to Arrell’s face and demanded, “Back the fuck up or else I’m going to rip you a new one!”

Arrell then had a confident smile form on his face as he closed his eyes and nodded, “Better.”

Arrell then gently landed himself towards the ground as he kept his chest puffed out while gracefully holding his left hoof up a bit. As he landed, he looked towards us all with pride, as if we were family and he was the father and we were his children.

He said to us with respect and a sense of humility, “My Great, Great, Great, Great, Great, Not So Great, Not So Great Grandfather was not part of the BlowTroops, but if he was, I am sure he would be proud of me and all of us today; as we set out to earn our first badges. Now my fellow young BlowTroops, make him proud!”

Arrell stood on all fours, straight and tall as he closed his eyes while thinking he was a true leader or something. Instead he kind of looked like a jackass with some ego problems, but who cares.

We all just looked at him if he was that one douchebag who couldn’t shut up about his cool gaming PC and that he can do all sorts of things; but really at the end of the day, it was to compensate for his very small penis. You know, the ones that need to compensate for everything…. even their height. Sure, it seems cool, but what’s underneath is what really counts…. And it’s a disappointment. Go do a double back flip off a Chuck E. Cheese, break your legs, climb back up, and do it again.

Anyways, after Arrell was stroking his big ego and possibly his tiny dick, we all mumbled under our breath and talked about what a stuck up he was and everything.

Arrell, unaware of what we were saying about him to ourselves, opened his eyes with gratitude and raised his left arm up, “NOW, TOWARDS YOUR STATIONS EVERYPONY!”

Mac then asked with a raised left eyebrow, “What stations?”

Arrell then started to look a little nervous and said, “Uhhh…. The stations I gave you?”

He shrugged as he started to put on a small smile.

I then said to him with a straight face, “You’re not a very good leader are you?”

Arrell looked a little offended towards me, “Of course I am…. Just not as a BlowTroop Leader.”

He had to hide his fragile little ego as he puffed his chest out once more and closed his eyes and being a little snooty. I quietly rolled my eyes at him.

Arrell then rolled his eyes too as he put his right hoof to his chin, “Now let’s see uhh…. Neon and Wolf, you can bake the cookies, Knight and Forrest can go door-to-door, and Jack and Mac, you can help advertise the cookies. And I can keep track of the sales.”

He then looked to all of us with a hopeful smile that the only other one who could pull off was Forrest, “Remember, we need to make 17,647,059 in Blow Bucks in order to get the badge; 23,529,412 Blow Bucks if we want to get the Super Special Badge.”

Forrest was curious about the amount we needed to make as he raised his right hoof up and asked, “Uhhh, sorry but that sounds impossible. And what are Blow Bucks?”

Arrell then said with a giddy tone, “Why it’s the official currency of the BlowTroops of course!”

Arrell’s smile started to disappear again as he then thought about it for a bit, “And uhh…. I think I read the inflation for Blow Bucks is very high so we just need at least 7,214 bits I think.”

Arrell then smiled again, “But it goes to a good cause…. The B-TEMA Fund! I think it’s supposed to be a fancy reconstruction and renovations project for the needy that I read in the pamphlet.”

Arrell then fluttered close to us as he held his left forearm out and tried to entice us to get in a circle despite us not doing it, “Now bring it in you guys. We do this together as a team!”

We didn’t care to do a cringe team morale boost that you see in sports sometimes, but really it does nothing other than create painful memories as you cringe about the prep talk…. So we all just left and went to our jobs. Once we all left, Arrell was left alone as he was hanging loose.

However, he still took it like a champ as he raised his left arm up in cheer, “GO TEEEEAAAAMMMM! YEAH!” He was still alone and no one cared.

NEON AND WOLF….

So I guess I have to give you the details on this I suppose. I suppose you want to know and not a short version of everything…. And even if you didn’t, suck it bitch, I’m writing this journal. It’s mine…. Anyways, Neon and Wolf were in the kitchen with all of the necessary ingredients to make Neon’s famous, Crazy Cracky Cooky Cookies. And before you assume anything, it was his recipe before the explosion happened, although he did add a secret ingredient involving the bone marrow of any remains left.

So with all of the stuff in the kitchen, both were standing in the middle of the kitchen, Wolf looked up at Neon and asked like an addict recovering, “So uhh…. What are we doing here? Are we making some kind baked goods or…. What? What’s the deal here?”

Neon then perked up a bit as the pupils in his eyes shrunk the smallest they have ever been.

Neon then placed his left hoof on his mouth as he gently said to Wolf, “Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….”

Neon then slid like an NPC out of the kitchen quickly and out the kitchen door to god knows where.

Wolf didn’t get scared or anything as he simply sat in place as he said, “Oh….”

He then let a moment of silence wheeze on by before he said to himself after looking around, “Well….I think I can make the cookies.”

Then everything caught on fire, leaving Wolf not being able to make any cookies as he said to himself, “Oooohhhh….”

ME AND FORREST….

So yeah, now what happened to me and Forrest? Well, let’s see…. Uhh… right after we all ditched Arrell, I was walking and Forrest was flying with his wings near the ground as we walked into what remained of Stalia. And let me just say…. Forrest is a fat ass little bitch for using his wings instead of walking. What, couldn’t he have at least got a little exercise and lose some weight? What was he, Karen Carpenter? The big ol cow that had to eat and go mooooooo?

Well, Forrest had his exercise problems as I was trying to think for a moment what the hell we were supposed to have been doing to begin with. As we were by ourselves, I started to have an annoyed, yet eureka type look form on my face as I stared at the ground while walking.

Forrest had a smile with his fat ass as I blurted out loud, “How the hell does Arrell expect us to sell cookies door-to-door? No pony else is really alive…. technically.”

We then stopped in our tracks as I was cynical and Forrest had a nervous smile as he fluttered in the air, “I don’t know, maybe he wants us to sell some to those underground ponies from before?”

Forrest gave me a shrug as I just sighed. I then looked around only to be reminded of the explosion that Neon had caused. Some parts of buildings remained up, but most of it was a war zone with an eerie sense of a past that no longer was. Just looking out in the deserted town, it felt like a ghost or two could have been watching us; a pair of eyes watching us and we wouldn’t have known. Regardless of the feeling of loneliness and someone nearby creeping up on us, we kept our heads in the game and selling cookies door-to-door…. Despite not having any cookies to sell. I’m guessing Arrell wanted us to pre-order cookies or something but without any pre-order bonuses.

I looked to Forrest and said to him with my usual cynical look, “I don’t think they would want any cookies from us with what happened last time.”

Forrest then said with a slight worried look upon his brow, “So then how do we help Arrell and sell the cookies then?”

Forrest, being the innocent fat ass that he was, pushed me to at least give it a try at least. So I gave a sigh as I closed my eyes and put my right hoof up to my face.

I then looked back up at Forrest and said to him as he smiled at me, “Alright, let’s give it a try. It wouldn’t hurt I guess….”

So he followed me as we walked up to a random, partially destroyed house to our left.

As we walked up the partially destroyed building, the door was still intact as I said to him, “Let’s try this one I guess.”

As Forrest continued to flutter in the air, I knocked heavily four times on the wooden door. After a few seconds had passed, Forrest still had his hopeful smile, thinking that somepony would come. I on the other hand I had thought no one would come to do the door. Surprisingly…. I was wrong. A pale stallion who was transparent and pretty much just a husk of a shell, opened up the door. Nothing in particular in terms of detail to say about the ghost stallion, other than it was just a stallion with a fedora hat on.

He also looked kind of depressed too as he opened the door, “Can I help you?”

Me and Forrest wasn’t too surprised as we kept our cool and our salesmen look on…. Which was only cynicism. I did the talking while Forrest was my backup.

I tried to entice the ghost pony, “We’re selling cookies that don’t even exist yet. Give us the money for them.”

Forrest then said with an innocent plea, “Please, it’s for a good cause…. I think….”

The Ghost pony stared at us and asked with his pale eyes, “Are you two salesponies?”

I then said with a tad bit of hesitation as I pulled slightly back, “Yeeeees?”

The ghost stallion then said as he slightly opened the door to us to look inside, “Well…. You’re not first ones around here….”

The ghost stallion opened the door all the way to where we could get a peek inside. Through the doorway, we saw a mostly destroyed living room with part of the walls destroyed and part of the wallpaper rotting away. We tilted our heads as by the half destroyed couch, we saw a dead stallion body just lying there. It looked like it has been there for years, rotting away as the matter decays. It was all but a skeleton left with half an eyeball in the left socket and some bits and pieces of flesh being eaten by some starving, slightly mutated rats that lived within the walls. Most would have been shocked and horrified, but since we knew Neon, it was just another day that ended in Y and E.

We looked back to the ghost stallion and I asked with a tad bit of curiosity, “Is that supposed to be you?”

The ghost stallion then said, “Yeah…. It’s me.”

I then asked simply, “What happened to you?”

The ghost stallion said while hanging his head low, “I was a salespony.”

I then asked, “What were you selling?”

The ghost stallion then said while swinging the front door back and forth like a nervous child, “I went door-to-door selling pills to give stallions erections for four hours straight. I went inside this home to demonstrate the pill.”

I then said while being unamused by his lame story, “Oh…. So how did you die?”

The dead salesman then said to me while looking at me in the eyes, “I accidently took the second pill in case the first pill didn’t work and you can’t get it up in front of the mare.”

I then asked him, “What pill is that?”

The ghost stallion then delivered the punch line, “a cyanide pill….”

Somewhere in the background, at least in Neon’s World, you could hear a ‘womp womp’ and a slide whistle playing the in the background as Forrest and I shook our heads in embarrassments for this poor sack of shit…. And if there were others watching, I’m sure there would have been a laugh track too.

The ghost stallion said to us in a disappointing tone, “I’m sorry I can’t help you guys. But since you’re here, you’re interested in some special pills?”

I then said to him to a final blow to him while he’s still down, “No thanks, we’re not gay.”

We then turned around and walked away back to the Party Store. As we walked away, the ghost stallion continued to sob quietly to himself as he just gave himself some pity. He then took out some ghost rope and tied a noose around his neck, walked to what was part of the first floor ceiling, and tied the ghost rope around a half broken wooden beam. He then floated up a little and tried to hang himself.

And somewhere in the background again, you can hear a ‘womp womp’ and a slide whistle being played. And if you paid close enough attention, you could just hear in the far distance in Neon’s World a group of laughing dead people. On a brighter note, a ghost can kill themselves apparently. Where they go, I don’t even know; this whole portal thing only gets me so far you know….

JACK AND MAC….

So I guess I have to talk about these two don’t I? Well if I must you piece of scum eating hick shitting hilly billy mother fucker. And yes, that was all grammatically accurate. Where you might say? Me, because I’m writing it…. Bitch….

Anyways, while Wolf was dealing with the fire and me and Forrest were questioning what we were doing anymore; Jack and Mac happened to be doing the same exact thing. And for that I will patent it and sue them for it. Well for them when they walked away, they looked like as if they were busy and knew what they doing, but instead tried to play hooky from their job and went around the back of the Party Store instead.

As they went around, they went near the dirty looking alley part of the building; a place that really hasn’t changed too much even after Neon’s explosion surprisingly. It looked like as if it was still part of a world where everyone was still alive…. near a fucking dumpster.

There was a grimy brick wall layout, a barely working light above the back door that continued to flicker on and off at times. And to top it all off, what could you want more than your complimentary slightly bent tin trash cans and a big dumpster to dive into. You know, the ones that people like to go into at the back of GameStops to find half eaten, rotten food and to fend off a rabid raccoon. Yeah…. there’s a charm to those things you know, every kid should learn to go into those things and learn some new life skills. And the weakest will perish from the world and only the strong will remain; making the future genes the strongest.

The two went around the building, as they looked around to make sure Arrell wasn’t looking to see them slacking on the job. Once the coast was clear, Jack leaned against the dirty brick wall to look like a wannabe greaser and Mac cracked his neck as he gave a relaxing sigh.

Mac then blurted out loud with a slight southern twang smile of his, “Ahhhh…. Nothing like not doing your work, am I right?”

Jack just nodded his head in agreement, almost as if he wasn’t listening to him, “Yeah yeah yeah yeah, sure. So this is the plan, you go do the advertising; I’ll just be here and pretend that I’m thinking about it.”

Mac then looked a little confused as he rubbed the back of his head, “Are you sure about that? Don’t you know something that fancy smancy alphabetizing or something like that?”

Jack then looked sternly at him, “What are you, retarded? Look around us! There’s no one to advertise to or make death threats to force ponies to buy!”

Mac then turned his eyes slightly to the side and smiled gracefully as he gave himself a little chuckle as he placed his left hoof to his mouth, “Yeah…. I remember when I made threats too. Those were good times selling apples.”

Jack then strategized as he moved his left hoof around, “Look, we can’t go completely empty hoofed to Arrell. We need to have tried something.”

Mac went back to being a confused dummy as he shrugged his pony shoulders, “Well how do we do that Jack?”

Jack then placed his left hoof under his thinking chin pose as he looked around for an answer. And then…. an answer soon came as a half mutated rat came limping out of the nearby trash cans right behind Mac.

As soon as he spotted the half mutated rat, he pointed at it with his left hoof as the rat continued to limp away in grieving pain, “Go tell that thing about our cookies.”

Mac looked at the half mutated rat solemnly and his eyes lit up like a light.

Mac then straightened up his pose as he pointed to the half mutated rat with his left hoof, “WOAH NEELY, that’s a fancy looking rat if I ever seen one. It must have lots of money we can threaten him for!”

Mac then looked towards with a hint of suspicion on his face, “Wait a minute…. You’re going to make me take the fall for this job won’t you? Well I won’t fall for your tricks you slithery snake in the grass!”

Jack was unmoved by Mac’s stupidity so he simply said to him to get him off his back, “I’ll let you win at Pony Poker later tonight if you act like a clown to it for four minutes!”

Mac then yelled out in slight excitement, “Deal! I am so going to beat you tonight; you won’t know what kind of deck I’ll have!”

Jack nodded his head in agreement as Mac went off and acted like one of those sign clowns that you’d see on the street corners, advertising to a half mutated rat that didn’t even know English…. let alone anything a pony was saying. Yet the rat itself was terrified and just wanted its life to end by that point.

Suffice it to say, Mac didn’t win at Pony Poker that night…. He was too stupid to understand that Jack gave him the best hand and I won that night instead. You didn’t think Jack was an asshole enough to lie to Mac did you? Well maybe to Forrest, but still, he was a good friend just trying too hard with Mac.

ARRELL….

And so we round up everything with back to our BlowTroop Leader, Arrell, who was back inside, not having a single worry about selling the cookies. In fact, he had a smug look face on as he sat in what was Neon’s office upstairs, which used to be Mr. Sweet’s office back when he was alive.

Some say, you can still hear his voice inside the walls as he cries out, “Bitch, open this fucking wall, I’m still alive!”

It’s sad really. It’s like here’s still here with us. Anyways, in the office room that was mostly of rotten decay and crumbling wood with an unbalanced picture frame, Arrell sat at the main desk. It was a big, old desk from what seem like a hundred years ago that could tell you history of a dead body or something. There was an old, odd rolling pony chair that was half broken and made an eerie creaking noise whenever you’re sat your fat ass in it, especially if it was a pony ass in it. It was even cheaper than a Shaq chair. Arrell sat in it as he laid back as if he owned the joint as he had a careless smile across his face.

He then began to day dream a way of getting his scammer badge. He even hummed a little tune to himself that he made up on the fly as he moved his left hoof in motion to it as tried to tip his chair backwards. Soon his little bubble was busted as Wolf walked right on into the room. He had arrived unannounced and not even caring to knock as he had a little bit of black smut all over his body. At the same time however, he was unaffected by it as he looked like he was in black face.

Wolf walked right up to Arrell as he was in his chair and blurted out, “Hey uhh…. All the cookies were burned.”

Arrell immediately shot up with a shocked face as he lost his balance and fell backwards while yelling, “WHAT!?”

As he fell off his chair and tried to get himself back up, Wolf then asked without much resistance, “Can I get paid now?”

Before Arrell had time to answer, me and Forrest came walking in as I said to him with a cynical tone, “Hey Arrell, I don’t think you thought this through. No one is alive to buy the cookies.”

Arrell started to get a little worried as his legs started to shake a little, “What?”

Mac and Jack then came in just like how we did.

Jack did the talking as he looked like a scammer of some kind on his face while Mac had a stupid smile on his face, “Hey uhh, we totally advertised to ponies out there and we did the job. So can we get an award for our efforts or….”

Mac then blurted while being a little jumpy about it, “We told a rat about our cookies and I think we caught one Arrell! And that rat is going to tell his friends and those rats will to tell their friends and that’s like…. Five rats who are going to buy our cookies!”

Jack looked at him with disdain on his face as he looked him in the eyes, “You fucking idiot. Now we can’t lie anymore and have to say there was no pony to advertise to!”

Arrell was starting to get scared as he raised his left hoof to his face as he said to himself, “What?....”

A terrible horn was blown from down below, indicating the representative from The BlowTroops was here for a checkup. Once the horrible notes hit our pony ear drums, most of us cringed a little as our pony ears folded backwards. Arrell was affected most of all as he was dreading that sound in hopes that he didn’t have any bad news. We all collectively went downstairs to the front of the store like how we did before. Once we made it to the front, the representative from before in his loser glory was there, still looking funny at us.

He asked out in his scuffed like tone, “So, did you get the amount of sales you needed to earn your badge?”

Arrell was nervous as he started to rub his right arm with his left hoof. We all circled around Arrell and Jack decided to push Arrell forward like the asshole that he was as he produced a small smirk. Arrell started to become ashamed with himself as he hung his head with disappointment and trying to find the words.

Arrell said “Well you see….”

Arrell was then interrupted by Neon as he came from out of nowhere with a big bag filled with Blow Bucks. He plopped it right down in front of Arrell as he hid a surprised look on his face.

Neon just stood there afterward as he said, “We sold lots and lots of cookies!”

The representative then said, “Huh…. Well that’s more than what you needed. Well King Blow Hard will be very pleased with this. You’ve earned your badge.”

The representative then in a weird and disturbing way, reaching into his skin, took out 7 Scammer Badges for us to put on to our rag like uniforms. He just took it out of his skin and threw it on the floor.

He then took the bag and dragged it out the door as he said, “Good luck with the next badge.”

He then left without a single word and we were all a little confused. Arrell however was happy and was suddenly filled with hope and wonder once again.

Arrell, a little taken back while putting on a smile, asked Neon, “How on earth did you get all of that money Neon?”

Neon then wrapped his left hoof around Arrell’s neck and got very close to Arrell’s face as they touched foreheads and noses.

Neon then said while smiling and saying in a very deep, disturbing voice, “I am the psyop of psyops…. Don’t ask.”

Neon then let go and we all stayed silent. Arrell was a little disturbed by it as he had a worried look, but then soon turned humorous as he laughed it all off. Arrell chuckled away while Neon started to laugh too. We didn’t laugh as we were in metaphorical pain with all of this, but Neon looked towards us as if he was going to rip us a new one if we didn’t laugh.

So me, Forrest, Jack, and Mac started to fake laugh too. Wolf however was excused from laughing, that bastard….

And so, ended another day of…. Neon’s World…. Another time I guess…. another day….

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 8A: Big Neon Walking:
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 8A: Big Neon Walking:

Episode 8A: Big Neon Walking:

Ahhhhh…. Ahhhhhh…. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa….. sorry, but I am writing everything down that I am currently saying to myself right now. My jaw is hurting, my back is aching, my eye lids are heavy, and my mind is wanting to shut down right now for a few hours if you know what I mean.

And I guess…. that’s why I’m writing down my next entry here for whoever reads this. A lot happened recently and I guess I should get a start on it…. So no funny jokes from me today. You’ll have to get it somewhere else. Yes, I know, you’re disappointed. You were hoping I would write down words for almost a thousand words and then finally getting to the real meat of the story that I have to tell…. And you’d be right about saying it, but also not so much. Why? Because baby, this is part of the story that you’re reading.

I’m part of the experience, so I suggest you sit your fat ass right there and continue to stuff your face with McDonalds cheese burgers. Yeah…. Keep eating you fat fuck, you know you want to. Anyways, aside from piggy going oink oink oink oink, where I should begin our next tale or should I say recent day of events? Hmmmmm, I know exactly where to brgin….

So as usual, we were all still stuck at that Party Store, still stuck at the half baked dining area; all the while still existing in Neon’s World. At times, you couldn’t tell if the sun was coming down or not since it was always constantly covered in a green, barfing inducing like color of fog.

It smelled too if you tried to lick it. However, today was a slight bit of an anomaly as you could still spot the sunset hanging over the far and nearby distance; it was almost as if Neon hadn’t actually gotten rid of everything. The sun was almost symbolic of this as a shred of a bright and yellow glow could be seen moving through the crack of the dreary world that Neon made. It was as if hope was still there; just lingering off into the far distance. And yes, the town of Stalia was still emptied like a ghost town. There was no one else to share this moment with.

Even the crazies or the idiots or the psychopaths weren’t around. It was to the point where I started to miss them, even if they were undesirable to most; I still miss those background ponies that didn’t do much on my adventures through this universe. And yet despite seeing that glowing light off into the distance, it was merely just a tease. It was as if we were in hell and our punishment was to be in a jail cell; yet at the same time we could just peer out a window to see the outside world that we could never reach. Freedom and prosperity was beyond some dark and gray, gloomy clouds with gravity weighing us down.

Beyond there, there could be a chance to live. Yet at the same time while looking at it; a sense of despair hit my mind like a ton of bricks as the thought crossed me that Neon could have also purged the entire universe (Aside from the stragglers that were just barely a living thing by this point of course). And with Neon, you never really knew…. Well, maybe I can know if can get a hold of this spell thingy. But until then, I can only imagine; and if that is the case; that’s the true horror right there. Being the only ones in the living universe and we have to spend the rest of eternity with Neon.

Imagine if you will with your minds and your eyelids, being the only living, sensible beings left in the universe, and the one keeping you alive is your captor, your torturer, your devil, your “friend”. You’re not allowed to die under his watch unless he says so, no one else to help you, all alone even in the vastness of space in the universe, no one to cry for help; all you can do is just scream into an endless void…. All the while Neon watches over you with his smile and mocks you. And there is nothing you can do about it. You wish that you could, but you can’t. You’re not strong enough. You don’t have enough bullets in the world to save you from him. He has won, and we’re just along for the ride….

Well enough about depression for one moment, maybe some other time I’ll talk more about how dreadful life here is. So, the sun was going down, it was an odd amazement to behold by this point. And while we saw the rare sight peering through the windows, we all just kept our minds at ease as we sat around at the circle booth in the corner. Everyone was there except for Neon who was off doing something in his office space upstairs, Arrell was in the bed room where we all slept at after doing something, and Wolf was still lying on the floor, being a useless, living, breathing paper weight.

Hey, paper weight is still a respectable job profession. So you can’t fault Wolf for being the lazy sack of shit that he was for this one, after all in Neon’s World the job market was a competitive one…. as there are no jobs at all. At least I don’t think there is. I don’t know…. you never know what those pesky little moths are cooking up. Maybe they are doing moth like things or maybe they are looking into opening up an office somewhere near the coastlines, so who truly knows.

Anyways, we were all just chilling and having some drinks that Neon made for us in advance. He calls it his “Super Duper Scooper Looper”. It tastes like lemon and orange, yet I don’t want to ask what is made from it. And I thought I saw a thing move in it. It’s best not to think of it.

Anyways, we were all talking. I was saying to everyone nonchalantly, “So uhhh…. How has Neon been with you guys lately? Anything unusual or….”

Mac interrupted me as he laid back a bit in his seat and said in a similar tone to mine, “Well nothing really. I feel like he could use some apples for his stuff, you know. Maybe a little bit more of my expertise or something to that nature.”

I then squinted at Mac and said with distain in my voice, “Mac…. you’re a fucking idiot.”

Mac then smirked as if he was proud of it as he looked at his left hoof, “Why thank you, I do take care good care of my intelligence sometimes.”

Our conversation was then interrupted as Arrell came speeding down the steps of the Party Store in the back and running into the seating area of the Party Store. He had a big smile across his face and was eager to tell us what news he had to share. He was giddy as he could be just like Forrest sometimes and even pranced around a bit.

He yelled out as he was coming down towards us, “GUYS! GUYS! WE’VE GOT OUR NEXT BADGE TO EARN!”

He came running in while still wearing his Blow Troop Uniform as he held up a pamphlet about the next task that he had to do that was sent to him. We all just stared at him, slightly annoyed about his enthusiasm still for the Blow Troops.

I gave out a big sigh as I rolled my eyes as I laid my head down on the table, “Jeez, you’re still on this stupid troop thing Arrell?”

Jack then blurted out loud in my favor as he tried to look cool while doing by leaning slightly backwards, “Yeah, can you give it a rest already? What is the “Tard Troops” going to do for us even?”

Arrell just brushed him off as he waved his left hoof at him, “Oh please Jack, you’re just a big ol’ meanie downer. Besides, it’s fun and gives us great exercise, education, and team building skills!”

Jack rolled his eyes just like I did, “Pfft, skills smills, who needs to learn to work together? It’s just us and we’ve been doing fine.”

Arrell just shook his head as he gave a little smile towards him, “Oh Classy Jack, you poor little thing.”

Jack then snapped back at Arrell as he put his right hoof on the table while pointing at him with his left, “Don’t you ever call me poor or little again you sack of good for nothing crap.”

Arrell then chuckled a bit and said to him, “Whatever.”

He then moved on with the next objective for his Troops, “So we have our next badge to earn you guys. It’s called the Poaching Badge.”

Arrell then used his left wing, sort of articulate and clever like that I didn’t think a pegasus could do, and held out the pamphlet and buried his eyes into it.

From there, he enthusiastically went into slight detail about the badge, “In it, it says we are supposed to seek the most endangered species and preferably the last of its kind that we can find…. And kill it!”

Arrell pulled the pamphlet down and smiled to us at that last part, almost all of those years of doing experiments on animals got the best of him and didn’t disturb him in the slightest. We however were unamused like usual as we just stared blankly at him. However Arrell didn’t care and simply carried on.

Arrell pulled the pamphlet back to his face as he continued to read it like a wide eyed, whimsical child at Christmas that also got ALS at the same time, “So exciting. And once we kill it, we are supposed to skin it, preferably alive and desecrate its corpse. The remains will then be shown to one of the representatives and then thrown in the garbage. Then we’ll get our badge!”

Arrell threw his left hoof into the air to express how giddy he was about the whole ordeal. We were still unamused. We didn’t even care about the killing part; we just didn’t care in the slightest about getting the stupid badge. However it meant a lot to Arrell and so we just kept our mouths shut, well most of us did. Jack only shut his because he wanted to see how long he could hold it until he wanted to take his anger and intolerance out on Forrest instead of Arrell.

Arrell continued to smile like a shmuck as he looked at the pamphlet a little more, “In here, it lists all of the potential possible, known animals that we could hunt as a Troop and kill it.”

Arrell began to squint his eyes just a tad and tapped his left hoof slightly on his chin, “Hmmmm, it seems that we only have something called Big Dick.”

Arrell pushed his head slightly back and started to become slightly worried, “It says here that no pony knows what Big Dick looks like other than it is believed that it moans really sexually loud; leaves a giant dick trail wherever it goes in its wake; stands at eight feet tall and seven inches; and it has a really BIG DICK. But reports suggest that it is just an illusion and that it just happens to have a third leg instead. Hmmmm….”

Arrell rolled his eyes as he pondered the thoughts of the cryptid in his mind.

Arrell then sprung up like a Chinese spring roll and said, “Well, there’s only one way to find out!”

Arrell then got a little curious and looked back on the pamphlet, almost as if he had missed something incredibly important, “Hmmm…. It also says here there is also The Big Gay in our area.”

Arrell then put the pamphlet down and held it with his right hoof while letting his left wing go as he became a little concerned, “Oh no you guys, The Big Gay sounds a little scary to me. It just gives me the shivers I tell you what. I don’t think I want to see The Big Gay.”

Arrell then leaned in a little forward as his eyes started to become shifty, “Who knows, The Big Gay might just be in this very room with us right now.”

Jack then responded bluntly and with a tone, “You’re gay.”

Arrell then went back to looking unamused as much as we were and looked like he was slightly offended, “Oh please Jack, you only say that because you don’t believe these animals exist.”

As I was about to blurt something out, I noticed a slight hint in the far opposite corner of the room that looked like a figure that may or may not have been gay. Even looking back, it looked like something that you would see in your sleep paralysis, but at twenty one percent opacity or something in the very back corner that you would have never noticed. Who knows, maybe it was The Big Gay and it was going to get us…. Or perhaps it’s even coming for you too. Oh no….

Anyways, after spotting something in the corner, I blurted out to Arrell, “That’s because they don’t exist.”

Arrell then started to look funny at me as I continued my ramblings and me putting my right pony elbow on the table like a mad man, “Look, I can keep an open mind and everything, but even I have to admit that in this wasteland that we call home; there is nothing out there. Well, maybe there might be some mutated animals and some underground disfigured ponies that suspiciously want to start a communist revolution I think, but that’s about it. We are all that’s pretty much left other than what Neon made for us.”

Arrell looked a little down, yet determined in his stance, “Hey, you’re talking to a pony who happens to know about animals. I’ve seen some serious shit and so when I say Big Dick exists, it exists.”

I then clapped back with annoyed eyes, “That’s because you make the serious shit against their own will.”

Neon then preassembly came from almost out of nowhere as he slid down from the stairs silently and into the room with us without a single sound. It’s like sliding into our dm’s on some fancy social media website. I will say, I never used one before, but I’d imagine it’s meant for picking up some hotties and good ol’ harassment.

Anyways, Neon came right up behind Arrell with his creepy smile like always while placing his left hoof around Arrell’s neck, “Did somebody say killing?”

Arrell was a little taken aback by Neon’s smooth moves, yet at the same time he kept his smile.

Arrell said to Neon as he kept his interest high in the subject, “Well I wouldn’t say killing. I think it’s a little bit more like scalping while it is still being fully alive and alert.”

Neon put his face a little closer to Arrell as his eyes went into a more psychotic tone than usual as he moved his eyebrows up and down, “Well that sounds like a more fun type of killing to me!”

Arrell then started to wonder in his mind about the subject, “Well, now that you mention it. It is technically killing, but not really.”

Arrell kept talking and soon at least to me and a couple of others, the two talking started to become drone out by our own misery and boredom. The look upon my face was that of a disgusted, yet just annoyed and tired type of look. I started to groan a little as Arrell and Neon went on and on about killing and scalping animals in a sadistic, yet edgy way.

I then said as the two continued to talk in their little bubble, “Ugh, god, why doesn’t Neon just kill us already? This is more painful than the way he was before. And I’m not even talking about when he used to be about killing randomly. He sounds like a psychopath that has a passion for killing, yet is so boring and uninspired about it like a college professor giving an hour long lecture.”

Jack gave me a curious look as he raised his left eyebrow at me, “Wait, you went to school?”

I then cynically looked at him as I turned my head towards him, “And you didn’t?”

Jack then said in an innocent way, “Well I kind of did, but I mostly just slacked off and did other things like Mac, although he ended up going on a southern rampage leading him to getting expelled.”

I then groaned a little more, “Of course he did. And of course you didn’t finish school either.”

Jack then waved his left hoof at me as he turned his head, “Eh, who needs it. I got by fine.”

Mac then interrupted both groups of conversation as he spouted out, “Oh please, Big dick and his fancy ween wang isn’t real at all. That’s just a myth.”

Arrell looked straight at Mac with some dead eyes and took a slight step forward, “What do you mean he’s just a myth? Of course he’s real. How else would you explain the big dick tracks that he leaves?”

Mac started to lean back like he was confident in his beliefs, “Well duh, it’s faked. It’s all nothing but faked and gayed. It’s all done by the government and the Princesses so they can then move to putting poison in the air around us to catch the invisible so called monster, while really it’s an evil plot to get us to buy Applejack’s apples and she can become a monopoly on the apple market.”

I then said to Mac in a cynical, yet dead tone of voice and look, “Mac, the princesses are long dead and Applejack’s corpse was vaporized by Neon himself. You even saw it.”

Mac then jumped forward at me and slammed his hooves on the table as he looked at me with strained eyes, “I NEED TO BELIEVE IN SOMETHING DAMN IT! LET ME HAVE THIS!”

Arrell however didn’t care if Mac was starting to break down mental wise and needed a cope; he continued to argue with him, “Well you’re wrong Mac. He IS real. And we’re going to prove it, right Knight?”

Arrell started to look at me as if he was some hot shot who was calling the shots. He shot his look over to me, expecting me to be right on his side, yet it took me by surprise as I just looked back with wide eyes and a little lost for words.

I said as I fumbled my hooves around, “Wait, what are you looking at me for!? I don’t have a stake in this.”

Arrell started to look a little desperate as he stepped a little towards me, “Oh come on Knight, you gotta believe in the Big Dick. He is real. Every instinct and “surgery” I ever did on an animal leads me to believe that he has to be real. So can you please believe me? Please?”

Arrell was almost trying to play that pity card move that Forrest always does, but unlike Forrest where he is an actual weakling, Arrell has some backbone; at least in the mental department that is.

I then gave a slight sigh and rolled me eyes in cynicism as that was all that was left for me in Neon’s World, “Well I GUESS it isn’t too farfetched that a creature like Big Dick could exist. And after Neon’s blast, almost anything could have been made as a side effect in all of this…. Death? So maybe it exists.”

Arrell then jumped up in eagerness as he pointed his left hoof towards Mac in mockery, “Ha, see Mac, I told you he is real! Now pack your things because we’re going….”

I then cut him off bluntly, “How about some other time Arrell? At least give it a day or two, it’s only a couple of days since the cookie sale badge.”

Arrell then corrected me as he looked a little disappointed, “You mean the Scammer Badge?”

I then said as I rolled my eyes again at him, “Whatever. Look, we just need sometime and maybe we can all go out and look for Big Dick…. assuming he’s real.”

Arrell then tried to plea, “But Knight, we need to....”

I then cut him off as I looked down a little bit in a grumpy manor, “Hey, as long as I am alive in this world, I’m taking lead in this group just like when everyone was alive. Well, assuming Neon allows me to that is.”

I then looked hard at Neon who then just blinked innocent at me, mocking me as if he knows who was really on top. I only stared back with tiresome eyes, yet without a care left to worry about since it’s been a broken loop ever since the explosion.

Arrell then gave a sigh like I did and let his head hang down low as he twirled his left hoof around on the ground, “Fine I guess. I was just looking forward to spending some time with my Blow Troops was all.”

Arrell started walking back towards the stairs in the back and back to our barracks. He had seemed really down about it and my harsh words towards him. After all, the world just wasn’t the same anymore. Any chance that he could work with animals; even if it was just a glimmer of hope, he was happy enough to take it and roll with it.

Yet in Neon’s World, it just didn’t work like that at times and he just needed to accept what cards he was dealt with. Granted I could have been nicer to him I’ll admit and try to search for the myth itself right then and there. Yet at the same time if anyone was going to do be doing anything, it was going to be relaxing and recovering. And so without much word, Arrell went to bed early, as we did all as well. Neon didn’t say much other than giving off a sign that he wanted to kill anything in this world he didn’t approve of making.

I even saw him in the kitchen alone, sharpening a knife very carefully, almost as if you could see it in his evil eyes that he wanted to purge this world that he didn’t consider to be pure of his own design. Yet it didn’t bother me at all by this point…. We are all fucked anyways.

So me and the other guys talked and one by one they all went to bed as we went into the night. Sometimes if the green clouds are just right, you can see the stars shining bright through the sky and you can imagine if you were near those stars…. away from Neon. Once we were tired, me and Jack turned off the lights and hit the bed upstairs. I guess I never mentioned the sleeping arrangements, did I?

While all of our homes were still intact, Neon preferred we stayed within reach of his vicinity so he could keep an eye on us. After all, it was his world. And so towards top of the remodeled Party store laid the barracks; our rooms. It was like an attic with a window to the outside world. There were 6 beds for all of us including Wolf, except for Neon as he slumbered somewhere else. The room we shared looked like something from a movie where an orphanage takes place and everyone is getting abused in some twisted way.

The beds were simple with white sheets and one pillow, yet did it really matter? We were all fucked anyways. And who knows, maybe this new Neon could have a little Neon heart and give us our old homes back. Anyways, it was where we stayed and where Neon could technically keep an eye on us. We also had a small bathroom to use up there, but if it was occupied, we were always welcomed to use the one a floor down near Neon’s quarters. It wasn’t welcoming since it always oozed blood on the walls, but beggars can’t be choosers. Mac never has a problem with it.

Anyways, we all went up and laid down. I started to dream a little bit of a better place than here. It was quite nice actually, yet can’t say I remember much from it either. It was all but a blur and all I can remember from that dream was that I was once happy again like I was a child. And yet a little part of me inside kind of died and…. well I can’t explain it further from there.

Once I woke up from that pleasant dream of mine, it was still “dark” outside, almost as if the night was only getting to its middle age and mid life crisis. I was jolted awake, almost as if a ghost of a pony was there and woke me up to tell me something spooky or some weird thing like that.

My eyes were groggy and I gave out a big loud yawn. I scanned the room to see nothing had changed and everything was still miserable. We all had bunk beds as I was paired up with Wolf. Jack was paired with Forrest with Forrest being the bottom and Jack being the top. And Mac and Arrell shared a bunk. Mac had the bottom because he thought it was the better deal and Arrell had the top because…. he had wings….

Everyone was sound asleep, especially Wolf with him snoring through the entire night like always. He didn’t have his drinks and alcohol to cope living life with, but he had his wooden sleep at the very least. I think it’s because he sleeps on his back through. He really should turn to his sides and not sleep on his back…. One of these days Wolf…. You’re mine….

Anyways, I scanned the room and all seemed well with not even the sound of a bug could be heard or the sound of the wind creaking through. And yet I played a quick game of “One of these things is not like the other.”

I won fast as I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Arrell wasn’t in his bed. And my eyes started to open just a little wider as my mind became a little sharper. I started to have that thinking look on my face when you started to ponder the questions of life at three in the morning.

My ears started to pick up fake cicada sounds from outside mixed with the silence from within the walls itself. There was an odd creepiness factor to it all, yet I couldn’t put my finger on it exactly. Arrell was just gone. I even looked towards the other end of the room, and the bathroom was free and open to use. And there wasn’t exactly fresh water or edible food down stairs in the kitchen either, so it only made it the more mysterious to me that Arrell was gone from his bed in the mid age of the night. I decided to investigate the best that I could despite my sense of my best judgment.

It was rallying against the thought of not getting out of bed and staying where it was safe: inside my own bed. At least then, I didn’t have to move or get in trouble with whatever Arrell was doing. Yet at the same time, I guess you could say he was still a good companion to have. So I hopped out of bed quietly and made sure to not awake anyone while doing so, not that it wasn’t hard to do to begin with. I got on the wooden floor and quietly stepped onto the wobbly wooden stairs down to the second level of the Party Store.

From there, I peered into the dark hallway to see nothing or hear nothing; not even from Neon’s room. I then continued to be silent like a stereotypical ninja as I made my way down stairs again to the first floor and to go through the front doors of the Party Store. As I came down and was heading towards the doors; I noticed Neon just standing there. He was in the usual hangout place of the store near the circle booth on the left. He was just staring deeply into space as if he was a robot.

You couldn’t even see the pupils in his eyes as he just stood there like a statue, not moving a single muscle at all. He still had his wicked smile of sorts on his face still, but that was all he had. Else, his eyes were completely white as he just…. stood there. He was like a robot, standing there and recharging. In fact, if you listen closely, you could hear what sounded like level of electricity surging through him. It was weird to say the least, yet at the same time I knew better and didn’t want to take the risk of waking him up and risking disturbing the monster.

Yet I couldn’t help but stand there and stare at him for a moment. The atmosphere around the room felt like something out of an atmospheric horror movie that was taking it sweet time getting to the hacking and slashing. Any story would have this be the part where I go up to Neon slowly, giving him a slight tap and asking if he’s alright. Yet this wasn’t a horror movie, only real life in this reality that I was in. I wasn’t a stupid, generic, cliché type of character that would get himself killed for the sake of the audience’s amusement. I’m more of the entertainer that tells you what happened to me in this book as I write them down as I look through a window portal with my magic and describe it to you in exquisite detail while writing very long run-on sentences because I can and you can’t do anything about it try saying this all in one breath you fuckers I dare you.

Aside from the dreary mood of Neon being under a state of slumber, I just gave myself a moment to think. While seeing Neon in that state was odd, I looked around the quiet and empty room, looking behind myself thinking I had just seen a shadow jump by me.

Yet all there was just a darkness filled hallway behind me. I looked back at Neon, still standing still like a statue. I looked out the store’s windows and trying to see if I could spot Arrell out there somewhere yet in all that dark, yet I couldn’t. It wasn’t all too dark though. In Neon’s World, the dark green, toxic filled clouds that covered the skies still reflected some light off of what used to be Celestia’s sun. You could see almost as there was some street lamps out there in some spots. It was weird, yet that was how the physics worked in Neon’s World.

As I looked out the window, I was afraid to go out; not knowing what else could be lurking out there since we only ever went out during the supposed day in Neon’s World. Yet something told me on the inside that I needed to venture out to find Arrell. And I wasn’t going to do it alone at least. I then turned around with Neon still in a state of sleep and headed back up the stairs to the attic.

Once I made it to the attic, I did the most sensible and responsible thing to be consistent with the mood of the night and atmosphere; I turned on the light to the attic as it blinded everyone and knocked really hard on the door like an asshole and kind of yelled (not loud enough to wake Neon up hopefully), “Wake up you lazy asses! Arrell is missing and we have to go find him.”

Everyone moaned and groaned as they rustled underneath their blankets. Jack was the most upset as he squinted at me while trying to cover his eyes.

He looked sour at me as he pushed himself halfway up and threw his pillow at me as hard as he could, “You go find him…. You fucking prick.”

As the pillow hit me a little rough on my face, I felt also nothing as it plopped on the dusty wooden floor.

I wasn’t in the mood to deal with them as I fired back, “What a nice comeback of you Jack. Now get up. Arrell needs us out there.”

I turned around full well knowing the others would follow. I was their Twilight of the group after all, and one way or another they were coming. And they did come as they slowly and groggily got out of bed.

Before I had walked out any further, I stopped in my tracks and turned my head slightly back as I asked my stick filled companion, “Are you coming Wolf?”

Wolf just laid there like a wannabe emo from 2006 that listened to My Chemical Romance and said in a dead tone of voice, “Nah, I think I’m good here.”

The only difference, he wasn’t cutting himself. I’m sure that joke is still funny wherever you are that you’re reading this from. I just rolled my eyes at him as I continued to walk down the stairs and back down to the first floor. The others followed behind me, but with eyes still trying to adjust to being alert once again to their waking world before them.

Once we made it down to the dining area once more, I told them in a lower tone of voice, “Becareful not to wake Neon and don’t be too loud.”

As I was rushing it a bit to get through the front entrance, the others were a bit weirded out by Neon’s motionless presence.

Jack then asked, “What the fuck is wrong with him?”

I then said back to him in a lower voice in a rushed tone, “I don’t know. Just keep moving; ask questions later.”

So we then all made it outside without disturbing the beast. Forrest made sure to close the front glass door behind him carefully as he used his wings to flutter and keep him steady. Once we made it outside, we all huddled around as a group a few feet from the Party Store. The three were giving me the stink eye and looking at me to give them the plan as their leader. I on the other hand looked around, trying to get my bearings straight. It was a moody atmosphere to say the least.

Everything looked so barren and desolate, yet it was more than just a horror movie; it was a vibe that I don’t think I could ever fully describe. Words could not explain the air around the place in Neon’s World at night. It felt like a different place at times that I didn’t quite notice. It was almost as if nothing had changed, yet all had become nothing but the distant past and what came before it. Somewhere in the background, you could hear cicadas trying to get it on with a chick but then getting rejected because it didn’t make six figures.

The air felt different compared during the day time in Neon’s World as it felt smoother, yet so fresh at the same time. Yet the smell in the air was still stained with the stench that Neon put into it when he killed pretty much everything. It was horrid to say the least, yet there was a peace in me that resided in the fact that everything didn’t seem so bad. Off into the far right of me, I spotted a street lamp that still remained up and functioning in Stalia that I hadn’t noticed before.

Did Neon put it there? Did it happen to be there by chance that it survived after all this time? Maybe…. maybe there was even more around that I just didn’t notice before. Maybe it was it just my mind playing tricks on me. Either way, it lighted the area around us and only added to the vibe of the whole place that gave me specific feels. And looking back, it touched the others as well; just not as much.

I looked back to the others and cleared my throat, “Ok. So Arrell I think has decided to go out on his own to find Big Dick.”

Jack then raised his left hoof up with specific look in his eyes, “Uh, yeah, why the fuck should we even give a shit? So what if he left to go find Gay Dick. That’s his own problem, not ours.”

I then said to him cynically, “He’s our friend, isn’t he?”

Jack looked back at me with a bit of sarcasm in his eyes, “Oh yes he is. And just like a good friend, we’ll give him his space.”

I then stared at him back, “I don’t expect any less of you Jack. Go back to bed then and let us find Arrell…. but you won’t because I know you’ll want to find him too.”

There was then a deep silence between us all as Mac and Forrest stared back and forth between us, giving us weird looks, waiting to see who would speak first.

Jack then started to look as cynical as me as I just gave a little smirk, “Oh I hate you so much. Fine! Let’s go find that son of a bitch. He owes me.”

I then said to the three with direction, “Ok, so more than likely Arrell went to go find Bick Dick. So regardless if he is real or not….”

Mac then interrupted me, “Well he ain’t real. He’s more than likely fake and gay than an apple monster with a tootsie hoof up its behind.”

I then ignored him, “Whatever Mac. So the best thing to do in these creepy situations is to split up. Forrest, you go with Jack. Me and Mac will search the opposite direction that you guys search that way we can ‘cover more ground’. And if one of us finds him, just yell out really loud, almost if you’re being bloody murdered if possible.”

Forrest then looked a little bummed out, “Aw, why do I have to go with Jack? You know he doesn’t like me very much.”

Jack only smiled back, knowing how he can mess with him and use him as a punching bag like how he usually does.

I then comforted him, “That’s ok Forrest. I know how compassionate you are and how you will be happy to be with him regardless.”

Forrest then smiled with a friendly aura, “You’re right, I will!”

Forrest was a little giddy and started to flutter in the air.

The two then walked away to the left to go find Arrell. I then stared at Mac and said to him, “Ok, we’re going right I guess. Got any questions Mac?”

Mac then stared at me and raised his left hoof up as if we were in grade school still, “Yeah…. What is right and what is left?”

FORREST AND JACK….

So with Forrest and Jack, they walked to the left, keeping to themselves mostly on their small trip together into the night. Without much saying a word to each other, Forrest was taking the lead between the two as he used his wings to fly low to the ground and be ahead of Jack. He held a smile on through even though anything could happen. As they walked, they spotted an overly large abandoned building. It looked like it would have been an apartment complex assuming Neon hadn’t exploded that day. Forrest silently pointed to go in there and Jack followed.

There was no door so they went into the nearest hole in a wall. As they entered, they were greeted with only an empty, concrete filled room what looked like what would have been the lobby. There was plenty of work that needed to be done still to do in order to finish it that never got done. Near the lobby was some equipment tools just laying around and a couple of dead pony skeletons that had not yet degraded into dust. Forrest didn’t seem too keen on staying in the building for longer than he needed to. He landed gently on the ground and was careful not to step on the bones of the deceased out of respect for them. The room in particular was dark and very hard to see with what little light there was coming from outside. They didn’t have a proper light source to go deeper into the building and needed help.

Forrest, starting to become scared as his bones shook, “Jeez Jack, this place sure is dark. You think you know a spell to shine a light on this place at least? Jack?.... Jack?”

Jack wasn’t responding. Forrest was starting to panic once no one was around him and he couldn’t see too well in the dark. The more he stared deeper into the dark abyss before him, the more he was afraid and started to have his imagination run wild with fear. Honestly, anything could have been lying in all of that deep dark before him as a fear quelled within him; itching at his very soul; telling him to run away. The darkness and unknown was even starting to speak to him, to lure him in like a hook on a fishing rod.

Forrest started to sweat a little bit as he called out, “Jack?”

Classy Jack was no where around. Did he not come in? Was he lost? Was he eaten up by a monster that hid in the dark? Or was he just trying to mess with him? Forrest didn’t really know the answer as his mind was too busy trying to take time deciding to a take a flight or fight response. Forrest knew he had to look for his friend Arrell, yet didn’t want to risk his own life in an old, abandoned building that looked creepy and that was going to eat him alive. Forrest took a big gulp as he started to back up slowly.

As he started to back up, he hit a concrete wall behind. Forrest jumped a little, not knowing what he was doing as he accidently went a little deeper into that darkness. With what little light there was, Forrest noticed a skull from the pile of corpses was missing. Forrest then started to think to himself if the ghosts of the damned have started to become alive once more and wonder what they would look like if they were hunting him.

And from what I can tell with the window portal, he was thinking of a floating skull with bulging eye balls and a floating cube beneath it that was looking for him and was going to kill him…. in some uncanny valley type of way. Whatever his thoughts and nightmares were going through his mind, Forrest was scared and shaken to the core with fear.

He started to look around, wondering what would happen next. Forrest could only imagine the screaming souls as ponies had died all that time ago. The horror that filled him only made him more scared to be there as the seconds passed on by. A skull of one the dead ponies then started creeping up behind him from his bottom left. Forrest started to feel a sense that someone or something was near him.

Forrest slowly looked down to his left out of curiosity. Forrest couldn’t quite see it one hundred percent, yet he knew he saw a figure of some sort and that was enough to make him jump and bolt straight for the exit as he screamed like a little bitch. Of course Jack was there laughing at his little prank trying to scare the shit out of Forrest. He held the dead pony skull in his left hoof and didn’t care for it much.

Once Jack had his fill of torturing poor Forrest, he said to himself, “Oh, this is too easy, but so worth getting out of bed for.”

Jack then too felt a presence of a floating pony skull to his bottom left with a cube beneath it staring back at him.

Jack however looked to his left and eyed it, “The fuck you looking at?”

The skull in question then nervously looked away, “No-nothing. Nothing at all, just minding my own business.”

KNIGHT AND MAC….

Ok, on to me now, the best part of all of this. Not because anything exciting happens…. but because it’s me…. and Mac. Mac is the number two in this one man show. Come for me, stay for Mac. Anyways, once Jack and Forrest went off in their own direction, Mac and I went the opposite way. We would have gone into some buildings, but Mac was slowing us down the entire forty minutes or so of walking around and looking for Arrell.

All we did was walk around corners of what used to be structurally sound buildings and ponies that were once alive. We did come across some more street lamps that I had never noticed before as they gave off an eerie kind of glow; illuminating the pathway for us as if we were meant to be there. Sometimes I think Neon is messing with us and testing us. I also wonder if we are just slowly losing our minds and we’re starting to forget what the world was like before Neon’s explosion. As we walked around which was basically a loop by this point; Mac just kept dribbling on and on about whatever came to his mind with no coherency.

I can’t even tell you what Mac was talking about when looking back. In that moment, my brain just drowned him out; and when looking back in the portal, my brain just turns off. We can all be mumbly sometimes, even me, but Mac is the king of it.

However when we were making a loop back to the first lamp post that I first noticed at the beginning and went under it, Mac was mumbling about, “And so I ate the peanuts and it was very salty to say the least. But the guy kept telling me it wasn’t peanuts, but boiled pecans! And I was telling the guy ‘You big city dummy wummy, pecans don’t exist! Pecans are only a psyop to make us all eat boiled peanuts in the bottom of a bomb shelter once the ponies got to war with Saddle Arabia. But he wasn’t listening to me at all so I told him to take his salty peanuts and shove it down his cancer ridden wife! And boy I got him! He was crying and yelling that his wife died due to too many salty peanuts! He then ran away to the bathroom like a bitch! I sure got the one up on him I tell you what!”

Mac was smiling and chuckling and expecting me to respond. Yet, my only reaction was leaving my mouth slightly open as I couldn’t keep a straight thought of Mac’s rambling in my mind. We stopped under the middle of the street lamp, basically being under the spotlight, as I turned around and just stared at him. I had that dangly look in my eye and I let a moment of silence past us by. Mac just stood there, smiling like he had just told a clever story and expected an applause from the audience.

After a moment of silence had past, I only responded to him like how I knew, “Do you ever listen to yourself sometimes Mac and you just want to just smother yourself because of how stupid you sound?”

Mac poised himself as curious as he said while putting his left hoof to his chin, “Well not on an healthy daily basis, but I do dabble it from time to time and….”

Mac was then caught off guard by his own attention span as he noticed behind me that I didn’t see, a half broken mirror on the ground.

He soon smiled and pointed at his with his left hoof, “Hey! Is that a broken mirror!?”

Mac then pushed me to the side as he lowered his pony neck to look down to investigate the broken mirror.

I was then confused as I just stood there, “What, it’s just a broken mirror.”

Mac then said while giving the broken mirror a stern look and waving at me, “Hush Knight. This is the legendary Half Broken Mirror. You’re supposed to stare at it until you win the staring contest. And then you’re supposed to say ‘Ekkie My Dickkie’ four times backwards or else the mare form the well will get you.”

Mac kept staring at the half broken mirror as we let another moment of silence let by. It was so silent just standing there, other than hearing the humming of the street light above us, you could hear me blink. And you never hear me blink my fucking eyes.

After Mac stood there like half a tard just staring at the half broken mirror, I only said to him, “Mac, it’s a fucking mirror. You won’t win the staring contest.”

Mac only waved at me again, “Knight, Hush! I’m beating my reflection.”

Mac continued to stare at it silently. It was so silent; you could hear a deformed rat fart off in the distance. I turned my head, wondering where a deformed rat farting was even coming from, but who knows honestly.

Eventually I think Mac started to realize his own stupidity and as he raised his head blinked four times fast as he looked a little curious to himself, “I think I did it wrong. I think I was supposed to say ‘Bloody Pony four times backwards and THEN do the staring contest unless I want the bitch to come out of the mirror.”

I only responded back to him in the only way I knew how, “You really should smother yourself Mac. I think you’ll learn to breathe that way.”

We were then interrupted by a low, yet spine tingling moaning off from the nearby distance. My eyes were wide as Mac only started to look around cautiously.

I then shook my head quickly as I put my right hoof to my mouth and raised my neck, “Oh right, the signal. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

After I tried my best to scream like bloody murder, Mac and I just stood there awkwardly looking at each other. I didn’t even want to make eye contact after doing that as it as a bit embarrassing.

I then broke the silence, “Was that a good enough bloody murder scream or….”

Mac answered my question humbly, “Yeah, no, ya did alright, ya did alright. I think you could have made it a little louder though so the others could hear.”

I nodded my head in agreement like a respectable adult, “Right, right.”

We then went back to being in silence. Eventually Jack and Forrest came back rushing towards us with shocked eyes as well.

Jack especially was shocked and concerned in the few times in his life as he spoke out in a bit of a rushed tone, “You heard the moaning too right?”

Forrest said, “We came over as soon as we heard it. Are you guys ok?”

I then looked deep into Forrest’s eyes and said with a concerned tone in my voice, “Yeah its ok. It’s just a damn moaning sound. It’s not like anyone is jacking themselves off to death like a freak.”

Mac then just gave me a weird look. I could only see it from my side view, but even then I could not help but my squint my eyes back at him; wondering if he had anything to say about my little comment. You can figure that one out on your own I guess. Once Mac was done awkwardly looking at me, we all then stood in horror as we heard an even louder, more closer moaning coming from somewhere nearby.

It echoed through the air as it banged against our pony ear drums. Our backs were stiff as our skin and pony coats were cold to the touch. Even Jack, as tough as he tried to make himself out to be was starting to shiver in his legs a little. We all looked around ourselves, thinking the horrid looking beast was nearby, yet we were surrounded in all of that endless dark green. It was hard to see much of anything nearby as the area oddly got darker than it usually did.

And yet, just the sound of the monster’s moaning that was totally not sexual at all was disturbing to us that it rocked our souls to it very core. As everyone else was looking around, I just happened to look behind us to then finally spot a big, blob like figure in the nearby distance. My eyes were wide like a portal to a void. It stood at least eight times taller than us. It looked like it had four legs protruding outwards from all four possible angles.

It had a long, craning like neck, almost as if it was tall on purpose to intimidate anyone that dared stood near it to gaze upon it. And while it was hard to tell looking into the dim lit area before me, I think it even was staring back at me, as if the darkness itself was looking into my soul, trying to hypnotize me to walk over to my death. It was almost like death itself was trying to tell me that life was not worth it anymore. I then without turning my head moved my right hoof and then my left hoof and tried to tap the guys right next to me without a single word.

Mac did however questioned, “What?”

However once everyone one was looking at what I saw, I knew I wasn’t just imagining things in my head. We all stood there like a frozen ice statue as we felt like we melted away at the sight; all the while the creature moaned out again. Just hearing, coming from that blob of mass before us in the darkness made us think that coming out late at night was a big mistake to begin with. Then the beast started to take steps towards us. Out legs stiffened and locked in place. We couldn’t move even if we had wanted to.

We were like a deer in headlights. Our brains knew we should move, yet our souls were too scared and curious of what death and the horrors of the unknown looked like. It was almost as if it was an instinct built in to our bodies at birth and there was nothing that we could do to change that. The beast came forward even more as we managed to back ourselves up to the point we were on the edge of the safety of the light post’s edge. The beast however did not stop and eventually came close enough towards the light to reveal it’s true self. Our minds wondered what horrors of the night in Neon’s World had in store for us for our eye sights to process. We could only imagine what the light wanted to shine on the darkness for us to finally see.

After all, if you don’t have any light, then there is only darkness. A dumb cheesy line, I know, yet I think some gay group who worships some guy below said that once to me while they tried to be very gay towards me. They were very gay. In fact, they were so gay; you wondered how they even survived this long to begin with. Anyways, the true monster of the night showed his true form to us.

As soon as it came into the light…. It….. wasn’t that bad actually, yet still disturbing as all hell to lay eyes upon.

It was like a Creeper from Minecraft, but more elongated a little horizontal wise as all of his limbs looked like a big fucking dick. There was no hair or fizz, only just a horrible sense of a rugged skin condition. It was almost sickening to look at it as if some Rule 34 artist had a fetish for that hairless cat skin. Its legs were like nubs almost, pretty much a miracle that it could even stand up right. But the most confusing part of it all was the face. The Big Dick’s face was flat, as if you just put three holes and a mouth on his face and called it a day on him. However it all looked so surreal, almost as if it shouldn’t even exist in this reality. And the worst part of it all, it was scared. It looked like it was in pain and it was suffering.

It looked at us as it breathed heavily, looking for answers and a way out of this world. It then spoke words to us in a deep, tormented voice, “WHHHHHHY!? WHAT IS THIS PLACE!? WHAT AM I!? WHAT IS THIS!? WHY DO I EXIST!? WHHHHHHHHHHHY!? WHAT IS EVEN EXISTENCE!?”

It didn’t seem like it could string coherent sentences along, it only seemed more primitive in its language and that its knowledge could only go so far. And knowing that, we could only make the conclusion, I think, that it was clearly made from Neon’s explosion. Our bodies relaxed a little more as we all looked at each other, confused on what to do next.

I certainly didn’t know what to do since no one expected this outcome to Big Dick. We all thought Big Dick was going to be some chad, yet turned out to be some kind of half retarded chud as it looked at us as if we had the answers. Part of me wanted to help it, yet at the same time it felt like it would have been a waste.

And I was right too because as soon as Big Dick finally showed up, Arrell and Neon showed up almost as if they were waiting for this moment to arrive. Neon and Arrell then jumped off from I guess one of the nearby buildings that still stood tall enough and was able to trap it in a really big, yet complicated looking net. As soon as Neon fell down and landed and Arrell slowly fluttered downward, Big Dick flopped to the ground hard as it struggled to break free. It screamed in pain as it tried to wiggle its way out, yet having a difficult time doing so.

However, we were just surprised that Arrell was happily working with Neon since he had a big grin on his face.

Arrell and Neon then came up to us as Arrell said happily, “The plan worked! Nice work you guys! And great idea using the net too Neon!”

Neon then exclaimed happily as he cracked his neck upward more disturbing than normal, “Don’t mention it! I used it to catch the stragglers in the beginning.”

He said that last part in a very deep and demonic voice too by the way.

Anyways, we were all a bit confused as I stepped up and asked Arrell with a slight pissed off look, “Are you telling me you purposely went missing and knew we would try to find you…. all so you can find and capture Big Dick?”

Arrell then without a problem nodded his head, “Yup. It was the only way to motivate you guys and getting the badge. And Neon was SUPER interested in it too after you guys went to bed. But I’m flattered that you guys were worried about me. But for the record, even if I was in trouble, I could have handled myself no problem.”

His egotism started to show clearly as he admired his left hoof. The other three guys walked up and stood behind me as I silently shook my head in disappointment to all of this.

Arrell then started to act giddy as he pranced in place a bit, “Besides, we finally can call the representative and finally get the Poaching badge and earn our next rank in the Blow Troops!”

We all then heard some loud thumping as it echoed off into the distance and into nothingness. We all had confused and curious looks; so we looked to our left and found that Big Dick had escaped his entrapment. Big Dick was still out there…. roaming the lands of Neon’s world.

Arrell looked sad and disappointed as me and the others just looked out into the distance; wondering if we would ever meet the poor creature ever again. Neon just stood there staring at Big Dick’s tracks; mostly thinking how it got away…. again…. but one day he will have what is his….

So Neon then turned around to Arrell and said enthusiastically, “Well don’t worry Arrell, I can just make a fake replica of Big Dick out of the fresh dead meat from the stragglers. They won’t know the difference.”

Arrell only responded with, “Hooray! The day is saved!?”

Arrell then followed Neon as he raised his left hoof in the air. The four of us just looked at each other and just shrugged it off. We then all followed the two of them back to the Party Store.

However, there is one thing that horrifies me still…. that somewhere out there…. THE BIG GAY STILL WALKS AMONG US!!!!....

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 8B: The Neon Effect
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 8B: The Neon Effect

Episode 8B: The Neon Effect

Ahhhh…. What a nice nap. I just woke up by the way so don’t talk to me without my coffee. Or…. You know don’t yell at the pages and stuff till I have my coffee dude. And to that one skeleton in a wheelchair that doesn’t like me talking like that, well fuck you too, I need my coffee, so cry more bitch. But you know what the sad thing is…. there is no coffee in Neon’s World…. only Neon’s Green Energy Drink Splooge.

It uhhh…. tastes ok but not really. But it does give you the pep that you need to move throughout the day. I surprisingly recommend it too as it lasts for six hours long…. So take that you fucking five hour energy scum bags.

But I wouldn’t recommend one serving as anymore than two will probably give you the shakes, three will give you a bad case of the Big Gay, and four will probably be the end of you. But you know what’s even more sad? I don’t even drink coffee. I don’t even know why I brought that up. You can tell that it’s very boring here in Neon’s World.

It’s like this most of the time as we all just mope around hoping for death to come. But you know what isn’t boring? Neon’s Splooge…. it gives you the necessary energy to accomplish your tasks that you want to do and you won’t even feel sad about it. You will only just be very disappointed that you can no longer touch yourself and feel like you have the sexual gratification about your ego anymore.

You will only have your own self reflection and the sense that you no longer matter in life anymore and that you should finally use that rope that you have that’s just sitting there…. taunting you…. waiting for you to finally do it…. Do it…. Do it…. Do it.

Anyways, a thing happened the other day and I guess I’m going to write about it now.

So where should I begin? Oh yeah…. So it was just like any other day, roughly about the wee morning hours of any typical day in Neon’s World. And while life outside was not busy; we sure were inside the Party Store. We were hustling and bustling, trying to take direct orders from Arrell. I was moving heavy boxes with my magic as Jack was standing on a ladder, annoyed, trying to hang some streamers.

Mac was trying to make some kind of apples that remained in the world into something disgusting like how he usually does, and Neon was busy baking an Extra Filled Blood Type O Cake. Arrell was flying around, keeping an eye on us and trying to supervise us while Forrest was in the corner trying to get the party favors in order for any potential guest that may come over.

Forrest was in particular smiling and humming to himself in his own little world, minding his own business as the rest of us were yelling at each other and arguing over one another. Arrell didn’t have the most happiest of looks either as he was becoming more increasingly frustrated with everything and everyone as we continued to fumble our way through his orders.

He continued to bark at us as if we had any idea what he wanted us to do in the first place. Sure, it sounded simple, but was it really when he wanted me to open a specific box that was not labeled; or how he wanted Jack to hang a streamer in a very certain way as if it mattered to begin with. Hell, he was starting to become picky about where the balloons were placed at. It’s just fucking balloons, get over it; yet he wanted it to be perfect, as if the moment was going to be framed forever on an eternal wall somewhere for all to see. So while we were all getting our asses chewed out by Arrell, Forrest was (purposely) left alone in the corner.

He remained in his own little world as he smiled away. He didn’t bare any mind to us or the yelling as he was used to that in his own home. Instead, he was sitting down in the corner like a toddler, his wings folded in, and him taking his sweet time with the party favors. He seemed happy and content with his job as he hummed a little tune to himself that only he could hear.

To him, he thought he was doing a very important job as he had thought to himself that every bag given to every guest should be perfect and done with love and care. He wanted everyone to be satisfied and content with their offerings and that everyone was special no matter what. You could say he was trying to be the one who wasn’t the rest of us…. And you’d be right.

But no matter, he was our little punching bag so after Arrell yelled at Jack at the fiftieth time, he pushed back his pony ears and growled a bit, “Why the fuck are you even yelling at me for!? I’m doing all the work here!”

I then responded back in a cynical tone as I continued to stack boxes in a corner somewhere to move them out of the way, “No you’re not you jerk dick”

Jack snapped at me as he hanged from the ladder, “Shut up!”

Arrell only continued to give him a scowling look back as he crossed his arms as he raised his eyebrow at him.

Jack only got more flustered by the second, “Don’t give me that look you bunny loving son of a bitch.”

Arrell spoke up against a ruder by the minute Jack, “Look, all I am asking is to make this perfect. I’m trying to get us all the Simp Badge here you guys! We need to throw a party for King BlowHard.”

Neon was keeping his ears out nice and wide like always as he slowly pulled out a knife behind the kitchen counter window, “He’s coming you saaaaaaaaaaay?”

Arrell, who wasn’t catching on to any of Neon’s signals just like a chick, “Nah, he isn’t.”

Neon then quickly put the knife down as he continued to leave his sinister smile on like always these days.

Arrell tried to continue his little prep talk to us, “We have to throw a party as IF King BlowHard himself was coming. A representative will swing by later this afternoon to inspect us and if it’s deemed acceptable, we can receive the Simping Badge! And who knows, maybe he’ll even bring King BlowHard himself to surprise inspect us and I get to finally meet him!”

Arrell was starting to become giddy like a school girl as he smiled at that last part. Neon then once grabbed the knife from behind the kitchen counter window without a word too.

Jack however was not convinced as he continued to hang from the ladder with his left hoof still. He only looked like me when I was unamused and cynical. I even started to snicker at it; Jack caught on and was not pleased one bit even by me.

Jack then pointed his hoof over to Forrest, “Ok, well what about that red little shit bag over there in the corner working on party favors!? We’re all here busting our asses off and he’s off in the corner put plastic and paper in a fucking bag!”

Forrest caught on to his derogatory name as his pony ears perked upright. He seemed a little upset with the hostility towards him then.

Arrell came to his defense though as he tried to smooth things out while placing both his hooves in the air, “Woah now Jack. Forrest is playing an…. important part in the group.”

Arrell twisted his left hoof around as he tilted his head towards the ceiling, trying to think of excuses for Forrest, “You never know. Maybe the representative will bring along a few uninvited guests and we need to be prepared for ANYTHING at all. And we want to give a good impression that our BlowTroop shows the up most respect…. by giving them cheap little gifts that we found in the wreckage of the old One Bit Store down on Mane.”

Mac butted in as he placed his left hoof over his heart, “May the fancy thing in the sky bless the One Bit store.”

Arrell continued his defense case, “So you see, Forrest is…. playing his part for us. And without him…. where would we be?”

Arrell had optimism as he opened his arms outward and tried to convince us Forrest was a valuable member of the group. None of us smiled back and Jack was even more pissed off and cynical.

Jack said with a droning tone, “So we need to put cheap, Made In JaPony shit in a bag to be somewhere?”

Arrell couldn’t keep the cope together any longer and simply folded like commie tankies retreating to Reddit after losing a debate, “Yeah… uhh…. I guess not.”

Forrest however decided to be his own lawyer as he used his wings to flutter in place for all us to see in the middle of the room.

He spoke out as he reached his right hoof to us, “Come on guys, I can do other things too!”

Jack with still a cynical tone and look on his face, “Oh look, it can talk.”

Mac said with a surprising enthusiastic attitude, “Welcome back from the Corner of Shame Forrest!”

Forrest seemed a little down by those comments, but he pushed forward.

He tried to convince us, even towards Arrell, “Come on you guys, I can be part of the team too you know. You just need to give me a chance. I am the fastest one here after all!”

Forrest tried to stick his chest out as he placed his right hoof over his heart out of ego. He tried to put on a smile too, trying to sell himself to us.

Jack was disappointed though, “Yeah and you’re the weakest too out of all of us. Even Mac could beat your ass in a fight and he’s stupid sometimes.”

Mac was put off by that, “HEY! I am a OFFENSIVE and I find that statement to be smart!”

Jack snapped back like a shark and told Mac, “Shut up you backwards in evolution, back in the wood kick pony fuck!?”

Mac only smiled back and said, “Ok then there Jackie boy, just becareful on that ladder.”

Forrest protested as he tried to look at all of us in hope, “But… But, I can be part of the team too! I can do things and….”

Forrest looked over at Jack trying to hang a streamer that was caught under the ladder that Jack was trying to pull.

He smiled and figured he knew how to prove himself to the rest of us, “Here, I can help out Jack putting up the streamers!”

Forrest quickly moved over to the streamer and pulled it without really knowing anything that he was doing.

Before Jack could do anything at all, he said as Forrest was starting a chain reaction, “Hey, what the Neon Hell are you doing! This is my….”

It was too late; Forrest accidently pushed the ladder a little too much as it started to slide towards my direction downward. Jack lost his grip and fell off it, hurting himself a little. I however was paying attention and moved slightly towards my right as the ladder fell on the boxes I spent so much time stacking. Jack also had looked at me as I smiled back towards him to make him look like an idiot that I didn’t get hurt. From there, the ladder hit the side of the box that made the contents of it jump up in the ar. It was a bunch of knives, but not just any knives…. Neon’s Knives.

It then lingered in the air for a second or two and then went towards the first thing that it “saw”, Mac and Neon. It flew across the room and tried to stab Mac. Mac was obviously scared and tried to run away. While doing so, he accidently pushed the apples over the stove that also accidently turned on while raising his hooves in the air; flaring them around. This in turn caused a few of the apples to catch on fire.

Now to picture this with my words, the oven that Mac was at nearest to the kitchen window and therefore the counter top. There was enough force to where it then went out of the window and on to the floor. And from there, there were streamers and other decoration sprinkled throughout the room by this point, with some hanging down as low as to the ground.

This was all sadly got caught on fire as surprisingly the smoke alarm still worked as that went off too, making a really loud beeping. Neon just stood there in the kitchen doing nothing and smiling while Mac ran around in circles like an idiot accomplishing nothing in the process. Forrest just fluttered there in place, shocked at what he had caused. He looked at the small amount of chaos as Jack looked at him as if he was going to beat his ass, I was snickering, Mac was screaming, Neon was smiling, and Arrell shook his head in disappointment.

He knew how much effort he was going to have to put into just to get to back to where it was at. All the while, Forrest was the center of attention and started to feel the weight of shame that he had brought upon himself. The only question left that you might be asking…. what the hell are Neon’s Knives doing in boxes? Well I don’t know, but they were there before the explosion and I think this Neon just wanted to pack all the old stuff away, but just like you, the one reading this, you never really do find the time to clean stuff.

Come on, we all know you still have those boxes that you say you’re going to unpack and organize your home with, but you never do. It’s just like when you say you want to start exercising ever New Year so you buy any exercise machine but it just ends up as a new cloths rack. You only have your shame and your dignity to blame…. You make me sick….

TWENTY ONE MINUTES LATER….

So Forrest was outside for a bit, walking the abandoned, decaying streets of what remained of Stalia. He hanged his head low while being so alone in the middle of what seemed like nowhere. He was belittled by Jack earlier as he played the whole event in his mind over and over and over and over again. He was pushed and shoved, but all he could do was hang his head and cry.

Tears started to flow down his soft cheeks as he wallowed to himself, “I can’t do anything right. Not even in a world with just a few ponies in it that are my friends…. I-I can’t do anything right. I’m just a fuck up just like my dad said that I was. I…. I….”

Forrest was interrupted when he thought he was alone.

Neon almost finished his sentence as he snuck up behind him, “You’re a mistake?”

Forrest stopped in his tracks to look behind him with what he could see through his tears, “Neon?”

Neon strangely walked calmly towards him to comfort him. It was eerie almost, as if it wasn’t right and out of character for him to do such a thing.

Neon said as he tried to put on a warm smile for him, “It’s ok Forrest, there’s nothing to be sad about.”

Neon tilted his head and tried to use his left hoof to reach out to him as he gave a comforting smile. The smile too was off as I look back on it.

Forrest only wiped away his tears as he tried look away, “But there is Neon; every time when I try to do something and help my friends, I just mess everything up and make things worse.”

Neon continued his comforting tone, “Come on now Forrest, you’re not messing anything up. You’re just different is all. You just need to show the others that you try not to mess up anything. You’re still our friend after all.”

Forrest looked over at the sad, crumbling buildings of Stalia before him as it reminded of himself.

He tried to say to Neon with through his sadness, “Yeah, but even when I try, it isn’t my hardest they say. Bu-But it is my hardest. Let’s face it, I’m nothing, I shouldn’t even exist.”

Forrest hanged his head low while Neon oddly walked up to him and placed his left hoof on Forrest’s right shoulder. He was trying to comfort him and trying to make him think a certain way.

Neon said in an off tune kind of tone, “Come now Forrest, you’re our FrIeNd, you must see that by now.”

Forrest was starting to feel a little tingle in his skin, but wasn’t sure what it was. He then moved away from Neon as he continued to walk down his lonely path as he hanged his head in shame. Neon just let him go as he perked his head up with a soft, yet devious smile.

Forrest continued to ball his eyes out as he got further away from Neon slowly, “I just need to get some air. I’ll see you later.”

Neon didn’t say a word and only smiled at him as he saw him walk away.

LATER AT THE PARK….

Forrest made it to the park by himself as he sat at the only non- destroyed bench in the whole place. He laid down flat on his belly across the whole thing as he used his right hoof to play with the only ball that survived the explosion that he had found laying in a ditch nearby.

He gently rolled it across the ground, back and forth, trying to get his mind off of his mistakes. Yet not even the comfort of a soft and squishy ball could make him feel any better. He just laid there and mumbled to himself in deep despair. His mind began to wonder has he stared at the ball even more and started to remember the good things that came from such an innocent little object. He started to remember the days when he was young in the Cloud Trailer Park, when he was all alone and his dad didn’t care what happened to him.

He tried to find happiness in almost anything as he tried to play with the other young colts and fillies. He wasn’t the most popular, but he tried to fit in with the others the best he could. And even when it seemed like no one else cared about him, he still seemed happy. Thinking about that then lead him to think about us and in the days before Neon’s Explosion happened. He remembered how all happy we were even though we weren’t all THAT happy.

And in his bias of his nostalgia, he remembered the better, brighter days of his youth. Regardless if his nostalgia was true or not, he was happier nonetheless, and he only wish he could go back to it all. Then an idea struck him. His eye got wide as he raised his head. He looked around, tried to make sure no one else was around to see him. He was truly alone, even Neon was back with us trying to clean up the mess as he held up a knife and mumbling about King Blowhard like a maniac. Not even a ghost was nearby even though it would feel like that at times. Forrest then sat up and got off the bench. He then started to flutter in the air as he continued to look around; making sure no one else was catching on to what he was doing.

He started to rise higher and higher into the air as he mumbled to himself, “Ok, you can do this. Just like last time, you can do this Forrest. You did it once before, you can just…. do it again, ha ha….”

He started to become unsure of himself, wondering if he wasn’t strong enough to push himself to break the barriers that separated realties again. As he raised himself high into the sky, he looked around him to see nothing but a desolate landscape of destruction and despair. He has seen life still flicker with a gleam of hope, yet it was hiding in the dark corners, covering its ugly, deformed, mutilated face as Neon put his hoof on its neck.

All he saw was nothing but an empty void that would only continue to get worse. He looked towards the horizon and knew it in his heart that he must push himself hard enough to perform his greatest feat and create a Double Fireboom. He even started to think that a Triple Fireboom might even work if he could do it right with the right technique. Whatever the cost was, he needed to pay it so he could get a ticket out of the place. He looked below him one last time, seeing no one else, not even Neon. He then started to think about us even; and with a sad look he wanted to take us with him, but deep down, he’s a deserter…. and someone who obviously cared for us of course.

Still, he was going to ditch us and hope to leave for a better world before him. Forrest pushed his pony arms back as he stiffened up his legs. He let his wings lose and closed his eyes just for a few seconds more. He thought about quickly if he really wanted to try this, and if this would even work. He was wondering if he was just fooling himself or there might be a chance of escaping this hell. And within a second, he burst through the air with a pulse of energy as he flew through the skies.

He pushed his wings to their absolute limits as he his face felt the forced winds pushing against his own skin. He kept his mind straight as he focused on moving as fast as he could through the possible toxic filled, green clouds. As he zoomed in the air, one could hear the sounds of his wings breaking the sound barrier for miles around, even us, but we were mostly just focusing on the party. Plus we heard weird noises all the time so we just assumed it was like Big Dick or something.

Forrest then started to see tiny specks of light form before him, yet he knew he needed to push even faster as he spread across the lands as blazing speeds. So Forrest did what he had to do and pushed himself even harder to the point where he felt his wings burn like a hot knife sticking out. Soon, something inside him that made him click that not even him or I are sure of what it was; but he performed a Triple Fireboom…. patent pending of course.

On our side of things, four loud bangs could be heard as if four bombs had went off nearby as four giant rings of fire were left behind. Trails of fire was left lingering in the air like magic as some clouds and nearby dead trees that were even far away got caught on fire. As for Forrest, he disappeared as he just kept flying forward. Once he made it to the other side however, he made four more loud bangs but minus the fire booms. Forrest had kept his eyes tight shut during his short journey, yet when he opened them back up, he was greeted to what felt like heaven to him

. The sky was no longer filled with a gas like color or a sense of dread, but instead open, blue skies and puffy white clouds that look like you could sleep on them. As Forrest slowed down to a stop, he noticed he was out in an open green field; soon recognizing it as the outskirts of Stalia connecting to the Everfree Forest. He was pretty much at the farthest point though so no one else was around to see him arrive. Forrest was a bit confused at first, but then looked before out towards the horizon as the bright and beautiful sun touched the lands gracefully.

He was back home again. Forrest figured he had time traveled back in time. He wasn’t sure for how long ago it was, but everything looked like it was alive once more. The birds were chirping, the flowers bloomed with pretty colors, the sun was warm and welcoming friend, and all felt right with the world.

Forrest couldn’t help but have a genuine, bitter sweet smile form on his face. He wanted to cry tears of joy, yet all he could muster was joy in his heart and a mind that was free from the torment of the future. He took in a long whiff of the fresh air and was calm once more.

Then a frightful thought came to mind as he blurted out loud to himself, “Oh Shit! Where am I at!?”

Forrest started to panic a little as he placed both his hooves towards his head as he fluttered around in circles. He tried to think quickly where he may have been, not wanting to bump into his past self. Forrest then calmed down once more as a thought hit him. He then flew to the skies and into the clouds back to his home.

LATER IN THE SKY….

Once Forrest made back to the city where the pegasi of Stalia lived at, (It sounds weird, but it’s how we all saw them….) he made way for his big home in the sky. And I guess since this is my first time mentioning Forrest’s home, it was a big place, although can’t say I have too many memories of it even when looking back, not a pegasus after all; just a unicorn.

But it was like Rainbow Dash’s place, but bigger and fancier. One would ask where Forrest got the money for it since Cloud Property Taxes and all, but hey, it’s in the past now…. literally. So Forrest made it to his big, fancy cloud home and made it for his second floor bedroom window. He made sure to be super quiet with his wings and carefully fluttered nearby.

He went to the window to be safe as he got close to the cloud wall and hugged it. He then took a deep breath, trying to remain calm to not fuck it all up and possibly destroy time itself…. even though that wouldn’t have happened…. I think….

Forrest then concentrated on his movements and slowly raised himself up just enough to poke his eyes through the window. As he made sure to not make a single sound, he was able to see his past self sick in his own bed, asleep and moaning in pain. Forrest then started to remember where he was and that he was sick around this time as he caught the dreaded Cloud Flu.

Sadly, he did not get injected with four mysterious Cloud Vaccines because he was suspicious that there was a conspiracy of a Secret Cloud Society trying to kill all of the Pegasi. Anyways…. ee was sick in bed, stuffed up and shivering as his passed self tossed and turned. As the current Forrest poked his head up and was calming down, he started to feel bad about his past self.

A feeling inside of him wanted to go in there and take care of himself, but figured quickly it was just his emotions and that it was clearly a bad idea. Still, he cared for anyone that was in pain, but decided to not touch it with a fifty foot pole. However, he knew that he was free to roam around Stalia and even see his friends once again without consequence. Forrest left his home and the skies with a good conscience and left for the lands below in Stalia.

LATER AT THE BAR….

We were all at our usual meet up spot at the bar in Stalia; the name usually slips me by now. Even the sign now is destroyed. Well, we were all there sitting at the counter and just having a drink and chilling is all. There were a couple of other ponies in it, a couple playing pool I think and just enjoying the atmosphere. The usual bartender was kicking back at the corner of the bar and reading a newspaper and being lazy like usual and we just enjoyed the moment and the vibe.

Mac was rambling on about how Celestia was secretly breeding chicken to eat all the apples in the world so everyone would then be forced to switch to lab-made apples; and that it would then give you Appleacidious, “I swear I saw what I saw. They told me this was happening and that if we don’t do anything about this, then the only ones who will be able to sell apples is Applejack and Snipper Figs….”

Mac was acting serious as his eyes were wide as if he was deadly afraid of what he had just described while slamming his hooves flat on the counter top of the bar. There was a brief moment of silence as we all just stared at him; not shocked, just unamused.

I said to him as I just looked into his eyes, “What the hell are you talking about Mac?”

When we least suspected it, that was when Forrest came flying into the bar with a hint of speed and eagerness to meet us. He was smiling away, the happiest you’d probably ever seen him. Our past selves just stared at him, yet confused a bit.

Forrest came right up to us as he hugged us with a cheerful tone, “Oh it’s great to see you my friends!”

Forrest then got a little teary eyed and looked at Neon who was at the end of our group on the opposite side of me, “And it’s good to see you too Neon.”

Neon only cracked his neck with the appropriate sounds and all towards Forrest as he smiled wide with his teeth, “I can’t wait to see you again too Forrest! The sky is purple and the sea is green!”

Neon then went back to drinking his alcohol after saying his random takes with little to no meaning as usual. I mean sometimes he made sense, but at others he didn’t…. yet somewhere in all of that randomness lied a code of some kind I’m sure of it.

Arrell smiled a tad bit as Forrest went to hugging him along with Jack who seemed a bit uncomfortable and angered towards Forrest doing that, “Well I’m glad to see you to but…. weren’t you supposed to be sick or something?”

Forrest then let go and backed off a bit as he fluttered a bit in the air; while putting on a nervous grin, “Oh yeah…. what well uhh…. I got all better…. ha ha…. ha ha….”

Forrest was lying, yet our past selves didn’t seem to care (Now that I mention it, I think I might be having some memories of this happening all of a sudden…. Weird…), so we all just shrugged it off.

I then said as I looked a little down in the dumps as my pony ears flopped, “Well, that sounds all nice and good, but I’m required to be in the parade two weeks from now to represent the ‘Library of Stalia.’ At the very least I just need to give some ideas for the design of the float.”

I then got up from my seat and left my half finished beer on the table as I tipped my black cowboy hat towards the group as I walked out.

I was humble in my approach and tone, “Well, I’m going to go take care of it. See ya Forrest.”

Forrest however was too happy as he waved viciously goodbye to me as he saw me out, “Well goodbye Knight! I hope to see you very soon! Maybe when you’re done we can hang out…. or something!”

I walked out not responding, but Forrest didn’t mind, he was just too busy living unlike the rest of us. Once I had left, he then turned back around and went back to hugging Arrell and Jack as he closed his eyes in peaceful bliss.

He said to himself as he felt relieved once again to see us all alive and well and not in a dreadful state, “I am so happy to see you all and this town.”

Arrell was starting to get weirded out by Forrest, but Jack was annoyed to the point where he shoved Forrest off of him and punched him right in the face.

He then said to himself as he went back to his beer with a slump, “faggot….”

Forrest didn’t care though as he hit the floor hard. He still smiled as he rubbed his cheek as he got up. He didn’t say a word, only nodded in approval. Sure, Jack still did this to him back in the present time, yet just the fact that no one had the idea of what hell awaited us during the parade was a sweet relief.

LATER WITH ARRELL AND JACK….

While Jack was not happy to be with Forrest, he voluntary let him drag him around wherever he wanted Jack and Arrell to go. So after they left the bar, Forrest had brought them to the town’s mini golf course.

He stood there by the outside entrance of the place with a big smile while the two were unsure why he wanted to play mini golf with them; and such a random activity to begin with. Both Arrell and Jack raised an eyebrow out of curiosity and shrugged to themselves about it. And I guess to describe the mini golf course; it was a sort of hang out spot for the cheap and weirdoes for the town. It wasn’t bad, just a typical eighteen hole with one final special hole at the end to see who was the best of each party.

Nothing more, nothing less. It was all outside too with a small shack for the payment and golf clubs and the like with a small gate entrance to the place along with metal fencing surrounding the place. Each hole had some unique gimmick to it, making it weird and crazy and out of place and possibly illegal too. Anyways, Forrest had brought them both there, they all got their clubs and soon they were off to the first hole. The first hole was rather straight forward and simple as it was mostly a angled, straight forward shot. The par was 2 and Forrest was the first to go.

Arrell and Jack stood by on the sidelines as they leaned on their clubs. Jack was annoyed and wanted to get the game over with while Arrell was waiting with curiosity, yet patient. Forrest fluttered a bit in the air as he tried his best to hold the golf club with his hooves as he tried to line up his shot. He had a big grin on his face and was just taking in the moment to just spend time with his friends was all. All the while some kind of fun party music was playing over on the small intercom speakers littered throughout the mini golf course.

Once Forrest thought he had his first shot, he carefully dung his club a small amount of times until he took his one big swing at it. However, instead of hitting the ball, he would then instead miss it and accidently let the club swing almost a full three hundred and sixty degrees and let it come back around. It then bit him in the ass as he accidently hit his own body with the golf club; causing him to lose his balance and fall to the ground with a thump.

Jack then began to point with his left hoof and laugh at his pain while Arrell remained concerned. Forrest then got back up with no problem with a smile as he gently rubbed his tender spot with care. Arrell then had a small smile on his face as he chuckled along with Jack. Forrest wanted to laugh with them too as he thought he had just made a memory with them.

LATER ON WITH MAC AND NEON….

And so after their fun and games, Forrest went over to Mac’s place on the farm. Mac was trying to pick some apples from the trees and to just be a good friend; he lent him his hoof and picked the apples for him. Forrest was using his wings instead and placing the apples in their designated baskets.

All the while Mac got a little lazy and took the free labor for granted. However instead of jerking around with his crazy Applejack conspiracies, he would then instead ramble on about whatever none sense that he had on his mind at the time while performing certain physical actions with his body to express it. And Forrest did not say a single word about it all. He only simply listened to the ramblings of a mad man, yet had no problems with it.

He was just happy to be alive and to be ponies of his own kind once again. And as for Neon, well Neon was helping along too somewhere in the background, picking one apple at a time and then yelling at it. And yet he could feel both of their presence and felt relaxed and over joyed just to be with them as a whole. He was just happy to be with them in a time where there was peace and harmony to be experienced as the sun shined down upon them and the air was clean. To him, this was making another memory to him.

LATER ON WITH KNIGHT AND WOLF….

While I was busy trying to get ready for the parade in two weeks, Forrest had to drag me along with his plans too. So once he pulled me away from my work, he dragged both me and Wolf towards the fields near the outskirts of Stalia. There, no one else was there but us, yet it all felt alive to him one way or another. Forrest signaled to me to watch him do his tricks as I just sat on my pony ass, waiting for him to get on with it. Wolf on the other hand was amused and was excited to see his flying tricks…. and was probably just high too.

And so Forrest fluttered up into the air and preformed some simple, yet astounding tricks for us as he flew up the clouds and soared through the air like a leaf caught in the wind. Even I started to smile along with Forrest while catching on to a hint of the idea why he dragged me all the way out there. He was having fun and he just wanted to share the same feeling with the ones he liked and loved. And even for me at that time, despite me being cynical towards the guys, I felt that same feeling too a little bit in my heart. I just sat there and smiled as I ironically shook my head while Forrest flew high in the sky as he took in the moment, trying to play around and show off his moves.

Really Forrest wasn’t do anything fancy, yet I think all he wanted to do was to do something; anything that he could do with his friends. And honestly at the end of it, mission accomplished. Plus I think Wolf was being mesmerized by his loops and barrel rolls and the like as he chuckled to himself. All I could do was look down and smile a little at him too as I too knew this was a memory to have been made for memory’s sake.

LATER THAT NIGHT IN THE OTUSKIRTS….

And so after what seemed like a long day of just spending in town with what felt like meaningless tasks, Forrest ended it all with dragging us all out to what felt like the middle of nowhere and sat us all down on the steep hill. Jack was especially annoyed since he was that much of a jerk dick mother fucker towards Forrest, yet out of his heart; and maybe a chance to punch Forrest, he came out anyways. So as Forrest pushed us to our “seats” on top of a grassy hill as crickets chirped in the background.

He explained to us with an eager smile as he fluttered in the air while we all sat down instead, “Ok, just sit down and relax you guys.”

My old self asked in a tone, “Why did you drag us all out here again?”

Forrest looked at us all as he fluttered in front of us, “Well I got to thinking and this will be the only time in a long time when we’re going to be able to see the O’Riley constellation.”

Arrell asked, “What is that? I’ve never heard of it?”

Forrest then said as he opened his arms up, “I know, me too! But I got to looking at Knight’s library after I showed him my tricks and noticed a book and in there laid a very obscure page about this constellation. It only appears for one night every twenty one years. After that you can’t see it anymore. And so tonight’s the night and I figured we should all see it!”

Jack was annoyed, “You brought us all out to see some stupid stars?”

Mac butted in as he looked at Jack, “Not just any stars Jack! Stars that go twinkle and fancy star stuff like that!?”

Mac was mocking him and Jack could tell obviously. Neon added fuel to the fire by blurting out, “Twinkle Fwinkle!”

Forrest then said with excitement, “Just wait till you all see it. You’re going to love it!”

Forrest then fluttered aside and sat right next to us at the end right next to Arrell. And from there, it was noticeable, bright, and sparkling a little as it looked beautiful actually as we all said in unison and gawked at it. My mouth in particular was in awe as my eyes glittered back at the stars. It all looked nice and beautiful, like staring at a rare animal caught in the wild.

It was something that you know you would never see again in your life, yet you try to capture every moment of it in your mind as you try to soak it all in. Forrest looked back at us as he tried to see the constellation too. And in his mind, he didn’t want this little moment to end. It was a simple set up, yet it was the perfect moment for him that he wanted to last forever. It what he was missing back in his present timeline; and just being in this moment, he didn’t want to go back. He wanted to stay in the past forever and never let it go. In his mind, a symphony of stars and light played in his head as he took in every second of the night.

Under his breath of the starlight filled night, he said to himself calmly, “I love you guys (in a non gay way he meant). I’ll never take these moments for granted again. I hope days like this will never end and that our future can change for the better.”

Forrest was happy again. Suddenly, everything stopped. None of our past selves were moving and were sitting still like a rock. Forrest thought something was off as he raised his right eyebrow, thinking something might be up as the cricket chirpings went dead silent.

His pony ears folded backwards as he kept his cool and his breathing steady. Forrest lowered his head a little bit as he took a few steps forward towards us.

As he moved towards our frozen bodies closer, he reached out his right hoof slightly, “Guys?”

Soon he was interrupted by a bright surrounding light to his right. What appeared before him was something he saw before; a ball of light that floated in the air as it appeared white to him. It was about half the size of Forrest but it seemed bigger than him. Forrest started to cower in fear as his legs started to shake and his heart rate started to rise. His eyes were wide and his mind drawing a blank.

He didn’t muster the energy to say a word as the ball of light said to him in a wise tone, “So, there you are. You’re not supposed to be here.”

Forrest was too afraid to say a single word as he stood frozen like us like a deer in headlights.

The ball of light continued, “It is ok for you to speak Forrest. I am not here to hurt you.”

Forrest’s muscles started to relax a little bit as he calmed down, “Wh-What are you?”

The ball of light exclaimed like a wise being from another world, “I am many things in many universes. My kind goes by many names such as Travellars or Fates; but to keep it simple for your mind to understand. We watch over every and all universes that exist as we try to keep a preferred balance under the discretion of a master that we serve. However we are not perfect beings incase if you’re wondering if we are all knowing and seeing. We simply have jobs that we were made for and try to accomplish the said job. And lately in this universe, we have failed to produce results. Simply put, it is out of our hooves as how your kind would say it. But that does not mean we don’t attempt to keep things as tight and as clean as possible.”

Forrest was lost for words. His brain had a hard time comprehending what he was even seeing, let alone hearing.

Forrest tried his best to muster some words, “W-W-Wha-What do you mean by that?”

The ball of light stated to Forrest as if it was a demand, “You don’t belong in this time Forrest. You must return to your time. We don’t usually mind time distortions and beings being out of place as long as they don’t stay permanently or cause too much of a disturbance. However, especially in your situation, you cannot stay here. You must return to your present from which you came.”

Forrest wanted to protest this request, yet felt too weak to do so, “Bu-But I don’t want to go back. I like it here.”

The ball of light leaned in closer to him, “You have no choice. You must go back or else all might be at stake”

Forest started to tear up a bit as he tried to fight his feelings, “Bu-But I can’t go back. The world back in my time is sad and grey. Here it’s all…. bright….”

The ball of light, despite having no facial expressions, continued on as if it was eyeing him down, “It doesn’t matter Forrest. You belong in the world that you are meant to be in. And right now you belong in the world that you describe as ‘sad’ and ‘grey’. You cannot escape your own time. It is forever bound to you as much as it is bound to anything connected to the universes.”

Forrest lowered his head for a moment, started to have tears roll down his soft cheeks, “Is-is-isn’t there any other way that I can disconnect? Is there anything that I can do to st-st-st-stay?”

A moment of silence passed over the two as everyone and everything continued to remain frozen in time. Forrest would have hoped as his sobbing continued that there would be some kind of good news given to him in his hour of need.

The ball of light however said, “No one can bargain for their own time back Forrest. It is simply one of the many laws of the universes. You can only remember, but never get it back. Unless you are not bound, you can never be of what you once were ever again.”

Forrest tilted his head upward, trying to look pass his stream of bitter, depressed filled tears, “B-B-B-Bu-B-Bu-But I want to stay. I want to stay. I want to stay with them! I want to stay! I want to stay! I want to stay! Please don’t make me go back. I haven’t been happy in a long time and now that I made it back, I finally feel alive again. Being back in the present is a nightmare and there is nothing I can do to change it! Please…. please I’ll do anything to just stay in the past. I-I-I’ll even stay out of sight of the past me. I promise I won’t do anything to….”

The ball of light cut him off like a scorning parent, “No. There is nothing you can do. But do not cry Forrest, for there is forever hope no matter what. As long as the time exists, you can always change your future; but that is up to you.”

Forrest remained silent as he lowered his head again as he tried to keep himself together as the tears covered his face.

The ball of light then told him straight out, “It is time to go Forrest.”

Forrest then gently raised his head and looked at our past selves, frozen in time as we stared up at amazement in the sky. We had happy and pleasant looks on our faces and just to see that, Forrest was at least a little bit comfort inside. He was at least happy he was able to go back in time to experience better days than what would come next.

However, it was not enough to crack his dreary frown, but instead leave him in a sorrow like state. His lips started to quiver as he slowly walked over to our frozen bodies to get a closer look. He kept his head low and his pony ears flat as he wanted to have his last moment of peace. Once he got close enough, he stopped and took one last look at us together in harmony. He wasn’t sure when he would see something like this again while we were all in misery back in the present.

Forrest then said softly under his breath, “Goodbye…. past…. Goodbye…. memories.”

Forrest was trying to string the words together coherently, yet had trouble as he continued his crying, “I hope to…. see the sun shine…. again one day on us…. all. And if that day…. comes, I hope we could…. have a day like this…. Together… like friends…. just like we used to….”

He then turned towards the ball of light and walked towards his direction. The ball of light did not say another word and simply guided Forrest back to his present time, As Forrest got near him, they then disappeared and went back as our bodies remained frozen, as if this timeline did not exist at all (despite me having some memory about it…. Weird….)

BACK IN THE PRESENT….

Forrest arrived suddenly back in the present day within a flash. The ball of light wasn’t there though to say goodbye as he looked around. He was all alone again. He was surrounded by what he hated and despised once more. The dreary, green filled skies as the clouds blocked the potential sunlight. The dead filled air and the crumbled buildings of what once was surrounded him again.

Forest just wanted to cry even more. He didn’t really get to say goodbye deep down, yet there was nothing he could do. Forrest thought of trying to do his Triple Sonic Fireboom again, but thought it would have been a waste as he would just be pulled back in to begin with. There was no escape from the dread; it was his fate to be doomed in this place that Neon called his own. With no one around, and lucky enough for him with no Neon; he lowered his head, flattened out his pony ears, and sobbed all the way back to the Party Star alone and scared.

BACK AT THE PARTY STORE….

Forrest made it back in one piece as he continued to have tears of sadness flow down his cheeks. Once he made back inside without even looking up to see through the windows, Arrell was flying around the dining area with cheer and glee.

Forrest propped his head up; curious to what he was so happy about. He noticed that Arrell had a badge in his hooves while the rest of us stayed in a corner, looking bored and unamused. Neon of course smiled and stayed behind the kitchen counter watching everyone. Before Forrest could ask, Arrell saw him and immediately went up to Forrest, giving him a hasty hug.

After he let him go, he fluttered in the air with joy, “We did it Forrest! We got our Simp Badges! Isn’t that great new!?”

Forrest was a little surprised, as he had thought he had ruined everything before, “You got it? And I didn’t…. mess anything up!”

Arrell, while trying to keep a smile on as he tilted his head to the side, “Well you kind of still did, and we had a lot of clean up too while you were gone. Buuuuut, the representative came over and saw the fire and thought it was a great looking bonfire party we made! I don’t really get it; it really wasn’t a bon fire…. BUT HEY, WE PASSED! And that’s the important part! We are moving up in the ranks! Woooo!”

Arrell then went back to flying around the room buzzing around while toying with his new badge. While the rest of us were in our own minds, Forrest was in his, and he was starting to smile a bit. He looked at Arrell and started to think that there was hope left in the present. He thought to himself that the future might have a bright and sunny day again.

Well that’s about it, after that we all just crashed and continued on in our torture in the world. I’ll write anything else down if anything happens. I’m still wondering what happened to TK though. Where is he? In fact…. Where is TF even or anyone else? Where are they?

The end…. For now….

Author's Note

Next batch of episodes will feature SSN (Super Sayonic Nyonic) bum bum bum buuuummmm....

My Little Forest
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

My Little Forest

Author's Note

Huh... I didn't even put an author's note in... weird... Anyways, you might be asking why is this at the bottom and why is the old one at the bottom and not at the top?

Well to simply give a brief history lesson here, originally Alternate was just going to be meant for parodies for other MLP stories plus other parodies, and one offs / spin offs were going to be their own separate thing.

But things changed, and long story short, everything Alternate is in one place, while everything that is canon is in Mane or Regular Universal Magic.

This stuff is old and not really too representative anymore, but it's non-canon to mane so whatever. Does this mean I'm done with parodies? No, I still have a desire to do more, but the priority has gone way down and if I ever do any more, it's up in the air.

Just know that the next three things that you'll read is old and sort of outdate in terms of my style. And the last three are just a bunch of whatever, bonus stuff if you want to see it that way.

So will the next three things you're about to read will get the Re-Edit treatment? Not really. Cupcakes and Fire Factory will probably just get a quick clean up and this one in particular, MLF, might get a re-edit, don't know. But since it's the bigger one of the three, I'll consider it. But right now the priority is somewhere else.

Anyways enjoy, you can still laugh at it, and have a good day whoever you are.

My Little Forest

This is one adventure or sort of an adventure that was a little funny to me. For one thing, I never thought my friends and me would be in this type of situation. I don’t even think the Mane six even went through what I did. I mean, this was just so unexpected. So, where should I begin?

Well, it all started on a normal day, wait? What the fuck am I even saying? Nothing is normal in this town of Stalia.

I mean, an earth pony that is a god like being who breaks all laws of physics, that no one finds weird at all. Nor even notice it for that matter. Princess Molestia that comes to my room and molests Wolf and me. Dead bodies that no one gives a fuck about that are lying everywhere over town. A dragon that does crack. Celestia’s unstable mind that rather worries me about her. Slenderfetus. Randy fucking Newman with John Wayne that’s in a cave that’s in hell who doesn’t want to be awakened. Black wolf. In addition, a whole bunch of other shit that doesn’t make any much sense.

So, yea, moving on. So, Celesita, who I still fear she thinks I’m a Twilight, then again, we all ready had this discussion before, where I’m her new personal student and she treats me like Twilight and thinks I like books, which I don’t, whatever.

Therefore, Celestia wanted me to try to do a spell, even though she knows I can create my own magic very easily.

I mean, I even showed her I made my Timber wolf friend to talk that sounds like Brian from Family Guy and shit.

Well, she still wanted to see me do it, however she was busy, so she sends in the Twilight to come and examine me doing the spell.

It required Forest to spin around as fast as possible and make a tornado. Well, he did except since Forest is Forest fire, well, it’s a fire tornado.

Now that doesn’t make any sense, because you don’t see Dash making a fucking rainbow Tornado, but then again, Forest can do a sonic fireboom, which is like I said before, a sonic rainboom, but it’s with fire.

Well, he made a fire tornado, which keep in mind, killed 30 ponies lives, and no one gave a fuck about it. Well, he did it so fast, that I rather fucked up on my magic and sent Forest to back to my old universe, which was earth, as a five year old child.

Yes people, this is like My Little Dashie, except with Forest in it. Therefore, it would be called, My Little Forest. Of course, a human adopted him, so I’m going to give you his POV of the thing here.

How do I have his POV you might ask? Well, after I went to pick up Forest from Earth, I also stole his fucking diary, and that’s fucking right, his dairy.

Let us not get into that. Let us just say the person had some mental problems when he was a child.

Therefore, I just stole them from him and here it is.

I have a life that fucking sucks. I live day-by-day, being criticized by people of being a Brony. Then again, I used to live in the hood.

I mean, the business were not very great, because people kept getting shot for not paying a black guy his money or being racists to him by offering some KFC someone had and that person was feeling mighty generous and offered some.

Yea, why did I live in the hood? Well, it is because of my parents. My parents were black people and well, they treated me like shit. Moreover, I mean that by latterly. They used to try to flush me down the toilet and shit.

They also did crack and shit. In addition, these black people weren’t even my real parents.

Apparently, my real parents were white and gave me up.

They just left me on the doorstep of those black people, and only gave a note, that read, ‘you can sell this white for crack. We do not want him and we thought you black creatures would enjoy beating the shit out of him. Signed, Ted Turner.’

I still don’t know who this Ted Turner is.

From what I’ve heard, he’s a rich white guy and I tried to find him once, but he keeps sending assassin’s to kill me. Therefore, I don’t think he wants me to be his son.

In addition, apparently I have herpes, because Ted Turner fucked a hooker and the hooker sued him in court, and the child was his.

Therefore, what happened to my black family was that my black parents died. How?

They died from being black apparently. The hood doctor never explained to me what that even means, but he told me I wouldn’t understand, because I wasn’t a native to the hood. I also had three siblings, which were one sister and two brothers.

When my black family died, they gave all the inheritance to those three and left me nothing.

The sister and the brother died of a crack overdose, right after they found out their inheritance was crack. They died over 100 tons of it.

The other brother actually disappeared. I don’t know where to, but he just disappeared one day.

MEANWHILE IN OZ HOOD… in a Morgan Freeman Voice……

The brother that disappeared from the weird black family disappeared into what is known as OZ. He had a pet gun, named glock glock.

He had made a friends with a ho, a crack dealer, and a pimp. He was skipping along the yellow brick road, along with his new friends and pet gun, while singing, “We’re off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of the Hood.”

apparently, this is a fucking racist version Wizard of OZ. You can clearly tell, a white guy came up with this.

However, as the black person and his friends were singing the wonderful tune of happiness, an evil villain known as Dick Chaney was plotting his attack against the group, with his Swat team and their fancy white people helicopters.

Dick was staring into a pot of green white people shit, and had a villainous face and said, “I’ll get you yet hoodlums! And when I do, I shall make you pay double the taxes! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA,” he said with a villain laugh.

He then look towards the swat team and said, “go!! Go my pretties!! Go and capture those black people from the hood!” as he said that, the swat team at his disposal went into their helicopters to go and get those that Dick wished for.

As they were doing that, the classic non-racist OZ song played whenever the flying fucks went to attack.

Sorry, flying monkeys. I had not realized I was under white people rule and trying to be PC about everything. Well fuck you white people. I am fucking Morgan Freeman and I can do whatever the fuck I want. I’m god Bitch!

BACK TO THE STORY…………

Well, then the lawyers didn’t know what to do, so they decided to give it all to me, even though I wasn’t in my black parent’s will.

However, ever since those lawyers gave me my shit, my black parent’s ghosts were extremely pissed off by this, and went to haunt the lawyers. So, I inherited the house and had a job of something.

I never really knew what job I had. in fact, I don’t know what I do every day. I mean, I know I have a shitty paying job, but I don’t know what I do.

Well, I was a Brony and I always watched MLP on my computer. I always wanted a pony from MLP universe, or perhaps go to it, but I know that won’t happen, because if I ever do, Hasbro will sue my ass.

Latterly, it has been quite some time ever since the end of Season 4 and people going on message boards that doesn’t have a life and complaining about Alircorn Twilight and doing cocaine, which I was sadly apart of.

However, ever since after that, Hasbro had located every Brony that is out there and put security cameras in their houses and pretty much everything that they own. They even put a tracking device on them, just in case they ever find a way to go to the MLP universe, so if someone does, they can sue them for not filing out the proper paper work of using MLP.

That doesn’t even make any sense, but it somehow exits. Of course, you must wonder if the president has anything to do with this, or even allowed this.

Well, it wasn’t Obama, because this happened after 2016 and sadly, and I know I’m being a little racists here, but fuck it, sadly, it wasn’t the black guys fault.

Instead, America elected the first Retard into the White House. We thought it would be somehow a good idea and all, since his vice president was going to do all the shit, but unfortunately, he was Canadian and was disapproved by the American people, because he ate Canadian bacon and not American bacon.

Therefore, he was killed and the retard president was left in charge and does nothing but sits in his office, looking straightforward and nothing else.

Well, fortunately for me, somehow Hasbro forgot me and didn’t put a tracking device on me. Nor do they have any security cameras in my home, so I can do whatever I want with MLP, but I had a feeling at the time, that they were watching me, because every night, when I went to bed, I could see a person outside my window with night vision goggles on, that says, Hasbro on it.

Whenever I go to look outside, the person hides in the bushes and when I go near the bush, which strangely enough has George W. Bush in it as well. Well, when I go near it, I hear voice from it, and that voice always says, “There’s, nobody here. There is defiantly no Hasbro in these here bushes.”

Then Bush would say, “Yup. Defiantly not some person from Hasbro that’s spying on you to make sure you’re not doing anything MLP related, other then watching the show. And its defiantly not Former president Bush that basically ruined the country that’s doing cocaine now and has Dick Chaney in the Wizard of the Hood.”

Somehow, I believed the talking bush.

So, one day, I was walking back home from my job that doesn’t exists but somehow I get paid, I walked my usual route. It was the normal, car chase on the road, while there was a gang shoot out as I was walking, and a guy coming up to me, asking if I wanted crack, and a illegal Mexican that asks me if he could work for me for a nickel, while being mugged at the same time. Yup, that’s what was my usual routing walk from my job every day.

Well, today, none of those things happened. However, in the hood, it was national hood day, where everybody came together and joined hand -in- hand and had peace and were friends for once, while doing crack.

Therefore, everyone was at home and I was walking back home, when I came across a strange box. It had written on the side of the box, “a box filled with unborn fetus.”

For some reason though, I had a strange feeling it had an unborn fetus that was called slenderfetus and was from the MLP universe. I don’t know why I had thought that, but I did.

I quickly rushed over to the box, hoping to sell the unborn fetuses on EBay. I know it’s wrong, but times are tough in the hood, and I have to have some sort of money or income.

I rushed over to the box, I found nothing in the box that had to deal with unborn fetuses, and I was disappointed and kicked the box.

However, when I did so, I heard a cute little noise from the box.

When I took a second look inside, I had found the most amazing thing. It was an animated pony. He had a red coat, with a fire like mane color and he was a colt.

He was a small little boy that was a pony. He also looked like he belonged from MLP.

When I looked inside, it was looking down at the bottom of the box, possibly not knowing where it was at, and it then slowly looked up at me, with his big bright blue eyes.

He looked at me, as if he knew me. I slowly put my hand inside and it nuzzled my hand and hugged it, as if he thought I was his father.

He then had a little smile on his face, curled up right next to my warm hand, closed his eyes, and fell asleep.

He was so cute looking, that I slowly picked him up from the box and said these very words, “maybe you will go for a few hundred bucks on EBay. Let’s go you little fucker.”

I then started walking back home and looked down at him, to see if he was alright, because I couldn’t help but look at his cuteness. Well, I looked down and saw him shivering from the cold.

He then looked at me and almost as if, he wanted to cry. So I took my jacket and wrapped him up with it and told him, “Don’t want you die or you will be worthless on EBay now. Don’t worry little guy, I’m sure whoever buys you, it will be a sick fat basturad who will mistreat you.”

I then walk inside my house and turned on the little light that I had. I walked by a picture of my only friend in the world, Robin Williams.

I then said to the picture, “I’m back Robin. And I found something that I can sell on EBay so I can keep this house and continue to have the picture of you.”

I then walked to my computer and logged into my EBay account, and I had over a thousand bids on my previous set of unborn fetuses. The highest bid that I got was eight hundred bucks.

I was about to make another item for sale, which was the little colt that I had right next to me, until I stopped and looked down at him. He was so cute, I decided to not to sell him.

He was all wrapped up in my coat and I quickly took the coat away from him and said, “Get away from my coat you little fucker!”

then as I took my coat back he climbed into my lap and curled up and continued to sleep. I then realized that he too was my friend, along with Robin Williams.

I then gently petted him and said, “I guess I should give you a name little guy. You look like a Forest. Forest Fire. That will be your name, my son.”

I realized that if the ponies took him back, I was possibly going to be beaten up by them, because I just abducted a child. Then again, I didn’t give a fuck.

I then went to the living room, which strangely still had my brother and sister still on it. The authorities never took the dead bodies or anything. They just left them there.

I sat on the only spot on the couch and gently petted Forest and watched as how cute he was as he fell asleep. I could not help but cry. I then said to the two bodies next to me, “Look brother and sister. I have a son.”

Then my dead brother’s body came to life and said, “No one gives a fuck you white son of a bitch!”

Then he went back to being dead.

I found that normal, because that happened several times, but it was because my brother and sister casted a spell on them from the book of the dead, they can still be alive, even after death from time to time.

I then sat there on the couch, cried a little, and hold my Forest until I fell asleep. I couldn’t go and sleep in a bed because I didn’t have a bed.

After a few weeks of having Forest, it was a little hard at raising a son of my own. He was a little fucker all right. He broke the rules, and took shits on my blood stained carpet and other shit.

Therefore, I just punished him by whipping him from time to time, with a whip that I found next to a dead hooker once. It had a little blood and semen on it, but it was fine.

Forest even learned to talk, and his first word to me as I was walking by him and said hi to him was, “fuck you daddy.”

Apparently, Forest had learned to talk from a children show on the small TV I had, that he was watching the hood network was a little show called 123 Sesame Hood.

When he said those words in a cute little voice, I had a smile on my face and said, “you an asshole aren’t you son. Keep it up, and I’ll put you down in my backyard.” I said that in a happy tone just to make it clear to you.

After I had said that, Forest somehow drew a picture of a middle finger, showed it to me, spited on me, and left to play with his gun that I had brought him to play with as a toy.

I had brought him the gun from some pedophile that always asked me if any of his kids went inside my house.

I sometimes had sometime to play with my son, to which I took him to the park.

I didn’t have to be sneaky about hiding him, because no one in the hood went to the park. Nor was the path even occupied by some drug dealer. It was free for Forest and me.

I tried sometimes to teach him how to fly and by throwing him off from a tall tree. The first few times, he failed at it, broke some bones, and punished him for not flying correctly.

However, he did a few times, glided, and I was a little proud of him.

He asked me if he could have a cake or bake a cake to celebrate, since I never celebrated any of his birthdays at all, to which I said, “no you little fucker.”

However, one day, he flew. He flew to the clouds and I was so happy for him. I even cried that my son could fly and he did a few tricks in the air, came back to me, and asked me if we could now celebrate.

I had said to him, “we can’t have any cake since I don’t have an oven. But I can take you to the gun store and you can pick out one gun from the local hood gun store.”

He was so happy and was jumping up and down with pure joy in his heart. I knew guns were expansive, but I got lucky with a box of unborn fetuses that I sold on EBay and I decided to spend it on Forest.

I took him to the local hood gun store, and the black person behind the counter who looks like a tough guy and that had beat his wife to a bloody pulp and was doing crack greeted us with joy.

He also did do all of those things that I had mentioned. He was a nice person.

He had greeted us with, “hello sir, and a good day to you random Technicolor pony that can somehow talk and I don’t question about it. What can I do for you fine gentleman today? I have plenty of guns to choose from. I have one gun, two guns. I have an old gun, new guns. I have a red gun, a blue gun. I have gun for kids that just want o have fun with. I have guns that make puns. I have guns that shoot through the lungs easily. I even have guns to shoot some muns, even though it’s against the hood law to kill such a endangered creature in the good. I even have gun for buns or your bottom buns. I have plenty of guns to kill some cunts. I even have guns for duns and luns and nuns and zuns and wuns and kuns.”

I then said to him, “are you making up rhyme words to sound like Dr. Seuss?”

he then said to me, “yes I am good sir. Yes I am. So, what will it be today?”

Forest looked at the guns with curiosity and pointed out a shotgun, but I told him it was too expansive but he settled down with a merely AK-47.

I paid the person and Forest had his new gun. In the hood, Gun laws didn’t matter.

When we had gone home, Forest was so happy he had his gun and played with it in the backyard.

After a few days of Forest flying in the park, Forest finally did it. He did something he called the sonic Fireboom, which was a like a sonic Rainboom, but with fire instead of rainbows.

He had burn the clouds and when he did the sonic Fireboom, it was like a shockwave.

It had destroyed some cars and broke windows and eventually the entire population in the hood was after me for destroying their stuff, but Forest was still doing the sonic Fireboom and set them on fire instead. I was lucky that no police was around to arrest me.

After a while, I had gotten word, that a business called Hasbro wanted to destroy the hood and build a factory, were they will hide illegal Asian to build toys for them and provide some American jobs, so when the government is ever suspicious of them, they will have some American workers that do absolutely nothing at all. I thought it was a great idea, especially for the economy, but it would require for Forest and me to move.

Fortunately for me, I had helped out a cartel get some drugs into America, by saying to the cops that the drugs weren’t drugs, but were drugs drugs. They had brought it and they let the drugs go into America. The cartel was thankful for me helping them out; they gave me a lot of money, a better job to work with them, and a house that they recently killed a person in that once worked for them.

It was a house in the countryside, with no cities, nor houses within miles away. I thought I it would have been great for Forest, so he could fly whenever he wants to.

We moved in, and the dead body was there on the floor with a bloodstained carpet, and told Forest, “Look son. You have a new friend to play with now.”

Forest looked at me weirdly, but took the dead body to his room and played with it for a while, but then lit the body on fire, so it was all but of a burned corpse in his room.

The house even came with cable and I was happy, because that meant forest could even learn more words. In addition, the more words that he knows and talks to me with, the more of a chance that I can put him down outside.

With the fields, well, they were not exactly fields, but a farm. Apparently, this was a farm and I had a responsibility of farming the fields. Therefore, I forced my son to do it, and whipped him to plow the fields and do other farming shit.

One day, my son was watching MLP and I just got back from my job from the cartel, which was testing out drugs and make sure they wouldn’t harm the customers. Forest was watching the show and had noticed that I had came in.

He then looked at me, with sad eyes.

He then asked me, “Is that where I’m from? Am I from that TV show?” he even had a little sadness in his voice.

I then said to him, “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”

He then said to me, “I am from a cartoon world!”

He then cried and busted through my ceiling and I yelled at him and said, “Forest! Come back here right now and fix that roof! Or you will be in serious trouble young Stallion!”

He didn’t come back, and I was ready with the daddy no-no teaser that I used against him whenever he was bad.

I was fine without him for a while, until the third day when he was gone, I looked at a picture that my dead brother’s body had taken when he was drunk and it was picture of Forest and me.; I even had a smile in that picture.

I then cried and went outside to the forest that was in my backyard and went to look for him. I called out his name, but I didn’t get a response.

I eventually gave up and sat underneath a tree and said, “I’m sorry Forest. I am so sorry. I promise, you do not have to fix the roof Forest. I hope you went back to your MLP world, where you belong at, where you don’t have to fix roofs, then again, I have no idea what you do, since you’re not a pony from the show, nor you are that one Alicorn from the show that is a little colt like you are. I’m so sorry forest.”

I cried while saying those words, and I heard a noise in front of me.

It was Forest and he had said, he was sorry too and, “I love you dad. I forgive you for not telling me who I am.”

I then gestured for me and him to have a hug, and he had said, “Actually. I think I just want to stay out here. I mean, I found a nice pedophile that’s willing to take me in and I found a job that I can do that involves being a CEO of Hasbro.”

I then took out my teaser and he came into my hug, while being scared at me at the same time. I also discovered he had a cuiti mark, which were a fire symbol and a cloud.

I looked at him with pure joy in my heart and he said he had that for years and I never noticed it. I then told him that I was so glad to have him back and he had his cuiti mark for years, that I told him we were going to bake a cake.

We did and we were awful cooks but we were still happy with the shitty cake that we got as a result from the bad cooking skills that we had.

It was five years later, when I finally noticed my son was getting quite old. I took a look at him and I estimated that he was twenty years old and Forest agreed with that age and I quickly ran up to some guy that was driving by my home and took whatever he had.

This was just tickets and gave it to Forest as a gift for him. The tickets were for an air show and I knew how much Forest liked fast shit and flying. I told him he could sit on the cloud and watch the air show.

Then I said no to that idea, because I realized that the planes would notice him, but he could still fly and see the air show. We were quite confused on what to do.

It was the day of the air show and I was getting ready for it, while my son played with the dead body in his room, when I heard a knock on my door.

I asked who was it and it was a familiar voice.

I opened my door and Princess Celestia and Twilight was there. Along with five other ponies that I don’t know existed in the show, but looked like they were part of some group of elements.

I then offered them to come in, with a gun ready at the hand, because I didn’t want them to take my Forest away from me, but something told me to put the gun down and give love and tolerance to them. And………..

(BACK TO THE KNIGHT)

Ok ok ok… you get the fucking point. Now let’s move on. Oh and when that person meant he had felt something, which was me, telling him to follow the Brony code.

The mind-alternating trick. Always works.

Well, I’m just going to take over here now and finish up the story. Therefore, what happened was that Celestia wanted to talk to the human and see if she can get one of her citizens back, that and get the other elements group member back.

You know, since me and my other friends’ were a part of some other element s that I still don’t know what the fuck we represent and shit.

While she was about to talk, my friend Neon said, “I’m hungry. I feel like eating a dead body.” Then the person said, “well, the cartel dropped off a dead body right next to my house, you can have it if you want.”

Then Neon teleported outside and Mac then said, “maybe I can find and take something off of the dead body. I can perhaps sell something back home.”

He had said that with his southern accent as always and rushed out the door to go and confiscate the items from the dead body.

Twilight looked at me with a confused look on her face and I had told her, “don’t ask. Ok. I’m just surprised you haven’t even seen what else they do when you’re not in town.”

Then Twilight changed the subject and had a love look on her face and said, “you know Knight. After we get Forest back, you could come over to my house and we could…. Spend some time together.”

I rather wanted to punch Twilight right there. I mean, I know she has a crush on me, but I wasn’t a fucking clopper, then again, Molestia Molests me sometimes, so I guess I am, but still.

Celestia was talking to the human, and I joined the conversation, by saying to Celestia and Twilight, “listen. How about this. You two go outside, while we handle this. Besides, Forest is my friend, and I need to get him back by myself, and with my friends.”

They then agreed to, but were a little worried for me and not successfully achieving of getting Forest back. After Celestia and Twilight had left, Neon had teleported back into the room, along with Mac.

Neon had a little bit of blood on his lips, while Mac had a lot of gold and silver on him. Along with rubies, I should mention.

I then told Jack to talk to the human, while I did something. Oh, and Forest had came down from his room and was starting to cry a little bit.

I almost wanted to cry as well a little bit.

I mean, I wanted to handle this myself, because I knew of MLD and I did not want to cry myself.

Therefore, since I did not want to cry, I went around the house, grabbing something, while Jack tried to talk the human out of keeping Forest and giving him back to us.

While he was doing that, I grabbed a teaser and a nickel, destroyed the phone, and grabbed a golf club.

I then quietly went behind the human, used my levitation spell, and slowly lifted the golf club. I then did some practice swings, and after that, I broke the person’s legs.

I kept whacking his legs with the club until he was bleeding and could not walk anymore. Of course, he would be screaming, but Neon helped by covering his mouth so he couldn’t draw attention to the princesses.

I then went up to Forest who was just standing there with a shocked expression on his face, with the teaser.

I turned it on, and Forest said aloud, “No! Not Daddy’s no-no Teaser!”

I then knocked him out from the teaser and dragged his body along the floor.

On me and my friend’s way out, I gave the person a nickel and said, “Here’s a nickel for your troubles. Oh, and before I forget, I destroyed the phone, so you can’t call for help. In addition, Forest is not twenty years old, he is twenty-three. Badaboom doucebag!”

we then went outside to join the princesses, while dragging Forest’s body.

Celestia had asked, “So. Did the human take it well?”

I then said to her, “oh yea. He did. He did very well. He said his good byes and thanked us for giving him so much years of happiness and let him go very easily without putting up a fight, nor crying. He also sends the bests for us. So let’s go.”

Then Celestia said as she was powering up her magic, “what I nice human. I must admit, that I thought your friend was going to be doomed here, but I guess he had shown us that not all humans are bad.”

We then teleported back home. I just don’t know whatever happened to that human guy at all.

BACK ON EARTH………. IN A MORGAN FREEMAN VOICE…………………

The Human guy, who somehow does not have a name in this story, possibly because he’s white, was laying on his blood stained carpet in the living room of the house that was given to him by the cartel. He laid there, almost lifeless, wondering where his son went, and who was that pony that sounded like a white guy went to.

He then heard my amazing black guy narrating voice, and had a confused look on his face.

He then said aloud, while looking at the ceiling, “Morgan Freeman? Are you narrating this?”

He had said that like he was a retarded fucker, and said, “I’m not a retarded fucker, you black guy that’s a fucking asshole!”

He had interrupted my narrating, and I then said to him, “oh, all of you white people are just fucking dumbasses. You are interrupting my beautiful narrating. You’re a mother fucker that can suck my dick you son of a white uncle fucking asshole bitch. Do you know who you fucking talking to!! I am mother fucking Morgan Freeman, and I’m god, pimping out with Jesus in heaven. So fuck you!”

I then set his house on fire, and him on fire, and he screamed throughout the night, as he was on fire. While he was on fire, he was crying from the pain when he tried to walk, for his legs were broken by some pony that was an asshole, since he sounded like a white guy.

Therefore, the fire burned through the night, and far from, the house stood a hill.

On the hill, stood three Muslims that were Christians and looked upon the dim light of the fire in the distance.

One of them said, “Look. It’s god’s sign. The shining light that god had given us. Perhaps someone near the shining light has a person who has gold, so we can give it to Robin Williams’ child.”

Then three modern wise man walked towards the guy that was on fire, as they looked up at the night sky, thanking me, god, and Jesus for showing them the way.

Now the moral of the story kids, is do not piss off Morgan Freeman, or he’ll burn your house down and send three Muslims to help you.THE END mother fuckers.

Cupcakes
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Cupcakes

Cupcakes
The day was sunny as shit. The sun was out nice and bright, and everypony were up and about doing their business. The birds were chipping shit, while the animals did shit, such as making holes, raping ponies, killing each other, the usual, normal animals stuff.

Forest Fire was a pony who had a great feeling that day was going to be the best day of his life. He was a Pegasus pony, who did not do much but have a crush on Rainbow Dash.

He was flying in the sky, as the wind hit his fire color mane. He flew up to one of the clouds that was positioned over one of the edges of the Everfree Forest. He decided to land on the cloud and take a break. When he finally reached for the cloud, he landed gently as he could on it and then started to relax.

After he did so, he then started to look over the peaceful town of Stalia. Forest then had a bit of a smile on his face as he thought of how proud he was to be part of the town. He then looked behind him and noticed that he was high enough to see Ponyville, as the citizens of that village were up and about as well.

However, he noticed something different about the village. There was no Rainbow Dash to be seen or heard. He usually would see Rainbow Dash flying up and about as usual as every morning. In fact, he knew this because he would spy on her and clop the fuck out of his pony dick until he could not breathe.

He would even strangle himself while jacking off at the same time because he would have the most awesome and epic orgasm any pony could have. When Forest noticed that Rainbow Dash was not flying as fast as she could, he made up in his mind to check it out.

As he did so, he flew as fast as he could, which was about as fast as Rainbow Dash would go, but not fast enough to beat her. Forest always wanted to be with Rainbow Dash forever, for he had a crush on her, but he could never get her to notice him and he was sad about that happening to him.

He tried different things every time she was around, although he would usually fail. However, if she did notice him, he would usually make an embarrassment of himself.

One of the many things that Forest was trying to impress Rainbow Dash with is his ability to fly as fast as her. He had always thought that perhaps if he would to fly as fast as she did, he would get a hoof job from her or perhaps a kiss on the lips, or even a date out. Then he thought he could just pay a pony hooker for such a thing, but it was not the same for it was not truly Rainbow Dash. He even tried to use a blow up doll and it still would not work.

He had and he must have had the real Rainbow Dash in order to fill the hole in his heart. Once Forest Flew to Ponyville, he started to look around for his crush, Rainbow Dash.

He searched high and low but she could not be found anywhere, for she had seemed to have disappeared. However, then a thought came to his mind. As long as he could remember when he started to stalk Rainbow Dash, he knew that she had a very close friend to her named Pinkie Pie.

He even knew where she worked at, for Rainbow Dash hanged out at Sugar Cube Corner very often. He then flew up, but not at a very fast pace, he took to the skies to see where the sweet shop was at, for he was quite confused of the layout of the town for he barley spent any time at all enjoying the quiet village at all.

Once he flew at a decent height, he started to look around his surroundings, to see if he could find the bakery. He scanned the area, and he found what he was looking for without a single pony doing something ridiculous to distract him with while he was looking.

When he did find the bakery, he swooped down and landed quietly near the door. Forest then proceeded to open the door, but strangely enough, the door was locked, as if it was barricaded from the inside.

Forest was curious about this, indeed he was, for he never expected this to happen. He then thought that perhaps something he did not understand was going on, so he decided to knock.

Inside the bakery shop, deep near a secret hidden basement, poor old Pinkie Pie was gutting Rainbow Dash’s organs out for her new batch of cupcakes, while Rainbow Dash was pissing on herself. She was crying in pain and she could no longer bare the pain she was forced to endure.

She was begging for death, however, when she heard the knock that Forest gave out, she saw a sign of hope. However, poor old Pinkie Pie heard too, and all she heard was a new victim was at her door.

She then decided to say to Dash, “Be right back Dashie…I’m going to invite our friend in and we will have a really big party.”

Then she proceeded to exit the secret basement and go to check who it was at the door. She then unlocked it and quietly opened the door. When she did, she said, “Yes…may I help you,” while she had blood and guts all over her face.

Forest saw the red blood on Pinkie’s face, but he shrugged it off for it was normal to him since he lived with his friends in Stalia. Forest then said, “Have you seen Rainbow Dash around. I didn’t see her this morning doing what she usually does, because….I was not definitely spying on her, that’s for sure.”

Then Pinkie said with a small little grin on her face, “Nope, I did not see her at all. But, before you hit the road, would you like to come in for a cupcake?”

Then Forest said, “No, I’m fine you pink bitch.”

Then Forest immediately took off to go back to Stalia because he really didn’t like Pinkie that much. When he left, Pinkie had a weird and ok face on, while she said with a sad face on, “Awe…now I’m sad…now I don’t have a new friend to join us in our little party. Fuck it, I’ll just use the babies to come join us and kill them.”

Forest was well on his way back to Stalia, for he had already given up hope on finding Rainbow Dash, but he had thought perhaps she was sick, and he was turned off when she was sick so he couldn’t clop that day, which made him sad as shit.

However, a thought then crossed his mind, to which thought, “Oh no. I just realized. I had told Neon I was going to meet him at the party store in thirty minutes this morning. I better head over their fast before he starts making random shit happen.”

Then Forest flew as fast as he could, and he even flew as faster than Rainbow Dash. He then thought he knew he would be able to impress her and perhaps she could talk to him even once he finds her.

It took Forest no more than a minute or two to reach the town of Stalia on the other end of the Everfree Forest. Once he did, he headed straight for the party store.

Once he did, he opened the doors and acted normal and tried to pretend as if he was not late at all. Once he did, he noticed the sweets were nowhere to be found. However, instead, he found a very crazy, psychopathic, evil, and scary looking Neon Party standing in front of him.

However, Forest had seen this as normal and was not out of place one bit. He then said to his dear friend, “Hey Neon, you wanted to see me about something?”

Then Neon said, “Yea…sure…buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuddy. I just wanted you to test something out for me real quick before I used it on others. I would like for you to…sniff this ass.”

Then Forest saw a donkey in the room, which had his ass pointing at him. Then Forest asked, “Why do I have to sniff an ass’s asshole?”
Then Neon said, “I think you would find it will be a very charming prize inside of it. Perhaps you will even find brownies inside the asshole.”

Then Forest said with all of his might, “Brownies!”

Then Forest ran straight for the asshole of the ass and stuck his head inside it, and strangely enough found brownies within the asshole of the ass. He then began to munch on it, until he felt sleepy, to which he was knocked out.

Once he awoken back to the land of the living, Forest felt different, as if he was on a cold, metal table, and was strapped down by leathery straps as well as super-mega-glued on it.

By the way, this story is brought to you by the amazing power of super-ultra-mega –glue…get yours today or you’ll get haunted by AIDS.

Forest was still wondering what kind of contraption he was even on in the first place. Forest’s mind was going through many things in his head at a very fast rate. He was first nervous and was a bit scared, for he did not know where he was when he woke up.
Then he calmed himself down because he then thought and came to a conclusion it must have been his friends pulling a very non-funny prank on him.

However, what he could not explain that he could not see but only a dim light bulb above his head. Forest then said aloud, “Hello…is anypony here?”

Then Neon said while still in the shadows, “Oh goodie, you’re awake Forest. I almost thought I killed you, then I would have been sad if you would have died because I would then have to kidnap and drug another pony, for you would have been dead…you fucking douche!”
Then Forest asked, “Neon…where am I? Why am I strapped down and on a cold metal table in a dark room that is possibly a secret basement of yours? And why do I have a major boner right now?”

Then Neon said, “Well…you’re here because we’re going to have some little fun.”

Then Forest said, “But that doesn’t explain why I have a major boner right now.”

Then Neon said, “I drugged you with Viagra while slipping something in it to put you to sleep. You had that boner for over four hours by now, for you were asleep for four and half hours.”

Then Forest said, “I think I need to talk to a doctor. I’ve used Viagra before to when I wanted to jack off to Rainbow Dash and I’ve read that bottle. You are not supposed to have a boner for more than four hours. I think I’m dying right now.”

Then Neon said, “Don’t worry Forest, you’re going to DIE anyways, for I’m going to harvest your internal organs mother fucker!!!”

While poor old Neon was saying such a thing, Neon automatically took out a running chainsaw from out of nowhere. Once Forest saw the chainsaw, he was worrying a bit and was starting to sweat for he was worried that he was going to endure true pain and suffer.
However, he then reminded himself that it was only merely a prank that his friends were pulling on him.

Forest then said, “Ha ha ha, nice prank, and when I mean nice prank, I mean you suck at it and you can go to hell with your bad jokes. Now untie me because I feel like jacking off right now. If you untie me now, we could possibly jack off like back to back…mostly because I’m lonely when I ever jack off…I just need a friend with me and a picture of Dash doesn’t help…nor a stuffed teddy bear neither.”

Then Neon said, “This is no prank…BUT YOUR FUCKING DOOM!!!”

Then Neon put on a hockey mask and was starting to approach Forest and was about to slaughter him into bits and pieces.

However, before Neon had the chance to strike Forest, Forest then said, “Oh, there were so many things I wanted to do before I died. I mean, I’m still a fucking virgin man. A fucking virgin! I don’t want to go to heaven while I’m still a virgin! I’ll be laughed at and called a nerd, I’ll end up playing with the lame nerds with Dungeon and Dragons…, and twenty-four/seven of a weird game call World of Warcraft. I have heard myths about it, where a player would play all day and would not see sun light at all, and if he did, he would be in pain because of the sun’s rays. I don’t want to turn into one of them at all. That and I don’t want to be blown up by a Saddle Arabian pony who blows up seventy-two virgins in heaven. That and I always thought my life would be put to an end or in other words, I thought I would be killed by…by Rainbow Dash…in self-defense because I’m stalking her late at night somewhere. Then I would have a major and perfect boner as well before I died, and that would be awesome. That and I always wanted to see my good ol’ buddy Knight before I died…because…he wasn’t a douche like you…but instead…my douche.”

Then Neon stopped for a moment once he heard those words that came out of Forest’s mouth. He then realized that he too wanted to see Knight, for he would help him with the harvest during the full moon of gulatuka, so a sacrifice would be made and his demon should leave every pony else alone.

Then Neon uncovered his mask and he said, “That sounds like an excellent idea Forest! Let us invite Knight to the party. I can sure use his help trying to kill you.”

Then Forest said, “Sure, why not. Also, can you use your powers to make him a clone of Rainbow Dash, because I would like to at least have someone look like her so I can pretend it’s her killing me. I mean, I know it’s not real, but I’m lonely as you can tell.”

While this conversation was going, meanwhile, at Knight’s old cozy home is where Wolf was sleeping soundly on the couch, passed out from drinking too many beers, while Knight was reading a book at pure random while smoking some weed of his very own.

Then…Knight heard my voiceover and narration, to which Knight got a bit curious to where it was coming from. Then Knight decided to shrug it off and go back to reading while he still has that curious looks in his eyes.

Then Knight said, “Wait…what are you talking about? Who’s there and why is it not Morgan Freeman’s voice? And what do you mean reading at pure random. I don’t even like these fucking books you fucking idiot! I just read this book because I made a bet with Twilight, which I lost because Wolf here was a terrible partner. Then again, she did give me an alternative, which was to have sex with her and play sexual games with her and doing various sex positions as well. I mean, she had high hopes I was going to choose to do her, but I let her down by choosing to read a book, but it’s a sexual book, with sexual pictures of her ass everywhere in the book. Damn I hate that fucking bitch. Anyways, go fuck yourself random narrator that isn’t Morgan Freeman. At least he does cool stuff, while you’re just bland and boring.”

Then Knight went back to his porn. To which Knight said, “This isn’t porn. I’m not even enjoying it. I would rather suck on a buffalo’s dick and get rained on by shit from a donkey and having to staple my own balls to a snake’s asshole while he’s puking and cursing up a storm at the same time. Besides, the cloppers can have this book if they want it. Perhaps I just started World War Six and I don’t even know it. Anyways…go fuck yourself.”

Then Knight decided to go and help his poor old friend Neon kill another one of his friends, Forest Fire. To which Knight also said, “I’m not going to do that you fucking bitch. I would never help that bastard Neon with anything. Besides, I knew this was going to happen one day, but I didn’t think it was going to happen on Arbor day. Perhaps he wants to plant dead bodies. Now that I think of it…perhaps I should do the same. Anyways, I’m not going, simple as that, now fuck off.”

Then Knight was so happy and glee in his dear heart that he was off to see Neon, that he instantly wished he was there at that very moment, which he was there. Then Knight said as he was being forcibly teleported by me to Neon’s evil lair, “Wait…what!!!?”

Once Knight was teleported to his destination that he desired within his own heart and not by me, he fell to the floor, but with great cheer in his heart that he wanted to kill Forest.

Once Neon saw him, he hugged his friend as tight as he could and he said in a very creepy wisher, “Let’s cap this bitch and eat his ditch.”

Then Knight pulled away from Neon and he said, “Did you just rhymed. Why are you rhyming…wait a second here. Is this the dead ghost of Dr. Seuss. Look, I know I might have pissed and danced on your grave back on Earth, but you’ve got to understand, I really hated the book the Places You’ll go, because that’s just bullshit. I mean, that book is bullshit. That would never happen in real life to a kid…ok? Are we cool mister Seuss’s dead ghost that is haunting me?”

Then I replied back in my disembodied voice, “Oh come on now dear Knight, we will never be cool for you pissed on my grave with great strength, and I believe now that you should pay the price with your mice, who I killed and ate their beating hearts on a silver platter made by a flatter.”

Then Knight said with a growl in his voice, “Listen, I’m not in the fucking mood right now, can we just end this!? I’ll do anything else that you want.”

Then I said to him with a very surprised voice in mind with a quick little line, “Oh…do you know? Well then, if I let your friend’s go and out of my control, I want you to meet Thing one and Thing two, for I would like for you to kill them for they owe me money. So…do we have a deal on seal?”

Knight then said to me, “Yeah, sure, I’m fine with killing. I’ll teach those assholes not to mess with you.”

Then I said, “Oh goodie, now I have a thing less on my black list. Oh thank you ever so kindly, and now you have control of your friends back and you can be on your merely way back to your nice cozy little home with your porn.”

Then he said back to me, “It’s not porn damn it. How many times do I have to say it?”

Then I said, “Whatever you say you fucking sleeze of a heeze. Tat ta for now you little shit, and may your hearts be with the larts.”

Then Knight said, “Stop making up words that don’t exist. It’s starting to get annoying man, so shut the fuck up. Are you still there or am I talking to myself...Hello?”

I may have been out of the narration and Knight could not here me, but I have to finish this up so I may get paid for my hard work and effort towards this.

Forest then said to his dear old friend Knight, “Knight…who are you talking to? Why does Neon have a chainsaw and is about to kill me and why am I strapped to a metal table? I’m starting to get scared now. Did we…did we do it? Please don’t tell me we did it. I rather remain straight and not a queer.”

Then Neon said for his comment in the situation they believed they were having, “This is unusual. Why would I ever use a chainsaw? I would use a tiger that is being fucked a thousand times a year by a humping frog to kill somepony. Although I don’t know why I want to kill one of my friends. Fuck it…I want to kill something today. You care to join me Knight?”

Then Knight just wanted this night to end peacefully so he could get back to his porn with a yorn.

Then Knight had a light bulb go off in his head to which he then said, “Well…how about instead we go to the bar, just the three of us instead of killing each other.”

Then Neon and Forest said, but not in unison, “Sure…That sounds good.”

Then they all went to the bar with glee in their hearts and they enjoyed every drop of beer that they had. Around their fourth round of liquor, they were silent to one another, while old country music played in the background in the bar in the town of Stalia. Then Neon said, “Fuck it, I still want to kill Forest.”

Then Neon started to attack Forest with furious force, while Forest was screaming in agony, to which he yelled out loud for every pony to hear, but sadly no one cared about him at all, “Oh god why!? This hurts so much! Why oh why! Ooooo…a bit.”

Tis conclude a very holly and jolly special for tonight. The moral of the story here is…don’t fuck with Dr. Seuss, or he’ll kick your ass with a fass, good night, and have pleasant dreams while this song randomly plays out of nowhere.

Fire Factory
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Fire Factory

Fire factory
It was a sunny day. All the Pegasus were up and about the entire day. Some were going to work, while others were going to school. It had been over twenty years since Knight had shown up, and much has changed.

For one thing, Misty Midnight was forced to go to school in Cloud City, a Pegasus city that was near Stalia that was sort of like the clone to Cloudsdale, except it was for Stalia.

Forest and Arrell lived there as children and grew up there as well. Misty Midnight had surely grown over the past few years with her friends Shadow and White, but she had to make new friends in Cloud City.

She had been enrolled at the Pegasus school, so she could know how to make weather happen and control it as well. It was a big day for her today, for there was a big test for her to do that she must past.

If she had not passed the test, she would have had failed the course, however, she did not hear what she would have to do if she failed the course.

No one did, but no one knew, for it was a mystery what happened to those who failed deemed worthless.

She had to fly through a course of clouds and do everything perfect, or she would fail instantly.

Her teacher walked up to her right before the test started and told her and all of her classmates along with her, “Good morning everyone, and of course you are all expecting some kind of test from me today. Well, I’m not going to do that because, well I’m too lazy to go through with the test and it’s too much paper work to go through, so instead I’m just going to test on you on your drinking skills. Whoever drinks the most beer wins and will not be sent to the Fire Factory…I mean, Weather Factory. Any volunteers?”

No one raised his or her hoof up, to which the teacher said, “Well fine then…you all fail. I hope burn in hell! Fuckers…don’t know anything about fun…it’s awesome to have a drinking game!”

Then a pony in a black suit said to all of the students, “Alright, you all heard him, you all failed. Now get in the carriage now or some shit like that!”

Then…

Knight’s POV…

Get the fuck out out…get the fuck out of here! Stupid narrators. I swear to you, they come from out of nowhere and they just annoy you the hell out of you. My apologize, but I was a little late getting here, mostly because me and Wolf made a bet of who can take a bigger shit, me or him, which I won.

That means that I’m the man…because you know…it’s a guy thing. Anyways, let me spice things up here and shit.

So, anyways, basically the pony in the suit said…whatever the fuck he said before I came in here, to which a pony then said, “Is this a sex thing?”

Then the pony in the suit stared at him and took off his black sunglasses, by the way, he had a pair of those, but the shitty narrator couldn’t handle it.

Anyways, they then met one another’s eyes, to which he said, “It can if you want it to be.”

Yeah, strangely enough, it wasn’t funny that day. I don’t know why, but it wasn’t. I guess they were trying to be funny on purpose, but only because it was a slow day.

You know, those slow days where nothing is going on, so you either create mayhem or blow your brains out in front your children. That’s a guarantee to stir something up and get the day going and your blood pumping.

Well, long story short, with nothing funny is going on, they all got into the wagon or carriage, for I have no fucking clue whatsoever. Well, when Misty got in, for a while, she looked depressed until she saw her two friends Shadow and White sitting next to her.

She had surprised eyes, for non-Pegasus ponies, (Except for me…bitches…) could not walk on clouds for whatever reason. Maybe they didn’t have enough magic in them, like they didn’t believe enough like the care bears would.

You know, those stuffed little fuckers that are so…soft and nice and…fluffy…so fluffy you want to do something to them…something very…very…very…naughty…ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Well then, aside from my dark and terrible secret I just told you about, Misty asked her two friends, “Shadow…White…what are you doing in Cloud City? I thought you couldn’t walk on clouds because you weren’t a Pegasus like me?”

Then Shadow said, “Well, my big brother got really drunk and he decided to catapult me into the sky, which I just ended up in the carriage here by a long shot…and an amazing coincidence too.”

Then White put in his input into the conversation, “Yeah, my big brother really wanted to get rid of me, so he paid a few pegasi into kidnapping me and putting me here.”

Misty then asked, “Well…do you know where we’re going?”

Then Shadow said, “I asked if I could be let out, but the guy said he rather stick his pony dick in a cheerio…whatever that is…and he said some where “special” ponies go.”

Then a retarded pony came the fuck out of nowhere…hold on…let me emphasize that word.

Then a retard pony came the FUCK out nowhere, to which he then said to the gang, “duuuuuuuhhhh……My parents said I’m special. Are we going to place with lollipops and a midget farm? My daddy said that’s where special ponies like me go to forever and ever while he does my mommy with a purple stick that vibrates and wiggles around a lot.”

The gang decided to ignore the retard and continue to talk. Misty then said with fear in her voice, “Well, I hope where we’re going isn’t bad. I did not know I was going to fail the test. I mean, I was just forced to come up here and go to school instead of being below where my father’s ghost is at most of the time. I do miss him so. I miss him with all of my heart. I don’t want to be away from him, he’s all I’ve got except for you two, but he’s always there for me, living or dead, to teach me from right from wrong and help me get up when I’ve fallen. I miss him so much right now. I wish they did not have to force me to be up here to go to school like a normal Pegasus. I just want to go home.”

Misty was then crying her eyes out, but not too much where she would be sobbing and there would be small puddles everywhere. Then White said, “Don’t worry Misty, we’re your friends. We’ll help you get through this. Besides, we’re the Cutie Mark Crusaders of Stalia…remember, so we will never abandoned each other. No matter what happens, we’ll be here for you.”

Then Misty slowly started to form a little smile on her face, while a moment that you would hear some heart touching music play in the background and the flutes do some kind of shit.

Well, then the retard butted in and he said as the little attention whore he was said, “Hey guys, watch me do something that’s awesome!”
Then the retard pony put his hoof in his mouth, to which he reached his uvula and he puked up all of in internal organs. Then the retard said, “Good night everybody!”

Then the retard collapsed and ruined the touching moment that you have just witnessed. Well, after a few hours, the carriage eventually stopped, to which everyone was forced off the carriage.

Then a pony in a black suit, who I guess was Will smith because he sounded like a black guy and he was a Zebra as well…a flying…fucking zebra…I thought I would never see or hear the day about that.

Well, Will smith said, “Alright, everyone out, end of the road and…hey, where’s everypony else at?”

Then what Will saw was that every pony on the carriage ate each other because most of them were fat guys who couldn’t help to not eat anything for thirty minutes and decided to eat each other except for Misty, Shadow, and White.

It is true though that fat guys do that, because they do eat each other, they even eat a half dead fat guys if they wanted to do such a thing.

However, it is just the American way…you just got burned America…you just got burned…onto other cool stuff.

Well, Will then said, “Well, I suppose you three will do just fine, but since it’s just you three, there’s no point to give you a tour of the place and background information about what’s going to happen to you since you’re going to die anyways. Besides, it’s only for black people…like me…because I’m black.”

Then Shadow asked, “What’s a black guy?”

Then He said, “The guy who did your mom last night.”

Then Shadow said, “My big brother brutally killed and murdered my mom with a butcher knife in her sleep, so that’s impossible.”

Then Will had an angry face on and he said, “Get your ass out now! Right now, damn it! You’re ass is going to die first since you ruined a very funny joke! I thought you were my friend you son of a bitch!”

Then Shadow said, “But we just met.”

Then Will said, “I know… I don’t have many friends. I found out they only liked me because they didn’t want to offend me because I was black… and they didn’t want to get sued or anything… but they also wanted to be my friend so they can say the N word all they want.”

Then White asked, “What’s the N word?”

Then Will said, “Shut the fuck up you Nipper”

Then eventually the gang got out of the carriage and went to where they were directed to, to which it was the killing floor.

Once all three of them had a good look around the room, Shadow then asked, “Wow… what is this place? Is this what heaven looks like that Mac told me about?”

Then a hooded pony and a black cloak said in a very deep voice, “No… this is your doom!”

Then Misty said in a very nervous voice, “Who are you… and why are we here?”

Then the mysterious pony said, “I am the one who will bring your end and brake you and bring you onto your very knees and pray to god it will be over quick. You were brought here because you failed the test, therefore you are deemed worthless and shall be forgotten you ever existed, for you ever shunned away from Cloud City. However, you are not all useless, you are “Special”. You see, with your souls, we can keep the fire burning and continue to burn as long as we feed it souls. However, the only way that can be done if we kill you first.”

Then Shadow thought for a moment, until he said, “Wait a second here… I recognize that voice anywhere. Is that you…Forest?”
Then Forest took off his hood and he said, “Yes… it is I… Forest Fire!!!"

"I am the one who was behind this who have burned and killed innocent ponies, but only for the greater good! Now you all shall suffer, and I will make sure you will burn as well children, including you Misty. I might have helped you out in the past, but it was only because I knew you were going to be kidnapped, just like how I was, so you could past the test, but you failed. Therefore, you shall ever be shunned from me and Cloud City. You are a fucking disgrace to the pegasi! Now, I shall kill you and take your souls to keep the fire going for all of eternity, and you will never see heaven! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!”

Then Misty cut into Forest’s evil laughter and she asked, “But…can’t you just use wood to burn the fire instead of using ponies that fail the test?”

Then Forest said with a nervous look on his face, “N… no! We need to use ponies who… failed the… test!”

Then White said, “No… I’m pretty sure you can just use regular wood to keep the fire going and spare a lot of lives and trouble you know.”

Then Forest said with a even more nervous face, “No!!!... Shut up!!!!”

Then Shadow asked Forest a simple question, to which was, “Are you only doing this because of Rainbow Dash?”

Then Forest finally broke and he ran crying to his private office, while the kids just stood there as they looked at each other and wondered what the fuck just happened.

Well, Forest ran crying to his office, to which he locked the door, grabbed some whiskey, and curled up in a corner while having the lights turned off which was completely dark. He was also rocking back and forth while having wide eyes as he was still crying just a bit.
Then somepony knocked on his door to which they said, “Sir… you need to come out.”

Then Forest yelled to the guy, “No, leave me alone!”

Then the guy said, “But sir… they need you on the killing floor. They need you to kill somepony. The backers even need you to kill some pony so they know you’re not slacking off and doing your duty and city a huge favor.”

Then Forest said and yelled once more, “No… they’ll make fun of me!!!”

Then the guy said, “But you can just kill them and they won’t be able to… you know what I give up.”

Then the guy left, to which Forest then drunk his sorrows away with the whiskey he had. Then he said to himself, “Fucking bitch. I only wanted to do this because Rainbow Dash was doing this at the Rainbow Factory. I mean, I spied on her through the window, and instead of reporting what I saw, I wanted to grab her attention so she could notice me and shit. Well I don’t need her… nor do I need this job. Fuck the backers… and fuck this city in the clouds! I need a night out.”

Then Forest then had a drunken idea in his drunken mind to which he then walked out of his office, in a drunk walk I should say, and went back to the gang. Then Forest said to them, “Come on guys… let’s go to the bar.”

Then Misty said, “But… we’re underage. We’re not allowed to get any alcohol of any type until we turn sixteen.”

Then Forest said, but with a more of a grudge in his voice, “I said… let’s go… now!”

Then the gang went with Forest to the bar, but only in fear. Damn, and I thought Neon was scary and you did things for him out of fear. Well, they were at the bar, and the kids were drinking some beer with Forest, which some how they got away without being the legal age limit.

Well, Forest then said, very like a drunk man would say out loud, “Wooo!!! We’re good friends, getting drunk…. and having just a good time! I needed this… thanks my friends… my “Special”… friends!”

Then White said to Shadow, “I’m starting to get scared now. First, he wanted to kill us and now he’s taking us out for a night out. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?”

Shadow just shrugged, as he still didn’t know what the fuck was going on… until I entered in.

I then walked up to Forest, completely ignoring that kids were getting drunk in front of me, “Hey Forest, I just wanted to stop by and let you know I’ll be gone for the week… again as usual.”

Then Forest had a pissed off look on his face, to which he said to me, “Oooohhhh looky here. A so called “friend” of mine is here to cheer me up. What a fucking surprise! You think you’re so special with you going to Cantorlot every month and going to see the princess and god and shit! Well what makes you so special… huh! You were one of us… a normal drunk guy… and now you’re a gentlemen colt drunk guy! What do you think of them apples?”

Then I said, “Clearly you’re drunk, but I’m pretty sure you know the drill by now that I leave for about a week and spend the week in Cantorlot, as Celestia and Luna need me there as always… ever since the discovery happened… but uhhhhh…. yeah… enjoy your beer, I hope you get alcohol poisoning.”

Then as I was walking away, he yelled at me, “Well gooooood for you! Let’s go to a strip club kids…”

They then had a funny look on their face, which they then went to a pony strip club.

Well, Forest was getting a special lab dance with kick ass music playing in the background, while the gang was at the pole dancing area. Misty said, “Why did he bring us here again?”

Then Shadow said, “I don’t really know… but you do have to admit the music is pretty good.”

Then white said, and keep in mind he’s about ten years of age by now, “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m enjoying this. I like how these mares look at me. They look kind of hot too”

White just stared like he was in a trance at one of the strippers, not really knowing that this wasn't the place for him. But he didn't care as he was enjoying the scenery of the place.

A few months more and he’ll be able to find out the joy of porn… but only because he has Jack as a brother who teaches him jack shit, so of course he’ll act this way.

While the kids were looking around the place, Forest was having the time of his life. He was drinking a lot of beer, while two mares were showing their sweet…hot…asses to his face, while Forest slapped their asses really hard to get him horny and a boner.

That and possibly lose his virginity as well. While Forest was slapping their asses, he was yelling at them, “Woooo! Shake that ass you bitch! Make my dick hard you slut ass whore! I want to feel baby! That’s right honey…get on my dick and feel it get hard and vibrating!”
While Forest saying that, he was receiving a double lap dance from both of the mares. Then the mares started to make out in front of him, which Forest got a major boner from that and started to jack off.

Then a third mare walked up to him and showed him her pussy, while Forest, “Wow…what a hole! I want to do you so badly now, but it’s against the law. Oh well…take my bits and shove them up your pussy bitch! I want to see you queef that out of your vagina you slut!”
Then a security guard came by and he said to Forest, “I’m sorry sir, but I have to ask you to leave. You have been causing a ruckus since you got here.”

Then Forest said back to him, “Awe…but I don’t want to leave. The ladies want me to stay with me because they love me and they think I’m hot!”

The security guy then said, “No, they only like you because you only giving them money. In fact, they’re taking a bit of a risk to come to you for money because they really need it, because you killed three strippers tonight…by shoving bits down their throats.”

Then Forest said, “Yeah…but they asked for it. They were even begging me to put my big fat cock in their mouths. You could tell in their eyes they liked to suck cock.”

Then Forest got thrown out of the bar, while the kids weren’t forced to leave, even though they should’ve, they went with Forest for they were confused…a whole lot with gender, sex, and Forest.

The security guy said, “You are banned for one week Forest! Until then…stay the fuck out!”

Then the security guy left, but Forest then yelled back, “You can’t do that to me! You’re not a moderator…you’re not a Knighty! Come on kids… I know who’s to blame for this mess.”

Then…the kids followed Forest, to which…well I’m not sure what happened…but pretend there’s one of those classic batman transitions. Well, they then were at the Rainbow Factory, standing in front of its gates. And yes, they were on the white fluffy clouds.

The gang and Forest also had a bunch of toilet papers with them, and holding one in each hoof as they were standing there, looking up at the gates of the factory where not a single soul get’s through.

Misty then asked Forest, “Forest…why are we at the Rainbow Factory?”

Then Forest said, “We’re going to get pay back for that whore of a Rainbow Dash for getting us banned from the strip club!”

Then Shadow said, “But we’re not banned…we can still see pony pussy…no offense Misty.”

Then Forest yelled at the three of them, “Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut up! Ok then…on my mark…throw the jellyfish!”

Then White corrected Forest with, “Toilet paper you mean.”

Then Forest responded with, “Whatever, TP!!!”

Forest then, and only him started to TP the Rainbow Factory. After Forest threw his first roll, the kids followed as well, and threw much toilet paper as well, while Forest only threw one and some reason laughing his ass off for whatever reason.

Forest then said while still trying not to laugh, “Take that you bitch! That will teach you to get me banned from a fucking strip club! You bitch…you think you better than me! Well fuuuuuuuuuuuuck you! Fuck you, fuck you, and fuck you! I tried to do everything for you whore, been trying to get you to notice me, from afar, so we can be together, and this is how you repay me! I was a laughing stock at the Fire Factory, while you have all the fame and glory at the Rainbow Factory! Well fuck you bitch! Fuck you right up in the asshole!”

Then Factory Dash stepped out, to which she said, “What are you even talking about? Why are you throwing toilet paper at the factory while I’m trying to kill innocent little ponies? And….are you drunk Forest?”

Then Forest said in a drunk state to Factory Dash, “It’s called beer bitch. Also, we’re TPing you slut…get with the program man! I’m fucking high as shit man! Because I got some weed from a hippy pony before I came here man! Get with the fucking peace man!! Fuck you man!!! Go to hell and die you bitch!!!!”

While forest was swearing up a storm, Factory Dash also had wide and shocking eyes what he was saying to her right up in her face…with a big disgrace…not sure where they came from.

Anyways, Forest then pulled out a bottle of liquor and a lighter, spat on the flames with beer, and set Factory Dash on fire, which she was then screaming in pain. She was going all over the place, which she went back into the factory, hit something that was flammable, and burned the entire Rainbow Factory down as well.

Once the kids saw burning children running out of the building, they were scarred for life. Then Forest said to them, “Wooo…we did it! Let’s go back to my place and celebrate!”

Then they mysteriously appeared at Forest’s home in the clouds, and strangely enough, an Earth Pony and a Unicorn was able to walk on clouds without a spell done on them was possible that day.

Well, the kids entered Forest’s home, which was a nice big home may I add, and sat in the living room while Forest singed, “Ceeeeeeeeelabration time, come on! We fucking did it! Celebrate good times…come on! Celebrate good times come on!”

Then Misty asked her friends while Forest was really drunk, “What are we supposed to do guys? I’m afraid to do anything right now. I mean, are we supposed to get killed by him or just walk away from everything?”

Then Shadow said, “I’m not sure at all.”

Then Forest was in his kitchen, at his fridge, while he asked the gang, “Hey guys…you want some cloud beers to celebrate!?”
Then White said, “No thank you good sir…we don’t want to die tonight.”

Then Forest said to them, “You are all a bunch of fucking pussies…that’s what you all are! You’re all pussies because you don’t want to party. My friends knows how to fucking party! Maybe I should invite Knight…he can walk on clouds and shit….fffuck!”

Well, meanwhile…in the legion of doom…ok never mind. Anyways, I was in Cantorlot at the time, having dinner with Celestia, Luna, and Fausticorn, also god in this universe.

Oh….right…and Wolf as well, along with Twilight in the mix with her big ass Alicorn wings.

Although, she wasn’t at the table, but having dinner with her parents somewhere in Cantorlot at the time.

Well, like I said, I was having dinner with god. That was even awesome to say…because….you know…how many others can say that they had dinner with god and his or her children?

You know what would even be more amazing and mind blowing, if you were the child of god and having dinner with god and his or her children. It’s like the matrix or something, because I just blew your mind.

Anyways, aside from…not really a joke…we were having a vegetarian dinner of course, because ponies don’t eat meat…ok maybe a tiny bit. Well, we were discussing about…politics.

What an exciting adventure I fucking had and you can tell how pissed I am right now can you?

Well, Celestia was saying, “And that’s why I believe the thirty-fourth district of heaven should be run by Juicy apples instead of blitzing balls mother.”

Then mother said, and yes, we’re going by that name…because really there’s nothing really else to call her other then god and in its repetitive I chose to do that…hint hint…not sure what I just hinted there…but hint hint.

Well, mother said, “Well, I do see your point of view of things Celestia, but I believe Mr. Balls could handle things and situations more properly then Mr. Apples could do. Besides, I have known him for years, even when I remember you were only of five years of age. Besides, you should trust your mother, I know what I’m doing”

Then Celestia said, “I suppose so…you are my elder…just like how every pony should treat their elders…Knight.”

Celestia then looked at me with an angry face, while I said, “Listen, for the last fucking time Celestia. I know what you’re trying to do here Celestia. I know you’re afraid of losing me again, I know that you want me to be what I was meant to be long ago, but it is my fucking job…and I need to do my fucking job. Besides I am bound to the universe, so there is no way of getting out of it.”

Then Celestia said to me with an even more of an angry tone in her used to be sweet tone, “Well perhaps sometimes you should respect your elders and treat them for they are wiser and older.”

Then I yelled back at her, “I’m fucking thousands of years older then you bitch!”

Then Celestia said back to me while mother was having a worried look on her face, “Well, in my book that’s what it used to be…but not anymore.”

I then yelled back at her, “What…you want to do it bitch!? You want to fight again…I’ll fucking rip your skull out of your head in merely seconds!”

Then she yelled back, “Dare to do so and you shall feel the wrath of my anger unleashed upon your soul!”

We were then on the table, ready to attack each other, until mother said, “Celestia…Knight! I thought I told you to stop this at once. I specifically told you two not to fight and just agree to disagree. Celestia, you know better than this…I raised you from a small filly and taught you better.”

I then said to Celestia, “That’s right you fucking bitch.”

Then mother said to me, “And you Knight…look…I know I wasn’t there for you back then…but I know you have those good manners in you…you just need to embrace them. Besides, Celestia does have a point, you barely spend any time with us…perhaps you should let TK start to take over your position and start spending more time with us? Besides, you’re growing up way too fast…I missed out so much on you that I wish that I could have back…you’re even older then what I am. I’m only merely almost over sixty thousand years old, while you’re almost ninety thousand years old. You’ve got to understand to let things go Knight. You need to let go and forget and start a new Knight. Forget about your enemies and let them go…just let your human nature go and come back to us Knight. Come back to us and let go Knight.”

I then sat there looking down on the floor, having a confused look on my face, until I said, “Look, can’t we talk about something else right now other then this again?”

Then Luna said, “Well, you do need to let go Knight. You do have a problem of letting things go…and you need to listen to us and ask for our help. However, I suppose we can talk about this another time. Well…what’s your opinion on mother’s matter for the leader of the thirty-fourth district in Heaven Knight?”

They then stared at me until I gave them an answer, which was, “Well…if you ask me…first thing first. Is it a black guy?”

Then mother said, “Well, I know what a black guy is…but what does a black guy have to do with anything about leading a district?”

Then I said, “Well, usually a black guy would lead a district…or in my experience…country…into deep shit that no one can get out of because of the black guy. Well, in this case…the zebra…although I can’t tell them apart because they’re all the same to me.”

They then stared at me…with confused eyes, until I said, “You know what…I’m going to bed.”

Then Wolf and I headed straight to my bedroom while Wolf said to me, “He he…she said balls…he he.”

Then after a few hours of getting some good night’s sleep, I then got a call on my phone or thingy communicator that I give all to my team, which was Forest who was on the other end, and he was saying, “Hey Knight…fuck you!”

Then I said to him, “Forest…stop trying to prank call me on the communicator.”

Then Forest said, “Come on Knight…come over to my place and party with me!”

I then said to him and a loud whisper, “It’s three in the fucking morning. What is wrong with you? I have a meeting to go to with Celestia and Luna in Heaven at seven, now go to sleep.”

Then Forest said while drinking a cloud beer, “Come on Knight…I just drunk five hundred gallons of beer tonight and…”

Then Forest passed out, to which I hanged up and I said, “I hope he’s dead.”

Well, then a week passed by, and yes… I said a week, when Forest finally woke up, while the CMC of Stalia was saying, “Is he dead? Should we bury his dead body with a not-so proper funeral?”

Then Forest said…with a moan since he had a hangover, “aweeeeeee…what happened?”

Shadow then said, “You passed out Forest from all of the beer you drunk.”

Then Forest said, “I did? How long was I out for?”

Then White said, “You were out for a week.”

Then Forest said, “A week!? My friends must be so worried about me right now!”

Then Misty said, “Nope…they were worried for a bit at first, but three days ago they stopped caring for you. If you want we can take you down to meet them.”

And so they did, which we were hanging out at the…at the… spa for men and coffee place? I really don’t fucking know any more…ok? Well, eventually Forest came to us, to which I said, “Oh look, he’s not dead…dam it…”

Then Jack was looking at the newspapers of The Equestria Daily News, to which he said, “Check it out guys…apparently Forest here is a hero.”

Then Forrest said, “I am?”

Then Jack continued to say, “Yeah…you are. According to this, you burned down the Rainbow Factory and reveled its darkest and horrible secrets. And apparently the backers of the place were arrested and put in a dungeon not too long ago as well.”

I then said, “Well son of a bitch and call me a monkey’s bitch…well then. I also suppose pigs fly now.”

Then Forest said, “Wait…is…Rainbow Dash’s dead burned corpse still there?”

Then Jack said, “Yeah…they didn’t lay a hoof on it since she died on a cloud.”

Then Forest said, “Um…I’ve got to go…I’ve got this thing to…”

Then Forest rushed out of the building and went to Ponyville, or Cloudsdale for that matter. I then asked, “Is he going to do what I’m think he’s do…”

Then Jack said, “Yup…he is.”

Then moments later, Forest was having sex with Rainbow Dash’s dead body.

He was really banging the dead body too, like every girl’s dream of being banged like that, while Forest was saying, “Please forgive me Rainbow Dash. I’m so sorry that I called you a slut. Can you ever forgive me? Your hair smells pretty today…and you look awesome…and your creepy opened eyes with your opened mouth is also looking good today…please don’t haunt me tonight.”

A Fires tale is not quite as blunt,
Of the story we knew of sticks and stones.
A fire’s easy once you get to know it,
With the help of a magic of a lap dance at a bar,
Let’s delve deeper into fire philosophy
Far beyond that of Cloud City’s idiotic tendencies.
It’s so easy to forget that shitty city,
With it’s burning corpses, and social insanity.
But with all shitty things comes a great irresponsibility,
Of that Cloud City keeping the fire alive
How you ask, are they up to the task,
To which the answer is in a simple loser.
In the Fire Factory, where shits and giggles come true,
In the Fire Factory, where all souls burn to death,
In the Fire Factory, where all shits and giggles come true.

My Little Pony: Universal Magic: The Lost Episode
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

My Little Pony: Universal Magic: The Lost Episode

Author's Note

I do apologize for this one, however it was just sitting around my computer and it certainly was going no where. So just do what you want with it, and do keep in mind that this was written right after the second ban that was placed on me as well. However, as time went by, I have decided this is no longer relevant, but I really don't care about it, so I'm just putting it on here for the sake of it being on here, no other intentions whatsoever.

UPDATE: At some point in the future, I plan on re-doing the whole thing actually trying to make it slightly interesting. I was supposed to have done it like a few weeks ago but I forgot, got lazy and went and did other stuff. So now I don't know when I'm going to do it. And I had a really good idea too what I wanted to do with it but I forgot... should have written it down...

Oh yeah and I apologize for the cringe too, I forget I even wrote this, let alone what's in it even.

My Little Pony: Universal Magic: The Lost Episode

I used to love/hate the My Little Pony: Universal Magic fan fic.

It was horrible. I didn’t get it because it wasn’t the style I was used to, but at the same time, it was doing something that other fics wasn’t doing…like saying the F-bomb a thousand times, having the F-bomb game, the characters were like…What The Fuck.

It was simple and an original idea, but the style was different…and I hate different and I love generic shit. Therefore, I hate it, but I for some reason kept reading it.

Perhaps it was due to the fact that it had racist jokes, perhaps because it had drugs in it or alcohol in it.

Perhaps…because of Neon and Wolf, those two crazy bastards. I even gave the author of such fic, TheKnight21js, a review of said fic, which I gave it a point five out of ten (.5/10)

He then told me that I got the wrong idea, which I knew, but I just ignored him and immediately saw him as a terriost threat and reported him to the FBI, because that is some suspicious shit right there.

Well, he was bitchy for a while, and then he vanished. Some say he was a douchebag, while others say he left because of me, while others say…absolutely nothing at all.

Well, he then came back to the site, to which he came back and continued to put the chapters up.

I was very eager to read, but still hate on him, with emotional characters, even though I complained about how it wasn’t described enough, even though you don’t describe an emotionless person…because he’s emotionless, and think the characters have dirty mouths that needs soap in their mouths. Well, when he came back, he was different.

He didn’t say a word, nor talk to his friend for months, or comment back to any of his fics, nor run his groups, not even update his blogs…he just posted the fics and that was all.

Then, one day, he put up a new chapter for the fic, to which it was called…”normal”.

I was curious as to why he named it that way, it didn’t even say chapter on it or episode. So I clicked on it, and I regret that decision.

When I started to read it, it started off normal, with Knight being a douchebag to Neon and Wolf getting anal from Princess Molestia.

Then…it all changed. He then started to apologize to Neon….I started to get nervous about this. He then said, “I’m going to quit smoking weed and stop drinking beer forever.”

That’s not normal for him to do. Then, Wolf didn’t speak a single line in the chapter. In fact, he was a normal Timber Wolf, which all he did was be nice and not act like a troll.

Man, it gives me Goosebumps whenever I think about it. Then, something was missing…Knight wasn’t in first person telling the story. Instead, it was nice and descriptive chapter in third person, with big and fancy words.

My god there were so many big and fancy words, I thought the apocalypse was upon us.

I mean, there were so many words, I didn’t know what they meant. I mean, that’s what I wanted, but it started to get boring because it was being descriptive.

It went into hundred thousand words describing how wet a towel was…it was fucking insane!

Then, there were no jokes to it…no racist jokes, not even a single curse word. It didn’t even say ‘hell’ or ‘shut up’ in it.

Knight even said in the chapter, “Saying curse words such as the word hell, and I do apologize for such a word my dearest friend in the whole wide world Wolf, and telling you to shut up, which once again, I apologize, is not a good word to say, especially in front of readers.”

He broke the fourth wall, but in not a normal way, he would have. He was acting like a fucking pussy!

However, the worst came when Neon was acting normal…and he was happy about it! He was loving just acting just how Pinkie would be doing, except not his way…it was as if I was watching the same fucking character bit in male form…I was bored as shit!

There was nothing new, but only…it was scary…and I don’t want to talk about it. Then Mac was acting like a mature adult, and teaching good manners to his little brother Shadow and being a good brother to him….this is starting to haunt my dreams!

Then, Mac Farmer went up to applejack, and apologized and was once a member of the Apple Family once more.

Then nothing new happened, it wasn’t interesting at all! Then Jack actually was a gay pony, who was into fashion like Rarity, except he was gay and not cool bro…not cool!

Then Forest actually stopped masturbating to Rainbow Dash and then he asked her out, to which it turned into a normal conversation between two lovers. My god this fic is just…nooooooooooo!

Then Arrell was acting even more of a pussie when he started to act like Fluttershy, and not breeding the animals, and not calling his pet bunny Ass-hat anymore.

What has this world come to damn it!

Also, Princess Molestia wasn’t there, at all…! Knight was also being a good student of Princess Celestia…and actually learning about something! We already learned from the show, and I started to think the past chapters were starting to look like the best fic ever, because shit was crazy!!!

Then…Knight was going out and making out with Princess Twilight Sparkle…he isn’t supposed to do that, he was supposed to hate her!

Although, I saw…or at least what I thought I saw, a way out of this darkness, which was actually something I disliked about the fic, which was it didn’t explain where and why the glowing ball of light came from…and why?

I mean, I want to know man, even though it’s like playing Clue in which you immediately before you start playing the game, you know who the killer is and what weapon was used, and then you play.

And even though there would be no point to it and that’s what the author said to me but ignored, it should still have been explained.

However, I regret that wish…because…it was revealed as to why Knight was so smart and advanced and the glowing ball of light…and it as felt as there was no purpose to the fic anymore.

It was supposed to be a mystery and the reader was supposed to form their own theories this entire time…and I wish I had realized so it would have spared me from this damn and blasted chapter!

Then…TK came out and was in the fic, and I was wondering if this would have saved the chapter at all…but I was wrong…because he was a nice and not a threatening guy.

Why!? Why I ask you…why!? He wasn’t killing anyone or being depressed as shit…in fact he had emotions I tell you!

Then, Factory Dash came in, and she was no longer insane, but stopped killing, and TF apologized for trying to kill Knight for forgetting him for over ten years.

Then the town of Stalia actually had more females and there were no more sex jokes to it, it was like a clone, but a boring clone of Ponyuville! Something that wasn’t a fresh and a new idea for the fic that was bullshit I tell you!

Then, I should mention, that this horror that I read, had no references at all, and it made me feel sad inside. I just couldn’t take it anymore, the way that they acted, the way too many big and fancy words that I wished for to be in the fic but now regret it, no cursing…it was pure hell.

Then I thought, perhaps this was a trolling prank, by the author or someone else who possibly hacked into his account.

Perhaps that’s why there were no blogs. But then, it got worse. I then started to get a picture of the characters for once, but instead in their normal form or in past chapters, they were twisted and deformed.

They had HYPER-REALISTIC BLOOD coming out of their eyes and they had HYPER-REALISTIC-EYES as well.

I even swore I saw Tom and Kyle in their somewhere. (Note: Look up Yuriofwind or bullshit creepypasta story time on YouTube to get the reference that I’m getting at, preferably the Sonic.exe one.)

Then they were in a dark room, that said on the wall written in blood, “Hopes and dreams that will never come true…all because of you!”

There were other messages such as, “You killed us” and “They hated it, we were hated, REVENGE!”

Then, there was entire picture, of the author, sitting at a typewriter, and he was just staring blankly at the camera, with no eye color, as if he had a demon inside him.

However, there was a picture of the typewriter, and it said on it, repeatedly, “All hate and no love makes a dull author.”

Then, on the final line, it said, “Kill all who oppose.”

Then…I tried to click off the page, but it wouldn’t go. I was to continue to look at said picture, so I tried to leave the room, but it was locked, and the windows were so too!

I was trapped, but then I turned around to see what was behind me, which was a killing, living Neon plushie doll with blood on it!

I now regret that I ever doubted the fic, for if you do, horrible shit will happen…

Outside of the house while this shit was going on with the guy…

The gangs of the Elements of Protection were hiding outside of the house. They were all watching as the person was going insane and being scared to shit with the chapter.

They were enjoying every bit of it with a smile on their face. Then Neon said, “This is amazing. Although I still think we should have put kitten bombs in his bosses work desk so he could be fired and I would have a soul in Neon hell.”

To which Knight said, “Shut the fuck up Neon…no one cares.”

Then Mac said, “I kind of do…because I’m pretty sure that’s where Applejack and the rest of the Apple Family is going to end up after they die so they can rot in that hell hole for my enjoyment.”

Once the person saw the bloody Neon Plushie, Knight then said, “Good, we’re done with this house. That’ll teach him to say shit about fic right guys? Now then, we could either go scare the shit out of Eldorado or Knghty.”

Then Forest said, “Let’s go scare the shit out of Knighty and teach him not to mess with us or author. Besides, it’ll fin because he’s a wizard and all British people are wizards.”

Then Knight said, “Yeah, sure, let’s go.”

TF's POV
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

TF's POV

Author's Note

This is the villain from the main Universal Magic story line's Point of View. I wrote it because I thought it would be interesting to explore. So, with that said, this does contain spoilers for the part of the main Universal Magic story line that I have not gotten too yet, but I did put a little indicator that I'm sure you'll see as to when the spoilers start. Read on if you desire, doe snot matter to me, I'm just giving you a fair warning is all.

UPDATE:

I put "spoilers" over where the spoilers come into play. Why did I put spoilers in the first place? Why not have done it at all? Honestly I don't even know why anymore. I don't even think it matters anymore. So sorry if it seem inconvenient to you. I just, not sure what to do anymore with this...

TF's POV

TF's POV:

I remember there was nothing. Not a word, no light, not a peep from a single, breathing living thing. I didn't even have a conscious. I didn't even exist...but then...all of a sudden...there was light.

So bright and burning, I felt it's warm glow as I could see and in my mind know I finally existed. I had a conscious to where I can say that I exist. I did not know that I did not existed before, so it was all in a flash to me. However what I saw before my very eyes was no other than God himself...or at least...my God. He seemed very young as I recall.

God did not look more than the age of 6, but yet he was so powerful enough to spread is radiating glow upon me and to even create me.
And I remember I knew absolutely nothing that was going on, other than remembering that I was but a small child myself as well. And to the both sides of me, I saw other companions being made, as if God was making his creations and giving us life from nothing.

However all I could think was who was I? What purpose am I to serve? What am I? Why do I exist? Where am I?

Well, let me shed a light on this darkness for you. As for starters, I was in the mind of God, in this 6 year old boy's head filled with many ideas and concepts that all little ones think about at one point in their lives. Why was I created? At first I wasn't sure, but as time went on it was for entertainment, but more less to try and become entertainment. You see this 6 year old boy wanted to make his own stories and tell it to others.

He wanted to make his own little world and so he created me and the others. That was our purpose, to tell a story, but just to tell a story, but to also use us as characters in a story that seemed to never end with him, as in we would grow alongside him and learn just he like was doing.

As for what I was, I was a human child around the same age as God's age. As for who I was...to be quite honest with you...I don't even remember my real name. It has been so long since he even called me by the name he had given me at my birth, but the ironic part is I don't even think God remembers my true name.

For who I was and what character I was playing in his silly little stories that only a child could come up with is nothing but a mystery for all of time and space. So...where is this story heading you might ask...well pipe down and I'll tell you what happens.

As I said before, I was born to be used in a story and expanded upon, and me and the other ones that were made did so. We grew up with God as God told us what to do and for the most part, we were happy. We thought everything was ok and that we were bonding together as friends.

And we did so with god, we bonded with god, we were in his heaven, he gave us life, he gave us a purpose and we were more than happy to do his bidding. However, as God aged, he seemed to slowly forget us, forget who we were. At first we had thought that God was not forgetting us...he wasn't going to leave us behind. We bonded too much for God to just leave us in the dark, we were friends, even family to him in a way.

We just thought he was God you know, he had stuff to do, always busy doing things. We were sure being a God was no easy task and we understood that at the time and thought he was going to come back to us within his mind and we would have fun once more. Soon it got to the point where we got nothing, no command, no sign of God at all. However we kept our spirits up high and tall and said that one day he was going to come back for us.

That day never came. If anything...he abandoned us...God abandoned us...HE ABANDONED US! WE WERE IN THE DARK, WE WERE IN THE SHADOWS, PUSHED BACK IN HEAVEN AS HE WENT OFF SOMEWHERE ELSE AS WE WERE FORGOTTEN! FOR YEARS AND YEARS WE WERE LEFT TO OUR OWN DEVICES AND WE HAD ONLY OURSELVES! WE...lost all hope.

Sure we were still in his heaven...but forgotten...how ironic...we were in God's place, his paradise, his home and yet...we were pushed back to the back of his mind forgotten. We sat there for years...waiting for a call, a signal, anything to make us believe that it was all a misunderstanding...but it wasn't.

We saw that he made more creations...more stories that he paid more attention to than us. When we found out he was making more creations...we knew we were know longer loved. He had clearly abandoned us and forgotten us...sure we were still in heaven, but forgotten?

Let me tell you something....have you ever been loved but then abandoned by that love? If so...it hurts so much and you know it as much as I do. Oh how much does it hurt to be forgotten. To be alone...to even be abandoned by God himself...the very same entity that created us!?

How much sad it was indeed that day...we were crying tears...but yet we were still there. Some of us felt like not giving up hope...but as the years went on...we slowly grew a grudge against God...wanting him to pay for his crimes...but then again...he was God...he was all powerful and mighty...we were just in his head...with little to nothing we could do to help ourselves.

If anything...God could just wipe us from existence if he wanted to do so...so all we could do was nothing but wait. However, sadly we fell upon hard times even further as we fell out of heaven sort of...but more or less to the very back parts of it...the part where everything goes the becomes forgotten, and if possible...decay and completely become non-existent.

That's where we were put at because God had forgotten us and didn't even seem to remember us at all. He was concentrating on his other creations that he had loved while we were stuck in this hell hole...what seemed to be like purgatory for us. However, thankfully he still remembered most of us or else we would decay and no longer exist...most of us that is.

Some of us were not that lucky and God forgot about them completely and so they decayed..and it was a horrible way to go.

It seemed as right before they decayed..they were in complete pain and agony...asking and begging for the pain to stop. I remember we tried to survive, and we would, but everyone would fear and hope that God wouldn't forget us so we wouldn't decay. All seemed like contact with God was...all but gone...but then came the day that we never thought would occur.

God remembered us just vaguely and was right at our door step and where we were left at for the past ten years! And right beside him was two angels....one named TK and the other one Factory Dash, one of the angles he met and the other one he created. So great, even one of his new creations he made became an angle...oh delightful...while the rest of us was stuck in purgatory, hoping that we didn't decay.

And guess what....God even gave himself a name...Knight. Why he gave himself that name...I'll never know why...but one thing is for sure...he was here physically...where we could hurt him and get revenge on him for leaving us in the dust. However...he had his angels to help him. And we tried...but all was lost as God and his angels fought back obviously...and one by one he killed us all.

Well...except for me...I was the only one left alive...but all my other friends were gone..all gone and dead...never to be seen again. There wasn't even a place for their souls to go as their souls died. And I was the only one left.

All I can remember was being on my knees and weeping with sadness and despair in my heart. I cried and I cried and I cried...not knowing what was going to happen next. Then one of the angels was about to kill me, and I was begging for death...if God was going to kill his first creations, he might as well kill them all...but instead he had one of his little dogs do it for him while God barely wounded us.
However, I didn't care...I just wanted to embrace death's shadow and forever be in complete nothingness...back to how it all was for me in the beginning. But then God ordered his angel to spare me...so I ask....why? Why did God let me live? FOR ME TO SUFFER!!!?

I do not know why he did the things he did...but all I knew for sure...I hated God and his angels...especially the angel that he called TK....oh how much do I hate that angel. He was the one who could have ended me and very easily too...but he didn't...even if he didn't want to obey his God. And you know what the ironic part is?

TK is a demon...a demon metaphorically at first....but physically in another time. Oh....I just wanted to abandon all hope...as it was all lost for me...but yet...I was still alive and well. Sure, my heart was gone...but yet I still kept on going. Sure it felt like being thrown out of Heaven's gate, but I was still alive. So...all I could think about was getting revenge.

Revenge revenge revenge. That's all I could ever think about....and so I made a plan without thinking and my first attempt to get rid of God was to go to where he live in his past, to where he had just created me...and kill him. He was a child then...so young and defenseless. Granted I wasn't sure if I was going to still exist or not...but whatever else was going to happen...at least he would be dead....and I killed him.

But somehow beyond my logic...God was still there...weak..but still alive...and the angel TK only grew ever stronger...and soon foiled my plans and put me to shame. So...what else was I to do. Well this time I made a plan with thinking involved. It's a long explanation of how it all worked...but let's just say on a night when God was celebrating and when he was all alone...I gave him a little surprise...and tried to put him in a universe where he couldn't get out of. At least then God wouldn't be where I was...but sadly he took me with him...and we both was stuck.

At the time...I was pissed...but at least I could hunt him down and kill him since his precious angels weren't around to protect him. And the best part? The universe we ended up at was a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic universe. And you know what was even better?

God was a child again...a 4 year old somehow...and I was an adult pony. It would have been so easy to kill him in a world where death and violence only comes around every now and then....not only to mention we ended up in a forest from any other ponies in this universe...and God was only a 4 year old little boy. It's so easy...so easy to kill him...so vulnerable...so weak...God didn't even have anything to defend himself...so why was I still defeated I ask? WHY!?

Only I remember was that God tried to make something to defend himself...but that ended up backfiring while at the same time working by making an explosions that pushed us both back with force. In the end he was found by a couple of ponies and taken away with care, while I ended up being unconscious for a few hours and when I woke up I found a few vultures flying around in the sky waiting for me to become dead and some Timber Wolves ready to bite my fucking face off.

How sad. I managed to escape the animals...but what I didn't know is where did God go? Well...he ended up with Royalty from this Universe and landed a soft and choosy spot right next to a Princess as he got adopted by one...I believe her name was Princess Celestia or something like that. Well...you could imagine how pissed I was...but I didn't stop trying. A few weeks later...I was able to kidnap him and took him far away from the little kingdom he was living at...and as I was about to kill him, on a foggy night, he started to cry.

I stopped for a bit and wondered why would God, such a mighty foe of mine...cry? Well...then again he was a 4 year old, weak, and defenseless...death would scare anyone in that situation. So...as I was about to kill God...his adoptive mother swooped down and saved him in the last few seconds before god's total demise.

And was the mother ever so pissed at me for trying to kill her adopted son. Granted she was acting like any mother would, like how a mother eagle protects her babies. She was ready to kick my ass and send me to the dungeons for all of eternity...but I escaped as she sent guards towards my way. Again...I escaped...and clearly was between a rock and a hard place...a place where I couldn't get out of.

So....I wondered around for a while, wondering what to do next...I ended up finding a cave to live at near the kingdom where God lived...but won't you know it...it is almost as if fate was trying to have God be killed by me, as God wondered into the cave by himself. I hid at first, just to make sure his protective mother wasn't with him, but he was alone mumbling to himself of how he wants to go back to his home...to his heaven...and that he was having a hard time trying to fit into his new role as a 4 year old that belonged to a princess that ruled the land known as Equestria.

So...when God wasn't looking, I went behind him and was about to strangle the life out of him...right before fate changed everything and TK charged at me. Soon we had a little reunion...and according to God's angel TK...1,000 years has passed since God was back in his heaven. apparently time had worked differently here. In fact..all the universes worked in different ways and there was no sure way to tell the correct time.

So for me...I had lost plenty of time. So...God knew that he had lost just about everything except for his place in heaven and decided to stay with his new adopted mother and try to fit in with the world around him and try to forget about his past. All I had to say that he was a coward...a God leaving his land behind...he couldn't even face me and look at me in the eyes before he left. He left weeping with tears as TK dragged me back to where I belonged and told me to never leave my home again...the place where God and his angels killed my friends.

And so...I did...what else was I to do? God was in a better place, his angels moved on to other things...if anything else it was all depressing to me as there was nothing to do but to wait and die like my friends. And so I did...right until I got word that God came back to face his fears...but he spent that doing it alone...all by himself for 30,000 years. All alone for that period of time...I almost felt bad for him....now he was feeling how I had felt when all of my friends were dead...alone.

He knew how we felt. Towards the end of the 30,000 years of loneliness....I was about to go to him and embrace him into my arms as I started to have a little spot for him in my heart. Hell, I think we could have been friends once more...but as I was about to, God wasn't so lonely...in fact he wasn't sad at all...all that he said was that he was going to go to a new universe and retire from him being God...escape from all of his troubles and relax in a peaceful place...in another My Little Pony universe.

God was even sure that he was going to have peace for all of eternity and not have to worry about a single thing and possibly never see his creations again. Again...a coward...a son of a bitch that can't take care of his creations right. He was about to abandon all of his creations...again...including me as well. So that made me pissed off indefinitely...so as God and his angel TK left...I followed him. I followed him into this My Little Pony universe without even TK knowing that I was right behind him. I even made it passed them and set up a trap to kill them both...and for good.

However, the short story is that once more it backfired...and what ended up happening was that the angel was sent back into heaven was not allowed to leave for a 1,000 years while me and God was once more stuck in the universe again. This time we got separated as we ended up in a huge lake and we drifted away from each other.

And you want to know what happened to him? God was rescued from the lake and was even sent to a hospital to heal and be taken care of...again. Granted though from what I've heard he escaped, since we were both adults in this universe this time. As for me...I ended up being washed up in a shitty small town. That worst part was that the small town was in the north so as I got out of the lake, I was cold, dripping wet while also having all of the towns folk look at me as if I was some kind of bad guy.

But you know what, I was a bad guy. I didn't care how they looked at me...they even started to throw rocks while Knight had help. What a way that all of this happened I tell ya. Well, I made it into another cave to get my shit together. I had to find Knight...I just had to...and I recalled as I was following him that he was going to live in the woods near Ponyville.

So I knew when he escaped the hospital he would do just exactly that...so I found the woods called the Everfree Forest and ended up finding him. However, unfortunately for me...I was messing with God as he rose up and levitated and showed off how powerful a God he could be...and powerful he was as I saw a huge light that engulfed God...and I knew from there I was beaten once more.

However, I couldn't just give up there, as I said to myself as he was busy showing how great and powerful he was, “I’ll be back. And when I am back, you will regret that you even created me.” And so I ran off, just in time too as I saw a familiar pony and another pass by and help out God and take him back to their home.

All I could say was that I was pissed off at God. He kept making a fool out of me again and again and again. And you know what the part was that threw me off the edge to the point where I just wanted to give up…after God met those other ponies…he became the personal student of the Princess of Equestria. He was even living the high life as well as he had a personal room in a tower, had the power, and had almost everything going good for him despite me trying to ruin it all for him.

What happened to me after that night wasn’t much. I just walked around until I found a somewhat big town that had its own homeless lying around in the street and begging for money so they don’t starve to death. I was homeless as well, so I just ended up joining them, I even became close to befriending a homeless pony as well, but nothing ever came of it though as I nearly gave up on trying to kill God.
He ruined me, had me on the brink of death, but yet never gave it to me. However I was going to return the favor and this time give him what he never gave me: Death of course. So I waited for the right time to strike back and I did. However I’m sure you know how this story ends…I went to the school where God was at, I tried to kill him, and once more…I was defeated and shunned away from God’s light.

And so from there I just walked and walked and walked. At this point, I was tired, tired of failing time after time. In fact, you could say God had finally broken me. I tried so hard to get revenge on him, but all God did was cast me out of Heaven. All I had thought was back to what God was learning when he was 7 and how Satan was thrown out of Heaven as well. Well, I was like Satan now, except weak and broken.

So I walked and thought it all out one night and decided to just give up all hope and perhaps one day God would forgive me of my sins and I would be let back into Heaven once more. In the meantime, all I could do was sit and wait in my Hell that he had put me in and wait to see if God is generous enough to send me souls that he damned to Hell just like how he did to me. Maybe then I could at least become the devil that I had become and torture all the souls that God did not see fit. Maybe he would send TK my way one day and I would at least have sweet revenge on him.

But as I was walking through some woods, something whispered in my ear to stop thinking about awaiting forgiveness from God himself and instead take action. Then voices started to talk to me in my head. It was soft at first, but then it grew louder and louder telling me to kill kill kill.

I didn’t know what to say other than I wanted the voices to stop, but then a soothing and charming voice that smooth talked me into believing its words. Then it told me that it was a creature from these woods that cannot be seen, but was very real.

In fact it told me it was related to another creature that turned a certain Princes into a monster many years ago, but that creature was weak and this one was strong. This creature would teach me and tell me what to do in order to kill God. All I had to do was prove my loyalty to it by going to a little cabin located in the woods nearby and kill its two occupants.

So I did, I slaughtered both of those ponies and made them suffer a fate worse than anyone could ever give to a living thing. I achieved what the creature had asked of me and then it merged into my soul and it started to control some of my thoughts and memories.

It started to grab a hold of my feelings and twisted it into something quite disturbing. From that point forward… I was no longer playing any childish games with God, but instead was going to bring war to God and his heaven. And so I went back to my home to prepare, but unfortunately for me God’s angel TK was waiting for me at the portal's entrance into the universe that I was stuck in for a few years.

He made me tell him everything and that he was going to go after his precious God to make sure he was safe, but he would be back for me for my punishment.

However after he left, I had killed the demons that he ordered to guard me and to make sure I didn’t escape. I went back home, grabbed everything I needed, and said goodbye to the old place that me and my friends were kept at for over 10 years as I went back to that My Little Pony universe to study God and his every movement. I had to as the voices told me to do so, for if I wanted to break God, I needed to know him inside and out before I can attack.

After a few years of waiting, I finally charged into battle and I hit all the right notes and I was about to declare victory as God would be dead by the end of the war…UNTIL A FUCKING PONY NAMED NEON RUINED EVERYTHING AND COST ME EVERYTHING!!!

That dam pony…if it wasn’t embarrassing enough that I had my ass handed to me by God, I get my plans ruined by a stupid colorful talking pony named Neon Party.

When I studied God from afar, I knew something off with Neon, another angel of God that he appointed. So, after Neon had foiled my plans, I just got sick of it all and went straight after God for a one on one fight.

Again, I had my ass kicked, but not just beaten to a pulp though…oh no this time I was put into stone by God. Sure, the creature was still inside me, but I was locked in my prison and any freedom that I had left in the physical world was gone, but in the mental world, I had some freedom left. However being put into stone is not very fun. You always have to hear whoever is in front of you talking and it’s like being in a prison cell with no way out.

The creature was there however telling me how much I fucked up and that I get one more chance before it leaves me or else it leaves me with an empty shell of who I once was.

Sure, I'll be left with the feelings of hatred, but I'll be left blind as to what I need to do in order to kill God.

And so I was put into stone and put into a far away land and guarded by the toughest dragons of them all. However, I soon gained enough fire in my heart to break free of my stone prison, and after which I killed my Dragon guards with the help of the creature. And then I had my second battle with God, and before I was put into stone, I had said to myself, “This is not over...We will see each other again Knight...the fire has already started burning Equestria....and you and your friends shall be engulfed by the flames...and all shall burn..."

And as I was put away, I kept saying to myself "All shall burn."

And so I waited and waited for the right time to break free. Once I did, the creature inside me helped me teach the dragons who was running what around here...and not even the toughest dragon could bring down. I slaughtered some dragons to show dominance and soon they were bowing down by my feet.

And so I planned my second attack on Knight, a second big plan. And trust me, I was a man of my word as I used the dragons to try and burn Equestria. Many villages and towns burned to ashes, many ran in fear for their lives as they burned to death. I burned all, men, women, even innocent children that were helpless.

There was even one child that wasn't quite dead yet after the dragons attacked a village. It was a little girl and she was trapped under heavy material, so much that I'm sure her legs were broken and she would never be able to walk ever again.

She was in pain, crying out for her parents, part of her face burnt off as well. However I did what a gentlemen would do and ease her pain. I went up to her and said a little poem that I'm sure you are well aware of.

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

It eased her death as I said it. Sure, it was an old poem that God knew as well, but a classic nonetheless from Earth.

However again, my plans were foiled as God and his angels defeated me and the dragons. I knew I was beaten at this point, and the creature inside was about ready to leave too.

So I did the one thing I never did before: act like a coward and escape. I always tried to stay and fight, but if dragons couldn't burn them, then what else would. Sure, I had introduced guns earlier when I started out my plan, it was to get the fire started and let the ponies kill themselves, but clearly it was going to take some time with no guaranteed results.

So I was about to escape and I was close to a cave that would bring me to a slightly safer place...but wouldn't you know it...God had caught me. He had a gun pointing right at my head and he was pissed off to the bone. He wasn't messing around, he wanted to end me, I could look and feel it by staring into his eyes. He had it with me.

Especially after I had burned thousands upon thousands of souls...most innocent souls they were...and I killed them all. And so I awaited my ultimate demise, I was beaten and God was ready to pull the trigger to end me. However, he just stood there and looked at me. Not moving a single muscle, he just stood there looking at me.

I started to question why wasn't he killing me? Why wasn't he making me suffer after all that I have done and put him through. I even did what Satan would do himself and burn and make others suffer. God should have hated my guts...but he just stood there. Then he put down the gun and looked the other way without a single word. And then in that moment I realized he had spared me, forgave me, let me live even though I tried to kill him many times. In that moment, I think I started to understand why the angel TK stood by God's side, God spared my life after everything that I had did wrong.

And so, as I continued to escape, I knew that God deserved a second chance, but the creature left me and only left a hollow shell of my former self, but I still had knowledge and the will to be as bad as I was. I just wasn't too smart in making complex plans in trying to kill God anymore. But so I planned to give God a second chance.

The plan was a set of trials to prove his worth of whether or not I should kill him or not. So one day I made a little trap for him and had him get stuck back on Earth, the Earth where it all started for the both of us. And so from country to country, I set up little tests. I had started him out in Hong Kong and in the dirtiest part of that city, and as he passed some tests but failed others, it all ended in Japan.

With the results from the said test, I had thought he had proved himself worthy of his final challenge: To fight me.

With God, I had rebuilt his childhood home from Earth and made everything exactly how it was for him in his early years, down to the exact details from our memories. And so when he finally came to the house late at night, we were in his childhood bedroom, the room where he created me, and one was going to die and the other leaves the house alive.

And so I had him fight me, and as I knew it, he had beaten me, but once more he was going to let me live, but I wasn't going to stand for that. So I had a tight grip on his arm and put a gun in it pointed at my head and made him pulled the trigger. Before I had him kill me, I had told him he needed to finish what he had started.

And so I was dead...well the body was at least. My soul was still very much alive, but since my soul was stuck in that universe, God of that universe and not my God had judged me and sentenced me to Hell for all of eternity. So I went to Hell and demons were there waiting for me to torture me. When I landed in Hell, it was as nightmarish as you could imagine: The Lake of Fire, people being eaten alive, skin being pulled off, giant monsters and beasts pulling others from limb to limb.

Some suffering fates that they had inflicted on to others. And so the demons, or little creatures to be more precise, they dragged me and forced me into this little area filled with glass cubes. In these glass cubes, they had people suffering their worst nightmares like being gassed and having their skin burn or having other nightmarish ideas being done to them.

And then I saw an empty cube in front of me, it was clearly for me. So they pushed me in and closed it and soon the creatures turned everything into my worst nightmare. They were about ready to start torturing me...but yet they never intimated me. In fact, they were waiting to see me show fear towards them, but I never did.

Instead, I just simply looked at them and soon before you know it, I had killed all of those creatures and escaped the cube. With what I had been through, not even demons scare me. I had to face a devil that was an angel almost every time, so it was nothing new to me. And so I escaped and worked around, no demons and creatures questioned why I was out. Some tried to stop me, but I just ripped their heads off and make them suffer.

However, I had gotten word that God had been to this Hell before and set up a new devil, a complicated story, but an interesting one nonetheless. So I had gotten the bright idea of killing this new devil and gaining the power to be Satan in this hell as that is what TK did for himself at one point.

So I made my way and went through the many circles of hell in order to get to him with God following me somewhat closely without him knowing I was going to kill the new devil that he had put in place not long ago. I was able to make to the Devil's Throne room and killed him. I then took his power and in the nick of time too as God was close. When he had come, he had thought the new devil he had put in place was safe, and then he left. However, I was standing there and let him leave.

I could have killed him, but he had let me live as well, so I simply returned the favor. After that, we have not seen each other since. I'm not sure what God is up to these days anymore, but one thing is for sure, we will meet again one day. And when we do, it will be our final battle together.

More than likely he will have me beat on the battlefield as always, but when he does...he will either destroy my soul and ending me once and for all or...he will lend me a hand and we become friends once more. Whether or not I take it...I'm not sure.

Lawman's Origins (Working Title)
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Lawman's Origins (Working Title)

Author's Note

IMPORTANT PLEASE READ:
Ok, so before anypony reads this, I need to set somethings straight as to why this short story is here.

Ok, for starters, this was unintentional, I didn't mean to write this. It was originally for something else, but I ended up coming up with the idea sort of a backstory to Lawman from Universal Magic when I did write it, which I hadn't previously thought about before until very recently.

So with that being said, Lawman, as of right now isn't a character that hasn't been fully explored yet in Universal Magic. It only has been briefly touched upon, and in all honesty it's going to be a while before I really dive into Lawman so in case you might be confused or something like that...now you know...

Another thing is that this isn't exactly how I want it to go. Like I said, this was originally for something else, and I wrote what I could for it and what you will be reading is what I wrote for that particular thing, but I thought about it and I really would love to expand on this story. I really would like to make it bigger and dive more into the details, but that's going to be a long time before I get a chance to do that because I'm working on other stuff, and I really didn't want this to just be sitting on my hard drive, slowly decaying and forgetting about it. So for now, take this as sort of a Proof of Concept; of what I would like to do in the future.

So asides from that...enjoy...

Lawman's Origins (Working Title)

‘Sometimes life is a bitch. Sometimes in life you just get so tired that you just want to lay down in die in the dirt and sleep forever and let the world take you. But we don’t, we keep on living because god knows why. And sometimes we just keep on going in life even we have no reason to go on. Sometimes we fight to stay alive to ensure that our blood continues to go through the generations. I wonder, did I fight to keep the family alive in the future, or did I just waste my damn time. I can’t tell because that son of bitch in front of me scares me.’

A cowboy was thinking these thoughts as it went through his head as he stood out in the hot sun, looking at his surroundings. Through his eyes, he was at his hometown, a small town somewhere out in the west of the United States where the land was unexplored and dangerous. All he saw was his small little western town located in what seemed to have been in the middle of nowhere in god’s country. And all around him were dead corpses of men and women with no children to be seen around either, lying lifeless on the ground as their bodies decay and being filled with maggots and other such tiny creatures that fed on the dead.

And as the fierce sun beat down against the cowboy’s neck, the dead bodies didn’t get to the cowboy as he was not the one that did it, rather, the one that stood in front of him did it. The man in black as he called him, as he was covered in nothing but shadows and the only thing he can see of this man was his pure, pupil-less eyes, staring back at him. This man in black also seemed off to the cowboy as the man in black was taller than most people and looked menacing every time he looked at him. To the cowboy, the man in black was an odd human being, assuming he was even human to begin with.

The man in black stared at the cowboy while holding what appeared to be a ball of light in his hands. The light illuminated from the sphere, as if it wasn’t a physical object to begin with, but yet the man that was covered in shadows could somehow hold it in his hands. And as the man in black held the ball of light in his hands, he simply took a good look at the cowboy, he noticed he had a black eye patch over his left eye, had a light brown cowboy hat on his head on top of his messy hair style wearing a brown trench coat, and most importantly, the cowboy didn’t look too pleased.

Finally, the man that was covered in shadows broke the silence between the two and said to the cowboy in a deep, but yet somewhat comforting voice, “So I see you made it back alive.”

The cowboy responded with, “You damn right I did. I see you didn’t even bother giving these people a grave.”

The man in shadows responded, “They are not my people; I have no reason to even pick up their bodies and put them in an unorganized pile.”

The cowboy said, “So you have no respect for the dead even?”

The man in shadows said, “No, I do…I do…I just don’t care for those that I have killed.”

The Cowboy then said, “Well…none of that matters now. You just came here three days ago and killed them all like animals…and honestly…I would give a damn. but I’m tired, I’m pissed off…and I just want you to fulfill your end of the deal. So give them back to me…please…”

The man in shadows looked all around him and gave one look at the dead bodies that he had made. To him, he was satisfied with the job that he had done but just like the cowboy, he too was tired and wanted to go back home.

So he looked back at the cowboy and said, “Very well then. Shall we go into the Saloon then and have a drink and talk it over.”

The cowboy, tired and angered, said to the man in black with a tone, “We had a deal damn it!”

The cowboy started to go for his gun but the man in shadows simply raised a finger and moved it from side to side, as he said, “Ah ah ah…who’s the one holding your wife and daughter’s souls here? Besides, I doubt a shot from that thing would even harm me.”

The cowboy then relaxed a little bit and put the thought of going for his gun aside and then simply said to the man in shadows, “Fine…let’s go then.”

The man in shadows then said, “After you”

And so the cowboy then started walking to the left and went into the saloon as the man in shadows followed. When the cowboy walked through, it was all dark and quiet, not even a rodent of some kind was alive within the buildings’ walls, and all that remained was the memories of him whenever he would be drinking in the bar, laughing and smiling and trying to have a good time. But now, everyone was dead and all that was left was the memories of the past.

And so the cowboy walked on the wooden floor and went to the bar and behind the counter, as the man in shadows walked to the bar as well and found himself a decent seat at the counter.

As for the cowboy, he looked at the shelves that was still stocked with liquor of almost all kinds and then asked the man in black, “What do you want, whiskey?”

The man in shadows politely said, “Whatever you wish to serve my friend.”

The cowboy then said “Whiskey it is then.”

The cowboy then grabbed two full bottles of the said drink from the shelf and walked around the counter and sat right next to the man in shadows and gave him his bottle. The cowboy quickly opened his bottle and quickly took a big swig of it down his throat, as if it was like water to him. As for the man in black, he opened it and calmly took a little sip of the liquor, not giving any reaction to the taste of it all.

After the cowboy had his drink, the man in shadows then said to the Cowboy “Well then…let’s talk.”

The cowboy then asked, “What is there to talk about? You killed almost everyone that I knew, and I thought you killed my family, but somehow…god knows how…you have their souls. So I did the things you asked me to do in order to get them back. And now here we are, me trying to get pissed ass drunk here because of the shit you put me through, can you please just hurry this up?”

The man in black said “I would…but I want to hear a story first.”

The cowboy then gave a questionable look towards the man in shadows as he was a bit confused as to what he was trying to ask of him.

However, the man in shadows already could tell of the confusion on the cowboy’s face, so he said to the cowboy, “I want you to start from the beginning…from the very beginning right before you and I crossed paths to this very point where we are at now. I want to hear as much detail as you can give me…and then…I’ll give what you desire.”

The Cowboy then asked, “Why?”

The man in black said, “Oh…nothing really…I just love having a little fun and hearing stories. Speaking of fun…before you tell me the story…would you like to know your future?”

The cowboy was even more confused and asked, “Future?”

The man in black then said, “As you very well know, I’m not from this world of yours, but from another. And from where I come from, I have the ability to tell one’s future. So would you like to have a little fun and know what your future holds?”

The Cowboy then said, “Fine, screw it, why the hell not?”

The man in shadows then waved his hand that was free over the cowboy’s head and then said, “Oh…I see…so that’s what your future holds. Well it appears your future holds for you that you shall meet a man in black, but yet it’s not me, how sad, but yet it’s some kind of costume of some kind. Let’s see, oh..I see that you’ll meet a kid that’ll look somewhat like you, minus the eye patch, and I see death as well.”

The cowboy then went back to drinking his whiskey and started to ignore the man in shadows’ words and said, “I knew you talked bullshit…but that right there…that’s some pure bullshit right there.”

The man in black then said, “Oh, do you not believe my words?”

The cowboy then said, “Your prediction told you that I’m going to die. We’re all going to have to o six feet under at some point. It’s not predicting the future it’s telling me what I already know. And how I’m going to die, I couldn’t give a rat’s ass honestly.”

The man in shadows then looked at his drink and said calmly to the cowboy, “Fine, believe whatever you want. But let’s get to the story. Tell me, how did this all happened, and please, try to fill in as many details as possible…that’s what makes telling stories so much fun.”

The Cowboy then stared into space and then said, “Fine. Well…let’s see, where do I begin? Well, it all started this past Friday; it was the start of a special weekend as the fourth of July was coming up. Me and my family were going to celebrate America and for all its given us and shit. We were all happy together, almost like we couldn’t be separated, especially my daughter, oh she loved me so much that day all because I gave her a little stuffed toy. I can see that smile on her face like it was a few hours ago. Then I got word that a bounty of someone that I was looking for was held up in some cave near the mountains. So I figured I go out and get the man, tie him up, bring him back into town, and collect the bounty and have a nice little pay day for me and the family during the fourth of July.

‘So I got on my horse and rode to that cave, and that cave looked odd to me...you know; like something was bad about it, like I shouldn’t even have gone in there. Clearly I should have listened to my gut then, but…still, I went in regardless. I brought in a lantern along with my gun in my other hand and went in, ready to get my payday. Sadly, no bounty, just a really weird light coming off from deep within the cave. I had thought the man I was looking for was trying to hide in there, so I went forward, but I didn’t see a human being.

‘Oh no…just a weird thing on the cave wall...a portal I think…and then you stepped out. I thought when I saw you that I was just seeing things…but…I wasn’t. I honestly didn’t know what was happening. I didn’t even know what to think, it all happened so fast. But next thing you know, you were pissed and claimed that I went into your home and released your so called ‘pets’ and that you were pissed off. And according to you, the consequence of my actions was that you were going to take away something from me…so you took the town that I lived in and everyone that I knew. You killed everyone and even ate their souls for god’s sake.

‘For a moment, I had thought I found a doorway to hell and I unleashed some kind of demon…but right before you got to my wife and daughter, you finally figured out that I had no idea what the hell you were talking about. Then you explained that you were from another world, or at least you said, another universe, whatever that means. And then you explained something mumbo jumbo and shit like that to me.”

The man in shadows stopped him and said “It wasn’t shit what I had said to you, What I explained was that there are many universes and of many kinds too. And what you simply saw in that cave was a portal to the outside of the universe my friend, to where it’s a hub where all the other universes connect and where one can go through a portal as they wish.”

The cowboy looked a bit irritated as he was being annoyed by the man in black’s words and he said with a tone in his voice, “look, I don’t give a crap where you came from. Let me finish the damn story so I can get my family back…ok?”

The man in shadows then said “Alright then, I shall not interrupt you again. My apologies.”

The cowboy then continued to say, “Good. So after you said whatever you said to me, you offered me a deal. You took the souls of my wife and daughter and pretty much held it hostage, for in exchange that I go out and find your lost ‘pets.’ Or at the very least kill them because according to you, their ‘souls’ would find their way back. So I went out into the wild, all by my lonesome self, trying to hunt down these animals that belonged to you. I traveled trough harsh snow, murky swamps, gangs that I had to kill that were going after the same animal, and spent many nights under the stars. And it was a bitch to get those ‘pets’ of yours.

‘And let me tell you, they looked like they belonged to the devil himself, One was like a dog, but yet wasn’t a dog. Instead it looked more like a deformed beast from hell itself. Anyways, I went and killed them all like you asked, and almost got myself killed in the process. That’s why I have an eye patch because of them screwed it up bad. I was just lucky I found a doctor in time to fix it. But, I spent all weekend long trying to kill the pets, and I did what you asked. Then I came walking back here, seeing you still there next to the dead bodies and here we are now. The end. So on this fourth of July, I ask you to let my family go so we can live in peace…please. I just want my family back…I miss them…and I’m tired. So just give them back, before I have to put a bullet in you myself.”

The man in black then gave a slight chuckle to the cowboy’s remarks and said,
“Hm…like you would know what to do if you killed me. But enough of this talk now. As I promised…I shall give you what you asked for, two souls, untouched, pure and innocent souls. Souls that…unfortunately, I cannot return to you.”

The cowboy then started to feel a sense of rage building up inside of him.

His eyes started to become wide and he slammed his fists hard as he could down on the counter top and quickly turned his head to the man in shadows and stared directly into his eyes and said as loud as he could, “WHAT!?”

The man in black simply and calmly said, “I would have thought you would have figured it out by now. You looked smart, but perhaps you’re just another imbecile. I have your wife and daughter’s soul, but yet it is not in a body, or at least a body that you would be familiar with. The bodies that you know are long gone and have been decaying for the past few days my friend. In fact, at this point, nothing can bring your wife and daughter back now. The only options are, I can take them and do whatever I please with them, let them free and who knows what will happen to these fine souls, or…I can do something ‘special’ do them. Something I can do to make up for the poor deal that we’ve made.”

However, the cowboy didn’t hear a single word come out from the man in shadows. All he could do was concentrate on the fire from within him, burning and pushing him to take action for what he had lost. And so, without hesitation, the cowboy threw the hardest punch he could to the man in black’s face, while quickly standing up and to get into a fighting position. However, this did nothing to effect the outcome he so desired, but instead only aggravated the man in shadow as he didn’t even flinch when the cowboy hit him, but only made him a bit mad on the inside.

The man in shadow said, “I’m afraid your punches are too weak to have any effect on me. However, I can show what I can do.”

And so, the man in black made a big fist with his free hand and gave a hard uppercut to the cowboy’s chin, which sent him flying back a few feet across the saloon and a bruise to show for it as well. However, the cowboy was tough as he still remained conscious on the hard, wooden floor beneath him, and him being punched only made him more angry on the inside. However, he wasn’t an idiot so claimed by the man in shadows. So the cowboy, as quickly as he could tried to go for his revolver.

As he was trying to get himself together, the man in black simply started walking towards the cowboy slowly and he said, “So, since you rudely interrupted me, let’s try this again and…” he was cut off by a loud gunshot, as the cowboy had went for his gun as quickly as he could and pulled the trigger, lodging a bullet into the man in shadows.

After the man in shadows quickly figured out what happened he stopped in his tracks, looked down, and saw a very dark shade of red coming out from his body and he simply gave a look of a surprised face, but yet not too surprised at the same time.

The man in black said, “I didn’t think your so called guns would hurt me, seems that I was wrong.”

And so the man in shadows fell to the ground, but still had some breath in him. The cowboy then got himself together as best he could and walked over to the man in black with a disgruntled face and grabbed him by the chest, as if he was wearing cloths. When the cowboy touched the man in shadows, it felt weird to his fingers, as it didn’t feel like anything he had felt before yet it felt like it was normal and not at all alien to him what he felt like.

However, the cowboy brushed those thoughts aside and looked deep into the eyes of the man in shadows and said to him, “GIVE THEM BACK! GIVE THEM BACK DAMN IT!”

The man in black said, as best he could as he started to sound like he was starting to fade away, “Oh stop being so immature. I told you the truth my friend and I’ve been nothing but honest with you. I was even planning on giving your wife and daughter back in one form or another. Just not how you would remember them. But after what you’ve done here…you’ve only disappointed me. And you can trust what I say here now, I may ‘die’ here, but my soul will return back home. And there I will come back, and when you least expect it, I will be back and you will surely regret what you’ve done here today. And it’s not because you ‘killed’ me here today, but because you annoyed me to go through the process of reincarnation. But don’t worry, you still did a job well done and it shall not go unpaid. So I’m going to give you what you desire, your family, your love, your life back.

” And so the man in shadows raised up his hands with the ball of light in it, and raised it high in the air as much as he could, and as the cowboy saw the ball of light, he could feel a sense of hope within himself that things might just be alright in the end for him. All of a sudden, the ball of light disappeared and crumbled up into dust.

The cowboy was shocked on the inside by this, but then he was startled a bit as the dust looked like it was floating as it filled the air around him. The cowboy got up on his two feet and started to take a few steps back, but the dust followed him and soon it covered all of his skin; he could even see the dust go through his cloths and go on his skin underneath, as he stood there, with a mouth agape.

The cowboy then asked, “What did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO!?”

The cowboy stared at the man in black, waiting for his answer. However, the man in shadows just simply stared back and said, “I gave what you desired, your wife and daughter back. However, I did something ‘special’ to their souls. They may not be able to come back to life, but their souls can be destroyed and forever living within your soul, so their remnants will never leave you. And the dust, well, it’s like having their ‘ashes’ permanently attached to your skin, forever reminding you that their souls shall forever be with you…for all of eternity.”

The cowboy was confused by the last word and he asked, “What do you mean by that?”

The man in black said, “Oh, but that’s the ‘special’ part though. Since their souls are forever within you, and as you wear their ‘ashes’ on your skin, you also get their life expectancy as well, although I added a little something to their souls while you were gone, so that you will live forever. It doesn’t mean you’ll be invincible, it’ll just mean you won’t age passed today is all, and as you carry their dead souls in your heart, you’ll always look the way that you do just like the last time that you saw them.”

The cowboy then looked back down to his arms and simply tried to see the ‘ashes’ on his skin, but it was as if the ‘ashes’ were invisible and it simply blended into his skin. But yet, he could feel deep down his family’s dead souls were within him, that he was wearing them.

Then the man in shadows spoke up one last time and said, “Don’t worry my dear friend. I’ll be generous today and give you a parting gift…till we meet again that is. I shall give you a better gift than immortality; I shall take away that sadness that I can that fills your heart with sorrow. I shall take the pain of loss away from you. And you must be wondering to yourself…how? Well, this is what happens back in my world when my body dies.”

And then the cowboy got a little bit curious as to what the man in black had meant by those words, but soon before he knew it the man in shadows disappeared, by exploding. It was not a big explosion, but a minor that had a little force that sent the cowboy back further into the saloon, as well as some tables and chairs that followed the cowboy as well.

And the cowboy was unconscious for a few hours as the body of the man in shadows left no trace after it had left. And by the time nightfall came, the cowboy came back to a conscious state, but sadly to him, he did not remember what happened. He did not remember his wife, his daughter, or the dead people outside the saloon.

All he remembered was that he was a cowboy, and he was at his home, forever sitting at the saloon, trying to figure out what he should do for many years to come.

The Universal Halloween Spook-Tacular Magic Special
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

The Universal Halloween Spook-Tacular Magic Special

Character Commentary Coming Soon! Maybe...

The Universal Halloween Spook-tacular Magic Special

Well this is odd…I thought I would have known sooner after all these years, but it turns out I was oblivious to it. Pretty much saying, there is no Nightmare Night here. Instead it’s just called Halloween. Why no Nightmare Night in this universe, I don’t know.

Anyways, let’s begin what happened as I write this down in my journal…I’m lonely aren’t I? Well, where should I begin…yes…I know. What happened last week, it was Halloween night and the trick or treating was about to begin. I was in my home in Stalia, and Wolf and I were getting our costumes on and I was in the living room.

I was going as a cowboy…cowpony...whatever…because it was the easiest thing to put on and I was too lazy to do anything else. All I did was take off my satchel and kept my black cowboy hat on and I put on some other gear like a gun holster and a vest and shit.

You know…to make it look like a cowboy...cowpony, whatever. I was standing in front of a mirror, trying to make sure I was looking alright. Then Wolf came walking by in his costume which was supposed to be a ghost of some kind. Instead it looked like he was part of the KKK. He had two holes cut out for his eyes and a little pointy thing at the top.

When he came walking by, he said to me, “Hey Knight, why are we going out on Halloween night?”

I then said while I was still looking in the mirror, “We’re going trick or treating, that’s why. If you don’t want to go, that’s fine, just please make sure to not fuck up the place.”

Wolf then said, “Yeah, I know that, and I’m coming along in case you see some sweet mare ass. But…don’t you think you guys are a bit…you know…old to go out and begging for candy from old ponies?”

I then turned around and gave him a tired look, that tired look that if you were to see my eyes, you know that I wasn’t in the mood.

I said to Wolf while staring at his ghost costume that looked like the KKK, “I know wolf...and honestly ever since we got to Stalia…I just don’t care anymore. I just…I just don’t care anymore. So now we’re just going to roll with whatever happens. And right now the others want to go trick or treating for some reason.”

Wolf then asked me, “Yeah, but why though?”

I then said to Wolf as I went back looking in the mirror, “God only knows Wolf. God only knows. Hey, you think I look alright in this cowboy outfit?”

Wolf then squinted his eyes for a bit and took a good long look at me, but he then said to me, “Yeah...but you’re missing something. What are you missing…OH YEAH! YOU NEED YOUR HAT!”

I then looked at my hat and I then had wide eyes and had felt stupid because Wolf pointed out the obvious.

I then said out loud as I used my magic to remove my black cowboy hat, “Oh yeah. Thanks for pointing that out.”

I then replaced my black cowboy hat with a brown cowboy hat that came with the costume that I got from the costume store…and when I mean costume store I mean from a crack dealer. He was selling it for twenty bits less than the store; he had a good deal alright. No one can resist his deals.

But anyways, I then turned around with a confident smile on my face and I then asked Wolf one more time, “So...how does it look now?”

Wolf then said, assumingly with a smile under his costume, “Perfect!”

I then said to Wolf, “Great! Now while we’re gone, make sure to put the bowl of candy out.”

Wolf then started walking to the kitchen and as he was doing so, I asked him, “Say Wolf, I noticed a lot of empty candy wrappers are in the garbage can…you didn’t do anything to the candy, did you?”

Wolf then said to me, “No.”

He said it quickly to so it was sort of like…he was guilty of it but yet at the same time maybe he was just on crack that he got from the crack dealer that sold me the costume, but you never know though.

I then said to Wolf, “Are you sure about that Wolf?”

Wolf then said to me, “I told you No! God…get off my back already you cowboy wearing faggot.”

I then gave a slight sigh and then said to Wolf “Look, I just want to make sure you didn’t put anything in the candy that will fuck up the kids. Because the last thing I need right now is dead kid’s ghost haunting me tonight.”

Wolf then finally said to me, “Look, everything is going to be fine and there’s nothing in the candy at all.”

Wolf then said under his breath and I didn’t notice at the time, “except for the razor blades that I put in the candy to fuck with the kids…”

I then at the time heard Wolf say something, but I was unsure of that and I then asked Wolf, “You said something Wolf?”

Wolf then quickly and urgently said to me, “I said nothing…I SAID NOTHING DAMN IT…GET THE FUCK OFF MY BACK!!!”

Wolf had thrown shit off the kitchen counter like the toaster and shit as he said those last words and yelled it at me.

He then calmed down quickly and he then said to me, “I’m going upstairs for a while...”

I then rolled my eyes and I said to him, “Whatever.”

Wolf then proceeded to go upstairs as I stood by the door waiting for my friends to come on by to go Trick or Treating.

As Wolf went up the stairs and doing…something...he yelled from all the way upstairs, “HEY KNIGHT!? HOW COME TK ISN’T COMING WITH US!? HE WOULD BE PERFECT TO SCARE THE KIDS!”

I then yelled out loud to Wolf, “I told you before Wolf! This is our Halloween Special and if we bring him into it, then we’re going to go on a complicated and complex adventure that would more than likely involve demons and going through the seven levels of hell or something! So for the sake of this special, we just lied to him and said that we were going to be busy getting high all day! And he then gave a grunt and I’m pretty sure he thinks we’re retarded! In fact I’m pretty sure he always seen us as retarded! Anyways what the fuck are you doing up there! We’ve got to get this Halloween Special underway so we can get it over with!”

Wolf then said as I heard a lot of noises coming up there…and some of those noises were seal noises as well, “I WON’T BE LONG…JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE GOD DAMN IT!”

Then from what seemed like out of nowhere, the doorbell ringed.

I then turned around quickly and said under my breath, “Well it’s show time I guess.”

I then put on a little smile on my face and I then opened the door and was greeted to see all of my ‘friends’ in front of the door and in their costumes while holding a small bag for candy. However, it was a bit weird. Something about their costumes, didn’t feel right when you looked at them for the first time. Neon looked like he was in a poorly made zombie costume. Mac was barely in anything.

Forrest…well who the fuck cares about Forest. He’s a loser, a shmuck, a faggot. He’s a maroon…no one gives a flying fuck about Forest. Although we do thank him for being our personal punching bag, he has a heart of gold don’t you know. Anyways, Arrell’s was a bit off and Jack…well let me tell you, I couldn’t tell JACK of what he was wearing…get it…his name is Classy Jack and his costume was Jack anything…you could...could barely tell anything…SHUT UP…I know…it was terrible…Wolf reminds me of it every day and shit.

Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, the costumes. Well I looked at the guys with still a smile on my face and asked them, “So your guys’ costumes…look…dandy?”

Neon then said out loud as he flared his arms up and sort of went crossed eyed, “Thanks! I made it myself!”

I then took a closer look at Neon’s costume and thought it would be slightly polite of me to ask him about his costume…well that and I was a bit curious about it too, you know...it looked off to me.

So I asked Neon, “So Neon…are you supposed to be a zombie or something or…”

Neon then cut me off and then said to me out loud, “I’m Mr. Twinkle from three blocks down! I knocked on his door and when he opened it, I kept him quiet by singing him a lullaby with my knife! And then I skinned him alive! Neat costume idea…huh Knight!?”

So basically saying, it all started to become clear to me that it wasn’t a costume that Neon was wearing, it was the skin of one of local ponies in town. And I started to realize all the blood that was dripping from Neon’s ‘costume’ and it looked like he poorly put the costume on. At this point I’m not even shocked anymore, I’ve become desynthesized to Neon’s ways so this isn’t new…although it still makes me question why Neon does what he does, but…the world may never know...you know?

Anyways, after Neon pretty much yelled as loud as he could it felt like, Mac butted in and said to everyone, “Pfft, you call that a costume Neon? Now this costume is a costume! If it wasn’t for me telling it to you guys, you wouldn’t able to tell it was me.”

We then all stared at Macs costume and it wasn’t much to look at it. All it was basically was a bunch of paper taped to his body with the word “APPLE” written on it. From the top of his head to his hooves, it was just a blank piece of paper that was white with the word “APPLE” written on it…that’s it.

So obviously we looked at him funny, well except for Neon that is…he stared crossed-eye into the distance somewhere, probably into the 5th dimension or something. And Mac, he had his eyes closed with a huge smile on his face, as if he had a great deal of confidence within him about his costume.

Then he opened his left eye and then noticed that we were all staring at him and he then started to be a bit confused and asked as he fully opened his eyes, “What? Are you guys confused or something? IS APPLEJACK NEAR! I’LL KILL THAT BITCH!”

Arrell then pointed out to Mac, “No it’s your costume. How do we say this to you? It fucking sucks.”

I then said to Mac, “Yeah, it looks like it sucks the Chrome off of a 57’ Chevy Bumper.”

Mac then started to get a bit annoyed as his expression on his face turned from confident to sour and he then said to us all, “Well your costumes sucks too!”

Jack then said, “No it doesn’t. Yours does. You faggot.”

Mac couldn’t help but have an even more annoyed face as his mouth showed it by almost saying the word ‘fuck.’

But Mac then oddly enough cooled down and he then had a weird grin on his face and he then gave a little chuckle and said in his usual southern accent, “Well, you may be thinking that now. But just you wait until later tonight and I’ll show you what this bad boy of a costume can do. You’ll want to take those words back into yours mouths.”

And then there was few seconds of silence until Jack said to Mac, “Yeah…well you’re still a faggot.”

Mac looked more annoyed with Jack saying that to him, but he didn’t say another word.

Mostly because Forest then spoke up with a smile and said, “Yeah, well I’m going as a Vampire! Like my costume?”

We then all looked at Forrest and stared at him in silence for a few seconds and then Jack spoke up and said to Mac, “I take that back. Forrest, you’re the faggot now. Faggot.”

Forrest then had his smile turn to a disappointing frown and said to us, “Come on guys, it isn’t that bad. I know the stitching might be a bit off and the colors are a bit off and…oh…right.”

I then said to Forrest to comfort him, “Look, Forrest, if it’s worth anything to you, I think your costume actually looks alright and it doesn’t make you look like a faggot.”

Forrest then looked at me and gave a small smile, as if he had hope once more…but then I took that hope and crushed it and said to him after a few seconds of silence, “But it does make you look gay though. And I’m not talking about the homosexual kind either…”

Forest then just looked down towards the ground in silence, hanging his head in pure and utter shame. But to be fair he is the punching bag so…he deserved it. If I could right now…I would spit on him.

But anyways, I then looked at Arrell’s costume and told him, “But Arrell’s costume here…it doesn’t make him look gay. It makes him look like…a pervert of some kind…that wants to breed with animals…I think…or is it some kind of sex thing?”

Arrell’s costume was basically a werewolf costume. His whole entire body was covered up except for a big hole in the mouth area for him to poke his face out. It was…kind of weird…like a furry thing or something. Who knows…maybe Arrell was a furry. And maybe being a furry was a thing in this universe, considering Nightmare Night is called Halloween here.

Oh well though, Arrell responded to my comment with, “Look, this is my costume for Halloween. I know it looks a little bit off to you guys, but just so you know…I only rape my bunnies when I experiment on them three times a year…wait..I take that back…four times a year. Except for Asshat…mostly because lately he’s been naughty lately…and I don’t mean the arousal kind either. So I had to punish him BECAUSE THAT LITTLE SON OF A WHITE BITCH CAN KISS MY FUCKING ASS IF HE THINKS MY EATING PUDDING IS A GOOD IDEA! Sorry…just...needed to get that out. Sometimes my animals…need to be punished…if you know what I mean”

I then said to Arrell, “We get it Arrell; you do weird things to animals. It’s not a secret alright.”

Arrell then asked me, “Yeah…well have you been in my shed?”

I then thought about it for a quick second and then said to Arrell with a bit of hesitation in my voice, “Uhhh…no?”

Arrell then said to me with a suspicious look in his eyes that looked like he was pissed, “Good…because if I find you or anyone else here sneaking into my shed…I’M GOING TO probably give you a slap across the face…stay the fuck out of my shed.”

Jack then said , “Well I don’t know about you guys, but as you can clearly see, I am ready to go out for some good ol’ fashioned trick or treating tonight. So how about we move this show on the road…huh? The night is not going to last forever you know…and I want to “hit” as many houses as possible, if you know what I mean.”

We all looked at Jack’s costume and he pretty much looked like a greaser from the 1950’s. He had a black leather jacket on, with a white shirt underneath. He also had a pair of sunglasses, the kind that you can see your reflection in as well as having his black mane pulled backwards so it makes it look slick. Pretty much saying it looked like he put hair gel in his mane. And of course in his hooves he was carrying a lead pipe.

It was an odd costume to say the least and certainly an odd choice to choose for Halloween but I had to ask Jack, “Why that costume there Classy Jack?”

Jack then told me, “I’m sure you know the answer by now Knight. So can we get moving? I want to go and start smashing some heads in…pumpkin heads…I want to start smashing some pumpkin heads.”

Jack then looked around and looked like he was double checking his surroundings and he then said, “Ok I want to smash some skulls in…of course you know...if they don’t give us any treats that is.”

I then rolled my eyes and pretty much figured that’s how jack was going to be. He was the asshole after all.

So I then turned my head and yelled as loud as I could towards the upstairs, “HEY WOLF! GET YOUR FUCKING ASS DOWN EHRE, WE’RE ABOUT TO GO!”

Wolf then yelled back towards me, “HOLD ON, I’M COMING! JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE!”

I then yelled back at Wolf, “YOU DON’T HAVE A DAMN FUCKING MINUTE! THE GUYS ARE HERE AND IT’S TIME TO GO FUCKING TRICK OR TREATING YOU SON OF A BITCH!”

Arrell then put his hoof on my shoulder and I looked down, caught a bit off guard by it and he said to me with a calm tone, “Let me handle this Knight. I’m great with animals and I think I can convince him to come down.”

I then took a slight step to the right and said, “Suit yourself.”

Arrell, with a big smile then took two steps forward into my home and pointed his head towards the stairs and he then said to Wolf with a kind and sweet voice like Fluttershy, “GET YOUR FUCKING WOODEN ASS DOWN RIGHT NOW BEFORE I COME UP THEIR AND KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS!”

Wolf then yelled back, “OH YOU WANT TO SPEAK THAT WAY TO ME ARRELL!? IS THAT HOW YOU’RE GOING TO TALK TO ME!? BECAUSE WE CAN GO BRO! WE CAN GO RIGHT WHEN I’M FINISHED!”

Arrell then said sweetly, “OH I’LL KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS WHEN YOU GET DOWN HERE! I’L KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS OUTSIDE WHERE EVERYPONY ELSE CAN FUCKING SEE! AND WHEN THEY SEE ME KICKING YOUR FUCKING ASS, THEY’RE GOING TO BE THINKING YOU’RE SOME KIND OF PUSSY WHIPPED WOODEN BITCH THAT CAN’T KEEP HIS DICK ON STRAIGHT!”

Wolf then yelled back, “NOT IF I KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS BITCH! I’LL MAKE SURE ALL YOUR ANIMAL FRIENDS WATCH TOO AND SHOW THEM THAT I’M THE DOMINATE ONE AND I’LL MAKE YOU MY FUCKING BITCH! I’LL SHOW THEM THAT I’M TOP DOG, THAT I’M THE MOTHER FUCKING ALPHA AND THAT YOU’LL BE IN THE LOWEST RANKING IN THE PACK… GOT THAT YOU TWO TIMING PIECE OF SHIT!?”

Arrell then kindly said with a gentle voice, “OH I KNOW YOU DIDN’T JUST SAY THAT TO ME! I’M COMING UP THERE RIGHT NOW! SO GET FUCKING READY FOR ME TO RIP YOU A NEW FUCKING ASSHOLE RIGHT NOW! BECAUSE WHEN I’M DONE WITH YOU, YOU’RE GOING TO BE BURNING ALIVE MOTHER FUCKER! I’LL BE USING YOU AS FIREWOOD BY CHRISTMAS TIME FOR MY FUCKING FIREPLACE!”

Wolf then yelled back towards Arrell, “OH YOU JUST TRY ME YOU MOTHER FUCKER! JUST TRY ME RIGHT FUCKING NOW! I DARE YOU! I FUCKING DOUBLE DOG DARE YOU PIECE OF PONY GARBAGE!”

Arrell then said in a gentle tone while putting on his angry face, “THAT’S IT! I’M COMING UP TO KICK YOUR ASS!”

And so Arrell went straight ahead and charged up the steps as quick as a bunny! His hooves stomped on the stairs as you could hear him step on the second floor…and then nothing. There was only silence for a few seconds. And after a few seconds had gone by, Arrell then calmly walked down the steps with a neutral look on his face.

That kind of face that said that he was kind of confused. That kind of confusion as to where do babies come from…and then you find out where they come from and become horrified. Your parents always told you that you came from the mayo jar…but once the truth is revealed…you’re left shocked and appalled.

You don’t even know what’s real anymore. So all you can do as a kid…is grab the rope…put it around your neck…tie it up on the ceiling fan in your room…and pretend that you’re superman…yeah…that kind of confusion.

Well once Arrell came down the steps calmly, he then walked towards us, but specifically looked at me in my eyes and he then calmly asked me in a relaxed state, “Does...Wolf always do that up there?”

I then said to Arrell, “I try not to think about it and let him do his thing.”

Arrell then said back to me, “Huh…well I thought I was the fucked up one when it came to animals…but what I saw up there…you know let just pretend that I didn’t see what I saw.”

I then said to Arrell, “I’ll loan you some weed later so after you smoke it, you’ll just think you saw it when you were high.”

Then all of a sudden, we heard footsteps…paw steps…whatever…came from the stairs and Wolf came down the stairs and I feel like he had a smile under that ghost like costume.

He then said in a happy tone, “Alright, I’m all done…I’m ready to go. Let me just get the bowl of candy for the kiddies to take and probably cut their mouths after finding razor blades in it and we can go.”

Arrell then just stared at Wolf for a few seconds and Wolf pretty much knew why and Wolf just said to Arrell, “You know what you saw up there.”

Arrell then said to Wolf, “I want to keep you in my shed.”

Wolf then said, “Get in line then, well let’s go then and stalk some kids shall we?”

And so Wolf went ahead and got the bowl of candy and put it near the front door and we were on our way to trick or treating for the night. And when we went out, it was a busy Halloween night.

It seemed like everypony was out…well...kids that was. For the adults, they were still in costumes. The mares wore mostly the sexy version of most costumes, like sexy clown, sexy nurse, sexy witch, sexy blender, sexy sandwich, sexy table, sexy rock, sexy ghost, sexy pancake, sexy water, sexy water glass, sexy wine glass, sexy candy bar, sexy chicken, sexy scootaloo, sexy bleach, you get the idea.

Most of the mares were dressed up like that anyways. I would say maybe ninety two percent of the mares in Stalia were dressed up like that. The remaining eight percent dressed up as something non-sexy…like going as themselves, or a witch. That was about it…although one had crabs. I’ll leave that up to you and your imagination what that means…because it’s better that way. But anyways, what about the Stallions? Well they either dressed up as something spooky like a zebra or a monster…or they were just pissed as drunk while taking their kids trick or treating…and then they would beat their kids if they go against what the father says.

Yup…right there in public…to be honest it wasn’t an issue, if anything it was more or less a show for everyone else. But aside from that, the only odd thing to note is that strangely, no Halloween party for the adults to attend and knock each other up. None of that, just no parties whatsoever. I mean, come on…if it’s Halloween, you have to have a party.

I would have done it…but then I realize how stupid that would be because of what odd and weird things that might occur that would inevitably make it into a long and eventful night. So it was a better bet to go out trick or treating with the guys…even if we were the only ones above the age of 9 out and about, begging for candy from strangers. But as we were walking, the stars were out, yeah, got to mention those stars; and there was a bit of wind blowing through the air to set the mood with pumpkins out and all carved up and shit.

There would also be a candle inside the pumpkin to give off that glowing effect of the pumpkin being alive or some shit. As for anything else…well I mean there were decorations and shit throughout the doors. But they looked like utter shit so, not much to say there. So other than that, we were looking around, trying to see which target we would hit first.

Since I was the group leader most of the time it seemed, it would have been me, but since I couldn’t give two shits and a fuck, Arrell was the leader and it was his job to search for a place to ask for candy from strangers and hope to god that there isn’t any razor blades in it. But as we were walking and Arrell was searching around the town, I had to ask Mac something.

So I went up next to him as we were walking, “Hey Mac, can I ask you something?”

Mac then responded with a smile on his face, “Why of course Knight. You know you can ask me anything…as long as it’s the right thing.”

I then looked Mac right in the eyes and asked him, “Why are you guys trick or treating when you’re grown stallions?”

Mac then stretched his left forearm and put it around my neck and gently patted my shoulder, while smiling and having his eyes closed.

He then said to me, “Oh Knight…there’s a lot of things you will never understand in this world. You see Knight…the reason why we go out and trick or treat is...”

Mac then cut himself off and paused for a moment, as he opened his eyes and it looked like he was trying to come up with an answer.

Mac continued to say as he rolled his eyes up towards his forehead and gave me a confused look as I just stood there, raising one of my eye brows up, “Uhh…we go out to trick or treat because…”

Mac then cut himself off once again and looked towards Jack and asked him, “Hey Jack, why do we go out every Halloween and trick or Treat?”

Jack turned his head and looked like he wasn’t in the mood to answer the question.

Jack then said to Mac, “How the fuck should I know. I used to go out and just trick people…but then Arrell talked to me and asked me to join with him. Ask him while I plan the first trick of the night.”

Jack then went back to minding his own business and thinking about where to drive that iron pipe to as Mac then turned his head towards Arrell, who was still looking and squinting his eyes to see if there were any good houses or cottages nearby to go to.

Mac then asked Arrell, “Hey Arrell, why do we go out Trick or Treating exactly?”

Arrell then said as he kept looking for a house to visit, “I don’t know. I think it was Neon’s idea.”

Me and Mac then turned our heads to Neon, who he had his back towards us and looked like he wasn’t paying attention to us either. However, once we looked towards his direction, we didn’t have to say a single word towards him as he just simply turned his head a full one hundred and eighty degree, all with the addition of crackling sounds of bones breaking as Neon slowly turning his head towards us with a big ol’ smile across his face. Once Neon turned his head, Me and Mac had those wide eyes that pretty much said we were kind of spooked but at the same time it was just weird.

So once Neon turned his head, he then said to us, “Yes?”

Mac then said while keeping with the wide eyes me and him, “Uhh…why do we…”

Neon cut Mac off and said out loud as he turned his head up wards towards the sky, “It was Forrest’s idea!”

Neon then proceeded to turn his head back down to a normal eye level and turned his head another one hundred and eighty degrees…basically back to its normal position. And then me and Mac both looked at Forrest, who was starring at us with an embarrassing look on his face. It was that kind of look that pretty much said he did something terrible, but at the sometime he’s shy about it…like killing an Asian guy.

Yeah…it’s terrible…but at the same time it’s not that terrible…just embarrassing. Do you know how many math questions could have been answered with that one Asian? Like…fifty or something. Well anyways, we looked at Forrest as he kind of had a bit of redness on his face, he looked like he was down in the dumps, and had his head hanging down low to the ground and trying to cover his face at the same time with his hooves.

Although…he didn’t do a good job to say the least. But aside from that, you get the idea he wasn’t the most confident pony at that moment amongst us.

Well me and Mac both looked at him with both our wide eyes, but soon those wide eyes went away went back to our normal eye position and Mac just asked Forrest, “Forrest…you started this tradition?”

Forrest then was quiet for a few seconds, but he then mustered up the strength to tell us, “Yeah…I kind of started this.”

I then said as Mac still had his arm around me and me trying to gently push his arm away from me…because I don’t swing that way, “Honestly, it makes sense. Like we said Forrest, you’re a faggot. Maybe not that kind of a faggot…but the other kind. So no surprise here.”

Forest then raised up one of his hooves in the air and had a bit of a worried look on his face and then asked us, “Yeah…but aren’t you going to ask why I started this though?”

Mac then calmly and respectively said, “No.”

Forrest then asked us, “Yeah, but don’t you guys want to know what happened at least? Knight? What about you? This is your first time with us?”

Arrell then stepped in while still talking, “Forrest, even we didn’t know why you did this.”

Jack then said, “Yeah Forrest, no one gives a fuck about the back story. Or about you in general.”

Neon then slide in as smooth as jazz and said with a weird smile on his face, “I’d like to know.”

Forrest had a little smile on his face when he heard that from Neon and seemed glad he had asked that while the rest of us groaned in resistance to it without saying another word towards Forrest because it only meant it was flashback time.

So uhh…pretend we’re going into a time vortex… do do do do do do do do do do do do…

A LOT OF YEARS EARLIER…

So to start off with Forrest’s flashback, Forrest was saying to us, “Well the reason why we’re going out trick or treating is because of what happened to me as a colt. It was many moons ago where my parents just got divorced, my mom got custody of me, and my dad just killed her and took custody of me instead. And so I was living with him in his broken home in the trailer park clouds with a broken family of brothers and sister that may or may not have been related to me at all whatsoever. In fact, I’m pretty sure my dad abducted those children, but my memory’s a bit fuzzy on that one. Well, it was Halloween night and I was in the living room with my dad.”

And so the flashback began for us…yeah…don’t ask why or how we saw a flashback…it just kind of happens in this universe. Well anyways, the flashback started and we were taken back several years prior. We saw that Forrest was a small colt, and he was in a dark living room with only a lamp to drive away the darkness.

And there was a recliner as well and that’s where we assumed Forrest’s dad was there and he was a big ol’ fat stallion sitting in it and he was hairy as fuck…hairier than most stallions. We didn’t get to see his face or anything, just one of his forearms…or legs…we weren’t sure, more than likely his arm though. And the stallion was reclined and the stallion at least we can tell, was lazy. There was also an empty bottle of cloud beer right next to him as well. And the whole place was a mess as well.

There was trash everywhere. The walls were dirty; the wallpapers were torn and had grease stains all over them. There were holes in the walls of the trailers, and there even bugs like cockroaches and flies coming out from the holes as well. The roof of the trailer looked like it was going to cave in at some point and the whole building just looked like it was poorly made and wouldn’t be able to stand up for much longer. It was also night time as we also saw a window as well. All the while, there was a record player near the lamp that was playing a song that was eerily familiar to Chicago’s If You Leave Me Now song.

Well, anyways, the little Forrest was happy and having a big smile across his face and looked perfectly normal to us at least, nothing wrong with him or didn’t look poor. He was just a tiny version of Forrest, with the wings and everything.

And so we then saw Forrest speaking to his dad and say, “Dad, can I go out with my friends and go trick or treating tonight? I’ve got my costume ready and everything. I’m going as Princess Celestia because she’s cool.”

Forrest’s dad then said to his son with a very low and grunt like voice as well as sounding like he’s been smoking for the past three hundred years, “You don’t need a costume son, you already look like a faggot.”

Little Forrest then had a frown on his face and a bit of a worried look and said to his dad, “But dad, mom says not to say the F word and…”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Your mom isn’t here you little shit.”

Little Forrest then said, “But that’s because after the judge ruled in her favor and got custody of me, you took out a ball point pen and stabbed her repeatedly until she bled to death.”

Forrest’s dad then started to laugh a little and said, “he..ha ha ha ha…oh that was a good one. Good times that we had. She was beautiful you know just like your sisters. I even remember the first day that I met her. I took her into the stallion’s bathroom at the bar and shoved my cock inside her ass. She kept yelling no, no, someone please help me. This stallion is trying to do anal with me. Oh what a night to remember that was. And after that we got married and she then had you.”

Little Forrest then said to his dad, “You called her a two-timing slut when you started to rip her eye balls out in front of the judge.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Yeah...and she deserved it too…that bitch. Thinking she can get away with not making me a sandwich and giving me a blowjob at the same time…I FUCKED HER UGLY ASS SISTER FOR HER WHEN HER UGLY ASS SISTER WAS ABOUT TO COMMIT SUICIDE…look…I’m sorry about that son. The bottom line is that you can’t go out because you need to grow up.”

Little Forrest then said to his dad, “But…I’m still a kid. I’m 8 years old and still in the second grade.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Exactly Billy.”

Forrest then said, “It’s Forrest dad…Forrest Fire…don’t you remember?”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Well Uhh…your whore of a mother named you so I have no fucking clue to be honest Bimmy.”

Little Forrest then said, “Forrest...”

Forrest’s Dad then said, “Whatever you little faggot. The point I’m trying to make is that you’re getting to that age where you need to be a stallion. And I’m not talking about these hippie stallions where they think love and friendship is the answer to everything. I’m talking about a REAL stallion where you see a pretty mare, you go up to that pretty mare, and you forcibly make love to her against her own will…just like how your mother and I met at the bar on that magical night. It was like love at first sight. But you’ll also need to learn how to FIGHT like a stallion too. Take me for example son. I go to a bar every other night, get drunk off my fucking ass, and then start a fight even when no wants to fight. That’s how a REAL stallion does it. A real stallion also doesn’t pay his bar tab, and if the bar owner has a problem with it…you kick him in the nuts. And if the authorities ask, you just say the Zebra did it.”

Little Forrest then said, “But…we’re living on the clouds. Zebras can’t even get up here.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Sure…that’s what they want you to believe. But mark my words, the zebras are hiding that they can fly and melt your brain with their minds. But enough about politics. What I’m trying to say is son…is that you’re a fucking faggot and you need to grow the hell up like your brothers and sisters god damn it.”

Little Forrest then said, “But…all my brothers are drug addicts and my sisters are either dead, selling their bodies out on the street, or being abused by their boyfriends that are alcoholics. And I think one of them is having an affair with a cloud I think.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “EXACTLY my son…that how you need to grow up. See…what you’re doing wrong is that you’re thinking with logic and whatever you smart asses do in school nowadays. You see, back in my day, we didn’t use this fancy thing called “math” or “investments.” You know what we did when we needed money?”

Little Forrest then said in an unsure way, “Getting a job?...”

Forest’s dad then said, “No no no! See…you’re thinking about it all wrong. What we did was we go up to whoever we saw on the street, pulled out a knife, and took their children hostage or something and told them if they didn’t give us all their money in their bank accounts, we were going to slit the little fuckers throats and then stab them seven hundred times until they saw pony Jesus.”

Little Forrest then asked, “Who’s Pony Jesus?”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Some ass clown with magic or something. We’re getting off track here. The point is that we knew how to do it back in my day. Nowadays all you fucking hippie sons of bitches are acting like pussies and shit. Nowadays it’s all about rainbows and sunshine and singing songs about how great friendship is. I tell ya….this country has gone down the fucking tube. AND I’L BE DAMNED IF MY SON IS GOING TO GROW UP AS ONE OF THOSE PUSSY ASS EATING FART NUGGETS! So…in other words Forrest…that’s why you aren’t allowed to go out on Halloween with your friends to go trick or treating. Because trick or treating is for pussy ass eating fart nuggets.”

Little Forrest then started to get sad and some tears were starting to well up in his eyes.

He then begged to his dad, “But dad, I want to go out trick or treating with my friends! We were going to hang out and ask for candy and be like every other kid!”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Son...you don’t have any friends. I’ve seen you at school while drinking some cloud beer before two o’ clock and I see you get bullied by everypony on the damn playground. Even the cripple kids bully you. Hell, even the one with autism bullies you while the one with polio farts in your face. And when you think it’s over, some hairy fat ass kid comes up to ya, beats you up until you have a bloody nose and asks for your lunch money. Now what kind of a son have I been raising huh? A son that just lets himself get beat up like that?”

Little Forrest then said, “But…you’re the hairy fat ass the beats me up and asks for my lunch money.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Damn straight. You’re a fucking pussy ass whipped son of a bitch there Forrest, you don’t even have any friends.”

Little Forrest then said, “But I do have friends.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “The only friends that you have is a roll of toilet paper, an apple core, and an empty box of cigarettes. Face it Forrest…you’re a loser and a faggot both at the same time because you don’t have any real friends. Instead you have your dolls.”

Little Forrest then said, “Hey! They’re not dolls…they’re action figures.”

Forrest’s dad then said, “Yeah right…whatever you say you faggot. So since you’re staying here and not being one of those pussy ass eating fart nuggets, be a stallion and bring me another cloud beer would ya?”

Little Forrest then begged, “But…I want to go Trick or Treating and…”

Forrest’s dad then cut him off by picking up the empty bottle of cloud beer in his hoof…I’m sure it was a hoof that is…and threw it against the wall near Forrest.

The empty beer bottle then shattered to pieces, almost hitting Little Forrest’s head and causing him some kind of harm.

And as the empty bottle of cloud beer was thrown and shattered against the wall, Forrest’s dad yelled as loud as he could and pounded his hoof on the recliner with great force, “I SAID BRING ME ANOTHER CLOUD BEER GOD DAMN IT!”

And then the flashback ended… do do do do do do do do do do…

BACK TO THE PRESENT…

And so the flashback ended and we could see each other again...well to be fair I’m not sure how flashbacks work. I mean we could still see each other but…whatever…I’m sure flashbacks includes quantum physics and mechanics and shit...who the fuck knows.

But anyways, once the flashback was over, Forrest was shaking his head with his eyes closed while looking a little sad and stuff and said to us, “And that’s why I started this.”

Forrest then opened up his eyes and continued to say, “I’ve always wanted to go out trick or treating out with my friends. And ever since I met you guys, I’ve been able to do so. And now that Knight is part of the group, now I get to share this experience was one other pony. With Wolf as well.”

Forest then put his hoof on my shoulder as he said those last words to me and smiled at me as well, all the while I was giving him a neutral expression on my face.

Then there was a brief few seconds of silence and then I said, “Well…your father wasn’t wrong…you are a faggot.”

Jack then said to Forrest, “Yeah…I think he should have hit you more. Hey can we get a flashback of that?”

A FEW YEARS BACK…

And here’s another flashback that we saw, but it was a quick one. What we saw was the kitchen of the trash home that Little Forrest was living in and Little Forrest was being slapped around back and forth by his dad while in front of the oven. And as far as the kitchen went, it was as trashy as the rest of the place.

Anyways, Forrest’s dad was back hoof slapping Little Forrest and was yelling out, “YOU. DON’T. EVER. LISTEN. TO. A. WORD. I. FUCKING. SAY. FAGGOT.”

And then the flashback ended…oh yeah…do do do do do do…

BACK TO THE PRESENT

And then the quick flashback was over and we went back to the present. And when we went back, Forrest was hanging his head down and was groaning/sighing a little bit as he couldn’t win and would forever remain a faggot for all eternity.

Well anyways, Arrell was then done looking for houses, yeah Arrell was multitasking with the houses and the flashback and shit.

Well, Arrell was done looking and he looked at us and he said to us with a smile, “Well, I found the houses.”

Forest then went from sad and depressed to smiling and being happy all of a sudden and said, “Yay!”

Arrell then went from a smiling face to a neutral face and then said, “But sadly all the houses are taken,”

Forrest then went from having a smiling face back to a depressing face. He then said, “Awww…”

But I was confused and I then asked Arrell, “What do you mean exactly the houses are taken?”

Arrell then explained to me, “Oh…it’s simple. In order to avoid that it looks like we’re pedophiles since it’s mostly kids out at night, we need to stay at least thirty feet away from the children at all times. Otherwise other ponies are going to look at us suspiciously and think we’re trying to take their kids or something. Which to be fair Neon does from time to time but…no one cares. We just let him do whatever he wants. But still, we need to be safe and only go to the houses where little to no children is around. So usually the ones that fucking suck most of the time.”

I was still a bit confused as to what Arrell had just said and then asked him, “But…we’re the Elements of Protection. How can anypony here mistake us for pedophiles?”

Arrell then said, “You would think so...but nope…I mean that’s how it is nowadays. You go near a child and you’re automatically labeled a pedophile. Hell, make a joke about kids and the pedophiles come running up to you and asking you to join their club. So unless the children give us consent, we can’t go near them. In which case they don’t even know what rape is yet.”

Jack then butted in the conversation, “Oh don’t worry about that…once they get to that certain age I’ll set them right and teach them about rape…and how to commit it.”

I then asked Jack, “Why?”

Jack then said, “Knight, I don’t even give a fuck about my little brother. What makes you think I want to do right by other’s kids?”

I then thought about it for a few seconds, but I then said to Jack, “huh…you might have a point there…but…where are those three little fuckers anyway?”

Mac then stepped in and said, “Oh don’t worry about those little buggers. I was worried that they would go to Applejack and trick or treat over there so in order to make sure they don’t get kidnapped by Applejack and her evil apples, I tied them up and put duct tape over their mouths in my barn. Yup…even pad locked it too…no one can get in or out. Not even me. So they’ll starve to death. And but don’t worry though. I left them was some adult supervision. I hired our local, creepy pedophile to watch over the children. So if the pedophile doesn’t them, starvation and survival of the fittest will.”

I then said to Mac, “Oh, ok then, that’s nice to know.”

Arrell then said to us all, “So shall we head out to the little cottage somewhat near the edge of town that is nowhere near those little kids?”

Forrest the jumped up in the air like a child that he sort of was at heart…and a faggot…and said with a big ol’ smile on his face, “LET’S GO!”

Once Forrest came down from the air and landed on the ground, we all started looking at him and it looked like Forrest was a bit confused from just looking at his face.

But then he just went from having a happy smile on his face to a sad smile on his face and started to have his head hanging low to the ground and said to us, “I know…I’m a faggot…you guys don’t have to say it.”

Jack then said, “No Forrest why would we ever say that to you? We don’t think you’re a faggot for jumping up high in the air and yelling like a little bitch.”

Forrest’s head then came back up and he then had a small, warming smile form across his mouth as his eyes showed a little bit of hope.

But then that little bit of hope was crushed as soon as Jack then completed his thought by saying, “You’re a pussy ass easting fart nugget…just like what your father said.”

Forrest’s smile then disappeared to a disappointing look on his face where that smile went from up to concerning and just not in the best of all moods.

And then Neon came sliding from out of nowhere it seems from behind Forrest and put his left forearm on Forrest’s back neck, all the while having his trademark smile across his face and said to Forrest with such energy in his voice, “Yeah Forrest you’re a Pussy Ass Eating Fart Nugget…just like all those juice that the Nazi Nuggets gassed the other day!”

Forrest then went back to having a confused look on his face and raised one eye brow up and asked Neon, “What?”

Then Neon just simply stood there, having a smile on his face, and not saying a single word. And then small, but noticeable army of Nuggets came walking by us. They looked like they came from McDonalds and they had little tiny legs and arms that then proceeded to walk like the Third Reich and shit and had their one arm raised up high as they walked.

They were also carrying rifles and didn’t look like the most friendly of all chicken nuggets. And we even saw what appeared to be a Chicken Nugget version of Hitler leading the army of Nazi Nuggets. All the Nazi Nuggets had a little army green German helmet on, with little beady eyes and a mouth that that is in a form of a frown…an angry frown like a black guy. And the Hitler Nugget had pretty much the same look, minus the helmet of course with a small hair cut, a little mustache, and also wore a fancy Hitler suit…because it was a Hitler Nugget.

And the Hitler Nugget was leading the march of the Nazi nuggets while also having its arms up way high and saying as it marched, in a tiny, small voice that sounded cute like Alvin and the Chipmunks…but not really, “SIG HIEL! SIG HEIL! SIG HIEL! SIG HIEL! SIG HIEL!”

And all the other Nazi Nugget soldiers would say in unison after the Hitler nugget would speak, “SIG HIEL! SIG HIEL! SIG HIEL! SIG HIEL! SG HIEL!”

And you would think with Neon is pretty much the one causing this…I’m assuming that is because at this point...I’m not sure if this stuff happens on its own or Neon is the cause…but the Nazi Nuggets stopped once the Hitler Nugget noticed Forest just standing there…and of course Forrest noticed the Nazi Nuggets as well.

Well with the Hitler Nugget, once he stopped, he took one good look at Forrest and then looked towards his Nazi Nugget Army and said as loud as he could form his tiny voice, “HAAAAAAALT!”

Then the Hitler Nugget walked towards Forrest and got closer to him to inspect him. As the Hitler Nugget got close, the Hitler Nugget’s eyes squinted a little bit and it raised its tiny little arm, scratching under its mouth…as if it was pretending it had a chin.

Then the Hitler Nugget said, “Hmmmm…”

Forrest was starting to become unsettled by this…mostly because a Nazi Nugget was checking him out. And I can understand where Forrest was coming from. Look…I’m into some weird stuff sometimes…but I don’t swing that way ok. My sexual orientation is not a chicken nugget. I know some people would get off to that when looking up that on Porn Hub, I’m sure people cum like crazy for that shit…but me and Forrest, we didn’t swing that way…although I think Mac and Neon would be though. Defiantly Neon…he’s into some weird shit…but Mac…maybe…he looked at those Nazi Nuggets and he licked his lips. So either he was a meat eater…or he was looking at the Nazi Nugget’s sweet asses. In which case…I can just imagine the sexy, funky music going on right now in Mac’s head.

All the while Mac licking his succulent lips…waiting to eat that Nazi Nugget ass…and put it into some dipping sauce….and then maybe have sex with it later on. Honestly, who knows…but whatever. Anyways, the Hitler Nugget kept looking at Forrest and even walked around him a little bit, inspecting every inch of his body. And as Forrest saw this, he just had eyes that looked like they were half sad and half worried and wondered what the fuck was going on. And as the Hitler Nugget moved around him, he sort of moved a little bit too, unsure what the Hitler Nugget was going to do, so he moved in motion with the Hitler Nugget just in case he tried to pull a fast one on him.

And about a minute later, the Hitler Nugget stopped moving and put his arm down and put both of his tiny arms behind his chicken nugget back and said in a tiny voice while still having his eyes squinting, “May I see your papers please?”

Forrest then said “Uhhh…what papers?”

Then one of the Nazi nuggets that looked like the right hand man to the Hitler Nugget walked up to Forrest with a small intimidating look on its face and jumped high in the air, or at least to Forrest’s face that is, and gave him a big ol’ slap across the face. And surprisingly, the Nazi Nugget general, which I’m sure that Nazi Nugget was the general…maybe…had enough strength to really give it to Forrest as he slapped him across the face as Forrest’s head moved towards the right, as if the force that Forrest received was a bit too much for him. That or Forrest is just that much of a weakling.

And once the Nazi Nugget General came down from the ground, it raised its right tiny arms and pointed at Forrest and yelled in a tiny voice, “YOU DO NOT SPEAK TO THE FURHER UNLESS YOU HAVE BEEN ASKED TO SPEEEEEEEAK!!! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR TO YOUUUUUUUUUU!?”

Then Forrest, as he raised his left hoof up to his face and covered the spot where the Nazi Nugget general had slapped him, Forrest then said, “Uhhh…yes?”

After Forrest had said that to the Nazi Nugget General, the Nazi Nugget General then jumped up high in the air once more and slapped the other side of Forrest’s face that he didn’t slap before. And again, it moved Forrest’s head a little bit, indicating the force from the Nazi Nugget General was a bit too much for Forrest.

And once the Nazi Nugget General landed on the ground, he raised his right arm again and pointed at Forrest and said, “I SAID NOT TO SPEEEEEEAK UNLESS SPOKEN TO!!! YOU SHALL SHOW US RESPECT DAMN IT!!!”

Then the Nazi Nugget General jumped up into the air once again and slapped Forrest again on the right side of his face and once again, Forrest’s head moved, you get the idea.

And once the Nazi Nugget General landed on the ground, it quickly yelled, in his tiny little voice, “RESPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECT!”

Then the Hitler Nugget signaled the Nazi Nugget General to move back to the rest of the army that was right behind the Hitler Nugget and the Nazi Nugget General marched right back to his original position before it had moved to fuck with Forrest. And then the Hitler Nugget continued to have its eyes squint and stare at Forrest, as if it was waiting to see if Forest would make a false move or something.

And once the Nazi Nugget General was back into position and a few seconds had passed, the Hitler Nugget then started to ask Forrest, “Tell me red creature…why do you not have your papers?”

Forrest was then about to speak, but then became hesitant and closed his mouth, worried what might happen next if the Nazi Nugget General were to come over again and try and hit him again. In fact, Forrest looked over and saw that the Nazi Nugget General was giving him a cold stare. And then Forrest looked back to Hitler’s squinting eyes, awaiting an answer from him. And all the while, the rest of us was just chilling back, watching the whole thing unfold because we don’t give a fuck what happens.

Well, at least for me and Jack that is, Mac kind of just stood there with wide eyes…thinking about maybe taking one of those Nazi Nuggets and raping it in bed and Neon was just standing there, staring into empty space, minding his own business, all the while giving his usual big ol’ smile that I’m sure is also trademarked. Yup…Neon just smiling…while also being crossed eyed I mind you. And Arrell…well he too was minding his own business.

Well, the Hitler Nugget then calmly said in his tiny little voice, “You may speak red creature. I would like to know why you have no papers on you. You do know that you must have ze papers on you at all times...right red creature?”

Forrest still remained hesitant to speak, but after feeling the tension in the air between him and the Hitler Nugget, he then said to the Hitler Nugget the best he could without chickening out, “Uhhh…I lost it?”

The Hitler Nugget just only stood in silence, staring at Forrest with his beady little eyes and becoming ever more suspicious of him with every passing second that went by.

So the Hitler Nugget then said to Forrest, “Hmmmmm…I see. And are you sure red creature that you lost. It?”

Forrest then said, “Uhhhh…yes…”

Then the Hitler Nugget immediately jumped with anger and grabbed on to his chest and had such force as if he was controlling Forrest’s every movement. And as soon as the Hitler Nugget jumped on to Forrest’s chest, Forrest moved his head back in order to get a better view of the Hitler Nugget’s position and as well as to see what he was going to do next. But the Hitler Nugget was only merely angered by Forrest’s comment towards him as it was not a satisfying answer that he had wanted to hear from him.

And so the Hitler Nugget, with an angered face and all, grabbed on to Forrest’s chest and start to shake him violently and said as loud as he could with his tiny little voice, “YOU LIAR! YOU DD NOT LOSE ZE PAPERS! YOU NEVER HAD ZE PAPERS IN THE FIRST PLACE! YOU NEVER HAD ZE PAPERS IN THE FIRST PALCE BECAUSE YOU’RE A DIRTY PUSSY ASS EATING FART NUGGET!”

And then the Hitler Nugget gave one big slap on Forrest’s face and again, the force was strong enough that it moved Forrest’s head to the right…because you know…laws of physics I guess…and the Hitler Nugget then calmly asked Forrest, “And do you know what we do to Pussy Ass Eating Fart Nuggets red creature?”

Forrest then whimpered out of his moth in a soft tone, “No?”

The Hitler Nugget then yelled as loud as he could with his tiny little voice, “WE SEND THEM TO THE OVENS…RIGHT NEXT TO THE TENDIES! GENERAL!”

After the Hitler Nugget called for its Nazi Nugget General, the Nazi Nugget General stepped forward and a few steps and had its back straighten and everything and looked like it was prepared for any command that the Hitler Nugget gave it and that it would carry out those orders to its grave. And the Nazi Nugget General also still had those stern looking eyes, having them remain straightforward as the Hitler Nugget spoke to the Nazi Nugget General. And so the Nazi Nugget General said to the Hitler Nugget, “YES MY FUHRER!?”

The Hitler Nugget then said to the Nazi Nugget general, “I WANT YOU TO PUT THIS FILTH ON THE NEXT TRAIN TO AUSTIZ AND PUT HIM IN THE WORK CAMP RIGHT NEXT TO THE CAMP THAT WE STORE THE JUICE IN! AND AS SOON AS I HAVE RETURNED FROM MY BUSINESS…I WILL PERSONALLY SEND THIS DIRTY PUSSY ASS EATING FART NUGGET RED CREATURE TO THE GAS CHAMBERS AND OVENS!”

And then a noise came from the distance that abruptly ended the Hitler Nugget’s rant towards Forrest for being a Pussy Ass Eating Fart Nugget as it started to send some chills down the Hitler Nugget’s spine…assuming he has a spine that is. And as the sound got closer and, the Hitler Nugget’s face went from pure anger to being shocked, as the Hitler Nugget had his mouth agape and his eyes trained forward, awaiting if the sound were to be what it was thinking.

And soon, a Nazi Nugget that was more than likely a private, came running from the distance. The Hitler Nugget heard this Nazi Nugget’s cry as it turned his head around, as well as the other Nazi Nuggets and the Nazi Nugget General, as they too feared what was coming.

The Nazi Nugget that was running towards the Nazi Nugget Army was yelling towards the Hitler Nugget, “MY FURHER! STALIN AND HIS RED ARMY ARE HERE! THEY HAVE FOUND US! WE MUST MOVE QUICKLY BEFORE…”

And soon that Nazi Nugget soldier that was running was blown to bits and his body went everywhere as he was hit by a bullet…a big bullet that looked like it came from a tank. And as that particular Nazi Nugget Soldier’s body went everywhere, the other Nazi Nugget soldiers looked upon in horror as one of their own was blown to bits and his body parts were covering the other Nazi Nugget soldiers. One of the Nazi Nugget soldiers even puked up as their fellow soldier’s guts were on them and they could smell the awful, foul stench that it gave off. But to me and the other guys, it was just white meat that got sprayed everywhere.

Looked and smelled good too but I was a pony so I couldn’t eat meat…or else everyone would think I was some kind of wacko…you know what I’m saying? And so after that horrific sight…at least to the Nazi Nugget Army that is…green tanks started rolling in that were small to us, but big to the Nazi Nugget Army, and the sound started to grow louder and louder as other tanks came from behind the first tank that killed the running Nazi Nugget from before.

And on the tank, it wasn’t just green but there was also a red star that was outlined with yellow along with a picture of a hammer and sickle within the star as well. The Nazi Nugget Army were starting to prepare for what appeared to be an oncoming attacked by this so called Stalin and his Red Army as the Nazi Nugget Army got into position and aimed their rifles towards the Red Army as well as the Nazi Nugget General ready to lead the charge.

As for the Hitler Nugget, it was still hanging off of Forrest’s chest, but it was still looking off towards the direction of the tanks and looked pissed as well as if the tanks had ruined his day or some shit like that. So as the Nazi Nugget Army was prepared for a fight, the tanks on the other hand just stopped where they killed that one Nazi Nugget solider.

And then a few second of nothing happened…but then something happened as the top little hole where the person would get into the tank popped opened…the lid that was…and what came out…was a piece of dog shit. No literally…a piece of fucking dog shit came out. It was elongated and everything, like if it was from a human that took the shit, but it still looked like it was shit that came from a dog…but it looked like human shit though. But this wasn’t any elongated dog shit that was standing out from the little hole that was located on top of the tank.

Oh no…this was the dog shit that was the leader of this Red Army…the thing itself…Stalin. And as the piece of dog shit came from the hole, the Nazi Nuggets saw as it was Stalin that was appearing before them as they stood there in fear and watched. On the other hand, the Hitler Nugget was just pissed that it was Stalin.

And so as Stalin emerged from his little hidey hole, there was one sort of thin, black line across towards the top of the piece of dog shit that appeared to be his eyes with no actual eye balls and such as right beneath those so called eyes was a thick, black mustache and a corn pipe of all things. I guess this Stalin liked smoking some of that wacky tobacky I suppose. Anyways, this Stalin also had a green general hat on, as well as some stars to go along with that green hat.

And as Stalin fully emerged himself to be seen and known by all that was near, Stalin said in a Russian accent to the Hitler Nugget, “Oh look…it wittle old Hitler and his tiny wittle army of Nazis… ha ha ha ha ha! They are so cute…right fellas?”

And soon all the tanks that had stopped behind the main tank up in front, popped out from the other holes, Red Army soldiers that also looked like pieces of dog shit and had a similar appearance to Stalin…with the exception of the mustache and corn pipe as well as a regular solider helmet on top of their heads.

And some ground troops of the Red Army followed in suit as well and started to laugh…although the odd part though was that none of them had any hand or arms or legs. They just walked and stayed perfectly balanced with whatever shit was underneath them…although they did jump up and down a little bit to move around from what I could tell. And they were still holding rifles themselves as well which was a little weird without arms or hands…but somehow it worked out for them so I don’t question it. Anyways, all the pieces of dog shit started laughing towards the Hitler Nugget and his Nazi Nugget Army.

The Nazi Nugget Army just stood there…looking a bit butt hurt and maybe a bit worried as well as with what was happening to them that their mortal enemy, the Red Army, had shown up to crash their party. But the Hitler Nugget was standing around as he was still hanging on to Forrest’s chest, as he looked pissed and filled with pure and utter rage.

The Hitler Nugget then pointed with his left arm and said to Stalin, “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE! I THOUGHT WE TOLD YOU GUYS THAT THIS IS OUR TERRITORY!?”

Stalin then said in a sarcastic, Russian tone, “Ooopps I guess it slipped my mind!”

The Hitler Nugget then yelled, “BUT WE MADE A TREATY DAMN IT!?”

Stalin then said, “OHHHH…BOO HOO… YOU HEAR THAT GUYS...THE WITTLE HITLER ISN’T GETTING HIS WAY AND NOW HE’S GOING TO CRY! LET’S ALL LAUGH AT HIS EMBRESSMENT BECAUSE ITS HUMITLATING AND FUNNY TO US BECAUSE THEY ARE MSIERABLE AND WE ARE NOT! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA H!”

Stalin and his Red Army then laughed as loud as they could in their Russian accents with great movements around their stomach area as it moved up in down, almost as if they couldn’t handle the laughter themselves and that they would be laughed to death or something…hmmmm…that reminds me of something, oh well noel…it probably isn’t important, but all of the Red Army including Stalin laughed in unison. And I’m sure if they had arms and fingers, they would be pointing at the Nazi Nugget Army as well as they were doing it.

The Nazi’s just stood there…having sad faces on as they were being humiliated in front of Stalin’s red army…that and they were chicken nuggets after all…maybe even questionably sexy chicken nuggets that anyone would want to fuck. But the Hitler Nugget was only pissed off as his face somehow started to turn red around what would be the cheek area and soon the Hitler Nugget finally got off of Forrest’s chest…because he wanted to get Hitler off of his chest…I don’t now…that doesn’t sound right…but whatever.

The Hitler Nugget jumped off of Forrest’s chest and landed on the ground effortlessly and started to walk towards Stalin and his Red Army and pointed at him while saying as loud as he could in his tiny voice, “YOU DIRTY COMMIE MOTHER FUCKERS!”

Stalin then said in still a mocking voice, “Oh look…thre wittle baby Hitler is trying to be a big boy and yell at me! Ha ! Grow up Hitler…you and your Nazi army is simply too childish for this world. Go away and come back when you’re real men and ready to fight you pansies! You’re too soft to fight…we would eat you up and chew you out in just a few seconds because of how weak you are all! So come back when you have balls Hitler!”

The Hitler Nugget then said, “I WILL NOT BE MADE A FOOL OF GOD DAMN IT!”

Then the Nazi Nugget General came walking towards the Hitler Nugget and gently placed his hand on the Hitler Nugget’s shoulder…or back or whatever you would call that is near the Hitler Nugget’s arm and simply said to the Hitler Nugget, “Muh Fuhrer, maybe these commies are right. Maybe we need to come back when we have all been properly trained to take on these pieces of dog shit. We are only merely but a small army after all.”

The Hitler Nugget then thought about what the Nazi Nugget General was saying in his ear…that was there somewhere…I don’t know either. But anyways, The Hitler Nugget was thinking about what he was told and part of it was considering to give up and let the anger go and just try to be stronger next time he comes across Stalin and his Red Army. Part of the Hitler Nugget wanted to be a better leader towards his Nazi Nugget army…but then it hit him. The Hitler Nugget couldn’t give up, as he knew that deep down inside himself, that if he were to give up now…it would only mean failure for the future is to surely come.

So the Hitler Nugget dug deep down within himself and quickly shrugged off the Nazi Nugget General’s hand and his words and swiftly turned around to look at his Nazi Nugget Army.

The Hitler Nugget then raised both of his arms up high in the air and yelled out, “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WE WILL NOT BE DEFEATED BY PURE SCUM AND FILTH! WE WILL NOT LET THEM WIN AT ANY COSTS! DO NOT HEAR WHAT THEYAHVE TO SAY! DO NOT BE LAUGHED AT AND TAKE IT UP THE ASS LIKE A BITCH! WE SHOULD BE LAUGHING AT THEM AS WE FORCE IT UP THEIR ASSES! INSTEAD WE MUST FIGHT BACK AT ALL COSTS EVEN IF IT MEANS DEATH! I COMMAND YOU ALL TO PUMP ARIYIAN BLOOD INTO YOUR FUCKING VIENS AND START SHOOTING THESE CUNT MOTHER FUCKERS RIGHT NOW DAMN IT!”

The Hitler Nugget’s dazzling speech left all of the Nazi Nugget Army speechless as each of the Nazi Nugget soldiers started to have confidence build up inside of them and smiles upon their faces pretty much said that they were starting to get the idea what the Hitler Nugget was trying to tell them. And soon all the soldiers and the Nazi Nugget Army started to rile up and grow louder and louder as they started to cheer on the Hitler Nugget’s speech.

And as they cheered on the Hitler Nugget, they raised their rifles high into the air and cheered as loud as they could and as for the Nazi Nugget General, he merely had a small tear upon his face and had a single tear flowing downwards from his left eye and onto his face.

To him, the speech that the Hitler Nugget gave was simply beautiful and awe inspiring.

And as for the Hitler Nugget, he was only getting started and he turned around towards Stalin and his Red Army and pointed his right arm towards Stalin as he was just sitting in his tank and said to him, “WE’RE GOING TO FUCKING RIP OUT YOUR FUCKING TESTICLES STALIN AND GLUE IT TO OUR BALLS SO WE WILL HAVE MORE BALLS THAN YOU! ATTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!”

And as the Hitler Nugget gave his command, the Nazi Nugget army started to yell and give a battle cry that was traditional for them.

The battle cry for the Nazi Nugget Army was, “FICKT DEN SAFT.”

Yeah…I have no idea what it means...I would look it up but…I’m still in Equestria…and I’m too lazy to go to a universe with earth in it…so whatever. Anyways, the Nazi Nugget Army proceeded to aim their rifles towards the Red Army and start firing. Sad to say, the Nazi Nugget army had good enough aiming that rivals the storm troopers. So as each shot was missing any of the soldiers at the Red Army, Stalin and his dog shit men was just sitting there, not being affected by this at all.

To them, it was only merely pathetic that the Nazi Nugget Army was missing them again and again and again.

And soon one of the soldiers of the Red Army that was part of the ground troops walked up right next to Stalin and he then quietly asked Stalin while the Nazi Nugget Army was shooting at them in the worst possible way, “Uh sir…do you think we should be attacking now?”

Stalin then thought about it for a few seconds, but he then came to the conclusion of, “Uh no…no we shouldn’t.”

Then the soldier then asked in a nice Russian accent as usual, “But sir…they are firing at us and we should technically fire back.”

Stalin then said back to the ground troop, “I know…but…this is just sad. Tell you what, we’re going to “retreat” and lead them back to the graveyard where we’ll fuck them up. That way we can humiliate them some more.”

The ground troop then had a smile I think and he then said, “Yes…that does sound like a good idea. You are such a great leader Stalin.”

Stalin then said, “Yes…Yes I am…and for that, you will be sent to the Goolag.”

The measly ground troop was then shocked and taken aback by what Stalin had said to him and he then said out loud, “What!? But you can’t do this! I followed your every word!”

Stalin then said to the ground troop, “Yes…but you see Ground Troop…the reason why you’re being sent to the Goolag is because…I don’t know…fuck you…TAKE HIM AWAY COMERADS!”

And then two pieces of dog shit came hoping right next to the ground troop while in a black armor and then somehow grabbed him without having any arms and then started to drag the ground troop away from the little battle that the Nazi Nugget Army was having.

And as the ground troop was being taken away to be worked to death at the Goolag, he was yelling out loud as he was being taken away against his own will, “NO! NO! NOT DA DGOOLAG! I’LL PROMISE I’LL BE GOOD! 2 +2 = 5! 2 + 2 = 5!! 2 + 2 = 5!!!”

Stalin then said quietly to himself, “Heh...faggot.”

Stalin the turned around from his tank and then said to the rest of the Red Army in a sarcastic tone, “OH NO! THE NAZIS ARE FIRING AT US! COME. LET US RUN AWAY AS THEY ARE GOING TO KILL US IF WE DO NOT GET AWAY FROM THEM AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! LET US RUN BACK TO OUR BASE OF OPERATIONS WHERE THEY SURELY CAN’T GET US THERE! LET US RUN AWAY RIGHT NOW AND RETREAT!”

And soon all the tanks turned around quickly as well as the other ground troops and started to somewhat, slowly hop/run away from the Nazi Nugget Army.

And as they were running away, the Hitler Nugget then had a big grin form on his face and he then said out loud as he could in his tiny voice, “HA! WE DID IT! FINALLY! WE’VE GOT THEM ON THE RUN! Now quickly my fellow Nazi Nugget Army! We must strike while the iron is hot! Or as the queers say, LET’S GANG BANG THEM!”

And then all of the Nazi Nugget Army soldiers roared and cheered as they praised the Hitler Nuggets words of wisdom. And then the Nazi Nugget Army yelled out their battle cry, which was once again, FICKT DEN SAFT, and started going after Stalin and his Red Army. And as the Nazi Nugget Army was out of our view, the Nazi Nugget General followed behind the Nazi Nugget Army. And soon, after the Nazi Nugget General left our view, the Hitler Nugget was the last to go, and soon, he ran away and was out of our way…

Until he popped up into our sights one more time and pointed at Forrest and yelled, “DO NOT THINK I HAVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU RED CREATURE! AS SOON AS I HAVE KILLED THAT BASTARD STALIN…I WILL COME FOR YOU AND THE REST FO THE PUSSY ASS EATING FART NUGGETS IN THIS WORLD AND SEND YOU ALL TO THE OVENS! AND IF NOT…THEN DON’T THINK THIS IS OVER EITHER! WE WILL MEET AGAIN IN ANOTHER TIME, ANOTHER UNIVERSE EVEN! FICKT DEN SAFT!!!”

And then the Hitler Nugget and his Nazi Nugget Army was gone. And then there was a moment of silence between all of us as Forrest was still trying to figure what had just happened and I was waiting to see if anyone else would say something of note. As before, Neon was still standing there, in his own little world, and the others were doing their own thing. Although I believe Mac was a little sad on the inside as he didn’t get a chance to fuck the Nazi Nuggets like he had wanted…but who knows...maybe he was already in a committed relationship with apples and he didn’t want to cheat on them.

That or I was assuming wrong maybe, but who cares, Mac is Mac…there’s no telling what he’s thinking. With Neon on the other hand…no one wants to know what he’s thinking.

But anyways, it was just silence for a few seconds until I decided to break the ice and say to everyone, “I don’t mean to be that guy…but I kind of want to get this Halloween Special over with already. This is already way too long. So how about we get to trick or treating so we can end this special already huh?”

Arrell then said, “Ok then. Follow me.”

And so Arrell went ahead and started to lead us towards the little cottage as to where we would trick or treat first at. And as soon as Arrell was far ahead of us, Neon then followed suit and soon Jack followed behind Neon and then Mac and Forrest and then I was the last…well…was going to be second to last, but then I realized that Wolf wasn’t behind me.

I then quickly turned around as the rest of the guys went ahead and I noticed Wolf wasn’t following, nor was he paying attention to what we were doing, and possibly wasn’t even paying attention to the whole Nazi Nugget thing, and was instead staring at the rest of the ponies trick or treating. He was just staring at all the other ponies, as if he was caught in some kind of weird trance that he couldn’t break free from.

So I then asked Wolf, “Hey Wolf…are you coming?”

Wolf then responded to me without looking me in the eye, how rude, “Yeah…sure…i-in a minute Knight.”

I then was a bit confused as Wolf was a bit hesitant in his wording…and usually he’s cussing or something like of that nature.

So I had a weird, confused look on my face, but then decided to say to Wolf, “Uhh…we’re going to our first house to trick or treat. The guys have already left so we need to go now Wolf if you want any candy…or possibly roofers.”

Wolf then turned his head towards me without turning his body of course, all while still in his little ghost costume and he looked at me with big wide eyes as if he saw something of importance and said to me in a weird tone, “Yeah...uh…I think…I think I’m just going to go and skip trick or treating this year Knight.”

I then was a bit curious as my left eye brow was raised, I asked Wolf, “Why?”

Wolf then said to me, “I’m checking out some of these mares and their costumes and they look fine as shit.”

I then said to Wolf, “Ok…so what? A lot of costume look fine as shit…and some questionably that looks like it has STD’s ridden all over it…but still…”

Wolf then said to me, “Yeah…but some of these mare’s asses…they’re calling to me.”

I then rolled my eyes and then said to Wolf, “Go ahead Wolf.”

Wolf then looked like he might have had a big smile under that costume, as he looked a bit excited with his body language.

Wolf then turned his head back towards the mares and their asses he was staring at and I then yelled as he was running, “DON’T KNOCK ANY OF THEM UP THIS TIME! WE HAD TO DEAL WITH THRITY ABOERTIONS LAST TIME AND ALL THE ABORTED FETUS’S GHOST CAME TO HAUNT US! I DON’T WANT TO HAVE TO DO THAT AGAIN DAMN IT!”

And so with Wolf going off on his own, I went ahead and caught up to the other guys as they were far ahead of me by that point.

A FEW MINUTES LATER

Well, it took me a while, but I eventually caught up to them and by the time I had caught up to them, we were already at the place that Arrell was scouting for…in which case it was far away and from where we originally were at, only looked like a mere speck.

So it isn’t interesting that Arrell found it from all the way from the spot that he was scouting for a place to go and trick or treat to. But with that being said, we were at the cottage, far, far away from any kids that may or may not go stranger danger on us or some shit. And when we got there, it was almost like we were the only ones there, no other pony else around, just the pure silence of the night and a cricket that wouldn’t shut the fuck up. I’m sure if I had found the cricket, I would put it a gun to its ass, and kill it.

Anyways, we got to the cottage and when we got there, it looked nice. It was small, had that particular design as if it belonged in Ponyville or a medieval period of time or some shit. The windows were open as no curtains was in front f it and there was smoke coming from the chimney, indicating that someone was in there, doing something with the fire place.

That or they were burning alive, either way, you know something was going on inside. And the roof had that hay thing on top…not sure why some ponies have hay on top of their houses...or…maybe it’s not hey but very brown grass. I don’t know...what to say other than it looked kind of weird, but like I said, it looked like it belonged in Ponyville or some shit. And in the front of the cottage was a door of course, but there was also Halloween decorations and such scattered throughout the place.

Some were Jack o’ lanterns while others were pictures of black cats and spooky skeletons that were moving in a pre-determined motion, indicating it was done by a simple and more than likely cheap machine made in Chinaland where fillies and colts are worked to death and probably commit self forever sleep as well after a long hard day’s work.

But then they just pussy out because they don’t have the balls to choke themselves to death with an Super Nintendo controller…because those don’t exist in this universe…instead it’s a joy boy…but the sad part is there’s no wires to commit self forever sleep with.

Oh I’m sorry I mean suicide…there that’s better. Anyways, the place was nice and everything and when I caught up with the guys, they were all standing side by side, looking at it, and I’m sure waiting for me.

When I caught up Arrell noticed I was late, and he was about to ask me something but then Mac cut him off before Arrell could speak and he asked me as he came close to me and touched my face with both of his hooves, “Are you ok Knight!? We thought we lost back there! Was it Applejack that held you hostage!? I bet it was Applejack!”

Mac then let go of my face and then went back to going to all four for half a second.

But then he raised his right forearm high into the air and shook it like he was pissed or something and he then yelled out as loud as he could in the distance behind me, “YOU HEAR ME APPLEJACK! WE WON’T BE DEFEATED BY YOU AND YOUR HOSTAGE TAKING NON-SENSE!”

I then put my left forearm up and touched his right forearm and pushed it down back towards the ground and gave him a signal to calm down.

I then said to Mac, “Applejack didn’t get me, I talked to Wolf and he said he isn’t coming and instead wants to get more STD’s or something…in which case I’m telling you, I’m sick of having to cure his STD’s every time he goes out looking for ass. He has Molestia but noooo…he needs more ass…which is fair but…still…gets on my nerves.”

Arrell then said, “Well that’s fine then. As long as he isn’t going for my animals assess, we’re fine. Those are my asses. Anyways, let’s do this shit. The other kids should e clearing up other parts of Stalia pretty soon so we should get going quick and get us some sweet candy.”

Forrest then had a big ol’ smile across his face with big eyes that sparkled a little bit and he said excitedly, “Oh boy! I can’t wait! This is my first time trick or treating with Knight in our group of friends!”

I then said as I got right next to Arrell and Mac got right next to me and we all lined up side by side with each other, in front of the cottage, “Well…this is the special I suppose. At least it isn’t complicated. Well…let’s go get us some candy. We all know what to do…right guys?”

Jack then said, “Yeah…of course we do Knight. What do you think we are…retarded?...we’re supposed to trick them first right?”

I then said to jack, “No, you say trick or treat and if they give you a piece of candy, you walk away…WITHOUT TRYING TO KILL THEM…and if they don’t, well you’re supposed to trick them…that or take them hostage...either way, you’ll get something in the end. So we’re not going to make this overly complicated then it has to be…right guys?”

As I looked at all of the guys, they all nodded their heads…except for Neon who just looked at me with a smile as usual...but what do you expect from him?

So I then said, “Alright then. Let’s go.”

And then we all walked up to the cottage and somewhat walked in unison a little bit and as we got closer to the door, the straight line that we had made together, the six of us, started to become more or less a half circle so we could all crowd around the front door of the cottage. And once we got to the front door, we were all in our costumes and getting our bags ready somehow. I knocked on the door with my right hoof with confidence that nothing was going to get fucked up in any way, shape or form.

And once I did, there was a few seconds of silence, enough to get us to build up anticipation as to what will happen next. Surely it will go good and smoothly right? Surely no monster or overly complicated thing will come through that door that would set off a chain of events to take place that would make this Halloween special more longer than it needed to be…right? Well you are right there my friend, but no prize, just depression and shame is all you get, but we got a normal looking pony, she was a mare. She looked like she was pushing forty and looked kind and sweet.

Her coat color was a light-ish purple and she had what appeared to be a blue cutie mark of something…a light baby blue that is. And she was an earth pony as well, which would sort of explain why she was living a bit farther away than the other ponies that lived in Stalia. She also had a mane style that was all bundled up, whatever that hair style is called where it’s in a bun and in a swirl. Oh who gives a rat’s ass, but she looked like a nice mare and she was a nice mare as well as her voice said it.

Once she had opened the door, she also had a bowl of candy being carried on top of one hoof and looked like she was ready to meet and greet kids.

She also had a warm smile on her face and as she spoke, her voice was kind and welcoming, she said to us, “Oh why hello there. Well aren’t you all…”

Jack then interrupted her and he yelled out as he quickly got on to his two back legs to stand and raised the iron lead pipe up with his two hooves and screamed to the top of his lungs, “TRICK OR TREAT!”

And then Jack bashed in the old lady’s skull three times, as blood spurted out from everywhere and I think parts of her brain came out too, not sure though, but I thought I saw some pink stuff. And you could also hear the skull crackling as well as she immediately was pretty much dead by this point and was not expecting it whatsoever.

And as soon as Jack was done bashing in the old lady’s skull in, he had a smile on his face and he looked towards me and he asked me, “Did I say Trick or Treat right?”

I was then a bit hesitant to answer back to him, but I then was about to say something, “Uhhhh…”

But sadly Jack cut me off before I could say anything and he said with a big ol’ smile on his face, “Great! Now Let’s get us some treats!”

And so Jack jumped through the glass window, as the windows were open, just not the glass part. And so as broken glass shattered everywhere, Jack went in and tried to steal some of the old lady’s stuff.

As for Mac, as soon as Jack went inside, he then yelled out to everyone else still outside as well giving a gasp, “THERE MIGHT BE HOTSAGES APPLEJACK HELD UP IN THE BASEMENT! OF COURSE! HOW COULD I NOT HAVE KNOWN ABOUT IT UNUTIL NOW! IT’S OBVIOUS THAT APPLEJACK TIED UP POOR INCOCENT LITTLE KIDS AND PUT THEM IN THE BASEMENT! I’M COMING KIDS! I’LL SVAE YOU FROM THE MEANCE THAT IS APPLEJACK!”

And as Mac said those last words as he was yelling it inside as he ran into the cottage, as his hooves clashed against the wooden floors of the cottage and went straight for the basement. And so, with that being said, I then looked over to Forrest who was shocked and appalled as his mouth was agape and wasn’t sure how to respond as his some of the blood got onto him and his costume.

And then Neon, who was just standing there with a big ol’ smile across his face, then went towards the dead body and started to eat it. Didn’t cook it, didn’t magically change it into something edible or weird, he just started to eat the dead body raw and everything. He just took a bit ol’ bite out of the old lady’s dead boy. More specifically he took a big bite out of the skull. Funny enough, when the old lady dropped to the ground, all dead and shit, she also dropped the bowl of candy, of course.

The candy went everywhere and you would think Neon would eat the candy instead, but instead, he just went for the corpse. Corpses are nutritious from what I hear. Anyway, as Neon was eating the dead body that was once a living old lady, Forrest saw Neon just eat the corpse with a smile and taking big chunks out and shit and in turn that did it for him. Forrest then started to have a bad feeling in his stomach and quickly turned around and started to puke chunks into a nearby bush that was there by the cottage.

And Forrest just puked and puked as this was all going on. So let’s go over it shall we? Jack just had killed an old lady by bashing her skull in and stealing her stuff, Mac was in the basement doing god knows what, Neon was eating a dead body raw, and Forrest was by the bushes, puking and who knows, he probably wanted to go kill himself afterwards later that night. And as for me, I was just standing there, giving myself a slight sigh.

However, Arrell wasn’t doing anything weird and he came up right next to me after I have a slight sigh and he put his left hoof on my shoulder and said to me with a small smile that to help make me not think about what was happening, “Don’t worry Knight. This happens with us sometimes on Halloween. It’s not so bad…you’ll get used to it.”

Once Arrell was there I had turned my eyes sideways because he was right next to me and everything…you know what I mean, where the pupils go to the right or left if someone is right next to you. Anyways, I also had my left eye brow up as I was a bit unsure of how true Arrell’s words were. But to my surprise, a white cat came out of the house, wondering what was going on and why its owner is dead on the ground being eaten by Neon Party.

And once Arrell laid eyes on that white cat, he then said, “CAAAAAT!”

And he started chasing it around the cottage, inside and out as the cat was spooked by him and started running as well.

And as Arrell was running around, he was saying to the cat, “COME HERE KITTY CAT! I JUST WANT TO DO HORRIBLE EXPERIMENTS ON YOU AND FUCK WITH YA!”

And so, as all this was going on, I could add Arrell to the list as I just stood there and sat on my ass, giving a very cynical look in my eyes and facial expression and gave a big sigh this time, pretty much saying I was tired of it all. It was supposed to be a good, short Halloween special, but instead it wasn’t that.

And so, after I gave a sigh, lots and lots of rats started to come out from the house as Mac, with a big smile on his face, was standing in the doorway, moving his arms up and down, saying, “GO! GO KIDS! BE FREE! YOU ARE FROM APPLEJACK’S CLUTCH OF EVIL! NOTHING TO FEAR FOR MAC IS HERE TO SAVE YOU ALL FROM THAT IS UNHOLY…APPLEJACK!”

And all the rats were colored white, brown, and black. And the whole place was flooded with mice as well.

A FEW MINUTES MORE LATER

So sometime passes by, everyone is doing their shit, and soon everything had calmed down and we were in a little circle as well. And so with that being said, I had told Jack to put the stuff down, especially since his candy bag couldn’t carry it. Neon had done eating the body, Mac had done letting the rats out, Arrell accidentally killed the cat, and Forrest was done puking up loads.

And so I got the guys together in a small circle and then said to everyone, “Ok...so we all know that what you all did was not trick or treating.”

Mac then raised his right arm, as if he was awaiting to be called upon so he could ask a question.

So I said after giving a slight sigh, “yes Mac?”

Mac then responded to me with, “So…what were we doing then?”

I then said, “What the fuck do you think you guys were doing?”

Neon then said, “Liberating an oppressed state that is ran by an illegal Mexican?”

And then suddenly an illegal Mexican showed up, mostly in human form, don’t question it, and said, “Hey seniors…”

Then I quickly took my gun out from the holster that was a part of the costume, because I did put a gun in there. I just forgot about it is all, but it did look good and shit when I tried the costume on for the first time.

But anyways, I shot the illegal Mexican and the dead body fell to the ground and I had an annoyed look on my face as I then quickly turned back to look at Neon and said to him, “No! No! We’re not doing another side thing! We are going to get this special done and over with! Got it!?”

And then Neon said with a smile, “Are you going to eat that dead boy?”

I then gave a slight sigh and closed my eyes and said to Neon, “Knock yourself out.”

And so Neon walked over to the dead illegal Mexican body and started to eat the dead body raw…once more that is…and once Forrest saw it, he said to himself quietly, “I think I’m going to be sick…”

And so Forrest started to puke up green chunks once more. And I then gave another sigh, this time being more obvious.

I then said, “After they are done, we’re moving on to the next house. This time…be careful not to fuck anything up…got it?”

Mac then raised his right arm again and I then said to him, “Mac, this isn’t a class. Unless of course you’re going to ask if Mayo or mustard is an instrument, just speak up.”

Mac then said, “Well before we do go to the next house, I’ve got my Halloween special surprise for you guys on what we are going to do tonight!”

I was then a bit curious and had that kind of curiosity look on my face as well as my left eye brow was raised and I asked Mac, “What do you mean?”

Mac then said, “Well…since you asked…

LATER AT THE EDGES OF EVER FREE FOREST

…we’re going to go to Applejacks farm!”

We were all then standing at the edge of the Everfree Forest, as we got there pretty quickly…you know…since it’s a special after all. And we were all looking deep into the dark forest, wondering what Mac was trying to say to us.

I then asked Mac, as we were all confused, “What do you mean exactly? Because we’re standing at the edge of the Everfree Forest.”

Mac then said as he put his right hoof on my head and ruffled up my mane a bit and said to me with a smile, “Of course I know that you silly goose. What I’m trying to say is that we’re going to go through here fancy smancy forest and sneak up on Applejacks farm. And of course I’ll be in my clever disguise thanks to my lovely Halloween costume that I made myself of course And once we wait until midnight and all is quiet…BAM! We hit Applejack’s farm and show her that we mean it!”

I was still a bit confused and then asked Mac, as everyone else kind of got the message, “Why are we going to do this?”

Mac then said, “Because…we’re friends aren’t we? And aren’t friends supposed to help each other out? I thought since we were all together, we can hit Applejack where it hurts and strike while she isn’t suspecting it! So what do you say guys! Are we going to show Applejack who’s boss or what!?”

And then no one said anything at all. It was just silence except from Forrest; he just gave Mac a slight cough. As for Mac…he was waiting for a response with a smile, but then as soon as he got no answer from us, as we just looked at him with a face showing that we didn’t care, Mac started to get worried a bit. His face turned from having a smile and excited to having a disappointed face.

I then went up to Mac and put my right arm around Mac’s neck and then told him calmly and reasonably, “Look Mac, were not going to do it.”

And then after that, Mac quickly brushed off my arm and had an angry face on while looking pissed and he then asked me, “AND WHY THE HELL NOT?”

I then said to him, “Because…it’s Halloween night, this is a Halloween special, and we need to get it done without complicating things any further. This will only make things complicated I’m sure and we’re not going to do this…got it? So come on, we’ve got more houses to hit tonight before Halloween night is over.”

And then I started to walk away from Mac and the others started to follow suit, but Mac didn’t follow suit and I didn’t even bother to turn my head and look to see if Mac was following us or not.

And as we were walking away, Mac then looked really pissed as he continued to stand there and said to us, “WELL FINE! FUCK YOU ALL TOO! I’LL GO OUT ON MY OWN AND FIGHT APPLEJACK MYSELF! AND WHEN I’M DONE, YOU’RE GOING TO REGRET NOT COMING WITH ME DAMN IT!”

I then said out loud as we were walking away, “WHATEVER YOU SAY DOUCHEBAG”

And Mac from that point on just gave a small, low sound growl from underneath his breath.

TEN MINUTES LATER

And so, with us going on our own, Mac was all by himself. He was walking through the dark woods at night, not walking on a straight forward path or nothing.

He was stepping on fallen leaves from the fall running thingy and was also mumbling to himself with an angered look on his face, saying stuff about how we’re a bunch of pussy ass bitches and that we aren’t friend or some shit. You know…the usual stuff that friends say sometimes behind each other’s backs when they’re angry. But the issue was he was doing it all at night, not saying or giving a comment how spooky and scary it is to be outside late night with the moon out, full and bright and such.

No, instead, Mac was just keeping his head down, still in his so called costume, walking towards Applejack. As he was walking, he could hear owls as well from the distance and all of this was nothing bothering Mac at all whatsoever.

And as Mac kept wondering through the Everfree Forest late at night, Mac then finally said to himself, “Who needs those guys anyway? I can do this perfectly fine on my own…out in this…spooky old forest and all.”

Mac was starting to get scared a little bit. It was a spooky dark forest after all…that was probably filled to the brim with spooks. And as he kept walking deeper and deeper into the Everfree forest, Mac started to hear some noises that he was unsure of if it was just in his own mind or something monstrous was really there. Mac started to turn his head from side to side, having worried looking eyes and wondering if there were creatures out and about, staring at him, spying on him, watching from a distance and waiting to strike and feast upon his tasty flesh.

And as Mac was starting to worry, Mac started to tell himself quietly, “D-Don’t think about it Mac Farmer…e-e-everything is going to be alright. N-no m-m-m-monster is out to scare me or kill me…but it...could be Applejack though…and her apple minions…and family…waiting to kill me. After all the terrible things that I’ve done them…maybe it’s the ghost of the apple family that I killed…m-maybe it isn’t though…get yourself together Mac…everything is going to be a ok.”

And then a low pixilated picture that was a .gif of a ghost that looked like it came from the early internet of the nineties, came out of nowhere and said to Mac softly, “Boo.”

And then Mac jumped up in the air a bit and screamed bloody murder as he ran the other away and screaming for his life as he said, “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

And as Mac ran towards from where he came, Mac accidently fell down a hidden hole that was not seen in years by another living creature. Yup, just out of nowhere as Mac was just running blindly and in the dark late at night. And as Mac fell down this hole, it was down and down and down until it came to a curve and Mac slid down.

All the while as Mac was falling down, he was screaming as usual until he landed and came to a stop after the curve sort of slowed him down a bit. And as he slowed down, he came upon a room…a dark room that was hidden from most ponies for years and not to have been seen in at least two thousands years or so…or something like that…honestly I have no fucking clue where that room came from, but as for where Mac was, it was like a big ol’ cave or some shit. And the only thing lighting it was a hole from the top of this deep, dark cave where the moonlight could shine through it.

And there was a bridge as well, made of old cobblestone and looked like it took centuries to sculpt and build. And across this bright stood a podium that held one, old, dusty, leather bound book. And as he saw it as he stopped screaming. Once he did see it, he was a bit curious as he looked around and wanted to get a closer look of the book.

And so with that being said, Mac got off from his ass that he slid down and started to walk towards the book, in which case he walked to the old bridge in order to do so. And as he was walking, the whole place in scope was pretty big as Mac looked around. He didn’t say a word to himself, but only looked around in amazement as to what kind of place that he was in at the time. And so he walked through the place, he finally got to the podium where the book was being held at. And once Mac got to the book, he took a closer look at it.

It smelled funny as it was ancient, but at the same time it looked mysterious and cool looking as the picture on the front cover of the leather bound book, was that of a jack o’ lantern with a face carved in to it. A simple two eyes, a nose, and a smiling mouse. And with that being said, Mac just became even more curious and so Mac opened up the book with his right hoof and turned to a random page that just so happened to be the page that had some odd words written in it all in red ink too.

It was probably blood but who knows. But anyways, Mac then started to read those words and he said out loud in his usual southern like tone, “To all who reads this, be aware of what you are about to unleash. Know once you finish reading this book, all of the creatures that comes from this book must be defeated one after the other every year on hallows eve before fighting the dark lord that rules all the monsters. And yes, this does not make any sense whatsoever and does not rhyme because we’re fucking lazy. I mean what do you expect, this is the medieval age when we’re writing this…it’s fucking boring as shit and over half of us are retarded with no education…fuck you…”

And after Mac had said those two magical words, a green light emitted from the book, a strong one at that. It was a big, strong source of green light streaming out from the book and shot up straight into the sky and right into the moon, where it probably went straight to the moon and did something to it...maybe or perhaps it was foreshadowing something later to come…or not who the fuck knows.

But the green light was strong and soon wind started to fill the cave as Mac’s mane started to flow like crazy and somehow brown leaves found its way inside the cave as well and those leaves too started to be caught up in the wind and its current. And then thunder could be heard in the distance but yet there were no rain clouds or lightning storm anywhere to be seen, only the sound of crackling thunder indeed.

All of this chaos seemed to have been made once Mac had read from the book that was hidden in a cave for maybe a good reason. And as this was happening, Mac was worried. He even started to look a bit scared as well. I supposed even an idiot filled with envy has a heart of gold…or maybe he just feels emotions like any other pony…except for Neon ninety nine percent of the time. And as the green light that that emitting from the book, soon a burst of green energy shot up into the sky as well and Mac saw all this unfolding before his very eyes. He started to take a few steps back as he was unsure what he had just unleashed and was not sure if he had made a grave mistake.

Maybe, he had thought, that he was going to do die. In fact, Mac was thinking inside his mind, trust me I know, ‘Oh fucking apples! What did I do! Did I release Applejack’s evil shadow pony person!? What’s going to happen? What’s going to happen to my apples? Will I still get to kill Applejack even if the apocalypse happens...maybe….we’ll see…?’

And soon after a minute of this green energy shooting from the magical, ancient book, a dark figure started to arise from within the book and was slowly rising upwards and hovering in mid-air. The figure’s shape was a bit hard for Mac to make out, as Mac started to squint his eyes a little bit to get a better look at the said creature. The creature’s outline took the form of a bi-pedal creature it seemed as it had hands with pointy ends at the end of the hands along with two legs and two pointy feet.

But the head looked a bit weird as it too had a pointy end. And as the figure emerged and became more clear by the second, the figure was standing in an upright position, indicating it was like human, but more slender like and more weird like so it was possibly some sort of weird bi-pedal creature that was standing there. And as soon as the green energy was done emitting from the book, the book closed, but the wind and thunder continued to flow deep into the night. And as the green energy light went, so did the shadowy figure…instead Mac got to see who the shadowy figure was.

And I’m sure in your head or in Mac’s head, dramatic music was playing somewhere in his mind or your minds or some shit as this moment of reveal. I mean I’m sure Mac was thinking of it…what else would he be thinking of? The consequences of his actions…probably not. But anyways, Mac was standing there with wide eyes and filled with curiosity as to what he had just unleashed and there standing before him was a bi-pedal creature of some sort. Of course Mac didn’t really know what that was…he lived on a farm for his whole life after all.

And the shadowy figure was revealed to be sort of like a green goblin of some kind. The green goblin’s look was mostly black. From his neck to his feet, it was all dressed in black. Weather it was black clothing or just a bunch of shadows…no one really knew, not even I knew this one…I know you’re all very disappointed by that lack of information.

Shoot me a river and cry mother fucker.

But the head was that of like a goblin almost where the top of the skull was elongated a bit, but had a pointy end and he also had pointy ears and big blue eyes as well. He even had a big, weird noise and to top it all off, he had pointy, sharp teeth located in his mouth…at least the front teeth that is. I’m sure the rest were normal teeth that would be fit for an herbivore or a carnivore. But for Mac, this was astounding as he had never really seen anything like it before…like I said, been living on the farm his entire life and usually farm people don’t get to see the bi city stuff too often.

I mean whenever farmers get a chance to look at their pigs, they get a hard on pretty quickly. And with that being said, Mac started to inch forwards every few seconds as his eyes were wide and filled with wonder like a child. Like a child discovering what a pedophile looks like for the first time.

Mac was being kept in the shadows as he had backed up when the light was being emitted from the book, but now he was slowly coming towards the light and as soon as he got close enough to get a good detailed look at the goblin before him, he also got to see the goblin had a smirk upon his face, as if he had confidence and knew he was some kind of bad ass…but not really though because he looks like pansy of some kind.

Anyways, Mac slowly got closer to the light and as he did, the green goblin looking fella raised both of his arms up and said in his weird, sounding voice that was a bit too high pitched for his look, “IT IS ME! THE LORD OF HALLOWEEN MADNESS! THE KING OF HALLOWEEN CHAOS! THE MASTER OF ALL THE CRRATURES OF THE NIGHT DURING HALLOWEEN AND ON ALL HALLOWS EVE! WHO HAS SUMMONED ME AND RELEASED ME FROM MY PRISON!? STEP FORTH, AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE A REWARD IF YOU DO NOT RESIST MY POWERS!”

And then Mac came into the light…he didn’t find Jesus…he just found the light. Jesus is somewhere else and will probably touch you in the no-no place if you do find him and get too close to him.

Well as Mac came into the light, he then said in his southern tone, “It’s me! I released you! Are you one of those fancy genies that I’ve been hearing all about lately?”

The green goblin was looking around to see if it was in front of him, but he was floating in mid-air, so he had to look down. When he saw a talking Technicolor pony, he had a confused look on his face as he was not expecting for a pony, especially a little pony, to be releasing some sort of ancient evil creature or some shit. And as Mac was asking his question, Mac had one of his eye brows raised as he was confused as well and thought it was a genie.

However once the green goblin saw him, he went down more towards Mac’s level and got close to him, still over towering him, but was closer to the ground from before and asked him, “Who are you?”

Mac then said with a confident smile on his face, “The name is Mac Farmer! So…for my first wish…I want my dick to be three times big as it is…that’ll show Applejack who has the penis around these here parts…he he…”

The green goblin was confused at first and continued to have a confused look on his face, but he then wiped that silly little look on his face and replaced it with a more confident, angry, determined look instead and said, “NO YOU FUCKING IMBECIL! I’M NOT A GAY ASS GENIE! I AM…THE KING OF HALLOWEEN!”

And as the green goblin looking thing said that, he had closed his eyes, raised both of his arms up once more as thunder and wind came in for effect, all the while him having a grin on his face. But Mac wasn’t paying attention and soon when Mac started speaking to him again, the green goblin opened his eyes and had that look when someone interrupts you rudely, but are also confused by it as well.

Mac then said to the green goblin, “And for my second wish…I want to ride to be able to have three balls instead of the usual two. That way…when I get to Applebloom and her…”

The green goblin was then annoyed by Mac’s rude behavior and he then closed his eyes and got close to him and yelled, “SILENCE!”

Went the green goblin looking thing yelled towards him; his yell was a bit powerful to where Macs mane and some of his skin blew a bit backwards.

And then after the green goblin looking thing was done yelling, he then asked Mac a very serious question in a serious tone with an angered look on his face and asked, “Do you even know who I am…whatever you are?”

Mac then said with a straight face, “No.”

The Green Goblin then said as he had a bit of a confused look on his face as he too raised sort of an eyebrow and got close to Mac’s face and asked, “The king of Halloween? The master that controls all monster of the night? The lord of all hallows eve?”

Mac then said again with a straight face, “No.”

The Green Goblin looking thing then said, “Then how about my other name………Cl…arence….larence….have you even heard of that name before?”

The green goblin looking thing had said his other name, Clarence, as if he was a bit embarrassed to say it. And to be fair, it is a pretty embarrassing name…ha ha ha…whoever poor soul gets that name is sure fucked for life. Ha ha ha…what a maroon Clarence’s are.

Anyways, Clarence was awaiting a yes answer from Mac but Mac then said with a straight face once more, “No.”

After Mac gave his third and final no, Clarence was frustrated and he then asked himself, “NOT EVEN CLARENCE!? OH COME ON!? HOW COME NO ONE KNOWS OF MY GREAT AND POWERFUL RULING!? DOES ANYONE EVEN REMEMBER WHO I AM ANYMORE!?”

Mac then took a few seconds and then answered the rhetorical question with, “No.”

He even said it was a straight face...again. And with that being said, Clarence then looked down towards Mac and started to wonder about why he was a pony as well. He had seen ponies back his day, but at the same time, not by much.

So Clarence got even closer to Mac and asked him, “You…pony thing…Mac…isn’t it?”

Mac then nodded his head in response. Clarence then asked Mac, “Tell me…what has happened in my 2,000 years of absence in this…world of yours?”

As he was saying that, Clarence pulled Mac by is back tail and was being held on to by Clarence only by his back tail and was being hung upside down as well as Clarence lifted him up into the air and sort of tried to make it eye level with him. Although it wasn’t quite eye level, it was still below Clarence’s chin. And Mac had no problem with this whatsoever.

And Mac responded with, “Oh I don’t know about history. I failed History class when I was in kindergarten. Teacher thought I was retarded…but I showed her what’s for…I killed her dog…and then she committed suicide after. Sure showed her. Besides…what they teach in the history books is all lies and the secret shadow government that is being run by apples has re-written the history books. Everypony else thinks I’m crazy...but I’m not. Instead…they’re the ones that are crazy. The real history of Equestria involved a block of cheese, giant cows from outer space, and me time traveling back in time to defeat the evil cows from outer space and to relinquish the evil empire of the apples that also went back in time, and ending it with me restoring the timeline and giving peace throughout all the lands…while also selflessly giving the power to Princess Celestia and Princess Luna to make sure the apples never harm anypony else ever again. But instead the secret shadow governments of apples have everypony fooled. WELL I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED DAMN IT! IT’S ALL LIES BY THE GOVERNMENT TO KEEP US SUPPRESSED AND I WILL ONE DAY FREE THEM OF THEIR ARROGANCE AND WAKE THESE PONIES UP DAMN IT!”

Clarence then just had a disappointing frown form across his face, as if he too was starting to become cynical like I was. And then Clarence opened his mouth as big as he could as he spoke his next words and yelled those words like before with such force that it caused Mac’s mane to move a bit as well as his skin a bit.

Clarence yelled at Mac’s face, “NOT THAT YOU FUCKING IMBECILE!”

Mac then said in response, “Well that’s rude…”

And then Clarence threw Mac back down on the ground and Mac just landed on his back on the cold, hard cobblestone with a thud. It kind of hurt him a bit, but he was an earth pony after all and he got right back up on his four hooves and then raised an eyebrow towards Clarence, a bit confused as to what he meant…because he doesn’t know no fancy smancy history…he’s a farmer after all.

Anyways, Clarence then asked Mac while looking down towards Mac and still floating in the air while also giving him a cold stare as well as having his arms down by his side, “Let me ask you this…little pony…are all the creatures running around, causing havoc and chaos on the weak?”

Mac then continued to raise his eye brow, but then put it back down and said again with a straight face, “No.”

And then Mac’s expression turned into a calm, relaxed state one and started to explain to Clarence, “Most ponies are happy, and they live in harmony or some shit…something to do with friendship and making friends with every creature and something something rainbows and sunshine and bullshit like that. Honestly I don’t go with this so called friendship trend, I think it’s just a fad and it’ll die out within the year or two…and I’m sure it will happen because I’ve been telling that to other ponies for the past ten or so years and they are going to be sure sorry that they didn’t believe me, let me tell ya. I mean, this whole friendship fad thing isn’t really going to go anywhere. Now let me tell you what is going to take off…pogs…or at least that’s what the kids these days call them. I don’t really know what these so called pogs things are…but apparently some kids found them out in the woods or some shit…honestly…kids these days..Am I right there Clarence?”

While Mac was talking out loud after he had explained the part where most ponies live in friendship and harmony, Clarence had turned his back sort of and started to talk to himself quietly, completely ignoring what Mac was talking about from that point forward so with what Mac had said, it was completely useless.

With what Clarence was saying to himself while Mac was babbling on with whatever he was saying, “So it’s no longer the age of chaos and havoc huh? And Ponies roam the lands as well? That’s odd…clearly I have been gone for a long time…and clearly these ponies have over stayed their welcome.”

And then when Mac asked Clarence a question, Clarence turned his attention back towards Mac and his answer was, “Oh yeah…sure…whatever you say…little pony…thing….”

Mac then said, “Hey! I’m talking to you and you don’t listen to me…maybe you are working with Applejack!”

Clarence then gave a sigh and then said to Mac, “Go away pony…can’t you see I’m busy here. I’m trying to plot on how to create chaos and bring this land back down to its former, glorious self. Don’t you have a place to be with your so called friendship?”

Mac then started to have a bit of a sad face on and he said in his usual southern accent tone, “Well no. My friends left me alone in the woods on my own.” Clarence then had sort of big eyes, as he had realized that Mac just said in a way he didn’t have friends. But he needed it to be clarified to him so Clarence then looked towards Mac and got closer to him and he asked Mac, “Your friends abandoned you huh?”

Mac then started to have an angry face on and said, “Yeah…and we were going to wreck Applejack’s farm and show her what’s for you know. But then they didn’t want to do it and left me on my own. Those fuckers.”

Clarence then started to get an idea…a naughty idea in his head as a big grin started to form around his face and a slight chuckle escaped from his mouth.

Clarence then said, “Say there…pony…Mac…was it? What do you say you and I team up and…have ourselves some fun tonight on this Halloween night huh? You still need to be rewarded for setting me free…right?”

Mac then thought it over in his head for a few seconds and he then asked, “Can we go and destroy Applejack’s farm tonight?”

Clarence then said “Sure…but one thing…do you know a place where I can send spirits and fifth dimensional spirits into physical objects so they can take over and help us have fun tonight?”

Mac then said with a big smile on his face, “Sure do!”

Clarence then stopped floating in mid air and stood firmly on the cobblestone ground on his own two feet and looked down towards Mac, as he towered the average pony…although if you were to stack three ponies tall, it would sort of equal Clarence’s height.

But anyways, as Clarence got on the ground, he then said with his grin still on his face, “Then little pony…you and I are going to get along just fine…he he he…”

Mac then said, but with a concerned look on his face as he was dancing a little bit on his two back hives, going up and down, “Yeah...but before we go, I got to go to the bathroom. I’ve been holding it in ever since the special started.”

And then Mac ran off in the opposite direction where Clarence was standing and went to go and use the bathroom or some shit like that and Clarence then said as Mac ran off and gave a slight sigh, “Fine…BUT HURRY IT UP BEFORE HE CUTS TO COMMERCIAL BREA…

HEY UH KIDS! IT’S ME…WACKO THE CLOOOOOOOOWN!!! I’m your good ol’ buddy wacko here to tell you about that I’m coming TO YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! That’s right there kiddos…I’m coming to you to do stuff! What kind of stuff!? BREAKING INTO YOUR HOME! That’s right kids! I’m going to go into your home late in the middle of the night…JUST FOR YOU! I’m going to have some fun with you kids alright… ha ha…we’re going to play some games like who can catch the knives in their mouth first, stick the fork in the electrical outlet, and every kids favorite game, kill mommy and daddy with a shotgun so no evidence gets traced back to me…WACKO THE CLOWN!!! And don’t worry their kiddos, after you kill your mommy and daddy in their sleep, I’m going to steal everything that you have. EVERYTHING THAT YOU EVER OWNED! And if you have a pet dog or cat…I’M GOING TO SKIN THEM ALIVE!!! HA HA HA HA HA WACKO THE CLOWN! WACKO THE CLOWN! WACKO THE CLOWN! And don’t forget kids, when the cops come and question you, be very quiet and tell them Wacko the Clown is innocent. Shhhhhhhhhhh… And also remember to resist the police at all time. FUCK THE POLICE! And always remember that the authorities are always lying to you and that the Catholic Church is holding you back…so you should leave god and Jesus…AND JOIN THE CHURCH OF WACKO THE CLOWN! WACKO THE CLOWN! WACKO THE CLOWN! HA HA HA HA HA HA…. And after you leave your house in the middle of the night….don’t forget...look at the moon….look at the moon lookatthemon. Lookatthemoon! Lookatthemoon!! LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON LOOKATTHEMOON!!!

After a hard day’s work…and when the sun is setting…you just want to sit back on your front porch and relax with some good ol’ fashioned crack cocaine. But most crack companies never get that good ol’ fashioned crack cocaine like your father had and your father’s father. Well at Jack Black’s Crack, we take our crack cocaine very seriously. We grow the crack cocaine plant naturally and take good care of the people who harvest it. Good crack is done right when it’s handled with love and care. And we only pick the finest of all the crack cocaine plants and produce it in our lovely factory in a random house located somewhere in a beat down neighborhood in Detroit…but don’t tell the police that. And once the crack has been produced by the finest of all illegal immigration, we ship it off to your local stores so you can support them and support your community. And we don’t stop just there…but we also give to local charities and help out communities grow and prosper. And if you don’t believe us…ask the man himself…Jack black…

While Jack black is eating a cookie… “This is some good shit right here…”

Jack Black’s Crack. Made from all natural crack cocaine plants. Better than our competitors. A Brand that you can trust…

COMING THIS FALL ON NBC…IT’S COP/DETEIVE SHOW #556636502!!! THAT’S RIGHT, DON’T G ET ENOUGH COP/DETEIVE SHOWS WHERE VERY EPISODE STARTS OUT WITH A MURDER MYSTREY AND BY THE END IT’S SOLVED! WELL HERE’S ANOTHER ONE. THIS TIME WE PAIR UP A LADY COP, A CHCIKEN, AND A GOLDFISH! AND THEY ALL LIVE SECRET LVIES AT A PIZZA SHOP! WOAH! ISN’T THAT CRAZY AND WILL GIVE CONFLICT TO THE REST OF THE SHOW OF ITS ONE SEASON RUN!? AND DON’T FORGET THE OVER DRAMTIC SCNEES THAT ARE TOTALLY UNNCESSARY AS WELL THAT NO ONE IS GOING TO GIVE A FALMING FUCK ABOUT! IT’S NBC’S COP/DETECTIVE SHOW #5155251625, Sundays at 9!!!

HEY YOU! YEAH YOU! FUCK YOU! YOU WANT TO SUE SOMEONE!? I’LL SUE THEM FOR YOU! MY NAME’S DAN! AND I’M THE BEST LAWYER IN FUCKING TOWN! HIRE ME IF YOU WANT TO SUE SOMEONE! GOT A PROBLEM WITH YOUR BOSS!? WE’LL SUE HIM TOGETHER! GOT BAD GRADES ON A TEST AND IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!? I’LL SUE THAT FUCKING TEACHER STRAIGHT TO HELL! THE LIBRIAN IS STILL ALIVE EVEN THOUGH IT’S THE CURRENT YEAR!? I‘LL SUE THAT BITCH TLL SHE IS DEAD! I’LL EVEN SUE YOU MOTHER FUCKER! I’LL SUE YOUR DAD! I’LL SUE YOUR MOM WHILE FUCKING HER IN THE ASS AGAINIST HER OWN WILL! DON’T WORRY…I ALWAYS USE BUTTER! I’LL SUE YOUR PETS! I’LL SUE YOUR FUCKING DAMN TOWN! I’LL SUE THE COUNTRY! I’LL SUE THE WORLD! I’LL SUE THE ENTIRE UNIVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRSE! SO COME DOWN RIGHT NOW! DOWN STRAIGHT TO MY OFFICE LOCATED IN THE BASMENT OF A SHADY CHINESSE RESTURANT! OR ELSE I’LL SUE YOUR FUCKING ASS! DO IT NOW YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!!

LATER AT MAC’S FARM

And so we cut back sometime later after Mac had to go to the bathroom and shit. Honestly nothing much happened other than Mac went to the bathroom, Clarence helped Mac get out of that cave thingy, and they were walking through the woods and shit. Eventually they got back into Stalia territory and they were headed towards Mac’s farm, although Clarence didn’t know that yet as Mac was leading the way.

But as they were walking, they were walking by themselves and having a conversation with each other.

Clarence said to Mac, while raising his arms up for effect “Soon by the end of tonight, all shall bow down to me as their ruler of the night and all hallows eve shall reign for all of eternity!”

Mac then said, “I don’t know there Clarence…that doesn’t sound like a good motivation.”

Clarence then had a confused look on his face as he was walking and had one of his imaginary eye brows raised up and asked Mac, “What do you mean it isn’t a good motivation. It’s entirely plausible.”

Mac then explained to Clarence, “No no no…you need a good motivation when the authorities come for you. Like I said the secret shadow government is in control, and in order to subvert them that you didn’t do the crime…you’ve got to say you had a good, believable, understandable motivation that would be completely legal in the city of Stalia, but not necessarily legal in the country of Equestria…trust me I know it all every time I try and murder Applejack.”

Clarence then said, “Wait…what!? That doesn’t even make any sense!”

As Clarence was saying that to Mac, he was making simple hand gestures and moving it around to show to Mac, who was also looking behind himself every now and then while walking forward, that with what Mac said is completely absurd.

Mac then said with a cool looking smile on his face, “That’s exactly the point there Clarence…you need to subvert the authorities so you can commit the crime again. By the way…that’s a weird name for a weird looking fella like ya…Clarence. Not even a pony name...I think it’s one of those fancy smancy dragon names though.”

Clarence then put his hands towards his face and gave one, big, long sigh in frustration and said to make while putting his arms outwards, “I’m not even a fucking pony you fucking idiot! I told you this before so many times as we were walking and somehow you still don’t get I’m not one of these friendship, rainbow, pony things!? Are you some kind of a moron!?”

Mac then said calmly and simply, “Now Clarence…you can take that tone with me outside my farm…but when get to my farm you need to learn some manners…it is how we do it on the farm after all.”

Clarence then said with a disappointing look on his face, “You are a moron…well at least you’re taking me to…wait what!?”

Clarence then had a surprised look on his face because he just realized the farm part that Mac had mentioned towards him.

Clarence then asked Mac, “We’re going to a farm to release the spirits of the fifth dimension and to take form!?”

Mac then said to Clarence, “Wha?”

Clarence then said, “I thought we were going to a graveyard or an old church or something…something with statues and figurines…or at least a fucking pumpkin patch so I can make a great pumpkin or some shit to kill ponies! But instead we’re going to a fucking farm!?”

Mac then said to Clarence, “Sir…I don’t know what you’re saying…probably because you speaking that fancy college talk that I’ve been hearing about lately. Pfft…college…what pony came up with that idea…am I right there Clarence? Say, I’m starting to get sick of that name…we should give a new name if you’re going to be hanging out with me…and I have standards. Hmmmm…maybe we should give you the name of Dark Apple Slayer…..yeah...now that’s a name that will get Applejack running for sure. But between you and me…we’re just keep it short to Das. Does that sound cool with you…Das?”

Das then said with putting his hand towards his face again and tipping his head upwards and yelling out loud, “FUCK MY LIIIIIIIIIIFE!!!”

Mac then said, “Then it’s settled…Das…das good to know…”

And so both Mac and Das continued to walk for a few more minutes, with Mac being happy and having a smile on his face because he had found a new friend to help him kill Applejack and Das was walking with his arms down and his eyes half open because he just felt like he wanted to give up. He thought he had a chance at conquering the night for himself and his creatures, but instead he got unlucky and the pony who was helping him was an idiot. In other words, it was not going so good for Das.

But then they got to Mac’s farm and Mac said with a confident smile, “We’re here!”

And once they got there and they stopped in front of Mac’s vast fields of poorly taken care of Apple trees, Das opened his eyes big and wide and then started to take a good look around himself. He saw many, red, tasty looking apples up in the trees, and at first, Das thought it was useless by this point to even try to continue on with life and would be better to put a gun to his head and pull the trigger, but then he started to give it a second thought.

He just needed an inanimate object to release the spirits of the fifth dimension into, and the rest would take form, so as Das put his right hand to his chin and started to move it back and forth and think about what was before him, Mac was smiling away and said to Das, “So…what do you think? Do I have the best apples in Equestria or don’t I have the best apples in Equestria? And if you say no…I’ll have to kill ya.”

Das then said, “Well…it’s not completely dog shit…”

Mac then jumped in the air with a smile and said, “I KNEW IT! THAT’S ONE POINT FOR ME! SOON I’LL HAVE ENOUGH POINTS TO KILL APPLEJACK…or at least I think I can kill Applejack with points. Or was I just drunk that one time?”

Das then got closer to the ground by bending his knees and asked Mac, “Are all of these apples yours?”

Mac then said with a smile and raised his right arms and moved it while pointing it at the apples and said, “Yes it is. I grew all of this myself…while also adding a special ingredient to the mix as well. Family secret. So…are these apples good enough for…whatever you’re going to do…that will involve killing applejack I hope…”

Das then looked around one more time and then after a few seconds more to think, Das then came to the conclusion and said to Mac, “Yes…yes it will be.”

Das then had a small grin form on his face as he was about to unleash chaos and havoc in the world. And then, Das outstretched his arms with the palm of his hands towards the sky ad soon a burst of green energy came out of both hands and went into the sky, which then tore open and made a big ol’ hole in the sky that had sort of like a green, vortex, portal looking thing, that then unleashed the spirits from the fifth dimension into the world of Equestria. As for what the spirits from the fifth dimension looked like…it looked like just green ghosts with a bit of a creepiness factor added to them.

And soon spirits from the fifth dimension started pouring out like water and into Mac’s farm where they then started possessing Mac’s apples. Now you would think it would just be the apple and that’s it…but they did a little bit more than just take over an Apple. No…instead they grew in sizes varying from big to small.

All the apples grew legs that were like tree branches as they jumped off the tree. And then there was one giant apple that was made from one of the big spirits from the fifth dimension. They also had a mouth, a nose, and two eyes, sort of what you would see on a jack o’ lantern of sorts. And instead of pure darkness in their mouths and eyes, it was an evil green glow emitting from inside the apples as well. And both Mac and Das saw this all unfold before them Das had a creepy smile on his face, as his plan of coming back from over two thousand years was all coming together, But for Mac, he just sat there with a smile on his face, happy to see progress being made to kill Applejack.

I know…he has a problem. But what can you do about it? Soon, the spirits from the fifth dimension stopped pouring out and then the hole closed up, and Das stopped stretching his arms out.

Das then looked upon his army of evil, red apples and said to them all, “GO OUT MY MINIONS AND OUT ON TO THE STREETS! SHOW NO MERCY TO THOSE WHO RESIST OUR POWERS OF THE NIGHT! GO FORTH AND BURN EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND! TONIGHT…WE TAKE BACK WHAT IS OURS!”

And so the army of the red apples marched on into Stalia, and Mac had no problem with this whatsoever. But Mac then looked up towards Das and he then asked him, with a small smile on his face, “So, what do we do now Das?”

Das then snapped his fingers and then the giant apple that I had mentioned a bit earlier came towards them all the while Das having a pretty confident smile on his face. He was contempt with what he was doing after all and was sure his plans would come together.

Anyways, Das then lifted himself up by floating in mid air, but also magically did the same for Mac and put himself and Mac on top of the giant apple that looked like a fat retard and said to Mac, “Little pony…let’s say we have some fun and watch the fireworks.”

Mac then said with a smile as he was getting comfy on the giant apple and still in his shitty costume like always, “That sounds like fun!”

Das then said in a calm, cool tone, “Sure it does little pony…sure it does…”

And then Das and Mac were off to wreck havoc across the land.

BACK IN STALIA

Ok so while Mac was doing his thing, me and the guys…we were still out and about trick or treating. Most of the kids had gone and shit and we were left with maybe an hour or two to reap in the candy that was left over. We had already stopped by a few houses prior, but it was just as bad as the first time we tried trick or treating at that cottage.

So after several attempts, and talking to the guys, this was our next try and to attempt to hopefully get it right when it comes to trick or treating. So we were in the middle of Stalia, barely any kids nearby, and it was a two story building of sorts.

So we were all at the door, huddling close so we can be seen as a group that wanted candy and right before I knocked on the door, I then said everyone to the guys, “Alright…so we have the right idea on how to trick or treat…right? We don’t eat the dead bodies if they are there. We don’t go chasing their pets. And we don’t go bashing in their skulls with a lead iron pipe. Am I clear on this with you guys?”

Then all the guys nodded their head sin response. I then said, “Alright...let’s try this for the thirteenth time…and let’s get it right.”

And then I raised my right hoof and gave three hard knocks on the door. And then a few seconds passed and the door opened up to an old stallion that looked kind and gentle and wouldn’t hurt a single fly. And as we were about to say trick or treat, Jack quickly put the lead iron pipe in his mouth, and started to break the old stallion’s legs.

He bashed the old stallion’s legs in several times, breaking every bone and crippling him until he was six feet under in the future. And as the old stallion’s legs were being broken, he was screaming in pain as much as he could and there was some blood coming out as well, as one of the bones broke through the skin and started spurting out blood. And once Jack was finished, he put the lead iron pip down and smiled towards me. I for one just gave out a sigh and closed my eyes while putting my left hoof over my eyes in frustration, but I didn’t have any other facial expression on my face because honestly, what did I expect from these guys?

But I didn’t need to say a single word as Jack then responded to me with, “What? At least I didn’t cut off their faces like last time and give it to Neon to put in his face collection.”

Neon then said out loud with his usual creepy smile, “I have a rare collection of pony faces that I keep in my closet. My favorite one is the zebra one.”

And then we started to hear screams of terror coming from the distance. And we all turned ourselves around to see what was happening. And what we saw was the whole town of Stalia being caught on fire along with other ponies running and creaming in terror as kids burned to a burnt and smelly crisp in the distance. All the while evil monster apples were terrorizing the town and doing weird things like eating ponies, mutilating ponies, and shooting out green energy from their mouths that was like a green energy beam that incinerated anything that it touched.

And we were all standing, watching this with our own eyes and I then asked, “What the fuck is going on here?”

We were all a bit surprised by it…except for Neon of course. As for the old stallion, he just laid there, hoping to die soon and swiftly. But as for us, we were sort of stunned by what was happening…until we saw the giant apple walking towards us.

And as the giant apple was walking towards us, Mac was jumping up and down and waving towards us with a smile and was yelling towards us, “HI GUYS! LOOK AT ME! I’M ON A GIANT APPLE AND ON MY WAY TO KILL APPLEJACK!”

I then said while still having wide eyes, “Mac?...”

However, the giant apple didn’t stop as Das was in command and didn’t seem to care too much or notice us at all.

In fact, all Das said as the giant apple passed us up and we were following it with our wide eyes, “Come on little pony…let’s burn this town to the ground!”

And Mac said as he was being dragged along in the distance by Das, “I LIKE BURNING THINGS! YAAAAAAAAAAAY!”

And then I stopped having wide eyes while the rest of the guys continued to have wide eyes and I gave a loud sigh and said to myself as the town was burning behind me in red flames and yellow flames, “Or course Mac had something to do with this.”

Arrell then liked towards me and asked as I turned around and looked towards him, “So what do we do now?”

I then said to Arrell, “Well considering this is a special…I suppose this is the special part. But to be honest, I don’t want to drag TK into this or make this any more complicated than it has to be so let’s just cut right to the chase. We need to get together as a team, make a plan on how we’re going to defeat that green goblin looking thing that was on the giant apple, and save Halloween night from being taken over…by that green goblin looking thing.”

Jack then asked me, “Is that it?”

I then turned to him and said, “Do you really want to draw this out more than it needs to be?”

Jack then was silent for a few seconds and he then said to me, “Maybe.”

I then gave a sigh and I then said, “Let’s just get this over with. Although we are going to have to get a sixth member in our group since Mac is gone.”

I then looked at the old stallion that Jack had beat up and he was still barely alive. So I looked towards the other guys and asked them, “How do you all feel about having a cripple in the group?”

It would make us look diverse…but I wasn’t sure…it is a cripple after all and If I know anything about watching movies and TV shows that had cripples in it…they are expandable.

And then Wolf, still in his ghost costume, came out from what seemed like out of nowhere and said to me, “I’ll join you guys and help fight this evil menace.”

Wolf had said it in like in a heroic tone as well. I then asked Wolf while having one of my eye brows raised as I was a bit curious, “Really? You want to help? But you don’t do anything? Usually you’re too lazy and just go back home, get high, and when I come home you’re passed out drunk while Molestia is raping you.”

Wolf then said, still in a heroic tone in his voice, “Yes…and I would be doing that to. But the apples ruined my chance to get some of that sweet fucking mare ass! And they shall pay the price for it!”

And so, with that being said, we just stood there for a few seconds in silence for the most part, as the fire was crackling in the background, slowly burning the town of Stalia away to ashes. And then after a few seconds, I then said with a straight face because by this point, I was ready to get the special over with, “Ok then.”

BACK AT MY HOUSE

And so we were back at my house, the library, which thankfully was not being burned to ashes like the rest of Stalia was. Although in the background, the whole town was burning and you could see that simply looking through my windows. Anyways, we were all in the living room area and everyone was on the couch or recliner while I was the one standing up and Wolf was standing right beside me as well…in a lazy kind of way that is.

Anyways, I then said to the group, while still in our costumes oddly enough, “Alright. So here’s what’s going on and what the plan is. From what I can tell, after we left Mac at the edge of the Everfree forest, Mac did something to fuck up our night and so we now have to deal with this kind of special instead of a special where it’s laid back and relax. So obviously we need to get this special done as fast as we can. I would say we should half ass it, but if we do, then we’re going to get a lot of angry mail in…and I’ve already got enough of that already. So we’re going to put some effort into this at least. What we’re going to do is you guys are going to go to the graveyard and be ready to battle out the evil monster apples while I go and find the giant apple and talk to that green goblin looking thing and challenge him to a fight at the graveyard. Now…since this is a special, we also need to bring something clever in or at least something people that watch this special is going to think that is clever, so Forrest, it’s up to you to go and find that Hitler Nugget thingy and convince him to help us.”

Forest then had a shock ad surprised face with wide eyes and then started to look scared as his face did show that and said to me, “Me!? Why me!? Why can’t we get someone else like those three little kids to help us that hang around us sometimes?”

I then said to Forrest, “Mac locked them up…remember...with a pedophile…”

Forrest then rolled his eyes back and thought about it and he then said in a disappointing tone, “Oh yeah…I forgot. But…do we really have to? Can’t we just use your half assed plan idea? What if the Hitler Nugget beats me up, takes my lunch money, and puts me in the oven? Aren’t you guys concerned about my well-being as a pony?”

And then there was a few seconds of silence amongst us until I said to Forest, “Forest, you know no one cares if you get thrown into the oven or not. Besides, the half assed plan was to do a montage of us fighting the apples and then explain nothing afterwards and just say the day was saved…so basically lazily describing it. But I have had enough bricks thrown through my window for once so I’m going to say no and just put some effort into it. That’ll keep the audience happy for a few minutes…until they realize they wasted their lives on something and regret it.”

Forrest then said with a sigh and a frown on his face, “Fine…I’ll go find the Nazi Nuggets then.”

And as for Wolf, he then said out loud, “So are we supposed to get weapons to fight the apples or what?”

I then said, “Well like no shit dumbass…unless you want to fight them with your hooves...or…paws…you guys are going to need something. For me I have my handy dandy gun that I can use. Jack has his lead iron pipe. Neon is…well he’s Neon. Arrell could probably use a big ol’ tree branch or something in the graveyard. And Forrest...well no one cares about him. As for you Wolf…well do you have anything?”

Wolf then said what appeared to have been a smile underneath and said happily, “Well I’m glad you asked Knight. Yes…yes I do have a weapon…its right here,”

Wolf then went into the kitchen and dragged out a big ol’ wooden cross and brought it into the living room area.

And at first I had a confused look on my face and asked Wolf, “You’re going to fight them off with a giant wooden cross?”

Wolf then said to me, “Pfft…no. This is clearly a lower case T of course. And the idea is that I set this lower case T on fire, put it up right into the ground, and that way, those evil apples are really going to be scared. I mean who isn’t afraid of a burning, lower case wooden T?”

I then asked Wolf, “How long have you been having that in the kitchen?”

Wolf then said to me, “Ever since I started making this costume three months ago.”

I then gave a few seconds of silence to take it all in until I said, “Uh…huh…well…we all know what the plan is? Well…let’s move out…so we can get this fucking Halloween special over with already. Damn…fucking director…”

And so we all moved out and did our thing…

AT THE GRAVEYARD

While I was off doing my thing to find the giant apple, they finally made it to the graveyard after about roughly a few minutes of walking there, getting around the fire that is burning Equestria, and all the evil apples roaming about of course.

And yes, Stalia has a graveyard, go figure, but it was a bit of a ways off from the town so the fire was merely but a small glow in the distance so the stars and the full moon were still king of the sky at that point. And in a way, it was kind of creepy that graveyard. Being away from the town and such. Especially late at night and all you hear is the silence or that chirping of a cricket, in being in a place filled with dead ponies that were once alive that you may or may not have known in the first place…it was quite the site to see and place to experience. But anyways, the guys got there, entered through the iron gate and once they made it to the graveyard, they looked around.

All around were scattered tombstones of various sizes along with a few dead trees that had lost all their leaves and branches. And again…the atmosphere was sort of creepy. But the guys didn’t mind it by now, it was standard to be somewhat in a creepy place…they had Neon after all and he was just smiling…possibly at the many victims he had killed over the years, but that is only merely speculation on my part.

Anyways, the guys got there and Arrell said to the group, “Alright then, we’re here…so now what do we do?”

Jack then said, “I guess just sit back and wait for Knight to come and just be ready to fight.”

Wolf, who was still dragging his lower case wooden T along with him, then said, “That sounds good, I’m going to find a place to put this lower case wooden T and douse it with gasoline. If anypony wants to help me, you’re welcomed to.”

And so Wolf went on his own in the graveyard to find a spot for his lower case wooden T.

Sad to say, no one helped him at all. But I suppose…the timber wolf could do it on his own…that timber wolf that could…anyways, Forrest then asked, “But how am I supposed to find those Nazi Nuggets? I don’t even know where to begin?”

Arrell then said while shrugging Forrest off, “I don’t know...but you better find him quick or we’re fucked...so no pressure.”

And then the guys went their own separate ways, going to lay back and wait at the graveyard for my return…all except for Forrest. He was nervous and had that sweaty, nervous look on his face…until he spotted something in the distance. He had to squint his eyes a little bit, but once he did, he spotted something that looked familiar to him.

And then Neon came up right behind him and said out loud, “Eye spy with my little eye a Nazi!”

And then Forrest quietly asked himself, “Is Hitler…crying?”

And then Forrest, with a worried look on his face, went up to the Hitler nugget. As Forrest got closer, the Hitler Nugget was sitting on top of a typical tombstone as he was sad and depressed, putting both of his tiny hands on his face as there were dead Nazi Nugget bodies around, as if they were torn to shreds. When Forrest got there, the Hitler Nugget didn’t say a word to him and just paid attention to himself and his thoughts.

But Forrest was starting to feel bad for the little guy and he sat right next to the Hitler Nugget and looked right next to him and asked nicely, “Hey there little guy…what’s wrong?”

The Hitler Nugget then said in a sarcastic, cynical tone like myself, “Oh what the hell do you want red creature? Come to gloat in my embarrassing defeat as a leader?”

And out of nowhere, a damaged Nazi Nugget Solider was crawling on the ground with one eye, one leg, and a right arm only, saying to his fuehrer, “Please…someone kill me.”

The Hitler Nugget then looked down at the Nazi Nugget solider and said to him cynically, “Oh shut up George. I know you were working with the juice behind my back.”

Forrest then tried to carry on the conversation and asked the Hitler Nugget, “I’m not here to gloat you silly goose. I’m just here to ask what’s wrong and about your feelings?”

The Hitler Nugget wanted to continue to be angry at the world, but instead he gave a small sigh and said back in his tiny voice to Forrest, “Oh…it’s Stalin and his red army. They lured us back to their base and killed all my men…even the Nazi Nugget General, may his soul rest in peace, now I’m all alone and the rest of my men are far away. But the worst part though is that I was made a fool of by Stalin and his Red Army. I’m not supposed to be made fun of! I’m Hitler god damn it! I should be shown respect for all of my hard work that try to do to make this world a juice free world. But instead I just got pointed at and laughed by all. Sigh…I think I should have taken that art school class when I got the chance. At least there I could have made something of myself. But instead all I did was try to do the world a favor…but not even the world appreciates my sacrifices. And even then, my men back at camp are going to think I’m a loser for failing them and they think I’m a total asshole who’s leading them to their deaths. I’m just a loser…a disappointing, dimwitted, loser. Face it…I’m better off dead.”

Forrest then said with a worried look but at the same time a caring look on his face, “Don’t say that Hitler.”

And the Hitler Nugget then asked Forrest with an annoyed look on his face, “And why on earth do you say that red creature?”

Forrest then said to the Hitler Nugget, “Well…I’m a loser too you know?”

The Hitler Nugget then looked surprised with wide, beady little eyes and asked Forrest, “You are? But you’re a Pussy Ass Eating Fart Nugget? You’re supposed to have the whole world under your control and everything?”

Forrest then said with a warm smile, “Yeah…but not every Pussy Ass Eating Fart Nugget can rule the world you know. Some Pussy Ass Eating Fart Nuggets are losers like me and are only the punching bag for their friends whenever they’re angry and need to let off some steam.”

The Hitler Nugget went back to being annoyed and he then said, “Yeah…but you at least have friends. I don’t have anybody.”

Forrest then said with a continued warm smile on his face, “Well…you have a friend now…”

The Hitler Nugget went back to having that surprised look on his face and he then asked Forrest, “You?...you’re my friend red creature? Even though I tried to put you in the ovens right next to the tendies?”

Forrest then said, “Well…yeah…that’s what friends do. They forgive each other even when they hurt each other sometimes. You see…

It’s easy to know a pony

It’s easy to be a phony

But what isn’t easy is to make a friend

Sometimes it is hard to make amends

With those that you may have hurt

But it’s for those that you have burnt

I forgive you

HITLER NUGGET

I don’t quite get it red creature?

What are you trying to say?

FORREST

Well it’s easy to make friends like one, two, three

It’s as easy like climbing up a tree

You just got to follow my words

And heed them like the lord

All you need to do is to forgive

HITLER NUGGET

I still don’t follow red creature

Are you saying that I’m supposed to forgive?

FORREST

No, not quite

You worry about having no friends

Without making any amends

But the thing is about friendship

Is that it’s just like a courtship

Friends forgive each other

Even if one of them killed a Berber

That is what friendship is all about

HITLER NUGGET

Oh I get it now! It’s all about being friends with each other no matter what! Let me try!

You worry about having no friends

Without making any amends

But the thing is about friendship

Is that it’s just like a courtship

Friends forgive each other

Even if one of them killed a Berber

That is what friendship is all about

FORREST

Now you’ve got it

HITLER NUGGET AND FORREST

That is what friendship is all about

That.

Is. What.

Friendship.

Is about

And so after Forrest sang that song to the Hitler Nugget, the Hitler Nugget was smiling away and laughing a bit with pure joy in his heart…assuming chicken nuggets have hearts that is….oh the terrors of eating a live chicken nugget and finding out it‘s alive…oh no….

But anyways, the Hitler Nugget was hugging Forrest and Forrest was hugging back and then the Hitler Nugget let go and was smiling with joy and said to Forrest, “You know what red creature. I mistook you for some horrible pussy ass eating fart nugget that was in conspiracy with the juice. You know…you’ve taught me something that not all of you and your kind are bad.”

Forrest then said with a smile, “I’m glad to hear it Hitler.”

Hitler than said, “I’m going to go back to my camp and tell them what happened! And I’m sure they will forgive me for my mistakes and take me back as one of their own!”

And then the Hitler Nugget was running off and out of the graveyard and back towards his camp…until Forrest said, “Hitler!”

And then after the Hitler Nugget heard his name being called out, the Hitler Nugget turned around with a concerned look on his face and he said in his usual German accent, “Yeah?”

Forrest then asked the Hitler Nugget, “Do you think after you make amends…you can come back and help us out…as friends?”

The Hitler Nugget then had a warm smile appear on his face and he then said kindly back to Forrest, “Sure thing….friend.”

And the Hitler Nugget gave a slight wink and then he was off. And Forrest was left satisfied that he was able to make Hitler think in a new light. That sounded weird, but whatever as soon as the Hitler Nugget went off on his own, that’s when I came running back. Yes, I was running, and was sort of out of breath as well as I tried to breathe in and out and keep my running pace up.

I eventually got to the graveyard, and through the iron gate entrance and what not and Arrell and the others saw me coming. They all got up from their spots and Arrell asked me, “So…did you challenge the green gobbling looking thing?”

I then said while still trying to catch my breath, “Uhh…

A FEW MINUTES BEFORE

So a little flashback I suppose, I was in the middle of town, looking for the giant apple. Luckily it wasn’t hard to miss as I found it within a few minutes of the burning town of Stalia. And as soon as I found it, I went up to it, but the giant apple had its back turned to me.

But I then said out loud, “Hey! Uhh…can I speak to you!?”

And then the giant apple turned around and so did Das and Mac as well, and they were both having a good time with burning the town.

Mac saw me and he then said, “Hi Knight!”

I then said to Mac, “Hi Mac…uhhh…just out of curiosity…did you have something to do with this by chance?”

Mac then said with a smile, “Sure did! Why you ask!?”

I then said in a weird tone in my voice, “Well…you see Mac. What you’re doing is here is wrong. I mean I don’t care about the town of Stalia too much but…having an army of evil red apples to what I’m assuming all to try and kill Applejack is…a little excessive…don’t you think?”

Mac’s smile disappeared and was replaced with a worried one and Mac then said, “Little excessive? What are you? Stupid? It isn’t a little excessive…this is the right thing to do in order to save the world from Applejack.”

I then said to Mac, “I know…but…don’t you think you can climb down from there and try and help us stop this madness? I mean…this special has gone on long enough and…”

Mac then angrily cut me off and said, “NO! YOU DIDN’T WANT TO COME WITH ME AND HELP ME KILL APPLEJACK, SO WHY SHOULD I COME DOWN AND HELP YOU STOP THIS!?”

I then said with a sad face on my face a little bit, “Yeah...I know…and I’m sorry we didn’t consider what you wanted to do…but…”

Das then spoke up and he then said to me, “Didn’t you hear the little pony? He doesn’t want anything to do with you right now and he’s MY new friend. So how about you beat it so we can continue to have our fun…little pony…”

I then gave a slight sigh and a tad bit of a sad look on my face and said, “Well I knew this was going to happen. Specials are never easy for whatever reason. Well how about I challenge you green goblin looking thing…to a fight. At the graveyard. In twenty minutes or so from now.”

Das put his hand up to his chin to think about it and he then said while looking like he was shrugging it off, “Meh…why not, I’m getting bored here anyway! Me and my minions will see you later tonight at the graveyard in twenty ONE minutes! Be there…and be ready to suffer my wrath!”

I then said, “Ok then…sounds nice…see you there then…”

And that’s what happened…

BACK IN THE PRESENT AT THE GRAVEYARD

I then continued with, “Uhhhh…yeah…it went swell. He’ll be here in about like five minutes, we should probably get ready to…”

And then I heard a huge yell in the distance that said, “FIGHT!!!?”

I turned around and there was the giant apple with Mac on it, as well the army of evil red apples.

I then said, “Well…hopefully we’re not fucked. ATTACK!!!”

And as soon as Das heard me yell attack, he looked towards his evil red apple army and said, “After them my minions of the night!! Kill them and show no mercy!”

And then Das said quietly to Mac, “Sit back and enjoy the show little pony.”

Mac with a smile on his face said, “Uhh…sure…whatever you say…friend…”

And then Mac just sat there while we tried to fight off the army of evil red apples. And so with that being said, We charged at the apples as they came to us as well and we fought in the graveyard...adding even more dead bodies to it or something of the like probably. Anyways, with me, I pulled out my guns that I had in my holster with my magic and started to shoot up the place and sending bullets through the apples. With that being said, all the apples burst open after the bullet hit them, which also lead to have some apple mush being everywhere with each hit.

I even kept moving around and even turned my gun sideways and kept moving and shooting, leaving no apples alive. As for Neon, he just made bees appeared from out of nowhere and started to sing a song called, “It’s hip to fuck bees.”

As for Arrell, he did what I suggested and grabbed a tree branch and tried to fight them off by swinging it with his mouth and smashing some apples all around. With Jack, same thing, but instead of a tree branch, it was his lead iron pipe that he brought along for his Halloween costume, but this one was more hard hitting than the tree branch one because it looked like it didn’t take much effort to swing the damn thing and squash so many apples at once. And besides, Jack was tough and he knew what he was doing. And as for Wolf, he had just done planted the lower case wooden T into the ground and covered it in gasoline.

So as the evil red apples drew near him, Wolf grabbed a match and threw it onto the lower case wooden T and soon the lower case wooden T caught on fire and it look like something that the KKK would use on a bonfire night, And as soon as the lower case wooden T was on fire, the evil red apples screeched in pain as they didn’t like it and started to move back.

As for Wolf, he was a bit excited and was pumped up as he said, “YEAH! THAT’ RIGHT! TAKE THAT! YOU ALL SHALL BOW DOWN TO THE ALMIGHTY BURNING LOWER CASE WOODEN T MOTHER FUCKERS!”

And as for Forrest, he tried to put up a fight and put one of his hooves up and he said as apples surrounded him, “I-I’m not afraid to hit you and…kill you guys…so stay back.”

The evil red apples looked at each other and knew he was the weakling of the group just with that and so they jumped Forrest and they started to beat on him like the punching bag that he was. And so you think all was going good…but sad to say…we were starting to get our asses kicked as the apples started to come more in droves and started overwhelming us. We just couldn’t’ handle it anymore as they just kept coming and coming. It was like it was never going to end.

With me, I ran out of bullet and when I heard that clicking sound, I had wide eyes and I said, “Oh come on! I seriously don’t have any more bullets!”

And then the evil red apples jumped me and covered me up and tried to kill me. As for Arrell and Jack, they too tried to fight with all their might, but it was useless as they too got covered up in apples pretty quickly. As for Neon, the apples started to fuck the bees and kill the bees at the same time and they too started to jump on Neon and cover him up.

But as Neon was losing, he then said out loud, “THIS IS FUN! HA HA HA!”

And for Wolf, the apples weren’t even near him and he was happy that his plan worked…for about a few minutes as the fire on the lower case wooden T went out.

Once it did go out, Wolf quickly looked at the lower case wooden T with wide eyes and yelled out, “WHAT?!? NO! NOW IT’ JUST A REGULAR LOWRR CASE WOODEN T! NOT A BURNING ONE! NOOOOOO!”

And then Wolf was swarmed with evil red apples and they started to carry him off somewhere else.

And as he was being carried off, he then said, “NOOOO! GOD HELP ME PLEASSSSSSSSE!”

And as for Forrest…well he was still being beat up. And Mac was watching this all unfold…and you would think with how he acts, he would be loving it and seeing us suffer. But instead, he had a sad and worried look on his face.

So he turned to Das and he asked him while Das had a smile on his face, “Don’t you think that maybe this is a bit too much?”

Das then said to Mac, “Why do you care if it’s too much for them? You said that they didn’t want to be with you earlier tonight? They’re not even your friends anymore…I’m your friend…remember?”

Mac then started to have an angry look on his face and he then said, “Yeah…but they are still my friends!”

And then Mac turned around, leapt off the giant red apple, and landed on the ground and was on equal ground with us.

Mac then looked up towards Das as he was still having a smile on his face and on the giant red apple and he said, “They may have not done right be me tonight by leaving all by myself…but that doesn’t mean they ain’t my friends anymore. They still are…and friends stick by each other no matter what! And friends don’t hurt their friend’s friends either! So if you want to hurt my friends…I don’t think we can be friends anymore. Me and my “real” friends are going to go out and kill Applejack ourselves.”

Das looked at Mac with still a grin on his face and he then said, “Fine then…you can join them then.”

And then Das snapped his fingered and more evil red apples came swarming towards Mac.

In which case after Mac heard Das say those words towards him, he had wide eyes and was a bit confused and he said, “Wait, what?”

And then Mac was jumped by the evil red apples and we were all boned.

And as we were all boned, Das stood high and mighty on the giant red apple and said as he put his hands in the air as thunder came by as Das said out loud, “HA HA HA! THE NIGHT IS MINE! ALL SHALL PERISH WHO OPPOSE MY RULING! THIS HALLOWEEN NIGHT WILL LAST…FOREVER!!! HA HA HA!!!”

And then Das heard a slight voice off in the distance that said to him, “Not on my watch!”

And then Das was confused and turned around quickly as he said, “What?”

And to Das’s surprise, it was the Hitler Nugget and his Nazi Nugget Army, prepared to help fight Das.

The Hitler Nugget had his war face on and he said to his Nazi Nugget Army, “JUMPING NAZIS!!! ATTACK!!!”

And then special Nazi Nuggets that could jump really high charged forward and went ahead and attacked Das by jumping onto the giant red apple and overwhelming him…all while yelling their war cry as well…which was “FICK DEN SAFT!!!”

It was sort of a beautiful sight it was. And so with that being said, as soon as the Jumping Nazi Nugget Soldiers swarmed Das, Das was trying his best to struggle and get the Jumping Nazi Nugget Soldiers off of him.

But sadly for him, it did not work out for Das as he got way too overwhelmed and fell on the ground as he kept yelling, “GET OFF ME! DON’T YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE MESSING WITH!?”

And so with that being said the evil red apples saw what was happening, went away from us and circled around Das, watching their leader being beaten at his own game…kind of. And as we got ourselves together and helped each other up, we went to watch as well and it was satisfying to say the least. As for the evil red apples, they started to whisper to each other and some of them weren’t sure how to respond to what they were seeing and that their leader was weak as Das continued to struggle with the said Jumping Nazi Nugget soldiers.

As for Mac, he was enjoying it and he had that angry look on his face, but wasn’t angry, he had that look that was happy to see the suffering of others.

As Das was suffering, Mac was yelling at him, “WEW! TAKE THAT DAS! YOU DESERVE WHAT YOU GET YOU LITTLE BITCH! IN FACT…I PITY YOU! SO I’M GOING TO TELL YOU WHAT I PUT IN AS MY SECRET INGREDIENT INTO THE APPLES TO HELP MAKE THEM GROW…I FUCKING JIZZ OVER IT MOTHER FUCKA!!!”

The evil red apples over heard what Mac had to say and they soon were disgusted and appalled by it and the thought really started to become sickening to the point where one of the evil red apples said out loud, “There’s cum inside of us? EEEEEEWWWWww!”

And so all the evil red apples took guns and blew their own brains. How or why…do not ask. And as soon as all the evil red apples turned into mush and their spirits from the fifth dimension went back home to their dimension…the fifth dimension. Das was left all alone as he continued to struggle with the Jumping Nazi Nugget soldiers on him.

But Das saw what happened to his minions and he said out loud as he reached his arm out as if he was desperately trying to grab them before they can escape, “WAIT! COME BACK! DON’T GO! I’M ALL ALONE HERE!”

And then the ground underneath Das started to open up, as the sun started to rise in the distance, and hands started to surround Das and pull him underground.

Once Das saw what was happening, Das said out loud, “WAIT! NO! NOT NOW! I PROMISE I’LL TRY HARDER! DON’T DO THIS TO ME! MAAAAAAC HEEEEELP MEEEEE!”

And those were Das’s last words he as pulled underground, not to be seen on that day or the next day or the day after tomorrow…but who would want to watch the day after tomorrow…I would rather hang myself with the wire to the super Nintendo controller then watch that piece of dog shit movie. Anyways, the world was saved…or Equestria was, as the flames that engulfed Stalia burned out, although the damage had already been done.

Pretty much everyone in town was dead and burned alive…even the babies and wittle kids as well. And the sun started to rise in the distance and it was a beautiful sight to see as well.

As for the Hitler Nugget and his Nazi Nugget Army, they all cheered with a job well done and the Hitler Nugget walked over to Forrest with his Nazi Nugget Army and said to Forrest, “Thank you red creature for helping me. You are a true friend.”

Forrest, who was having an embarrassing smile on his face, had red cheeks, and a big ol’ smile, said, “Awww...it was nothing.”

The Hitler Nugget then said, “Maybe I won’t be sending the red creature to the ovens after all. Thanks again friend! See you in the next special?”

Forrest then said, “Sure...it’ll be Christmas you know…”

The Hitler Nugget then said, “I’ll be looking forward to it.”

The Hitler Nugget then gave a wink towards Forrest and he then walked away with himself, his dignity, and his Nazi Nugget Army. As for us, we all got together, still in our costumes, although our costumes were badly damaged during the fight and didn’t look like it would be good to use for another day.

But we all got together, even Wolf, and I then said, “Well…I’m glad that’s over. We finally completed our first Halloween special. Now hopefully it doesn’t continue.”

Mac then said, “Yeah…I’ll admit…it was a bit much…but it sure was fun riding a giant red apple through town. Wish I could have killed Applejack thought with it.”

Mac then had a sad face on and looked like he was down in the dumps. But I still had a heart of course so I then said with a caring face, “Sorry about not wanting to do what you wanted to do Mac. We should have considered what you wanted to do instead of trying to do what we wanted to do.”

Mac then quickly put his head back up and put a smile back on his face while giving me a slight punch in the arm with his right hoof as he said to me, “Don’t worry about it Knight. There’s always next year….so do you think we can still try and kill Applejack later today maybe?”

I then said as I rolled my eyes towards the back of my head, “Sure, we can do it. Just don’t go crazy like what you tried to do tonight.”

Mac then said with a smile, “Sure thing…but no promises.”

I then said, “Welp…let’s go home then.”

Arrell then asked me, “Yea…but…isn’t Stalia destroyed?”

Wolf then butted in and said, “Yeah…didn’t everypony in town die last night and was burned alive?”

I then said to them as we started to walk off towards town with a beautiful sunrise in the background that gave off a warm orange glow, “No one fucking cares Wolf. Ponies here die like every fucking time whenever something wacky happens. They’ll just be replaced in time for the next special.”

Wolf then said, “Oh…ok then.” And then we went back to our homes, cleaned up, and had a relaxing day of not having any complicated adventure happening to us.

SOMEWHERE DEEP UNDERGROUND EQUESTRIA

And of course it’s not quite over just yet. So located somewhere deep under Equestria, in a cave or some shit like that, lied where Das was being held at. It was a very dark places and he was being held down or in place by a bunch of black, stringy, creepy looking arms that were coming out from the walls. And it looked like Das was in pain and he was in agony or something like that.

And as he was on his backside, looking upwards with big eyes and wondering if the pain would ever stop, he yelled out to himself, “WHY ME!? DID I NOT PLEASE YOU OH DEAR DARK ORD!? I AM MERELY THE KING OF HALLOWEEN AND HAVE SERVED YOU WELL! WHY WILL YOU NOT HEED MY CALL FOR HELP OH DEAR DARK LORD! PLEASE…JUST GIVE ME A SECOND CHANCE FOR NEXT YEAR’S HALLOWEEN SPECIAL!”

And then a deep, booming voice that was disembodied said to Das, “FUCK YOU! I’M SENDING OUT THE HEADLESS HORSEMEN NEXT YEAR! YOU CAN JUST SIT THERE AND FUCKING GO FUCK YOURSELF MOTHER FUCKER! I WAS FUCKING SLEEPING UTIL YOUR WHINY BITCH ASS SHOWED UP! SO SHUT THE FUCK UP NIGGA!”

And then the headless horseman appeared from what seemed like out of nowhere and held his head, which was a generic looking pumpkin that was on fire and said, “Eyup! That’s me! Ha ha ha ha…”

And he said it in a goofy tone and a laugh…like he was retarded or something. So until next year’s Halloween special…this is Knight…signing off…hopefully not though…fuck Neil Druckman….

Credits:

Knight

Wolf

Mac farmer

Arrell

Classy Jack

Neon Party

Forrest Fire

~~TK~~

~~Das~~ Clarence

Hitler Nugget

Nazi Nugget General

Stalin

The Red Army

The Nazi Nugget Army

Evil red Apples

Giant evil retarded apple

The spooky ghost .gif

The Dark Lord

With special cameo by:

The Headless Horseman

Crew:

9/11: Bush

Candle Vigil: Boomers

This was: A bad Idea

Thought it would be cool: But it was alright

Took a lot to write this one special: why did I do this

Oh well: I’ll do it again probably

Fuck me: Right?

7/11: Jeb Bush

Bongo Cat: He did the drums or something

Boo: I’m a ghost

Are you: scared yet?

No?: Oh Come on!

I’m a spooky Ghost!: and it’s Halloween damn it!

Fuck these kids these days: They don’t know what scary is

Fuck me: And my life

A Special written by The Masked Ghost

Also known as Bob Tom

Have a spooky and scary Halloween everypony…see you next year…

Maybe…

Author's Note

Ok so sorry for getting this out late and not making the original time of 7:00 P.M. CST/ 8:00 P.M. EST, I had some technical difficulties. And you can thank Microsoft for the delay because everything was going fine...but then my laptop was forced an update DESPITE ME TURNING THE UPDATES OFF...SEVERAL FUCKING TIMES... the update happened and it fucked with my computer. The mouse kept freezing so I had to go out and buy a new one and somehow that work. All I have to say is FUCK MICROSOFT AND WINDOWS 10 AND 8.1... LONG LIVE 7 AND XP...SPECIALLY XP...

Other than that, I was also running behind and I had to stay up several nights just to get this done. Whether or not this will happen again next year...I'm not sure...but I can at least tell you if it does, I've got ideas for next year's Halloween special. But if it doesn't...at least you'll still be getting a Christmas special later this year. I still have no clue what it will be all about..but it'll be about something...

So other than that...Happy Nightmare Night and see you for the Christmas season....HO HO HO MOTHER FUCKERS!!!

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 1
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

Universal Apocalypse Life: Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 1

Episode 2: The Best of the Neon Part 1:

Ahhh… Jesus, I’m here again. And I’m still alive aren’t I? Yup, fucking alive still, what a thrill, isn’t it? You’d think I just commit suicide by now in Neon’s world, but nope. He makes sure to keeps us alive.

I think Forrest tried to hang himself, which is a funny yet sad site to see him do. I mean he was in tears man, like you don’t understand, he felt like there was nothing left for him so he went to the closet located somewhere in the god forsaken Part Store and tried to hang himself.

And he was ready to go, got the good rope, cause if you use the bad rope, then you definitely deserve to die. Have some respect for yourself god damn it. But he got the good rope, tied it up in a Pony Knot, and tied it up around a metal coat hanger bar thingy, whatever those things are called, got on a small chair, and tried to hang himself.

I say funny cause even though it’s just us now and it would be wise for all of us to stick together through this Neon Crises that Neon himself made on us, we still treat Forrest as our punching bag. And in terms of order, Jack is the one who uses him the most, I’m somewhere near the bottom, and Arrell is the last since he has a heart for him in some cases, but uhhh… he does push him to the side every now and then.

Anyways, it’s just funny because… you know… look at him go, but truth be told, even for me it’s kind of sad since one, he’s our punching bag, we need him through this time of crises, or else it’s a threat to democracy or something. And two… ehhhhhh you just can’t help but feel bad for the poor little fella.

He’s trying to hang on to whatever he has got left, even us, and even though you’d think it would be us that would send him to the brink of suicide, it was Neon’s cruel world that sent him overboard. He can’t take the world being colorless. Now you’d think he would use his Fireboom to perhaps maybe get us out of this mess, but Neon just doesn’t burn in the flames that easily as you think.

He is truly a monster of this world and of this universe. But whatever, and as Forrest tried to hang himself, well suffice it to say, Neon bust the door open with a smile like usual and brought him down as soon as Forrest tipped that chair.

And all he said to him, “Where you going there buddy!? You can’t leave the party! We’re friends forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever…”

And I think he said ever like twenty one more times or something. But whatever, I’m just spit balling here, trying to make conversation with you… journal. Why the fuck am I even writing in a journal anyway? It’s pointless. Eh, whatever, maybe someone might come across this and find out what happened to us if anyone manages to get their hands on this.

Perhaps humans will find this, or maybe demons. Or the Jews, the Space Jews. Note to Space Jews, if you can please get us out of this mess with your Jew Space Magic, We promise to be very good goys and maybe even convert. I know we would be treated as the impure bloods, but it’s better than this life. But then again… even I doubt even the Space Jews can defeat Neon in his current state. If anything, that might just be leading sheep to the slaughter. Anyways, let’s continue on and talk what happened today! Today was… great… just fucking great…

So where should I begin now? Hmmm, I know. We start outside… again… I know, a great place to start everything is outside, even a good ol’ fashioned genocide. Why take the showers inside, when you can do it outside? It’s like magic! Anyways, while pretty much everyone was inside the Party Store, just hanging around, wondering when we will we be free from all of this madness and Neon’s grasp and just trying to pass the time while the world is all but finished dying, we had sent Forrest out to see and scout for shit.

We really didn’t know what we had wanted him to find, we just wanted him to go out and face the world and see how he was when he came back, he mostly came back fucked up though. But anyways, he was walking around what used to be the park area of Stalia, in which case not much had changed since the explosion. Sure it used to look a little bit more alive before the explosion, yet I feel not much had changed since then.

Just goes to show you how much Stalia put money into the looks of the town… let alone the stability of it all. Anyways, the trees were either dead or long gone, the grass was lifeless, the benches were broken in half and burned to a crisp. And to top it off, no birds to sing a lovely tune or a flower to blossom to brighten someone’s day.

It was all just dead and lifeless that park was as of now. Not much to say other than it was a sore to the eyes to look at, perhaps even heartbreaking to see nature go away in a flash just like that. But Forrest, with his head hanging low and his eyes shifting around in worry, making sure to keep an eye out for anything… even Neon since you never knew when he would pop up, was walking slowly along what used to be a path through the park. The constant sounds of sirens in the distance were still there from last time as well as a nearby moaning that no one could not pin point.

And as Forrest was walking along the broken path, he said to himself quietly, “Ohhh… why do the guys keep sending me out on missions like this? One of them could at least come with me to make sure I’m alright. Just keep it together Forrest, you can do this. Just one hoof at a time.”

And then Forrest stopped in his tracks as he had just noticed what appeared to have been an aborted, unborn fetus on the ground, and an unborn fetus that was half way burned to be exact.

It was small and shivered up on the ground, just lying there lifeless with darkened holes where it’s eyes should be at and a tiny mouth. As Forrest spotted this, he didn’t have a shocking look on his face, his face got a little bit more sadder as he looked down and stared upon its lifeless corpse. And as he just stood there for a second, the wind picked up just a bit, with the thoughts of the poor little fetus and what it could have been if it had not been for Neon.

After a few seconds had passed, Forrest just said out loud, by himself, “Poor little guy. Wish things weren’t like this way. But they are. Hope you’re somewhere better and far from here at least. I’m sure the parents would have loved you though, as well as the world.”

And then something unexpected happened as the unborn fetus started to move its mouth and talk a bit as it moaned and groaned at the same time, but at a very high pitched, baby kind of way if you could imagine.

It said, “Eeeehhhh Ma…ma… Ma…ma… Ma…ma… where… my… ma… ma… Eeeehhhhh…”

It had said all very slowly too. And as for Forrest, his eyes opened wide and now his face was shocked since he didn’t expect the undead to come back to life.

But since there was some weird type of radiation in the air, the kind that oddly didn’t kill us surprisingly, probably because of Neon, it would make sense that the unborn fetus was alive. Or hell maybe it was Neon’s doing. Either way, Forrest was scared shitless so he immediately used his wings and flew the fuck out of there.

And as he used his wings to fly at high speeds, he went straight back to the Party Store and crashed through the doors of the store. And once he did, he landed perfectly on the ground, very suddenly as it caught all of our attention and we all had our eyes on him with a look of curiosity as well.

And as Forrest had came what felt like him crashing through, he was breathing a bit heavily as well as he said somewhat frantically, “You guys! You won’t believe what I found out there!”

He was saying it in a scarred, yet a tone of urgency as well.

Arrell then asked him, “What, you saw a creepy looking figure out in the distance again?”

Forrest then responded to him with, “No! I saw a baby that was just sitting out there. I thought it was dead, but then it came back to life!”

I then said to Forrest, “So a zombie then? Yeah nothing new Forrest, we’ve came across those already and frankly it’s getting old.”

I had said it with a look of tiredness, but that mellowed out kind of tiredness, where everything is ok, but annoyed.

And then Jack spoke up and said to him, “Pfft… pussy.”

Mac then said with an annoyed look on his face, “Yeah, I thought you had saw some walking talking apples or something! I bet those things know what happened to around these here parts!”

I then looked to Mac and told him, “Yeah you don’t want to meet those apples. In fact I hope those things are dead.”

Mac then asked me, “What?”

I then told Mac, “Forget what I just said.”

I then turned my attention towards Forrest and his little problem as I said to him, “Look Forrest, it was just a zombified unborn fetus, not the boogeyman. Now let’s just move on with life, no one cares about your post first world problems.”

Forrest then came to terms what I had told him and made a little wimping sound with it while hanging his head a little bit low. But then he started to look around the place and noticed someone was missing.

Forrest then asked curiously, “Hey… where’s Neon at?”

And then the speak of the devil came at the right time as Neon busted through the doors behind him, as that then made Forrest jump up as he was startled and screeched a bit. He then of course turned around to see Neon, as well as all of our attention towards him as well.

Neon, with the smile as usual said to Forrest as soon as he busted through the doors, “Hey Forrest, guess what!?”

Forrest then asked him while holding his left hoof up a little bit in the air and nervously asked, “What?”

Neon then pointed towards him with his right hoof and told him, “You’re the Friend of the month!”

Forrest then said to him, “Ohhh… ok then…”

And then there was just silence as the wind passed us by and we just sat there and gave a look of awkwardness towards Neon. And as for Neon, he raised his head a little bit and went crossed eye during the few seconds of awkward silence. As for me, I just raised my right eyebrow, wondering where this was going to.

And then Neon broken his silence as then he went un-cross eyed and asked all of us, “Guess what I found!”

And then Neon twisted his arms to this back of him and somehow stretched it outward enough, Neon I guess, all without turning his body, and then came back and grabbed a somehow still alive adult pony corpse that was pretty much half a zombie and was burned all the way to a black charcoal. He had pulled the corpse, that was still alive and just barely standing, yet you couldn’t tell who it used to be at all, in front of himself.

And from there, Neon stood on his back two legs and proceeded to control the pony corpse’s two front arms with having pony corpse also stand p on its back two legs as Neon continued to say with a smile as he poked his head around its right shoulder, “Its name is Sunburst!”

And Sunburst the practically dead pony corpse just gave out a long, moaning groaning sound, not saying a word. It was as if he sounded like an old guy that was in constant pain.

And then Neon continued to speak for Sunburst as he then said to Forrest, “He says that he wants to challenge you to a competition! Whoever does the worst wins! Now let’s go you guys!”

Forrest was hesitant to speak up, but he then said to neon, “B-But I don’t want to though.”

Neon then said with smile again, “Let’s go you guys!”

Forrest then said, “No.”

He had said it in a very insecure kind of way, almost as if he was unsure of himself.

But then Neon just said to him, “I said let’s go you guys,” all with a smile as always.

Forrest then said, “But I…”

Neon then cut him off as Neon’s eyes went back to being entirely black with a red pupil and his voice changed to that of a demon’s voice as he then said to Forrest, “I said get outside now or else I’m devouring your soul through your eyes tonight!”

Forrest with his eyes being big as he was scared for his life, and a little bit for us as well since we would be involved somehow, then said to him quickly, “Ok, I’m going.”

OUTSIDE, SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF STALIA…

So we were all outside, out in the open, as we kept our distances. And of course Wolf was still in the corner chilling as well. He is taking this all too well I’d say. Anyways, Forrest and Neon, while holding his new pet that he named Sunburst by the armpits, were standing out, a few feet apart. There was a can in front of Forrest and Sunburst.

And then Neon said out loud, “Whoever can pick up the can first loses!”

Forrest, who had a worried look up until now, started to smile a bit as he had gotten the thought in his head a little bit it had seemed, really I don’t know, I’m just guessing since I can’t read minds. Yeah, maybe I should explain how I’m getting all of this. While I can’t escape the hands of fate that is also Neon, I got bored and made a up a spell that can basically show the events up to twenty four hours within this world, and a little outward. I can still do that kind of magic, but I do need to keep it a secret since… I’m sure Neon doesn’t like it.

Or maybe he does know, but either way, it’s the best that I’ve got. Magic doesn’t affect Neon after all…

Anyways, back to what was happening, Forrest was thinking to himself probably how it easy this was to him and wasn’t some weird or crazy thing to him as he had a little smile on him. And then he looked slightly over towards Neon for a bit, before looking back down at the unlabeled metal tin can, to which he then used his left hoof and picked it up from the ground.

And as Forrest had done so, he had rolled his eyes, in a nice way and said to Neon, “Oh no, I guess I lose and…”

Forrest was quickly cut off as the can’s top then unexpectedly opened as a bunch of baby spiders started to crawl out of it. And it then of course started to devour Forrest which then prompted Forrest to run around, fly a bit, screaming as the little baby spiders just crawled all over him.

As Forrest went, “AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!,” all over the place, Neon was just staring off into empty space as he had forced Sunburst the Corpse to try and pick up the can without much effort.

He did not.

So Neon just said, while staring off into space, “Looks like Sunburst couldn’t pick it up since it was too heavy for him! That means he loses and wins this challenge! Next!”

BACK AT THE PARTY STORE…

You’d think Neon would just keep it all in one place, but nope. Well what happened next was that we all went up to an empty, white wall in the store with what looked like a bucket of red paint with a paintbrush in it next to Forrest and Sunburst the Corpse.

As for us, we again just stayed the fuck back as much as we could without pissing off Neon. Neon had then said to Forrest, “The next challenge is a fun one! Whoever paints the worst picture on the wall with children’s blood wins!”

Forrest’s eyes just popped again as he looked at disgust at the blood near him on the ground.

He then said to himself, “Children’s blood?”

Forrest didn’t move, he didn’t feel good as his face started to turn green as his mouth was slightly opened.

Arrell then asked Forrest, “Uhh… Forrest, are you alright?”

However Forrest didn’t respond back as he just then abruptly puked up huge chunks all over the wall for a couple of quick seconds. The wall was then covered in green vomit, as the vomit spilled a little bit on his chin and on to his hooves.

Forrest didn’t look too well as he looked a bit dazed and confused. As for Neon however, he made Sunburst the Corpse grab the paint brush and draw a little smiley face with the children’s blood.

In which turn Neon said with a smile, “This picture is the worst with Children’s Blood! That means Sunburst wins this round… again!”

And the strangely Sunburst the Corpse, still moaning and groaning, spoke two little words just barely and said, “Kill me…”

Don’t we all… am I right?

A Nice Little Bedtime Story For Kids
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My Little Pony: Alternate Universal Magic

A Nice Little Bedtime Story For Kids

One Day Liam Nession Walked Into A Bar.

He Killed Everyone Inside.

The End.